“Not really. All our Fun-Lovers are technically Type Blacks, and 
they’re all alive and kicking,” Lolly said as she came up to the 
counter to pet one of Al’s cats. “That’s much more impressive than 
one dead Type Black.” 


“It would be more impressive if they were contained in something a 
little sturdier than a carnival trailer,” Iris retorted. “Wait a minute, that 


mummy doesn’t happen to have any Daevite weapons with it, does 
it?” 


“ 


Fraid not.” 


“Yeah, that was a long shot. Any Akivic Purification Serum by 
chance then?” 


“You mean His Holy Tears? No, but what the hell is Darke the Elder 
working on to want all this stuff for?” 


“Just something to pass the time,” Iris said deflectively. “He’s an old 
man, he doesn’t get out much. I'll just take the Pactolus Philter, an 
ounce of abiogenic catalyst, a bottle of Quicksilver and a witch’s 
dozen of spectral embers. Bill it to the corporate account.” 


“Hey Edward, | couldn’t help but notice that there are a lot more 
guards around than the last time | was here,” Victor said as he 
gazed out the window into the bustling street outside. “Is everything 
alright?” 


“’m not really supposed to say anything, they don’t want to cause a 
panic, but ah...” He cranked his neck towards the front door to make 
sure no one else was listening. “There’s a serial killer on the loose. 
Some sort of inbred goblin creature from the House of Habsburg.” 


“The House of Habsburg?” Iris asked, her ears perking with interest. 


“Yeah, we think it’s hiding out in the sewers,” he said as he set the 
pack of spectral embers down before her. “The Guards have been 
down there twice already but they couldn't find it. How it ended up 


here we have no idea. From what I’ve heard there are thousands of 
the bastards in central Europe. They’re so persistent even the 
Foundation is having trouble keeping a lid on them. There’s talk that 
the Coalition is getting ready to bring the hammer down on them 
though. They’re going to set up sting operations to catch their 
hunters, tag them and track them back to their hives, then go full 
scorched earth. | hope they burn every last one of them.” 


They were all startled by the sound of the cat shrieking in sudden 
pain and bolting out of Lolly’s grasp as her grip reflexively tightened. 


“What did you just say?” she asked softly, the anger in her voice 
barely contained. “Did you actually just say you want those fascist 
paraphobes to burn Freaks alive?” 


“Lolly, listen, | know you think of yourself as Serpent’s Hand so 
you're no fan of the Coalition, but we’re talking about psychotic 
cannibals who breed like rabbits. These aren't innocent Freaks.” 


“And genocide is the best solution? Stick to what you’re good at, 
right?” 


“Lolly, they’re not genocidal. Their governing body is made up of 
representatives from 108 occult factions, including the Alchemist’s 
Guild, and they have an entire division dedicated to maintaining 
peaceful relations with the anomalous community.” 


“On their terms! They expect us to stay confined to Nexuses or 
extradimensional ghettos and pretend we don't exist because as 
long as we’re secret we have no rights and they can do whatever 
they want to us! Any Freak that doesn’t submit is labelled a 
parathreat and ‘liquidated’! The Geo Sea are Nazis who want us all 
either dead or locked up, | hate them, and | hope those Habsburg 
goblins eat them alive!” 


Lolly stormed out of the shop, slamming the door so hard the glass 
shattered and the door frame cracked. 


“| really should choose my words more carefully around type 
Greens,” Edward lamented. 


“I’m going to go after her, I’ve never seen her like this,” Victor said, 
running through the broken doorway. 


“Ms. Dark, is it okay if | add the damage to your bill?” Ed asked, only 
to find that she had vanished, along with the box of spectral embers. 
“Ms. Dark?” 


“Brother, did you scare off our customers again?” Al shouted from 
the backroom. 


“... Maybe.” 


Victor sprinted out into the busy bazaar, looking for any sign of a 
distressed Clown. Fortunately, he didn’t have to look far. Lolly had 
gone into the alley beside the Emporium and was sitting against the 
wall, hugging her knees with her head hung as she took deep 
breaths. 


“Lolly? Lolly, are you alright?” Victor asked as he crouched beside 
her. 


“I’m sorry. The Geo Sea just really triggers me,” she said. 


“Yeah, | remember,” he smirked, thinking back to the first show he 
had ever seen her perform. 

“But | didn’t actually know it was because you thought of yourself as 
Serpent’s Hand.” 


“After the Circus, the Library was the first magical place | got to 
visit,” she began. “It was incredible; bookcases the size of 
mountains that stretched on as far as the eye could see, holding 
every book from every iteration of every reality in the multiverse. 
Icky told me that it was a Sanctuary for Freaks, just like the Circus, 
and that the Ways wouldn’t let anyone they knew were bad in, and if 
someone bad did get in the Docents and the Elephant God would 
protect us. Then she introduced me to some people she knew in the 
Serpent’s Hand and explained that they kept magic and Freaks safe 
from people who wanted us kept secret or destroyed, and that it was 
because of people like them that one day magic and Freaks 
wouldn’t have to be secret anymore. 


"The day | found out magic was real was the best day of my life. My 
life has been wonderful and incredible because of magic, and I’ve 
dedicated my life to sharing that joy with others. Every time | 
perform, | show new people that magic is real and wonderful, and 
the Geo Sea want me dead because of that. | have friends who are 
dead because of them. They want everyone who wants the dumb 
Masquerade overthrown dead, and if they had the firepower they’d 
want every Freak in the multiverse dead. 


"When | think of magic, | think of my Circus and the Library and 
Wondertainment’s toys and mindblowing anart and kindly old 
Mekhanites and the Oneiroi Dreamworld. | think of amazing, 
marvellous things and | hate that some people only think of the 
anomalous as something monstrous. 


"You don't still think of me as a monster, do you?” 
“I never -” 


“Yes, you did. I’m not stupid. Isn’t that why you came after me? You 
were worried that the monster Clown might be going ona 
rampage?” 


“| came after you because you’re my friend, and | was worried about 
you,” Victor told her. 


For the first time, Lolly looked at him, smiling even as tears still 
streamed down her face. 


“Really?” she asked. 


“Look, | don’t really want to get into a discussion about anomalous 
civil rights, and | think the whole situation is a lot more complicated 
than good guys and bad guys, but | know you're not a monster, and 

| don’t want you dead or locked up. And maybe | wouldn’t always 
have thought that, which is why I’m glad I’ve had the chance to know 
you and your Circus.” 


“That’s why | do what | do,” she smirked. “Jeez, I’m a mess. | gotta 
get some Milk into me. Hey, don't tell Icky that Edward made me cry, 
or what he said about the Geo Sea. She might take it worse than | 


did.” 
“| won't, | promise.” 
“Iris either.” 


“|...” he looked around, suddenly realizing he wasn’t sure where Iris 
was. “Oh crap.” 


While the others were distracted by Lolly’s outburst, Iris had snuck 
out a side door and into an empty back alley. Using her bionic hand 
to slide off a manhole cover, she had slipped into the sewers to do 
some goblin hunting. 


The sewers were absurdly spacious, similar to the ones in Vienna 
that the Habsburg Dynasty had previously called home. One of their 
lineage would no doubt be quite adept at navigating and concealing 
itself in such a subterranean labyrinth. It made perfect sense that 
platoons of guards storming the sewers hadn’t been able to find it. 
The creature wasn’t stupid, and had safely remained in its hiding 
place until they had passed. But a young woman, all by herself? 
That seemed like it would offer the creature far more incentive to 
come out. 


“Hello?” she said in a soft whimper, doing the best damsel-in- 
distress impression she could manage. “Is anyone there? I, | fell 
down the manhole. | think | broke my ankle, | can’t climb back up. 
Please, is anyone down here?” 


She smiled as she heard the faint scampering of feet against wet 
stone coming towards her. In her right hand, she held a spectral 
ember at the ready. The footsteps grew louder, and she could hear 
the bestial thing furtively sniffing the air. She let out a small, 
frightened sob to draw in her prey. It took the bait, and she felt its 
disgusting breath on the back of her neck. 


She immediately ignited the ember she held into a Spectral Flame, 
flooding the sewers with light. The Habsburg Noble howled in pain 
and shock at the dreaded illumination, shielding its eyes and blindly 
trying to fall back. Instead, Iris grabbed its throat with her left bionic 


hand, lifting it off the ground and slamming it against the wall. It 
struggled with ferocious might, but relented when Iris brought the 
Spectral Flame up to its face. 


“Nein, nein, nicht das Licht! Bitte, wir geben nach? it wailed. 


“I’m sorry, but I’m not quite fluent in German. Did you say you’d like 
some more light?” Iris smirked as she increased the intensity of the 
fire. 


“Nein, no, please!” it pleaded. “Please, please we submit, just take 
away das Licht!” 


“But | want to get a good look at you; you are such a rare creature 
after all,” Iris replied. 


The being was only a few inches shorter than her at about five feet, 
though would have stood taller had its back not been so horribly 
bent. Its skin was pale and hairless, each hand held seven long, 
splayed fingers, and its pointed ears were so large as to be almost 
bat-like. Its left eye, the larger of the two, had a black cornea and 
gold iris, while the other had a clouded cornea and red iris. Its nose 
was hooked and crooked, but most grotesque of all was a mouth 
that went almost literally ear to ear and was filled with multiple, 
misaligned rows of large teeth. 


“Incredible. The product of three hundred years of alchemically 
enabled and accelerated inbreeding, dozens of generations without 
any outside blood, reinforced by the ruthless culling of all but the 
most monstrously mutated, you are a work of art!” Iris marvelled. “1 
can’t believe | actually got a chance to look at one of you things up 
close. Do you have a name, little Nosferatu?” 


“Freiherr Dagoburt von Habsburg. Please, forgive us! We thought 
you a mere peasant, but your strength and cunning are proof of 
noble blood. We were going to eat you, but now we see you would 
be a worthy vessel for our brood. Let us fornicate, and a fortnight 
from now the noble products of our union will gnaw their way 
through your womb and burst forth to carry on our combined 
bloodlines!” 


SCP-627: Perpetual Circle 


Item #: SCP-627 
Object Class: Safe 


Special Containment Procedures: One Class-D personnel, 
designated D-627, is to be assigned to SCP-627. This assignment is 
for life. As long as the Class-D is so assigned, he is rendered 
exempt from the monthly terminations. SCP-627 is to be kept ina 
stone basin, approximately one meter across. Once daily, SCP-627 
is to be removed from its basin so that lubrication may be applied to 
the basin. Once weekly, SCP-627 is to be removed so that the basin 
may be inspected for wear. The basin is to be replaced if it shows 
signs of wearing out. 


Testing on SCP-627 is currently denied to all researchers. 


Description: SCP-627 was brought into the Foundation in 
December of 1932 by Senior ResearcherA E , fleeing 
religious persecution in Germany. Senior Researcher E found 
SCP-627 during his work with the German government on their own 
SCP protocols, and felt that it could be more useful with us. 


SCP-627 is a sohere made of unknown stone, flecked with blue, of 
approximately three centimeters in height. When not in close 
(defined as skin contact, or in clothing being worn) contact with a 
human being, SCP-627 rolls in a circle approximately one meter 
across. It will not avoid inanimate obstacles, instead rolling up and 
over any impediments. It will never attempt to go around 
impediments, and, if contained in a space smaller than one meter, 
will increase in speed until it has worn itself a way out. When 
confined to a small space, SCP-627 is capable of breaking the 
speed of sound. When not confined, SCP-627 rolls at a speed of 
approximately six rotations a minute. 


Note / /1939: We need to figure this one out. If we can just 


“I’m flattered, really, but | am rather focused on my career at the 
moment so I'll have to pass,” she replied. Placing the Spectral 
Flame on the ground, she pulled out her old box cutter and made a 
small slash on the goblin’s skin. It hissed in indignation but made no 
attempt to break free. A smear of a midnight blue humor began 
oozing from the laceration. 


“Literal blue blood; brilliant!” she smiled. She now used her box 
cutter to carve a sigil into the goblin’s flesh. 


“What are you doing?” it demanded. 


“Just a little exsanguination spell | know,” she replied, pocketing the 
box cutter and unhooking the hermetic vase she had brought with 
her from her belt. “You Habsburgs aren’t the only ones who value 
that blue blood in your veins. If the Coalition has their way, it will be 
priceless pretty soon.” 


“No, wait, please! | can pay you double what my blood is worth! 
Spare me and | -” 


“Oh, I’m not going to sell it. I’m going to give it as a gift to my 
Grandsire, to ensure | stay in his good graces, and also just 
because I’m a little curious about what he'll actually do with it. 
Besides, | can’t have you murdering and terrorizing the biggest flea 
market in the multiverse; it’s bad for business.” 


Iris dropped the Habsburg to the ground and began murmuring 
invocations in the Chaos Tongue. Aerosolised blood began rising 
from the sigil and raining into the open vase. The pitiful creature 
shrieked and wailed as its convulsing body rapidly lost its vital fluids, 
flailing its limbs and thrashing its head in agony. It let out an ear- 
splitting scream as the last of its noble blood was depleted and its 
body went limp. 


Somehow, the desiccated corpse was even uglier than it had been 
in life. Dragging it by the scruff of the neck, Iris tossed it into the 
sewage channel for the Bazaar’s authorities to find and deal with. 


Ensuring the lid on the vase was tightly sealed, she picked it up and 
gazed at it in contemplation for a moment. 


“Not even the weirdest part of my day,” she smirked to herself. 


« The Sea Slug and the Showman | Dread & Circuses Hub | 
Let’s Get this Show on the Road! » 


Let's Get this Show on the Road! 


« Freaks, Friends, and Fiends| Dread & Circuses Hub | A Circus 
Come To Not » 


In a quiet corner just outside the universe, bookshelves stretched to 
the heavens. Line upon line of them continued onward as far as the 
eye could see, and even further beyond that. From nowhere in 
particular, a soft light beamed down, just warm enough to be 
comfortable. At the same time, a gentle breeze rustled through 
pages, creating a soft whisper, reminding patrons that they were ina 
sacred place. Tread lightly, it said, for this is the Wanderer's Library. 


A pleasant smell wafted through, carried by the wind. It came from a 
hollowed-out space in a particularly large bookshelf, which had been 
fashioned into a quaint little café. While patrons buzzed around it 
like flies, it retained the same quiet, dignified feel as the rest of the 
Librar- 


"This place is freakin' awesome!" rang out a high pitched voice, 
followed by what can only be described as a 'squee’. The 
hyperactive young Clown spun around, taking in the scene with a 
smile on her face.