SCP-2476-1 is a cognitohazard affecting those who have not 
learned of SCP-2476's alias by reading its tattoo, or have not yet 
perceived it's anomalous properties occur directly. Under these 
circumstances, information subjects learn will be falsified to fit the 
theme of the 1975 film Monty Python And The Holy Grail. 
Fabrications caused by SCP-2476-1 vary depending on the type of 
information learned and will persist with each subject. Subjects will 
continue to experience SCP-2476-1 as they learn more information 
regarding SCP-2476, and will only cease once they have perceived 
SCP-2476's actual anomalous properties in action. 


SCP-2476 suffers from extreme delusions regarding instruments 
and objects capabilities to inflict harm on others, believing items of a 
safe and benign nature to instead be the most effective. All 
instruments utilized by SCP-2476 which under regular 
circumstances would be effective in inflicting physical harm and 
injuries to others will become completely ineffective. SCP-2476 will 
utilize whatever instrument it uses in a highly ineffective manner, 
preventing the target from receiving any physical pain whatsoever. 
Notable delusions include perceiving a bat to be a baguette and a 


pair of knives to be a pair of sofa cushions. 


Recovery: SCP-2476 was originally detained on the 11th of January 
2017, when Foundation web crawlers located the use of the phrases 
Gamers Against Weed and Mr. Monty Python And The Holy Grail on 
numerous social networking accounts mentioning an unknown 
individual in , North Carolina, United States who had caused 
several public disturbances. SCP-2476 was located in a nearby 
bookstore when retrieved, dressed in an outfit resembling that of the 
Spanish Inquisition costumes used in the Monty Python sketches of 
the same name, attempting to attack a cashier ineffectively with a 
desk lamp, for selling ‘unorthodox’ reading material. Foundation 
agents were able to detain it without incident. Amnestics were 
dispatched to all witnesses effectively. 


SCP-2476-1 became apparent after multiple Foundation personnel 
were informed of SCP-2476s recovery by agents. Temporary 
containment was prepared for SCP-2476 based upon falsified 
information given to Foundation personnel. Personnel were met with 
surprise upon SCP-2476's arrival due to its unexpected effects. All 
personnel involved were given amnestic treatment. 


Interview Log 
The following is a partial interview performed by Dr. Belle several 
days after the recovery of SCP-2476. 


+ Interview Log 2476-1 
<Begin Log> 


SCP-2476: Ello! We're gonna start another 
interview? 


Dr. Belle: Yes, if that’s alright with you. 


SCP-2476: Good! Good! What did ya wanna 
talk about? 


Dr. Belle: We were hoping to discuss the 
creation of your anomalous properties. 


SCP-2476: Really? Well.... God. | honestly 


have no clue what to tell you (sniggers). | 
wouldn't really know what was going on in 
those guys heads at the time when they made 
me. They probablies just poured a whole bag 
of cocaine on a table and just started shoving 
their heads into it like: (SCP-2476 raises its 
head into the air and widens its eyes) 
“Aaaaaagghhhhh’! 


Dr. Belle: You seem quite energetic today. 
SCP-2476: Haha! (in a higher pitch) | know! 
SCP-2476: ...Can | have my outfit back? 


Dr. Belle: Sorry, but | told you before, that's 
not possible. 


SCP-2476: Oh, poooh! 


Dr. Belle: But in all seriousness, what do you 
believe was the point of your creation? All 
other Misters so far have been made with at 
least some meaningful idea in mind. Not to say 
you yourself are somehow less... We are just 
finding it difficult to understand why you were 
made like this. 


SCP-2476: | don’t know really. | think it was 
less off “We’re gonna make something 
meaningful to make people think. Yeah, we’re 
edgy and deep!” and more like “Guys. We 
need to do this, it'll be fucking incredible.”. Or 
maybe like a reverse thing? Like it’s a clever 
idea presented in a really stupid way? 


Dr. Belle: That would make sense... Speaking 
of, how do you feel during your well, episodes? 


SCP-2476: It’s really weird! It’s not like | don’t 
remember doing it. It's more like when you're 


really hyper, you know? When you’re in that 
zone of crazy? it’s like that but times one- 
hundred. | just go around acting all mental like 
‘Ha ha!’ 


Dr. Belle: And how do you feel after the 
experience? 


SCP-2476: try not to really think about it. But 
honestly, sometimes | look back on it and am 
like “Oh God... What the hell were you doing!? 
You fool!”. Those surveillance tapes you 
showed me were pretty funny though. The 
peoples’ reactions alone were enough to cheer 
me up, so thanks for that. 


Dr. Belle: Glad it helped. Another question, 
how were you able to know about gamers 
against weed? When we asked about your 
earliest memories, you said you'd woken up in 


SCP-2476: | remember some things from what 
| guess you'd call 'before’. They're not really 
clear memories, more like information | woke 
up with. | think whatever process they used to 
create me involved making me but only partly, 
and then editing aspects of me... to see how | 
behaved or... something... Um... 


Dr. Belle: Do you have a problem 
remembering? We can continue this at a later 
date. 


SCP-2476: Nah nah it's good. It’s just a bit 
difficult to talk about certain parts. 


SCP-2476: Let’s see... Agh! Fuck, this is 
complicated! The information | know was from 
what they mentioned when they were making 
me, kind of like how when you're a baby you 


manner similar to many species of the Anthozoa class. Buildings 
converted into SCP-274-1 lure passing civilians by emitting noises 
from inside SCP-274-1. Sounds of glass breaking, loud coughing, or 
pained whimpers have all been reported from D-class personnel. It 
is currently unknown whether SCP-274-1 or the SCP-274-2s are 
responsible for this behavior, as the noises stop immediately after 
entry. 


Typically, civilians will either call the police, or investigate the noises 
themselves. As subjects search inside SCP-274-1, they will be 
recognized as food by instances of SCP-274-2, if any are present. 
When a victim enters a room inside SCP-274-1, barring the entry 
way they will immediately be suctioned into a gastrovacular cavity 
belonging to SCP-274-1, later processing them into SCP-274 and 
one instance of SCP-274-2. 


Specimens of SCP-274-2 are organisms composed of SCP-274 that 
appear as men or women wearing a gas mask or respirator, along 
with a bright, pastel colored hoodie. SCP-274-2 is able to support its 
heavy weight by its thickness and density in its membrane, which 
consists of 45-50% of the mass of SCP-274-2. 


SCP-274-2 act as nematocysts for SCP-274-1, and can disguise 
themselves by merging into the walls. This is done by heavily 
compacting themselves, and implanting itself into an interior wall, 
save for their ‘mask’, which flattens around the wall, and disguises 
itself as standard graffiti. This behavior has proven to be a means of 
ambushing food for SCP-274-1, and will only react when it detects 
something it considers a food source. 


SCP-274-2 possess a hinged operculum that ejects SCP-274 
located in their right hand. This operculum looks identical to a 
normal spray can, and can project SCP-274 in a similar manner. 
SCP-274-2 will attempt to spray SCP-274 into the eyes and mouth 
of its victims in an attempt to incapacitate and encapsulate them. 
This method of attack has shown to be very painful, and will blind 
and numb the victim from the neck down. Once tagged, the victim is 
placed into a gastrovascular cavity, resulting in a new SCP-274-2. 


SCP-274-2 are able to duplicate themselves while inside an 
instance of SCP-274-1, and will produce one new SCP-274-2 every 


take in things you hear people say. Except you 
know, i’m a fully grown guy with an almost fully 
developed brain (/aughs) | do remember 
watching the Holy Grail like a thousand times 
though... 


Dr. Belle: Well thank you, You've managed to 
give us a lot of helpful information. 


SCP-2476: Hehe, didn't expect it? 
Dr. Belle: Ok, you need to settle down. 


<End Log> 


Document 2476-8745 


The following document was found on SCP-2476's person when 
recovered. It is reproduced below in its entirety. 


Holy Heck! You've just found yourself your very own Mr. 
Spanish Inquisition by Gamers Against Weed! | didn't 
expect this. Who is Dr. Wondertainment? 


Collect them all and become Mr. Gamer! 


01. Mr. Literal Serial Killer 

02. Mr. Normie 

03. Mr. Bernie Sanders 

04. Mr. Get Anything For Free In Any Shop 
20. Mr. Sex Number 

21. Mr. Heavenly Virtues 

22. Mr. Deadly Sins 

23. Mr. Original Character 

24. Mr. D.A.R.E. 

25. Mr. Gentrification 

26. Ms. Mad About Video Games 
27. Mr. Meme 

28. Mr. Ominous (discontinued) 
29. Mr. Destiny 


30. Mr. Spanish Inquisition Y 

31. Ms. Zapatista 

32. Mr. Hax 

33. Mr. Just Has The Tattoo 
34. Mr. Top Text and Mr. Bottom Text 
35. Mr. Finale 


« SCP-2475 | SCP-2476 | SCP-2477 » 


SCP-2477: Inertial Dampeners 


Item #: SCP-2477 
Object Class: Euclid 


Special Containment Procedures: All Foundation containment 
procedure proposals are to be monitored for SCP-2477 
methodology. All proposals determined to be affected by SCP-2477 
are to be denied. (For a list of plausible reasons for denial, please 
see Document SCP-2477-Thoth.) Foundation astronomical assets 
are to maintain continuous tracking of all known Type A instances, 
as well as Type B-C instances wherever possible. 


Engineering conference papers, presentations, and government 
proposals are to be monitored by Foundation web-crawlers for pre- 
SCP-2477 reasoning. Mobile Task Force Psi-18 (“Tenure Trackers”) 
are to intervene with any identified researchers by providing financial 
incentives towards approved avenues of research. SCP-2477- 
positive researchers (internal or external) may also be considered 
for recruitment into the Experimental Containment Research Group. 


In the event of any proposal to create a singular, well-funded site for 
the storage of radioactive or other extremely hazardous material at a 
national or international level, Mobile Task Force Rho-17 (“Not in My 
Back Yard”) is to exert local political pressure to prevent the 
completion of such a project. 


Description: SCP-2477 consists of a novel, nonobvious series of 
solutions to statics! equations based on erroneous interpretations of 
Newtonian physics. SCP-2477 are most often encountered in well- 
funded projects dedicated to the complete containment or isolation 
of physical objects. As SCP-2477 solutions are derived from 
practical rather than abstract theoretical applications, they are much 
more likely to be discovered by engineers than by physicists. 


Given sufficient resources, SCP-2477 can be used to construct 


devices capable of eliminating all outside forces affecting an object. 
These include gravity, electromagnetism, friction, physical contact, 
and particle-based radiation. These devices also fix the contained 
object to a single position by eliminating all inertia. 


Unfortunately, the anomalous calculations required to complete 
SCP-2477 solutions cannot be resolved within the reference frame 
of a fixed point on the Earth’s surface. Instead, objects are fixed in 
place in comparison with some other astronomical object or 
reference point, and remain in this position with no regard for the 
movement of the Earth. There are known solutions to these 
equations, each associated with a different point of reference. 


Researchers using brute-force computer analysis to solve these 
equations are significantly less likely to recognize this reference 
frame error when constructing an SCP-2477-based device. Please 
see Addendum SCP-2477-lota for a list of Known SCP-2477 
solutions and example uses. 


Addendum SCP-2477-lota: First known SCP-2477 incidents 


Type Reference Contents Results 
Frame 
A The Sun (Solar Gyroscopes Researchers at 
Plane) used for the [DATA 

absolute REDACTED] 
calibration of | Corporation 
navigation attempted to 
equipment. isolate six 


separate devices 
across a one 
month period 
before the 
Foundation 
could intervene. 
Contents 
estimated to 
cross Earth’s 
path every April 
through , and 
are typically 


The Milky Way|_ Isolation 
(Galactic Core) chamber for 
supercollider| 

meant to 
improve 
detection and 
containment of 
antimatter. 


Center of the Keter-Class 
Universe, LTB; SCP- 
Model 

(Unconfirmed) 


associated with 
an incidence of 
at least two 
cases of severe 
radiation 
poisoning in the 
[DATA 
REDACTED] 
urban region. 
Containment 
equipment 
levitated 5000 t 
of sensor banks 
and magnetic 
shielding into 
upper 
atmosphere 
before 
disintegrating. 
Contained 
sensor packages 
continue to 
transmit data 
and are believed 
to be exiting the 
solar plane at 
200 km/s. 
Contents 
spontaneously 
converted to 
coherent mass 
of neutrinos, 
Alpha, Beta, 
Gamma, and 
[DATA 
EXPUNGED] 
particles.2 
GOES satellites 
identified a burst 
of radiation 


D Unknown A manned 
spacecraft 
intended to test 
inertia-free 
launch 
conditions, with 
four crew. 


Document SCP-2477-D-1953: Title unavailable 


traveling towards 
the Crab Nebula 
at .11c3. 
Attempts to 
recontain SCP- 
are 
considered 
unfeasible. 
External 
observers noted 
a rapid 
acceleration of 
movements 
within capsule 
accompanied by 
a visible 
blueshift. The 
capsule then 
dematerialized, 
leaving a 
permanent 
visual 
afterimage. The 
flight recorder 
continued 
transmitting for 
hours afterward. 
Selected 
contents are 
available in 
Document 
SCP-2477- 
D-1953. 


This document has been archived due to limited requests for 


access. 


[Access historical archive] 


Document SCP-2477-D-1953: Selected 
portions of the mission log of Col. 


The following statements were transcribed 
from timestamped audio logs stored on reel-to- 
reel magnetic tape. These recordings 
remained undeciphered for years after 
recovery until a sufficiently powerful predictive 
decompression algorithm could be developed. 
From storage space for approximately 28 
hours of low-quality audio information, 

hours of audio logs were recovered. 


19 -03-01 00:27:51: We've come so far now. 
The sun and the stars are gone. The night sky 
doesn’t seem any brighter, but Maj. says it 
seems more red. Maybe she’s right. The 
Earth's come along with us, or at least a pale 
shadow of it. We left the capsule months back. 
We can flit around anywhere we want, faster 
than you can imagine, but we can’t touch 
anything outside the capsule. No response 
from anyone, nothing over the radio since the 
launch went pear-shaped. Everything and 
everyone out there is slowed to an infinitesimal 
crawl. 


20 -07-15 17:45:05: Everything that was 
blocked from the sky is gone now. Everything 
that was under a roof, or a cloud, or a damn 
bus stop, all gone. Pure black. The people we 
love move in and out of the shadows as the 
years crawl on for us. Mostly in. It’s hard to 
watch. Everything that was in darkness is gone 
too. We can blaze through the nighttime cities, 
but anywhere out in the country, or out at sea, 
nothing. An entire hemisphere disappeared 
behind us years ago. 


2 -01-24 14:21:35: — died today, or 


whatever moment today would have been for 
her. She was sitting out in the sunlight. She 
looked ancient. | don't know. Maybe this 
Earth's not real, maybe the whole thing's a sick 
joke. | just... for all the years I've watched her, 
| wish she could've seen me, just once. We've 
voted, and the crew and | are all in agreement 
now. We're going to take a closer look at the 
device. We haven't been able to disable it so 
far, but we've got nothing but time. 


-08-13 10:11:45: Control, or whoever is 
there, please ignore the last messages. 
We've all come to our senses now. | promise.