Somehow, a boring science fiction movie...

Rating: Null/10 (11 July 2002)

I got to see this movie last night and let me tell you, it was a terrible disappointment. It had the three elements that make for a cool sci-fi movie: Spaceships, a Homicidal Computer, and Monkeys. But somehow, it was off the mark.
Maybe my own expectations were too high. I tend to love space movies. Forbidden Planet, Flesh Gordon, Event Horizon, Star Wars Episode II Attack of the Clones (best in series!), for me, practically any movie with a spaceship is worth checking out.
I've seen other movies by this director (Stanley Kubrick) that were really cool. Full Metal Jacket was a great war adventure movie, and Eyes Wide Shut is still the best Tom Cruise/Nicole Kidman flick. But I guess even decent directors are entitled to one turkey. 2001 is Kubrick's turkey. Here's why:
1: Boring Monkeys - The monkeys didn't do anything cool or interesting, they just got all freaked out at this big black box thing. The scene felt "tacked on," like the director wanted to make the movie longer for some reason. If you're gonna have monkeys, at least put them on a space-ship and have them do funny stuff, like the space-monkey in the Lost in Space movie (a far superior sci-fi!)
2: Boring Spaceships - The spaceships in this movie moved very slowly, vey quietly, and had no hull-mounted laser cannons. Like they didn't want to spend money on good special effects.
3. Boring Homicidal Computer - When a robot goes haywire and starts killing people, there should be a shower of sparks and a robot voice saying things like "Crush...Kill...Destroy!" The HALBOT 9000 or whatever it's called just looks like a red light mounted on the wall. What an utter lack of imagination on the director's part.
Also, to make the movie still even longer, there's this trippy, overly long scene at the end where the surviving astronaut (SPOILER ALERT!) sees himself as an old man and a fetus. He also sees the big black cornflake box, to give the movie kind of a trick ending. Two stars out of 10 for 2001 a Space Odyssey. Rent Battle Beyond the Stars or Independence Day instead.