preacher park so you won't want to miss that get here early or you'll miss the merit chucking a midget at three to park in the circus tent at the south end of the grandstand a four five eleven hundred we've got lots of horses here let's give the field once again if you want to play and you have never played racinet preacher park it's really easy it's just like a hoss race except you can only pick one hoss it don't cost you anything so it's not gambling for those of you who are confused on what gambling actually is gambling is this you must make a wager therefore you must have some consideration an i e d gambling means money or other things and none of that is necessary so you this is the only track in the world in the whole ruled where you can't lose eight four five eleven hundred here's your field of twelve tonight don't forget here's your comments on tonight's first race three eyed billy will where  the horse's name you must give me the horse's name or you can't play you must give the horse's name or reasonable facsimile thereof no numbers you can give me a number but you better attach the horse's name to it or you cannot participate ok pretty simple here's your field and your sponsors for the horses tonight number one is uncle fester who is owned by don columbine skeet number two is owned by the sweet house bakery that bamma and gloria when will take a ride on the doormat number three owned by whiting time don't spank the monkey crackers rides i'm number four on my time hague is nature boy ridden by hop sing and hop sing prefers the company of men number five owned by tim street services can vegetable vegetable number six owned by freddie steakhouse tammy's whammy though amie number six number seven o fast eddie eddie number eight number nine zero and untrained by state line jim and his wife candy i mean kathy sorry kathy maybe has someone named candy in a live memo she have to do is give me a call give me the horses name your id once there's five people on a horse that horse is closed out and right now let me give you the horses we do have three who are currently closed number two the obama very popular a lot of action and obama tonight though obama is our favorite number three also closed out don't spank the monkey monkey closed out up all those are closed out everybody else is still available that means there's five players already on those three horses so those horses cannot carry any more weight five people will win tonight there's a distinct possibility for calling their teacher this is sam from st john how are you i'm taking a beating sam how you doing good pretty good you're on the top of the grandstands can you see the number four's nature boy i can plainly  got you've got a hot one there but thanks ok there were some complaints lodged against nature boy even before the race yesterday highland canny called and i believe nature boy or maybe it was paying when has been bothering is if you the crack at not letting zippy get the appropriate amount of sleep before race day it might have been nature boy could have it all go faster i can't remember who it was but larry if you're out there listen and make sure that all the game horses are in section eight at preacher park all the way down at the end i don't want to enter mingling with the rest of the horses keep them down there at the far end of preacher park that would be the north and away from the circus  that's how i got my name really but they stuff it differently yeah well yeah well why because i'm a girl well hey it's ok are you a valley girl man no i'm not a valley girl as the wagers get hot and heavy number two the obama closed out number three don't spank the monkey is closed up number seven zippy the crack it is closed out at number nine no more wagers on the penguin might be and you never know paul i got you firmly attached number eleven super ticket i'll get that you want to go to the finish line for a cold one after the race i gotta go to work that's a drag ok well stop by later toes back to back you know to right i know i was trying to get ahead before i am but i couldn't get through so well you just closed out twinkle toes my dear oh ok very good that's the one you're the last one on standby put it in my wallet somewhere here so nobody would steal it good you hurt my hand man don't be hurt me a four five eleven hundred you got to give the horse's name if you don't know the horse's name you can play thanks arrive this morning just to check things out because you know i do the preacher tour course i toured the track on race day there were still caucuses laying down at the end of the south end of the grandstand and what they were doing i don't know if they were dead or sleepin hey thanks for call daddy's a trying to steer you in a certain direction ok well rach you've got nature boy a little ranch you've got little rich he's got nature boy hey ask him if you have to ask your dad if you were named after dick van dyke