HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: mcregor@s.psych.uiuc.edu (Meloney Cregor)
Subject: Re: Newspaper personals phenomena
Organization: Dept. of Psychology, Univ. of Illinois, Urbana
Date: Thu, 16 Apr 1992 23:06:56 GMT

In article <1992Apr16.191119.27712@spool.cs.wisc.edu> rawdon@cabrales.cs.wisc.edu writes:

>You mean that I just need to put food out on my doorstep and wait a while?

Could be.  When I read this I had visions of a champagne picknick on the
back step.  Could be an interesting approach to meeting folks.  Set it up
and see who shows up. 


Newsgroups: soc.singles,soc.couples,soc.men,soc.women
From: epg@nature.berkeley.edu ()
Newsgroups: soc.singles,soc.couples,soc.men,soc.women
Subject: Older men and younger women (a funny anecdote)
Date: 12 Apr 1992 21:55:16 GMT
Organization: U.C.B.
Distribution: usa
NNTP-Posting-Host: nature.berkeley.edu
Summary: (by the originator of this thread!)

The following post is an honest-to-goodness true account of events
that took place on Sunday 4/12/92.

	*	*	*	*	*	*	*

	I was having breakfast at Andy's Diner with JW this morning.  While we
waited for our banana pancakes, I studied his young-looking face while
he looked at the Chinese Zodiac Signs on the placemat.
	"Hey", he said "I'm a tiger."  I looked at the placemat and looked at
the years under the tiger.  One of them was 1962.
	"You're not a tiger" I said (knowing that JW is 27), "You weren't born
in 1962."
	"Oh, yes I was, uhmm, I'm afraid I lied to you that night.  I
don't know why I did it.  And I kept meaning to tell you, but I thought
you'd get mad.  I guess it was because I wasn't sure how old you were,
and when you asked me my age, you said you thought I was even younger than you. 
I wasn't sure you'd go out with me if you knew I was 29."
	I laughed.  I'd never had a boyfriend lie to me about his age
before.  And having gone out with a man ten years older than JW, I found
it very funny to discover my ex-boyfriend had once thought that I might
drop him for being <too old>.
	"I'm glad you think it's funny" said JW.

(Seen in the light of my recent problems with older men, I found this
absolutely hilarious.) :-) :-) :-)

*Because I was endowed with a mind, heart and soul,
I enjoy everything in life.*

Just me,

little 'e'
Organization: Central Michigan University
Date: Tuesday, 14 Apr 1992 13:44:11 EDT
From: <34EQGRV@CMUVM.CSV.CMICH.EDU>
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Needing not to Need
 <1992Apr6.220105.23689@kakwa.ucs.ualberta.ca> <1250@blue.cis.pitt.edu.UUCP>

HELP
From: johnf@Auspex.COM (John Fereira)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Male visual orientationREFRESH
Date: 14 Apr 92 19:54:01 GMT
Organization: Auspex Systems, Inc.

In article <65417@apple.Apple.COM> stef@Apple.COM (Stef Jones) writes:
 
>"Small and feisty"? Oh Mr. Aahz, what do breasts have to do in
>order to be considered "feisty"? Do you have the Ronco Feisty-Breast 
>Trainer in stock? Does it hurt a lot? And does it double as a 
>floor polisher?
 
The feisty-breast trainer or the feisty breast?

"It's a floor wax."
"It's a dessert topping."
"MMMM. This is good."
"And look at that shine..."

Credit to SNL.
-- 
+=============================================================================+
| John Fereira                Al Bundy for President          
| johnf@auspex.com         "He's as good as the next guy"                     |
+=============================================================================+
From: blowfish@carina.unm.edu (rON.)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Love: It is a precious thing?
Date: 12 Apr 92 11:52:02 GMT
Article-I.D.: lynx.w3vj22b
Organization: University of New Mexico, Albuquerque

In article <1992Apr11.155330.16451@midway.uchicago.edu> pooh@group-w.uchicago.edu (Pooh @ the Utility Muffin Research Kitchen) writes:
>>>If you have two people in a relationship, and one is deeply in love
>>>and happy, and the other one feels less and isn't happy, who has
>>>"won"?
>>The one who feels less and isn't happy.
>So tell me, Mel -- would you rather not have had the relationship
>to begin with?  All relationships end one way or another, so if
>you don't want to end up hurting or being hurt, what's the alternative?
>Would you rather not have any relationships?   What's the REAL point
>of a relationship: to kill or be killed, or to experience, however
>briefly, the feelings of love and companionship?

If you're looking for 'briefly, the feelings of love and companionship', get
a damn dog. if you're looking for a Real (tm) relationship, then brevity,
or the 'thought' of a relationship just ain't it.
I agree with what Mel said above- if you're on the sucker end of a relation-
ship where only one person is interested, then breaking up gets to be twice
as difficult- not only do you have to deal with a breakup, you have to deal
with the fact that the person you >thought< you were having this really
nifty relationship with was just pulling your taffy.
The Real(tm) point of a relationship is to attempt to establish a working
viable co-existance with a MOTAS- one that is mutually beneficial sexually,
emotionally, etc.
Like I was saying above- cheap sex is available at your local bar, and a good
dog (or cat) can provide you your brief feelings of love and compainionship...
r.
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: fredw@mks.com (Fred Walter)
Subject: Re: The "first" "move" (was Re: A R C )
Organization: Mortice Kern Systems Inc., Waterloo, Ontario, CANADA
Date: Mon, 13 Apr 1992 22:33:22 GMT

tlode@isis.cs.du.edu (trygve lode) writes:
>Trygve    (What's a atheist to do?)  

Masterbate ?
-- 
Disclaimer: everything I post is my *personal* opinion and does not represent
or reflect the opinion of the company which employs me.
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: userisra@mts.ucs.ualberta.ca (Mark Israel)
Subject: Re: Needing not to Need
Originator: lnds@krishna.biochem.ualberta.ca
Organization: University of Alberta, Edmonton, Canada
Date: Mon, 6 Apr 1992 22:01:05 GMT

In article <!tnjztr@lynx.unm.edu>, blowfish@carina.unm.edu (rON.) writes:

> Try therapy.
> Actually- sort of seriously, it might be a good idea.

   It might be a bad idea.

   Most therapists have no idea how to treat limerence.  Female patients not
infrequently *become* limerent about male therapists.

> Needing is a part of all humans. We need certain things- food, affection,
> oxygen, etc.

   "I need X" is a dangerous shorthand for "I need X in order to do Y."

   "I need food" is shorthand for "I need food in order to live".  "I need a
pencil" is shorthand for "I need a pencil in order to write."  

   Next time you "need" something, ask yourself what you need it in order to
do.

> When 'needs' become overwhelming- or 'you can't get enough', that is a sign
> that something is not working right.

   "I can't get enough" is ambiguous.  Does it mean "No possible amount could
be enough", or does it mean "No one is currently offering me enough"?

userisra@mts.ucs.ualberta.ca		Mark Israel
Instinctive grammatical moralizer.
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: comptec91065@camins.camosun.bc.ca
Subject: flirtation (harmless?)
Organization: Camosun College
Date: Tue, 14 Apr 1992 19:39:28 GMT

X-NEWS: camins soc.singles: 710
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: rawdon@cabrales.cs.wisc.edu (Michael Rawdon)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Peeking through the curtain
Date: 12 Apr 92 04:01:17 GMT
Article-I.D.: spool.1992Apr12.040117.11892
Reply-To: rawdon@cabrales.cs.wisc.edu
Organization: University of Wisconsin Computer Sciences Dept., Madison, WI

In <65240@apple.Apple.COM> stef@Apple.COM (Stef Jones) writes:
>Afroditi Michailidi writes:
>>    No, no, the *real* problem is when person 1 says "I love you", person 2
>>says "I love you too" and person 1 responds "You're saying that just because I
>>said it first"    :-)

>This is an indicator of type C: person who likes to make things difficult.
>Avoid at all costs unless you are also a type C.

I think that nearly every person I have ever met is a type C...

-- 
Michael Rawdon
rawdon@cabrales.cs.wisc.edu
University of Wisconsin Computer Sciences Department, Madison, WI

Can't let go - there's a madness in my soul tonight.
				- Bryan Ferry, "Can't Let Go"
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: unicorn@world.std.com (unicorn)
Subject: Re: Needing not to Need
Organization: The World @ Software Tool & Die
Date: Tue, 7 Apr 1992 00:51:11 GMT

Larry Margolis <margoli@watson.ibm.com> writes:

>In  <1992Apr6.214424.23207@kakwa.ucs.ualberta.ca>  userisra@mts.ucs.ualberta.ca (Mark Israel) writes:
>>
>>    Are you sure you want to give up the "need"?  Or would you rather have it
>> reciprocated?

>I think getting help for his problem is a lot better than finding someone
>with the same problem.

>Larry Margolis, MARGOLI@YKTVMV (Bitnet), margoli@watson.IBM.com (Internet)

Larry is right. Reciprocated need is unhealthy ( I should know I've tried it
enough times ).  The worse thing that can happen in that circumstance ( which
is what happened this time, sorta ) is that one person gains enough strength 
from the relationship to not need anymore.  Then they slowly ( or not ) back 
away from the needy partner, who holds on, and everything goes south.

However, therapy is not for me. I would never open up to someone who was 
being paid to listen to me. I consider the average physch. to be the 
emotional equivalent to a prostitute ( "I'm all you're as long as you pay
me"). This is not true for therapist for specific traumas ( rape, incest,
child abuse ) because these people are trying to teach people how to deal
with a serious emotional injury.

Art
From: martinc@grover.cs.unc.edu (Charles R. Martin)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: want-sex(women) < want-sex(men)
Date: 14 Apr 92 15:17:20 GMT
Article-I.D.: grover.MARTINC.92Apr14111720
Distribution: soc
Organization: /theta/theta5/unc/martinc/.organization

I just ran into at least one counter-example for Dan and Andrei.  A good
friend of mine in NYC is married, used to be in a three-way live-in
relationship, is an active member of the NYC S&M scene, and just told me
that she is much happier now that she has eliminated her three most
troublesome sexual relationships.

She's having more sex, on purpose, than a man not only would want but
*could possibly have*.

So I still don't buy it.
--
Charles R. Martin/(Charlie)/martinc@cs.unc.edu/(ne crm@cs.duke.edu) 
O/Department of Computer Science/Sitterson Hall/UNC/Chapel Hill, NC 27599
H/3611 University Dr #13M/Durham, NC 27707/(919) 419 1754
The universe is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to
grow sharper.  -- Eden Phillpot, I'm told.  Anyone have a better reference?
From: jjd1@cbnewsg.cb.att.com (james.j.dutton)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: want-sex(women) < want-sex(men)
Date: 15 Apr 92 12:59:45 GMT
Distribution: na
Organization: AT&T

In article <MARTINC.92Apr14111720@grover.cs.unc.edu> martinc@grover.cs.unc.edu (Charles R. Martin) writes:
>I just ran into at least one counter-example for Dan and Andrei.  A good
>friend of mine in NYC is married, used to be in a three-way live-in
>relationship, is an active member of the NYC S&M scene, and just told me
>that she is much happier now that she has eliminated her three most
>troublesome sexual relationships.
>
>She's having more sex, on purpose, than a man not only would want but
>*could possibly have*.
>
>So I still don't buy it.
>--
>Charles R. Martin/(Charlie)/martinc@cs.unc.edu/(ne crm@cs.duke.edu) 

 A friend, yea, uhuh, right, OK, sure.
 
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: unicorn@world.std.com (unicorn)
Subject: Re: Needing not to Need
Organization: The World @ Software Tool & Die
Date: Wed, 8 Apr 1992 03:18:16 GMT

Well, lots of good comments out there.  Some even hepled. 

For those of you who were making assumptions, let me clarify:

1: I do have a network of friends, and they help in lots of ways, but not
   to fulfill this particular need.

2: The cause of the need is known to me: a lousy family life.
   The type of need is known to me: Validation of my worth as a human being.
   Solutions that don't work are known to me:
	Work as validation- One slipped deadline or failure causes panic.
	Friends as validation- Friends don't make a public lifelong commitment
				to you ( however, they do help alot )
	Pets: Animals are unconditional, not critical.

Suggestions to seek therapy are probably good, I just can't talk to someone
who is listening because they are being paid to as opposed to somone who 
actually cares.
 
Strange as it may seems, physical ability helps. Jogging, ultimate frisbee,
basic strength and fitness all seem to help. Why? I don't know. All I can
think of is it is one of the aspects that my family drilled into me that I
was bad at. I guess proving them wrong is that aspect weakens my belief that
any of their negative comments about me were right.

Feeling better now, thanks for the comments.

Art

p.s. I wonder if that's because I lost 5 lbs and ran 1.4 miles this 
	early in the season?
From: margoli@watson.ibm.com (Larry Margolis)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Peeking through the curtain
Date: 6 Apr 92 20:18:18 GMT
Reply-To: margoli@watson.ibm.com
Organization: The Village Waterbed
Disclaimer: This posting represents the poster's views, not necessarily those of IBM

In  <1992Apr5.190009.27945@mks.com>  fredw@mks.com (Fred Walter) writes:
>
> Given the context of this conversation (the 'someone [you] know nothing
> about' being the husband of the woman you want to have sex with), you
> can bet that in the majority of the cases the husband is going to feel
> the way you seem to have difficulty imagining he might. In this society
> monogamy is still considered the norm in a marriage, and people get
> upset when their partner screws around on them.

If you're saying that the majority of husbands would be upset if their
wife had an affair, I would agree with you.  If you're saying that
the majority of husbands *whose wife tells her lover that the husband
knows about and approves of the affair* would be upset about the affair,
then I'd tend to disagree.

Larry Margolis, MARGOLI@YKTVMV (Bitnet), margoli@watson.IBM.com (Internet)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: mcregor@s.psych.uiuc.edu (Meloney Cregor)
Subject: Re: Male visual orientationREFRESH
Organization: Dept. of Psychology, Univ. of Illinois, Urbana
Date: Tue, 14 Apr 1992 14:21:21 GMT

In article <6rxjc7l.aahz@netcom.com> aahz@netcom.com (Aahzmandius) writes:
>>"Have you seen Mr. Aahz?"
>>" Yes, he's over in small and perky."
>
>Ex*cuse* me?  I'd be over in "small and feisty", thank you very much.

Feisty?   They come in feisty?
Hmmm.  I guess mine *are* well behaved.
From: dhardin@bbn.com (Dawn Hardin)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: want-sex(women) < want-sex(men)
Date: 15 Apr 1992 18:51:08 GMT
Organization: Bolt Beranek and Newman Inc., Cambridge MA
Reply-To: dhardin@spcink.bbn.com (Dawn Hardin)
NNTP-Posting-Host: bbn.com

In article <1992Apr15.184422.10973@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> tlode@isis.cs.du.edu (trygve lode) writes:
>
>You know, I've been in a fairly lusty mood lately myself--I may just go
>get a few more data points myself.


ANALYZE ME, ANALYZE ME, you brute.
From: aahz@netcom.com (Aahzmandius)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: The Second Move
Date: 17 Apr 92 13:28:33 GMT
Organization: Bill 'n' Opus for Prez

In article <65578@apple.Apple.COM> stef@Apple.COM (Stef Jones) writes:
>tlode@isis.cs.du.edu (trygve lode) writes:
>
>>I think the important thing to remember is that Angelwing isn't all women;
>>she's not responsible for behaving in a manner that you might think would
>>be ideal for all women to behave in.
>
>Well said. The point is this: if a guy wants to date someone like 
>Angelwing, he is more likely to be successful if he pays attention to 
>how she likes to be approached (and she has made this pretty easy to 
>comprehend by discussing her preferences in detail over the net). 
>If a guy wants not to be bothered with this stuff, then he can get to 
>know women like Teri who ask guys out more directly. His choice. Both 
>kinds of women exist.

Yeah, but how do we figger out which one is which?
-- 
                         --- Aahz (the *other* Dan Bernstein)
                             @netcom.com 

Hugs and backrubs -- I break Rule 6

Why is this newsgroup different from all other newsgroups?
From: grund@pyrite.SOM.CWRU.edu (Victor Grund)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: The "first" "move" (was Re: A R C )
Date: 14 Apr 92 08:29:02 GMT
Article-I.D.: pyrite.GRUND.92Apr14032902
	<1992Apr7.212354.25236@bronze.ucs.indiana.edu>
	<1992Apr8.004330.19767@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu>
	<1992Apr8.133350.27832@dgbt.doc.ca>
Organization: International Business Machines, Cleveland, Ohio, USA


In article <1992Apr8.133350.27832@dgbt.doc.ca> michele@dgbt.doc.ca (Michele Guillet) writes:

   That doesn't surprise me, 99 % of the time, men that either ask me for
   my phone number or said they called, don't call either. I think
   a number of people seem to think that asking for a phone number 
   (or saying they'll call you ) is a polite way to close a conversation 
   and say good bye.

   I call a few of these men (as a rule I trade phone numbers) and
   quite often they didn't even bother to return my calls (I got their machine
   and left a message).


I've had this experience a few times myself with women.  One very
recently, in fact.  I called this woman and she sounded as if she
didn't know what to do with me.  This was confusing because I know I
got a sincere invitation at the time; she asked me to call, I didn't
drag her number out of her.

Sometimes I get the impression that the challenge is to get the other
person to call.  This is a very sad way to do business.  I very rarely
never call a person with whom I've taken the trouble of exchanging
telephone numbers.  I always make a strong effort return messages,
too.  Anything else would be very rude.  Where is the risk?  Nobody is
seeking a permanent engagement with that first telephone call.

Victor
--
Victor D. Grund 		 | grund@pyrite.som.cwru.edu [129.22.48.4]
IBM Cleveland                    | uunet!cwjcc!pyrite!grund
As always, if I should be caught | disavow any knowledge of my actions.
or killed, the secretary will    | (and so will IBM)
From: intrigue@milton.u.washington.edu (Angelwing)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Spring Fever or what?
Date: 15 Apr 92 17:21:37 GMT
Article-I.D.: u.1992Apr15.172137.4440
Organization: University of Washington, Seattle

In article <1992Apr15.131630.19388@crash.cts.com> rcf@pnet01.cts.com (Bob Forsythe) writes:
>intrigue@milton.u.washington.edu (Angelwing) writes:
>>
>>Don't you *dare* giggle at me you dweeb!  Ever heard of retrospectives? 
>>HUH?  Or re-runs?!?!  Sheesh.  Good lord ...a grown man on *purpose*
>>typing "*GIGGLE*"  To borrow a phrase ....  It is to hurl.
>>
>     Yeah.  God forbid we should manage to destroy any of your stereotypes
>about what a "real man" is.

Nice of you to worry, Bob, but rest assured my stereotypes are firmly
planted.  It is not that I don't believe that "real men" don't giggle, act
coy, or anything else that is not considered typically "manly".  It is the
double-asterisk-CAPS - I hear yelling when I read that.  Lack of subtlety,
definitely.

So I over reacted.  So kill me.

Angelwing - c/o The James Gang

*------------------------------------------------------------------*
* Angelwing       |"Two things are wanted by a true man, danger and*
* U. of Washington| play - therefore, he seeks woman as the most   *
*                 | dangerous toy."       Friedrich Nietzsche      *
*------------------------------------------------------------------*
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: The Eternal Fool <GCTHORNE@idbsu.idbsu.edu>
Subject:      Fools Rush In
To: soc.singles.usenet
Reply-To: GCTHORNE@idbsu.idbsu.edu
Organization: DEC Palo Alto
Date:         Thu, 09 Apr 92 09:53:12 MST


         Fools rush in
               where Moscony fears to go
         But Moscony never falls in love
               so how is *he* to know?

         When I left
               I felt my life begin
         So open up your garters and let
               This fool rush in


         hey, so I'm in a nutty mood.

         Angelwing sez  " pooh on Broward "

         Sounds cool, but let's ask Pooh about it first.
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: jonb@
Subject: Re: sense of humour (was Re: define attractiveness, i dare ya)
Organization: University of New South Wales
Date: Thu, 9 Apr 1992 09:09:03 GMT

In article <1992Mar30.204412.13507@ait.com> eleanor@ait.com (Eleanor Evans) writes:
>Angelwing, my hero!  I, too, found Ishtar hysterical.  I thought I
>was alone <sob>, but then, along came Jones, oops, wrong song--I mean
>Angelwing...

And I thought *I* was the only one on this planet who appreciated the humor 
in ISHTAR...  Good to find someone else with a sense of humor...

Jon
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: kiran@bronze.ucs.indiana.edu (Kiran Wagle)
Subject: Re: Hooters
Organization: Indiana University
Date: Tue, 14 Apr 92 08:02:41 GMT

>johnf@Auspex.COM (John Fereira) writes:
>> It's not really a class.  It was a BOF (Birds of a Feather), sort of a
>> Special Interest Group.  Tremendous Hooters need to be managed when they
>> get out of hand.
What is Birds of a Feather? (t'was a good episode of _the Avengers_...)

margoli@watson.ibm.com (Larry Margolis) writes:
>If they're really tremendous, it seems that they wouldn't *fit* in a hand
>to begin with, no?

It only seems that way if you equate 'tremendous' with 'large'.
-- 
"The truffle is not an outright aphrodisiac, but it may in certain
 circumstances make women more affectionate and men more amiable."
                                                ...Brillat-Savarin
From: pooh@group-w.uchicago.edu (Pooh @ the Utility Muffin Research Kitchen)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Request : Dating advice from women
Date: 14 Apr 92 18:58:54 GMT
Organization: Medieval England, Iowa

In article <p0xjklb.barry@netcom.com> barry@netcom.com (Kenn Barry) writes:
>>Why the term "hitting"?  I'd call it "dating".
>
>	No, a date is what you do after you've hit on someone successfully.
>
>	The reason you meet lots of men at parties is that the men
>are hitting on you.
>
>	Ah, women: I love 'em, but sometimes they don't have a clue :-).

Fiddle-dee-dee, Kenn -- I meet LOTS of guys at parties who aren't
interested in me, therefore they can't be hitting on me.  (and no,
I'm not always hitting on them, either.)

Men: I love 'em, but just because they have a hammer they think everything
   is a nail ... ;-)

Pooh
      pooh@group-w.uchicago.edu
From: reykja@hpfcso.FC.HP.COM (Reykja Sigurdsson)
Date: Mon, 6 Apr 1992 07:19:33 GMT
Subject: icelandic dating customs
Organization: Hewlett-Packard, Fort Collins, CO, USA
Newsgroups: soc.singles

 Anyone out there have some advice on how to snag an Icelandic man? Love 'em
to death but I don't have the vaguest notion of the appropriate customs?

                h*e*l*p!!!
From: johnf@Auspex.COM (John Fereira)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Male visual orientationREFRESH
Date: 10 Apr 92 21:30:24 GMT
Organization: Auspex Systems, Inc.

In article <1992Apr10.170301.12078@u.washington.edu> gwangung@byron.u.washington.edu (Roger Tang) writes:
 
|	Hmmm....betcha Angelwing would seem more manageable if you thought
|of her as, say, a ST: TNG character (imagine her as a Counselor)(she'd
|be MUCH better than Commander Cleavage....)

Of course she would.  She just told us she has tremendous hooters.  Since
I recently attended a "Tremendous Hooter Management" BOF I'm no longer
timorous when I meet someone like Angelwing.

-- 
+=============================================================================+
| John Fereira                Al Bundy for President          
| johnf@auspex.com         "He's as good as the next guy"                     |
+=============================================================================+
Newsgroups: soc.singles,soc.couples,soc.men,soc.women