From: madhaus@netcom.com (Maddi Hausmann)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: It's Test Time for Bush Lovers
Date: 12 Oct 92 23:38:23 GMT
Organization: Society for Putting Things on Top of Other Things

This is really funny.  Wish I wrote it...

Article 9097 of alt.politics.bush:
From: terri@csd4.csd.uwm.edu (Theresa J Flynn)
Newsgroups: alt.politics.bush,alt.politics.clinton,talk.bizarre
Subject: No looking at your neighbors' papers....
Date: 3 Oct 1992 16:32:40 GMT
Organization: Computing Something Division
Distribution: world


PENCILS UP, YOU MAY BEGIN

Joel McNally, the Innocent Bystander -- The Milwaukee Journal 10/1/92

A midterm campaign examination on everything we have learned so far:

1. Which promise on taxes by George Bush do you find more persuasive?

   a.  His 1988 pledge:  "Read my lips.  No new taxes."
   b.  His new, improved 1992 pledge: "I am not going to do it again. Ever,
       ever."

2. Which action by a college student do you consider more important in
   determining how you will vote in 1992?
   
   a.  What Bill Clinton did to avoid getting drafted to fight in a war he
       opposed.
   b.  What Dan Quayle did to avoid getting drafted to fight in a war he
       supported.

3. In the Great Owl Debate of "jobs vs. environment" posed by the Bush
   campaign, which would you be more upset to wake up tomorrow morning and
   find was gone?

   a.  Your job.
   b.  Your planet.

4. Which of the following would you be willing to bet your next paycheck
   that the vice president of the United States could spell correctly?

   a.  Anti-disestablishmentarianism
   b.  Potato
   c.  Cat

5. What is your favorite family value?

   a.  The right to choose whether to have a family.
   b.  The right to enjoy "Murphy Brown."
   c.  The Grand Slam Special at Denny's

6. Which candidate has the most appeal among young voters?

   a.  Clinton, because he plays that hip musical instrument, the saxophone.
   b.  Bush, because he talks in rap.
   c.  Al Gore, because he looks like Superman.
   d.  Quale, because he looks like Jimmy Olsen.
   e.  Ross Perot, because he's an elf.

7. Bush says the election is about trust.  Which of the follwoing would you
   trust Bush to do if elected to a second term?

   a.  Never to raise taxes again. Ever.  Ever.
   b.  To select only the best-qualified Americans for important jobs such
       as the vice presidency and the US Supreme Court.
   c.  Not to throw up on heads of state while visiting other nations.

8. During the sale of US missiles to Iran, the late Ronald Reagan was
   napping through the presidency and Vice President Bush was "out of the
   loop."  Write down your best guess as to who was running the United
   States.

9. What is your primary concern about the US economy?

   a.  How to spend the big bonanza if Bush finally succeeds in cutting
       capital gains taxes.
   b.  Whether US jobs are on a fast track or a slow track to Mexico.
   c.  That there be one again.

10. What about Bush reminds you most of Harry Truman?

   a.  Nobody thinks he's going to win.
   b.  He likes to fish and recently rode on a train.
   c.  He's a dead man.


-- 
Maddi Hausmann                madhaus@netcom.com
Humorist, Satirist, Tech Writer.  Take your pick.

Centigram Communications Corp, San Jose California  408/428-3553
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle