2001: A Solar Bore

Rating: 3/10 (9 February 2001)

Possibly the most overrated science fiction film ever made, 2001: A Space Odyssey is more eye-candy than substance. Supposedly the film tells how extraterrestrial powers are behind the evolution of intelligence in humans or something to that effect, but in my opinion the film brings this message out in a very heavy-handed and overblown way. The first 20 minutes or so of the film aren't much more complex than your usual National Geographic primate documentary, instead with actors in ape suits in the place of real apes. Of course for no discernible reason, a monolith appears in the middle of an ape-tribe's camp overnight and merely the act of briefly pawing it makes them smart enough to use bones as weapons. Kubrick was obviously trying to make the monolith and its powers seem mystical and beyond the realm of human comprehension, but in this case he leaves too much to the imagination, as in failing to explain how the monolith got there, how it distributes intelligence, and why it would do such a thing. It's never explained, as very little is explained over the course of the film. Most of the film seems similarly vague and ambiguous, resulting in a downward spiral of confusion and boredom.
Shortly afterward, the audience is bombarded with shot after dreary shot of space ships floating around in outer space. This entire 5-10 minute sequence serves absolutely no purpose other than to woo and wow the crowd with special effects. In this case, this "classic" science fiction masterpiece is no better than your average Hollywood special effects spectacular nowadays. With modern audiences no longer wowed by such effects, the sequence seems hollow and boring, made even worse because the pay-off is two extended scenes of William Sylvester attending meetings on a space station and a moon base. These may well be two of the most boring and pointless scenes ever to make it into a theatrical film. Possibly Kubrick meant to contrast modern, boring man with the prehistoric (and also boring) primate man. None of it really comes together though as there is no sense of collision between these two sections of the film, and hence no cohesion to hold it together other than the appearance of the monolith, which for no discernible reason emits a high-pitched scream at Sylvester and his team of astronauts.
The highly touted sequence involving HAL, the ultra-intelligent super-computer who terrorizes a deep-space exploration mission to Jupiter, seems kind of a side note to the greater story, and doesn't really fit in at all with the whole monolith/human intelligence theme. The Jupiter Mission would have made for a good movie in itself, and is by and large the most interesting section of the entire film, but once again, what does it have to do with anything? As can be expected, the ending is also highly pretentious and tries to put several meanings past the audience at once, not only making no sense whatsoever, but also remaining completely boring. 2001: A Space Odyssey is a film that definitely hasn't stood the test of time, and will do little more than bore its audience during the year it was meant to depict.