The Press. — London, England, 1855-06-30 00:00:00

JUNE 30, 1855. can be no doubt that it emanated from the petty tradesmen and labouring classes themselves, and that its practical object is to secure to those classes a cessation of labour upon Sundays. MISS NIGHTINGALE ig on her way to England, and Miss STANLEY, it is stated, has already returned. We hope that their mission, though perhaps not encouraging to the principls of amateur attendance, may !have the effect of establishing in military hospitals a regular corps of experienced and professional female nurses. THE SOLEMN STATESMAN. I wonder that the Honourable Member for Aylesbury does not blush with shame when he brings such an accusation (of levity) against me.—Lord Palmerston. Oh wad kind Heaven the giftie gie us To see coarsens as others see us.—Burns. My faults I've undoubtedly had In a life of unwonted longevity, But, 'pon honour, 'tis really too had To accuse me of " scandalous levity." Ri fol de rol tol de rol, &o. The Reverend Mr. John Bright (Roars of laughter) but lately pitched into me For being too giddy and light, Bringing home my " original sin" to me. Ri fol de rol tol de rol, &c. I didn't much marvel at that, For we all know friend Broadbrim's pugnacity ; And a man who won't take off his hat Would be guilty of any audacity. Ri fol de rol tol de rol, dm But when Layard obligingly acts With his very choice hand of performers, Let him stick if he can to his facts, Though they're things much eschewed by Reformers. Ri fol de rol tol de rol, &c. He says I'm too fond of a jest, That I'm full of my " quips and my quiddities," And that those who once loved me the best Have grown sick of my comic vapidities. Ri fol de rol tol de rol, &c. I'm sure you'll agree this is fudge, Mere bosh I may say (great hilarity), For you know I'm as grave as a Judge— Judge Maule—pray excuse jocularity. Ri fol de rol tol de rol, &c. REFORM YOUR PARLIAMENTARY DAYS. Ma. DICKENS is the only orator of the Administrative Reformers who has made any suggestion for carrying out the views of the Society. It is the duty of the Premier, he says, to find a day for every member of the House of Commons who has a motion to make. Now, as there are 658 members of the House. and only 365 days in the year, without reckoning Sundays, holidays, vacations, and recesses, it does not clearly appear how Mr. DICKENS'S object is to be attained without an alteration of the calendar. A clever Pope, when petitioned by some simple rustics to give them two harvests in the year, replied " Willingly, but into the year I must put twenty four months. What would our Legislators think of a Parliamentary Session two or three years long, that the Premier might fulfil Mr. DICKENS'S notion of his duty to find a day for every member who desires one? THE PREMIER'S MASSACRE SPEECH. ( Specially Reported). LORD PALMERSTON : Sir, it may now be as well—not that it much matters, perhaps, for very few things do matter—but the House of Commons may like me to proceed to that little annual sacrificial cere. mony—(a laugh)—facetiously termed the Massacre of the Innocents. (Laughter.) But here, Sir, a difficulty occurs at the very outset. lam " willing to wound," and by no means " afraid to strike "—(a laugh)— but the fact is, that there is a plentiful lack of victims. What is there for me to massacre ? There are a great many private bills before the House, but modesty is my specialty—(Hear, hear)—and I should not presume to dictate to the authors what should be done with these. As for Government bills, Sir, the list is remarkably brief. Of course, 1 take no blame to Government for not having brought it more bills, because we did not take office for the purpose of bringing in bills, but for the purpose of taking Sebastopol. An Hon. Member : Have you taken it? (Hear, hear). Lord PALMERSTON : That, Sir, is not the question ; and I do most earnestly implore hon. members to lay aside all levity, which is most *estimable, and to address themselves only to the business before 617 the House. I say, Sir, we did not take office as legislators, and I may remark that the Government ought to be regarded in a military, and not a civil way. (Laughter.) And, talking of what is civil, I am reminded of civilians, and this naturally brings mo to Doctors' Commons. The House will not have forgotten the virtuous fury of my honourable and learned friend the Solicitor-General against the Ecclesiastical Courts, and how he solemnly devoted himself to their extermination, root and branch, from the leanest surrogate to the fattest touter. (Roars of laughter.) I fear my honourable and learned friend must restrain his slaughtering hand for another yea►-the Testamentary Bill we abandon. Then, Sir, we certainly did talk about reforming the Corporation of London. Well, Sir, I think that such reform will be a very good thing to talk about again next year. Besides, at that time there will be a Jewish Lord Mayor, and I think that to initiate such reform at such an interesting crisis will be to create an era in the history of civil and religious liberty. (Cheers from Lord John Russell.) Therefore, Sir, the Corporation shall not perish by Moon-light—(laughter)—but shall abide the judgment of Salomons. (Applause.) I have been asked, Sir, whtther we intend to reform the Court of Chancery in Ireland. My answer to that is very short. Sir, we don't. (Laughter.) Well, Sir, there are some other bills which may just as well stand over until next year, for there are differencesiof opinion about them, and everybody knows that it is impossible to pass a bill unless the House of Commons is unanimous in approving it. One of these is about the Court of Session in Scotland. I don't pretend to know what it means, or what the special Court to which it refers may be ; but if it is a Court of Session, I suppose one session will do as well for it as another. (Laughter., Then there is an Irish bill called the Grand Jurors Cess Bill. This I should have liked to pass, because it is a bill for removing nuisances, as cesspools and tho like, on the presentment of the Grand Jury—eh? (Sir B. Hall whis pered his Lordship.) Oh! ah ! I see. I was in error as to the nature of this bill—it's another kind of thing—l believe for the aboli tion of a grand jury, or something of that sort, very desirable, and I hope to see the same thing done in England, but there is no immediate hurry on the subject. We now come, Sir, to the bills which I think we ought to try to carry. (Hear, hear.) First, Sir, there is the Limited Liability Bill. This is a measure designed for the benefit of the humbler classes—for making partnerships—that is to say, abolish ing partnerships—l mean for making companies, everybody to be liable—or rather—l believe, however, that 1 need not go into any detailed explanation of the principle of the bill ; but when I say that it is eminently calculated to promote the benefit of the humbler classes, and am sure that the House will lend us every assistance in trying to understand it—l mean to pass it. Then, Sir, we approach the nuisances, and I hope that the House will hold its Noes—(roars of laughter)—withhold them, I should say, for our bill, my friend Sir Benjamin's rather, is a very good one, and we must endeavour to carry it, as also his Local Management Bill, which must be a good one, for the Bumbles abuse it. (Hear, hear.) I hope, Sir, that the metropoli tan members will not say that we do not legislate for London—two out of the four important bills we shall pass being for the metropolis, while Ireland and Scotland are thrown over. (Hear.) But, Sir, I said that we were not a civil Government. Mr. LINDSAY : Hear, hear. Lord PALMERSTON : Ah ! Charley Wood was down upon you, was he ? (Roars of laughter.) Then you shouldn't throw stones. (Cheers.) Well, Sir, I said we were a military Government, pledged to the vigorous prosecution of the war abroad, and to all sorts of Adminis trative Reforms at home. Those were the terms on which we came into office Of the mode in which we have prosecuted the war, I need say nothing. (Laughter.) Once, in a speech I made about slavery, I said that a certain resolution of this House would act like a " potent spell" upon the enemies of liberty. The Times, in its irreverent jocularity, contrived to misprint my words, and made me say a " patent shell." But now, Sir, I may accept the misreading and say that the resolution of the House which decided that we should suty in office did act like a patent shell upon our enemies ; and in the very desperation of fury with which they defended the Malakoff and the Redan I see proof of the terror to which the firm attitude of her Majesty's Government has reduced them. ( Hear, hear.) Had they unluckily gained a victory over us, I should regard it only as another proof of the wisdom of the House, which, in continuing the Govern ment in our hands, drives the enemy to the frenzy of despair. Look ing at matters in this light, Sir, I think that the House ought to be well satisfied with what we have done, but I will add that as soon as Sebastopol is taken, nothing will give me greater pleasure than to mention it. (Laughter.) Then, Sir, as to Reforms at home, here is our Ordnance Bill, which I maintain, whatever may he said to the contrary, does everything that is necessary, and to all the stricture of the Times I reply with the Ordnance motto, Sua tela Tonenti. (Applause.) Thus, Sir, I have massacred my innocents—(laughter)— and if, as the young lady said of her illegal baby, they are " very little ones," never mind that. Some things are not the worse for being little. C' Hear, hear," from the Colonial Secretary.) It will be may duty to ask the House to get over the public business as soon as possible, and break up, for it is the opinion of myself, and of the select body of gentlemen with whom I act, that the more a Govern ment can manage to do without troubling the House of Commons, the better ; and lam far from sure—l hope it is not imprudent in me to say so—that if the House were not summoned at all until this time in 1857 (except for a week to vote the taxes), things would go on a great deal better than they do at present. However, not to press that point just now, and having completed my massacre, I beg to resign my character of King Herod, and to relapse into my favorite part (as kindly mentioned by Mr. Charles Dickens) of the " Comic old gentleman" of this establishment. (Laughter and awes) THE PRESS.