The Liverpool Standard and General Commercial Advertiser. — Liverpool, Merseyside, England, 1855-11-13 00:00:00

174 [NovEMBER 13,1 ov,, , Nti alit vhere it becomes , ) known of one wil°ll' 'lllli, a ; h he bears a fair c ' t i i r 1 `oo strongly the ~,, .„ 'lkin hop .Butler--Seov ~ shil gue. etoo A kr li t ] FLOWERS... JD aP , , i'Vay l all countries they ''', hi i bea "t only in the bosont, ~ i t- .• al idea of erabellisl; ~' t o t The cultivation o' oat a. ,, licates a revolution jo „ . 11 iile ;, ate pleasure Nalell,4' : 10 4. , gan; it is a erejals ,‘ .ll th ;ense of the beauf . at. titre [cened. Man theo O. ttles. sof nature a soole ' °I r e i stenee ; colour, foro hie w e , irst time, ainl the'co b te ] ;peetators. Those ~ ''altld y can testify, that $ otiee leysuckle arouncl.t)i, ~, 4s b, od omen to the tir io,, ',es flowers is not c1_541 kleera te poor, or the "- Cr 4 4 1 Gc . t l .4i (lbeatit 1Y INGILBV.--Afte` I I; ~ , th well, returning fr°9'.i; eL Pa !oposed to stop at /1 ,1 , ' , t % l , tar gilby, and having 3:1? ' 4 , a)ia Sir IVilliam's, be:, ,;(11:lat Raving sent ia Ilitlidie '4O i t 'eal was assured b 5 , .. i0 at; )e admitted there; tyl ~3 ti lefend herself 011',A, 4 1 1 1 01 , e officer, an hisi ' tak e Y: [y of waking al3,:eA ,with I would be to adolot.,' , 'on er ' persuasion, the Ai' , t o ' and, received Opi ,1,8 a' i g a e:rfhllwvedboroe sr eu held i d : I P , , . „ii i stb s hie i tt i ea r s: : $ P e t ew : h t a t 0 ) ,se ,reds 47; t o I t d i ) e he c e n , .i e i Le morOg' eaceablel, , t ...: ehaved morn, gibe. he 511 ' 9w • h c 've een other the , -40 1 , e." o f the feti' et I the last Year vq.,w,,, ird Hoyden,. 0 , the 5 , Tavy, and Burin" Ilbriebt A the p 41 La employe. that be , 4 3c t 3culatinos ill, l lie gal i 1, .... , h t defaulter . 4. -; t odece: c t , to rliament to 0400,, ~,44, nd his debt 1 3 ,;5 0 0 i ~ breit_t, I if of it frai l 7 tr b e e?p, . psi •In support t'' "a k Id, " That out of ~ 41 iti f , l ak particular io e° ll o 4' l lo r, t,/ 1Y John Ilampaell.,,,t' a ,(Ik,'". eous stand agfilet fitsekte 141 noney, and fen , pop= do s t o r liberty, V scr,ssl,,Pl 4 a ' o, relations. Pr el 4t,t(lt, iPpen, the leaderopotkY ti ~ ' e , ' That be sc ° r batY eke great-grandfalei si ,',/tr .0 lth,t, at-grandson h 6,04 (1 ' tie, a I pie saved the 1 0 q l ` ll 'o ended to raist,idePret'v A 0 NIONS?--SOo ll° y° rt s l ions, that the/ipti4si/ Dols or even for,e yet et,.'it N u'lir, ~;`4et) SUPPLEMENT TO THE LIVERPOOL STANDARD• A DEAF AND DUMB PERSON being asked what were his ideas of forgiveness, took a pencil and wrote---" It is the odour which flowers yield when trampled upon." " I'VE just looked in to see if you are doing well," as the cook said to the lobster, when she lifted up the saucepan lid. - - - WHAT is the height of imagination ?---Having dined at a tavern to imagine you have paid the waiter, and for him to suppose so too. A YOUNG LADY at an examination of Grammar, was asked why the noun bachelor was singular. She re plied immediately with much naïveté, " Because it is very singular they don't get married." WOMEN are the Corinthian pillars that adorn and support society ; the institutions that protect women throw a shield around children ; and where women and children are provided for, man must be secure in his rights. IN the reign of George I. a pamphlet was printed, recommending a scheme for paying off the National Debt ; amongst other items was a tax of ten shillings a year on periwigs, which alone was computed to produce yealy a million of money ! A LADY at sea, full of apprehension in a gale of wind, cried out among other pretty exclamations, "We shall go to the bottom---mercy on us, how my head swims !" " Zounds, madam, never fear," said one of the sailors, " you can never go to the bottom while your head swims !" " MASTER BUGGAINS, come up and tell me who was Cleopatra ?" " Cleopatra was sister to one of the pyramids of Hegypt, and come to her unhappy hend by swallerin of a wasp," " Good boy, good boy; you'll be a Gibbon one of these days." SEDITION.—The surest way to prevent seditions (if the times do bear it) is to take away the matter of them; for if there be fuel prepared, it is hard to tell whence the spark shall come that shall set it on fire.— Lord Bacon. A PRIVATE of the Galloway Rifles was recently standing sentry when an officer, noticing that he had a black eye, accosted him and charged him with having been fighting. " Please sir," replied the soldier, "it was for that you engaged me." THE MOMENTOUS QUESTION.—Wife-beating appears to be an amusement which has reached to such a fear ful extent, that we should advise young ladies, when the question is popped, to put the preliminary inter rogative to these would-be husbands of " Do you bruise your wife ?" A SPORTSMAN of the Munchausen school, boasting that he had shot 999 pigeons at one shot, was advised to add one when he next told the story, for the sake of even numbers. " What !" exclaimed he, in great dudgeon, " do you think, then, I would tell a lie for the sake of a pigeon ?" THE late George Lamb being congratulated by a friend upon his recent election for Westminster, ob served that it was scarcely a subject of congratulation, as the necessity for his attendance at the house might force him to quit the bar. " I don't apprehend that," replied his friend ; " what is to prevent your being both house-Lamb and bar-Lamb ?" I%in. BIITTERWORTH gave evidence in a recent law case, and Serjeant Buzfuz wished to shake Butter worth's credit. So, cross-examining another witness, he asked him " What is Butter worth ?" " Thirteen pence a pound," was the answer, although I have paid as much as —" A roar of laughter extinguished Serjeant Buzfuz. SECOND NATURE.—Physical force, moral force, and the police force are all very powerful things ; and so is the force of habit. It killed a young gentleman, last month, at Bunbury Academy. He was the only boy left at school in the holidays, and the very first walk he took he split himself, poor fellow, in trying to walk two and two.—American paper. SIR THOMAS LAWRENCE was accused in company of paying attentions to ladies without meaning anything, and a gentleman present said some very hard things of the male coquette. A lady, however, defended him, saying " she really believed the majority of women would rather be courted and jilted, than not courted at all." HEALTH,---Health is the soul that animates all the pleasures of lif,e ; and without it a man starves at the best of tables-4$ poor and wretoh9d an the midst of the greatest treasures. Without health, youth loses all its vigour, beauty all its charms ; music is grating to the ears ; conversation disagreeable ; palaces are prisons, riches useless, honours and attendants cumber some, and crowns themselves a burthen. Do AS YOU PRo3iisE.---There is no necessity for breaking your word. In the first place, never pro mise anything, unless you know it to be in your power to fulfil : and in the second place, make up your mind, before you promise, that whatever you do promise you will fulfil. By so doing, you will gain and enjoy the confidence of those around you. When such a character is established, it will be of more value than ermine, gold, or princely diadem. THE HoN. NYRUM REYNOLDS, of Wyoming county, one of the American barristers of a former generation was one day accused in court of bad penmanship and worse spelling. " Gen'l'men o' the jury," said he, " learned counsel on the other side finds fault with my writin' and spellin', as though the merits of the case depended upon such matters ! I'm agin luggin' in any sich outside affairs, but I will say that a man must be a peat fool who can't spell a word more than one way. The jury sympathised with Reynolds, and rendered a decision in favour of his client. TORIES, WHIGS, AND RADICALS.—"He said he could tell a man's politics by his shirt. ' A Tory, sir,' said he, for he was a pompous old boy was old Blue-Nose ; ' a Tory, sir,' said he, ' is a gentleman, every inch of him, stock, lock, and barrel ; and he puts on a clean frill shirt every day. A Whig, sir,' said he, 'is a gentleman, every other inch of him, and he puts an unfrilled one on every other day. A Radical, sir, ain't no gentleman at all, and he only puts on one of a Sun day. But a Chartist, sir, is a loafer ; he never puts one on till the old one won't hold together no longer, and drops off in pieces.—Sam Slick in England. RUBINI having been informed that his statue in white marble was about to be executed as an orna ment to the forum of his native town, he, with his habitual insouciance, and little touched with the honour intended him, demanded how much it would cost. On being answered that the expense would be 1,2001., he said, " Well, then, let them give me the money, and when the day intended for the inaugura tion arrives, I will place myself in propria persona on the pedestal, so that the town will enjoy the original instead of a copy, and I shall be 1,200 f. the richer." THE BEEFSTEAK CLUB.---The well-known Cobb (the late Secretary at the India-house) was, on one occasion, vice-president of this club, and filled the chair opposite to Alderman —, who, as president, sat at the head of the table. The member in the president's chair was, by inveterate usage, the subject for universal attack ; puns, jokes, and repartees were levelled at him in unmerciful abundance, and on this occasion the vice-president Cobb' led him a sad life. At last the Alderman exclaimed, " Would to heaven I had another vice-president. Oh ! that I had a gentle man opposite me." " Why should you wish any such thing," said Cobb, " you cannot be more opposite to a gentleman than you are at present." HAIR DRESSING A LA RACHEL.—The New York hair-dressers have just introduced a new style of dressing hair under the above title. It is thus described :—" The back hair is plaited in the wide Circassian braid, and arranged so as to form a star ; a Grecian braid, through which pearls are interwoven, is brought round, forming a border or trimming to the wider braid, and in the centre a diamond star shines forth from a contrasting background of black velvet. Between each of the four points of the star are placed bunches of small flowers, violets, myrtle blossoms, or rosebuds, with pendant sprays falling on each side of the neck; the two upper clusters-meet the front, which is looped up in two thick curls, brought down rather long on the face." GOLDEN APHORISMS.---" The slanders, perchance, may be not altogether forged or untrue ; they may be the implements, not the invention of malice. But they do not, on this account, escape the guilt of detraction. It is not expressible how deep . a wound a tongue sharpened to this work will give, with no noise and a very little word."---Coleridge's A i ds to Reflec tion. " When you say somewhat good of a man, which he does not deserve, there is no wrong done to him in particular. Whereas, when you say evil of a man which he does not deserve, there is a di rec t, formal, serious injury ; a real act of injustice done to him. Even in a case Nirl let the true character be to be a bad man, thong' no words can express to( should be used."---Bish( Government of the Tong WO3IEN'S - LOVE OF . women love flowers, i n gays of them ; but it is that they conceive the dwellings with them.. among the peasantry in . dl feelings. It is a delica, way through coarse orga , eyes are opened : it is a see of the soul which is awake that there is in the gifts than is necessary for exist are perceived for the fin objects have at least sp travelled in the country under the window, a hon( cottage, are always a goof The hand which cultivate: the supplications of the stranger. CROMWELL AND LID' of Marston Moor, Cromv suit of the Royalists, pm, seat of Sir William Ingill his troop a relation of Si announce his arrival. Ha` obtained an audience, he no such person should b had force sufficient to dt against all rebels. The sented the extreme folly and that the safest way w , peaceably. After much 7 advice of her kinsman, a gate of the lodge with a apron-string, and having neither he nor his soldit led the way to the hall jealous of his intentions ; At his departure in the " It was well he had be, ner ; for that had it bee have left that house alive. OLD TORY I George the First, Richar' been Treasurer to the NI the South Sea mania, had in aid of his private spe( which he had become 295,000, petitioned par , allowing him to compoum having already paid half and reversionary estates. Mr. Arthur Onslow said ; ancient family, and in p: his great-grandfather (J , most noble and couragei power, in opposing shipmE in the glorious cause of something done for his Whig sophistry, Mr. Shi] opposition, wittily said, upon the merits of the gr , was sure of, that his grea' sh,lpinoney than ever h( King Charles I. ever inter WHAT ARE YOUR OPIN people to their own notiL any persons for friends, or eves- j a y V,' not entertain similar views. Th, e . 00 4 made a point of strictly cross-que.s. d n i fay tit' tics as to their religious and politle,'; Irr. 4 ! engoged them. While residing on n e50 11,1 groom presented himself to be hired , I co d ani hand not to compromise himself 0 4 , , 5 1 0 replies. " What are your opinions f orilslo,rooo, first demand. " Indeed, then, Yo u l * 0%4 9 I have just none at all at all." " ° boa you must have some, and I insist ul ) °, ll p v o fe „ " Why, then, you r h onour ' s glory, 1 . 1 7:" to t' world just the same as yo ur Lordship s an d can have no objection to state theta:, trs frankly what is your way of thinlang' i 4 it my way of thinking you mane bY, o f 0' Why, then, I am exactly the sainC sv3) I b kati Akt, 4 144 bu 444 til e ket i tray, I) , ti,