Monoliths that make no sense and a murderous computer

Rating: 1/10 (5 August 2015)

I'm sorry, but this film was absolute trash. The people who rave about how it's "such a great piece of art" would look at a white sheet of paper and call that art because it "allows the viewer to create their own visualization of the nature of art" or something like that. NO. This movie lacked everything that any sane person would look for in a decent movie. See: plot, character development, storytelling, not being a general trip to hell laced with LSD and shrooms, and GOOD music. Don't get me wrong, I love the Blue Danube, but not when I have to watch a spaceship creep slowly towards a dock FOR 7 FREAKING MINUTES. This was just horrible. Here's a general synopsis (semi-spoilers):
Blackness More blackness Still more blackness Creepy chorus music (and still black) SUNRISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! monkeys monkeys MONOLITH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! monkeys + monolith SUPER MONKEYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Spaceship spaceship spaceship Forced and failed character development spaceship spaceship same spaceship more spaceship Super secret government meeting about strange moon rectangle eons long trip to see strange rectangle MONOLITH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! more creepy chorus MY EARS!!!! THEY BLEED!!!!!! (loud high pitched screech) DIfferent spaceship spaceship spaceship spaceship running in a spaceship more running running running (is Forrest gump in this movie?) Totally useless exposition via newscaster Weird forced conversation with a computer find out something is wrong with a transmitter go to remove the broken part still going going still going are we there yet? Finally back Nothing is wrong with the part Super secret meeting between two crew members about maybe disconnecting the faulty computer (that the computer totally overhears) Computer kills everyone but Dave "I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that" Dave kills HAL ACID TRIP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Dave gets old in a weird room SPACE BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DUN DUN DUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Like I said, terrible movie.