ather we come to you as king of kings lot of larger in the god that gives us the ability to forgive because you've forgiven us you're set the example that we can forgive a holy righteous almighty perfect god can forgive centers how much more should we be willing to forgive those of send against us and to be able to forgive our own selves for the things that we have done so as to draw upon the grace of christ to be able to learn the concept of forgiveness in jesus from god does everybody understand that if you understand no matter what you've done you can have forgiveness from god because wages crisis done and the next thing we're going to look at is forgiveness and inner healing through forgiving others and look at the concept to forgive others because some of this  a couple weeks ago but i wanted to get back on track get us refocus on it if you look at roman numeral number two letter a we need to let go of on forgiveness towards others for the wounds of sand that have been inflicted upon us did that just say that people send against us is that true so it isn't just that they do something that might be wrong they sinned against us and what we're going to be talking about is forgiving somebody who sinned against us we have a wound because of what somebody has done to us whether it's physically emotionally mentally and i'm going to give  of that took place in somebody's life and how do you deal with that and how many know that the way you normally deal with it is you don't deal with it in the way you normally do when somebody is going to do is that you hold on to bitterness resentment but  this see if anybody's had an experience like this this is a story of a disapproved story of a person i worked with him when he's doing ministry capitol hill it was a young lady who turned around and she was adopted into a family and that sounds like a good thing right family loves you because the adoption to their families they must love you she's adopted into a family but it turned out that it was a very abusive family and there would be a lot of torture going on one of the things that they would do on a regular basis is when they when she was young they would leave take her outside put a dog collar around her neck put a chain to her neck change her to a tree and put a dog out for her food and that's how she ate it is they put human food in the dog well they were nice they didn't make her eat dog food i mean that be cruel to make her eat dog food they would make her eat human food out of the bowl do you think that affected her do you think you think that messed up her head pretty pretty bad she did have a she chained to a dog delays that hug the dog no she didn't have she was the dog ok think that she probably made some bad decisions in life do you think that maybe she may have done drugs yeah she became a heroin addict now does she make the choice to be here when addie yes because she blamed those adoptive parents for her being a heroin addict no because she made a choice to be a heroin addict right but do you think in her head it is their fault that she's a heroin addict do you think in her head she's blaming them for every single bad choice she's ever made in life think most of us would do the same thing probably would do the same thing and then we're going to sit here stand here and say watch that she needs to forgive them now if you say she needs to forgive them of fights that are down right there is that you need to forgive them and i guess that and nonchalant way you need to forgive them what you think probably would have been her response to this crew you are right go fly a kite you have no idea what i went through with those all be normal responses ok a k so so out of that how do we get her to a place of understanding forgiveness you have to go to the word and what is the word i want you to be doing about that story then we're going to look at the word and see how we can apply the principle of forgiveness in that situation because the reality here without jesus given the grace to forgive that person could never forgive those parents could they how could they without the power of god and you know many would tell her you don't need to forgive them do you know that she go to counseling counsels you don't need to forgive them they're evil they're bad you don't need to forgive them but look at scripture find out she doesn't forgive she'll be bound up so this look at it we need to let go of unforgiveness towards others for the wounds of sin that have been inflicted upon us number one as jesus forgiven us we need to forgive others anybody got their bible they can look up matthew six fourteen fifteen or you can turn in your pages in the back here and on page four matthew six fourteen to fifteen for if you forgive men for the transcriptions your heavenly father also forgive you but if you do not forgive men your father will not forgive your transgressions if we don't forgive it says what we don't get forgiven by whom by god god the father and now says this and for if you give men for their transgressions your heavenly father for also forgive you but if you don't forgive men their father did you don't forgive men then your father will not forgive your transgressions so that means if you don't forgive others god will forgive you for the sin that you've done now this look at the story the supply the prince of the story is the girl sinning when it comes to diction is more than the disease every knows that addiction is more than a disease it is sin ok is she sinning by her hatred human being and so if you even act like your parents what she assume you're evil just like her parents so is a lot of sin going on with there be a lot of sin in the midst of that ok so out of that sin and that's going on if she doesn't forgive what does the bible say she's not going to get forgiven of any of the sin that she's committed now again is that easy to hear that's not going to be easy here this keep going and we're going to t this together in a moment you can't forget no way to forget can anybody forget the experience as happened to him no way the solution yeah you get all of the off and you may even forget what your name is ok says when then this is what it says when we know that we have truly been forgiven by christ and then deed to turn around extend forgiveness to others we have received  merited mercy and grace from god and now we need to extend the same unwarranted and mercy and grace to others if christ is done so much for us how can we not turn around and give to others the same way this break that down that god has given mercy to us did we deserve his mercy no so does her parents deserve mercy absolutely not they do not deserve mercy for what they've done what they did was evil and there should be no mercy extended to  if you look in the natural realm but god gave us mercy and we didn't deserve it then god gives us grace and the graces his unmerited favor he gives us favor when we don't deserve favor he gives us grace to build to do things we couldn't do without his help and we didn't deserve it so god has given us grace and he's given us mercy and the cost of these given his grace and he's given us mercy what are we to do to others given grace and mercy when it's on warranted so here's the first place that the person has to get to they have to get to a place to acknowledge that what the people did to them was evil and they don't deserve to be forgiven in their heart of hearts they have to come to play say they don't deserve to be forgiven because do they deserve to be forgiven in the natural realm they got out of the picture they deserved what punishment don't pay jail time i don't pay so part of forgiveness is that we have to acknowledge what the person should be getting why do i say that you can't forgive somebody if you don't think what they've done is wrong because you know at the separate with the girl story is like many people victims of abuse she believes somehow it was her fault it wasn't their fault so how can she forgive them they don't need forgiven because who's the bad person she is because how many know when you're raised that environment that's what the people tell you you're two years old you're three years old you're five years old six years old eight years old ten years old twelve years old sixteen years old and you're beaten the abuse that has taken place in your life that abuse is because it's your fault not the views or fault so the first place to be able to even be able to forgive is acknowledge the fact that that person needs to be forgiven because what they've done is evil if you've done any council with people all have gone through situations and you can talk with them and they'll tell you over and over again where they couldn't help it my dad didn't know any better he didn't even have a father race they did the best he can and if you've ever said that ok he did the best he can that might be but does that justify him treat you like a dog rather he had is it understood that rather you had a father not he knows you don't treat your daughter like a dog so she has to come to a place the first acknowledge that what he done is evil that she comes to a place that what he's done is evil he doesn't deserve to be forgiven but because  i am obligated to forgive is that hard that can be tremendously hard so how do you make it easier we get to a place to be able to forgive is how much do we focus on jesus and how much is forgiven us what if i said today the more that we focus on how jesus forgiven us these it is to be able to forgive somebody else so part of it is the look at her own life and look at in spite of all the bad choices all the decisions that she's made that there is a god that loves her that is forgiven her and can she give that same forgiveness and how does she give it she gives it out of what out of faith how do we walk to walk by sight or by faith as a christian walk by faith so how do we forgive we have to forgive by faith we have to believe that god will give us the grace to be able to forgive we have to come to places saying god i agree there is no way i can forgive my parents but they've done there is absolutely no way i can god i need your grace i need you to give me the ability to forgive and can god give the billeted to forgive how do we know that he can because we're forgiven we're forgiven we can have the faith that he can forgive give us the grace to forgive others and how many know that if you've been forgiven yourself that that will stir up faith to believe that god can give you the grace to forgive others and how to know that we can give the have the ability to forgive others if god tells me to forgive is he obligated give me the ability to forgive if god hasn't forgiven it doesn't give me the ability what kind of god is that so god god says i want you to forg i've command you to forgive but you have to do it on your all book of a god is that i don't want that kind of god if god commands us that he's a loving god is a loving heavenly father he commands to forgive he will give us the grace the ability to forgive if we call out to him to be able to give that forgiveness a good number to the forgiveness as others is necessary for healing if we want to expense here lying in our life we have to learn how to forgive others it is a condition to us experiencing true healing and move beyond the past is that we have to be able to forgive others it is especially difficult to prove others who have abused us the children were when we are at the most vulnerable stage of life  also could be very difficult to forgive others who abuses it any age when it comes to sexual physical emotional or verbal abuse when sexual abuse it can be extremely hard to forgive we have given by force manipulation we have given something very intimate  to somebody else isn't that true when the sexual abuse is that we're being forced to give something of ourselves that's very personal there's great of vulnerabilities exposed out of which can grow very intense moon even physical scarring yet no matter no closure in the choice forgive christ can come in and hear hearts once and for all did you hear that part of forgiveness is to bring closure because if you truly forgive guess what happens that tape doesn't get played over and over and over and over and over and over again so this carry that person story out they've been abused by their parents they're treated like a dog they've come to a place that their parents is the guilty party not them it is so strange that think some of this abuse like that would think they're the guilty party that's what abusers do they make you feel like you're the guilty party party they come to places say i'm not the guilty party they're the guilty party they have to make a choice to forgive them when they make the choice to forgive it says that there will be closure and here's why there's closure because once you forgive you're able to watts let it go and when you let it go no longer house power over you so there can come a place when you have that memory that memory does not honshu so the question is in wayne here ever had that experience where you've had to forgive somebody and as you forgave them you realize they don't have the same power over you anybody experience that yet and out of it there's there's a there's a freedom that comes from that there's a peace that comes from that there's a release that comes from that so when it sounds like how could you tell that grohl to forgive her peers but she's done what they've done to her how could you tell that's mean g cruel no that's actually love to help her to be able to get free to be able to get beyond that experience to move beyond the past soul in the midst of this how many all the most people if they're told this will run they will not really embrace the concept of forgiveness and if they don't embrace the forget the concept of forgiveness what happens if they continue to live in the pain and then we've talked in the past about the fact that like the prodigal son that went back to what he meant to the pig spit it with the pigs eight because he had resentments he had regrets all those  many know when you have resentment every gretz you go back into the pit that you came out of so what will happen is she'll make a vow that you cannot trust say she's mexican and they're white what's about that she can make don't don't trust white people and if she makes that val and she can't forgive what happens whenever she interacts with white people what's going to happen you know what'll happen she'll seek out the bad white people to confirm the valve that she made or she will read into it so just an innocent thing if she turns around she meets a white person and they don't say hi to her in her mind of course they don't sigh to me because white people are hateful mean people don't understand what can happen that whole cycle can go but if she's able to forgive them then what happens she can forgive them and then she can say a white person doesn't mean that they're the same as my parents and i can i can i can trust them because they won't hurt me like my parents hurt me you see when forgiveness happens you don't have the same fear as you have otherwise does is  this making sense ok how many know the walk through this process how hard that is it's very hard and we say it could be the mexican that's raised by the white people it could be the woman that has the views of husband that says can never trust men again the man had a controlling mother so then he believes that women are controlling so who is the marry control the women because that's about that he makes women talk later on about that but what happens is when you forgive you're able to let goal and all of a sudden there's a closure and you can move on with life do you know that then when you can move on with life she has one less reason to be a using the heroine then don't cheat because why she used there and what's one of the reasons besides the fact she's addicted to it that's a whole nother issue she's addicted to it she likes the feeling of it that's a whole nother issue but part of that was to run from what happened in the past she has one less and less reason to be able to do the heroin so what if i was to tell you if you tell you tell her if you forgive your parents and you get a healing in your life that you also get free from the heroin there's only one problem what if she doesn't want free from the heroin she's not going to forgive because if she forgives she has one less reason to use the heroin so let me give you the example that metta gentleman was a gutter drunk he was known in capitol hill to be on the park bench and he would just drink all day long all that all night long  night says why do you drink what's going on i mean you didn't start out this way something had to bring you to this place of your of your alcoholism he says because i was in vietnam war has other people in vietnam wars that aren't drunks right there are people in vietnam wars that are drunks i said ok so what happened in the war and he says i was out in the rice rice paddies and there was a father and two sons that were vietnamese and i was ordered to kill them two innocent people three innocent people to kill them why was he ordered to kill them because they could report to the viet cong where they were at how many of the war know that wars are glee very ugly out of that he says i can't forgive myself because i killed three innocent people can god forgive him from killing three innocent people does god understand war and the tragedy of war can god bring total hilla to him and held him to be able place to be able to be forgiven but if he's forgiven guess what there's one less reason to drink is that makes sense so all civil god can forgive you he says well you can forgive me of that but he can't forgive me of this other thing so all the other thing is he is in arizona he's in a bar gets in a bar fight with a friend a friend gets in a bar fight with a friend i mean when you drink sometimes it's the friend isn't the friend gets in a bar fight with a friend and he kills them and he left  he has two main reasons for his drinking and i said to him what if he was just to say you like drinking and not have an excuse for the drinking you are addicted you like alcohol your body is addicted how about we look at that and as a separate issue then what you did so i'm giving you permission to drink all you wot became we go to the forgiveness part and the absolute refuse to do that in the midst of it every day thinking about remorse of what he did and drinking and here's the reality does the drinking get rid of the memories well the drink you never get rid of the memories never get rid of the memories the power of forgiveness is that god can heal you that you can have the memory now has no power over you that's the power of forgiveness and that situation he had to won't forgive himself instead of forgiving others next recreant talk about forgiving ourselves how do we forgive ourselves but if you look you have the grol because the people that abused her the man who turned around and did evil himself and either one of them have a choice of what if they're going to forgive or not and if they don't forgive they're going to be caught in the bondage of what's going on that's the problem with them forgiveness is that buying up doesn't set us free it haunts  father with two kids what does it do and brings back that memory from the one nine hundred seventy s this is two thousand and sixteen and those memories from the seventies are still being brought because he hasn't forgiven and forgave  f i would argue that he could see a father of two vietnamese kids and he'd be looking at the joy of those kids playing with their father and that would be what he would think of instead of what he had done to the power of forgiveness the reason for forgiveness is that god wants riper slate a way he was to make and that we don't have a past certain things just on our past anymore and not there anymore and then the power of forgiveness is guess what happens with the power forgive us the power of forgiveness is is all of a sudden we can talk about the story of the  and it doesn't affect us recipe for if we ever even dot about the store we had to go to our drug of choice whatever it may be workaholism pornography still and be a pathological liar mental illness whatever past that we end up taking to deal with that that when we really see forgiveness we can actually talk about the event and it has no power over us that's true forgiveness that's true deliverance but the only way we get it is we have to let go and the power of the cross forgiveness and inner healing in are valid bitterroot judgments closing open doors breaking every curse breaking every d section be filled with the holy spirit i can promise you that it will not take going through all of the material to be able to move beyond your past but if you keep track with all that we share you will certainly live a victorious overcoming life and i want to let you know that you can live  dot tv forward slash movie on will have the curriculum there we will have the videotape of each session so you'll be able to follow right along with us even if you're not at our church service yes you can move beyond the past yes you can live a victorious life yes your desert places can turn into glorious gardens for others to be able to see the force of victory for their own life's because with god's done in your life this  today you want to get more information you can always go to our website to learn how to accept jesus christ as your lord and savior you can go to there is a war there is there is hope t v dot org and we have information on frequently asked questions to loving god loving people and loving life she had an open door church once you do know that regardless of where you've been or what you've done god loves you there doors are open to anyone and everyone their services are sunday mornings at eleven seattle open