Description: SCP-2269-1 is an elderly Irish-American female and 
former resident of [REDACTED], Florida, 87 years of age at time of 
initial containment. SCP-2269-1 suffers from a mild case of 
Alzheimer's disease as well as several other age-related illnesses 
(see Document 2269-09: Additional Medical Concerns) but is 
otherwise physiologically normal for a baseline human subject. 


SCP-2269-2 is a colony of spiders that appears to inhabit 
SCP-2269-1, consisting of possibly over 20,000 individuals from 
over 580 identified species ranging from Salticidae specimens less 
than 1 mm in size to Nephilidae specimens up to 5cm in size. 
Instances of SCP-2269-2 have been observed freely moving 
through SCP-2269-1's clothing and entering and exiting its orifices 
without generating discomfort or pain in any way. Furthermore, while 
instances of SCP-2269-2 have been observed capturing and killing 
parasitic insects attempting to infest SCP-2269-1, the colony does 
not appear to require any direct sustenance. As such, it is currently 
speculated that the bulk of SCP-2269-2 normally occupies an 


extradimensional space. 


SCP-2269-2's primary purpose appears to be the maintenance of 
SCP-2269-1's health. Whenever SCP-2269-1 is injured, a large 
number of SCP-2269-2 instances will work together to attempt to 
repair the damage inflicted. Prior to initial containment, SCP-2269 
had come to the Foundation's attention following an incident in 
which SCP-2269-1 was severely injured in an auto-pedestrian 
accident. A field agent embedded in local emergency response 
contacted the Foundation and a containment team was dispatched. 
When the containment team arrived, the following observations were 
made: 


¢ Several dozen large Nephilidae specimens were observed 
working together to bandage SCP-2269-1's cuts, using spun 
spider silk to bind the wounds. 

¢ Numerous specimens of Salticidae were observed working 
together to remove foreign contaminants such as broken glass 
and dirt. 


Upon recovery and transport to provisional containment, additional 
observations were made by the receiving medical team: 


¢ A large number of microscopic Symphytognathidae were 
present in SCP-2269-1's skull, attempting to repair ruptured 
blood vessels, remove clotted blood, and maintain blood flow 
through SCP-2269-1's brain. 

¢ Several Araneidae were present in SCP-2269-1's chest cavity, 
stimulating the lungs and heart through unknown means. 
Twice during the initial containment process, medical 
personnel reported momentary cardiac arrest which resulted 
in a burst of activity from the Araneidae specimens followed 
by resuscitation shortly thereafter. 


Despite the severity of its injuries, SCP-2269-1 eventually made a 
full recovery and has remained relatively healthy since initial 
containment. SCP-2269-1 is either unable or unwilling to speak or 
otherwise communicate with Foundation personnel regarding its 
current condition, but expresses agitation when instances of 
SCP-2269-2 are removed by Foundation personnel for testing 
purposes. SCP-2269-1 has, in writing, requested materials with 


which it can knit and weave but otherwise has not made any 
requests of containment personnel. 


Addendum 2269-1: Interview Transcript, - - 

The following transcript is of an interview performed by Agent 
while posing as a local police officer conducting post-incident 
interviews of [REDACTED]'s neighbors. 


Agent —_: Do you mind if | ask you a few questions 
about [REDACTED]? 


Mr. : Not at all. Shame what happened to her, she 
was a weird one but a really nice old lady. She deserved 
better. 


Agent — : Whatcan you tell me about her? 


Mr. : Not a lot, really. I've lived here close to 
fourteen, fifteen years and she'd lived here long before 
then. The neighbors tell me she'd been there as long as 
anyone can remember. Never had any trouble with her, 
really, since she kept to herself and only came out to get 
groceries. She never complained about anything, kept a 
clean house, had a beautiful garden. Would have been 
picturesque if it weren't for those spiders. 


Agent __: Spiders? 


Mr. : She, uhh, raised spiders. | don't know, really, | 
never paid much attention but apparently she collected 
them and raised them on her lot. She's got all those trees 
on her property, right? She had hundreds, maybe 
thousands of 'em. Cared for them, too, really liked them. 
Kinda creepy if you ask me, but she was a really nice 
lady otherwise. 


Agent _ : Was there anything... strange about them? 


Mr. : Stranger than raising a thousand spiders in 
your yard? No, not really. 


SCP-261: Pan-Dimensional Vending 


Item #: SCP-261 
Object Class: Safe 


Special Containment Procedures: Any access to SCP-261 must 
be approved by staff with level 2 security clearance or higher. Any 
and all items dispensed by SCP-261 must be recorded, along with 
the amount of money entered and the amount of time elapsed 
between uses. Currently, SCP-261 may be used only ten times ina 
twenty-four hour period, with no transaction exceeding the 
equivalent of 500 Japanese yen. Testing approved by Site 
Command is not under these restrictions. 


Items dispensed by SCP-261 should be reviewed by Site Health and 
Safety officials before consumption. Failure to do so releases the 
Foundation from any obligation regarding negative effects. Items 
deemed dangerous or useful to research will be confiscated by site 
security, with financial compensation provided in proportion to 
money spent. 


Description: SCP-261 appears to be a large black vending machine 
with no front glass panel, and a small keypad on the right side. 
SCP-261 was recovered in Yokohama, Japan. SCP-261 was 
brought to the Foundation’s attention after investigation of an “urban 
legend” about a “magic vending machine” that was circulating on the 
internet. SCP-261 was found in a back alley behind a large shopping 
center, with a hand-written sign saying “out of order” in Japanese 
taped to it. SCP-261 has no marks or identification of any kind, and 
no locals remember when or how it came to be in its current 
location. 


Internally, SCP-261 appears to be a basic vending machine 
equipped to vend food and beverage items. After a key was made 
and the front door opened, no abnormal materials were found, and it 
was determined that SCP-261 has never actually contained any 


Agent _ : Didshe ever say anything to you? 


Mr. : About the spiders? Yeah, actually. | only ever 
really talked to her once or twice, but | figured that 
everyone asked, right? She said that she liked them, and 
that they were just as much a part of Mother Nature as 
we were. She treated them real nice, and they kept the 
bugs out of her house. Kinda makes sense, if you think 
about it, with us so close to the marshes and such. 


Agent _ : Anything else we should know? 


Mr. : No, not really. Like | said, she was real nice 
and it's a shame. | hope she's in a better place, anyways. 


« SCP-2268 | SCP-2269 | SCP-2270 » 


SCP-2270: An Unnecessary Utilization of Excessive 
Force 


Item #: SCP-2270 
Object Class: Euclid 


Special Containment Procedures: Written or electronic 
information pertaining to SCP-2270 or the incantations relating to 
SCP-2270 (specifically instances of SCP-2270-A) is to be strictly 
controlled, and all original documents kept in a high security storage 
locker at Site-81. Under no circumstances are unauthorized 
personnel to access or view the aforementioned documents. 


Foundation intelligence assets are to monitor internet and media 
sources for signs of information related to SCP-2270. Individuals 
found to be in possession of SCP-2270 material are to be 
apprehended, questioned, and then released following amnestic 
treatment unless follow-up investigation is warranted. 


Description: SCP-2270 is the group designation for specific 
information, incantations and rituals pertaining to the Mesopotamian 
god of war and the Sun, Nergal’. This information can take many 
forms, but it is believed that the original source of these incantations 
is a series of eight texts by a Romanian Renaissance author and 
philosopher, Sorin Vasilica?. These texts, collectively titled Recurs 
catre EreshkigaB and designated SCP-2270-A, exist in few original 
copies. 


SCP-2270-A is written in sporadic, occasionally nonsense prose, 
which will occasionally devolve into extremely intricate and 
complicated explanations of rituals and incantations required to 
persuade Nergal to attack a large, overwhelming enemy force. The 
eight volumes each describe a different section of the "appeal", 
summaries of which are listed below; 


1. Volume | - "A Cry In the Blistering Wind" - Volume describes 


the reasons why a mortal would dare to seek counsel with 

Nergal, when the entity's very presence would be enough to 

scorch the entire Earth. Rituals contained include those 

designed to appeal to Nergal's divine righteousness. 

. Volume Il - "A Call for Blood Spilled" - Volume describes how 

Nergal cannot be communicated with by mortals4, but those 

seeking blood call out to him nonetheless. Rituals contained 

include those designed to appeal to Nergal's fury. 

. Volume Ill - "A Beckoning" - Volume describes how, in order 

to seek the attention of the divine, the pursuant must first seek 

out Nergal's primary consort, Ereshkigal, who alone sits at 

Nergal's right hand. Rituals contained include those designed 

to appeal to Nergal's attention through Ereshkigal. 

. Volume IV - "Appeal to Ereshkigal" - Volume describes how 

one would speak to the half-divine she-torturer Ereshkigal, 

and what would need to be said to convince her to speak to 

Nergal on the pursuant's behalf. It is implied heavily that 

Ereshkigal communicates with and controls the will of Nergal 

through fornication. Rituals contained include those designed 

to appeal to Nergal's lust. 

. Volume V - "/ndication of Divine Guilt" - Volume describes 

what must be said and done to identify a target of Nergal's 

fury, and how to relay that information through Ereshkigal> by 
crafting the words needed in her language. Rituals contained 
include those designed to appeal to Nergal's piercing gaze. 

. Volume VI6 - "Acceptance of Eternal Consequence" - Volume 
describes the consequences of summoning Nergal. 
Specifically, those who bind themselves to the deity are, upon 
death, enslaved to its furnace in the sun to stoke the fires of 
its hatred eternally. No rituals are believed to be described 
within this volume. 

. Volume VII - "A Sacrifice of Life / A Final Appeal" - Volume 
describes how, after successfully appealing to Ereshkigal and 
accepting the consequences, the pursuant must make a final 
appeal to Nergal by way of a blood sacrifice. Ereshkigal then 
takes the blood spilled from this sacrifice and presents it to 
Nergal, who then consumes it to trigger his bloodlust. Rituals 
contained include those designed to appeal to Nergal's wrath. 

. Volume VIII - "Victatorius" - Volume describes the prayer that 
must be given to Nergal while the deity delivers its judgement 


against the "Guilt", in order to assure Nergal of the pursuant's 
resolve. The prayer, which itself is written over four hundred 
pages and takes up 97% of the volume, must be read start to 
finish without pause. It is explained that, should the pursuant 
be unable to do this, Nergal will instead destroy the pursuant 
instead of the Guilt. Ritual contained is a single prayer. 


SCP-2270-B is the entity described within SCP-2270-A, currently 
believed to be the deity Nergal. Based on current records, it is 
believed that SCP-2270-B has only manifested once: during Incident 
2270-Alpha’. SCP-2270-B manifested as a massive, vividly colored 
arm, extending towards the Earth from the Sun. SCP-2270-B has 
been observed as being capable of a single, focused ballistic strike 
with an estimated force of 275 petajoules®. 


Addendum 2270.1: Incident 2270-Alpha 


On March 16th, 1994, a massive explosion was detected near the 
town of Fort Peck, Montana. Cover stories of an accidental 
explosion at an army weapons depot were quickly disseminated 
amongst the public while Foundation agents worked to discover the 
source. The only recording of the incident was an accidental one, 
and due to the atmospheric effects of SCP-2270-B's manifestation, 
the recording was badly damaged. 


In the aftermath of Incident 2270-Alpha, it was discovered that a 
local man, Jerry Hubert of Augusta, Montana, had recently been 
inquiring about information relating to SCP-2270 in internet 
chatrooms dedicated to the occult9. After an initial investigation was 
unable to locate Mr. Hubert, a raid on his Augusta home discovered 
a series of emails to a contact from the Rutherford Group, a supplier 
for the American division of Marshall, Carter and Dark, Ltd. In the 
messages, Mr. Hubert requests information pertaining to SCP-2270, 
and later purchases the entirety of a nearly complete set of 
SCP-2270-A for $75,000. Further investigation was unable to 
determine the identity of the contact, nor the location from which the 
SCP-2270-A set was sent. 


Below are excerpts from the aforementioned emails, detailing Mr. 
Hubert's negotiation with the supplier and their follow-up 
conversation; 


To: ten.f8kajf8|jfd0 1 8F2j8G#ten.f8kajf8|jfd01 8F2j8G 
From: moc.tent|98buhj#moc.tent|98buhj 
Subject: question 


hello. | am writing to you to inquire about the books you 
described as having for sale on . Lam interested 
in finding out how much | can purchase them for. my 
name is jerry please email me at moc.tent| 
98buhj#moc.tent|98buhj. thank you 


To: ten.f3kajf8|jfd0 1 8F2j8G#ten .f8kajfs|jfd01 8F2j8G 
From: moc.tent|98buhj#moc.tent|98buhj 
Subject: price? 


i have wired the 25 thousand dollars to you. i will wire the 
rest when i receive the package. thank you. 


To: ten.f8kajf8|jfd0 1 8F2j8G#ten.f8kajf8|jfd01 8F2j8G 
From: moc.tent|98buhj#moc.tent|98buhj 
Subject: recieved 


i have recieved the packages. these look really good. 
this will do the trick, hun? because i am about sick and 
tired of this asshole dave. did i tell you his dog pissed on 
my lawn again last night. because it did. im gonna get 
this guy good. 


To: ten.f3kajf8|jfd0 1 8F2j8G#ten .f8kajfs|jfd01 8F2j8G 
From: moc.tent|98buhj#moc.tent|98buhj 
Subject: help 


there are a lot of steps in these things. do i need to read 
all of it for it to work? 


To: ten.f8kajf8|jfd0 1 8F2j8G#ten .f8kajf8|jfd01 8F2j8G 
From: moc.tent|98buhj#moc.tent|98buhj 
Subject: blood? 


what does it mean when it says blood sacrifice. also 
dave parked in front of my house again today even 
though i told him not to last week. hes definielly going to 


get his soon 


To: ten.f8kajf8|jfd0 1 8F2j8G#ten .f8kajf8|jfd01 8F2j8G 
From: moc.tent|98buhj#moc.tent|98buhj 
Subject: help again 


i just read the part about eternal consequences. thats not 
for real right? 


To: ten.f8kajf8|jfd0 1 8F2j8G#ten.f8kajf8|jfd01 8F2j8G 
From: moc.tent|98buhj#moc.tent|98buhj 
Subject: ready 2 go! 


hey man its jerry. ive got everything set up just like it 
says in the book. im gonna do what you said and wait til 
he goes out to hunt there by the river so nobody else is 
around. cant wait for this to work! hope he takes his yard 
shitting dog with him. thanks again 


After further investigation, Foundation agents discovered that Mr. 
Hubert passed away on March 16th, 1994, after he drove his vehicle 
down an embankment, colliding with a tree and killing him instantly. 
It is believed he was driving home after conducting the SCP-2270 
ritual. An empty 12-pack of Coors Light beer was found in the 
backseat of his vehicle, along with the SCP-2270-A manuscripts that 
Mr. Hubert had acquired. The individual identified in the emails, 
believed to be Dave Terrell of Augusta, Montana, was never found. 


Footnotes 

1. 7393 in the original Hebrew.