From: drieux@com (drieux, just drieux)
Subject: Strangest in a Strange Land
Summary: The Trip So Far
Keywords: Snow,Ice,Cats,Hospitality
Organization: Castle WetWare Philosopher and Sniper
Date: Mon, 21 Dec 1992 21:57:27 GMT

I have driven due south for about 1200 miles.
My car made it without any problems.

I left Vicky a few days ago and spent the night 
with relatives on the mainland.

By about noon on the 16'th I fired up the Firebird and ventured south.
Rolling up to the Peace Arch, a few flakes were flying.
The sky was overcast and I pulled up to the Booth.

Mr. USKustomsInspektorDudeDroid axed moe dese t'ings:

Q: Occupacion?
A: Geologist.

Q: Plannin' on stayin' long?
A: For de 'olidaze.

Q: Where do ya work?
A: Undeployed.

Q: Where was your last job?
A: Montreal.

Q: How long since ya worked?
A: Since July.

Q: When will you start working?
A: When I find suitable deployment.

Q: Will you be lookin' fer work in the US?
A: Nope.

USKustomsIspekorDudeDroid: Pull over to yer left & talk to the *nice*
                           Folx inside, *sir*

So dey axed me fer de PermisDeConduire (no peectures on de QuebecLicense, BDW)!
Douanes: Arrrrrrrrgh! No. de passeport MB 519493 (CANADIEN) was screwtenized.

The pleasant & gentle people there posed more of the same
and did sum kinda securite' czech on yers truelly. 

I was let in officiellement.

Kruzin inta Seattle, Thot I'd look up de peeler bar that I blew`
skads ov green stuff in a few weeks ago.

Feefte' douleurs wuz de limite dis tyme.

Two clox later, de rode was myne.
Had a bit of de MISERE wit de miles from de Kilometres and 'it NEIGE 
aroundabouts OLYMPIA. Fun. None in Kanader,Eh? Am I goin' Nord or Sud????

'twas odd...then the front end of de bazou was slippin'
I had hit some NubianIce.

Only about 100 Miles of that Noise!!!
Decided to slow it down a little?

Reaching Portland, There was lightning, cars wiped out everywhere, but no ice!!!
Hoo Hah, Only rain! Good t'ing the wypers 'r' JUSTABLE!!!!

'urd 'bout snow thru de passes...West was best, on to the 101 and redwoods.
CurvyTwistyHillyRoads I enjoyed. The car behaved flawlessly.

Got 150 miles North of RiceARoniTown & couldn't see no more!!
Turdsday mornin' I left a message on Nina's phone and kept drivin!

Got lost and Konfyused trying to stay on the 101 in town and rolled down de bay!
Found me way to a pizza place in MTN VIEW, and later checked into a motel.

Called about all the phone #'s I had and waited for repLIES from all
those STYUPID answering mochines. LowPoint fer sher.

Hung aroung and got de car shined up by guys who never herd of 
KommunistPlacesLikeKanadaOrFurrinersFromElNorte!!!

Went to a WoikinKlassPub and got KomfortablyNumb.
Got to CatWoman's trailer and was greeted with sneezes and AntiMystahineKapsules.

The cats were friendly, saying *MERP* frequently. One was even flirtatious.
LowPoint: One had CANCER and had to be vetted on SatDayMorning.
SweetDreams, Chaplain...*SNIFF*

Saw the FamousFault named after me, and went to FOGGS to parte'...

We met Tyger and waited for the others. Started downing some GosserBrau 
(ExcellentAustrianBeer) and waited for Nina and everyone else...

Some locals that I never herd of showed up. It was fine...
drieux showed up later along with Ed Carp.

Sir Rohwer, Don Fereira, Aahz & Stef were conspicuously absent...
We had some fun anyway, too bad ya meesed it...

MicroBoinx on short notice, I was surprised that ANYONE found the place, and so on.

Here I sit at the CatHouseTerminal in the loft at CastleWetware.
To dispell some myths: Yes, this place indeed exists,
drieux is taking a shower in the next room and he DOES talk like he posts.
Diana has no problems, I wear a felt hat, and Andy R. DOES exist.
BTW, he is a most excellent host, a tremendous chef, AND has the most eempresseeve
collection of VINO that I have EVER seen, IMVHO, uv curse </.Q
                                                              !
                           ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm going to have to bone up on me chopstix skills tanite. Gettin' together with
some dear friends that I met on the net in a VietnaMerican restaurant.

What should I wear besides my hat? I'll surely t'ink of something... </.)

Merci au Bon drieux for making this all possible...

Cheers,

dreas
u

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