creativity requires that you work very hard to same time it comes to you almost magically you don't know why or how it happened your whole being is committed to the creative act i'm transformed on to sue a different plane and that plane is where my religion and my artistic come together it's an  kind of master a lot of this these books but my last year in graduate school i was sitting in that class and it was hard semester on and i'm sure who are german theologian by the name  ritual and i was sketching pictures of my professor which i always did because you can stare at them and i would stare at them and draw their pictures if i didn't like them i give them a vague nose and my friend who was sitting next to me in the class she said charles you're going with me today in our class tonight and i did i went to class downtown in madison new jersey and i started taking classes and drawing and painting and the paintings got thicker and thicker and eventually turned into sculpture but to do sculpture and painting and drawing fit my brain because it's about the same time i really because this is negative phrase but dyslexia is common for a lot of people i was really strongly  oriented toward right brain thinking which images and pictures instead of left brain which is words paragraphs pages books in the daytime i was working as a pastor and  quite caught up with the new translation which says it's ok meeting the hebrews did in the wilderness so it's no problem with images what's the problem if you're making an idol and the new translation says you shall not make and i don't well i was teaching th my sculpture but i started out using other artists but always wanted to put pictures in the books and the writing because pictures just alchemy made sense and then i gradually made books that had my own sculpture pictures in them about i still had to make a living and i did that and a church that has been very much and not cutting in much because that doesn't work when you do that this is a release culture which is actually these are pretty much all the same but you get that perspective riches of magical makes it look like it's real if you do it right difficult for him to pull that load and then many times in my life and probably a lot of other people that you just doing all you can to to make it through the day didn't look like you're going to survive and it feels like you're pulling a very heavy load and you don't know what to do with it and a lot of us go through life feeling like we're pulling a heavy in there all and that's what i discovered when i was carving that wouldn't be hey i'm pulling loads of stuff that i did d that he's pulling except in his own head one i made after that is a picture of me sitting in a sleigh with these wild horses  pulling the sleigh but the hind me there is my task and we all carry our children with us that is by that i mean our selves as a child my child is limb kind of sitting around the farm for a long time and then i realized that if i turned it upside down put the roots here would have arms for of murder that you can imagine and he said he's hanging there in our church protestant churches we have  an empty cross because it's my belief that jesus resurrected and did not actually die permanently he came back and that's why the cross is empty that's the way it is in nearly all protestant churches that have any but he was crucified it's an important part of our religion to say that someone has the courage to die for someone else for everybody if you believe him the gospel for me is not just a private personal thing private we try to work for peace internationally and nationally and then i'll call communities to say and you communicate with our lives that we can live in a very harmonious way if we're just back off and stop trying to impress people with our riches and with our prestige and let the child and it's come far and be more loving and more creative him more peaceful in our lives both locally nationally and internationally and we back off from this aggressive approach to life which is very death dealing we have two eyes we have t yours and fortunately just one mouse and but in our church we have done away with the reformation with a lot of images with what