From: blake7@herahera.cc.bellcore.com (berardinelli,james)
Subject: Review:  HEXED 
Organization: Bellcore, Livingston, NJ
Date: Mon, 25 Jan 93 13:40:42 GMT
Summary:   slasher satire


HEXED

     Running Length:  1:33
     Rated:  R (Language, nudity, sexual situations)

     Starring:  Ayre Gross, Claudia Christian, Adrienne Shelly, Norman Fell
     Director:  Alan Spencer
     Producers:  Marc S. Fischer and Louis G. Friedman
     Screenplay:  Alan Spencer
     Music:  Lance Rubin
     Released by Columbia Pictures

Matthew Welsh (Ayre Gross), a clerk at the Holiday Palace Hotel, is a 
dreamer who has trouble keeping straight the line between fantasy and reality.  
His life takes a turn for the bizarre when Hexina (Claudia Christian), 
the world-famous model, checks into the hotel.  Through an elaborate ruse, 
Matthew manages to lure her back to his apartment for a night of wild, 
uninhibited passion.  Unfortunately for him, sex isn't the only thing Hexina 
gets him involved in.  Matthew soon learns that she also has a thing for 
knives and guns.

Occasionally, small-budget comedies with relatively-unknown actors can be 
charming and entertaining (witness 1992's THE CUTTING EDGE with Moira 
Kelly and D. B. Sweeney).  HEXED is not such a film.  While it obviously 
cost little to produce, and offers Norman Fell as its best-known name, 
"entertaining" is about the last word I would use to describe it.  Offensive, 
humorless, and tiresome are more appropriate adjectives.

While comedies are not generally known for advocating a social agenda, 
HEXED is reprehensible in the attitude it presents.  Originally scheduled 
for a 1992 release, it was temporarily shelved after the Los Angeles riots.  
The reason is obvious:  a scene where uniformed police officers beat an 
unarmed man.  Designed to parody the Rodney King incident (with the line 
by the white victim of "I'm a Republican" supposedly providing the irony), it's 
unclear why this moment wasn't relegated to the cutting room floor - its 
presence is disgraceful.  Only the most twisted mind will find humor in lam-
pooning such an event.  

On top of that, the film's attitude toward blacks is disturbing. The sole black 
character in HEXED is a valet who is portrayed as being stupid and selfish.  
In no scene is he presented in a positive light.  While an injustice like this 
might go unnoticed in other movies, attention is drawn to it by the afore-
mentioned parody of the King beating.  I won't go so far as to charge director/
writer Alan Spencer with racism, but he is guilty at least of insensitivity.  

HEXED is yet another in a long line of supposed comedies that doesn't 
contain a single humorous line. The placing and intent of the jokes is obvious, 
but they're all so juvenile that even the easily-amused will discover little to 
make them laugh.  Most TV sitcoms serve up better fare.  This film did not 
elicit one chuckle from me, and that's rare for even the most lame of movies.

As a satire, HEXED is no more successful than it is as anything else.  There 
are quick visual references to BASIC INSTINCT, FATAL ATTRACTION, and a 
number of other slasher/exploitation films, but none of these are memorable 
or amusing.  They lack teeth and wit.

Finally, a word should be said about the performers.  They deserve to be in a 
box-office bomb.  They have no range. It's a fair indication of how intolerable 
they are to say that Norman Fell's performance is among the most credible.  
Claudia Christian does a fine job by the standards of high camp, but even her 
die-hard fans would be hard-pressed to justify sitting through ninety minutes 
of this dross simply to listen to her screeching lines, and watch her making 
faces and strutting around in a black leather mini-skirt.

It's curious that HEXED was released to theaters in the first place.  It's the 
kind of movie that, on those occasions when it gets filmed, usually goes 
straight to video.  From the reception it got from the pitifully small crowd 
on "opening night", it won't take long to reach there. This review is a warning 
not only to miss it on the big screen, but to give it an equally wide berth  
when it's available for the smaller one.

                             Rating:  1.9 (F, *)


- James Berardinelli (blake7@cc.bellcore.com)
Newsgroups: rec.arts.movies