in christianity tell us because i will be honest sometimes those in christianity are sharing lies not the truth and we're going to find out what i mean by that in just a moment or look at this so number one is a lie it is your fault that you were abused harmed abandoned whatever it was that happened to you and here are the common lies it's your fault that you were my last did do you know those who is normally have been involved in victims of sexual of the station wh told all the time by the perpetrator it's your fault is your fault you were raped if you hadn't been the alleyway you would have got raped well maybe if you had been the other way you you would have got raped but is it your fault that a man rapes you  so if i'm in an alley with a if i'm in an alley with the skirt be praying for me but if but if a woman is that i started to fight as of alec with the skirt that would have worked then ugh work out good if there's a woman with a skirt and a low cut  dress and she's walking the elliot in the alley at two o'clock in the morning is there potential of being raped but if she gets raped is it her fault no does every understand that ok then what about it's your fault that i'm beating on you if you just do what i tell you i wouldn't be beating on you anybody know that users say that to day is therefore it's your fault that your father abandoned us so mom might say to the kid you know what it's all because of you because you are you know mentally retarded because you're dis or that are your father left us and that's why we don't have any food in the house does that create baggage  somebodies life salut lee it's your fault that your mother had a nervous breakdown is it could be i actually was told that it was but my brother said it's because of you that mom had a nervous breakdown and the worst possible truth in that ok but but we do we understand the concept that we're getting at that all these different things here let her be a victim is a victim there are not a perpetrator is not their fault for whatever harm that has occurred to them yes all of  you can live perfectly and bad things can happen to you there's job example of joe there's christian martyrs ok so even the even though that you could be serving god completely bad things can happen to you and if you're not serving god bad days can happen but not all those bad things are your fault because again i am not as a victim no matter what i'm a victim of i'm not  i'm a victim i am a victim i'm not the perpetrator so to make the victim photos if they're the guilty party is that destructive absolutely is a giant lie that comes out there listen  especially are not responsible for what has happened to them also many individual have been wounded to harm the first years of their life when they're not even able to make choices you're not the guilty party if something harmful as happened to you mark one forty two whoever causes one of these little ones who believe to stumble it be better for him if the mill it heavy stone on or around his neck and be cast into the sea how they got is making it very clear that when people do things that are harmful to children that there is a punishment that should be there and the fact that the children are not the victim so one of the ways to move beyond the past is the stop playing the tape that somehow i am guilty for what has happened to me because again people especially with sexual abuse especially with verbal abuse especially with religious abuse you know there's religious  jesus if you don't dress a certain way you don't love jesus if this or this or this or that all those things and then to somebody that young they start to believe that lie and so if you were to move beyond the past you  the confront that lie with truth number two another lie is you have not forgiven unless you forget anybody ever told you forgive and forget that's a lie you can forgive  never going to forget if you really forgive someone you'll forget about the harm they have done to you you must still have from forgiveness since you because you still you must still have on forgiveness because you told somebody about what happened to you what you you know what if you really gave dad that abused you for thirty years you wouldn't tell anybody a good christian daughter would never reported dead to the police that abused her for thirty years because if you you just forget about and pretend it never happened that's when the pit of hell you do know that that's a lie and that lie if somebody believes that keeps them in the bondage because what happens is they can they continue to walk in shame and embarrassment and guess what they can't really forgive because what happens is the person tells them you didn't really forgive unless you forget so then they take tell themselves i guess i didn't forgive i should forgive but i can't get the memory out of my life i must not have really forgiven that's bondage if you remove the past you have to go up against those lies that are be forgiveness does not require you to forget what happened to you forgiveness does not erase the memory forgiveness les's the pain from the memory that makes sense so forgiveness is not going to remove the memory but forgiveness can make it that when you have that memory it doesn't haunt you and touch you the same way as is done before give forgiveness gives the bill to move on despite the memory that's the power of forgiveness it think about this if when we forgave the memory was god and god just erased out of our mind what power isn't that the real power is that you can forgive in the memory still there that's amazing after all that your dad did to you you forgave him yes that's power after what that pastor did to you you're not against every church yeah i refuse to hold it against every church of the pastor did to me that's power if it's wiped out of your memory of course anybody that if you forgave him is wiped out your memory you can forgive that be easy the hard part is the forgive and that that memory is still going to be there but the and god gives the power to forgive all of a sudden there's victory letter c it should be noted if you feel the need to continue to repeat the war story in a might be a sign that you haven't truly forgiven so there's nothing wrong with in the midst of a  testimony to show you know this happened to him and i've been able to forgive them you're trying to counsel somebody as you share with some things that have happened to you that's one thing but if a person keeps telling you the war story maybe they haven't forgiven you know i mean so every person they see they tell what happened to him they have this badge it says i'm a victim i'm a victim a victim then you probably haven't forgiven but you can forgive and then uses what happened to you as a testimony there's a difference between sharing about what has happened to you the true and then jeremiah thirty one thirty four says in their sin every member no more god says here sent every member no more so god can choose to forget now i don't know if god really forgets does it matter if you forgets because maybe he did he remembers but he just doesn't use it he doesn't use it against you so doesn't matter if you actually forgets or not as long as he doesn't use it against you and he was  mental health issues because if you can't remember it you probably went into our la la land someplace and not living in reality ok right number three if you forgive someone you should trust them  ever heard that one nobody's heard that one i hear it all the time if you're a good christian you should trust me because you say you forgave me so you should just trust me if you're a good christian  where the bible say that the bible doesn't say that when you forgive somebody you have to trust them so this take a look at it is a lie and there's that and listen when you believe these lies they keep you in the past and will explain it a here's one of the lies if you really forgive your father for sexual abuse you are trusting if you really forgive the person you would not testify against them you really forgive then you let him come back to the house to live with you so you know him know the story does but has been on his wife he ends up getting restraining order he's removed from the house and then some good meaning christian says well you know what you really need to do is really forgive him and let him come back in even though you and him will be violating a restraining order but a good christian always trusts after they forgive is that true that's a lie forgiveness does not require a person to trust someone who has shown their own trustworthy i'm sorry that again forgiveness does not require person to trust them who has shown their own trustworthy if the person has shown that they can become trustworthy can you trust them repentance i got caught and i confess op this is what i did and i ask you for forgiveness that sorrow that leads to repentance the other one is i got caught and the only reason confessing is i got caught and i don't want to pay the price there's a difference but if a person is that a true heart of repentance then i believe we are to give some trust to them but i believe it has to be limited sorrow that leads to repentance that there will be salvation salvation means more than going to heaven salvation means walking in freedom it means walking in victory so when you truly repent there is a victory that comes with that but again and as the consequences so happens all the time you have is the judge judicial system all the time is that people oh i i got caught some sorry i got caught god determined to make you suffer anybody ever heard that one ok god has the you know he has the baseball bat he's going to beat you up then so there's a lie out there that god is a wrathful god determined to make you suffer have all the consequence you had so who who again is the bad guy the victim and so the that lie that you know what if your fog god is punishing you because of this this is the this is this you are dirty in the eyes of god anybody ever heard that one so the here's how this happens the perpetrator to be and will do this is your unclean you don't clean so nobody on once you so you just stay with me that's abuse or what about this is because of your past you can't ever get married who would want to marry you after all you've done that's a lie from the pit of hell that god can't work on your behalf god can't be favor for to you because of what you done anybody read in the bible some people done some terrible things that god forgave them that's an example for us there is no punishment for god for those who are victims if your victim god isn't punishing you guilt shame embarrassment commendation experience but victims comes from the devil or a person that believes the lies of others you're not on claim because of the sexual abuse done to you the physical abuse or whatever may be done to you that knows what it says  shame embarrassment and condemnation comes from the devil or yourself it doesn't come from god if you're a victim of something has taken place in life and you're feeling guilt that's coming from you the devil or the lies that you believe if you're feeling condemned because of the things that have happened to you that's either coming from the words coming from you is not coming from god that or see god wants to bring killing and deliverance to victims not punishment now that me we can place judgments upon herself we can curse our self because of the things we've done now listen to what i want to share with you if you've done wickedness and you done evil are there consequences  ok but does god have to punish you this is a lie that comes from christianity at times if you sin then god's going to punish you let me tell you something if you sin there will be consequences that your punishment that god does now to do then so this give an example if i turn around and i break into houses and i commit ten burglaries and i get arrested and i go to prison will there be consequences so why does god have to do anything why does god have to punish you the system itself is going to bring punishment your choices brought the punishment so here's what happens is then you got the good meaning christians turn around say will see you're so evil years so wicked god is punishing you now do you think that transforms the person you know it does transform your transforms them into a person that wants nothing to do with a god that hates them so much and so out of that there's this false lied this false concept that if you are a good person and bad comes your way you must have some secret sen that comes your way and god's out to expose the secret sayin is that all that a lie yeah guess what ken got exposure secrets then yes but does that mean because you suffer that you must have a secret sin so we're going to do is paul you know he's going through a tough time right now so paul there's something you're doing that's then tell us w and if i listen if i do do evil the consequences i get are going to be the consequences of doing evil and god doesn't have to do anything now finish with this listen didn't come from an environment of churches and written in a christian home like that but there's plenty of churches in christian homes that have that kind of mentality out of that god can withdraw all his favor from you and allow you to pay the consequences that is not the wrath of god you know what the wrath of god is he destroys you he kills you he wipes you out is there the wrath of god is there a god that's wrathful absolutely is there going to be the wrath of god against unrepentant sinners at the end of a absolutely there is that part of god but we're living in a time where god is doing no so god is going to do everything he can to do something to bring us to him and sometimes he does this and lets go of all that's going on and let you suffer the consequences for what purpose to bring you to a place of repentan if you perform that's the lie if you will perform god gives you favor it's a lie listen this is this is i mean by it's a lie it's our concept of what favor me so if you perform good enough god gives you favor does god want to give favorite adults who honor him absolutely but what does that favor look like what defies a tell you the reason that's a lie because if you love god and you perform is that performing that's the lie he works that's the lie but here's the other part our definition of proof of favor so if i perform good enough i have the favor of god well what if i'm doing all that i can to perform good enough for god and a bad thing comes my way why i must not really love god because a pastor says if you really if you do all that god wants then you have god's favor you'll get rich you'll get a blast you'll get a favor of god everything great going to happen your life and i'm loving god with all my heart and isn't happening what do i start to believe i must not really be a christian i must not really be love god what does that get you into trying to always perform be good enough for god be good enough for god be good enough for god by your why your behavior your actions guess what we all fall short and you'll be into all defection is bondage that's miserable and by the way the favor of god is to give you grace to do whatever god has for you to do and to be in the to live so what if i just say if you really love god you will get the favor of god and he may allow you to be a martyr nobody wants to hear that one but that's the truth the truth is if i really love god and i'm sure with all my heart he may give me the opportunity to  cancer to come my way second be a testimony i have cancer nobody wants to hear that one who is that the truth that's the truth now listen i said he may allow you to have cancer i didn't say if you really love god he may put cancer you so you can give a testimony no god doesn't put cancer on people who love him but does god allow it obviously because there are people who really love him and they have cancer and they had a pastor in god's hands what does that mean don't waste that trial when it come use it for growth because if you don't grow from the trial guess what you just waste the trial and guess what you get to have another try to master it you need to know jesus christ your lord and savior jesus said behold i stand at the door and not going to be one hears my voice and opens the door i will come in robust and thirteen's as river calls upon the name of the lord will be saved johnson says you must be born again  accept jesus christ as your lord and savior you can go to there is hope to god or there is there is hope t v dar or and we have information frequently asked questions about christianity the let you know step by step but accept jesus christ you lord people love life let me tell you something that if you love god and love people you will love life you know why some people don't love life they don't love god or they don't love people if you don't have got you don't love people don't love like let me tell you something else when you love life you will love people you will love god it goes both ways and out of it if you have a love and a passion for god and you said god i just love you with our my heart thank you jesus so you've done so much for me but i just love you you have what can i do for you that's what happens when you have true love yeah what can i do you love me how can i love you you know god is going to answer love people that's what he's going to say he's going to say love me because you already love him anybody know that the greatest commandment love the lord thy god with all your heart soul mind and the second greatest commandment is what love others that yourself so loving god least loving people let me tell you if you love god or i love you so much what can i do he says i want you to love this person over here i want you to love this person over here i want you to do this for this person here our star you start loving people start loving got you don't think that you ask them fire in you you know that you have some love in you that you start loving life you're excited about life you have been listening soon there is so with pastor richard over through jesus christ we can live a victorious life seattle open door church located in period committed to loving god loving people and loving life seattle open door church once you don't know that regardless of where you've been or what you've done god loves you there doors are open to anyone and everyone their services are sunday mornings at eleven seattle open door church is located at six twenty five