From: tstil@Auspex.COM (Tim Stilwell)
Newsgroups: soc.culture.thai
Subject: American Boy marries Thai Girl
Date: 4 Jan 93 05:24:05 GMT
Organization: Auspex Systems, Santa Clara


    Sawasdee Khrup Tuk Kon.

 Next week, I will be traveling to Thailand to marry my sweetheart of two
 years.  If you can find the time, I would appreciate any offerings of
 good luck!  :-)   I am very superstitious.  I have my good luck string
 already.  And I received the New Year's blessing.  And I asked her to
 think it over twice before agreeing not to wait any longer.  BUT, I am
 still very nervous.  Excited too, but also nervous.  What if she changes
 her mind...

 I know that it is NOT necessary, but I would like to mention why I am
 marrying her.  After all, most s.c.t readers are my friends and this IS
 a Thai topic.  BTW, her name is Sudarat, but her nickname is Mi+ (bear)
 and she always refers to herself as LukMi+ (baby bear) when writing or
 talking to me.  For some unknown reason (at least to me), most Thai
 people find this incredibly amusing!  I like the name because I always 
 think of her as my teddybear.  I always wanted to hug her ever since I
 first saw her.  :-)

 		Reasons Why This American Will Marry This Thai

	1. This Thai girl loves me.
	   I know this because of many things...
           The way she treats me, the way she talks to me,
           the way we talk about the future.
           Most of all I know it is true because of the
           look in her eyes!  :-)
           (Her little sister always hangs around whenever
            we are just sitting and staring at each other.
            Her little sister always says the equivalent of 
            "What's your problem? in Thai.)
	
	2. I love this Thai girl.
           She is pretty.  She is smart.  She is talented.
           Most of all, she is nice to me and everyone else.
           (In America, we sometimes refer to "Generosity"
            as the 8th deadly sin.  At last, I have found
            someone who doesn't complain if I am generous.)

	3. This Thai girl takes good care of her family.
           I have met most of her relatives and family
           friends (half the population of Ampore Phon Phisai).
           She always visits them and she is there to help if
           someone is sick.  I know because her letters are
           late!  :-(  But, she tells me what has happened 
           and apologizes more gracefully than I ever can.

	4. Her family likes me.
           Yes, they all do.  Well, maybe all.  I am still not
           sure about her older sister.  The one who yelled at
           me for a whole hour (I thought my ears would fall off)
           because I asked if I could sleep over.  Boy was I
           glad I did not understand most of what she said.  :-)

	5. This Thai girl is willing to learn about America.
           She already likes some rock'n'roll music, pizza and
           ice-cream.  But she is skeptical.  Hamburgers really
           aren't that great and American movies just are not as
           good as Thai.  Anyway, this is the part about her that
           I like best.  She is not willing to sell her soul to
           live in America.  As she said, "Why don't you live
           here?"  Gosh!  Thai food EVERYDAY!  Oh my poor stomach! :-)
           
	6. This Thai girl is willing to teach me about Thailand.
           She is incredibly patient.  She is polite.  Her favorite
           words are "Mai Dai".  :-)  Anyway, she is willing to overlook
           the facts that I have white skin, a big nose, a general lack
           of understanding of basic Thai customs, and I mispronounce
           every other word.  She says I am trainable.  Barely.

	7. This Thai girl is NOT interested in American citizenship.
           This is a big relief.  If we stay married, she has the
           opportunity to become a U.S. citizen and transport her entire
           family to America.  But, she is not interested and neither
           are they (her family).  Contrast that with the average Asian
           in America desperately searching for someone to marry his/her
           sister, mother, niece, cousin, whatever.  Always quick to 
           say "Well, she sounds OK, but you just can't trust Thai
           people.  But don't worry.  Let me show you a picture of my
           relative that would be much better for you."  :-(
         
	8. This Thai girl is NOT a snob!
           She is very beautiful.  Wherever we go, Thai boys turn to
           look at her as she walks by.  (And she's wearing pants?)  If 
           we were in America, we would be holding hands and I might 
           think they are looking at me.  But we are in Thailand, and 
           I am always walking in front (I am the man) unless as usual, 
           I don't know where I am going and she is strolling like 
           "time is money" so I have to run to keep up.  Anyway, she 
           is never ever rude to anyone.  And she doesn't write and ask 
           for money or expensive gifts.  Basically, she is affordable.  :-)

	9. This Thai girl is NOT a robot!
           She is able to think and act on her own.  We even date
           without a chaperone!  Anyway, it is obvious that she is
           not simply obeying the evil plot of an older relative that
           desires all my money or a chance to live in America.  

	10. This Thai girl is skilled labor.
            Well, semi-skilled.  OK.  Some might say unskilled.  But
            she can clean house very well.  She is the best cook of
            any girl I have ever met (Sorry Moddie).  Also, she likes
            children and takes care of them and her family very well.
            I have heard that she cleans clothes very well too, but
            I don't know that yet.  She still says "Wash your own.
            We aren't married yet."  :-(   When I think about how
            she persuades me to do my own laundry and always give 
            her money, I am afraid to let her work.  She has management
            potential for sure!  :-( 	

	11. This Thai girl is still a virgin.
            No fears about a part-time job as a prostitute.  Also,
            she has saved herself for me.  I know how she feels about
            herself and I know how she feels about me.  I am honoured!
	    But, this also means I have to teach her everything.
            Boy am I glad that I took that Health class in college.  :-)

 This girl and this boy can do the unthinkable.  Learn from each other and
 teach each other and their children to live comfortably in both worlds
 (America and Thailand).  Why?  Because while it is true that each person
 believes that there is only one good way to do anything (Thai way or
 American way?), each is willing to observe a different way.  She shows
 him a new way or he shows her a new way.  After observing these new ways,
 nothing changes!  :-)  But, the first step has been taken.  Each is
 willing to accept the idea that although there really is only one good
 way to do anything, other ways are allowed.  Imagine how many wars would
 not exist if other people were this tolerant!

 Khawp Khun Hai^ Gumlung Fung+ 

 tim