HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: jfw@jfwhome.FUNHOUSE.COM (John F. Woods)
Subject: Re: Hello?
Organization: Misanthropes-R-Us
Date: Thu, 13 Aug 1992 03:27:16 GMT

In <1992Aug12.214859.18030@aio.jsc.nasa.gov> walker@superboy.jsc.nasa.gov (Doug Walker) writes:
>   May you be happy becoming what you post.  Refer to the second line of
>   my original post.

"See Figure 1."
From: bc@Apple.COM (bill coderre)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: dream analysis
Date: 12 Aug 92 16:26:28 GMT
Organization: Apple Computer Inc, Cupertino, CA

Hmmm, let's see:

|then 			again, by this			reasoning
|about			half of what i post 
|belongs in 		alt				.prose, 1/4 of my 
|stuff 			in rec.arts			.poems, and the
|			rest in				misc.test.
|B			oB
|t			eC				h

There.

Now it's appropriately divided, I think.

mr HEINOUS
glad to			be of				service
sorry for		the				inconvenience
From: heim@vms.macc.wisc.edu (JOHN HEIM	)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Twin Peaks Convention
Date: 19 Aug 92 14:09:34 GMT
Organization: University of Wisconsin Academic Computing Center

I was watching one of those semi-news programs last night while making 
supper and they had a story about a Twins Peak convention out west 
somewhere.  (I was going to say Oregon but it couldn't be - the sun was 
shining.)

They showed some kid talking to a character who I believe they called 
'The Log Lady'.  He was carrying around a stick and he told her that 
it was easier to carry around a stick than a log.  The kid's 
father was standing behind him looking just as proud as could be.

I will never again make fun of Star Trek conventioneers.

John G. Heim                                 Email:  heim@macc.wisc.edu
From: 5405P@CC.NPS.NAVY.MIL ("Alfred Lord Tennyson")
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Morte D'Rictus
Date: 13 Aug 92 19:21:08 GMT

More things are wrought by Rictus Hep than this newsfroup dreams of.
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: al037@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (Dave Polewka)
Subject: Re: Bush Campaign TV Ad
Reply-To: al037@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (Dave Polewka)
Organization: Case Western Reserve University, Cleveland, OH (USA)
Date: Sat, 22 Aug 92 05:08:16 GMT


In a previous article, hlynka@server.uwindsor.ca (Myron Hlynka) says:
                       ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

>>>      Who is Bush?

 hlynka@server.uwindsor.ca -- anagrams (@=a)
**************************************
 1. New York has a sun-clad river!
 2. We run hanky drivel, Sarcaso!
**************************************
-- 
=======================
"Endeavor to persevere"
=======================
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: aaron@space.ualberta.ca (Aaron Humphrey)
Subject: Re: Do you people have jobs?
Reply-To: aaron@space.ualberta.ca
Organization: University Of Alberta, Edmonton Canada
X-Newsreader: Tin 1.1 PL4
Date: Fri, 14 Aug 1992 19:16:50 GMT

fuhrmann@avd20.larc.nasa.gov (Henri D. Fuhrmann) writes:
: Hhmm ?

Not for much longer I don't.

Damn government cutbacks.

--
---Alfvaen(a.k.a. Aaron V. Humphrey)
"So you found a girl who thinks really deep thoughts
 what's so amazing about really deep thoughts"  -- Tori Amos
Current Album--Some Kind of Wonderful Soundtrack
Current Read--Henry David Thoreau:Walden and Other Writings
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: aaron@space.ualberta.ca (Aaron Humphrey)
Subject: I'm flabbergasted
Reply-To: aaron@space.ualberta.ca
Organization: University Of Alberta, Edmonton Canada
X-Newsreader: Tin 1.1 PL4
Date: Tue, 18 Aug 1992 21:25:32 GMT

After reading about a hundred posts rot13'd, looking for pronounceable words,
I'm suddenly dumbfounded by the rot13 syllogism

green--terra

<This message has breen printed on recycled ASCII.>

--
---Alfvaen(a.k.a. Green Nysinra)
"So you found a girl who thinks really deep thoughts
 what's so amazing about really deep thoughts"  -- Tori Amos
Current Album--Tom Tom Club:Boom Boom Chi Boom Boom
Current Read--Henry David Thoreau:Walden and Other Writings
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: jfw@jfwhome.FUNHOUSE.COM (John F. Woods)
Subject: Re: Rejected Game Shows
Organization: Misanthropes-R-Us
Date: Fri, 21 Aug 1992 01:01:12 GMT

In <Bt9LpK.L7w@rice.edu> andsol@owlnet.rice.edu (Andrew J. Solberg) writes:
>Andrew Solberg          |"If I were your wife I'd poison your tea!" 
>Undying University Mooch|              Anon. Outraged British Woman
>andsol@owlnet.rice.edu  |"And if I were your husband I'd drink it!"
>Phone:713-529-8627      |              Winston Churchill

Alright.  This inaccurate quote has gone on long enough,
it's time to correct it.

First, of all, it wasn't an anonymous outraged british woman:
it was a very young Margaret Thatcher.  Second of all, the
dialog went:

	If I were your wife, I'd piss in your tea!

	Meet me upstairs in 5 minutes, I have to get the whips
	and silk stockings out of my car's boot.

Please correct your .signature.  Thank you.
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: osa@wilbur.unh.edu (Bart Simps.. er.. Oktay Ahiska)
Subject: Re: best in bed, best in space, best for the needs of his countrymen
X-Advertisement: Use Emacs
Organization: Springfield Elementary School
Date: Mon, 17 Aug 1992 01:35:47 GMT
Comments: Little Jack Horner's problem is more serious than he thinks!


"jv" == Johnathan Vail <vail@tegra.COM> writes:

jv> I was working for DG up in New Hampster (right down the
jv> street from where Oktay is, actually).  

Right down the street from where I live is Domino's Pizza.  Did they
used to be DG? 



--
oktay ahiska, dept. of cs, unh, durham nh, 03824 
the opinions expressed above are solely my own. i don't represent unh. 
and here's the last five. it's educational. it's educational. 
it's educational.  it's educational. it's educational.
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: chaos@netcom.com (chaos)
Subject: bile speenage
Date: Fri, 21 Aug 92 08:51:18 GMT
Organization: tyrninog and the heisenberg vortex


reasons to hate people:

all the women are after the men.
all the men want to go to bed.


chaos

"uh, so what's the problem?"
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: alexo+@cs.cmu.edu (Alex Orenshteyn)
Subject: Re: A fantasy
Organization: School of Computer Science, Carnegie Mellon
Date: Fri, 21 Aug 1992 00:14:27 GMT

In article <1992Aug20.222707.6863@dartvax.dartmouth.edu> Corby.E.Page@dartmouth.edu (Corby E. Page) writes:
>In article <1992Aug20.204319.8023@murdoch.acc.Virginia.EDU>
>rwd4f@poe.acc.Virginia.EDU (Rob Dobson) writes:
>
>> i have this sudden
>> craving to ingest massive quanitities of hallucinogens, stimulants, and
>> liquor, and then bungee jump naked into the middle of the republican 
>> national convention floor, preferably during Quayles speech tonight.
>
>I'll be watching for you.
>
>corby
>corby@dartmouth.edu


I think those people would be much more offended if you were dressed
in a three-piece suit with a briefcase in hand full of data on how many
more people have become homeless, how many industries bit the dust, how
many more unemployed people they are, how much money was wasted to burn
pot in Latin America (yes, that part of the country) and other accomplishments
realized in the past 12 years and actually (what a nerve you got) tried
to speak about these things at the convention. Now, that would really make
their bile rise!

Jumping naked of the balcony, hah mild stuff. To offend these people
you have to tell the truth.

Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: cocoa@iat.holonet.net (little 'e')
Subject: The Toilet Revolution!/Revelation!
Organization: The Chocolate Factory
Distribution: usa
Date: Wed, 19 Aug 1992 23:38:00 GMT


As I sat on my "throne" this afternoon, I pondered the revolutionary
idea of co-ed johns.  I envisioned a world of equality between the
sexes.  I envisioned my life in the new world of enlightenment...

I envisioned my father, relocating to the Bay Area, following me with
shotgun in hand as I entered the facilities so he could "Keep those
filthy minded perverts away from his innocent baby girl."  I envisioned my
sex-crazed co-worker following men into the restroom so she could "size
up" the men before deciding to date them.  I envisioned budding romances
dying as men and women listened to each other's bodily functions after
having a bad lunch.

I imagined finally being able to make fun of my brother while he stood in a
defenseless position, thus repaying him for all the mean things he did
to me as a child.  I imagined my friend's jelous wife staring down
other women in the bathroom to make sure they wouldn't look at "her
man."  Men would finally be free to see ugly women prior to putting
their faces on when late to work.  And women would be free to see how
often men changed their underwear.  Those wearing generic cotton briefs
or wild tiger prints would no longer be able to conceal the drabness or
exotic side of their personalities.  The element of surprise in learning
my lover's taste in underfashions would disappear forever.

Fights would ensue as men got hairspray in their eyes while passing the
woman with the big hair.  And women would scratch men with their plastic
fingernails for peeing on their hands while they stood at the sink.
Unisex colognes would become standard once Polo and Obsession became
indistinguishable.  Men would grow accustomed to the words "are you
almost out?  I REALLY have to go" and "You can use the mirror as soon as
I finish putting on my blush."  Women would grow accustomed to hearing
"What is she DOING in there?  It's been five minutes."  and "Why the
hell is there bloody paper in the toilet!?"

Ah yes, the liberty of co-ed toilets.  The brave new world.  But why
stop there when we could have co-ed showers?  Then we could be truly
free to expose our imperfections to the world.  Show me your naked pot
belly, I'll show you my cellulite!  Lift this heavy burden of
concealment from your soul!

Just me,

little 'e'

"My God, it will be beautiful!!" -- Judge Doom in "Who Framed Roger
Rabbit?"

--
*  *  *   Chocolatier at Arms, and Castle Wetware Liason            *  *  *



-- 
Recently re-located, and now permanently residing at _The_Chocolate_Factory_
*  *   e-mail: cocoa@iat.holonet.net    -     voicemail: 415-337-4940   *  *
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: alchemy@cs1.bradley.edu (the termite of temptation)
Subject: old butcher knife America
Summary: cutup, the old fashioned way.
Organization: salt of the earth in open wounds.
Date: 14 Aug 92 18:11:20 GMT

Wausau Sunday Herald, 6/9/91

The men and women of Alameda County confessed to walking 
down historic Constitution Court in Oakland.  Wearing 
ribbons of yellow before the Supremem Red, White, and 
Blue, suspects must be advised over the National Mall.  
In the desert lumbered the Miranda warning.  Battle 
streamers fluttered about what he had done as General
H. Norman was raped by at least 8000 veterans of the
gulf because he did it that way.  President Bush was
awash in flags.  Flags not feeling well that neither
Hammer, wheelchairs, tow trucks, nor potatoes picked up
the knife.  By the time the fireworks filed a counter-
suit she was sitting on park police.  Said that the
woman's home and the aerial show ironed clothes as
accompaniment to an old butcher knife America.  In
America's major denomination hunting knife had used it
as evidence that marital sex is a sign of murder.  Lt.
Spencer Mann was scheduled to tolerate unconventional
sex, Monegar said in the arrest.  Faithful to their
Christian Keberle the Authorities previous lynchpin of
Jesus' message was unrelated to other such debates
under the table.  Two men police called morality by
churches are in custody Christian.  The next miles west
of Gainsville love no righteousness.  Her with my left
arm screamed and fell.  I revived memories of five near
the campus, weekly killings, alleged rape.  Tom says
it's not related to this issue, that makes it worse.
Anne Grace, 20, and a Los Angeles woman, 22, discovered
she was the condominium March 1990.


                                                 in green sun
alchemy@cs1.bradley.edu                          on blue earth
                                                 under warm running showers
From: bhoughto@sedona.intel.com (Blair P. Houghton)
Subject: Re: rictus hep; alive and well
Organization: Intel Corp., Chandler, Arizona
Date: Sun, 16 Aug 1992 19:36:03 GMT

In article <1992Aug15.151610.8298@vax.oxford.ac.uk> reese@vax.oxford.ac.uk writes:
>In article <1992Aug14.180444.12164@ichips.intel.com>, bhoughto@sedona.intel.com (Blair P. Houghton) writes:
>> Magneto ergo rodento.
>> 				  "Why is a mouse when it spins?"
>
>The higher the fewer.
>Now, where does that come from?

You mean "the more the much," and it comes
from the mind of someone farrer bizarre
that any of us.

				--Blair
				  "Subliminal messages notwithstanding."
Xref: sparky talk.bizarre:26018 alt.flame:12071
From: exuptr@exu.ericsson.se (Patrick Taylor)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,alt.flame,alt.tobacco
Subject: Re: The wages of Stupidity are Death
Date: 14 Aug 92 18:13:49 GMT
Organization: Ericsson Network Systems, Inc.

In article <MJD.92Aug14114918@saul.cis.upenn.edu> mjd@saul.

>There is only minimal health risk associated with moderate tobacco use.

>Now if you're going to be sanctimonious and didactic, would you please
>do it somewhere else?  I don't like inhaling your second-hand perorations.

>--

>                And for to see, and eke for to be seye
>Mark-Jason Dominus                                  mjd@central.cis.upenn.edu 

You don't strike me as the smoking type, Dominus.
 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
    "This must be Thursday.  I never could get the hang of Thursdays"
                                                       - D Adams
  - Patrick Taylor
    Ericsson Network Systems
    exuptr@exu.ericsson.se                       "Don't let the .se fool you"
    alternately, exuptr@ZGNews.Lonestar.Org
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: al037@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (Dave Polewka)
Subject: Re: Kibocolliders (was: Re: Super Conducting Supercollider)
Reply-To: al037@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (Dave Polewka)
Organization: Case Western Reserve University, Cleveland, OH (USA)
Date: Sat, 15 Aug 92 05:48:07 GMT


In a previous article, bhoughto@sedona.intel.com (Blair P. Houghton) says:
                       ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

>Feynman says that when a moron decays you get an election
>and two newtkibos,

 bhoughto@sedona.intel.com -- (@=a)
**************************************
  Geo. Bush, in a motel, hot on DAC!
**************************************


-- 
=======================
"Endeavor to persevere"
=======================
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: rwd4f@poe.acc.Virginia.EDU (Rob Dobson)
Subject: Subject Line du Jour
Followup-To: alt.moslem.wanted.gay,alt.alien.visitors
Organization: University of Virginia
Date: Thu, 13 Aug 1992 16:38:34 GMT


Article: 33647 of alt.personals
Newsgroups: alt.personals,alt.personals.ads
From: ap.164@cupid.sai.com
Subject: Every day, in every way I get juicier, juicier and juicier.
         ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

is this Carassogooleyrichh??

does it have an anonymous contact number yet, and will it (hopefully) be
posting responses soon??


Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: rigler@galileo.ifa.hawaii.edu (Michael A. Rigler)
Subject: Re: best in bed
Organization: IFA
Date: Thu, 20 Aug 1992 07:16:06 GMT

Morrisa_Sherman@autodesk.com writes:
>
>Among the men, I would have to definitely say that it isn't nj.  Nope.  
>Not by any stretch of the imagination.  Don't let my satisfied grin fool 
>you; it's an act.  Nor the way I cannot keep my hands off his luscious 
>frame,                                                im.  Really. I 
>can't b                                               t. I just want him 
>for his                 (WOW)                         .  Honest.  He is 
>not in                                                delectable, or 
>magnifi                                                to.  I have been  
>known to go 3 minutes at a time without thinking of him.  He's not worth 
>it. Unh uh.  Nein. Nyet.  You wouldn't like to sleep with him.  He's 
>just my cross to bear, so pity me.

Geez, nj.  After reading this...all these great things Morrisa
wrote about you...I have to be honest.  I'm feeling very jealous...



(...I want you for myself.)

--
Rigler                       Joy and Sorrow are the wings of Yearning
From: EE117@LIVERPOOL.AC.UK
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: BEST IN BED
Date: 21 Aug 92 15:46:44 GMT
Organization: University of Liverpool


>>>oh, and men...no votes for your sisters, please.
>>
>>"What about step-daughters ?"
>>                        - Woody Allen
> "What about mothers?""
>                         - Hamlet
  "Yeah right-on"
                          - Oedipus

-Ian.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
You won't get wise                    +  Ian C. Smith,
With the sleep still in your eyes     +  Department of Elec. Eng.
No matter what your dreams might me   +  University of Liverpool.
 - Rush ( fine purveyors of home-spun +  email:
          philosophy since 1973 )     +    ee117 @ ibm.liv.ac.uk
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: heim@vms.macc.wisc.edu (JOHN HEIM	)
Subject: Re: SWM Seeks SWF
Organization:  University of Wisconsin Academic Computing Center
Date: 13 AUG 92 08:57:24    

In article <p#5m=0m.rdc@netcom.com>, rdc@netcom.com (Roger David Carasso) writes...

>)27 year old male seeks female around same.
> 

..

>)Live at home in sunny Edmonton alberta canada.
> 
>STRKI...FOUL!

Kill the umpire!  He's clearly out.  Anyone who says they "live at 
home" is a loser.  (Either the guy, at 27, still lives with his mother 
or he doesn't realize *everyone* lives at home.)

John G. Heim                                 Email:  heim@macc.wisc.edu

"If there's something wrong with the computer, it's sophisticated diagnostics 
will notify you of the situation by assuming an appearance that, for the most
part, is dark and lifeless." - The Adventures of Lone Wolf Scientific
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: latent fears
From: rmk@rmkhome.UUCP (Rick Kelly)
Organization: The Man With Ten Cats
Date: Thu, 13 Aug 1992 16:43:37 GMT
Reply-To: rmk@rmkhome.UUCP (Rick Kelly)
Keywords: yyeeeeeaaaaahhhh!!!!

In article <1992Aug12.133920.10282@cs.rose-hulman.edu> jdavidso@nextwork.rose-hulman.edu (Jeff Davidson) writes:
>Distribution: world
>
>
>I still have a few bogey men fears left from my childhood. While cabling up a  
>lab for ethernet yesterday, I found myself on a ladder, head up in the false  
>ceiling, arm into a hole in the wall up to the armpit, trying to reach the  
>cable for this bench. I suddenly had the irrational fear that something in  
>there was straining to reach my hand and munch down on it.


That might not be all that irrational.  It's probably where waldby is
spending the summer.

-- 

Rick Kelly	rmk@rmkhome.UUCP	unixland!rmkhome!rmk	rmk@frog.UUCP
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: middle@cse.uta.edu (William J Middleton)
Subject: Re: how i can tell if i'm dreaming
Organization: Computer Science & Engineering, Univ. of Texas at Arlington
Date: Sat, 22 Aug 1992 01:27:43 GMT

In article <1992Aug21.120627.13217@Princeton.EDU> greg@phoenix.Princeton.EDU (Gregory Nowak) writes:
>In article <MJD.92Aug12112327@saul.cis.upenn.edu> mjd@saul.cis.upenn.edu ("[*] Angel of Tar") writes:
>}
>}I realized once that a sure-fire way to tell is:  if you consciously
>}wonder whether or not you're dreaming, or if you think about being in a
>}dream, then you're not dreaming.
>
>}Then I woke up.
>
>
>Whenever I'm having a dream that is boring me or becoming unpleasant,
>I simply lie down wherever I am, no matter what is happening, and go
>to sleep _in_the_dream_. The stack collapses, and there I am sleeping
>peacefully without having ever woken up.
>
>Works like a charm ... but there have been a few difficult moments when I
>applied the algorithm and turned out not to be dreaming.
>

i shall attempt this technique and hope that the realization
occurs after i have fallen asleep.


bILL
thanks in advance 


Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: aaron@space.ualberta.ca (Aaron Humphrey)
Subject: Re: Anagram
Reply-To: aaron@space.ualberta.ca
Organization: University Of Alberta, Edmonton Canada
X-Newsreader: Tin 1.1 PL4
Date: Wed, 12 Aug 1992 17:52:31 GMT

I'm just happy that my eail address has only one "s", and Polewka is thus
unable to anagram it into a phrase containing Carasso.

--
---Alfvaen(a.k.a. Aaron V. Humphrey)
"There's too many clues in this room."  Gordon Lightfoot
Current Album--Bill Cosby:For Adults Only
Current Read--Henry David Thoreau:Walden and Other Writings
From: rpwhite@taurus.cs.nps.navy.mil (rpwhite)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: toast
Date: 20 Aug 92 03:30:44 GMT
Reply-To: rpwhite@cs.nps.navy.mil (rpwhite)
Followup-To: talk.bizarre,alt.cascade,misc.test,alt.test,misc.jobs.offered
Organization: Monterey Bay Yacht Club, Monterey CA

Blair writes:

>>>Currants.
>>Currency.
>Crabalocker Fishwife.
Coxswain.

rp -- my cerebellum churns ceaselessly.
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: gypsy@alembic.acs.com (hippolyte)
Subject: in the backyard
Organization: the church of the latter-day polish amazons
Date: Fri, 14 Aug 1992 06:44:24 GMT



i was out in the backyard watching the
landscape guy adding chlorine to the
gene pool.  he had a cute butt, so i
pushed him in.

m
-- 
"...at night they lurk outside the tall barrier staring with curious
 wild eyes into the flat field, feeling cheated." -- Beryl Markham
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: PJF4081@cc.utah.edu (that's mr. wonderful to you)
Subject: screwing
Summary: screwing
Keywords: more screwing
Reply-To: mr. wonderful
Organization: committee for the advancement of disgust
Date: Thu, 20 Aug 92 10:49:50 MDT
X-News-Reader: VMS NEWS 1.10



	when i just now saw alt.sewing i thought it said alt screwing.
	i quickly realised my mistake but i thought i would post something
	about screwing anyway. then i remembered my sys admin. oh well.


()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()(
	PJF---->Biochem. grad student. "suffering *is* my game.		
	  	            WORK  :==  FUTURE
	"i am involved in the petty business of scientific research."
                         "feel free to feel me."
\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: gary@sci34hub.sci.com (Gary Heston)
Subject: Re: Do you people have jobs?
Reply-To: gary@sci34hub.sci.com (Gary Heston)
Organization: SCI Systems, Inc., Huntsville, Al.
Date: Sun, 23 Aug 1992 00:17:00 GMT

In article <BszHFx.MJ@news.larc.nasa.gov> fuhrmann@avd20.larc.nasa.gov (Henri D. Fuhrmann) writes:
>Hhmm ?


Yeah. Do you, or do you just draw a paycheck on my tax dollars?

(In case you're wondering, I'm logged in from home.)


-- 
Gary Heston    SCI Systems, Inc.  gary@sci34hub.sci.com   site admin
The Chairman of the Board and the CFO speak for SCI. I'm neither.
Hestons' First Law: I qualify virtually everything I say.
From: sho@gibbs.physics.purdue.edu (Sho Kuwamoto)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Piece of wood
Date: 19 Aug 92 03:03:59 GMT
Organization: Purdue University Physics Department

I remember when times were easy.  I remember when all I
wanted in life was a piece of wood.  

Trees were smaller then.  Most trees were no larger than
your fist.  Some were as small as your big toe.  But we
called those saplings, even if they were fully mature.

I was very much in love with someone, or something.  I
forget the details.  My love and I would run around the
world trying to find a good piece of wood.  I remember that
much.

I remember one day in particular.  We were headed up to a
campsite by Lake Harris when the car ran out of gas.  My
love (whoever or whatever it was) said to me, "God wants us
to push this car off the side of this road.  God wants us to
watch it tumble down the mountainside."  We did just that.
We watched the car tumble.

In those days, it didn't matter.  It didn't matter if you
threw your car down the side of a mountain.  But now that
the trees are big, you have to double-check every action,
just to make sure it's safe.

-Sho
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre