### Human: And then you lay the plan to put in a lot of place to keep safe with the nightlight, turning it on, having the door closed, yep?### Assistant: Yeah, make sure windows shut, that sort of thing. Curtains closed. There's no one at the window, if there was. Keeping doors around me shut so there's no way getting in around me. Yeah, that sort of thing.


### Human: And how would you like your sleep to look? How would you like things to look like?### Assistant: Just sit down to bed and go straight away.


### Human: Strange question, yeah.### Assistant: Yeah, so just for me to hop in bed and go to sleep straight away. That's something.


### Human: Yep. And that's been happening the last week. Is that what'd you say?### Assistant: It's been happening the last few days.


### Human: Last few days, yep.### Assistant: Yeah, because I've been so tired.


### Human: But then, when you're not as tired, which you said if you don't play as much sport, then it's not?### Assistant: Yeah. If I'm not physically tired, it's a lot harder to fall asleep because I'm still awake-ish.


### Human: And have you thought-- we have it down here, if you hear a sound, you say to yourself, "It's nothing." Has that helped, or have you tried that, or not really?### Assistant: Part of me, I sort of try to get up and see what it is, but certainly it's kind of the door, that sort of thing.


### Human: Does that help?### Assistant: And trying to do that sort of does, but it's whether or not I can get myself to do it and get out of bed to do it because normally I freeze in bed and I sort of go, "It's nothing. Go away." And I've been trying to get up to make sure that I know that, "Yes, there's no one there, there's nothing happening," that sort of thing, so.


### Human: So you're kind of double checking.### Assistant: Yeah.


### Human: Is that helpful doing that?### Assistant: Hasn't happened-- I sort of can't get the courage to get out of bed to look at it. I have a few times, just gone to the door, peeked through, opened it a bit and looked through, and then ran straight back into bed, but nothing-- it hasn't really helped at all.


### Human: Does that make you feel more stressed?### Assistant: Sort of the fact that yeah, sort of know that they're not there around me, but it's whether I can even work up the courage to even go to the door and even walk out to even check, yeah.


### Human: And do you feel that would be helpful if you were doing that every night? Would that make sleep harder, do you think?### Assistant: Oh, that can make sleep a bit easier because I know that no one's there. Sort of trick myself into that, "There's no one there, so there's really no need to bother," that sort of thing.


### Human: Tricking yourself?### Assistant: Yeah, I guess.


### Human: What's another word we can use?### Assistant: I don't know.


### Human: I don't think you're tricking yourself.### Assistant: I'm really not, I'm just making sure that no one's there.


### Human: Yeah. So you're kind of challenging the way you're thinking?### Assistant: Yeah.


### Human: Yeah. Doesn't sound like you're trying to trick you brain, it sounds like you're trying to tell your brain it's okay. Is that something you think you could try, or is there something else we can think of?### Assistant: No, I'd just give it a shot.


### Human: Yeah?### Assistant: Yeah. Like I said, I've tried to do it a few times, but it's been with the courage to get out of bed.


### Human: So what would stop you from getting out of bed?### Assistant: The noises or the fact that someone could be, so there's no need to get out of bed, just stay in bed.


### Human: So you're safer if you're in bed?### Assistant: Yeah.


### Human: Yep. So does that really mean you would get up and check then?### Assistant: Yes. Sort of like the fact that there's no need to get out of bed because you hear a noise, you're all right, but if you stay in bed, it might go away or nothing will happen, that sort of thing.


### Human: So would you rather stay in bed or get up? And what I'm doing here is problem solving with you to go--### Assistant: Getting up would help for me to go, "Yeah, there's no one there, so there's no need to worry," and that sort of thing.


### Human: Yep. So is that something you think you could try for maybe a few days and see if that changes?### Assistant: Yeah.


### Human: Yeah? How many days do you think you could try it, say from today and the next time I see you?### Assistant: I guess try as much as I can.


### Human: Yep. How often is that?### Assistant: I don't know.


### Human: If you make the goal more specific, it's more achievable. And really stick.### Assistant: I don't know, two to three times.


### Human: Two to three times, yep. Any particular day do you think could be more realistic?### Assistant: Try at least every day maybe.


### Human: Yep. You said two, three--### Assistant: Two or three days.


### Human: Yep. So you're going to try two to three times. At a particular day you will try? Or is more likely one day than another? It's lot to think about, isn't it?### Assistant: Yeah. I don't know, actually.


### Human: Or is it we try you being in bed and being able to calm yourself, that's next steps, or? Totally your choice. How about if you're more comfortable going to sleep, and then when, if you wake up, you feel more comfortable going back to sleep.### Assistant: I don't know. I don't know specific day. I have no idea.


### Human: Is it days that you play-- are you playing footie at the moment? So you've got your ankle--### Assistant: I didn't play last Sunday, but I will be all right Wednesday.


### Human: For tomorrow? Yep.### Assistant: And hopefully Sunday.


### Human: Yep. So the infection's all good?### Assistant: Yeah.


### Human: That's good to hear.### Assistant: A bit painful around the sore, it's cold and I can run in football boots, that sort of thing.


### Human: Yeah. And do you have a plaster or something over?### Assistant: No, it's just a Band-Aid over it.


### Human: Yep. So what could help with sleep? Doing something that's not too hard, but you can challenge yourself a little bit to see if that could change sleep?### Assistant: Just going out to check that. That's the only thing I could think of.


### Human: But you also say that--### Assistant: If I hear a sound.


### Human: You're also saying that could be really hard to do, to build up the courage to double check. It's not easy to do a plan.### Assistant: No, it's not.


### Human: I can see you're deep in thought going, "What will work?" Because you've said you've been trying and you do it most nights to say, "It's nothing," but that doesn't really calm you, does it?### Assistant: Yeah. It doesn't.


### Human: Anything else you could either say to yourself or do, do you think?### Assistant: Just turn my back to the door and try to fall asleep again.


### Human: Have you tried that before?### Assistant: No. I always try to think of things.


### Human: Yeah. Let's write all the things you've thought of down. So there was turn back to door, get up and check, courage to do, maybe-- any other ideas?### Assistant: Not really.


### Human: You can try, I'm wondering. If we write these 1 to 10 of how difficult it is to do, how hard is it to say to yourself, "It's nothing." From 1 to 10?### Assistant: Not really hard.


### Human: Pardon? Not hard. So how would you write it with 10 being really easy, 1 being really, really hard.### Assistant: 10.


### Human: 10, yep. That's 10 out of 10.### Assistant: Just basically just saying, "It's nothing. Don't worry about. Just go back to sleep."


### Human: "Don't worry about it. Go back to sleep." And turning your back to the door, getting up and check, what's easier to do?### Assistant: Turning my back to the door.


### Human: Out of 10, how hard is it? Or how easy is it to do?### Assistant: 10.


### Human: 10, yep. 10 out of 10. So that's the easiest, and then that. And if you turn your back to the door and you're still feeling stressed, what could you do?### Assistant: I guess go out and check.


### Human: Yep. How hard is that out of 10.### Assistant: About 4 or 5.


### Human: 4 or 5, yeah. 4 or 5 out of 10. Could that be an idea, you start with saying it to yourself, turning your back, and then seeing how you go with getting up?### Assistant: Yep.


### Human: And we can wait to see how hard it was to do? Does that really stick?### Assistant: Yeah.


### Human: Anything else you'd want to add or change, or you go, "No, that's not going to work."### Assistant: Nothing.


### Human: So we can do like a bit of an experiment to see which of these work, and if something helps more than another, we can add a few things. We've kind of created the easiest thing to do and then the hardest because you say you do that already and it's really easy to do, but you can still get caught up with, "Is someone in the house?"### Assistant: Yep. It's nothing that I'd change.


### Human: Is that helpful, doing that?### Assistant: Yeah.


### Human: Writing it down. Do you want me to re-write it so you've got a copy, or you think you've got it?### Assistant: I think I'll be all right.


### Human: Yep. So what are the three things you'll do?### Assistant: Say to myself, "It's nothing. Don't worry. Just go back to sleep," try to get back to sleep. If not, turn my back, and if still not, see if I can get up to check.


### Human: Yeah. And we can check in and see how often you did the three and what was helpful, what wasn't, and replan it next time. How's that sound?### Assistant: Good.


### Human: Good? Have you been using this before? Do we need to redo this, or is it about the same, or is there anything?### Assistant: I don't think we will redo it until the half and half comes in.


### Human: Yep. It's staying the same for now.### Assistant: Yeah.


### Human: And footie's still the same days?### Assistant: Yep.


### Human: Yep. I was wondering if it had changed.### Assistant: It's coming up to the end of football though, but.


### Human: And do you play another sport in summer?### Assistant: No.


### Human: Why did I think you played cricket in summer?### Assistant: I don't know.


### Human: I just decided that you do.### Assistant: No, I don't play cricket at all. I just play football.


### Human: I don't think you've ever told me that you, but some reason, I thought you played cricket. I don't know why.  Maybe it's just my association, football's in winter and cricket's in summer. It doesn't mean that you'd be playing it.### Assistant: No, I only do football. There's not really a different sport that I do.


### Human: Did you do some hockey at school. In your last term maybe?### Assistant: No. I did that in the summer.


### Human: But not really a thing you do?### Assistant: No, that's only for school. Something just for school.


### Human: Yep, that's what you were saying. Maybe I've got hockey and cricket confused and they're very different sports. And how have putting in the homework-- because you were saying that was tricky and I know you've been on holidays for a while.### Assistant: Yeah. I really haven't had any homework for the past few days.


### Human: You wouldn't have, you've been on holidays, yeah.### Assistant: But when I get back to school, I got to start getting back into the swing of things, yeah.


### Human: And where we had it, does that look like it'd be the same, or is it more-- you're just going to wait and see?### Assistant: I don't know what it looks like. This looks like what I do, yeah.


### Human: Well, we can have a relook at that next time. Does that sound good? And do a bit of the plan with sleep?### Assistant: Mm-hmm.


### Human: Anything else you wanted to chat about today?### Assistant: Not really.


### Human: I think we've covered it pretty well. And have you got a session with Mum coming up with this? Mum spoke with you about that? Whilst you stare at me blankly.### Assistant: No, I don't-- no idea about that.


### Human: Okay. So Mum had booked in a family session for you and me with her in a few weeks.### Assistant: I hope not.


### Human: Mum hasn't spoken to you about that yet?### Assistant: No.


### Human: What are your thoughts around--### Assistant: I don't really know. I don't really know much about-- it might be good, it might not, I'm not 100% sure.


### Human: From my understanding, when I chatted to Mum, a space for all of you to be able to talk to each other so you can communicate better because like you were just saying that Mum gets angry and doesn't talk to you.### Assistant: Yeah, but I guess the sort of thing is, no matter who she's around or what we deal with, she's still not going to-- that's just her-- she doesn't take that sort of stuff. And I kind of did something with dad with Mum and he felt the fact that Mum was still getting angry and stuff, but not showing it around. Yeah, I guess give it a go, but don't really know what's going to happen, but yeah.


### Human: Like you're saying, it's good to give it a go because something could change, and good for you to bring up, "Hey, this is how I felt it was in--"### Assistant: She might choke on that, that's just what he told me because he did it with her, so.


### Human: And remember we were chatting, see how you go with that, but I'm happy to have a session with you and Mum in the future, if you'd like that. We've spoken about that and we plan that together.### Assistant: Yeah.


### Human: Totally your choice. But we planned it so that Mum didn't feel-- hopefully wouldn't feel that she's feeling blamed and we're trying to work it through together. How you feeling?### Assistant: Good.


### Human: Good. Good. Because I saw your face like, "What is she talking about."### Assistant: I have no idea about that, no.


### Human: Maybe Mum had left until it's closer to the date to have a chat about it.### Assistant: I wish she might not have told us and just brought us anyways, yeah.


### Human: Has that happened before?### Assistant: Yeah, she has done that before, yeah, so.


### Human: Well, I've definitely given you a heads up because Mum had said she would be chatting to you to check that's something you're interested in, and you can definitely bring it up with Mum and go, "Hey, I was following up that you were still having that session."### Assistant: Yes. Yes, she has done that a few times where she doesn't tell us and then just brought us, so. Could be anything.


### Human: That was definitely happening. It definitely would have been discussed with Mum, is the plan, and probably she would've been aware.### Assistant: I don't think he is either.


### Human: he's not either?### Assistant: I doubt it.


### Human: Definitely let Mum know because she did tell me that she was going to have a chat to you about it.### Assistant: When is it?


### Human: yes, because I wrote it down because I was going to check when you'd like our next session to be, on a Tuesday or before we have that appointment, the family appointment, to see what you were feeling would be a better option for yourself.### Assistant: Before that, would be easier.


### Human: Yeah?### Assistant: Just in case for some reason I'm not up to it or-- yeah. Before that.


### Human: Yeah. And we can definitely chat it through together if you like of what you'd like to say in the session. Would that be helpful?### Assistant: Yeah.


### Human: Yeah? So you can have a think about. So 3:30 would work right before, or would rather 3:00 to 4:00 and then have a half an hour break before the family session?### Assistant: When's this?


### Human: This is in two weeks, on a Thursday.### Assistant: On a Thursday. Maybe do Tuesday or someday a week before we do it.


### Human: Yep. So a week before would be next week. Or we can do the same week, if you like. Your choice.### Assistant: The same week, but a few days before maybe.


### Human: Yeah. So if we did the Tuesday, so I've written that down thinking you might want a different day, if we did 12:00 o'clock, would that be all right?### Assistant: Should be.


### Human: Yep.### Assistant: Should be all right. If not, Mum will change it.


### Human: Yeah. I can write it down and Mum can call to change it.### Assistant: Yeah.


### Human: And you can let Mum know that I was following up that you were aware of the family session and you can have a chat with her about it. We've definitively got. Was a late booking, so maybe Mum hasn't had a chance yet to have a chat with both of you because you've been at Dad's place. But you definitely have a heads up now, so it's not a surprise. And we definitely book things in together, so if you're not told that you're coming, it's your choice if you want to come. And that's really i### Assistant:


### Human: It sounds like she's got good intentions, but that communication's probably a good reason for why it'll be good to see her. Like you've just said, "I'm open to it, but I'd like to know so I can get ready for it too."### Assistant: Yeah. Normally if something came up, she'd text straight away about it, but. When was it booked?


### Human: I'm not sure because that was me who booked it in and that was from mum and Mum had said for both of you. When I spoke over the phone, she said she was going to check that both of you were open to the idea. So it sounds like--### Assistant: I guess you and I will have a chat about it.


### Human: Yeah. Maybe there's just been some miscommunication and Mum hasn't had that chat to both of you yet, and I'm a step ahead of myself when I've had that chat with you.### Assistant: Yeah, I'll speak with him about it to see what we do, if he wants to, and if he does, we'll do it, if he doesn't, and we'll chat to Mum about it.


### Human: Yeah. And what are your thoughts about having that?### Assistant: To be honest, I wouldn't be 100% sure.


### Human: What would you like to get out of a session with both of you and Mum?### Assistant: No idea, to be honest. I guess I feel uncomfortable speaking about sort of stuff with Mum, so I have no idea of what'd I do, that sort of thing, so. Yeah, I have no idea.


### Human: Would that help to focus on that next time together, and we can write down some dot points together?### Assistant: Yeah, I guess.


### Human: Yeah? Totally your choice.### Assistant: Yeah. I'll think about it when I have the appointment, I guess.


### Human: You can think over it the next week and then see what could be helpful and we can brainstorm it so you're feeling comfortable. And mum's really experienced with working with the family and letting everyone have their voice in what's going on. So I'm hearing you'd like things to be a bit different with Mum, but you're not sure if change is possible. Is that my understanding?### Assistant: Just whether or not I want to talk about sort of what I've gone through.


### Human: What's stopping you from talking about it, you think?### Assistant: Mum.


### Human: Mum? What about it?### Assistant: How she takes things when you say it. She doesn't exactly take things well. She gets very angry sometimes. Just in her eyes, she doesn't believe she's doing anything wrong. That's just her. She doesn't believe she's doing anything wrong most of the time.


### Human: Yeah. So how do you think you could have that conversation now knowing that there's this potential appointment with Mum?### Assistant: I don't know. I guess I'd wait until Mum spoke about it to speak about it with her. I'd speak to her before.


### Human: Yeah. I hear both of you work as a united front together with talking things through?### Assistant: Yeah.


### Human: Because things potentially won't change if you don't do some other work, potentially, so that could be good to have that space, and maybe it is the first session, you don't feel too comfortable to say too much and hear what Mum has to say, but it could also be a good place to go, "Hey, Mum, I do feel you take things personally, but this is how I'm feeling," so you can have that skill of being able to be confident, and it's at a place where someone can mediate that conversation too.### Assistant: Yeah. And I guess I'll think about it over the next week.


### Human: Yeah. That sounds like a good plan. That's totally your choice. It could be a good option for you to have the space with Mum. And we can definitely talk about it too, but we will talk about unless you're feeling, "No, I don't really want to." It sounds like it can be a bit tricky with Mum, and the best way to be able to talk about it is to have her in the room so you can talk it through, which can be pretty scar in itself.### Assistant: Yeah.


### Human: What are you thinking?### Assistant: I don't know. I'll think about it over the next week and see what I want to do about it and speak to you about it.


### Human: Sounds like a good plan because we definitely want everyone to feel like it's their choice around it, and I'm hearing it might be something Mum just hasn't gotten around to having a chat about that week, because she definitely said she wanted to check with you boys to check that you both came, like , for young men. And we can check you on this stuff and see where you're feeling with it. Sound good?### Assistant: Yep.


### Human: I'll turn this off.### Assistant: Two session seven, RV, first of the eighth. .. How have you been since-- it was two weeks ago?


### Human: Two session seven, RV, first of the eighth. .. How have you been since-- it was two weeks ago?### Assistant: Yeah. Yeah. Pretty well.


### Human: How's school?### Assistant: Yeah. Good.


### Human: Good. And new friends because you said last time there was some new people you were hanging out with. How are they?### Assistant: Good.


### Human: Good. Same old. Yeah. What would you like to focus on today?### Assistant: I'm not really sure to be honest.


### Human: Totally all good. We'd spoken about sleep in the family session last time. Did you want to focus on either of them first?### Assistant: Don't really know.


### Human: Your choice. Or something--### Assistant: min.


### Human: --else. That's fine too.### Assistant: I have no idea whatsoever.


### Human: Whatsoever. Did you want to start with sleep because I know I've got that here? Do you remember what we'd spoken about last time? How is your memory?### Assistant: Not exactly.


### Human: What was our plan around if you heard a noise at night? Do you remember that? There were three things you were going to do.### Assistant: Oh, that's right.


### Human: I know it's in the back of the brain there. In a memory there.### Assistant: I decided to myself that it was nothing, and if I still wasn't 100% sure, see if I can find the courage to get up. And if I--


### Human: And there was one in between the two.### Assistant: The first one was turning over.


### Human: Yes. Good memory. How did you go with them? How has sleep been?### Assistant: I haven't really done it as much because I'm starting to fall asleep now a lot earlier.


### Human: So tell me about that. What time are you going to sleep? Because last time you were adjusting to the time zone, so you were saying sleep was pretty easy.### Assistant: At the moment I start falling to bed at around about 10:30.


### Human: And falling asleep at 10:30. That's amazing. That's a huge difference from-- I think when I first, first met you it was like 3:00 AM you couldn't fall asleep till. What do you think's changed?### Assistant: I don't know to be honest. I really have no idea. It might have been the weeks away because I don't even really know what caused me to have all of the-- yeah. To have all of these problems with sleeping. So I don't really know what happened. I found that I've been a lot more tired. Falling asleep around about 10:30ish now for the past three weeks.


### Human: Past three weeks.### Assistant: What?


### Human: Any--### Assistant: Sorry. Past week and a half or something like that.


### Human: 1.5, yeah, weeks. And has it been that you're hearing things or seeing the shadow? Because last time you were talking about the nightlight, and you can turn that off.### Assistant: Yeah. I haven't really been seeing a lot of things in my room, and I haven't really been hearing things either.


### Human: And what do you think that's about?### Assistant: I don't really know. So I've been normally going to bed at around about-- well, going into my room around about 10 o'clock, and I haven't.


### Human: Around 10:00 PM. Yeah.### Assistant: Yeah. And I have found out really, you should fall asleep. I haven't heard any noises, seen anything. Yeah. I'm not 100% sure why.


### Human: Are you feeling--### Assistant: Maybe because I've got a clear head. I don't know.


### Human: Yeah. And what is it about that you feel you've got a clear head?### Assistant: I don't know. It just feels like--


### Human: That's a good thing. I'm just--### Assistant: --there's nothing on my mind. Yeah.


### Human: Nothing on my mind. Yeah. That's what I'm hearing. Okay. I'll draw another piece of paper, such is my scribbles. So when you're increased feeling, stressed, or things on your mind, yeah? On your mind. Then that increases noises. Is that a-- I hear a yeah. Yeah?### Assistant: hours. The past week and a half, nothing's been really on my mind. So I can sleep. Wake up the next day. Go back to school. I've been enjoying school a lot more.


### Human: That's a huge difference because even two months ago you were like, "I'm not really enjoying it." What's made school--### Assistant: I think the fact that I'm now-- next year I'm doing it.


### Human: Wow. What's made that decision ?--### Assistant: I guess the fact that I--


### Human: --for next year?### Assistant: --don't like the whole idea of going to university or just doing-- I sort of learn a lot more practically. So if you put something in front of me, and it was a drawing or something like that, I'd more likely be able to understand that. If you just wrote it on the board or something like that. And I've sort of picked things up by watching people do them or doing it myself.


### Human: Yeah. So you're a more hands-on kind of person.### Assistant: And Mom said I've always been like that, and it's only recently that my math-- I'm enjoying my math because it's a more hands-on, more practical side of things. And now with this, I'm not just sitting in a classroom all the time. I'm actually getting outside, doing trade school on one day of the week.


### Human: Is that next year, or is this--### Assistant: This is next year.


### Human: Next year. So just checking because you haven't done anything, you being in the usual school. Does your school do the same? You're going to look at me blankly and go what--### Assistant: I think they do. I think they do because there's a few kids that are doing well this year.


### Human: Yeah. And so what trade will you do, or you're thinking?### Assistant: I'm doing certificate two in plumbing, pre-apprenticeship.


### Human: Certificate two plumbing. I'm writing it down so that I can memorize it because my way of remembering things is I write it down, it goes more in my brain. That's why you'll see me write a bit because it helps me remember. What's the choice of plumbing?### Assistant: Well, I did go through-- well, I didn't go through-- I went through a very long time of-- my mom's always been a nurse, and my dad was a nurse. And when we were born, he decided to change because they needed flexible time, so. Because Mom and Dad were both waking up extremely early.


### Human: So they were doing shift work.### Assistant: And Mom was doing nights. So Dad went out and did his-- his job was just building at this stage. When we were born, Mom would stay home with us when we were newborn, and then Dad would come home, Mom would go off and work nights at the local Hospital. So we've grown up with Mom being a nurse and Dad always being a builder. A carpenter. So dad and I were both very set on becoming carpenters or builders. Anything to do with wood because that's what we've grown up around. We've grow


### Human: And why plumbing or the sparkie or carpentry? What is it that--### Assistant: I don't know. I found it just that bit more interesting, and obviously, I wanted to sit and look at something different. Obviously, it goes plumbing, carpentry, sparkie on that side of things.


### Human: Yeah. Because I'm hearing bricklayer wouldn't be for you because it would be quite routine. Doing the same thing, yeah?### Assistant: So it sort of-- and so yeah, Dad told me to go out, look at some different things, that sort of thing, and I sort of looked at plumbing, and I saw it is sort of interesting. "Oh, what's that about?" And I was speaking to one of the people that-- because our school had some people come out and talk to us about some jobs, and sort of spoke to me about it, and sort of I found it interesting, and all the stuff you can do. In fact you can do gutters, sewage, fire sprinklers, normal household plum


### Human: And this is certificate three. Is that--### Assistant: So--


### Human: --the one you're doing next year, is that right, or is it the one--### Assistant: Next year it'll be certificate two.


### Human: Certificate two. Yeah. I did write two there, see? I wrote it down and didn't go into the memory.### Assistant: Yeah. So I'll be doing certificate two pre-apprenticeship--


### Human: Pre-apprenticeship. Yeah.### Assistant: --next year, and I'm pretty sure-- yeah. Sorry. Next year's year 11.


### Human: Next year's year 11. You have got it right.### Assistant: Year 12 I think we do two again.


### Human: Finish it off or so. Is it over two years?### Assistant: I think it's a two-year course. And then I can go off to london to get a certificate three.


### Human: Which is? Which is it? - that does it here, or is it--### Assistant: There's Melbourne Polytechnic. So they have one in Preston, Bundoora.


### Human: There's another one somewhere. Yeah.### Assistant: Somewhere else. And you can go off and get a certificate three, and that's what most employers expect. So--


### Human: That's the standard. Yeah.### Assistant: Yeah. That's the standard. So if someone was certificate two, and you're certificate three, you'd get looked at over them because they see you have more experience. So yeah, I think it's two-year. So I'd do the certificate two in plumbing over the two years until I finish year 12, and then I can go off, and I can do step three, step four, step five, and that's it.


### Human: Five or is to six, you said? You said five.### Assistant: I think it only goes up to-- I think it's five. Yeah.


### Human: Five. I think it's five years. Good job with the math.### Assistant: Yeah. So it goes all the way up to certificate five. So I can do certificate-- I think there's only four-month courses, and extremely--


### Human: Oh, so it's not very long. Yeah.### Assistant: --quick compared to other jobs. I was so like, "Oh, I don't want to sit in--" because my cousin's doing nursing, and she's-- doesn't go in a lot, and it's mostly online, but she's doing it-- I think it's a two-year course. And my cousin did ag science, and he did--


### Human: Agriculture science. Yeah.### Assistant: --three years. And I also had four kids that have gone into university. So four cousins that have gone into university.


### Human: Yeah. I'm like, "Four kids. Yeah."### Assistant: So one's doing forensic science, and she's only just gone to uni. And also one that's done stuff to do with genes and--


### Human: Genetics.### Assistant: Genetics. Yeah.


### Human: Something under biology class.### Assistant: It's something under that sort of-- I'm not 100% sure. And she's done a couple of years. I think she did two, and she has to still go back and do more because she found out that she didn't do enough subjects. So she had to go back and do summer school this year to finish off, and then she can look at getting a job. So I was sort of like, "I don't want to sit there for two, three years doing that sort of stuff." So when I found out they're only four-month courses, if I was to get all the way


### Human: And I can see you're really excited about this. Yeah.### Assistant: Yeah. I could even do-- so I can even go up to certificate four and do another month, and then have two, three years and go, or have a year and then go, "You know what? I want to go off and do all the way up to certificate five," and then that's another eight months. So they're not long.


### Human: And it sounds like for you, that's what you're after. Something not too long.### Assistant: Yeah. Something that's not too long because I hate being in a classroom, and I've always been outdoors.


### Human: And the--### Assistant: With sport, that sort of thing. So--


### Human: And is footie, as we have it written down here, is that where it is now, or has that changed now? ..### Assistant: Coming into finals, Wednesdays and Fridays and Sundays will all be free. So from--


### Human: Wednesdays and Fridays. Yeah. That's a big change.### Assistant: Yeah. So Sundays will be all-- yeah. So Sundays will be free. Friday after school will be free. And Wednesday after school will be free. So basically, I go from doing heaps of stuff to doing nothing.


### Human: Yeah. So what's that going to be like?### Assistant: And then Tuesday's coming for Calder Cannons, I'm pretty sure.


### Human: So we can talk.### Assistant: If I get invited back to Calder Cannons, I can do the--


### Human: Is that likely, that you'd get invited back?### Assistant: Depends how I went. Because we did little practice matches against the Knights and all that sort of stuff. So other things, like the Calder Cannons. So we went off and did matches against them, just here in the city. And so it'll either be the fact that if I did well enough, I'll be invited back, and if I didn't, obviously, I'll just continue at college level football. And then stick around to next year, and then--


### Human: And you're okay with either if it happens.### Assistant: I guess if they are cutting you, it's for a reason. It's not the fact that, "Oh, we're cutting you--" they're just going to cut you. oh, and that gives you something to improve on. So if they go, "Oh, your fitness wasn't up to scratch," or, "Your kicking wasn't up to scratch," I can spend from the end of footie season all the way up to next year's footie season trying to get them on track. So that means that if I'm going out and kicking the football more often, or I'm going out and


### Human: You're getting such a nice way of, "So how can I improve if they haven't chosen me?"### Assistant: So it's not the fact that they're just going to get kicked out. "You're kicked out now. See you. We won't have you back. You may never come back." But if you try hard enough and you have the motivation to do it, you're most likely to come back.


### Human: And I'm hearing you definitely have that motivation, and a really nice, "Okay. They didn't choose me for this reason, but if I improve, they could choose me." Such a nice way to think about it.### Assistant: Yeah. So it just all depends. It'll come down to, obviously, how I went in the normal football season. They'll look at how I went in there.


### Human: Yeah. And how is your-- you had an infection. Have you been able to play, or how is that all going?### Assistant: That's technically fine because it's healed up.


### Human: Because you said Mom got some tests and stuff done.### Assistant: Yeah. Well, it's perfectly fine now, but it was--


### Human: n. Oh.### Assistant: But yeah, it's perfectly fine now.


### Human: You can see that the skin's-- yeah.### Assistant: Yeah. That's where it was, right under the ankle, and that's all the skin that's all dried off.


### Human: It'll slowly grow back.### Assistant: Yeah. I'll always have a flat ankle now. I'll always have a bit of skin missing on the end of my ankle, so it won't be fully-- but yeah, it's healed and it's okay to touch.


### Human: That's good because nothing worse than you do that and it really hurts.### Assistant: Oh, but at that stage I couldn't-- this ankle here, that amount of pressure then was absolutely killing because it would spread out over my ankle like that.


### Human: It'd be very painful.### Assistant: And I couldn't walk for-- I found it hard to walk because I would be walking with my foot like that so the pressure was off the leg. It was all--


### Human: Not your usual way of walking.### Assistant: Yeah. So I'd be walking like-- I'd be walking with-- instead of walking like that like you normally do, I'd walk sort of--


### Human: m. Yeah.### Assistant: Invert my foot in so the pressure wasn't exactly on the inside of my shoe. So it was extremely hard with running as well. Now I can run perfectly fine in boots and that sort of stuff. So I guess, yeah, it's gotten a lot better from what it was.


### Human: Even in the two weeks we're seeing you, it sounds like it's improved so much.### Assistant: It's improved a heck of a lot, considering when it first happened and the files that Mom had of it. And now, the fact that it's gotten to where you wouldn't even know it was there.


### Human: And how are things going with Mom at the moment?### Assistant: All right.


### Human: All right. What's changed that it's all right?### Assistant: I'm not 100% sure to be honest. I sort of just haven't bothered to-- I sort of just-- when I get home Mom's like-- don't do a lot of stuff with me anymore. It's sort of steering away from her. Not too much. The fact that she feels like we're totally trying to ignore her and not doing anything with her, but sort of keeping her out of-- sort of it's more her and I doing stuff than rather Mom.


### Human: What do you mean? Just so I'm understanding.### Assistant: So it would just be mom and I on the computers, and it wouldn't be exactly Mom being around us. That sort of thing. So it was only just mom and I sort of not confrontating with Mom as much. So--


### Human: And how are you not confrontating ??### Assistant: By sort of not talking a lot to Mom as I used to. Trying to avoid me saying something, or me getting angry at Mom or something like that. So sort of avoiding that side of things.


### Human: And is that the way you'd like things to be? Would you like them to be different?### Assistant: At the moment it's working, so, and I'm a lot happier because of it.


### Human: Do you think it'll work in the long term, or would you like it to look different?### Assistant: I guess it'll work till the end of the year at least. And then obviously, we've got to address what we do then. Whether or not we keep being with Mom as much as we are because at that stage, things don't exactly get taken to court.


### Human: Yeah. Because you're 16 then. Yeah.### Assistant: Because we're 16. That's my understanding of it at the moment. That and I sort of don't want to take it to court because we're sort of getting to the point where we can make our decisions. That sort of stuff, so.


### Human: And how would you like things to look like with Mom? I know that's a big question.### Assistant: Sort of seeing her for a few days, and spending that time without-- I guess, without it being annoying or getting annoyed by Mom.


### Human: Without being annoyed by Mom. Yeah.### Assistant: So being happy while we're there, instead of being miserable. That sort of stuff.


### Human: That sounds like a really lovely thing that you'd want. Are you planning to have the family session this week?### Assistant: I have no idea. Mom still hasn't spoken to me about the family session at all. So I don't know if it's happening at all.


### Human: What are your thoughts about it? I can definitely check if it's still on.### Assistant: I'm not exactly keen on it.


### Human: Yeah. What makes you not keen on it?### Assistant: Because I know she won't listen because we've done a lot of stuff in the past with Mom and Dad, and she hasn't exactly listened.


### Human: And how has she--### Assistant: She doesn't because that's just Mom. And our uncle, which is Mom's brother, knows that she's never going to-- she's never going to listen because if something is her idea, she's used to it. So that's what--


### Human: She died.### Assistant: That's just her, and he said that she's not going to change for a very, very long time, until she ends up losing something that-- - or us going in different direction away from them. She may end up listening or figuring out. But she said at the moment she may only realize that until she's a lot older, when she looks back at what happened.


### Human: And would it be helpful too if you had the session on Thursday, to plan together what you'd like to say?### Assistant: : I'm just not keen on talking to Mom.


### Human: Yeah. Because you're saying Mom won't listen. Is that--### Assistant: Yeah. And just sort of I don't like having these sorts of conversations with Mom.


### Human: Would it be--### Assistant: Because it always ends here.


### Human: --helpful to say that's the topic of conversation? To go, "I'm really not comfortable because I feel nothing's going to change." Is that something you could say?### Assistant: To be honest, I don't know.


### Human: Because that says a lot to me, you saying that will-- "I currently don't know if there's any point in talking because I don't feel things can change." That's a really hard thing to say. Totally your choice of what you will say, but I thought we could use the space to practice that to see what you feel comfortable-- how it sounds.### Assistant: Yeah. It's just at the moment I might rethink it. It's just at the moment I sort of just want to keep going because I know that we'll start talking about stuff, and I'll either get angry or-- and then I'll end up being unhappy. And that's what sort of happens--


### Human: As in here right now, or in a session with Mom?### Assistant: In a session with Mom because I've spoken to Mom in the past, and it's taken me weeks, even longer to get over it because I--


### Human: So--### Assistant: --get so angry, or--


### Human: Can we do a hypothetical? If you have the session on Thursday, you start feeling angry, what can you do? Because I'm hearing that's what you don't want to happen. So if those feelings-- what happens in your body when you start feeling angry? Because that's the first step to recognize.### Assistant: I end up don't listening. Not--


### Human: Yeah. Not listening. Yeah. Is there anything that goes on in your body?### Assistant: Sort of just bottle it up.


### Human: Yeah. So if you start feeling you're bottling it up, what can you do in that situation?### Assistant: I don't know.


### Human: What do you think would be helpful? So what's important for me is that you can feel that you're okay in a session so that you're not feeling then not okay for a few weeks. And I can pass this information on to her also, so she knows. So I can throw out a few ideas if that'll be helpful.### Assistant: Yeah.


### Human: Yeah. So it could be you go, "I'm not feeling okay. I'm going to walk out for a break." You could have a system of a word or a card that you put down, saying, "I need a break," or, "I'm not feeling comfortable." What do you think could work?### Assistant: I don't know.


### Human: I can see in your face now, "I'm really not comfortable with this session," and I'm pretty sure it is booked in. It'd be good to either chat to Mom about it, or if you are coming in here-- because I want you to feel okay in the session.### Assistant: Yeah. Mom at the moment is the fact that she doesn't see harm. She sees it as something wrong with us, not with her, and she sort of does this sort of stuff helping us, but the fact that she actually should be getting help for herself. The reason why we did headspace was to get help for us from all that sort of stuff, and yeah, but she never did anything for her. And that's what was really-- the problem was the fact that the way she was dealing with stuff when we spoke about Dad when we were


### Human: And do you think you have a problem?### Assistant: I don't see myself as having an attitude problem whenever-- all that sort of stuff that she says that I do. She says I have an attitude problem, or it's because of someone--


### Human: What do you mean--### Assistant: --else, but she doesn't accept that it's not the way-- she always saw it as the fact that she is doing no wrong, and that she's not hurting anyone by doing anything, and the fact that she's doing the best. She may be doing the best, but in her eyes it's-- in my eyes especially, she's not--


### Human: So I'm hearing that in her eyes she's doing the best she can, and to you it's why I'd like Mom to do a few things differently, but that's really hard to say to Mom because you feel she won't listen to what you say.### Assistant: Well, she doesn't because she has an idea in her head, and she doesn't-- she'll have an idea in her head, and she'll pretend she is listening to someone else, but really, she knows what she's going to do, and that's whatever she wants to do, and that's how she's always been. And I was speaking to Dad, and when we used to be annoying when we were kids, she used to punish us by hitting us with a wooden spoon, and Dad said that he didn't want that. Yelling at us was something. So that is someth


### Human: Yeah. So it sounds like the way they parent is very different.### Assistant: Yeah. Dad was always the fact that yelling or talking would be a better option than hitting or with force, and that's how Mom grew up, and that's how she-- and that's how she's had it, so that's how she does it. And Dad grew up with being spoken to or yelled or that sort of thing instead of being hit, and that's what he didn't agree with. And the fact that he said that Mom's always been like that, and her uncle said that she's always been like that because when she gets an idea in her head,


### Human: Would it be helpful to talk to Mom about cutting the session?### Assistant: So I've sort of given up on talking to her, and--


### Human: Is that something where you feel you go, "At the moment I feel it's really hard to talk to you because I feel you dismiss me"?### Assistant: Well, I think it makes me a lot happier when I don't talk about that sort of stuff. I sort of try to push that stuff aside so I can be close enough to a kid with a normal life because obviously, it's never going to be normal.


### Human: What is a normal life?### Assistant: Having two parents that live together with their kids in one house. That sort of thing.


### Human: And why is that a normal life?### Assistant: Because that's what most kids have.


### Human: Is that what most kids have though?### Assistant: Most kids do.


### Human: Well, I would say--### Assistant: Some kids have other lives, where they either don't have a dad, they don't a mom, or they don't have parents at all, and I see that as the fact that they don't exactly have-- yeah. They don't have something that every kid is born into, where they have a mom and a dad, and they both live together, and they both are in some sort of building.


### Human: And that is ,--### Assistant: A house or--


### Human: So ---### Assistant: --apartment. That sort of stuff.


### Human: Which is society's expectations because there's a lot of people, Mom and Dad aren't together, some people have two moms or two dads. It's not necessary that it's a mom or dad, and things can happen, and things can change, but I can understand you've grown up for 14 years, roughly, with Mom and Dad.### Assistant: Yeah. I grew for a long time with me knowing that, and then I've considered that-- now, looking back at it, I considered that that was my normal life, and it's changed, and I've found myself a lot happier when I was back there. So I sort of push that sort of side of stuff away. All the things to do with court. Stuff to do with Mom and Dad--


### Human: Because that's--### Assistant: --away, and sort of focused on friends, socializing, sport, that sort of stuff, and sort of tried to get it as close to what it was like before it all happened.


### Human: And these are the things that I can feel you have control over. Your friends, sport, but with family, you haven't had a lot of control over. Am I hearing?### Assistant: Yeah. And I've spoken to a friend about that, and he said that he doesn't really bother about his mom and dad at all, not being together. He sort of focuses on the fact before that. And--


### Human: So those things that were there before parents separated. Is that right?### Assistant: Yeah.


### Human: I'm thinking I'm getting it.### Assistant: Because he's got stepsisters as well. He's got a stepsister and a stepbrother, and he also has his real brother, and he also has a real sister. And he sort of focused on before that, and he said that it helped him a lot, and it still does. So I've sort of done that, and have found myself to be a lot happier because it's been the fact that I've gone back to before it even happened, the most happiest memory I had, and that's, I guess-- I sort of found that out, and I've tried to focus, and it'


### Human: And totally understandable.### Assistant: Yeah. And yeah, it's what could have gotten happier and not talking about this sort of stuff and not bothering about the sort of problems and trying to focus on-- yeah. Trying to focus on what happened before.


### Human: And if you want to talk about that stuff, this is where we can talk about it. It's a safe place to talk about that kind of stuff. Because sometimes if we put a lot of things aside one day, they can all come up and become overwhelming, for some people. But it's really important to find those things that you can find you do have control over because you've gone through a lot in the past year. A lot of changes. So it makes sense that your friends and your sport are things you're focusing on bec### Assistant:


### Human: And do you feel you still have Mom and Dad?### Assistant: Yeah. I just don't think of them as Mom and Dad. I think of them as Mom and Dad--


### Human: Yeah. I get what you mean. Yeah.### Assistant: Yeah. I don't think of them as Mom and Dad.


### Human: Mom and Dad. Yeah.### Assistant: I think, yeah, they're still Mom and Dad, but I think before they were Mom and Dad.


### Human: Yeah. So now you think of it as Mom--### Assistant: I think of them as Mom and Dad.


### Human: Mom, Dad, and it was Mom and Dad. That, yeah?### Assistant: Yeah. So instead of having Mom here and Dad there, I see them as, yeah, they're there, but I still have Mom and Dad.


### Human: Yeah. We're on the same page. We're wording it in the way it processes in our head on the same page, and that's really important to remember, that you do have-- Mom's still there and Dad's still there.### Assistant: It's just they're not there if you know what I mean. They're not always there. Dad's not always going to be there every single day, Mom's not always going to be there every single day, but I still have Mom and Dad.


### Human: And that's really important to remember, and they would care about you just as much as they did before they were separated, but it'd be very hard, I'd imagine, to process that it's not Mom and Dad under the same roof. "--### Assistant: Yeah. And I've tried to focus on the fact that, yeah, Dad's not with us every single day. He's not coming home. We don't see him in the morning every single day. But yet, we still see Dad and we still see Mom.


### Human: Yeah. That's exactly right. And it sounds like it's been hard with now understanding how things work with Mom because you feel that she dismisses a lot of what you say, yeah? Was that like that before?### Assistant: It still was.


### Human: Was. Yeah.### Assistant: It was just Mom, and I sort of figured out that that's always been Mom, and recently speaking to her uncle, he said that Mom's always been like that, even when she was-- yeah. Even before this, she was always like that, and he says--


### Human: And I--### Assistant: --she's not going to change for a very long time.


### Human: And I wonder if she doesn't even realize that she does this because it's just automatic.### Assistant: Because it's just her.


### Human: Yeah. So it could be helpful for you to mention this goes on in a gentle way, but I get that would be--### Assistant: Yeah. I guess, just sort of calm. If that's always been her, you sort of can't say to someone, "Oh, that's your personality, but I don't like it, so can you change it?" So I see that as that's Mom's personality, and it is Mom's personality. No, not her personally. That's what she does, and saying, "All right. You're doing this, but I want you to totally, completely scrap that and take on this." I see that as the fact that it may take an extremely long time, and I don't see that as--


### Human: Is it something that you think would be helpful for you?### Assistant: That over time. I reckon that it would take her more than a few months. I reckon it'll take up to two, three years for her to figure out--


### Human: Yeah. And you're right. It could take--### Assistant: --or change little things. Even to change one little thing, it may take her a year and a half, or it may even take her longer. I see that as sort of a very--


### Human: Long term.### Assistant: Something that goes for a long time. Something that goes for a long time, but with very--


### Human: No. You're making sense. Yeah.### Assistant: I'm trying to figure out a word. For something that goes on and someone that is trying to change that goes on for a very long time, you only get little bits every time. So it's sort of like over four or five years, but you only get tiny bits.


### Human: So slowly, slowly over four and five years.### Assistant: But yet the fact that if, I guess-- I'm finding it hard to work. I'm trying to find the right words. I guess if you sort of-- I guess dismiss that. I guess you can sort of figure out ways to get around it, and that's what I don't have at the moment, and that's ways of getting around how Mom works. Not her personality. It's how she works.


### Human: What do you mean by that because I think I 80% understand what you mean?### Assistant: So how she has parented us for our whole lives, and that's how when she-- I'm trying to-- that's how her brain-- that's how her brain works.


### Human: Yeah. Because that's the way it's always been.### Assistant: So when she has-- yeah. This is the way it's always been because when she has an idea in her head, her brain goes, "All right. That's what I'm going to do." And she's done that for her whole life, and it's something that you've done. So I haven't liked lamb and pork for a very long time, and trying to eat those sort of things, it sort of goes, "No. I don't like that. I'm not going to eat it." And it takes a long time to get back to eat it because it's taking me a long time to even start eati


### Human: Yeah. You're telling me that change is possible there.### Assistant: But over a very long time. When it happened, I wasn't eating any pork, any lamb, and hardly any beef. I was only eating sausages. Things that I really enjoyed. And it's taken me four or five years to get back into eating a lot more meats and eating a lot more parts of beef. Eating a bit more pork. It's taken me something like three years to eat little cubes of bacon. Even though they're tiny, little things, it's taking me so long, and it's had a lot of effort from me. Something that yo


### Human: Was it worth it?### Assistant: It was.


### Human: So--### Assistant: But it took me a very-- it took me an extremely long time, and I succeeded, yeah, but for me, just to eat tiny cubes of bacon, and I spent three years trying to eat tiny cubes of bacon. I see that as the fact that for the amount of effort you put in, it's only tiny.


### Human: But you told me it was worth it.### Assistant: Yeah. It was, but over a long period of time. Yeah. It may be worth it, but I think maybe when I have a bit more freedom-- this is important for next year because we're almost adults, we have more freedom. We can do more things because I don't have to wait until Wednesday when we go back to Dad's, or I don't have to wait until Sunday. Sorry. I don't have to wait till Friday to get back to Dad's.


### Human: What's freedom look like?### Assistant: Me being able to stay at Mom and Dad's whenever I want. So I might have Monday, Tuesday, Wednesdays for an example with Dad, and I might spend Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday with Mom if I feel like it. Or I can jump between Mom and Dad's place without getting in trouble for it.


### Human: Well, I can go to Mom and Dad's. What other things?### Assistant: That's what I see as freedom, and then to go down the street, or getting to do things with Dad, and not seeing Dad-- so Mom not having a go at how Dad parents. That's how I see it as.


### Human: Yeah. Because it's your choice where you want to go.### Assistant: Yeah. But Mom has always seen it as Dad's doing. So if we went to Dad's after Mom and-- dad and I used to fight with Mom. We went to Dad's a few times. Mom saw that as Dad getting us to come here when it was out of hours, and that's what we found as us being in this little box where we can just be moved and moved and moved wherever we want. So my freedom is to be able to go between Mom and Dad's house and being able to be more independent. Being able to choose what I want to do and wh


### Human: Is that something that you could talk to Mom about in a session with dad, around wanting more independence? What can that look like for the next six months?### Assistant: Mostly, again, the fact that that's how Mom's always done stuff because she wasn't allowed to do that sort of stuff. That's how she sees as what we should be brought up as. That's how she was brought up. So she's like, "Well, it worked, so I'm going to do it." And--


### Human: Do you think there's any smaller ways that work that maybe you can have a little bit more freedom? Because you are turning 16. So that makes sense you want more independence. And I'm wondering if you were to--### Assistant: Especially your driving. You're learning to drive. That's a stack of independence in itself.


### Human: Is that a way we can word in the session? So not saying, "Mom, I feel dismissed by you." It's, "Mom, I would like more independence. What can we do about that so that I'm feeling happier?"### Assistant: At the moment because of the court orders and all that sort of stuff, we have set days. And that's what I don't want is set days where you have to be here, you have to be here. I want sort of days you can be here, and you can be here. You don't have to be here, and you don't have to be here. Have to and can is what I want to change. Is the fact that you have to be at Mom's on these days. You have to be at Dad's on these days. Otherwise, you get in trouble. It's not that you can be at Dad's o


### Human: And is that something reasonable right now, or is that something you feel in six months' time?### Assistant: I feel in six months' time would be a lot more easier because A, with 16 you get to decide, and we can jump between houses, but we can sort of, I think, explain to Mom that's why we did it. Just the fact that-- I just lost what I was about to say then. Sorry.


### Human: The can. I've written it down. The have to, the can. What is it--### Assistant: Because that's what we wanted to do. So we saw that as a fact because now we've got that tiny bit of freedom to bounce between houses. I guess we can build up the fact that that's why we did it, was to get that.


### Human: Maybe it's also around Mom because you said going down the street's hard for Mom. Is there a way that she can feel more comfortable for you to do that? Say, during the day. You've got your phone on. You're somewhere. She can build trust with you.### Assistant: She sort of sees that as people hanging around the shops or going to the shops by themselves. It's just kids. She says that is thuggish. So all the kids that muck around or cause trouble. That sort of stuff. That's what she sees that as. And--


### Human: Is there a middle ground do you think you can come up with that? Because I think that'll be good for her to know something important to you is to be more independent.### Assistant: Yeah. I don't really know to be honest.


### Human: And maybe that's why we need Mom in the room to go, "Well, what is okay?" What isn't okay to Mom? What can she find as a middle ground?### Assistant: The other side of it is the fact that I don't exactly want to be in there with Mom. That's the other side of it, yeah, if we were to have it, but I don't exactly want to be in there when it happens. Yeah. Mom goes in, and then she comes in and speaks to us, and then goes back in. Swap in and out and that sort of thing. But I don't exactly want to be in there with Mom.


### Human: And it's your choice if you want to have the session. As I said last time, I'm not forcing you, that you need to go or whatnot. That opportunity is there. If you don't want to do it, that's okay too. And I didn't mention last time because I know it's you and me because I could sit in with you also, but then I know he doesn't have someone else sitting in with him. So I wasn't sure what you would think about that too because I want it to be even for both of you too.### Assistant: Yeah. I guess I'm going to speak to dad about it, and I know he's probably going to go no, but I'll speak to him anyway. And I reckon at a later stage it would be a lot easier, like I said because when we had that bit of freedom, where the fact that we can go between houses, and if Mom doesn't like it, she's not exactly going to get looked at at court. That's the thing that I want Mom to get out of her head, that if we want to do something, if we want to stay at Dad's for that sort of


### Human: And I'm hearing--### Assistant: --and a half. The fact that she's relied on court has been the fact-- you can't just buy court orders. When something's put in-- something. Something is put in-- my tongue's getting a bit lazy. It's been like this all day.


### Human: You're right. End of the day.### Assistant: It's slurry. My voice gets extremely slurry when it gets to the end of the day. In the morning and close to the end of the day.


### Human: You've been good when we've had other afternoon appointments.### Assistant: Yeah. It's just I have no idea why, but the past few weeks I've had an extremely slurry voice. It's--


### Human: I wonder what that's about.### Assistant: I have no idea. It's just I can't find the words. Anyway. So it's just I wanted to stop relying-- the fact that, yeah, because as a citizen of Australia, you can't really disobey the court orders because you're here and the court's there. So they're higher, and the waiver they put in place is-- obviously, you have to obey it, like you have to pay a parking fine. You have to pay a speeding ticket. You have to do this. If you kill someone, that's your sentence. You have to do it. So I sort of


### Human: And it could be a good idea to speak about it sooner, so you know this is what I'm thinking. How we can we find that middle ground? And I know that's a really hard thing to do with Mom, and if you're feeling it's something you want the two of us with Mom to say in the future, we can do that too because I want to work with you. I don't want you to feel I'm telling you what to do because you are an independent young man, and that's so important to you, to be independent. And if you ever feel I### Assistant:


### Human: Would it be better to do it a little bit sooner, so Mom has a bit of a heads-up too? Your choice.### Assistant: I was sort of aiming to do it before January. Our birthday's on the way. So she at least has-- I was going to say something. Then I lost it again. Second time.


### Human: So you can kind of-- get back together?### Assistant: So she has that time to sort of say, "All right. Well, instead of doing this or--" Because I know if we say it now, I know she's going to-- I know exactly what she's going to do, and she's going to go straight to court with it, and I just fear the fact that the courts will stop us from doing it. That's why I don't want-- I want to give her enough time to comprehend it, but not enough time to organize something to go with court because I know that she-- now, she may not or she may, but I don'


### Human: So I'm hearing you'd like something to be put in place without the courts involved.### Assistant: Yes. So I see the fact that giving her notice, but not enough for her to make action to it. If that sort of makes sense.


### Human: Yeah, no. That makes sense.### Assistant: So she has time to think on it like, "I don't want them to, so what can I do?" or, "We can talk." So we can maybe talk for two or three days.


### Human: We--### Assistant: But also, the other thing is the fact that I don't want her parents to be there - so her nana and granddad - because that's also-- the fact that they side with her because obviously, that's their--


### Human: It's their daughter. Yeah.### Assistant: That's their daughter. So they're going to say also sort of like, "Well, Mom's doing the best for it," and like I said, she is probably doing the best, but in our eyes, and especially in mine-- I know that , on the same page. To us it feels like she isn't trying hard enough, and they're going to see--


### Human: What would you like her to do? What would her trying hard enough look like for you?### Assistant: The biggest part of her trying her hardest is giving us a bit of independence to do whatever. To jump between houses. So let's say I had my football stuff at Dad's, and I have it there as well. I had my football stuff at Dad's, and I texted her and said, "Look. I was planning on going back to Dad's. I was going to get changed there, walk to football training," because it's literally only a two-minute walk. " over the road, "and go to football training, and you can take me hom


### Human: Yeah. And I'm hearing--### Assistant: And Mom didn't see that as-- Mom saw that as me going there and spending more time with Dad, which she doesn't like, when she's meant to have us. So she went, "No," and the fact that she would drop me-- she dropped me off there, go and grab my stuff, go back, get changed, and then I could relax at home, and I wasn't relaxed because I was agitated. The fact that Mom didn't let me do it, and that there was no-- I didn't see it as being practical.


### Human: Yeah. What I'm hearing from Mom's point of view, "It's my day with you. I want to have as much time with you."### Assistant: To Mom, that was a good idea, but that was her idea, so she stuck with it, and that's, again, going back to the fact that that's how Mom's brain works. And I saw that as not very practical. Saves Mom less time, and saves me less mucking around because obviously, if let's say, I had forgotten something, I'd have to then go back and get it. So if I would have been there, I could spend time to go, "All right. This is what I need. This is what I need." But Mom said no. In and out. Two minutes th


### Human: So I'm hearing what you'd like is for Mom to be a little bit calmer around-- sometimes things don't go to plan, and it's not--### Assistant: Yeah. And to give a bit more freedom, and the fact that I can go there, and she'll go, "All right. thanks, but I'll drive you back home." Like, "How sweet."


### Human: But I'm hearing at the moment, that's too hard for Mom to do because it's that day she's meant to see you.### Assistant: And again, she-- I guess, yeah, it's her day to see us, yeah, but I would prefer her to go-- instead of the fact that that's her day, to go over a fortnight, we can see Mom as much as we want, and Dad as much as we want. We might spend a week at Mom's and a week at Dad's, and we might spend two days with Mom and the rest with Dad, or we might spend two days with Dad and the rest with Mom. I want her to see the fact that that's not her allocated time. I don't want that to be her allocated tim


### Human: So I'm hearing you want to have more of a choice in it.### Assistant: Yeah. And that's what the-- again, going back to our birthday. That's when we get to because we're officially 16 years old, and we can then really-- and go, "Yeah. That's what I want to do."


### Human: And maybe the take home message from today is having to think about now and for the next six months, are there any small things that you can do to be more independent?### Assistant: Or is there any other things that would help me get closer to being independent. That's what I've got to figure out. If I can find little things that may draw her closer to--


### Human: And is--### Assistant: --sort of geting rid of the fact that taking our opinions on board, or what we want on board, and actually talking through it instead of her going, "Yeah. I'll take it on board," but just going , and just chucking it straight away.


### Human: So Mom actually listening. Yeah.### Assistant: So she's listening, but she's not hearing. So it's going in, she's listened to it--


### Human: ##h. Yeah.### Assistant: She's listened, but she hasn't heard what we're trying to say. I guess that's a better way of explaining that's how her brain works. I think that's, I guess, a better way of saying it. It's the fact that she's heard. So she's listened, but she hasn't heard. At the moment, the independence is one of my biggest things. At the moment is the fact that-- so we can see Dad when there's no allocated times to see Mom and Dad because--


### Human: But it sounds like--### Assistant: I guess if we want to get away from Mom, if we've had a fight, we can go, "Oh," and we can walk down to Dad's, and we won't get in trouble for it because we don't have allocated times. But if we're angry at Mom or angry at Dad, we can't go anywhere because that's allocated times. But I know if we were angry at Dad and we wanted to go back to Mom's, he'd obviously, "Yeah," but he'd want us to think about it and see if we wanted to stay there, or he goes, "All right. If you want to go back, yo