HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
Apparently-To: FNORD-L@UBVM.cc.buffalo.edu
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Date:         Sat, 7 Nov 1992 05:42:31 -0500
From:         Boss@BLACK.ILLUMINATI.GOV
Subject:      re: Reports of our existence...

Yet another obvious and clumsy forgery - someone attempting to
cut-and-paste my .signature into their forged mail and failing
miserably.

It should be apparent by this time that there are no "resonable persons"
on this list, which is --as I said before-- why we don't care about
revealing ourselves here.  Who would believe any of YOU?

The Boss
--
Illuminati.gov - We know you know that we know that you know that
we know that you know that we know that you know that we saw that!
I'm the Boss, I don't need a disclaimer!
                                       Boss@black.illuminati.gov
From: GKORNMAN@USMCP6.BITNET (GREG KORNMAN)
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Subject: new subscriber
Date: 11 Nov 92 02:57:57 GMT
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU

Hi all!  I am a new subscriber and I just want to know what you all are
discussing.  What kind of "new ways of thinking" are you thinking?
Basically, I am asking for general information about this list so I can
decide if this is a list I want to be on.  Also, about how much mail does
one receive daily (average)?  Well, I hope to hear from someone soon.

Live Long And Prosper And May The Force Be With You!
Nanu!  Nanu!





Gregory A. Kornman <GKORNMAN@USMCP6.BITNET>
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
From: DOBENSON@ua1vm.ua.edu (Joe Demon)
Subject: Re: Fnords -- kinda like this sub
Organization: The University of Alabama, Tuscaloosa
Date: Fri, 6 Nov 1992 06:22:39 GMT

In article <9211040613.AA21613@relay2.UU.NET>
Boss@BLACK.ILLUMINATI.GOV writes:
 
>Of course we exist, silly human.
>
>And most of Us are typical 9-to-5 drones.  We can safely reveal ourselves
>to you madmen for the same reason we let people WE want locked up see our
>Flying Saucers.
>
I saw a saucer once. It had a cup on it. Full of tea.
  I like tea. With honey.
  And sometimes just a tad of milk.
  And maybe a record. Some jazz.
  Or not.
  What was I talking about?
 
            ^ ^                JOE DEMON                 ^ ^
      ^ ^   |||                                          |||   ^ ^
^ ^   |||    |           a helluva wicked sort            |    |||   ^ ^
|||    |     |                                            |     |    |||
 |     |     |                                            |     |     |
 |     |     |                                            |     |     |
 | BITNET: DOBENSON@UA1VM             INTERNET: DOBENSON@UA1VM.UA.EDU |
From: mbm@PACSCL.UARC.UPENN.EDU ((MM))
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Subject: Fuck or Fight
Date: 7 Nov 92 04:31:11 GMT
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU
Return-Path: <mbm@pacscl.uarc.upenn.edu>
Posted-Date: Fri, 6 Nov 92 23:31:11 EST

Agamemnon in my closet

Mom and Dad were my last deposit

at my bank.

I have a very good chance

of landing a position

at a think tank.

Clytemnestra's in my pocket

wrench is worthless without sockets

climb all over that lady's crotch

a fine maneuver if the deed's

in hand.

When the blood's in the head you either sing it out loud

or the thing in print just stumbles, gets elbowed, trips

but god did that raving man who say FALSE PROPHETS man about

five feet two have a fine baritone no raw scrape bellow

that filled a whole block and turned the heads

and made the big men smile as they walked past eating a lunch out of a bag.

Screamer we all know here in town does keep it on going screaming

but he's all rasp this man today was brownly full tone

and moving very fast like a souvenir I mean a torpedo or a dangerous small fish

down the sidewalk with a voice larger than us or the street

but as I wa saying I would rather sing and come out at the wrong time

with a good minor key note with head turned body jerked around and froze

to show one of the postures of assumed lunacy

than to have to print it out guess that guy made funcum wanna shout

but it's not his turn so he opens a can of V-8 with a short-top

and carts a man's sins down the low road, half sexed and sickening

manic for the part time

uniball.
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Date:         Wed, 4 Nov 1992 16:04:43 EST
From:         CYNOVY@EMUVM1.BITNET
Subject:      Re: Return of the Sausage
              13 Aug 1992 15:39:00 GMT from <MATMACCONAON@BODKIN.UCG.IE>

Have you ever seen a dream walking?
                       Well, I did.
Have you ever seen a dream talking?
                       Well, I did.
Have you ever seen a dream right in your arms, saying I love you, I do?
Well the dream that was walking and the dream that was talking and the
   heaven in my arms was ros.

Happy Birthday, and God Bless Everyone!
You've been a complete disappointment AND a waste of time!
Good night!

libalp
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU
Apparently-To: FNORD-L@UBVM.cc.buffalo.edu
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Date:         Tue, 10 Nov 1992 04:21:17 -0500
From:         Boss@BLACK.ILLUMINATI.GOV
Subject:      re:Au contraire, mon frere

>>Yet another obvious and clumsy forgery - someone attempting to
>>cut-and-paste my .signature into their forged mail and failing
>>miserably.
>
>No, no- if you'll look below, you'll see your .sig, neatly cut and
>pasted into this forged mail, just as it was in the previous forgery;
>succeeding admirably, I'd say.

Again, this imp[oster messed up, while he got the main block
correct, he [she?] failed to place my ADDRESS at the bottom,
like I always do.

Knowing more than You,
The Boss

ps- forgot the 'standard double-dash', too!
--
Illuminati.gov - We know you know that we know that you know that
we know that you know that we know that you know that we saw that!
I'm the Boss, I don't need a disclaimer!
                                       Boss@black.illuminati.gov
From: LIBWCA@EMUVM1.BITNET
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Subject: Re: MEMO TO LIBWCA
Date: 11 Nov 92 14:58:29 GMT
Organization: Emory University - Atlanta, Georgia, USA
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU

Mr. Parker:
Thank you for you unsolicited critique of my recent screenplay, entitled
_Death Takes a Butt Break_.  Given your proclivity for overly-broad,
Curly-Joe-like characterizations, I concede my mistake in considering
you for the part of the many-layered, sardonic gunslinger, Billy Libalp;
you will be happy to know that the role has been filled by Robert
McElwaine, currently very hot following his tour-de-force preformance in
_Whirling Gibberish_.  We are very pleased, also, to have secured the
services of incomparable golden-age star Patrick Salsbury, who will
provide a brief-but-vital cameo in the heart-rending disinterment
scene; Mr. Salsbury agreed to do the role after representatives for
several current stars informed us that their clients "don't work with
leeches".  There are several roles which remain uncast, including
one which might intrigue you:

DANIEL; a preacher-man.

Please have your agent call my office.  I look forward to working with
you; you will, of course, provide your own sackcloth and sawed-off
rabbit-gun.
LIBWCA
LIBWCA Productions
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU
Return-Path: <mbm@pacscl.uarc.upenn.edu>
Posted-Date: Wed, 4 Nov 92 20:29:40 EST
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Date:         Wed, 4 Nov 1992 20:29:40 EST
From:         "(MM)" <mbm@PACSCL.UARC.UPENN.EDU>
Subject:      stream talking trash

Dick plastic Joe donned

for the Halloween party,

and the skin shavings

they gleaned from the older guys

all made up the rich currents

why there were fabulous

arriving at the state farms

and cascading onto yellowed sheets

long after that party was over,

the water still.
From: LIBALP@EMUVM1.BITNET
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Subject: Re: Magick and technology
Date: 12 Nov 92 16:19:00 GMT
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU

>the end of the world (as we know it) that is predicted to appear shortly after
>the year 2000 is supposed to represent the merging of magick and technology.

Which end of the world are we talking about here?
If it's the one I think you're talking about, how does magick enter into it?
And where's my videophone and wrist TV?

>Could it be possible that (magick and) technology are equal and parrellel
>beliefs in the collective human conscousness?

What is the difference between magick and technology?
I mean, can't magick just be technology we don't understand yet, like the
caveman who used magnets to hold his children in place?

just wondering,
alp
From: LIBWCA@EMUVM1.BITNET
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Subject: Hey, a little respect?
Date: 7 Nov 92 03:50:28 GMT
Organization: Emory University - Atlanta, Georgia, USA
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU

Funcum, yer betting out of turn.  Can we try to get these things
straight?  Do I have to bring out the weasels?
I believe the bet is to the Lovely New Mother, who doesn't even come
around here any more, so the logic of dealing her a hand escapes me-
but it's dealt, and somebody has to play it.  Somebody.
Fuck or fight, boys.  Fuck or fight.
Cuthbert
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU
Organization: Emory University - Atlanta, Georgia, USA
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Date:         Fri, 6 Nov 1992 10:13:18 EST
From:         "Arthur L. Parker" <LIBALP@EMUVM1.BITNET>
Subject:      Re: GETCHER CHECKS

I'll see yer reflective Funcum and raise you a Pale Shadow of What
Once Was.  Oh, and $3 on the fishhooks.  Wait, make it $4 and the
Heart of an Honest Man.  (Honk)  And one boiled egg.

alp
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU
X-Delivery-Notice:  SMTP MAIL FROM does not correspond to sender.
X-Envelope-to: FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Date:         Thu, 12 Nov 1992 15:37:00 -06
From:         Dana Rollins <ROLLIDE@AUDUCADM.DUC.AUBURN.EDU>
Subject:      HEY HAG!

You in or what?
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
From: rgv9488@ritvax.isc.rit.edu
Subject: Re: illuminati my eye
Reply-To: rgv9488@ritvax.isc.rit.edu
Organization: Rochester Institute of Technology
Date: Sun, 8 Nov 1992 22:09:49 GMT

Well, if we existed, we'd probably be very sorry for the inconvienience.
However, we don't, so we're not. You never saw this. Have a nice day.
Forget you read this. We don't exist. Neither does Bill Clinton. FNORD.

                                                  -Merlin

We know all.
We see all.
We are all.
I heard that!!!!
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Date:         Mon, 9 Nov 1992 08:39:40 EST
From:         Boss@BLACK.ILLUMINATI.GOV
Subject:      Au contraire, mon frere

>Yet another obvious and clumsy forgery - someone attempting to
>cut-and-paste my .signature into their forged mail and failing
>miserably.

No, no- if you'll look below, you'll see your .sig, neatly cut and
pasted into this forged mail, just as it was in the previous forgery;
succeeding admirably, I'd say.

The Boss

Illuminati.gov - We know you know that we know that you know that
we know that you know that we know that you know that we saw that!
I'm the Boss, I don't need a disclaimer!

The Boss's .Sig (Forged)
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU
Return-Path: <mbm@pacscl.uarc.upenn.edu>
Posted-Date: Sat, 7 Nov 92 20:53:50 EST
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Date:         Sat, 7 Nov 1992 20:53:50 EST
From:         "(MM)" <mbm@PACSCL.UARC.UPENN.EDU>
Subject:      Procedure 3

Climb onto the hood of the automobile.

Keep most of your weight on your knees.

Place both palms on the windshield, with a space between

so that you may stare into the face of the man behind the wheel.

Shout "Go! Go! Do it! Floor it Muuuuuuuuthaaaaaaafuuuuuuuuuckaaaaaaaaa!"

Your accelerated heart rate will alert you to the fact

that you have frightened the man behind the wheel.

He will have "wide eyes" and have "shit himself."

Now the hood is slick with wax and your knees suddenly

slip and shoot out in opposite directions

and the dotted line you have prepared down your middle

will mark where the flesh splits also down the middle

only just a little to one side

leaving




Uniball.
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Date:         Wed, 11 Nov 1992 04:21:34 EST
From:         CYNOVY@EMUVM1.BITNET
Subject:      Re: new subscriber

Dibs on his entrails.

Oh, and if HAG doesn't show pretty soon, i'll be glad to fill
in for her.... arthur and i can team when we switch to bridge.
I'll just get my blonde wig out of the closet....

Hi, I'm General Mills's sister....

Call me Hayley.

Didja ever see Parent Trap?


libalp
From: NK8287@BROCK1P.BITNET (Nick A. Kraft)
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Subject: Magick and technology
Date: 12 Nov 92 01:25:54 GMT
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU

I had an interesting series of thoughts last night.

Some theries of magick state that when a person can make himself believe in
totality of a change occuring in nature, he can effect that change in the
universe around him, that is to say that the world is formed by our perceptions,
and also of those around us.

However, there is science and technology that can make great machines by the
study of natural laws.

Now I assume that everyone here has heard the saying that sufficiently
advanced technology is indistinguishable to an observer from magick.  Also,
Date:     WED, NOV 11 1992 19:39:14
From:     Nick A. Kraft   <NK8287@BROCK1P>
Subject:  Magick and technology
To:          <FNORD-L@UBVM>


I had an interesting series of thoughts last night.

Some theries of magick state that when a person can make himself believe in
totality of a change occuring in nature, he can effect that change in the
universe around him, that is to say that the world is formed by our perceptions,
and also of those around us.

However, there is science and technology that can make great machines by the
study of natural laws.

Now I assume that everyone here has heard the saying that sufficiently
advanced technology is indistinguishable to an observer from magick.  Also,
the end of the world (as we know it) that is predicted to appear shortly after
the year 2000 is supposed to represent the merging of magick and technology.
Furthermore, humankind is on the edge of exploding into the age of
nanotechnology.

Could it be possible that technology are equal and parrellel beliefs in the
collective human conscousness?

Nunner
*********************** NK8287@ACSPR1.ACS.BROCKPORT.EDU ***********************

No one heard the shot ring out from
     Under thier sleepy world.
          Never to be heard,
               Never understood.
                    Each person felt the change,
                         Resting where they could not feel.

*******************************************************************************
From: LIBALP@EMUVM1.BITNET
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Subject: MEMO TO LIBWCA
Date: 11 Nov 92 13:50:00 GMT
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU

Date: November 11, 1992
Re:   RE: HAG

Mr. Anderson,
     Given the quality of your previous work, it pains me to inform you
that your latest submission is unacceptable.  We are sending it back due to the
dearth of Juicy Lines for Me to Deliver.
> Cuthbert, get that drunken old fool back in here,
> with or without his spleen!
You know I don't do spleen-talk, and yet, there it is.

I could be persuaded to do a cameo, if I am given the role of FUNCUM.
> Oh, the pain!  Oh, death, where is thy sting?
These lines are quite nice, and can be delivered by me without the professional
compromise inherent in the Billy LIBALP role.  I see CYNOVY cast as a somewhat
more mysterious Billy LIBALP than we have previously seen.

In subsequent drafts, you might want to think about OVERHEAD. Got me? OVERHEAD.
Granted, an off-screen murder is much cheaper, but I know your tendencies.

Think about: New Ways of Thinking

Regards,
alp
From: mbm@PACSCL.UARC.UPENN.EDU ((MM))
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Subject: Dealer
Date: 7 Nov 92 01:30:44 GMT
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU
Return-Path: <mbm@pacscl.uarc.upenn.edu>
Posted-Date: Fri, 6 Nov 92 20:30:44 EST

Funcum raise a barbell two bits

grow the pot steam up glasses

bar code sterling give me three

cards were drunk she fished

from pot raised into the sulfurous

air Funcum passed

a fiver.


Uniball still in the game.
From: A6@ESOC.BITNET
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.rscs-l
Subject: Gateway Security Modifications GSM
Date: 12 Nov 92 23:02:49 GMT
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU

Hi,
(I hope that my note arrives in a readable format this time)
We run RSCS V3.1 with the GSM exits. What I don't understand is what the
'SUPER' group in the SECURITY DIRECT is used for. We read the manual n
times and still don't understand it. Who gives us a hand? Thanks.

Regards Hermann Schneider
        Network Coordinator
        ESOC (European Space Agency's Operations Centre)
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU
Organization: University of California at Santa Barbara
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.rscs-l
Date:         Fri, 13 Nov 1992 08:51:58 PST
From:         "Dwight M. McCann" <DWIGHT@UCSBVM.BITNET>
Subject:      RSCS V3.1 Exit Package Example

I have have just completed writing an RSCS Exit Package.  It provides an
interface to send escape sequences to RSCS SNA3270P (and any others that
invoke Exit17) printers in place of header and trailer separators, with
the particular sequence sent based on the Spool File's FORM code and the
LINKID of the printer.  The printers and FORM/LINKID escape sequences
are controlled by files created via CMS (XEDIT in my case) and read
during initialization.  We will be using it to set page orientation and
font.

While the function provided by the package may not be of interest, this
exit package utilizes numerous RSCS V3.1 APIs:  DMTQSAxx using both RSCS
and locally defined QSABLOKs for memory management, DMTCOMFI for reading
disk files, DMTMPTxx for parsing command parameters in a manner
compatible with CRI prefixing, RMSG using both RSCS and local conversion
and translation repositories including local use of DSECT oriented
conversion definitions.  This package demonstrates allocation and
chaining of local control blocks anchored in the CVT, and use of 'user
fields' to share information between exit calls.  The package contains
entrypoints for EXIT 0 (Initialization), EXIT 1 (Termination), EXIT 17
(Separator selection), EXIT 18 (Separator generation for both header and
trailer), and EXIT 29 (Unknown command).  All entrypoints are contained
in a single module, along with the compiled local translation and
conversion repositories (VMFLKED information is given in the prolog).

If there is any interest I will supply the code here or send it via
BITNET or Internet to those requesting it.  The locally supplied DSECTs
and Macro are included 'inline' obviating need for special MACLIBs.

Dwight McCann <DWIGHT@UCSBVM>
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.rscs-l
Date:         Tue, 10 Nov 1992 13:34:02 CET
From:         A6@ESOC.BITNET
Subject:      MAXHOPS

Hi,
when we installed RSCS V3.1 at the beginning of this year, we set the
MAXHops value in the OPTION statement to 60. It happened then a couple
of times, that we received files with a MAXH of greater than 60. But
this was acutally not true. Therefore we took MAXH out. Does anybody
know if there is a problem with this?

Regards Hermann Schneider
        Network Coordinator
        ESOC (European Space Agency's Operations Centre)
From: m.bosworth@DPC.DPC.UMASSP.EDU
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.dasig
Subject: New DAMA Chapter
Date: 6 Nov 92 22:43:21 GMT
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU

A new DAMA (Data Administration Management Association) chapter is
starting up in the Connecticut Valley part of Connecticut and western
Massachusetts (So. Vermont and New Hampshire?).  Most meetings will be
held in the Hartford, CT/Springfield, MA area.  There will likely be
meetings every other month.  Emphasis will be on both industry speakers
and sharing of the experience of practicioners of Data Administration.

Membership rates are $30 per individual or $120 per organization.  (First
membership year runs Jan 1 - 1993 through Dec 31 1993.)

If you are interested, please send me a message with your surface mail
address and I will see that you get on our mailing list.

Many of the member organizations are going to be insurance companies in the
Hartford/Springfield area, but the University of Mass. participates fully
and would certainly like to see more educational institutions be part of
the new group.
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@TWNMOE10
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.sqlinfo
Date:         Tue, 10 Nov 1992 11:51:40 EST
Comments:     Converted from PROFS to RFC822 format by PUMP V2.2X
From:         "DR.S.SRINIVASAN,
              Associate Professor of CIS" <S0SRIN01@ULKYVM.LOUISVILLE.EDU>
Subject:      Embedding SQL/DS command in COBOL2 (VM/XA)

College of Business & PA,  University of Louisville
Louisville, KY 40292, PH: (502) 588 7830  FAX:502 588 7557
Dear Netters:
     I am trying to embed a SQL/DS command such as SELECT * FROM tbname
in a COBOL2 program.  When I run this the COBOL program produces an output
that is all blank.  However, the number of blank lines in the output match
the number of records that would be fetched by the SQL command.  I first
linked to the SQLMACHine.  In the CLG EXEC for COBOL, I added the following
two to the LOAD command:  ARIRVSTC   and   ARIRPADR4.  I invoked the
SQLPREProcessor first and then executed the COBOL program.  Can any one
help to identify the problem as to why all output lines are blank?
      Advance thanks to any one who could help.

Thanking you.
Srini
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.sqlinfo
Date:         Mon, 9 Nov 1992 09:02:55 EST
From:         Carol Hey <IHEY400@INDYCMS.BITNET>
Subject:      Re: query problem

You didn't state in your question how this query is being done?  Is it
in a COBOL program, RXSQL, ISQL, etc.  That makes a big difference.  We
are also on SQL/DS 3.2 and have found that the optimizer handles COBOL
different than the others.  Page 119 of the System Database Administration
manual has a table in it that tells when the optimizer uses indexes.  We
have found that if we can change code (such as greater than or like) to
'between' in a COBOL program it will use the index and will perform much
better.  Also, if you're using COBOL, don't forget to rebind the package
after creating a new index.
Comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU
Organization: University of Antwerp - UFSIA - Computing Center
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.sqlinfo
Date:         Mon, 9 Nov 1992 21:03:23 SET
Comments:     Resent-From: <NETNEWS@RKC.UFSIA.AC.BE>
Comments:     Originally-From: <PS890866@BANUFS11.BITNET>
From:         NETNEWS@RKC.UFSIA.AC.BE
Subject:      Re: HELP!!! FaxModem Problems...

I have similar problems with the Intel Satisfaxtion/400 faxmodem.
I also don't manage to receive automaticly (only when I'm waiting and push the
button for current connection it works).  Can somebody explain why.
Sending goes very good when it is a fax, modem transmission are a paine.
Thanks in advance.
Lode