Child at Heart: They say that good things come in small 
packages, and that’s especially true for The Child at 
Heart model skeleton! These cute little bones may look 
frail, but don’t worry! This system is built with the same 
durability that customers expect from all Dr. Gale skeletal 
structures. Perfect for customers who want their human 
to stay fun-sized forever. 

Item #: CH024 


Classy Lady: The Classy Lady skeleton was originally 
designed exclusively for human females, but it has been 
adapted by popular demand to be available for males as 
well. This fashionable mid-sized skeleton is perfect for 
that “carefree-young-adult” human. 

Item #: CLO15 


John Croft: The John Croft is our most popular 
skeleton, and for good reason! This all-purpose bone 
system can be applied to virtually any style of human, 
from the young vibrant female to the elderly wise male. 
This model is great for those looking for a goes-with- 
anything style skeleton. 

ltem #: JC201 


Tall Paul: This specialist skeleton is for the customer 
who wants a BIG human! Your human will tower above 
the others with this high quality bone structure. Impress 
your friends and intimidate your enemies with the Tall 
Paul today! 

Item #: TP102 


Muscles and Fat: After the skeletal system, 
you need to give your human muscles to 
move! All humans purchased from Dr. Gale’s 
Human Emporium© come with a specially 
tailored metabolism to match their muscle 


and fat type, to ensure that they naturally 
keep the figure you ordered. 


Youthful Spirit: This elegant system captures the very 
essence of human youth. The smooth, supple muscles 
and sculpted fatty tissues invoke the carefree spirit of a 
human with their whole life ahead of them. 

Item #: YS124 


Lots to Love: With generous amounts of fatty tissues 
across the entire body, this system is for those who like 
their humans with curves. The system also includes an 
enhanced muscular build, so all that wobbly goodness 
won't slow your purchase down. 

Item #: LL145 


Casual Athlete: Keep your human trim and healthy with 
the Casual Athlete muscular system! This system blends 
physical prowess with casual style into one of our most 
popular items. Your human will look great with the 
Casual Athlete muscles, regardless of age or gender! 
Item #: CA209 


Herculean Physique: If you want a strong human, then 
you want the Herculean Physique, our most powerful 
muscular system available! Humans with the Herculean 
Physique can lift up to 400 pounds/181 kilograms, 
guaranteed! And with virtually no fat on the entire body, 
you'll get an unobscured view of those muscles beneath 
the skin! 

Item #: HP245 


Smooth and Slender: For those who believe that less is 
more, the Smooth and Slender is the ideal choice! These 
muscles are so thin you can barely see them, and this 
model is 99% fat free! 

Item #: SS098 


Skin: The skin is the most visible part of the 
body, and at Dr. Gale’s Human Emporium© 


we use only the finest materials to create a 
flawless epidermis for your human. 


Snow White: Mirror mirror, on the wall. Who’s the palest 
of them all? The Snow White is a wonderful creamy- 
white tone for your human, perfect for those looking for a 
truly unique purchase. 

Item #: SW087 


Anglo-Saxon: This Caucasian skin is great for those 

who love the European style! The Anglo-Saxon draws 
both its name and coloration from the native people of 
the U. K., and works with almost any hair or eye style. 
ltem #: AS118 


Asian Persuasion: The exotic styles of the Far East can 
be yours with the Asian Persuasion skin tone! From 
Tokyo to Hanoi, this distinct epidermis is a must-have for 
any fans of the Orient. 

Item #: AP163 


South of the Border: Add some Latin spice to your 
human with the richly tanned colors of Central America. 
Nothing says “muy elegante’[sic] like the South of the 
Border! 

Item #: SB112 


Simply Dalit-ful: Your human will curry your favor with 
the Simply Dalit-ful skin tone. This golden-brown skin will 
give your human that beautiful Hindi look, guaranteed! 
ltem #: SD123 


Back in Black: They say that black goes with anything 
and we agree! This dark rich color is perfect for capturing 
the urban feel of the modern human. Warning: once you 
go black, you never go back! 

ltem #: BB130 


Personality Matrixes: Once you’ve got the 
basic stuff out of the way, you can add the 


most defining part of your human: their 
mind. Dr. Gale’s Human Emporium© 
guarantees quality and full function for all 
mental features, and we can seamlessly 
blend any intelligence quotient, with a 
personality type to create a unique 
individual! 


Faithful Companion: This personality matrix is great for 
those who want a best friend forever. The Faithful 
Companion is always ready to spend time with you, 
whether you're playing together on the beach, reading a 
good book by the fire, or just getting a good night’s 
sleep. Never be alone again with a Faithful Companion! 
Item #: FC210 


Frienemy Mine: A human with the Frienemy Mine 
personality matrix is always ready for some healthy 
competition. The Frienemy Mine will constantly strive to 
outdo you in sports, finance, or whatever else you find 
most interesting. The perfect opponent is yours with the 
Frienemy Mine! 

Item #: FE203 


Mommy Dearest: Need someone to take care of you? 
Then look no further than the Mommy Dearest 
personality matrix! The Mommy Dearest will provide you 
with warm and unconditional support whenever you need 
it, and will make itself busy around your house when you 
want to be alone. 

Item #: MD196 


Main Squeeze: Satisfy your primal urges with the Main 
Squeeze personality! Designed to create the ultimate 
boyfriend/girlfriend, the Main Squeeze is our single most 
popular personality matrix, ever! Enjoy a night on the 
town with your Main Squeeze! 

Item #: MS201 


Supreme Sycophant: If you want the perfect yes man, 
you can’t find a better personality matrix than the 
Supreme Sycophant! This human will agree to anything, 
guaranteed! You'll never find a more compliant 
companion than a Supreme Sycophant! 

Item #: SS220 


+ Show Addendum 2 


Addendum SCP-1532-2: The address on the pre-paid 
envelope included with each copy of SCP-1532-b is as 
following: 


Dr. Gale’s Human Emporium 
143 Short Street 
Lempster, Wyoming 7236C 


There is no record of any city, town, or settlement in the 
state of Wyoming named Lempster, and the zip code 
does not match with current or previous U.S. postal 
regulations. 


+ Show Interview 1 


Excerpt from an interview conducted by Dr.E —_— with an 
instance of SCP-1532-a purchased by a Foundation front 
company. The purchase included the “Supreme 
Sycophant” personality matrix. 


Dr. E: Hello. 

SCP-1532-a: Hello, sir. 

Dr. E: Please state your name, for the record. 
SCP-1532-a: Well, | was purchased as “Test 
Subject 1”, but you can call me anything you 
want, sir. 

Dr. E: So, you are aware that you were 
purchased from Dr. Gale’s Human Emporium? 
SCP-1532-a: Of course | am, sir. 

Dr. E: What exactly are you? 

SCP-1532-a: I’m sorry sir, but I’m afraid | don’t 
really understand the question. I’m sure it’s my 


fault. 

Dr. E: Well, how were you created? 
SCP-1532-a: |’m really, really sorry, sir, but | 
don’t remember. 

Dr. E: Do you know where Dr. Gale’s Human 
Emporium is located? 

SCP-1532-a: Dr. Gale’s Human Emporium is 
located at 143 Short Street, Lempster, 
Wyoming. P.O. box 7236C. 

Dr. E: Can you point out the location of 
Lempster, Wyoming on a map? 
SCP-1532-a: Of course, sir. 

[Dr. E shows SCP-1532-a a map of the state 
of Wyoming. SCP-1532-a inspects the map for 
three minutes. ] 

SCP-1532-a: I’m sorry, sir, but this map is all 
wrong. Would you like me to go find you a 
better one? 

Dr. E: No. Let’s move on. 

SCP-1532-a: Whatever you Say, sir. 

Dr. E: What's the very first thing you can 
remember? 

SCP-1532-a: | was in a van, sir. They gave me 
a name and an address to go to. | think it 
was... about two hours ago. 

Dr. E: And this doesn’t bother you at all? 
SCP-1532-a: No sir. Should it bother me? 
Dr. E: It would bother most people. 
SCP-1532-a: | didn’t know that, sir. But | 
believe you. 

Dr. E: Do you know who Dr. Gale is? 
SCP-1532-a: Dr. Gale is the owner and 
proprietor of Dr. Gale’s Human Emporium, sir. 
Dr. E: ls Dr. Gale human? 

SCP-1532-a: |’m afraid | don’t know, sir. | 
would assume so. But maybe not. 
[IRRELEVANT DATA EXPUNGED] 


+ Show Interview 2 


On 11/04/20 , over two thousand copies of a new 
version of SCP-1532-b appeared in mailboxes across 
the North American continent. This version included 
several new traits not found in previous editions. The 
new edition also included a telephone number for 
“customer support”. The customer support number is 
fifteen digits long, significantly longer than any normal 
telephone number for the North American continent. 
Attempts to trace the phone number have failed. The 
following is a log of a phone conversation between Dr. 
C  andone or more unknown entities. Dr.C was 
instructed to prolong the conversation for as long as 
possible to maximize potential information gained. Due 


to the context of the conversation and the distinct change 


between the voices from the other end of the line, it is 
most likely that at least three separate individuals spoke 
toDr.C_ , hereafter referred to as Entity-1, -2, and -3. 


Entity-1: Good Morning, thank you for calling 
Dr. Gale’s Human Emporium, my name is Ted. 
How can | help you? 

Dr. C: Hello, Ted. May | ask where your facility 
is located? 

Entity-1: Dr. Gale’s Human Emporium is 
located at one-four-three Short Street in 
Lempster, Wyoming. 

Dr. C: And where is Lempster, Wyoming 
located? 

Entity-1: It’s on the map, sir. Just west of New 
Dunsmouth, and south of Pale Sun.1 

Dr. C: Do you have longitude and latitude 
coordinates? 

Entity-1: I’m afraid | don’t have that 
information. Do you have a specific complaint 
about one of our products? Because | have 
other customers on the line. 

Dr. C: Yes, actually. | recently bought a human 
from your company, but he died after less than 
a week. 

Entity-1: Can | have the product’s name and 


the delivery address? 

Dr. C: He was purchased as “Test Subject 
One” by my company [REDACTED].2 
Entity-1: Okay, here we go. According to our 
records, the product was alive and healthy 
when it was delivered to you. 

Dr. C: Yes, | know that. But it just dropped 
dead yesterday. 

Entity-1: Are you sure the human had access 
to food and water? 

Dr. C: Yes. 

Entity-1: Did you physically harm or damage 
the human prior to its death? 

Dr. C: No. 

Entity-1: Do you still have the body? 

Dr. C: Yes. 

Entity-1: Well, the best | can do is allow you to 
send the body back to us for a discount on 
your next purchase. 

Dr. C: That’s unacceptable. | want a 
replacement. 

Entity-1: I’m not authorized to issue a 
replacement, sir. Would you like to talk to the 
manager? 

Dr. C: Yes, please. 

Entity-1: Please hold. 

[audio on the other side becomes famous 
classical pieces being played by a jazz band 
for approximately ten minutes] 

Entity-2: Hello, thanks for calling Dr. Gale’s 
Human Emporium, my name is Clair. I’m told 
you have a complaint about a recently 
purchased human? 

Dr. C: Yes, he died yesterday and I'd like a 
replacement. 

Entity-2: Are you sure the human had access 
to food and water? 

Dr. C: Yes. 

Entity-2: Did you physically harm or damage 
the human prior to its death? 


Dr. C: No. 

Entity-2: Well, | suppose that we could offer a 
replacement, if you could bring the human 
back to our factory. 

Dr. C: Where is your factory located? 
Entity-2: A-hundred-and-forty-three Short 
Street, Lempster Wyoming. 

Dr. C: | have a map of Wyoming in front of me 
right now, and | don’t see anywhere called 
“Lempster’”. 

Entity-2: Well, | guess you need a new map. 
[laugh] Just follow interstate twelve south from 
Pale Sun and you'll run right into it. 

Dr. C: Interstate twelve doesn’t run through 
Wyoming. 

Entity-2: Are you sure you're looking at a 
current map? 

Dr. C: I’m sure. 

Entity-2: Well, I’m sorry. But unless you can 
return the human to our factory, we can’t offer 
a replacement. 

Dr. C: That’s unacceptable. | demand to speak 
to your superior. 

Entity-2: All right, if you insist. I'll transfer you, 
but it might be a while before Dr. Gale answers 
the phone. 

[audio on the other side becomes famous 
classical pieces being played by a jazz band 
again for approximately one hour, twenty 
minutes] 

Entity-3: What speaks to 1?3 

Dr. C: Am | speaking to Dr. Gale? 

Entity-3: That is who | am named. 

Dr. C: Are you a human being? 

Entity-3: | create humans. 

Dr. C: But are you, yourself, a human? 
Entity-3: Put up the phone, Dr.C  . You have 
nothing to complain about. 

Dr. C: How did you know my name? 

Entity-3: Put up the phone. You have nothing 


to complain. 

Dr. C: Tell me how you know my name. 
Entity-3: Does anyone like being eaten? 
Dr. C: What? 

Entity-3: Put up the phone. 

Dr. C: What was that about being eaten? 
Entity-3: Put up the phone. Go back to your 
foundation.4 You have nothing to complain. 
Dr. C: What do you know about the 
Foundation? 

Entity-3: | have another work that needs 
doing. Goodbye. 

Dr. C: Wait- 

[CALL ENDED] 


- These things are biologically indistinguishable from humans and 
aren't that expensive. If we could use purchase them in bulk we 
could eliminate the need for D-class all together. — Dr. E 


- Negative. Until we find the location of SCP-1532 and discover how 
these things are being made, we must consider them as potentially 
hostile entities and deal with them appropriately. — O5- 


- Why are we spending so many Foundation resources to attempt to 
locate SCP-1532, when we don’t even know that it exists in any way 
we can comprehend? Everything we know about it comes from 
instances of SCP-1532-a and -b. What if it only exists in whatever 
realm of reality the delivery vans come from and go to? — O5- 


- The potential gains for the Foundation warrant further investigation. 
Furthermore, the entity identified as “Dr. Gale” knew Dr.C _‘s name 
and appeared to know about the existence of the SCP Foundation, 
representing a serious security breach we must pursue. — O5- 


Footnotes 

1. Both names did not correspond with any city or town found 
anywhere in the United States. 

2. Test Subject One had been purchased by a Foundation front 
company (see interview 1) and had been terminated prior to this call. 
3. Linguistic analysis of Entity-3's syntax shows that Entity-3 is 
significantly less fluent in English than Entities-1 and -2. Voice 


analysis cannot determine where Entity-3's accent originates from, 
nor can it conclusively determine Entity-3's gender. 

4. It is currently unknown if Entity-3 is aware of the existence of the 
SCP Foundation, or if it was using the word "foundation" to mean 
something else. 


« SCP-1531 | SCP-1532 | SCP-1533 » 


SCP-1533: The Collective 


Item #: SCP-1533 
Object Class: Euclid