Maybe potentially recycle some things from this as well: https://web.archive.org/web/20150910164314/https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/SelfDemonstrating/DrEggmanAs you can see, this is my domain! Get a load ofthis!"Citizens of Earth, lend me your ears and listen to me very carefully! My name is Dr. Eggman, the world's greatest scientist, and soon to be the world's greatest ruler! Now witness the beginning of the greatest empire of all time! Hahahaha!"—Meannouncing myself to the people of the world, just before I blew up half their precious moon as a mere demonstration of my power(To any future peons speaking English, read this page in the voice ofLong John Baldry,Jim Cummings, Edwin Neal,Garry Chalk, Deem Bristow,Alfred Coleman,Mike Pollock,Brian DrummondorJim Carrey. For the similarly ripe-to-be-conquered Japan,Masaharu Sato,Junpei Takiguchi,Chikao Ohtsukaor Kotaro Nakamura should suffice. For France and all its aspiring Eggman real estate, go with Marc Bretonnière. But to quotea certain lunatic with a horrible fashion sense, the ideal option is that you read it inmyvoice… OR ELSE!noteThough I'm witha certain colleagueonhow it should at least be someone worthy enough to be me.Oh, and make sure to listen tosomeofthesehittunesas you read about yours truly!This oneespecially! Also,all spoilers are unmarked.Don't like that? Too bad!)(Also, if you hear either Orbot or Cubot, just read their stuff in the voices ofKirk ThorntonandWally Wingertor whatever. OrDeven Mackforbothif that's your thing.)Alarm:INTRUDERALERT! INTRUDERALERT!WHAT!? WHODARESATTEMPT TO HACK MY SYSTEMS!? ONLY A FOOL WOULD BE BRAZEN ENOUGH TO TRY TO TAKE OVER MY—! …Eh? Wait a minute. You're just a regular human? Well, this is rare. More often than not, it's an annoying two-tailed fox trying to hack into my systems, followed by an evenmoreannoyingspeedy hedgehogcoming in to infiltrate. Now, just who are you, and what is your business here?You… wish toeducate yourselfon my brilliance? Heh! Ha! HAHAHAHA!OHOHOHOHO!Well, you didn't need to bother with the sneaky approach forthat, surely! Given the sorts of inferiors I'm told you may have come across on your way here (my oldfire-breathing princess-kidnapping cohortnotwithstandingnoteBowser:Gwa ha ha ha ha! See that?! The doc's smart enough to know what theAWESOMEkind of evil is all about!), such as……ahem…Thatsecond-rate saurian schemeror hisidiotic accident-prone insectoid underlingnoteMegatron:Boldly put for one who's continuously failed to eliminate a single, pestering organic hedgehog, let alone conquer their homeworld. I suggest you remember whoactuallytook control of their planet and ruled over it with an iron fist before you go suggesting who's "second rate". Yeeeeees.Me:My, my, my. You'veforgotten, haven't you.Megatron:Even that was temporary because you didn't take into account the other organic hedgehog from an alternate timeline.Thatgrubby so-called mageThatequally grubby procyonid pestThatmouthy and diminutive purple dragonThathack excuse for a scientist and his talking meat shieldThatventilated sad-sack with a glowing sticknoteVader:Impressive. You believe childish insults could belittle me. You are no Kenobi—merely a dead man, should our paths cross in the future.Thatfat little mongrelnoteCartman:Ay!Me:Yeah, you heard me!Thatgun-toting oaf of a mercenary who participated in our racesnoteHeavy:Heavy is no oaf! This is PhD in Russian Literature from Soviet College of Mines, Farms, and Sciences. It comes up in my line of work more than you think. Also, Heavy wish to congratulate Eggman on helping to finally have good video game movie, despite petty insult. Next time there is race, Heavy will be there!Me:Yes, erm, thank you.Thatspace mercenary who brings idiotic destruction everywherenoteLobo:Dunno why an egghead like you wastes lots of moolah buildin' weapons or tryin' to rouse some cranky monster from its nap when you can just hire da Main Man ta deal with yer rodent problem!Me:I see. We'll call you.Thatemotionally conflicted AIThatpugilistic martial artist galavanting around a post-nuclear wastelandThatso-called teen genius with the potty mouthand thatpallid child that bedevils hernoteMe: Stay away from those two, Sage.Miu: Oh what's the matter, Humpty Hump? Afraid she'll catch cooties?Thatair-headed princess whose "magic wand" defies all logic and sciencenoteSeriously, her kingdom is a worse combination of archaism and anachronism than the Acorn monarchyThosetwo dim-witted teenage delinquents that make my own bumbling sidekicks across time and space look slightly intelligentStarscream, becausethat's an insult in itselfnoteStarscream:AN INSULT?! You're not the one witha Tropenamed after him, you oversized fleshling! When we have our inevitable crossover, I WILL SQUASH YOU LIKE A BUG! And if I recall, your "prized creation" pulled a me on you.Me:Yes. Once. And he was better at it than you were.Deadpool, because whathasn'tbeen saidabout himThatsad, hooded kook who can't keep his inner circle in check, let alone take over the worldThatbizarre composite creature that defy all laws of nature regarding its existenceThatfairy-obsessed schoolteacher who serves as a cautionary tale to not let my desire to defeat the hedgehog subvert my intellectualismnoteSpeaking from experience here; all that spazzing out at the mention of fairies is not good for your bodyThatso-called "Devil Hunter" who would nevertheless make adequate Zeti baitThatso-called "Autonomic Nerve" who somehow reminds me of SagenoteFor the love ofmeand all things good about me, don't pick up any of her annoying habits, SageThatother far less iconic genius doctornoteDoctor Doom:I will ignore that petulant insult for now. But know that when your failings catch up to you, Doom will not come to your aid.Thatwet blanket of an "evil scientist" who constantly coordinates his own downfall alongside platypus interferencenoteHopefully Sage doesn't imitate his daughter's goth fashionThatnosy little girl with psychic powersnoteWere it not for her heroic delusions, Sage could make a useful tool— err,friendout of herThatpoor ignorant everyman who can't catch a woodland creature to save his lifeThatlab accident whose sentences end in redundaciesThoseinterdimensional aliens who are even worse in speaking with redundaciesThatwebbed, wall-crawling menace, because why mess with an already appropriate descriptionnotePerhaps I should have a meeting with that "Norman Osborn" fellow of hisThewall-crawler's biggest critic, who looks like he'll drop dead at the mere mention of himnoteJ.J:(laugh)...You serious?Nice try,but with the key words being "looks like", all you did was justcall a kettle black, Dr. Pot!Glad to hearthat you enjoy my work enough to use it, though!Thosedestructive duplicates of a dead bounty hunter who let one of their own fall to evil for petty reasonsnoteDespite that one child being amongst their ranks, I would advise Sage doesn't befriend those hooligans for her own safety and also mineThatpointy-eared, green-blooded hobgoblin who can't even talk about his family without being embarrassedThatgreen one with the bad sense of hygienethat I have theunfortunate pleasure of sharingan actor withThatderanged weapons manufacturer CEO who seriously thinks himself a "hero" and "adequate parent"noteJack:I was protecting my Angel from those filthy freakin' bandits! You're lucky you don't have a neck for me to strangle you with!Me:Sure, you were and look where that got you. And need I remind you to practice what you preach. There's a child present here.Yet anothergun-toting lunkhead with firepower to give Omega a run for his moneyThosetwo spliced mice who make up one half of a brain combinednoteThe Brain:Clever, but despite your trepidatious triflings, you've only described one half of the equation—that half being Pinky, of course. I, however, dwarf your intelligence despite my meager mouse size, and am far more of your equal than that elusive Erinaceidae you cannot defeat.Me:So one quarter of a brain. Well, then! Thank you for clarifying! Ohohoho!Thatinsufferable clown and so-called personification of chaosnoteJoker:Oooh, look folks! Anotherso-called geniuswho thinks he's got my number! Listen, Bluto! Unlike you, I've got a better handle on my pest problem, I've managed to reduce entire universes to laughing fits,and I won two Oscars!So if you've got something to say to my face... I'll just put a nice, BIG smile on yours! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!Me:No need.Got my own.Hope you enjoy the air strike!Thatcopycat of the clown who destroyed his own world and has nothing to show for itnoteKefka:That would be the point;showingliterallynothing!Me:Well then. Glad we agree. Goodbye.Thatgirlfriend of the clown with a horrible fashion sensenoteMake it look like an accident, SageThatbackwards buffoon who gets more easily tricked than my own minionsThatlepidopteran-themed fool obsessed with magical trinketsnoteEven though the Chaos Emeralds are a thing, I still switch it up every now and then, and I also have hobbiesThathonor-driven cat king who reminds me too much of that cat princessnoteMe:I must say, your technological advancements are impressive. Shame they're wasted on such a small and insignificant nation.T'Challa:Our nation may be small, but we are strong and we use our technology for the betterment of our people, not for selfish gain.Me:Oh? Selfish gain? Boy, do you sound like a broken record. Don't you ever get tired of being so "honorable" and self-righteous?T'Challa:No matter what, I will always strive to uphold the values of Wakanda and protect its people, even in the face of those who seek to harm us.Me:Ha! You may have your precious values, but I have my own vision for the world. And with my intellect and resources, I'll for sure achieve it. And if your kingdom gets flattened along the way, tough luck.Thatgreen giantess who's better known for attracting male simps than being an actual lawyerorher cousin with a temper tantrum problem and a severe case of D.I.D.noteThe Hulk:HULK THINK BREAKFAST EGGHEAD HAS OWN PROBLEM WITH CUTE ANIMALS! HULK SMASH EGGHEAD!!!Me:At least I don't speak in broken English, you big baby!Joe Fixit:You got a problem with us, fatso?She-Hulk:Save it, Joe. He's not worth smashing. Lawsuits are another story and he's been served!Thatcurmudgeon cephalopod who impressively has a worse pest problem than I donoteSquidward:What can I say?It's a gift.Thataforementioned pest with the annoying laughnoteSage, keep your distance, you'll catch his stupidThatoafish robot dinosaur who even Knuckles is smarter and stronger againstnoteGrimlock:Me, Grimlock no oaf! Me, Grimlock king! Me, Grimlock strongest, smartest dino built! And who Knuckles? Me no have knuckles! No matter, me, Grimlock strong enough to bash knuckle, maybe even your knuckle, eggy!Me:I'd like to meet the so-called "genius" who built you. Even my own oafish lackeys display more sense!Thatoversized panda with all the size of Big the Cat and none of the mute buttonThatsarcastic slug whom I dare to try and "investigate" menoteRoz:Don't tempt me. I've been looking for an easy investigation for a while now. Hope you enjoy filing paperwork!Thatpompous French candleKuzco, yet anotherinsult onto itselfThatoverly depressed donkeyThatovertly annoying fowl who has the nerve to brag about his every breath takennoteGlad he isn'tmyproblem to deal withThatother-overtly annoying braggart of a fluff ballThatcooky conspiracy theorist who doesn't even know his wife's a cheatThatblue-colored bungler who looks more like a discount Sonicman than an actual threatThatlanky coward the Internet thinks is some sort of God, orhis bespectacled compatriot who can't go five seconds without losing her glassesThatbald, far more inferior scientist with a grudge against an alien yet somehow became PresidentnoteLex Luthor:As if your own grudge against a certain blue animal was any less petty and must I remind you that I successfully conquered the universe more times that you ever did?Me:That's a nice argument.Unfortunately, I planted a bomb in your penthouse while you were sulking about the aforementioned alien.Thatso-called "God" who can't even locate a single formula to save his miserable existencenoteDarkseid:Your insults are infantile at best. I will not waste my time nor my energy on you, because seeing you struggle and fail against an insignificant blue creature is punishment enough. Such is the will of Darkseid.Thatgrape-flavored Internet clone of the aforementioned "God" with the fancy glove and bizarre infatuation with the reapernoteThanos:To love Death with all my artful heart is not an infatuation, it is a privilege. Something you'll experience firsthand.Either one of thosespoiledbratswhose only real contributions were to a colleague of mine's research rather than winning against that blockheaded country hicknoteDr. Gero:Oh, thank you. It's a shame that our creations keep backfiring on us.Me:Yeah. At least I'm still alive to learn how to mitigate that issue. I could help teach you a few tricks.noteVegeta:Youdareto call the Prince of all Saiyans spoiled? I will have you know I won more battles than you ever did!Me:Oh, sure, you'veneverunderestimated an opponent's strength! Don't worry, I'm a doctor, you can come crying to me when you mangle your other arm.Thatfat pink blobwho can't speak properlynoteBuu:Buu don't like ugly mustache eggman!Thatlittle red creature who has an annoying high-pitched voice and speaks in the third-person, thatflippant little vampire who can't do more than basic arithmetic, thatcantankerous green creature who lives inside a trashcan of all things, or somemindless cookie-obsessed blue creaturenoteOscar:Hey, you leave them out of this!Pick on someone who would normally talk back!Thatschlock host who always puts those stupid teenagers into dangerous contests for his own sick amusementnoteThen again, his contests have given me some brilliant ideas on how to deal with that blue rodent and his friendsThatso-called "diva" who was gullible enough to participate in those aforementioned contestsnoteHeather: Tch, whatever.Thatmoronic muscle-bound loser who lives with his mother and couldn't get a date at the grocery storenoteJohnny Bravo: No, you're the loser! You're not handsome and manly like Johnny Bravo! Hr-Hah-Hr! And babes love me and not some bald, egg-shaped freak who always loses to a hedgehog!Me:Like howyou lose to everyone else, right?Thatactor/martial artist with an overinflated egonoteJohnny Cage:Oh, like you're one to talk, buddy.Thatold geezer who gets constantly vexed by his neighbor's bratty kidnoteMr. Wilson:You're in the same boat as me, pal. You're being bedeviled by a blue teenager.Me:Least I don't cry about it in my sleep.Anotherold geezer who lives in some wasteland and treats his scaredy-cat of a dog like complete garbagenoteSeriously, what does his wife even see in himThatwashed-up anthropomorphic horse who was once an actor for a hokey sitcomThatmasked man with the long sharp claws which make Knuckles' spiky fists look subtlenoteAlthough Icoulduse some of that adamantium for my robotsThatoverzealous idiot alien who couldn't conquer a coldThatloud-mouthed, flamboyant ninjaAnotherninja who's more of a one-trick ponyThatwallflower of a kunoichi who somehow became the wife of the newly appointed "Hokage"Thatmanchild of a "god"noteTerumi:Oh*bleep*off, you dateless turbo-nerd. Hey, why the*bleeep*am I being*bleeep* *bleeep* *bleep*?Me:Nuh-uh-uh. Child present here. You're being very naughty, dear boy.Yetanother so-called personification of "chaos"noteBill Cipher:EXCUSE ME? YOU DARE COMPARE ME TOTHAT BUFFOON? I AM BEYOND YOUR UNDERSTANDING, AND FAR MORE POWERFUL THAN ANY MERE AGENT OF CHAOS. AND AS FOR MY PLAN, LET'S JUST SAY THAT I HAVE WAYS OF GETTING WHAT I WANT THAT ARE BEYOND YOUR LIMITED COMPREHENSION. AS FOR MY DEFEAT, THAT WAS JUST A TEMPORARY SETBACK. YOU'LL SEE SOON ENOUGH WHAT I'M TRULY CAPABLE OF.Me:Hmph, you talk a big game, but it seems to me like you're just a petty trickster with delusions of grandeur. I've dealt with my fair share of megalomaniacs before, and they all end up the same way: defeated, forgotten and DEAD. As for your defeat at the hands of a couple of kids, well, let's just say that I wouldn't be so quick to judge. After all, you seem to have a knack for underestimating your opponents. Just remember, overconfidence is a weakness, and it's a mistake that I won't be making.And I already MAKE gold, anyways, so there!Thatlazy, ketchup-obsessed skeleton with the annoying habit of making jokesnoteI have no idea how anyone can keep up with him. Also, if he ever shows up, I'll show him the true meaning of a "bad time"Flowey, for lack of a better insult and because he'sno one'sbest friendnoteAnd that includes you, Sage. Make sure you terminate him on sight and dispose of him immediately afterwardsThatobsessive girl with the precognitive diary and a level of boy-craziness that makes Amy Rose look shyThatjailbait who has a boy wrapped around her finger and treats him like a dognoteThere's something not quite right about herThatbratty little sandbox bully that thinks she's the crème de la crèmeThatbizarre girl with amphibian powersThatannoying mole who hates when people mess with save statesThatinsane wannabe salesman puppet who keeps incessantly rambling about deals and sales and sizenoteIf he ever pokes his nose around here, I'll show him what areal"big shot" isThatcantankerous ape who rants about the "good old days" when technology and intellectuals were more primitiveThatrhyming hag with a grating voice and a misguided belief in her own villainous prowessnoteGruntilda Winkybunion:Oh, Eggman, you foolish mustachioed buffoon! Your technological contraptions are no match for my magical prowess. Prepare to be hexed into oblivion, you bumbling fool!Me:Oh ho ho! Nice try but the anti-magic technology I recently installed works against you! Also, that didn't rhyme. Wah wah.Yetanother reptilian so-called ninja created thanks to a bunch of growing green glopThatblind little girl who uses martial arts to play with dirtnoteMe:And yes, I know she can toy around with metal like the affront to engineering that she is. If she ever decides to come around, I'll make sure to switch to plastics and bamboo. I'm prepared.Toph:You're lying and you know what happens to liars. Enjoy having your base bended in more ways than—Opal:Grandma, we've been looking for you! Let's get back to Republic City!Toph:Oh, come on! I was about to have some fun here!Me:Well. I guess that just… sorted itself out. Anyway…Thatweird pyramid that babbles bizarre phrasesnoteCould be useful,but don't pick up any of its assistant's habits, SageAnd last and least, thatso-called "master of magnetism" mutant who is very deluded into thinking he's their leader and yet obeys the wheelchair-bound idiotnoteMagneto:Perhaps this master should teach you a few lessons in respecting your elders. Your metal base will soon be scrap metal.Me:Hoo boy.Toph:Yeah, Magneto! Let's show this shlock doctor that metalbenders are not to be trifled with!(Quickly uses a tech box to restore my base back to normal after those twoannoyingmetalbendingfreaks)…you should therefore feel grateful that I'm willing to indulge an audience such as yourself with thefarmore superior tale of my own history. Especially since I'm in such a good mood today! If I wasn't, well…(cue the surrounding laser cannons)…I'd already be cleaning you out the dustpan for just daring to snoop around. Orbot! Cubot! Fetch me some snacks! We have a priso— I mean,guesthere who wants to learn about my wondrous being!Orbot:Really, boss? I don't suppose this is your latest method in how to interrogate hostages in cruel and unusual ways, is it?I don't suppose you'd like to be a guinea pig for those "methods" yourself, Orbot?Orbot:Uh… no, boss! Fetching snacks now!Thought so.Ahem. Now, I shouldneedno introduction, but…I am Dr. Ivo Robotnik, radiant revolutionary,creative combatant, efficacious engineer, mechanical mastermind and the greatest scientificgeniusin the world! But no thanks to the help of a certain little blue pest and his entourage, you lot may know me better under the moniker of "Dr. Eggman". Nevertheless, I've since reclaimed that petulant playground insult and nowadays justhearingthe phrase "Eggman Empire" strikes fear into the hearts of the masses! Besides, I like eggs. Symbol of life, proven brain food, and their flattering little shape reminds me so much of myself! On that note, I'm also especially fond offried chickenandhoagies. Aworld rulershould have all the elements of a true epicurean, wouldn't you think?Cubot:Ooh, ooh! We got the snacks you asked for, boss!Adequate timing, Cubot. Where was I, anyways? Ah, yes!While I've always been a visionary since I was a young lad learning from my similarly brilliant grandfather Gerald, my humble career as an aspiring global conqueror beganall the way back on South Island, a strangely locomotive treasure trove of ancient ruins and interesting secrets. Like clockwork, I set to mining and mechanizing the island for its resources, used the local wildlife as batteries to power my army of Badnik soldiers (through means that your feeble mind couldn't possibly understand), and set to searching for the Chaos Emeralds, fabled jewels with the infinite potential to turn thoughts into reality. By which I mean use their power to rule all I see fit. So far, South Island had fallen under my boot and everything was going smoothly……that is, until HE showed up.I am of course referring to oneSonic the Hedgehog, a three-foot-tall blue adolescent anthropomorphic erinaceinae that has since rubbed me the wrong way for three good reasons. One, he hasincredible speed. Two, he has an evenmoreincredibleattitude problem. And three,EVERYTHING ELSE!That spiked little hoodlumimmediatelywent to wrecking all my machines, all my infrastructure and all my perfectly produced plans! And to add insult to injury, THAT LITTLETHIEFSWIPED THE CHAOS EMERALDS FROM RIGHT UNDER MY NOSE!NNNNNNGH—!(inhale, exhale)But no matter. It was just one teensy little loss. Even geniuses have bad days every once in a while.I picked myself back up, moved to the next island over and redoubled my efforts and operations, searching for any more useful things along the way, all to complete and maintain the Death Egg, my ultimate orbital dreadnaught and battle-station—no, no, it was a wholly original concept, thank you very much. Bring upthose space operasone more time and I'll shoot. Moving on.Unfortunately for humanity's greatest genius, Sonic was also vacationing at West Side Island and had recently adopted a fox kit street urchin named Miles Prower, who just so happened to havea proficiency in the wonders of technologythat gave him and Sonic even more ways to counter me. And he also had two tails that he could spin together to somehowfly like a helicopter, as if biology couldn't pull enough stupid surprises out of its rear end. And somehow, Sonic and "Tails" eventually tore the island from my grasp, Sonic chased me through my Wing Fortress and all the way to the Death Egg, butthenI left him cowering at the might of my brand new state-of-the-art battlesuit!(sigh)Which he then promptly defeated, before he saw fit to knock my flying masterpiece out of orbit and send it tumbling back down to the planet.But as luck would have it, it wound up on the mystical Angel Island, a floating landmass where the counterpoint to the Chaos Emeralds, the Master Emerald, was kept. But it likewise had an over-eager caretaker in Knuckles, the last of the fabled echidnas. Fortunately for me, he had brainpower equal to that of a styrofoam packet, so all I had to do was assert that I was a researcher who came to study the egg and help him if it caused any trouble. And that there was also this crazy hedgehog who liked collecting precious emeralds.The poor sucker fell for it, hook, line and sinker! Ahaha! Sure enough, by the time Sonic and his little savant showed up to investigate the mysterious fallen island, me and Knuckles had already turned it into a paradise of diabolical traps, with the red doofus taking extra care in making their little excursion all the more miserable! And with enough time, I made my move, swiped the Master Emerald from Knuckles when he couldn't do anything to stop me, and my glorious Death Egg was back in business! It was all such a wonderful, perfect turn of events—…And then that lousy hedgehog managed to jump onboard my Death Egg once more. And used the Chaos Emeralds to turn into"Super Sonic". And blew up my Death Egg for real this time. And swiped back the Master Emerald from me after destroying what I had left.Oh, well! You know what they say, whatdoesn't kill you in the harsh, cold vacuum of spacemakes you stronger!Of course, most of you may know that these weren't theonlyescapades I had in my quest for world domination. If I were as thorough as I have been, we'd be here all day, but just to sum things up:There wasthat time I succeeded in capturing Sonic and two of his friends, and put them through an island designed to kill them. It wasreallycathartic to see them screaming and panicking all the way through.Sometime after my plans at South Island were ruined,I took over Little Planet, a small world with the secrets to controlling time itself. It's especially notable that it's also when I made my most prized creation, my dearMetal Sonic.(Metal Sonic walks into the room with a menacing expression but says nothing)Lovely, isn't he? And he can give that blue showboater quite the literal run for his money! Retroactively, the Mecha Sonics were created as offensive countermeasures against that blue pest albeit at the expense of speed.Oh, yeah.There was something about a volcano and a pinball security system. I think.Or maybe not.I once went to an island with mystical dimension-jumping birds known as Flickies to try to make their power my own.I released the water god Chaos from his Master Emerald prisonso I could power him up with the Chaos Emeralds, allowing him to flatten Station Square for me to build my Robotnikland utopia on top. And then he turned on me. He destroyed Station Square on his terms without my permission, just because I didn't save him from the crash of my flying fortress or something.Ingrate.Sometime after that, I broke into a government facility to reclaim my grandfather's work, a black hedgehog named Shadow who called himself the "Ultimate Life Form". Still don't understand what the old man was thinking in regards to design choices. More importantly, there was also the Space Colony ARK, his masterpiece of science and ingenuity, complete with thestar-piercing Eclipse Cannon! And then he (posthumously) turned on me. Heset up the ARK to crash into the planet, all because he wanted revenge on the military for… killing my cousin, Maria. Destroying the world out ofgrief, Gerald? All for your poor dead granddaughter while I wasright there?Really?For goodness' sake, you were my hero…Metal Sonic was soon getting too uppity for his britches and modified his hardware to shapeshift and copy bio-data.And then he turned on me.He promptly threw me into a closet, took over my operations while having thegallto masquerade as me, and prompted Sonic and his friends to face him as part of a greater plan to build a "robotic kingdom" for himself. Thankfully, he was given the proper spanking from all those wimpy heroes, and I've since made sure that he won't go through a phase as brazen as that again. Isn't that right, Metal?(Metal just looks away)I thought so. Now get back to work!My greater schemes were put on hold againwhen I had to fight off the Black Arms during their invasion.And yes, Iamunfortunately aware of the insipid alternate timelines where Shadow… ugh…finishes me off. I concur with a "Clement" fellow in that he should've at leasttriedto join my side in at leastonepossibility. It'd be more constructive for him than whatever that dribble about "protecting the ARK" was about.I discovered an ancient battle robot my grandfather had in storageonly for Sonic and his friends to swoop in and give it a hokey personality under the equally hokey name of "Emerl". Following his death, I reverse-engineered the leftover technology into a new, better robot of my own andsplit the world into seven piecesusing the Chaos Emeralds' powers over time and space.And then he turned on me.He upgraded himself with the Emeralds and I was forced to reel him in with that meddling hedgehog's help.I once learned of a parallel universe to our own with its own set of mystical emeralds, and ran into my so-called "alternate self", Eggman Nega.Quite the handsome…knock-off, I suppose. We planned to use those Chaos and Sol Emeralds to make a bold new cross-dimensional Eggmanland of our very own, only for Sonic to show up alongside Nega's own nemesis, a fire-wielding princess named Blaze the Cat. Always has to be one in every crowd. We later tried something like that again in "his" dimension with its immense dimensional "Power of the Stars", but… well, you know.And then he turned on me.He revealed that he was really a descendant of mine who went back in time to reclaim the glory of our family name byturning the world into a card or destroying it with a stupid inter-dimensional fire demon. I've since disownedthat lunatic. Not that I've ever truly believed we were related, mind you!Some nonsense with genies,aliensand hoverboarding thief birds. And what I got out of all that aside from my business ventures being humiliated was nothing more than athrow rug.There's a vague memory in my mind of when I apparently tried to kidnap a princess, and something about disaster flames…?Eh, I also remember looking elongated and poorly-dressed, so perhaps it was just a fever dream.I tricked Super Sonic into helping me shatter the planet into piecesso that I could harness the energy of Dark Gaia, the entity sleeping inside it. And soon, I used the energy tofinallycomplete Eggmanland, a glorious theme park fully dedicated to me, and perfectly designed forsending obnoxious hedgehogs to their graves!And then…(sigh)…Dark Gaia turned on me. It reconstituted itself into a physical form, knocked me into space and tried to destroy everything on the planet before Sonic and his "Light Gaia" sidekick pummeled it back into the ground.I completed another theme park, this time in outer space, under the guise that I had changed my ways for the better.Ha!In truth, I had discovered a race of aliens known as the Wisps that had unique life energies, of which I could drain to power a mind-controlling ray pointed towards the planet below! And then Sonic loused it up.Yet again.As I was floating in the emptiness of space, I came across a primordial entity that could tear apart time to my will.I promptly used it to crash Sonic's little birthday celebration, perfected it into an ultimate weapon with the help of my past self, and sent that hedgehog through a menagerie of traps across time and space! And thentwoSonics promptly loused up our plans to rewrite the world, and we were then left bickering to one another in a timeless white void. I don't quite recall how we escaped… maybewe found the door?I tried to take over a planetoid using some obnoxious creatures known as the Zeti.And then they turned on mebecause Sonic stupidly punted away THE ONLY THING that kept them from doing so before!I did however manage to trick him and Tails into getting rid of those oversized talking splinters for me, and wouldn't you have it, I climbed back to the top from nothing! And then that hedgehog beat me again. Moving on.But guess what?I ACTUALLY MANAGED TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!OOOOOHOHOHOHO!I almostwon! Sonic was beaten, and without theirprecious hero, all I needed to do was mop up his little friends until everything was under my heel! And all this was possible thanks to this magical jewel I found called the Phantom Ruby.All the way over in another dimension— by which I mean the dimension of time and thus the past,I wouldn't expect someone like you to have the genius to grasp it all—I found this fantastic jewel known as the Phantom Ruby on Angel Island, but following a battle with Sonic and my new, at the time, traitorous creation, both the Phantom Ruby and the past version of Sonic ended up in the future at different points in time.But what fortune for the me of said future, as I found out the Ruby couldform illusions so convincing that they could affect the actual reality of those under its power. I found a good guinea pig for it in this exploitable little jackal mercenary who got a knot in his tail over Shadow beating him up. He promptly assimilated with the Ruby and renamed himself "Infinite", and with help from some illusionary replicas of four past traitors to me, he managed to defeat Sonic!Victory was mine!Soon, entire nations submitted to my power! Those military try-hards at GUN were cleaned right off the map! In just a mere six months, EVERYTHING had fallen to the might of the Eggman Empire!Butno, somedumb lucky Sonic fanaticwho joined the "Resistance" against me justhadto help free Sonic from his prison, Infinite just couldn't be bothered to do his job right andtore holes in my plans one by one, and the aforementioned two Sonics and their new little friend eventually trashedevery last bitof my master scheme! All my planning,all my plotting,I finally hadeverythingAND THOSE PESTS STILL HUMILIATED ME TO THE ENDS OF THE EARTH!NNGGGGRRRAAUUUGH!!!Cubot:N-now, boss! Breathe!Breathe!Remember your blood pressure!YES!(inhale, exhale)Yes, Cubot.I know.So what next, you might ask? Well, I'm just undergoing some downtime right now, but I assure you that I've got some new revenge schemes planned out, and next timeI will be victorious!Especially sincemy newest discoveryseems promising... except... ugh, I basically had to team up with that blue pest to save the world from a thing that destroys worlds or so I was told. I mean, sure, I had my AI assistant who basically got really interested in him, but I'm probably gonna have to keep a close eye to ensure she doesn't go out again, just like when she left me and sacrificed herself to save the world. Doesn't she know how I wept for her after seeing the world saved?! Kids these days, no respect!But as an aside, I do have this little pet project.(I go to a computer screen and type in some commands, with the screen then showing different versions of me)Impressive, is it not? I managed to tap into the space-time spectrum for a bit and found out that there's even more versions of yours truly out there!First off, here's a reality whereI was more absurd in character— yet no less devilishly dangerous— and also had two (sometimes three) hench-bots so bumbling that they make me feel a little more grateful for Orbot and Cubot. By about, say, one percent. He also coined the "I hate that hedgehog!" catchphrase that other versions of me have used, and once had this time-travel escapade where he collected his world's Chaos Emeralds and briefly achieved godhood with them. Unfortunately, he wasn't themostfeared person in his reality. That honor was taken by his mother ofMomma Robotnik. Yeah, I'd… I guess it makes sense from that standpoint. It's a close second place.Ooh, and here's one whereI conquered Sonic's little homeland and made it my own. And I mean, yes, he's got the villainy down, sure, but I'm honestly not a fan of his aesthetic choices. Coincidentally, there'san alternate version of THAT universe where my empire was going strong and had half the planet in its grasp… until something called a"Genesis Wave"warped that world into something more akin to my universe. Wonder who'd have been stupid enough to causethatto happen.There'sa lesser-known realitywhere I began as the goody-two-shoes Dr. Ovi Kintobor, who sought to rid the world of evil using a special machine and the Chaos Emeralds, but an accident involving it and a rotten egg (and a Sonic from the future) transformed him into yours truly. Thanks to some time-travel shenanigans, he managed to get Sonic out of the way and take his rule over the planet until a planet-wide EMP trashed all his machines. Afterwards, he teamed up with fish cyborgs, briefly attained godhood, got warped to a subatomic world, and then performed an unceremonious rage quit by attempting to destroy the very planet he intended to conquer, which was enough for even his deathly loyal right-hand-man to give up on him.You had me and you lost me, other self.There's one whereI tried to destroy the planetso I could… procreate with an annoying humanoid cat-girl and repopulate whatever remains? I swear, that version of me must have some very,veryweird tastes. That's where my curiosity ends, thankfully.And another one whereI ousted Sonic's birth mother from her throneand had to deal with him and his siblings'annoying rock musicwith… two other bumbling sidekicks? That were ugly dog-things instead of robots, no less?One whereI accidentally sent Sonic and his friends to a human-filled realm where he made friends with a young brat and some events of my universe still transpired, and I yet again had two (sometimes three) bumbling sidekicks. I'm sensing a pattern here.And there's another whereI… don't really do much of anything villainy-wise.I mean, I'm more…butch, I guess? The Sonic there also has longer limbs, blue arms, and duct tape worn around his arms and shoes. Not sure what the big deal with that is.And my latest find,a universe with an identical history to my own up until my use of the Phantom Ruby.Seems that this me managed to make a metallic virus at one point that transformed the masses into his mindless slaves. Very interesting. It's too bad he let it slip out of his control, not to mention how that platypus brown-nose ruined everything else. He sadly doesn't seem to show up that much, either.Now there's anew universe where my alternate self found an artifact called the Paradox Prism. As per tradition, that impulsive insectivore tried to interfere and he and his friends get sent to alternate worlds for their troubles including one where I took over the world and exist as a council of five people willing to share. Yes, dimensional travel never stops being weird.noteOrbot:Sir, that onemight actually beourreality.Me:Meh, given all the discrepancies it has compared to our timeline (and our dear readers' disillusionment with cross-media), the higher-ups of our series could just as easilychange their tune about itwhen they feel it's time to de-clutter again. Give it a few years, Orbot. It doesn't just happen with us.Orbot:But I thought—Me:Also, don't try to correct me again. I'm the genius here.There was also thisbizarre incidentwhere I became a disembodied spirit by an entity that could put the likes of Dark Gaia and the Time Eater to shame and rivaled only by THE END. I've been told that Sonic was among those who managed to keep their bodies and fight back during the whole affair, but I am confident that this "Mr. Sakurai" I've heard about or a successor of his will allow me to do the same the next time something like this happens. Which I'm sure you also desire. Demand that your voices be heard and get me into that championship! That's an order!Cubot:Ooh! Ooh! Hey, boss! What about the one where you're all skinny and look like somefamous comedy actor?Oh, yes,the more heavily-detailed and beady-eyed one.That version of me was apparently working with the government in that universe, and he had… hair. At least until his version of the blue mutant exiled him to a mushroom wasteland,but that's been rectified since.Lack of gut aside, Idolike the cut of his jib, and his glorious new 'stache on top of it. I shall be watching this new universe with very keen investment.And that's the big jist of all you need to know about the gentleman genius that is yours truly. I only hope hearing my story has taught you everything that being a scientist is all about: find something, continue searching until you can understand it… and then exploit it for your own purposes!Nyahaha!Hmm? You still want to know more? Well, I think I've said quite a lot, but why deny my audience an encore performance? Especially one as, er…"captive"as you are. Now, further bask in my greatness, and ensure you write me with authenticity, FOOLS!Tropes associated with your planet's future ruler, in all his incarnations:Ace Pilot: Ah yes, I'm an absolute master at piloting aircraft! I've also seen all of my versions being masterful pilots too. Eventhat one version of me who was with the governmenthad a high-tech aircraft to call his own and he could also pilot it with ease and go really fast doing so!Acrofatic: Ho ho! Remember, I'm aprofessional Olympic athlete, a notedExtreme Gear championand I've evenkept pace with the rodentin the past. And I'm sure you've been taught by countless other media that even piloting cutting-edge battle mecha involves a lot of stretching and multitasking, which you can infer yours truly does on the regular.Adaptational Angst Upgrade: Not as bad as the rodent's alternate self,but there's this version of methat grew up as an orphan and had to deal with bullies. Iwon'twaste time telling you if my childhood was nearly as much of a drag, but you already know that I at least havea grandfather. Oh, right. Also his granddaughter. Which would thus make her my cousin… bah, who cares?Adaptational Badass: Can you believe there've been no less thantwootherversionsof me that used the Chaos Emeralds to achieve godhood and became aReality Warper, and that there's arecent version of methat he could justabsorbjust the Master Emerald's power by itself,withoutthe Chaos Emeralds andwithoutneeding to use it to power a robot first? The latter me even hadtelekinesis,the power to sense people's brainwaves, andChaos Controlitself! If I had tried this sooner, perhaps things would've been so much easier for me!Adaptational Dumbass: The newer version of me fromthat comichadundergone his own war with the Resistancewith what I can believe was the sameplanningandforesightthat I utilized… and yethe carelessly allowed his Zombot virus to spiral out of his controland did nothing about it until hisplatypus brown-nosebrought in the Deadly Sixof all peopleto screw both of them over. I'd hardly say I'd ever fallen to such passivity before. Granted, I've heard that he's regained some rationale lately throughbreaking said platypus in mind, body and spirit, but if he hadn't screwed up his own plan in the first place, perhaps Starline wouldn't have been uppity enough to try and prove himself his "superior"."Big oof", nonetheless.Adaptational Nice Guy: Hold on,WHAT!?I mean, Iama complicated guy, but… ugh. Let's see here:It seems that whenever I happen to beat the Olympics,hosting an online question-and-answer sessionor doingsome other kind of recreational activitywith the rat and his ratpack, I'm morefriendly, affable and down-to-earth with them.I don't know what comes over me, but rest assured, it's back to the grind the moment that all ends.The version of me fromthat animeand itstie-in comictakes the cake, however. Not only is hemore personable with his opponents to the point of casually showing up to their pool party, but he's also willing to sanitize his own villainy for the alleged reason ofnot scaring off the younger members of his audience. And then there's his most egregious quote of all, "It's one thing to take people PRISONER and THREATEN them, but when you actually HURT somebody, that's going TOO FAR!" Which he says in spite ofyearsof attempts on his Sonic's life? Even afterrigging an explosive trap on himjust likeIdid!? Or does he also prefer to get it over with?Ugh.Moving on!Actually, scratch that.The butch version of meis evenmoresoft-boiled than the aforementioned anime me. He doesn't eventryto be a big, imposing adversary. Heck, despite allegedly wanting to destroy his foes, he's practically a glorified neighbor to them, and he's tried tobefriendhis version of Sonic more than once! I just—why!? For what reason!?Whichone's the sillier version of me again? Him orthe other one?Aesop Amnesia: Since my transition to the three-dimensional world, I've been subject to an unsavory trend of relying on powerful ancient entities to conquer the world… which, admittedly, ended upbiting me on the bumper.Fortunately, being the great scientist that I always am,I've learned from my mistakes and have improved immensely:I've managed to harness the power of theTime Eaterwithout ever losing control of it! Though, in fairness, it was already out of commission when I found it in the void of space, but that only added to the beauty of my whole scheme. With help from my younger self in perfecting it, that long drawn-out trend was finally broken!…Only for it to come back with a vengeance whenI lost control of the Deadly Six. Onlythattime, it was the fault of that reckless blue mammal who kicked the Cacophonic Conch out of my hand! Fortunately, after Sonic cleaned up his mess with those silly Zeti freaks,I managed to regain my status as the final boss under their noses!Hahaha!Another example to prove I've learned from my shortcomings is how I had the foresight put thatlousy jackalon a leash so I could dispose of him at a moment's notice. I considered how giving that lunatic the Phantom Ruby could backfire, but to my surprise, Infinite didn't choose to betray me. Though he still turned out to be the inverse of his namesake after screwing up one time too many, so with that, I decided togive him the boot, and he was never heard from again.Good riddance!Amusement Park of Doom: Ah, yes! I'm quite a fan of the genre, between the different theme parks I've put together over the years.Aside from when Itook over Casino Nightand turnedCarnival Night into a death trap for Sonic, I did once attempt to converta special little island into a resort for myself a while back… before that knucklehead and some other posers got involved with my plans. Where do vermin like them keep coming from, anyway?I also once put togethera park made of gold ringsthat GUN decided to snoop around in. And I think that mytalking photocopy tried his own luck at a few theme parks, too.But even those were paltry compared to the ultimate testament of my showmanship—Eggmanland!I finally managed to complete itwhen I cracked the world apart, andohohoho,it was so amusing to watch Sonic fumble about!But then Dark Gaia had to go and louse it all when he reformed himself!(sigh)My life dream's been stuck collecting dust ever since.But I was undeterred! I tried again and went bigger and better with my"Incredible Interstellar Amusement Park", the greatest amusement park the universe would ever see! Much as it was just a feint for my next scheme. It would've went smoothly if Sonic hadn't destroyed one of my security bots and sent one of its arms flying into my mind-control cannon, in turn causing my whole masterpiece to overload andimplode on itself into a black hole!(quietly sobs)That wonderful labor of love, gone in an instant before it could be the beacon of my conquest. This is why we can't have nice things, you know!And Your Little Dog, Too!: My alternate self has the number ofthat sheriff and his wifewho helped his Sonic. I suppose they'll be next on his list to eliminate.Antagonist in Mourning:When I had gotten rid of Sonic with that exploding capsule, I was admittedly...solemnin uttering a farewell to my "admirable adversary".But that doesn't matter, after all, turning that runt into space chunks was such agloriousvictory! At least until it turned out he had survived bysomehowusing Chaos Control with a fake Emerald. Blasted hedgehog!Appropriated Appellation: It was Sonic who named me "Eggman", but I've embraced the name! I made it my own!Although I am not going to adopt"Baldy McNosehair".Arch-Enemy: Have you even been paying attention? That pest Sonic doesn't know when to stay out of my business and just…diealready! It's as if we've been fighting fordecadesat this point!Artificial Family Member:I've come around to viewing myAI program, Sage, as my own daughter. No need to wait for nature to do the workwhen you're already a genius. Besides, with all the trouble she gave Sonic, she's a chip off the old block!The pointy-headed mecreated a robot son simply called "Robotnik Jr." Unfortunately, he turned on him and sided with Sonic. He also created a robot wife as part of his scheme to get elected President of Mobius.The butch version of mecreated "Mombot", a robot designed to act as his mother. Despite how he would effectively be her father. And somehow her son.Her father and her son.It'sreallynot surprising that this version of me has so many issues.Bad Boss: Bad?Me?Please, I'm a great employer!It's not my fault my lackeys can't keep up with my intellect! They should be lucky I don'tturn them intomindless slavesand instead let them keep their free will to help serve my empire! Willingly and happily, I might add!The Bad Guy Wins: Hmph! Sonic may get a majority of victories, but I've come out the victor a few times myself in my dimension and a few others.As stated above, I actually managed to hand Sonic his keister through the Phantom Ruby and Infinite, and took over the world! Okay, those annoying heroes managed to take it back, but it was still a solid victory nonetheless.That whole mess with the hover boards and birds?I came out on top in the end after they beat that evil genie… thing.The prize was still underwhelming, sadly.So what if it's amagicfloating carpet? I can't exploitthatfor my schemes!In another timeline, I teamed up with Sonic and his friends to fight some rogue echidna faction and stayed behind when they chased their leader into another dimension. Since time moved differently on both sides, it gave me ample time to take over the world by the time they managed to return. A shame I've never been able to find out what happened in that reality next, but it's good to see I had the royal flush of cards in the end! Ohohoho!Ineveryone's favorite printed dimension, an alternate version of me from another dimension (yes, I know, there's indeed a lot a dimensions involved here) had actually won in his universe by justnukingeverything on his planet. Predictably, he got bored, and he likewise couldn'truleover a dead husk, so he found out about the "prime" dimension within that set of realities and jumped over to fill the void left behind by their felled Robotnik! Just goes to show you can't keep a good doc down!Beware the Silly Ones: Silly?! Who calls a scientific genius silly? But I digress. I never let my "silliness" undermine my brilliancy and cunning!Big Bad: The ultimate adversary forallthe world's heroes, and don't you forget it!Boring, but Practical: There was one time I actuallystole Sonic's shoes and replaced them with speed-down boots. If I'd only done this more often rather than creating robotic duplicates and rousing ancient beings from their slumber, my problems would've been solved! But more importantly, it wasa wonderfully special kind of torture!Ho ho!Broken Pedestal: I was appalled when I learned that my grandfather reprogrammed the Space Colony ARK to come crashing down to the planet, destroying everything and everyone in the process, all so he could enact his revenge for the loss of his granddaughter.That mad scientist!Killingeveryoneon the planet, includinghis own grandson destined to rule it!?That's so impractical I can't even find the words for it!He should've just used the ARK itself to destroy those military geeks at GUN!...To be fair, this was before we all learnedwhat he really built the Eclipse Cannon for.That wasbrilliantforwhen the comet returned like he predicted!Card-Carrying Villain: Just had one printed yesterday for the occasion, actually. Allow me to read it out.Ahem."Dr. Ivo 'Eggman' Robotnik, super-genius. Glorious head of the Eggman Empire. Future world leader (singular), senior roboticist and engineer, and enthusiast in the complete enslavement of the masses and cultivation of natural resources. Contact details below."Catchphrase: Ah, yes! A brilliant scientist such as I should harbor an equally brilliant way with words:The timeless classic:"I HATE THAT HEDGEHOG!""All systems, FULL POWER!", "Get a load of THIS!", and (regrettably) "No way! I can't believe this!""Yosh!"for the expression of joy."Lights out!" and "You know what they say! The MORE the MERRIER!"I hear you Internet cretinstook a liking to the latter quotefor some strange reason."Get ready to be schooled!"Or was it meant to be "skewered"?"You little... you little--!""Time for a change of pace!"Cheshire Cat Grin: And it's perfectly photogenic, too!Complete Monster: Oh ho ho! Not usually, I admit, but I do admire when other versions of merefrain from any holding back.Theanimated version of meyou may have heard of turned that little kingdom from the inside out and transformed a planet's worth of opposition intomindless machines, including the blue buffoon's dear only unclewhen he was just a dumb little boy.D'awwwww!That similarlyprinted version of medid all the above and then some— experimenting on his own people, tearing apart families even more gleefully, creating a doomsday weapon to warp Sonic's home village into eternal non-existence— I'd argue it's a littlepointlessly excessivehere and there, but hey, all the more misery for the rodent! The version of him that came after (longstory) came close at times, but he didn't quite hit the mark. Something about wanting to be a robot dad.There was also one lesser-knownprinted version of methat once again ravaged cities and turned people into robots, and also permitted his forces to burn a whole continent to ashes to ensure they got the hedgehog. The kicker was that he threw Sonic, Amy and some outlying echidna princess into an active volcano while taking a photo of it to hang above the chimney. Quite classy, if I say so myself.Sure, you might overlook theoddball animated reality with all the horrible musical numbers, but the version of me there has been just as rotten as the rest. More lower-class fools and insolents have gotten turned into robots (cyborgs?) for their troubles, I've forced the three hedgehogs and their many loved ones to suffer at every opportunity… ooh, there's even one point where I sought to turn a sanctuary for the Resistance's childreninto a cemetery! Heh heh! Plus, I duped that reality's diminutive version of Knuckles into catching Sonic and his siblings for me even as the world was collapsing into chaos.Cut Lex Luthor a Check: Huh. It appearsthe man himselfis around here, too. But contrary to popular belief, I dohave plenty of perfectly legal money-making enterprisesof which I can use to further fund my schemes of conquest. I mean, what, did you think I wanted to rule the world for a reasonotherthan ruling the world?Despotism Justifies the Means: I don't view myself as particularly picky. As long as a place— be it primitive, advanced, pristine or otherwise— has beings thatcanbe enslaved, then that's good enough for me!Determinator: A lesser man would've thrown in the towel if he went through all the hardships I have. Unfortunately for the rodent who keeps thwarting my plans, I amnota lesser man. Iwillachieve my eternal Eggman Empire, and Iwilldestroy Sonic and all his stupid friends!Detonation Moon: Who could ever forget the timeI blew up half of the moon with the Eclipse Cannonjust to let everyone know that I'm going to conquer the world?Word has itthat the moon is still broken; it's just always facing the other way when we see it. Then again, my anime version fixed it (and called it the Eggmoon) as part of a scheme to block the sun. Heh. If only I had thought of that in the games!Didn't Think This Through: WHAT!? WHOSAYSI DON'T!?ALL MY PLANS ARE BRILLIANT!Okay, maybe I…havetended to overlook afewglaring flaws in my past schemes. Like maybe when you're trying to control mystic deities, find a way to keep a leash on them, as I did the Time Eater. Or maybe put some "safety protocols" into your devices should they go haywire. But I don't always havetimeto think of all that! I need to strike while the iron is hot when it comes to my brilliant concepts, and my nemesis isalreadya speedy little mongrel!Draco in Leather Pants:OH, FOR THE LOVE OF— uh…yes!You're right!Iamjusta tragically misunderstood genius with a big heart and perfectly noble intentions to make the world a better place!Unlike thatmean, sorry hedgehog, you must besuchagoodobserver! Now, now, I'm sure you're eager, but I don't need any sympathy for all the grief I've been given. I only wish to have your eternal servitude and obedience. And yes, youcouldrefuse, but would youreallywant to…(sniff)…hurt my feelings?The Dreaded: Ohohoho! Well, I do love to be feared. Even with all my losses to that insipid hedgehog, he and his little friends know I will always be back and won't rest until the world is mine!Enemy Mine: Loathed as I hate to admit it, there are... moments where even my genius can't overcome certain situations alone, with both Sonic and I having a common threat we have to take care of. Thus, we agree to team up to stop it, since Sonic wants to "save the world" like usual, and sinceI'd prefer there to BE a worldthat I can conquer later. More specifically, they wereon the ARK,against Gemerl,against the Zeti, andagainst that big monologuing rock. In other cases, we justregrettablyhappened to be in the same room.Enraged by Idiocy: Few things make my blood boil more than the sheer stupidity and uselessness of my mechanical underlings Orbot and Cubot. Then again, it's the expected price to pay for when you create those robots with less intelligence. On the plus side, it's impossible for them to (successfully) rebel against me that way.Even Evil Has Loved Ones: Okay, okay,fine, I'll admit it. I created anAI, Sage, to help me explore the Starfall Islands, and I've come to view her as my own daughter. Yes, it's not anything I'd ever think would happen given how usually the only heart I've ever needed or wanted ismine, but as I've said before… I'm a complicated guy. Besides, isn't it important to beproud of your own work?Even Evil Has Standards: I may be a ruthless, diabolical scientist, but I'm also a man of principle. Most notably, I wouldneverdestroy the entire planet out of petty revenge. After all,I would have no planet to conquer.I was disgusted and horrified when I had learnedmy grandfather betrayed his own species and home planet to Black Doom and his ravenous hive of monsters all in the name of research. But my assumptions were wrong, thankfully, he had built the Eclipse Cannon to deal with those alien mongrels when they would return fifty years later, a plan which Shadow sufficiently fulfilled.I was horrified when myso-called "alternate self" from the Sol Dimension activated the Egg Wizard's Planet-Buster Laserin a last-ditch effort to defeat Sonic and that cat princess. Another reason why I'm glad I'm notrelatedto that lunatic.That annoying little chihuahua assumed that I would starve Professor Pickle after I imprisoned him, but Tails assured him that I'm "not that cruel". And he was far from wrong. I gave him some slices of cucumber sandwiches at his request, but the old coot didn't appreciate this because they weren't his preferred size.Tsk!Everyone's a critic, even hostages!After activating my machine designed to sap life energy from the world, I made sure that it reaches a small threshold before turning it off since I only wanted to borrow some of it. But those Zeti rejects intended to takeallof the world's energy, which nearly destroyed this world!Despite successfully (and FINALLY) conquering the world, I grew sick of Infinite's petty and sadistic tendencies, especially when theyRUINED ALL MY PLANS. Once that useless jackal got his pathetic hide handed to him by Sonic and some random punk for the third time, I kicked him to the curve, and I don't regret it at all!Evil Versus Oblivion: There have been afewtimeswhere the entire world, no, all of reality itself was threatened by something beyond my control. That should bemyjob! But I begrudgingly left it to that meddlesome hedgehog to fix such messes. After all, I can't conquer the planet and expand the Eggman Empire if there's no planet left to begin with!Fat Bastard: Watch your language, bucko. And by the way, my weight has nothing to do with my supervillainous magnificence, thank you!Faux Affably Evil: Oh, no, no, I'd argue that description'sa load of hoopla.I'm quite the gentleman genius, and my universal conquest is simply a way for me to express mylove!Besides, I haven't blasted you to bits yet, have I,you little sneak?Flaw Exploitation: Let's say I have a track record of tricking that gullible echidna into fighting Sonic. And I had gained the advantage over Sonic by playing with that cocky ego of his.Fountain of Memes: It seems you lot have a vested interest inmimickingwhat I've said asI've been fighting the little ratin particular, and have a similar attitude towardsone of my other selves. It's… cute, I suppose. Unless it's mockery, in which case you can enjoysuperenslavement and/or a dirt nap down the line.In related news, I'm acutely aware ofthat little improv act worldwhere my quotability extended to nearly every breath I took. I won't say that cartoonishly oddball version of me isentirelyembarrassing given that he's the only one therewith any marginal lick of sense, but I feel he would agree with me in that you folks have your priorities out of order, such as focusing more on the moon'slittle experienceon than onthe girth and mightof what exactlygaveit that little experience.But I suppose willful ignorance like that is par for the course among those too little-minded to realize their own envy.Freudian Excuse:I wouldn't go as far as to use my background to get pity(and a great scientist like myself wouldn't need it from you ignoramuses) but youcouldargue that my desire to take over the world stems from my loathing of you humans for being so petty and inept (huge,hugeemphasis on the latter). An easy example would be how the government feared the scientific achievements of my grandfather instead of appreciating the brilliance behind them,but contrary to popular belief, I've never been up foravengingthe old fool outright. It's not the "Gerald Robotnik Memorial Empire", for Pete's sake. I would rather see his legacy as a base or template; something to reach its evolution through the efforts of an even more brilliant mind with just as much inclination to improve the world. And what better way formeto improve the world than by ruling it with an iron fist and proving once and for all thatI'mthe ultimate paragon of science and ingenuity? Ohoho!On another note, when Maria was riddled with bullets on the day of the ARK raid, all my family were sad about how such a special little snowflake passed away. Meanwhile,Iwas right there and already a budding prodigy,so what excuse did they have to ignore me while blubbering over someone who was gone?They should've recognized me as someone just as goodandjust as better! Geez. You won't seemebeing asshamefully neglectfularound Sage, I can tell you that!Final Boss: Back in the classic games, I was always the final challenge for you players to face! In the modern games, this tends to vary depending on when some other evil entity or group gets involved, but I've managed to reclaim this title somewhat. As nature intended.Game-Over Man: Did you mess up in keeping me from the Chaos Emeralds in the old games? Then you get to watch as I juggle them in your face! Better try again… or better yet,don't!Ohohohoho!Genius Bruiser: Believe it or not, I've demonstratedimpressive speed and strengthin the past, though I'll gladly let my machines do all the heavy work.Giggling Villain: And you'll like it, too!Back inthe daywhen I actually got a hit on Sonic or his sidekick, it would get a giggle out of me!Depending on the rendition of the Angel Island fiascothough, I either drop this habit, or I keep it up nice and well, even programming my stray Eggrobo to do the same!Hidden Depths: I happen to be a feminist. Surprised?You're all primed to be my minions, after all!Hijacked by Eggman:The Time Eater? MY brilliance! Even pretending to get sucked in by it.Impressed? And this was after years of having this pulled on me, by Chaos, the Biolizard, Metal Sonic of all things, Dark Gaia..."I Am" Song:E.G.G.M.A.N.Feast your ears on this glorious song dedicated to yours truly!Insufferable Genius: I have an IQ of 300 and have built machines that world governments can only dream of. If you were me,you'dsee everybody as a moron, too. But you're not me, and I pity your little mind for being unable to grasp the tragedy of that.It's All About Me: Well, of course it is! I have a brand name to uphold. It's theEggman Empire, not the "Everyone Else Municipality"!Joker Immunity: I've survived my bases exploding, many vehicle crashes, the harsh vacuum of space,inter-dimensional rifts,the droll space between time,being thrown into the stratosphere and back, andthe blue rat himself messing with my jetpack and sending me plummeting towards the ground. My own endurance aside, it just shows that I'm too much of an iconic evil genius to be killed off! Doing that would be a terrible mistake! Granted, there were thosethree phony endings where Shadow karate-chopped me to death, but those are of course obsolete— I'm too important to die, to put it simply, and I wouldn't have it any other way!Karma Houdini Warranty: You'd think constantly losing would already count as this, but I'll admit, I've been slipping as of late. After my flops, I usually managed to slip away unnoticed. It wasn't until Metal Sonicturned on methat my failures began blowing up in my face. I knew I shouldn't have hired the Chaotix of all slop detectives, but their greed made it too tempting.Lack of Empathy: My ingenious plans to conquer the world have inflicted mass destruction and untoldsuffering, you say? Pfft.Whatever!If anything, it's actually a rather useful reminder that I indeed leave a mark of my brilliance on the world. I'd say it's my own form of "tough love" for it.Laughably Evil: Funny?! ME?! Okay, okay, I must admit that I am quite the hilarious villain. Even when I'm planning on committing such nefarious deeds, I do tend to be quite the bombastic and entertaining fellow. And then there's my many interactions with my annoying and incompetent robot henchmen, Orbot and Cubot, that make me so annoyed in a comical way. Then there's that blasted hedgehog and his insufferable friends constantly making a fool out of me!Mad Scientist: That's me!Magnificent Bastard:OHOHOHOHO!Though perhaps it'd be fitting to call me theEggnificent… er,Bad Guy. I'm such a cut above the rest that I should be given my own title! As forsome specific timesof when my brilliance reached a peak:For me personally, there's quite a few cases:sending Sonic, Mighty and Ray kicking and screaming throughout their Eggman Island tomb;staying constantly one step ahead of Sonic as I restored Chaos more and more to full power;tricking that blue buffoon into cleaning up his Zeti-shaped mess for me; andeverythingI didto keep the Resistance from getting their easy victory.There's also that ancillary version of me from thatother timelinewhere I tricked Sonic and all his foolish little friends into practicallygivingme the world to conquer!Bwahahahaha!In the case of other dimensions, there'sthat animated version of methat contributed to the downfall of those Metarex aliens. While his propensity for…friendlinesswith the hedgehog still disgusts me, I can at least admire his actions in playing everyone like the dollar-store kazoos they were. His version of Sonic, however the life expectancy, has alotto give him credit for.Misanthrope Supreme: I'm not a fan of the other intellectually inferiorhomo sapiens(the present company looking at this page NOT excluded)and I couldn't care less if my plans have resulted in their suffering. In fact, their terror puts a smile to my face! Hahahaha!Mysterious Employer: AfterMetal Sonic rebelled against me and locked me in a room inside my flying fortress, I decided to hire those goofy detectives in helping me foil Metal Sonic's selfish plan in ruling the world for himself. But to avoid letting them figure out my identity since I am a world-renowned villain, I made myself a secret client for them. Unfortunately, I didn't make myself less obvious and the Chaotix figured out my identity (well Vector did, the other two only worked it after meeting me in person) and that bee brat stung me many times! And they forced me to pay them as promised! Grrr! Never again will I hire detectives!Narcissist: Oh, sure, use aninsultto describe my beautiful self-adoration.You're quite the intelligent specimen.Perhaps instead it would do you good to join in with worshiping meas if your life depended on it. Just a thought, just a thought.Never My Fault: Absolutely! I'm the world's greatest scientist! OfcourseI can do no wrong! Just to give an example, when Sonicrecklessly punted the Cacophonic Conch out of my grasp, I lost control of the Zeti, and they turned against me before deciding to drain the world's energy for themselves! Therefore, it was that blue buffoon's fault that the world nearly ended up in shambles! Wait, what? Where did you get the blasted idea that I wasabusingthose creatures!? I've already told you,I'm a GREAT employer!Noodle Incident: Apparently, one of my other selves oncemade his childhood bully eat through a straw for a year. Hmm.Noblewoman's Laugh:O~hohohoho!I'm one of the few men who can pull this off withstyle!Offscreen Villain Dark Matter: I'm sure your feeble mind is curious as to how I can afford building my robots, machines, flying fortresses, bases of operations, and space stations. Let's just say that, between all mystartup tech companies, resource mining operations and casinos, being the world's greatest scientist with an IQ of 300 has gifted me with a wholelottadough! Yes, there was that timeI didn't pay the Chaotix for their services after Metal Sonic locked me in a room, but I assure you that only happened because the Egg Fleet's construction costs took priority andnot because I was unwilling to give away perfectly good money to three slop detectives.Rooting for the Empire: There's at least a few continuities where I'm more liked than the obnoxious hedgehog. For example, in theold comic continuity, I provided the Dark Egg Legion sanctuary as long as they pledged their loyalty to me. Asmallprice to pay, yes, but considering how the Kingdom of Acorn was run by incompetents stuck in the Dark Ages made worse by adding in a bungling, bickering "council" of dimwits, and their so-called allies the Brotherhood of Guardians were a bunch of hypocrites when it came to technology being "evil" as well as letting their scion be easily manipulated by the likes of me, not to mention some of the more rabid splinter factions of so-called "Freedom Fighters", there were worse alternatives.Surrounded by Idiots: I can't seem to shake this pattern of having buffoons as my subordinates in any reality. Even when said lackeys have some intelligence like that wimp Snively or that platypus doctor Starline, they can't stand up to the magnificence ofmoiand I have to suffer for it. Then again, an idiotiseasier to keep under my thumb than someone with devious ambition, even if the two traits aren't mutually exclusive. Isn't that right,Starscream?Take Over the World: It's been my life's goal since I was a child! And it's whatI've already succeeded at once, too! Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha!Token Human: Depends on the dimension, but for the most part I tend to be the only human around aside from Sonic's fuzzy entourage. Or at the least the one with the most focus, as it should be!The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny: Oh ho ho! I rememberfightingfellow mad scientistDoctor Wilyalongside our robot armies.Wait, what? What do you mean, we both lost? To a viral-infected Metal Sonic?Blah!noteDr. Wily:Ha! And you know what? My ultimate creation, Zero, eventually put that metal hedgehog down! So I win in the end!Me:Can it! You just wait until I complete my own ultimate creation, a superior robot version of your… oh. I just realized I can't quite make a robot versionofa robot, but nevertheless, Iwillstill surpass you!Anyways, ya still good for Friday, Al?Dr. Wily:Yes, I'm still up for our genius get-together.Me:Great. See ya!Unwilling Roboticisation:Ah, yes, my magnum opus: turning organics into robots. Exquisite, isn't it? Sure, most scientists I showed it to claim it was "unethical", but what dotheyknow!? It's an untapped energy source and has been the heart of my operations ever since I started my endeavors. My alternate counterparts have even expanded it into converting humanoids into mindless robots. Plus, logically, it's a great form of immortality. No pain, no suffering from illness, you'll never run out of stamina that hinders your weak fleshy body, andyou'll never need to think for yourself ever again! It's genius!Genius, I say!Vile Villain, Saccharine Show: Youdostill remember when I tried to blow up Station Square andsucceededin blowing up the moon, right?Villainous Friendship: Even a number one like me is up for a little get-together with my fellow top dogs of ruthlessness and reverence. Gotta share success stories with someone, after all. Perhaps next time I'll meet up withthat Gerudo king.notePreferably, the original one with all the proper experience and history. Thenew onethat I've been informed of is… rather different.I'm sure you're all familiar with whoBowseris, along withthe times we spent together at the Olympicsexploiting regional power sources for our own ends. If his nemesis and mine ever get that action-packed adventure together that some of you lot have been asking for, I'll be sure to ring him up.noteBowser:Plannin' an attack on those nerdsoutsidethe Olympics...? DUDE. I have NEVER thought of that! Eggy, whenever you're ready to stomp out those red and blue chumps, I am TOTALLY on board! Gwa ha ha ha!And let's not forget onethe dear Dr. Albert Wily, the other magnificent man of machine mastery… but so far only in that one other timelinewhere we teamed upto rewrite reality— using technologymyother self invented— only for Sonic and Mega Man to show up and send everything south. We apparentlyteamed up on another occasionin those dimensions, but any data I can get from that point in time-space is pretzel-shaped andverycluttered. Hopefully, there'll be another opportunity for us to meet up, trade notes, share a drink, watch some good cinema, and blow those two little upstarts to bits!Bwahahaha!Villain Respect: There are things about people I dislike - ordespise- that simply have to be commended. Beingtrapped in Cyberspace depending upon Sage for everythingwill make you reflect on that, believe you me.For all the frustration and ruin that blasted hedgehog brought unto me, his naturalSuper Speedisn't a trait that many individuals are able to develop on their own in any given universe, and he was the first in mine to flaunt it. Such requires a modicum of begrudging respect, and I'm man enough to admit that. It'll make his inevitable destruction all the more thematically satisfying, after all.Tails has a natural knack for machinery and robotics that in many ways rivals my own. On one hand, I feel he's wasting that talent through his parasitic co-dependency with that cerulean curmudgeonandtheir combined "heroics". On the other hand, I havea fewdocumentedrecordingsthat remind mewhysaid parasitic co-dependency is still a good thing for me...I still recallthe days Amy Rose was easy bait for me to use against Sonic. These days, however, I've come to realize and accept that those days are long gone: her athleticism and skill with that hammer are eclipsed only by her raw determination. It's too bad how eventhatis outdone by her petulant infatuation with the blue showboater, though.Errgh.noteSage, I need you to simulate a battle where pinky here teams up in action with that plumber's main squeeze. I'll forward the results to Bowser later.Worthy Opponent: It's no secret thatIHATEthat hedgehog, but I will admit that I have some level of respect for him for being such a persistent adversary. It's why I chose to fight fire with fire using Metal, after all. Most evident is whenhe survived that exploding escape capsule by using Chaos Control with a fake Emerald.I suppose it means I'll have to be a little more sneaky next time, but that's no challenge.Would Hurt a Child: It seems some of you are prone to forgetting that most of my nemeses arebelow legal age and not even trying to hide it, which nevertheless has no bearing on the fact that I have worked tokill them in battleon a regular basis. Yes, even the schoolgirl rabbit, and even if the latest pest getting in the way of my plans was somehow a drooling infant with zero motor skills. I aim to run atidyoperation, thank you, and youth won't help you any more than age will if you dare to defy me. If anything, the extra layer of annoyance that comes with youth would further prompt me to get to the point.Me:So, are you finally convinced of my brilliant plans? …What!? You AREN'T!? Why, you… your poor judgement will be shown for what it is once I finish bringing my empire back up to snuff, so get ready for—! …Wait, why are the alarms blaring again? What's going onnow!?Alarm:[blares warning incessantly amidst the sound of my laser cannons, defences and robots getting destroyed]Orbot:Uh, well… don't be mad, boss… but while you were going over yourglorious history… well…Cubot:Sonic snuck in and he's wrecking the place.Me:WHAT!?(a pesky blue blur comes in and blows the door open)Sonic:Yo, Egghead! Thanks for the workout! Thought I'd give ya a personal house call on how well your last batch a' bots performed! …Oh. I see you've got a hostage. Hope I didn't embarrass ya too much in front of a captive audience! Lemme just grab 'em and… there we go!(the rat zooms off) Take care, Baldy McNosehair!Me:RRRAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH!I HATE THAT HEDGEHOOOOOOOOOOOOOGGG!!!!!!!Alternative Title(s):Doctor Eggman,Sonic The Hedgehog Dr Ivo Eggman Robotnik


Me, as Mathias Cronqvist:For Count Dracula from the novel, gohere.(The Lord of Vampires is beloved by the night. Especially when channelingNorio Wakamoto,Nobuhiko Kazama,Joji Nakata, andNaoya Uchidaif speaking Japanese. For English, then it'sMichael Guinn,Crispin Freeman,Patrick Seitz, andGraham McTavish. For Spanish, itsCarlos Segundo)Mankind.A cesspit of hatred and lies. I know of this first-hand. Is that why you're here, troper? You have come to me because you shun the light in favor of the darkness?If so, then permit me to introduce myself. (bows) I am Dracula Vlad Ţepeş. And I do not get many visitors nowadays. I am the genuine article, not the Belmont who fancies himself as me.It seems that I am the first vampire to be given his own page.I do set the standard, after all.I was not always the Lord of Vampires. My origins were a bit...humbler.My birth name was Mathias Cronqvist. A name I haven't used in a long time. That was who I was before I shed it in favor for my current one. I was born in the year 1060, raised in an era in which for a knight, knowledge was just as valuable as gold. That was instrumental in my joining an order of knights alongside Leon Belmont, fighting for God and country.Surprised? Long before his descendants became the bane of my existence, I considered Leon as a friend. I also married my sweetheart, Elizabetha. She was a frail woman, but I was devoted to her all the same.Until God took her from me.I was away with Leon on a military expedition when it happened. Elizabetha was alive when I left. When I returned, she was a corpse. I fought wars in God's name and this was my reward?! He took away which I loved the most!No more. No more will I serve Him.I came to the conclusion that if being mortal is God's decree, then I will defy it.And let God and all His works tremble.With that, I began to plan, all the while pretending to be bedridden from grief. To gain eternal life, I recreated the Crimson Stone. All I needed to complete it was the soul of a powerful vampire.A shame that I had to use Leon and his betrothed in my scheme, but the end justified the means.I was the puppet master and I made everyone dance to my tune; Leon, Sara, Walter, even Gandolfi.It was my master stroke, if I can be so modest. I knew Leon would triumph, weakening Walter enough to allow Death to steal his soul and absorb it into the Crimson Stone.Despite everything, Leon was still my friend. I'd rather not have Sara killed before she turned, but it served my purpose. I offered Leon the chance to become a vampire, but he refused my offer.Eternity without her would be nothing but emptiness.Looking back on it now...I understand what you meant by that, Leon.Not even Death could stop Leon. When I met up with the Reaper of Souls, he had a message for me, from Leon:You have become a cursed being and I will never forgive you. This whipand my kinsmen will destroy you someday. From this day on... the Belmont Clan will hunt the night!So began the Belmont Clan's vendetta against me, one that would end with my death a little over 900 years from now.I fled Transylvania and changed my name. Mathias Cronqvist was dead. Now, and forever, I was Count Dracula Vlad Ţepeş. Over the centuries, I built my power and influence, with Castlevania as my crowning achievement and symbol of my power.Over four centuries would pass. Then, I met Lisa.I was smitten. Lisa was a healer, creating medicines to care for the sick. She had that fire, that gentle strength that Elizabetha once had. Well, that and she could pass as my first wife, reincarnated.We fell in love, and she warmed my black heart. We married and she bore me a son, Adrian Ţepeş. You know him as Alucard. (smiles fondly as he looks at a family portrait ofhimself, Lisa and a young Adrian◊) She made me...happy.(mood darkens) But once again, my love was taken from me.The Church accused my wife of witchcraft when all she did was tend to their ills. My beloved was no witch. But they burned her at the stake.When Lisa died, all that remained good within me also died. That was when my war against mankind began.But mankind had its protectors, primarily those from Leon's bloodline. I still remember their names, their faces, even now. Trevor Belmont. Christopher and his son. Simon Belmont.But what hurt the most was when my own son not only disowned me, but rebelled against me and sided with the humans! The same mindless fools that killed his mother!He would later tell me why after we had fought, that he was following Lisa's final wishes.Do not hate humans. If you cannot live with them, then at least do them no harm, for theirs is already a hard lot.Adrian also relayed a personal message from Lisa to me, that she would love me for eternity.Oh, Lisa. Forgive me.Adrian's revelations were not enough to stop my plans. If it wasn't a Belmont that challenged me, it was a distant relative, or an order of monster hunters. As long as man has hatred in their hearts and offer me tribute, I shall return.Adrian finally figured that out. In 1999, in what would be known as the Demon Castle War, I died my final death. By severing my link with Chaos and by extension, Castlevania, I died not as Dracula, but as Mathias Cronqvist.I would later be reincarnated as Soma Cruz, but that is another story.Along with the one whereI seemed to have started out as a Belmont myself.Aside from the standard fare of action games, I alsohave a fighting gameunder my belt. It also has made the fighters here wary of my intentions.the son of Spardacould be considered a threat should he comes after me. Better keep an eye on him for the time being. I was also invited bythe entity known as Dharkon to wage war against his antithesis, Galeem. In addition to being the end boss to both Belmonts in their Classic routes, I was the final bossto some strange yellow spherical creature that eats "ghosts"anda human plumberthathunts them. I am also the midboss to theso-called "One-Winged Angel"in his path to being "The Undisputed". I admit he was a formidable opponent and I had to yield.But it is theanimated adaptationthat impresses me the most. It makes me into a more sympathetic villain, and brief as it may been, showed my relationship with Lisa. To the creators of the show, I raise my glass to you. A far better depiction of me than thatasinine mediocrity that dares passes as myself!Or that ridiculous parody Alucard fromHellsing.What is a trope? A miserable little pile of secrets! But enough talk. Have at them!Affably Evil: Even a vampire of my standing have some class, even towards my enemies. Furthermore, despite the bad blood between us, I respect my son and for a time, was devoted to both Elizabetha and Lisa.Alas, Poor Villain: When Alucard rose in rebellion and bested me, I made an appeal to Lisa for forgiveness.The Antichrist: I am merely the focus for the physical connection of the evil which dwells in mankind.Archnemesis Dad: (fumes) As much as I care for my son, Adrian justinfuriatesme for standing against me.As Long as There Is Evil: Up until the Demon Castle War, I could never truly die. So long as mankind have darkness in their hearts and their faith turns from God,I will return.As the Good Book Says...: "For what profit is it to a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul?" Matthew 16:26, I believe. I recited this verse to Adrianfollowing my defeat at his hands.Back from the Dead:Until my permanent demise in 1999.Balance Between Good and Evil:I am the counter to God on Earth.Batman Gambit:It's how Ibecame a vampirein the first place.Big Bad: For the most part. Other times, I'm relegated to being aGreater-Scope Villain.Big Bad Friend: As Mathias,I was this to Leon,manipulating him and several others in order to achieve my goal of becoming a vampire.And everyone played their parts beautifully.Boomerang Bigot: While I am guilty of the crimes I had done when I was mortal, the humans I targeted are much, much worse than I.BossLeitmotif:Dance of Illusions. So majestic, as it reflects my personality perfectly.Casanova Wannabe: I have a sharp eye for beauty. So when a woman that suits my fancy enters my home, I always give her the chance to join me by my side, to rule for eternity. They refuse, of course. Either way, none could match the caliber of Elizabetha or Lisa.Chaos ArchitectureCastlevania is a creation of Chaos. You can try and map it, but the interior always changes with each incarnation.The Chessmaster: Both as Mathias and as Dracula. As Mathias, I manipulated Leon and Walter in coming to blows, all to gain Walter's soul to fully power the Crimson Stone. As Dracula, I can rely on either Death or any of my loyal minions to revive me once every century.Depending on the Writer: Just how evil and depraved I can be? (shrugs) To be honest, it varies with each of my appearances.Determinator: You can kill me, even sic my own son after me,but I will always return and resume my war on humanity.Dimension Lord: My station as the Dark Lord is what maintains theAbyss; a realm that contains six separate hells that contain the souls of the damned, of which makes up the monsters that guard Castlevania. My home is also a dimension unto itself, being a symbol of not only my will, but the chaos found within mankind.Dracula:The most prominent examplethat is not Bram Stoker's version.Even Evil Has Loved Ones: Yes, even I can love. I remember Elizabetha and Lisa with fondness, as I had good memories with both my wives. And Adrian... he was such an inquisitive and sweet boy growing up before he turned against me. Deep down, I'm actually proud of my boy.Evil Laugh: I'm fond of this particularly when I teleport.Evil Overlord: Dark Lord, to be precise, and I set the standard for all Dark Lords after me.Evil Sounds Deep: When I was Mathias, it was more of a deep baritone. Nowadays, it's as what one would expect.Faith–Heel Turn: God took away what I loved the most in the form of my first wife.So I turned myback on Him.Final Boss: Honestly, it would be easier to count the times I'mnotthis.Foil: To Leon Belmont and his descendants. Leon lost his betrothed, yet refused to join me. The people and the Church shun them, yet they continue to defend those who fear them.Freudian Excuse:Can you really fault me for being what I am? I lost two wives due in part to mankind and their religion, the first to illness while I was away fighting the Church's enemies, and the second when she was accused of being a witch.Genre Blind: (sigh) I admit that I have placed my hopes on the Belmont clan dying out over the years., or letting the Church do that job for me. I knew I should have killed Trevor when he was a child...A Glass Of Blood: You can find me relaxing with a goblet of blood if you come storming into my throne room looking for a fight. Once I finish off my drink, I toss the goblet to the ground and rise to the challenge.Good Hair, Evil Hair: I prefer it slicked back. But I can get away with itbeing messyon occasion.Hijacked By Dracula: It happens, with the most famous example beingmy reunion with Adrian.Hoist by His Own Petard:I underestimated Leon's resolve. I should have killed him myself when he refused my offer of eternal life. Now I find out that cursed whip the Belmonts used is partially my fault that it was made.That pawn Barlowe probably had enough time to tune Dominus to be as dangerous to me as it was to the seal that kept me locked up. I should have taken him and his, to paraphrase, "stupid disciples" more seriously.Humans Are the Real Monsters: Just look what they did to my second wife! Lisa was no witch! She was a woman of medicine, who healed the sick!Hypocrite: People tend to call me out on this flaw, even more so than my son. Humans cause nothing but death and destruction... and here I am, doing exactly the same. Damn it, Adrian...Ignored Epiphany: Even after Adrian relayed Lisa's words to me... I just couldn't let go of my hatred. It would consume me completely until my final defeat.Kill It with Fire:Two techniques of which are considered to be my signature attacks:Hellfire, which is my triple fireball attack, andDark Inferno, where I fling two small meteors at the opponent. And there is my ultimate technique, theHoly Megiddo, in which I bathe the opponent in holy flames.Killed Off for Real: After nearly a millennium living as a vampire, I finally met my end at the hands of Julius Belmont during the Demon Castle War. It would not be the end, as I would be reincarnated as Soma Cruz.Large Ham: (laughs) Sometimes, it's the little things that counts. I speak with great emotion, even more so withmy Japanese avatar.Load-Bearing Boss: As Castlevania is connected to me, once I am defeated, the castle will collapse onto itself.Long-Haired Pretty Boy: See my likeness when I was Mathias Cronqvist.Manipulative Bastard: You flatter me with your praise, troper.Misanthrope Supreme:After Lisa was murdered, all bets were off.My God, What Have I Done?: Despite denying Lisa's final wish to spare mankind, it was not enough for me to stop. Lisa... I'm sorry.Not Me This Time: I don't appearwhen Juste Belmont stormed my castle, but rather, my power does, taking on my appearance of a wraith.Number of the Beast: Quite fitting, as my HP rounds out to 6,666.Our Vampires Are Different: If anything else, I am the antithesis to God.Pointy Ears: Does that bother you? Lisa thought they looked rather cute.Rage Against the Heavens: My reasoning in becoming a vampire. If limited life is God's decree, then I shall defy it. And it worked... for about 900 years.Red and Black and Evil All Over: I look good in red and black, don't I?Reincarnation Romance: I believe that Lisa was the reincarnation of my first wife. And quite possibly, Mina Hakuba being the reincarnation of the first two alongside my own reincarnation as Soma Cruz.Slouch of Villainy: Immortality can be boring. Which is why I'm usually slouched on my throne whenever a Belmont or my son shows up to challenge me.Tall, Dark, and Handsome: It was how I was able to woo both Elizabetha and Lisa in the first place.Teleport Spam: Be it in a pillar of light oras a flock of bats.I follow throughwith either Inferno or Hellfire.This Cannot Be!: Many a time when beaten in battle.True Final Boss: In some games, I am this.Vampires Are Sex Gods: Be that as it may, I am a one woman vampire. Lisa was the only onewho saw the goodness in me.Vampire Of Wealth And Taste: Why, thank you. Even a Lord of Darkness such as myself must make an impression when I grace these foolish mortals with my presence. The best example of this is my appearance inSymphony of the Night.Wicked Cultured: Something that I carried over from my days as Mathias Cronqvist. Knowledge can just be as dangerous and just as valuable in the right hands.Tragic Villain: One of the most famous in video game history.The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny:A pair of mortal men that host a series of life or death battleshad set me againsta fellow ruler that also forgone his humanity for greater power.I butchered him and feasted on his blood afterwards.There was also that one occurrence when I,the aforementioned ruler, anda small jester-like monsterserved under the command of thatcosmic entityknown asDharkon. Most of the Belmont clan and their allies had been reduced to bodiless souls by an eldritch being named Galeem, but two of them survived, those two beingSimonand his descendantRichter.We Can Rule Together: The first time, I offered Leon the chance to become my right-hand man. He refused. I also did the same to Adrian. He also refused.