Comments: The video depicted the final 
match of the 2017 ACF Nationals tournament, 
played between teams from the University of 
Maryland and the University of Chicago. Ina 
tossup about her, Dr. , a Foundation 
memeticist, was said to be a "leader in the 
field of memetics." Describing research 
conducted by Dr. in the field of counter- 
memetics, the tossup verbally gave a counter- 
meme said to be created by Dr. __, followed 
by the meme it countered’. When tested on 
D-75500, the meme caused D-75500 to clap 
uncontrollably until he was given the counter- 
meme. After Experiment-2405-279198, 
mandatory screening by a CSES was 
implemented. 


Identification Number: 427028 
Comments: The video depicted the final 
match of the 2017 National Jinshé® Selection 
tournament, played between two teams of 
unaffiliated players, all of whom appeared to 
be of Han Chinese and/or Native American 


descent. All questions were given in Classical 
Chinese, and the distribution of questions 
eschewed typically-included subjects like 
science and fine arts in favor of Confucian 
classics and pre-Qing Dynasty era Chinese 
history. After the conclusion of the match, the 
members of the winning team were given 
embroidered badges, which were sewn into 
their clothes in a ceremony to confer them the 
status of jinshi of an "Imperial Republic of 
Fusang9." 


Identification Number: 552071 

Comments: The video depicted the final 
match of a competition between two groups 
identified as the Kara and S6rf clans. All 
questions were given in a language 
resembling Proto-Turkic, with loanwords from 
Siouan languages. Said language has not yet 
been completely translated by Foundation 
linguists, but linguistic analysis of the 
questions suggested that they concerned 
animal husbandry, migration patterns, raids on 
other nomadic peoples, and shamanic 
knowledge. A violent dispute erupted in the 
middle of the match between two players over 
differences in their clans' shamanic teachings, 
resulting in both players being summarily 
expelled. The "lecture hall" in which the match 
took place was not part of a building, but was 
instead a large tent erected on a field. 


Identification Number: 759409 
Comments: The video depicted the final 
match of an unnamed tournament, played 
between teams from the "Harvard School of 
Elocution" and the "State Recitation 
Academy." All individuals present wore dress 
uniforms similar to those of US Army officers. 
Prior to the beginning of the match, each 


player swore an oath, declaring, "I stand in 
solidarity with the Overseers, who shelter us 
from the darkness of the Catastrophe. | raise 
my voice and my mind upwards towards 
knowledge, so that we may reclaim the Lost 
Words." The distribution of the questions 
completely eschewed literature, fine arts, 
history, and science (with the exception of 
nuclear physics) in favor of agriculture, 
mechanics, military science, and elocution. No 
electrical appliances were visible in the video, 
and the room was lit by gas lamps. No written 
words, writing implements, or writing surfaces 
were visible in the video, and unlike nearly all 
previous videos, the questions were not read 
by the moderator, but recited from memory. 


Footnotes 

1. Commonly known by the filename extension .mp4. 

2. Notably, this is not true for copies of instances of SCP-2405 
created through other methods. 

3. An academic competition played using a lockout buzzer system, 
in which two teams of up to four players compete to answer "tossup" 
questions. Interruption of the question is allowed, so that deeper 
knowledge about the topic in question is rewarded. After a player 
answers a tossup correctly without conferring, their team will be 
given a three-part bonus question, with varying difficulty between the 
parts, on which conferring is allowed. If a player does not answer a 
tossup correctly, their teammates will be not allowed to attempt to 
answer the question. 

4. Twenty tossups, twenty three-part bonus questions. 

5. The ACF is the leading collegiate quizbowl organization, which 
organizes several annual competitions. 

6. American socialist politician of the early 20thcentury. 

7. When Dr. was interviewed, she stated, "I've never created 
such a thing, though now I'm starting to wish | had." 

8. The highest possible rank achievable in the civil service 
examination system of Imperial China. 

9. Aland in Chinese mythology described as being east across the 
Pacific Ocean, which in this divergent historical context likely refers 


to North America. 


« SCP-2404 | SCP-2405 | SCP-2406 » 


SCP-2406: The Colossus 


Item #: SCP-2406 
Object Class: Safe 


Special Containment Procedures: Provisional Site-31 has been 
built around SCP-2406 and is to maintain the facade of a 
Kazakhstani military facility. Type A hazmat suits are mandatory 
when working directly with SCP-2406, as is decontamination upon 
exit. A security perimeter of armed guards is to remain in place at all 
time in order to prevent unauthorized access. Direct interaction with 
SCP-2406-1 requires authorization by Site Command. 


Description: SCP-2406 is a mechanical automaton, 93 meters in 
height and weighing approximately 210 tonnes. Research indicates 
that SCP-2406 was not sentient and required at least six operators 
to properly function. It is hypothesized that SCP-2406 was piloted 
via 160 different valves and levers within its interior. Limbs were 
controlled through the application of pneumatics, hydraulics, and 
clockwork, and powered by a nuclear reactor located within the 
torso. 


SCP-2406 was discovered on August 7, 1985 in the Aralkum desert, 
formerly the eastern basin of the Aral Sea', during an effort to track 
the unusually high levels of radiation in the water. Initially contained 
by GRU Division "P", SCP-2406 would be transferred into 
Foundation custody following the collapse of the Soviet Union. 
Despite the location of its recovery, SCP-2406 is believed to have 
been built somewhere in the Aegean Sea. 


Most of SCP-2406 is composed of an alloy consisting of 75-80 
percent copper, 15-20 percent zinc, and smaller percentages of 
nickel, lead and iron; the admixture responsible for its bronze 
appearance. Inscribed upon the posterior of the exterior torso is the 
Aegean numeral for 9, suggesting that SCP-2406 may not be an 
entirely unique construction. However, as of to date, it remains the 


only of its kind known to the Foundation. The anterior of the exterior 
torso is engraved with a stylized hammer and anvil. 


The right arm was equipped with a nozzle attached to a 20,800 liter 
tank. Although the tank was discovered empty, chemical testing 
revealed pine resin, naphtha, quicklime, calcium phosphide, and 
sulfur within its interior.2 The left arm appears to have been torn 
from SCP-2406 and was not initially recovered with SCP-2406. See 
addendum for details. 


Human skeletal remains, six in number, have been removed from 
the interior of SCP-2406 with radiocarbon dating placing their deaths 
at cal 1200-1000 BCE (10). All were found to be attired in armor 
that, while roughly Mycenaean in design, is composed of material 
never used in ancient warfare - a lead and copper alloy with an inner 
lining composed of asbestos fabric. The helmet would have 
completely covered the head with a green, tinted glass visor over 
the face. Tubes, constructed from goat intestines, fed outside air 
directly into the mouths of the pilots. Valve #136 would have caused 
a momentary release of water into these tubes, allowing those within 
to remain hydrated while operating SCP-2406. A similar system of 
tubes attached at the crotch and were presumably used in the 
expulsion of urine. 


SCP-2406 is currently disabled (but could hypothetically be 
repaired) and displays extensive evidence of combat related 
damage. The head, torso, and left leg were discovered impaled by 
organic spines. These spines appear superficially chitinous and, 
despite showing strong structural similarities to coral, contain human 
DNA. It is believed that these objects functioned as projectiles, 
employed by an unidentified anomalous organism. Indentations 
around the torso are suggestive of constriction by a large, flexible 
and prehensile appendage. Originally thought to be caused by 
natural corrosion, SCP-2406's outer layer was damaged by a strong 
acidic substance likely associated with the previously noted 
unidentified anomalous organism. 


Physical evidence suggests that the reactor core melted through the 
posterior torso, penetrating the earth and continues to burn at more 
than 1200 °C. It is estimated to be presently located at 
approximately 820 meters beneath the surface. The reactor, when 


intact, has been hypothesized to have functioned in a manner 
similar to natural nuclear fission reactors3, deviating significantly 
from modern designs. It is possible that the creators of SCP-2406 
were aware of such phenomena and attempted to mimic the 
process. 


Several scrolls were recovered from a watertight cylinder within 
SCP-2406. Most appear to be of a religious nature and associated 
with the Followers of Mekhane - the historical precursor to the 
modern Church of the Broken God. The scrolls are written in a 
unique script derived from Mycenaean Greek. It required 10 years of 
research for Foundation linguists to decipher this system of writing.4 
These documents included a variation of The Book of Pieces, 
Chapter 12. 


+ SCROLL | 
The Colossi were constructed in Her Schema. 


The Colossi were constructed to [defend/ 
secure/contain?]. 


The Enemy: Grand Karcist lon. Betrayer of 
Man. Destroyer of Progress. Sorcerer King of 
Adytum. 


A desolate domain, a failed and fallen creation, 
built with the [bodies/flesh] of dead gods. 


Upon a throne of black ambition, the Enemy 
plots. The Enemy is not a priest. They area 
merchant. And they have sold the [world/ 
whole/totality]. 


The Colossi were constructed in Her Schema. 


The Colossi were constructed to [defend/ 
secure/contain?]. 


The Profane Tools must be 
[broken/"uncreated"]. 


Drink deep the silver blood of MEKHANE. 
May Her sacrifice not [be in vain?]. 

+ SCROLL II 
This is the final testament of Matriarch 
Eupraxia, Legates-Faithful, Servant of 
MEKHANE. 


| am not a warrior. 


But all warriors are dead. Breaking themselves 
upon the Enemy's host. 


The Enemy has set their plan into motion. The 
Sorcerer King surrounds himself with corpses. 
To fight, is to [grow/increase in number] his 
legions. 


Egypt retreats from [the world/us/contact with 
us]. 


The Hittites have fallen into [chaos/strife]. 


The Conspirators of [Crete] have sacrificed 
their own. 


The Aegear§& has fallen into barbarism. 


[The city of a thousand pillars]’ is forever lost. 
Has always been lost. 


Even the Daeva grow desperate with the 
enemy at their border. 


The center collapses - kingdoms crumble. The 
damage is done. 


The light of reason [flickers/wanes]. 


But MEKHANE sacrificed herself so that we 


Money entered: The shredded remains of a credit card linked to an 
account with 700 yen. 

SCP-261 Powered or Unpowered: Powered 

Item description: A server purchased from bank for this test 
storing information related to 's account spontaneously filled 
with the remains of smashed soft candies and a plastic package, 
Both too damaged to discern any notable features. 


Money entered: 200 yen, taken from the collection plate of a Shinto 
temple in Tokyo. 

SCP-261 Powered or Unpowered: Powered 

Item description: None dispensed. Money was returned in the coin 
return slot. 


Money entered: As previous. 

SCP-261 Powered or Unpowered: Unpowered 

Item description: None dispensed. Money returned in the coin 
return slot. Attempting to retrieve the money resulted in Dr. Williams 
receiving second-degree burns in their right index finger and thumb. 
Agent MacElroy, who originally retrieved the money, was the only 
individual able to handle the coins unharmed. The 200 yen, along 
with a check for ¥10,000,000, has since been returned to the 
temple, upon which it lost all anomalous properties. 


Money entered: A Yen coin modified to bear a QR code for 20 
Bitcoin. 

SCP-261 Powered or Unpowered: Powered 

Item Description: "Pie in the Sky", packaging in English. Contents 
were a Slice of Chocolate Oreo Cream Pie. Upon opening the 
package, the slice slowly floated towards the ceiling of the chamber. 
Dr. Chambers was able to catch it and restrain it through use of 
fishing wire. Edible, but subject reported that it tasted as if though it 
were low in sugars and other caloric content. 


might be free. 


We refuse to return to that darkness. We 
would rather die. 


But the siege at Gyaros was won. We must 
strike while the metal is hot. 


And thus, we march for Kythera - at the end of 
all things. 


We have crossed the wine-dark sea. 


We have seen villages ravaged by the Red 
Death. We have seen the dead, the dying, and 
the deathless. We cast the accursed to holy 
flame. 


We enter his desolate domain. 
And in our left hand, we carry our ANSWER. 


We cannot undo what has been done - but we 
can delay the Sarkic Dawn. 


Addendum: On December 12, 1998, the left arm of SCP-2406 was 
uncovered 32 km from its body. Evidence of impact suggest the 
object had been hurled to its location shortly after being severed 
from SCP-2406's torso. The arm is equipped with what has since 
been hypothesized to be a weapon of non-terrestrial origins and 
anomalous manufacture, design, and capabilities. Due to its singular 
nature when compared to the rest of SCP-2406, this weapon has 
been separately classified as SCP-2406-1. 


The actual purpose of SCP-2406-1 is unknown, the apparatus so 
foreign as to render it beyond current Foundation knowledge. 
SCP-2406-1, possibly due to damage, warps spacetime in its 
vicinity. Kafka counters have registered the object at a difference of 
30 humes in relation to its surrounding environment. Despite this, 
there has been no observable effect on reality. 


It has been hypothesized that the use of SCP-2406-1 would cause 


considerable damage to local reality. It remains unknown if 
SCP-2406-1 was ever used prior to the destruction of SCP-2406. 
Personnel are not to attempt activation of SCP-2406-1 unless 
authorized by Site Command. 


Footnotes 

1. Formerly one of the largest lakes in the world with an area of 
68,000 km2, it has been steadily shrinking since the 1960s after the 
rivers that fed it were diverted by Soviet irrigation projects. 

2. Speculated to be the ingredients for Greek fire, an incendiary 
weapon originally thought to have been first used ca. 672. 

3. A natural nuclear fission reactor is a uranium deposit where self- 
sustaining nuclear chain reactions have occurred. 

4. "An incidental outcome but this may lead to a translation of Linear 
A." -Dr. Judith Low 

5. "1am almost positive this word references Crete; possibly the 
Minoans in a broader sense." - Dr. Judith Low 

6. "| believe this is meant to reference all Greek states at the time." - 
Dr. Judith Low 

7."Do they mean Iram? That can't be possible though. There is no 
evidence for the existence of Iram of the Pillars nor is it referenced 
until at least the 7th century CE." - Judith Low 


« SCP-2405 | SCP-2406 | SCP-2407 » 


SCP-2407: Learned Helplessness 


Item #: SCP-2407 
Object Class: Euclid 


Special Containment Procedures: Industrialized countries should 
be monitored for SCP-2407 through groups such as the International 
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder Foundation; national and local 
mental health organizations; professional organizers; and self-help 
groups. Suspected instances of SCP-2407 should be reported to the 
Memetic Studies Department for analysis.