From: donna@vogon.att.com (Donna J. Dixon)
Subject: Re: Parents Adjusting and Coping with Crying
Organization: AT&T
Distribution: usa
Date: Tue, 28 Jul 1992 04:13:12 GMT

From article <1992Jul27.000301.18615@cgrg.ohio-state.edu>, by ashley@osc.edu (Ashley Burns):
> We're first-time parents and adjusting has been really hard. We're 
> both feeling really anxious and problems with night-time crying are 
> not helping. I love the little guy, wouldn't trade him for the world,
> and know this is probably something many parents go through, but it is 
> really taking its toll. My mom and dad left this morning and I'm 
> worried about spending a sleepless night (that's how it is going around
> here) without them. For the last two nights I have only used them from 
> 6-10 a.m. so we could get some sleep, but now we're on our own. Greg 
> (daddy) goes back to work tomorrow so he will not be as able to stay up 
> and I'm discouraged.
  
  May-be your son is colicky.  If so, here are some things we tried
  with our daughter.  We switched her to a special formula, "Nutramigen"
  which is for babies that have a lactose intolerance (may account for
  all the crying).  It is more expensive, but after 3 months, we were
  able to put her back on regular formula.  It appears that once the
  colic fades away,  the lactose intolerance does also in most cases.
  We also gave my daughter mylicon drops before each bottle to help
  her release gas.  It did help.   She started at .3 ml at each bottle
  and was up to .6 ml.  by 2 months before each bottle.  



  They say that colic lasts about 3 months.  It our case we saw some
  improvement after 6 weeks once we started her on cereal 3 times a day.
  The doctor said there was a theory that once you fill up there 
  intestines with bulk, they calm down.  For our daughter, she began
  sleeping better at night (before she couldn't sleep even between
  feedings  without  whimpering or crying out in distress).  By eight
  weeks, the doctor put her on green vegetables at lunch along with
  her lunch cereal and yellow vegetables at night along with her
  cereal.  That was when I really began to see a difference.  Although
  it was hard to feed her baby food, she preferred her bottle, we
  stuck with it and she did start sleeping better at night.  It was
  easier to handle her crying all day long rather than at night.
  By ten weeks she began sleeping thru the night which I would never
  had believed since she couldn't sleep more than 2 hours at a time
  beforehand.

  The doctor did say there was an antigas medication we could put her
  on that had phenobarbitol in it which calms the baby down.  There is
  controversy in the medical field about drugging a baby though,  I
  did talk with a couple of women who had used the drug, and they said
  it was a lifesaver and they didn't see any harm in their babies by
  using it.  We held out and didn't use it, but there were days when
  I was in tears due to her constant crying.  

  My best advice is to not let yourself believe that this is what it is
  going to be like for long.  My daughter became the  love of my life
  after 3 months and the colic subsided.  She just turned 5 months and
  she is the most content baby I know.  I  think I feared that her
  personality was going to be like it was during the first 3 months
  whereas she is totally the opposite now.  All I can think of now it
  wasn't that bad, although at the time it is a living hell especially
  when you start having sleep deprivation.

  If friends offer to help, let them!  With my first  child, I had my
  mom help for one night.  With my colicky daughter, I gave in and let
  people help who offered because I thought I was going to go crazy.
  One friend stayed overnight and took care of the baby one night a
  week for 3 weeks, and that helped knowing relief was coming once
  a week.  Other people brought food, helped with household chores,
  etc.

  I also went on an antidepressant drug after 6 weeks of this crying and
  that helped a lot.  It didn't have any side effects.  I was fearful
  that it would make me drowsy during the day or dopey, but it was
  like taking a vitamin.  I did take it at night, and it did help me
  to get better rest by taking the edge away from all my anxieties
  about facing the next day with such an unhappy baby.  If you think
  you need something like that with all the changes your body and your
  mind are going thru  contact your doctor.   I no longer take anything.
  Once the colic was gone,  my depression was gone.  

  Hang in there.  It will get better soon.



-- 
--
Donna J. Dixon
Naperville, Illinois
{ ...!att!vogon!donna, donna@vogon.att.com }