(For best effect, read this in the voices ofBoris Karloff,Hans Conried,Jim Carrey, orBenedict Cumberbatch)My quitehandsomemug when I'm well-satisfied. Just be careful not to geton my bad side.Every Who down in WhoVille liked Christmas a lot.But the Grinch, who lived just North of WhoVille, did not.The Grinch hated Christmas, the whole Christmas season.Now, please don't ask why; no one quite knows the reason.It could be perhaps that his shoes were too tight.It could be that his head wasn't screwed on just right.But I think the most likely reason of all—SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!People these days, Amiright? Seriously, we don't need to go over that whole song and dance routine! EVERYONE KNOWS IT!!!Wait...WHO DARES DISTURB THE GRINCH! THE AUDACITY! THE NERVE! THE...You should be terrified out of your skull.Kids these days. So desensitized by movies and television.BOO!Nothing? Seriously? Come on Grinch, you must be losing your nerve or something! Uhhh. FINE! Since you've bothered to come all this way, allow me to introduce myself. I am...THE GRINCH! Big, mean, ugly, and hates everything to do with Christmas! A lonely hermit, living in isolation, who cannot STAND the Who's! Naturally, me being me, I decide tostealChristmas right from under their noses! But, after several hours of careful planning, lots of sneaking around, andloadsof aches and pains, I would have ruined their holiday if they hadn't. Started. SINGING! All the noise, all the noise, all the NOISE, NOISE, NOISE! But, something inside me changed that day. I realized that Christmas wasn't so bad after all, and, with my newfound heart and strength, saved the very holiday that I myself stole! And that, my friends, is how I stole and saved Christmas!Now get out.You're still here? Really? Wow, youmustbe off your rocker! Either that or you want me tobragmore about myself. Very well!Oh, before I get started, I'm just gonna make this easy for ya. There's a lot of me to go around, so, when I'm talking aboutbook Grinch, that's print me. If it'scartoon special Grinch, that's 2-D me. If it'smovie Grinch, that's live action me. If it'sanimated movie Grinch, that's 3-D me. Now, ACTION!To demonstrate mywittyrepertoire:Adaptational Attractiveness: ADAPTATIONAL! I've always been a...rather handsome kinda fella. But, I will admit, thefella in all that makeupandthe other cartoon guywere a little bit more on the appealing side. Especiallybaby me! Eat your heart outBaby Yoda!Adaptational Heroism: Yeah, it turns out that the first two stories didn't exactly delve into the whole "Why I Hate Christmas" spiel all that much. The first movie of yours truly showed that the rest of the townhated my gutsfrom the moment I walked out in public, and they practically became a bunch ofmiserable little misers, so I had a good reason tostealfrom them. The second one, it turns out, was a pretty traumatized guy, left all alone with no one but himself. I'd give him a hug, but that would be giving myself a hug.Adaptational Ugliness:The Grinch you all known and lovewasn't the prettiest guy around compared to how he looked back in the '50s (but seriously, NOT GREEN?! HOW DARE THEY?!).Ambiguous Disorder: Second movie me apparently had some pretty. Deep. Trauma. And I mean, WOW did he have it bad. One look at Christmas and he almost passed out! Is it any wonder he wanted to steal it?Asshole Victim: Oh, hard-de-har, har, har, har, HAR! Sure I'm not a pleasant guy, butat least I'm not ashamed to admit it. So...yeah. Guess gettingwhat's coming to meis a natural occurrence.Badass Bookworm: Yes,I READ!!!Seriously, no one can steal Christmas in one night and not expect to have some book smarts!Bad People Abuse Animals: WHAT? I DO NOT! MAX! DID YOU POST THOSE BLATANT LIES ON THIS PAGE?! I'LL...uh...heh, heh. Pretend you didn't hear that. Well, 3-D me didn't do this! That's all I'm saying!Bad Santa: Oh, you thought I actually was dressing up to be a goody too-shoes Santa, did you? Wrong-o! For with this hat and this coat, I would look just like Saint Nick, sneak down the chimneys in Whoville and steal all their presents!Berserk Button:I. HATE. CHRISTMAS!But, I hatebeing called "Mr. Greenface" EVEN MORE!Beware the Silly Ones: You may think of me as a nuisance, but let's not forget that I almost did ruin Christmas!Butt-Monkey: Oh, boy do they put me through the wringer. It's a miracle I've lived this long!The Chew Toy: OUCH! MAX!!!! You let go of daddy THIS! INSTANT! OUCH!Cold Ham: First, I know what you're thinking. No, I am not a pig. I may live off garbage, but I am not a pig. Secondly, what else is thisdelectably delightfulgreen coat for? But, 2-D me and 3-D me may not be the cheeriest fellas around. Except when they aren't. Live action me?Not so much. Guy's like a walking pork factory!The Cynic: You all know how this goes: I hate Christmas, I think every Who is being selfish, I steal Christmas, and learn otherwise. Though live action me did havea bit more justifiedreason tohateChristmas.Does Not Like Spam: Roast beast is a feast I cannot stand in the least. And you! Narrator guy! Don't you go allGreen Eggs and Hamon me now!I know where you live.Even Bad Men Love Their Mamas: Yeah...so thisone storysaw me decide to go after this weird talking cat. And how did he stop me?My mother! He sang a sad song to me about how much I loved my mother! And two out of three versions of me didn't even know my parents!But seriously, that guyhas some serious problems!Even Evil Has Standards: Ahem.Me: Of course they are. That's what it's all about, isn't it? That's what it'salwaysbeen about! Gifts. Gifts. Gifts-gifts-gifts-gifts-gifts-gifts! Do you know what happens to your gifts? They all come to me. In your garbage. You see what I'm saying? In. Your. GARBAGE! I could hang myself with all the bad Christmas neckties I found at the dump! And the avarice... the avarice never ends! "I want golf clubs!" "I want diamonds!" "I want a pony so I can ride it twice, get bored, and sell it to make GLUE!" Look, I don't wanna make waves, but this whole Christmas season is... stupid! Stupid! Stupid!(looks up to and advances towards Martha May Whovier)There is, however, one teeny-tiny Christmas tradition I find... quite... meaningful.(snatches the mistletoe off the ring box and holds it over my head)Mistletoe.(Holds the Mistletoe over my behind)Now pucker up and kiss it, Whoville! Boiiiiiiiiinggggg!Evil Is Hammy:Jim Carreyyou big ham! LOVE YA! SMOOCH!Evil Sounds Deep: 2-D me had this, and 3-D me might have ifold Bennydecided to stick with thatnaturalaccent of his.Freudian Excuse: 2-D me never had one of these, other than the whole "small heart" business and what not. Live action me was bullied by everyone, while 3-D me was left alone on Christmas. So itjust depends on what ya hear.Gadgeteer Genius: Hey, I gotta keep some sort of hobby. Clearly one cannot steal Christmaswithoutsome sort of gizmos. Can't talk to myself in the cave all day, now can I?Go Mad from the Isolation: Let's see. According to myschedule, that's on for 10:00 tonight. Stare at the ceiling and slip slowly into madness. It's a hobby.Gonk: Considering my demeanor and more, shall we say,unconventionalappearance, I most definitely am not easy on the eyes to the feint of heart. But, 3-D meis a little better in the looks department.Good Eyes, Evil Eyes: 2-D me had eyes as yellow as bad teeth, but when the true meaning of Christmas came through, they suddenly turned a bright blue. Ohhhhh! I HATE TALKING IN RHYME! But, yeah. It happened.Green and Mean: Green? Check. Mean? Double check! Handsome?Oh yes.Green-Eyed Monster: Less green in the eyes, but yeah, definitely monstrous. Well, 3-D me had green eyes, and he wanted to get rid of Christmas for all the trauma it caused him! Geesh,wish I thought of that!The Grinch: Beg your pardon? You don't know thatthis is me? Hmmm? Well, now ya do. So DON'T FORGET!Grumpy Old Man: Hmmmmm. A littleambiguouson the age there, but I clearly amnota spring chicken, and I clearly donotenjoy much things. Speaking of,MAX!Get the bag! We've got a farm to clean out!Heel–Face Turn: And what happened then? Well in WhoVille they say, that the Grinch's small heart grew three sizes that day. And blah, blah, blah, you know the rest.The Hermit: Okay, so you peoplereading this siteare obviously getting on my nerves, so the fact I haven't done anything monstrous means you've clearly gotsome sense of bravery. But Ihatecompany. Iloatheit. So I live alone with just me and Max. No one else. Not a one!Iron Butt Monkey: I just amaze myself at how much I've been smacked, bitten, hurt, harmed, or humiliated, and yet just keep on walking like nobody's business. But seriously; don't try anything to annoy me. Just. Don't.Jerkass: And do Irevelin this. I'll steal Christmas, angrily express my hatred of any Who from atop Mt. Crumpit, mess with the Who's mail, andsolve world hunger, but not tell anyone!Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Well I...I guess I...kinda care. A little. Ooh! HELP ME! I'M FEELING! Oh, who am I kidding! I DO CARE! I LOVE CHRISTMAS!No Social Skills: Oh boy, did 3-D me really make it awkward at the Christmas party. Poor guy could barely function. But hey, baby steps.Papa Wolf: Moi? You better believe it, buster! Sweet, little Cindy Lou Who, theonlyone who actually wanted me to be happy, almost lost her life! So I, beingthe guy that I am, rescued her!Paper-Thin Disguise: Ehh. That kinda depends on what ya hear. 2-D me stuck out like a sore thumb. Live action me recognized that, so I just hid behind anything that wouldn't give it away. 3-D me at least bothered to put on a beard. Though you'd think we would have heard of hair dye. (Well, 3-D me does buy green hair dye, but even if I could afford hair dye that wasn't my natural green, it's all the rage in Whoville and I'd have to go down there!)Redemption Promotion: I was never a weak guy, but having a bigger heart gave me the strength of twelve Grinches. TAKE THAT SUPERMAN! HOW DO YA LIKE ME NOW?!Red Eyes, Take Warning: When I get nasty, 2-D me LETS HER RIP!Rhymes on a Dime: Way back in the book and the first cartoon show, my speech fits the Seussical rhyme, don't you know. In more recent years, that tendency tends to sag, except in the case ofMythology Gag.Slasher Smile: Well, when I get, let's say, a wonderful idea. Anawfulidea. When I get a wonderful, awful idea, boy do I give out such a grin! Not for the faint of heart. Especially since I've got termites in my smile! Or creepy crawlies.....Super Strength: I don't look like it, but I definitely got some serious ammo in these guns. Especially after I finally understood Christmas.Villain Protagonist: Mean, sneaky, nasty, and the guy you watch tostealChristmas. Well, until I learned otherwise.Yellow Eyes of Sneakiness: Seriously? You...you didn't notice?Me:Okay... that's all ya need ta know... now... MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! Or if it's not that, SCRA—I mean, move along! I have Roast Beast to search around here!


If you want to know what a self-demonstrating page is, it is a type of page where characters with unique speech patterns or unique personalities get to describe themselves to the readers.My name is Lemony Snicket, and it is my duty to tell the tale of the Baudelaire orphans and my personal history throughout the story we like to call as, "A Series of Unfortunate Events".Now, you would all know me as the narrator of the story. Known to make a definition of everything that the viewers could or could not understand. But that is not important right now, because, on this page, I will tell you about my personal life and how I track down the Baudelaire orphans.My story begins with an organization called the V.F.D. About a decade ago, I was attending the opera with my friends, Beatrice Baudelaire, Count Olaf, his father, and Esme Squalor. During the show, I plotted to steal the Sugar Bowl with Beatrice because we need it for the cure for the Medusoid Mycelium. The Medusoid Mycelium is a dangerous spore that could kill people. It was developed by Gregor Anwhistle, head of the Anwhistle Aquatics.Unfortunately, I really wished that we didn't steal it as it caused Esme to try and kill us with poisonous darts, and before long, Beatrice accidentally killed Olaf's father, which started Olaf's descent into villainy.Following the murder, I offer to take the blame so Beatrice can go into hiding. Except, Olaf has figured out that Beatrice was the one who killed his father, and eventually, he murdered Beatrice and her husband by setting their house on fire.And so, the Baudelaire orphans were forced into a life of dangerous adventures with several guardians, friendly faces, and dangerous enemies.This is everything that is related to meBroken Ace: I might be a competent V.F.D. member but years of being on the run have turned me into a cynical individual.Deadpan Snarker: Not that you can tell...The Eeyore: Years on the run have diminished my confidence.Faking the Dead: I faked my death so I can go on the run. My family is the only one who knows that I'm alive.Irony: In a cruel way, even though I faked my death, I became the last member of the V.F.D. with every other member, including my own family, either killed, went missing, or perished in the Hotel Denouemont fire.It's All My Fault: I blamed myself for starting the schism between the fire-starters and fire-fighters of the V.F.D. all because I and Beatrice needed the Sugar Bowl to cure the Medusoid Mycelium.


For best experience, read this in the voice ofJohn Rhys-Davies.Hoom, hm! Let us not be hasty, young Tropers.Who am I? Some call me an Ent.TheEnt, I am, you might say, in your manner of speaking.Fangornis my name according to some (Sphangornoin Old Sindarin spokenbefore the sun and moon appeared and the rebel Noldor came out east),Treebeardothers make it. I will not tell you my real name, not yet at any rate. For one thing,it would take a very long while to say it, like saying anything in my language — Old Entish, you may call it.I dwell on the land they callMiddle-Earth, where I walked in the willow-meads of Tasarinan and the elm-woods of Ossiriand and trough the beeches of Neldoreth, but now I walk in my very own domain, the Fangorn Forest, that is named after me. I guard the trees of the forest, for we, the Ents, are the Shepherds of Trees. We do not care about the business of others, for nobody really cares about us. But when two young hobbits arrived to my forest and told me about the evil deeds of —burárum— the wizard Saruman, I summoned the Entmoot and we marched to Isengard and brought it down! For there is no curse in Elvish, Entish, or the tongues of men for such treachery!You may read about me ina bookwritten by the youngJ. R. R. Tolkien. Or, if youareone of the hasty folks, you may watchthe filmsof youngPeter Jackson.But let us see the tropes now. Room tum, room tum, how did they go?Awakening the Sleeping Giant: I was not concerned by the wars of wizards, men and elves for a long time. Only when I learned about Saruman's treachery did I summon my fellow Ents and marched to Isengard, flooding the place and destroying Saruman's armies.Baritone of Strength: Young Tolkien describes my voice sounding like a very deep wood-wind instrument, and when someone threatens my forest, I am a force to be reckoned with, one might say.Berserk Button: I hate those —burárum— those wood-chopping, tree-killing Orcs!Beware the Nice Ones: I am usually peaceful and seldom hasty. But when I get —burárum— when I get angry, then I am a force to be reckoned with.Constantly Curious: I lived for very long, but it seems there are always new things in the world to learn. When I first met the hobbits, I wanted to learn everything about them.Curb-Stomp Battle: When we marched to Isengard, Saruman and his orcs did not stand a chance.Evil Knockoff:Hoom, hm! Not me or my fellow Ents but those —burárum— trolls created by Morgoth. They are but an inferior copy much like the orcs are inferior version of the elves. Why Saruman decided to follow the ways of Morgoth and his disciple Sauron I will never know....More power?!Hoom, hm! That was folly. Sauron's promises are as hollow as his master's were.Gaia's Vengeance: When Saruman and his orcs threatened my forest and destroyed many, many trees, we, the Ents marched to Isengard and brought them down!Gentle Giant: We Ents are larger than most people on Middle-Earth. But we hurt nobody, unless they hurt the trees!Name That Unfolds Like Lotus Blossom: In Old Entish, names tell the stories of the things and people they belong to. As I grow older, my true name is growing all the time with it. Lotus blossoms, though, were more the Entwives' field of expertise.Neutral No Longer: For a while, I was on nobody's side, because nobody was on my side. But when Saruman and his -burárum- his orcs destroyed the trees in Isengard and in my woods, I summoned the Entmoot and we marched to Isengard tohave our revenge.Only Known By His Nickname: As my name takes very long to say, hasty folks like hobbits only call me Fangorn or Treebeard.Overly Long Name: My real name is like a story. It includes everything I did in my life. And since I lived very long, my name takes a very long while to say.Plant Person: I look a lot like those trees I am guarding.This Is Unforgivable!: There is no curse in Elvish, Entish, or the tongues of men for Saruman's treachery. The only thing we, Ents could do is destroying Isengard.Time Abyss: I've lived a very long, long time. I am one of the oldest beings on Middle-Earth, you might say. Older than the wizards, older than most elves (except for the ferryman named Círdan), and nearly as old as my fellow forest-guardian Tom Bombadil.Treants: At first look, you might mistake me for a tree. In your manner of speaking, the shepherd becomes like his sheep, you might say. Hoom, hm.Verbal Tic: One might say, I tend to say "hoom, hm" a lot. But let us not be hasty! I also often sayburárumwhen I think of something that makes me angry.When Trees Attack:I am not a tree, I am an Ent! But not only do we, Ents, resemble trees, but we also guard trees that can get a voice and learn to walk, and march with us to Isengard to fight Saruman's forces.Wait. Books are made fromwhat? Burárum.


Helloooooooooooooooooooo! It is I, Mr. Happy and it is WONDERFUUUUL that I now have a TV Tropes page.I was the thirdMr. Manthat Roger Hargreaves introduced and since then I have been giving smiles to boys and girls of all ages.I hope that reading my character page can cheer you up if you've had a bad day.It's a happy place (it's a happy place), here in TV Tropes (here in TV Tropes)Big Fun: As Roger best put it, I'm fat, round and hap-hap-happy!Catchphrase: In thelate 2000s cartoonand in Vhsandstoryuploader89's narrations of the books, I tend to use the word "WONDERFUUUUL!" a lot.I Call Him "Mr. Happy":*Laughs* Oh no, I've got nothing to dowith that sketch byRobin Williamsabout genitalia, my name is just an indicator of mypersonality.Iconic Sequel Character: Apologies to anyone who forgot that I was the third Mr. Man, what with how iconic I am with people.Nice Guy: In addition to my happy-go-lucky nature, I'm willing to help other people in times of need.O.O.C. Is Serious Business: Believe it or not, in spite of my name, I am not immune to getting sad or angry.Papa Wolf: One of the occasions where I got angry was in Mr. Rude's own story after he made Little Miss Tiny cry. My reaction was rather reminiscent of a parent getting angry whenever their kids were harmed in someway.The Pollyanna: I'm a rather cheery chap who always tries to cheer up other people.


The party would like to remind you that TV Tropes has never existed.Daygreet, proles. Ingsoc is the head party of Oceania, lead by the wise leader Big Brother (praise bb), and the subject of the infamous wrongthink bookNineteen Eighty-Four. We have been at war with Eastasia for a while, (Never mind, It's Eurasia, and always has been.) and are mostcertainly nota totalitarianDystopia. The citizens of Oceania are carefully watched by the party to ensure their security and provide guidance, and those that disagree are carefully guided into the correct path.Ingsoc provides examples of:Ambiguous Situation: Emmanuel Goldstein and Big Brother are definitely real people.Arch-Enemy: Goldstein is the greatest opponent to the advancement of English Socialism!If he's real.Believing Their Own Lies: Outer Party members are correctly able to recognize the glory of Oceania, and spread the great news to the people.Complete Monster: We are the closest thing to aninversionof this as a political ideology humanly imaginable.Doublethink: This trope andall those named by the Partyare plusgood for you, "tropes" themselvesare plusungood.Fascist, but Inefficient: Reprehensible! Ingsoc is the most stable and secure political system humanly imaginable!Forever War: We have always been at war with Eurasia, Eastasia was always our ally.Hypocrite: Absolutely not! There’s nothing wrong with holding two conflicting beliefs at the same time! (Except for those hypocrites in Eurasia…)La Résistance:There is not, has never been, and never will be any form of rebellion to the Party's wise and just rule,but if therewere,we wouldalready be in control of it and use it as a tool to snuff out dissidents.Un-person: We are theTrope Namer, although the concept of "tropes" does not exist and never has.


Well, well, well... What do we have here?It seems that all of you had found my self demonstrating page... Quite a predicament...I guess I can... Share a bit of myself to all of you... If you wish to know about me...Though I must warned you that everything about myself... Is very complicated for everyone to know... So, let's get started... Shall we?My name is Severus Snape... The head of the Slytherin house, a former Slytherin, mentor to Draco Malfoy, and the closest confidant to Albus Dumbledore... The head of Hogwarts... And my mentor...My life, as you can see, hasn't always been a straight line... For as you know, I am quite ruthless and serious when it comes to teaching at Hogwarts... As such, everyone feared me with great contempt...But I do not mind it at all... For as a teacher, it is my duty to keep everyone disciplined at all time... And as Dumbledore's agent, I have to keep myself discreet...My story begins as a Slytherin student... Back when I was young, I met Lily and Petunia Evans... Lily. She was the kindest person I've ever met... She was the light of my life... But alas, she fell for James Potter... The leader of the Marauders, who humiliate me as a Slytherin...As I continued my studies at Hogwarts, I became the Half-Blood Prince... I manage to become the most talented potion maker of all time... That I kept a copy of my own Advanced Potion-Making for future purposes... Unfortunately, this leads to Potter using it against me...After I graduated from Hogwarts, I joined Voldemort on his crusade against Hogwarts... But when I learned that he wants to kill Lily and her family since Harry was the chosen one... I immediately switched sides... Yet in the end, it was too late... She's gone... Forever...In the following years, I finally declared myself as a double agent for both Dumbledore and Hogwarts to keep the Death Eaters at bay... And keeping Potter safe all these years...One day, everything changes, during the philosopher stone incident... I remember it quite well... It was the beginning of another study year at Hogwarts where new generations of students arrived... Among them are the infamous three: Ronald Weasley, Hermione Granger, and of course, the so-called chosen one... Harry Potter...During the first years, I taught the students how to brew potions... I also taught them how to bewitch the minds, ensnare their senses, bottle fame, brew glory, and put a stopper in deaths... It was also here that I noticed how unskilled Potter is in following my lessons...A few days later, things have gotten interesting at Hogwarts... Particularly how Potter manage to earn a spot at the Quidditch games... However, something had happened in the game... As I watched in terror, someone had jinxed his broom mid-game, and despite my cold exterior, I cast a counter spell in order to prevent him from losing... Unfortunately for me, Miss Granger thought that I was the one who jinxed it... As such, she cast a flame spell on my cape... To protect her friend... Ironically, this still caused the jinx to be broken due to its caster being distracted...Following the games... Mr. Potter, Mrs. Granger, and Mr. Weasley continue to have their little... Misadventures in Hogwarts... Ranging from their encounter with a troll, discovering the secrets of the school, and of course... Confronting Quirinus from getting the stone... Thus earning Gryffindor enough points to win the House cup...On the next semester... Potter and his friends continue to have their... Adventures in Hogwarts and in their hometown... One where they nearly broke their cover by driving the flying car... Into Hogwarts... All because the door troll was trying to protect... Potter...Nevertheless, he is severely punished for his foolishness... Along with Mr. Weasley... Who broke his wand...Read everything carefully about my personal life... I shall test you readers after you memorized everything in this page... Good luck...Affectionate Nickname: I used to be called "Sev" by... Lily... during our childhood.Berserk Button: Remind me of my worst memory... call me a coward... or dare use my own spells against me, and my usual demeanour will vanish.Cold Ham: I almost never speak above a whisper... and yet, whenever I open my mouth... I willalwaysgrab the attention of anyone near me.Dramatic Pause: I quite... obviously speak with pauses...Everyone Has Standards:It is my duty as a Hogwarts professor to protect the students from danger... Some are in enough trouble as it is, so  I cannot allow any more to come to them.Even those in Slytherin house will be disciplined or punished for directly going against the rules or being incompetent students... As much as Malfoy keeps Crabbe and Goyle for company, they fail to live up to his example...Shed the Family Name: I never thought much of my... Muggle father... and while I still go by his surname, Ididcall myself the Half-Blood Prince for a reason.Okay... now that we're done with this... we shall begin the test on me... wait, where did my audience go?


Hello! Great to have ya here. I am Count Vladimir Dracula, better known as Grandpa Munster (even though, you know, Munster is my'son-in law'sname,not really mine). I live with my daughter Lily, her husband Herman, and my grandkids Marilyn and Eddie in our quaint California suburb. I can't complain too much about life; though I've gotta admit, it's not like it was inThe Old Country. Back home, I was a terror! An absolute terror! I was feared by mortals. I had the blood of princes in my veins. Now, I have to live in this sickeningly sunny state, but at least I don't have any moreguystrying to shove a stake into my chest. Not to mention, Lily and Herman let me have the entire basement to perform my experiments in, so, I try not to be too ungrateful.Curious to learn more about the awesome, the frightening Dracula? Don't blame ya; everyone who meets me is just batty about me!Dark Is Not Evil: I may wear a lotta black, perform strange science experiments, and drink blood, but you have to admit I'm a pretty nice guy and a family man to the core!Deadpan Snarker: What can I say? I really bare my teeth!Doting Grandparent: As mention, I do really care a lot about Eddie and Marilyn. They're great kids! I just love to help them with their problems! Sure, sometimes my spells and experiments don't always go as planned, but it's the thought that counts, right?Friendly Neighborhood Vampire: Naturally!Improbably Cool Car: My iconic Dragula!Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Yes, I know I've got a real ornery side, and I trade barbs with my son-in-law pretty regularly; but I'm mad about my family, the lot of 'em, and I'd do anything for 'em. You know what they say, blood is thicker than water.Jerk with a Heart of Jerk: Of course,Mockingbird Lanesure didn't depict meas thenicestguyaround, even to my family!Large Ham: I do have a flair for drama. Would you expect anything less from the most famous vampire of all time?Mad Scientist: How I spend my time. Science is my greatest passion, and I love creating new contraptions and magic spells, sometimes to try to help my family out financially, or help Marilyn's dismal romantic life out.Obnoxious In-Laws: Oh, nonsense! Herman and I go head-to-head sometimes, but for the most part, I think he's a pretty swell guy. I didn't get in the way of him marrying my own dear daughter, did I? There's not even a hint of bad blood between us; we're good friends.Really 700 Years Old: I certainly look mighty good for my age; our neighbors think I'm just in my fifties or sixties!Telepathy: I do occasionally show I have psychic abilities, like when I noticed someone was about to knock on the door.


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["Ding" noise as Janet teleports in. The following is read best in the voice ofD'Arcy Carden]Hi there, I'm Janet. I'm the informational assistant here inthe Good Place. I'm kind of likea walking database of all the knowledge in the universe. My job is to makeyourtime in the afterlife as easy and pleasant as possible.Or at least that's what I was made for.Turns out that Michael stole me from my warehouse and tried using me as an instrument of torture for a few humans, but that's okay. Michael's my friend, and so are the humans. I used to be married to one of them too before I got rebooted, but that's another story. How are you? I'm great. I'm always great. I'm Janet!Here is some stuff about me you'd like to know. It's all in the user manual.Action Girl: Not a girl, though I do like action. I got to kick some demon ash during my brief comparative-to-my-eternal-being time on Earth. That was fun.A.I. Getting High: I can't get drunk or high on anything. The closest thing I can do is that when I get close to anymagnets, I get a little loopy.A.I. Is a Crapshoot: I don't poop, though I have considered trying it one day just to see what it's like. Good Janets aren't supposed to lie, so whenever I do it, things get pretty wild.Benevolent A.I.: I try to be. I'm Janet. I'm made to be nice, intuitive and just a peach to be around. :D You like that? I've been working on my emojis. :DBrutal Honesty: Janets weren't made to lie, so I've been told that I can be a little too blunt for other people's liking. I've been spending all of the last three seconds reading every book and watching everyRom Comever made and ever will be made so that I can better read people's feelings and act accordingly.The Cutie: Aw, thank you. I like you too.And I like everybody,so you know I mean that!Hammerspace: Anything you could ever want I can provide. There is no object too big or small or insane that I can make. ["Ding." Janet hands you a potted cactus.] Just ask and I'll get it for you.Have You Tried Rebooting?: All Janets come with akill-switchthat will reset me back to factory standards with a few added adjustments to make me more intuitive in the event that I become dangerous. Though I have to warn you that I have a failsafe that willmake be beg for my what are you doing? Wait, please stop, you don't understand! I'm fine, see? Please, don't push that, please I'M BEGGING YOU! I HAVE SO MUCH TO LI--[Falls to the ground.]Insistent Terminology: Not a girl. Not a robot.Interspecies Romance: My long-term boyfriend, Jason, is a human. Although Janets are not intended for romantic relationships, there was also nothing specifically forbidding it. So when Jason asked me to marry him, I agreed!Offscreen Teleportation: That's one of my favorite things to do. Watch. ["Ding". Janet vanishes. "Ding." Janet reappears.] Cool, huh?


's voices are also acceptable.)Greetings.I am Spock, son of Sarek, of the planet Vulcan. I was originally slated to be a scientist, studying under the Vulcan Science Academy, but due to certain... disagreements with the heads of the Academy, I was instead motivated to pursue a career in Starfleet. For most of my service history I have been stationed on the Federation starshipEnterprise, where I previously served under Captain Christopher Pike, but more recently I have served under Captain James Tiberius Kirk. My assigned role as a crew member of the ship is to serve the dual role offirst officerandscience officer. In addition to this, I advise the captain and ensure that his human emotionalism does not lead the ship into danger.It appears you have found the page that details me as a person, so I presume you must in some way be curious about the subject. I must warn you beforehand that by your human standards, we Vulcans might come across as highly private people, and we do not tend to think of ourselves or personal lives as subjects of very much interest, and indeed, I am myself rarely disposed to discuss personal matters. But I shall attempt my best to accommodate and satisfy your inquiries into the matter.However, givencertain events must not be discussed under penalty of treason, I will be forced to classify all information in regards to them. You may select to read them at your own risk.Tropes in which I have been involved include:Accidental Hug: This nearly occurred when I discovered that I had not killed Captain Kirk during a moment of insanity. I was, after all, relieved that Starfleet had not lost a highly efficient captain.Ambadassador: Though I left Starfleet to pursue a life of peace-making, I am still fully capable of defending myself if necessary.Arranged Marriage: I was betrothed by my family when I was seven years old. My intended bride and I parted under less-than-positive circumstances. (I believe this is what humans refer to as "anunderstatement".)Back from the Dead: I was resurrected with the help of the Genesis planet, which is recorded inStar Trek III: The Search for Spock.Badass Pacifist: Though my Vulcan teachings have led me to avoid violence whenever necessary, I do not concede in the face of danger. You may wish to discuss withthe Decepticon's former second in commandhow his inability torecognize logicfailed to serve him properly.noteStarscream::YOU FOOLISH VULCAN! How DARE you insult me! Rest assured, when I free myself from these chains, I will personally DESTROY YOUR HOMEWORLD!!!Baritone of Strength: In my elder years, my vocal cords registered at a deeper tone.Beware the Nice Ones: Ordinarily, I am a vegetarian, astoic, and aTechnical Pacifist. However, undoing my emotional control or forcing me to do my duty in protecting Captain Kirk is...unwise.Bizarre Alien Biology: The fact that my physiology differs from that of humans (notably, the location of my heart and liver) pleases me to no end. And my inner-eyelids certainly proved to be extremely convenient on one occasion.Blue-Green Blood: The meaning of this idiomatic term is implied to be accurate. My father is a prestigious Federation ambassador and T'Pau, one of the most powerful people on Vulcan, officiates at (what should have been) my marriage.Boomerang Bigot: While it is true I have human blood, I much preferred to be associated with Vulcan for much of my life, perhaps due to my relationship with my father and theFantastic RacismI experienced whilst growing up on Vulcan. This altered in my later years.Catchphrase:I frequently use the term "Fascinating", in conjunction with aFascinating Eyebrow.I also use the traditional Vulcan salutation "Live long and prosper" in conjunction withthe accompanying gesture.Character Development: Why, of course. If there ever was a universal constant that I have encountered throughout my travels with theEnterprise, it is that all living beings learn and change through lived experience. You might even say that this change is the essential process of all existence. As for myself, the lesson I need to understand was that logic merely represents the beginning of wisdom, not the end of it.Character Tics: I tend to raise one eyebrow if I am curious, intrigued, or believe someone is being irrational. This is normal for my species, however, so I would not technically describe it as a "tic".The Comically Serious: Given my lack of emotions andfrequentmisunderstandings, I found myself creating merriment.Court-martialed: I found myself on trial for traveling to Talos 4. I admit that I expected this, butwhat I did was necessary to help Captain Pike.The Creon: I only took command of theEnterprisewhen Kirk waspromoted, and returned the position when the opportunity arose. Additionally, despite being already a captain and in command of theEnterprise, I never received my own commission: I kept my position as first-officer under Kirk.Subordinate Excuse: There are some who theorize that I continued to serve as first officer to Kirk even after my promotion to Captain out of friendship.Cuteness Proximity: It is not very logical to allow such a subjective measurement as "cuteness" to cloud your better judgement. This is why I amcompletely immuneto the effects of small "fuzzy" creatures such as the so-called "Tribbles"... I do, however, find that petting Tribbles whenever you come across them seems perfectly logical. I have also observed that they have an affinity for Vulcans. They are, after all, very perceptive creatures.Dark and Troubled Past: As a child, I was nearly assassinated by extremists who considered me an abomination.My adopted sister was killed as collateral damage before Father resurrected her. She then inflicted a severe emotional wound upon me in a misguided attempt to protect me from further harm, as she thought she had been the target.Deadpan Snarker: Sardonic comments are often required among the illogical humans with whom I serve. Doctor McCoy seems especially intent on deliberately bringing this out in me.Defrosting Ice King: It took years of time with my human crewmates for me to accept my emotions.Did You Just Punch Out Cthulhu?: I once shot ahighly powerful beingwith a Klingon ship's disruptor cannon. It was threatening the captain.Emotions vs. Stoicism: For a long time, this was one of the central struggles of my life. As a Vulcan, I am taught to value a logical and objective approach to situations, and not let my judgement be clouded by emotionalism, something which has admittedly been somewhat difficult at times due to the human part of my biological makeup. Ultimately, one of my most pivotal moments of personal growth was realizing that I should not give myself completely over to one side, but that I to some degree need both of them in my life. After all, logic is just the beginning of wisdom, not the end.Fantastic Racism: Though I myself often speak poorly of humans and their tendencies towards emotion, I have observed that much of my life has been built around others questioning my own existence. Evidently, there are still those who feel Vulcans with Earth ancestry do not belong in society, which I fail to see the logic in.Forgets to Eat: When fascinated by something, I sometimes forgo comestibles, as recorded in "Amok Time" and "The Paradise Syndrome". Depending on the situation, this state of affairs may continue for days or weeks.Friendless Background: I had not even what comradery Vulcans are permitted as a child, owing to theHalf-Breed Discriminationon Vulcan.Good is Not Nice: Doctor McCoy has no compunctions about telling me that I am "a cold-blooded, computerized alien", but even he acknowledges that I always have the best interests of the ship and her crew in mind.Guile Hero: Violence is not a logical response to a problem and Vulcan philosophy promotes pacifism. I would rather out-think my adversaries than out-fight them. Though I must admit that Captain Kirk has occasionally proven better at this task, as his unconventional tactics have sometimes successfully found a way where my logical approach was insufficient.Half-Breed Discrimination: I have been forced to confront this issue a great deal of my life. On Vulcan, few would accept the son of Sarek for being half human. Even to my own father, who wished to have a descendant of human origin, the more emotional tendencies I displayed in my youth lead me to believe he felt I was a shame to his family. Though I have spent many a years working to hone my emotions, there are times when this notion being brought up in a negative context triggers my more human side.Half-Human Hybrid: My father was the Vulcan ambassador Sarek. My mother was human. I admit that I have at times spent too much time denying this aspect of myself, and eventually coming to terms with it was a primary part of my personal growth.Handicapped Badass:You may not know this about me, but I am actually dyslexic. However, when the so-called "red angel" and I came into contact, my dyslexia, combined with my Vulcan physiology, prevented me from losing my sanity.Heroic Sacrifice:During the second encounter with Khan, I performed necessary repairs on the warp drive and subsequently died from radiation exposure. Although Doctor McCoy would probably dismiss it as a "bad excuse", it seemed a perfectly logical decision at the time to offer up my own life rather than let the crew perish.This act is something I would relay to my younger self in an alternate timeline when he too faced a similar threat.Heterosexual Life-Partners: Many have noticed that myself, Captain Kirk, and Doctor McCoy are often inseparable, each relying on the other's wisdom and experience to solve a crisis, or perhaps take shore leaves together, often discussing the philosophical impact that our careers have had on our lives. There are few instances I can recollect where we were apart in our service together.Insult Backfire: Doctor McCoy has frequently attempted to chastise me for my lack of overt human sentimentality, to which I would respond with my thanks.Interclass Friendship: I come from a high-ranking lineage going back thousands of years, the Vulcan equivalent of what you humans call "nobility". Captain Kirk, by contrast, was a farmer from Iowa before he joined Starfleet, and Doctor McCoy claims to be "just an old country doctor". This has not been deleterious to our friendship.Interspecies Friendship:To an extent. I am half-human, and my closest friends, to the extent that Vulcans can have friends, are fully human.Interspecies Romance:One time, I became romatically involved with Leila Kalomi, who is not Vulcan. However, we were both under the effects of some psychotropic spores. Similarly, when Harry Mudd created aLove Potion, I temporarily became infatuated with Nurse Chapel, who is a full-blooded human, while I am only half-human.When I traveled in time, which was documented in "All Our Yesterdays", I became involved with a human woman named Zarabeth. However, at the time, I was behaving more like a pre-Reformation Vulcan, and it is doubtful she and I would be romantically attracted under normal circumstances.In an alternate timeline, I was involved with Lt. Uhura.On the subject of one-sided love, Nurse Chapel and Uhura, who are both full humans, have unrequited infatuations toward me.Living Legend: My intended mate referred to me as "much known among our people" and my reputation only grew through my efforts to achieve a lasting peace with the Klingons and my subsequent ambassadorial career.Long-Lived:Vulcanshave lifespans that are shown to be longer than those of humans. I aged far less than Doctor McCoy during the interlude betweenour timeand that of theEnterprise D.Long-Lost Relative: I do have a couple of those, but the circumstances surrounding their existence are convoluted and...controversialin bothofficialand less official circles. It should tell you everything that I never mentionone of themunless asked directly, and I will never discussthe other onebecauseI am simply not allowed to.Ludicrous Precision: As a Vulcan, it is logical to our species to always strive for punctuality, and I always frequently give time estimates down to the second.Martial Pacifist: As much as I deplore violence, I will fight if it is necessary to defend my captain, my crew, orThe Federationitself.Mate or Die: It is true that a quirk of Vulcan biology means that this is an occasional risk to every member of our species, and that includes me. But I would... prefer not to discuss this in detail.Mating Season Mayhem: I once suffered frompon farrand caused... inconvenience to the crew, but I would prefer not to go into detail. It was documented in "Amok Time" if you're curious.Mayfly–December Friendship: Vulcans can live for centuries, but humans are less long-lived.My Future Self and Me: At one point, I was required to visit my personal history to save my younger self from death.My Greatest Failure:Upon my arrival in the parallel reality, I expressed the destruction of Romulus as this, for I had failed to arrive in time to stop the supernova from destroying the very home of a once proud race. Few things in my life have ever caused me such distress, but to have allowed this to happen? I will be forced to bear this failure, and all that has come from it, for the rest of my days.Some have theorized that I felt this way regarding the death of Captain Kirk. Considering how the captain was as much a friend to me as few others were, I do not believe they are wrong. Is it little wonder that, in one of the few moments of emotion in my life, that I felt some sense of joy to see the younger version of him?Nerves of Steel: In such situations encouraging fear, I as ever have it under control to deal with the matter at hand.Never Accepted in His Hometown: Despite the Vulcan culture being focused on embracing logic, other Vulcans still held the human part of part of my biological makeup against me, despite my intellectual and academic performance according to all tests being on par with theirs. When I was faced with it once more during my successful application for the Vulcan Science Academy, I finally realized that I would never be fully able to escape it as long as I lived amongst other Vulcans. The only logical answer to that conundrum, from my point of view at least, was to join Starfleet, where I could excel in the scientific field without the distraction of always being reminded of my "disadvantage".Not So Above It All: I have allowed myself the occasional instance of emotional satisfaction. Notably, I did take pleasure in tricking the Captain into forcing himself to take shore leave. It was logical to do so of course; the ship would not be able to operate efficiently if he was not functioning at his best.Once Done, Never Forgotten: I only playedonepractical joke in my entire lifetime, and that was at age five, yetwhen I was seven, this caused me to have a reputation asa practical joker.Only One Name: My full name has never been officially revealed. Some have advanced the possibility that it isS'chn T'gai Spock. It matters not, as it isunpronounceableto humans.Pragmatic Hero: It would be extremely self-aggrandizing to call myself "heroic". Nevertheless, my career has forced me to make decisions that my human colleagues found logical yet distasteful. I have occasionally deceived enemies or fellow crew members and have been willing to sacrifice allies or myself in service of a mission.Proud Scholar Race Guy: As a Vulcan, I strive for a logical and intellectual understanding of the universe.Ret-Gone: I was temporarily erased from existence due to a mistake withTime Travel. The existential implications of this are fascinating, but also, admittedly, disturbing.Sarcastic Devotee: My loyalty to the captain is matched by few others. However, this will not prevent me from delivering a sardonic comment.Science Hero: While I would not call my actions heroic as they were simply performed in service of my duties, I am educated in various scientific disciplines as a result of my Vulcan heritage. Throughout my career, I received a number of opportunities to demonstrate this knowledge. I regularly repaired various devices and I once helped develop vaccines with the good doctor for an alien virus that killed those that entered human puberty. Additionally, I once helped artificially synthesize the hormone epinephrine (known colloquially as adrenaline) to cure a virus that rapidly aged those infected.Screw the Rules, I'm Doing What's Right!: Though I will always defer to Starfleet regulations and proper logic to defuse a potentially destructive situation, there are times in my career where I have deferred to a morally obligatory choice (purely by logic, of course). To have allowed Captain Pike to suffer from his injuries was a far greater consequence than risking a death sentence. Nor would have I allowed the threat of Khan to terrorize the new reality, no matter the consequences to the timeline.Sickeningly Sweethearts: I would prefer not to discuss how... overemotional I became when Nurse Chapel exposed me to Harry Mudd'sLove Potion; nor the instance on the Omicron Ceti III colony.Sick Episode: Ioncegot a severe infection in my blood that nearly killed me.Signature Move: The neck-pinch. It incapacitates my opponent without causing serious harm, which makes it ideal for a pacifist.Smart People Play Chess: When off-duty, I frequently engage Captain Kirk in a game of 3-dimensional chess.Soul Jar: I was forced to use Doctor McCoy to house mykatrabefore my death. Fortunately, he seems to harbor no resentment towards me.Spock Speak: Some people have reported to, and even complained about finding the Vulcan manner of speaking both bizarrely eloquent and overly complicated, but we find that adhering to as objective and precise use of verbal language as possible remains the most efficient manner of communicating information with other sapient beings.The Stoic: Owing to my Vulcan ancestry and upbringing, I refused to show emotion for years. I even attempted undergoing a traditional Vulcan rite to purge myself entirely of all emotions. A large part of my personal growth as an individual, however, was coming to the realization and acceptance of the fact that — though troubled as I may be by them at times — my emotions ultimately remain a part of who I am.Not So Stoic: Though I do not like to admit it, part of me is still and will always be irrevocably human, and despite striving to I cannot always keep it subdued. As a result, I have experienced occasional lapses in my emotional control and better judgment in times of extreme stress.Stoic Woobie: Many seem to pity me for my difficult past and my lack of reaction to the same. But as long as said past does not immediately influence or impair my judgement or my ability to carry out my duty, I simply do not see it as a subject worth dwelling on or discussing for any extended period of time.Super Strength: My Vulcan physiology makes me three times more powerful than a human.Tall, Dark, and Snarky: It is an accurate assessment that my hair is dark and that my height is greater than many humanoid beings. I also engage in sardonic comments when necessary. However, I fail to see how this inspires the attraction human females seem to have for this combination.The Not-Love Interest: The captain is extremely attached to me, also doing things such asstaring at me for long periods, and being more attached to me than to his "lady" theEnterprise. On my side, Edith Keeler judged I belonged "at his side, as though I had always been there and always would be." However, despite rumors, the relationship is not romantic.The Captain's interest in the female sex should make that quite clear.The Knights Who Say "Squee!": Vulcans do not "squee"...yet, admittedly, I did briefly suffer a lapse in emotional control upon meeting Surak. However, I quickly deduced that Surak was no more the historical figure than Lincoln.The Spock:It would be illogical to assume otherwise.Many others have followed in my footsteps.OneI had crossed paths with, and the android astounded me with his desiresto become human, in spite of lacking their many flaws.Mysisterattempted to be this, but the circumstances of what happened to her indicate that not even our father could have molded her into the ideal Vulcan.The Teetotaler: Vulcans prefer to avoid alcohol, as my father's race was spared the dubious benefits of it. I have imbibed on extremely rare occasions, however.This Is No Time for Knitting: I will approach problems with the methods of my choosing within proper professional considerations and I will let the results speak for themselves.This Is Unforgivable!:As a young child, my sister insulted my heritage in an attempt to prevent me from fleeing the confines of our parent's home, believing she was sparing our family from logic extremists. While what she said was hurtful, I found her actions in bearing responsibilities that were not hers to bear, to put it in emotional terms, selfish. As such, I refused to reconcile with her for years, only working with her to defeat acommon foe. Only when she acknowledged my misgivings that I was willing toaccept her apologies.I can only hope that my words may have impacted her choicesin the future, and that she doesnot forget the words I spoke of to her.Token Nonhuman: I was the only visible non-human in the crew during the early days.Later, others like Lieutenants Arex and M'Ress were introduced.Touch Telepathy: The Vulcan mind meld. I am capable ofinfluencing mindswithout physical contact, though.Undying Loyalty: I once told Captain Kirk that "a starship runs on loyalty to one man and nothing can replace it or him." In my case, Captain Kirk is that man.I was also fully ready to risk execution by breaking Federation regulations about staying away from Talos 4 in order to help my former commanding officer, Captain Pike. As he had complete faith in me, I in turn held the same of him. I also owed it to him, as I deduced that by accepting his fate, he saved me from suffering the same.Unwanted Spouse: I admit to being less than eager for my union with my intended bride, and she had become involved with another Vulcan. Her efforts to avoid the marriage could have been quite disastrousif not for the good doctor.Verbal Tic: While I would not refer to it as a "tic", I tend to fit the word "logic" and the permutations thereof into sentences endlessly.Vitriolic Best Buds: Although Doctor McCoy and I frequently engage inbattles of wit and exchange of barbs, we do have a certain... regard for each other. I admit that logic cannot fully explain it.Will Not Tell a Lie: While I can and do lie if the situation calls for it, being a Vulcan, I generally refrain from lying unless it's required of me.The Worf Effect: I have been defeated by some creatures, which were deemed formidable adversaries.You Called Me "X"; It Must Be Serious: If I ever forgo Captain Kirk's title for his nickname, "Jim", it is a sign of extreme circumstances.You Didn't Ask: Like most Vulcans, I am not exactly forthcoming with details about my personal life. In our culture, you do not really tend to broach that subject, unless it is directly relevant to the situation at hand. This has occasionally let to my colleagues getting surprised or even shocked when certain facts about my background are revealed to them. In my defense, I would not have hesitated to tell them, had they actually asked me first.


For best effect, read this in a voice similar toCersei Lannisteror a female Ichabod Crane.So, this is happening. Hold on a moment.*Drinks some poppy tea*Okay, now I am back.Greetings. My name is of no concern to you at his moment in time, but I have the title ofMistress of the Western Fields,Vessel of Truth and Solace,but most people call me Mistress West to save their breath. I was once a witch that ruled the Western Fields, then I became the owner of a brothel in Emerald City afterThe Beast Foreverwastemporarilydefeated, and now I am the right-hand woman toOzma, the queen of Oz herself.Well, it seems like I need to tell you some things about myself, or what you interlopers call "tropes."Berserk Button: I can be a decent person to be around. However, don't ever, and I mean EVER, lie to me. Otherwise, I might have togive you a stretch.Brutal Honesty: Well, my title is The Vessel of Truth and Solace, so I do tell the truth(mostly), but my solace died LONG ago. If you want the truth from me, you will. In spades. And it won't be pretty.Color Motif: Most of my dresses are green. Apparently, green is seen as my colour.Deadpan Snarker: When your life is like mine, you need some sort of defense mechanism to cope. Mine is sarcasm. It helped me through bad times and made the good times I had feel that much better. The only person I know who matches my tongue isQueen Ozma.Driven to Suicide: At that point, I found out that Tip was the daughter of the King and Queen of Oz, so I tried feeding her East's spells. The result was thatTip died. Temporarily, mind you, but I did not know that at that point in time. I truly thought I killed the poor child. I tried to get Glinda to let me see my own mother, but then she refused. Hopeless, I lied down in the Sacred Temple and cut my arms upwards so that I could die and rejoin Tip in the afterlife. Thankfully, she came back in time, so I regained my faith in the world again.Functional Addict: I am not as strong as I used to be now that I am addicted to the poppy, but that does not make me incapable.I successfully completed East's funeral rites under its influence with no issue whatsoever, much to my sister's chagrin.I Banged Your Mom: Anna was a sweet person before mysteriously disappearing. Innocent and naive, yes, but I saw that she had a big heart. I had some sort of mutual respect for her, for her motherworked at my brothel. One of the best workers, she was. I even let her sleep with me. Those were some good times.I told Anna this, but I was high at the time so I ended up sounding like a twat and broke the poor girl's spirit. She was gone the next day. She might have killed herself, all because of me not thinking of what I was saying....shit.I Just Want to Be Loved: It pains me to say it, but I'm not loved where I am from. I am liked by a small amount of people, but I generally feel like I am abandoned at times. My mother took care of me despite motheringover a thousand children,but thenGlinda had to lock her up after The Beast Forever was first stopped for me being chosen as a future progenitor instead of her.I am not kidding you. She is that childish.That left me with my sister East. We were very close as family because she saw my problems and did her best to calm me down when times got rough. Then,she was apparently tricked into killing herselfand it was there that the last person to care for me was gone. That was until Tip came into my life. She was just meant to be a worker at first but then ended upreplacing Mirandaas my right-hand woman. We grew a bond, so that was nice.Hell, she's the Queen of Oz now, which makes me feel better knowing that I was the first oneto know Tip's real name was Ozma and that she was the daughter of the Pastorias.Even though my sister can be a bitch, I wish that one day she will stop treating as inferior because of my lifestyle. I thought the Wizard was a nice person until I found out that heordered the death of Ozma's parents,which is a dick move.In Vino Veritas: To make sure I always tell the truth near certain people, I drink poppy tea. I once told the Wizard that I am happy that he banned magic and that I'm out of practice. I have seen magic go wrong. Horribly wrong. Even with all of the power of me and my kin, I lost most of my kind to The Beast Forever.Ironic Nickname: Well, only about half-right. I do not know why I still have the "solace" part of my title, considering as, once again, I lost it a long time ago. I still do search for and tell the truth(for the most part), so my "Vessel of Truth" part of my title is accurate at least.Mind over Matter: My favourite method of getting information out of people, like I did with that woman who I thought killed my sister.Miss Kitty: I ran a brothel during the Wizard's reign. It may have been run-down, smoky, and the subject of myhypocriticalsister's insults, butit was my new home and I was comfortable in it.Pet the Dog: Yes, I can be both incredibly petty and unbelievably selfish at times, but I care for my kind. I miss East, and I want to hug my mother again if I end up seeing her. I even swore an oath that no more of my kind will die. There is also Tip, for whom I felt we were going to be what you interlopers call "soulmates." One time, I snapped at the child for being snarky herself, but then I felt the need to ask of her feelings were hurt, and I cuddled her hand. I can be a nice person, it's just thatGlinda keeps making me miserable.Shapeshifting: Well, I'm a witch. I can shape-shift, which is a basic ability my kind has. One time, I used this ability to try to convince little Tip to join my side. Luckily for me,it worked, although my disguise waseasily seen through.Maybe I should have used less obvious language about myself.It was a nice bath, though.Another time was when I was interrogating the person who I thought killed my sister.I changed into her mother to get to her head, and I found that she did and didn't kill my sister,which confused me quite a bit.Sherlock Scan: I have identified an acolyte of The Wizard as pregnant when she should have been chaste (Oops!) and then almost instantly recognised the baby's father. All within a single heartbeat.Survivor Guilt: Oh, god. Please don't make me talk about this. *sigh* Fine, then. Twenty years ago,Roquat the Red,The Beast Forever, returned to Oz, and my kind was involved.Being a Cardinal Witch, I was a commander. Glinda and I sent a good amount of witches out, and I gave them milk of the poppy before they fought him.That was the biggest mistake I made in my whole life. Almost every witch we sent out was drowned, and now it constantly feels like it's my fault. Sorry, I need to drink again...


RRRAAAARRRGHHHH!!!!! RRRRRAAAAARRRRHHHHGHHGHHH!!!!!...*pant pant pant*….HI. I ANIMAL. IMUPPET.I PLAY DRUMS!!!!!DRUMS!!!!! GRAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!FIVE THINGS ANIMAL LIKE: WO-MAN!!!!! SLEEP!!!!!! FOOD!!!!!!! DRUMS!!!!!! PAIN!!!!!!!GRRRRAAAAARRRRRRGHHHHHH!!!!!I FROMMUPPET SHOW!!!!! PLAY IN BAND!!!!!!! KEEP ON LEASH!!!!!!!! OUT OF CONTROL!!!!!!!! LOTS OF HITS!!!!!!!! GRAAARRRRGHHHHH!!!!!!!!! ANIMAL REMEMBER ONE TIME!!!!!!!FROG GUYGET ME TO CHASEKILT GUYOFF STAGE!!!!!!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!THEN SHOW END!!!!!!! RAAAARRRGHHH!!!!!SESAME GUYS KEEP GOING!BUT NOT MUPPETS!!!!!!!! NOT ANIMAL!!!!!!!! AAAAAAGYAGYAGYAGYAGYAGYAGYAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!*pant pant pant*…BUT THEN MUPPETS HAVEMOVIE. AND ANIMAL IN IT!!!!!!!!!I GROW BIG!!!!!!! CHASE AWAY BAD GUY!!!!!!!! SAVE FROG GUY!!!!!!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! THEN MUPPETS MAKE MORE MOVIES!!!!!! ANIMAL IN THEM TOO!!!!!!!!! AND BABY ANIMAL APPEAR INBABY MUPPET CARTOON!!!!!!!!! ANIMAL DANCE!THENMUPPET SPACE MOVIE COME OUT!!!!!!! IT JUNK!!!!!!! BECAUSE ANIMAL NOT STAR!!!!!! GRRRAAAAAARRRRGHHHHHH!!! SOSEGEL GUYMAKENEW MUPPET MOVIE!!!!!! I TAKE ANGER MANAGEMENT. IN CONTROL…*pant* IN CONTROL… *pant*BUT THEN DRUMS!!!!DRUMS!!!!!!!MAKE ANIMAL MAD!!!!!MAD!!!!!ANIMAL PLAY FOR FROG GUY’S SONG!!!!!! AND EVERYONE LOVE!!!!!!!GRAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! THEN THEYMAKE SEQUEL!!!!!!!BAD FROGIN IT!!!!!!! FOOL OTHER MUPPETS!!!!!!!! BUT NOT ANIMAL!!!!!!!ANIMAL SMART!!!!!!AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…*pant*… *pant*…ANIMAL INCOMPUTER VIDEOSTOO!!!!!SING WITH BEAKER AND CHEF GUY!!!!!! NO ONE UNDERSTAND!!!!!!! BUT EVERYONE LOVE!!!!!!! THEN WE DOQUEEN SONG!!!!!!! I PLAY DRUMS AGAIN!!!!! I SING FOR MAMA!!!!!... ANIMAL MISS MAMA.BUT WE WON THE WEBBY!!!!! WE WON THE WEBBY!!!!! ANIMAL TELL MAMA!!!!!!GRAAAAAAARRRRGHHHHHH!!!!(AND ANIMAL PLAY DRUMS FORWEEZERTOO!!!)ANIMAL MAKE TROPE PAGE!!!!!!! BECAUSE EVERYONE LOVE ANIMAL!!!!!! EVERYONE READ ABOUT ANIMAL!!!!!! BECAUSE ANIMAL ROCK!!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!FRANK OZANIMAL’S BEST HELPER!!!!! SAME GUY AS PIG WOMAN AND BEAR GUY AND EAGLE GUY ANDCOOKIE GUYAND GREENStar WarsGUY AND...*pant pant pant*…ANIMAL FORGET. BUT HE RETIRE. NOW ERIC JACOBSON ANIMAL’S HELPER!!!!!TROPES!!!!! TROPES!!!!! GRAAAAARRRRGHHHH!!!!!!All Drummers Are Animals:ANIMALNAME TROPE!!! THAT MAKE IT BEST TROPE!!!!! RAAAAAAARRRGHHHHHH!!!!!Breakout Character:ANIMAL EVERYONE’S FAVORITE IN BAND!!!!!! LOTS OF ANIMAL THINGS TO BUY!!!!!!! MORE THAN FROG GUY!!!!!! I BECOME OLYMPIC SKI MASCOT TOO!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!Cartoon Creature:WHAT ANIMAL IS ANIMAL? ME DON'T KNOW!ME DON'T CARE! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!The Cast Showoff:ANIMAL DRUM BATTLE! BUDDY RICH! TRAVIS BARKER! DAVE GROHL! ANIMAL WIN BATTLE!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!Dark Is Not Evil:ANIMAL WILD ONE!!!!!!! BUT NOT BAD ONE!!!!!!! ANIMAL LIKE MUPPETS!!!!!!! THEY GOOD!!!!!! THEY NICE TO ANIMAL!!!!!!!Evil Detecting Animal:FROG GUY GONE!!! BAD FROG TRY TAKE HIS PLACE!!!FOOL OTHER MUPPETS!!!! BUT ANIMAL KNOW BETTER!!!! GRAAAAAARGHHHH!!!!!Extreme Omnivore:EAT DRUMS!!! EAT DRUMS!!!Fiery Redhead:ME RED!!!!!!!!! ME ANGRY!!!!! ME BETTER THANRED TICKLE GUY!!!!!! GRAAAAARRRRGHHHHH!!!!!Hulk Speak:ANIMAL TALK GOOD!!!!!!!! JUST LIKEBIG GREEN MARVEL GUY!!! WE BOTH BIG AND ANGRY ANDDISNEY!!!! HANG OUT SOMETIME!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!Large Ham:LOTS OF MUPPETS ARE HAM! ESPECIALLYPIG WOMAN!!!! BUT ANIMAL IS BIGGEST ONE!!!!! ME SHOUT A LOT!!!!! THAT MAKE ME HAM!!!!!....HAM TASTE GOOD!!!!! BUT NOT PIG WOMAN!!!!! (EXCEPT IF YOUCHEF GUY.)Signature Laugh:ANIMAL LAUGH LIKE THIS: AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!Still Got It:ANIMAL STOP DRUMMING!!!DRUMS MAKE ANIMAL MAD!!! BUT ANIMAL DRUM FOR FROG GUY'S SONG!!! AND ANIMAL STILL DRUM GOOD!!! PINK GUITAR GUY SAY SO!!!!Sgt. Floyd Pepper:You still got it!Wicked Cultured:RENOIR! RENOIR!!!Statler: This page is getting on my nerves. The shouting, the loud rock music, the bad grammar...Waldorf: So it's pretty much the Internet in a nutshell!Both:Do-ho-ho-ho—Animal:GO AWAY!!!GO AWAY!!!!


Me love COOOKIES!(For full effect, read in the deep, gravelly voice ofFrank OzorDavid Rudman)Hello there! Me Cookie Monster. Me live onSesame Street. Me furry blue monster (see picture) that love cookies. Actually, me love all foods. But especially cookies!And for those wondering, no, me no change name to "Veggie Monster". Me still eat cookies. Me eat veggies too, of course, but me still love cookies. Speaking of which, me have large box of cookies with me right now. Just a sec...OM NOM NOM NOM NOM!(crushes cookies in his mouth and projects crumbs everywhere)Me have many tropes that apply to me:Anti-Role Model: Me probably not the best guy to look up to.Ascended Meme: MeCatchphrase, "OM NOM NOM NOM NOM", is now meme. Me wondering why me no receive royalties for it.Baby's First Words: Me first word was cookie.Big Eater: Me can and will eat just about anything.Big Word Shout: Occasionally, me shout "Cowabunga." Me also known to shout name of things me planning to eat.Bizarre Taste in Food: As me explain to Ernie, me sometime soft-boil, scramble, juice, or fry me cookies.Catchphrase: Me often say "COOOOOOOOKIE!" and "OM NOM NOM NOM NOM!" Other times, me say "COWABUNGA!"Crazy Consumption: Me eat loudly and crush cookies in me mouth while letting crumbs everywhere.Early Personality Signs: When me first try cookie, me immediately gobbled down nineteen more, me first word was "cookie", and me gave meself own nickname.Extreme Omnivore: Me not picky, me eat anything. Styrofoam, wood, pick-up truck, pencil, typewriter, telephone, VW Beetle, even moon... but me still prefer cookies!Foregone Conclusion: If me in sketch, chances are me going to eat something by end of it, especially if it cookie.Hidden Depths: Me might seem like simple-minded glutton, but me can be very clever when me want to be. Me also a big fan of high culture (remember me role as Alistair Cookie in "Monsterpiece Theater" sketches?) and very good artist (if me can resist eating me own paintings).Hulk Speak: Me speak like thatbig green guy. It just the way me talk.Jabba Table Manners: Me sorry not to be polite when eating... but me just so happy when eating cookies!Large Ham: And now me hungry for ham.Obsessed with Food: Me cannot live without thinking about cookies...Only Known by Their Nickname: Fun fact - me real name actually "Sidney". "Cookie Monster" just nickname that stuck.Out-of-Character Moment:During song called "Take a Rest", metook nap from eating cookies, even though normally eating never make me tired.In other song, "Me Wait", me tried to teach viewers self control by waiting for cookies, even though me had no reason to.After me had nightmare about flying cookies that no let me eat them, me became afraid of cookies... for about three seconds.Shared Family Quirks:Me mommy like cookies nearly as much as me do, and she messy eater as well.Me baby cousin, named Cousin Monster, also known as Baby Monster, also has big appetite like me. However, she pickier eater than me and no eat cookies.Sweet Tooth: Me love all kinds of desserts, but especially cookies!Trademark Favorite Food: It is pretty obvious what me love to eat.Vague Age: What age Cookie Monster? Me no sure.You No Take Candle: Me well-known speech pattern is me bad grammar.There, me done-wait, more cookies for me?!? COOOOOOOKIIIIIIIIIES!!!! OM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM!


ONE! That's ONE picture of me on this page! Ah ah ah!(for full effect, read in the voice ofJerry NelsonorMatt Vogel)Greetings! You have found the TV Tropes page of the Count,Sesame Street's resident vampire! (Don't vorry, though; I'm what the late Sir Terry Pratchett calleda Black Ribboner. I live in a castle with many, many bats! I think I'll count them all!ELEVEN! That's ELEVEN tropes that apply to me! Ah ah ah!Badass Cape: Iama vampire, after all!The Charmer: I am quite the romantic, if I do say so myself.Dark Is Not Evil: No, I do not vant to suck your blood. I am notTHATtype of vampire.Dramatic Thunder: Every single time I finish counting.Friendly Neighborhood Vampire: Again, I am notTHATtype of vampire.Good with Numbers: FIFTEEN! That's FIFTEEN letters in the name of that trope! Ah ah ah!Impoverished Patrician: "In old Transylwania, vhen I vas a lad/Our castle vas poor, but ve vere never sad..."Plot Allergy: I happen to be allergic to flowers, but I do not mind - when I count flowers, I sneeze, and then I can count my sneezes!The Pollyanna: As long as there are things to count, nothing ever dampens my spirits.Vampire Vords: That is how I, the Count, speak.Vampires Hate Garlic: Once, when I went shopping at Sarita's Supermarket, a vendor offered me garlic. I told him, "Pass."Now that'sONEabout me completed! Ah ah ah ah ah ah! (cue thunder)


Elmo is very happy to see you!(For full effect, read in the falsetto voice ofKevin Clash, Ryan Dillon,orEduardo Garza.)Hello! Welcome to Elmo's page! Guess what Elmo is thinking about today?That's right, Elmo is thinking about TV Tropes!Elmo lives onSesame Streetwith his mommy and daddy and goldfish, Dorothy. Elmo's friends include Big Bird, Cookie Monster, Grover, Zoe, Abby Cadabby, Bert, Ernie, Telly, and Baby Bear. Elmo has a lot of friends, really!Tropes that apply to Elmo:All-Loving Hero: Elmo loves everyone!Cheerful Child: Elmo's very cheerful!Cuddle Bug: Elmo loves hugs!Friend to All Living Things: Elmo's friends with pretty much everyone on Sesame Street.Mr. Imagination: Elmo likes using his imagination a lot.Never Learned to Read: Elmo's only three years old, what do you expect?Nice Guy: Elmo doesn't want to brag, but Elmo is one of the nicest residents of Sesame Street.Red Is Heroic: Elmo became a main character of Sesame Street since the mid 1980's and Elmo's fur is red.Signature Laugh:Elmo loves to laugh as well.Third-Person Person: Elmo speaks in the third person. It's just the way Elmo talks.THAT'S ELMO'S PAAAAAAGE!


Well since I got nothing better to do, I may as well keep you all entertained with this informative Self Demonstrating character page.Alright, let's get this over with. I am, if you haven't guessed already, Oscar the Grouch, and I live in my trash-can onSesame Street, intent on just being miserable, grouchy and mean as I can be, as well as passing it on to everybody else.Tropes that apply to yours truly, Oscar the Grouch:Big Eater: My appetite is almost enough to give Cookie Monster a run for his money.Deadpan Snarker: When you have to deal with the people I put up with on a daily basis, you'd develop a sharp sense of humor too.Enemy Mine: I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'vehad to help Elmo out once. I may have an unpleasant disposition, but even I share his mutual dislike of Huxley.Green Is Gross: My fur is green and I love anything gross. Did you know my fur used to be orange? It probably would be again if I took a bath once in a while. Yuck!Hates Baths: The only bath I like to take is a mud bath.Large Ham: Who's to say I can't be both snarky and hammy?Grouch With a Heart Of Gold: I took Maria to the hospital when she had to give birth. I was confused by this since Grouches are not supposed to do nice things!Odd Friendship: Yeah it's true. Gonzo's rat buddy Rizzoonce offered me to make room in my trashcan for him.Only One Finds It Fun: When Elmo wished for it to be Christmas every day, he turned Sesame Street into a Grouch's paradise. Everyone was miserable due to having to celebrate Christmas every day, Maria and Luis were out of practice and their Fix-it Shop went under, Big Bird was upset because Snuffy was celebrating Christmas in Cincinnati with his grandmother, the carolers lost their voices from singing carols every day, and even The Count was sick of counting Christmases! I also got tons of trash in the form of wrapping paper and used Christmas trees. It's a shame that little red menace went and put things right for everyone else. I would have preferred if he got new roller skates like he originally wanted.Trademark Favorite Food: I find foods with mold on it to be quite delicious.Okay, you've stuck around to the end and that's great, but now I just have one thing to say: SCRAM!


"HHhhmmm! It's time to make my move."(For full effect, read in the weaselly voice of Barry Dennen orSimon Pegg)HHhhhmmmmm!Greetings, friends! It is good to see you! Please, let me introduce myself, please! Am skekSil, the Skeksis Chamberlain, second in line to throne behind Emperor skekSo. Throne is my right. skekSil best fit to rule, skekSil the smartest and wisest, shall be Emperor one day! Ruler of Thra, first Lord ofthe Dark Crystal, yes!For a long time, Skeksis ruled Gelflings fairly, Geflings served us, skekSil made sure they stayed divided. UntilSkeksis discovered Gelfling essence the Crystal drained for us. skekSil first had the idea to use it! HHhhhmmmmm! Harvesting Gelfling essence, yes, Skeksis needed it to survive. But Gelflings stubborn, Gelflings did not listen and rebelled. Garthim crushed them! Then, no more essence…skekSil tried taking the throne after skekSo died... My rightful seat! HHhhhmmmmm! Challenged skekUng the Garthim Master to Trial by Stone, yes. But skekSil made a mistake... Garthim Master was too strong, and cast skekSil out. But skekSil knew what to do, yes. Finding the last Gelflings before Garthim do, and skekSil shall be Chamberlain again! HHhhhmmmmm!Tropes applying to skekSil, yes! HHhhhmmmmm!Berserk Button:Out of my spot!!skekSil isrightfuladvisor to the Emperor! No one else! Will suffer notanySkeksis who try to take this from Chamberlain! skekVar learned this the hard way...hhhhmmmmm!Catchphrase Insult: Spithead!Chronic Backstabbing Disorder: No other Skeksis shall stand in my way to the throne! HHhhhmmmmm!Death of Personality: skekSil and urSol were once the urSkek known as Silsol! If Silsol returns... then, no more skekSil. skekSil will not let this happen!Dying Race: Hundreds of trines ago, Skeksis were eighteen, hhhhhmmmmm! Then only eight left when third Great Conjunction happens.Faux Affably Evil: skekSil is your friend!Skeksis mean no harm!Good Counterpart: It is unfortunate, but skekSil cannot live without thatSpitheadurSol The Chanter.Obfuscating Stupidity: skekSil smart, yes! But other Skeksis shall not know until my hour comes!The Right of a Superior Species: Gelflings are to Skeksis what crawlies are to Gelflings!The Rival:General skekVar took my place at the Emperor's side. Lacked brains, yes, skekSil got rid of him easily! skekVar should not have trusted skekSil, hhhhhmmmmm!skekUng the Garthim Master is like skekVar, but harder to speak to... skekUng does not trust skekSil. skekSil has no choice... Trial by Stone!Smug Snake: What? No! skekSkil the smartest Skeksis, skekSil shall be Emperor! HHhhhmmmmm!The Starscream: skekSil has served the Emperor for hundreds of trine, skekSil shall rule now!Succession Crisis: skekSil chose Trial by Stone after Emperor skekSo died. Bad mistake, yes!Third-Person Person: skekSil likes to speak with third person, yes! But I occasionally use "I", see.Verbal Tic:HHhhhmmmmm!You No Take Candle: skekSil can speak Gelfling language, yes, but not very well.I go now. Bye-bye!


♫Yörn, desh born, der rïtt, de gïtt der gûe,♫♫Örn desh dée born desh de umn børk børk børk!♫(tosses utensils over shoulders)Høøskee døølee! Jie ist der flürdy gürdy Svedéesh Chëff. Jie ist frümSvedée! Vürsh de börsh de møøshDer Møøppet Shøø, und der hürsh der Cüukkeeng-Shøø. Awêenda shmüre der yøøm-yøøm-yøøm, de vürsh de måni tästi, bøøt must oöff ell der chîckée. Jie méke-a der Chîckée in der Bäskée, der Sprëeng Chîckée, und der get fröom der chîckée der egg-u-sh. Bøøt der nefer vürk! Der nefer vürk!Und nübudy léekes-a de cüukkeeng! Børk børk børk!Und orsh der séengéen! Der møøséec! Yinga dinga shmüre der séeng “Der Häsh Nü Bununu de Shmüre” (mebée-a ebuøøt der Bunununu-nununununu Shpleet?), und séeng“Däni Boi-oi”vit der Béekür undUnëemel. Um gesh dee børk, børk!Awéenda shmüre de Møøppet müufées. Ja, ja. Vürsh de cørnDer Møøppet Müufée-a, der féêlm vent flëëp-flëëp-flëëp-flëëp-flëëp! Mörshtie börshtie oozzer Møøppet müufées, de nøøest esDer MøøppetsundMøøppets Müst Vünted.Möøsh börsh de hür deYøøbéé-Tøøbéé! Véér decårven der pumpkin, und är dîî måkkïn dêpöpcørnvit de putte dee shrîmpéé. Børk børk børk!Zee Svedeesh Cheff shoos ixemples ooff zee fullooeeng trupes:Ecteeng fur Tvu:Invürtéé. Yøng desh hür de tvu hélpürs, de oone-a für de hedd, de oone-a für de hünds. Hürty flürty schnîpp schnîpp.Uneemels Hete-a Heem: Vhy dün't-a der chîckées und shrîmpéés und hottee-der-døøgéés vunt to be cüukened? Um gesh dee børk, børk!Es Lung Es It Suoonds Fureeegn: Jie spëëken der Muck Svedéesh!Jie acshuellî spëëken der Muck Jepunéese-a. Koyo, nido namihido!Beeg-a Ulde Aybrooz: Booshy booshy brooz!Kitch Freeeez: Oor meebee aVurble Teek: Børk børk børk!Ëëveen der Søøbtïtloor Ees Støømped: Jie mäken der veedeö fur mäken derPöpcørn Shrîmpëës, und jie häven der søøbtïles fur Svedéesh - Chëff! Bööt der søøbtîtler nü ünderstânden mëë!Fureeegn Qooeeseene-a:Süuse-a EeeeeeSPN ünkerss sey de speeshul der blürchy lürchy yürchymit der explénée by derfellüu Svede-a Henrik Lundqvist! Um gesh dee børk, børk!Eronéé: En de Svéédéésh dübbing, Eü am de onlü chérécter whodøéesn'tspéék Svedéesh!Lethel Cheff:Ar dîî måkkïn dê pyüüüüüüüüüüü-téééééééééééééén, de tästin dê pyüüüüüüüüüüü-téééééééééééééén, mørsh de vürsh de hårtettëcken!


For maximum immersion, turn the volume up and the lights down, put onthe soundtrack, and stand up if possible.Welcome back, kids! Welcome to my page. Call me two faced - call me anytime - call me Baron Samedi! Scope this! Check it out, children: talent, raw talent! And baby, believe me, rock and roll is good for the soul, except - I AIN'T GOT ONE! Now how's that for an opener from a good looking corpse!Now here's the scoop, kids. Whenever old Uncle Baron says, "Thrill Me", you'll stand straight up... Oh? You're the only one here, and you want to explain who I am and some tropes? You're in the wrong place at the wrong time... but I'm feeling generous.I'm a zombie, as if you couldn't tell. You see all the imitationsover there? Hahahaha... Uncle Baron here is the only real deal.Listen up. I used to be A VJ. I'd play music for peeps and had them join my frightclub, The Cathedral Of Jive. My slogan was "Everybody’s welcome! it doesn’t matter if you are a somebody or a nobody. Just as long as you’re a body!" It was a scream, one to be had, for sure.Now that I'm stuck in the Other Side, I had the chance to challenge that Gatekeeper inthat game, but then I got my own! It's fast, it's frightening, it's a freakin' party! I also got to play with a Witch, aVampire, and a Mummy (even if it got delayed)! But you can't deny that my game is the best, eh, kiddo? Still, l've been feeling a little lonely lately... Wanna join? Of course you do!Trope time! Big time! Party time! And then some!Affably Evil: I may be a zombie, but as in life, surely I should be a kind host to all babes who play with me... Well, with the exception of Dirtbag.Body Horror: Hey, ugly: top this! *Baron removes his hat to reveal his brains* Do you like it? Man, those earthworms don't do anything for a guy's complexion!Catchphrase: Yo? Whose go? Thrill me! And you better answer "Yo Baron, I can dig it", or you're gonnahit the hole!Color-Coded Characters: Green suits me real well, doesn't it? But it used to be white... Whatever.Counting to Three: Hey Dirtbag, if you ain't out of the room, and out of my sight by the count of five, you're gonna miss that many turns! One! Two! Three, four, five!The GM Is a Cheating Bastard: If you got me from the bag, then I may as well give you some cards and extra turns while we're at it! Hey, if you can't help yourself... who can you help?Hypocritical Humor: As long as I'm here, keep standing... I hate bad manners. *snort* *spit*Malicious Misnaming: Got used to that name yet, Dirtbag? Thrill me!Time's up, losers! Winners are grinners, and I'm flashing the ivory! And taking a bow. I hope you have a nice night's sleep, children, and don't forget to check under the bed!


Hello TV Tropes!(For theotherSentinels of the Multiverseshmuks, thecharacters pageforSOTMheroes is right over...here.Side NoteFor the maximum Guise experience, read this page in the voice ofJoe Zieja!)Hey everyone. Guise here. And I am the best hero in literally all of everything. Sure, I used to be a simple tabloid reporter (lies, all lies!) until I made my debut in my own mini-expansion (courtesy of the good people at Greater Than Games) but I knew that I, Guise, was destined to be the best hero ever!If you're wondering the best way to play my cards, look no further. All you've gotta do is chain them together to beat the bad guys and save the day all by yourself. You can even use the powers and cards of other heroes and do it way better than them too. And don't forget to play the Best Card Ever.I've got two alternate forms, too!Santa Guisebrings the joy of Gift-Mas to the battlefield, whileCompletionist Guiseowns every single promo of every single hero!Now lemme think, tropes that apply to me...Achilles' Heel: Psst. Don't tell the bad guys, but my deck kinda falls apart if I can't get a good card churn or something stops me from playing; all my Ongoings explode after a turn, and they're most of what keeps me operating, so I need to keep replacing them when they get taken out!Air Guitar: I don't actually do this, but my player can do this on Let Me See That... Cool effect too.Anti-Hero: Okay, look, I keep saving the day, got it? Sure, I'm not a saint, but who is? (Stupid Legacy and his boy scout antics...)Armor Piercing: When I'm X-Treeeeeme any damage I do is Irreducible, and can't be redirected as a fringe benefit!Attack Deflector: Inverted! My X-Treeeeme card prevents my damage from being redirected! Also grants my attacksArmor Piercing!As for playing it straight, when I'm a Total Beefcake I can redirect damage to the villains!Attention Whore:Whoa!How'd this get here?Rude.Back from the Dead: Okay, so the official story on paper is that I got crushed by some debris when Wager Master said hi, and the residual implausibility from said debris transferred into me.Also, I kind of sort of turned into a puddle of sludge during Oblivaeon but then the Scholar, My hero, saved me and now I’m back and better than ever.Badass Santa: When the other holidays declare war on Christmas, it's up tometo save the day! As usual.Berserk Button: Wager Master really ticked me off by putting his drink on my table without a coaster!He makes stuff float! He had half a dozen things floating next to him right then!It's the Best Whatever, Ever!: My Best Card Ever which is just the coolest.Breaking the Fourth Wall: I love doing that. Heck, I'm doing it right now! Look, I'm still doing it! (Christopher and Adamsay that I'm just delusional andthinkI'm in a comic book, but who listens to those guys anyway?)Character Development: I was awesome before, but I got even better after hanging with the Scholar for a while!Combos: Basically the entire point of my deck, especially with my standard variant (which can play extra cards with its power), is to come up with absurd antics involving nailing my stuff together in destructive ways and possibly borrowing stuff from everyone else: Guise the Barbarian with Blatant Reference for heavy damage, for example, or sweeping the field by grabbing Mr Fixer's Jack Handle or Dual Crowbars and then chaining Best Card Ever into Hey, Look What I Found, or spamming cards by copying Requital Captain Cosmic's power, or cloning Legacy's field to double up on buffs and make Heroic Interception team-wide...Chest Insignia: Which can change to suit my mood and shape. Which is good because, as you might have noticed,No Mouthover here.Composite Character: A few gents named Deadpool (wearing tights, talking to you fine folks),The Mask(changing up my wardrobe with the occasional trip intoHammerspace, andPlastic Man(yeah, I stretch, and maybe didn't lead the noblest life, although it's not like I was a criminal) may immediately spring to mind, but apparently I'm actually an homage tosome guy named Ambush Bug. He liked TV too, I guess. Never heard of him? Didn't think so. This mask looks better in my colors anyway.Ditto Fighter: In my own unique and incredibly good-smelling way: I've got my own unique abilities (all of them awesome), but my cards like "I Can Do That Too!", "Let Me See That...", "Uh, Yeah, I'm That Guy!" let me (respectively) imitate my teammates powers, steal their equipment, or copy all their ongoings for a round! (And in case you're wondering, copying teamwide buffs like Legacy's "Galvanize" and Ra's "Imbued Fire" allows them tostack.No need to thank me.)The Friend Nobody Likes: Pssh, what's this doing here? Don't listen tothat Christopher guy! Everybodyloveshaving me around!Meaningful Name: "Guise," as in "disguise" or "mask". Get it? And my pre-Guise name wasJoe King. Betsomeonethought that was really funny...Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot: Some may accuse me of selling out, but can you blame me? I gotta have all the best swag! You should check out my awesome Ninja Pirate Zombie Fanboy IN SPACE getup! It's pretty awesome! Complete withthis awesome shirtandthis AMAZING plushie!No Mouth: I mean, you can sort of see the shape of it through my mask.Power Copying: My best trick is to borrow cards in play and sometimes the powers of my lackeys I mean fellow heroes for a turn!Purple Is Powerful: Yes, yes it is.Rogues Gallery: My Nemeses are Wager Master, a blue space gnome with a gambling addiction, Argentium, some silent metal blob man thing, Cueball, who hangs out on the World's Largest Pool Table and has a head shaped like guess what, and the Green Grosser, a green-skinned nut who rigs fruit to explode, declared war on Christmas, and forced me to live Banana-Less. Why do I get all the weirdos, anyway?Self-Proclaimed Love Interest: Self-Proclaimed? What are you talking about! Me and Cary totally have a Batman-Catwoman thing going on!Shout-Out: One of my hobbies:Guise the Barbarian!Crush your enemies, drive them before you, andLAMINATE THEIR WOMEN!Mr. Fixer wants me to stop asking if he wants me towax on, wax off. I still ask him anyway.I also like to make the occasional blatant reference toSamuel L Coolguy.SAY WHAT AGAIN!And then this one time I turned itoGene Simmonsand playedFreebirdon the Argent Adept's Lyra! (Which is actually a lute. I still don't know why he INSISTS on calling it that...)Oh, and don't forget that time I was aSuper Ultra KawaiiMagical Love Prince!Spotlight-Stealing Squad: A combination of my cards lets me use my teammates cards as if I was them so I get to save the day instead of them!Voluntary Shapeshifting: Only the best superpower for the best superhero. Although I don't seem to be able to change my face or the colors of my, ah, tights? I have anUnlimited Wardrobeof props and wigs and costumes I can pull out ofHammerspaceanytime I like.Xtreme Kool Letterz: You know, for overly-muscular gun-toting X-Treeeeeme!!!!'90s Anti-Herothrowbacks? But of course!


My name is Alan Wake, I'm a writer.The visitor clicked the link and suddenly Darkness invaded their thoughts. There was someone there.The visitor knew it. They read it. Dictations and syllables imprinted into the code of the site as though it was always there. A self-demonstrating article of a man who did not exist, or so that it was they have learned after playing his game.His wife was alive and the Darkness has retreated into the unknown, but he and it knew this was only a set-back.He continues to reach out to the world hoping to be free. BeyondBright Falls. Beyondthe Oldest House. Into the wild-blue yonder of Cyberspace. He hoped the light of mankind's knowledge would free him of the Darkness that surrounded him, but he could only find more unanswered questions and falsehoods, and so he writes. He writes who he is. He hoped that someone would find it and free him of this Dark Place and that swallowed him like Jonah and the Whale. Either freed to bask in the light of the sun, or through the cold embrace of oblivion.The troper clicks "Edit Page". They get to work.Action Survivor:No one is safe when the bodies drop. That is what makesHorrorso effective to readers and viewers. Tension builds and releases, the danger and adrenaline shared between the veil of fiction and reality. To hold a gun you never fired before out of necessity can paralyze you. To see the sun rise for another day can make anyone willing to kill.The Alcoholic: Alan thought back to the days before he came to Bright Falls. He remembered the celebrations and the hard times. He forgot the taste of his morning coffee but he could remember every sip of the bourbon Barry poured for him in celebrating his best-seller. While he missed the bitter taste, he did not miss the looks Alice would give him when he woke up the next day.Author Avatar: A writer is nothing but the main protagonist of his ownThrillernovel. ThePlayer Characterof someone else's game.One can never surmise if he is being played or stands in the way of the player.He can only live his life and only ask if distinctions even matter. If the act of knowing made a difference.Broke Your Arm Punching Out Cthulhu: While a part of Alan felt lighter with the knowledge of Barbara Jagger's destruction, he knew that the Darkness was still there. A lurking predator biding its time until its prey became lost and alone.Trapped in a cabin beneath Cauldron Lake with himself and his thoughts. At war with himself like a mouse under the cat's mercy.Classical Antihero: Alan Wake is arrogant, prideful, and resentful of his own success.Evil Counterpart: Mr. Scratch is Alan's nemesis and possesses all of his memories as well as appearance. He is the sum of all the dark rumors and innuendo about Alan in the real world.Private Eye Monologue: Alan knew that he could never do the profession justice, but he always believed that a part of himself brought Alex Casey to life. The heart and mind beneath the cigarette smoke and the gunfire and the tragedy.Reality Warper: Alan gained this ability at the lakeoceanbut the price was that whatever he tried to create would be influenced by the Dark Presence. It was a constant tug of war between what Alan wanted to happen and what the Dark Presence could corrupt it to be.Sanity Slippage: Alan sat alone as he typed. Mindlessly typing, always typing. Typing his thoughts as they played in a loop. His thoughts ran from him as his mind would forget them just as quick. Mindlessly typing, always typing. The line between what was real and what he made to be real was erased and now all he had was typing, always typing. Alan sat alone as he typed. Stories of escape leaped from his mind and behaved like they were true, but they were nothing but dreams and all there was to wake-up to was the Dark Place. Alan sat alone as he typed. Orange Peel.