From: rji@trellis.cs.nott.ac.uk (Rob Ingram)
Subject: Re: A joke?
Organization: Communications Research Group
Date: Tue, 15 Sep 92 10:26:03 GMT

In article <1992Sep14.213851.25057@ugle.unit.no>, leifmk@Lise.Unit.NO (Leif Magnar Kj|nn|y) writes:
|> In article <1992Sep14.193125.24632@newshost.unh.edu>, ss1@kepler.unh.edu (The Rink) writes:
|>  > 
|>  > A person died without Christ and went to hell for eternity.
|>  > 
|>  > Oh, I'm sorry -- this is for humor.  But the devil is laughing his head off!
|>  > 
|>  > 
|>  > 
|>  > 
|>  > 
|>  > 
|>  > -- 
|>  > ----------------------------------------------------------------------
|>  > |                              The Rink                              |
|>  > ----------------------------------------------------------------------
|>  >  For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves:
|>  >    it is the gift of God:  Not of works, lest any man should boast.
|>  > ----------------------------------------------------------------------
|>  > |                          Ephesians  2:8-9                          |
|>  > ----------------------------------------------------------------------
|> 
|> HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW!!!!
|> 
|> How about this one:  A person was brought up in deep religious faith in Christ
|> and tried very hard each day not to commit any sins.  He was so hung up about sin
|> that he rarely was able to relax and enjoy life; and indeed, he became *nearly*
|> the paragon of virtue that he truly wished to be.  He took his religious fervor
|> further in search of ways to aid others to virtue.  He got on the school council,
|> and banned books he felt would jeopardize the morality of the children.  He wrote
|> very long letters to newspapers, and helped collect money to fund missionary
|> ventures abroad.  He lived a very austere and hard life, always in anticipation
|> of the rewards he'd get in heaven.  He worked very very hard at his job, knowing
|> that good people never shirk.  Often, he put in hours and hours of overtime for
|> no extra pay, just to do as good a job as he possibly could.
|> 
|> Finally, he grew old and died.  Before this, he'd fathered a new generation, and
|> become a grandfather.  He made very sure to put the fear of God into each and 
|> every one of his offspring, but good.  When he died, he was mourned by more than
|> a hundred close relatives.  But all of them new that he'd gone beyond the mortal
|> toil to a new and glorious life in Heaven.
|> 
|> The very religious man went to Heaven, of course.  When he got there, his reward
|> was to spend eternity doing just the same as he had done on Earth.  Because since
|> he had spent so much energy and time all through his life just to live in that
|> very, very austere and virtuous way, it logically followed that he must really
|> enjoy that kind of life.  So eternity, for this man, was to spend every day
|> working very hard overtime, for no pay, and to spend what time he didn't spend 
|> at work just helping to run all sorts of social clubs for all the other dead
|> souls.  
|> 
|> Now, nobody was laughing.  Not even the devil, for even he is sick unto death
|> of this kind of people.
|> 
|> Leif the .sigless
|> "Put not your trust in the princes of this world, for they shall surely
|>  screw you over."  --someone else.
|> "Put neither your trust in the lords of the next world, for they have already
|>  been screwing you over even since before your birth." --Myself.

How about this for an alternative ending:-
	The man dies and thats the end of him because there was actually
no Heaven or afterlife at all and he should have spent his life enjoying
himself.

			Rob.

Disclaimer:

	This is not necessarily what I believe, but it may be.
-- 
_______________________________________________________________________________
|                       | Rob Ingram                                          |
|  "Hang loose kid!"    | University of Nottingham                            |
|                       | Department of Computer Science                      |
|                       | Nottingham, UK.                                     |
|_______________________|_____________________________________________________|
|                       |      "Women: Can't live with 'em, can't get them    |
|  rji@cs.nott.ac.uk    |       to dress in skimpy leather Nazi outfits"      |
|_______________________|_____________________________________________________|
Newsgroups: rec.humor,alt.folklore.urban,rec.arts.sf.misc