¢ Urvi Singh - Wife (Deceased) 
¢ Arti Singh - Daughter 


Reason for Interest: Dr Singh trained to be a general 
practitioner of medicine in the United Kingdom's National 
Health Service. Dr Singh's performance in aiding patients 
began to fall, prompting him to move to the United States 
of America. 


Using his medical knowledge, Dr Singh set up his own 
private sector health clinic "Singh's Hospice", caring for 
those thought to be terminally ill. Paradoxically, Singh's 
survival rates for these patients matches and in some 
areas, exceeds, his specialist peers. 


Update - / / : Survival rates assumed to be the 
effects of SCP-3441. Post interview and amnestication of 
Dr Singh, POI status revoked. 


Addendum B: 


Interview Transcript 


Interviewee: Dr Viraj Singh 


Interviewer: Reseacher 


<Begin Log> 


: Hello there, Dr Singh. I'd like to ask you a few 
questions, is that alright? 


Singh: Yeah, | don't mind. Try and keep it short though, 
I've got patients to handle. 


: Of course. I'll try to cut to the chase. Why did you 
open up the hospice? 


Singh: | thought my skills would be better put in hospice 
care, rather than the NHS. I'd like to get to know my 
patients, rather than see them for five minutes. 


A branch retrieved from SCP-3441 is placed in front of 
Dr Singh 


: Do you recognise this object? 
Singh: Where did you find this? 

: We found it among your personal items. We believe 
you have been utilising this item to aid your patients. Is 
this correct? 


Dr Singh remains silent 


: When did you become aware of this plant's 
anomalous properties? 


Dr Singh sighs 


Singh: So, you're taking that plant away from me, aren't 
you? 


: Unfortunately, yes. 
Dr Singh pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs 


Singh: | figured it out years ago. | noticed a pattern 
emerging. When | tried to help someone who was almost 
certainly going to recover soon, they remained ill for 
weeks. When | walked, | would trip more often, things 
would break more easily. At first, | thought | was cursed. 


Dr Singh pauses 


Singh: But then | realised that | wasn't cursed, it only 
happened when | drank homebrewed tea from my pet 
plant. 


: How effective has the tea been in your medical 


performance? 


Singh: It gives and takes. If you use it on a person that's 
getting better they're more likely to become sick again. 
But the sicker the person, the more likely they are to be 
cured. This is why | opened a hospice, you understand? 
For those with a very, very low chance to live get the 
most benefit from the tea. 


Dr Singh picks up the SCP-3441 branch 


Singh: Before every procedure | took a cup of tea from 
this plant. | don't do anything more than give them their 
medicine, change their IV drips and clean their 
bedsheets. I've compared myself with other doctors, | 
don't do anything special. My patients live while theirs 
die. 


Dr Singh sighs and places the SCP-3441 branch down 


Singh: | can't tell where my skill starts and that plant 
ends. | don't even know if I'm qualified to be a doctor 
anymore. | don't think | deserve to be, at any rate. 


: Care to explain? 


Singh: Do you deserve to be a researcher, sir? How do 
you know? You prove it to yourself by reflecting on your 
projects. When you drink the tea your skill becomes 
irrelevant. You'll never know what parts were you and 
which parts were the plant. 


Dr Singh pauses briefly 


Singh: All | do now is care for people and pray that they 
live. Nothing fancy, nothing special. It's just luck. 


: If you seriously doubted your skills, couldn't you stop 
drinking the tea? 


Singh: | can't say | haven't thought about it, but how 
could |? | took an oath to try to help everyone to the best 


Document 446-1-A 


Medical Examination of: SCP-446 
Conducted by: Dr. 


Subject is female. Physical characteristics noted as being consistent 
with the description in the primary SCP documentation. The subject 
is nude and reclined on the table. Also as noted in the 
documentation, the subject's eyes follow me as | move about the 
examination room. 


Although it is unclear whether or not this subject is "alive" given the 
lack of respiratory and cardiopulmonary functions, this examination 
will be conducted in the manner of an autopsy in order to gain as 
much insight as possible, insofar as the subject is not significantly 
damaged. 


The body is warm to the touch. There is no sign of rigor mortis or 
livor mortis. The neck, torso, and extremities show no signs of injury 
or trauma. The skin is smooth and undamaged. Of particular note is 
the clarity of the facial skin; there are no blemishes nor any sign of 
past injury. The scalp hair is brown and the hair color is natural and 
uniform throughout. Moving on to the eyes, the irises are blue and 
the pupils are equal, measuring 0.5cm in diameter. It should be 
noted that the pupils’ size is constant regardless of light intensity 
and the subject does not blink even when the surface of the eye is 
touched. The corneae are clear and there are no signs of petechiae 
in the sclerae or conjunctivae. 


Examination of the mouth by penlight reveals a blockage at the top 
of the throat. The opening is completely covered by a metal plate 
that appears to be bonded to the sides all the way around. It shifts 
slightly when pushed but does not dislodge. Similar blockages are 
observed in the ear canals, nostrils, genitalia, and anus. 


Now on to the internal examination. X-rays previously taken of the 


of my ability. Who do | decide to test it on? Tom, the 
child with leukaemia, bed-ridden for life? That kid's got 
more life in him than you or me. Or George, the old man 
with a brain tumor who can hardly speak? When he 
listens to you talk about your day, you know he cares. | 
could go on for days... 


Dr Singh pauses 


Singh: | can't put these people at risk for my own peace 
of mind. I'd sooner die myself. 


<End Log> 


Post-script: Dr Singh was released from Foundation 
custody and amnesticised after this interview. Dr Singh 
was returned to the United Kingdom and enrolled in his 
prior position. Dr Singh's business prospects in the USA 
have been shut down permanently and assets liquidated. 
Compensation has been sent to Dr Singh under the 
guise of tax errors, spanning over a decade as to not 
arouse suspicion. 


Update- / / : Observations of Dr Singh post-release 
have shown no deviations from the norm in terms of 
performance. 


Footnotes 
1. Commonly known as the "tea plant", "tea shrub" or "tea tree" 


SCP-3442: Innovative and Synergistic Customer- 
Directed Actualization 


Item #: SCP-3442 
Object Class: Keter 


Special Containment Procedures: MTF Delta-19 ("All the Keynes' 
Men") is to monitor business-focused magazines, management 
science conferences, and the personal websites of popular business 
gurus for evidence of SCP-3442. The output of prominent academic 
presses is to be analyzed for information that may lead readers 
toward the realization of SCP-3442. 


Popular management information systems are to be compromised 
and automatically monitored for signs of large-scale reorganizations. 
The earnings reports of publicly traded companies are to be 
analyzed for statistically significant decreases in profit (p < .005) 
compared to the wider economy. Any online content containing at 
least 50% of an SCP-3442 instance is to be removed immediately, 
and individuals involved in uploading said content are to be 
questioned when possible. 


Individuals who demonstrate knowledge of SCP-3442 are to be 
administered a Class-B amnestic. Any infected organization is to be 
reorganized following employee treatment, preferably to the relevant 
industry's standard. Shrines constructed in the course of an 
SCP-3442 infection are to be dismantled and transported to Site-82 
for processing. Non-critical Site-82 personnel are to be administered 
Class-C amnestics on a rotating basis to reduce the risk of intuitive 
infection. 


Description: SCP-3442 is a method of arranging entities! within a 
larger organization. To date, only profit-focused organizations have 
been identified as being affected. No anomalous qualities or 
knowledge are necessary for the spontaneous conception of 
SCP-3442, which has been identified in 51 distinct forms to date. 


This organizational structure is extremely inefficient when judged by 
modern standards, resulting in decreased productivity within the 
range of 50-80% once implemented. This effect is consistent across 
a wide variety of businesses differing in size, specialty, and previous 
structure. Predictive analysis indicates that failure to contain a single 
SCP-3442 instance could lead to a complete collapse of the global 
economy within six months. A partial summary of traits shared by 
varieties of SCP-3442 follows: 


ALERT: INFOHAZARD 
RISK 


DO NOT CONTINUE IF YOU EXPERIENCE ANY OF THE 
FOLLOWING: 
PROPENSITY TO SPECULATE, INTENSE CURIOSITY, OR 
OBSESSIVE TIDINESS 


[OPEN SUMMARY] 


1. At least three entities are each subordinate to at least 
two other entities while simultaneously managing two 
separate entities. 


2. At least five entities with overlapping or shared 
responsibilities that report to different managing entities. 


3. At least one entity providing critical services 
exclusively to the entity managing its manager. 


4. At least one instance of two entities being positioned 
to manage each other while being separated by no fewer 
than three intermediaries. 


5. At least one entity is fired or dissolved in the process 


of reorganization. A separate entity with previously 
unrelated responsibilities is inserted into the former 
entity's position. 


Documents bearing text, diagrams, or other means of depicting the 
entirety of SCP-3442 condition observers to believe that the 
organizational structure is highly efficient, even in cases where 
individuals are unable to understand the structure itself. Similar 
effects are experienced by individuals who conceive SCP-3442 
without external stimulus. Typical vectors of infection include board 
meetings, PowerPoint slides, and sessions of mandatory training. 


Organizations infected by SCP-34422 transition through three 
developmental stages: 


Stage 1: Infected organizations continue to operate normally during 
the transition process. Decreased efficiency is explained as being a 
result of employees readjusting to the new structure. Motivational 
posters are disseminated physically and electronically in attempts to 
raise morale. The frequency of potlucks and other office parties 
increases at varied rates. Casual Fridays are implemented 
immediately in 94% of cases. This stage lasts approximately 3 
months. 


Stage 2: Decreases in efficiency begin to plateau at this stage. 
Stockholders and other external figures are infected with SCP-3442 
during justifications for structural changes. Reported thefts of office 
supplies increase steadily. The rate of absenteeism following lunch 
breaks increases at a similar pace. Anomalous activity occurs at 
above-average rates in the proximity of infected workplaces, 
typically in the forms of disembodied speech, spontaneous matter 
transmutation, and minor electrical abnormalities. This stage lasts 
approximately 4 months. 


Stage 3: Shrines constructed out of office supplies are unveiled in 
lobbies, gardens, and other public spaces. All SCP-3442 shrines 
contain a seat constructed from sheafs of documents, a spear 
formed by bound bundles of pens, and a water cooler. Organized 
ceremonies are conducted by employees during standard work 
hours, all of which incorporate the act of dosing water with ink prior 
to consumption. Regions containing SCP-3442 shrines experience 


above-average rates of mass hysteria, especially pertaining to 
economic issues. Inordinate drops in stock prices, runs on banks, 
and instances of sustenance looting have all been regularly 
observed in affected regions, even in cases where the infected 
organization is relatively unimportant. In addition to the increasing 
intensity of Stage 2 anomalous activity, rains of Roman siliqua$ 
occur frequently within the proximity of SCP-3442 shrines. No 
subsequent stage of infection has been observed. 


Theological analysis of services conducted during Stage 3 infection 
has failed to establish a clear connection to any known religion, cult, 
or other group of interest. Small-scale tests have failed to produce 
any further insight into the entity implied to exist during worship, 
despite expanded freedom to conduct services. Large-scale testing 
is in progress at Site-82. 


Addendum 3442-A (Interview Log 251): 


[OPEN ADDENDUM] 


Prepared by the 
Administrative Department 


Interviewed: Jeff Bronston, Industries 
Accountant 


Interviewer: Agent Celena Athanas 


Foreword: Agent Athanas was undercover as a financial 
reporter at the time of the interview, investigating 
Industries' headquarters in Athens, Greece. Interview 
translated from Greek. 


Agent Athanas: I'm sorry for taking up any 
more of your time, Mr. Bronston. | just had a 
few more questions for you. 


J. Bronston: It's no problem at all. If anything, 
it's nice to have positive press for a change, 


especially when it's about how efficient we're 
poised to become. Under our old system | 
might not have time to talk to you at all! 


Agent Athanas: Of course. Now, during our 
last interview you mentioned that | should 
speak to your boss about the specifics of your 
new corporate structure. | believe you said 
management wasn't your field of expertise? 


J. Bronston: | remember saying something 
similar. 


Agent Athanas: Now, | tried to follow up with 
the woman you mentioned, and she sent me to 
someone in HR, who directed me to the head 
of HR, who had been fired the week before. A 
note on her door sent me to Facility 
Maintenance, who directed me to someone in 
Customer Service, who sent me back to 
another person in maintenance. Then | went 
through something like 20 people along your 
production chain. The one at the end of all that 
was helpful enough to direct me back to you. 


J. Bronston: You didn't have to go to all that 
trouble. If you would take a look at our new- 


Agent Athanas: Just tell me one thing. How 
long have you been your own boss? 


J. Bronston: About three months now. It really 
is very efficient, like | was saying before. No 
need to wait for replies to my emails, being 
able to approve my own projects, you get the 
idea. Now, my new boss over in Health and 
Safety is still a pain in my ass, but it's all in the 
service of... would you like some aspirin? 


Agent Athanas: No, no. | was just realizing 
how this all is put together. It's innovative, to 


say the least. 


J. Bronston: Something like this would 
usually be proprietary information, of course, 
but I'm sure no one here thinks it should be 
kept from the rest of the world. Frankly, I've 
been thinking lately that everything would run 
much more smoothly if we could just get the 
word out. Just imagine a government, or even 
a society, put together like our little company. 


Agent Athanas: I'm sure our readers will be 
thrilled to learn about it. Thank you again, Mr. 
Bronston. 


Note: Agent Athanas activated her panic button five 
hours later, shortly after submitting her incident report. 
The text of her report has been deemed a Class-3 
infohazard. Any incident follow-up should be directed to 
the newly-formed Site-82 Senior Operational 
Management Division-16-Samekh for processing. 


Footnotes 

1. Individuals, departments, component businesses, etc. 

2. An organization is considered infected once it has been organized 
according to SCP-3442. 

3. Small silver coins. All recovered coinage shows signs of extensive 


clipping. 


SCP-3443: Placeholder 


Item #: SCP-3443 
Object Class: N/A