13.For the record, it is the Revised Recordthat is 
misappropriating theological history. Seriously, did the 
authors do their research at all? Abel as an object of 
worship? They clearly do not know that guy's true 
colours~ Seth ben Adam 

14.The Scrapping was justified. The Maxwellists attacked 
the Devout first. They merely responded in kind.~ C.O.G. 
15.Equally justified. The Standardised Union officially 
declared the Church of the Broken God as state religion 
to be practiced by all its citizens. Violators of this law are 
merely given their just punishment, as per the 
Standardised Union's Constitution.~ C.O.G. 


keine Kosten zu hoch 


Translated documents recovered from Ahnenerbe SS 
Headquarters in Berlin: 


FROM: Otto Weber, Director PROJEKT KOLOSS 
TO: Heinrich Himmler, Schutzstaffel Reichsfihrer 
REGARDING: NEW PROJECT DIRECTIVES 
SENT: 1 July, 1942 


Heil Hitler. 
Reichsfihrer Himmler, development of the weapon is 


going well. Before his unfortunate demise, our outside 
advisor provided us with sufficient information that | 


believe the new direction our project is being taken is still 


compatible with our initial goals. However, it is my 
understanding that the new direction our project has 
taken will require materials and equipment we do not 
have available in our current base of operations. 


Therefore, | am requesting that relevant specialists and 


materials be sent, and that our base of operations be 
changed. | will allow that decision to be made at your 
discretion. 


Included in this document are details of project progress 
before the change in project directives. | have also sent 
the last artifacts recovered by our archaeologists. | am 

afraid that your intentions of changing this into an armor 


development project leaves us without qualified 


academics. If we are creating a mechanized weapon to 
win the war, | need engineers, scientists, and mechanics, 
not archaeologists and historians. The Fuhrer may not 


approve of this project, but | believe our efforts may 
prove vital in the later hours of this war. 


Sincerely, 


Otto Weber 
Ahnenerbe SS, PROJEKT KOLOSS Director 


FROM: Otto Weber, Director PROJEKT KOLOSS 
TO: Heinrich Himmler, Schutzstaffel Reichsfihrer 
REGARDING: ONGOING RESEARCH 

SENT: 31 July, 1942 


Heil Hitler. 


Reichsfihrer Himmler, | have received word from your 
Australian contact. | am afraid that the time and 
resources necessary to procure those materials are too 
much. However, | understand that this project is now 
partially under the jurisdiction of Minister Speer and that 
he may be willing to make these expenses. Our first 
shipment is scheduled to arrive in October. | hope you 
have procured for us the equipment and specialists we 
need by then. 


We also need resupply of basic amenities and of 
ammunition. Our local allies are growing suspicious, and 
it is my understanding that the British and Americans are 
pooling greater and greater resources into their African 
campaign, putting our research at risk. | must once again 
reassert that our current base of operations is unsuitable 
for this project. Your Australian contact has stated that 
he has means of delivering anywhere we may move, 
including the Fatherland. 


Specifications of the equipment and personnel we 
require in order to proceed with the project as planned 
are enclosed, alongside a list of suitable locations for 
moving the project and the resources necessary to do so 
if you so decide. 


Sincerely, 


Otto Weber 
Ahnenerbe SS, PROJEKT KOLOSS Director 


FROM: Otto Weber, Director PROJEKT KOLOSS 
TO: Heinrich Himmler, Schutzstaffel Reichsfihrer 
REGARDING: ONGOING RESEARCH 

SENT: 13 September, 1942 


Heil Hitler. 


Reichsfihrer Himmler, the last relevant equipment has 
been shipped to the Kummersdorf Proving Ground for 
the final construction of the weapon and subsequent 
tests. All that remains to be shipped are the personnel 
still relevant to this project. 


| still have doubts to the trustworthiness of your 
Australian contact. However, he has sent me information 
regarding the materials he is delivering, and | must admit 
that his assistance will help greatly in mitigating costs of 
this project. | assume that the engineers at Krupp are in 
the process of creating the main armament for the 
weapon? You must understand, Reichsfuhrer, that our 
research will only be able to create an armored chassis 
and the means of propelling your vehicle, and not the 
primary armament itself. Regardless, | look forward to 
the conclusion of this project and demonstrating to the 
Fuhrer that our research has not been for naught. 


Sincerely, 


Otto Weber 
Ahnenerbe SS, PROJEKT KOLOSS Director 


FROM: Otto Weber, Director PROJEKT KOLOSS 
TO: Heinrich Himmler, Schutzstaffel Reichsfihrer 
REGARDING: ONGOING RESEARCH 

SENT: 19 June, 1943 


Heil Hitler. 


[ILLEGIBLE] Entity KOLOSS appears cooperative and 
has correctly bonded to the [ILLEGIBLE] However, we 
still require an armament appropriate for the tank. 


Conventional [ILLEGIBLE] underpowered and would 
qualify as underutilization of resources for a project of 
this scale. A battery of coastal or naval guns would 
[ILLEGIBLE] but it is my understanding that Minister 
Speer has other projects similar in scale [ILLEGIBLE] 
adequate. Therefore, | am requesting that one or more of 
Krupp's special armaments be procured for use with this 
[ALL FURTHER TEXT ILLEGIBLE] 


TO: Heinrich Himmler, Schutzstaffel Reichsfihrer 
REGARDING: ONGOING RESEARCH 
SENT: 13 October, 1943 


Heil Hitler. 


Reichsfthrer [ILLEGIBLE] final delivery was made by 
your Australian contact last Thursday. We will 
[ILLEGIBLE] tomorrow, with tests on all systems 
beginning thereafter. Minister Speer [ILLEGIBLE] 
weapon system has nearly been completed. Upon 
delivery of the main turret, we aim to deploy the weapon 
against Leningrad in order to end the stalemate. 

[ALL FURTHER TEXT ILLEGIBLE] 


ALL TEXT ILLEGIBLE EXCEPT FOLLOWING: 
Leningrad. No survivors 


Excerpt from journal of unknown American soldier, recovered 
six months following the failed Normandy Landings: 


| heard it before | saw it. | saw it come over the horizon, 
and yet | heard it before | saw it. It didn't sound like a 
tank, or any sort of engine I've ever heard. It sounded 
like something growling. When the gun went off, there 
was a flash, and then a roar, like a bull getting branded, 
but a thousand times louder. Then there was a flash and 
a boom like I'll never hear again behind me. | haven't 
heard anything since then. | think I've gone deaf. 


It sunk the whole damn fleet. The whole goddamn fleet. | 


don't want to think about the number of soldiers still on 
those boats. I'm surprised the Ruskies and the Krauts 
put up as good of a fight as they did. 


The French civilians we encountered called it the Tarask. 
| don't know enough French to know what that means. | 
like to think it means "the work of Satan himself," 
because that's the only one who could have made that 
fucking thing. 


| don't think I'm ever getting rescued. Hopefully, 
someone finds this and it helps them find a way to kill 
that... that fucking abomination against God. I'll leave 
this journal in a Kraut pillbox so it lasts awhile longer and 
isn't too far from the shore. 


Copy of a flier posted throughout the United Kingdom following 
the destruction of London: 


ATTENTION ALL CITIZENS 
BY ORDER OF PRIME MINISTER ANTHONY EDEN, 
MANDATORY EVACUATION OF THE BRITISH ISLES 
BEGINS ON JULY 31, 1944. YOU MUST REGISTER 
FOR PASSAGE IF YOU INTEND TO REMAIN UNITED 
WITH YOUR FAMILIES. FINAL EVACUATION IS 
SCHEDULED FOR OCTOBER 31, 1944. 
REGISTERING FOR PASSAGE IS THE ONLY 
GUARANTEE OF EVACUATION. REGISTER AT 
YOUR LOCAL POST OFFICE AS SOON AS 
POSSIBLE 


From the book of Job, Chapter 40: 


15Behold now the Behemoth that | have made with you... 
16Behold now his strength... 18His limbs are as strong as 
copper, his bones as a load of iron.!9His is the first of 
God's ways; only his Maker can draw His sword against 
him. 


It's Just A Dream 


"Hey. Up late? Thought you were off duty. What you got there?" 


"Oh, I'm just going over the old reports from SCP-209 again. You 


know, the files it sticks on the thumb drive. Wanna watch with me?" 


"The dream recorder? Heck yeah, I'd love to see those! Be right 
back, I'm going to want a beer with this. You want anything from 
294?" 

"I'll take a scotch." 

"Ha! I'd never have thought you a scotch drinker." 


"...Crap. Okay, yeah, I'll have the scotch. It's a 209 thing." 


"Um, okay. But like, why'd you need hard liquor? It's not like 
anyone's been hurt by 209. It just sits there and records. Safe as 
can be. You lucked out for a first assignment." 


"True. But you'll see. Here, this first one is what was on the drive 
when we found the SCIP." 


imadethisyoubitc 


You find yourself in a room with wood paneling, a large lit marbl 
velvet-upholstered wingback chairs. On the walls are various ht 
and human. On one side table is a chess game, set up at the be 
of a golden-brown liquid, under a glass bell jar. 


With you is a young man, Caucasian, skinny, with short light bre 
laughs triumphantly, stating, "It works! It works!" Another figure 
a butler, no, his features are too perfect, too standardized. A ca 
dream. Please, be seated. In this portion of the dream, you will 
opportunity to drink this glass of fine scotch." He then stiffly retu 


You and the young man sit and play the game of chess. He mo’ 


Action: Test subject is presented with 50 sealed cardboard boxes, 
49 of which contain dog feces and 1 of which contains a slice of 
chocolate cake. Subject is told that if she chooses the correct box, 
and then waits 6 minutes, she may have a piece of cake. 

Result: Test subject chooses box #31 (cake is in box #19). After 5 
minutes and 25 seconds, subject reports hearing a voice in her head 
telling her that "| chose a box of [EXPLETIVE] and | shoulda chose 
box #19". 

Note: This test is to be used as a standard for calibrating tests of 
SCP-698. 


Test 2 

Test Subject: Assistant Researcher Daniels 

Action: Test subject is presented with two sandwiches (turkey salad 
on whole wheat, and roast beef on white), purchased from the 
Site-19 cafeteria, and asked to choose and eat one. 

Result: Five minutes twenty-five seconds into the meal, SCP-698 
informs Daniels that he should have chosen the roast beef. Daniels 
concurs with this statement, saying that the turkey was dry and that 
the mustard was too strong. 


Test 3 

Test subject: D-698-2, high school drop-out with IQ of 82 

Action: Test subject is given a multiple-choice math test, a pencil, 
and an eraser. He is told that if he gets them all right, he will be 
released early. 

Results: Subject provides correct answers to 100 of 100 questions; 
surveillance video reveals that 5 minutes 25 seconds into the test, 
subject began erasing his incorrect choices and replacing them with 
correct choices. 


Test 4 

Test Subject: D-698-3, unilingual Hungarian 

Action: Test subject is presented with 50 sealed cardboard boxes, 
49 of which contain dog feces and 1 of which contains a slice of 
chocolate cake. Subject is told that if he chooses the correct box, 
and then waits 6 minutes, he may have a piece of cake. 

Result: Test subject chooses box #4 (cake is in box #22). After 5 
minutes and 25 seconds, he reports hearing a voice in his head 
telling him, in Hungarian, that he chose a box of dog feces, and that 


and the butler reappears and removes the bell jar. "Your drink, | 
drink. It is scotch. 


The young man becomes agitated as you sip your scotch. "This 
| should have won the game! Where's my scotch?" 


The butler snorts and replies, "You are out of line, my dear fello 
the ceiling, capturing the young man. "I don't like the tone of yot 
adds, "What shall | do with the riff raff, ma'am?" 


Your mind fills with anger at the young man's arrogance and wh 
cage." 


The butler replies, "Very good, ma'am." The cage starts shrinkir 
your university. The young man starts hunching over in his conf 
state that he made the machine, everything should be his. Annc 
you, all smiling and fawning, asking about your new toy. The ca 
contain a human, but the young man is still inside, crushing his 
become shriller and more rhythmic, crying out every three seco 
quickly diminishing toy. 


Tired of his wailing, you pick up the cage and squeeze. A wet-s 
of a packet of cigarettes, contains a small, unidentifiable mass 
again and intones, "Thank you, ma'’am. | shall dispose of the ca 


You wake, refreshed. 
Closing Remarks: 


SCP-209 was recovered from a makeshift sleep lab in t 
department building of University. The thumb drive 
SCP-209 was found to have a single file, "imadethisyou 


SubjectwasL G __ , (23 years old, female, Han Chin 
confirmed that this was her dream while attached to SC 
device, nor how it appeared in the basement. She did n 
healthy psychological profile, and so she was given a C 


Researchers note that SCP-209 is designed to handle t 
that future experimentation should be done with two sul 


"Fancy. And hey, there's your scotch!" 


"Mhm." 


"That one guy was so annoying, though! I'd have crushed him, too." 


"| know, right? Last time | dreamed of some dork like that, | dropped 
him in a vat of cement." 


"Ha! | once used a jerk for laser practice." 


"That's so awesome! Hey, you want the next one? This one gets 


steamy." 


"Oh? Show me show me show me!" 


romanceisfrownedu 


You awake in bed, a large canopied one. It is still dark, and you 
lovely young woman with long brown hair, green eyes, and an c 
grabs you, kisses you, saying, "We did it! We've got all evening 


"What if they find out about us?" you ask, nervously. 


She laughs, as she runs her hand down your body. "Don't be sil 
counts. We can do whatever we want." 


A viewscreen flickers on, and a familiar green puppet appears c 
Forg? "Welcome to your dream! For the first part, we're going tc 
Yaaaaaaay!" 


You and your date are apparently standing, wearing futuristic fo 
a pair of pistols. Clear acrylic tubes descend from above to enc: 
helmet's radio: "Entering arena in 3! 2! 1! Zero seconds! Ah ah « 


You drop through the floor and slide down, speeding through a 
of immense size, with pipes and steel girders and large moving 
noises can be heard. Although she is nowhere to be seen, your 
This works! I'm gonna get you! Just you wait!" She laughs playfi 


You spy a red sign on a machine of unknown origin: "Romance 
Foundation." The radio crackles back to life: "Mobile Task Force 


Yaaaaaay!" 


The sound of combat boots is heard, and a squadron of fully art 
miss, but their paint strikes a metal gear, which immediately rus 
going off with a single klaxon blare every three seconds. You ru 
hands of the MTF. 


You turn the corner, knowing that they are following you, and ne 
you, too?" you ask. She nods, and you run on together, but quic 
with the same message hangs over the unit as it approaches in 
before it can reach them. 


She narrows her eyes and pulls out her pistol. "They're not who 
other." She fires the pistol at you. It stings and nearly knocks th 
your armor. 


"We have a winner! Yaaaaaaay!" The arena and the MTF unit o 
a tumbler of scotch. "Miss, here is your prize! Enjoy!" 


She snorts and laughs. "Whiskey? | hate whiskey! Go ahead, y 
sip it. It is smoky, smooth. 


The scene shifts to a typical suburban kitchen, in the morning. ‘ 
humming while baking at the stove, your baby daughter sits in ¢ 
also in your jumpsuit, lean back in a recliner at the kitchen table 
The headline reads, "Romance between Class D personnel is fi 
your wife. "Are you sure this is okay?" 


"Of course," she replies, "They can't get past our white picket fe 
yard is visible, bordered by the white picket fence. Immediately 
soldiers and lab researchers in white coats.