From: anderson@macc.wisc.edu (Jess Anderson)
Subject: Re: Random Straight Bashing Post
Organization: Madison Academic Computing Center, UW-Madison
Date: Sun, 24 Jan 93 11:51:38 GMT


In article <1993Jan23.033719.15475@Princeton.EDU>
elliott@phoenix.Princeton.EDU (Jr.  Frank W.  Elliott)
writes:

>A previous post discussed a fantasy of "random straight
>bashing." This was despicable.  More than a few lgb people
>on this group have straight best friends, and almost all
>have straight family members.  Moreover, whether or not you
>like a group of people, the thought that this group might be
>treated in an arbitrary manner should repel and outrage you.

You're right, but:

We're born and raised in a violent society.  To that extent
it's natural to react to violence with violence.  It may
be a very bad idea, especially to make the mistake of carrying
out (any kind of) violence (against anyone).

I'm not so sure, however, that as a gedanken exercise it's
all that bad.  

The dominant message we get from straight society is "Don't
exist, you're no-OK" This, I'm sure most of us agree, is a
very damaging message, since most of us internalize it at an
age when we are completely unable to understand ourselves
and the world around us, and the luckier fraction of us who
manage eventually to escape this message by coming out (I'd
bet money this is a minority of LGB people) still carry
residues of that self-hate right to the grave.  It's even
harder for those who don't (or can't) come out where there's
a supportive, safe environment.  Most unfortunate of all is
the not infrequent instance of that message itself bringing
some of us, most often the youngest and least defended, to
an early grave, out of hopelessness and depression.

In light of that, it's not inappropriate that we react in
rage to such outrage.  A people systematically disempowered
by a massively unfair system arguably *needs* a way to
restore, at least innerly, a more proper balance to the
equations of life.

Fantasies of violence are such a commonplace correlative of
rage that to admonish people simple to suppress them strikes
me as unresponsive to the emotional needs underlying such
fantasies.

Rather, I believe that we help people more by making it safe
for them to come out about their inmost thoughts, including
their fantasy lives, so that together we can understand them
and ourselves in a more realistic light and work
collectively and individually toward constructive activities
leading to resolution of inner turmoil on a social and
personal level.  While in the case of violence, the basic
idea would be to channel the fantasy activity into actions
that do not injure or maim people, in other cases, this kind
of support can diminish or banish guilt, inappropriate
self-recrimination, and self-destructive patterns.  Finally,
it also helps foster support for patterns that injure no one
but that relate to minorities within the minority.

Thus armed with a greater degree of inner poise, we are more
likely to make common cause within our cohort, as well as
with straight family and friends who prove supportive, in an
effort to create a saner world, specifically one that
neither discounts the value of its diversities nor visits
mayhem upon the members of its minorities.

-- 
[Jess Anderson <> Madison Academic Computing Center <> University of Wisconsin]
[Internet: anderson@macc.wisc.edu <-best, UUCP:{}!uwvax!macc.wisc.edu!anderson]
[Room 3130 <> 1210 West Dayton Street / Madison WI 53706 <> Phone 608/262-5888]
[---------> Discrimination, Bigotry, and Hate are not Family Values <---------]
Newsgroups: soc.motss