History & Associated Parties: In truth, Akai- 
no-Ren possesses a rather mediocre lineage 
when compared to that of more decorative 
luxury long-tailed fighter-fish. His known 
ancestors were not well-sought in the fish 
associate pool he originated from, and there are 
no records of his exact parentage. Furthermore, 
his ragged-looking crowntail'® attire is not held 


in as much esteem as the elegant fan-shaped 
half-moon, and the red coloration is considered 
overwhelmingly common. This resulted in his 
being passed by time and again by individuals 
seeking water-affinity companions. 


However, none of these facts deterred the Lord 
Wolke, who was impressed with Akai-no-Ren's 
ferocity and suitability for elemental modification, 
unaffected by selective breeding for appearance. 


Suitors marrying into the mantis courts are 
expected to spend at least five days picking out 
the wedding gift for their intended, one day for 
each eye a mantis has: for observing, 
discerning, appraising, deciding, and striking. 
Lord Wolke examined each of the warrior fish in 
the communal adoption territories, and found 
himself returning each subsequent day to visit 
the little red misfit fish. The Companion Pool of 
Divine Wisdom was happy to facilitate the 
adoption. 


Approach: The Lady Ren is thus far the only 
individual Akai-no-Ren remains steadfastly loyal 
to. While he can be placated with food, he will 
often attempt to chase away any strangers he 
encounters. It is recommended to speak with 
Lady Ren before approaching the fish. 


As a lesser"! fishkin, Akai-no-Ren does not 
trouble himself with many of the intricacies of 
court etiquette. Nevertheless, he will allow 
insectkin children to pet him on the head if his 
master introduces them first. 


Observations & Stories 


"| have no complaints. The fish even joined in on 
the ceremonial wedding dance of our orchid lady 
mantids after the newlyweds took their vows and 
exchanged gifts. Akai-san was trained well in our 
customs. No table manners, but few mantids 
have those, even in the higher courts." 
~Hanachirusato 


"What better gift for the duelist Mistress of the 
Red Knives, than a fiery red fighting fish that 
fears nothing? | admit to not having high hopes 
for the match, as the scorpionkin seems a little 
soft-shelled to me... but he does seem to 
understand the Lady Zakuro well. The two have 
decided to maintain Zakuro's abode in the 
mountains, and while the lady mantis crafts her 
swords and staves, the scorpion-husband 
arranges the clouds on commission. | have 
heard that she brings him teas from her mantid 
court, and he brings her books from his family's 
library, tomes of incantations and archaic spells 
that she incorporates into her work, grateful 
because though she has endless memory for 
metals and wood, she dislikes memorizing the 
long strings of guarding wards that are used to 
imbue enchantments. But he, a cloud-trimmer 
who has written countless sigils into the skies, 
knows thousands of these protective invocations 
by heart, and so they work together to produce 
wondrous apparatuses. ...what? You wanted to 
know more about the fish? | wouldn't know. It's 
rather... temperamental, from what | hear." 
~Miotsukushi 


"| thought little Red Lotus fish was simply 
darling. Ren-chan's groom even took special 
pains to have the fish's sky-armor commissioned 
to match hers. For you see, all high mantid court 
weddings involving any lady mantiskin require 
that the bride wear her best set of armor. 


Assassinations went down rather a lot following 
the implementation of that custom, heaven 
knows. And everyone at Ren-chan's wedding 
was terrified of the fish when he grew fifteen 
times in size and consumed the entire waterkin- 
delicacy section of the banquet table. Perhaps | 
ought to consider hiring him out for future court 
functions." ~Suetsumuhana-Hime 


"Charming, when well-fed. My dear brother 
asked me to look after the fish while he and his 
new wife went off on their honeymoon over the 
Mountain of Swords, to climb the clouds of the 
most dangerous peak!2:13,14 while they were 
still young. The little fish was rather restless but 
seemed to calm down around mealtimes. | may 
look into bringing one of his kin into the 
household, to keep an eye on my son." ~Zirrus 
Wolke 


"The red fish is a cool gift and | want one | like 
visiting him when my mamma brings me to see 
uncle Grau he says to be careful with Ack-eye 
but | don't need to worry because we are good 
friends! He likes to chase socks | wave in front of 
him with my tail but he is smart and doesn't bite 
the stinger part. Aphid-kittens are okay they 
make honeydew my mamma has one but any 
beekin can make honey my friends say so. And 
no aphid-kitten can wear armor. My uncle is the 
coolest and my new auntie is cooler than he is 
because she makes swords and one day when 
I'm old enough and my pincers grow in she will 
teach me about swords so | guess that makes 
her the coolest but the fish is my favorite so 
maybe he is the coolest coolest [remaining 
account trimmed for brevity]" ~ Gewitter Wolke15 


Doubt 


There were many members of the mantid court 
who were shocked with the unromantic gesture 
of presenting a bride with an angry warrior fish 
for a wedding gift. Lady Zakuro did not attempt 
to convince them to act otherwise, and made 
frequent visits to her family in the court to show 
off Akai-no-Ren hovering diligently at her 
shoulder. Her most recent calling resulted in two 
injuries and fifteen terrified aphid-kittens. 


| agree that it was an unromantic pick. Surely he 
could have gotten her something nicer-looking? 
Perhaps for the bedchamber and not the 
battlefield? —Tanzer 


Tanzer, you know absolutely nothing about 
romance. | trust Grau on this one. The fish can 
protect them both should the worst come, and 
that reassures me, and that is enough for me. — 
Schreien W. 


| know plenty. | have seven sisters. And | am 
certain that none of them would want a battle 
fish at their wedding as a decoration, let alone 
for a handpicked marriage gift. —Tanzer 


Three of your sisters hate you, one of them 
permanently left the family a decade ago, one of 
them became a nun, and the rest you haven't 
spoken to at length since childhood. Besides, 
the fish is prettier than all of them, so maybe 
you're just bitter. —Schreien W. 


| still think fish are unromantic. They smell. — 
Tanzer 


| can't believe they invited you to the wedding. 
—Schreien W. 


Experiment Log 713 


Approved by O5- 
Project Head: Dr. 


[DATA REDACTED] 


Test 12 

Date: / /20 

Subject: Image-editing software 

Procedure: Software initialized. New document opened. "Paint" 
command selected, brush size altered to 50 pixels, and color 
changed to #FFO000. Cursor moved offscreen and click-and- 
dragged over blank white wall. Software exited. Software 
reinitialized. 

Results: Upon selection of "Paint" command, cursor became an 
open 50-px-wide circle (approx. 3 cm offscreen). Dragging resulted 
in a 38cm x 20 cm line of the appropriate shade of red appearing on 
the wall. Line's composition resembled that of the word processor's 
type. Line disappeared upon exiting program and did not reappear 
upon program restart. It is hypothesized that the image editor, like 
the word processor, does not retain data between program 
instances unless saved to the hard drive. 


Test 13 

Date: / /20 

Subject: Image-editing software 

Procedure: As Test 12, except that current image saved to disk 
before exiting program and opened again upon reinitializing. 
Results: Red streak disappeared upon closing program and 
reappeared upon opening. 


Test 14 
Date: / /20 
Subject: Image-editing software 


1. He bitfivelast | recall. My sister-in-law was so proud. | 
never should have encouraged my brother's courting her. 
~Schreien W. 

2. But your big family gatherings are going to be so much 
fun now! Remember to invite me and our other friends! 
~Tanzer 

3. | dislike these things. They make me sneeze. ~Grauen 
Wolke 

4. My brotherstillrefuses to call her "Ren" unless they're 
off alone by themselves. It's always "my lady" or "lady 
master". Ren is her given name, for sickle's sake. Grau is 
so sweet on her you could make candy from his face. 
~Schreien W. 

5. There's such thing as non-aggressive flaring in these 
warrior fish? ~Tanzer 

6. Yes. Showing off. You do it all the time when you put 
on fancy clothes and dance at the harvest gatherings. 
~Schreien W. 

7. It is said that the sky-armor forged by cloud-scorpions 
brought about a series of treaties that ushered ina 
thousand years of peace for the insectkin who dwelt in 
the skies, who had been beset by birdkin. When 
defending a loved one, scorpionkin knights could grow up 
to one-hundred times their size with the armor. ~W.S. 

8. ...S0, feasibly, one could ride this fish into battle?! 
~Schreien W. 

9. Unless he's hungry. But that's the only time he likes 
me, if | have food. ~Grauen Wolke 

10. He's also actually kind of small compared to the 
fighting fish with fancy billowy tails. But then, he makes 
full use of his armor's size changing enchantment so | 
suppose it really doesn't matter... ~W.S. 

11. That is, not "less" meaning lacking, but as opposed to 
"greater" individuals, who have transcended their first 
form and may take on additional shapes. Many fishkin 
are content with their current form, though those who 
aspire to politics often choose to take on shapes that 
enable them to handle a stylus. ~W.S. 

12. Is that a euphemism?! ~Tanzer 

13. No. Lady Ren has a noblemantid's wings, and Grau 


is a cloud-walker. What did you think they were doing on 
the mountain? 

14. Well, think it was a euphemism. ~Schreien W. 

15. Spinner'steeththis child speaks fast. | have eight 
appendages, six of which | can write with. | never thought 
I'd see the day where all of them would be tired from one 
interview. ~W.S. 


Mr. Doggo 


Mr. Doggo 


Canis ex Machina, Hound of the Memelords', Spirited 
Canine 


Conspectus 


Mr. Doggo is a small doggo of the Shiba Inu 
breed, possessing a collar that appears to be 
irremovable, which reads 'Mr. Doggo, by 
Gamers Against Weed2'. Mr. Doggo, as he 
wishes to be called, behaves for the most part in 
a manner similar to the average domesticated 
doggo. However, Mr. Doggo has several magical 
properties that only make themselves known at 
certain times. This includes an effect on 
information when one is aware of his existence, 
and his inability to vocalize in a manner normal 
to others of his species34. 


Illustration 


Mr. Doggo playing in the yard, taken and visually 
enhanced by Mr. Doggo's current custodian. 


Knowledge 


Traits: Mr. Doggo, when barking, sounds like a 
human vocalizing the word '‘Bork®". In addition, 
Mr. Doggo is known to alter text referring to 
doggos when one is aware of his existence, 
replacing the word 'doggo' with 'doggo' when he 
is within a short distance of any documents.® 
While this effect is not permanent, it tends to last 
for roughly a week after first becoming aware of 
Mr. Doggo, and can be reset by encountering 
him in any way after it has ended. As Mr. Doggo 
is a doggo, and therefore unable to effectively 
communicate with us, it is not known if this is of 
his own volition, or merely a by-product of his 
enchantment. Mr. Doggo is friendly, and 
currently resides in his own private doggohouse 
with one of our members’. In the interest of their 
protection, this member's identity will remain 
secret, so as not to draw attention from other 
groups. 


Nature: Mr. Doggo, for the most part, acts as if 
he were a normal doggo®. However, Mr. Doggo 
does display an above average intelligence, 
understanding several phrases, and showing 
knowledge of their meaning. This includes 
'Gamers Against Weed'91011, to which Mr. 
Doggo generally responds with hostility!213. Mr. 
Doggo has occasionally been seen to attempt to 
remove his collar, though his efforts have been 
met with failure, as the collar seems to be 
unable to be removed from him. If, as some 
theorize, Mr. Doggo is indeed a spirit trapped 
within a body he finds unfitting, this may be a 
sign that he wishes to be released of his past 
associations and present form141516, 


History & Associated Parties: Mr. Doggo is 


believed to have been created by a group of 
merrymakers, thought to be a lost sect of the 
anartists, calling themselves 'Gamers Against 
Weed’, which is believed to be an esoteric joke 
of some sort. As these merrymakers!71819 have 
been known to create 'Misters' mocking the ones 
created by the inventor known as 'Dr. 
Wondertainment’, this is most likely the case29. 
Mr. Doggo was brought to the attention of the 
Serpent's Hand after several members received 
a notice that there was 'a Doggo looking for a 
good home' from an unidentified person going 
by the name of 'jockjamsvol6'2!. Coordinates 
listed on this notice led Mr. Doggo's current 
custodian to a doggo pound in Denver, 
Colorado, which had detained Mr. Doggo a week 
prior, and was beginning to become weary of Mr. 
Doggo's magical effects. Mr. Doggo was 
adopted, and currently resides with a member of 
the Serpent's Hand. 


Approach:22 Mr. Doggo is to be approached as 
if he were a normal doggo. With respect, and 
caution. Allow him time to become used to your 
presence, and make no movements that would 
lead him to become suspicious or wary of your 
intentions. Treats containing meat are very 
helpful when becoming acquainted with Mr. 
Doggo. Offerings of new toys such as rubber 
balls or squeaky animals are also accepted. Mr. 
Doggo responds to the name 'Mr. Doggo', but 
has warmed up to several affectionate 
nicknames, and will likely respond to anything 
that contains 'Doggo' or 'Mr.'23, 


Other Detail: For the time being, Mr. Doggo is 
disallowed from entering the library proper 
without powerful warding spells to suppress his 
text altering effect. When entering the library, Mr. 
Doggo's custodian must have a waste disposal 


bag with them at all times, for the sake of the 
other inhabitants of the library2425, and his time 
there should be kept to a minimum. 


Observations & Stories 


When first encountered by his current custodian, 
a small document was discovered to have been 

tucked under Mr. Doggo's collar. The document 

has been reproduced here. 


Holy h*ck! You've just found yourself 
an ultra rare Mr. Doggo by Doggos 
Against Catnip! Give that doggo a 
bone! What the actual fuck is an Dr. 
Wondertainment? 


This Mr. Doggo is a prototype model 
for our upcoming series of 'Misters 
Against Weed'! Please take care of 
him, he is a good doggo after all! Find 
all of our upcoming Misters and 
become Mr. Gamer! 


Anyone wishing to meet Mr. Doggo for 
themselves, please private message either H. or 
M., and they'll refer you to his custodian. Be 
prepared to deal with the side effects though! 


Doubt 


As little is known of the merrymakers who 
created him, some have questioned the nature 
of Mr. Doggo, bringing into debate whether or 
not he can be considered a doggo. The idea that 


the being known as Mr. Doggo may in fact be a 
spirit led to believe it is a doggo may also come 
with unfortunate implications. Did this spirit 
willingly submit to the merrymakers? Or was it 
coerced through force? 


Some of you are blowing this out of proportion. 
All this demonstrates is that the merrymakers 
have found power of their own. To enforce our 
own morals onto them6 is no different than the 
Jailers saying that beings developing their own 
power are required to be contained. ~ Hugin