The Press. — London, England, 1856-01-12 00:00:00

ANIJARY 12, 1856. OUR FLEET IN THE BALTIC. He should have a stout heart who would drive an engine or fish for whales; but weak, in deed, must be the nerves of that wan who would fear the prospect of a modern Baltic cam paigu.—Times of last week. Ay, stout should be his heart, And strong us steel his frame, Who lonely sits apart, Blinded with wind and flame, To guide the mighty engine on its path; Calm 'mid the sultry heat, Laughing at snow and sleet, And when the lightnings fleet Flash in wrath. And brave as were of old Our seamen staunch and true, Who scorned to dig for gold In the dark mines of Peru, But found their wealth in galleons of Spain, Should the sturdy fishers be Who sail the Northern Sea When the storm-winds are let free On the main. But admirals who seek A pleasant Baltic cruise Ye may be soft and meek, And men of cautious views, With an unaffected hate of ba la of lead. For 'mould really vex a saint How tbey knock away the paint And spoil the carvings quaint On figurehead. Ye sailors who're inspired With the ancient love of fame, Whose generous souls ate fired With wrath at England's shame, And rage to see her glorious laurels droop, Be ye captains or young mates, Cursing your cruel fates, In frigates or first-rates, Deck or poop, Thus shut out from renown, How bitter ye must feel As ye wander through the town Of Stockholm or of Kiel, And the Danes and Swedes with wonder all unfeigned Learn that there's nothing done, No battle fought and won— Nay, that to fire a gun You've abstained ! Oh, sailors of the fleet, For you m) heart is sore That tile foe ye may not meet, Nor face the cannon's roar From his batteries, as Nelson faced of old. For you my eyes are wet, But I trust that even yet A leader ye may get Staunch and bold, Who'll bravely sail his ships Where honour ye may gain, Nor make mere summer trips Upon the Northern main, Disgracing England's flag before the world. Once more upon the sea Laurelled with victory May that proud standard be Soon unfurled ! MINISTERIAL CHRISTMAS TREE. [From the Morning Past.] TAE Premier, with his usual hospitality, concluded the Christmas recess by giving a large party, nominally juvenile, but to which a great nun her of his old and new friends were invited, and at which his col leagues were also present. The greatest hilarity prevailed, and when, in the course of the evening, an apartment was thrown open in which a magnificent Christmas Tree, profusely decorated with prizes, was dis covered, the brilliant and distinguished assemblage broke into actual cheering. The company eagerly proceeded to draw their numbers and some curious coincidences marked the allotment of the gifts Lord Clarendon drew a cigar, in chocolate, and expressed much pretended regret that it was only an imitation, a remark which elicited a general opinion from the party that the noble Foreign Secretary ought to be put into the schedule of the Smokey Chimneys Act. Sir Charles Wood drew a little frigate, which he immediately pro ceeded to sail in a globe of gold fishes, and great amusement was caused by its being dkcovered that the First I. ord of the Admiralty was sailing his vessel stern foremost, and still more by his persisting that it was all right. Lord Panmure drew a tiny edition of the " Book of Etiquette," and open ql it at the passage—" A man who wears his hat vulgarly is a vulg,u•ian." His lordship said that this was very true, and could not understand why the others laughed. Lord Granville drew a Cupid. Mr. Labouchere drew a bon-bon, representing a very long tongue. Mr. Hayter drew a little pitcher, which Mr. 'Vernon Smith advised it'll not to take too often to the 'Vella; but this attempt at sarcasm was awfully castigated by the whipper-in, who said that " a little pitcher" reminded him of Mr. Smith—because it had " long ears." Sir George Grey drew a figure of the Ratcatcher's Daughter, and went into a violent rage, at the shortest notice, at having a profane and vulgar subject intruded upon him, and he went up stairs and angrily read a hymn-book until supper-time. Mr. James Wilson drew a hat in sugar, and learnedly pointed out its imperfections of shape and make. He also explained the new pro cess for making artificial Beaver, which the Premier ridiculed, de claring he wouldn't wear a beaver that had never been worth a darn. Lord Cranworth drew a seal, pocketed, and forgot it, and was terri fied out of his senses by a little girl coming up to him with, " Lord Palmerston's compliments, and he must give up the Seal." Recol lecting himself, the Chancellor was greatly relieved, kissed the young lady, and surrendered the prize. The Duke of Argyll drew a little decanter, which gave him the opportunity of delivering a lecture on the virtues generally, and espe cially temperance, and of defending himself for having laid down a law that any of his tenants should be rejected who drank wine or spirits— unless they paid more than 301 a year lent. Admiral Napier drew a spelling book, which he gave to one of the children, declaring that as for himself he was like "Tom" in the "trim-built wherry," and " never more would take a Spell." Admiral Berkeley drew a figure of an old donkey in a passion. Mr. Vernon Smith, having recovered from Mr. Hayter, drew a packet of powder warranted to clean white gloves without smell. Being allowed another chance, he drew a bottle of Banduline. Lord Palmerston drew a baby, and was overwhelmed with ques tions whether that was one of the babies who, as he had declared, were born without original sin. We regret to state that his reply must re main unpublished, out it made the ladies turn away, laughing. The Chancellor of the Exchequer drew an egg, and expressed much pleasure, for it had, ho said, given him an idea. It is, therefore, supposed that in the next Budget, which is to be " very simple," he contemplates a direct tax upon daily necessaries, a " popular" way, assuredly, of avoiding an addition to the income tax. Sir John Villiers Shelley did his best to draw a chair, but a small sac hung next, and somehow Sir John missed the chair and got the sack. " Slow, but nut Sewer," said time Premier. THE PRESS. NEXT AFTERWARDS. A SECOND edition of Mr. Cobden's pamphlet being at press, the future Foreign Secretary has taken the opportunity to append a few more last, or rather " next," words. We have been favored with an early proof of his poatcriptum " When Europe has been pacified upon this patent principle of allowing every Power quietly to obtain everything for which it may ask with a sword in its hand, I intend to vacate the Foreign-office; where, in fact, there will be little to do except to endorse the rescripts and requisitions which may arrive from St. Petersburg, Vienna, Wash ington, or other capitals. My eminent talents must, however, not be hid under the bushel of privacy, and I will consent. therefore, to accept the seals of the Home Department. In this post I shall improve the opportunity of securing peace and order at hove upon the same system and with the same success as I have already attained abroad. "1. I shall begin by dismissing the causes of crime and dis; turbance entirely from my attention, accepting, at the same time, the objects and antecedents of the pre-existing Government. "2. I shall then seek above all things to withdraw every blue policeman from Rag-fair, Houndsditch, Jacob's Island, Clare-market, the National Hall in John -street, the Reform Club, and all other centres of turbulence or treason ; and either concentrate the force around Whitehall, or else abolish it altogether. At present the Bobbies may be brought away without further loss or discredit ; it may not always be so. "3. Negotiations will be opened with the general community of burglars, footpads, pickpockets, and fences, throughout the country, with the view of concluding a treaty upon terms of amicable reciprocity. Why should we seek to do one another the greatest possible harm ? Why should we mutually force each other to maintain cumbrous and exhaustive armaments—expend ing our incomes, or even incurring a load of debts, for the purchase of bludgeons, pistols, and gunpowder? And why, finally, should the innocent and tax-paying citizens, when they happen to be robbed, be also murdered or maimed? 1 trust to put these questions in their true light before all parties, and to obtain their common consent to a treaty which, not, to incur the charge of vagueness, I would denominate one of unarmed neutrality.' " 4. I shall propose, accordingly, that all the chevaliers of the dark lanthern and black doll, should promise to fulfil their missions with the utmost gentleness and civility, never using or, except in cases of absolute necessity, showing any deadly weapons. On our side we undertake that no emissaries from the Home-office shall disturb them in the exercise of their avocations. " Finally, I would not risk the knuckles of a single Peeler, or spend a shilling of the county-rate for the chance of a ' barren triumph' in arresting and convicting a felon who, after conviction, must only become an additional source of embarrassment and expense. Foregoing any such Quixotic mission,' I would pursue a policy more consistent with the interest of the people—honest or otherwise—whose welfare I was charged to promote. I, also, would not seek to hind any of the parties to the treaty by parchment promises' for its observance ; since even if they could write (which is doubtful) their pledges would not be worth the ink with which they were written. The stability of the compact must, ►l• - ,refore, rest solely and securely on the mutuality of interests—and tne country may be assured of its pertnanenee, at all events, so long as the administration of the Home Department remains in the hands of " Jan. 11, 1856." " R. C:'