i believe in retreat and active moving back or withdrawing i think withdrawal from the pressure and structure of everyday life is essential it is like a specific amount of time where my mind can rest and my physical body can heal especially from that infamous skin tight crop tops in four inch heels that the media considers trendy if people know me well they can easily note that i'm a seventeen year old girl who worries just about everything my grades my tennis matches my driving skills and embarrassingly my hairstyle i dream for those perfect hair days that make me look put together even though on the inside i'm an emotional mess these worries make it impossible to enjoy everything life has to offer however once my family and i retreated to a gun grant maine we knew we had found the perfect refuge we have been going to a gun quit for the past six years and counting years early my film family and i are there for the last few days in june into the first few days of july and yes you guessed it we are purposely there for the fourth of july i remember the day when i realized it was my safe haven july fourth two thousand and eleven it began around ten o'clock in the morning due to my incapability of waking up early with my toes trying to ignore the major teal chippendales in the ocean there was something about the salty water then made it seem like my worries were being taken by the current this regarding the fact that after just ten seconds of being in the water every body part would go numb the numbness led me to feel emotionless like every thought i had just became a jumble of words in my mind but that's what made me appreciate life because i had finally stopped thinking and just began to appreciate i appreciate the fact that the bakery known as bread and roses had the best cinnamon sticks in the whole entire world that there was a path the town had carved out outlining the ocean known as marginal way covered in colorful flowers and that i was able to spend quality time with my family who always can put a smile on my face as the sun began to set my family and i decided we would go back to our rental home and get ready for the fourth of july celebration that rental home was extremely cozy and felt like we stumbled upon a hidden gem as night time approached we took our annual walk to the town center passing the overly priced jewelry store and the surprisingly yummy sushi restaurant then the most amazing candy store that would catch my eye with their very tempting window display of red gummy lobsters the classic candy that most tourists thought if the in would help enhance the spirit of maine fifteen's that's east and my family and i approached probably the best piece to pizza restaurant in town they had every single topping  available ranging from cheese or pepperoni to lobster a spicy buffalo chicken but you guessed it i went the classic cheese once seven o'clock hit we booked it to the beach knowing the fireworks show was just about to begin i was ready to just live in the moment and enjoy the celebration when the first fireworks exploded into the sky and burst with pink and green spark i surprisingly felt nothing but pure joy the boom crack and fizzle of the fireworks had overpowered any worry that i still had the sparks of light blinded me to the stress i had for the future but gifted me serenity because i could just watch that was the only thing expected from me listening speaking interacting studying and rushing are all things expected from me being a student teenager and daughter of four and i got great mane i was just a seventeen year old girl with no worries