Warning ! Do under NO circumstances see this film. It sucks !

Rating: 1/10 (11 December 2000)

This is THE worst movie I have ever seen, and believe me - I have seen a lot of crappy movies ( like Ghostdog ). So what is so fundamentally wrong with this movie ? First of all I believe that a movie should tell a story, and this story should be compelling, realistic and fully understandable. This is where it fails. The movie doesn't tell a story. And it takes about 2,5 hours not telling this story. You could just as well just sit around and watch your TV when it's turned off. It's just as interesting.
The movie begin with a bunch of monkeys jumping around. Then they jump around a black rock. Then they jump with a bone in their hands. This is the first 30 minutes of the movie ! Fortunately I have read the first 150 pages of the book, so I understood why they did all of this. But someone who has never read the book would never have a chance of understanding this.
Then suddenly we're in space. And we spend 15 minutes watching a ship dock with a spacestation ( doing your laundry is more fun than this). After that there actually is a bit of a plot. We follow a guy as he travels to a spacestation on the moon, where they have found a new black rock that emits a powerful electromagetic radiation. After they have gone down to this rock, the plot make another leap to something totally different.
Suddenly - without an explanation - we're on a ship that's headed for jupiter. There we spend over 1 hour watching a computer go a little nuts.
After they find the third black rock we get to see 10 minutes of strange colors. Then it ends in someones strange livingroom.
This movie is so slow, and wierd, and not to mention BAD - that it shouldn't be allowed to exist. The life is too short to watch this crap.