From: mba2@Rosie.UH.EDU (Puneet_S)
Subject: Re: Long hair and closemindedness (Was looking for attention?)
Reply-To: mba2@Rosie.UH.EDU
Organization: University of Houston
Distribution: na
Date: Mon, 12 Oct 1992 22:55:40 GMT

>Of course, the long hair is just scalp-deep.  But it is so much fun
>to be young and muscular, walk about slowly tanning in the warmth of the sun
>without a shirt, grow and shave goatees, moustaches, and five-o'clock shadows, 
>hang out in cafes with strange and interesting people, ride motorcycles,
>ogle, dance.  This sensual, young lifestyle is ever the sweeter if you
>have ever been an ugly duckling.
>
>....To comprehend a nectar
>   Requires sorest need. ...
>
>And long hair is very, very sensual.

As a matter of fact, I have tried a similar tactic with a beard and found
that more of the young ladies fing is distinguishing.  It sets a person
apart from the norm.  I wouldn't say is is sensual.  I've had it long 
in the back, long up front, shaved all around.  As long as it's different,
people see you as an individual.  That I think is the key.  

>
>Sumitro:
>
>>I don't mind kids trying to get
>attention/appreciation by peers, adults also do that. But why not try
>getting this attention by becoming athletic, good in studies, arts, etc,
>instead of gimmicks like long hair, ear-rings, etc.<
>
>Spoken like a true parent!  Bravo!  "Beta, why don't you study instead of
>filling your head with such nonsense?"
>
>Nobody claims that long hair and good grades are mutually exclusive (except
>for my parents, but they'll come around in good time :-) ).  Nobody says
>that being a good student is not to be strived for.
>
>However, what irks me is that members of the II generation generally approach
>the question from the negative standpoint: Why do you _have_ to do this evil, 
>rather than Why do you do this action?  In other words, the implicit
>assumption is that growing long hair, getting a stylish haircut, going dancing,
>riding a motorcycle, dating, ad infinitum ... is an EVIL, and you are being
>stubborn in not trying to FULFILL YOUR INFANTILE NEED FOR ATTENTION through
>some means which is MORE SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE.

I agree 100%.  As a matter of fact my mother did the same.  My father
on the other hand gave me the "Beta..." line.  In college a person should
fulfil all the "infantile" desires and do all the stupid /crazy things
possible.  Go skining /sky diving /mountain-biking down the side of
mountain /white water rafting /etc... When you get to working, and have to
answer to 7-5 job with only 2 week of vacation a year and have to wear
a suit & tie and be "responible" it's a lot harder to be "crazy".  Lord,
know i've tried.  But, somehow I don't think I could go to work with
only one side of my face shaved......

>
>Sumitro:
>
>>Ok, I concede. One gimmick is no better and no worse than other.
>Still, I think "gimmicks" (or fashion) are usually to get +ve [positive]
>attention. Contact Lenses, Plastic surgery, make-up, make people
>attractive to others. But long hair? I know these are very subjective
>things, but I have a feeling that guys with long hair/ear-rings
>go for -ve [negative] attention (notoriety) maybe because some attention
>(even -ve [negative]) is perhaps better to them than no attention.<

People come on,  they are not gimmicks.... They are an expression of
a young persons feeling/craziness.  Leave it at that...

>
>If I were to walk around in my hometown of Saratoga with a punk hairstyle,
>black leather, and chains, I would be asking for attention.  If I were
>to do that at UC Berkeley, I would still receive attention but not nearly
>as much.
>
>These standards are relative.  They are NOT fixed.  Prejudice against people
>who look or dress differently simply based on those appearances is a form
>of mental blinders.  Yes, I waited until after my job interview in San Jose
>to grow long hair; in this economy, who needs to lower his chances of being
>hired?  
>
>Purna:
>
>> as for the ear-rings....i have BOTH my ears pierced, as do my father
>and grandfather before me.  originally, i got one pierced in college
>on a bet (yes, we HAD been drinking).  anyway, i told my folks and
>my father asked "only one?  go get the other one pierced also.  it's
>bad luck to only have one pierced!".  before i got it done, many
>people i knew tried "peer-pressure" to get me to NOT to get my ear
>pierced.  go figure. <
>

Ahhhh.... I recall a similar experience......Hmmmmmm.... yes I think
there were three tequila shots involved...Me and a bud (last semester
of College) going to the Mall and getting "Lightning Bolts".  ........
Dad's reaction:  "You will not wear that in my house, take it out now!!!"
Oh yeah, that was a fun day in my household.
Mom's reaction:  "But son, if you're going to do one, you must do the
other."  It seems that we pundits are not men untill we have both our
ears pierced and go through a ritual where we are ejected from the
house and are required to live on the street as a beggar for a week.
Amusing...... I may just have to try that....

>Purna's experience shows how gender roles are also not absolute.  In
>his case, he and his male relatives have adopted earrings in both ears,
>which traditional American culture associates with femininity.  I know
>several sailors who sport small gold earrings who would be glad
>to beat the sh*t out of anyone calling them feminine.
>

>Sumitro:
>
>>While we are at it, how about extending the list from long hair to other
>things "typically" associated with feminine appearance, eg; applying
>lipsticks, wearing skirts/saris/(other "feminine" dresses)
>   How would you feel about guys wearing "feminine" dresses?<

Sorry, being a Tim Allen grunting male....NOT!
>
>The REAL impetus for growing long hair was this:
>
>Amirthi:
>
>>What are you implying?  That women would find them unattractive?
>   Maybe we should take a poll...how many women here find guys with long
>hair attractive?  Is it a turn-on or a turn-off?
>   I don't have much of an opinion one way or the other...but most of the
>guys I've met with long hair have been fairly attractive.<
>
>:-)  It should come as no surprise to you that college students are interested
>in the opposite sex, and that sexuality guides many choices of personal
>appearance.  I can't say for conservative states like Texas, where most
>males wear short-cropped hair, but in Berkeley at least, a significant
>number of women find long-haired men attractive.  It's variously perceived as
>different, stylish, hippie, individualist, or "English major."  Whatever.
>I like long hair just as I prefer Mocha Almond Fudge over Vanilla ;-).

Excuse me,  I'm from Texas.  At least the last time I checked.. You haven't
some of my musically inclined or liberal arts or heck physics frineds...
They aren't any different than what you described.


>From: hdeshma@eos.ncsu.edu (HARSHAVARDHAN  DESHMANE)
>
>>i dont think, personal appearance should be anybody else's problem..it's a 
>choice. Come to think of it, if everyone was dressed the same, it would
>make a boring world.<

Yep, but wait till you get into the real world.. things ain't as rosy.
Maybe you can find what you want...

>Manish
>
>                                          /-\o /-()  -- -  --   -
>   Manish Vij    ::    '89 EX500          \_/ \\/ )  -- -    --
>   mvij@ocf.berkeley.edu                       |/_\  -- -  --   - 
>                                                \_/.  .  . . ........
VCD,  Puneet (D-Poon) 
 
              {:-()  EveryOne's Entitled to your Opinion  ()-:}