From: nelson@reed.edu (Nelson Minar)
Newsgroups: soc.motss
Subject: Ok, my thoughts about the con (was Re: Well, God Damn It!  SPILL THE BEANS!)
Date: 30 Jul 92 03:48:57 GMT
Article-I.D.: reed.1992Jul30.034857.26852
Organization: Reed College, Portland, OR

In article <1992Jul29.135459.14226@watson.ibm.com> jakec@ralvmm.vnet.ibm.com (Jake Coughlin) writes:
>> ....and do *I* have stories to tell about the 'con! :-)
>well, will someone kindly put their fingers to the keyboard and
>tell us some stories?  here it is Wed, and not a peep...

Ok, ok, I'll tell you my impressions. I'm not great at stories,
though, so this will be mostly self-absorbed opinions.

I posted a brief message Thursday night / Friday morning, after the
opening dinner. The point was "gee, motss is really big, and even 60
people are a hell of a lot" - I was feeling disoriented in a crowd of
so many strangers. 

I'm glad to say that my feelings reversed over the weekend, and that I
ended up with a crowd of 60 friends, not 60 strangers.

What made the change? Time, mostly. Time, relaxation, and familiarity.
The high points of the con for me were the picnics at Washington Park
and Rooster Rock. The weather was beautiful, we had wide open spaces
to spread out in, no particular time schedule; plenty of time to lie
in the sun. An imminently civilized way to meet people. (strange
notion of civilization that involves hordes of people, mostly naked,
on a beach by the river.)

Having those mellow periods of acquaintance made the standard
aggressive party things (BBQ at Alan's, dinner at Alexis) much more
enjoyable for me. By the end of the con I felt an intimacy with many
of the people there.

One of the things I've been feeling the need for in the last six
months is to build a wider circle of queer friends. Most of my social
life in Portland revolves around Reed - it's where I work, where I am
a student, and it's the place where I can meet interesting intelligent
people. But Reed's a small place, and there are only about 25 out men
and women here, and frankly I don't feel like I have much in common
with them. This is one of the reasons why I spend so much time on the
net.

I keep meaning to go out and meet more people, whether it be cruising
or going to gay social groups or just hanging out reading a book in a
coffee shop, hoping the man of my dreams starts up an intelligent
conversation about Borges. But that's hard work. You have to go places
to meet people, overcome the problem of not having any basis of
conversation, and even then there's no guarantee that you're likely to
meet someone who shares similar interests. (Yes, I'm aware there's a
certain elitism here).

But the motss.con is near perfect pool of people to meet. How often do
you get a room full of 60 lesbigays, most of whom are computer
competent, educated, and intelligent. Bingo, affinity. I've never been
in a group of so many people that I really wanted to get to know - it
was quite wonderful, and also overwhelming.

My main regret is that time passed the way it did. I'd love to have
had a month to get to know people on a more normal schedule - after 4
days, I was exhausted. But I also realize that the short time was a
primary cause of the social ease with which most of the con
progressed. When people only have 4 days to get to know each other,
they seem to dispense with many of the standard awkward social
actions.

I guess the thing to do now is to wait for the next con. I do hope
that it does not get crammed in with the March on Washington, but is
held as a separate event at a separate time. There'll be time for
motssers to see each other at the MOW. And since feeling of lesbigay
community is a rare event for me, I'd rather separate the week of
queer rights activism fun from the week of motss meetings.
-- 
                __
nelson@reed.edu \/                       Shop as usual and avoid panic buying
Newsgroups: soc.motss