FRIDAY


"Hey fearless leader, wake up, your people demand it." Shrimpy says tapping you on the shoulder.

Groggily you sit up, you swear you feel like you've barely gotten any sleep at all. Shrimpy stands nearby along with Klepto, the dwarf woman who "endorsed" you yesterday and a wiry scraggily looking man. You think he runs one of those carny games…specifically the one where you shoot a water gun at a clown's mouth.

"What's going on?" you ask.
"What's going on is a bunch of shit, that's what darling. After the midgets here…"
"Fuck you Jack, we're DWARVES." The dwarf woman interrupts.
"Whatever Dolores. Anyway after the…little people rounded up all the military supplies last night I got one of their radios tuned in to other military frequencies. Turns out that the nearby town has been overrun with those things we killed yesterday. The poor bastard that I spoke to just before it sounded like he got his guts ripped out said they don't know whether it was a virus or not., just that there were a shitload of them. Either way I say we got lucky that only a few wandered out this far. We need to get the fuck outta here."
"My town…wow…uh…" you say being surprised by this revelation. You really are at a loss for words right now. You start to think about your real family and even Bobby. Are they okay? Are they already dead? Are they one of those things?

"Suzy? You okay? You're spacing out." Klepto says.
"Huh, yeah, I'm just…okay yeah we obviously need to get out of here. Start packing up the rest of our stuff and…"
"Sweetheart didn't you hear what I said? I said there's probably fucking crazed cannibals on their way here right fucking now! We ain't got time for that shit! We need to just load up as much supplies we can and take off in our vehicles. This is the fucking end times man!" Jack says.
"It's not going to take that much longer to pack down, we had most of the stuff ready to go before the National Guard arrived. Some of our people are still wounded badly and need the rest as well. Besides, living in our trailers is going to be a lot more desirable than living in just a regular vehicle if there is a complete collapse of society going on right now." Shrimpy remarks.
"Okay then Tom Thumb YOU and the rest of the lollipop kids do it. Me and some of the others? We're taking supplies and leaving. Not stayin' around here waiting to be cannibal chow."

You've been in charge for less than one full day and already someone is threatening to break away and worse, not even taking any notice of you. You just bludgeoned crazed freaks to death yesterday, you're tired of not being taken seriously.

"Jack, if you or others want to leave you're free to do so, but what you're not doing is taking any of those military supplies from here. Those belong to the carnival and as such belong to all of us. Now if you don't want any part of that any longer, lots of luck, but you and anyone else that wants to leave you go with what personal items you came with."
"Pfft, whatever. I didn't elect you as leader. I'm only telling you as a courtesy, you can stay here and get eaten or come along and I can keep you safe. In fact to pass the time we can play shoot the clown in the mouth, except it won't be water going in your mouth, it'll be my…"

Jack isn't expecting you to kick him in the balls. The moment you do he winces and crumples. You follow up with a knee to his face. He's down and you have everyone's attention in the tent.

"That's the last fucking blow job reference I'm going to hear from you or ANYONE else for that matter. Now listen up, as I remember most of you were fine with me being in charge yesterday and goddamn it that's what I'm going to do, be in fucking charge. This is STILL our carnival, that hasn't changed and I'm not going to let it fall apart just because the rest of society seems to be. Now this is what we're going to do, we're going to finish packing up our shit, get our trailers and such in order, we're going to also take the military trucks and then we're going to move on. Now if some of those geeks show up well we've got some brand new rifles and pistols to try them out on. Anyone who doesn't like this plan can leave with the shirts on their back and nothing else! Now let's stop fighting and get some of this damn shit done!"

At this point those that are in condition to work, proceed to do so.

"What about him?" Shrimpy asks pointing at Jack who is still on the ground.
"Throw his ass out, he made his decision." You remark and then notice Dolores smiling.
"What're you smiling about?" you demand.
"Nothing, but I'm beginning to like you, blondie." Dolores says and then whistles over several dwarves who promptly pick up Jack and haul him away. Dolores then leaves to go tend to other matters. Shrimpy says he's going to go help and leaves as well, leaving you alone with Klepto.

"Well, looks like you underwent quite a change while I was knocked out yesterday. I like it. Assertiveness is an attractive trait on you."
"Klepto, I've got a lot on my mind and I'm in no mood for your nice guy trying to get into my pants routine right now." You say.
"Okay, okay, sheesh, I'm just…nevermind…fuck I'll just leave you alone ringmaster." Klepto says and walks off.

You can't worry about Klepto's fragile ego right now, you've got bigger concerns and that's on top of still thinking about your "old" family. You know you made the decision to leave them all, but that was still just a few days ago and you still never wanted any of them to suffer at the hands of whatever the hell those things are.

Speaking of which you still have to worry about those geeks. Jack might've been out of line, but he still might've been correct about some wandering towards the carnival like those yesterday did. Considering the dwarves still seem to be the largest faction and friendliest toward you, you have some of them armed with the rifles to stand on top of the trailers and keep a look out. You keep yourself busy by helping with the clean up.

Hours pass and that's when your lookouts see something approaching. Not the geeks, but rather a few pick up trucks which look like they're holding several men carrying shotguns and rifles. You call everyone to immediately take a defensive position and to fall back.

You aren't sure what to expect, but a bunch of heavily armed men can't ever be a good thing. Unfortunately as leader, you're going to have to be the one to handle this visit, hopefully peacefully if you can.

As the pick up trucks stop, you stand several feet away with your "snipers" keep a bead on your visitors. You hang on to your own rifle and several other carnies do likewise. One of the men gets out one of the trucks with his hands up. Looks like a redneck, in fact you imagine this lot are from the trailer park a few miles down the road.

"It's okay, it's okay li'l lady, I see yer guys up there. Ain't nobody lookin' for a fight." He says.
"Doesn't look that way, given that you've come with three trucks full of armed men and don't tell me its hunting season." You say.
"Heh, well I'm sure given your own heightened state of awareness, you know things are getting' dangerous nowadays. Anyway my name's Mel, I'm guessin' since you're the one talkin' you're in charge here. Ringmaster or something like that?"
"Something exactly like that." you say.
"Okay. You…uh…got some military gear here too I see. That truck over there."
"Yeah, what of it?"
"Oh nothing, but that brings about the question of where are the guardsmen…heh yeah they tried to tell us what to do too. Didn't work out so well. The second amendment says you got the right to pack it after all. Government can't just do what they want."

At this point more of Mel's men get out of their trucks as well. Your people and Mel's people are both starting to eye each other waiting for someone to fire a shot.

"Look let me cut to the chase honey. I'm assumin' you might know by now what's been happenin' back in town. Besides the government tryin' to pull their shit, there's a bunch of freaks runnin' around tryin' to eat people. A bunch of them attacked us last night and while we fought them off, some of us got badly hurt and are in need of medical supplies. Now of course we did try goin' into town first, but was just too fucked up there an' we didn't make much head way what with the freaks AND the guard all over the damn place. Then it occurred to me today that your circus might still be around and the National Guard probably would've been here as well so we decided to investigate. Now the group of weekend warriors at the trailer park had shit for medical supplies. So I'm hoping your detachment had more in that department."

Mel looks up at your dwarves upon the trailers.

"Now you might get a few of us, but I'm bettin, most of us are better shots than y'all, so if you give us what medicine supplies you do have we'll leave here in peace, if not well…"

At this point things could get very violent very quickly.

You continue to negotiate

Being a "native" of the area, you do know something of the types that do live in the trailer park. Most of them probably do nothing else except practice-shooting beer cans all damn day. Mel, is most likely right in that his people are going to be better shots and a gun battle is going to result in a lot of dead on your side.

However you can't just let them take your stuff, especially since you're using a lot of it and there isn't much to begin with.

"Well, if we had the extra supplies we might be inclined to share, the fact is we don't have much and what little we have, well we need. You start a shooting match here and you're likely to wind up with more dead and wounded than what was worth the effort." You reply.
"You'll forgive me if I don't believe you darlin'." Mel replies.
"It's true, seriously come on in and take a look yourself. We got a shitload of wounded ourselves in that big tent back there. Just you though, the rest of your people can stand out here and look fearsome."

Mel chuckles.

"Oh just me huh? And as soon as I go in I'm at your fuckin' mercy. Nah, I don't think so."
"Fine so take me as hostage. Here…" you say and drop your rifle and walk over to Mel. A couple people shout at you, but you just wave a hand at them as if to tell them to calm down. Meanwhile Mel stands watching you approach. When you're before him, he's definitely staring you up and down.

"You got a pistol I presume?" you ask Mel.
"Yeah."
"Well pull it out and put it to my head." You say turning around and putting your body against Mel's and then putting one of his arms around your waist.

"Well… shit girl, you're just somethin' else ain't cha?" Mel says barely keeping his composure as he pulls out his pistol.
"If you say so. In any case you now have a little insurance that should be good enough for you shouldn't it? I mean…I'm putting my complete trust in you. You're in complete control" you say and grind up against Mel's body a little more while turning your head a bit to flutter your eyes at him.

Mel is at a loss for words, but his buddies aren't.

"Woo Hoo, looks like the li'l blonde number is sweet on ya Mel!"
"I say we take her back, instead of medical supplies. I never liked Bobby Ray to begin with. Motherfucker can bleed out fer all I care!"
"You plannin' on tradin' Tina up fer her?
"Why's Mel get all the pretty ones? He's already got Tina, I say one of us should get the blonde!"

At this point some arguing breaks out, followed by Mel shouting at them to shut the fuck up. He then turns his attention back to you.

"Heh… you …you are trouble girlie. If I took you back to the trailer park, you'd probably have every man ripping each other apart over you. I can barely keep these dumb fuckers from doing that now. In any case, let's go look at the medical supply situation. Come on." Mel says motioning you to move.
"As you wish." You say.

Mel and you head back towards the carnival where upon you give him the "grand tour" showing him that it is indeed true that you don't really have much in the way of medical supplies. He also sees all the people that are wounded too.

"Hmm, well I suppose y'all COULD still be hidin' such things somewhere, but honestly I'm inclined to believe ya. This place has even less military vehicles than the ones that were at the trailer park and it sounds like from what you told me there weren't even that many guardsmen here. From the amount of wounded I see, you probably did use up most of the pittance that the military brought with them…how did you get all these wounded though? Nobody looks like they're suffering from gunshot wounds. The cannibal creeps?"
"Nope. All these wounded are from each other. Long story, let's just say carny politics is complicated and I came out on top." You reply confidently.
"I see…well you have certainly displayed a certain amount of balls putting yourself in the vulnerable position you did. (Sigh) All right, you dealt straight with me, so I'll deal straight with you. Guess we'll try the town again."

At this point you and Mel head back to the "neutral zone" where upon Mel releases you (reluctantly) and waves at his people to get ready to go.

As they drive away, you breathe a heavy sigh of relief and rush back to the others. Dolores approaches you when you arrive.

"Well that was an interesting way to handle things, but it worked. Those good ol' boys woulda probably killed and wounded a lot more of us."
"Yeah, an' now we need to get the hell out of here. I don't trust them to not come back with a bigger group and attack us anyway."
"Well, we probably could've done with a bit more of a rest, but I can't argue with that logic, they weren't the most reputable lookin' an' you're the boss. One good thing about having some recently departed, is that the trailers have a lot more room in them now. Speaking of which, your own trailer is already hooked up to a truck. We should be ready to roll in about an hour."

Feeling like you deserve a rest after recent events, you head back to your trailer to relax.

As soon as you enter though, you are suddenly grabbed and tackled to the floor and the stench of bad body odor fills your nostrils.

"Don't scream bitch." A familiar voice whispers. You get a good look at your assailant and see a man with half worn clown make up on his face.

It's Ranko and he smells even worse now that he's laying right on top of you.

"I see a lot of fuckin' changes to this here carnival have happened since I've been gone. Saw some of it from afar while hiding and waiting for the best time to strike. Nearly got eaten by those geeks in the process, but heh heh heh, I got away…"

Ranko begins to press his weight on you so you can't wiggle away while keeping one hand on your mouth and holding a straight razor in his other. His whole outfit is filthy presumably from lurking about in the wilderness for days, but you also notice that he's sporting a couple wounds of his own in the form of bite marks.

"Nothing smart to say now bitch? Thought you were the ringmaster now. Head cunt in charge and all that. Fuck you, I SHOULD be in fuckin' charge!"

At this point you manage to bite Ranko's hand, which tastes foul, but it's enough to cause him to take it off your mouth, giving you a chance to scream for help, before he backhands you across the face.

"Bitch! Maybe if I raped you, you'd KNOW who's in fuckin' charge!" he exclaims and fumbles with pulling down his pants, and keeps the straight razor to your throat with his other hand. (Carnies must love straight razors)

All Ranko has to do is make a quick swipe and your throat is going to be opened if you struggle. If you do nothing he may very well rape you assuming nobody heard you scream. Of course he'll probably kill you anyway after he's finished.

You give in

Maybe it's because of everything you've been through within the past week, (not to mention the incident with your uncle) but the oddest thing about this situation is that you're more revolted than scared.

That isn't to say you're not scared though, you don't want to be raped and you certainly don't want to die, especially given everything you've just survived. The thought sickens you, but you realize there might still be a way to avoid your current horrible situation without resisting.

"You gonna treat me like a whore? Come on then do it!" you say.
"What?" Ranko asks.
"Come on, stick it in me daddy. I want to feel…" you start to say when Ranko pushes the razor against your throat that it feels like its going to break the skin.
"You playin' with me bitch?" Ranko says with his face so close to yours that you have to prevent yourself from pulling away due to his bad breath.
"Not at all, you're doin' it the way I like it. Daddy used to come into my room late at night and get rough sometimes, but I knew he only did it because he loved me…"
"You…are one twisted…"

Before Ranko can finish his sentence you muster up the courage and put aside the revulsion long enough to move your head forward to kiss Ranko's lips and even shove your tongue in his mouth.

It's the worst thing you've ever tasted, and it's only due to your strong gag reflex (Yes, if most people knew that about you they'd have a field day with the jokes due to that knowledge) that you don't puke.

Ranko's blade has cut your neck superficially due to moving your head forward, but your action has had the desired effect of him relaxing a bit. Not enough that you'd trust being able to escape or successfully get the straight razor away, but it bought you some time.

"Hah, I KNEW you were into me! No bitch can resist a man who takes charge! You want me to do you like daddy did huh? Well did he ever do this?" Ranko says and then flips you over.

"I'm gonna ride your ASS so hard, you're not gonna shit right for a long time!" he says and starts pulling your pants down.
"Oh no! I'm a virgin back there!" you say in the most innocent way possible, which of course makes Ranko only laugh like the rapist creep he is and rips your panties off.

Meanwhile the blood must've completely left his brain and gone all to his dick, because the idiot dropped his straight razor in his desire to fuck you in the ass. You grab the straight razor, which is now near your hand.

Before Ranko can get his dick into the "promised land" you turn your head and swipe backwards with the razor. He's close enough that you catch him across the face.

"AGH! GODDAMNIT! FUCKING BITCH!" he shouts and falls backwards holding the side of his face. You scramble forward and grab a couple of nearby items before turning around to throw them at him.

He blocks and screams a bunch of obscenities, but before he can advance towards you, someone has at last heard the commotion going on.

"Motherfucker…" Shrimpy says opening up the door and rushes to punch Ranko in the small of the back. Ranko back kicks Shrimpy causing the little guy to fall. Sensing he's no longer in control of the situation, Ranko tries to escape out the door, only to trip and fall awkwardly on his face due to his pants and underwear still being around his ankles.

You aren't about to let Ranko get away with shit, so you plunge the razor into Ranko's ass and twist. His screams are predictable.

"Was it good for you?" you say and then slam his face into the door twice, breaking his nose and causing him to gurgle a bit on his own blood. And for the finisher, you pull the bloody, shitty razor out of his ass and slit his throat with it.

You then fall back and sit on a nearby chair breathing heavily after your ordeal. Shrimpy at this point recovers as well.

"Shit, I know this is a silly question, but are you all right?" he asks.
" (Pant) Well, I'm alright in that at least this fucktard didn't ass rape me, but this wasn't a pleasant experience (pant). Fuck. "
"Well at least its over now…" Shrimpy starts to say before he's interrupted.

(Knock knock) "Hey what's going on in there, heard all this…holy fuck…" Dolores says as she opens up the door revealing Ranko's bloody face as the first thing she sees.
"Nothin' Dolores, just an ex-disgruntled employee. It's been taken care of." You shout.
"SUZY! What happened?! Are you all right?!" you hear Klepto remark from outside.
"Uh, she's fine Klepto, she just needs some time by herself. Why don't you help pull this asshole out of the trailer?" Shrimpy says and gets Ranko's body by the feet while presumably Dolores and Klepto pull the rest of him out of the trailer.

"What the hell happened to his ass? It's all bloody…ugh, this guy smells worse than when he was alive." You hear Dolores say, as the door slams shut.

You grab something to cover your naked lower half with while Shrimpy continues to stand in the doorway, just in case Klepto wants to play "white knight" and come see you.

"Thanks Shrimpy." You say.
"For what, I barely did anything." He replies.
"It was enough that you got here when you did."
"Well I was initially on my way to ask where are next destination was going to be, but I guess that can wait for now. And don't worry I won't be telling Klepto or anyone else about seeing you…well less than fully clothed."
"Well I appreciate that too. As for our next destination, I dunno, with as crazy as things seem to be getting maybe we should just stick to rural areas for awhile."
"Yeah, probably for the best. Well I'll leave now, but remember we're all here when you need to talk."
"Shrimpy?" you call out once more.
"Yes, Suzy?"
"What is your real name?"
"Heh, oh that. Been awhile since anyone used it, but it's Lance."
"Really?"
"Really. I know I don't look like a Lance. You tend to think of a big tall guy with a square jaw. A real hero type."
"Well like I said, you were a hero today."

Lance smiles at this comment and nods before walking out the door.

And you're all by yourself again. You look around the trailer and the new blood stains you're going to have to clean. You immediately lock the door, go wash up and allow yourself to break down a bit in the shower.

Still through the tears, you realize that you're a lot stronger than you could've ever believed. You're also glad you've got a "family" of sorts now, there is some comfort in that.

The rest of your day is spent staying alone in your trailer though given that the whole carnival is soon on the move it isn't like anyone is going to just walk up and knock on your door now.

The motion of the trailer combined with the stress of the day causes you to collapse on your bed and close your eyes as you eventually fall asleep…

Next day…

SATURDAY


A loud noise in the distance wakes you up and you also notice you're no longer moving.

A quick look out one of the window and you see something that is going to change your life more than anything else in the world.

A mushroom cloud.

You're not feeling any tremors or aftershocks, a wave of fire hasn't engulfed you, so you're guessing that it wasn't excessively close, maybe it was even a small one. Still, you can't help but wonder if you're in some sort of deadly radiation radius though. If so there isn't much that can done about it.

"That's it then…the world finally went and did it…" you say to yourself.

You hear some commotion going on outside, presumably several of the carnies are freaking out, arguing, and generally concerned on what to do next. It's a reasonable reaction to a doomsday situation.

You calmly get dressed and make your appearance. It takes a moment, but you soon get everyone's attention.

"Hey! Listen up! This might be the end of civilization as we know it, but it isn't the end of the world! Sure life is going to be harder now, but when hasn't it been for us carnies? Why just this damn week we suffered through a military occupation, an internal civil war, an attack by freaks, and avoided another possible attack by a bunch of rednecks. And hell, I had the extra struggle of trying to fit in here and fight off a rape attempt. No way are we going to descend into anarchy again. We've come too far."

You think you're getting better at making speeches because this time you're seeing less frowning faces and general attentiveness.

"We already drift from place to place providing entertainment as a source of our survival well what has really changed? We can still do that. We WILL still do that. This world just got a whole lot shittier and if we can bring a little joy to some people, well they just might be grateful. And if our entertainment value isn't appreciated, well we ARE nomads and vagabonds by nature. Surely we'll be picking up, collecting, and scavenging useful material, items and the like to trade in our travels. I know we all have useful skills, surely with those, our ability to learn and adapt and a team effort we'll be able to keep this carnival…no this FAMILY together a very long time."

"Yeah! Suzy's right! We can survive this!" someone shouts and several others agree enthusiastically.

This time you are not met with apathy, but with applause. At last you have truly been accepted. You half expect them to all shout "One of us." Over and over, but perhaps that might be a bit too obvious.

In any case, you and some of the others get together to decide where to head next and what to do about food, and fuel. This isn't going to be easy, but then this whole week has been a trial for you.

No longer are you the shy "good" girl who hid away in the basement, harassed by your family and living as one day blurred into the next. You are part of something bigger and not just that, but a leader.

It's a brand new day and this is just the beginning of your brand new life.

…

Greatest Show On Scorched Earth


The Future…

After yet another successful show, the performers of the Cataclysm Carnival begin to pack down for the night and engage in their usual banter.

"Well that was certainly fun. It's been a long time since we got to actually perform an entire show like that." Sparkle remarks while putting away her chainsaws.
"Ha ha ha ha, yeah I wouldn't exacty call General Hellstorm's totalitarian city state civilization, but it was a nice change from the usual shanty towns or worse, those Ground Zero owned shelter communities. God, I sometimes wonder what the fuck happened in some of those places after the bombs hit. I swear most of those folks are more fucked up than the people who got caught on the surface." Randy adds.

Hector and Lucy step inside the trailer.

"I imagine being stuck in close quarters with a bunch of people for long periods of time is bound to make a lot of people weird. I mean you don't have to look too far to see that." Bruno says after hearing part of the conversation.
"I hope you remembered to lock up those cat-rat things, this time. Last time they got out and chewed several holes in one of the trailers." Sparkle says.
"They're called Nibblers and yes, I made sure they're all locked up. I threw in some meat too so they should be good." Hector remarks.
"Hrm, I still dunno how you can work with those things. I saw a wild one take off an arm in one bite before." Randy says.
"Just gotta show the little bitey bastards whose boss." Hector says proudly displaying how he still has all ten of his fingers.

Lucy says nothing and just walks to the nearest mirror to take her clown make up off. Randy and Sparkle sense something amiss.

"You okay?" Sparkle asks.
"Shes's pissed because apparently General Hellstorm was flirting a lot with her hot mom at the end of the night. In fact I'd wager that's how we landed this job in the first place."
"Hector, I'd appreciate it if you didn't call my mom hot. I told you that before. And I'd REALLY appreciate it if you didn't imply my mother was a whore!" Lucy says.
"For fuck's sake Lucy, I didn't say she was! I just meant ol' Hellstorm probably went all soppy when he first saw your mother. She turned on the charm and just reeled in the rube. Shit, we ALL should have such talent when we get to be that age. IF we get to be that age in this shitty world."

"Ever the flatterer I see, Hector. Glad to know that a woman in their forties still has a place in this rotten world." You say stepping into the trailer.

Hector isn't quite sure how to react.

"Um, apologies Ringmistress Suzy."
"Relax, you don't ever have to worry about not being charming Hector, you'll always have your Nibblers to keep you warm. Your father Klepto would've been so proud." You say patting Hector on the head in a condescending manner.

Sparkle and Randy both greet you, but your daughter continues to focus on the mirror.

"Anyway, I'm just making the rounds to everyone and I just wanted to say it was a good show tonight and I'm proud of all of you. In fact we might be coming here to perform again in a few more months. Mr. Hellstorm really enjoyed the show. You'd think a guy that goes by the name General Hellstorm would be all WAR DEATH RAGH! But the guy actually is pretty even tempered, well as far as wasteland warlords go anyway."
"Hey which act did he like the most? Did he like my chainsaw bit?" Sparkle asks enthusiastically.
"Heh, well to be honest he wouldn't stop going on about the freakshow portion. The guy really liked that bit. If there's one good thing about living in a radiated post apocalyptic landscape, it has got this carnival's freakshow up and running again. On the pragmatic side of things we also exchanged some of those weird laser weapons we found. We'd never use the damn things, but Hellstorm seemed to really like the idea of them and thought he could get them working so we've got food and medical supplies for months. I think Dolores is making a count now…"

While you're explaining the upbeat news, you notice that your daughter is still looking into the mirror and scowling the entire time as she finishes taking off her make up.

"Could the rest of you leave for a moment, I have to speak to Lucy." You say. Nobody argues and one by one they exit the trailer leaving you alone with Lucy.

"All right, what are you pissed about this time?" you ask.
"Nothing. Don't you have some guy to go lick your lips at?" Lucy replies.
"Not at the moment no, but I'm glad you continue to have such a high opinion of me."
"Flirting with power mad warlords, great reason to have a high opinion…" Lucy at this point turns to you with anger in her face.
"Goddamn it, Dad hasn't been dead a month and you're already fawning all over some other man! It was bad enough that you did it when he was alive, but can't you even respect the dead?!"
"We've been over this MANY times Lucy. I loved your father and I never once was unfaithful to him, but your father would've actually understood better than anyone. Show must go on Lucy. Besides I'm not actually doing anything with Hellstorm, except a tease and most likely giving him something to dream about. I've always done that to the rubes to get their attention, it's part of being a ringmaster. Even that idiot Hector gets that, don't know why you never did."
"Because it's fucking embarrassing to constantly hear the sexual innuendo about your mother from passing rubes about how they'd like to master YOUR ring."
"Hmm, hadn't heard that one before, sort of an obvious pun when you think about it though…" you remark.
"Stop being so fucking calm about this! I mean…sorry…I just…I mean I KNOW it's all an act, but I just wish you'd tone it down sometimes." Lucy says.
"Believe me, I do. You've never seen me in full-blown seductress mode. Look, I'm a big girl and not doing anything that I'm forced to do. (sigh) I know you're a worldly girl and all, but there's still a small part of you that's a bit naïve. Must be a genetic trait passed down from me."
"Naïve?"
"Yes my wonderfully oblivious darling daughter. You seriously believe that nobody is making comments about you? You walk around in a pink and purple skintight outfit with fishnets stockings blowing luminescent bubbles during your act. How do you know that all those lewd remarks are about me? Half of them are probably about you, but you're so concerned with my actions that you're too blind to see that you're just as much of a tease as I am. You're just unaware of it. Much like I was at your age."

Lucy is suddenly silent at this realization. It's sort of funny how on the mark you actually were with that statement. You and her father both taught her about this bad new world and she isn't unintelligent, but for some reason the girl has never really caught on to what a real knock out she is. Perhaps in some way you did shield her a bit from having to be really subjected to the "curse of beauty" since the carnival is a "safe zone" of sorts.

"Back before the world turned to complete shit I pretty much squandered my natural gifts. Now? I've used them to my fullest advantage, but not just for myself, but for you AND this carnival that we all call a family. You're really lucky Lucy, most people nowadays don't even have a family to look out for them. Shit, even BEFORE the nukes hit, I didn't have such a luxury, so if I have to give a little peck on the cheek to some petty tyrant to help us survive, then so be it. Better that I do it than YOU having to do it."

Lucy doesn't reply, she just looks at you. She knows she wouldn't have the stomach to go through the act that you go through at times. This might be the first time she realizes the sacrifices you've made to make her own life easier.

Lucy nods a few times before speaking.

"Okay, mom. I get it. And I appreciate it."
"Good, that's all I ask. Okay I'm going back to my own trailer now. We're heading out tomorrow morning. Get some rest, you deserve it anyway after the wonderful show you put on."
"I will mom. Thanks." Lucy replies.

As you walk away you see Sparkle, Randy and Hector all slowly sneak back into the trailer.

You enter your own trailer and lay down on the bed thinking about how far you've come in life. It isn't the life you ever expected, but it isn't a bad one all things considering.

Before you fall asleep you look at the old worn clown nose by the nightstand. You grab and squeeze it a couple times, remembering happy times with your now departed husband.

"Goodnight Lance." You say and slowly drift off with the round red foam ball in your hand.