From: jwwalden@miavx1.acs.muohio.edu (B-I-RITH)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Potstickers  [long....]
Date: 13 Apr 92 22:23:25 GMT
Organization: Dept. of Physics

In article <s2dmnINN47g@agate.berkeley.edu>, erikred@ocf.berkeley.edu (Erik Nielsen) writes:
> In article <92099.085819AXM113@psuvm.psu.edu> AXM113@psuvm.psu.edu (Abner Mintz) writes:
>>Tizrak walks over next to the dragon and says
>>      "Well, the Grey Lady probably won't mind, but don't you think it would be
>>polite to move off of the Giant?"
>>
>>A startled "Mrrrph" comes out from under Birith, followed by sounds of Erik
>>talking to Kitten elsewhere in the room.  ^
>>
>>"Never mind, it sounds like he already escaped ..." 
> 
> One of the numerous Giants running around the Place runs up to BIrith, lifts
> him up, and...  er, one of the Giants _tries_ to pick BIrith up, screams
> "HERNIA!!!" and collapses under a table.  Mike anxiously pours a large mug
> of akvaavit down his throat, at which point the Giant stops writhing and
> lies still, a smile imbedded on his face.
> 
> Three more Giants, seeing their fallen comrade, er, fallen, rush up to the
> dragon.
> 
> They look at the dragon.
> 
> They look at each other.
> 
> They look at the dragon again.
> 
> They break into a huddle.  "mmmmmmshnazzle-frazzlemmmmmWith a
> Melon?!?mmmmshnazzle-frazzlemmmmmHut, hut, hike!"  With a clap of the hands,
> they break huddle and slink up to the merrily eating dragon.  One of them
> ceremoniously holds out his hand.  Another solemnly pulls a feather off the
> bird in the corner (sorry, Archteryx!).  The third carries the feather over
> to the first.  The first grasps the feather gingerly and proceeds to waggle
> it in the dragon's left nostril.
> 
> "AAAHHHH!!!"  breathes BIrith.  "AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!  AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH-
> CHOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!"
> 
> The Giant calmly pulls back his burning hand, walks five feet to the tub of
> water, and submerges his entire arm, whilst a beatific smile graces his
> features.
> 
> In the meantime, the other two Giants, standing prepared, whisk a giant
> pancake out from underneath the convulsive dragon.  They drop the pancake.

Birith looks quite interested at the giant pancake, wondering if there's any
giant syrup to go with it...but then again he still has potstickers...

> It floats slowly to the floor.  The Giants look at each other.  They sadly
> shake their heads.  One of them pulls a whistle out of his pocket and blows
> it; as he blows, a low rumbling sounds forth from the whistle.
> 
> Suddenly, the door to Callahan's bursts open, and a VW Bug rushes in.  (Big
> door, huh?)  The VW weaves around several tables on a haphazard course for
> the gathered Giants.  It stops inches away from the pancake, and the door
> opens.  Out springs-- another Giant!  Behind him comes another, and another,
> and another, and-- hey, give me a break, I can only fit four Giants in a VW
> at a time!

Birith blinks at all the many, many giants, wondering if there's something he
didn't notice previously in those potstickers!
 
> The newly-arrived Giants gather around the pancake and pull out bike pumps.
> sticking the nozzles haphazradly into the pancake, they start pumping
> madly.  Soon enough...  they stop for a beer.  "Hey, Mike, four Guinni!"
> They loaf, they drink, they tell crude jokes, and then one looks at his
> watch.  "Whoops!  We're back on, boys!"  Pump, pump, pump.  
> 
> "Hmm," says one Giant, "I don't recall him being quite that big before."
> 
> "Hmm," says another, "I don't think his head was quite that swelled before."
> 
> "Hmm," says another, "I think I like vanilla."
> 
> The fourth one unplugs the various nozzles, and lots of air escapes.
> "Thanks, fellows," says the re-inflated Giant.  "See you later!"
> 
> "Bye!"  They wave, then, using incredible Yoga mastery (yours for only
> $19.95), the Giants fold back into the VW and take off.  (The mechanics of
> folding Giants into VWs has baffle physicists for years.  The most popular
> theory suggests that Giants actually fold space around them.  Even more
> baffling, however, is VW's success, considering the limited market of
> dwarves and midgets towards which they target their cars.  Farvegnugen, my
> ass.)

P'relan looks up from a rather intimidating heap of quantum optics texts to nod
agreement to VW's (and other cars) being designed for dwarves and midgets. 
Thinking about the problem, he nods and begins, pencil in hand, to work on the
problem of how to fold Giants (and P'relans) into these small cars...
 
> The reconstituted Giant breathes a breath of fresh air and suddenly sniffs
> the incredible aroma of potstickers.  Turning wildly, he spies a dragon
> eating potstickers.  Horrors!!!  This is indeed a calamity!!!  He rushes
> towards the potstickers, bellowing at the top of his lungs, 

Birith eeps (in a rather large un-eep-like brassy voice), <<Another Giant!!!>>

> then notices
> (with more than a little awe) the incredible number of potstickers still
> left.  Nodding gratefully to the Grey Lady, and smiling benificently at the
> dragon, the Giant leans up against the bar, content to munch and share.

Finding the Giant to be surprisingly peaceful (and he does smell a bit like
pancakes which make wonderful draconic breakfasts), Birith warbles happily and
continues munching potstickers, even offering to roast some of the Giant's (his
potstickers, that is) if he likes them that way...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
P'relan (and Birith)		   "Jellicle Cats come out tonight
jwwalden@miavx1.acs.muohio.edu      Jellicle Cats come one come all
or jwwalden@miavx1.bitnet           The Jellicle Moon is shining bright"
Newsgroups: alt.callahans