From: clare@nynexst.com (Clare Chu Ayala)
Newsgroups: soc.culture.asian.american
Subject: Re: Oriental bias against Indians ? How true ?
Date: 16 Apr 92 18:19:06 GMT
Distribution: na
Organization: Nynex Science and Technology

In article <1992Apr15.231628.11852@oakhill.sps.mot.com> jpak@oakhill.sps.mot.com (James Pak) writes:
>
>Well, Clare, let me give you some advice.  Not *all* people are out to flame
>you.  Why dwell on this "flaming" issue?  It's self-defeating.  There are
>plenty of "nice" posters in the sea, etc etc.  See what I mean?  How many
>people did it take to flame you before you started trotting out the frowny
>face?  Just one!  See how a few negatives (flame) can drown out many positives
>(other posters who like what you write)?  Not that easy to ignore the negative
>reaction all the time, right?  Same here, but for different reasons.
>
>Jim
>-- 
>(Do not listen to the address on the header.  My correct email address is: )
>jpak@manute.sps.mot.com  or  ...!cs.utexas.edu!oakhill!manute!jpak


  I did not say that *all* people are out to flame.  I only said
  that this is the *only* newsgroup that I got flamed in, and only
  a few times.

  As for the frowning face, it has to do with having to kill all
  the Dwight Joe articles, and the gadzillions of flames to get to
  any social topics.  This is under the (soc.) category, not
  the bash someone's culture category.  

  I still get lots of friendly help from nice posters all over the
  world.  Just bought a game over the net and it arrived today.
  People are helping me decide on a hard drive.  Others are sending
  me p.d. clip art they got off the Mac.  So I'm not concentrating
  on any "flames", just noticing that it is ONLY in this group,
  that seems so unfriendly to Asian females.  You guys are always
  categorizing us as "stuck up", "traitors", "only want CM", "look down on
  AM", etc. etc.  And then when we say anything, you pick apart
  anything that is posted that goes against your preconceived
  notion of the world.  You don't treat us in a friendly manner,
  how can you expect us to go out with you?  And when I say that
  I've experienced this and that, you say it's not valid because
  it contradicts your perceptions, or the 90% of the cases (whereever
  that statistic comes from).  I'll just state that in my personal
  observation I don't see AM getting less dates than anyone else.
  I know many CMs who are always complaining about not getting
  any dates and asking for advice.  The only thing I see in common
  is low self-esteem, not racism, sexism, or physical traits.
  I have a CM friend who is constantly ticking off his good traits
  vs. his bad traits, trying to convince himself that this makes
  up for that, etc.  I always tell him not to worry about it, because
  if someone likes him, they'll go for the whole package.  But if
  he keeps sitting there dwelling on all the reasons why no one
  will go for him, then he'll never get a date.  To my knowledge
  he hasn't gotten one yet.  I know many CMs with similar stories
  (I won't bore you with all their excuses, ranging from baldness,
  to being unathletic, flabby, having depression, etc.)  So I'm
  saying they don't have an advantage except perceived by you guys.
  Well maybe the only advantage is that they are friendlier to
  me, never been flamed or anything.  :-)  
-- 
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Clare Chu, Ph.D.             Data & Information Services
NYNEX Science & Technology   clare@nynexst.com
White Plains, NY 10462       AMIGA RULES!!!