From: zen@death.corp.sun.com (d)
Newsgroups: alt.feminism
Subject: birth control [Was: Re: Choice for men]
Date: 13 Sep 92 23:59:47
Organization: savage hackers
	<1992Sep13.221346.824@cco.caltech.edu> <j-yn0ff.tyger@netcom.com>
NNTP-Posting-Host: death.corp.sun.com
In-reply-to: tyger@netcom.com's message of 14 Sep 92 05:33:01 GMT


In article <j-yn0ff.tyger@netcom.com> tyger@netcom.com (Kitty in the Middle) writes:
> In article <1992Sep13.221346.824@cco.caltech.edu> peri@cco.caltech.edu (Michal Leah Peri) writes:
>>awerling@nmsu.edu (WERLING) writes:
>>>Seems to me the pressure for birth control is about equal...men are
>>>pressured into using condoms and women are pressured into using the
>>>pill.  

  Not quite... it seems to me that you have two basic types of birth
control; one type is one partner's task to ingest, put in, whatever,
that is often done before sex (a pill, iud, diaphram, whatever), and,
most importantly (for the men), doesn't decrease sensitivity or
sensation for the man.  The other kind is the more insidious method --
one that needs to be donned (by either partner) right before the
critical moment (before intercourse or oral sex, if you're a
safe-sex-kind-of-person, which I know you all are...), and affects
sensation and spontaneity.

  Now, if everything were equal, the best thing to use would be the
thing that's the easiest and least invasive for the couple.  For men,
the choice is usually fairly clear -- if at all possible, condoms
(pretty much the only widespread effective option for men, sans surgery)
are not that desirable, for three reasons -- sensation, loss of
spontaneity, and, perhaps best of all, they don't have to hassle with
the details of birth control.  The pill seems to be the easiest to use
and is the least invasive, at least from the man's point of view, but
has various side effects.

  What does this all lead to...?  It seems to me, in my less than vast
experience and perceptions, that during fairly casual sex condoms are
often used, but during longer relationships the burden of birth control
is often placed on the woman's shoulders, er...  well, you know :-)
Note -- I'm not saying that this is the absolute truth!  I'd welcome any
references or stats from anyone, rather than (the typical?)  responses
from men posting and saying "well *I* always use a condom and love it
and my partners have *never* had to use birth control methods...  blah
blah blah."  But since men traditionally have had more power in
relationships, it would seem likely that something as important to them
as the decreased sensitivity of their manhood would be enough of an
issue to put a significant amount of pressure on their partner to take
care of this matter, if possible.

  Anyway, a tiny bit off the birth control track, it also seems that
condoms are becoming more and more popular, thanks to a smorgasbord of
diseases, but I haven't heard if this is causing women to use less of
the "traditional" birth control methods or not.

> [...]
> While I would agree that 
> women are urged to go with the pill, I don't think there is anyone out there
> holding guns to women's heads saying "Ortho-Novum or DEATH!" If the pill
> causes problems for you....use those condoms, whether it's you or your 
> partner!

  I think that there is a great deal of pressure for women to use birth
control methods rather than the man (as I've said, fairly recently, due
to various diseases, this might be shifting.)  Aside from partner
pressure, she also has to live in her body and deal directly with any
consequences of the union, so it becomes an even greater issue.  I don't
know how in general or statistically speaking (if you could measure it)
strong the pressure is from men for the women to bear the
responsibility, but I've heard from men that condoms are no fun,
decrease sensitivity, etc., and hence don't use them much more than with
women; women are speaking out more now, I think, but still using the
same ol' methods.

  Of course, from reading this newsgroup, it seems that men are so loath
to take on any kind of responsibility at all that I'm not at all
surprised that there aren't other effective options for men than what
currently exists.

 -- d