to be human is to lose the person you have shared your life with intimacy in despair in joy in the loss and all those things we have in union with one another there is no greater trauma in the passage of our years to this loss except perhaps the death of beings we have together created how do we endure this how do we go on living how do we were a member of those thousands and thousands of days and nights when we clung to each other knowing that our time together was always going to end with one of us condemned to go on living without the other nature has insulated our memories with the poetry of it all that it will never end and we will be together through all eternity but end it does and it must first one and then the other we say we will never forget but we do we say we will never replace what we do we say and do all sorts of things to delve the shock of it but nothing ever quite does face for if we were in a love then the memory of that love still lingers in the thousand things we shared from our clinging bodies to those children those bodies created to all of the ephemeral but surround us and as the years widen from the shock and the loss we do accommodate we do accommodate and in that state is placed our memories like flowers at the moment of their perfection memories that do endure we cling at things they touched that clothes that did surround them chairs and beds perfume and table lamps and we suffice to make them come again reflected in these presences but then the when they begin to call us and all those things that bring the end of life and then yes then they return to us as if to guide us to the place where they now live what i have written in l but just as real as that moment when i uncovered her and she was mine for ever and for you bob carroll the most precious to my muse thank you for the per what can one say of grief of love there are no more of hours days and years where are the antecedent silence and the arms are empty all that solace a love of her endure where has it gone where other woman played her voice recede and all she was like fever in the sunset i had no power this i could watch her die as flowers in the frost i could not call her back the place she went that i could not be with her never never never i saw that car now closed they took her to a fire or all that beauty would be consumed and there to rest green marble the swamp of all eternity i saw the smoke that engine i heard the pistons greet each other i watched the sun black paint and saw grey silver luminous the morning air with flowers all around her and me the arms of my friend i called her name her name she did not i answer me for she was now another place anticipate the flame that would make her oblivion this you say this this ash you say with the container of lovel voices her name her name her name gone gone gone configured now upon the apple blossoms what walk with me and spring take me to not leave me here a world where you will never walk again he streets of granite whose savages endure and jasmine flake the air will not turn to black that you were asked i know that were transformed in each those marble urns but you were yet alive that part of me we cannot say i cannot say are you never see again eyes forever and forever and forever were not even a second of a second that all my life had changed this beautiful before me she was  and brown her hair were black were blue were brown and all came close the eyes of her where did i know my destiny that hour passed those words of him who i have followed and when my fingers could no more i was my destiny expectant oh how i love that bless that year she was in exodus when she made me alive i am a man it was she went across the sea my life was broke was broke because she were in another place and i could not go because she was unattainable the place country a city i was not resident gone and gone and gone and so i wrote a letter on paper thin and fine i wrote that i adored her and i wanted her to wife whenever that could be whenever that could be was her i always wanted so i could see her eyes divinity and then some words some words there came an answer that yes they are all the difference she could return my love she did return my love there were some words how to play when i didn't know when i did know and they were these from david to his love each day of my life i shall kiss her lips in time will not to face the altar i have made of you and now and now nine decades i am fifty and almost to that you are gone from me the ecstasy remain the feel the smell of her are not indented from my skin but they're there but now one into my life a man i put on clothes with to define i reveled in my beauty that all who saw it desired and yet i was alone till such month i entered into others mouth lumin i loved i loved yet yet i did it to her compilation hold the beauty nature made a woman by my side how did this my memory that autumn night when in that lonely room who lay in my arms and i did watch you die i spoke i spoke i spoke of passion all my life and that w said your eyes your eyes which gave great light that darkness your eyes would said i now in jest your words but if you now i must for another life are calling me that you you were traveling alone a place i could not you wife my wife i heard within you sound i heard your life abandon me and saw your eyes lose luster i could not bring you back conspire i said conspire i cried those decades you were daily they shout only come alive again i was there where love was still our covenant i cannot say your name i cannot say your name for even though my mouth  open the sound are too far buried too so articulate the name the way you looked the way you walked the way you said my knee i feel that flannel still that cloth with did in case you feel i feel how could i now how could i know when you first are my eyes those minutes your eyes would there and come play with me there in there in their house so i can live in my memory were you were you are landscape were to me foreign were indeed the color of my blood i saw your boat come near me were impelled all they in human skin to race the path that place and gather you in yellow coped to never let you go until four decades more your breath that go for me old lady lady lady now silence all about me how can i now forget that bless the day in april come fifty eight tomorrow when you did say those words i am now yours forever i and mud have passed the sun to air to nothingness to even memory none who live this place but now recorded some book stone closed stone shot stone and stone stone and i am dead who will remember you is that i ever from will that silk oh my darling my darling my darling where have you gone i have you left me here a raft alone never see never hear never feel the warmth of you again the shadows the mornings come when they go you are not here you ever were i he i cannot call you i cannot hear your breath your hair your skin your voice and all the area were now gone and gone gone i cannot i go from flower fields to street and chairs and back past  and all of it here to find you close he make it to my skin live as music in the midnight sky close to me you're even name you soon will be t would never come again and where i am here been lost to all eternity i say i see the flowers and the birds i say do you remember her do you remember me who loved her from the domes those streets the green in here the places we lived half long  who melody come in my soul that i can savor through the years we were together the joy i feel now joy yes we were together doing that we were one