From: swb@ccwf.cc.utexas.edu (Steve Buffum)
Newsgroups: alt.flame
Subject: Beckett's Lost Work
Keywords: Samuel Beckett, K e n, parody
Date: 12 Nov 92 20:19:08 GMT
Reply-To: swb@ccwf.cc.utexas.edu (Steve Buffum)
Organization: Just Some Guy
Originator: swb@mickey.cc.utexas.edu


	"Waiting for Godot."  "Endgame."  "How It Is."  Timeworn classics
such as these have forever enshrined absurdist Irish playwright and author
Samuel Beckett in the annals of literary history.  In an only-recently-
discovered unfinished work, Beckett shows himself once again as a keen
observer of the human condition, commenting simultaneously on the absurdity
of human existence as well as the innate fear and distrust he had of the
so-called "Technological Golden Age" of the latter half of the 20th century.

	This unfinished and most ambitious of his works, "Deux Ex Machina,"
was recently discovered by Beckett scholars in his adopted country of
France.  The title, using the French word for "two" in place of the Greek
word for "God" stems from his use of two main characters in the role of
being "in the machine."  In the five-act play, Beckett uses his trademark
absurd dialogue to tell the story of two individuals, who, overcome by the
pressures of the technologically-changing world around them, embrace a warped
form of cold, emotionless, "logical" thinking to distance themselves from
an increasingly-putrid state of Man.

	The original work refered to the lead characters simply as X and Y,
but for reasons of clarity and in an effort to make the text more applicable
to today's America, we have replaced them with the common names "Ken" and
"Bruce."  Printed below, therefore, are some short excerpts from the play,
as well as some notes that will increase the reader's appreciation for this
fine work of an underrated and oft-misunderstood genius.

"Deux Ex Machina," A Play in Five Acts

Act III, Scene 4

Ken:	Who's there?
Frieda: It's Frieda from Accounting.
Ken:	Accounting is irrelevant, as it serves no useful purpose.

(Author's note: The notion of "irrelevance" plays a central role in developing
 Ken's dealings with the outside world.  By deeming things "irrelevant", Ken
 is able to disassociate himself from the stressful world around him.)

Frieda: No useful purpose?  How do you think you get paid?
Ken:	Payment is irrelevant, as Ken is self-sufficient.  Perhaps you should
	inform yourself as to the state of Ken before attempting to
	initiate substantive communications with Ken.
Frieda: I wanted to check on that expense report from Hastings.
Ken:	You are indeed misinformed, as Ken requires no expenses because Ken
	is self-sufficient.  Perhaps your auditory synapses are firing
	improperly.  Ken will attempt to repair the damage:
	(cups hands around mouth)
	OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE
	OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE
	OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE

(Author's note: There is no explanation for these phrases which Beckett has
 littered throughout his text.  Many conjectures have come and gone, but
 perhaps the most compelling is that Beckett was actually a nitrous oxide
 addict.)

Frieda: Wah! (runs from office)
(long pause)
Ken:	(speaking to potted plant on desk) The Company has indeed fallen into
	a state of disarray.  Is no one informed here?
(long pause)
Ken:	One more piece of information logged into the database. (scribbles
	in notepad, then reads what he has written) "Plant unresponsive to
	simple English.  Woefully uninformed.  Will initiate French procedure
	tomorrow."

...

Act II, Scene 1

Ken:	Have you come for information?
Bruce:	No, you seem to be misinformed.  I am from the Department of Infor-
	mation, and am perfectly informed.

(Author's Note: This scene marks the introduction of Bruce as a kindred spirit.
 And yet it is Ken's inability to deal with outsiders that prevents the re-
 lationship from being anything more than a meeting of like-lack-of-minded
 individuals: there is no room in Ken's world for bonding.)

Ken:	Ken cannot be misinformed, for Ken is Ken, and Ken can only be Ken,
	thus Ken is Ken, and thus Ken is not misinformed.
Bruce:	I see that you too are informed then.
Ken:	Perhaps your auditory synapses are malfunctioning.  Ken suggests that
	you seek medical attention post haste.  In the meantime, you should
	note that since Ken is Ken, and only Ken, with a side order of Ken,
	Ken cannot be informed as well as being Ken, which Ken is.  Ken will
	attempt to dislodge any obstructions in your ear canal:
	(cups hands around mouth)
        OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE
        OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE
        OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE OGGLE
Bruce:	Thank you for that valuable information.  I have determined that
	other phrases are useful in informing the masses as well.  For example:
	(cups hands as did Ken)
	WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH
	WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH
	WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH
Ken:	That is most informative.  You are from the Department of Information?
Bruce:	Yes, indeed I am.
Ken:	How informative.
Bruce:	That's what we're here for.
Ken:	This too is informative.  Please pause as I enter this information into
	my database. (makes whirring sound)  Your presence has been logged into
	the database.  Please initiate leaving procedures immediately.
Bruce:	Yes, I will leave now.
(he does not leave)

...

Act IV, Scene 2

(enter Sims)
Sims:	Ken!  Frieda tells me you're sitting on that Hastings report!  What's
	the hold-up?
Ken:	As my direct supervisor, I can only lament the degree to which you
	seem to be misinformed.  This is most troublesome.
Sims:	Misinformed?
Ken:	Yes.  You seem to believe that Ken is responsible for the Hastings
	report, which is an example of the highest degree of misinformation.
	Ken is Ken, and only Ken, and is therefore Ken and not responsible
	for the Hastings report.  Hastings is irrelevant.  Reports are
	futile.  You are misinformed.  Mares eat oats and does eat oats and
	little lambs eat ivy.  A kid'll eat ivy too, but then, he is not
	informed as is Ken, and is thus irrelevant.  You may thank me for
	the information now and initiate exiting procedures immediately.
Sims:	(shouting) Where is the bloody Hastings report?!
Ken:	Ken sees no need to shout, for Ken is well within the range of hearing
	a spoken voice at a normal volume.  Ken suggests that the Company
	initiate comprehensive hearing tests for every employee except Ken,
	because there appears to Ken to be a serious proliferation of in-
	adequate hearing algorithms within the Company.  As a first step,
	Ken will attempt to repair your hearing with a simple procedure:
	(cups hands around mouth as before)
	KUMQUAT KUMQUAT KUMQUAT KUMQUAT KUMQUAT KUMQUAT KUMQUAT KUMQUAT
	KUMQUAT KUMQUAT KUMQUAT KUMQUAT KUMQUAT KUMQUAT KUMQUAT KUMQUAT
	KUMQUAT KUMQUAT KUMQUAT KUMQUAT KUMQUAT KUMQUAT KUMQUAT KUMQUAT
Sims:	Will you stop spounting gibberish?!  I need that damn report!
Ken:	(speaking to potted plant) New information for database: direct
	supervisor seems unable to process meaty chunks of information.
	Also seems unable to show gratitude for hearing reclamation pro-
	cedure.  Woeful state of affairs within Company. (long pause)
	Reminder to initiate German procedure for plant at next opportunity.
Sims:	Get me that report or you're fired!
Ken:	Again it seems impossible that you lack so much information, but Ken
	is a tireless provider of information, and will seek to inform you
	now.  Ken is Ken, and only Ken, for Ken can be Ken and only Ken with
	a Ken Kenny Kenny and a hey nonny ho.  Thus Ken is Ken and nothing
	other than Ken, and thus Ken is not fired.
Sims:	(screaming) Ken IS fired!  You're fired!  Get out!
Ken:	You are fortunate that Ken is such a tireless provider of information,
	as otherwise you would remain in extreme danger of remaining mis-
	informed for the reaminder of your remaining life.  Ken cannot be out,
	for Ken is Ken.  You have become quite apoplectic.  Please initiate
	washing and calming procedures at earliest possible convenience.

...

Act V, Scene 6

Bruce:	It is unbelieveable that people can remain so misinformed after we have
	provided them with so much useful information.
Ken:	Yes, Ken agrees.  But this cannot dissuade Ken from following informing
	procedures.
Bruce:	As well it should not.  The Department of Information is very impor-
	tant.
Ken:	And informative.
Bruce:	Yes, that too.
(long pause)
Bruce:	So what will we do?
Ken:	When?
Bruce:	When what?
Ken:	When will we do something?
Bruce:	Like what?
Ken:	When?
Bruce:	When what?
Ken:	You seem to have become repetitive.
Bruce:	And yet repetition is the key to providing good information.
Ken:	Just so.
(long pause)
Bruce:	Well?
Ken:	Well what?
Bruce:	What should we do now?
Ken:	Ken will continue to provide information for the misinformed.
Bruce:	I think it is important to do this creatively.
Ken:	Ken agrees with you, for you have a good point.  Creativity is the key
	to retaining Ken's link with humanity.
Bruce:	Creativity makes everything worthwhile.
Ken:	Without creativity, Ken cannot continue to function properly.
Bruce:	Creativity is crucial to the informing of the misinformed.
Ken:	Ken must exhibit creativity to be effective.
Bruce:	Yes, the Department of Information must exhibit creativity.
Ken:	Ken suggests the exhibition of creativity.
Bruce:	Yes, let's exhibit creativity.
(they do not exhibit creativity)

END

--
Steve Buffum           | "Does that name mean nothing to you?"
swb@ccwf.cc.utexas.edu |  -- Pozzo from "Waiting for Godot"