From: emarsh@hernes-sun.Eng.Sun.COM (Eric Marsh)
Newsgroups: alt.pagan
Subject: Re: long rambling question from a newbie
Date: 14 Sep 92 18:36:41 GMT
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Mt. View, Ca.
NNTP-Posting-Host: hernes-sun

In article <13SEP199212392431@venus.tamu.edu> a1z5868@venus.tamu.edu (Jay) writes:
>Howdy.  Got a few questions for y'all.  Note, I'm new to this list and
>paganism, and I'm not real sure about my direction at the moment...

>1)  (well, I thought I knew how I was going to start this out...)

>1)  I'm glad I got on here just when there was so much discussion
>about books for newbies to read.  I'll have to see if the Austin
>Public Library has any of them on its shelves.

>2)  Are there any pagan BBSs in Austin Texas?

Not sure, but I think that the Texas Pagan Alliance is located in
Austin. If you want, I might be able to get you more info.

>3)  In spite of having a deep romantic/poetic bent, I also tend to
>over-intellectualize everthing.  

Nothing wrong with that.

>This year, I have begun to explore
>many different religions but cannot in good faith choose one as
>a religion rather than merely a philosophy until I experience one
>of those famed "religious experiences".  

Who ever said you have to choose one?

>    This year, I have sung hymns at my first Catholic mass during Lent.
>I have danced in my first witch's circle during Ostarra.  I have an
>invitation to join the Quakers at one of their gatherings.  I have
>talked with Krishna's.  I have read of Buddhism and Taoism.  And I
>was raised Primitive Baptist.  (My father's a deacon.)  There are
>parts to each of these religions that I admire.  There are very small
>parts of most of them that make me say "YES!  THAT'S EXACTLY IT!"
>But no one body encompasses my deepest beliefs.

I am a Wiccan third degree initiate. I also attend Quaker meetings 
and find much of substance in Buddhism, Taoism, and yes, even in the
teaching of Jesus. I don't think that I can say "YES!  THAT'S EXACTLY IT!"
to any of these. I think that to do so I would have to admit that one
of these religious philosophies is complete, with all the answers. 
Religious philosophies are created by people, and people do not have
all the answers. But you know, thats really not such a bad thing.
Because nobody has all the answers for us, it forces us to go looking
for those answers ourselves.

>    I'm hoping to find such a symbol of my thoughts.  If I absolutely
>had to choose a description of myself, it'd be something along the lines
>of "buddhist pagan solipsist".  Completely incongruous, I know, but so
>is my nickname of "The Mellow Tigger" and my habit of romantic 
>intellectualizing.  *shrug*  I believe without suitable evidence in
>a purposeful creation, though I don't necessarily believe in a creator.

Sounds like you are on the right path, the path of the seeker. Bear in
mind that the path itself is the message, not the destination.

>    I'm not real sure how paganism can help me find what I want (since
>I'm not sure even what it is that I want.)

Perhaps you should see what paganism has to offer, and then decide
if you can use any of it in your quest.

>    I would like to see myself as someone who practices "green"
>medicine/magic, who accepts both "good" and "evil" traits in people
>(who seem to be naturally a mixture of the two), who encourages
>compassion in spite of this understanding of duality, who aids
>people in their personal/religious/educational/political pursuits
>where they would lead to wholeness/self-fulfillment even if I don't
>share the need to follow those same pursuits, who can perform minor
>miracles to shock people out of believing that the ordinary is mundane
>rather than a miracle in itself, who isn't particularly concerned
>about life/afterlife/whatever because being is enough and I'm content
>with that, who encourages love even when I'm not particularly sure
>what love means, and even more stuff that I don't yet know how to 
>verbalize.

yes

>    So...  is there a deity who encompasses the essence of "Mother
>Nature", combined with "The Most Secret Knowledge" of the Bhagavad-Gita,
>mixed with the selflessness of Buddha, laced with the compassion and
>miracles of Jesus, and garnished with a touch of a peculiar strain
>of solipsism?  All in a form that understands the value and usefulness
>of my homosexuality in the needs of our growing culture?

As a panthiest, I think that ultimatly all is God. Therefore, God
is all that you have named, and much more. As for the form, I'm afraid
that you will have to put together the pieces you need, yourself.

>- The Mellow Tigger

Eric
Newsgroups: alt.pagan