From: swalter@nyx.cs.du.edu (DreamWeaver)
Subject: Re: FOOD FIGHT - CONGA - PORTABLE HOLE
Organization: University of Denver, Dept. of Math & Comp. Sci.
Distribution: na
Date: Fri, 11 Sep 92 01:53:59 GMT


{Continued from a recent post to "Lisa Dominique: >>>ARCtopography"
thread, where DreamWeaver was just about to join the fray...}

::DreamWeaver turns from the door to the ARCafeteria to glance at what
used to be RIP ... now a 5' wide, 8' tall pile of confectioner's ooze ...
neatly topped with a sign saying "He Never Saw It Coming - Rest In Peace,
RIP" nestled among the M&Ms and chocolate covered cherries.  Over the
"shoulder" of the pile ... which was beginning to show some signs of
internal life, DW could see the vacant chair of dear Lexi ... a compatriot
and fellow FoodAlly whom he'd enjoyed many a post with in days past.

But Lexi was gone ... left ARCland to travel 'cross the GreatOcean. 
DreamWeaver wondered if all was well with his friend ... and for a brief
moment, almost lost himself in another dream ...

... but the pile of carmalized goo before him shook again, as RIP
attempted to regain his senses and freedom ... which brought the Dreamer
back to ARCReality ... this wanton disrespect for "elder ARCers" by the
younger members of the clan was unforgiveable ... and must be dealt with
... _N_O_W_.

Adjusting his black leather trenchcoat on his tall frame, DreamWeaver
pulled the collar up over his neck ... hiding much of his features.  It
was time for DreamMagic ... of the Highest Order!

The ARCrowd huddling from the din in the ARCafeteria watched in amazement
as a breeze picked up in the room, fanning the flames from the fireplace
and billowing Dream's coat about him.  They'd seen him serious, happy,
crazy, and slightly unhinged before ... but they'd never witnessed the
Dreamer when he got down to ARCParty ... 'twas time!::

-----

{DW Note:  I've got to break character here for a second, folks and
explain something.  I tried to enter the Great ARCFoodFight of February,
but that's when my link started acting crazy and some incredibly long
posts hit the bitbucket.  I'm going to try to bring that back now ... but
I'm adlibbing like a son-of-a-gun ... which ain't normal.  I'm more like
RIP:  I write first ... post later ... anyway :D}

-----

(Shadowette calls from the ARCafeteria):

> "OK, everybody, put your Suction Cups on "BURST THE EARDRUM MODE".  
> Let's Party!!!  Dream, you come and lead, now."

"Very well ... I'll _lead_."  DW says.

With a flip of his wrist, a cloud of mist starts to form around the
Dreamer's feet.  With his other hand, he gestures at the door making a
strange V-shaped sign ("Live long and Dream!") ... and the door explodes
across the cafeteria ... hitting the far wall with a resounding

  KKKKKKKKKRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHH!

That echoes across the linoleum.  The mist swirls into the cafeteria ...
quickly covering the entire floor with a couple feet of GroundInvisibility.

At the sound of the explosion, even the conga line's SuctionCups (running
in burstTheEarDrumMode) were overpowered ...

... and the conga line ... Shadowette and Rat in the lead ... came to a
screeching halt.  Shadowette looked over Rat's shoulder and caught sight
of the tall, dark figure standing in the remains of the doorway,
BlackLeatherTrenchCoat billowing about him as the mist swirled around his
boots.  Her shadow paled ... again ...

... Rat's shadow dissappeared altogether.

"So," DreamWeaver spoke, his voice smooth, deep, and resounding, "... you
want to have a FoodFight?  Well ... _F_O_O_D_F_I_G_H_T!"

And with that, DW reached beneath hit coat and produced a
ThompsonSub-MachineSaltedNutRollGun and proceeded to unload clip after
clip in the direction of the conga line ... pelting the wall they were
dancing on with peanuts and nougat.

The line dancers, taken aback by this, were so startled that they forgot
entirely about the QuickReleaseValves on their cups and were simply trying
to protect themselves ... until it occured to them that the Dreamer wasn't
aiming at _them_ ... but rather ... their _feet_.

DreamWeaver, one hand on the Gun ... still firing, reached back into his
coat and produced an oddly-shaped pineapple.  He bit the leaves off and
rolled it in the direction of the conga line, then resumed his
concentration on the SuctionCups and their release valves.  The line
watched in horror as the pineapple started to expand ... turning into a
giant puddle of SemiSolidButterScotchPudding that was growing at every
second ... and looking for all the world like fly paper.

Then the realization hit ... but too late.  Dream had found their
QuickReleaseValves and, one by one, their SuctionCups gave way, sending
them to the floor and the every growing ButterScotchPond.  Each dancer hit
the pudding with an ever increasing

     PLOP ... PPPLLLOOPPP ... SSSPPPLLLOOOSSSHHHHHHH!

until just Shadowette and Rat were left standing on the wall.

Ignoring the mass of SweetBodies rolling in the pudding (well ... not
really.  Dream stopped long enough to toss a WhippedCreamGrenade into the
middle of the pond ... adding a delightful color and fluffiness to the
twisting goo), DW strolled over to the wall where Shadowette (now totally
without her shadow and feeling _very_ naked) and Rat (who was admiring ...
ahhh ... welll ... that's for another group ;) were stuck.

"If you're going to play with the BigBoys, kids ... and you're going to
play with the BigToys ... then ..."

DreamWeaver pulled a minature TaffyPullerSlingShot from his coat and fired
it at Shadowette ... effectively wrapping her hands in taffy and sticking
them to the wall.  A quick burst from the Thompson and one foot's
SuctionCup gave way ... leaving her stuck to the wall by the taffy and her
one remaining Cup ...

... whereupon, he turned his attention to Rat.

"And now, my dear rodent ... what was this about a nice hole you wanted?"

-DreamWeaver
 "When you close your eyes ... do you dream about me?" - NightRanger