From: kzim@watserv.ucr.edu (Christopher Robin Zimmerman)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.pro-wrestling
Subject: WWF Prime Time Wrestling - 2/11/92
Keywords: Is it sweeps month yet?
Date: 4 Nov 92 21:14:23 GMT

Due to high wind knocking out our network, I had to wait until now to post  
this week's Prime Time.  I know you were all waiting with baited breath.

Prime Time Wrestling, shown on the USA Television Network 2.11.92

No credits.

Razor Ramon v. ***EL*** Matador (Commentators Gorilla Monsoon, Lord Alfred  
Hayes)  Ramon chucks the toothpick at Santana, who promptly controls the  
match.  It's fun seeing Ramon drop the elbow three times in a row, miss all  
three, but suffer no pain.  Monsoon refers to Ramon's garb as "the Mr. T  
starter kit."  Ramon manages to turn the tide by introducing Santana's neck  
to the rope.  Ramon controls for awhile until Tito blatantly cheats, climbing  
down Razor's back, grabbing the trunks, and converting into a sunset flip for  
2.  Santana controls the match until he attempts a monkey flip out of the  
corner but forgets Ramon.  Razor quickly applies "the Razor's Edge" and  
Santana sells it very poorly.

The "Panel of Experts" includes Hillbilly Jim, Hacksaw Jim Duggan (ICOPRO  
tank), Vince McMahon, Bobby the Brain Heenan, and Mr. Perfect.  Vince  
mentions that Sean Mooney is on honeymoon.  Heenan: "Is he bored?"  Vince:  
"What, on his honeymoon?"  Heenan: "Well, SHE must be bored!"

"Slam Jam coming January 9th."  What is it?  Why should we mark our  
calendars?  I don't know, and the onscreen graphic says nothing.

Nailz v. Tom Stone (Monsoon, Bobby Heenan)  What a pleasure!  A three week  
old syndie match!

Rick Martel (sailor suit, pipe, no feathers) v. Jumpin' Jim Brunzell  
(Monsoon, Hayes)  "Definitely smooth sailing for the Model," sayeth Rick.   
"Brunzie" looks like he's been eating well from that fine jobber salary Vince  
pays him.  Martel, though, is a proponent of ICOPRO.  Monsoon mentions a  
Tatanka/Model matchup at SS and for an encore mentions the feathers.  Since  
Martel hasn't worn them since before SummerSlam, you think he'll bring them  
to Survivor Series, *just by coincidence*?  Brunzell looks worse than normal,  
although he does get his flurry, "phenomenal drop kick," and 2 count before  
Martel applies the Boston Crab.

"Courtesy WWF Superstars:  2 weeks ago"  For the second week, we are blessed  
with "Mean" Gene Okerlund interviewing the Ultimate Madness.  I just noticed  
this time around that when the Ultimate Warrior comes out Savage extends the  
hand but the Warrior doesn't notice.  I'm sure this was unintentional, but  
I'll bet they use it when the team splits.  Also, I was mistaken last week:   
Savage does not say "Oy vey."

Crush v. Ken Johnson (Monsoon, Hayes)  Johnson offers his LEFT hand.   
Obviously, a Boy Scout.  (Canadian joke avoided)  Crush shakes, and Johnson  
kicks several times, but little does he know that Crush is IMPERVIOUS TO  
PAIN.  Inset interview with Bruddah Crush, who talks about the SS main event  
for some reason.  I guess he's not going to Richfield.  After every single  
move, Crush turns to the crowd and does that "hang loose" hand signal.  Crush  
wins with what I voted as 1992's dumbest finishing move.

Hillbilly Jim plugs six new (cheap) WWF tapes.  And from "the WWF's Hottest  
Matches" is Roddy Piper and the Bushwhackers v. Da Mountie and the Nasty Boys  
(Sean Mooney, Hayes).  They only show the middle of the match, which means  
Butch gets pummeled.  Look how chummy Jimmy Hart is with the Nasty Boys, now  
THOSE were the good old days.  Doesn't showing clips like this make the marks  
go, "Gee, where *is* Hot Rod nowadays?"

Heenan interrupts Jim:  "Speaking of tapes, you know that great tape, "Connie  
Does Dallas?"  Well, they're going to release a new one from Mooney's  
honeymoon:  "Sean Mooney Does Nothing."  I'm telling ya, it's Mooney v.  
Heenan at WrestleMania.

Okerlund with the Survivor Series Report.  Hart/Michaels for the Title.   
Coffin match.  We visit the Undertaker's farm (well, a barn anyway)  Stuffed  
raven.  Paul Bearer goes on and on about something, and UT is dragging a  
piece of metal across some wood with his good arm.  He looks like he just  
stepped out of the shower.  New matches:  Tatanka/Model.  Coal Miner's  
Nightstick match with Nailz and the Big Boss Man.  Shouting by BBM.  Main  
Event.  Ultimate Madness interview:  UW is *weird*, Savage is slightly less  
weird.

Shawn Michaels v. Anonymous HNE (Vince McMahon, Mr. Perfect)  Quick inset  
interview.  Michaels is gonna win the title, yeah, yeah.  The reason they get  
this interview out of the way is that before the match even starts, some guy  
in a Guns and Roses T shirt, funny pants, and funny boots comes out of the  
crowd.  Since he is not stopped by security, it must be an angle, and sure  
enough, it's good old Marty Janetty.  "After all these weeks," Janetty's back  
to extract revenge, which makes him a face.  He ends up breaking Shawn's  
heart shaped mirror over Sherri, who find herself involuntarily intervening  
on Shawn's behalf.  Janetty does a bad UW impression, by the way.  Was that  
Marty mouthing "Turn the fuck around!"?  By the way, this is the second  
mirror Shawn has lost this year:  On PrimeTime this summer in the Texas  
Tornado's last televised match, Michaels landed on the mirror and sliced up  
his back but still managed to win by countout thanks to Sherri.

Panel discusses Janetty.  Vince wonders aloud if maybe this wasn't some sort  
of trick by Heenan and Perfect to keep the WWF Title in Hart's hands so Flair  
could win it back from him and not Michaels.  I think he's giving them too  
much credit.  McMahon then asks how Flair's middle ear is.  Hmmmm...two weeks  
in a row with the ear.

All right!  More from Sean's Honeymoon!  This was again the highlight of the  
week.  Sean:  "Sweetheart?  Feeling any better?  Still have that nasty  
headache?  Honey, I got you some aspirin, some ibuprofen...YOU!  I threw you  
guys out of here a week ago!  Don't you have any decency?  Hey wait a minute,  
where's my wife?  YOU LOCKED HER IN THE CLOSET?!?  Oh that's it, you  
sonuva...mm.ugg..grr..."  Sean punches the camera and we see snow.

Promos:  ICOPRO, WWF Figures, Electronic Hot Shot Basketball

Tatanka v. Kamala (Monsoon, Hayes)  Kamala with the first attack, Tatanka  
with boring hold, Kamala chop, but Tatanka gets to hit Kamala until he  
finally falls to the canvas.  Monsoon wants a literal translation of "Kim  
Chee," meaning he doesn't read r.s.p-w.  They seem to be playing up Kim Chee  
in this match, making Kamala's "listening" to him more exaggerated.  I guess  
before it didn't seem like he had a purpose, which, well, he didn't.  Bear  
hug, Tatanka gets out of it setting up a "nerve hold."  Again Tatanka gets  
out, punches five times, and chops off the top rope. Now I'm starting to  
wonder when Paul Bearer will come out with the empty coffin.  Right on cue,  
out he comes, and Kamala sees it.  Ha ha ha!  But wait...Kim Chee manages to  
convince Kamala he has no need to fear an empty coffin and gets him back in  
the ring.  Heat machine is chanting "Rest in peace...rest in peace..."   
Kamala can't get his eyes off the coffin, though.  Finally, Bearer opens it,  
and *boing!* up pops the Undertaker-in-the-Box.  Kamala does his SECOND funny  
flee and Tatanka stays undefeated by virtue of a countout.  "But he would've  
won anyway....." RIGHT.

Vince tells us that Money, Inc. are the new tag team champions.  How  
convenient, tell us the winner before you show us the match!  I mean, I knew  
anyway, but still...

Money, Incorporated v. Natural Disasters (Monsoon, Heenan)  Before IRS gets  
to berate the crowd, out come Brian Knobbs and Jerry Sags.  DiBiase greases  
the palm with thousands of dollars, which the Nasty Boys eventually accept.   
Then they attack anyway.  Crowd cheers.  DiBiase is left on the canvas while  
IRS is outside holding his leg.  Out come the Natural Disasters, all  
business.  Illegal double team on DiBiase.  Illegal double splash.  Ref tries  
to stop a SECOND illegal double splash, but is unsuccessful.  No Slaughter  
anywhere.  Finally Earthquake leaves.  As Typhoon bounces against the rope,  
IRS manages to pull out the legs.  With quick tags, the tide turns against  
Typhoon.  Unfortunately, IRS tries to suplex Typhoon.  This doesn't work.   
IRS manages to tag, but not before Typhoon tags.  Earthquake does the house  
afire bit but before the Quake, the "Headshrinkers," wearing modified  
Demolition outfits, come out.  Of course, the Natural Disasters are stupid  
and pay attention to them.  So does the ref.  IRS comes out, picks up the  
Million Dollar Man, and together they slam Earthquake, resulting in his head  
hitting the steel railing seperating the crowd from the ring.

Stop the tape!  "Direct" from <no call letters> are the Natural Disasters,  
Money Inc. and Jimmy Hart.  Vince wants to know why the Samoans were there.   
Of course, no one knows, but the Disasters have a feeling Jimmy Hart might  
know.  Hart has some unkind words for his former team.

Back to the match:  Three sleepers + one Million Dollar Dream = new champs.   
Why didn't Typhoon run in and help?  For that matter, why didn't Earthquake  
just get counted out to keep the belt?  After all the times he's seen other  
teams do that, why did he do a stupid turn at the last minute?  Must be  
*SLAUGHTER'S* influence.  Just kidding.  I was pleased, though, to actually  
see a wrestler's hand fall three times.

Stop tape again.  Earthquake blames everything on the Headshrinkers instead  
of himself.  DiBiase points out that it was a pretty clean win, and I'm  
inclined to agree.  Natural Disasters predict that they will be champs again.

Back to the tape again, Jimmy Hart has joined Heenan and Monsoon on the  
announcers' stage.  Out come the Nice Guys who throw Heenan off the platform  
and hand him his chair afterwards.  Hart gets grilled, claiming he "sold them  
out."  Out comes Money, Inc. in time to see Hart in a pit stop.  Finally,  
Hart is thrown on top of DiBiase and IRS.

Earthquake predicts that the next championship match will result in a title  
change.  Hart says the "Fat Busters" will NEVER get another title shot as  
long as he controls the team controlling the belt, and also pleads for Jack  
Tunney to suspend his own team, the Nasty Boys.  Hart then went on to say  
that were it not for Okerlund, Monsoon, and McMahon there wouldn't even BE a  
fued.  I guess he's partially right.

"What is 6 foot 4, 425 pounds, and burning fire?!  What?!?  WHAT?!?!  BAM BAM  
BIGELOW!! THAT'S WHAT!!"

British Bulldog v. Louie Spiccoli (Monsoon, Heenan)  "Obviously, [Smith is] a  
very strong proponent of ICOPRO!"  Yep, there's a clown in the audience.   
Inset interview with Smith congradulating Bret Hart for winning the WWF  
Title.  Boy, that clown looks goofy.  Smith with predictable moves and win  
and unpredictable ICOPRO sell to the camera after the match.

Special Report with Lord Alfred Hayes, sponsored by six new WWF tapes.  Last  
week's Nailz/UT staredown is shown without additional comment.

Panel discusses Survivor Series.

Max Moon v. Repo Man (Monsoon, Hayes)  Repo was playing the crowd pretty  
well.  Monsoon announced during this match that the Bushwhackers had stepped  
aside in favor of the Nice Guys.  Man, was this match boring.  Repo get a  
nice move catching Moon when he attempted to leap over him and instead  
dropping his neck on the rope.  For being as new as he is, Moon didn't show a  
push, winning only by DQ after Repo went to the hook.

Yokozuna v. Bill Jordan (McMahon, Perfect)  This week, it is Yokozuna  
carrying the Japanese flag.  This week we *do* get to see that belly to belly  
suplex I was craving, and it *was* funny.  Yokozuna sounds a lot like the  
"Karate Champ" video game of a couple years back ("Hyaah!")  Oh, he wins.

Promos:  GI Joe, Electronic Talking Battleship ("Yeah!"), George Foreman  
Knockout Boxing cartridges

Next week:  Money, Inc. defends the belts against High Energy (well, I guess  
that's one Earthquake prediction down the drain), Bret Hart defends the WWF  
title against The Berzerker (!).  Heenan predicts a Berzerker win, and  
Perfect mutters that that could "ruin Plan C."

No Jamison.  

Christopher Zimmerman 
  / kzim@watserv.ucr.edu / kzim@ucrmath.ucr.edu / zimmerma@ucrengr.ucr.edu /