From: anderson@macc.wisc.edu (Jess Anderson)
Subject: Re: sexuality as a private matter
Organization: Madison Academic Computing Center, UW-Madison
Date: Sat, 29 Aug 92 02:29:54 GMT


In article <1992Aug28.164436.4335@cis.ohio-state.edu>
amz@iguana.cis.ohio-state.edu (Arnold M Zwicky) writes:

One of the times when I miss the vigor of Clay Bond most is
when the topic of erotophobia comes up; he was *quite*
something on that topic (as on many others).  You and Jack
are in effect labeling the Sarver argument for "keeping it
private" for what it is: blatant discrimination.

The classic derivation of erotophobia (and it is a true
phobia) is guilt.  Anyone raised in this incredibly Puritan
society (yes, there are even worse ones than ours) is
virtually bound to hold a large number of anti-sex
attitudes.  They dress these feelings up in various kinds of
prudery drag, then start mouthing all sorts of
self-deceptions so they won't be brought to book innerly.

>why, in fact, should *anyone* consider their
>sexuality to be a "private" matter (not for public knowledge
>or discussion)?  

Because it has been drilled into their brains for a long,
long time that it's bad bad bad to do *it*.  Why, we might
be *beasts*!  Couldn't have that, because then we couldn't
be all those ideals expounded in Holy Writ.

You can be very bold about being wealthy.  In fact, you're
*supposed* to be ostentatious about it unless you've had the
money at least 100 years.  Like money is good good good.

You can be *very* bold about being violent, which in our
society is sanitized by calling it bravery.  If you're an
especially good killer -- you don't get caught and you
murder only *approved* targets, they give you medals and
honors, or make you President.

But lust, oh no, that's wicked.  That's Satan at work,
that's dirty, that's disgusting, that you must do in the
dark.  Never mind that 99.99999999% of species that reproduce
sexually do so in plain view of anyone who looks, but *we* are
"better." So even "they" do it in the dark (pick your
sense).

Then if *we* do it, oh lord then people start having a real
shit-fit, don't they?  They go completely bonkers.  Like
Sarver; he's bonkers about sex, anyone can see it but him.

>surely this is as important a fact about people as their
>sex, or age, or occupation, or for goodness sake, *hobbies*
>(about which people exchange information publicly all the
>time), right?  

*We* know this, of course, but then we had help.

>it's something that is relevant to new people you meet, and
>of course to your friends.  it's information they need and
>(should) want, if they are to treat you in any but the most
>superficial fashion.

But that's the whole point, that's it exactly.  If the
oppressors want to treat you in any fashion, it surely isn't
going to be better than superficial.  The perfect model is
the news media, you know, the paid liars who give honest
journalists a bad name and -- well, don't get me started.

So that they can treat us in the most superficial fashion,
they do their level best to keep us from getting the
information we need (think about that in the context of the
present forum, maybe).  An ignorant population is easier to
divide and control.  If they succeed in getting us all back
in the closet, they can perpetuate the myth that we don't
exist, or if we exist, that we're bad.  Of course, most of
us know this; but amazingly, some of us don't.

>this is not the same thing as describing your sexual acts in
>detail to new people you meet.  but then they don't do that
>either.

Unless somebody asks.  Then *they* do, but we still don't,
not without looking over our shoulder or shutting the bedroom
door -- or, and it relates -- shutting some of our own out.

>arnold (who *does* say some of this to you...)

But he is *very* bold and *extremely* illegal, of course.
Maybe there's a god after all.

<> You can't bring gays out of the closet if you keep love and
<> affection in.  Period. -- Michelle Elliott
-- 
Jess Anderson <> Madison Academic Computing Center <> University of Wisconsin
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