Result: The video begins without the usual opening sequence. 
SCP-2835-1 addresses the viewer directly, sobbing and visibly 
intoxicated, and yelling "Naismith, you goddamn snitching swiss 
cheese eating whore!" and variations thereof. A poorly-drawn 
SCP-3922-A instance in the background approaches, saying "Let's 
go, Paddy. We're only trying to help." SCP-2835-1 attempts suicide 


with a shotgun blast to the face, only to become mildly dazed, with 
stars circling his head. Video ends. 

Note: Testing of SCP-2835 afterward, without the influence of 
SCP-3922, consisted of SCP-2835-1 spending the entirety of the 
video lamenting its inability to "people die, not just cartoon die." 


Subject: Nineteen Eighty-Four (1984), R 

Interference Point: Beginning 

Result: The film is extended to be 18 hours long, with a large army 
of SCP-3922-A invading and occupying Airstrip One. At 17 hours, all 
the Inner Party members, including Big Brother, are executed by 
SCP-3922-A instances via gunfire. An SCP-3922-A instance holds a 
speech in Victory Square, where they announce the occupation of 
the British Isles and the return of liberty and justice to the people of 
Great Britain and Ireland. They then prepare to invade the rest of the 
world; a montage of SCP-3922-A instances invade the rest of 
Oceania, Eurasia, and Eastasia, where their leaders are executed. 
The film ends with Winston Smith meeting Julia, and presumably 
falling in love. 


Subject: A chronological recording of cutscenes from The Binding 
Of Isaac: Afterbirth+, 2017, M (ESRB) 

Interference Point: Final cutscene 

Result: The chest is opened to reveal an exhausted, emaciated 
Isaac, who looks up to see two SCP-3922-A instances scooping him 
out of his would-be tomb. A montage follows, chronicling Isaac being 
fed, given medical attention, and eventually thriving in a 3922-A- 
supervised foster home, while his mother is apprehended and 
subjected to an agonizing but ultimately effective regimen of in- 
patient psychotherapy. The last scene ends with Isaac in his 
mother's hospital room, the two of them hugging and smiling 
tearfully. 

Note: On the day following this test, Binding of Isaac creator 
Edmund McMillen reported having had "the most wonderful dream" 
on his Twitter account, and reporting that the world felt "just a little 
brighter". 


Subject: The Last of Us: Story Version, a YouTube video containing 
every cutscene from the 2013 video game The Last of Us (Rated 
M), excluding the "Left Behind" prequel DLC. 


Interference Point: After Joel steps out of his apartment in the 
Boston quarantine zone. 

Result: SCP-3922-A instances invade the quarantine zone via 
armor and infantry storming the main entrance gate; city personnel 
surrender after two hours of intense fighting. Ellie is located by an 
SCP-3922-A instance, who uses an unknown medical device to 
extract the cure to the cordyceps infection while leaving her 
unharmed; meanwhile, Joel and Tess are arrested by other 
instances for smuggling unauthorized items into the quarantine 
zone. After developing the vaccine and inoculating everyone in the 
area, the remaining five hours show SCP-3922-A instances traveling 
across the post-apocalyptic landscape and terminating any infected 
or hostile survivors they find (the hunter-controlled Pittsburgh 
quarantine zone is obliterated via firebombing). End of the video 
shows SCP-3922-A instances arriving at the Firefly headquarters in 
Salt Lake City and informing them that their "unlawful actions will no 
longer be tolerated in restored civil society", implying they will 
attempt to bring all of the former United States under their control 
with their dissemination of the cure to the infection. 


Subject: La Jetée, 1962, Not Rated 

Interference Point: None. 

Result: End credits are replaced with the phrase "))) WE WILL 
FIND A WAY IN 95" 

Note: Do not test this again. Let's be more careful about testing 
abstract narratives in the future. - Dr. Naismith 


Subject: Metropolis, 1927, Not Rated 

Interference Point: During the scene in which the Robot Maria 
entices the Workers to rebellion. 

Result: SCP-3922-A instances enter the area where the workers 
are congregated. The SCP-3922-A instances restrain and deactivate 
the Robot Maria, which puts up no resistance. The remaining 
Workers are forcibly dispersed, and the film cuts to SCP-3922-A 
arresting C.A. Rotwang for crimes including “kidnapping, assault, 
and the unlicensed creation of an artificial intelligence”, and Joh 
Fredersen is mentioned to have been deposed and imprisoned for 
“violation of multiple labor laws”. Both Maria and several members of 
the Workers receive fines for “inciting rebellion”, and the film ends 
20 minutes early with the announcement that SCP-3922-A will be 


temporarily occupying Metropolis until civil order can be restored. 
Note: All dialogue for the SCP-3922-A instances is rendered as 
intertitles, in the style of the original film. 


Subject: Sharknado, 2013, Not Rated 

Interference Point: SPC-—3922-a first appears during the freeway 
scene, saving George. 

Result: SPC-3922-A are armed with boxing gloves instead of usual 
armaments. After the freeway scene, a SPC-3922-A instance will 
appear whenever a shark would bite someone. The instance will 
punch the shark. Punched sharks suffer no serious injuries, but 
usually swim out of the scene, rather than attacking. End credits 
includes statement "All sharks punched by ARMA ORUN." 


Subject: Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood, 1970 episode, TV-G 
Interference Point: At the beginning of the "Land of Make-Believe" 
segment 

Result: Several puppet characters remark on the suspicious 
absence of Lady Elaine Fairchilde and the disappearance of her 
Museum-Go-Round. An instance of SCP-3922-A enters, carrying 
Lady Elaine's magical Boomerang-Toomerang-Zoomerang in a 
semitransparent containment capsule labeled "TACTICAL 
DEZOOMERANGIFICATION MATRIX". The instance explains to 
King Friday that Lady Elaine "has to move away for a while on 
business, but she wishes you all the best." The rest of the episode 
proceeds without SCP-3922-A interference. 

Note: Further review of the SCP-3922-altered footage at altered 
volumes revealed muffled sounds of a hostile gunfire exchange in 
the distance, along with the phrase "Ya couldn't leave well enough 
alone, could ya, you Corbenese sons of—" from Lady Elaine, 
interrupted by an explosion before the expletive. 


Subject: WCW Bash At The Beach 1996, Unrated (professional 
wrestling) 

Interference Point: After the conclusion of the main event 

Result: The climax of the show proceeds as normal, with Hulk 
Hogan entering the ring to attack his presumptive allies and join 
forces with "outsiders" Scott Hall and Kevin Nash. As Hulk Hogan is 
delivering his famous "new world order of wrestling" speech to a rain 
of audience garbage, interviewer "Mean" Gene Okerlund deviates 


from his recorded questions and instead says, "Hulk, I'm sorry to 
have to say this, and | hope one day we can be friends again, but in 
WCW, there's only one order we respect." A brass-heavy theme 
plays in the arena, and ten unarmed SCP-3922-A instances emerge 
from the locker room entrance, marching towards the ring to 
thunderous applause from the audience and joyous exhortations 
from play-by-play commentator Tony Schiavone. Three instances 
recover the beaten Sting, Lex Luger, and Randy Savage, and assist 
them (as well as a visibly-crestfallen Okerlund) to the backstage 
area, while the others storm the ring to attack the newly-formed 
"New World Order". The SCP-3922-A instances conduct themselves 
as if they were extremely powerful wrestlers, obeying narrative 
conventions such as rebounding off the ring ropes when slung 
towards them by the "Irish Whip" maneuver. Nash and Hall are 
quickly overwhelmed by the SCP-3922-A assault, though Hogan 
manages to fight off four of the instances for several minutes before 
being rendered unconscious. The three are carried backstage for 
processing, while Schiavone celebrates "the inevitable hand of all 
justice", and the camera pans out over the crowd, where more 
SCP-3922-A instances can be seen handing citations for littering to 
numerous audience members. 

Note: Color commentator Bobby Heenan does not speak for this 
entire sequence. Camera shots of the announcer's desk show 
Heenan sitting in anxious silence as an SCP-3922-A instance 
stands behind him, arms crossed. 

Further testing with professional wrestling recordings shows that 
3922-A instances win their battles almost instantly, with the only 
competitors able to put up a fight being those who had significant 
creative influence over the product at the time, e.g. Hogan in 
mid-1990s WCW, Triple H in mid-2000s WWE, and El Santo in his 
entire EMLL run.4 - Researcher Tranh 


Subject: Barney the Dinosaur, 1997 episode, TV-G 

Interference Point: Start of episode 

Result: The episode began with Barney standing on an empty set 
with no other characters present. The actor inside the suit removed 
the headpiece revealing an SCP-3922-A instance. The instance 
then rotated a nearby whiteboard around with the following 
message. 

"Is the Foundation staffed by five year olds? Playing this episode in 


the hopes of watching us vaporise Barney is inapropriate to say the 
least. Act befitting your station or playtime is over." 

The episode then came to an end with the Three Moon sign on the 
screen. 

They do have a point, | suggest we ease up on the kid cartoons and 
shows. -Researcher Maytus 


Subject: CCTV recording of a 24 year old man smoking a marijuana 
cigar ("blunt") outside of his Sacramento, California apartment on 9 
Feb 2018.9 At the time of the footage and at present, consumption 
of recreational marijuana is legal in the state of California but 
remains illegal under federal law as per the Controlled Substances 
Act of 1970. 

Interference Point: After the man finishes smoking and puts out the 
marijuana cigar by pressing it against the concrete. 

Result: A single SCP-3922-A instance armed with an M16 rifle 
approaches the man, addressing him as "Mr. Smith." After the man 
expresses alarm, the instance explains that it is only there to inform 
the man that smoking marijuana is a violation of federal law and to 
dispose of his cigar in the nearby dumpster. When the man replies 
that consumption is legal under state law, the instance hands him a 
small piece of paper and explains that the Three Moons Initiative is 
currently "conflicted as to what action to take in this circumstance" 
and that he will not face legal consequences as a result. The 
instance then reminds the man that littering is illegal under California 
law and to always dispose of his discarded smoking materials in 
proper trash receptacles after extinguishing them before walking 
away. 

Note: Conflicting laws appear to produce an uncertain and/or 
confused response from SCP-3922-A. 


Subject: Final Fantasy Tactics, 1997, T (ESRB) (full playthrough 
recorded) 

Interference Point: Opening cutscene 

Result: Ovelia opens the scene by saying "))), please help us 
sinful children of Ivalice". Then, the screen scrolls down to reveal 
Agrias, Ramza and Delita in the monastery with her, all wearing a 
helmetless variant of SCP-3922-A armor. Agrias waxes enthusiastic 
about the Order of the Triple Moon, who arrived one year prior and 
swiftly placed Ivalice under martial law, pursuant to exterminating 


the "Lucavi infestation". Other topics discussed by the three include 
the mass-arrest of the Corpse Brigade, the ongoing recovery of 
Ramza's father, and concern as to how their friend Algus is handling 
the execution of Marquis Elmdor. Then, two more SCP-3922-A 
instances enter and remove their helmets, revealing themselves to 
be Wiegraf and Miluda Folles. The siblings politely inform the others 
that it is time to escort Ovelia home and begin patrol. The rest of the 
recording resembles basic gameplay, with the party of five traveling 
around the map and occasionally fighting parties of archaeodemons, 
implied to be the remnants of some brief, massive struggle. All five 
characters have the class "))) Knight", and use battlefield-spanning 
attacks like "Pacifica Gun" and "All-Holy2" to dispatch their foes 
swiftly. There are no further cutscenes. 


Subject: SCP-2030, Season 24, Episode "Swelling", 2000, Not 
Rated 

Interference Point: Beginning of first prank segment 

Result: 5 seconds after the beginning of the park prank segment, 
the screen turns white and a sound similar to that of a high yield 
nuclear explosion is audible, before the end title card plays. Analysis 
of the preceding frame shows a projectile superficially similar to a 
Scranton Reality Anchor round from scP-—2722 heading towards 
the ground at high velocity. 


Subject: Moana, 2016, PG 

Interference Point: The scene where Maui leaves Moana on an 
island and steals her boat 

Result: A helicopter with two SCP-3922-A instances hovers over 
Maui. One instance goes onto the boat and picks up Maui, taking 
him into custody. The Ocean then returns the boat to the island, 
where a helicopter has rescued Moana. 


Subject: "The Cold Equations" (episode of The New Twilight Zone), 
1989, TV-PG 

Interference Point: Beginning 

Result: A scene is added in which Marilyn is shown approaching the 
EDS. She is intercepted by armed instances of SCP-3922-A; they 
explain to her that if she stows away, the EDS will not have sufficient 
fuel to complete its vital mission, and that Captain Barton will be 
required to eject her into space to die. Marilyn is horrified, and does 


not board the EDS. The rest of the episode depicts Captain Barton 
successfully completing his mission to deliver medical supplies to 
the colony planet. 


Subject: Breaking Bad, Season 2 Episode 9 "4 Days Out", 2009, 
TV-14 

Interference Point: After Jesse Pinkman calls Skinny Pete a 
second time and learns that the latter is unable to find where he and 
Walt are stranded at in the desert. 

Result: Two helicopters with the Three Moons insignia on them 
approach Jesse, Walt, and the RV from a distance. After touching 
down, four SCP-3922-A instances emerge from a helicopter, two of 
which immediately arrest Jesse and Walt for manufacturing a 
controlled substance. The other two inspect the meth lab inside the 
RV and confiscate the recently created product. After being treated 
for dehydtration, Jesse and Walt are transported to the Alouquerque 
Metropolitan Detention Center as an SCP-3922-A instance calls a 
disbelieving Hank Schrader and informs him that his brother-in-law 
is Heisenberg. The remainder of the episode depicts the 
consequences of Walt's public exposure: Hank angrily interrogates 
an arrogant and defiant Walt, resulting in the two nearly coming to 
blows. Starting at the halfway point of the episode, a separate 
subplot chronicles Saul Goodman's law firm being shut down for his 
illegal activities, though Saul himself manages to evade capture by 
either SCP-3922-A instances or the police and vanishes from 
Albuquerque. Closing shot of the episode depicts Walt coldly staring 
at a conflicted Hank through his prison cell doors after delivering a 
monologue in which he revealed his role in the death of Tuco 
Salamanca. 

Note: Gus Fring, Mike Ehrmantraut, and other law-breaking 
characters introduced later in the series are absent from the episode 
and apparently remain undetected by SCP-3922-A. 


Subject: A recording of a playthrough of Doki Doki Literature Club!, 
2017, Not Rated. 

Interference Point: The day before the festival, right after Sayori's 
confession. 

Result: SCP-3922-A instances appeared as character sprites just 
before the day is supposed to fade out, signaling the end of the 
scene. Dialog is consistent with vocalizations made in previous 


Interview 507-G 


Interviewed: SCP-507 , SCP-507 
Interviewer: Dr.