she quit her job as a german c e o to follow her dream to transfer on other people's lives to live the life of her dreams she gave up her old life during this transformational process she found out the truth about friendship and welcome saskia this is something that i think a lot of people can relate to perhaps they've had a friend be treason and we're not just talking about childhood we're talking about into adult life so how is that something we can avoid or minimize remember when johnny depp got divorced from his ex wife amber and final even as about d s whose former ex wife she wrote an open letter to the public and said this you know what the ex wife of johnny depp said could have never happened because i'm a real friend and the way  that he has something you know he did something wrong could it not be they're curious in that moment i thought this must be the real friendship even though they've been together as a couple they still are friends so what i kept out of it and also what i you know learned out of my personal experience and from my experience as a coach let your friends be the way they want to be in the way they are no matter which development they're going through so we can change other people we have to accept people for who they are yes yes so that expectation is a source for disappointment yes yeah i can remember when you know i did my transform the process the way who i am today i lost quite a few friends because it was tough for them to see my own development do you think perhaps they were envious of you because they didn't have the courage for themselves to transform into maybe what they really would like to be yes yes or they were fearful they didn't want to pay didn't want to see you taking the risk that they wouldn't themselves do i think i was more kind of a mirror owed to them like i i was showing them their own problems without me by intention doing it  really think that and the deep down inside can be a cause of a lot of problems between different types of relationships i mean you could be envious of a spouse or in addition to a friend really do you think back to the impossible ye we possibly relate to this common everyday people have that how does this happen i mean so no one wants to be betrayed yes but you know regardless of the relationship and if it starts to happen how do you know if you should cut them out of your life how is that how do you help people with that were first of all my first advice is go check your friendship i'm by the meaning of do you always call them do you invest more energy in your friendships why are you with their friend go and check it out maybe you don't call them for a couple of i don't know weeks or hours and see what happened you always have the feeling that you are paying the bills for your friends like and if you see they're not investing the same energy in the friendship as you do i think it's time for the talk so good talk before you cut them off you have a heart to heart conversation yes me in p i develop my own values and i honestly speak them out to everyone i'm working with and everyone i'm in friendship with so when you say you lost friends yet did you feel that the other people stopped talking to you how did you lose them because i didn't want to realize that they might not have been my best friends because i was an easy friend i was cooking for them i was meeting up with them i was calling them asking them how they are but actually i was fearful of being alone without any friends so i did everything to hold them in my life so my recommendation would be get over the fear of being alone and be who you really want to watch aright so  show the world how beautiful you are what powers you have what skills you have so that's very cool great thought is how do we become more authentic for selves and for other people around us always try out the things you wanted to try out and do what you love and do more of it and then you see your friends like your good friends are like hey cool i'm happy for you they make you happy when you are happy and they're happy for you they're proud about yourself when you meet each other and you can tell what have done today like i'm coming home being my first t v so i expect my friends you know being there and like oh yes ask you are you gonna make it and the wrong friends they're like i don't know maybe you look that good so do you really want to do that they scare you you think they're discouraging you because they're jealous there is kind of this jealous feeling yeah but at those times when i lost my friends i didn't realize i didn't want to see it today it seems easy for certain types of people to make new friends i mean there's so many websites like meet up and these meeting websites what do you think about those to reestablish new friendships quality friendships how do you screen people how do you evaluate and discern the difference what first of all i really think you should be aware of your own values and in those moments where you start writing your own values down i have five written down your that i always can tell what i feel and the emotion behind that's why i do what i promise and i promise what i do and that i am spiritual so i expect my friends to understand that i was virtual person and this is one of my most the highest values so if it's and if i cannot show anyone my spirituality or talk about it even though they're not feel told them i'd understand you know that i'm interested in that they're my real friends so wait i think it just made me realize would you be careful of a friend if they make you feel like you have to hold back and uncomfortable about for example if someone's not spiritual you know and you are and you feel uncomfortable talking about it yeah maybe that's not a good friend for you there's maybe th that really stop lying to talk to me so i understand that completely and you just just compartmentalize the kinds of conversations you have one group of friends you don't talk politics of a group you don't talks virtual you talk music or business or i think a real friend let's talk about your experiences i had friends knocking on my door trying to hold me back to do what i'm doing now literally they do you and i do talk you out of it you have intervention and anti spiritual and you because i know that they kind of like it in that way like oh you have to be careful of course i have to be careful but if they would have known me for so many years they know that i'm curious that i want to try everything out i can and that i always like  can't land with my feet on the ground right right so if you've a positive framework for us your sense of curiosity sometimes gets you in a corner but you're willing to manage that handle that yeah so you're resilient person that everyone is resilient and  was a tough way that was really a toughie you know i'm sure he's heard this phrase i think about whether it's a misery likes company yeah but i think you can offshoot that the different things i think people get nervous when they watch someone else reach out of their comfort level and maybe it's not your comfort level i think it's their comfort level that when i had a point that's the point because i was mad that what we were just talking that i was there marrow the people who aren't you who hold back their spirituality of course they do the back room of the bout it i was the same thing but the biggest challenge i think some people have myself included here is i don't we sever a really romantic relationship that is becoming toxic you know sometimes people have a fear i don't want to change i don't know what my future is going to be like yeah and they stay because they are afraid of being alone and so did i mean friendship is sort of root cause for many things is unlined fear is a very common really mean well it's like that like except the fear need to be there when we believe something is going to happen but it's really not the truth we put it in our minds as the truth being alone is simply author lot that we are have it's not reality yet and the more you think or the more you are afraid of being alone to move the more you use friendly adult to give power to a thought switch our thoughts i use affirmations every minute i can in the morning when i put on my make up i wrote my informations on my mirror oh i see myself lately what's an affirmation it's like i only attract loyal people i have loyal friends it's like a everywhere your mirror in your bathroom you have little sticky is there a sign that this country is that are going to say so you're saying that to yourself that doesn't mean it's real but i also hear scientifically the brain doesn't know what's true or false you know if you talk to your own little voice yeah it's going to believe what ever you say and we are trained to focus on the negative things but we also got to focus on the positive things so there must be a balance right so the negative things you see everywhere you interact if you're going to the gym you want to train a muscle you need to train your brain so what else can someone write for seven minutes when i throwed there's a lot of power behind the number seven so the house the reason why you do seven minutes what if you work with num number and each number has a healing process behind so i don't have them all in my mind so you can take them up in it so we talked about getting rid of friends but how do you should you feel if you feel a friend pulling away from you but you're the one being dropped just let it bother you should you ask to talk to them what do you do about that it's always related to your own behavior so when you know everybody's telling you you read it everywhere at the moment your thoughts create reality but i don't think it's only the thoughts these are your feelings so the feeling of being alone calls us that the person you want to be close with pulling back again work with the fear of not being alone like work with them on trust i in a happy relationship i am not alone come over the feel let it be there and find something which is more important for you and also stepping outside of your own thought process to look at yourself from almost like a benevolent place yes we have our your being because sometimes people realize the way they really are coming off other people yes check that i mean how do you know should you ask other people the other way what do you think of me how do you know if you're coming off an odd way to someone else that might repel people that you're not even aware of i find of honest talks always and i know it's not easy but if you really go and look for conversation and you state what you think in a very friendly way no one will judge you for that and in my experience is like if somebody if somebody does something to me i know he does it not but for a coincidence but then i say hey look i feel you're pulling back from me and it doesn't make me feel full so please let me know what can i improve so give your friend permission to give you constructive criticism don't wait for it to happen at some random moment like they're going to share it and be honest and the most important thing mentioned the emotion behind it what it does to you it makes me fearful perfect support more things makes me feel yes so it's like i have them also in work i have a wonderful assistant and we were talking actually i thought from the same thing but she misunderstood well and a couple of years ago i would have called her like how could you not do that is and are you stupid or you know kind of those thoughts but then i approached her and i said listen i got that and that out of it and it really made me thought you are not willing to do this and in that moment that conversation was open because i stated honestly my emotion behind it and she said oh no that was not my intention we were just you know like having different opinions about it and i understood  correct way and i and that's also one thing about leadership make your weakness to your strength how wait i get asked this you brought up an interesting concept about leadership yes what do you mean by making a weakness a strength when you feel emotions behind someone else's behavior mention your emotion because express it communicates yeah and you're you've been a c e o for many more than twenty years so you know how to communicate with people professionally so now you're able to help and bring this to regular people on a day to day basis yet you know your coach right now yes what type of clients d i started in business coaching because i thought i'm coming out of business then my own personal spiritual development began and now i'm a life coach and quantum healer people you know like i want to have for example an open relationship or a normal relationship i mean what do you mean by open relationship i have to ask you to qualify that for you it is that concept talking about a partnership if you love somebody truly and honestly and that one is you  know state's like ok i can be in a relationship but i need to have other men or other women next beside you so it is an open relationship concept if you love somebody and you don't want to let them go that you say ok we stay in that kind of it was saying that relationship but you can have women or men exposito me and that works you say that works because if you are so fearful of losing that person and if you love that person so much  not right away he'll do it covertly behind your back yes and that's an honest way of the relationship but it's actually not the honest open relationship what bothers me and i really think it's important to mention that here it is a concept which is socially not except that i have so many people begging you know or asking me if i'm doing this open relationship thing my family my friends they will start judging i am afraid of telling them that i am actually living this i heard that is hollywood couples who are doing this and it's coming out there first they say they have marital issues and then it comes out they don't they have an open relationship yes but friends and family you know they still live the old conservative way and most people are not afraid of this open relationship thing they're afraid of talking stating that to other press how do you know if it's not for you as a couple when this is not a good idea maybe it's just the relationship group should be repaired but there's an issue after my personal experience and the experience of my coaching it depends what you're looking for i am convinced that for every one of us there is an assault partner where you then automatically start not thinking about any othe person next to that one you're in their relationship with but if you're just looking for a normal relationship it can happen right and that's a wonderful point to become beyond bitrate because then it's on as so  this leads us into you i think some people want to open relationship because you want someone else or maybe that's a segue into almost getting away from the other person you could end up feeling betrayed yes so how do you prevent in a general sense betrayed by a romantic partner because i think ron started to ask about this before i think you really can avoid this on your way to find your true partner how do you know when you have or haven't found your partner because you don't  multiple that true multiple people could be your soul mate but you still might help you on your way to find your true partner so how do you know when you have i mean if you're saying if that's all the for you don't think about it but there shouldn't be any couple in love so how do you know when that's the one versus yeah i know i'm of attrition when you're in love you immediately start feeling it and the funny or the really the strange thing is you're connected so you think one thought and the other part does it and that's one of those signs you finally realized you found your soul partner that is so interesting to me you also mentioned quantum healing yes what is quantum healing quantum healing is one of those tools explaining that you can work with spirituality or energy and help other people to achieve the life of their dreams other you know that they need energy for their project so me as a quantum healer if my clients approach me and say oh i want to find my soul partner or i want to have another relationship i sent them energy that they do the correct steps twats their healing and i think behind each problem there is a behavior so if i change the behavior the problem will disappear when you say healing do you mean healing the body or healing the spirit it is both behind each pane of our body there's a problem and this problem has been caused by wrong behavior and also the problem in your life caused by wrong behavior so it's the same concept what kind of behavior you have keen insight that you have a really great intuition a connection yet to to understand people their their spirit and how they behave and you do that with everybody is that just a natural gift you have or have you developed this i was born with it and when i was seven years old i was at the funeral my grandfather and i spoke to my grandfather and i didn't know at that time that if i say this other people will be surprised it up in various hospitals and people were doing surgeries with me wow well normally a parent would just see a little child like say that nothing ok their little made up world but they just kind of have that communication and that's your experience differ from what so many children's fantasy thought process i was gad because you know i also saw it you know and in my children's room there were russian soldiers running through and i didn't know that this was you know the sign of my grandparents showing me how they i ended up in hospital and there were twenty's you would end with their professor telling me that i'm not rotting and they tried to give me medication so as a child i learned to keep my mouth stop it's oppressive yes or at least externally so how do you help someone in this type of a coach mean so many people think that there's nothing provability can you just give us a couple examples because i love this i love the people don't pay enough attention to really their soul they always think about it a have the ok of that part of what i meant you can set not just verbal consent but energetic and said yes ok i need to feel you know if i have a name i'm immediately feeling if i can work with that guy or a woman or not or child do you find that someone's blocking you they might mentally say they want to help or give consent but spiritually it's still blocked and close yes and i would read it and i'm paying attention to i'm very high sensible i can sense it if i'm you know how far you can go so can you give us a few it's like it it's always a sign that you you know we're not expressing always what you what your thoughts on  have back pain you know i could help someone just from looking at the bag and i told him ok you have you know you're you you feel like you're still too small you're not in your own power there's some and then i can see somebody's whole bringing him down like small so you're you're able to move back in their timeline yes to the source of what created this physicality problem or emotional problem and then clearly yes what about if someone was an abusive relationship maybe for a long time or whatever the situation had traumatic incident happen to them that they're ready for an abuse are you able to help someone like anybody in the p t s d or something that holds them back in life from progressing permission but they're not sure what that's going to feel like what the actually the only thing i really do as a passenger i connect with the energy they need to get to open heart and then it's a process and energy healing are quantum healing i you have on your website discussing this with your yeah you can check my website and it's like you send me an e mail or you you you check my web site and then you let me know your topic i don't need to know everything right even though i know it but and then we walk on it and then you receive and achieve to do the correct steps like as he said you need an example i had a friend she was betrayed from her business partner and he promised her money b let her down without money and she had to start up company so no money at all so she caught me and i helped her and i said hey and no worries i give you the nitty that you know that you can do this alone and today she  convincing you they're mentally stronger so you don't come into your power and fight for something which is your right and i support with the energy those people to get what they really want that they're not being betrayed and why make them mentally strong and that's that you can give like an introduction situation we're just not out of reach but saskia thank you so much because if you're completely amazed by what you have to offer and i want to bring more yeah i guess i'm thankful that that's their website thank you so much making it over to the set of b m i crisis with one of you thank you for letting anything here thank you so saskia i'm amazed at how you can help people remotely out of the distance i'd love to hear anyone that's watching our episode to give us feedback if they communicate with you and let us know your their experiences and how everything went so while you have to see that yeah that's i welcome our audience to e mail us or and let us know yeah yeah