From: lou@hpkslx.mayfield.HP.COM (Lou Kvitek)
Newsgroups: alt.business.multi-level
Subject: Re: Yup, Amways... misc.consumers
Date: 2 Nov 92 23:29:39 GMT
Organization: HP Response Center Lab

In misc.consumers, jfurr@nyx.cs.du.edu (Joel Furr) writes:


> I live in Blacksburg, Virginia.  I'm a graduate student, holding down a
> graduate assistantship at Virginia Tech.  I make enough to keep myself fed
> and clothed and am reasonably happy.  Yet, once or twice every two weeks,
> I get called from these strangers who tell me that they're friends of some
> person I've never heard of who apparently considers himself a good friend
> of mine.  Often these people use the same presumably mythical friend, so
> perhaps they all bought the same mailing list from the same guy.  The
> pitch that follows invariably goes like this:  "I have this business, and
> I'm always looking for people to help out.  We work with all these
> multinational corporations, acting as their local vendors, and we make big
> bucks.  How'd you like an interview?"  I then say "Is this Amway?"  They
> then say "Er, um," and spend about 90 seconds hedging in one way or
> another before admitting that yes, it is.  At that point I say "well,
> then, I'm not interested, thank you for calling."

> I'm sort of interested in how long it takes them to get around to the fact
> that this is Amway.  Too bad I can't stand listening to the sales spiel
> and always have to go and spoil the suspense.  I've heard from friends of
> mine who were dense enough to actually show up for one of these
> "interviews" that they're actually meetings with several other prospective
> patsies and one or two highpowered local entrepreneur-type nutcases, and
> that you usually make it through the first meeting and on into the second
> before they volunteer the information that this is Amway.

> The first guy I had try to sign me up contacted me over a local computer
> network.  He sent me mail out of the blue saying "hi, I've got this
> company, and we're local vendors for all these massive companies, and
> we're making big bucks, and would you like an interview?"  I replied, "no,
> thanks."  He replied "we'll be down at Wendy's on Sunday at 4 pm, come by
> for your interview."  I replied "no, thanks, I'm working then."  He
> replied "well, we'll be there until 8, come on by for your interview."  I
> said, "no, thanks."  He replied, "we're looking forward to you coming by
> for your interview."  I replied "Sorry, I'm not interested."  He replied
> "We'll see you on Sunday."  This went on for quite a while with me
> politely refusing his kind offers and watching to see how long it would
> go, never dreaming that this was actually ScAmway.  When he finally gave
> up, I forgot about it until I saw a local news posting from him to someone
> else that talked about how much he enjoyed working for Amway.  I said "You
> _bastard_.  Not only would you not give up on getting me to come down for
> an interview, but throughout it all you carefully concealed who the F***
> it was this was really with.  You dishonest son-of-a-bitch."  Things went
> downhill from there.  

> Ever since then I've been a ScAmway watcher, laughing at their confusion
> when I catch them napping by asking "Is this Amway?"  I also like their
> canned sales pitches that are carefully planned to appear spontaneous.  I
> think that the local ScAmway people have my picture and phone number on a
> wall somewhere and there's a free distributorship in it for anyone who
> manages to sell me anything or better yet sign me up. 

> I hate Amway.

> Thank you.
Lou
#include <std.disclaimer>
P.S. Do you really think HP would let me speak for them?