To: moc.liamlamron| 
0202ylper.on#moc.liamlamron|0202ylper.on 
From: moc.liamlamron| 

9451 evitatneserper#moc.liamlamron| 
9451evitatneserper 


We have an important date of high traffic 
transportation upcoming that would require the 
use of another portal. The arrival of this 
information was sudden, and required 
immediate action for it to be prepared in time. 
We apologize for the inconvenience. 


Regards, 
Representative H. 


Subject: Re: Re: Whyyy 

To: moc.liamlamron| 
9451evitatneserper#moc.liamlamron| 
9451evitatneserper From: moc.liamlamron| 
0202ylper.on#moc.liamlamron|0202ylper.on 


Too sudden to shoot an email? 


With apprehensiveness, 
JaJa 


C: Appropriation of SCP-1549-A 


Operation "Aggressive Networking" directors and 
operatives prepared for a military takeover of SCP-1549- 
A and detaining of Pols following the first test of the 


Foundation Transportation Network Wormhole Device. 
MTF Lambda-5 ("White Rabbits") was deployed 
and successfully secured positions at all eleven portals 
and then proceeded to search SCP-1549-A for any Pols. 
After none were found, Modifed Lang-Scranton Spacial 
Stabilizers (offshoots of the Scranton Reality Anchor 
designed to disrupt Class-B "Information Superhighway" 
Wormholes®) were deployed. After three portals were 
successfully closed, all remaining Pol-1549 created 
portals became inactive. Investigation revealed that all 
domains originally containing SCP-1549 instances had 
become unavailable with the exception of 
"normalmail.com", which was found to become non- 
anomalous. The following email was received two 
minutes after this event: 


Subject: cool cool 

To: moc.liamlamron| 

9451 evitatneserper#moc.liamlamron| 

9451 evitatneserper From: moc.liamlamron| 
0202ylper.on#moc.liamlamron|0202ylper.on 


https: //www.youtube.com/watch? 
v=4XNr-BOgpd0 


Operation "Aggressive Networking" ran uninterrupted 
until the 17th of May, 2015, when Pol-1549 presumably 
created and deployed a means of generating hostile 
SCP-1549-B instances. Notable SCP-1549-B instances 
wore garb associated typically with Roman gladiatorial 
combat, and were equipped with swords, axes, and flails 
that glowed purple and were able to shoot large 
(approximately two meters long and five centimeters 
wide) cylindrical projectiles at speeds in excess of 750 
meters per second. Composition of projectiles was never 
able to be determined, due to their property of dissipating 
after ten seconds of existence. Initial barrages by 
SCP-1549-B instances halted Operation "Aggressive 
Networking" for a total of four days, resulting in the 


deaths of 3 personnel and the wounding of 28 others 
(SCP-1549-B instances appeared to aim for non-lethal 
body parts). 


MTF Lambda-5 located the spawning grounds of 
SCP-1549-B near the inactive "people-zoo.com" portal 
and filled the area with concrete, sustaining only 13 
minor and 2 major injuries. Over the course of the next 
three months, similar SCP-1549-B spawning grounds 
had been created and neutralized, stalling Operation 
"Aggressive Networking" three times before roadways 
between Foundation made portals were fortified and 
guarded. By the 27th of June, 2015, Operation 
"Aggressive Networking" had reclaimed and maintained 
its function. 


D: Final Interaction w/ Pol-1549 


The following email was received on the 4th of July, 
2015: 


Subject: Coming to a Close 

To: moc.liamlamron| 

9451 evitatneserper#moc.liamlamron| 
9451evitatneserper From: moc.liamlamron| 
0202ylper.on#moc.liamlamron|0202ylper.on 


Well, we've had a good run. | have attacked, 
you've attacked, it's all been fun and games 
and really, thank you for letting me say that | 
have fought and had moderate success 
against an international covert organization. 
This will be a fun story to tell for a long time. 
Yes, grandchildren, | did assist in making the 
transportation network for a shadowy 
government organization that secretly attempts 
to contain slash destroy magic stuff. And then 
they took it from me without giving me credit. 
How lame is that, Jimbo? | imagine that my 
grandson will be named Jimbo. 


Anyways, I'm over it. I'm over being angry. | 
can make new stuff, | just happened to make 
something easily found and exploited — two 
aspects you never want to mix. You never did 
take me up on that movie date. It's still open, 
by the way. I'd love to get to know you better. 
Really, | don't think you ever saw the place as 
anything more than a series of portals. Did you 
ever talk to my many Als? Did you ever see 
the awesome creatures that | had behind glass 
over in the aquarium? Did you ever see any of 
my friends’ short films? No? Yeah fuck you. 


You might not have noticed, but | spent 
months, fucking months making just the code 
work. Then | spent months making the interior 
all special and shit. And then | made the 
websites, introduced the places to my pals 
across the globe and we met in person for the 
first time ever. It was magical, you shits. 
Fucking magical. And what happens? Three 
days, man. Three days in and — ah man | 
wish | could say his real name and get you 
fuckers after him, but he'd know my name too 
and we'd drag each other down. But Ardan. 
Fucking Ardan Pearson and his permanent 
stick up his ass never let go of a grudge and 
here we are! Who would have found out had it 
not been for him? Who intentionally tries to 
walk into their computer screen? Lunatics, 
that's who. And nobody would believe them 
anyways. 


So you didn't stop to smell the roses. The 
year's worth of effort of roses, and you walked 
in here and took over in a year. Two years isn't 
a terrible run, but fuck you. Absolutely fuck 
you. Take a fingernail clipper and pull off your 
eyelids. Get smashed by a wrecking ball 
crane. Get a whole host of maggots teleported 


in between your cardio muscles and let it 
writhe in the pit of your heart. Get unfucked 
and die a virgin. And most importantly, have a 
nice day. 


| sincerely hope you have a big savings 
account. 


With love, 
JaJa 


When passing into SCP-1549-A, all portals were found to 
be surrounded by a large impenetrable wall made of 
green bricks, with a small bronze slot near their bottom. 
Next to the slots were signs reading: 


For access to Jamie's websites, all you have 
to do is make three easy payments of 
10E10109 USD. Please insert physical money 
into slot. Come again! 


Locating Pol-1549 has been upgraded to high priority 
(Code Orange). 


Footnotes 

1. Text documents will appear as papers or books, while things like 
audiovisual media can be represented as a number of objects 
including reels of film, vinyl recordings and nondescript VHS tapes. 
2. Except for one unoffensive mention of "normalmail.com" by user 
JaJa2020 on the Forums, asking if "anyone else used this 
weird website" to which only one user, named Normal_Pearson, 
responded with "no twat" [sic]. 

3. Link returned a 404 Error approximately 60 minutes after the 
email was sent. 

4. Development of extradimensional spaces able to connect to 
multiple places on Earth had so far been unfruitful and consequently 
abandoned. 

5. The nine active ones, and the two inactive portals created along 
with "jaja-artgallery.com" and "coolnormalgames.com". 

6. A proposed technological singularity that could act as a means of 
transfer of matter into informational constructs. 


« SCP-1548 | SCP-1549 | SCP-1550 » 


SCP-1550: Dr. Wondertainment's Custom-Pets™ 


Item #: SCP-1550 
Object Class: Safe 


Special Containment Procedures: All adult SCP-1550 specimens 
are to be contained in a sealed 5m by 5m by 5m terrarium 
simulating desert conditions under electronic surveillance and 
implanted with tracking devices. In event of an escape, the affected 
sector will be locked down until all soecimens have been recaptured. 
SCP-1550 eggs are to be kept in their airtight packaging apart from 
in testing. The total population of SCP-1550 adults are not to exceed 
twenty at a time, with further specimens being terminated and their 
corpses incinerated. All testing must be approved by Level 3 staff or 
higher. All uncontained instances of SCP-1550 discovered must 
immediately be killed on sight. 


Description: Item SCP-1550 is an apparently artificial species of 
unknown classification whose larvae have the ability to undergo 
metamorphoses into a form which is adapted for their environment. 
However, despite adaptations, all soecimens possesses a tattoo-like 
set of markings on their underbelly reading [DATA EXPUNGED] - a 
Dr. Wondertainment Trademark" and none will grow to over 
centimeters in length. Due to SCP-1550's powers of adaptation, it is 
unknown if the species has an original form, and if so what it is. 
SCP-1550 eggs are 1-centimeter-long flesh-toned ovoids, which will 
only hatch if exposed to air. When packaged, they are stored under 
airtight plastic seals apparently for transport. Dissection of 
unhatched eggs reveals them to simply contain a biological mucoid 
substance containing fragmentary DNA of unknown origin. As adult 
SCP-1550 specimens appear to be sterile it is unknown how the 
eggs are created. 


SCP-1550 » Experiment Log 
+ Experiment Log for SCP-1550 


Date: / / 
Test Subject: SCP-1550 


Procedure: One (1) SCP-1550 egg was placed in a tank 
of seawater and allowed to hatch. 


Results: SCP-1550 specimen SCP-1550-1 has gills 
along its upper back behind the eyes, and flattened and 
broadened tails to serve as paddles for swimming, and 
produces specialized mucus to protect its eyes from salt 
damage. It has a swim bladder revealed upon dissection 
in its lower and [DATA EXPUNGED]. 


Notes: Skin coloration was also a mottled blue, 
presumably to blend in with seawater. Dr. 


Date: / / 
Test Subject: SCP-1550 


Procedure: One (1) SCP-1550 egg was placed in a tank 
of water taken from a river behind Site in which 
SCP-1550 was stored and allowed to hatch. 


Results: SCP-1550 specimen SCP-1550-2 possess 
enlarged lungs and thinned body for increased 
streamlining. 


Notes: No gills? Apparently it doesn't use the same 
adaptations for similar circumstances. That's somewhat 
odd. Dr. 


Date: / / 
Test Subject: SCP-1550 


Procedure: One (1) SCP-1550 egg was placed ina 
terrarium made to simulate a temperate forest 
ecosystem and allowed to hatch. 


Results: SCP-1550 specimen SCP-1550-3 has a thin 
layer of brown fur covering the top of its body and a 
ridged, snakelike underbelly as well as enlarged tail- 
tentacles. 


Notes: The ridges along SCP-1550-3's underbelly had a 
small oval patch of smooth skin on which the tattoo-like 
markings where located. Dr. 


Date: / / 
Test Subject: SCP-1550 


Procedure: One (1) SCP-1550 egg was placed ina 
terrarium made to simulate a desert ecosystem and 
allowed to hatch. 


Results: SCP-1550-4 was cold-blooded and has a 
tanned coloration to camouflage it against sand, as well 
as a tendency to burrow. 


Notes: The size was also interesting. centimeters in 
length, about one centimeter larger than the other 
specimens. Dr. 


Date: / / 
Test Subject: SCP-1550 


Procedure: One (1) SCP-1550 egg was placed ina 
terrarium made to simulate a standard city apartment 
and allowed to hatch. 


Results: SCP-1550-5 has leathery skin, eyes on short 
lumps protruding from its head in a manner somewhat 
like the eyes of a chameleon, and was noted for 
behaving in a more affectionate and active manner to 
researchers than other specimens of SCP-1550. 


Notes: Study revealed that behind the jaw inside are 
located strands of whale-like baleen, allowing the 
specimen to filter dust and crumbs from the floor. Dr. 


Date: / / 
Test Subject: SCP-1550 


Procedure: One (1) SCP-1550 egg was placed in a vat 
of molten iron. 


Results: SCP-1550-6 egg burst into flame and was 
destroyed. 


Notes: Well, what did you expect to happen? Dr. 


Date: / / 
Test Subject: SCP-1550 


Procedure: One (1) SCP-1550 egg was placed ina 
vacuum chamber which was then depressurized. 


Results: SCP-1550-7 egg exploded coating the inside of 
the vacuum chamber in [DATA EXPUNGED] 


Notes: /t now seems obvious that SCP-1550 eggs 
cannot survive conditions besides those in which at least 
some sort of complex animal can live. So we might as 
well stop trying to make them do so. Dr. 


Date: / / 
Test Subject: SCP-1550 


Procedure: One (1) SCP-1550 egg was placed ina 
vacuum chamber filled with seawater which was then 
pressurized to 1,086 bars (15,750 psi) 

Results: SCP-1550-8 possessed a bioluminescent lure 
similar to that of an anglerfish extending from its 
forehead, gills similar to SCP-1550-1, and a dark grey- 
blue coloration. Legs were flattened and webbed into 
fishlike fins and eyes were nearly twice the size of those 
of other SCP-1550 specimens. Teeth were sharpened 
and possessed ridges to cut meat, similar to those found 
in many species of shark. 


Notes: This leaves the question of just what kind of child 
Dr. Wondertainment is trying to sell these things to that 
would live in conditions where a creature like that could 
be kept as a pet. Dr. 


History 


SCP-1550 was brought into containment after a series of ten (10) 


cardboard packages printed with stylized images of SCP-1550 
specimens and the words "Dr. Wondertainment's Custom-Pets™!" 
each containing six (6) SCP-1550 eggs in separate airtight 
compartments and a short instruction leaflet were found in the exotic 
pets section of the pet store. Upon interrogation of store 
workers it was proven that none possessed knowledge of 
SCP-1550. 


Instruction leaflet for SCP-1550: 
Enclosed with original packaging. 


Hey Kids! Your parents aren't letting you get a dog or 
cat? Don't fret, buy a Dr. Wondertainment Custom-Pet™! 


Dr. Wondertainment's Custom-Pets™ are far superior to 
an ordinary and boring cat or dog due to their original 
Adapto-Eggs™ packaging, a Dr. Wondertainment 
invention! Just leave your Custom-Pet™ Adapto-Eggs™ 
around the house and when they hatch they'll fit right in. 
Perfect for apartments! 


To get your very own Custom-Pets™ is easy kids! Just 
put an egg in your house and break the plastic seal to 
give your new pet some air so it can hatch. Your new pet 
will be perfect for where you live, wherever you live! If 
your new Custom-Pet™ seems lonely just add another 
Adapto-Egg™ and get him a new friend! 


Warning for parents: please monitor your children's 
placement of Adapto-Eggs™ to prevent . Dr. 
Wondertainment is not responsible for injuries or death 
caused by this or any other product. 


Wondertainment Custom-Pets™ are shipped pre- 
neutered! 


« SCP-1549 | SCP-1550 | SCP-1551 » 


SCP-1551: Repeating House 


Item #: SCP-1551 
Object Class: Euclid 


Special Containment Procedures: Two agents are to integrate 
themselves in the town of , Argentina, under civilian guise. 
Integrating agents are to move into 12 Street, a purchased 
house, in order to maintain constant surveillance of SCP-1551. Any 
civilian coming within 30 meters of SCP-1551 are to be questioned 
and, if not found to be an instance of SCP-1551-X, given a Class-C 
amnestic and released. New instances of SCP-1551-X are to be 
interviewed for confirmation of having gone through the events 
associated with SCP-1551 before being allowed into SCP-1551. At 
this time, precautions against a resident of SCP-1551 leaving the 
containment area are not necessary.