Newsgroups: bit.listserv.christia
Date:         Wed, 8 Apr 1992 13:09:04 PDT
From:         Doug Gould <5315P@NAVPGS.BITNET>
Subject:      Becky and Mormonism

Dear Becky, my heart goes out to you for what you wrote on

>Date:         Fri, 27 Mar 1992 18:03:49 MST
>From:         Becky Harris <ISPBJH@ASUACAD.BITNET>
>Subject:      Re: Mormonism (attn Doug)

[ . . . ]

>. . . I believed the Mormon church was true at one time myself.
>I believed Joseph Smith was a prophet, and I never dreamed of leaving.

I'm truly saddened by your expression of former faith in the Church, and
Joseph, the Prophet.  They're very dear to my heart.  And I can imagine
they were to you, too, at one time.  Like you, I would feel a great loss if
I reached the conclusion you have, to renounce them.

>. . . When I started reading things
>on this list from Nuzz, I decided that I would find the books he quoted
>from somehow, and read all that I could, because the things he posted
>were offensive to me. . . .

May I ask: was Nuzz the beginning of your "rude awakening" to some of the
mysteries and more difficult doctrines of the Gospel?  I just find it very
disheartening to think that his influence was the beginning of your falling
away.  I believe I understand your motivation to search into the roots of
the controversies he must have presented, for the sake of your children.  I
admire you for that determination, really--trying to be sure that what you
taught them was truth, and unshakable faith in the Lord, Jesus Christ.

>. . . Some of the things that I had
>learned that I did not believe like polygamy, men becoming Gods, they
>would eventually hear, just as I had.  I knew I would have to stand on
>one side or the other with these issues.  I knew eventually they would
>ask me and I wanted to be honest. . . .

I think you were right to want to get to the bottom, so to speak, of these
doctrines in order to not confuse your children.  It's a shame you weren't
more carefully taught, yourself, growing up in the Church, so you would be
prepared with the faith and understanding to know how to deal with them.
You see, in all humility, I don't have a difficult time accepting polygamy,
nor what I consider to be a glorious concept that all sons and daughters of
our Heavenly Father may progress eternally until we receive our crown of
glory and become gods, even as He has done.

>. . . It was very painful
>to find that I hadn't been told the whole story.  It was also painful to
>find that I wasn't a Mormon anymore.

I can sense your pain, still, and I share in your loss because it seems to
me you weren't properly taught as you were growing up.  By properly taught
I'm referring to my belief that we learn line upon line, precept upon
precept, including faith and experiencing the Love of Christ for us.
Somewhere along the way it seems someone (or perhaps several someones)
dropped the ball.

>I tried to be objective about my doubts, so I went to the stake president
>and put my questions to him.  I hadn't thought to leave the church yet.
>. . . he ended up saying that
>answers to my questions had not been revealed, and that it really wasn't
>something I should be upset over.  All of his responses were in reference
>to my question of whether men could be gods, and whether our Heavenly
>Father was inferior to His own God. . . .

From your description, it seems to me your stake president didn't spend
enough time listening and teaching, nor did he show you enough love or
spiritual discernment in order to sense how deeply disturbed you must have
been.  I am truly saddened by this realization.

>My search is not over.  I have found it lonely and difficult to leave the
>church.  My family has shown their disappointment in me, and this is hard
>to accept.  I've found myself without the community of friends that the
>Mormon church had provided, because one of the first things I was taught
>was that anything outside the LDS church was an abomination to God.
>Thankfully, this isn't so.

I'm also thankful this isn't so, Becky.  I'm am sorry you were told that
anything outside of the LDS Church would be an abomination to God, because
it simply isn't so.  There is much that is "virtuous, lovely, or of good
report or praiseworthy" in other Christian denominations--indeed, in many
of the other religions of the world.  I hope you recognize where that quote
comes from: Joseph Smith's inspired recording of the Articles of Faith.  In
closing, I'd like to quote just a little more of article number 13: ". . .
we follow the admonition of Paul," Becky, "We believe all things, we hope
all things, and hope to be able to endure all things."  I wonder if you
have pondered these thoughts recently.  You were seemingly unable to
"believe all things" when you learned of eternal principles that you hadn't
been taught at an earlier age.  It seems you were not able to "endure all
things" when the buffetings and the trials came your way.  I'm truly sorry,
and saddened by your story.  Would that it weren't so, and that it could
still have a happy ending.  May I say that I would like you to consider me
your friend, though many miles separate us.  At least there's one person
(and hopefully many others) in the Church that you can call your friend,
who will listen with understanding, and not be critical.  (I pray I haven't
been; I have no desire to offend you.)

God bless,

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| Doug Gould          | Jesus: "Come unto me...my yoke is easy, |
| 5315P@NAVPGS.Bitnet | and my burden is light." Matt. 11:28-30 |
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