HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: bpb9204@tamsun.tamu.edu (Brent)
Subject: Re: The End Of The World
Keywords: baptist, apocalypse
Organization: Texas A&M Univ., Inc.
Distribution: alt
Date: Wed, 14 Oct 1992 20:49:57 GMT

ipgrier@compass.uwaterloo.ca (Iain P. Grier) writes:
|
|It appears that Baptists and some other miscellaneous religion 
|(United Church?) believe that the end of the world is supposed to
|happen on October 28th, 1992.

I bought a copy of the "Student Edition" of MATLAB for my mac the other
day, and last night I was running through some of the demos.  One of
the demos took population information for the past few decades and 
then tried to use a polynomial to predict the future population of
the US.  

For those of you who don't know, using a polynomial to approximate
some data you have is fairly accurate within the range of the data,
but it's very inaccurate outside the range.  So, the population data
was through 1990, and right outside 1990 the graph dived to zero.
The demo went on to calculate where the function was zero, and it
came out to be Sept 21, 1991.  So right now, we don't exist.

The United Church is a pretty good example of a cult.

|Is the apocalypse story an UL or is the story that it's a Baptist
|story an UL?

Every few years some people don their wighats and prance around
like the end of the world is happening.  When they sober up they 
just go back to work the next morning.  

|It looks like we have less than 2 weeks to debunk this thing...

Why the hell would you want to debunk it?  Man, the thing I want
to do is REINFORCE it to really scare the shit out of the suckers
stupid enough to believe it...

|I also heard that only the good Baptists/misc. will be allowed to
|ascend into Heaven on this day, and all the pagans will remain on
|Earth until the actual destruction of the world in the year 1999 or
|something.
|  I guess that over the next 8 years we'll all be able
|to fuck like bunnies or whatever sinful activity gives you a rise,
|since we're going to Hell anyways.

Come the apocolypse, I want to see the FOUR HORSEMEN and get their
AUTOGRAPHS.

Which reminds me, the local programming contest was last weekend and
my team didn't have a name.  The name I wanted was
"Death, War, Famine, hold the Pestilence" but one of the others
was adamantly against it for one reason or another.

-Brent
p.s. 1999 is the year the Overmen take the good folks back to Planet X.

-- 
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Brent P. Burton, N5VMG                          Department of Computer Science
bpb9204@tamsun.tamu.edu                                   Texas A&M University
      What are typical family values?      Good buys at WalMart.
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
From: datri@egsner.cirr.com (Anthony Datri)
Subject: Re: Feets too big
Organization: Central Iowa (Model) Railroad, Dallas, Tx.
Date: Tue, 13 Oct 1992 03:39:46 GMT

>The way I heard it, if you wear shoes that are too big for you, your feet
>will *grow and spread to fill your shoes,* thus increasing your shoe size
>*permanently* to the over-large size you were so carelessly wearing.

The way I read it, one's feet will often spread out somewhat when shoes
aren't worn for a while.  The idea is that the typical modern shoe is
tight enough that it prevents the "natural" conformation of the foot.

>  This
>is more important to women, I expect, since we think of dainty feet as
>something to be proud of.

Women's feet definitely tend -- or are thought to tend by shoemakers --
to be narrower than men's.

>(I should go bck to foot-binding...)

I've seen pictures of that.  I'd always heard that the practice was
to keep the foot uniformly small.  I've read that it often actually
was done to *bend* the instep and heel toward each other so that the
toes and heel would be adjacent.  Strange but true.
From: cromar@math.rutgers.edu (Scott Cromar)
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
Subject: Re: Q: Eating live monkey brains
Date: 16 Oct 92 21:31:48 GMT
Organization: Rutgers Univ., New Brunswick, N.J.

mick@isi.edu (Mick O'Donnell) writes:

Monkey (though not live monkey) is something of a delicacy in the
Peten region of Guatemala.  I don't know if the brains are eaten or
not, but I can't think of any reason why they wouldn't be eaten like
the rest of the monkey.

In fact, in Flores, Peten, there is a restaurant that caters mostly to
tourists.  They serve just about any kind of exotic meat you can name
(one of the owners is an avid hunter).  I imagine that they'd serve
you monkey brains if you asked for them.  I don't recall the name of
the restaurant (it's been several years since I lived there, and the
place was somewhat out of my price range).  And there are several
shops that specialize in alligator-skin shoes (not in my size,
though--my feet are too big).  

--Scott "funny thing--all the meat tastes like chicken" Cromar
From: klcox@hal.gnu.ai.mit.edu (Kris L. Cox)
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
Subject: Outrageous non-900 number bills
Summary: Is this true?
Keywords: Myth, Truth
Date: 14 Oct 92 14:58:48 GMT
Followup-To: alt.folklore.urban
Distribution: us
Organization: Who's organized?


  I heard from a friend (not FOAF, just F) that certain companies have entered 
into agreements with telephone companies so that when I (or any other 
unsuspecting rube) call 1-713-555-3232 (or whatever the number might be), I 
will be billed an exorbitant amount of money for that call.  The funds in
excess of the actual telephone company's charges, of course, go to the 
company to which the phone number is assigned.
  Now, for 900 numbers, all ads are required to state exactly how much the
rate is, and all the charges associated with the call are required to be
stated in advance of the call.  As a result, I tend to believe that this 
story I've been told is mere myth, speculation, or paranoia.  Any ideas?
-- 
Kris L. Cox                             GE Aircraft Engines - Systems Analyst
                       GE doesn't even know what I say, let alone endorse it.
My boss is a Jewish carpenter.                           klcox@gnu.ai.mit.edu
From: mprc@troi.cc.rochester.edu (M. Price)
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
Subject: Re: nail in Coca-Cola
Date: 7 Oct 92 20:36:25 GMT
Distribution: usa
Organization: University of Rochester - Rochester, New York


     No no, it was a pubic hair.

                                                                MP
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban,alt.folklore.science
From: fehr@ms.uky.edu (Jeff Davis)
Subject: Re: Metrication and "normal usage"
Date: Tue, 13 Oct 1992 14:33:17 GMT
Organization: Austerlitz, Gershovitz, and Carmichael

Steve Green writes:
>Seanna Watson writes:
>>Cyndi Cuppernell writes:
>> >
>> >But here's one I have wondered about for years now.  I have heard
>> >nurses refer to a centimeter as a "SONtimeter", when talking. 
>> >                 
>> I also have heard my Dr. use "SONtimetre", and wondered about it.
>> This is similar to how it is pronounced in French, and there are a
>> lot of Francophones in the Ottawa area, but my Dr. is not French
>> himself, and I have never heard anyone else pronounce it this way.
>>
>That's weird.  My mother is a nurse (in Ottawa BTW) and she pronounces
>it the same way.  She's just about the only one I've ever heard say it
>that way.  And I thought it was just a Newfoundland upbringing.
>
I first heard that during our Lamaze training...how once the woman was
x sonnimeters dilated then she should do something-or-other. I had
no idea what a sonnimeter was and since at the time I felt abashed
about my ignorance, I kept my mouth shut. Since then, I've discovered
a.f.u. and no longer hold back due to complete ignorance. [You could
use that as a testimonial the next time you out selling a.f.u
door-to-door.]

-- 
Jeff Davis <davis@keats.ca.uky.edu> No one -- from sea to shining sea -- 
can tell us why we are having all this trouble with our Republic.
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
From: billmcc@seanews.akita.com (Bill McCormick)
Subject: Re: Cows
Organization: SEANEWS - Seattle Public Access News & Mail
Date: Fri, 16 Oct 1992 12:52:46 GMT

In article <nking.719141381@unix1.tcd.ie> nking@unix1.tcd.ie (Nev's family recipe) writes:
>Not only that, but the fasteners used in all farm gates and fences must
>now be round headed rivets instead of hexagonal bolts.  This is because
>of a genetic trait inbred to cows from fear of bolt guns used in
>abbatoirs.  Wierd or what??...

I don't think so.  The trait of fear of hexagonal things would only
be bred into cattle if it improved their chances of survival.  Unfortunately
for the cow, once it sees the bolt gun it's too late.  There's not any
chance of passing on its genes.

I suspect that the reason the fasters are round is because that way
cattle don't learn aversion to hexagonal things and hence become more
difficult to slaughter.

Of course the entire idea may be B.S.  I grew up on a cattle farm and
have never heard of such a thing.  Ask me about "summer sausage" though
and we'll talk.

Bill
-- 
SEANEWS  []  Seattle News + Mail  []  Public Access  []  +1 206 937 9529
E-mail for PGP key.   MD5 (no sigs) is: 8e253e95133365a292261c7d0da58bcb
From: tjc50@juts.ccc.amdahl.com (Terry Carroll)
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
Subject: Re: Error in FAQ: Gerbils
Date: 14 Oct 92 22:34:09 GMT
Reply-To: tjc50@juts.ccc.amdahl.com (Terry Carroll)
Organization: Amdahl Corporation

In article <26806@dog.ee.lbl.gov>, twcaps@tennyson.lbl.gov (Terry Chan) 
writes:
> adamsd@crash.cts.com (Adams Douglas) writes:
> 
>   +Referencing the FAQ:
>   + 
>   +>T. Gerbils are illegal in California. [CA Regs. Title 14, Sec. 260 
> (b)(10)(A)].
>   + 
>   +My roommate, a law librarian, says there is no such reference under
>   +Title 14, Sec. 260 (which deals with hunting large game animals). She
>   +has also looked through the rest of Title 14 and can find no
>   +reference under any section likely to deal with gerbils, animals or
>   +rodents. She asks that such citations be double-checked before being
>   +posted.
>   + 
>   +Anybody have the correct citation, or better, the quote from the
>   +relevant text?
> 
> In looking over the original posting by one of our a.f.u. legal-types,
> I think that the conclusion line of the post (on which the above 
> reference is based) is not correct.  In the body of the original post, 
> I believe that the correct reference should be as above but to Section 
> 671, not 260.
> 
> Want to double-check that Terry?

The correct regulation is Title 14, Section 671 (c) (2) (J) 1.  I think the 
subsections were recently renumbered since subsection (b) now contains a 
reference to a Dept of Fish & Game manual no. 671, dated 2/25/92.  

Terry Carroll - tjc50@juts.ccc.amdahl.com - 408/992-2152
The opinions presented above are not necessarily those of a sound mind.
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
From: rogers@rosencrantz.osf.org (Andrew Rogers)
Subject: Re: aluminum siding
Organization: HICAM/OSD
Date: Tue, 13 Oct 1992 18:08:57 GMT

In article <1687FBD9F.DSTEPHEN@cmsa.gmr.com> DSTEPHEN@cmsa.gmr.com writes:
><stories about enterprising citizens ripping aluminum siding off houses
>and selling it to scrap metal dealers omitted>
>
>I don't know about other cities, but this certainly happens in Detroit...

There was an article in the Boston Globe just a few days ago about copper
gutters and drainpipes being stolen from Beacon Hill townhouses.  I also
remember a rash of slate roof thefts in Vermont a few years back.

Andrew Rogers
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
Subject: Re: Women in groups
From: derek@nezsdc.icl.co.nz (Derek Tearne)
Date: Thu, 15 Oct 92 21:07:37 GMT
Organization: Fujitsu New Zealand

In article <1687FC0CA.DSTEPHEN@cmsa.gmr.com> DSTEPHEN@cmsa.gmr.com writes:
>In article <Bw1Az1.LGC@news.cso.uiuc.edu>
>catstyle@deja-vu.aiss.uiuc.edu (Jason R. Heimbaugh) writes:
>>
>>While we're on the subject of "vaginal secretions" is there an "official"
>>medical term for them?
>
>Look up "smegma" in your local dictionary.  It refers to a lot of unpleasant
>material that collects in the antipodean parts of the body.
                               ^^^^^^^^^^

Hey, exactly what are you implying here?


ObUL: The word Podes isn't in the dictionary.

Derek "An impossible posting from the antipodes" Tearne


-- 
Derek Tearne. -- derek@nezsdc.icl.co.nz --  Fujitsu/ICL New Zealand -- 
Some of the more aware dinosaurs were worried about the environmental
consequences of an accident with the new Iridium enriched fusion reactor.  
"If it goes off only the cockroaches and mammals will survive..." they said.
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
From: wisp@dcs.warwick.ac.uk (Wisp)
Subject: Re: Male Pregnancies
Organization: Department of Computer Science, Warwick University, England
Date: Thu, 15 Oct 1992 08:48:30 GMT

In article <TRIF.92Oct14052222@bike.rad.washington.edu> trif@bike.rad.washington.edu (To Run In Fear) writes:
>In article <39368@sdcc12.ucsd.edu> pashley@sdcc13.ucsd.edu (Montykins) writes:
>   In article <1992Oct12.015811.27682@pasteur.Berkeley.EDU>, peterm@cory.Berkeley.EDU (Peter Mardahl) writes:
>   >
>   >The story goes that some guy thought it would be neat to bear
>   >a child.  Some <unknown> hospital obligingly surgically implanted
>   >a fertilized egg somewhere in his abdomen, and later delivered
>   >the fetus by "Caesarian".
>   >
>
>   Oh, just for laughs, I'll give this one a try. No womb. No umbilical
>   cord. No way to get nourishment to the child. No place for the li'l
>   tyke to _be_. Just gonna sit there blocking off the small intestine?
>
>   It takes a little bit more than just a fertilized egg to form a
>   baby. Think "Biology".
>
>    -Paul "Monty" Ashley
>
>Think again.  Though rare, women have had abdomenal pregnancies before,
>and carried to term.
>
>The biggest obstacle is that no one knows if men have the right immune
>apparatus to short circuit the normal immune response that would attack
>the fetus.

Nope. It's all fetal tissue, which is immunologically neutral to the species.
There are many precedents for this, in animal experiments and more recently in
clinical trials involving the implantation of fetal substantia nigra as a
treatment for Parkinson's disease. This last was generally successful, in both
men and women, and simply involved injecting the cells into the bloodstream
and letting them find their own way (OK, it's not simple, but you get the
idea...). No use of immunosuppressants involved.

Incidentally, these trials are forming a large weapon for the anti-abortion
wienies, on the grounds that *loads* of women will go out and get pregnant for
the express purpose of donating the embryos/fetuses to medical science...

Later,

The Wisp. [where's the fetal brown fat, I want to know...]
From: joslin_paul@ae.ge.com
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
Subject: Sherlock Holmes (was Re: Sexual euphemism in the FAQ)
Date: 15 Oct 92 11:58:15 GMT
Reply-To: joslin_paul@ae.ge.com
Distribution: na
Organization: GE Aircraft Engines
Originator: root@c0228.ae.ge.com

pv@gagme.chi.il.us (Paul Vader) writes:

>"Sign of the Six-legged Aardvark"? Isn't that a Sherlock Holmes story? PV

Speaking of Sherlock Holmes, which novel was the first to have Dr Watson
say, "No shit, Sherlock."?

ObUL:  221 Baker Street does not exist, but it's in the dictionary right
next to "gullible".

Paul "Does anyone know any amusing Watson stories?" Joslin
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
From: msb@sq.sq.com (Mark Brader)
Subject: Re: Is that a boom mike in Madonna's butt?
Organization: SoftQuad Inc., Toronto, Canada
Date: Wed, 14 Oct 92 23:10:52 GMT

> > # Casablanca
> > -12 minutes into the film, it is mentioned that the stolen
> > Letters of Transit are signed by General DeGaulle, and cannot
> > be questioned. ... (This is contentious; did Peter Lorre say
> > "DeGaulle", "Weygand", or a mix of the two?).
> 
> Using DeGaulle's name was not a "mistake", but a deliberate choice
> because his name was recognizable to American audiences.

That's an interesting remark, since the name spoken in the film is
definitely not "de Gaulle" (nor "DeGaulle" either).

I have taped the movie and listened to the line several times.
Lorre slurs it a bit, so that it's easy to *mishear* as "de Gaulle"
if that's the only French name you know what sounds like that, and
so that I can't positively say that it's really "Weygand".  But if
we take for granted that it's one of the two, then "Weygand" it is.

Note that the "Weygand" sounds something like "vay GON", while "de
Gaulle" sounds like "duh GOLE" but in English might become "duh GOL";
thus in slurred pronunciation they are quite similar-sounding.

The other criticisms of the premise do make sense to me, though!
-- 
Mark Brader, SoftQuad Inc., Toronto	"... pure English is de rigueur"
utzoo!sq!msb, msb@sq.com			-- Manchester Guardian Weekly

This article is in the public domain.
From: snopes%club33@stlth.enet.dec.com (snopes)
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
Subject: Re: "Gang Bang" series
Date: 7 Oct 92 07:48:39 GMT
Organization: Will work for food, but not for DEC.



+-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+
|   SAR 19.604-12, RESTRICTION ON DISCLOSURE AND USE OF POSTING (SNP 1992)    |
|                                                                             |
|  This posting contains data that shall not be disclosed outside this site   |
|  and shall not be duplicated, used, or disclosed for any purpose other than |
|  to evaluate this posting.                                                  |
|                                                                             |
|   + David Mikkelson  Digital Equipment Corporation, Culver City, CA  USA +  |
+-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+

In article <5OCT199210451715@jane.uh.edu>, 
  vpaf5@jane.uh.edu (Kal) writes...

>I don't know about the rest of the country, but if this happened here in
>Houston, you'd have lawyers parachuting into her back yard in order to
>take this case, at no expense to her, and for a mere 30% of what she'd
>get in a civil suit.

Continuing this hypothetical thread, lawyers can only get money where there's
money to be gotten.  Purveyors of home-made porn aren't necessarily rolling in
dough.  It could end up costing far more to pursue a civil suit than could ever
be recovered in damages, and that's not the sort of case lawyers stand in line
to handle.

- snopes
From: dternes@duke.cdc.com (David Ternes)
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
Subject: Re: Oct. 28: The Rapture (pamphlet found in Chicago)
Date: 13 Oct 92 15:33:40 GMT
Reply-To: dternes@mips.COM (David Ternes)
Organization: Advanced Product Development

In article <1992Oct13.011753.22412@midway.uchicago.edu> djb6@midway.uchicago.edu writes:
>A pamphlet found on the Midway Plaisance (a street near the U. of Chicago),
>having been thrown out the window of a van painted with Scriptural slogans:
>
>RAPTURE- OCTOBER 28, 1992
>WHAT TO DO IN CASE YOU MISS THE RAPTURE
>
>* Stay calm and do not panic

I read a small article about October 28, 1992, being the date of rapture
as chosen by some Korean 'prophet'.  The article went on to say that his
following has grown large enough to be causing concern among officials in
South Korea.  People have been quitting jobs and selling everything they
have and the like.

Does anyone know who this man is and what caused him to pick October 28th
as the day of Rapture?

I guess I'll just have to be prepared since the Harmonic Convergence did
cause the Berlin Wall to tumble and the Soviet Union to collapse.

E. David Ternes                                       dternes@udev.cdc.com
          Goal: To live either in obscurity or in competance.
From: billn@hpcvaac.cv.hp.com (bill nelson)
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
Subject: Re: More Stupid Lawyer Tricks
Date: 9 Oct 92 21:46:43 GMT
Organization: Hewlett-Packard Company, Corvallis, Oregon USA

cromar@math.rutgers.edu (Scott Cromar) writes:
: 
: While driving over from the other campus, I heard a story on the radio
: news that reinforces my belief that people will sue for anything.
: According to the story, a fellow is suing the police department for
: injuries sustained as a result of a high-speed chase with a police
: officer.  The police officer says that he tried to get the guy to pull
: over when he observed him weaving in traffic at a high rate of speed
: (speeds exceeding 100mph).  The cop says that he never tried to give
: chase to our hero, but rather that he followed him at the speed limit
: while keeping him in sight in order to radio ahead.  Since our hero was
: driving drunk (he pled guilty to speeding and drunk driving), he
: was unable to keep control and crashed in a most spectacular fashion
: which ended in his losing part of one leg.
: 
: Of course, the case will likely be thrown out.  After all the lawyers
: involved have collected a hefty fee.

If he has a lawyer representing him, that could be taken care of by
fining the lawyer for filing a frivolous lawsuit. If not, then that
charge should be made against the person filing the suit.

Bill
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
Subject: Re: Yeast
From: dignan@husc10.harvard.edu (Thomas Dignan)
Date: 14 Oct 92 04:41:06 GMT

mcirvin@husc8.harvard.edu (Mcirvin) writes:

>dignan@husc10.harvard.edu (Thomas Dignan) writes:

>> 	Can one use yeast from a vaginal yeast infection to raise bread 
>>or to ferment beer? It was recently suggested to me that there is a 
>>distinct marketing possiblity behind products made this way.

>Tom, ever since the wildebeest incident, I thought you'd learned not to
>leave yourself logged in.

>-- 
>Matt McIrvin, posting nonsense again 


	Actually Matt I'm rather excited because I got a hold of some of
Chaki's yeast. It actually smells quite sweet.




-- 
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Thomas Dignan                          |   I am not a chutney ferret.
Knight@Templar.haywain.cab             |   "This song rhymes and we 
Master@Priory.sion.cab                 |      play it in time." - Flipper
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
From: pynq@quads.uchicago.edu (George Jetson)
Subject: Re: Post the FAQ (was Dead pet UL?)
Reply-To: pynq@midway.uchicago.edu
Organization: D. J. Dougherty & Associates
Date: Sat, 10 Oct 1992 18:56:00 GMT

In article <1992Oct8.161308.6181@unislc.uucp> dw@unislc.uucp (Dan Wright) writes:
>
>In my humble opinion you should post the FAQ, even if it hasn't changed
>since last time.  Now's when it's needed most.  And you might use a
>glaringly obvious subject line such as "Here's the FAQ! <-----READ".
>
>As a young upstart, before I had grown an asbestos shell, I remember being
>stung by reprimands to some of my (freshman-like) initial postings.  I

An observation about human nature: If you want people to shut up, you
must make them feel stupid, without explicitly insulting them.  If you
do the later, all you do is obligate them to "defend" themselves.  Of course,
in so doing (defending themselves), they accomplish two goals:

	1) Convince themselves that they have been vindicated.
	2) End up looking even stupider.

This, of course, makes for a positive feedback loop.
-----------------
So, here's the thing.  If you want discipline, do what they do in, e.g.,
comp.lang.c.  Whenever you post anything that is even remotely related
to anything that's in the FAQ, what you get is about 2 weeks of abusive
email, none of which insults you personally - that would be too
obvious, and would lead to the problem described above.  Rather, the
treatment, which is basically handed out by an enforcement squad
(I assume they must hold weekly strategy sessions), is designed to
subtlely make you feel like an 18yr old who just got off the bus.
Nothing ever shows up in the newgroup.  Its kind of like being shunned;
it is as if your posting never existed.

It's very effective.  We should implement it here.
-----------------

(I don't need any smileys here, do I?)

************************************************************************
A note to new readers:  the weasely :-) symbol is frowned upon in this
group.  Any questions, see Phil Gustafson who will gladly rearrange your
diodes for you.
			- From the AFU FAQ -

	- pynq@quads.uchicago.edu, who is still costing the net
	  hundreds, if not thousands, of dollars, every time he posts -
************************************************************************