HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: gooley@netcom.com (Mark. Gooley)
Subject: from the cultural wasteland
Organization: Netcom Online Communications Services (408-241-9760 login: guest)
Date: Sun, 20 Dec 1992 23:09:08 GMT

Colorado Public Radio today broadcast the first sacred music I'd ever
heard on their station.

For their "Bachs Lunch" feature, they had "Christmas Music by J. S. Bach."
They began with the opening chorus from the secular cantata "Toenet, Ihr
Pauken!" which was either adapted from or for (depending on what Great
Expert you believe) the first cantata of the Christmas Oratorio.

I called the station and talked to the DJ.  "That's the secular version,"
I explained.  "It's got almost the same music, but those words have nothing
to do with Christmas."

"How interesting," he said, which is 80's-90's-speak for "please fuck off,
I don't need a dipshit smartarse like you giving me grief."  "It was on
a Christmas album, you see."

Then he played excerpts from the first cantata of the Christmas Oratorio,
starting with the sacred version of what he'd just played.

Then he played "Sheep may safely graze," which is from another secular
cantata having nothing to do with Christmas.  I didn't call back.

Mark., I know that none of you give a flying fuck about this, but I am
living in a cultural wasteland full of pretentious twits who think that
they're cultured
gooley@netcom.com
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: cj@eno.esd.sgi.com (C.J. Silverio)
Subject: Re: I just gots to know.
Reply-To: cj@sgi.com
Organization: SGI TechPubs
Date: Fri, 18 Dec 92 01:50:59 GMT

In article <1992Dec17.153948.24487@atlantis.uucp>, aaron@atlantis.uucp writes:
|Why is it that cj's name is sometimes "C J Silverio" and other times
|"C.J. Silverio"?

An Easy but Stupid Answer:

Posts without the dots are from rn/Pnews.  I can customize
the header in those posts with an environment variable.

Posts with the dots are from my graphical threaded newsreader,
turn.  To customize a turn header, I have to edit by hand, which
I rarely bother to do.  Turn gets its header info from (among
other things) yp info.  And my yp (excuse me, NIS; FUCK YOU
BRITISH TELECOM) name has dots in it so it will match with the
corporate "locate" database, viz:

eno% locate cj
cj@wpd.sgi.com  C.J. SILVERIO   1645  09L-535  Dev. Docs

I can't get the idiots who maintain that database to remove
the dots.  And if my yp name fails to match the locate name,
the nightly update script will blow away the email address,
and people won't be able to find me.

DID THAT MAKE SENSE?
AREN'T YOU GLAD YOU ASKED?
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: aaron@atlantis.uucp
Subject: Tinfoil
Reply-To: aaron%atlantis@kakwa.ucs.ualberta.ca
Organization: Atlantis Communications, Edmonton, AB, Canada
X-Newsreader: TIN [version 1.1 PL7]
Date: Thu, 17 Dec 1992 15:26:13 GMT

My wife and I were wrapping Christmas presents a couple of days ago.  One of
them was a watch for my father-in-law, who breaks one every year.  Once the
watch-case was wrapped, I commented that it looked like a little car.  So we
made little wheels(from sections of wrapping-paper tube wrapped in tinfoil)
and headlights with eyes drawn on them.

There was an irregularly-shaped piece of tinfoil left over.  I wrapped it
around the index and middle fingers on my left hand and taped it, with some
vague notion of simulating a "broken-finger" cast(even though I've never had a
broken bone in my life).

Then I typed with it for half an hour, until the tinfoil started to get very
sweaty and uncomfortable on the inside.  That stuff just doesn't breathe well.
It's very strange hitting every key on the left-hand side of the keyboard with
your ring finger.  It's still a bit sore.

-- 
---Alfvaen(Still looking for "October's Baby")
"I never gave it a thought, I never thought I should think                       I would go along with anyone and anything"  --Rupert Hine
Current Album--Johnny Clegg & Savuka:Shadow Man
Current Read--Michael Coney:Charisma
From: joshua@coombs.anu.edu.au (Joshua Geller)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Leary, Manson, Kleps and other questions...
Date: 16 Dec 92 00:40:55 GMT
Organization: Australian National University
NNTP-Posting-Host: 150.203.76.2

cj@eno.esd.sgi.com (C.J. Silverio) writes:


>In article <1gep30INN54c@tamsun.tamu.edu>, bpb9204@tamsun.tamu.edu writes:
>|Who is Tim Leary?  

>Timothy Leary's dead.

nononono he's outside.

josh
'looks like shit'

Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: lstewart@watserv1.uwaterloo.ca (L. Stewart -- IS Office 1058)
Subject: Re: Bad News
Organization: University of Waterloo
Date: Wed, 16 Dec 1992 19:36:03 GMT

In article <1992Dec16.080743.1866@wetware.com> mlegare@wetware.com (Dr. Robert (BoB) Tech) writes:
>If you're reading this right now, you're a God.  
>Right Now.  Officially. 
>
>There's been a big shakeup in the management, and
>well, they're looking for new blood.  So To Speak.
>
>I suppose most of you are going to laugh this off,
>but I really would recommend nailing down Your 
>Place In The Pantheon soon.  I suggest you pick one
>specific thing and stick with it, instead of trying
>to be Everything To Everyone, like those Greek Gods.
>
>I don't have to tell you the kind of workload Apollo
>had on a Monday, now do I?
>
>Avoid General Areas of Influence.  Don't say Love, 
>but rather Courtship, Infatuation, or maybe Drunken
>Lust Fit.  Get the idea?  Ok good.  
>
>Get your submissions in quick.  First come, first
>ascended.  Any discrepancies will be settled by
>the followers - which is usually the case in these
>things anyway.
>
>
>-- 
>if one falls on you,
>we just carve your name on it
>and leave it there...
>mlegare@wetware.com

Okay then, I ghots the dibs on being the ghod of
making it look like I am far busier than I am at
the same time as I am quietly ammusing myself by
pursuing pointless and non-work related pleasure
whilst others strive to pick up my slack because
the work still gets done but I don't help out as
much as I should.

I hope that isn't too long a title.

How about the Ghod of malicious procrastination.

And what about the membership cards, eh?
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: jcarroll@ferris.cray.com (Jeff Carroll)
Subject: pi envy
Originator: jcarroll@ferris
Organization: Ale 'R' Us
Date: 15 Dec 92 00:06:57 CST


In article <1gj2r8INNr6k@chnews.intel.com>, bhoughto@sedona.intel.com (Blair P. Houghton) writes:
> In article <of=9pqa00awIA1919N@andrew.cmu.edu> Court Demas <court+@CMU.EDU> writes:
> >of.. Blair P. Houghton@sedona (835)
> >> In article <1992Dec14.031232.8788@murdoch.acc.Virginia.EDU> mad5c@uvacs.cs.Virginia.EDU writes:
> >
> >> >Pi: 3.1415926535897932384626433832795028841971693993751058209749445923078
> >> [...]
> 
> <*plonk*> Again.
> 
> >..164026862089986280348253421170679..
> 
> Y'know, the sad part is he probably did the computation
> to get those digits...he probably wrote a routine to
> do it for him...he probably wrote it in lisp or BASIC...

Somewhere between puberty and college, I memorized 26 places of pi.

During my early years of collegiate culture shock, while I slowly
shed my rustic juvenile illusions, I often repeated those
digits silently to myself in the face of the repeated taunts and
mind games of the malicious Ivy League rejects so characteristic
of the Northwestern student body.

I somehow managed to remain quite impressed with myself until I met
a nice Italian girl from Joliet who knew 50 places of pi.

Life hasn't been the same since.
From: kludge@grissom.larc.nasa.gov (Scott Dorsey)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Hmmm....
Date: 15 Dec 1992 14:35:59 GMT
Organization: NASA Langley Research Center and Reptile Farm
NNTP-Posting-Host: grissom.larc.nasa.gov

In article <1gis43INN86n@milk.Warren.MENTORG.COM> tal@Warren.MENTORG.COM (Tom Limoncelli) writes:
>In article <MJD.92Dec13033409@saul.cis.upenn.edu> mjd@saul.cis.upenn.edu ("[*] Sayushka Ivanov") writes:
>
>>People who have had sex with me never forget me because I am the only
>>person any of them know who hits them over the head with a heavy
>>dictionary before, during, and after.
>
>I just use one of those small pocket spelling dictionaries.  I wonder
>what Freud would say.

Freud would probably use a German dictionary.
--scott
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: carasso@Turing.ORG (Roger Carasso)
Subject: JAPANESE SHIT SOUNDS
Organization: The Turing Project, Public Access Internet Host
Date: Fri, 18 Dec 1992 19:12:13 GMT


High technology in Japan ...

========================================================================
)From miki@okilab.oki.co.jp Wed Dec 16 04:34:12 1992
)Subject: Recession and new technologies to save money
)
)Hello,
)
)Many Japanese companies are eager to save money by changing even small
)points.  This effort seems to lead to more introduction of new
)technologies.
)
) For example, is a small electric sound device for restrooms, which is
)placed near a toilet paper roll and produce flushing sound of water when
)pushed. This enables to save water significantly. This is invented because
)Japanese people usually flush a toilet at least twice per one use: first to
)make unpleasant noise unhearable for others in a restroom, second to
)actually flush a toilet. The device can eliminate the former. It is well
)accepted especially by women.


carasso,
spanning the globe
From: jvogel@math.rutgers.edu (jeff vogel)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Last ssc before break.
Date: 18 Dec 92 19:13:30 GMT
Organization: Rutgers Univ., New Brunswick, N.J.

I fervently, secretly hope Hillary Clinton will leave her husband, as that 
would exponentially increase by odds of bagging her.

					- Jeff Vogel
					Rutgers math


Have a non-fatal Holiday, and don't shoot food.
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: pfinerty@nyx.cs.du.edu (fun fun fun boy)
Subject: Re: Hey, PJ!
X-Disclaimer: Nyx is a public access Unix system run by the University
	of Denver for the Denver community.  The University has neither
	control over nor responsibility for the opinions of users.
Organization: Nyx, Public Access Unix at U. of Denver Math/CS dept.
Date: Tue, 15 Dec 92 03:18:07 GMT

In article <1992Dec14.215040.19639@mail.cornell.edu> jea1@cornell.edu (John Austin) writes:
>I heard on the radio that a Secret Service van (unspecified color and
>windowstatus) on the streets of Wash, D.C. was hit by a bullet yesterday. 
>Nobody was hurt, and the official story is that it was a stray shot from some
>indigenous armed yahoo.
>
>Hmmm.   And just where were you yesterday?
>

i have no memory of this whatsoever. i completely and categorically deny
any all charges you might make against my person. i'm terribly sorry but i
just don't remember that ever happening. you said it was when? no, i'm
sorry, i think i was asleep that day.
--
			PJF--->Biochem. grad student
			      PUBLIC ENEMY #1
From: robert@aero.org (R. S. Statsinger)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Leary, Manson, Kleps and other questions...
Date: 15 Dec 1992 16:51:24 GMT
Organization: Newbies R Us
NNTP-Posting-Host: itro7s.aero.org

In article <tjrdnt8@zola.esd.sgi.com> cj@sgi.com writes:
>
>In article <1gep30INN54c@tamsun.tamu.edu>, bpb9204@tamsun.tamu.edu writes:
>|Who is Tim Leary?  
>
>Timothy Leary's dead.

 		Timothy Leary LIVES
(the Pop-o-pies; reprinted without permission, so sue me.....)

What's the scoop on Timothy Leary
Has his name all over the place
I hear he's got a brand new theory
He's gonna take us into space......

He really loved his LSD
Really thought it was great
He wants to dump it in the water supply
And leave the rest to fate

He used to work for the CIA
They didn't like his brain
He gave'em all some LSD
And drove'em all insane.........
Timothy Leary LIVES
Timothy Leary LIVES
Timothy Leary LIVES
Timothy Leary LIVES

He learned alot from the CIA
When he was at West Point
He majored in philosophy
And how to roll a joint......
Timothy Leary LIVES
Timothy Leary LIVES
Timothy Leary LIVES
Timothy Leary LIVES

[really cheesy vocal imitation of electric guitar solo]

Timothy Leary LIVES
Timothy Leary LIVES
Timothy Leary LIVES
Timothy Leary LIVES
They really loved this fucking hippie 
In the CIA
And through their collective efforts,
They made the world what it is today.

Dr. Tim's got a brand new plan 
To raise a low IQ
Buy his teeshirts, eat his pills
That's all you have to do.

He's also got another pill 
To make you live real long
But if it don't work you won't know
'Cause you'll be dead and gone.....
Timothy Leary LIVES
Timothy Leary LIVES
Timothy Leary LIVES
Timothy Leary LIVES

				R.S.

(I may have left out a verse, because my beloved Pop-o-pies
tape was stolen, along with my car, in the aftermath of the LA riots...)
From: bhoughto@sedona.intel.com (Blair P. Houghton)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Amazing slogan for a vegetable
Date: 18 Dec 1992 22:09:07 GMT
Organization: Intel Corp., Chandler, Arizona
NNTP-Posting-Host: stealth.intel.com

ken@aiai.ed.ac.uk (Ken Johnson) writes:
>                           BROCCOLI!!
>          THE ONLY VEGETABLE THAT SOUNDS LIKE AN ADVERB!!
>                       HAW! HAW!! HAW!!!
>                  COMPLETELY UNLIKE POTATOE!!!

"Hand me that vegetable," Tom said broccoli.

				--Blair
				  "'Diane Keaton is HILLARY!'
				   Starring Charles Durning as Bill.
				   Elizabeth Ashley will play Chelsea.
				   And introducing Roger David Carasso
				   as Socks the Cat (with a special
				   appearance by the Enquirer Alien
				   as James Carville)."
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: pfinerty@nyx.cs.du.edu (fun fun fun boy)
Subject: Butras (sp) Ghali
Organization: Nyx, Public Access Unix @ U. of Denver Math/CS dept.
Date: Wed, 16 Dec 92 00:58:47 GMT

on npr this afternoon there was a segment on El Salvaldor and the recent
disarming of the rebels. Butras Ghali, who's name i am sure i am
slaughtering, made a point of saying that it will take a while for things
to get back to normal. dan quayle was there. i don't know if he was
accidentally reading dan's script or not. i wish i could have been there
and just when he said that i would run up on stage and say, in multiple
languages, 
			DUH. REALLY?

--
			PJF--->Biochem. grad student
			      PUBLIC ENEMY #1
From: mike@elec.canterbury.ac.nz (Cosmik Debris)
Subject: Re: 6 hours later, off th fuckin wagon
Organization: Electrical Engineering, University of Canterbury, New Zealand
Date: Wed, 16 Dec 1992 04:21:51 GMT

In article <1992Dec14.213626.6671@murdoch.acc.Virginia.EDU>, rwd4f@poe.acc.Virginia.EDU (Rob Dobson) writes:
> 
> well, its exam week here at uva. this means that in addition to the
> normal work i avoid to read news, there will be tons of other work,
> mostly assisting brain dead students in listening to music for their
> exams. so i tells myself "i wont read news this week."
> 
> and i made it till 3:30 monday, pretty fucking impressive. but i broke
> down and decided to binge, so i read all 330 articles in t.b. in one
> sitting. actually, after the killfile did its gory work on them, only
> about 200 had survived. had i known then what i know now, jochim would be
> in there and i would have been spared at least 10 one line follow ups.
> 

This is not bizarre nor in the least bit interesting. Leave now!

-- 
Cosmik Debris -- "I owe money, therefore I am"
From: curtis@cs.berkeley.edu (Curtis Yarvin)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: kit
Date: 16 Dec 1992 06:40:01 GMT
Organization: CS Dept. Snakepit - Do Not Feed.
NNTP-Posting-Host: cobra.cs.berkeley.edu

In article <1992Dec16.045022.6038@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> pfinerty@nyx.cs.du.edu (fun fun fun boy) writes:
>
>on my way from the parking lot to the store i fell and
>broke my right leg and my left arm.

See?  What did I tell you.

I mean, has anything bad happened to _you_ in the last three months?

Huh?  

Yeah?  

Oh, that's bullshit.  Little penicillin clear that up _right_ away.

c
From: curtis@cs.berkeley.edu (Curtis Yarvin)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: realization
Date: 21 Dec 1992 04:42:49 GMT
Organization: UC Berkeley CS Dept.
Distribution: world
NNTP-Posting-Host: cobra.cs.berkeley.edu

Lee Harvey Oswald is the deus ex machina of modern American history.

c
From: zgilbert@titan.ucc.umass.edu (Zvi Gilbert)
Subject: Balloons
Summary: balloons 
Keywords: balloons
Organization: crystallized time
Date: Sun, 20 Dec 1992 01:45:05 GMT


Balloons are heartbreaking. 

When first bought, they look so shiny, so colourful. 
They look so friendly: "Hi there Mr Balloon!"

Sooner or later, they sink.  They shrivel.
They roll around on the floor, sad and silly and ugly.

Or they pop, and scare you, and you end up with shreds.

Or they escape, and fly up into the sky, WITHOUT YOU.

Balloons remind me of my mortality.
Balloons don't respond.
Balloons are placebos given to unhappy children.
Balloons betray your trust.
Balloons are a cliche of forced festivity.

Loneliness is a balloon.

--Zvi
zgilbert@titan.ucc.umass.edu
"There is no need to stop with one cat or two or three etc."
From: hirschgm@cnsvax.uwec.edu
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: cathy's response to sioux's flames
Date: 17 Dec 92 10:41:25 -0600
Organization: University of Wisconsin Eau Claire

In article <BzDG94.HHE@jfwhome.FUNHOUSE.COM>, jfw@jfwhome.FUNHOUSE.COM (John F. Woods) writes:
> In <1992Dec14.214646.2822@cnsvax.uwec.edu> hirschgm@cnsvax.uwec.edu writes:
>> yadda yadda yadda whine whine whine
> 
> *plonk* *plonk* *plonk*
> 
>>I do not intend to try to please or impress you.
> 
> I can assure you that you are in NO DANGER WHATSOEVER of doing that.

So killfile me and shut up.
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: gooley@netcom.com (Mark. Gooley)
Subject: interesting fact
Organization: Netcom - Online Communication Services  (408 241-9760 guest) 
Date: Wed, 16 Dec 1992 16:20:03 GMT

Actually a Dull Fact.

"Nair" hair remover was named after Vikram Nair, the Indian-American who
invented it.

Mark., it's "nah-eer," sort of, and that's how I pronounce the name of
the product as well
gooley@netcom.com
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: sabbott@nmsu.edu (SDA)
Subject: Re: SWANSONG.....
Organization: WHorshipers of Lady LibertY (WHoLLY)
Date: Tue, 15 Dec 1992 17:36:32 GMT


pfinerty@nyx.cs.du.edu (fun fun fun boy) writes:

>   you might talk with the ss. for what it's worth, i'm sure most people here
>   are fairly worthwhile people except for maybe K*nt and Duh, but they can't
>   help it. 

gee, I guess I'm the only one but I kinda liked Kent . . . not that I
agree with his views but he writes better than most of the people on
t.b.

--


	\\\\\sean/////
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: kevin@wicat.com (Kevin Vigor)
Subject: brain damage in Salt Lake City
Summary: If i were you, I wouldn't be me
Keywords: weasels rip my flesh
Organization: WICAT Systems
Date: Fri, 11 Dec 1992 23:46:45 GMT


So I walk into my Automated Teller Machine (tm) (which, in these colder
climes, tends to live in its own little heated glass-encased finiancial
outhouse). On the wall, three-odd feet from the actual machine, I see a 
sign reading "If you are disabled and unable to use this machine, please
call 1-800-whatever".

Then below it the message was repeated in braille.

It's so heartwarming to know that if a blind man walks into this machine
and suddenly realizes "Damn! I'm blind! I can't use this machine" and feels
walls at random for an hour or so, he will discover that all he needs to
do is find the nearest pay phone. Which probably has a sign in braille 
saying "if you are disabled and unable to use this telephone, you're fucked."

What a better world it is!

-- 
		Peace & PopTarts, 
			Kevin
Email to the reply address will almost certainly bounce; use
72500.3705@compuserve.com
From: osa@wilbur.unh.edu (Bart Simps.. er.. Oktay Ahiska)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: BOring, stupid, self indulgent post, *plonk* me...
Date: 17 Dec 92 04:13:57
Organization: Springfield Elementary School
Distribution: talk
NNTP-Posting-Host: wilbur.unh.edu
X-Advertisement: Use Emacs
Comments: Confuscious Say (#18) : Man who put head on railroad track
	get splitting headache. 


Well, aren't modern software development tools great? Here's a sample
session: 

we are here...1
we are here...2
..
[a billion like this
..
we are here...9
we are here...7
we are here...10
we are here...1
we are here...2
we are here...3
we are here...5
we are here...8
we are here...9
we are here...7
we are here...10
tcp write: errno 32 from socket
tcp write: errno 32 from socket

DEC AVS V4.0 exited

ARGH. PLEASE FLAME ME FOR WASTING MY TIME AND YOURS. 
--
The opinions expressed above are my own, and not necessarily those of UNH.

                               HUG ME!

Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: k206027@smog.DKRZ-Hamburg.DE (Bakayaroo Banzai)
Subject: Re: __ is the __ of the '90s
Organization: Return to Traditional Nukeylar Values     
Date: Thu, 17 Dec 92 09:33:02 GMT

In article <1992Dec16.042726.40782@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu> mlsa@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu (MICHAEL LAUREN SHERMAN) writes:
>After reading this damn news group over and over again I have the perfect ----
>is the ------ of the 90's:  talk.bizarre is the Black Death of the 90's  why
>do I keep reading, same reason I masterbate with a cheesegrater, I like pain.
                                  ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
if there's anything left when you're done would you just
sprinkle it on my burrito?     

Bakayaroo Banzai
Tip: Grated Monterey Jack-off goes well with all Mexican Dishes
From: reese@vax.oxford.ac.uk
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: So long, grad school
Date: 14 Dec 92 17:42:55 GMT
Distribution: talk
Organization: Oxford University VAX 6620

In article <OSA.92Dec10001651@orville.unh.edu>, osa@orville.unh.edu (Bart Simps.. er.. Oktay Ahiska) writes:
> 
>                                HUG ME!

No.  Next?

Jason
From: jvogel@math.rutgers.edu (jeff vogel)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Something I'd consider bizarre...
Date: 17 Dec 92 00:25:54 GMT
Organization: Rutgers Univ., New Brunswick, N.J.

Tounge piercing.

("Well, cleaning out the hole after eating jerky is a pain in the ass,
but the cunnilingus is fantastic.")

					- Jeff Vogel
					Rutgers math
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: kevin@wicat.com (Kevin Vigor)
Subject: Re: cathy's response to sioux's dildo
Organization: WICAT Systems
Date: Fri, 18 Dec 1992 22:33:09 GMT

gary@sci34hub.sci.com (Gary Heston) writes:

>In article <larne.04vq@canetoad.UUCP> larne@canetoad.UUCP (Larne Pekowsky) writes:
>>In article <1992Dec15.192830.12361@wam.umd.edu> kimy@wam.umd.edu (Yong-Mi Kim) writes:
>>>In article <MJD.92Dec15120341@saul.cis.upenn.edu> mjd@saul.cis.upenn.edu ("[*] Angel of Wax") writes:
>>>>Ho ho!  Yes, the only Hassid in the world with a penis ring.

>>>soc.singles response: "You'll have to promise to show it to me at the next
>>>boink! :) "

>>>alt.romance.chat response: "What's a penis ring?  Anyway, *kisses* and
>>>*hugs*."

>>sci.math response: What two operations have you defined over your penis?

>net.technonerd response: Is that a multimode or singlmode fiber in your ring?

alt.binaries.pictures.erotica response: Get this shit out of this group and 
into abped where it belongs!

soc.women response: So? Are we supposed to be impressed by this symbol of the
Evil Male Phallocracy Cabal? Loser!

soc.motts response: Cut or uncut?

alt.sex.bondage response: Remember to clean thoroughly after sticking it up
your SO's gentle nether regions!

rec.boats response: Can you get a boathook through it?

alt.drugs response: Wow! If you like get a fish-tank pump and, like, some
tubing, you could smoke pot through your dick! Like, cool!

talk.bizarre response: *plonk* [somebody had to do it]

comp.os.os2.advocacy response: Yeah, but can it format a floppy in the
background without hurting performance?

alt.hardcore response: Oh yeah? A buddy of mine used to have a tire iron
stuck through his dick. *That's* real hardcore, not that loser lame ring 
pussy shit!

misc.utah response: What's a Hassid? What's a penis?

	Kevin "could go on like this for days" Vigor


-- 
		Peace & PopTarts, 
			Kevin
Email to the reply address will almost certainly bounce; use
72500.3705@compuserve.com