you just did i know my responsibility as crew chief and you should have remembered it last night don't shout you have a flight this morning you know what was at stake brass here to watch you lose your shirt in a game what happened mike i've got a lie down i'm sick ok go on the c q room let me know when you're ready to talk for your sake i hope you've got a real good reason for what you did all i got was a lot of double talk and be to see any trouble with his crew or anything you know although he was worried about hank and yesterday why well i overheard them well i got a letter today and gone back in the hospital again and i'm sorry to hear that another operation looks like kind of takes my mind off things here and i can sympathize but remember no matter what problems we may have that's no excuse for not doing our job and i just can't help that i learned about it course g r that's to your credit but you've also got your duty to do here you're part of a that other guys are depending on you maybe with their lives so no matter what problems any of us may have we can't let them interfere with our job that's got to come first yeah sure but i hope everything works out boss don't shew me out again you've got something against haircuts and shoe shine heck what's the difference how my head and feet look as long as i know what to do with my hands because how you look is part of being an airman don't you have any pride yeah sure but what's that got to do with keeping my head looking like the wrong end of a pig find useful and that might be an improvement look you're a good mechanic i'm glad you're on my crew but other people have a habit of judging the air force by the way we look haven't given the rest of us a break ok such but it's a sacrifice so today slim shows up looking like the pride of the air force and and joe is on his face and i can't figure i might join this new study information just came in thanks i was everything in the education department better off than here is not unless unless what well joe was talking to me last week we were discussing some courses he finished and what he ought to take next what about world history mr have you think that might be a good idea yes i do joe you've been sticking pretty close to the technical side and world history would give you a valuable overall background for some of the things that are happening the way i feel a fact i just wish there was time enough to take a couple more courses along with it so much to learn and so little time been going you shouldn't have any regrets there and i want to compliment you on your fine grades i know it's taken a lot of hard work and self discipline with a wife and two kids almost three that is i've got to keep thinking about the future and the way i figure out the more a guy learns the better his chances are so joe signed up for world history and a course in american government what's that got to do with what happened this morning well joe's been pushing himself pretty hard in cramming ever fight to do i never heard about it my wife and i see him often on that is when joe isn't busy ladies worried about his wife being pregnant would be wanting to talk to him i maybe i will sure like to get a line on what happened before joe has to face the oh man yes he never was one to talk about us at least for that i'm grateful look i don't mean to butt in but if you enjoy without a fight at least that's one thing we're going to stand it was more than a fight you want to tell me about  you not now honey my dogs are killing me you maybe later and you kids run along  sharon's been waiting to play with you all afternoon you know get around to it they must last words just type that again i've got a right to come home and relax what am i paying rent for sometimes i wonder just once i could come home without feeling like out of apology god i'm sorry i know you work hard but you're not the only one i didn't mean to sound off on if you see the doc today he says everything's coming new you figure you need help i'll get a part time job and we'll hire a girl joe do we have to wait that long before you start helping and what do you mean so many things are piling up i just can't handle everything anymore and like  the like tommy princeton he's getting out of hand heaven knows what our neighbors think of care what they think we're going to be here forever but we've got to live with them now can't ignore them i wish we could see a lot more of them than we do i should think with all that jazz you're doing and p t a in your church circle you about have your fill of it you'll never understand what you love kani where air force we don't stay long enough in one place to make it worthwhile putting down any religious or getting mixed up in local stuff let's be realistic i am what i see i don't like what do you mean by that i mean maybe it's time we took an honest look at at what's happening to us as individuals and as a family all for the love of la county the dark side i should jimmer you while you're pregnant but let's stick to pickles and ice cream or how about a beer you just think that we starved can we eat and then if you've got a yak about it enters almost ready and i'm almost ready to cry i love you and i have my review for what you're trying to do for the way you feel about the service if only you could look at me and the kids with that same kind of loyalty and willingness to take on responsibilities what are you talking about i'm working like a dog to make a living and if i spend a lot of time out of this because i'm trying to get someplace and for whom for you and the kids what do you mean i don't have any loyalty or sense of responsibility to you i'm not talking about money you've taken good care of the senate way and i know it hasn't been easy sometimes but marriage is supposed to be a sharing not only of love but as all the every day means the kids growing up our friends church everything and you know we don't have that sharing most of the time i feel alone but i'm doing all i can or my supposed to give up god and boycott the n i've been pampering you since you've been pregnant but i'm going to tell you something and you better hear it good i went into the air force i decided to give it all i could to get somewhere i have no know what's going on in this lousy world and i don't like it one of these days the world going to need us guys and i want to be as ready as i can that's my primary mission that's why i work and study and why i'm proud of the fact that i'm the best crew chief at this base so maybe i don't bring you flowers and candy and kiss your hand and i paid a bill when i can just like i set up with them and i do what i can around the bloody hours i've loved and faithful to you and i hope that someday we could have everything a lot better maybe i'm seeing a crooked maybe you're not the woman for me maybe i'm not the guy for you maybe you're just not the kind of woman to be on air force one you know me well i know what i'm getting sick and tired of hearing your yapping about how i've slept responsibilities at home and don't take an interest in the community and don't go to church with you and all that jazz i've got a job to do and i'm doing it the best i know how and if that's not enough for you didn't come back to early this morning didn't say we didn't even speak he just ignored betty maybe there's something wrong on both sides are not perfect but do you think i've been asking for so much do you want me to talk to him now just given what is it i think it's customary to leave a letter when you're calling a marriage qui k let's say whole story joe i couldn't stop or i'm sorry mike i've tried but god is my witness i still don't know what i did that was so wrong maybe you can tell me what did i do that was so wrong and then jump on me here as i've been around this man's air force i've seen a lot of marriages bust up and i've seen a lot of guys crack up i almost didn't watch myself i think they basic reason for most crack up not what a guy does wrong but what he hasn't done right i've been a better family man than most guys and you know my service record has but there's another record that each one of us writes from the moment we're born the one that shows us what we really are and why sometimes we break god your intentions have been good but some of your values have been bad but like ten years of service i've never had any complaints not till the day that you would not need trouble the day of your values at home and been right don't you se man's performance on the job is directly related to his home life we were doing great in the air force and to your family blew up and you blew up on the job it's a chain reaction if any part of a man's life is out of whack effects his entire life like you can't fly a plane successfully with a mouth function is bound to be trouble for the whole climb i see what you mean i guess i might put it this way no man can order us to certain duty but i can orders to put our personal problems in our worries in our hip pocket and if we can't handle our personal problems ok then we become a liability to ourselves into the service the pressure gets too great why am i maybe a guy shouldn't get involved with a family your problem is you didn't get involved enough you didn't really belong to your family as much as you belong your squadron well that's not true  analyze it how much time if you spent with your kids i mean really with them listening to their problems playing helping to shape or growing up you have done as good as most guys always at the same yardstick you to fly you're trying to get ahead in the service just doing as good as most guys what about your kids schooling things like p t a if you really tried to help out be a waste of time and who's going to listen to me is that i get feel when you go to bat for one of your crew that's different yeah in one case you're promoting your career and then the other it's just your family you have a really listen to your wife do you ever give her the same respect and consideration for her problem of making a home for you that you would do a problem on the flight line what about church how often you go with your wife your kids i've had to study i've been trying to get ahead here at the expense of your family and your studies on those niger around and see how clever some of the afternoon to play god oh you're trying to be a real hotshot with a man about your example to your own kids if you want me to go right to make your see it but you couldn't ok so what do i do i suggest you go home to your empty house and look around at everything that you lost pray to god that you can get it back and start again and this time act like a man being a man thanks a lot more than big muscles and fast brain joe thanks an awareness that we're more than animals that we have a conscience and a moral side without a sense of the almighty we're no better than adults maybe worse because we're losing so much that we might have had and i think your wife did you a big you could be the kind of family man that i think you really want to be boils down to this joe it's we're going to make the most out of a one and only life we're ever going to have on this earth we can only do it by really joining the human race every learning to belong to our squadron our community our own and our god to accept all our responsibilities a challenges and through them to grow until we become all that we can become someday you and i may have to put up our lives to show what kind of man we really are that ever happens i want to be ready i want to be ready physically and mentally morally and spiritually i want every chance to win how about you