of the show and i am thrilled to be here for part two with my friend and colleague tim jackson of tim jackson talks and we have opened the door to some really fantastic information and  people need to hear and know about so in our last show we talked a little bit about him background and kind of journey in life which all of us have right and we're all taking the different turns and twists and are we holding someone's hand while we're doing it and we are getting some guidance are we paying attention to what's going on in life and are we making our own decisions and and i think you know just talking about focusing on  who we can impact in this world and who we can help is is also a big basis of our conversation so so tim speaks middle schools rate high schools colleges  also on the corporate penn yale and let's talk a little bit since we started to weigh up who today's team is and why they're so fantastic and amazing let's talk a little bit about what you talk about when you want schools sure character education yes so she's going to ask okla do you customize if there's an issue absolutely absolutely yeah and so what it comes down to is what does the school itself want me to focus on whether it's one of those four things i also have some programs on leadership but for the most part what i what i get incredibly passionate about is what i found is that of all the anti programs out there there's not a single anti that a kid wants to listen to that there's not i mean i see it with my own daughter when i tell her not to like stop jumping on the couch she jumps higher you know today the teachers the administrators they get it they see the entire idea that whatever we focus on builds that if there's a school with a drug problem and you talk about the drug problem then there's going to be more drug problems if there's an attendance problem if there's a bullying problem if there's a good whatever that problem is that problem grows more and more the more they focus on where it is important to identify that there is an issue but to come up with a solution and to focus claim that evolution so when i come into a school i i open up with about seven or eight minutes of let's laugh at him and figure out what's silly about what's going on in m into talking about what my life was like what it was like for me to be a teenager too to go ahead and tell a story that's twenty years old then they can resonate with them today to see that not much has changed you know i had i did have your buds i had headphones on and you know they i had yeah the video games didn't have the type of graphics that they had back then but i was playing video games and i was still worried about the girls and whether or not they were going to call me or who was going to dance with me at the dance like all that stuff was going on in my life yeah and to connect with the kids on some of the real struggles that i went through the divorce of my parents my struggles with  drug and alcohol abuse you know what went on in my life that i chose to focus on it out point and where that took me to the severity where the level of detail that i go into is always going to differ whether you're talking to a middle school or a college ranger certainly can open up a lot more opportunities when you're speaking at a college i was at william patterson university last week and i mean i was amazed at how raw i was able to get and how much they wanted to know you know like what it didn't almost matter what you were saying and what somebody else was saying back people just want to be heard here they want to have something to say they want to be recognized for what they're saying they want to be heard yeah  i guess that's just the system yeah and that's an age old lesson that i learned as soon as i got into sales fifteen years ago that god has given me one mouth in two years for a reason yeah and the same holds true with with with teens today  you know so so after i go into what's gone on what my difficulties were what my hurdles were the obstacles that i faced i talk about like how i came out of that you  know and my story isn't much different from anybody else's who's who's had troubles in the past who ends up finding that the way out is is is by owning up to who you are identifying who you are recognizing that and making a decision to make a change and what i found was that that change not only had to go on in my life but that it had to go on in the lives of other people that i came in contact with that i needed to store being a real giver out there or that i needed to be somebody who would make a difference in the lives of other people and i and so i talk about my experience with that and i also couple it with the science behind giving the the amazing things that go on in our brains when we reach out to somebody who is in you're familiar with that feeling to the teens and i talk about the oxytocin that's released when they when they level up in a video game when they shoot a winning basket and i say when they shoot a winning basket because i have no idea what that we all have our own reference book so you know i try to tell you i think if they get a really good right if they learn something new if they learn something new with their theory or they get excited about it i get excited about it humans as a species get excited about learning learning new things and more than anything our brains helping people it's how we're genetically connected to one another and designed to help one another so that we can continue to advance as a species it's i'd trail out of the schools i i come back very often the schools will have me back into a lee a lot of them follow me on social media and instagram and and all that and you know you'll see the comments of what happens when they start giving what happens in their life and what's really really going on inside their minds and then when i when i finish my talks you know i want to make sure that i'm leaving a lasting impact so i would end up spending the next you know or the last five minutes in a session i would end up spending five minutes in a session just doing everything that i can to push them to make the effort right you know to inspire them dying to believe in it yeah and you're saying well i'm not venting it's right it's right where yeah there are potential i mean there is there is special stuff inside each one of these kids that are made of star like before that there wasn't a them so they're here for a reason and when you look into a child's eyes and you tell them that there are important people leave it they believe it and they believe it from the very earliest stages my son is eleven months old and when i fly him around the house chasing after my five year old daughter he puts his arms out because he's like i'm going to get her he thinks that is superman has no idea who is superman is bill but he thinks that it's him and it right and so you know as we age a lot of times we forget that we do we build up these walls we start to hear other people's doubts we start to live by what other people think that we're supposed to lose by and i want to make it clear to these last talk with the mentors that you had in your life in the important people that you had there you know at that left or right turn where you're like i don't know i don't know i don't know which direction to go and i don't know you know if i can do it and you have somebody there to take your hands of course you can do it and i think that is so critical because there is whether whether we're kids or adults sometimes people don't have those people on their journey and their belief system becomes they have really never been able to do that in yeah i got that that in stone and they make up their story this is my story you know i don't you know it's as simple as i'm going to the gym because i don't have time for that is that really the story you're telling yourself every day to make it ok and if i to is to change their belief system and and see who god made us to be ok which is just beautiful magical and unique right and i think when we get inside that from an authentic perspective and we really ourselves see who we are seeing you know seeing you in action i've had the privilege of of doing but then also thinking about this again in relation to like my world that i work in on the corporate from and seeing people suffer you know is just a lot of suffering there's thirty percent of the heart attacks on monday morning is increased by thirty percent between the hours of six to nine a m in this country because people don't know what they're doing they're going to something that they're not in love with and you know what's amazing is they aren't saying like you said in our show like don't do that yeah don't do that don't do that find a way to love what you're doing or change yeah and there's a path right i love it find a way to love which are doing right now find joy whether it's your your cup of coffee in the morning focus on your joy focus on some simple pleasures they're going to get you right through the paint by numbers of the day yeah for some people if that's going to be your inspiration care plan make your plan for what's next yes far too many people saying ok well you know i'm really i'm not completely miserable let's make sure i'm not completely miserable people will change often intil it till the fear of intl doing what they're doing is more painful than the fear of change absolutely there's a good story i heard of a dog late in the corner who was laying on a nail to go and do what we really really want to do yeah yeah but you know tony robbins talks about the great pain great pleasure same thing what is the lever is going to be there's an amazing opportunity and i can't think of anything else i can go for it even though i'm afraid or getting up on monday morning is so painful that i cannot do this anymore and it's it's how do we how do we connect with the people in between you know yeah and what i find in in addition to that order furthermore i should say is that when i decided to make a change and i decided to start following that voice in my head the voice that just said what was that voice when i start to follow what my dreams are the universe starts to open up for me things just start to go my way when all of the sudden i figure out oh my goodness i'm not going to be able to do this  on my own i'm going to need and we need help i'm going to need somebody to be there to guide me people start showing up in my life and i go wow did you get here or you know and over and over again i mean it's not that it's going to be easy the entire time there will be hurdles and obstacles and and opportunities for growth but at had the same time if i stay were that the universe has a way of forcing me  forcing me out of my comfort zone in order to do what we do i think of my first speaking experience so i've been volunteering with with pass it along for a number of different years running a youth conference over and over again and for a couple of years the c e o diane taylor who we both know had come up to me and said to him why don't you be the speaker and i said no you know why i want to do that that's who i want to become but this is just something that i want to do for you guys i don't want to make this about me and i would hear my in the back of my head like now tim you supposed to do this and one year we hired a speaker to come in and we got a phone call we had planned all summer long to have this big conference a summit of eleven different high schools to talk about volunteerism and the night before we got a call at six thirty at night from the speaker who we had hired that he had to cancel for nine a m the next day and all of my complaining about moaning and doing everything that i could to go ahead and make sure that i wasn't the person to get up there came crumbling down had no speech prepared i had nothing to do i had i had ten hours to come up with a forty five minute presentation all the while having to run a dry run of an entire day so we were rather limited i also like to sleep so i mean i had very little time to do it what i found was when i showed up that morning i was completely calm i knew that i was doing exactly what i was supposed to be doing and it went off without a hitch later on that day i called up the speaker who had to cancel and he had gone through something that was very difficult for him so we we certainly understood i said i like this i want to do this he pointed me in the direction of  u speaker university general by the name of josh ip who's a mentor of mine and i took this online course it started to show me about the business of speaking and over the course of the following year more and more doors stirred open for me and the more more i talked to people about these doors opening the more more doors third open for them and just the flow of the universe started life became easy for me not going to be able to get by on your personality the rest of your life know and the bigger the matter is you know today educators administrators that we in the legislators on board to we would start to see that they're all for identifying the values of emotional intelligence you know this push for social and emotional learning is is really really grabbing ahold of doing some work with the united way of northern new jersey and they've got this you're the parent alliance and to see what they do inside the schools that they work with is remarkable yes for a lot more about that well i mean for what i understand they've you know they've they've done studies on what happens when when you get kids to to start talking to one another you know they are your kids are often over schedule they hear people complain that they're studying just for tests not to actually learn and what they've done is they've they spent time with second graders and spent time with second graders every morning giving them that job right so that when they asked where is the second grade teachers spend ten minutes every morning asking mckay it's what's going on in your life what they found was that test scores went up by percent i mean these are remarkable numbers guess who tasks there were marketable figures and the fact that the education system today is seeing that opportunity and doing what they can to push towards that rather the n push towards what can we do in order to make sure that that our kids test well yeah but but so that exercise of asking what's going on in their life is also a facet of them seeing one another right here because we talk about this again with adults you know in a business community where people they have a level of intolerance for one another and they're not seeing each other you know it we just you just see it in public you know somebody who is in the line who decides running a chakka nerve fourteen people in line behind them and you're you know first second maybe you're irritated by it but you know seeing that person and knowing that you know maybe that's all they have with them or whatever having some modicum of tolerance and understanding and caring we're talking about the person who cut you off on the road are they you know who knows what's going on for them in that car in their life and so when we started to get to know those things a coworker is suffering with a dying parent a child in rehab i mean the list goes on and on the stuff that we're walking around with and we see for two seconds then you're also like oh ok ok and what i love is what happens them because it's fantastic organization or they were boll who is just amazing it's really about kindness and it is really about exactly what you're saying recognizing for two seconds what's going on for all the impact that you're having crossed the board and from a corporate perspective just give me another quick snapshot of of what you talk about on the corporate and the corporate front and we were talking about before the customize it so there's something going on in the organization you know hey and five minutes ago we thought we were sold and so we kind of crumbled as a set of human beings and now ok wait we're not being sold anymore w kind of back on track for a mass i don't know do you do you ever focus on specific things or sure that's a great question so for for one thing the the opener that i do to connect with my audience is the same whether it's middle school high school college or not it's what it's always amazing is you know working with middle school students is incredibly rewarding incredibly difficult it's that stage of life we're very often a middle school student to find themselves worried about if i laugh now is he or she going to think that i'm laughing at the wrong time right when i give the exact same opener to a group of fifty year olds at a sales summit in elizabeth new jersey the reaction is overwhelming you know just to give them ten minutes to laugh during the conference is usually quite helpful yes you  know and then what i do before each program is going to be to identify the pain points that their company is going through whether it were al whether the low moral is caused by confusion about their job security whether it's something that's gone wrong in the media whether it is something that's gone wrong with the product and sometimes it's just interpersonal communication difficulties that each organization is having so a lot of times appearing on the size of the group whether it's fifty or five hundred is going to determine whether i'm going in there running workshops where they can play one on one with each other right or if i'm just going to go through the direction that the company wants to be headed and does that mirror the direction that they want to be in a lot of times they're the exact same thing and people just don't realize it you know it's so easy to concentrate on our difficulties on our differences  on what separates us when the bottom line is we are more similar than we were there is over and over and over again and anything that you can do to align a group of people under the same mission will will incredibly increase productivity and happiness and a sense of purpose which is what we're all thriving for our tomorrow well i would and he thank you so much for today for two shows i hope you all have enjoyed one more time how people get ahold of you yes thank you so you can log on to tim jackson talks dot com and all of my information will be on there as well as a short demo video so that you can check out some of my work thank you so much