every word: “This object is an expression of mourning, 
for your husband and my old friend. | shall tell you now 
that it must only be used for that. If it is not, then all the 
feeling, all the genius and all the grief poured into its 
construction will be misused. It'll start directing the 
energies of other ideas, thoughts that it was not 
supposed to touch. So only use it for a painting of 
beloved Elijah, my dear. If you don't, then the madness 
and darkness of a passion frustrated will run vengeful 
and free, until that feeling is all that's left.” 


And then, he quite abruptly left, before | was able to ask 
him what on earth he meant! It was all very mysterious, 
and the whole thing left me feeling a little shaken. I’m not 
sure that he was quite right in the head. But the frame is 
such a lovely piece of craftsmanship, all the same. | think 
it’s the perfect fit for that picture | painted of him a month 
before his passing. 


At this point, there is a break of several lines, before the text 
resumes. The hand appears to be the same, but with a far shakier 
grasp on the pen, believed to be due to advanced age. It is believed 
that this portion of the letter was written several decades after the 
first. 


| don’t remember this letter. | must have just forgotten 
about it, what with all the excitement of the day. | should 
have finished it, | suppose. | was rude not to. But | can’t 
pretend | really care. 


You're long dead now, Maud. | don’t think | ever saw you 
again after this. | couldn't see the point. | didn’t have to 
try any more. | didn’t have to be brave, | didn’t have to 
pretend to be happy, | didn’t have to be lonely in a crowd 
any more. | didn’t have to try. It’s just me, and him, and 
he never grew old and he always loves me. 


With love, 


Annie. 


SCP-3014: Lonely Hungry Daemon 


Item #: SCP-3014 
Object Class: Safe Euclid 


Special Containment Procedures: SCP-3014 is to be stored in a 8 
meter by 8 meter by 5 meter containment cell at Site-15. SCP-3014 
is to be given access to controlled WiFi content for 3 hours a day. At 
least 4 Level 4 Foundation IT specialists are to control the exact 
contents of the data packets sent to SCP-3014. Any information 
packets being sent to SCP-3014 are to be analyzed for any 
information that is important and could cause issues if lost. Every 
week, SCP-3014 is to interviewed to re-gain potential lost 
information. In the event that SCP-3014 does not receive proper 
information, all forms of internet access within 100 meters of 
SCP-3014 and its cell are to be destroyed. 


The content to be given to SCP-3014 is to be automatically 
generated fictional stories generated by Al sources. Stories are to 
not contain any important information relating to science, history, 
culture, or any other well-known concept in case an antimemetic 
event occurs. 


As of Incident 3014-3, At least 2 guards armed with light explosive 
weaponry are to remain near SCP-3014 and its cell at all times. 
Personnel are not to be allowed to communicate with SCP-3014 
unless given permission by the current lead researcher on duty for 
SCP-3014. Bimonthly, SCP-3014 is to be given a psychological 
evaluation by the current lead researcher of SCP-3014. Any 
requests for extra equipment capable of sending or receiving signals 
is to be denied without review. 


The use of SCP-3014 to contain digital anomalies, specifically 
memetic, is under consideration. 


Description: SCP-3014 is a sapient hexapod robotic construct of 


unknown origin. The entity’s body is segmented into 3 separate 
spherical pieces, each roughly with a diameter of 0.5 meters and 
two legs that are approximately 2 meters long at full extension. 


The entity possesses an rear antenna of a design beyond current 
understanding. It appears similar to human designs, however near 
the tip of the antenna is a large crystal of unknown composition that 
seems to be fractured in half. Sampling proves the crystals structure 
to be similar to that of diamond. According to SCP-3014, it is broken, 
and previously could broadcast information faster than light, but this 
has not been confirmed. Analysis of replication of the antenna for 
Foundation use is being considered. 


SCP-3014 was recovered after several hundred residents of ; 
UK reported weak internet connection. When civilian internet service 
providers investigated, they discovered SCP-3014. Foundation 
Agents in the area took over, and discovered SCP-3014 was 
attempting to construct a form of communication array but was 
lacking the needed tools and parts. The entity was forcefully 
contained. Damage and internet outages were later blamed ona 
severe storm, and amnestics were properly distributed. 


The frontmost segment of SCP-3014 is considered the head of the 
entity. Sticking out of the head is a small square screen about 1 
meter long. The entity uses this to communicate. 


SCP-3014 is composed of an unknown material. Due to the extreme 
strength and density of the material, sampling and internal imaging 
has proven difficult. The tests that have been performed show 
similarities to carbon nanotubes, although of a much more advanced 
design. 


SCP-3014 appears to take in information that is in the form of 
wireless internet networking. SCP-3014 claims that it "consumes" 
this data. The entity requires roughly 500 megabytes of data per 24 
hours to preserve normal function. The information that SCP-3014 
consumes is memorized and permanently stored. SCP-3014 has 
learned, from internet access, human language and grammar to a 
high degree. However, the entity prefers to type in short incomplete 
sentences because, according to the entity, it is more comfortable to 
speak as it is similar to its original language. 


Upon consumption of data, there is an estimated 56% chance that 
the data gains temporary antimemetic properties. SCP-3014 claims 
that this is "digestion problems." The majority of sapient beings who 
know the content (being video, audio, text or otherwise) begin to 
forget it and suffer extreme difficulty trying to remember the data if 
shown again. In rare cases, digitally stored versions of this content 
will be completely deleted or expunged. This effect will last anytime 
from 16 hours to months. In emergency situations, SCP-3014 can 
consume stored content. If this occurs, the antimemetic effects are 
permanent, and extend it SCP-3014 itself. 


The content of the data that SCP-3014 has consumed is relevant. 
SCP-3014 claims that data that reveals more important or 
interesting information is more "tasty" and that uninteresting data is 
"pland and tasteless." SCP-3014 refuses to consume data that is a 
repeat of previous information or very similar to previous 
information, claiming it to be "disgusting." 


If SCP-3014 does not receive its required information, it may begin 
to attempt to forcefully consume information, breaking through 
information firewalls with relative ease. When this occurs, the rate of 
antimemetic events increases to 90%, as well as the duration 
appearing infinite. It is unknown if this has ever occurred, or if 
[REDACTED]. Additional effects of this are unknown due to 
information loss. 


If the entity has not been fed for an extended amount of time, 
information that SCP-3014 has consumed may begin to re-appear. 
However, this information will still be antimemetic. In addition, data 
stored near this antimemetic information may also begin to take on 
antimemetic qualities, which can spread. This can be solved by 
deleting the information, but this can prove difficult due to the nature 
of antimemetics. 


Document 3014-1: List of requests from SCP-3014 
+ Show Document 3014-1 


The following is a incomplete list of requests that 
SCP-3014 has asked for. 


Request Response 


“faster internet?” Granted 

"my friends?" Denied - Identity of "friends" 
is unknown. 

"fix antenna?" Denied - Beyond 


technological capabilities, 
as well as potentially being 
a security risk 


“human friend?” Granted 
“my friends please?” Denied 
“wake friends up” Meaning unknown 


Various pieces of radio, wifi, Denied 
and communication 
equipment 


Document 3014-2: Interview 3014-68 
+ Show Document 3014-2 
Interviewed: SCP-3014 


Interviewer: SCP-3014 Lead Researcher Dr. 


Foreword: This is the first interview in which 
the entity reported being depressed. 


<Begin Log> 


Dr. : Greetings SCP-3014, how are you 
feeling? 


SCP-3014: sad. 
Dr. |: <pause> And why is that? 
SCP-3014: friends gone. 


Dr. :Whoare your friends? Where are 
they? 


SCP-3014: one changes worlds. one fights. 


one builds. i speak to father. so many others. 
together so long. through space. not for here. 
somewhere else. 


Dr. : <pause> This is the first time you've 
divulged this information to us, SCP-3014. 
What- 


SCP-3014: father went away. maybe dead. 
friends gone. we landed here. separated. i 
knew where. but i was so hungry... 
<SCP-3014 begins to curl> 


<End Log> 


Closing Statement: SCP-3014 refused to 
speak for the next 3 interview sessions. 
SCP-3014 requested data involving 
communication equipment, which was denied. 


Document 3014-3: Incident 3014-3 
+ Show Document 3014-3 


On / /20 ,acontainment breach occurred at Site- , 
where SCP-3014 was temporarily being contained while 
being transported. SCP-3014 was compliant with 
Foundation personnel and remained in its cell. However, 
a power outage occurred and due to wreckage the wing 
of the site in which SCP-3014 was contained was 
isolated for 12 days. After 3 days, SCP-3014 became 
less friendly and began to act agitated despite not losing 
any apparent function. After 5 days of not being fed, 
SCP-3014 began to make threats of physical harm 
towards Foundation personnel. After 8 days, SCP-3014 
began emitting an unknown extremely radioactive 
material and physically attacking Foundation personnel. 


[REDACTED] 


Remaining security cameras show SCP-3014 attempting 


to use the debris to construct a long range 
communication system from stored information. 
SCP-3014 was contained before it could complete, but 
modified computer terminals show the message the 
SCP-3014 was attempting to broadcast. It contained 
fragments of SCP-3014's language. Also connected 
were the exact coordinates of several Foundation 
facilities. 


my friends. [unintelligible] 


i miss you. its been so long. 
[unintelligible] 


[unintelligible] the fathers. they won't come. 
so many sleeping. wake up. 
please. wherever you are. 


[unintelligible] meet with me. 
together. 


SCP-3014 is to be reclassified from Safe to Euclid. 


SCP-3015: A Story Concerning Self-Doubt, Slight 
Disillusionment, and Frustration, As Told By the 
Lucky Member of a Group Whose Relatable Works 
Are Loved Internationally 


Item #: SCP-3015 
Object Class: Safe 


Special Containment Procedures: SCP-3015 is kept in an 
anomalous item cell at Site-—88. Only authorized Mobile Task 
Forces and other authorized personnel are allowed to use the 
activation phrase in a 20m radius around SCP-3015. The building 
where SCP-3015 leads to, temporarily deemed Site-2161, is to be 
checked whenever any new, sizable information about GoI-5869 
("Gamers Against Weed") is obtained. Mobile Task Forces and 
other personnel are instructed to apprehend and interview any 
members, anomalies, and/or information related to Gamers Against 
Weed. 


Description: SCP-3015 is a non-sentient humanoid construct that 
does not match any known individual from missing person 
databases. It is not capable of movement, sound, or automation until 
its activation phrase is spoken in a 20m radius around it. A 
handwritten document, Document 3015-E, can be found in the right 
jeans pocket of SCP-3015, consistent with other Gamers Against 
Weed anomalies of a similar nature. 


When the activation phrase, "Feel the burn", is spoken in a 20m 
radius around SCP-3015, it will turn so that its back is facing the 
speaker, then bend over and pull its buttocks apart to reveal an 
extradimensional portal that leads to an abandoned safehouse 
located in Springfield, Massachusetts. Only one person is able to go 
through SCP-3015 at a time. More than one person attempting to go 
through at once has resulted in moderate injury including, but not 
limited to; circulation injuries, pressure bruises, temporal dislocation, 


« SCP-363 | SCP-364 | SCP-365 » 


and hairline fractures. 


Addendum: Documents 3015-A through D were recovered from a 
desktop left at the safehouse. Most programs and documentation 
are presumed to have been erased. All documentation is most likely 
written by Pol-6877 ("jockjamsvol6"). For a full list of information 
recovered, see Gol-5869 ("Gamers Against Weed") Recovered 
Documentation. 


Document 3015-A: 


Yeah kkrule, | Know; Dahlia told me about it. And no, of 
course it's not a Mister. That would be wild as fuck, but 
no. | didn't it find it too funny anyhow. I'm almost never 
on at the same time as you but if | were, | would have 
probably told you it sucked, but that's only because I'm 
bitter you did Bernie first. 


| guess I'm just a bit ticked you know. But it's fine, no 
reason why | just can't finish Bernie anyway. Find a soul 
and everything for this sexy fucking dude. | wanted to 
make this dude have others disappear up their own 
asses, but the more | think about it, the more | realize 
that's actually kinda fucked. So what am | even 
supposed to do? | got an old man who's a stud with 
nothing occupying his actual being. It's just standing here 
all weird. Whatever. 


[Why am | even writing you a PM when | don't even know 
you? You're not really a buddy, just some memester, so 
fuck me | guess.]8 


So basically; no, I'm not sending you him, but I'll show 
him off in the chat. 


Document 3015-B: 


Hey Jude. | know we were talking about that idea for 
Bernie, and I'm ditching that whole "people go up their 
own asses" thing. What if people go up his ass instead? 
That's way funnier and still gross but at least no one's 


getting hurt, | guess? | still need your help with that, if 
you're able to swing it. 


I'm still sort of annoyed that | can't come up with anything 
else for this. Fuck me, did kkrule just take my goddamn 
ideas too while he was at it? Even his name is just 
pissing me off every time | see him brought up in chat. 
It's definitely an irrational thing, which is 100% why I'm 
wallowing in it. Considering just letting Mr. Bernie 
Sanders be without some dude's soul. It's funnier that 
way, actually. Imagine this for me; you say the thing, and 
he turns around. Then he just opens up his asshole and 
reveals a location to Bumfucknowhere, Tolerant Left 
State. FUCK DUDE. The epitome of comedy. Gog. 
(Another finely-aged, impeccable meme.) 


| think this is gonna be my only involvement with the 
whole Misters joke when we finish it up anyway. "Haha, 
what if we made our own Misters?" I, JJ, definitely said 
out loud to myself, all smarmy. It was a good joke and a 
good list that is objectively the funniest thing on Earth. 
"Now let's go make these Misters!" everyone else said, 
and | just lost the plot of the joke. It's not really funny 
when we do the thing that we railed on another group for 
doing the thing for. "But it's fine, I'll do Bernie" | said, 
innuendo fully intended. And then. Shit. | don't hate 
kkrule even, | just sort of hate myself for not thinking of it 
first? 


Whatever, you don't need to listen to me dump shit on 
you. Here's a picture of good old Bernie; | think I'm 
done toying around with his look. A car drove by, and 
they probably thought this dude standing perfectly still 
was my dad. No one else drove by at least, because 
almost no one else bothers to drive down this road. I'll be 
so fucking happy to move out of here, you have no idea. 
At least it's not Rich White Guy Asshole Island Martha's 
Vineyard.