The Press. — London, England, 1854-11-04 00:00:00

~.- -. •1••••••.•Ipm••••••• NOVEMBER 4, 1854. THE P THE PAINTER'S INTERVIEW . " Sir Charles L. Eastlake had an interview with Lord Aberdeen yesterday at his °facial resi dence in Downing-street."—Morning Chronicle, Nov. 1, 1854. The P.R.A. is apparently posed — He cannot paint from the sketch as proposed, But wishes to make a fitter; So, turning the key in his studio door, And leaving his canvass and paints on the floor, He is off to confer with his sitter. " If I paint your Lordship the usual way, As a common Scotchman of every day, Like, for example, Old Robin Gray, The public," says he, " may be apt to say The portrait is true, but bucolic ; It looks for, in persons of your degree, Especially when they sit to me, A treatment refined and symbolic. " I must have some type of your public life — Of your Lordship's aversion to war and strife— A feather-bed or a fleece, — Or a dove, or a lamb with a silken band, Or perhaps an olive-branch in your hand — A something by which folks may understand You're the Minister of Peace. " On a table beside you I wish to display A bust of Minerva, and, by the way, Your Treaty of Adrianople; Or, if you prefer it, the Vienna Note, Or the Memorandum which somebody wrote As the ' key ' to Constantinople. " At the same time, I freely presume to observe, If your Lordship wants an emblem of nerve, It's done in a few easy dashes ; Through an open window or door at your back I can give a view in crimson and black Of Sebastopol in ashes. " The bursting of rockets or shells to combine With the flames of a magazine or mine I can manage well with a now carmine Of which I've a specimen bladder ; As yet it's exclusively used as a shade In the Russian cotton export trade By Bright and Co." * * The Premier made A spring as if stung by an adder. * * * Sir Charles heard a sound half growl and half groan, The door slammed hard,—and he was alone. THE GORDON S. The Gordons hae the guiding o't, The Gordons hae the guiding o't ; And while 'tis so the sounds of woe Will be the only tidings o't. The Gordons hae the guiding o't, The Gordons hae the guiding o't; If war maun be across the sea, 111WIIMIMOVW; Why then there's nae avoiding o't. The Gordons hae the guiding o't, The Gordons hae the guiding o't ; So Charlie ye maun needs come hame, There's nae use !anger hiding o't. The Gordons hae the guiding o't, The Gordons hae the guiding o't ; But if there's shame on Britain's name, We ken wha'll hae the biding o't. JOCK O'Scor, THE FALSE REPORT. (Vide W. 31. Praed's lines on the rumoured resignation of Lord Palmerston in 1831.) "Ws must condole with the PRESS. Lord Aberdeen has not resigned."—Mtnisterial Journal. There's no foundation for the news, Whate'er the sanguine PRESS may say; England has honour yet to lose, And memories yet to cast away. Dead are her laurels, dim her fame, But destiny has yet behind A darker doom, a fouler shame — Lord Aberdeen has not resigned . The scornful look and angry tone Are vain in these degenerate days ; Resigned ! oh, no! high hearts alone Can rightly value blame or praise. A nation's sneer, a nation's frown, Might awe, might fire, a noble mind ; Pitt would have flung his office down— Lord Aberdeen has not resigned. RESS. 1045 NAVAL AND MILITARY PREPARATIONS. Tux greatest activity now prevails in the public departments, and her Majesty's Ministers are continually occupied in providing means, fur the prosecution of the war. The Duke of Newcastle has consented to receive instructions as to his official duties from the reporting staff of the Times. He is directing his attention specially to the recent improvements in gunnery, upon which he has the advantage of consulting with an intelligent compositor. Mr. Gladstone has had an important correspondence with the Lady Superior of the New Order of Reintegrated Magdalene. Some of the sisterhood will at once proceed to Scutari. They will take with them a collection of tracts and ecclesiastical toys, with several hogsheads of holy water. The latter will be entered as " chloride of lime," to protect it from the prejudices of the longshore-men who voted for Lord John Russell. The hospital cases will be put under the care of distressed needlewomen, who have been re-exported from the Antipodes out of compliment to Mr. Sidney Herbert. They will bo expected to take charge of the spoons and table linen in the event of the occupation of the palace of Prince Woronzow. A trial has been made of a new stimulating cordial prepared by the successor of M. Soyer at the Reform Club. It is supposed to have peculiar efficacy in cases of sea sickness, and Sir James Graham has given orders that a supply should be immediately sent to Admirals Napier and Dundas To prevent the escape of its effervescing qualities it will be hermetically sealed and packed in chaff, the packing to be superintended by Mr. Bernal Osborne. The bottles will bo labelled separately with the motto " Bravo, Charley !" To protect our sailors from undue exposure in the Black Sea a warm winter's jacket has been devised under the superintendence of the Premier. It is called the " Gordon check ; " and, independently of the texture of which it is fabricated, its novelty consists in the sleeves being firmly attached to the body so as to preclude the possi bility of undue muscular exertion. Its merits are said to have been tested by Admiral Dundas ; but as yet its general adoption has been prevented by the prejudices of Sir Edmund Lyons and other sailors of the old school. To beguile the tediousness of prolonged inaction it is further ordered that the sailors be regularly exercised at chess, draughts, dominoes, loto, and long whist. In a spirit of con siderate attention each of our soldiers is to be furnished with a copy of Dr. Watt's Hymns. The most beneficial effects are anticipated from the mental distraction they will produce. As the soldiers are heard chanting around their camp fires, " Let dcgs delight to bark and bite," &c., it is hoped that the gunners of Sebastopol may be touched with contrition, and draw their charges of grape and canister. At all events, familiarity with these humanising strains will serve as a pre paration for the coming peace, to the hope of which, as the Premier told the Bailie of Aberdeen, he has always clung "with desperate tenacity." Should the war appear likely to be protracted beyond the present quarter, it is said that Mr. Gladstone will modify the peace budget he was about to bring forward on the meeting of Parliament, and that he will impose an excise duty of ten shillings per quarter upon home-grown wheat. In the event of the war continuing through the winter, Mr. Robert Lowe will be despatched to the North Cape, where ho will exercise his peculiar faculties of vision during the continuance of the Arctic night in observing the Russian movements in the port of Archangel. In order to intercept the Russian reinforcements intended for the Crimea Sir Charles Wood is occupied with a plan for fortifying the Isthmus of Suez. In the event of any unforeseen disaster Lord John Russell holds himself ready to take the command of our combined naval and military forces. In this event his fourth Reform Bill will be consigned to the joint care of Lord Palmerston and Sir Benjamin ANOTHER IRISH DIFFICULTY. JAXES . B PARK.—Lord J— R-11, who has been taking a strictly eonstitn tional walk, encounters Lord P n. Lord P.: Ah! R — —1 ! How are you? Capital weather fur walking exercise, isn't it? But I wish they would not let those snobs smoke in the parks—it spoils the atmosphere. Lord J.: Add a clause preventing it to your smoke bill next ses sion. We'll all support you, and Clarendon shall be told that he must submit. Lord P.: The process won't be new to him. Lord J.: Not exactly. By the way, how you went on about babies at Romsey, saying that they were all born good, and so forth. Lord P. (laughiny): Well, wasn't it the thing to say? Lord J.: A zoological blunder and a theological heresy. But never mind—the mothers liked it, and you are " always proud of the approbation of the female part of the nation," you know. Lord P.: That depends—and, apropos of that, how's Abby ? Lord J. (testily): How should I know? I say—l am very glad to have met you—walkup and down for five minutes. This is a nice affair in Ireland. isn't it? Lord P. : I never read the foreign news now. What is it? Lord J.: No, be serious a minute. I mean that Lucas affair. Lord P.: Frankly, I have not read it. You know my estimate of such animalcule. When they are to be scrunched Ido my best, but NUMNII•mmINIIIPamr 7 I