HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: allane@earth.gas.unsw.OZ.AU (Allan H. Evans, Grand Poobah of Oz)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Net.Dicks (Re: Pained Whale?)
Summary: Net.Dicks
Keywords: Net Dick
Date: 16 Oct 92 05:14:50 GMT
Reply-To: allane@earth.gas.unsw.OZ.AU
Organization: School of Geography, UNSW.

henken@ocf.berkeley.edu (Matthew Jerk Henken) writes:
>jen187@mis.csiro.au (Graham Jenkins writes:
>>allane@earth.gas.unsw.OZ.AU writes:
>>
>> [in response to a query about what Maalox is...]
>> [recipe designed to induce a Maalox craving]
>>
>>Yes, well, thank you. While I'm sure your recipe for enlightenment
>>has some merit, I believe I shall forego the pleasures of experiencing
>>it on this occasion. 
>
>Like anyone gives a shit what you intend to do.  Fuck off and drop dead.

Put very succinctly.

>Peeve:  People who think anyone wants to see their chatty, stupid, pointless
>	responses.  What is going on?  This is alt.PEEVES, god fucking
>	dammit!

So? Is this YOUR peeve? You sound like George "THIS is the UNITED STATES
OF *AMERICA* you're talking about" Bush. 

>
>Peeve:  Too many damn posts about the structure and workings of Peevetown.
>	Get a grip.  It's a cute joke, for about 17 seconds.

True. So shut the fuck up.

>
>Peeve:  He (Banta) also just peeved recently about "chat" newsgroups; from the 
>	above it doesn't look like you can escape that bullshit even here.
>
>Peeve:  Somehow, I've become some sort of net.cop.  Christ.

No. You have become some sort of net.dick. Shithead.

>
>
>Matthew J. Henken 
>henken@ocf.berkeley.edu

with fondest regards (apologies to Charles).

Al

ObPeeve: net.dicks
---
_______________________________________________________________________________
| Allan H. Evans * School of Geography * UNSW * PO Box 1 Kensington 2033 Aust.|
| allane@earth.gas.unsw.OZ.AU  Remote Sensing and Spatial Information Systems |
Xref: sparky alt.peeves:15308 alt.politics.correct:5635 talk.religion.misc:17869
From: padutton@wpi.WPI.EDU (Peter Alan Dutton)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves,alt.politics.correct,talk.religion.misc
Subject: Re: Esoteric Skinhead O'Connor (Was stuff about Mac D's)
Date: 8 Oct 1992 17:41:04 GMT
Organization: Worcester Polytechnic Institute
NNTP-Posting-Host: wpi.wpi.edu

In article <92282.110029SECBH@CUNYVM.BITNET> SECBH@CUNYVM.BITNET writes:
>In regard to Sinead O'Connor's tearing up the Roman Pontiff's picture
>in television:  The fact is that the pope claims to be the head of state
>of a foreign country - as well as a religious leader - he and his
>outraged followers had better get used to the fact that in this day
>and age his secular position alone makes him fair game, and that
>the secular leader this time/religious leader that time stuff is a
>rather tired dodge at this point in history.  The Roman pope and his
>church are no less in the business of politics than the fundies and the
>bornies are with their Pat Buchanans, their Falwells, Sheldons, etc.


The point you miss is that Sinead indicated that he was "evil" before
she tore up the picture, and then told the crowd to "fight the REAL
enemy" afterwards, which is slightly different than making a coherent
religious or political stand against him.

Replacing his picture with one of Buchanan (who is not a religious 
leader - perhaps you mean Robertson), Falwell, or whatever, STILL doesn't
make the action right. And I can't imagine any one even TRYING to support
her actions if she were speaking out against Nelson Mandela and the ANC,
or Judaism, etc.

Notice that she could have protested the actions of the Serbians and the
Bosnians killing each other, or the Sudanese or Somalian governments
killing their people, or even people killing each other in Northern
Ireland. She spoke out against the Pope, who many feel (whether you
or she likes it or not) is a great force for peace in the world, because
apparently he is causing the mess in Ulster, instead of going to Belfast
and picketing the IRA offices or whoever is directly involved. Of course,
she'd risk getting her ass blown off.

Peter!
From: padutton@wpi.WPI.EDU (Peter Alan Dutton)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Esoteric Skinhead O'Connor (Was stuff about Mac D's)
Date: 8 Oct 92 17:26:01 GMT
Organization: Worcester Polytechnic Institute
NNTP-Posting-Host: wpi.wpi.edu

In article <1992Oct8.102347.8019@ac.dal.ca> 01sybok@ac.dal.ca writes:
>In article <Bvr0wz.E98@nic.umass.edu>, jennyg@titan.ucc.umass.edu (Jenny Gutbezahl) writes:

>> I've go this amazing comic book put out by the 7th DAy Adventist church, in
>> they present a lot of bible verse and such to prove that the Pope is the
>> AntiChrist.

[etc.]

>> And, we all know what 112 + 53 + 501 is.

>Hey cool man! This would explani an awful lot (not to mention confirm some
>of my suspicions)...

What? That the 7th-Day Adventists are a bunch of kooks? :-)

Peter!
From: fofp@castle.ed.ac.uk (M Holmes)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Debate?
Date: 12 Oct 92 19:27:01 GMT
Distribution: alt.peeves
Organization: Edinburgh University

larry@peak.psl.nmsu.edu (Evil Engineer doin' it the Cowboy Way) writes:

A Summary of the debate:

Q: What's the problem?

B: Well, it ain't me, but I'll fix it.

P: We're in debt deeper than cowshit.

C: Change, change, change, change, change


Q: What distinguishes you as a candidate?

B: Well *I'm* the President of the Yoonited States of Amurrica!

P: I can afford to pay a whole shitload of people to get me votes.

C: Change, change, change, change, change.


Q: What would you do about the debt?

B: It's not my fault and it isn't as bad as it looks. I *know* how bad
   everybody feels because I saw The Misery Index last week sometime.

P: Don't ask me. There are *plans* for this sort of thing. Probably
   somewhere in Washington if I'm any judge. And *I'm* the man to put 'em
   into action.

C: Well, it's just awful and we need a change so what I'm going to do is
   change things by taking all the spare change of them rich folks.


Q: What about the Chinese and them running over protestors with tanks?

B: pity they didn't do it in Britain 25 years ago.

P: errr, China is a big place with lots of little places in it.

C: For the last time, I didn't organise the bloody protests!


Q: What about the troops in Europe?

B: We need less troops in europe but I haven't decided who to invade
   next yet. You never know, it might be near europe. hell, if they
   don't stop pissing me off over GATT, it might *be* europe.

P: There are almost certainly some plans for this sort of thing and I'm
   just the man to carry them out.

C: Look, I'm not protesting about us having troops in europe. I just
   thought maybe they'd like to come home for a bit.


Q: What would you do about drugs?

B: Well, I've been doing a lot about this.  We need people with the
   proper experience to handle this issue.  For instance there's a Supreme
   Court Judge... 

P: Well, we'll have some army bases going spare. A bit of discipline is
   what they need.....

C: Look, I didn't even inhale....


Q: Jeese, what jerks. Look, how about you all just pick a phrase for
   Prime Time TV?

B: Family Values. Trust. Experience.

P: errrr. I'm sure there are plans for this sort of thing. Probably
   somewhere in Washington.....

C: change, change, change, change, change


And The Three Stooges will be back to a TV set near you real soon now.

FoFP

Disclaimer: Who'd listen to my opinions anyway. Jeese, I was dumb enough
to leave the pub early to watch this show. It'll never get a second season.
From: okes@essex.ac.uk (Oke S)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: (Im)personal stereos
Date: 12 Oct 92 13:07:58 GMT
Organization: Department of Computer Science, University of Essex, UK.

Peeve: the guy two machines away from me has a personal stereo. Unfortunately
he also has an impressive set of headphones which are at this moment hanging
round his neck as he is being shown how to play xpilot. This, however, does
not count as a valid reason for him to turn the bloody thing off. And I can
hear his (crap, IMHO) music from here. I'm going to move to another part of the
room in a minute where hopefully the air-conditioning will drown it out.

--
This signature is copyright 12/6/1992 Simon Oke. All rights reserved. If you
like it and keep a copy for your own use, you owe me $20. Please pass it on
to your friends with all documentation.              Email okes@essex.ac.uk.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
 ...though he was master of all the world, he was not quite sure what to
	do next. But he would think of something.
From: tim@physics.orst.edu (Tim Mefford)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Japanese Tourists ate my building.
Keywords: Losers
Date: 12 Oct 92 23:18:18 GMT
Reply-To: tim@physics.orst.edu
Organization: Up the,

In article <1992Oct12.210751.26975@twg.com>, donp@twg.com (Don Pette) writes:
|> 
|> No my friend, you are not. My office mate Nolan (gabby) Hinshaw and
|> myself are drowning in the sea of amour too.
|> 

Now there's a vivid image I'll be working to expel from my thoughts.
Nolan and Don, smothered a tablespoon at a time.

-- 
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
      Tim Mefford           |           "vidi, veni"      
  tim@physics.orst.edu      |    -Julius Caesar on Cleopatra
________________________________________________________________
From: 01sybok@ac.dal.ca
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Esoteric Skinhead O'Connor (Was stuff about Mac D's)
Date: 8 Oct 92 13:23:47 GMT
Organization: Dalhousie University, Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada

In article <Bvr0wz.E98@nic.umass.edu>, jennyg@titan.ucc.umass.edu (Jenny Gutbezahl) writes:
> In article <1asgoaINNfkl@bigboote.WPI.EDU> padutton@wpi.WPI.EDU (Peter Alan Dutton) writes:
>>In article <1992Oct6.111639.7977@ac.dal.ca> 01sybok@ac.dal.ca writes:
>>>>

[skinhead stuff deleted]

> I've go this amazing comic book put out by the 7th DAy Adventist church, in
> they present a lot of bible verse and such to prove that the Pope is the
> AntiChrist.  The comic book format is great, because it allows such visuals
> as the Catholic Church as the Whore of Babylon.
> 
> Probably the most entertaining argument they put forth is numerological.
> Seems the Pope's official title is Vicarius Filii Dei, which means Vicar
> of the Son of God - it used to be printed on his Mitre, so of the Catholic
> equivalent of a press card, I guess.  Anyway, the Adventists translate all
> the Cs, Vs Ds and Is in to Roman Numerals with this result:
> 


> And, we all know what 112 + 53 + 501 is.
> 
> 

Hey cool man! This would explani an awful lot (not to mention confirm some
of my suspicions)...


Mike
From: geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM (Mahatma Poontang)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Hare Triggers
Date: 13 Oct 92 00:27:33 GMT
Reply-To: geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM (Mahatma Poontang)
Distribution: alt
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Menlo Park, Ca.
NNTP-Posting-Host: purplehaze.corp.sun.com



Posted for Stephen Jackson (sjackson@parc.xerox.com), who doesn't have
posting access:


----- Begin Included Peeve -----


From sjackson@parc.xerox.com Mon Oct 12 17:22:26 1992
To: geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM
Subject: Re: Hare Triggers
Date: 	Mon, 12 Oct 1992 17:21:42 PDT
X-Lines: 40


Peeve:  EUNIX(TM)

!Peeve:  I have a buddy with the license plate UNIX SX

donita@scic.intel.com (Donita Thompson) writes:

>No, wait...that's not my worst peeve. Door-to-door christian
>sellers of religion are the worst. I'm glad I moved to the country.
>They don't come out there to the mountains. They're probably 
>afraid that they'll get shot and buried out back. <wicked grin>

I'm afraid we have bad news for you.  They do come out to the
mountains.  I get them about once a year in La Honda.  I usta
rant and rave at them but I got tired of it.  Now I just ask
them to please go away.  They do.  It being an election year and
all anything I can do to keep my blood pressure under control...

In last night's phone call with the fellow who is living our life
for us in Oregon (another peeve altogether) related a recent
encounter with the JW's.  He was hosing the chickens off the 
porch when they walked 600' up the driveway (gate locked shut).

He laid a rabid Sub-Genius/Libertarian rant on them for about
half an hour, then flew into a Zen Agnostic rapture describing
how foolish one had to be to miss the divinity of the wind
blowing in the trees, the sun in the sky, and the chickens
crapping on the porch, again.  He finished with another
application of the hose.  He claims they left speechless.

I'd have to see it to believe it.

regards,

Stephen Jackson


----- End Included Peeve -----



Geoff


-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-
Geoff Miller                    + + + + + + + +        Sun Microsystems
geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM  + + + + + + + +     Menlo Park, California
-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-
Newsgroups: alt.peeves,alt.folklore.urban
From: billn@hpcvaac.cv.hp.com (bill nelson)
Subject: Re: McDonald's and the IRA (Re: Big mac's and students)
Organization: Hewlett-Packard Company, Corvallis, Oregon USA
Date: Thu, 15 Oct 1992 16:43:11 GMT

wisp@dcs.warwick.ac.uk (Wisp) writes:
: 
: Up until the end of WW I (just after, actually), the *whole* of Ireland
: belonged to Britain. When independence was sorted out, the Protestant majority
: in the north of the country, fearful of being put under the control of the
: predominantly Catholic southerners (and who can blame them, judging by the
: midaeval attitudes to abortion in Eire?), demanded to remain part of the
: UK. So it was agreed, as an expedient to both sides to sort out the main
: problem, independence for Eire.

Hm, where was it that I read that Northern Ireland was also predominantly
Catholic? Maybe the Protestants in N.Ireland just had more political clout.
Maybe I am wrong - could you point me to an unbiased source, is such an
entity exists?

: As for giving it back, nothing would please me more. The fact remains that the
: majority of people in Northern Ireland want to remain British, and no
: government is going to give them away to Dublin. Maybe an indepenent Northern
: Ireland is the answer: who knows? It's not a question of being 'determined to
: keep Northern Ireland', just an inability to find any solution that will
: even partly satisfy everyone...

Or, the people with money want to remain British? I expect that, the same as
here in the US, money speaks louder in politics than personal desires.

Bill

Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: allane@earth.gas.unsw.OZ.AU (Allan H. Evans)
Subject: Re: Pained Whale?
Reply-To: allane@earth.gas.unsw.OZ.AU
Organization: School of Geography, UNSW.
Date: Thu, 8 Oct 1992 01:06:38 GMT

bberbeni@nyx.cs.du.edu (Bill Berbenich) writes:
>
>ObPeeve:  I have a coffee maker in my palatial penthouse offices.  Sometimes
>          I'll make a pot (Maxwell House Columbian Supreme - the best!) 

Uh, Bill, have you ever tried buying whole beans from a coffee shop and 
grinding them fresh? Comments like this remind me of someone talking about
cheese:

--- Have you tried Kraft Cracker Barrel? The best!

Methinks Tasmanian King Island chedder might have an edge. As a matter of
fact, just about any cheddar that comes with a wax coating probably would.
As for coffee, I will admit some pre-packaged coffees are better than others,
but "the best"?

Just a thought.

Al
---
_______________________________________________________________________________
| What do you mean ten cups of ccccoooffffeee is excessssivvvvveee?!?         |
| Allan H. Evans * School of Geography * UNSW * PO Box 1 Kensington 2033 Aust.|
| allane@earth.gas.unsw.OZ.AU  Remote Sensing and Spatial Information Systems |
From: pdc@dcs.ed.ac.uk (Paul Crowley)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Harpoon 'em if they can't take a joke
Date: 13 Oct 92 15:09:55 GMT
Reply-To: pdc@dcs.ed.ac.uk (Paul Crowley)
Organization: Laboratory for the Foundations of Computer Science, Edinburgh U

In article <1992Oct09.075213.23250@sco.COM> charless@sco.COM (Charlie Stross) writes:
>
>Sod it, if we're going to make ourselves ill eating flesh, why 
>can't we at least revel in the depravity of it?

If I may take the liberty of reprinting in full the lyrics of a song by
that excellent band, "International Werewolf Conspiracy":

"Dead animal, dead animal
I want to eat some dead animal
Dead animal, dead animal
I want to eat some meat.
Dead animal, dead animal
I want to eat some dead animal
Don't give me this vegetarian shit,
I want to eat some meat."

I want a T-shirt that says "Test cosmetics on animals" on the front,
and "Kill animals and eat them" on the back.  Actually, I think the
most amusing part of it is the moral horror attached to bestiality.
So, it's all right to kill them and eat them, but it's evil beyond
imagining to *sleep* with them?
--
  __                                ____
\/ o\ Paul Crowley pdc@dcs.ed.ac.uk \  /
/\__/ "SET ME ON FIRE!" - Big Black  \/
From: boucher@csl.sri.com (Peter K. Boucher)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Spanish and German
Date: 10 Oct 1992 22:09:12 GMT
Organization: Computer Science Lab, SRI International
Distribution: world
NNTP-Posting-Host: omaha.csl.sri.com
Keywords: deer season is almost here!



|> >Peeve': my brain seems to have only 2 language slots: English and
|> >"other". This leads to interesting situation where I'll use a Spanish
|> >article with a German word.
|> >
|> Drinken wir spatlese con nuestras spatzlen?
|> I hate it when that happens.  Apologies to speakers of both languages
|> I butchered.

Ich sprechen nich madres deutch.

ObPeeve: Pendejos who can't get their scheiss straight and mezclan
their Espan~ol mit der deutch.

-- 
Peter K. Boucher
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Computer Science Lab, SRI International             Software Engineer
333 Ravenswood Ave. #EL-237                         (415) 859-3927
Menlo Park, CA  94025                               boucher@csl.sri.com
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: zursch@whizkid.wpd.sgi.com (Jeffrey B. Zurschmeide)
Subject: Re: Meeting Rah-Rahs
Reply-To: zursch@whizkid.wpd.sgi.com (Jeffrey B. Zurschmeide)
Organization: Silicon Graphics, Inc.
Distribution: alt
Date: Fri, 16 Oct 1992 20:08:11 GMT


I think you're only upset about the meetings because they force you to 
come down from the roof, where you've been watching the Blue Angels
all week. 

I have it on good authority that you were seen atop a Sun building
stroking your stiff dingus while wearing only Ray-Ban aviator shades, a 
flight vest, a G-Shock watch, and some F-15 wheel bearing grease, 
while holding a half-empty bottle of Southern Comfort, sitting in a beach 
chair with a ghetto blaster playing Kenny Loggins' theme song from
"Top Gun" over and over and screaming YEEEEEEE-HAW! as the boys flew by. 

Or at least that's what Bob Dornan said last night....

JZ

Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: charless@sco.COM (AutoPope)
Subject: Re: Possible Conspiracy Uncovered
Organization: The Somewhat Contagious Operation, Inc.
Distribution: alt
Date: Thu, 08 Oct 1992 07:24:00 GMT


In article <ld3b2nINN8p1@jethro.Corp.Sun.COM> geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM (Geoff Miller) writes:
>
>
>After a lunchtime conversation with JZ yesterday in which we discussed 
>the whereabouts of a certain powder blue Sprite race car, it dawned on
>me that I've never seen any blue powder.  
>
>How do expressions like this get started, figures of speech that have no
>basis in reality?  Who comes up with them, and why?  Is it a conspiracy
>to drive the human race slowly nuts?  Are the Reptoids involved?
>
>Okay, who has the blue powder?  I bet the Air Force has some, locked in
>a tightly-guarded hangar somewhere along with those frozen alien bodies.

ObAirForceFactoid (That's the Royal Air Force, for all you continentally-
challenged peevesters): During the thirties and forties, the RAF
used to paint the undersides of some of their fighters in a shade
known as ``duck-egg green''. Yep, that's a shade of pale turqoise.

Like the man said, ``Language is a virus from outer space.'' Me,
I'm so spaced out I do it for a living ...


-- 
Charlie Stross aka charless@scol.sco.com ..... UNIX oriented text mangler
WARNING: The opinions voiced in the preceding electronic document are the
product of a warped mind. Take two before meals.
From: jeremy@castle.ed.ac.uk (Jeremy Henderson)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: More Peeves About Brookside And Food
Date: 12 Oct 92 12:38:34 GMT
Organization: Edinburgh University

Just for Mike Holmes here is what's been happening:

Patricia was pregnant but had a miscarriage at the Round Table. This had
nothing to do with her mastectomy. John Harrison has run away in embarrassment 
over the discovery that he is a kleptomaniac and is staying with his
brother. Rod Corkhill's eye is recovering, and he got a job as a security
guard, but he left Diane because he suspected she was being humped by
Peter Harrison. Mick and Ellis are having trouble meeting payments on the
Pizza Parlour, and are the object of racist attacks, possibly orchestrated
by the new garage owner. Ellis is being comforted by the Education Committee
lovely, Marion, even though it appeared at one time that Mick might be
getting in on the act. Tracy was invited to stay the night at Brian's, but
only to sleep on the couch. Terry and Sinbad went to see Barry Grant in Madrid.

Understand everything now?

ExtraPeeve:

Theft of my coffee mug.
======================

Whenever I go to coffee I find that some larcenous git has stolen my
coffee mug. It's probably a geologist. That means that even if I find
it again I'll probably catch Alzheimer's disease from it. Anyway, if this
continues I'll have to get a mug that says something like "THIS COFFEE
MUG PROTECTED BY SECURITY GUARDS. ARMED RESPONSE 24HRS".

-- 
===Jeremy Henderson===jeremy@castle.ed.ac.uk=          Vommen
                                             Bladmagen
                                   Loepmagen
                        Naetmagen
From: fofp@castle.ed.ac.uk (M Holmes)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Freshers
Date: 12 Oct 92 15:16:15 GMT
Organization: Edinburgh University

tjc@castle.ed.ac.uk (A J Cunningham) writes:

>.... And after reading "Parliament of Whores" I'm beginning to
>suspect that some of Mike's rantings might be right on the mark. This is
>very worrying and is keeping me awake at nights. 

Yeah. I'd begun to suspect I was a libertarian for quite a while. I have
what my teachers used to describe as "a problem with authority", a
serious obsession concerning mortgage interest relief, and an intense
dislike of the sort of nonsense laws that goverments seem particularly
proud of. Elections have found me so far voting for every party except
the looney ones: Tories and Natural Law Party. I knew, deep down, that
my heart wasn't in the politics of any of 'em. 

But what can you do? There are no Anna Raeburn Helplines for Apoliticals
Anonymous. 

Finally some unknown usenetter sent me some kind of quiz and grid to do
with political alignment and I landed squarely in the libertarian
section. What was I to do? Could I really be a libertarian? How did my
upbringing fail so badly? Could I honestly blame the government for this
one?

Then, on Geoff's reccommendation, I read "Parliament of Whores" and
discovered that it's ok to be a libertarian. Not only is it ok, but
Jeremy Doesn't Like It (JDLI). In fact, in a world like this, it's the
only sensible option.

Now I have to figure out how to tell my parents....

obPeeve: Without Marrou, the US Presidential debate was pretty damn
dull.


>-- 
>Tony Cunningham

FoFP