POI 2-S TG473: ...no, no, | should be fine. Anyway. | 
had problems when it came to the teeth. You wouldn't 
think of this, but removing the teeth from a tiny man is 
not a particularly easy task. They kept breaking. Every 
time, | use my finest pliers, then *plink* they break apart 
right as I'm about to get them out. The heightened 
nerves that come from doing such delicate work at 
gunpoint were not helpful for my labors. Fortunately, | 
was able to devise something of a solution that was 
acceptable to my clients, involving grinding up the 
remaining teeth and mixing the resulting slurry with some 
ceramic and...well, details bore outsiders, | know. Suffice 
to say that | ended affairs by scooping out its brain and 
pumping the tissue full of preservatives as fast as | could 
manage. Several hours later, all of the... materials, were 
done curin. The three gentlemen produced four glass 
jars, full of surprises as they were. They placed the 
preserved bits of their small acquaintance in the jars, and 
without a word exited, leaving behind the hundred 
thousand and the somewhat worse-for-wear remains of 
the little...thing. Do you happen to have any cognac on 
premises here? 


Agent Navarro: What happened next? 


POI 2-S TG473: Strangely, the profitable night left me 
feeling less than jubilant. It was almost dawn, | was quite 
tired, confused, and to be frank, frightened. | pondered 
the nights events, when the remains of the little man 
started...I'm not sure how to say...moaning? It was likely 
moaning. | decided that my work day was at an end then 
and there, and | pitched the little man into my incinerator, 


turned it up high, shut the door and plugged my ears. 
Agent Navarro: Just...into the incinerator, like that? 


POI 2-S TG473: Yes. Just like that. What would you 
have recommended? 


Agent Navarro: That will be all, Mr. 
End intake statement 


« SCP-1496 | SCP-1497 | SCP-1498 » 


SCP-1498: Dial-A-Dream 


Item #: SCP-1498 
Object Class: Euclid 


Special Containment Procedures: All instances of SCP-1498 are 
to be held in standard containment chambers, located within 
Site-77. One technician is to be on-hand to answer any calls 
placed to SCP-1498. Transcripts of all calls must be placed in 
Site-77's non-anomalous records archive. Any persons found to 
have interacted with SCP-1498 are to be quarantined for 2 months, 
or until they show signs of SCP-1498. Subjects showing signs of 
exposure are to be contained as an instance of SCP-1498-1, which 
require the same accommodation as instances of SCP-1498. 


Description: SCP-1498 is a collection of 30 autonomous bundles of 
phone cords and handsets, assembled in such a way that they 
resemble sheep. Instances of SCP-1498 are fully ambulatory, and 
will wander their containment chambers aimlessly. The words "Make 
your own Custom dreamscapes, with your friends at The Oneiroi 
Collective."! are printed on each instance. 


If a sapient organism attempts to use one of the phone handsets 
present on SCP-1498, they will hear three rings, followed by a voice 
identifying themselves as an operator for the "The Oneiroi 
Collective". This voice will instruct the subject on various options 
they have for dreaming, and make suggestions for enhanced 
dreaming experiences. Following the completion of this call, the 
subject will lose consciousness for 9 hours. 


When the subject regains consciousness, they will claim to have 
experienced the dream they ordered, to any exact specifications 
they may have made. Subjects may express a desire to continue 
using SCP-1498's effect, or attempt to re-use it immediately. A 
transcript of a subject describing their experience while under 
SCP-1498's effect has been included in this report. 


D-4560, after being exposed to SCP-1498 

| was sitting in this room, except it wasn't really a room, 
because the edges were sloped, so it was like, an egg 
room. With green paper, but it wasn't that green. Just a 
little green here and there. Anyways, I'm right in the 
middle, sitting on the ground... ‘cept of course, the fact 
that | was being supported. It's then | realize that I'm 
actually a table. Like you guys told me to tell the weird 
sheep-phone-thing. There're people eating off'a me too, 
look old, maybe from the 1950's, with red faces. 


That was when we finally hatched, and | woke up. 


As subjects are repeatedly exposed to SCP-1498, they may begin to 
experience changes to their bodily and mental state. Subjects 
affected by SCP-1498 will express a desire to sleep as frequently as 
possible, preferring the use of SCP-1498 if they are able to. While 
asleep, portions of the subject's cranium and skull will be replaced 
with portions of telephones similar to those found on SCP-1498. 
This has manifested in a variety of ways, including: 


¢ Subjects coughing up telephones, with cords extending into 
their esophagus. 

* Telephone wires beginning to grow in place of hair. 

* Ringing devices found on rotary telephones found within the 
subject's ears, which may begin ringing continuously. 

¢ Vocalizations being replaced with dial tones. 


Eventually, a rotary phone will assemble itself on the subject's head, 
out of all the components that have been grown within and on their 
bodies. Subjects will display the same intelligence as instances of 
SCP-1498, and are to be classified as instances of SCP-1498-1. As 
of 8/19/2012, no attempt to restore the intelligence of an 
SCP-1498-1 instance has succeeded. 


SCP-1498 was recovered on 9/18/1965, from an abandoned office 
complex in Miami, FL, USA, after reports of bizarre livestock 
reached local Foundation assets. When Foundation agents entered 
the building, they discovered the SCP-1498 instances, one bedroll, 
approximately half a ton of rotary telephone components, and two 
pints of Type-AB blood in a glass jar. In addition, one pajama 


onesie, well worn, was discovered folded at the bedroll. Testing has 
shown several months worth of sweat and body oils soaked into the 
fabric. 


As of 11/14/1965, SCP-1498 has been classified as Euclid. 


Footnotes 
1. Believed to be connected toSCP-2028andSCP-2805 


« SCP-1497 | SCP-1498 | SCP-1499 » 


SCP-1499: The Gas Mask 


Item #: SCP-1499 
Object Class: Safe 


Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1499 is to be kept in a 
locked box guarded by two agents at all times. Testing involving 
SCP-1499 requires the authorization of Level 4 personnel is to be 
discontinued indefinitely. Test subjects are to wear a small full- 
duplex two-way radio underneath SCP-1499 to maintain contact with 
researchers. Testing is no longer to be carried out by D-Class 
personnel due to the risk of losing SCP-1499. Should test subjects 
enter any sort of danger, they are to remove SCP-1499 immediately. 


Description: SCP-1499 is a Soviet GP-5 gas mask. A seal test 
performed on the object suggests that the object retains its original 
functionality. The anomalous effects of SCP-1499 activate when a 
human places SCP-1499 on their head. Approximately one second 
after SCP-1499 is fully secured on the subject's head, the subject 
vanishes from view, and is no longer detectable. The subject reports 
no feeling of motion at this time. Testing has revealed that two-way 
radios remain capable of both receiving and transmitting despite the 
subject being undetectable. Upon wearing SCP-1499, test subjects 
report completely different surroundings than they were in prior to 
wearing SCP-1499. Subjects have reported that it appears barren 
and inhospitable, with tall black towers filling the area. Subjects have 
also sighted entities in this landscape. These entities, designated 
SCP-1499-1, have been described as tall, nude humanoids with 
dark skin that has a thick coat of an unknown viscous substance. 
Instances of SCP-1499-1 also have large amounts of eyes and 
mouths covering their body. Upon removing SCP-1499 from their 
head, subjects reappear in the same location they were in when 
they put it on. For more information, see Test Log 1499. 


Tesi Subject Reporied evenis Notes 


D-67393 


Agent C 


Agent U 


Subject found herself First test involving 


in building of an SCP-1499 to 
unknown black determine its effects. 
substance. After Due to the risk of 
surveying the room forlosing SCP-1499, 
approximately 15 trained agents are to 
seconds, subject be used in place of D- 
reportedly heard Class subjects. 


sounds of movement 
and removed 
SCP-1499 ina 
panicked state, 
reappearing in the test 


chamber. 
Agent found himself in First sighting of 
the same room SCP-1499-1. Agent 


described by D-67393.C reports that he 
Approximately two remained undetected 
minutes were spent |_ by the two instances 
exploring the room, | of SCP-1499-1. 
which Agent C 

reports contained 

multiple hollow black 

cubes. Agent was 

capable of descending 

down the building 

without running into 

any interference. 

Upon reaching the 

second floor, agent 

heard sounds from the 

floor below. Agent hid 

himself behind one of 

the black cubes and 

observed two 

instances of 

SCP-1499-1. Agent 

then removed 

SCP-1499. 

Agent was selected | The structure in which 


due to her stealth 
training. Agent found 
herself in the same 
room as Agent C 
was in when he 
removed SCP-1499. 
Sounds of movement 
were heard on higher 
floors, prompting the 
agent to head 
downstairs and out of 
the building. Agent 
reportedly saw many 
instances of 
SCP-1499-1 
wandering outside of 
the building. Each 
individual seemed to 
have unique 
mutations, and 
occasionally uttered 
low, grating sounds. 
Agent successfully 
made her way past 
more of the structures 
while avoiding 
detection. Agent 
followed four 
instances of 
SCP-1499-1 for 
observation. The 
group encountered a 
fifth instance of 
SCP-1499-1, and one 
of the group stepped 
forward. Agent 
observed the two 
entities violently 
assault one another, 
coating the nearby 


D-67393 appeared 
seems to only be one 
of many. Due to the 
violent nature of 
SCP-1499-1, further 
exploration will require 
that agents be armed 
to defend themselves. 


ground and observing 
entities with unknown 
fluid and thick viscera. 
Agent removed 
SCP-1499. 
Agent K See Exploration Log} [REDACTED] 
1499-D. 


The following information has been classified until further notice. 


EXPLORATION LOG 1499- 
D: LEVEL 5 CLEARANCE REQUIRED 


Exploration Log 1499-D 


Test commences on June 3, 20 . 

Agent K _ outfitted with a two-way radio 
earpiece and a standard Foundation sidearm 
with additional ammunition. Agent's mission is 
reconnaissance. 

Agent places SCP-1499 on his head and 
vanishes from sight. 


Agent K _: "Doctor, can you hear me?" 
Dr.N :"Yes, Agent. What do you see?" 
Agent K — : "I'm between two of the structures. 


They resemble spires. Seem to be made of 
some hard black rock. Ground's the same." 
Dr.N : "Have you made contact with any 
instances of SCP-1499-1?" 

Agent K_ : "Not yet. It's hard to tell. The 
lighting here is odd, I'm having trouble seeing 
much. I'll see what | can do." 


Sounds of the agent moving quietly for 
approximately five minutes. 


Agent K :"God damn. There's a large group 
of them up ahead. They're all moving together 
into a huge building." 

Dr.N :"Can you describe the structure, 


Agent?" 

Agent K__: "Yeah, it's big. Very big. There 
aren't many structures around it. It is quite 
elaborate; | see a large amount of towers and 
spikes. There looks like there's blood on it." 
Dr.N : "Agent, can you get a closer look?" 
Agent K ___: "There's some sort of bridge to it. 
I'm moving in." 


Sounds of the agent moving quietly for 
approximately three minutes and thirty 
seconds. 


Agent K__ : "I'm at the side of the structure. 
There looks like there's some sort of door 
here. Smaller than the big one in the front. I'm 
going through it now." 


Visceral sounds are heard for a few seconds. 


Dr.N : "What was that, Agent?" 
Agent K__: "Not sure. Coming from further 
inside. I'm taking a look." 


Sounds of grating and grinding heard coming 
from multiple sources. 


Dr.N_ : "Agent? Agent, what do you see?" 
Agent K — : "Jesus- there's a lot of them in 
there. They're all in a giant group. Their 
mouths are all open, even the ones on their 
bodies. | think that sound is coming from them. 
Can you hear that?" 

Dr.N : "The sound is coming through, Agent. 
Try to get a better look." 

Agent K_: "Okay. They're all facing one 
direction. Let me see if | can look." 


Sounds of grating continues for twenty 
seconds. 


Agent K __: "They're all facing one of them 
standing on a platform. There are large 
amounts of bodies around him. They've 
stopped vocalizing and are all just looking at 
the one up front." 


Loud visceral sounds return. 


Agent K _ : "It appears the one in the front is- 
Hold on, | can't see. It's cutting open its own 
torso. There are some sort of worm-like 
creatures spilling out of it." 

Dr.N : "Agent, what is happening? | can't 
hear-" 

Agent K_ : "Wait, above its head. | think | 
see- There's something in its torso that's 
creating some sort of light. There's a beam 
going up from it into the air over his head." 
Dr.N_ : "What's happening? Agent, keep 
talking." 

Agent K — : "I think it's opening some sort of 
portal. And I- It's summoning something. The 
entity is summoning something. | think | see 
something coming through the portal- It looks 
like a massive version of one of the worms that 
came out of the entity's chest. | think the 
glowing object in that entity's torso is holding 
the portal open. I- | can't let that thing through. 
I've got to stop it." 

Dr.N_ : "Agent?" 


Sounds of the agent running and gunfire. The 
grating noise returns louder than before. 
Sounds of stone objects and bodies falling 
down. Visceral sounds fill the air. 


Agent K__ : "I've almost got-" 
More visceral sounds, closer to the agent now. 


Agent K  : "Got it now-" 


The remainder of the agent's sentence is 
unheard as he removes SCP-1499. Agent 
appears in test chamber covered in blood and 
holding a human heart. 


Agent K — : "It's alright, | got-" 


Agent looks at the heart in his hand and yells, 
dropping it. 


End of log. 


Addendum 1499-E: On Sunday, June 3rd, a man 
dressed in a suit and wearing a gas mask attacked the 
Cathedral of Christ the Savior in Moscow, Russia during 
morning services. The man reportedly shot ten people, 
including a chanter and a priest. Six church-goers were 
killed, and three others, including the chanter, are in 
critical condition. The suspect charged the front of the 
cathedral and allegedly produced a knife and removed 
the priest's heart. The suspect then appeared to vanish 
entirely before multiple witnesses. Moscow police have 
been unable to find any trace of the attacker. 


Our operatives working undercover in Russian media 
and military are currently working to defuse the situation. 
Officially, the attacker was a Nikolai Orlov, resident of 
Moscow, who was acting alone. Orlov went missing a 
few years ago, allowing our agents more time to keep 
the situation under control. Agent K _ is currently being 
detained for questioning regarding the situation. He 
maintains his claim that everything occurred as he 
reported. Our recordings of Exploration 1499-D 
corroborate his story. When questioned as to the 
reasoning behind his actions, Agent K _ stated that he 
believed that what he saw being summoned had to be 
stopped. Agent is currently scheduled for psychiatric 
evaluation. We cannot risk another incident. All testing 
involving SCP-1499 is discontinued until further notice. 
All information regarding Exploration 1499-D is to be 
restricted to personne! with Level 5 clearance until the 


situation has been brought under control.