¢ WonderTransfer: Opens a large categorized menu of 
children's toys, all apparently manufactured by Dr. 
Wondertainment. Selecting an object from the menu causes 
the object in question to appear after a period of time, 
packaged, on a shelf in the trailer of SCP-2445. An option for 
quantity appears alongside each object, with no apparent 
upper limit. Certain categories are locked, and attempting to 
access them will cause notifications such as "Seasonal 
Product Only!" and "Not Applicable to this Ethnic Group!" to 
appear. 


¢ WonderHome: Returns SCP-2445 to a main Dr. 
Wondertainment distribution hub. Option currently locked out, 
and attempting to access this option returns a "Not so fast!" 
notification. 


Additionally, a number of apparatuses are present within the main 
cab that appear to be designed in order to protect the driver from the 
temporal and spatial anomalies incurred while operating SCP-2445. 
These include a series of intravenous syringes containing unknown 
liquid compounds, a heads-up display designed to sit directly in front 
of the driver, and a helmet covered in 20 different leads that connect 


directly to SCP-2445-2. 


Discovery Information: SCP-2445 was discovered on 11/15/2009 
near , Wisconsin, when SCP-2445 appeared to malfunction and 
come into contact with a sedan during a major winter storm. Local 
authorities were alerted when the open trailer began to 
spontaneously release instances of a previously unknown 
Wondertainment product, all of which took flight and began 
detonating around SCP-2445. 


When the number of released instances became higher than what 
could feasibly fit within the confines of the trailer, Mobile Task Force 
Alpha-13 "Meat Packers" was activated and dispatched to contain 
SCP-2445. Forty-five individuals were administered Class C 
amnestics, and a cover story of a wrecked semi carrying a shipment 
of fireworks was released to the local newspaper. 


SCP-2445 was moved to Site-81, along with the driver, who was 
officially brought into Foundation custody after a brief hospital stay. 


Interview 2445-A: The following interview took place on 
11/20/2009, shortly after the discovery and containment of 
SCP-2445, and after the driver, a Caucasian human male named 
Clarence Prince, was released from Foundation medical custody. 


[BEGIN LOG] 
Agent Roberts: Alright, let's get started. Your name, sir? 
Clarence Prince: Who's askin? 


Roberts: This will go much easier for both of us if you 
can cooperate, sir. 


Prince: | reckon | might be in a lick of trouble if | speak 
to the wrong people, sir. Who's askin? 


Roberts: I'm a member of an organization of inter- 
dimensional traffic safety officers. | need information 
about the nature of your vehicle, and the freight you ship. 


Prince: Well, I'll be damned. You ain't got a badge or 


removed. This stage typically lasts anywhere from one week to one 
month. 


In the second stage, SCP-269 will begin filtering components of the 
host's immune system from the bloodstream. Because SCP-269 
continues to filter infectious agents from the host's body, this 
generally goes unnoticed unless a blood analysis is performed. 
Stage 2 lasts anywhere from one month to six months. 


In the final stage, SCP-269 will begin to filter vital blood components 
such as red blood cells and platelets, causing an onset of acute 
anemia and thrombocytopenia. Hosts that reach Stage 3 quickly 
weaken and will invariably expire within one week unless massive 
blood transfusions are given. 


SCP-269 came to the Foundation's attention following reports that a 
civilian (one Mr. from [REDACTED]) had been cured of 
acquired immune deficiency syndrome (AIDS) and died shortly 
thereafter. SCP-269 was discovered attached to Mr. 's wrist, 
and was secured by Foundation agents after it was found that 
SCP-269 had integrated into his circulatory system. Investigation 
into the precise function and origin of SCP-269 is ongoing. 


« SCP-268 | SCP-269 | SCP-270 » 


nothin, do you? 
Agent Roberts produces standard Foundation ID tag. 


Prince: Shit, | didn't mean nothin by that earlier. Name's 
Clarence Prince, humble transport extraordinaire. 


Roberts: Mr. Prince, could you tell me about the vehicle 
you operate? 


Prince: Well, ole Hillary is a tough girl. I've been drivin' a 
long time, and | ain't seen nothin that can put it to it like 
she can. In fact, come to think of it, | ain't seen nothin like 
her at all, period. She's a whole different set of tires. 


Roberts: | assume you're referencing- 


Prince: The engine, sure. Thing looks like it came outta 
a goddamn space movie. Lots of blinkin lights and 
techno gizmos, sure. But it don't need no fixin, and it 
don't need no fuel. Hard to argue with that. 


Roberts: And the box inside? 


Prince: Oh, that's what the garage boys call the 
"Wondervision." Like a computer, you know, only it does 
things a little different. Takes some gettin used to, sure, 
but she runs like a dream once you get the nuts and 
bolts covered. 


Roberts: Can you tell me anything about your employer, 
Mr. Prince? 


Prince: You mean the doc? Can't say I've ever met him. 
| mostly just deal with the garage boys and the distro 
boys, and | don't got much to say to either. Whenever 
somethin goes wonky, | take 'er to the garage boys. 
Whenever | need to park, | take 'er to the distro boys. | 
get my routes, and then off | go. 


Roberts: How did you come to work for Dr. 
Wondertainment? 


Prince: Well, | was hauling out of Atlanta for a while. | 
guess | was real good or somethin, cause one day | 
show up and my truck is gone, and Jerry, that was my 
supervisor, tells me I'm gettin a promotion. Next thing | 
know, some goons dressed like them fancy English 
guards push me into a van and drive me to somewhere. | 
do some paperwork, get my face all pictured pretty on 
this here identification badge, and then I'm set. They pay 
the bills, | move the freight. Pays real good, too. 


Roberts: What was happening that caused your vehicle 
to malfunction? 


Prince: You know, Hill's a beast of a girl, real good on 
the open road and real good in the weather too, but you 
gotta be real careful with that WonderZoom. Garage 
boys tell me there shouldn't be nothin wrong with the 
handlin on ice when you're movin at light speed, but I'm 
gonna need to have a talk with them cause my back end 
jackknifed like | ain't never seen, and next thing you 
know I'm off in the ditch and my ass is shootin sparks. 


Roberts: Alright, thank you. That will be all, Mr. Prince. 


Prince: No problem, boss. Say, | ain't gettin ticketed for 
this, am |? 


[END LOG] 


Incident Log 2445-D: On 03/15/2012, during routine testing of 
SCP-2445, Clarence Prince was unable to log in to SCP-2445-2, 
even after repeated tries. After several attempts, a notification 
appeared on the main display of SCP-2445-2, which read as follows: 


Not so fast, Foundation goons! 


Dr. Wondertainment hopes you have enjoyed your demo 
of our newest product, WonderShipping! 


Unfortunately, your trial period has ended. No worries, 
though! We'll send somebody out as soon as we can to 


collect the product. 

Thanks again for your cooperation! 

P.S. Tell Clarence his last check is in the mail. Traction 
on ice at light speed works just fine, but trying to drift 


around vehicles in the carpool lane does not. 


« SCP-2444 | SCP-2445 | SCP-2446 » 


SCP-2446: Mobile Task Force Lambda-5 ("White 
Rabbits") 


Item #: SCP-2446 
Object Class: Keter 


Special Containment Procedures: Police, news, and civilian 
reports in the San Jose metropolitan area are to be monitored for 
SCP-2446. Reports are to be officially scrubbed from record, and 
persons involved in the discovery or documentation of SCP-2446 
are to be administered class-B amnestics. All SCP-2446-1 retrieved 
are to be transported to Site-76 for containment and analysis. 


Should any SCP-2446-1 manifest partially or entirely inside of a 
permanent structure, retrieval personnel are to be dispatched to 
remove the instance and repair affected structures. SCP-2446-1 are 
to be removed as quickly as possible to minimize chances of civilian 
discovery. 


Members of Mobile Task Force Lambda-5 (“White Rabbits”) are to 
kept unaware of the nature of SCP-2446-1 instances. 


Description: SCP-2446 designates the occasional spontaneous 
manifestation of humanoid corpses (SCP-2446-1) in a roughly 12 
kilometer area of San Jose, California. At least two instances have 
been directly observed manifesting, and have not demonstrated any 
limitations of time or location. Certain instances have been found 
partially or entirely inside of other matter. SCP-2446-1 have been 
retrieved by Foundation personnel; however, it is unknown how 
many may be unaccounted for underground or inside permanent 
infrastructure. 


All SCP-2446-1 share physical and genetic profiles with members of 
Foundation personnel, typically agents involved with Mobile Task 
Force Lambda-5 (“White Rabbits”). Multiple such duplicates have 
appeared for single agents; however, differences (namely in weight, 


build, tattoo patterns, etc.) have been noticed between instances 
and related persons (See Addendum for details). Most intact 
SCP-2446-1 manifest in an early state of putrefaction. 


SCP-2446-1 tend to appear in dress similar to Foundation-issue 
Mobile Task Force combat gear. Style and composition of such 
dress (as well as worn equipment) vary frequently in both style and 
construction. No instance has manifested in clothing identical to 
those currently in issue. SCP-2446-1 which do not manifest in MTF 
gear manifest without any clothes. Although physical factors like 
weight vary between duplicates, genetic makeup never differs 
significantly. 


Item # Circumstance of Description 
Recovery 
Alley near Quimby Caucasian male, 1.9m 
SCP-2446-A1 Rd.; partially tall, 78 kg weight. 
manifested around Dressed in Foundation 
refuse. issue combat clothes, 


with the exception of 
any armor or 
equipment. Appeared 
to have suffered 
severe compression. 
Possessed numerous 
extreme bone 
fractures, collapsed 
organs, and 
lacerations, abrasions, 
and contusions on 
skin. Wore tags 
labeled “A-5: Alex 
Henderson”. Genetic 
and physical profile 
match Foundation 
agent Alex A. 
Henderson, currently 
assigned to MTF 
Lambda-5. 


SCP-2446-B1 


SCP-2446-E1 


SCP-2446-B2 


Alum Rock Park, 


Caucasian male, 1.9m 


beneath stone bridge; tall, 71 kg weight. 


manifested into dirt, 
rocks, and plant 
debris. 


Dressed in Foundation 
issue combat armor. 
Implanted with 
subdermal GPS 
tracking chip on right 
side of neck, 
unmarked. Possessed 
12 7.62x39mm 
gunshot wounds on 
head, torso, and arms. 
Left side appeared to 
have suffered minor 
burn and shrapnel 
damage. Text 
“A10441 Wilder” 
tattooed on left 
shoulder blade. 
Genetic and physical 
profile match 
Foundation agent 
Jacob H. Wilder, 
currently assigned to 
MTF Lambda-5. 


Empty classroom, SanHispanic Male, 2m tall, 
Jose State University, 71 kg weight. Stripped 


Building 7. 


Lake Cunningham 


nude. Several 
ballpoint pens 
appeared to have 
been manifested 
internally; numerous 
internal organ ruptures 
resulted. Genetic and 
physical profile match 
Foundation Agent 
Patrick Carter, 
currently assigned to 
MTF Lambda-5. 
Body and all 


SCP-2446-D3 


SCP-2446-B4 


Park; manifested into 
lake Cunningham. All 
solid parts were 
liquified. 


Coyote Creek at 


equipment liquified, 
likely resultant of its 
in-water manifestation. 
Retrieved DNA found 
to match SCP-2446- 
B1 and Foundation 
agent Jacob H. 
Wilder. Large 
quantities of metal and 
SCP-148 were found 
in water following 
manifestation. 
Hispanic female, 1.8m 


Roosevelt Park. Lowertall, 63 kg weight. 


legs, right forearm, 


Dressed in 


and front face liquified, Foundation-issue full 


front upper-torso 
manifested into rocks 
and topsoil. 


Guadalupe River 
Park. Retrieved alive. 
[REDACTED] 


Addendum: Research Report 2446.21 
Due in part to recent developments in reality-measuring technology, 
research and retrieval teams have initiated investigations into 
potential origins of SCP-2446. Although correlation between 
recorded Hume deficiencies and SCP-2446 have not been 
confirmed, certain readings fall outside of acceptable parameters for 
operation. Based on humological maps of the area, spatial 


combat armor, fully- 
lined with SCP-148, 
partially damaged. 
Two 9mm gunshot 
wounds on head. 
Genetic and physical 
profile identical to 
SCP-2446-D1, -D2, 
and Foundation agent 
Melissa King. 

[DATA EXPUNGED] 
Genetic and physical 
profile match 
SCP-2446-B1, -B2, 
and Foundation agent 
Jacob H. Wilder. 


disturbances most likely originate from an apartment complex 
located at 2525 N Waterworks St. Direct investigation is 
forthcoming. 


« SCP-2445 | SCP-2446 | SCP-2447 » 


SCP-2446-B4 Interview 


Foreword: On //  aninstance of SCP-2446-1 
manifested suffering from a near fatal aortic aneurysm. 
Following extensive medical intervention the instance 
was revived, and prepared for an interview in an attempt 
to determine the source of SCP-2446. Due to the 
instances failing health, and also signs suggesting 
radioactive decay, the instance was confined to an 
isolation chamber and monitored remotely by medical 
personnel and para-reality hazards specialists while 
interview was conducted via standard teleconference 
equipment. 


Interviewed: SCP-2446-B4, Instance resembles Jacob 
H. Wilder? 


Interviewer: Dr.L N 
<Begin Log> 
SCP-2446-B4: Where am |? 


N_: You're at Site- , in the medical ward. I'm here to 
debrief you. To begin with, what is your name. 


SCP-2446-B4: Col. Jacob Wilder, does that mean I'm 
out... Am | safe? 


SCP-2446-B4:[shouting] This is another trap, isn't it?! 
Tell me you bastards! 


N_ : Col. Wilder, please remain calm, sedation in your 
current state could be highly detrimental to your health. 


SCP-2446-B4: Like you ever cared about my health! 
What are you going to do, vivisect me? That would be 


ironic, wouldn't it? You cutting me up? 
N_ : Please calm down Col. Wilder, or | will sedate you. 
[SCP-2446-B4 is sedated for debrief] 


N — : Now then, we would like to know what happened 
to you and your team? 


SCP-2446-B4: They're probably dead, to be completely 
honest. We should never have followed through on the 
plan. 


N_ : Ah, what is this plan you speak of? 


SCP-2446-B4: We thought we could stop the bodies 
falling into our world. I'm assuming that I'm somewhere 
else if you don't already know that. 


N __ :1| take it the situation was bad? 


SCP-2446-B4: Thirteen separate incidents of major 
public manifestation, one where a four ton mass of what 
looked like knightsmanifested on live television. In the 
end, we found a corpse with advanced enough tech, and 
after some experimentation, we found where it came 
from. Once we had done that it was a simple matter to 
modify our existing reality stabilization tech to get us 
there. 


N — : Where exactly was the point of origin? 


SCP-2446-B4: Judging from medical tech in this room, 
that could be difficult to explain. How advanced is this 
timeline? Do you at least have Scranton tech, or at least 
para-tech weapons programs, can you create anti-reality 
weapons? 


N_ : I'm not sure | would have clearance to know if we 
did, and if | did know | wouldn't be able to tell you. 


SCP-270: Secluded Telephone 


Item #: SCP-270 
Object Class: Euclid 


Special Containment Procedures: Due to SCP-270’s immovable 
nature, a structure has been built around it that outwardly appears to 
be a large farmhouse, henceforth called Outpost Delta. Outpost 
Delta is to be staffed with a minimum of _ trained personnel. 


Extensive records of SCP-270’s ciphers are kept at Site-11. 
Extensive records of decoded ciphers are available in - ,