HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: tim@physics.orst.edu (Tim Mefford)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Kind of like hiding the knives
Keywords: Losers
Date: 6 Oct 92 20:13:45 GMT
Reply-To: tim@physics.orst.edu
Organization: Up the,

I've finally figured out the true usefulness of an undergraduate
college education.  I'd always wondered, considering it to be a 
largely useless waste of time.  22-year olds graduating are not 
really any smarter than their contemporaries who've been in the 
real world.  They aren't any more emotionally mature either, but
that is the key point.

The value of a four year college education is to keep the student
busy so he won't completely fuck up his life until he does mature
a little.  All the undergraduates are safe from doing things like
marrying the high-school sweetheart/grocery checker and squeezing
out 3 kids before 21, safe from stupidity like joining the Army,
or marrying that cool guy with the great drug connections.  It 
likewise fills the hours that might be spent joining some fundamental
religion, or getting a pool cue through one's teeth.  It staves off
the temptation to attend beauty school or the technical auto institute.


I'd like to thank everyone for their recipes, Dan, Jenny, Al, and
everyone else.  If I ever am close enough to visit any of you, maybe
we'll go out to eat.

Curtis, the banana thing sounded kind of good, what was your mistake?

I did, for those concerned, succeed at lasagna last night; I've food for 
a week.

ObPeeve: I went to the grocery store while really hungry.  I hate it when 
         I do this. I only spent $70 last night, but it's been worse in the
         past.  There's no way in hell I can eat all of this food before some
         of it gets stale.   I think I'll be gaining some weight this week.

-- 
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Tim's to do list ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
1. Get old, die.
2. I must not think bad thoughts.
3. Get mine before this fetid rotting contaminated carcass we 
   call Earth collapses about our collective head.
4. Read a good book.
5. Eliminate homicidal clones of self.
6. Consult hyperintelligent aliens about personal life.
7. Make itemized account of all precious bodily fluids.
8. Play basketball.
9. Sell Michael Eisner plan to turn Buddha into animated 
   Saturday morning crimefighter.
10.Collect ozone in tiny little bottles, sell as souvenirs in 20
   years, get rich.
11.Point out connection among Maastricht passage, freak storm,
   and biblical prophecy for food.
12.Redeem cereal box top for Hubbel space binoculars.

---------Tim Mefford      tim@physics.orst.edu-----------------
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: potler@umbc4.umbc.edu (Laura Potler (GSFC))
Subject: Re: Those damn MENTOS commercials!
Keywords: scrotum polish?
Organization: University of Maryland Baltimore Campus
Date: Sat, 26 Sep 1992 16:47:50 GMT

In article <1a10mgINNgfe@agate.berkeley.edu> curtis@cs.berkeley.edu (Curtis Yarvin) writes:
>In article <1992Sep26.041317.2278@umbc3.umbc.edu> potler@umbc4.umbc.edu (Laura Potler (GSFC)) writes:
>>
>>speaking of ads of questionable taste... how come we see so many ads for 
>>feminine hygiene products yet what about masculine hygiene products, hm??
>>surely men are in need of similarly mysterious products.
>
>Tenderubbies Foreskin Wipes.
>Extra-Thin Q-Tips, for Cleaning those Sensitive, Hard-To-Reach Spots.
>Butt Tampons For Him.
>Fuller's Scrotum Polish.
>
>This the sort of thing you mean, Laura?

why, yes, curtis! exactly! what?? do they only show these ads during
sporting events and other manly shows?

and what about adult diapers? hm? surely old men suffer from incontinence, too.

-l "...with liberty and embarrassment for all" p
-- 
-lp  **********************************************************************
*   "the *ocean* is affected by the phases of the moon but men aren't?!"  * 
*							--Anne Tucker     *
***************************************************************************
From: geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM (Geoff Miller)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Those damn MENTOS commercials!
Date: 28 Sep 92 15:44:41 GMT
Followup-To: alt.peeves
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Menlo Park, Ca.
NNTP-Posting-Host: purplehaze.corp.sun.com



In article <lc8415INN36d@exodus.Eng.Sun.COM> banta@blagg.Eng.Sun.COM 
(242 lbs before cooking) writes:

>(Laura Potler (GodawfulSmelly,FunkyCunt)) writes:


Jeezus!  Quaffing a bit of the hop, were you?

Don't sweat it, though.  I'm sure I'll post some strange stuff myself, once
I get off my ass and cobble together a hookup from home.


Geoff


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 "There was this 3/50 back at Pyramid that I wanted to rename "roundheels,"
                  because it kept going down."  --  booter
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Xref: sparky alt.peeves:15155 alt.politics.correct:5613 talk.religion.misc:17725
From: padutton@wpi.WPI.EDU (Peter Alan Dutton)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves,alt.politics.correct,talk.religion.misc
Subject: Re: Esoteric Skinhead O'Connor (Was stuff about Mac D's)
Date: 6 Oct 1992 17:00:58 GMT
Organization: Worcester Polytechnic Institute
NNTP-Posting-Host: wpi.wpi.edu

In article <1992Oct6.111639.7977@ac.dal.ca> 01sybok@ac.dal.ca writes:
>In article <1992Oct5.134746.8281@umbc3.umbc.edu>, potler@umbc4.umbc.edu (Laura Potler (GSFC)) writes:

>> peeve: skinhead o'connor. where i agree with some of her ideas, her methods
>> 	are a bit extreme.

>This reminds me. My aunt told me that Skinhead was on Saturday Night Live 
>a while back, and was singing with a lot of Jewish religious things around her
>(I don't know what sort of things she had as props, since I don't know anyone 
>who is Jewish... not counting a couple of net-people). Anyway, at the end of 
>the song she holds up a picture of the Pope, which she rips to shreds, and says
>"Let's fight the real enemy." Does anyone know what the HELL she was talking 
>about?

This was just this past weekend - she had a Star of David around of neck
(which she has since mentioned reflects her interest in Rastafarianism), a
few candles, and sang a stream-of-consciousness a capella rant about 
racism and child abuse, which was inoffensive, but tiresome and trite. At
the word "evil", she holds up a picture of the Pope, and proceeds to do what
you say.

I didn't understand her point either, but apparently, she has always believed
that organized religion is evil and somehow responsible for her being 
abused as a child. How organized religion is too concerned with material
things. Maybe she'll choke on all the dough she's raked up in the last few
years.

Antipeeve: Her career is probably all but over now.

>Peeve: "stars" who use political causes to grandstand

I couldn't agree with you more. I couldn't care less what Joan Jett has to
say about abortion, what the Go-Go's have to say about fur, or what John
Cusack has to say about George Bush. 

Peeve: "Stars" who look at their "stardom" as a license to be experienced
	political pundits. Their social causes are often self-congratulatory
	and brainwashing enough. Just because they're lucky enough to have
	gotten a record deal or to have slept with the right people to get
	in a movie doesn't make them any more astute and knowledgeable about
	politics than the average Joe.

Peeve: Some people probably listen to them.

MajorPeeve: MTV "News". Enough said.


Peter!

Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: nolan@twg.com (Nolan Hinshaw)
Subject: Re: Human sheep
Reply-To: nolan@twg.com
Organization: Bach Chowder & Marching Society
Date: Wed, 30 Sep 1992 17:45:02 GMT


Sheesh! The subject reminds me of the Coyote song from the Messiah!
--
Nolan "We like sheep" Hinshaw
Internet: nolan@twg.com			Dingalingnet: (415)962-7197	
"Grab Dick and come on down"  Don Pette
"Texas is like an old woman's pussy.  Everyone knows its down there but
nobody gives a fuck."  - Overheard on CB radio, compliments of 
	bberbeni@nyx.cs.du.edu (Bill Berbenich)
"Boy, was I in for a dose of reality." Randall K. Abler
"... necrophilia doesn't really hurt anybody."  Rick Gordon
"Well, first of all, your stance is too wide"

Xref: sparky alt.peeves:15007 alt.folklore.urban:24549
From: padutton@joseph.WPI.EDU (Peter Alan Dutton)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves,alt.folklore.urban
Subject: McDonald's and the IRA (Re: Big mac's and students)
Date: 30 Sep 92 16:59:23 GMT
Organization: Worcester Polytechnic Institute
NNTP-Posting-Host: joseph.wpi.edu

In article <9209301504.AA03236@client47.comlab.ox.ac.uk> Alan.Crowder@prg.oxford.ac.uk writes:
>
>Whats more i no longer take my daughter for a treat at McDonalds now
>i have found out they donate money (yours and mine) to the IRA.
>For those of you who dont know the IRA, well they are a terrorist
>organisation in Northern Ireland fighting for freedom supposedly.
>In excess of 7m dollars last year.

I'm crossposting this one to alt.folklore.urban, because it sounds
like it belongs there. Perhaps there should be an alt.folklore.urban.mcdonalds
as well... ("I've found out that McDonald's cuts down rainforests to look
for worms to put in their hamburgers...")

In any case, this brings up a related peeve: Protesters at St. Patrick's
Day parades who hold up signs saying "Give Ireland Back To The Irish" and
such, not caring that the average participant doesn't care for much more
than finding the next mug of green beer. And that the IRA are a bunch
of twits. And I'm Catholic, so I can say that.

Of course, when it comes right down to it, I'm sure that there is enough
twittitude to go around for both sides, as in most conflicts.

Peter!

(Give Ireland Back To The British!)
From: geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM (Geoff Miller)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Big mac's and students
Date: 5 Oct 92 15:41:02 GMT
Followup-To: alt.peeves
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Menlo Park, Ca.
NNTP-Posting-Host: purplehaze.corp.sun.com



In article <122860045@hpfcso.FC.HP.COM> reykja@hpfcso.FC.HP.COM 
(Reykja Sigurdsson) writes:

>         Where do you get that information? I have heard plenty of rumors
>about the creepy political connections of McDonald's but never the IRA!
>First off (without getting into a major discussion about the merits or
>lack thereof), McDonald's tends to support right-wing causes like 
>traditional family values and George Bush. 

Like any company with a highly visible corporate image, McDonalds tends 
to support not any particular ideology, but whatever causes it's in its 
best interests to support.  That's why we started seeing so many consumer 
products being billed as "American style" this and "family style" that
several years ago, during the Reagan years.  McDonalds is very sensitive 
to cultural trends and bellwethers, and they know what side their bread 
is buttered on.  

For example, McDonalds used foam burger boxes and bleached-paper bags for 
years, while the consumer's primary concerns were freshness and appearance,
until the nation got into the ecomania fad.  Now they use old-style cardboard
and wax paper food wrapping and brown bags as a sop to (as they put it) their
more "environmentally sensitive" customers.


>         Another note: it is possible that an organization could 
>contribute money to the relief agency in Ireland (I can't recall the 
>name -- it is a series of initials similar to NORAID) but they could
>not contribute directly to the IRA. The CIA would be all over them like
>flies on doo-doo. 

NORAID is in fact the name of a prominent Ulster relief agency.  Didn't 
you read _Patriot Games_?  :^)



Geoff


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Geoff Miller                    + + + + + + + +        Sun Microsystems
geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM  + + + + + + + +     Menlo Park, California
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From: booter@Autodesk.COM (Elaine Richards)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Boys N' Toys ( was Re: School is Back  etc.
Date: 2 Oct 92 20:04:52 GMT
Organization: The Autodesk Menagerie - Housecat Division

In article <1992Oct2.000407.13891@bbxrbk> russ@bbxrbk (Russ Kepler) writes:
>In article <92Oct01.135915.21445@acs.ucalgary.ca> parr@acs.ucalgary.ca (Charles Parr) writes:

[Various manly postings about killing bunnies with various exotic and
expensive weapons].

I read all of it. I came up with an image of Russ on his belly in camo
with all these guns, scopes and a bandolier stalking his dinner in the
form of a wabbit.

Then another image came to mind. An Eastern European gramma goes to
the bunny hutch with a big knife. Shriek! Whack! Slice, cook, plotz
and dinner is on the table.

Peeve: Men make simple matters so darned complicated with all those
toys they MUST MUST have.


ER
--

---------------------------------------------------------------------------
"I just couldn't take the green brain carpet, so I had to kill it."
					-R. Hep
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: parr@acs.ucalgary.ca (Charles Parr)
Subject: Re: Ship jumping (was Boss Peeve)
Date: Tue, 29 Sep 92 14:00:45 GMT
Organization: The University of Calgary, Alberta

In article <Bv5Aw8.L79@nic.umass.edu> jennyg@titan.ucc.umass.edu (Jenny Gutbezahl) writes:
Also, you
>best be ready to get past my new Chef/Bodyguard, Charles, whose job descrip-
>tion includes protecting what little virtue I have left.
>
Lets make that "jealously guarding what little virtue you have
left"

heh heh heh

Sorry, but my life is so dull and meaningless that flirting on
newsgroups constitutes a thrill;-).

Glad to hear I been hired. I assume I'm on your payroll, rather
than having all four trotters in the peevton civic trough like the rest
of these career chairwarmers?

Regards, Charles
-- 
Within the span of the last few weeks I have heard elements of
separate threads which, in that they have been conjoined in time,
struck together to form a new chord within my hollow and echoing
gourd. --Unknown net.person
Xref: sparky alt.peeves:15115 alt.tasteless:10846
From: geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM (Geoff Miller)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves,alt.tasteless
Subject: Re: Woe is Me
Date: 5 Oct 92 15:19:19 GMT
Followup-To: alt.peeves,alt.tasteless
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Menlo Park, Ca.
NNTP-Posting-Host: purplehaze.corp.sun.com




In article <Bv5L8o.1v5@acsu.buffalo.edu> v222p9ns@ubvmsb.cc.buffalo.edu 
(A PFC, AND DAMNED PROUD TO BE) writes:

>	Or, as a friend of mine used to say to me after a heavy night of 
>drinking, "How about a nice, greasy pork sandwich, with some mayonnaise that is
>just starting to turn yellow and hard around the edges?" 


Or how about a cup of warm Wesson oil, or perhaps cold lamb gravy?


Geoff


-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-
"The examples of stupidity that they come up with each week bring a smile
to my face and lighten my day.  My favourite example is the mother who buys
the small child a toy that is specifically designed to make small children
want to stick it in their mouths and choke on it. I love those. Another one
of the little noise machines down.  -- Anthony Cunningham
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From: tim@physics.orst.edu (Tim Mefford)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Clinton Licks Bush
Keywords: Losers
Date: 28 Sep 92 21:21:42 GMT
Reply-To: tim@physics.orst.edu
Organization: Up the,

The idiots who believe in polls have decided that the challenger
would win in this fall's election.  I find myself extremely bored
with almost any talk of the election.  Ironically, I used to become
upset with those who didn't want to discuss the economic philosophies
which I felt were the real issues.  I've come to realize that the
explanation of Clinton's present position has nothing to do with what
we are led to believe are the issues and I now understand to be totally
irrelevant to the election.

The entire explanantion comes from one event in 1980.  Ronald
Reagan was elected President.  Two things came from this.  With
the support of white male southerners he instituted a series of
policies beneficial to the rich minority and detrimental to the
poor majority.  These produced today's voter dissatisfaction with
the incumbent.  In response to this event, the Democrat's vowed
to regain these white Southern males.  They instituted the "Super
Tuesday" primary system.  Because of this plan, the press declared
Bill Clinton the primary front-runner.  Because the press declared
Clinton the favorite, he won the nomination.  This situation is the
result of things that happened quite a while ago; we can't change them
now.  Therefore, I feel that any discussion of Bill Clinton's merits
as a candidate is a waste of breath.


-- 
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Tim's to do list ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
1. Get old, die.
2. I must not think bad thoughts.
3. Get mine before this fetid rotting contaminated carcass we 
   call Earth collapses about our collective head.
4. Read a good book.
5. Eliminate homicidal clones of self.
6. Consult hyperintelligent aliens about personal life.
7. Make itemized account of all precious bodily fluids.
8. Play basketball.
9. Sell Michael Eisner plan to turn Buddha into animated 
   Saturday morning crimefighter.
10.Collect ozone in tiny little bottles, sell as souvenirs in 20
   years, get rich.
11.Point out connection among Maastricht passage, freak storm,
   and biblical prophecy for food.
12.Redeem cereal box top for Hubbel space binoculars.

---------Tim Mefford      tim@physics.orst.edu-----------------
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: parr@acs.ucalgary.ca (Charles Parr)
Subject: Re: Possible Conspiracy Uncovered
Date: Tue, 06 Oct 92 16:26:21 GMT
Distribution: alt
Organization: The University of Calgary, Alberta

In article <ld3b2nINN8p1@jethro.Corp.Sun.COM> geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM (Geoff Miller) writes:
>
>
>After a lunchtime conversation with JZ yesterday in which we discussed 
>the whereabouts of a certain powder blue Sprite race car, it dawned on
>me that I've never seen any blue powder.  
>
>How do expressions like this get started, figures of speech that have no
>basis in reality?  Who comes up with them, and why?  Is it a conspiracy
>to drive the human race slowly nuts?  Are the Reptoids involved?
>
>Okay, who has the blue powder?  I bet the Air Force has some, locked in
>a tightly-guarded hangar somewhere along with those frozen alien bodies.

It gets worse.

Okay, it gets better.

You *do* know where they get Baby Powder and Baby Oil, don't you?

Regards, Charles
-- 
Within the span of the last few weeks I have heard elements of
separate threads which, in that they have been conjoined in time,
struck together to form a new chord within my hollow and echoing
gourd. --Unknown net.person
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: potler@umbc4.umbc.edu (Laura Potler (GSFC))
Subject: Re: Big mac's and students
Organization: University of Maryland Baltimore Campus
Date: Mon, 5 Oct 1992 13:47:46 GMT

In article <122860045@hpfcso.FC.HP.COM> reykja@hpfcso.FC.HP.COM (Reykja Sigurdsson) writes:
>         Where do you get that information? I have heard plenty of rumors
>about the creepy political connections of McDonald's but never the IRA!
>        Check your facts. That sounds like one of those rumors that starts
>without any sort of basis in fact. 

i have a young cousin who has a lot of health problems. wound up a mcdonalds
house for a while. after seeing how they took care of the family and the child,
well, that's good enough for me. when i can stomach their food, mcdonalds gets
my support.

peeve: skinhead o'connor. where i agree with some of her ideas, her methods
	are a bit extreme.

relatedpeeve: people with good voices that spend too much time pushing their
	own politics and not enough time singing.

obrelatedjoke: did you hear sinead o'connor has come out with a new shampoo?
		it's a roll-on.

unrelatedpeeve: setting your alarm at night and waking up the next morning
	to discover that the station you've set to has completely different
	programming in the morning.

-l "this is not a rebel song...this is sunday, bloody sunday..." p

-- 
-lp  **********************************************************************
*   "the *ocean* is affected by the phases of the moon but men aren't?!"  * 
*							--Anne Tucker     *
***************************************************************************
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: bberbeni@nyx.cs.du.edu (Bill Berbenich)
Subject: Re: Lowest Common Denominator (Was: Boss Peeve)
Organization: University of Denver, Dept. of Math & Comp. Sci.
Date: Fri, 2 Oct 92 03:23:22 GMT

In <ATAYLOR.92Oct1151837@gauss.nmsu.edu> ataylor@nmsu.edu (Nosy) writes:

>	When in Las Cruces, eat at Dick's Cafe.....pulp
>	novel, it ain't.

There's a joke in there somewhere.

I just know it...
--
"Texas is like an old woman's pussy.  Everyone knows its down there but
nobody gives a fuck."  - Overheard on CB radio
From: geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM (Geoff Miller)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Testing new newsreader, was: (Re: Mea Culpa)
Keywords: Pretend It's Candy
Date: 29 Sep 92 15:42:17 GMT
Followup-To: alt.peeves
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Menlo Park, Ca.
NNTP-Posting-Host: purplehaze.corp.sun.com



In article <1992Sep29.011456.3889@usage.csd.unsw.OZ.AU> 
allane@earth.gas.unsw.OZ.AU writes:

>Anyway, that is all past but now I have a new problem: 80+ line posts. 
>This newsreader automatically wraps lines that are greater than 80 
>characters... watch the flames flare.

>Does anyone REALLY give a shit? No probably not. 


Well, I do, because I don't understand what you're getting at.  It's
generally considered bad form to post articles with lines greater 
than 80 characters in length anyway, right?  So it seems to me that your
newsreader's autowrap function is a feature, not a bug, and something
to be thankful for because it saves you the necessity of watching the
length of your lines yourself.  What's the problem?


Geoff


-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-
  "School buses in my area now have the recent addition of a flashing white
 light on their roofs.  It's a good thing, too, because I was having trouble 
    spotting those three ton, two-story bright yellow hunks of screaming 
  kid-filled metal whenever I went for a drive.  This is sure to save some 
                          lives." -- Mark Schnitzius
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From: jeremy@castle.ed.ac.uk (JHenderson)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Stupid system messages
Date: 30 Sep 92 12:36:12 GMT
Organization: Edinburgh University

In article <SJL.92Sep29150254@stork.doc.ic.ac.uk> sjl@doc.ic.ac.uk (Steve J Lacey) writes:
=>>>>>> On 28 Sep 92 09:26:40 GMT, jeremy@castle.ed.ac.uk (JHenderson) said:
=>
=>
=>JHenderson>    Broadcast Message at 10:21 ...
=>
=>JHenderson>         *** Shutdown message for maps from paul@maps ***
=>
=>JHenderson> maps going down at 13:00
=>JHenderson>         ...to replace power supply
=>
=>JHenderson> Broadcast Message at 10:26 ...
=>
=>JHenderson>         *** Shutdown message for maps from paul@maps ***
=>
=>JHenderson> maps going down at 13:00
=>JHenderson>         ...to replace power supply
=>
=>
=>JHenderson> So tell us, paul@maps, are you going to send a message every five minutes
=>JHenderson> for the next three hours to tell us about this shutdown?
=>
=>MajorPeeve: People who peeve constantly about these messages. You mean
=>you don't want to know that the machine is going to go down? Ok... the
=>shutdown program is a tad brain dead...

Yes, I want to know *once* that the machine I am working on is going down.
I don't want to know *every five minutes* that *some other machine* is
going down. Geddit?



-- 
=======Jeremy Henderson========jeremy@castle.ed.ac.uk===============
Newsgroups: alt.peeves