we want to know do our loved ones live on and are they ok my guest role in calm twa is an internationally acclaimed medium channel speaker and bestselling author his healing message is that love is everlasting and continues beyond this physical plane positive energy starts right now so roland comes by welcome to positive energy thank you for only glad to be here with you as a pleasure to have you here i am so excited to have you on my show and to have this wonderful conversation and to introduce this to our audience thank you i'm glad to be here so your words and your work really resonate for me personally as well as professionally and i like the idea of really taking the fear and the mysticism out of the idea that that we continue the idea that we are souls the idea that there is life after death that we really are is a transition another step another experience so how did you come to this how did you get started what led you to this work i believe you started to develop your abilities in childhood i know that you also lost your mother and if those were key moments well i think in this you know it's been a forty four year process and i'm still learning how to be connected and stay connected to that spiritual space but when i was a kid ten years old my grandmother passed away and three days later she was in my bedroom i knew exactly what was going on i felt this incredible energy i saw this illumination this light at the end of my bed and somehow at that moment i knew that the ten year old kid that she was ok and i began to make it my business really to understand what happens to us what is the next step at ten and fifteen and seventeen and then through nursing school and right along to this moment of time almost like it was higher hardwired within you you know my mother said that when i was a kid she said oh god there he goes again chasing something around the room or talking to someone you know so it's always been a way of life for me that i would just feel defender jian need to share it and to experience i'm sure it was unique for you in some ways but is it also universal for for children in general are the children sense more they're more open to the energies presences that are with them but maybe that gets dismissed sure i think they are highly sensitive to energy because they don't have any filters yet you know as we go along on a journey someone says don't do that it's not right whatever and all these boundaries get put into place that forced us to step away from who we truly are and kids have an ability to really communicate and see things excellent sawyer's you stayed open i did you just open were open and continue to stay open and here you are as an adult and yes now you are able to express this in a much more pronounced way you know i think the reality of this is one of the discover was of a young child i thought that i was the only one or maybe i thought everybody was having these experiences but not really until i got much older that i realized i was having these experience base and nobody else was talking about it it felt normal to inaugurals you know my mother would look at me kind of strangely and and i'd say well mom don't you see them you know can't you feel them and she didn't and she didn't have those experience like i had so fast forward now tell us about the nature of your work in other words how does it what's your process in terms of how loved ones on the other side connect with you how spirits connect with you how you connect with them what does that look like i know people papers yes our signature for you yes i spend a lot of time in prayer meditation quietness and feeling that energy within myself and i know that once i feel that it connects me to something much greater much bigger than what's happening in that moment and then i start to hear stories and i write those stories on purple papers and i have for a very long time and then i go on the road and i find someone who knows we make a connection and something amazing happens they leave there with a purple paper or a message but you know what i really want to share with you michel is that i don't think you or anybody else needs a medium though because i think all of us have that ability within ourselves to make a profound and powerful connection to the afterlife i think it's an each person and my job is to show you that that experience still exists that your loved one still exists so you are in the middle of that you don't necessarily need to be you're saying we really don't need you that we all have this ability it's something natural something that we're all born with what's the what turns it off what turns it on that's the right term yeah what's the key you know what's what's the ingredients that goes into every all of us being able to connect with those we love well you know it takes work it takes a commitment it takes not listening to the voice of someone saying you can't do that or that does not exist it really takes that moment of getting within yourself and listening to that inner a voice that connects like that i believe connects us to everything and if everything exists then our loved ones must exist there as well and if they're there then we can have some kind of conversation some communication that will inspire us in some way that will move us along in some way so it's not going to come through our intellect it comes through a deeper place their heart just going to say it are in total so if we have practices on a regular basis that move us into that deeper place we're just going to be more available and recognise it it's important to sit quietly to be in that space to go into the heart because the heart is really the communicator of all these things and when you're in that space it's very powerful and profound you come back to who you truly are and what exists for you it's all in you it's all in you it's everywhere so i'm sure people want to know more like how how how do i do it you know me you teach people little bit how to develop the ability of mediumship and is it that you teach them meditation techniques good question or i mean prayer is something we can do in our own way or connecting with our heart and you know i think every student i have ever taught i said the one thing you need to master first is silence you know we live in a world where we need instant messages we get texts we get facebook messages all these things are happening very very quickly around us and we have lost the ability to sit quietly and to be in that silent space that space is the catalyst for that spiritual voice speaking to us and filling us with whatever it is that we need we're so to learn how to communicate with that space is to really get within yourself and allow that voice to speak to you i do it every day you probably do it every day your viewers probably do it every day they get into that space and in that space is where all this amazing energy is so let's let's talk about love yeah let's talk about let's talk about love do that because i'm my gathering is that that's the main message that our loved ones want to convey to us that they still love us that they are love that we are love and have you found that there is sort of the main theme that our love ones come through to convey to us when you work with people you know the main point is always that it's based in love even in relationships that went that great it's still based on love right because at the end it all comes back to love you know the skeptics say well it's a little  fact of the matter is it is about love and that's what we all want to know we all want to know are we loved did they love us do they know i still love them is you know is we still remembered are we still connected and when we have these conversations something happens it opens up the heart in the soul of the person who's receiving the message can i just share a little story about this please i was at an event recently and there was a woman sitting in the back row and all she wanted to do was to be not to be seen and to be seen and the minute i i brought about her husband who was named david something changed in her and when i brought the words that i was hearing and feeling something even greater changed within her and by the time the message was offered to her there was one tear coming down her face and she came to some realisation that no matter what happened between them that no matter what happened at the time of his passing that that the love that they had the love that they shared was still there it was still part of it in some way it was so remarkable to see her sitting there and by the way she lost a loved one a nine eleven so her loss not that we should compare one loss to another because that really isn't fair to me but it was awful for her and but she had that moment of coming to a place of knowing that maybe he is still there that he's still part of me and that's what the end result is of all of these channeling and messages and moments with people it brings you into that into that feeling place yeah that you really are the catalyst for of course love and loss go hand in hand in some way yes you do need to have loved first have the experience of loving someone to experience loss yeah look i think about this with my mother's passing i loved her and credibly as we all do are probably are people that have gone and if i didn't have the opportunity to love her as much as i have that loss would not have impacted me as deeply as greatly but what it taught me was wow was i lucky  incredibly lucky to have that experience in my life and made me the man that i am and and so there's a moment of realizing all of these things when you get one tiny little message or you have a moment from from that spiritual place so let's expound on that a little bit and talk a little bit more about grief because i know you do this kind of healing grief work goes hand in hand with what you do as a medium we know that grief is is  human experience it's a human emotion it's normal it's natural it's necessary in many ways so how do you what do you say to bring comfort to people when they are really in the throes of grieving how do you bring it all together reminding in their loved ones even though they can't see them are still with them how do you help them with with their their grief well you know the first thing is i let them talk and just let them say what they need to say and most of the time my words re we may think they are is they're having the opportunity to share the depth of their grief so the first thing is really letting them say what they have to say to be part of their grief versus walking around it and avoiding it so we step right into it and then we walk into that experience brings out a lot of emotion but i think what the first thing that happens is they get a chance to say what they really feel you know and i think that sometimes that does not happen we don't have the opportunities to say how grief makes us feel i remember somebody coming into the funeral line when my mother passed away and said oh what are you crying for i said well i'm a fifty year old kid that lost the one person who knew everything about me who knew everything about my existence here and that is why i'm crying you know and that was my grief and my and my really my sorrow but when i spoke it when i shared it it began to ease began to lift a little bit and i think that's really important it's a great first step to write because many people are not comfortable with their own emotions or continental with other people's intense emotions you know just being a safe space for someone to talk and just be connecticut there was fifty sixty people in the room there was a woman sitting there and she had waited her whole life and she was only twenty five or twenty six years old but she waited her whole life to get a message from her father and she had never ever expressed her grief so i walked up to her and i said whatever it is that i said to her and what came out of her voice out of her soul was excruciating to hear and what was so amazing me show is that the audience the people in the room stood up and put their arms around that kid that was the power of that moment that's the power of love and so here for the first time of this young woman who desperately mr a father had a chance to release this anguish and then to receive what this audience did for her i will never forget her i will never forget her have you to feel what a wonderful experience to be able to witness and really be a part of and to see the power of the collective i got everybody is a wind was amazing one minute and everybody's hearts are open and it really really makes us realize how united and how similar we all are and that in our experience so true it was so amazing to see them just all stand united and you know my heart open to humanity on that day even more than it ever had been because people just stretched across their own grief in their own pay pain to be of support i love when the best in us comes from yes so you know and have learned a lot about the after life when you first started or even now what sort of surprised you the most and what misconceptions would you like the most clear up for a little grey and i know there are misconceptions about the afterlife or assumptions but what did you learn and what can you share well i had a near death experience when thirty years ago which prompted all of these things and the thing that was most profound was that there wasn't a line for certain religious people were all of the same place you know it wasn't you go this way for one thing  experience so you know the idea that you know certain groups go in one direction the rest of us go in another direction yeah gone and it did and does not exist that way you know it was just that there was the oneness and a sense of unity that should exist here you know one of the greatest lessons of all even beyond that was that we can bring and this was the most profound moment we can bring that heavenly energy of the divine energy of that holy energy that sacred energy here right here right now we can bring it here we can remember that experience that's what happens when someone gets a message they remember the love they shared and it gives them the inspiration to take the step they need to take you know often i say to people i'm really not in the business of talking to dead people i'm in the business of talking to the living so that you can live without living yet is about living it's nothing more than living we make it much more complicated it's really a simple inquiry finite we make it very true very true but it is about living and that's that's the lesson in the experience from that then the near death experience the mediumship the messages is that we are supposed to live we live with what we have and we do the best we can and we live positively as your show says we live with that positive energy and you can even get there when someone passes on you can still move through your grief and come back to that space someone maybe one of the misconceptions that you're wanting to dispel is that there is such a huge difference there isn't such a huge difference between here and there right if there really isn't a here and there maybe it is just one field or one vibration is just about showing up in one form or another have you have you heard that from those who are no longer in their physical form in their physical bodies well i can tell you that when i had that experience thirty years ago it was it was just there was i didn't there was a sense of ascending and moving an energy but when i finally got wherever i was going i was there anyway it was like it was already there was all here it's present all we have to do is tap into that energy and that's how it goes is more like like a dial like kind of like clicking into a radio dial and i was kind of think of it that way i don't know why you know that's interesting i used to always told a story that you know the mediumship is like having in the old days i had a nine hundred ninety four pontiac bonneville with valar seats red car gorgeous car me show right i turned the car on and the fan tan it would come out from the back trunk somewhere and all of a sudden i was hearing all the radio stations everything was in was accessible to me you know i think there's a similarity to that that the minute we get into that space all of it is accessible to us even our loved ones that have passed on a love that that makes it much more you know much more you can think about it a little bit you know and organize it in your mind more than it's not such a quantum leap yes here and there are people always look up when they say have i know it and i think that's one of those misconceptions of the well that we know to to a heavenly place i think it's just all here yes you know heaven is here it's here it's and heaven is in the eyes of my twenty four year old daughter it's in the love of my friends it's in the dogs that greet me when i come home it's in the obstacles of my life in the joyful moments of my life it's everywhere and it's an everything yeah that's good so let's ground this even a little bit more from this wonderful esoteric conversation that i love into how does believing truly believing in an afterlife and that everything is really about love and that we don't aren't really ever separate how can that in a practical measurable way impact our lives positively well look we have an opportunity here no matter what your experiences are to step back into that space of love you know a few months ago i did this service at a church every year i get asked to do a christmas sermons kind of thing i go couple of hundred people show up and at the middle of the service i said stop everyone get out your cell phones and right now i want you to call somebody and tell them how much you really love them i don't want you to text that i don't want you to send them in an e mail i want you to pick that phone up and so all of a sudden people are taking their phones out and a room of two hundred people there you can hear all these little tiny whispers of people saying you know i just want to and i don't then hear all the conversations but again a young woman she's probably twenty something years old came up to me and said this she said i want to say something to you she said you know what you just did for me and i said i don't know i ask you to call someone and tell them you love them and to share your emotion to bring everything to the present moment she said i called my father i haven't talked to him in ten years i was afraid to tell him that i loved him what i felt and she said you're not going to believe this he said i love you back it's about being here in this moment through our grief through our loss through our joys through everything and being present in our lives i know it's a bit clichd we say present all the time but it really is being here right here in this moment and that's i guess the beauty or the the message or the gift in loss and in death that it provides contrast it provides what seems like the opposite for us it reminds us about what's important and you're right it's easy for us to say well of course i love my loved ones and sure i tell them or i write write it in a note but i see we really tell them and be present yeah and tell them so what's the action behind the words what are you doing to give those words color and energy and vibration what are you doing to expand that and bring it all to the present moment can i just share another story with you my mother just before she passed i walked into her rehab room and she was in a glow i've never seen this woman in a glow before and she had of light around her and i thought ok something's happening and she said roland and she went like this are not a nut she said she said they all came to me last night and you were right it is about love and she told me this very grand story of how her family that she had long for for years and years and years were around her and they said to her they said you know what i don't want you to worry when i pass she says and i'm getting emotional telling you this i don't want you to worry she says the want you to worry about it to the because just before i go they're going to take my hand and they're going to show me where i need to go next and they're all going to stand around me and you won't have to take care of me anymore so she said what are you going to do when i'm gone i said i have no idea mom you never left before i have no idea what i'm going to do but i'm going to do everything i can to love to love you to love my sister to love my life i'm going to do everything in my power to love everything about who i am and where i am and she that's all i can ask and a few days later in the quietness of my arms she passed away i am certain i am so certain michelle that she took all that love all those energies all those memories that we've collected over the years and took them with her on her journey because somewhere in the next place somewhere beyond here our paths will cross again and all that pain that existed will no longer be present what will be present is all that love and that energy and the joy that we have felt in our life together the awful message in that way to honor or demonstrate our love for our loved ones those who are with us now and not here in our physical form is to live our lives yes fully and participate in a life and live through love i mean that is that's the way it is i've been doing this for forty years it started when i was ten i'm in my fifty's i've never heard the other side say to me be depressed right don't eat supper don't go to work make your bed make  say live love and if you get a little down it's ok that you get a little down it's part of the human experience that's part of the experience when you love someone that you experience that loss and grief and and  my mother was a great teacher for me in those last moments of her life telling me exactly what i needed to hear beautiful it was very beautiful very beautiful partner with you because obviously she i'm sure she's teaching right alongside he is and sharing and giving yes she is she is and that's the beautiful part so i'm sure hearing your words people want to reach out to you yes how can they find you on the internet and give us the names of your books sure you can find me one breath and another begins beautiful thank you so you're going to be at my center yes even the lingle probably air after that after cardless i'm thrilled as well that you're going to be holding a mediumship gallery at my center and certainly hope  that that will continue i hope so is there a final message that you'd like to sort of channel or offer to our audience a message of hope for than well what i want to say to you is not to lose sight of the love that you've started and in the dark days in the heavy days go back inside inside somewhere and find that memory where you found that love that you've had with each other and hold on to that because that will move you through your grief and your loss and somehow give you the encouragement so take one step at a time go easy on yourself allow those the memories of love to come back when the time is right and then take your next step and if you