thank you for joining me today i'm very excited to see so many people here because i think that means that we all have a dream that we want to pursue that way yeah  can probably tell me what each of the letters represent because these steps are pretty common there are steps that a lot of people who work with others about manifesting their dreams so i bet that you  can help me identify them and i just realized i should probably tell you who i am i'm susie spidey and i am a dream coach and i also host and produce a local t v show in belmont massachusetts and that's my dream and that dream came true last fall and the entire i ha no experience in television production knew nothing about it it literally happened by me saying one day wow i'm doing these different things what would you miss when you reach the most people and i said i need a t v show three days later i got an e mail from a coaching group that actually led me to the bat media center where i produced my show now so it can happen you just have to put your dream out there and follow it so any further that i spent twenty something years in corporate america the last four years of which doing a position that i really really didn't like and you know for years i was developing my dream and it was like stops and starts and fears and doubts and you know it really took me ten years from the point that i knew i wanted to get into coaching and i wanted to help inspire other people to the point of doing it and i don't want it to take you that long i don't want you to take that long i want you to go for it because the thing is if i'd known what i know now you know which obviously had to go through that process but i don't think it would have taken me so long so let's get to the steps so again they relate to the can tell me what the first step of a might be so we have to take actions for our dreams to come true you know what would be be what we might stand believe exactly you gotta believe in your dreams right and then we might is a good one curry is moving closer that's part of it but it's clarity it's getting really clear about what your dream is so this we want to say clarity we learned a b c s right and we learned that you start with a and that the tar baby and then c right we memorize that god bless you and we learn that that's the process you follow right that's the flow and when you look at these steps and how i don't many of us have lived our lives or are living our lives you know so often the first thing we do is take action we have to be doing we've got to be going we've got to keep keep taking response to work hard you know if we work really hard then we'll get somewhere and we'll be successful will be important right how many of us grew up being told that you got to work hard to get to keep doing right after we don't even know why we're doing what we're doing you know there may be expectations of our family or our partners you know and we think well we don't want to disappoint anyone right and we don't want to stop doing it because god forbid someone thought we were lazy right so we just keep going and we keep acting taking action keep going moving forward right you know that's not how it works you have to leave in your dream to make it happen you know but often times we think well ok we'll just take action w and move in one direction and eventually maybe we'll get some evidence that our dream might you know be able to come true so so maybe that little bit of evidence well help us to believe we're right and so the have a little bit of belief and we think we're continuing to take action then maybe get a little more clear about what we really want how many of how many of us take time to really think about what we want and think about the details of it to get really clear right we often think that that's going to calm you know our as you're progressing a rag and you're moving forward well you know that dream where where become clear one day right well here's the thing in order to really manifest your dreams and not allowed to take ten years you got to flip the about what our dream is we have to be able to write it down in a living color and really experience it and most importantly be able to feel whole your dream in your body we need to be able to feel all right it's going to feel like once we're living that dream what's it going to feel like in your body what do you what's going to taste like it's going to smell like you know really get down into it so how do you get clear about your dream well here's some things that you can do the first thing is to get really quiet and go inside and listen we need to take the time to connect with our inner voice all the and we have all the answers there inside of us and if we just take time to be open and listen we'll hear the answers that were so we're searching for you'll be able to connect with what your dream is so take the time i really encourage you and i know this is hard i really struggle you know you can do this through meditation or prayer and i used to really struggle with meditation you know just the idea of sitting there for thirty minutes or however long it was was really difficult and you know i encourage you start with two minutes a day just say i'm going to give myself two minutes to be quiet and just focus on my breathing and then build up from there and if you find meditation to be difficult try wrapping meditation that's actually my kind of favorite form of meditation is to really get out in nature and w and as i'm walking i tried to let my thoughts go and just focus on what surrounding me and take it in so that's that's one thing that that i encourage the second thing is visualize your dream which you mentioned right somebody mentioned visualize your dream yes this is so important to really be able to see what your dream is and i'd like to take a few minutes now to actually do a little visualization with you if that's ok so to start if you could write down does everybody have a dream first for their life and the thing is your dream could be anything you know it may be that you want a loving relationship or it may be that you want a new career direction or maybe that you want to travel or maybe you want to spend more time with your with your family or friends it can be as big or as small as you want but it's your team and you can manifest it so if you can start by just writing down a dream that you have for your life so when you're ready if you could close your eyes and get into a comfortable position really your sitz bones get grounded and begin to focus on your breath to your dream the dream that you've now put out to the universe by writing it down to see yourself on the other side of the stream imagine this dream has already happened you're living your dream and feel what that feels like picture who's with you what are the surroundings what does it smell like what does it taste like really allow your dream to unfold of how your life will be when you're living this dream and weird you feel it in your body and focus on that part of your body for a moment to where you are now opening your eyes did anyone have a vision of what your life will be like when your dream  so hold on to that vision hold on to that feeling that you felt and know that you can go back there at any time and take the time every day or as often as you can to go back to that place and really live your dream when your dream is already happened you're living your dream and feel it in your body does that make sense ok so the third step create a dream or a vision board how many of you have done dream boards or vision boards are excellent great the way if you haven't done one before the way to do it is to get a big piece of board and begin collecting images pictures words that represent your dream to you and create a collage on a board that shows your dream in living color shows all the aspects of it everything that you want and then what you've created your collage keep it in a visible place where you see it often and when you see it when you pass by you know take a moment to just take yeah that's where i'm going that's what i write that's what i'm going to be that's what my life is going to be about right and have fun with this this is something that you can do with your friends or your kids you know so really really have fun with  so the next thing clear clatter to make room for your dream how many of us how many of you have schedules that are just mind you're completely overwhelmed with your daily tasks and it just feels like you're racing from one thing to the other and how many of you have a hard time saying no i do you know what you have to do i mean this the idea of clearing clutter is not just about clearing physical clutter you know that's an important step as well if you have particularly if you can create a space where you keep your vision board and where you can meditate it's really important to have a space that's very clear for that particularly but more than physical space you have to clear space in your schedule in your daily life you know and it may mean that you're going to have to disappoint someone but is it more important to disappoint someone else profs possibly a stranger or someone you don't know very well then yourself you know again it comes back to what's most important who's most important here right so we're crude the hope of your family your friends you know tell your family what you need from them to make your dream come true you know and it may mean that they're going to have to step up and help you you know clean the bathrooms and make the beds and make dinner you know but ask that ask for that help you know and it may mean saying no to that next committee meeting or to the p t a or over to your friend who asked you to you know come in you know spend the evening listening to her problems you've got to take time for you and you've got to make that a priority so the next step is connecting with your passion enjoy and this is this is actually what works for me it's so important particularly if you if you are very clear on what your dream is if you're not exactly sure what you want to do start by finding something that you're passionate about and something that brings you joy when you're doing it for me it was dance when i do a particular form of dance i am happy i feel free i am able to like let go of all my fats and so find something that takes you to that place of joy you know maybe rocking in nature it may be scrapbooking it may be being with your children you know but whatever it is take the time to do that as often as possible and when you're when you begin to spend time doing things you're passionate about your dream  unfold they are coming to you and then the last thing is to talk about your dreams but with conditions and i would encourage you to wait until you have a bit of a firearm of your dream before you spout really start putting it out there but the idea is that when you say your dream out loud it becomes real it's out there you know you've planted the seed so often times talking about it will actually help be flushed out and a lot of times you'll get great ideas from people but here's the key you have to put conditions around talking about it when you're talking about your dream you want to let the person know that you're not looking for our you know feedback or whether it's a good idea or not them that you just want to be able to talk about your dream and get get more clarity around it and if they have some support and positive suggestions that's great but that's all you want you don't want any naysayers no one telling you your dream is not possible don't let any of that is ok so now we want to move on to believing in our dreams if we don't believe in our dreams no one else is going to believe in them ok so we have to believe that our dreams are possible and belief is a choice it's just a choice you choose to believe that it's possible and you know how many of you think that your dream that you wrote down that you can make your dream happen right now that's fantastic that's fantastic so you already have that the seed of that belief you know so just build on it so this is this is again one of the things that worked really well for me is expressing gratitude every day when you start and do any of you keep a gratitude journal or have a practice of gratitude wonderful have you have you've experienced the differences that it makes yeah i mean i started keeping a gratitude journal ten years ago and literally within like five days things started shifting for me and i go in and now you know of of keeping it and i can tell the difference when i when i don't when i don't keep it so we have so much to be grateful for right now at times you may not feel like you have that much to be grateful for you know if things aren't going your way you're maybe you're dealing with an illness or you know a family members illness but you have so much to be grateful for and it can start with this a simple thing as i have a warm bed to sleep in because i bet we all do you know i have clean water to drink so every day take the time to either weight or to say out loud five things that you're grateful for that day and i encourage you know either doing it in the morning or the or that evening i actually do it in the evening and i actually created a thirty day gratitude journal to do this because  research has proven that it typically takes between twenty and thirty days for a behavior to change or to establish a behavior as a habit so commit to expressing your gratitude for the next thirty days and see what happens the next thing is using affirmations affirmations are really powerful however how many of you are familiar with louise hay's you can heal your life it's just it is a war under for wonderful book and she is i feel like she's the the queen goddess of affirmations i mean this woman has she changed her life she healed herself from breast cancer using affirmations and she's here hold millions of people with her with the work that she's done but i encourage you to come up with at least five affirmations that really resonate with you and represent your dream and take the time every day to say those out loud preferably looking in the mirror so literally looking at yourself looking yourself in the eye and saying you're affirmations it really can be very powerful and you want to focus your affirmations on in the present tense so focus them on the outcome rather than the process so for example you might say i want to be in a loving relationship you want to shift that around to say i'm in a loving supportive relationship you want to make it present as if it's already happened right and a lot of people have to have trouble with this you know because you think how can i that's crazy how can i say that when i know it's not true but you know what when you say it you're sending a message out to the universe you're putting it out there that i have this and the universe is going to respond and make it happen for you so it's it works in you know with believing you know by saying this is what i have so if you if you want a new job rather than saying i'll be happy when i have a new job say i'm so happy that i found a new career direction that brings me joy whatever works for you but just make it in the present tense the next thing is  identifying your limiting beliefs and letting them go typically when you're struggling with believing in your dreams it's because there are some kind of limiting belief that's holding you back and you may not even be aware of it you know our limiting beliefs are formed typically from zero to seven that's kind of when they're ingrained in knots we've heard messages you know like oh you can't do that you can't do this sort of thing and we take those those messages that we've heard you know as a small child and we we carry those with us into our adult life and they practice you know and they hold us back so it's really important to figure out what might be holding you back you know one of the key questions i ask my coaching clients is where do you feel stuck and what's holding you back and if you ask those questions of yourself you'll get an answer if you continue to ask the question you know an answer will come and once you've been able to identify your limiting beliefs how do you get rid of it you know i'm not saying it's that easy i'm not saying it's like i am glad gee i was told but you know i couldn't dance when i was a kid so obviously i can't that's what's holding me back so i just stop thinking that i'll never forget one time when i was in a major depression finally telling my mother about it and her saying well you switch in your mind you know when those when the self when the negative self talk starts you know which usually you know your doubts or your fears start the tape press  play and that tape starts spinning you know of oh i can't do that a lever work for me and you now on the ground i you know i just whatever it is for you i think we all have have those tapes you know when you become aware of it you can often just say stop train yourself to stop the tape and switch your thoughts because you can actually switch your thoughts you're in control of what you're thinking you know so make that choice to switch your thought and it takes a lot of practice and it's something that you have to continue to work with but becoming aware of what's holding you back is the key and that's that's the first step so another thing that you can do is document your past successes you know all have things that we've been successful at and our lives and it could be as simple as i'm the best fed maker there ever was an hour i make the best chicken ca those things literally you know and we start having doubts and thinking i can't do this go back and look at your list in and it proves to you i've done a lot of great things i can be successful proven it to myself already you know and then the last thing is start acting as if so if you want to be in a relationship let's say start acting as if you already are so and that may mean going out to buy new buying you know a new outfit you know or making the choice to put yourself out there you know where you might meet someone you know are going to imagine the places you would want to go with your partner go to those places spend time doing the things that you would want to do in a relationship you know but begin to act as if it's already happened you know and again that will feed that seed of belief you know and get things going ok so the next thing taking don't take action our dreams are just a nice idea they're just going to be a nice thought we had re we have to take action in order to make our dreams come true for the first thing is follow the bread crumbs what do i mean by that the universe go ahead absolutely absolutely you've gotta listen to your intuition and follow your heart the universe whatever you want to call god the universe spirit  the universe drops breadcrumbs along our path and those black crumbs will guide us to our dreams if we just stop long enough to see them and actually pick them up and do something with them right so you know how you sometimes get like a gut instinct that you should do something you know you get a flash of oh wow i should do this and it's just a flash often and how many of those instincts gut feelings or flashes do you say i have no i don't have time for that it's probably just you know that's crazy think in right that's what's going to lead you to your dream is taking action on those gut instincts and those flashes that's what's called inspired action you know we're being sent a message we're being told this is the next step you need to take but it's up to us to actually take the step right so number two ask for what you need and what you want again it's putting your dream out there and asking for support you know the bottom line is people want to help you know and if you ask for help most people are going to want to help you specially if you're telling them about your dreams  so start with your family and friends you know and tell them what you need from them to help you pursue your dream you know maybe you need their time or their support or maybe  backing who knows you never and the thing is you never know what's going to come by putting putting your dreams out there right i know for me one instance of this was there was a dance training that i really wanted to go to but i just i really didn't feel like i could spend the money on it and i went back and forth and thought you know i just i just can't i can't do this but something told me to contact the person who is who is leading the training so i did and i called him and i said i so want to do your training but i just really can't put the money out there right now and we started talking and i started telling him about what i what i do and at the time was marketing and he's like oh i've been looking for someone to do marketing for me we ended up doing a barter where i did marketing for him and he let me come to his dance training so you never know what's going to show up when you put it out there in the ask so the third thing is create an action plan and this is not your typical action plan so the key here is so many people get stuck with taking action on their dreams because they start thinking of everything that has to happen or everything you might have to do to make your dream come true and it gets totally overwhelming have any of you experienced that of having that stop you just think oh my gosh there's no way i can possibly do all this right here's the thing you don't have to be in charge of how it's going to happen let the universe take care of that you just have to take action right you're going to be guided if you listen and if you follow those gut instincts right and so you just have to take action so what i mean by creating an action plan is to look at your dream say let's project three months out and say let's say you want to change careers and the credit you want to move into may require some additional training or certification or something like that so create an action plan around ok so if i want this to happen i'm probably going to need you know some more training some more certifications so i put on my action plan research programs that would provide me with the training that i need look at when those programs are offered you know collect that data don't start trying to figure out how you're going to afford it or how you're going to possibly work this into your schedule just gather the information you know and start with those steps that you can do right and they don't it's not necessarily a plan of what's going to get you to your dream but it's a plan of things you know you can do if you want to new relationship you know think about why maybe i need to go shopping maybe i need a new outfit or maybe i need to get my hair cut or whatever you know maybe i need to spend more time doing the things that i love to do because that's probably where i'll meet someone so those are the kind of action steps i'm talking about does that make sense ok for the next thing is do at least one thing every day on your action plan commit to yourself to doing one thing at least one thing every day toward your dream it can be as little as ten minutes you know but make one phone call you know send one e mail spend ten minutes researching you know an area that's related to your dream online but give yourself that commitment you know to move forward because that's what it's all about it's taking the next step and it's taking baby steps you know it's not looking at the whole big picture it's just taking that next step and as you begin to take those next steps things will unfold the next thing is keep a journal to record how your dream unfolds so start a dream journal and began by writing down your dream you know and write it in as much detail as you have at this time and begin to add to the details as it unfolds and the record the successes that you have along the way and the things that start coming up and it's a wonderful thing to have to go back and reflect on you know if you get to a point where you feel like on the things happening you can go back to your dream journal and say wow a lot's happened i think it's a progress here you know and it just adds to your your hope and your faith that it's going to happen so those are my three key steps to pursuing your dreams and making your dreams happen does anyone have questions or comments or things that like to share with the group anything that's that's worked for you that's helped you in moving toward your dreams and if any would like to add i actually do a three month coaching program around this process and i also do individual coaching at you know whatever you need if anyone has interest i have some cards up here and and a flyer and if you would like to sign up for a free guide and actually get the outline of the presentation for free to sign up so i have an and