HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: jimdean@bnr.ca (Jim Dean)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.baseball
Subject: Your chance to be creative, sarcastic, or just plain rude!
Date: 15 Apr 92 17:06:34 GMT
Reply-To: jimdean@bnr.ca
Organization: Bell-Northern Research
Originator: jimdean@bcrks81


I need help.  Well, yes, that kind as well as the request I'm making
here. My little brother (the World's Greatest Blue Jay Fan -- and of
the non-woofing variety, I might add) are producing our baseball
league's yearly magazine.  This magazine is paid for by a contribution
from each team in the league, is not sold to anyone but just given to
the players, so we are not talking profits here, O.K.?

We'd like some help doing some National Lampoon-style "Letters *From*
the Editor".  For those not familiar with the concept, letters *from*
the editors are phoneys. They are often very biting, or make the
supposed author out to be a fool. It is hoped that they are funny.  We
are adding an optional twist: the editors can respond with snappy
one-liners, Toronto/Ottawa SUN style.

Here are some examples to get your creative juices flowing.

>Dear Sirs,
>
>   You write some good letters, but today I am the greatest.
>
>R.H.
>Oakland

>Dear Sirs,
>   You're not sending me down again. I refuse to go. You can't make 
>me. I'm gonna hold my breath `til I turn blue!
>
>Rob Ducey
>Toronto
>
>(Its O.K. Rob, AAA won't use you either.)

>Dear Sirs,
>
>    Sometimes they make me stand in right field, because nobody 
>really wants me to play, so I just freeze when a ball comes to me. 
>Someone eventually comes to get the ball, and the game continues.
>
>Jack Handey
>Deep Thoughts

Anyway, I'm sure you can do better than this. Please?  Post or e-mail,
I will eventually reward the net with the final selections.

-- 
Jim Dean (Internet: jimdean@bnr.ca) +-----+    President
mild-mannered computer scientist -->|Phone|--> National Capital Baseball League
Bell-Northern Research, Ltd         |Booth|    Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Phone: (613) 763-2135               |     |    Phone/Fax: (613) 723-1580
Fax: (613) 763-7241                 |     |    Hosting the 1993 Baseball
                                    +-----+      Canada Cup (Midget (16-18))
"Has posted more recently, but is still less famous, than Al Feldstein"
Newsgroups: rec.sport.baseball
From: thf2@ellis.uchicago.edu (Ted Frank)
Subject: Re: Rickey Henderson v Nolan Ryan -- Stat-head call to arms!
Reply-To: thf2@midway.uchicago.edu
Organization: University of Chicago Computing Organizations
Date: Wed, 15 Apr 1992 16:05:50 GMT

In article <1992Apr15.102351.950@gacvx2.gac.edu> klund@guajillo.gac.edu (Kevin T Lund) writes:
>In article <167C9CAF8.CAVGEOE@YaleVM.YCC.Yale.Edu>  writes:
>>      ON A RELATED NOTE, it seems I've been taking some serious shit on
>> the net for saying what I did -- I've been called fucking nuts, for
>> example, and then there are the people who consider "class" a factor in
>> determining how good a ballplayer is.  Well, change "class" to "race"  
>and
>> you'd capture the opinion of a lot of anti-Rickey, pro-Ryan people...not
>> that I'm accusing anyone on the net of being racist, but you bet there
>> were a lot of racist Americans who just loved it when the press deified
>> Ryan and vilified Rickey.
>
>I really can't believe this!  If this is a RELATED NOTE and you aren't  
>accusing anyone on the net of being racist -- Why the hell do you mention  
>it when comparing Rickey and Ryan as players?!?  Do you really have to  
>bring up race?  Don't try to mess with the issue and bring unrelated  
>topics in.

But it's precisely a related topic.  Just take a look through your papers.
The whites are much more likely to be described as classy players,
the blacks as troublemakers.  (The Pursue the Pennant board game has
actually institutionalized this -- nearly every single Hispanic player
is given a "HOT" rating indicating that they're likely to bean a player,
start a brawl, and/or get themselves ejected arguing strike calls.)
-- 
Ted Frank          + "He wanted to be the car rather than the thimble or the
1307 E 60 St, #109 +  hat."  -- District attorney explaining Marc Cienkowski's
U o' C Law Skool   +  murder with bow and arrow of Michael Klucznik in
Chi, IL 60637      +  Doylestown Borough, PA over a game of Monopoly.
From: mjones@FENWAY.AIX.KINGSTON.IBM.COM (Mike Jones)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.baseball
Subject: Re: NO-HITTERS
Date: 14 Apr 92 20:17:39 GMT
Reply-To: mjones@donald.aix.kingston.ibm.com

In article <167C8D780.CAVGEOE@YaleVM.YCC.Yale.Edu> Jeff Caveny writes:
>      Still, it's silly that the Rules Committee bothers to define the
> term "no-hitter" at all.  I hope Young tosses a "real" no-hitter in his
> next start, when the Committee would have to deal with the VanderMeer
> question.  It'd serve 'em right.

I'd make an attractive wager that if, by chance, one of Nolan Ryan's
no-hitters had been wiped out by the new defintion it would have died a very
quiet death.

   Mike Jones  |  AIX/ESA Development  |  mjones@donald.aix.kingston.ibm.com

Yesterday upon the stair
I met a man who wasn't there.
He wasn't there again today -
I think he's from the CIA.
Organization: Ryerson Polytechnical Institute
Distribution: na
Date: Monday, 6 Apr 1992 09:34:55 EST
From: dangerous alliance <ACPS7151@RyeVm.Ryerson.Ca>
Newsgroups: rec.sport.baseball
Subject: Mike Schooler

For whom it may concern,

Schooler is doing fine is arm is back in condition and he has his velocity back
, but i am still not sure on his reliablity in the pen.  But that is my thinkin
g...
*******************************************************************
* RAVI NARINE      | INTERNET  ACPS7151 AT RYEVM.RYERSON.CA       *
* BASEBALL         | BITNET    ACPS7151@RYERSON                   *
* EXTRODINAIRE                                                    *
* KNOWS ALL SEES ALL                                              *
*******************************************************************
From: CAVGEOE@YaleVM.YCC.Yale.Edu
Newsgroups: rec.sport.baseball
Subject: Re: More on errors/hits
Date: 6 Apr 92 20:56:50 GMT
Article-I.D.: YaleVM.167C1EE56.CAVGEOE
Organization: Yale University

In article <1992Apr6.051149.13148@adobe.com>
snichols@adobe.com (Sherri Nichols) writes:
 
>
>So, we can see from these numbers that there is a slight difference in
>errors and hits; about 7% of the time, errors are going to result in an
>extra base over a hit.  If we take the case of our two hypothetical players
>
     But it does not necessarily follow that you'd rather have the
fielder who doesn't get to the ball than the one who gets to it and
makes an error.  Some of the extra-base hits on ground balls could
be triples, and some of the singles that get through could allow the
runners (other than the batter) to take an extra base, whereas you
hardly ever see anyone take an extra base on a one-base error.  Just
wanted to point this out before the "fielding percentage is important"
people step in and try to use this data as evidence.
 
Jeff Caveney
Newsgroups: rec.sport.baseball
From: ndpope@athena.mit.edu (Kyle E. Pope)
Subject: Re: ALL-Troublemaker Team  :)
Organization: Massachusetts Institute of Technology
Distribution: na
Date: Mon, 13 Apr 1992 22:15:45 GMT

In article <1992Apr13.160249.1869@ulowell.ulowell.edu>, msteeves@cs.ulowell.edu (darkelf) writes:
|> 3B	Wade Boggs		Delta Force, Margo
|> OF	Mike Greenwell		Painting?  What painting?  Oh, hi Mo Vaughn...


   DH   Jack Clark              Jack the Ripper.  
   2B   Jody Reed               I don't care if my raise is over $1M this 
  				year, I WANT TO MAKE $2M.  Matt Young makes
				that much, why can't I?  OK, I'm leaving
				after this year...really, I am...don't try
				and stop me...guys?

	Makes you wonder if the Red Sox ARE the all-troublemaker team. :-)
Jody needn't worry.  The Sox are, IMO, grooming Tim Naehring - SS of the
Future(tm) for 2B since they've decided John Valentin can handle SS next year.
(Next year's Sox infield - Vaughn 1B, Naehring 2B, Valentin SS, Cooper 3b)


|> -- 
|> send all replies to	    |"You're gonna pay, or 
|> msteeves@cs.ulowell.edu or  | Pizza will send out for YOU!!!!!"
|> steevesm@woods.ulowell.edu  |			-SPACEBALLS
|> +++++++++Go Nordiques+++++++|++++++++++++++The Wizard for MVP++++++++++++++++++


					Kyle Pope
					ndpope@athena.mit.edu
From: X005CB@tamvm1.tamu.edu (Chris Barnes)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.baseball
Subject: Re: Rickey Henderson v Nolan Ryan -- Stat-head call to arms!
Date: 16 Apr 92 20:26:12 GMT
Organization: Texas A&M University

In article <1992Apr15.160550.7070@midway.uchicago.edu>
      thf2@ellis.uchicago.edu (Ted Frank) writes:
 
>The whites are much more likely to be described as classy players,
>the blacks as troublemakers.
 
   Then please explain the Rod Dibbles & Len Dykstras of bb.
Not exactly guys I would call classy....
 
    Sorry, but I give the (sports) media and fans a little more
credit than that.
 
      ----------------------------------------------
Chris Barnes            |  "Success is the realization of your
x005cb@tamvm1.tamu.edu  |       worthwhile dreams" ---  Dexter Yager
(409) 846-3273 (home)   |  "A goal is a dream being acted upon"
(409) 845-8454 (work)   |                          ---  Don Wilson
From: mcmath@csb1.nlm.nih.gov (Chuck McMath)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.baseball
Subject: Re: Long Outings
Date: 8 Apr 92 12:57:43 GMT
Distribution: na
Organization: MSD

In article <ku4gvpINN1r6@phakt.usc.edu>, mcdougal@phakt.usc.edu (David McDougald) writes:
> 
> I was pretty surprised to see the length of the outings by pitchers in the
> Opening Day games.  Only three out of fourteen starters in the games with box
> scores in the LA Times went less than seven innings.  Is anyone else surprised
> by this?  If not, perhaps someone can explain it.  (Please don't explain to me
> why Ramon didn't go seven for LA--I heard the game myself.  Maybe Pedro will be
> called up at the start of May to replace his brother in the rotation!!)
> 
> Dave
> 
> 

Not only that, but did you notice how many pitches Jack Morris threw?

144.  That's no typo there.  At that rate, his arm will fall off sometime
around the All-Star break...

chuck

                       --chuck mcmath-
                    mcmath@csb1.nlm.nih.gov
  MSD, Inc. * National Library of Medicine * National Institutes of Health
                       Bethesda, MD 20894
Newsgroups: rec.sport.baseball
From: mattel@auto-trol.com (Matt Telles)
Subject: Re: I Told You Bonilla Was Worth the Money
Keywords: Seriously:  A Truly Different Mets' Team
Organization: Auto-trol
Date: Thu, 9 Apr 1992 15:53:56 GMT

In article <Apr.8.14.57.51.1992.1640@aramis.rutgers.edu> rinehart@aramis.rutgers.edu (Mark J. Rinehart) writes:
>In article <1992Apr7.182619.27305@auto-trol.com> mattel@auto-trol.com (Matt Telles) writes:
>
>> In article <1992Apr7.135124.26463@porthos.cc.bellcore.com> dick1@hera.uucp (25436-vaughn) writes:
>
>> >In their place are (again, in order of importance):  Al Harazin,
>> >Jeff Torborg, Bobby Bonilla, Bret Saberhagen, Eddie Murray and
>> >Willie Randolph.
>> 
>> Murray and Randolph will have to prove themselves to me, as ballplayers.  The
>> rest are just great acquisitions.
>
>Will have to *prove* themselves to you, as ballplayers???? Do you
>doubt their worth as ballplayers? Or do you doubt their worth to the
>team? What? Your statement mystifies me.

I thought the remainder of the post cleared that up.  I meant that I had no
doubts about their "moral integrity", but that their skills as players had to be
proven to still be of major-league caliber.

These guys are *old* (for ball-players).  They have to show *me* (my own
personal opinion, of course) that they still have what it takes.

Clearer?

Matt

-- 
==============================================================================
Matt Telles 	                 mattel@auto-trol.COM
                                 {...}ncar!ico!auto-trol!mattel
Auto-trol Technology 12500 N Washington Denver, CO 80241-2404 (303)252-2874
Newsgroups: rec.sport.baseball
From: palmer2@vaxr.sscl.uwo.ca (The Econoclast)
Subject: Re:  Josh Gibson (and the Negro Leagues in general)
Organization: Social Science Computing Laboratory
Date: Tue, 7 Apr 1992 10:41:33 GMT

In article <1992Apr5.142813.10127@midway.uchicago.edu>, thf2@ellis.uchicago.edu (Ted Frank) writes:
>>	Very true.  Oscar Charleston stole about the same number of bases.
>>The real differenece between the two was power though, as you mentioned.
>>In Oscar Charleston's Best year he did the following (according to Total
>>Baseball 1991) as compared to Cool Papa Bell
>>
>>		    ave. ab  run  hit  2b  3b  hr  rbi  sb
>>Oscar Charleston:  .445  238  31  106  21  4   20  28   15
>>Cool Papa Bell:    .354  362  39  128  29  7   11  42   24
> 
> This is very curious.  You're talking a man that had 61 singles, 21
> doubles, 4 triples, 15 stolen bases and an unknown number of walks,
> and he only scored 11 runs that weren't off of his home runs?  (As well
> as only an additional eight RBI's...)  Either
> there are incomplete statistics, or the gap between the best and worst
> players in the Negro Leagues is *huge*.
> -- 

	VERY curious. Why did they ever pitch to this guy? How many
intentional walks did he receive?

-- 

  Regards,

  John Palmer      London, Ontario     Voice: (519) 661-3533     FAX: 672-4976
  reply to palmer2@vaxr.sscl.uwo.ca    The Economics Institute for Journalists
  ============================================================================
  The New Economics: Overlapping Generalizations & Rationalized Expectorations
Newsgroups: rec.sport.baseball
From: m_lehoul@oz.plymouth.edu (Michael L. Le Houllier)
Subject: Canada 6   New York 1
Keywords: Expos and Jays swamp Mets and Yanks!!!!!
Reply-To: m_lehoul@oz.plymouth.edu (Michael L. Le Houllier)
Organization: Plymouth State College - Plymouth, N.H.
Distribution: na
Date: Thu, 16 Apr 92 23:16:09 GMT

Well, seems as though Canadian teams have had their way with New York
teams this week.  Over the weekend, the Expos paste the Mets for three
straight victories.  Then, after a minor Jay hiccop in game one
against the Yankees, the Jays put the Bronx Babies in their place,
taking the next three games.

Though I hold no delusions that the Expos will reach the Series, the
Jays have as good a chance as anyone.  Nonetheless, I can still dream
of an all Canadian World Series.




-- 
 Michael Le Houllier           *  John 3:16  * Nov 12, 1991 - Dili      
 (m_lehoul@oz.plymouth.edu.us) *  Remember: June 4, 1989 - Beijing
 Go BLUE JAYS  9-1    Mop up the Yanks, bring on the Slop Sox.
 CANADIENS:  First Round  vs. Hartford Whalers... give us a real team!
Newsgroups: rec.sport.baseball
From: snichols@adobe.com (Sherri Nichols)
Subject: Re: More on errors/hits
Organization: Adobe Systems Incorporated
Date: Mon, 6 Apr 1992 16:39:08 GMT

In article <1992Apr6.154250.16137@panix.com> spira@panix.com (Greg "Sarcasm Is A Way Of Life" Spira) writes:
>Can you tell if the infield position played makes a difference?  I think
>most of us would suspect that the grounball hits that are going for extra
>bases are almost all going down the line, by the first and third baseman, and
>not in the middle by the shortstop and second baseman.

Sure.  It just requires some more work.

Sherri Nichols
snichols@adobe.com




Newsgroups: rec.sport.baseball
From: snichols@adobe.com (Sherri Nichols)
Subject: Re: Phillys injuries
Organization: Adobe Systems Incorporated
Distribution: na
Date: Fri, 10 Apr 1992 20:43:28 GMT

In article <1992Apr10.194750.11943@cbnewsh.cb.att.com> seth@cbnewsh.cb.att.com (peter.r.clark..jr) writes:
>I'll be honest, I'm not a big fan of stats, so I don't have tons of
>data to support my claim. But in my opinion, a general rule in sports -
>ALL SPORTS - is that defense is much more important than offense. If
>we were to go back over the years, I would be very surprised if
>baseball teams that had the ability to score lots of runs were winning
>more, or even as many, championships when going up against teams with
>superior defenses. I'm quite sure that I could support this claim in
>hockey and football as well.

So let's see some support.

Sherri Nichols
snichols@adobe.com

Newsgroups: rec.sport.baseball
From: snichols@adobe.com (Sherri Nichols)
Subject: Re: Rickey Henderson v Nolan Ryan
Organization: Adobe Systems Incorporated
Date: Thu, 16 Apr 1992 15:49:53 GMT

In article <reynard.703357513@usceast.cs.scarolina.edu!> reynard@susie.cs.scarolina.edu (John Reynard) writes:
>If you love Rickey so much explain why he stinks when he is upset at the team  
>for not giving him more money.

I can't.  He hasn't stunk.

Sherri Nichols
snichols@adobe.com
From: az1@ukc.ac.uk (A.Zafar)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.cricket
Subject: Re: good news about pakistan team!!!!
Date: 11 Apr 92 00:55:28 GMT
Reply-To: az1@ukc.ac.uk (A.Zafar)
Organization: Computing Lab, University of Kent at Canterbury, UK.

In article <14644@vela.acs.oakland.edu> mamohamm@vela.acs.oakland.edu (SKEPTICAL) writes:
>In article <1992Apr9.143816.6945@ctr.columbia.edu>, ali@elara.ctr.columbia.edu (M. Ali Hanafi) writes:
>> In article <1992Apr9.035646.3749@gw.wmich.edu> from x91ahmed4@gw.wmich.edu
>> one reads:
>> 
>> >good new guys.....pakistan is going to tour england for a cricket tournament
>> >and with help of God be victorius ........
>
>> Gosh, this must be a new desi Rip Van Winkle...  
>
>
>> P.S. Does God bowl fast out-swingers or off-cutters?
>
>
>	Got a mean late leg cutter too....I heard.
>Regards,

	What is a late leg cutter???? Does the ball bounce twice in this
case?

--
			 - Aman Zafar 			_   /|
			 - University of Kent 		\'o.O'
			 - England. 			=(___)=	
							   U
From: sanjay@augean.eleceng.adelaide.edu.AU (Sanjay K. Mazumdar)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.cricket
Subject: Re: Tendulkar for Yorkshire
Date: 9 Apr 92 00:18:58 GMT
Organization: Electrical and Electronic Eng., University of Adelaide

In article <25870001@aspen.IAG.HP.COM> shankar@aspen.IAG.HP.COM (Shankar Unni) writes:
>In rec.sport.cricket, az1@ukc.ac.uk (A.Zafar) writes:
>
>>      I guess he is in. Yorshire are going to sign him up within the next 48
>> hours. The contract is to be for a duration of one year. Yorkshire TV, who
>> have given 100,000 pounds in sponsorship money have insisted that a top class
>> replacement be made for Craig McDemmort. (ITV report).
>
>Oh, and what happened to ol' Craig?  Hadn't he just been signed just at
>the end of last season?  Is he injured or something?

McDermott is having an operation on his groin very soon. Therefore he was
forced to pull out of the contract with Yorkshire. I'm sure Yorkshire
will not be complaining about McDermott's replacement.

Sanjay Mazumdar
-- 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| E-mail    : sanjay@eleceng.adelaide.edu.au                                   |
| Snail-mail: Dept of Electrical & Electronic Eng., The University of Adelaide |
|             GPO Box 498, South Australia  5001                               |
From: moghal@aludra.usc.edu (Nadeem Moghal)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.cricket
Subject: Re: good news about pakistan team!!!!
Date: 11 Apr 1992 06:03:16 -0700
Organization: University of Southern California, Los Angeles, CA
NNTP-Posting-Host: aludra.usc.edu


>> M.Ali.Hanif  writes:

   P.S. Does God bowl fast out-swingers or off-cutters?

>> Arun Simha writes

   Neither, but, he does send rain after a dismal batting performance :-) :-)
   :o) :@) etc.


>>God bowls late out swingers and sometimes heartbreaking  yorkers.
>>Loooooks  very dejected after his teams performance.  Arun why feel 
>>shy in accepting the reality. We are proud that what Pakistani
>>team has obtained on 25 th March was long time before predicted
>>by great  Sunil Gavasker.

>   Looks like you're not up to date with the rsc articles or
>   you would've read my posts in which I've gloated over the 
>   Pakistani teams' performance! 
>       Heck....and I thought that four smiley's would do the
>   job!
>
> Arun
> 
>

Well, I certainly did see the smileys, and thought it was really funny. 
Yes, we can laugh at such things, without making it a prestige point!

What Pakistan did on 25th March, nobody needs to tell us. And no amount
of accolades or atricities would change that. But the fact remains that
on the first of March this year, God *was* extra nice to the Pakistani
cricket team!


Nadeem Moghal

USC






Organization: Masters student, Information Networking Institute, Carnegie Mellon, Pittsburgh, PA
Newsgroups: rec.sport.cricket
Date: Sun, 12 Apr 1992 01:26:13 -0400 
From: Prakash Panjwani <pp1x+@andrew.cmu.edu>
Subject: Re: A memorable performance of Azaruddin

Just a few remarks regarding Mr. Pandian's article about NZ's last visit
to India...
-India won the series 2-1. They won the first and third tests. Hadlee
bowled very well in the second test (which NZ won) but the real hero of
the test was Bracewell. Hadlee still had 10 wkts in the test.
-The one day match in which Azhar scored a very fast century (I am not sure
if it was the fastest ever) was played at Baroda. Some credit of that victory
also goes to Manjrekar, who scored 52 (I have the score-card before me :-))
-Vengsarkar also played in the match; he was, of course, the captain. And
so did Chetan Sharma. I don't know how you got the idea that Hirwani was
a regular member of the side. He did well in the tests in that series but
he did not play in any of the one-day matches.
-The complete scores of that one day match:
 NZ -- 278/3 off 50 overs (Wright 70, Greatbatch 84*, Jones 57) Venkatramana
was the only bowler  to make an impression on the batsmen, finishing with
2/36 off ten overs
 India -- 279/8 off 47.1 overs (Azhar 108 off 64 balls with 3 sixes and 10
fours, Manjrekar 52, Ajay Sharma 50)
-It was a great series for Sir Hadlee; he had 18 wkts in four innings!!
From: 9063iyerm@vms.csd.mu.edu (Murali Iyer)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.cricket
Subject: Re: rec.sport.cricket
Date: 13 Apr 92 14:58:55 GMT
Article-I.D.: vms.00959088.790DFE80
Reply-To: 9063iyerm@vms.csd.mu.edu
Distribution: rec.sport.cricket
Organization: Marquette University - Computer Services

In article <1992Apr11.184138.27459@uokmax.ecn.uoknor.edu>, aksimha@uokmax.ecn.uoknor.edu (Arun Simha) writes:
>
>  All this is purely from memory. ..so I fear I'm scalding myself:-))

            <some stuff deleted>
>
>  Zaheer Abbas ct S.Amarnath b Gavaskar 196.
>   Most of the time he bowled the spectators by imitating the actions
>   of Qadir, Willis, Imran and co. I have never seen even Mushtaq Ahmed
>   imitating Qadir so well. :-) <----this is a smiley, it means that the
                             ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
>   above statement was made in jest. 
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
>
> Arun 
 
 Boy, are we scalded!!!! :--) Can I get you some "Burnol", Arun? 

As "The Thinker" :--) says,

Stay Cool,

-Murali.

                               Murali Iyer 
Office: (414) 288 6890                             Home  : (414) 288 8576
Marquette University                               722, N.13th Street, #511,
Computer Services Division                         Milwaukee, WI 53233.

Newsgroups: rec.sport.cricket