HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: madhaus@netcom.com (Maddi Hausmann)
Subject: Dan the Debator
Organization: Society for Putting Things on Top of Other Things
Date: Sat, 10 Oct 1992 03:06:05 GMT

I got ahold of some of Dan's 3x5 cards...

------------------------------------------
ENVIRONMENT

Economy needs jobs, not spotted owls.
Even Jack Kennedy knew this.

------------------------------------------
ABORTION

Very difficult question; thought long
and hard over it, no easy answers.
   REPEAT THIS AND NOTHING ELSE!!  JAB3

------------------------------------------
ECONOMY

5 quarters of growth, Recession Over.
Intel building new potatoe chip factory.

------------------------------------------
THE DRAFT

I served my country with honor and dignity,
which cannot be said for Presidential
candidate.

DAN, DO NOT ATTACK *GORE* ON ISSUE!  JAB3

------------------------------------------
FAMILYE VALUES

We feel that the family is the bedrock of
America, and that family is the Flinstones.
<wait for laugh> But seriously, we want to
be more like the Flinstones and less like
the Simpsones.

------------------------------------------
EDUCATION

I was raised in the public school system
and I have learned well.  If I lose this
debate, that's an argument in favor of
SCHOOL VOUCHERS.  Then every boy and girl
would be prepared for the Vice-Presidential
debates.

------------------------------------------
CRIME

The Republican Party believes in Law and
Order, not Slick Willie...Horter.


------------------------------------------
NAFTA (TRADE) (MEXICO)

We believe in free trade and fair trade.
This will create 30 MILLION new jobs.
In this country, not Mexico.  30 MILLION
JOBS.  30 MILLION.  30 MILLION SERVED.

------------------------------------------
WETLANDS

I love the environment, and I want to
discuss my new proposal to create new
parks and recreational areas.  You know
how much I love parks.  (Golf)

DO NOT SAY GOLF!  JAB3
------------------------------------------

-- 
Maddi Hausmann                madhaus@netcom.com
Humorist, Satirist, Tech Writer.  Take your pick.

Centigram Communications Corp, San Jose California  408/428-3553
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle,alt.fan.rush-limbaugh
From: sieferme@stein.u.washington.edu (Eric Sieferman)
Subject: Re: A Technical Request
Organization: University of Washington, Seattle
Date: Fri, 9 Oct 1992 23:49:19 GMT

In article <UepRTlO00YV9Q3phoU@andrew.cmu.edu> kb4c+@andrew.cmu.edu (Karin Brennan) writes:
>
> williams@herky.cs.uiowa.edu (Kent Williams) says of R.L.:
>
>  < He is a self serving egotist who has no real agenda other than baiting
>   <   liberals and making money.
>
>I agree with you 100%.  
>My question is- What's wrong with it?  What do you think Phil Donahue
>does for a living?

He makes just slightly less of an ass of himself than
Rush Lameboy, but only slightly.

>Also, What's wrong with making money?  Is it really
>the root of all evil?  

Who said anything about the root of all evil?
If Rush would come on the air and say, "I really don't believe
a tenth of the swill I'm spreading.  Thanks for the
money, suckers", I would have more respect for him; of course,
I have no respect for him now, so this wouldn't be hard.

>I think it's time to dust off your copy of "Atlas Shrugged"  (Ayn Rand)
>and  see what direction we're heading.

As someone who has read nearly every word published by
Ayn Rand (and has deep serious disagreements with her),
it's amazing to me to see her placed in any context with
Rush Lymphnode.  Without wanting to put words into her
mouth (since she's dead, this would be disgusting)
I can't imagine someone who claimed to be dedicated
to the cause of Reason would want to be associated
with a reckless buffoon like ol' Rush.

But, I departed from the Randroids long ago, 
so I could be wrong.

>Respectfully,
>kb


-- 
| Eric Sieferman            |    sieferme@u.washington.edu          |
| U. of W., M.C.I.S.        |    (206) 685-3104                     |
Date: Wed, 7 Oct 1992 20:12:59 EDT
From: Kurt Ludwick <KEL111@psuvm.psu.edu>
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: debates

In article <cass8806.299@elan.glassboro.edu>, cass8806@elan.glassboro.edu (KYLE
CASSIDY) says:

>i can barely wait to see our boy dan take on al gore in the debate.

Ditto.

>any thoughts on who might win?

Most expect Gore to massacre Quayle.  I expect Quayle to destroy Gore, by
simply quoting his book and exposing him for the wacko-environmentalist
liberal he is.

At least, I -hope- he makes it perfectly clear that not all scientists
believe 'the sky is falling', as Chicken Little Gore would have us believe.

Watch for an upset.

------------
Kurt Ludwick
------------
From: jamaass@bluemoon.rn.com (Jeffrey A. Maass)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: alt.fan.mary-matalin (?)
Date: 16 Oct 92 17:17:30 GMT
Organization: Blue Moon BBS ((614) 868-998[024])

Is this alt.fan.mary-matalin? I ** love ** the way reporters keep
trying to push cameras up her dress (after the Veep and last Presidential
debates in the "spin room")!

If you missed it, you need to watch the debates on C-SPAN!

Is the "designated attack-bitch" female, or is (s)he a Republican In 
Drag? What's the relationship between the Prez and Mary? Is there more
than a coincidence that Barbara Bush and Mary Matalin have never been 
seen shopping together at a Washington 7-11? Could there be some
cat-fight jealousy here?

I think we need to discuss this Most-Important-Shrew in a forum of it's
own!


Jeff Maass                   Amateur Radio: K8ND (@ W8CQK)
NW of Columbus Ohio                Netmail: jamaass@bluemoon.uucp

GILLETTE'S PRINCIPLE:
  "If you want to make people angry, lie. If you want to make
   them absolutely livid with rage, tell the truth."
From: erics@infoserv.com (Eric S. Smith)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: Debate Results, my opinion.
Date: Thu, 15 Oct 92 15:39:05 PDT
Organization: Reigning Cats and Dogs
Reply-To: erics@infoserv.com
X-Mailer: uAccess - Macintosh Release: 1.6v1


leisti@klaava.Helsinki.FI (Teemu Leisti) writes:

> >>I seem to remember a token meeting between The Shrub and Gorby in '88 in New
> >>York for the General Assembly opening, but I could be wrong.  In any case, I
> >>wouldn't characterize such a casual contact as 'knowing' each other...

> > In the Biblical sense? :-)

> Now you've blown it!  The most closely kept secret of the Cold War!

I think we're on to something here. Wasn't it Bush himself, in describing
his relationship with Ronald Reagan, who said something like:

"Over the course of eight years, we have had trials, we have had failures,
we have had sex."

-----
Eric Smith
erics@infoserv.com
CI$: 70262,3610
From: bill@cognet.ucla.edu (William M. Eldridge)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: Debate
Date: 15 Oct 92 18:49:38 GMT
Organization: UCLA Cognitive Science Research Program

sg@monsoon.com (Sunil Gupta) writes:

>Among the many lies, distortions and verbal meanderings, there
>are two that I'd like to comment upon. First of all, when the
>Vice-Potatoe-Head was drooling about Clinton's supposedly
>duplicitous stance on abortion, he states "one thing I don't think
>it's wise to do, and that is to change your position." So now

I think this was quoted out of context - the question had to 
do with the Kama Sutra and the 42 ways for pleasing your partner.
Mixing and matching the 42 has caused much of the moral decay
we're witnessing today - not Gore's "do you support the woman's
right to choose?" - the Kama Sutra specifically calls for 
the man to choose, and to suffer the humiliation should he
make a poor choice.

>BTW, did anyone else notice Perot's comment on Sun. night that
>"people cannot be programmed like objects"? I think this is a
>clear indication that he's aware of, if not actually an
>advocate of, Object-Oriented Programming. Perhaps a programmer

Perot of course is lying.  Anyone with the slightest acquaintance
with the human species knows that humans in their natural state
are completely programmed.  Read up on Gurdjieff if you need
more info.  Or just observe.
-- 
{{{{ bill eldridge                                       x                }}}}
{{{{ bill@cognet.ucla.edu    310-206-3960               xxx              }}}}
{{{{ ~more, ~better, ~faster [80's motto]                x              }}}}
{{{{ ~hot, ~toxic, and ~shallow [90's motto]                              }}}}
From: elendil@mintir.new-orleans.la.us (Edward J. Branley)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: Shrill and Obnoxious
Date: Wed, 14 Oct 92 21:59:54 CDT
Organization: Minas Tirith BBS (Public Access Usenet for New Orleans)

jdahl@rchland.vnet.ibm.com (Jared Dahl) writes:

>
> Dan is now officially, IMHO, an average, devious little weasel.
>

I beg to differ.  Baker and his ilk are the devious ones.  Our Boy doesn't have
the brains to be devious.

As to the weasel part, yup.



|Edward J. Branley         elendil@mintir.new-orleans.la.us|
|Seashell Software, Metairie, LA            +1-504-455-5087|
From: trif@bike.rad.washington.edu (To Run In Fear)
Subject: Re: The Veep Debate
Organization: University of Washington, Seattle WA
Date: Wed, 14 Oct 1992 11:52:14 GMT

In article <1992Oct14.021150.1207@netcom.com> madhaus@netcom.com (Maddi Hausmann) writes:
   Peter Jennings, the ABC network commentator, mentioned that several
   of the charges made in the debate were inaccurate, and to check your
   newspapers tomorrow.  Here are a few items that Quayle and Gore did
   not see eye to eye on; let's see how many of these were bad calls by
   Our Boy.

   Q: [later, same topic} Did you tell those folks in Nashville about
       your $150 billion tax increase?
   G:  There is not a $150 billion tax increase.
   Q:  Yes there is.

Offset by a tax cut of a little over $100 billion for the middle class.
Net $50 billion tax increase.

   Q:  Now, the Caribbean Basin Initiative, which, by the way, you voted
       for, Senator Gore...
   G:  I did not.  I voted against it.
   Q:  You voted for it.
   G:  I did not.

The CNN Truth Squad guy says he looked it up and Gore voted against the
CBI.

   Q:  Now, in your book, on page 304, you ask for a program that will
       require $100 billion in foreign aid for environmental programs.
   G:  That is not in my book.
   Q:  Yes it is.  I was going to bring a copy here, and now I see why
       I should have.
   G:  There is nothing in my book about our paying for other countries'
       environmental projects...that refers to joint efforts.

CNN Truth Squad guy says he looked up page 304---Our Boy apparently lied
again.

   Other observations:

      The candidates were asked how they felt about the sleaze level
      of the campaign.  Gore said he abhored it, and gave an example
      of a sleaze tactic Bush pulled (the Moscow trip).  Quayle responded
      by bashing Clinton for not telling the truth about a lot of things.

Ah, but you missed the good part.  Quayle began his opening statement by
grinning and saying something like, "Anybody who wants to know how I feel
about personal attacks should read my press clippings for the last four years."

   However, very little of what he said was in support of either himself
   or the top of the ticket.  His opening statement, in its entirity, was
   an attack on Clinton.  So was most of his closing.  The only accomplishment
   he mentioned was in negotiating with President Aquino during the coup 
   attempt in the Phillipines.  

Yes, it was obvious that his mission tonight was to attack Clinton and paint
him as a liar.

In Al Gore's opening statement, he used the "deer in the headlights"
metaphor in describing the Bush-Quayle administration's response to the
economic situation.  Is this a phrase that has been used out in the real
world or did he maybe pick it up from the net?
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: sysmatt@aix3090b.uky.edu (Matt Simpson)
Subject: Re: Danny boy with marijuana?
Organization: University Of Kentucky, Dept. of Math Sciences
Date: Fri, 9 Oct 1992 07:49:24 GMT
Distribution: na

The individual in prison who claims he sold cocaine to Dan Quayle is named
Brett Kimberlin. Considering the circumstances, I think his credibility is
extremely shaky, at best. 
As others have mentioned, the real issue is not whether he actually sold
drugs to Danny, or even met Danny on any occasion. The issue is the          
administration's illegal, unconstitutional use of the prison system to 
silence him, rather than letting the charges live or die on their own
merits.
Shortly before he was scheduled to talk to reporters, he was placed in
solitary confinement, and denied access to the reporters. There was no
valid disciplinary reason for this. I forget the prison officials' excuse,
but it was very flimsy. If memory serves correctly, there was also evidence
of communication between the prison officials and the Quayle folks.
I don't care whether Danny did drugs or not. But abusing the prison system 
to silence his accuser, even if the accuser is lying, is inexcusable.
--
This signature file exists because our crappy newsreader won't work without it.
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: train@gvls2.gvl.unisys.com (Herbert Rutledge)
Subject: Bush is a traitor?
Keywords: Alien and sedition act, passports, cocktails
Organization: Paramax Systems Corporation, Paoli PA
Date: Fri, 9 Oct 1992 14:20:35 GMT




  "It's time for the story to finally come out.  A friend of mine told
   me that on the night of August 14th, 1969, he observed George Bush
   at the roof-top cocktail lounge of the Hotel Washington, on 15th
   Street in the District of Columbia, order and then consume a Black
   Russian.  Larry, I don't want to tell you what I really think because
   I don't have the facts.  But to go and drink a Black Russian one year
   after Russia crushed Czechoslovakia, not remembering who you saw at
   the Hotel Washington ... I'm just saying, level with the American
   people."


   [Your Name Here] on "Larry King Live" 


--
 _________________________________________________________________________
|                                 |                                       |
| Herbert Rutledge, aka Train     |                                       |
| Paramax Systems Corporation     | "To post is human; to flame, divine." |
| Valley Forge Labs, M/S GVL-3    |                                       |
| P.O. Box 517, Paoli, PA  19301  |                     ---Alexander Pope |
| Internet: train@.gvl.unisys.com |                                       |
|_________________________________|_______________________________________|

Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: patrick@is.rice.edu (Patrick L Humphrey)
Subject: Re:  History of D.C.
Summary: How the 'Skins got to be where they are, wherever it is 
Keywords: Columbia, District O', NFC East
Organization: Rice University
Distribution: na
Date: Tue, 13 Oct 1992 23:58:08 GMT

In article <1992Oct13.193058.21131@gvl.unisys.com> train@gvls2.gvl.unisys.com (Herbert Rutledge) writes:
>In article <Bw2LnL.ItH@rice.edu>, patrick@is.rice.edu (Patrick L Humphrey) writes:
>|> In article <1992Oct13.165404.14885@gvl.unisys.com>, train@gvls2.gvl.unisys.com (Herbert Rutledge) writes:
>|> >
>|> > Oops!  I forgot the most important event in the history of the D. O' C.:
>|> >
>|> >
>|> >    1912 - Boston Redskins move franchise to Washington.
>|> 
>|> Try 1937.  The NFL didn't even exist until 1921.  (Hey, you could be the
>|> next candidate to replace Mr. Potatoe Head...:-)
>|> 
>|> -- 
>|> Patrick L. Humphrey  (patrick@is.rice.edu)  Rice Networking & Computing Systems
>|>    
>
>  What's your source?  The story I got was from my grandparents.  The team
>  was moved from Boston before World War I (true, there was no organized league
>  back then, but there were professional and semi-professional teams).  The
>  team expired shortly thereafter, and when it was revived sometime later the
>  name "Redskins" was re-used (both the Minneapolis and Dallas baseball teams
>  used to be "Washington Senators" in a previous life - just ask Shirley
>  MacLaine).  You don't mean to tell me that grandparents would tell a lie?  
>  How absolutely corrosive to family values!  }8-) 
>
I'm using the NFL's own Record Manual (several years, no less) as my source
-- there may have been a Washington Redskins semi-pro team back then, but
the Boston Redskins were the first pro team to inherit the name, and they
didn't move to Washington until 1937.  (Your grandparents may have been
thinking of that semi-pro squad, which has nothing in common with the
current franchise beyond the nickname...)

--PLH (who cares?  We got the Oilers down here...:-)


-- 
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: jdahl@rchland.vnet.ibm.com (Jared Dahl)
Subject: Re: Vice Shrub Won.
Date: Thu, 15 Oct 1992 15:03:06 GMT
Disclaimer: This posting represents the poster's views, not necessarily those of IBM
Organization: IBM Rochester

In article <2FsosB1w165w@mintir.new-orleans.la.us>, elendil@mintir.new-orleans.la.us (Edward J. Branley) writes:
|> peri@cco.caltech.edu (Michal Leah Peri) writes:
|> 
|> > elendil@mintir.new-orleans.la.us (Edward J. Branley) writes:
|> >
|> > >BTW, I wouldn't sweat the election.  Even His Rushness conceded today.
|> >
|> >
|> > OOoh!  Tell me more!                                  --  Michal
|> 
|> Well, there's not much to it.  Uncle Rush admitted there is little hope, and
|> that we were in for four years of unchecked liberalism.

And he's happier than hell about it.  Now he is,
unquestionably, the most well known and popular
spewer of republican trash in the country.  Oh 
great!  At least Bush was somewhat of a moderate.
I will miss our little potatoe!

Jared "NOT" Dahl
-- 
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
| Jared Dahl             | "My heart is human, my blood is boiling, | 
| Systems Programmer     |  my brain IBM"                           |
| IBM - Rochester, MN    |              -- STYX,  "Mr. Roboto"      |
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Opinions expressed are mine, not IBM's.
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: madhaus@netcom.com (Maddi Hausmann)
Subject: Re: debates
Organization: Society for Putting Things on Top of Other Things 
Date: Thu, 8 Oct 1992 22:13:08 GMT

In article <92281.201259KEL111@psuvm.psu.edu> Kurt Ludwick <KEL111@psuvm.psu.edu> writes:
>In article <cass8806.299@elan.glassboro.edu>, cass8806@elan.glassboro.edu (KYLE
>CASSIDY) says:
>
>>i can barely wait to see our boy dan take on al gore in the debate.
>
>Most expect Gore to massacre Quayle.  I expect Quayle to destroy Gore, by
>simply quoting his book and exposing him for the wacko-environmentalist
>liberal he is.

That can't happen, remember.  No props.  That means Dan-oe can't
quote from the book.  And we know he's no good at closed-book exams.

>At least, I -hope- he makes it perfectly clear that not all scientists
>believe 'the sky is falling', as Chicken Little Gore would have us believe.

I guess he's in with the scientists who told him about the canals
on Mars.  Some Doctor E.E. Smith, I think.

>Watch for an upset.

The only upset will be your mood after the debate when we 
throw your statements back at you.


-- 
Maddi Hausmann                madhaus@netcom.com
Humorist, Satirist, Tech Writer.  Take your pick.

Centigram Communications Corp, San Jose California  408/428-3553
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: liuyh@vis.toronto.edu (Yuanhui Liu)
Subject: Re: }8-)
Keywords: Deer Headlights Potatoe Debate
Organization: Department of Computer Science, University of Toronto
Date: 16 Oct 92 20:45:47 GMT

In article <1992Oct16.181624.6440@odin.corp.sgi.com> lana@magenta.corp.sgi.com (Lana Mountford) writes:
>In article <5395@sumax.seattleu.edu>, sstover@sumax.seattleu.edu (Maven o'Mirth) writes:
>|> 
>|> Quayle did come off better than I expected him to, but he was bumbling and
>|> blithering and babbling by 15 minutes in, and his outright lies were
>|> almost pitiful in their desperation and obvious hypocrisy.  Poor critter. 
>|> He just doesn't belong there.
>|> 
>
>The most vivid image I have of the VP debates is Danny's flailing
>about with this hands, an affectation he has obviously picked up
>from his boss.  It looked like a bad imitation of Dana Carvey
>doing his SNL impersonation of the Prez.  :-)
>
I totally agree on the hand motion thing.  :-)

that's it, Wayne & Garth '92!  
>-- 
>
>-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
>|    /)                      | Lana Mountford    
>|   / /  __    ___    __     |   
>|__(_/__(__)\__/  )__(__)\__ |  
>-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=


Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: dward@scf.nmsu.edu (Dan Ward)
Subject: The Woozels are coming
Organization: New Mexico State University
X-Newsreader: TIN [version 1.1 PL6]
Date: Thu, 8 Oct 1992 00:21:35 GMT


  Just heard that Bush was telling Californian that they wouldn't
  have any food or water if they voted for Clinton/Gore.  It seems
  to me we should take this to it's logical conclusion.  I.e.,
  "An inside source at the White House today has confirmed that 
   Elephants, Tigers and other types of Woozels will seek out and
   trample the homes of everyone who votes for Clinton/Gore. "
   The inside source also confirms that Aliens from outside the
   universe will be on hand to barbecue the entire planet Earth
   if Clinton/Gore wins."

   I'm sure it's true.  I heard it on TV.
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: horntho@eng.auburn.edu (Thomas J. Horn)
Subject: Re: bumperstickers
Reply-To: horntho@eng.auburn.edu
Organization: Auburn University Engineering
Date: Thu, 8 Oct 1992 03:15:23 GMT

Speaking of bumper stickers, has anyone *really* taken a serious look at the 
bumper sticker for Bush/Quayle?? I noticed quite a few of them last weekend,
and one thing seems to stand out: The stickers were designed so that the normal
human eye can only see "BUSH" from a distance of more than two car lengths or so
away. The name of Bush's ijit running mate is so dark against the dark blue 
background that it is nearly invisible. Think that ol' Georgie is trying to 
pretend that Dannikins isn't part of the ticket or something? Or is he trying 
to continue the seemingly endless game of "hide-the-sausage" he's been pulling
on the American people for the past four years??
 
Something to think about.

---Tom
From: sg@monsoon.com (Sunil Gupta)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: Undercurrent of Panic
Date: Fri, 09 Oct 92 11:14:54 EDT
Organization: Monsoon Software, Inc.

cfthb@ux1.cts.eiu.edu (Howard Black) writes:

> In article <1992Oct8.143328.26592@murdoch.acc.Virginia.EDU> pat@sphinx.phys.V
> >Cindy Kandolf writes:
> >
> >>Daniel A Ashlock writes:
> >>>   Did you see the nitwit who is trying to make something of
> >                     ^^^^^^
> >>>Clinton's student trip to Moscow?  Not on UseNet, but out in
> >>>what we whimsically refer to as reality?
> >
> >Apparently, as of yesterday, the nitwit to whom you refer goes by the name
> >George Herbert Walker Bush.
> 
>     Who, just last week, dismissed the incident as inconsequential to the
> election.  No doubt a desperate act by a desperate candidate (to steal a
> phrase from the Clinton camp).

As detailed by the Clinton/Gore campaign in The Washington Post yesterday,
this is part of the Bush/Quayle campaign's attempt to lift the whole
John Major/Tory Party strategy and transplant it here in the States.
The Tory campaign's major tactical moves were to:

    1) Lie about their opponents fiscal policy with regard to taxation
    2) Portray their opponents as communist sympathizers during the
       Cold War
    3) Repeat ad nauseum the belief that the status quo would prevail

Sound familiar? Poor Joe Biden got hung out to dry for paraphrasing parts
of a Neil Kinnock speech. I think these bastards should be crucified.


Sunil Gupta
Monsoon Software, Inc.
sg@monsoon.com