residents the maternal grandparents continue to be available to assist the mother's been the primary still parent in the children have been with mother since the party separated on july sixteenth or twenty first two thousand a lab so those are the first things that you have to look at when deciding whether that the court used is really discretion in this case you have a situation where the kitchen don't play this is an incredibly involved first warm should get up with her at night to nurse shoot would cook for them clean up after the change the diapers grocery shop schedule all play dates make connections with other moms so the children play together she testified that she was the one to purchase the birthday gift for the children when they went to parties court although all their activities kids got sick she was one the stay home with this preventing because she could have been a perfect mother but it seemed to me that judge blackman was worried about the possible alienation of the father by her that i think you're right but what i think you have to ask is what evidence of alienation was there it was not there was nothing to show that these children were in any way what ever think the violin lessons you think that payless and you think all this involvement all of these things that are set forth in the great all the incredible things that this mom is not it's not going to continue this guy's an alcoholic he's going to go drink in the  saying that he works at a bar i mean he works at a bar is a school teacher a teacher to this day that goes worse than a bar two three four times a week i mean it's pervasive this is it this is going to attract this is going to get tragedy if mr went down the wrong path than of took that same path well i don't know if you're just serious your point about a question i think really becomes here becomes this if you look at what the basis of the opinion was for the decision we owe a significant amount of deference to the trial of course find your share judge blocked lose their hearing the evidence determining credibility issues so what isn't specifically that you can point to us  the other question and by the way this whole thing up my client being an alcoholic it was one dui conviction there's no reason to believe he's an alcoholic his testimony and of course both parents drinking and any other way it's consistent with her email saying hey he's not using these children it's consistent with everything she was in fact she talks she's got these i did you just described them as medieval sexual attitudes towards the children you mean by that well she won't she testified but she won't what the children are thinks it's inappropriate for the children to go use the restroom with him they're going to focus our public plan she says i'm a father if a child has a bad dream and it's a girl child she should be able to come to our father in the middle of night ask if you can spend the night there i'm a father should be able to take the child swimming and if you think about these add to this they seem like well she's just her husband the school teacher sexually what she do created night mirror situation should everything she can to keep the father away from but this is the one that really bothers me is he's a schoolteacher right so the allegation of sexual abuse destroys the family if that gets out he loses his job families gone he provides all the money to the family basically she testifies mother said she believed it happened anyway how is she going to facilitate a relationship with these children if she believes she sending her children away every weekend or whatever to a sex abuse i know she doesn't believe that and it shows a great deal would send them to the sexual abuse or court order or not i'd be sitting in jail i think that you're going to get one of those two things but these views on go back to the views they considered from crazy views are part of it's because if you can't go to the bathroom with your children in a public place well you can have a lot of fun you can go to games you can you going to do you want abstinence she's trying to do here she doesn't want dads to be a place of fun she wants moms to be the only place that they are a safe haven i think she calls or something of that nature we've got such evidence including her e mails about how she wants to keep the father away from and the reason we know his actions were terrible is because the judge took that into consideration when the judge took all of this topic and i don't know i don't think i could answer your question well or what or even if he's calling her slut and calling her last words her last name she has he got a foster relationship with her well i mean she's saying his head looks like a penis in front of the children he's using dirty little she's using dirty language in front of him in front of the children  i mean yes this isn't the ideal situation i mean i would really enjoy these people to realize they have children together and be more mature and i think that's certainly an indication that my client is trying to do refused to provide him a copy of one of the children's i e a used to allow him to take the children to a doctor refused to tell him the name of the girl's counsellor and refused to allow him pick up the girls from school claiming that if he did it would be a himself throughout the entire case up and tell the g a o report once the g a o reported that he should have custody because of these actions on her part then it calmed down a little bit after that but not until the g a o recommended he have costed to that slowdown but as far as those comments i believe those came out of my client's testimony j'onzz testimony as to something stop op i don't remember her  g those comments but i could be wrong but many of them were supported by males anyway and i don't believe she refused any of the male compen by i mean i think and i'm not saying this well maybe i am but but the judge wrote it takes really detailed twenty six page report he could souter every argument this is an abuse of discretion even if he doesn't believe what the judge said to me is outrageous there is not a single issue they brought up that we could consider to know it is all an abuse of discretion and if you look at the issues before issues they crowd up as far as the court here in failing to make a finding that william was unwilling to facilitate the relationship the court talks about things that are juvenile he didn't consider that in great detail as far as the mothers that are meant to again it may have been longer but only because the mother did more things we are the two doctors t the timing of getting all this high performing the visitation on her e mails the g a o reports this is for to talk about but he certainly addressed those issues in great detail now as far as the trial court hearing acceptable hearsay is what we're going through the jail term but this was never called as a with this it shouldn't have been considered and i'm he basically already talked about what mr just wanted him to talk about he clearly did consider it even though i don't think he should of in his report so not only are the guardian the items testimony regarding sexual abuse case mental health i generally we're told every other weekend there we're talking every other weekend maybe a few hours on wednesday during the week the court specifically said in this case that he's going to give her more protocol in fact did give her more than protocol i the mother certainly has had a close relationship with these children and we're not trying to deny either parent a chance to find children but if the mother were to have custody my client would never relationship know it closing i would just say that if we if you read this report and you see that this woman was willing to sacrifice her children and everything else to falsely accuse somebody of sexual abuse then i don't i don't understand how it would make any sense with that issue alone for her to have  attorney claims section it's really tough when you're a parent sit there see these things happening to your kids and then be afraid to do anything and maybe that's the message if you do something ultimately in the course case it's going to come back and bite you more visitation what was to learn his client does those checks if i remember were weeks this might have been the most recent check where he writes to her katherine shit this is weeks before the hearing that doesn't  somebody who is sort of libya's to the fact that a judge might look at this and think pop you must really have a problem here sir you're still writing checks and putting that expletive on your check a couple of days a week before the hearing that to me is