God Awful

Rating: Null/10 (6 December 2015)

Arguably, the worst A-budget movie ever made. It is to the average movie what a splatter painting is to a Rembrandt. For the same money blown up by these clowns, a hundred decent films could have been made. It's like some nutjob at Paramount gave 35-million to a bunch of 12-year olds and told them to blow it up real good. Except they blew it up real bad. I don't know what this nitroglycerin mess was reaching for, but it's like nothing I've seen in some 65-years of movie watching. Apparently, impresario Spielberg was suffering from a temporary lobotomy, proving I guess that even the best can have periods of blackout. He should be glad there's no law against cinematic crimes like this, otherwise he'd be in the Big House. All in all, the mindless repetition is about as funny as two-hours of world destruction where no one feels pain except the audience. No need to go on. Words, as they say, don't begin to suffice. A Big Fat "O" on a scale where the Three Stooges rate an artistic "10".