From: mece21x@elroy.uh.edu (Yesudas, Michael)
Newsgroups: alt.culture.kerala
Subject: First Experience
Date: 15 Oct 92 17:57:00 GMT
Organization: University of Houston
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41

When I first came to the US, I had a lot of funny experiences. As a person
who basically converts everything into Malayalam, process in the same language
and then converts back, I had lots of trouble here. And I have never
never followed more than a few words in any James Bond movie. 

And so when the person was trying to sell me a subscription of the Houston
Chronicle, I mistook it that he was telling me that I could make free 
phonecalls to India. So that is my English processing capability. Coming
from Kerala I never felt that it was a major handicap not to know the twists
and turns of the English lingo. 

Anyway, I was sitting outside the apartment, reading the T.V. guide, trying
desperately to make out when the programs end. I was told by my host that
the next door people have got recently married and so don't knock on their
door even if the house is on fire. Suddenly the door of the neighbouring
house swung open and out popped a plumpish guy in his 30s. He gave me
a naughty smile. I smiled back. (Smiles know no lingo) Then he said Hello.
My straining ears deciphered the wheat and the chaff in it. I knew the
reply, Hello. Then came the next question. He mumbled something. I wanted to
say "Entherappi, parayinankilu thelichu para". (I am from Trivandrum and
think that this is pure Malayalam) But then realizing that the sayyipp
cannot get my lovely and only palindromic language in the world (Vanaranmar
enthariyunnu vibho!) I said with all my effort, "SorRy, Can you please
Repeat that?" But surprisingly, inspite of all the accent that the people
from all the rest of India had warned me about, (I speak with a very strong
accent, and I think that English is pure too) Our good natured sayyip picked
it up. (Pretty good CPU,I observed) And sayyip without bating an eyelid,
cleared his throat, began to say. My ears where standing as if Kaiser (
nothing to do with Wilhelm II, this one is only a "shwanan") will be doing,
when he suspected a foulplay in or around the house.
Sayyip spoke. I heard. Yes! It was "How do you do?" (I am not sure whether
I heard the question mark or not, but for those of you who are strong on
structural side of the prose and poetry, I'll leave it here) And I was 
thrilled with life. Yes I have hit the jackpot! I have communicated with
the first sayyipp. (No, you are wrong. At the Consulate I told what I wanted
to do and they told me what ever they felt like saying, because it was their
consulate, not mine. Later on I discovered that the same is the case with my
consulate too. No, again you are wrong. I found out that they used the sign
language on the flight, and so I told everything from puttu to parippu vada
and kadala to kanthari in sign lingo)
But then my CPU told that the Sayyip, (who my memory recalled was married
recently) had asked a very dangerous question. He basically as my translated
version told me that, he basically wanted to know how I did that. I knew 
people were very free here, but I did not know that you can also make extra-
marital enquiries to your neighbor. That was stretching the limit. Nobody
was at home and the sayyip was over 6' tall. Muscular. I was scared. 
I gave my best smile possible, collected all that I could in my two hands,
and ran inside......
Inside, in the safe sanctuary of the shell rock walls of the apartment, I
whispered to myself "Sayyippe, you do it whichever way you want. Please
don't ask me. It is too personal"
Sincerely
Michael

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|  Michael Yesudas         |  The control of the means of production   |
|  Mechanical Engineering  |  of wealth is the absolute control of     |
|  University of Houston   |  human life itself                        |
|  mece21x@jetson.uh.edu   |                    --   Hilaire Belloc    |
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Newsgroups: alt.culture.kerala