From: mussack@innerdoor.austin.ibm.com (Christopher Mussack)
Newsgroups: soc.religion.christian
Subject: Re: There is no god
Date: 22 Nov 92 22:52:41 GMT

I know that I exist, I directly experience it, I close
my eyes and I can feel it. I know that there is "other",
something that is not me, that I need my senses to perceive.
I don't think I created the other, (perhaps I am god deluding
myself for some reason), so I think there is some reason for
the other. Because this other seems to be so vast and complicated
I assume that the reason for the other is some primary,
self-important thing. I realize that the other is very contingent,
I can imagine many different others that don't exist but could.
I assume that the reason for the other is very great, greater
than I, so it must be conscious. If the reason were merely some
law, such as the law of gravity, it would not be greater than I.
This line of thought is very non-rigorous, but it is intuitive to me.

If you merely contemplate the realm of existence, why is there anything
instead of nothing, why is there life in addition to inanimate
objects, but most important, why is there a "me" that is experiencing
these things, if you only wonder about these things for a few minutes
every day, then you will hopefully understand why I think there is
a God. I have thought about it since before I can remember, I still
think about it. 

I don't want to be lonely. I want there to be more "me's" out there
that I can communicate with. I think there are because I can see
the uniqueness of different people. I hope these other people
can see it in me. When a baby is born, as it's coming out it
opens its eyes and looks around. When that baby is put in your arms
it looks right at you, you can see that same spark in its eyes that
you feel in your heart. You realize that love is the most important,
most pleasurable, most joyous experience of all the experiences
you can have. The universal reason is greater than I so it must 
also have this in its nature, it must have love, it must be love. 

But I don't always love. Sometimes I am mean, or bitter, or angry,
or selfish, or whatever. But part of love is forgiveness. I need
forgiveness for when I screw up, or I'll be lonely again. If the 
universal reason is love, then it must also have forgiveness in 
its nature.

I grew up believing this. I was taught by my parents, my brothers
and sisters, my friends, my teachers, my wife, my kids. I did not 
have to be convinced, it made perfect sense to me. That must be 
why it is so hard for me to convince someone else. The point of 
religion is to communicate to others this basic understanding. 
Just as there are many languages, there are many religions, but 
just as there is one reality there is one God.

There is no "Christian" God. There is God, He is described by 
Christians in a certain traditionally Christian way. Don't be
discouraged if the description that you hear is "wrong". Any
description is wrong, it is incorrect just because it is voiced. The 
description is correct only if it correlates on both sides of the
dialogue. If I meet someone and he talks my talk and describes
situations that I understand then I say he is telling the truth.
If I meet someone who talks a different language it doesn't mean
he is lying, I just don't understand him. If you really don't
believe in God as He has been described to you please don't give up.
Sure some people lie about God, some people pretend they understand
and throw around the correct buzzwords, but some people do understand,
they can speak from the heart without regard for "orthodoxy" because
they know the truth. How do you tell the difference? I don't know.
I know how I tell the difference, but it wouldn't work for you.

I've seen complaints on this newsgroup about too much doctrine,
but discussions such as these help me. It's hard to "talk" to
people when you can't look them in the eyes, but then again
it's nice to get out a whole idea without the pressure of
being interrupted, or interrupting someone else, or worrying
about how I look, to be able to go back and reread at my leisure. 
This may sound contradictory, but I think
I learn most from the people I don't agree with, from the
atheists challenging basic principles to discussions of finer 
points of Biblical interpretation. I don't think it's bickering. 

Chris Mussack