On / /200 , Foundation personnel used a remote-controlled device 
to extract a sample of SCP-305’s rock structure. SCP-305 began to 
emit loud grinding noises and a low growling sound. Existing cracks 
in the rock formation deepened and several new ones formed in the 
vicinity of the removed rock sample. SCP-305 then moved its "arms" 
upward slightly and slid one foot, about ten centimeters, across the 
ground as if taking a step, shedding rock-fragments as it moved 
before returning to its stationary state. Following this event, the 
range of SCP-305’s psychic influence tripled, resulting in several 
[DATA EXPUNGED]. Sample proved to be ordinary sedimentary 
rock, consistent with the surrounding area. 


Follow up X-ray scans of the formation itself reveal the presence of 
[REDACTED], suggesting that the "rock formation" may actually be 
an imprisoned instance of [DATA EXPUNGED]. 


At this time, Proposal L109 "Wrath of God" has been selected to 
combat SCP-2680, to this end, Overwatch has mandated assets 
across the continental United States to prepare for mass quarantine, 
disinfection, and sterilization campaigns, with all Foundation 
weapons research and development assets directed to accelerate 
the production of prototype 'thermobaric weaponry’ and air- 
dispersed amnestic compounds. 


Nota Bene 16/01/1919 


Being that the production, distribution, and sale of commercial 
alcohol across the United States have been effectively banned by 
the successful passage and ratification of the Eighteenth 
Amendment to the United States Constitution, thus inadvertently 
curtailing the spread of SCP-2680, Proposal L109 has been 
cancelled, with the aim of directing all otherwise-engaged 
Foundation resources to develop a remedy for SCP-2680. 


Containment efforts are to concentrate on the total eradication of 
SCP-2680 within any remaining pockets of resistance, such as 
criminal organizations that have stockpiled alcohol. Commercial 
alcohol-producing companies, criminal organizations, bootlegging 
groups and speakeasies are to be supplied with information and 
equipment to produce Agent Salk and brew beverages unaffected 
by SCP-2680, while Foundation assets in the United States 
government are directed to take all possible actions to hinder 
communication, centralization, and transparency between federal 
and state authorities to encourage the spread of unaffected 
beverages. 


A moratorium has been placed on all operations against the Chicago 
Spirit, such that all of their activities within the continental United 
States remain wholly unmolested; Foundation assets within the 
United States must make all possible efforts to assist the Chicago 
Spirit in all possible manners, such as avoiding law enforcement, 
unless Foundation assets and personnel elsewhere may be 
compromised or harmed as a result of their activities. Joint Team I-3 
("Rum Runners"), composed of members of former Investigative 
Team K-3 and the Chicago Spirit, has been formed to encourage the 
spread of information and supplies, including Agent Salk, for safe 
brewing within the anomalous community, and locate and euthanize 


any remaining instances of SCP-2680-1 (according to Protocol I-17). 


Description: SCP-2680 is an anomalous form of ethyl alcohol that 
when imbibed, causes the development of an anomalous form of 
smallpox, with similar symptoms such as the formation of irregular 
pustules, inflamed spots, lassitude, and delirium, though there are 
three key differences: One, the disease's causative agent is a form 
of alcohol rather than anomalous variant of Variolae; Two, though 
near-identical to smallpox, the disease is not fatal on its own and 
wholly survivable by otherwise healthy individuals; Three, the 
composition of the pustules is a mixture of SCP-2680, pus, and 
trace amounts of lead and hydrargyrum. 


In addition to developing symptoms of smallpox, victims of 
SCP-2680 (hereby designated SCP-2680-1) develop a chronic urge 
to pick at and eat their own skin, storing it within their digestive tracts 
until a period of three-to-six weeks has elapsed, following which the 
instance will defecate a mass of dead skin that has taken on the 
shape and texture of a glass bottle. Following expulsion of the 
cancerous mass, the instance will hold it to their sores and pinch 
and burst their own pustules to fill the mass up with fluid, 
concurrently resulting in the gradual recession of the symptoms of 
SCP-2680 in the victim; it is vital to note that this does not in fact 
cure the disease, the symptoms of which presently resurge after a 
period of twenty-four hours. SCP-2680-1 instances are able to 
recognize the anomaly, but refuse to combat the urge, citing either 
the brief respite from the malady or a delusion that eventually they 
will be cured by the process, to the point that several instances, 
under the belief that the SCP-2680 mixture stored within the mass 
cured their illness, have sought to expose as many people to the 
fluid as possible. 


Update 08/10/1918: An instance of SCP-2680-1 working at a 
distillery in , Minnesota contaminated the plant with SCP-2680, 
spreading the disease to the neighboring towns. In total, 453 
instances had to be euthanized and much of the county was 
subjected to flame-based countermeasures (publicly disseminated 
as a wildfire). Efforts are ongoing to minimize potential repeats of 
this incident elsewhere in the United States. 


Update 15/06/1919: Testing of [REDACTED], combined with silica 


and mixed with alcohol, has proven efficacious in eliminating and 
preventing SCP-2680 infection in 99% of all test subjects. Efforts to 
scale up production of the substance are underway. 


Activities of the Chicago Spirit 

During the time this testimony was produced, the 
Foundation and Chicago Spirit were collaborating to halt 
the spread of SCP-2680. This testimony was recorded in 
1926, and belongs to Roland MacDell, a former 
consigliere in the Chicago Spirit, who oversaw 
bootlegging operations within the Northwest United 
States. 


Let me get one thing right clear - | don't deal with 'normal' 
brewing. You wanna hear about that, you find someone 
else. My job's to make sure all the... funnies out here are 
using our stuff. 


The easy part's handing out the hooch. Cops won't do 
squat to stop us, and if some dick tries, well, you an’ the 
boss take care of 'em. All we hafta do is make sure our 
speakeasies brewed with the stuff you bulls were 
handing out. We bring the booze, we bring the brewing 
kit, they take it. They sell it, they brew it, people buy it. | 
ain't actually saying it's sunshine and roses though... 
thanks to you lot. 


Word got around fast that we were working with the 
fuckin’ cops. When we first, ah, partnered with your 
enterprise, it took us weeks to even get our own boys on 
board, forget about all the speakeasies. ‘Till twenty-two, 
actually what we hadda do was bring in a buncha drink 
from Canada and lace it, real quiet-like, with your stuff. 
Whaddya call it, Agent Sock? We had a whole operation 
going on. Labels from the Krauts, bottles from the Brits... 
and the, uh, piece de resistance was the brand name. 
Gordon's Gin. Best dry gin on God's green earth. ‘Course 
you can't actually find any real Gordon's in the whole 
damn USA. At least... not from the normal guys. But we 
ain't the normal guys. We got truckloads of Gordon's, 
laced it with your sock, and sent it off. Nobody else was 


gonna get these folks Gordon's, so it was either deal with 
the juice or no Gordon's. Course, it helped that the folks 
drinking Gordon's were the only ones not turning into 
booze-filled blisters. So once everyone realized that 
yeah, your funny juice was helping them not get 
beerpoxed, we didn't need to worry about Gordon's. All 
we had to worry about was the competition. 


We're the biggest... semi-ethical associates... in the 
States, but not the only ones, yanno. We got all sorts 
tryna come in and get a piece of that rum cake, you 
know what I'm saying. Snakes, leadheads, all those 
magic bimbos. The hell you do to 'em anyways? They're 
real stuck on bumping you lot off. Wasn't till we buddied 
up with ya that they got real testy 'bout us. Actin’ real 
tough, tryna threaten us and run us out of town with their 
fancy tricks and lightshows. | tell you though, magic don't 
mean squat when you're staring down the barrel of a 
Thompson. You knows Portlands, yea, we had one of 
our biggest joints this side o' the Mississippi. Last winter 
we got raided by the leadheads. Folks are handin' out 
dog hairs and havin' a grand old time and suddenly the 
door gets blown right off the fuckin’ hinges. Buncha 
leadheads stormed in - they'd turned their fuckin’ arms 
into gats. 


Lost twelve of our guys that night. | dunno if the 
leadheads had some beef or were just torpedoes but that 
didn't matter for shit. They'd tried to fuck us over. We 
couldn't just bump em... we hadda send a message. So 
what we did was roll right back on them. Boss was there 
personally. We knew where the bastards were holed up 
and all we had to do was knock. And we knocked all 
right. We stormed in there, introduced the goons on the 
first floor to our choppers, and went right knocking on the 
big cheese's door. Bastard was sitting Indian style on the 
floor, and the boss just smashed this barrel over his 
head. Somehow boss got his hands on a barrel fulla 
some kinda acid. Hy-dro-flow-summat. The leadhead 
melted like a stick a' butter. Boss made bar trophies 


outta what was left. 


Bar trophies. Goons with guns for arms. Magic oozing 
out of people's goddamn assholes. That's how the game 
works, you dig? Every day we get scumbags trying to 
muscle in on our turf and trying to turn us into rabbits or 
whatever the fuck else. We deal with them, and we 
provide a public service to the people. That's real 
Chicago Spirit. 


Look, | ain't just gonna tell you 'bout everything we did. 
I'm no sap - we both know that once this shit is done, you 
lot are going to try and bull in on us. Probably half the 
guns you gave us'll blow up like Kraut mines. Just 
remember the leadheads next time you come knocking. 
The Spirit's the biggest outfit this side of the Atlantic. 
Whatever the fuck you try to pull, we can pull right back. 


Item #: SCP-2680 
Object Class: Euclid Keter 


Special Containment Procedures: One instance of SCP-2680 is 
currently contained at Site-75. It is to be stored within a standard 
Biological Anomaly Storage Cube within a standard Biological 
Storage Cell. One instance of SCP-2680-1 is contained at Site-75 
within a Biological Storage Cell that has been modified for human 
habitation. Once per eight hours, three D-Class Capsule Rations are 
to be delivered through the Rations Transference Device. 


No alcoholic beverage of any kind is to be consumed, stored, or 
otherwise allowed within five kilometers of Site-75. No glass bottles 
of any kind are allowed within five kilometers of Site-75. If glass 
bottles are seen within the exclusion zone of Site-75, they must 
immediately be incinerated by crew following Bio-safety Level 4 
Procedures. If personnel displaying symptoms of inebriation are 
observed, physical contact should not be made, and they must 
immediately be reported to Site Security. 


Mobile Task Forces Kappa-3 ("Teetotalers"), Beta-7 ("Maz Hatters"), 


and Lambda-12 ("Pest Control") have been deployed to investigate 
and curb SCP-2680 infections in the wild. Research is underway to 
develop a vaccine or preventative for SCP-2680. 


All Foundation personnel are encouraged to avoid consuming 
alcoholic beverages any kind of packaged beverage that they have 
not physically extracted from packaging such as a cardboard box or 
six pack ring. 


Description: SCP-2680 is an unidentified species of macrovirus, 
tentatively placed in the order Retroviridae, that resembles bottles of 
various types of alcoholic beverages, most commonly Bud Light and 
Coors Light beer. The "bottle" and "bottlecap" are composed of silica 
and anomalous forms of keratin that mimic the properties of soda- 
lime glass, labeled paper, and metal crown cork bottle caps. The 
liquid inside the bottle mimics the physical properties of alcohol 
(dependent on the brand mimicked), but is actually a solution 
composed of water, stem cells, xylitol, proteins, and RNA. 


When the liquid is consumed by a human, it causes intoxicating 
effects analogous to consuming a similar amount of alcohol. The 
liquid then instigates a series of physiological changes in the human 
body, catalyzing the dissolution and widening of the esophageal 
tract and converting excess esophageal tissue into specialized 
glands that produce SCP-2680 fluid. 


Infected persons (designated SCP-2680-1) develop 
dermatillomania, dermatophagia, and rumination syndrome. Over a 
period of three-to-six weeks, infected persons gradually consume 
the skin around their digits, limbs, and torso. 


Once six weeks have passed, instances of SCP-2680-1 will 
regurgitate the consumed dermal tissue as the ‘bottle’, ‘label’ and 
‘pottlecap' of SCP-2680, before regurgitating SCP-2680 fluid into the 
‘bottle’. Instances of SCP-2680-1 are able to produce up to six 
instances of SCP-2680 at a time. Once the last bottle has been 
regurgitated, the cycle of consumption and regurgitation will restart. 
During the final process of regurgitation, SCP-2680-1 instances 
experience anterograde amnesia, with the result that they believe 
the produced instances of SCP-2680 to be store-bought alcohol. 


Instances of SCP-2680-1 do not appear to be under any anomalous 
compulsion to perform these actions, and can be conditioned and 
trained to stop. However, most instances resist treatment and prefer 
to keep their disease secret. 


Addendum 2680-1: 


On / / ,a Protestant community was discovered in , tobe 
completely infested by SCP-2680. Among the infected were children 
approximately and _ years old, producing SCP-2680 in the form of 
Coca-Cola and Fanta-brand glass bottles of soda. In light of this 
revelation, SCP-2680 has been classified as Keter. Mobile Task 
Force Kappa-3 have updated their investigation protocols 
accordingly, and Mobile Task Forces Beta-7 ("Maz Hatters") and 
Lambda-12 ("Pest Control") have been assigned to aid Kappa-3. 


« SCP-2679 | SCP-2680 | SCP-2681 » 


SCP-2681: Animal Man 


Item #: SCP-2681 
Object Class: Euclid 


Special Containment Procedures: SCP-2681 is to be contained in 
a standard humanoid containment cell in Site .SCP-2681 may only 
be removed from its cell by level 2 personnel or higher. Subject's 
basic needs are to be maintained at all times to prevent the 
compulsion of SCP-2681-1 instances. Any instances of SCP-2681-1 
that attempt to enter the facility are to be sedated immediately and 
brought into the facility for study. Every 48 hours, SCP-2681 must 
undergo personal therapy lasting anywhere between 1-3 hours. 


SCP-2681's cell should be monitored at all times via security 
camera. Should the subject show signs of emotional instability, an 
approved psychologist is to be alerted immediately. If a psychologist 
is not available, SCP-2681 is to be sedated. 


Description: SCP-2681 is a 30 year old human male of Nepali 
origin whose emotional state, thoughts, and needs compel the 
behavior of nonhuman animals (thereafter referred to as instances 
of SCP-2681-1) within a 1.7 kilometer radius. This results in 
compelled animals attempting to meet the desires and needs of 
SCP-2681. Prior to its containment, SCP-2681 had reported animals 
giving it carcasses when hungry, grooming or cleaning it when 
feeling dirty, and even attacking and killing sources of its anger, fear, 
and discomfort (See Testing Log). SCP-2681 does not seem 
capable of compelling insects, arachnids, or microorganisms. Tests 
to see if SCP-2681 is capable of compelling sea animals are 
currently pending.