Organization: City University of New York/ University Computer Center
Date: Monday, 13 Apr 1992 18:18:23 EDT
From: <SECBH@CUNYVM.BITNET>
Newsgroups: talk.religion.misc
Subject:    re: Gay teens, suicide, and Christianity

In article <gduOZMG00Vor0L1URW@andrew.cmu.edu>,
vm0h+@andrew.cmu.edu (Vincent J. Matsko) writes:

>Statistics now show that gay teens are three times as likely as their
>non-gay counterparts to commit suicide (I apologize for not having a
>reference, but it was newsworthy several weeks ago).  Many of these were
>partly a result of intolerant, ostensibly Christian attitudes at home,
>resulting in rejection, being kicked out of the house, etc.
>
>How is the issue to be addressed?  How are teens to be counseled? A
>"loving the sinner but rejecting the sin" approach advocated by many who
>believe homsexuality to be wrong may sound great in theory, but this
>underlying and detectable rejection may be the straw that breaks a
>teen-ager's back.
>
>In particular, how would those who believe homosexuality to be wrong
>counsel a son or daughter they found out to be gay or lesbian? What
>steps would such people take to prevent their son or daughter from
>becoming another statistic?

My own parents were counseled "Never let him think that you accept under
any circumstances," and they made this the cynosure of our family
relationship.  No day passed, no telephone call, no letter in which
they did not emphatically state their disapproval of the fact I was
one of "them" and to dwell on how this failing was destroying all of
_their_ happiness and ruining _their_ lives.

Nor was I allowed to escape the knowledge that I was the recipient of
endless prayers to the deity on my behalf to rescue me from this
abominable condition -- and lest I forget -- I was given written notices
of their supplications.

The effect of these Christian attentions resulted in two suicide
attempts in two years requiring hospitalizations requiring both
wrists to be stitched back up one time and the vein in one forearm
to be patched together on the other.

I would offer my bloody sheets as truer relics of the Christian faith
than Veronica's kerchief or Turin's winding cloths.

Evidently construing this as victory about to be snatched from the
jaws of defeat my parents renewed their loving of the sinner while
detesting his sin, which attention resulted in a third hospitalization
for a near fatal overdose of pills.

In a stroke of genius my father then determined that "this" (my
being one of "them") was simply never to be mentioned or referred
to in even the most tangental way.

This seeming boon then resulted in my being harangued and constantly
blamed because "you never tell us anything about your life."  However,
the ban on mentioning "it" did not extend to letters, which never
failed to mention "it" and to plead that I would "get better", nor
did the prayer petition notifications abate.

Having failed to become a martyr by my own hand to the Christian faith
of my parents, I did set about to examine this particular lapse as
a good and obedient child of their god.

I learned four things which I encourage every gay boy or girl to
take to his or her heart and never let go if they have Christian
parents like mine:

1. Any person who values a religion above the respect and kindness which
   every human being deserves is unspeakably depraved and should have
   no place in your life whatsoever - and the moreso if such perverts
   are your own parents.  Love as a noun is meaningless, love as a
   verb is obvious.  If someone acts as your enemy, they are your enemy.

2. Your life as a gay man or lesbian far outstips the worth of any
   religion and renders any religion that attacks you on the basis
   of your sexual orientation worthless of consideration.

3. Question every value and every system of belief of anyone who rejects
   you based on your sexual orientation, and reject any of their values
   and systems of belief that generate and support this judgement.
   This will result in ridding you of the immediate influence of
   Christianity and Judaism, both of which are cesspools of ignorance
   and phantasy and hothouses for the plagues of hatreds for which
   mankind has butchered his fellows.

   Trust no one who practices the Christian or Jewish religions until
   they prove to your satisfaction that they have recognized the
   evils in the very hearts of these religions and have cut these
   cancers out of their own religious views and practices.
   These are religions of intolerance and power, and they are obsessed
   with punishment, bloodshed and death.  Anyone who claims to be
   a Christian or a Jew and cannot or will not demonstrate that he
   has repudiated the power-lusting part of his heritage is an
   assassin poised to rip your throat open as a sacrifice to his
   blood-drinking god.

4. Be grateful for being what you are and proud that you have survived
   a religion and a family that sought to crush you even to the point
   of death.  By your suffering and your blood you shame every cross in
   every church ever built.  By surviving you have won the only life
   that matters -- you own.

To any parent who cannot love his gay son or lesbian daughter
as gay or lesbian and cherish and protect them from the evil which
will attack them from every side, I say sing your hymns and pray
your prayers and strangle the life out of such offspring with your
very own hands that you may fully honor and glorify your god as he
is written of in your holy scriptures.  As your god debauched himself
in the murder of his son, how should you tremble and fail to cover
yourself in the blood of your own offspring in his name.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Jack Carroll               "When your death makes a gesture to you,
<SECBH@CUNYVM>              an enormous weight of triviality drops away."

                                                       Don Juan