HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: slv@camembert.cs.wisc.edu (Scott L. Vandenberg)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Self-serve gas stations
Date: 24 Jul 92 19:28:34 GMT
Organization: UW-Madison Computer Sciences

I've recently had several peevesome experiences at self-serve gas
(petrol) stations.  The following list is partial, as a complete list
of all the idiots and idiocies encountered at such establishments would
be prohibitively long.

PEEVE 1:  "You're all criminals, so pay before pumping the gas".  I
guess I understand this to an extent, but it's still a little insulting.
It becomes truly peevesome, however, when one pays via credit card.
This entails waiting in line twice, once to give them the credit card
and once to retrieve it and sign the slip.  Invariably one is stuck
behind a family of 12 with all their sniveling brats, each of whom
feels obligated to pay separately for his/her favorite little bag
of candy or potato chips.

Eons later one finally has the inestimable
privilege of giving up one's credit card to a complete (and usually
slimy-looking) stranger to hold.  This is unsettling.  A similar
delay occurs when re-entering the station to complete the transaction.

PEEVE 2:  This one really pisses me off.  In the good old days (or
maybe it's the "good old places", a.k.a. not the US East Coast) one
was able to pump one's gas and do something constructive while the
tank filled, like wash the windows or check the oil or make out with the
girlfriend.  In these enlightened times (places?) however, we have all
clearly become much too stupid to handle the immense responsibility of
hooking the little piece of metal on the gas pump handle into the slot
to keep it in the "on" position.  God knows I always sweated bullets
from the pressure this placed on my fragile psyche.  I'm so relieved
now that I can stand there and smell the fruits of my labor (i.e.
inhale cancerous fumes) and not have to worry about the gas pump when
I wash my window and check my oil and make out with my wife (yes, we
got married while I was waiting to give up my credit card -- had plenty
of time to spare, too).

In short, why the hell do we have to stand there and hold the damn
handle?  Why have they disabled the mechanism used to keep it pumping?
I can only assume that it's another facet of the crusade to protect
us from ourselves, but if you can't handle that mechanism you don't
belong behind the wheel of a car.  So there.
From: carolo@cse.ucsc.edu (Carol Osterbrock)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Nattering Twits who have No Respect For Alums
Date: 22 Jul 92 05:16:27 GMT
Organization: University of California, Santa Cruz (CE/CIS Boards)
NNTP-Posting-Host: arapaho.ucsc.edu

In article <1992Jul21.211426.12431@wetware.com> drieux@wetware.com (drieux, just drieux) writes:

[...]

>We need not address here that UC Santa Cruz should be considered
>as a wilderness preserve for the SocialRejectsAndMorallyDestitute
>of society who will most likely Never be able to take up Productive
>and Responsible Jobs and thus have meaningful Lives in the ever
>expanding eternally significant all knwoing and all wise Market Place
>of Economic advantages and Progess; and therein NEED far More Stern 
>Protective and Parental Guidance as they fumble their ways through LIFE.

Well, dammit, drieux, they are paving over our wilderness preserve!
And also, I don't think that it is only those who never take up
productive and responsible jobs who are able to have meaningful
lives.  I know a UCSC alumnus who is now a technical writer (and
what could be more productive than that?), who still manages to
have a meaningful life.

[...]

>For Shame! For Shame! For Shame!!!!!

>And Should Your Frivolity Continue to Corrupt the Educational system
>I will forth with be morally obliged to make no more further donations
>to the educational system.

Uh oh, does this mean I don't get any more cigarettes?

Bummer.

>ciao
>drieux

chow
-carolo
-- 
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Carol Osterbrock       *       Such a long, long time to be gone
carolo@cse.ucsc.edu    *         And a short time to be there...
===============================================================================
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: alex@vmars.tuwien.ac.at (Alexander Vrchoticky)
Subject: Re: Chimpanzees/Olympic Games
Organization: Technical University Vienna, Dept. for Realtime Systems, AUSTRIA
Date: Fri, 31 Jul 1992 16:03:23 GMT

>ObOlympicPeeve: Do we really need a nightly hour long wrap up on the
>highlights of the day for the Norwegian Olympic team?  

no, we don't. fortunately we don't get it, either. :-)

unrelated peeve: you know the feeling when you are hungry, and you 
bought some stuff to cook, and the only thing that stands between you 
and your filled stomach is a sink full of dirty dishes? 
then you know what i'm in for tonight. groan.

anti-peeve: if i get moving *right* *now*, i will make it in time
to see `london kills me' in the movies. having read kureishi's book 
`the buddha of suburbia' really did whet my appetite for that one. 

-alex

-- 
Alexander Vrchoticky             alex@vmars.tuwien.ac.at
TU Vienna, CS/Real-Time Systems  +43/1/58801-8168
Organization: Sloppy, little to none
Date: Sun, 26 Jul 1992 22:31:37 EDT
From: Joy Haftel <JKH107@psuvm.psu.edu>
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Oh, and one more ...

In article <92205.190543JMS111@psuvm.psu.edu>, Jenni Sheehey
<JMS111@psuvm.psu.edu> says:
>
>Peeve: It's been a long week.  I need a beer.
>
>!Peeve: I have a beer.
>
>Peeve: it's at home, and I have to be here for three more hours yet.

Peeve:  it was probably *my* beer.
(Yuengling Porter, eh?  You don't say...)

Peeve:  living in a "dry" household again.

Peeve:  taking out seven people's trash.

Peeve: these stupid commentaries on the Olympics.  Since 3/4 of
the air time (12 hours today) is the inane babbling of the network
people, you never see what you really want to (which in this case
happens to be a movie I rented today).

Peeve:  damp weather.  Here, there are mushrooms growing on the
yard, in the trash cans, and I expect to see them growing on
my feet soon.

!Peeve:  Old movies, cold beer, gainful employment, finally finding
a way to connect through a local call, and my SO coming to visit me
next weekend.

Joy Haftel               "`I happy am,
JKH107@PSUVM              Joy is my name.'
                          Sweet joy befall thee!"--Blake
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: nolan@lurch.twg.com (Nolan Hinshaw)
Subject: Re: radio stuff
Reply-To: nolan@twg.com
Organization: Somewhere West of Nowhere
Distribution: na
Date: Mon, 27 Jul 1992 17:11:04 GMT


In article <35831@sdcc12.ucsd.edu>, kprashan@sdcc3.ucsd.edu (hyderabadi) 
complained eloquently about the practices of commercial radio stations.

In article <1992Jul21.230155.22123@twg.com> nolan@twg.com I brought out the
  munitions and responded: 

        LargePeeve: Whiners going on and on about discretionary activities
        like listening to the radio. GET A CLUE! Don't listen to those
        stations if they bother you! Change the station, or turn the bleedin'
        thing off.

	Nolan "Grandpa Grumble" Hinshaw

In article <14irqjINNbu5@darkstar.UCSC.EDU>, carolo@cse.ucsc.edu 
(Carol Osterbrock) provided the catch:

        Ah, but this is not always possible.  I had lunch the other day in a
        restaurant that was playing some San Jose station which played "all
        the songs you haven't heard in *years*".  Well, if I'd wanted to hear
        those songs, I would have listened to them at least once in the last
        20 years.  It was almost funny by the end of lunch, because it was all
        the songs that have been posted on alt.peeves that really annoy you
        but you can't get them out of your head.  Well, if they play 20 of
        them in a row ("NO commercial interruptions!"), they cancel each other
        out, and you end up with the memory of a very unpleasant experience,
        but no one truly awful song bouncing through your head all afternoon.

	carol "next time it's carry-out" o

Well! You got me there, Sluggo.  I, of course, tend to avoid places that
inflict that sort of torture on the patrons, unless the food is exceptional or
there's some other major incentive to patronize the establishment. There's one
cafe with an outstanding weekend menu (no, I ain't gonna publish the
name of the place - don't wanna ruin things) I frequent that tunes a
commercial station with an ecclectic playlist. One hears The Doors alongside
The Coasters and other such amalgams of musical endeavor. Tends to flush the
mind of any particular melodic hangup. 

I still maintain however that much of the auditory pollution we the people
encounter is in fact discretionary and if we don't like it we needn't inflict
it upon ourselves. We frequently have the option of turning it off or staying
away from places that play the stuff. Taking charge and avoiding such stuff is
much more effective, albeit less emotionally satisfying, than complaining.

--
Nolan "Abstains from commercial broadcast media" Hinshaw
Internet: nolan@twg.com			Dingalingnet: (415)962-7197	
"... necrophilia doesn't really hurt anybody."  Rick Gordon

Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: senetza@xi.uleth.ca (Len Senetza)
Subject: Re: Sheepdog Bogroll
Organization: University of Lethbridge
Date: 27 Jul 92 14:57:38 GMT

In <6PDeoB2w165w@wabwrld.UUCP> bill@wabwrld.UUCP (Adjunct Scrutinizer) writes:
>Where the hell is Sheepdog Bogroll?  You'd figure he'd have found net 
>access already.  Perhaps he's saving his peeves up.

From what I remember (talking to him last month), he may well be in Hong Kong
by now.  And from then on, who knows.  I wouldn't expect to see/hear from him
for a year or two.
--
  +-----------------------------------------------------------------------+
  |  Leonard Senetza            |  E-Mail: senetza@alpha.uleth.ca         |
  |  Academic Consultant        |          senetza@hg.uleth.ca            |
  |  University of Lethbridge   |   Phone: 403-329-5162 FAX: 403-382-7108 |
  |  Lethbridge, Alberta        |-----------------------------------------|
  |  Canada, eh?                |  Disclaimer: Why should I tell _them_?  |
  |  T1K 3M4                    |    What they don't know, can't fire me. |
  +-----------------------------------------------------------------------+
From: tjc@castle.ed.ac.uk (A J Cunningham)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: drug testing, welfare, and screaming kids...
Date: 30 Jul 92 10:36:26 GMT
Distribution: alt
Organization: Edinburgh University Colouring Book Software

fofp@castle.ed.ac.uk (M Holmes) writes:

>Peeve: I have no kids, but I gotta pay taxes to help out rich brats.

Peeve: I don't go to University but I have to pay taxes to help out
people like Holmes.

FollowupPeeve: Begging letters from my old University. Despite moving
several times since graduation I'm still subjected to a series of
letters from The Edinburgh University Development Fund asking for my
cash. Obviously Mike and his cronies aren't being kept in the luxury
they're accustomed to by my tax donations and they would like some more
money. Previously when I worked for the University these letters just
went back with a note explaining that I'd *love* to make a donation and
as soon as the university started paying me a decent wage I would. Now
that excuse doesn't work. I think I'll start writing to the University
explaining that my flat needs new furniture or I want to buy some more
books or I need a new computer and ask them for a donation.
Alternatively I may cover my tracks better next time I move.
T

-- 
Tony Cunningham, Insignia Solutions. 				   tjc@ed.ac.uk

Yes, I carry a grudge. If someone pokes me in the eye, I'll poke both of
their eyes. larry@psl.nmsu.edu (Larry Cunningham)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: sek@cbnews.cb.att.com (stephanie.e.kearns)
Subject: A few vacation peeves (longish)
Organization: AT&T
Distribution: usa
Date: Fri, 24 Jul 1992 19:03:04 GMT
Keywords: rental cars, toothless grins, lost in San Francisco


Having just returned from 2 1/2 weeks in California, I accumulated a small 
stash of peeves.  

1.  We rented a Taurus - actually not a bad car (for two weeks).  Except,
come time to get
our first tankful of gas, we couldn't get the gas cover off to get to the
filler.  Now this was really embarrassing.  We were at a self-service
station (way up in Live Oak, CA - a very rural community), and running
around looking for levers or buttons or crowbars or anything to open it
with.  (We had sent the mother-in-law in to pay for $10.00 on pump one).
While my husband and I were sweatily panicking  (it was about 100 degrees out), and running around the
car like fools, quite a line was accumulating behind us.  Guess others
wanted gas, too.  

Finally I stuck my head in the window of the pickup truck behind me (actually
they were smiling while watching us) and said did he have ANY idea where
we might find the magic button for the gas cap?  (Of course, the car didn't
come with an owner's manual)  He suggested looking in the glove compartment, and
gave me a big toothless grin. Voila!   Two buttons.  The first threw the trunk 
open.  The second hit paydirt.  

Since that problem was solved, I headed in to the store for something - passed
the mother in law on her way out waving some sort of card at me.  I said,
oh give it to Bill (my husband) - he'll know what to do with it.

Apparently the card is slid through the gas machine, and it automatically sets
the $ amount.  See, here on the East Coast we don't have anything like that
yet.  So I guess while I was in the store quite a commotion occured because
us fool tourists didn't even know how to work the pumps once we figured out
how to get to the gas tank!

Actually, it turned out to be really funny.  We were kind of peeved at the time,
but everyone else seemed to get a real kick out of it - there were about five
people around my poor husband when I came back out laughing at/with him.

2.  I didn't buy something I saw on Fisherman's Wharf (that place is a
a whole peeve in itself-
does anybody really go there except tourists?  We only went for nostalgia -
we used to live out there)  Now I can't find what I didn't buy anywhere else,
and I'm kicking
myself for not buying it...

3.  Having a map of how to get to a city, but not one of how to get around once
you're there.  We were kind of relying on memory, but twelve years makes one
forget a lot.

4.  Related to Peeve 3 - On our one part of the vacation without the
children we spent about 10 hours driving and 3 hours in San Francisco.
(It's only a ~2 hr. drive from where we were staying)

5.  Vacations have to end, and goodbyes said to family.  You people would
love my kids - they didn't cry on the plane, they cried all the way to
the airport...

Stephanie


Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: slv@cs.wisc.edu (Scott L. Vandenberg)
Subject: Re: Self-serve gas stations
Organization: UW-Madison Computer Sciences
Date: Mon, 27 Jul 1992 16:08:03 GMT

In article <8jkm2vp@lynx.unm.edu>, hillman@carina.unm.edu (Dan Hillman) writes:
|> In article <1992Jul24.192834.23276@spool.cs.wisc.edu> slv@camembert.cs.wisc.edu
|> (Scott L. Vandenberg) writes:
|> >
|> >PEEVE 1:  "You're all criminals, so pay before pumping the gas".  
|> 
|> What really yanks my crank is when places don't have some sort of sign
|> indicating whether one is supposed to pay first, pump first, or make

Yes, that was actually another peeve that I didn't have time to include.
Here's another related one:

NEW SELF-SERVE GAS STATION PEEVE:
	Employees of self-serve gas stations who stand in front of the sign
	reading "please pay first".  This moron was standing there watching
	me while I tried to get the damn pump to work (I had looked 
	carefully for such a sign and didn't see one).  The sad thing was 
	that this BDI employee wasn't even smart enough to be doing this
	as a practical joke (I could have partially understood such 
	behavior) but was simply so clueless as to not realize that he was
	blocking the sign.  Duh.
 
|> Jesus, man, have the wife check the oil and wash the windows! 

We usually do make a team effort out of it, but it flowed better without
mentioning that.  Besides, I frequently go to gas stations solo.
 
|> >In short, why the hell do we have to stand there and hold the damn
|> >handle?  Why have they disabled the mechanism used to keep it pumping?
|> 
|> It's a method used to differentiate between BDIs and People-Who-Think-
|> Of-Using-Their-Gas-Cap-To-Hold-The-Handle-Up-While-They-Do-Something-
|> More-Meaningful-With-Their-Lives. Guess which one *you* are.

Careful, Dan!  I figured that trick out over a decade ago, and I hate BDIs
as much as the next peever (as anyone who's seen me drive in Massachusetts
can tell you).  But one of my cars (the brand-new one) has a gas cap that's 
attached to the car by a cord and so doesn't reach the pump handle.  I've been 
reluctant to cut it because (1) I don't feel like mutilating a brand-new car just
because idiot gas stations don't provide the right equipment and (2) it's more fun
to rant and rave and (3) (almost as important as ranting and raving) I don't
trust all other drivers of said car not to lose the gas cap.

Next time I'll just borrow the gas cap off the BDI employee's car.  I suppose
I could just carry something else in the car to serve the same purpose but that
would be too easy.
From: booter@Autodesk.COM (Elaine Richards)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Male bonding
Date: 30 Jul 92 18:54:43 GMT
Organization: Autodesk, Inc., Sausalito, CA

In article <1992Jul29.171016.12169@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> bberbeni@nyx.cs.du.edu (Bill Berbenich) writes:
>Peeve:  This whole "male bonding" pop-psych thing.  What the Hell is it about
>        some women who figure that just because I like drinking beer with and
>        playing sports (like bowling and golf :) with my male buddies, that
>        also means I want to tie them up with leather or handcuffs (or
>        whatever)?



If I were you, I would check which color hanky is in which back pocket.

ER

--
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
I don't know when it was that I scratched Fate's car door, but I should have
left a note. --Tim Mefford

Xref: sparky alt.peeves:12549 alt.flame:11403
From: ataylor@nmsu.edu (Nosy)
Subject: Re: Another Enema Zoo Blunder (Was: Self-serve gas stations)
Organization: NMSU Computer Science
	<ATAYLOR.92Jul29103407@gauss.nmsu.edu>
	<LARRY.92Jul29130440@peak.psl.nmsu.edu>
Date: Thu, 30 Jul 1992 16:33:11 GMT

<In article <LARRY.92Jul29130440@peak.psl.nmsu.edu> larry@peak.psl.nmsu.edu (Evil Engineer doin' it the Cowboy Way) writes:
<   In article <ATAYLOR.92Jul29103407@gauss.nmsu.edu> ataylor@nmsu.edu (Nosy) writes:
<	      I note that SOMEONE (not me...) took a spray can to
<	      the building that Parking lives in....the slogan
<	      "F*CK THE PARKING DEPT.", while not very original,
<	      is quite pithy and au courant.

<   Actually, I believe what is says on the side of the building, Alan,
<   is:
<		       PIGS
<	   fuck the 
<		  Parking

<   And on the door:

<	      FUCK YOU!
	      =========

<   In dark BLUE (couldn't ya find red, Nosy?)

	Hmmm? Considering that you seem much better informed
	than I on the issue of the exact wording of said 
	vandalistic graffitti....who is the proper suspect,
	here?

<	       Stick around (like you have a choice, with that crummy
<	       airconditioning in the New PSL-East Annex....); 

<   Having not experienced it yet, I wouldn't know.

	Huh? Din't you brag about having an orifice that
	overlooks the park? Ain't you in "the last room on
	the left"?

ObScaryThought: Larry may have finally gotten a serial
	 	drop in one of the bathroom stalls...enabling
		him to read/post Peeves from "home away from
		home".

<	       the Legislature may well decide that since Enema Zoo 
<	       is collecting all those bucks for parking, the general 
,	       appropriation for this place can just be cut by 
<	       exactly the same amount....
<
<   It'll be $50 or $100 soon.

	Not for staff, it won't....
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: yarvin@highlite.uucp (Curtis Yarvin)
Subject: Re: Drug testing and welfare
Organization: Gotham Communications Research
Date: Wed, 29 Jul 1992 05:27:09 GMT

In article <1992Jul27.184207.1@husky1.stmarys.ca> cs226a030@husky1.stmarys.ca writes:
>
>The truth is, some druge are *highly* addictive (cocaine and crack) for
>example. And whether or not someone wants to do something illegal is
>irrelevant. Illegal is illegal.

Dimwit.

You wouldn't happen to be American, would you?  It's odd to see a Canadian
spouting fascist propaganda a la Jesse Helms.  When real Canucks wax foolish,
they tend toward the mealy-mouthed and socialist.

For your information, sheep, cocaine and crack _aren't_ addictive.  True,
they're fun; or "psychologically addictive," as the Goebbels groupies put
it.  So are bungee jumping, Ferraris, gumbo, and sex.  Whatcha going to
do about them, you putrefied reincarnation of Cotton Mather you?

c
Newsgroups: alt.peeves,alt.usage.english
From: Tom Christiansen <tchrist@convex.COM>
Subject: Re: The End of a Thread
Originator: tchrist@convex.convex.com
Reply-To: tchrist@convex.COM (Tom Christiansen)
Organization: CONVEX Realtime Development, Colorado Springs, CO
Date: Thu, 30 Jul 1992 16:33:47 GMT
X-Disclaimer: This message was written by a user at CONVEX Computer
              Corp. The opinions expressed are those of the user and
              not necessarily those of CONVEX.

From the keyboard of drieux@wetware.com (drieux, just drieux):
:bberbeni@nyx.cs.du.edu(BillBerbenich)Writes:
:TheHitleriteNazioThreadIcusUnRavlicusEffectum
:IBelieveIsTheWordYouWereLookingFor.
:OnceUponATimeBeforeTheGreatMentalIceAgeOfThePureBredPolitikalKorrektNess
:KonversersPersonsWereAbleToMakeMeaningfulAssertionsAboutTheNatureOfTheHi
:tlerite/FascistMovementAndItsImpactOnMassKulturAndTheRegulationOfAWellOR
:DEREDSociety.ButAsThatEraOfMeaningAndSignificanceCrumbledBeforeTheOnslau
:ghtOfTheMassMediaMongers,ModernSeXularHumanistBootLikkingLakkiesOfTheEur
:oDisneyKonspiraky,AndTheirRedMenaceStooges,TheAbilityToSpeakSignificantl
:yAboutTheHorrorsOfTheOnceDangerousAndFeared,DreadedKentralIzedGovernment
:AndMassKulturKontrolledByKorrektnessKeepersHasWainedInItsUtility.ThisHas
:LeadToTheClarificationOfThisMoralKollapseAsTheHitleriteNazioThreadIcusUn
:RavlicusEffectum

:ps:BroughtToYouAsAnotherPublicServiceOn 
:behalfOfThoseForCorrectWordUsage.

Poor thing -- incurably damaged by X11 programming, no doubt.

--tom
-- 
"GUIs normally make it simple to accomplish simple actions and impossible
to accomplish complex actions."   --Doug Gwyn  (22/Jun/91 in comp.unix.wizards)

     Tom Christiansen           tchrist@convex.com      convex!tchrist