t good morning i'm mary and i and middlesex district attorney welcome to the premier episode of middlesex update this morning we're going to be talking about one of my favorite prevention educate salon professionals recognize the signs of domestic violence being aware of how to react if they may receive a disclosure of domestic violence and also familiarizes them with resources that are available to domestic violence victims in their communities and very pleased to have joining me this morning our three panelists judith clem quits the super superintendent of michelle by valley technical high school into a white said representing the corporate offices of empire beauty school and ken davis the owner of davis salon in new so thank you all for being here this morning well thank you this cut it out program that came to middlesex county has been rolled out in three different phases we first begin this program by bringing it to our technical schools and educating the students in the salon programs we then went out to the adult beauty schools in the community and ultimately have gone to the private salons so judy i'd like to start with you if you  us a little bit about michelle ballet technical high school and how your school has been to speed in the program well i think i seem to remember the four years ago when you approached me and at the time i think we actually were discussing not only the cut it out program but the dress for success and we talked about it and at the same time i think you and i had discussions in regard to what it is about teenagers and the lack of understanding about the outside world and something that was very important to us was teaching students how not to be so self absorbed and teenagers as we all know spend a great deal of time talking about themselves about their friends about their boyfriends but very little time about talking about the community and how they can give back and if i remember correctly it was our year of giving so it was an ideal opportunity to introduce that type of program because that was our theme for the year so that at that time i think we decided that it was going to be cosmetology and banking marketing and retail so that we were going to set up the ability for the domestic violence to go in to buy clothing excuse me or receive clothing and shoes and accessories and then we were going to have a luncheon in the the restaurant so that they could have a day of just attention to them and how is that work to worry about the program to the school i actually think it's worked out wonderfully i think that it's opened up eyes of students that they never saw before things that they never really recognised that was going on the real world and i actually also think that it brought a community of different programming areas together with the same mission and that was to understand and try to learn about how they can recognise those signs that you talk boat and i think the way you did the program was so significant if you came in earlier in the morning you spoke to all of them in the program areas you told them what the purpose of the program was and at the end of the day they felt with they get really accomplished a lot faster that sense of good citizenship as well as absolutely angela empire is a national organization with a very deep and longstanding commitment to prevention efforts we have three schools in massachusetts and how does partnering with the distributed middlesex district attorney's office on this program fit in your overall mission our overall mission as a company is to create opportunities for people to improve their lives and we do that through education through providing them with the skills they'll need to have a good career in cosmetology but we did recognize ten years ago that there is a strong link between a hairdresser and a woman and one of the most inherent things that females do when they get together is talk and hairdressers in a very unique position to notice signs of abuse and to notice those things that maybe someone in their life would never notice and when we found out about the cut it out program we thought this is absolutely critical to a hairdresser's education not only do they need to know how to cut hair and how to color hair and how to style hair but they also need to know people skills and how to retain a client base and why not know how to help someone who is sitting in their chair who is a need so it just seemed like the perfect fit and we have taken it across our entire system of one hundred ten schools and twenty one states and we partner with local anti domestic violence programs across the country in every single one of our footprints to really try to make sure that we are helping those programs succeed as well as training our stylists on high how to recognize those signs so they can help others and the program where we've brought it out to us schools has been similar to what we've done and in the show but we've come out  stylists had an opportunity to explain to them some of the overview of domestic violence give them an opportunity to ask questions and then educate them about the resources exactly and it's unique because cut it out i believe started  from a stylist salon perspective so it was with salons but it really does reach into the student level the adult student level and the high school student level and then you know for us in the adult student level  sometimes a lot of our students have dealt with this in their own personal lives and so it touches them in a way that maybe a high school or hasn't yet seen in their life but when you're in your early twenty's chances are you've been in a relationship by then maybe it was abusive maybe your parents were you know had some problems so if it turns out to be something that a lot of our students can identify with and truly want to help anyone they can think how well we rolled out this program one of the things that we really wanted to underscore was that which we know to be true which is domestic violence occur as in every strata of our society it cuts completely urban rural all socio economic levels and that was one of the reasons why we were happy to go to us one which was out in newton and really underscore that piece as we went to the community in new in your wife mary that cohen or the very happy and very helpful to us in getting the program started why did that make sense to you as a business owner well we had been doing some fundraising for another domestic violence program and it just seemed like a natural progression from that it was an awesome opportunity to be able to educate our stylists and the rest of our staff on the signs of domestic abuse and we are a business of really asian ships and so you know when you're sitting one on one with a client it becomes an opportunity for the client to  to expose that part of your life and we needed to stylists to be aware of that and to be able to offer opportunities to get help in that situation and you know unfortunately i think domestic abuse people feel that it only happens in urban environments and they really weren't sure that it was happening in an upscale community like new and we wanted to just make that an extension of our business you know because our passion is about the people it was just an extension to to help women and  men have the availability to get help if they needed it did you talk a little bit about what you saw as the program came to the shelter and how you thought it impacted the community what about the other way have you received some feedback from the students in the larger community program it's interesting because i think that to be candid we got a lot of feedback particularly from a number of the articles that were written that appeared in the local newspapers so we got feedback from outside the community but i think that is shared with you a number of years in the past what we have is a small activity even at all of our students do when it's called journaling so each day journal about the experience of the day new technical program it's a way of encouraging more writing skills development even in their technical program so what we usually do is we have them just write about experiences and what i had done and i actually don't think your mind  that last year after the event i shared with marion in the past i think we talked about it but then this year i really wanted to share him with some of the actual notes that i received and i did have them in longhand but i think i've written them out so that i can make sure that i read them to everyone but this was one of the first stand up to clinical it's yesterday was amazing i love the experience we had seeing all those women it first made me want to cry thinking about all the stuff they went through but after talking to them they were so nice there are people just like us seeing all of them at the end of the day so happy made me feel so great it was a great experience thank you yesterday was one of the best days i had in cosmetology the woman i talked to was so nice i enjoyed having that experience i learned how unfortunate people can be and helping that woman named elizabeth was amazing also having lunch at the restaurant was really fun  this was i thought these with the last two ones that i think are most meaningful thank you i thought yesterday was a wonderful experience it taught me not to judge so quickly because you never know what someone else has been through the lunch was wonderful thank you for that as well but it felt so good to make me feel complicated for doing something good and finally i would like to take the time to say thank you for yesterday's experience it was wonderful to be part of something so caring to help these women feel happy and safe is an experience that cannot be described in words it was truly inspiring and encouraged my hope for a better world so then you again it's a great testimonial to the program and also to the generosity of students when you tap into that well and that goes back to what i think i said in the beginning we often criticize teenagers for being self absorbed in not really seeing beyond themselves and being so self involved and i think that the one thing that cut it out program has given them is not only an opportunity to see the world in a different perspective but also to care about somebody else besides themselves and they're so please when they give the women the small little tokens of a gift they put their little makeup packs together that they give them or they put the extensions in there here and these women shining at the end of the day and it's all done with a certain sense of confidentiality at the same time dignity in they did it because we don't want the women to feel challenge we never know exactly how many are going to show up and when you and i have been through it where we expected fifteen and for that particular day only nine could come and the kids just adjust very quickly we have them already and before you know it if there's less women we just do more and will do their nails they'll do their big up and it just winds up to i think to be an experience that i don't think can be replicated in any teaching situation without that kind of real world angela empire has made a commitment to make cut it out an integral part of the curriculum in going forward what's your hope about how your students will bring that out into the world is the professional world really for us it is about giving them the skills that they need to be successful parts of their own communities and that's not just from an economic standpoint obviously we want them to be productive members of our society and of our systems in go out there and have a great career but we also want them to be able to give back to their own communities and each of our schools adopts a local entitle mystic violence program and we truly feel that's critical to our contribution to cut it out because it brings it home for all of these students that we have they see local women who live in their own communities who have gone through this and they are helping those women and they're not helping a big ambiguous national cause they're helping women right in their backyard and i think that that carries on even after you graduate those are memories that you take with you and the skills that they learned through cut it out about you know we're not trying to put anyone in harm's way or get in the middle of something that they shouldn't be getting in the middle of but if they recognise those signs of abuse and all they have to do is hand them a card to the anti domestic hotline that could change a life it could save a life it changes not only the woman's life it could it could say even change the children's lives and for them to understand that one simple act can have such an impact on so many lives is very important for us as a company and we we hope that each one of our students likers through this training walks away with that sense of community involvement and responsibility i as part of the program you agreed to place brochures from some of the helping programs sweet spots of the salon have you received any feedback about that either from your staff or for the clients well we got great feed back when the clients found out that we were becoming involved in the cut out program again just because it's an extension of the community you know it offers a safe place for a client to vent to their stylist and you know i haven't heard any disclosures but i have seen most of our brochures of have disappeared and you know to me that says people are interested and not just women or men that are in abusive situations also ma for you know friends and neighbors that may know of abusive situations that can help too so so it's really a far reaching opportunity for us not just within the salon but extremely as well you mentioned that the brochures seem to be being picked up is that surprised you you know not really i think in an educated community an educated society i think people are interested in that anything that affects women and you know our clientele is probably eighty percent women and i'm not saying that just women are abuse men as well but i think that that in that situation and it's such a supportive thing for any hair salon to get involved in because you know it just gives the clients a feeling of safety of well being and of caring and you know for us again it's about giving back to the p d and giving the availability for these women to get into safe safe situations and be offered opportunities to get help if they needed or want it and also like i said for other people who may know of abusive situations to pass on the information as well having those brochures there and seeing people take them has that helped for you to really sort of put a face or actualize that problem well you know that's a that's a great question i think sure you know again i i said i think you know socio economically people really feel that this happens unfortunately feels that it happens in inner city and doesn't really happen in an upscale community like new and i think that that my staff was was surprised to find that people were interested in it and it was something that went beyond just what they were aware of in different situations that you know you see on t v or whatever and so i think that was surprising for them to to to understand that and see it as well it's a what do you think figure that same question in terms of people suddenly realizing that it's there's a name and a face it's happening right in the place like this one absolutely it's one of those topics unfortunately that is rather taboo still and you know we've come a long way in making more strides with making this particular problem in our society more in the forefront but it is still one of those efforts that seems to go unnoticed or and talked about and for us to be able to bring it out into the forefront is always always so working for us because you see that not a lot of big corporations embrace this particular fight they would you know much rather pick something that's a little more p c you know for whatever reason but to really put this particular topic out there sometimes you know it's something that hasn't always been talked about so for us to see the true recognition we get and to know that it is something that's helping women of all walks of life as you said can just to know that it's not a problem that happens in the inner city it's not a problem that happens in any specific city it's a problem that happens to women and men of all races of all socioeconomic backgrounds and to know that it's something that impacts that many people and something that's not quite talked about as as much should be that is really rewarding for us and she will we speak to the students one of the things as you recall that we stuck to them early on in the presentation about is how many of them have actually known somebody either themselves or a friend or family member that's found themselves in an abusive situation and i'm always struck by the fact that it is probably ninety five percent of those students that raise their hand to say they have some first hand experience to angela's point do you think the program in the conversations around that helped to facilitate the bigger conversation about domestic violence in the school community i think so because i think that even though i understand ken's point and and i have to say we felt the same thing at times because we are a very technical school located in western massachusetts also a considered of a fairly well to do community and we don't have a lot of diversity so we felt that a lot of this may be new but what we were most shocked find out is that they had an understanding of what was going on and fearfully when  would begin her or her presentation to them i remember two distinct things that she talked about she'd say the reason why i'm speaking to you is a cosmetology student was because you have an experience and an ability to talk to victims in the setting where maybe their counterpart is in there because it's the one place where they may go by themselves and i think that to a lot of them i just remember looking and watching them you know kind of thinking and taking every word that she said in that yeah yeah that's right and then when she said to them have you known anyone that has been in an abusive relationship and i think it's a frightening realistic thing for us to all find out particularly in july when you say some of them may not know about it it's frightening to say to you that i see that eighty five percent of them not only know about it that have experienced some abuse even themselves or through a friend and that is why for us we did this almost as a complete package we we did the white ribbon campaign because we found that in is school district where males predominated on that we felt that it was even more important that we do something with them and i think it was through the cut it out program that we face the reality that unfortunately young people are being exposed and experiencing things that maybe we as younger people at least i'm saying that myself i didn't remember that many and i might remember somebody that was abused fervently but not as much abuse and the again i think it's a well well hidden humiliating thing for a woman or a man even more for me and i think to go through so those types of things you don't have a tendency to share so you tie it and then it's by the time somebody else discovers it unfortunate like we all know it's too late that's such a great a great point and i think that educating my staff and my clients to your point about it doesn't just exist on the physical level it can also exist on the emotional level and i think that that was so important for my staff to understand and realize that it is that it is very far reaching it's just not one way and it can affect women in so many men in so many different ways and i think that's one of the things we talked about at the program just the that the domestic violence really is about power and control and we talk to the students and the staff about things like people who are unable to his i was physically unable to be away from their phone you can tell they're frightened will not make a change in their hair color or their hair length less that will tell the stylist i can't do this unless i consult with someone or frantic if their appointment is running over time perhaps worried about how the payment will be made those sorts of things are all things for them to be watching for right and it is we know domestic violence is a major public safety and a public health issue we know that one out of three women will find themselves in an abusive relationship at some time in their life and that's why these public private partnerships are so important both in our ability to extend our resources and address this problem and also to develop in the community whether it be with students or with adults when with client bases