HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: erc@pogo.Corp.Sun.COM (Ed Carp)
Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.singles,soc.couples
Subject: Re: Sanctity of relationships
Date: 8 Apr 92 20:21:23 GMT
Distribution: world,soc
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Mt. View, Ca.
NNTP-Posting-Host: pogo.corp.sun.com

In article <1992Apr8.032542.3234@bradley.bradley.edu> dave@bradley.bradley.edu (David Vessell) writes:

>friends, then I probably would not take an active role, but simply offer
>myself as an alternative once the relationship has weakened adequately.  If

Sounds rather unethical to me.  Any don;t tell me that you wouldn't take ANY
sort of role in hastening this along...

You're treading on dangerous ground here, David.

>But on the whole, I live by the maxim "All's fair in love and war."

It's not a maxim, or a truism.  I'm not going to get into a fight over situational ethics
or ethical relativism, but it seems to me that you aren't making the loving choice - either for you,
or for her.  You're trading long-term happiness for short-term relationship.
--
Ed Carp                                      415/336-0797 (work)

++ UNIX  SysAdmin, Systems  Programming  Services,  Utilities ++
++ and Programmer Productivity Tools                          ++
From: davidson@pooh.cs.unc.edu (Drew Davidson)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: It's Whine Time Again...
Date: 6 Apr 92 03:43:39 GMT
Article-I.D.: borg.11044
Organization: University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill

The Traveller writes:
>	Wahhhhhhh...IjustfellinlovewithagirlwhoIhavenochancewithbecause
>	I'manerdandnoonelikesnerdsbecausetherealljealousandtooimmature
>	toknowanythingandallthejerksgetallthegirlsbecausetheythinkfun
>	ismoreimportantthanthosewonderfulwarmniceguycharacteristicsI'm
>	justburstingwith.Itsgonnastaythiswayforevertoobecausepeoplenever
>	growuplikemeandI'mgonnabealoneuntilthedayIdieallaloneandbitter.

What a bummer of a time to have your space bar stop working, huh?  %-)
-- 
Drew Davidson        \\     HELP FULLY INFORM JURORS!  TELL YOUR FRIENDS:
davidson@cs.unc.edu   \\    As a juror, you have the right to vote NOT GUILTY
 ** LEGALIZE TRUTH **  \\   if you believe the law broken is unjust or wrongly
* FULLY INFORM JURORS * \\  applied, regardless of the facts of the case.
From: ronan@codon3 (Karen Ronan;161 GPBB;x2-0884)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: love songs
Date: 15 Apr 92 14:32:15 GMT
Article-I.D.: agate.shepfINNomk
Organization: University of California
NNTP-Posting-Host: codon3.berkeley.edu

Haywire writes:
>Why is it when your trying to heal a broken heart by listening to the radio
>all you hear on the radio is love songs...???????!!!!!!!!!
>Its really annoying....

Because love songs sell products

ronan@codon2.berkeley.edu

"Red lotus incense fades on
The jewelled curtain."
From: tjg01@thdhub.UUCP (Terry Gardner)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Candy Francine Glore
Date: 16 Apr 92 19:25:04 GMT
Organization: The Home Depot, Inc.


	Recently, I've established one of the most piquant and 
	titillating relationships I've ever had. All due
	to USENET!!! We plan to meet in San Francisco in May!!!
	They are scraping me off the celing at work, I'm floating
	so much!!!!!
-- 
Terry Gardner, terry@thdhub, terry%thdhub@uunet
Senior Network Systems Programmer @ The Home Depot, Inc.
404-433-8211 x 5124 Message Generated with GNU Emacs 18.58...
Aborting, Retrying, Failing, and Ignoring.....
From: gobbel@cogsci.ucsd.edu (Randy Gobbel)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: More on Swedish courtship customs
Date: 9 Apr 92 03:41:54 GMT
Reply-To: gobbel@cogsci.ucsd.edu
Organization: Cognitive Science Department, UC San Diego

Since I posted my previous message, I've learned a lot more about
Swedish customs.  Here's a charming one that I've just encountered:

First, the woman sends the man a note saying "I'm already involved with
someone else".  Then, when the man tells her that he's very unhappy
about that, but will survive, the woman sends him a note saying "I had
hoped I was the only one who felt this way," and proposes that they
continue seeing each other.  To top it off, she tells him that she's
been thinking about him constantly to the point that it's been
interfering with her relationship with her boyfriend, and that she's
never met anyone who affected her so strongly.

Only 1/2 :-) on the above, all of it actually happened to me in the past
few days.  She's made it crystal clear that she wants to keep seeing me,
but doesn't seem to want to break up with her boyfriend.  She's
apparently told him about the situation, and she said he was "calm" when
he told her.  I think both of us were kind of shocked at the intensity
of our own emotional reactions: we were standing there, both of us
saying "but I don't KNOW you!" in unison.  Everything's been completely
Platonic so far, if anyone's wondering about that.

So does anyone have any suggestions on how not to go nuts in this
situation?  Far from dampening my enthusiasm, my feelings for her are
now stronger than ever.  It might be mutual--hard to tell, but I'm
hearing from her more than before, and she's been initiating contact
with me much more as well.  I've told her that I'm not going to do
anything to try to break up her current relationship, although to tell
the truth I'd do just about anything that I thought would cause her to
decide to be with me rather than him.

-Randy

--
Internet: gobbel@ucsd.edu
----------------------------
Hi! I am a .signature virus. Copy me into your .signature to join in!
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: aatresa@lims02.lerc.nasa.gov (Teresa Kline)
Subject: Re: And Now for Something Apartly Similar...(kiss!)
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41    
Organization: Yeah, *right* !
Distribution: usa
Date: 17 Apr 1992 08:17 EST  

In article <1992Apr16.210631.5135@ac.dal.ca>, 06zonker@ac.dal.ca writes...
>8888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888
> 
> 
>  Well, Teresa... methinks tha Carp too eely...the gentleman doth dodge too
>much....time to fish friendlier waters???? I have this friend who likes
>women with brains....
> 

Hmmmmmm....in Canada, perhaps???  :)

>Icey

And at this point (knowing how cold it still is in Cleveland) I bet this is 
an apt name.

-- Teresa

		Life -- just for the FUN of it!!!!
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: garvey@skybridge.SCL.CWRU.Edu (Heather Garvey)
Subject: Re: Sanctity of relationships
X-Post-Machine: yukon.scl.cwru.edu
Organization: Smith Undergrad Lab, CWRU, Cleve. OH
Distribution: usa
Date: Tue, 7 Apr 92 18:35:34 GMT

sms@cbnewsf.cb.att.com (steven.m.stein) writes:
>rnjx@vax5.cit.cornell.edu writes:
>
>**(stuff deleted here and there)**
>
>>The question is this.  Is it ever morally and/or ethically O.K. to actively
>>try to woo one member of an existing relationship from that relationship so
>>that you may start one with her/him?  Under what circumstances?  How about
>>pursuing someone who's engaged?  Where do you all draw the line?  If it isn't
>>O.K., would you still do it anyway?
>>
>
>Whether enticing a participant in another relationship to persue one
>with you is moral or immoral, in my opinion, is strictly a matter
>of personal choice.  Of course, knowning the self righteous and
>opinionated attitudes displayed in this newsgroup by some (and the rest
>of society), I'm sure you are going to hear from many who think you 
>to be a low life slime if you did.  

	If you purposely went out of your way to disrupt two people's
relationship, I'd call you a slime. If you told the person "I am
very interested in you." or "I'd like to get to know you better." or
some similar way of clearly and firmly letting your feelings and
wished be known, well, I'd NEVER call anyone a slime for that. It's 
never a sin to *tell* someone how you feel. If that person decides to act
on it, then whatever happens, happens. :) But I think it would be really 
low to run around spreading lies or such to attempt to break up two 
people who truly care about each other.


>Whether they want this to interfere with their situation,
>that's their choice.  

	Very true. 

--
"Oh beloved ice cream bar, how I love to lick your creamy center!"| Heather
"I've been bad, Ren. You'll smack me!"  "You stoopid eeeediot!"   | "Moose"
"Remember, kids -- Only five more days to Yak-Shaving Day!"       | Garvey
"Squeak! Squeak! Squeak, I tell you!" "Happy, happy. Joy, joy"    | R&S in '92!
From: aatresa@lims02.lerc.nasa.gov (Teresa Kline)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Ed and Teresa  (Carp ????)
Date: 16 Apr 92 18:08:00 GMT
Article-I.D.: lims02.16APR199213085985
Organization: Yeah, *right* !
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41

In article <16APR199212463800@lims01.lerc.nasa.gov>, afdenis@lims01.lerc.nasa.gov (Stephen Dennison) writes...
>... *my* style too, but `Different Strokes' and all that.
> 

Now, now, Stephen.  Everyone here knows that you've been egging this on and 
cheering from the sidelines.  "*My* style", indeed!

>I'm not sure *I* have seen any `seriousness' between T and E yet, despite 
>*MY* best efforts ! :-(

And just *what* efforts might those be????  :)

>>So far, in the few months that I've been reading, there has been 
>>very little "romance" here.  A lot of cheating, stealing, and lying, 
> 
>... sounds like alt.politicians ...

True!

> 
>>but is that really what romance is?  
> 
>...in *most* cases, yup ! :-(
> 

I honestly don't believe that.  If it *is* true, we might as well chuck 
this group right out the window.

>Oooooh... you're gonna hear about this ! *This* is kinda like calling *me* 
>`Steve'... only she's *blond* so the repercussions are greater but harder 
>to understand. :-)

Goober!!  I will make quite sure that *you* understand the repercussions of 
*this* particular statement!!!  To borrow one of Ed's favorite phrases...
GRRRRRR!
> 
> 
>>That's all right, I'm about to be a curmudgeon, too.  My name is Teresa.  
> 
>See ! Didn't I tell you ! :-)
> 

Yeah, but you read ahead.  Cheater, cheater!!!  :)

>>Please don't shorten it.  
> 
>I made that request of God... didn't work for *me* either ! :-)
> 

Sounds like a personal problem to me!!  :)

>> 
>>Isn't that what romance is all about?  
> 
>Not for *me* yet, but hope springs eternal... :-)
> 

Well, since you're working so hard for me and Ed, maybe we'll start looking 
out for *your* best interests.  Besides, it's not like Ed and I have a done 
deal.  (I imagine Stephen is looking and feeling hunted right about now.)  
:)

>>If it's too much like work, why bother?
> 
>Well, if it *pays* good ... :-)
> 

It's *not* that kind of work!  :)

-- Teresa

		Life -- just for the FUN of it!!!!
Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.singles,soc.couples
From: jpalmer@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu (John D Palmer)
Subject: Re: Sanctity of relationships
Organization: The Ohio State University
Date: Thu, 16 Apr 1992 01:19:16 GMT

In article <1992Apr13.130921.1712@ait.com> eleanor@ait.com (Eleanor Evans) writes:
>Love is always a gift, never a right.  Solid, lasting promises do not
>ensure that love will always continue--it continues while it continues,
>and goes when it goes.  I can only hope that mine lasts as long as my
>parents' did.

      Hmmm.   I disagree because, and ONLY because, the  promises can make
the love that died become reborn in a different, sometimes better,
incarnation.
   
     As for 'love' as a 'right', I can only state that I was referring to the
verb form of love. . . when wedding vows are made, the promise is to 
love your partner. . . and I feel that this duty continues most especially
when you hate your partner.
 
      Which unfortunately means pretty damn little. . . not much more than
don't claw and bite.
 
                                            John


-- 
"Love is cool; I mean, like, really cool.  Like, the coolest thing in
the universe, where, like, people open up inside and show the world how
they feel, and they ain't afraid someone's gonna laugh because they, like,
love themselves already!"  --Personality 42, a generic 60's philosopher
From: grs01153@runt.appstate.edu
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: <None>
Date: 9 Apr 92 04:20:04 GMT
Organization: Appalachian State University

Ok, folks, here is the deal.  Half of everybody and their brother at Bradley
University, where my boyfriend (Hi Aaron) goes to school, seem to read this
group and think I am cheating on Aaron. I am not, I have not, I will not. he is
the love of my life and has made me happier than I ever dreamed I could be. I
hope everyone else will be this happy in their lifetime.

The reason I asked is that I have numerous friends, mostly male, on the net
with whom I converse and correspond quite frequently (once, twice a week),
mostly to gain new perspectives (I am a writer and new perspectives are my
livliehood...). -- 

The reason I am posting this is because I have the feeling that a lot of people
who care about Aaron think I am screwing him over, and that is not true, and I
don't think it is fair that he has to justify my actions to anyone..I have done
so here and if anyone has anything they would like to say about anything I do
in the future, talk to me and we'll settle it.

`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'  
`'Shannon Frady                                     |                         `'
`'GRS01153@appstate.edu                             |        touch me         `'
`'Appalachian State University                      |            turn me on   `'
`'Boone, NC                                         |       burn me down      `'
`'Doo woppa good times                              |                    -ms  `'
`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'
Organization: Penn State University
Date: Thursday, 9 Apr 1992 12:47:58 EDT
From: <RJD118@psuvm.psu.edu>
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Where did the romance go?
 <1992Apr9.130410.9523@acsu.buffalo.edu>

The earth is scorched by the fiery blast from the heavens....but one man
still stands, untouched by the flames....
Hey, there is still romance around here. I used to post romance stuff a few
months ago. Then sadly, I, too, became a whiner. Now, when I am out of that
swing (thanks to a very wonderful young lady who I spend all my free time with)
I  just don't have the time to post the soft, gentle, romantic stuff that
is fuel to my fire. Sorry, but between school and her, I got NO time. Not
that that is bad....but it keeps me out of the net for long periods of time.
I'll see what I can do about putting some ROMANCE back on here, though...:)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
I_________________________I         Redneck!    The Official Lumberjack
I\***********************/I                     and Woodgatherer of the
                                                          RFA
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Xref: sparky alt.romance:6722 soc.singles:10593 soc.couples:1937
From: bicker@cbnewsi.cb.att.com (The Resource, Poet-Magician of Quality)
Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.singles,soc.couples
Subject: Re: Sanctity of relationships
Date: 7 Apr 92 20:23:24 GMT
Reply-To: Brian.C.Kohn@att.com (The Resource, Poet-Magician of Quality)
Followup-To: alt.romance,soc.singles,soc.couples
Organization: The Internet

In article <1992Apr7.152814.27453@cbnewse.cb.att.com> hjanssen@cbnewse.cb.att.com (hank janssen) writes:
>From article <1992Apr7.131701.11791@cbnewsi.cb.att.com>, by bicker@cbnewsi.cb.att.com (The Resource, Poet-Magician of Quality):
>> Yes Yes Yes!  This is precisely what happened, and I'm glad you
>> mentioned it.  After realizing that "she" would forsake "him" for "me"
>> with no so much as a thought, I could not trust her.
>> Relationship: kaput! 
>So in this case what would be the problem, because also you  initiated
>it,  you  could  not be trusted either. It's pot blaming the pan it is
>black...... (Do as i say, not as i do............)

Hehe...I think the phrase is, "Isn't that just like the pot calling the
kettle 'black?'"  But, I do content that people should do as I *do*,
NOT as *did*.

>> (Of course I coudln't trust myself for a while either.  It took several
>> months of soul-searching and morality reinforcement for me to even
>> consider seeking a new RP.)
>At  least  you  seem  to have some sort on consience, more than can be
>said about most people.  :-)

...especially *her*!!!!!  She's never realized what she did wrong,
*even after she and her previous RP reconciled (briefly).*  Their
reconcilement lasted just a little while; he eventually realized that
she never felt bad about what she had done and dumped her.  He and I
are friends now.

-- 
Brian Charles Kohn             AT&T Bell Laboratories Quality Process Center
ISO Certified Lead Assessor    E-MAIL: att!hoqax!bicker  (bicker@hoqax.ATT.COM)
    'Hope, not fear, is the most positive advocate of action.' - S.R. Lawhead
                   Stamp Out "SO": "RP" = "Romantic Partner"
From: aatresa@lims01.lerc.nasa.gov (Teresa Kline)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Some things never die!
Date: 6 Apr 92 13:07:00 GMT
Article-I.D.: lims01.6APR199208073049
Organization: Yeah, *right* !
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41

In article <3APR199220561600@ariel.lerc.nasa.gov>, afdenis@ariel.lerc.nasa.gov (Syntax Error) writes...
>>But I've decided to have some fun.  
> 
>Now *there's* a switch !
> 

Unkind, Stephen!  I am usually *very* serious...NOT!  :)

>>Some *things* never die, but some *people* may!
>> 
>>That means *you*, Stephen !  :)
>> 
> 
>And I suppose your computer will fix *itself* if I do ? 
> 

Now, dahlin', I *am* a Southuhn lady.  My guess is that if I *really* tried,
I could have our entire computer services division over here lickety-split 
to help solve one of mah li'l ole problems!  :)  :)

>>And possibly you too, Ed !  :)
>> 
> 
>Well, Ed believes in reincarnation ... maybe he'll come back as a perch. :-)

Nah, trout...definitely trout.  Maybe a rainbow trout.  :)

>See, I *knew* I was going to pay eventually ... it was just a question of 
>*when*. Gawd, women are *sooooo* predictable.

You'll pay for *this* one, too, buddy!  :)

>>Ok, Ed...so I'm asking.  *NOW* what are you going to do?
>> 
> 
>OK, Ed, sounds like put-up or shut-up time ! :-)
> 

Yep, now let's see what the man will do.

-- Teresa

		Life -- just for the FUN of it!!!!
Xref: sparky alt.romance:6851 soc.couples:2008 soc.singles:10835
From: afdenis@lims01.lerc.nasa.gov (Stephen Dennison)
Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.couples,soc.singles
Subject: Re: lying to oneself (was Re: Sanctity of relationships)
Date: 9 Apr 92 22:11:00 GMT
Article-I.D.: lims01.9APR199217114190
Distribution: world,soc
Organization: Ancient Souls Inc.
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41

In article <1992Apr9.174548.10849@ux1.cso.uiuc.edu>, mcregor@s.psych.uiuc.edu (Meloney Cregor) writes...
>In article <1992Apr9.101644.5254@hemlock.cray.com> robd@cray.com (Robert Derrick) writes:
> 
>>I agree with you that people "lie to themselves all the time", but I
>>don't think they are very successful at believing it.  Though it
>>doesn't stop 'em from trying.
> 
>*snort*
>Son, do I have some people *You* need to meet.

*Guffaw*
Me too ! :-)

> 
>There are, indeed, people who can lie to themselves and everyone they meet
>and completely convince themselves they are honest and don't practice
>deception.

Amen... the *key* is to be *far* away from them when reality sets in.  It 
gets pretty ugly...

> 
> 
> 

-- Stephen 

(The only two valid e-mail addresses from now on are ...)
afdenis@lims01.lerc.nasa.gov,  afdenis@lims02.lerc.nasa.gov
.. boring .sig follows, press n to skip it.

	Never regret a *choice*.  Rather, save your regrets for the
	choices you *didn't* make.
Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.couples,soc.singles
From: garvey@skybridge.SCL.CWRU.Edu (Heather Garvey)
Subject: Re: lying to oneself (was Re: Sanctity of relationships)
X-Post-Machine: yukon.scl.cwru.edu
Organization: Smith Undergrad Lab, CWRU, Cleve. OH
Distribution: world,soc
Date: Sun, 12 Apr 92 18:10:05 GMT

In article <1992Apr12.155119.6327@mks.com> fredw@mks.com (Fred Walter) writes:
>
>Ok. Try this on for size (you seem to have ignored the alcoholics/etc.
>that others have mentioned in other posts) :
>
>	people with no or low self-esteem
>
>Have you never run into people that are really brilliant and competent but who
>are convinced that they are worthless stupid people ? They are lying to
>themselves about how stupid they are and believing it.

	Ooh, ooh, that's me, that's me!! :-)

	As I explained to my boyfriend, I have 'the self-esteem of a 
fruit bat'. I was Salutatorian in HS, got into a very selective university,
have a summer job in a lab at the Univ. of Chicago. I'm doing pretty
well. I'm even a genius. (Whee!) But I still think of myself deep-down
as fairly worthless. 
	I know my boyfriend loves me and he's not going to leave me,
but I find myself involuntarily fearing that he's going to get tired of
me suddenly and drop me like a hot potato. I can't see why he *wouldn't*
think other women were better looking/better tempered/slimmer/more interesting
/smarter/etc. 
	Why? I don't know. I was shy as a child; always felt on the outside
looking in. (Having a 12th grade-reading level in kindergarten and being
terminally shy can do that.) As far back as I can remember, I've always 
set impossibly high standards for myself (Amazingly, my parents never 
did the "Achieve or die" thing...). I've never lived up to my own standards.
That and being extremely sensitive to others' opinions of me has made
me pretty low self-esteemed. My past three boyfriends have done nothing
to help. (One ran off with my best friend, one treated me like a blow-up
doll and the other constantly compared me to his ex-girlfriend.)
	This current boyfriend has helped my self-esteem incredibly,
and even though my heart sometimes feels worthless, my head can now override
it and tell it to stop being so silly. :-) It's not easy. I have to chide
myself a lot for slipping into my old worthless feelings. And sometimes
I feel it's just talk. 
	But yes, one can lie to one's self quite easily. And no, you don't 
think you are lying to yourself. You think everyone *else* is only being 
nice and saying something just to make you feel better, rather than really 
meaning it.


--
"Oh beloved ice cream bar, how I love to lick your creamy center!"| Heather
"I've been bad, Ren. You'll smack me!"  "You stoopid eeeediot!"   | "Moose"
"Remember, kids -- Only five more days to Yak-Shaving Day!"       | Garvey
"Squeak! Squeak! Squeak, I tell you!" "Happy, happy. Joy, joy"    | R&S in '92!
From: stark@ug.cs.dal.ca (Fuse)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: *smile*
Date: 7 Apr 92 04:14:47 GMT
Distribution: dal
Organization: Math, Stats & CS, Dalhousie University, Halifax, NS, Canada

>       What love songs, poems, quotes, stories, faerie tales, etc.
>do you think best epitomize real love?  As in forever-love?

  The song "Wuthering Heights" by Kate Bush.



  That and "Your Song" by Elton John (The version live in Australia is best)

        You see, I've forgotten if they're green or they're blue.
        Anyways, the thing is, what I really mean,
         Is your's are the sweetest eyes I've ever seen.

-- 
                                     |\^/|
                                 ._|\|   |/|_.         ya' hoser!
       Proud to live in ------->  \ CANADA  /
                                  <_________>          stark@ug.cs.dal.ca
From: erc@pogo.Corp.Sun.COM (Ed Carp)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: How depressing
Date: 10 Apr 92 01:19:05 GMT
Distribution: usa
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Mt. View, Ca.
NNTP-Posting-Host: pogo.corp.sun.com

In article <1992Apr8.221307.16247@eddie.mit.edu> mars@eddie.mit.edu (Anita Hsiung) writes:

>a play and returning to the apartment, we have scrumptious strawberry
>pie!

And you're depressed?  after strawberry pie?  You must have not gotten it from
Baker's Square (rea: the best pie place in the entire universe!)

I went out last weekend and spent $10 on a whole strawberry pie.  Yummm....!!!
--
Ed Carp                                      415/336-0797 (work)

++ UNIX  SysAdmin, Systems  Programming  Services,  Utilities ++
++ and Programmer Productivity Tools                          ++
Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.couples,soc.singles