HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Date: Thu, 21 Jan 1993 14:14:22 -0500 
From: Judi Mancuso <jm5p+@andrew.cmu.edu>
Subject: Re: meeting future step children

> 
>HELP!  Next week I will be meeting my boyfriend's daughters for the first
>time.  They are 13 and 8, and live with their mother.
> 
>I would GREATLY appreciate any ideas/thoughts/helpful hints on things to
>do or not do when I meet them.  I think the plan is to take them to McDonalds
>or something like that.
> 
>It's important to me that I have a good relationship with them, because
>their father and I will probably get married in the next year or so.
> 
>Thanks!
 
Ramona--
I am going to speak from experience--I was once a 13 year old meeting a
future step mom---WHOA!  All I can tell you is this--do not tell them
how great their father is, do not tell them "I do not want to replace
your mom", do not say "I want to be your friend" and do not tell them
that you are going to marry their father.  Going to McDonald's might not
be a great idea---you are setting yourself up--it requires conversation.
 How about something like a movie then out for ice cream or something
(you can discuss the movie!).  Just remember, these are young GIRLS and
this man is THEIR father--so a gradual introduction into their lives is
probably the best thing.  This is real tough.  When I look back, I can
pretty much tell you that the first impression of my step mom (20 some
years ago) has lasted a lifetime and even though we got over the bumps
and bruises over the years, I still remember that feeling in the pit of
my stomach and the ache in my heart......she probably never knew what
she should and should not say......you are  sensitive and caring enough
to ask.  Good Luck.  Judi
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: Tamara Shaffer <SASTLS@mvs.sas.com>
Subject: Re: manual pages for baby
Date: Fri, 22 Jan 1993 17:20:00 GMT
Organization: SAS Institute Inc.

>in article: <30664@castle.ed.ac.uk> Jeremy Henderson wrote:
>
>
>
>BABY(1)                  USER COMMANDS                    BABY(1)
>
>NAME
>     BABY - create new process from two parent processes
>
>SYNOPSIS
>
>     BABY [ -sex ] [ -name ]
>
>DESCRIPTION
> [witty tecnical documentation deleted]
 
Thanks for the laugh!!  Write more!!
 
TAMARA
mommy to Melissa (5/1/91) and ? (due 5/8/93)
Newsgroups: misc.kids

My daughter does the breath holding routine.  I think it first started when
she was about 16 months (she is 19 months now).  When she gets hurt or really
mad (or both in the case of her 3.5 yr old brother hitting her), she will
let out one scream and then do the silent scream.  Usually she will not go
quite a far as your daughter did.  Her lips would turn blue and she would
get alittle stiff, and her eyes would roll back alittle.  Then she would
relax and start breathing and crying again.  She would not actually pass
out, just kind of gray out.  I have noticed the severity of the incidences
becoming less.  I haven't decided if the frequency is less or not.

In talking to my doctor, he said it is important to not make a big deal
of the incidences.  She is in no danger (assuming you make sure that she
will not fall and hit her head).  Her automatic breathing reflexes will
kick in before any harm could occur.  However, if you make a big deal
she could learn to do it on purpose to try to control you.  I will usually
just pick Kayla up and hold her if it is due to an injury.  If it is out
of temper due to my not allowing her to do something, I will make sure
she lying down and then ignore her.

Karen Helt
karen@hpisla.lvld.hp.com
From: oispeggy@ubvmsd.cc.buffalo.edu (Peggy Brown)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: Cats, babies, and allergies?
Date: 27 Jan 93 19:19:00 GMT
Organization: University at Buffalo
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41

In article <1993Jan27.182330.23314@murdoch.acc.Virginia.EDU>, ren@hopper.ACS.Virginia.EDU (Karen Prestemon) writes...
> 

Karen,

>I am planning on breastfeeding (I have read that it is a great way to
>keep a baby of an asthmatic from developing food allergies if done
>during the first six months), but will I also pass on my tolerance
>of the cats to the baby?  Does anyone have specific experience with this?

I can't comment on the breastfeeding part....

>I'm almost afraid to ask the people on rec.pets.cats!  They might tell
>me to keep the cats and get rid of the kid!!  :)

People will tell you all kinds of insensitive things, but they 
mean to help.:)  Zillions of people told me to give my cats 
weekly baths.  Well, my 14.5 year old cat Shayne would have 
croaked having weekly baths.  I would have had lacerations from 
battling with her, and it would have been a big disaster.

I became pregnant last August and got rid of my cats a few weeks 
later.  It wasn't easy and I felt very bad about it, but I think 
it was the best thing for the baby (and me too).

I have no asthma or respiratory problems, but I found out a few 
years ago - when battling sinus problems, that I'm allergic to 
cats.  My sinuses were a mess and kept causing migraines and 
infections.  After two surgeries, under general anesthetic - and 
many smaller procedures, they improved.  But to be around cats I 
had to take daily medication.  Both my OTO and OB/GYN strongly 
advised me to get rid of the cats so I could get off the drugs 
during my pregnancy.  I shouldn't have been on the drugs so long 
anyway, pregnant or not.

I found a good homes for both cats.  The 14.5 year old cat is 
with a close friend, and I see her pretty often.  The 5 year old 
cat is with a nice retired woman who writes to me about her 
progress.

Note, I'm not saying you should get rid of yours.  It sounds 
there is not need for something so drastic.  Just wanted to tell 
you my story.

Good luck!

- Peggy -
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: menon@boulder.Colorado.EDU (Ravi Menon)
Subject: Re: Toddler biting and AIDS transmission
Organization: University of Colorado, Boulder
Date: 28 Jan 93 18:11:21 GMT

jag@iti.org (Jacqueline A. Giles) writes:

>In article <1993Jan26.152031.2566@ccsvax.sfasu.edu> f_markwort@ccsvax.sfasu.edu writes:
>>My 17 month old was bitten by another toddler in her day-care class.
>>This boy has bitten at least one other child I know of. (Both bites drew blood)
>>The day care providers are contemplating requesting AIDS testing on the
>>biter if the bitten's parents request it. Does  anyone have any experience
>>with similar situations. Initially I didn't think it necessary, but
>>I really don't know the family of this little boy. 
>>Thanks,
>>Mary 
>>c/o f_markwort@ccsvax.sfasu.edu

>I think it is an appropriate reaction.  My daughter has been bitten
>ALOT at daycare and I finally went non-linear over it, especially
>since working in the medical field and finding out their are young
>children popping up with aids and no explaination for it.

>My child was repeatedly bitten by the same child.  The parents were
>not doing anything about it.  I feel if the parents of a biter are
>forced to get and pay for expensive aids testing each time the child
>bites, they will work harder to correct the problem.

>Biting can no longer be taken lightly.  Not at this time in history.

>Jackie Giles

>ps.  I suggested this to the daycare overseer who discussed testing
>with the parents.  Low and behold, my daughter has not been biten
>since.

Oh! But gee! There is no reason not to let little children with AIDS
attend school.  Hummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!?


Deantha


not Ravi, not his opinions, nor those of his employer,  nope they're
mine all mine!!!
From: amm@NeXT.COM (Alan M. Marcum)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Taking My Son Flying
Date: 26 Jan 93 21:43:52 GMT
Reply-To: amm@NeXT.COM (Alan M. Marcum)

One of the folks who reads rec.aviation.misc asked me to re-post
this story here, to misc.kids.

Finally, at long last, I took my son flying.  And it was wonderful.

Joshua's 2 1/2 years old, and loves to pretend to fly.  He has a
small plastic car dashboard that he places over his lap; it has
a steering wheel and gearshift lever, and an "instrument panel."  Well,
sometimes it's a car, but it's frequently an airplane.  Moreover,
one day he moved this thing into a corner between a couch and
the wall and the newspaper bin and made himself an airplane.
He sat in his "plane" for around a half hour (at about 2 years of
age!) making airplane noises.

He loves a series of books about Budgie, a little helicopter.

Josh has enjoyed sitting in planes I've been pre-flighting
(supervised by a friend who's a pilot or by my wife, Barb,
who, though not a pilot, has taken both ground- and airborne-
based pinch hitter (tm) training), playing and looking around.

And, we've been on a few trips aboard airliners, which he's
enjoyed, and on which he's been very well behaved.

So, why'd I wait so long?  My wife's afraid of flying.  Though
she goes with me, she doesn't like it.

Well, we finally got to the point that she admitted that, indeed,
I *would* be taking Josh flying one day.  And she admitted that,
even if someone else went with us, she didn't want to miss being
in the plane, too.

Then, this past weekend came, and the days were sunny.  This comes
after this part of the world has seen weeks of rain and clouds.
(We need the water, so I'm certainly glad for it, but it sure was
nice to see blue sky and feel warm sunshine and calm winds!)  And
I said we should take Josh flying.  There were neither forecasts
nor reports of turbulence, the Club had a plane available, so...

On Sunday, the 24th, Josh went for his first light plane ride.
Mooney 5783D.  We took off from Palo Alto, flew across the Bay,
did a nice, gentle turn to the left and then a 180 back to the
right.  Palo Alto uses right traffic, and Josh was on the right
side of the plane (his choice), so his wing was down for 'most
every turn.  And, because of the East-West Shrine Game at Stanford
Stadium, three blimps were in the air (which is why we crossed the
Bay instead of heading out over Stanford).

We plugged in the intercom, and Josh had his headset on.  He showed
no inclination to remove it.  I looked back at him (he was in the
back, next to Barb), briefly, twice; both times he had a big, big
smile on his face.

This morning:

	Me:	"Josh, what'd you do yesterday morning?"
	Josh:	"I went flying!"
	Me:	"Who was the pilot?"
	Josh:	"Daddy!  And Mommy was the co-pilot.  And I was
		the co-pilot."
	Me:	"What airplane did we take?"
	Josh:	"A Mooney airplane!"

Ah, it was SO sweet!
--
Alan M. Marcum
NeXT Tech Support
amm@NeXT.COM
From: tigger@satyr.Sylvan.COM (Grace Sylvan)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: SCAREY breathing incident
Date: 24 Jan 93 20:17:05 GMT
Organization: Sylvan Associates

One of my friends has a daughter who stops breathing and passes out
when she's very upset... she's going to be 2 in a couple of months.
It's kinda scary to see, especially when you're not used to it, but if
they get to the point of passing out, normal breathing resumes
immediately.

Blowing in the face of a young child causes them to inhale. That
technique is used at the YMCA to help toddlers learn to go underwater
- count to three, blow in face, toddler takes a breath, then you lower
the child under for a second. I never thought of using it to stop the
holding breath spells, though.
-- 

Tigger (Grace Sylvan)                Mom of Katherine Yelena, 8/8/89,
tigger@satyr.sylvan.com              Corey 1/31/91; we loved him so,
                                     Robin Gregory born 2/28/92

 "It seems to me that our large goal is to find the ways to help our
 children become humane and strong."
 
              - Dr Haim Ginott quoted by Adele Faber & Elaine Mazlish
Xref: sparky misc.kids:33246 misc.jobs.misc:8871
From: kerry@brabo.esd.sgi.com (Kerry McCracken)
Newsgroups: misc.kids,misc.jobs.misc
Subject: Re: Is There A Mommy Track for Technical Professionals?
Date: 23 Jan 93 02:38:57 GMT
Organization: Silicon Graphics, Inc.

In article <1993Jan21.201315.11573@news.vanderbilt.edu>,
sayre@ctrvax.vanderbilt.edu (Frank Sayre) writes:


|> 
|> >But let's face it,
|> >you chose to have the younguns, so you are going to have to sacrifice
|> >SOMEWHERE, whether it's taking your younguns to a daycare center, 
|> >or working part-time [if possible] or staying at home and raising
|> >the younguns and adjusting your lifestyle to a lower income.  
|> >Obviously, these things should have been thought about BEFORE you
|> >had the younguns, but you now have to live with your mistake. 
|> 
|> Mistake!  #%^!($)&@%&*#@(@&.!!(%$&(*$&*$&@(#@($&(!)$*. 
|> HhnHmmm!  Keith, boy, you need to work on your choice of words. You
|> are WAY out of line here.

"Out of line" is an understatement ......

|> >Whatever you do, please do your co-workers a favor and choose one
|> >or the other.  Don't shortchange them by staying at home when the
|> >youngun coughs one time, or rush out in the afternoon when the
|> >school calls to have you pick up the youngun cause he sneezed.  
|> >Your coworkers deserve to have someone there that they can depend on
|> >to do their share.
|> 

Who's really being short changed?  Sorry Billy ... you'll just have to deal
with that flu on your own, I have a meeting! OR ...  I don't have time to
sit and read with you ... maybe you'll pick that up in our WONDERFUL school
system.  Geez ... get your priorities straight!  

|> My own experience is that people with families are often VERY 
|> dedicated to their jobs, in part as a result of their desire to
|> guarantee 
|> security for their children. Often the benefits of this dedication more
|> |> than make up for lost time during a child's illness. To assume
|> anything 
|> less of the original poster is simply not fair. And I daresay that many
|> managers would agree with what I'm saying.
|> 

It would be REALLY nice if we could all go back to the 50's ala Ward and
June Cleaver.  Unforetuneatley, our "trickle-down" economy which has been
blasting the average American on the head does not ALLOW for Mommy to stay
home and Daddy to go to work.  Not to mention how many single parents who
are out there (both men and women).  Rather than chastizing people for not
adhereing to some unattainable life style ... let's deal with the vast
reality of Mom and Dad working.  Both parents having to deal with the sick
children etc.  

Do we work to live .... or live to work? 

|> Frank
|> 
|> 
|> ============================================================
|> Frank C. Sayre
|> sayre@ctrvax.vanderbilt.edu

-- 
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Kerry McCracken                          email = kerry@esd.sgi.com
IMSD Manufacturing Engineer (Indigo)     phone = (415)390-3371
Silicon Graphics Inc.
Mountain View, CA
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
From: oispeggy@ubvmsd.cc.buffalo.edu (Peggy Brown)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: A few facts about circumcision
Date: 21 Jan 93 20:34:00 GMT
Organization: University at Buffalo
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41

In article <1993Jan21.183145.23395@news.acns.nwu.edu>, alper@sushi.psych.nwu.edu (Theodore M. Alper) writes...
>In article <1993Jan21.162656.6962@cbnews.cb.att.com> lib@cbnews.cb.att.com (Lib) writes:
>>In article <1993Jan20.202617.2000@news.acns.nwu.edu> alper@sushi.psych.nwu.edu (Theodore M. Alper) writes:
>>>
>>>2) Anecdotal evidence seems to indicate that, in later years, my son 
>>>   stands a better chance of finding others willing to perform oral sex 
>>>   upon him should he be circumcised. (Admittedly, should he be gay, the 
>>>   odds change: some porn seems to indicate that uncircumcised penises are
>>>   more desired --- though private communications make it clear that
>>  
>>Run that by me again. You're saying that there are a reasonable amount
>>of women who, assuming they are at a level of involvement with a man
>>that they will consider fellating him, change their minds based on the
>>fact that a guy is uncircumcised? Does anybody else think that?
>>
> 
>Besides, who wants to be fellated by someone who finds doing it to 
>you distasteful? (oh, geez, half the men under 25 are thinking "I do" -- 
>but I mean adults.) 

I think this is really getting ridiculous, but will add that I've
heard (don't know if its true) that uncircumcized males are not 
as interested in fellatio as circumcized males, since they don't 
require the extra stimulation.

- Peggy -
Newsgroups: misc.kids,misc.jobs.misc
From: dprmjc@inetg1.ARCO.COM (M. J. Cole)
Subject: Re: Is There A Mommy Track for Technical Professionals?
Organization: ARCO AEPT
Date: Thu, 21 Jan 1993 19:39:58 GMT

In article <1993Jan21.181141.21921@spider.co.uk>, alisonjw@spider.co.uk (Alison J Wyld) writes:
> B
> In article <1993Jan19.061356.14467@fuug.fi> an6814@anon.penet.fi writes:
> >
> >It seems as if a part-time career is non-existent in software engineering
> >and in professional/technical jobs in general.  It's looked down upon,
> >because you can't put in those long hours on the big projects.  I'm
>
> Are there such things as "job-shares" in the States ?  The idea is that
> you employ two people part-time to share a single job (obviously from
> the title).  They then work out who will take responsibility for which
> aspects.  These are starting to become more common here - mostly in
> areas that are traditionally female, nursing, secretarial and even
> teaching, but I imagine that once a company had introduced it in a
> clerical or secretarial area, it would be easier to persuade them to
> do so in a technical area.   It might be worth finding out whether
> this would be an option.
> 
> Bye
> 
> Alison 

Yes, ARCO allows job-sharing and supports it's application for a number of job descriptions.  There is even a managerial couple, here in Plano, who share a 
job.

Mary J. Cole
mjcole@arco.com
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: kat@netwise.com (Kathleen Nosbisch)
Subject: Parenting Teens
Organization: Netwise Inc.  Boulder, CO
Date: Thu, 21 Jan 1993 05:20:12 GMT


I would enjoy having other parents of teens to correspond with through
email.  I have tried, but can't get the mentioned alt.teen-parent group.

I have been reading this group for about 5 months, and have never posted
to it, but *do* enjoy reading how all of you parents of younger kiddos
are handling things nowdays!

I have two daughters, ages 11 and almost 14.  The 14-yr old is highly
entrenched into adolescense (much to my worry) and the 11-yr old is
trying hard to get there.

Anyone in a similar situation, write or post!

Thanks...

Kat

-- 
|-----------------------------------------------------------------------|
|	Kathleen Nosbisch		Netwise, Inc.			|
|	kat@netwise.com			2477 55th Street		|
|					Boulder, Colorado  80301	|
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: nance@cbnewsd.cb.att.com (nancy.l.colucci)
Subject: Re: More humorous developmental milestones
Organization: AT&T
Date: Fri, 22 Jan 1993 15:43:51 GMT

In article <LOWRY.93Jan21160201@rotor.watson.ibm.com> lowry@watson.ibm.com (Andy Lowry) writes:
<Humorous child-development milestones mantioned>

>A common instance of the above milestone is when the baby develops the
>skill required to consistently wake up from a nap at the exact moment
>Mommy and Daddy are sitting down to dinner.  The drive to prevent
>Mommy and Daddy from enjoying a simple meal together can be very
>strong.

This drive can also manifest itself when single-mommy is cooking dinner
for her very first post-divorce date.  Just about the same time the
Amaretto is cascading into the stemware, the fireplace is responding with
soft crackles and sparks, and the lights dim with a mind of their own ...

"MOMMMMM-EEEEEEEE!" comes the call to duty.  Even if it's well past midnight,
they have this radar.  It's why some of us learn to envelope ourselves with a
circle of friends who are in the same predicament for practical babysitting.

And we learn quickly!
-- 
-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+
Nance Colucci                                      att!ihlpl!colucci
    "Babies feel a lot better going in than they do coming out."
-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+-+*+
From: prevmary@otago.ac.nz
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: nipple confusion and feeding newborn glucose-water???
Date: 29 Jan 93 10:13:13 +1300
Organization: University of Otago, Dunedin, New Zealand

>   But how can you?  You are not allowed in the nursery.  The nurseries
>   are locked up.  You can only look through the window and see them
>   washing your baby.  We did have rooming-in, but they still take
>   the baby away for washing, paper-clothes changing, and probably
>   glucose water.  During visiting hours, all babies are wisked back
>   to the nursery for security reasons.  And during one of those visiting
>   hours I saw a nurse give my son a pacifier but couldn't do a thing
>   about it.  He loved it, and still loves his pacifier today!

Is this really true????? I cannot believe you are not allowed in the nursery.
It sounds awful. With my first born I put her in the nursery for one night and
the rest of the time she was with me. My second stayed in the nursery the whole
time as he yelled so much he woke the whole ward up, BUT I stayed in the
nursery the whole time with him and yes that includes the night he got
dehydrated and I sat up all night with him.
Noone but me ever bathed my babies or changed their nappies until I got home
where any help was welcomed.
My visitors cuddled both kids and gooed and gaaaaed over them.

Goodness this sounds awful
Mary Jane
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: nfh@leland.Stanford.EDU (Nancy Fisher Hansen)
Subject: Re: SAFE SEX or SAFER SEX?
Organization: DSG, Stanford University, CA 94305, USA
Distribution: na
Date: Mon, 25 Jan 93 20:22:53 GMT

In article <1993Jan25.185255.22318@netcom.com> shannah@netcom.com (Teri Miller) writes:
>In article <16B61ADAE.M18611@MBVM.Mitre.Org> M18611@MBVM.Mitre.Org (Kathy Wilk) writes:
>> 
>>  If you talk about sex with a condom, use the correct term - SAFER sex.
>>If condoms are AIDs-proof (and I don't mean 99.1%), please clarify this
>>matter for me.
>
><sigh>  OK, let's see now: I cannot say "we are pregnant", and now I
>cannot say "safe sex".  What else can't I say?  

IMHO, the distinction between "we are pregnant" and "safer sex" is
a big one.  Although I don't usually make a big deal about whether
to say "safe sex" and "safer sex," I will most definitely say the 
latter with my children.  It is simply a more accurate use of the 
English language.

>Is this really necessary?  If you want to be excruciatingly correct,
>knock yourself out.  I think it's completely inappropriate, though,
>for you to correct my usage, especially when my usage is correct
>according to the rules of common usage, albeit as a slang term.

The original poster may be trying to be "excruciatingly correct,"
but if we somehow convince children that having promiscuous sex
while using condoms is safe behavior, they could very well end
up "excruciatingly" dead!

>*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*
>Teri Miller                    tmiller@cisco.com -or- shannah@netcom.com
>*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*--*


	--Nancy Hansen
	nancy@d31ha2.Stanford.EDU