The Press. — London, England, 1857-02-28 00:00:00

FEBRUARY 28, 1857. PRIVATE M'GRATH TO MR. F. PEEL. I've gat commeession frae our men To spak their minds oot, Sir, yell ken ; I've cut a braw point to my pen, Will gar ye feel ; Syne aff gaes Stumpie at ye, then, Douce Mister Peel. It's bizzed aboot, the ither day Whan ane stude i the Hoose to say 'Twas unco little, 'twas, the way Sojers' wives fared, Au' gin they pinch for want o' pay Naebody cared. It's bizzed aboot, that up ye rose, Curlit' 3 our deeplomatic nose, An' said, " Wi' siccon folk as those What need to marry ? Their term's but ten year, till its close E'en let them tarry !" Noo, Sir, I dinna mean to fa' ye Wi the kind names the sojers ca' ye ; They're nae sae nice to say afore ye, Tho' true in season. Lend me your lug—l daur assure ye Plain talk's uae treason. 'Tis we ficht battles wi' your foes, 'Tis we fzet a' the bangs and blows ; An' while ye gab, the Army goes To back your speeches. Gude sakes ! you Talkers wadna choose We Doers' breeches! Wall, Sir, an' whan we've tint eneugh By cauld, green coffee, and sic stuff, They that hae wives maun see 'em rough Life out wi tears ; T'ithers maun wait, till tender's tough, A wee ten years. " Increase and multiply," that's said To coat o' black an' coat o' red ; What gar ye shak' your silly head To think puir laddies That hae quid names to leave whan dead Wad fain be daddies ? For that command of Him adored Ane Malthus pit' that overboard ; An' ye, like him, ye think the Lord Nae politeecian, Sae gie us o' his written word A new edeetion. Ane Orpheus loo'ed in aulden time Sheep-gut, as ye love sheep-skin prime, The lassies tare him for some crime Just bane frae bane ; Gin ours, Sir, catch ye, deed next time, Yell leav' us alane ! HINTS for a SUPPLEMENT to DR. JOHNSON'S DICTIONARY. DILIGENTLY COLLECTED FROM THE LEADING ORATORS. Date : A.D. 1957. Romance: an unquestionable faCL.—PALMERSTON. [This authority was Prime Minister of England by sufferance for a short period. His opinions were hybrid. He tried to obtain a reputation for wit, but failed. After retiring from public life, he edited that celebrated classic, Josephus Molitor.] Avoidance of precipitate baste : political convenience.—WOßTLEY. [Solicitor-General under the last-named personage. The phrase was used in a discussion on the expulsion of one Sadleir—an individual whom the Government at first refused to expel, from an affectionate wish not to injure his character.] Public duty : a job.—SMITII. [The Smiths are numerous, and some of them notorious. This particular Smith was named Vernon ; the scent of his Frangi panni has descended to the present day. He governed India from England for a short time, and afterwards made an effort to become Governor-General (or Viceroy) of that empire, but was unsuccessful.] Favourable impressions : laughter which greets a buffoon.—PEEL. [Peel, the third Robert, a rising statesman in Lord Palmerston's opinion. A lecturer, who indulged in virulent personalities, for which he apologised by stating that they made a " favourable impression.' Ile never ventured out of England afterwards, for fear of being punished by some one ho had insulted.] THE PRESS. FRAGMENT OF A BALLAD, ILLUSTRATIVE OF ENGLISH HISTORY—BUT UNACCOUNTABLY OMITTED BY MR. ROBERT BELL. These fifteen gentlemen had, however, done their duty on Monday night.—Speech of Mr. T. Duncombe. It was the East Surrey champion, The blatant and bold Locke King, That vowed once more his motion. Before the House to bring. " There be fifteen plighted Radicals Sit with the Ministrie, And they have sworn through scaith and scorn To speak and vote with me." Then out and spake the " pliant "* Pam, That sate above them all : " Beshrew me for a shiftless loon If ere this thing shall fall. " Ye'll bide at home, my Osborne, Ye'll mind what's said by me ; I trow of all dumb animals There's none so tame as thee. " And mark me, stout Sir Benjamin, To night ye'rc best away ; Ye may visit your friends at the B9ard of Works, Or call upon Nicholay. " And heed me, John Fitzgerald, Ye may off and hunt Sadleir ; And Baines may go to the Duchy (Or the Sound) of Lancastere. " Though 'twas merry of old when your friends ye sold At the franchise to have a fling, Ye must leave the boroughs to Walmsley, And the counties to bold Locke King. " And what though diddled voters May vow such deeds are base ? A light, light thing's a broken pledge When it wins a goodly place." They've heard his words, the staunch fifteen, They've fled, like snows in Spring : And Pam has charged with the Tories And settled the bold Locke King. Merrily smiled that ancient Lord As he pitted his vassali' backs— " Yc've kept the County Franchis e up, Keep up the Income Tax. " For 'tics oh 'twould be a woeful thing The Tories in power to see, And a quarter-day that brought no pay In the red and the white monie. " Yell stand by me, my Radicals, My staunch fifteen and true; Ye've done your own constituents, Now do your duty too." • I haya great confidence in the pliancy of the noble lord.—ltr. 3f. Gibson. BOWRING'S MONOMANIA. Atit—" Bonnie Dundee." To Admiral Seymour 'tw•as Bowring that spoke : " In Canton there are people who opium smoke Till their thoughts are all dreams and their intellect's gone— Oh ! a capital place is the town of Canton ! Come fill up my teacup, come fill up my pipe, Let's give these Chinese a good finishing wipe. From Thames to St. Lawrence, from Danube to Don, There's never a town like the town of Canton ! " Canton is a place where they've capital tea, But they strongly object to give any to me ; But since Palinerston's war-making genius has shone Over England. I'm sure we may enter Canton. Come fill, &c. " There are towns beyond Pekin, and teas beyond price— To get into the heart of the land would be nice: But a trifle once gained, we'll be soon marching on— So Neigh for the teacup of pleasant Canton ! Come fill, &c. " Then don't let results make you feel in a funk, But seize every lorAa, and smash every junk. The Premier's the fellow to bid us go on ; We shall soon make an entry to pleasant Canton ! Como fill," Ito,