think well we're the ones that are getting married that's your home i don't know larry i read somewhere that our marriage with our parents approval has two strikes on it from the start  my folks don't understand the way i feel about the story mr hobbs do you think you can help us get married while i'm in favor in fact i spend a good deal of my time helping people get ready before well but not like this this is the real thing yeah i had a chum in college who had the real thing with eight successive girls so when it's all right if you have it fine it's a very important factor in building a happy marriage but tommy idea no it's really about the kind you can get married or why ever since i first met larry i haven't wanted to date anyone now three months oh movies i'm popular artist or dancing there is chosen profession engineering no i don't understand any of it i don't like to hear about it so honey i didn't know you felt that way might say he should ask them before the fire we call is cupid checklist first do you have similar backgrounds similar bases for your ideals and stand second are you real friends time or pass through thick and thin and third do you both understand man all not the kind in most movies are most popular songs that the real every day trying to match between real people do you understand jolly mr hart i don't know the answer to all those questions i just know that i'm in love with sue is that bad that's good and it's  good when you recognize that you don't know the answers it's a good sign i don't know i think we're friends and maybe we can understand marriage but background how do they the time they are born until they die but what does it all mean well let's set it up for you and when you are born you inherit a great many differences from your parents that's part of your background that makes sense all right now as you grow up  each develop separate in your personality your mental growth your emotional affluence your standards and ideals larry your distinctly masculine outlook on life and sure your feminine way of looking at things your capacities to love these in many other ways you each require a background so that when you first met you were probably farther apart probably more distinct individuals than when you were born but i don't want to marry a girl like me i want to marry a man so even though a close together here we don't know how far apart we are there that's it happens in some degree to most couples who become happily married but it takes more than is boring for you to see if you're too far apart psychologically if you're backgrounds are not similar enough it can cause a great deal of argument  to take time to find out how much strain these differences might put on your own magic rock that there isn't any time where it's going away in a couple of months yet did you two ever see the figures on length of engagement and how it relates to chances for happiness and met two separate studies showed that chance for happiness improves with a longer engagement period it's fair for six months better for a year or two if that because there's a better chance to find out some of these differences and become real friends yaps a chance to find out if your relationship where well yes but yet we find out the difference of after we're married and if you aren't successful before you become too deeply involved find out if the distance might turn out to be too great there's another angle that should interest you both polyhedron married affects the chance for happiness you can see that the chances are better after the man reaches twenty one or so the same studies show that the woman must be one hundred twenty before the chances for happiness begin to be good but why but the difference between nineteen and twenty one is so different isn't new in the next few years elect and you young people seem to change and mature in the years from eighteen to twenty one or even later so that a person you might marry at eighteen years old will seem like quite a different person to you a few years later what are we going to do i thought you were going to help us get married i believe i can i think you two have a lot of what it takes to build a successful marriage yet you wouldn't try to plan and build a house in three months where you shouldn't of marriage have better planning are going to build a successful family team that will last for forty or fifty years all alone do you think it should take to get ready all right how do we know when we've done it when the two of you are ready for majerus has a new feeling between the two of you united as a pair thinking as one unit acting as one unit in the building of a marriage in a new family your sense of parents shows up in the way in which you consider what's best for the pair of you or what you want individually for yourself i think all of you speak of things from yeah we'll say you saw in terms of the checklist for cuba marriage to began to examine their readiness for marriage do we have similar backgrounds do we agree on our religious beliefs and have the same feelings about religion in general do we have the same ideals to stand what about two and me are we real friends do we have a real happiness in being together talking and just doing nothing together with each of us really want to make the other to have a real interest in each other in the sense of pride in  to really understand marriage do we understand the social aspects of marriage have we an understanding about money matters and how important it is to have enough money to do more than just get overall do we have a feeling of hair unity those questions were helping us to find out just how strong our relationship was and helping us to strengthen it next time we called on mr o we realized how much he had been helping us has been talking for some time with our parents most seem to be general agreement that sue and i now had a much better idea of just how much psychological distance still separated us if you want to your mother and i we can make arrangements for you to begin school and state you would larry at the junior college  i we both want to thank you and say now do you think we have anything more than buying heroes i think you've made a good start towards getting ready for