The Press. — London, England, 1853-09-03 00:00:00

THE PRESS. UNFOUNDED ALARM IN THE CABINET THERE was a time, immediately after Prince MENSCHIKOFF'S ultimatum had excited general indignation, when every despatch received at our Foreign Office was opened with eager haste and trembling uncertainty. It was a critical period. Might not some of our Ministers at Foreign Courts say too much, and, mindful of our national character, be oblivious of Cabinet fears? At that time some despatches (printed with the parliamentary papers this week) are said to have occasioned great alarm to our Foreign Secretary, as he hurriedly glanced through their contents. A certain manly spirit—a degree of vigour that always accompanies the bold expression of truth—pervaded the correspondence, which seemed ill-suited to the timid, wavering policy of the Cabinet at home. The Ambassador not only expres , ied to Lord CLARENDON his belief that, " when once a nation, like su indivi•lual, sets at nought the opinion of the whole civilised world, it is perlectly idle to hope that any ropresentations can avail ;" but, addressing the 11ini ter of the Government to whom he was accredited, ' 6 renounced all responsibility," and eoncluded " I hasten to finish this communie dims, as it is impossible to make it without & feeling of irritation." The apprehension: crewed by such a tone may be conceived. The startled Secretary communicated with his colleagues, a Council was summoned, and, at lust, there seemed a probability that the Government, c'►mmitted by the high language of its representative, would be compelled to net with vigour ; or—dreadful alternative!-Lto resign. How great, then, was the relief of its members when, the despatch being preducel, it was found that the plain, free words with which our Ministers at Foreign Courts were accustomed to meet the artifices of deceitful intrigue were addressed, not to the Minister of the Autocrat of all the REMUS, but to the Spanish Secretary at Madrid. Oh !" e xcla . med delightedly the relieved CLARENDON; " sets the wind in that quarter? it may putt' us an insult, but there's no fear of its coming to a any .o** A NEW VERSION OF AN OLD SONG IN THE EVENT OF A POSSIBLE ACCIDENT TO A CERTAIN PERSON. Atit—" 'Twas hi Trafalgar's Bay." ' fwa4 in the Turkish Bay With the Frenchmen's fleet we lay. Etteh heart was bounding thou. Ultimattuns were all smoke, For our ships were British oak, And hearts of oak our men. OM' GORDON matrk'd tl►em on the wave, Three cheers our gallant seamen gave, Which meant " give up your booty"— When through the line the signal ►an, tionoos expeets that eve►y man Will kiss the KmsKit's shoe-tie." And now to envoys four Despatches—notes—outpour, From CronnoN's goose quill grey. For eompromise he fought, For eompromise he wrought, A victory that day. Itut dearly was that victory woo. The Scottish thane himself was tioue, As part of Russia's booty. He cried, as in the dirt he roll'a, Behold, ye Englishmen, behold ! I've kissed the KAMM'S 8110 C-tie " At length his fatal lot Compelled the stubborn Scot His office to resign. " I'm going north," he said, " Your England wants a head. It's not content with mine." "In Russia's cause my life has pass'd. , In Russia's cause I fall at last, For Russia's hope of booty ! " Thus, ending as he'd ever been, England confessed that ABERDEEN Had kiss'd the KAMA'S shoe-tie! SATURDAY, LORD JOHN AND THE FLEET. (Facile OUR NAVAL CORRESPONDENT.) H.M.S. " BLUEBOTTLE," PORTSMOUTH, August —. I AM able, my dear sir, to inform you in confidence, that we had a visit from Lord JOHN here this last week, previous to his departure for Roseneath, during which he exhibited his nautical talents to all the advantage that might have been expected. It is to be hoped that this portends some wholesome demonstration in the Russian affair; for truly, at present, Government has shown itself to be much like a certain Captain of whom MARRYAT tells a story. This Captain was described by an officer as being " not fit to carry guts to a bear !" The officer, having to apologise for the expression, admitted that the Captain " was fit to carry guts to a bear !" I say, sir, that our Government has just exhibited faculties sufficient to per form this kind of complimentary service to the Great Beau• that over awes modern Europe. You know that the Admiralty just now prides itself on its atten tion to the navy. You see that " Sir JAMES GRAHAM, attended by —, inspected the dockyards." This would be all very fine, if these potentates were at all fit to judge; but, bless you! you might as well ask COBDEN'S opinion on a disputed reading in a classic as expect anything from these fellows in that line. Sir JAMES staring cautiously and artfully—with his sly physiognomy—at a PORTER'S anchor, or BERNAL OsnonNE grinning over a cylindrical block, is a ridiculous picture; however, they know what they're up to in their own way, and are really employed with an eye to the appointments. Within the last month we have had Whigs and Peelites enough promoted. Vipont on board us says, that you can always tell each fellow that enters, or gets promoted, by his name—that is, how he gets his berth. One half are Fitzgreym and Whiggingtons, from the offshoots of the Whig aristocratic families; the others are Rollers, Straps, Podds, etc., who are thrust in to flatter the trade supporters of the Coalition. I now proceed to give you a sketch of the proceedings of Lord JOHN on last. The Captain was seen coming off with a little man in the sternsheets, who, though in plain clothes, had a tremendously cocky air. Our skipper (who has an eye on a colony) hands his Lord ship the side-ropes, and with a few rapid steps up he jumped on deck, and began pacing about with an air of authority. " Set the top-gallants!" called out Lord JOHN to the Captain. " They are not bent, my Lord," says the skipper, as civil us possible. " Bent—bent !" says his Lordship ; " who said they were? I should suppose, sir, they were straight, or ought to be. And I'm (here, I regret to say, he brought in a word which he thought needful in a nautical conversation) if they shan't be while I command the vessel!" You may suppose that the skipper was tolerably astounded at this ; so we bent sails quietly, his Lordship looking on with pride in his eye. Presently he calls out, "Up with the anchor!" (The boatswain, who is a Radical, and has a cousin in for a northern borough, muttered, " Lord have mercy on um ! He doesn't know a rhinoceros from the forestay.") The skipper (who, by this time, was very pale) hinted to Lord JOHN that some preliminary orders were necessary, and urged that ho should retire to the cabin, and leave him to " carry on." " No ; shiver my timbers !" exclaimed he, giving a pretence of a hitch to his trousers, " if I don't command in Downing-street, I'm de termined to command here. Haul up the anchor !" The case being now desperate, our Captain hinted to his Lordship that he must direct the " messenger to be passed." On this he looked round, and asked him which was he? The skipper (suppressing a grin) intimated that it was not a man, but a chain, and persuaded him to call out, " Pass the messenger." By dint of judicious treatment, Lord JOHN was induced to honor., out the orders which were whispered in his ear, and so preserved an appearance of authority, while in reality he servilely obeyed. I am informed that this is his real position in his more peculiar sphere of life. He was observed (for you may be sure the eyes of everybody were upon him) to turn pale when the vessel was under way, and heeled over in a double-reefed-topsail breeze ; but, on the whole, he preserved very well his air, which was somewhat severe and pompous —though it soon became ghastly as we swept out. I regret to say that the breeze increased that afternoon, and Lord JOHN, having " carried on" himself (with the Captain at his elbow), was once going to put her about, when a fearful change was perceived in his countenance—his expression became terrible—and, for the rest of the afternoon, he was not seen out of the cabin.