following program is sponsored by seattle open door church yet all open door church is committed to loving god loving people and loving life our doors are open to whomever no mass required seattle open door church looking at the topic of sexual harassment in the biblical approach as we've looked at the appearance of evil today we're going to look at examples of what can be seen as an appearance of evil i pray that we look at our own life and ask yourself is that something that we project is that something that we do is it something that we've tolerated in the past and the father god we would be people that would take a stand that the say that as christians we do not tolerate sexual harassment and that we choose to not participate in that and that father god we can be a light and a witness in our community in jesus name amen so every week we've been talking about certain things sexual harassment came from the news and all the stuff that's on the news about  the way because laws are going to be humans are going to be people that are broken who those who are fall and and they're going to do it so what have we been covering is some ways to prevent sexual harassment happening to you and i know that you can't stop somebody from sexually harassing you less you don't have a human being around you because you can do everything right can't you and get somebody still violate you yep ok and so we talked about how to do the best you can to stop sexual harassment and then we've talked about what you can do to make sure you're not a person that is a perpetrator of sexual harassment and we're going to talk about today is the parents of evil we talked and if you follow the principle of no appearance of evil you're probably going to be in a seen as sexual harassment sexual abuse we also look at actually behavior that can fuel sexual harassment and sexual abuse so i got to put a disclaimer again if  men is walking down the street with no clothes on i'm taking it even to the extreme or that i've ever done and she's walking down the street with no clothes on in an alley at two o'clock in the morning where there's a bunch of bunch of gangsters is it her fault if she perpetrator is that stupid ok it's stupid ok so as a share some things and i say behavior that can fuel sexual harassment no way am i saying so if a woman does these certain they have permission to sexually harass or do you know so don't twist what i say because in the past i've covered this subject i have had some people write me some very nasty notes saying that you're part of the problem because you're giving a rape mentality and your stance ok for men to rape women if they dress a certain way have you ever heard me say that ok video i never said that i make a disclaimer now because i'm going to share some things that if you misinterpret it you can read it that way ok number one sexual harassment sexual abuse behavior the following is sexual harassment when the person victim has not given any hint or made any statement that they're interested in a sexual relationship they have not given any permission to go down the road of sexuality soul if a were eight men are women can be victims is normally women but men or women could be victims we're going to use the examples as women mainly to prove a point but if we're going to give examples of somebody saying or doing things that could be interpreted as sexual harassment ok in the midst of saying it this make it clear the person they're saying it to has given no hint about in the about sexuality so you understand our setting this up so there's a female at a workplace where she may be she's never talked about anything sexual she's not made in a new windows of sexuality she's not made not any signs that she is a loose woman or anything else there but he's got the scenario going ok a new windows not actually making sexual remarks but potentially hinting at the topic of so this give some examples of a man walks up to a woman and he says your blouse is very revealing but would you take that as would you take that as some kind of a hint why would some maybe there's no hint at all but does it make you say why are you saying that to me when you wonder about that ok number two eugene sure fit tight you know i bring this up i won't say which one of you have done this because almost for sure in a room this size some guys probably done some of this ok but it's also that you know you maybe n s set benefit of the doubt in saying something but can somebody interpret it so i'm trying to help you out don't ever say that ok number three i sure like watching you walk why would you say that to a woman do you say to a guy you walk up to a guy why i like that i like the way you walk  place but me why would you say that so say you're you're going on a date is the first time you ever met this woman you know nothing about her and so you just want to meet up with there and you about that for a second so he does because come on i made some blatant ones there right pretty blatant what guy actually does that oh ok well i won't go down that road but then it says there's no place nobody but my place but me but if you say hey how much coming up for coffee if it's the first day this and i'm going to tell you some stuff that you guys are going to like if you haven't learned anything about christian dating or in the else the first time you see a woman should you invite a woman that is by herself and you should you invite her to your house first date  why would you do that should scare for does a scare should scare you if you're a christian i'm a christian man i want to serve god with all my heart my heart as sincere as can be i just want to have coffee at my house know i want to have my house i make good coffee much better than denny's does and i'm going to be christian easier to study the bible together so i say to her favor you know what first a first time you ever met her and you turn around you're you're having coffee adin he says a coffee at my house is much better than this pipe this is back coffee a denny's be amazed how you always liked and to get a woman with you and then all of a sudden you don't like it and you got better coffee and so then you turn around and you say hey coffee my place and by the way we can study the bible now they got that in there that should be safe and a woman says yes and she's a christian woman is she potentially going to be victimized we'll get to that later but yes ok so that's where it watch as a good bible study on sexual harassment by pastor rich so you say you know do it ok can we have both have good intentions yes ok but what happens when we sit next to each other watching the video how that normally you sit like this and then as the movie goes on what could happen ok and then and then you know you you just do this to see what happens but if you do this and there's not a rejection what it does going to happen and how many know it can go a lot for there we won't go any further right now today will do that tonight not right now so out of it guess what as a husband wife we can streams number six let's go have a few drinks after work and drop by my place ok so were all those and you window ok all those are innuendos and i would argue ninety nine percent the time there's only one purpose for those and maybe again who is a something that's innocent with the but if you don't want to be a victim guess what says to you hey you want to come to my place and she says yes did he get a bite yeah he was putting bait out and he saw what he could get at the pre birth trying to gets a bite from the buffer drinks they got a bite they got a bite they don't have to have a bite but he thinks he got a response so then he knows that he can go a little bit further game some injuries do not do the above they just jump right to the beat right to where it's at they don't even check to see if they've got a bite because what they're looking for you know they're looking for they're looking for the woman that you can be direct with and she responds because you want to work as hard disk a rebel does happen all the time ok number one that outfit is very sexy just went to another level  up blouses revealing says that up is very sexy why would you tell a single woman if you're a guy why would you tell her alpha to sexy can you tell me why you would say that i heard somebody say something i want to get her to take it off yeah never to the way you walk turns me on you just went to a whole nother level number three let's this fill up your lonely time from your spouse to have a good time at my place ok now i know that yeah this is true well we got some real people who came from the older ladies did you hear that they're they know they've been around the block they've seen what's happened see inappropriate contact the perpetrator may may may or may not make any comments instead they make inappropriate contact with the other person i now call than the victim because as one day when you make a little situations nothing you make a social mark when you physically touch at that point you truly cross the line because that when you make contact at that point you had to you had to be not only drink about what you're going to do you walk in and out now and i don't trust somebody that does that at all especially when they do it in a workplace or in a church or a barber someplace else because obviously whatever structure is they feel like it's ok to go to the next level so here's one they actually bump into somebody now can you accidentally bump into politician and so you shake his hand hi there mr solmes will be with you shortly and when you shake his hand you're trying to pull your hand away so the person that's on your hand if you have to pull your hand away are they becoming a point of sexual harassment now are there men who do with men that are just do that are there some in that just like to hold your hand and shake and art and i you know i don't like a lot of touch ok you know i don't like a lot to my guys ok and so when i shake a hand at the guy and that guy squeezes tighter and tighter tighter my hand  freaking me out right off the bat now does that mean he's doing the wrong no he just that he probably thinks i'm squirrely because i turn around and i barely hold on to your hand at all and i've pulled my hand away and he said well that's a wimpy handshake ok but somebody can be very sincere but if they're doing it with the opposite sex you have to start saying why would is there going on with that given appropriate hog's anybody ever been at a workplace or any of the women been a workplace we had a boss that seemed like he just was a hugger but he only like to hug certain women the ones that were really good looking he seemed to hug them but then hug the others so what should you think what would you think  to be a dud you decide ok if i don't know this woman and i'm green or red church and they say hi there and i say hi there what's your name oh my reputation's come they think that was mild ok let's show you because you're hispanic and because your culture is that you give everybody hugs but i can tell you and a conservative white culture this would be inappropriate never never  to men or women and at times he would do this to minara women ok ok but but but i knew him very well you know what he had nothing nothing that was going  as it was totally totally nothing wrong with what he was doing in itself that he had no wrong motives but how many know in a church setting with people visiting with all kinds of issues that may cause them a little bit uncomfortable ness visit some guidelines to be able to follow their hands accident may come in contact with certain body parts how does that accidentally happen put then you hear it on the news right here in the news i don't how can they be accuse me of anything and just i was just all i was all hacks of them was all you know i don't understand how i could possibly be a victim i don't know i mean we never had sex together i just had her sleep in my bed with me when we went on tours how about their eyes continue to look a certain body parts ok now i get on you ladies if you wear low cut blouse all the time there's a good chance a man is going to look at what is being exposed i have an image and has a woman that showing everything you can possibly see of her breast and that is as a little thing on in this says if you want me to look at your eyes stop show me everything else this get real well you know men should control their behavior has specially christian men christian men should control their behavior should they questions the perpetrator actually corners a victim in a room i know women who have been cornered in a room by a man by an employer the perpetrator socks the victim turns around and rather they're gone the god they go to the lunchroom they're at the lunch room where were they go the perpetrator actually assaults the victim in a very physical manner how many can see the progress didn't happen at the beginning there's other things that took place and i would argue a lot of times in workplaces that's how it happens it doesn't happen immediately is that the person is priming that person or seeing what that person is want to get away with and so we as a for followers of christ there should never be any of what we just talked about ever taking place and then next week we'll talk about behavior  shool the possibility of sexual harassment but this is best to ridge do you need to know jesus christ your lord and savior jesus said behold i stand at the door and not going to be one hears my voice and opens the door i will come in robust and done or and we have information on frequently asked questions about christianity we let you know step by step accept jesus christ you lord and savior encourage you to go to there is hope t v or that is there is hope t v dot org also let you know if you would like to talk to me person you can always give me a call toll free anytime one a six six one god future have it even before you feed your body is it any wonder that so many addicts see no way out but there is a fair haven for shipwrecks souls where lives are salvaged from ruins and on the road to recovery it's spotlight on chat with me today as richard dover director of her haven house i think the expression falling off the wagon is becoming more and more prominent referencing when people return to addictive behaviors after making initial attempts to get free sobriety always a struggle to maintain for former addicts whereas it is possible to overcome the state of for jodi of lives possible overcome but to be honest most of us won't take the do the work take the time the humble enough  godly counsel the less fragile is a rip their sobriety the recovery but it's a challenge because like many addicts will tell you is they're living in a forty nine year old body with about a thirteen year old mind and a foot structure there and i believe that's the thing that that the addict any person of any kind of addiction they need structure in their life and so that we're there the other thing is as we focus on those who want to come i think the biggest thing is that our program is how to change the way you think and our through jesus christ we can live a victorious life open door church located in theory and committed to loving god loving people and loving like seattle open door church once you know that regardless of where you been or what you've done god loves you there are doors are open to anyone and everyone services are sunday mornings at eleven seattle open door church is located at six twenty five south west one hundred forty ninth street in derian next to the southwest courthouse