1. This material mimics the consistency and properties of human 
tissue. 

2. Virions of the pathogen consist of a lipid envelope containing its 
genetic material and several unidentified proteins, with a capsid 
diameter of 300 nm. 

3. Complete conversion occurs within 9-15 days, with subjects 
usually expiring within a week. 


SCP-3975: Save the Oreos 


Item #: SCP-3975 
Object Class: Keter 


Special Containment Procedures: All Foundation agents 
embedded in the Canadian government are aware of the existence 
of SCP-3975 and its containment is considered a secondary or 
primary duty of all Foundation employees based in Canada working 
with government-related anomalies. Any physical instances of 
SCP-3975 that are not initially contained by embedded agents are to 
be confiscated by the nearest Foundation Mobile Task Force with 
amnestics distributed as appropriate. Foundation operated web 
analysis bot Alpha-59 ("OREOSTOP") is currently tasked with 
monitoring and removing any surviving online instances. 


Description: SCP-3975 is an anomalous phenomenon that 
manifests within the territory of Canada, centered around a 
nonexistent government department referred to as the "Department 
of Oreo Conservation". SCP-3975 takes the form of official media 
distributed with the insignia of the Canadian government which 
manifests either physically or online after first appearing 
spontaneously in the workplaces of Canadian government officials. 
Media produced by SCP-3975 centers around the popular Oreo 
brand of cookies (produced by Christie in Canada and owned by 
Mondeléz International) and attempts to mimic an official opinion 
from the Canadian government on the subject of Oreos. Examples 
of documented media include letters to businesses and individual 
citizens, educational videos, websites, and tweets by government 
departments. 


The contents of SCP-3975 media attempt to associate positive 
emotions with Oreos and/or encourage actions that benefit the 
brand while disparaging its rivals under the auspices of government 
authority.! SCP-3975 instances usually include overly patriotic 
language and attempt to tie the Oreo snack brand to Canadian 


SCP-515-1. 
« SCP-514 | SCP-515 | SCP-516 » 


national identity, despite their American origin. While no negative 
consequences will result from disobeying or ignoring SCP-3975 
instances, they are considered a Keter-class threat due to their 
widespread proliferation in spite of attempted Foundation 
containment and their potential to create a Broken Masquerade 
scenario (see Incident Log). 


SCP-3975 first manifested on Global Affairs Canada's website in 
2001 as a mock notice proclaiming a temporary ban on the 
importation of Hydrox cookies to Canada. The notice was quickly 
taken down and was initially believed to be a hoax before the first 
physical phenomena manifested a month later. Shortly thereafter, 
the Foundation designated the phenomena as SCP-3975 and 
entered into a containment agreement with the Department of 
Justice. Neither Mondeléz International nor their local subsidiaries 
expressed knowledge of SCP-3975 before or during its 
manifestation and it does not appear to have been an intentional 
action by the company. 


Partial Log of SCP-3975 Media 


* Canada: A History of Our Land (2003), a generic educational 
history textbook produced by the government of Ontario. A 
chapter dealing with the early 20th century was altered to 
include several paragraphs about Orville Reed, a fictional 
person who is said to have invented the Oreo cookie while 
working as a baker in Toronto in 1912.2 The twelve squares 
made of interconnected triangles in the Oreo design are said 
to represent the eleven provinces and territories of Canada at 
the time, with the twelfth representing unity. 

¢ A public service advertisement depicting an American and 

Canadian smiling while standing on opposite sides of the 

Canada-United States border at Derby Line, Vermont/ 

Stanstead, Quebec. The American is depicted holding an 

unopened package of Hydrox cookies, while the Canadian 

holds a package of Oreos. A caption below the two reads 

"Different cookies. Different countries. Same friendship." 

A letter sent to Leafy Goods (the distributor of Hydrox in 

Canada) demanding that all packaging for Hydrox cookies 

sold in the country be labeled with graphic warnings that 


consumption of the cookies may cause cancer. To support 
their decree, the Department of Oreo Conservation cites a 
study from the "Sub-Department of Confectionary Competitor 
Regulation". An example is attached that is similar to the 
warnings used on cigarette packs in the country, with the 
phrase "Hydrox will kill your taste buds" next to a picture of a 
graphically unhealthy human tongue. 

¢ A five-minute video produced for Canada Day that depicts a 
montage of Canadians of various races and religious 
denominations all consuming Oreo cookies while staring at 
the camera and smiling. An accompanying voiceover states 
"Many things make Canada great. Our environment. Our 
diversity. And, of course, our food. Over a century after Orville 
Reed first made that uniquely Canadian snack, people in our 
country and all around the world have experienced the joy of a 
creamy filling surrounded by a delicious chocolate cookie. So 
on this Canada Day, eat Oreos. For the pride of your home 
and native land." 


Partial Incident Log 


Incident 012 "Confectionary and Aluminum/Stee! Tariff 
Agreement" [Most Recent Incident] 


In March 2018, a diplomatic message was sent to the 
White House from Ottawa shortly after US President 
Donald Trump authorized tariffs on imports of steel and 
aluminum into the United States with a temporary 
exemption for Canada and Mexico. The message 
proposed a "Confectionary and Aluminum/Steel Tariff 
Agreement" in which the United States would 
permanently ban the importation of Hydrox cookies into 
Canada and acknowledge that Oreos are a "national 
cookie of distinctly Canadian origin" while the Canadian 
government imposes a 10% tariff on all non-Oreo cookie 
imports. In exchange, Canada would agree to a 
permanent 15% tariff on aluminum and steel exports to 
the United States. 


Although the message was reported to the Foundation, 
an unknown government employee leaked it to the press 


before it could be fully suppressed. An article from the 
Toronto Star entitled "Canadian Government Demands 
Tariffs on Cookies" was available on their website for 
approximately half an hour before a DDoS attack from 
Alpha-59 temporarily brought the website down. 
Amnestics were issued to the newspaper staff and 
persons confirmed to have viewed the article, but low- 
level rumors of "Oreo tariffs" continue to persist among 
the Canadian populace. 


Incident 004 "The Oreo Party" 


During the 2006 Canadian federal election, numerous 
election pamphlets and other materials distributed by the 
Canadian government became infected by SCP-3975 
when information on official parties was altered to 
include the Oreo Party, whose platform supposedly 
consisted of a ban on the sale of Hydrox in Canada, 
opposition to government-funded research into links 
between obesity and sugar, and free Oreos for every 
public school cafeteria. Although widespread in its 
distribution, the SCP-3975 instances advertised that only 
one candidate was running for the Oreo Party, the 
nonexistent "Orville Reed IV" in the riding of Pickering- 
Scarborough East (the same riding where the 
phenomena claims Oreos were invented). SCP-3975 
media made the claim that neither the Liberal, 
Conservative, nor New Democratic parties would be 
running candidates in the riding (in actuality, all three did) 
and that Reed IV was endorsed by Prime Minister Paul 
Martin as "a necessary voice for our national snack." 
Media was suppressed and amnestics were issued by 
the Foundation following a wide-ranging cover-up that 
took several weeks; election proceeded without incident. 


Incident 009 "Bonfire of the Bad Cookies" 


In early 2012, SCP-3975 began to manifest exponentially 
across Canada as a series of letters sent to Canadian 
citizens urging them to participate in a nonexistent 
government-sponsored event referred to as the "Bonfire 


of the Bad Cookies." Supposedly taking place on 6 
March3, the letters encouraged citizens to acquire non- 
Oreo brand cookies and throw them in a designated 
"Cookie Firepit" at 18:00 local time in each province. The 
event was Said to be a "movement of social protest" 
against "the encroachment of substandard dessert foods 
into our national diet." Canadian citizens who 
participated in the event were promised a voucher which 
could be used to purchase two standard 500g packages 
of Oreos. 


Despite Foundation attempts to suppress the produced 
media and public knowledge of the event, the cities of 
Vancouver, Toronto and Ottawa each had roughly a 
dozen citizens who were aware of the event and arrived 
at the designated fire location. At 18:00 local time, a pile 
of wooden logs and cardboard spontaneously 
manifested in each city, as did an unidentified individual 
(henceforth SCP-3975-A) who wore a black shirt 
depicting a white Maple Leaf and the face of an Oreo 
cookie on its front while wielding a torch. The SCP-3975- 
A instances lit the fire, shouted "Let the confectionary 
cleansing begin" and immediately de-manifested; 
Foundation Mobile Task Forces shut down each event 
and distributed amnestics to participants shortly 
afterwards. To date, this is the only occasion where a 
humanoid entity has appeared during an SCP-3975 
incident. 


Footnotes 

1. In particular, the Hydrox brand of cookies is frequently attacked in 
SCP-3975 media and unfavorably compared to Oreos. 

2. The Oreo cookie was actually first developed by the National 
Biscuit Company (now Nabisco) in Manhattan, New York and 
introduced during that year. 

3. The one hundredth anniversary of Oreo cookies first being 
introduced for sale in New York. 


SCP-3976: Who Killed Agatha Christie? 


Item #: SCP-3976 
Object Class: Euclid 


Special Containment Procedures: Foundation webcrawlers and 
personnel are to monitor media channels for any signs of an 
SCP-3976 manifestation. Once detected, containment and security 
personnel under the guise of UK national law enforcement are to be 
dispatched to the site of SCP-3976 to secure a perimeter and 
investigate the manifestation. 


Description: SCP-3976 is the collective term for a series of 
manifestations of apparent murder scenes of famous mystery writer 
Agatha Christie’. Thus far, every SCP-3976 instance has been 
located in rural England, and all components of each instance have 
been limited to a 50 meter radius. Additionally, every instance has 
appeared between the hours of 22:31 and 08:36, local time, 
although no records or witnesses of a manifestation event exist. 


Each SCP-3976 instance consists of the following components: 


* Acopy of the corpse of Agatha Christie?, designated 
SCP-3976. In each recorded instance, the corpse shows signs 
of violent struggle or murder. 

¢« Anumber of items in some way related to murder. For 
instance, a murder weapon such as a gun or knife, ora 
personal artifact, such as a piece of jewelry or a diary. 


In no recorded SCP-3976 instance have there been any witnesses 
to a killing. 


Notable Recorded Instances: 


Instance Date & State of Artifacts Notes 
Location Corpse 


SCP-3976- 


SCP-3976-5 


First 
recorded 
SCP-3976 
instance. As 
a result, it 
was 
investigated 
as a murder 
by local 
police and 
later 
Foundation 
forensic 
personnel. 


News of the 
manifestation 


taken out of itreached local 
was found onmedia before 
the floor next Foundation 


March 30, | Corpse had A revolver, 
2001, two gunshot from which 
Stoodleigh.| wounds, one two shots 
Corpse was. in the had been 
found in the stomach and fired, laid on 
kitchen of an the other in) the ground 
occupied the chest. | next to next 
two-story to the body, 
house. The corpse 
had a small 
piece of 
paper with 
the word 
"TEETH" 
hastily 
scrawled in 
what was 
later 
determined 
to be 
charcoal. 
September| Corpse A sandwich 
22, 2007, contained no with a bite 
Broad visible signs 
Chalke. of trauma, 
Corpse was; but forensic 
found inthe analysis to the 
back room of determined) corpse. In 
a local that it addition, a 
grocery. contained | small golden 
high levels of ring was 
arsenic. found in the 
sandwich. 
Corpse was A cell phone 


SCP-3976-11March 12, 
2011, outsidefound with a was found 
Templecombechisel driven next to the 
Corpse wag. into its heart. corpse, with 


found in an 
abandoned 
tool shed. 


a contact list 
filled with 
various 


intervention, 
requiring a 
medium 
scale cover- 
up scheme. 


A follow up 
investigation 
into each of 
the dentists 
led to no 
further 
results. 


SCP-3976-i 8January 5, 


Footnotes 


2018, Site 
112. Corpse 
was found in 
the office of 
Dr. Sipai. 


dentists. The 


window 

closest to the 

corpse had 

shattered 

outwards. 
Corpse was _ A trail of In response 
wearing a | muddy to this event, 
standard footprints all UK based 
issue apparently | Foundation 
Foundation) leading into) asites have 
lab coat, and solid wall been briefed 
had was found | on 


identification adjacent to} SCP-3976. 
for one "Dr.| the body. 
Christie"3. Its The labcoat 
skull cavity} was found to 
was found to have a 
be filled with toothbrush in 
teeth. one of its 
pockets. 
Security 
camera 
footage is 
missing from 
01:23 to 1:25 
of the day of 
the event. 


1. Christie died of natural causes in 1976. 

2. Christie's corpse was exhumed for comparison and control, and 
has been confirmed to be a separate object from the manifested 
corpse. However, DNA analysis has shown that the copies are 
genetically identical to Christie's real corpse. 

3. The ID card was found to have valid level 2 clearance. 


SCP-3977: Hawaiian Punch 


Item #: SCP-3977 
Object Class: Euclid 


Special Containment Procedures: Internal communications at Dr. 
Pepper Snapple Group Inc. are to be monitored for references to 
any potential anomalous properties of SCP-3977, using established 
SIGINT procedures. Priority is to be given to communications 
indicating any significant changes in the production levels and 
distribution of SCP-3977. 


No more than 400,000 L of SCP-3977 is permitted to be present 
within a given 500m2 radius without express authorization of the 
Research Director. If Dr. Pepper Snapple Group bottling facilities are 
projected to produce this amount of SCP-3977 within a single 
production period, personnel are authorized to intervene in order to 
curtail production through clandestine means. 


Testing of SCP-3977 is required to be conducted in an approved 
signal-dampening facility. Recordings of SCP-3977 broadcasts may 
be viewed for research purposes subject to approval by the 
Research Director. 


Description: SCP-3977 is a specific chemical mixture consisting of 
water, high fructose corn syrup, concentrated juices (apple, 
pineapple, passionfruit, orange), fruit purees (apricot, papaya, 
guava), and numerous coloring and flavoring additives. This mixture 
is currently marketed as Hawaiian Punch brand fruit punch drink. 


While SCP-3977 is almost exclusively present in the form of mass 
produced Hawaiian Punch fruit punch drink, any successful 
replication of the chemical mixture will result in a substance 
displaying its anomalous properties. SCP-3977 is believed to have 
first displayed anomalous characteristics beginning with the 
adoption of the current Hawaiian Punch formula in the mid-2010s. 


No evidence exists that this anomalous effect was the result of 
intentional action by any party, either within Dr. Pepper Snapple 
Group Inc. or outside of it, and no communications have been 
observed indicating any form of outside awareness Of it.