From: poo@athena.mit.edu (Claude Poux)
Newsgroups: misc.fitness
Subject: Bodybuilding Hilarity III: The 1992 Mr./Ms. America Competition
Date: 30 Sep 92 14:34:24 GMT
Article-I.D.: athena.1992Sep30.143424.4621
Distribution: misc.fitness
Organization: Massachusetts Institute of Technology

howdy, y'all.

the 53rd annual aau mr./ms. america competition was held in the pavilion
theatre of the garden state ractrack in cherry hill, new jersey on 9/25 &
26.  the theatre is a truly beautiful facility.  it's too bad that, given
the prestige of the event, and with large bodybuilding populations in
philly, nyc and throughout joisey, the event itself was a disaster.  :(

50% of the seats were unfilled.  the sound system was abominable.
speakers blew, overwhelming buzzing sounds abounded, and many of the
contestants' choices of music, as well as the posing routines themselves,
seemed to have been choreographed by their worst enemies.  many in the
audience, including yours truly, were
befuddled by the seeming random motions to cackling music in many of the posing
performances.  the printed program was likely written by a 7th grader with
little training in the english language, much less logical thinking.

there was only one vendor in the lobby area -- california bodywear -- and
the merchandise was overpriced big-time!!!  few purchases took place, as
far as i and my friends could tell.

there were no guest posers.

the master of ceremonies was morbidly obese --- forgive me, but many that i
overheard and talked to about the show found little amusement in that
irony.  further, the mc had little to say of interest.  several DOZEN
times, however, he screamed into the microphone: "put your hands together
and help make this the top bodybuilding competition of all time!"  few
heeded his advice.

we bought $20 seats and sat in the $75 section because no one was there!

the masters', teens', and couples' competitions were separated from the mens'
and womens' competition.  one was forced to buy 2 tix to see the entire
show.  folks were not too pleased with this.

contestants were judged by height class, not weight.  unfortunately,
"bodybuilding schizophrenia" was blatantly manifest in this competition.
you see, the aau imposes rigorous (?) drug testing in its regional
competitions, but has no testing for its famous national competition.
consequently, the contestants were a clear admixture of extraordinary
natural athletes and advanced roid chewers.  sadly, some of the roid
chewers brought to mind a frankensteinian metaphor - that what one wills into
being via science will be.  i'm thinking of one gentleman, 5'4", who came
in at 225 pounds, hard!!  someone from the santoriello contingent (more on
that later) blurted out "boulder man!!"  i had to agree.  the craters on
his face were lunar-like, and his muscular system was unwieldy at best, and
clearly out of control.  no form to speak of here, just massive slabs of
muscle bulging out in all directions -- almost as if they had been slapped
onto his body by well wishers.  GROSS.  easily the "biggest" guy there, he
didn't do very well.  there were a few people like this.

at the other extreme, there was a 6', 200 lbs guy with perfect symmetry
and form, and a brilliant posing routine.  he placed 3rd in the tall
class.

having disparaged the show, i must say that the women were a breath of
fresh air next to the mens' competition!  once again, someone from my gym
took 1st place (in the masters' women division) -- my trainer, larna maga.
she was simply splendid.  having watched her hone in on her target for 7
months, and then hit the bull's-eye in her own very dignified fashion,
brought tears to these eyes.

another massachusetts woman, kathi costello, took the ms. america.  she was a
wonderfully gracious and classy contenstant.  at 5'4", 135 hard pounds,
she was in fine form.  then there was a woman who came in at 4'10, 170
pounds of granite!  she didn't do so well.  she and boulder man would make
quite the couple, though....     go figure......  

the mens' winner (i think his name is tony graziano) was 5'10", 225 pounds
of well sculpted physique.  he's trained for 10 years.

of note, a relative of the notorious franco santoriello competed (charles
s.), and franco was there.  he was besieged by autograph seekers.

in sum, i can only guess that the promoter, joe tete, is out of a job.  

sorry folks, but i'm calling it as i and my friends saw it.....:(

poobear