HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: walker@superman.jsc.nasa.gov (Doug Walker)
Subject: Re: Jokes to offend almost everybody (repost, these aren't my jokes)
Reply-To: walker@superboy.jsc.nasa.gov
Organization: NASA Johnson Space Center
Date: Fri, 4 Sep 1992 14:32:54 GMT

In article <1992Sep04.003942.20583@bnr.ca>, bcash@crchh410.BNR.CA (Brian Cash) writes:
|> In article <Bu0z2z.Evx@scd.hp.com>, tim@hpdstma.ptp.hp.com () writes:
|> |>Nuke the gay whales!
|>  
|> No, no, no, no!
|> It's :
|> 
|> Nuke the Commie Gay Baby Whales
|> 
|> :)
|> 

No, no, no, no!
It's :

Nuke the Commie Gay Baby Whales for Christ

:-)

Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: charb@Cadence.COM (Sue Charbonneau)
Subject: Re: ASCII ART REPOST FROM SEPT 1990 (-VERY LONG)
Organization: Cadence Design Systems, Inc.
Date: Tue, 25 Aug 1992 18:26:08 GMT


monica@apollo.HP.COM  (Monica Nelson)
Regarding your request for a license plate:

"I am still hoping some of you will have a few witty
ideas for my license plate for my car. combination
of 6 letters/numbers/characters come on I know there
must be some good ones out there!!!
                                     Enjoy,
                                        Monica"
---------------

Since your name is Monica, how about "Monikr."
Too bad "Moniker" has too many letters.
Enjoyed your ASCII ART.

Newsgroups: rec.humor,soc.culture.polish,alt.censorship
From: podgorny@npac.syr.edu (Marek Podgorny)
Subject: Re: Polack joke
Organization: Northeast Parallel Architectures Center at Syracuse University (NPAC)
Date: Sun, 30 Aug 92 10:46:40 EDT

In article <1992Aug28.154306.17938@lmpsbbs.comm.mot.com> marios@ecs.comm.mot.com (mario smarduch) writes:
>>
>> <stuff deleted>
>>
>> ........... passed some BBs right?  Lord No!, he replied, worse than that;
>>I was downstairs jerking off and shot and killed the dog!
>>
>>
>>Cheers!
>>
>>
>>      
>>Mike Thompson                 |    It's true, forgiveness IS easier
>>Unisys UNIX Systems Group     |    to get than permission. ;-) 
>>unislc!miket                  |              -----------
>>miket@unislc.slc.unisys.com   |    My employer is profoundly grateful
>>                              |    that I speak only for myself.
>
>What kind of idiot are you? Look at the group title: soc.culture.polish
>this has nothing to do with dog jokes. So why don't you post this crap
>in rec.humor.
>
>

Mario, please! You are becoming a nuissance. Take a deep breath, look
at the headers, and stop making fool of yourself.
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: bcash@crchh410.BNR.CA (Brian Cash)
Subject: Re: N-Man #4-- Rapidly becoming a collector's item!
Reply-To: bcash@crchh410.BNR.CA (Brian Cash)
Organization: Bell-Northern Research Ltd.
Date: Fri, 04 Sep 1992 00:16:18 GMT

>Jeremy_Reimer@ |"Anti-ninjas were the most feared assassins in the world.
>mindlink.bc.ca | Instead of appearing out of thin air, throwing metal stars
>---------------| and messing around with bo staffs and numchuks they simply
>aka THE JAGUAR!| shot people and then drove everyone mad with pointless
>---------------| conspiracy theories for years afterwards."
>Stealth Sig#42 |  --From "N-Man #3"

Hey!  That's from The Tick!  Thief! Thieeeeeeeef!!!!!!

(BTW, cool series.  How about a Tick - N-Man crossover?)

Brian /-|-\
==============================================================
"To be, or not to be" - F.Bacon
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: mark@nwra.com (Mark Baldwin)
Subject: Re: nursery rhymes
Organization: Northwest Research Associates, Inc.
Date: Thu, 3 Sep 1992 21:44:06 GMT

Sing a song of sixpence, a pocketful of rye.
Four-and-twenty blackbirds baked in a pie.
When the pie was opened, the King did have a fit
Cause they all burst and made a mess of guts & worms & shit.

    )_ _               -------------------------------------------    
   /  ) ) _        /       Mark Baldwin - mark@sparky.nwra.com
  /  / / / / /\_  /_/  Northwest Research Associates, Bellevue, WA
 /  / /_(_/_/  (_/ \__ -------------------------------------------  
Newsgroups: rec.humor,soc.culture.polish,alt.censorship
From: Mark Kovarski <kovarski@zooid.guild.org>
Subject: Re: Polack joke
Organization: ZOOiD BBS
Date: Mon, 31 Aug 1992 23:56:52 GMT


People should relax a bit and take life as a joke. This is the
1,424,343,234,234 message I see regarding racial/ethnic jokes. If you want to
argue, you should also consider jokes at certain groups as well as female and
males. All it comes down to is, tell whatever you want to tell people but keep
it in the appropriate conferences (rec.humor). I can give you a 10 page essay
on this subject but it totally useless. I personally don't care if somebody
tells a joke that might be offensive to my origin (I am so many that I have a
real hard time remembering). As far as females is concerned, I dig 'em. As
long as one has ball savvy and knows how to work the prong, I DON'T CARE WHERE
THEY ARE FROM!!! As you can see, I am looking for a romantic relationship. ;-)

Mark K.
PhD in sexual engineering. Specialising in hands-on experiences.
From: todd@uvmark.uucp (Todd Cooper)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Hurricane center joke
Date: 25 Aug 92 21:38:35 GMT
Article-I.D.: uvmark.1992Aug25.213835.37236
Distribution: usa
Organization: VMark Software, Inc.

Heard from the National Hurricane Center in Coral Gables, Florida during the
peak of the Andrew Hurricane:

"I don't know how fast the wind is blowing, the wind speed indicator blew away"
-- 
+++++ Just leaving a boring signature. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Todd Cooper         (uvmark%todd@merk.com uunet!merk.com!uvmark!todd)
Snail Mail: Vmark Software, 30 Speen Street, Framingham, MA 01701 USA
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: slater@tpocc.gsfc.nasa.gov (Don Slater)
Subject: Re: American joke (Re: Polack joke ?)
Organization: Computer Sciences Corporation
Date: Tue, 1 Sep 1992 01:38:27 GMT

You forgot the 10 scientists from the EPA to do an environmental impact study.
From: dh0a@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu (DONALD L. HARDY)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Need Dan Quayle jokes...
Date: 26 Aug 92 13:27:23 GMT
Organization: Lehigh University

>Subject says it all....do you have any?

Just pick up the newspaper on any given day...

D.
-- 

******************************************************************************

Donald L. Hardy                                    Office of Physical Planning
Project Planner                                    Lehigh University
dh0a@lehigh.edu                                    (215) 758 5110
From: cybapunk@hovel.welly.gen.nz (Phil Ross)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: .ASCII PICS.
Keywords: Pah
Date: Mon, 31 Aug 92 15:14:36 +1200
Distribution: World
Organization: The Hovel Bulletin Board System

<ISSJXS@BYUVM.BITNET> writes:

> FOR EXAMPLE
> .                /"\
> .               |\./|
> .               |   |
> .               |   |
> .               |>*<|
> .               |   |
> .            /'\|   |/'\
> .        /'\|   |   |   |
> .       |   %%%%%   |   |\
> .       |   |   |   |   |  \
> .       | *   *   *   * |>   >       UP YOUR'S
> .       |                  /
> .        |               /
> .         |            /
> .          \          |
> .           |--/'''\--|
> .           | |--+= | |
> .           |--\.../--|
> 
> NOW THATS CREATIVE

Creative, maybe.  But not funny.  So go put it in rec.ascii.pics, not
rec.humor.

--
cybapunk@hovel.welly.gen.nz    X Phil Ross
cybapunk@tornado.welly.gen.nz  X Sysop of The Hovel BBS
cybapunk@sideways.welly.gen.nz X Author of Lords And Ladies, _THE_ BBS door!
     ... If at first you don't succeed, redefine success ...
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: gilmore@venice.sedd.trw.com (Larry Gilmore)
Subject: Re: try these on for size ...
Followup-To: /dev/null
Organization: TRW Systems Engineering & Development Division, Carson, CA
Date: Wed, 2 Sep 1992 15:43:30 GMT

In article <1992Sep2.005757.28172@cs.umb.edu> kwm@ra.cs.umb.edu (Kevin W. McAuley) writes:
>
[tons deleted]
>
>					--- chevyn

Is this who you are when you're not Steven Wright?

-- 
Larry A. Gilmore             Internet: gilmore@venice.sedd.trw.com
TRW SEDD, DH1/2849
P.O. Box 6213                Phone:    (310)764-3318
Carson, CA 90746             Fax:      (310)764-3946
From: gilmore@venice.sedd.trw.com (Larry Gilmore)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: STOP this Crap
Date: 31 Aug 92 15:01:26 GMT
Followup-To: rec.humor
Organization: TRW Systems Engineering & Development Division, Carson, CA

In article <a0fnb!f.rdc@netcom.com> rdc@netcom.com (Rachel Dafni Christy) writes:
>IN TALK.BIZARRE rone@aludra.usc.edu (Ron Echeverri) writes:
>)
>)Quit the feminist/antifeminist bullshit.
>)This is talk.bizarre.
>)We hate men and women alike.
>
>I'd like to concur.
>
>Post to:		If you:
>
>talk.bizarre		hate men, hate women
>rec.arts.startrek	fear women
>alt.feminism		hate men
>soc.religion.christian  love white americans
>alt.rap			hate white americans
>alt.wanted.moslem.gay	love sheep, hate jews
>alt.fan.gooley		love women (theoretically)
>alt.politics.bush	love bush
>alt.politics.homosexual love penis
>
>
>-- 
>--
>hugs, Rachel

To which group should we post if we hate Mario?

-- 
Larry A. Gilmore             Internet: gilmore@venice.sedd.trw.com
TRW SEDD, DH1/2849
P.O. Box 6213                Phone:    (310)764-3318
Carson, CA 90746             Fax:      (310)764-3946
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: dbushong@wang.com (Dave Bushong)
Subject: Re: Joke about JFK (because you asked, that's why!)
Organization: Wang Labs, Lowell MA, USA
Date: Fri, 04 Sep 92 02:01:35 GMT

matt@unidata.ucar.edu (Matt Hicks) writes:


>>>Why don't we crack jokes about Martin Luther's death, or John
>>>Kennedy's death?

>OK, here goes. I used to work in a restaurant, and, on the anniversary
>of JFK's assassination, I suggested to my boss that we should run a
>"two for one" shot special in the bar.

>And I know of at least one very inappropriate (actually, make that two)
>jokes regarding the assassination of MLK.

>And what about the one told by Dennis Miller, regarding Sirhan Sirhan:
>"Well Sirhan Sirhan came before the parole board the other day, and at
>his hearing, he told them, `If Bobby Kennedy was alive today, he would 
>tell you to set me free.' God, talk about tough breaks. The one guy who
>would have stood up for you, and you shot him."

>Plus, I was hearing Challenger/Christa McCollough(sp?) jokes within a 
>day or two of the shuttle explosion. 

>People can and do joke about everything. I'm sure that's a couple of
>versions of the psychology behind it. It's something that others are
>just going to have to learn to accept. However, one should also be
>aware of the company in which these jokes are told, so as not to hurt
>someone close to the joke's subject. Rec.humor readers should expect
>to have to do their own screening, since this is an open group and you
>come to it willingly. If you are easily offended then I don't think
>this is the place for you.
>--
>_________________________________________________  /\_/\  _________________
>Matthew  B.  Hicks     | Unidata Program Center | ((ovo))  The spotted owl:
>matt@unidata.ucar.edu  | UCAR, PO Box 3000      | ():::()  the other "other
>303/497-8676	       | Boulder, CO 80307-3000 |   VVV    white meat."   

So kill me (tm).  I copied the whole thing.

People make humor of some of the most devastating things.  Kennedy
being killed, sucked.  The Challenger thing sucked.  People make jokes
about it.  Why?  Who cares?  My divorce was official two days ago.
Big-time traumatic.  But have I *ever* made a joke about my ex-wife?

Could be.

:)

-- 
Dave Bushong, Wang Laboratories, Inc.
Project Leader, OCR products
Internet: dbushong@wang.com
From: cybapunk@hovel.welly.gen.nz (Phil Ross)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: You're Sooo Ugly Jokes
Keywords: Patooey
Date: Mon, 31 Aug 92 20:03:49 +1200
Distribution: World
Organization: The Hovel Bulletin Board System

ahmad@seas.gwu.edu (Aftab Ahmad) writes:

>  You're so ugly that doctor ran away before you were all out!

When you came out, your mother said  "What a treasure"
and your father said "Yeah, lets bury it"

--
cybapunk@hovel.welly.gen.nz    X Phil Ross
cybapunk@tornado.welly.gen.nz  X Sysop of The Hovel BBS
cybapunk@sideways.welly.gen.nz X Author of Lords And Ladies, _THE_ BBS door!
     ... If at first you don't succeed, redefine success ...
From: andrewc@spider.co.uk (Andrew Cannon)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Grammar
Date: 4 Sep 92 10:30:52 GMT
Organization: Spider Systems Limited, Edinburgh, UK.

In article <1992Sep4.104810.1@cc.curtin.edu.au> smackinl01@cc.curtin.edu.au writes:
>In article <!-ln!8#@lynx.unm.edu>, bantolph@carina.unm.edu (Bard's are the Best) writes:
>> 	Tis iz fer al u nurdz hoo, Ar stuk oN; kerrrektin gramir? wId diss
>> rtikel yoo kIN hav lotz uv funn: an kerect (stuf untle (yer hartz desir@
>> may be wile yer Buzy fiksin thiss u wil leve evry litel misteak Thatt 
>> apeerz in odder artikels an stopp ANoyiN de resst uv uss wid yer anel 
>> retentiv natur! hOO cars iff sumbudy fergot ann a-postrivfe merk sumware.
>> 
>> 
>> 	IFF ENYBUDY fIKSEZ DIS DEY R HOPLES!
>Perhaps your family doctor can suggest a good nasal de-congestant?
>-- 
>Simon.
>Have you got a form 27/b?

I tried Rot-13 on this but it did'nt work. Then I thought it was written in 
Welsh, but there was too many vowels. Then I got drunk and re-read it, now I
understand it perfectly 
-- 
|      Andy Cannon       |"Love is what seperates us from the animals"       |
| Misplaced Yorkshireman |                                                   |
|   Spider Systems Ltd   |"No, what seperates us from the animals is that we |
|  andrewc@spider.co.uk  |don't clean our own genitals with our tongue"      |
From: mcsweinberg@memstvx1.memst.edu
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: You know you're a
Date: 1 Sep 92 12:46:05 -0600
Organization: Memphis State University

Does anyone have the complete (or fairly complete) list of "You know you're
a Redneck..."

Please E-mail.

Thank You
rai.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Damn I wish I was your lover                       Raina Weinberg
I'll rock you till the daylight comes         Memphis State University
Make sure you are smiling and warm                Memphis, Tennesee
I am everything                            MCSWEINBERG@MSUVX1.MEMST.EDU
Tonight I'll be your mother I will
Do such things to ease your pain

Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: usenet@inesc.pt (USENET News System)
Subject: Re: BOFH HH
Reply-To: jota@tutor.UUCP (Joao Pedro Martins)
Organization: void INESC();
Date: Wed, 2 Sep 1992 16:53:23 GMT

In article <1992Sep1.171635.16643@tamsun.tamu.edu> news@tamsun.tamu.edu (Read News) writes:
>Can some one e-mail me the BOFH 
>
>cgl5564@tamuts.tamu.edu
>Chris
>Thanx
>

	Me too, pls.
*---------------------------------------------------------------------------*
| Joao Pedro Martins, Lisboa, Portugal                                      |
|                                           jota@tutor.UUCP                 |	
| "Seize the day... Well, sometimes, the day seizes back !" (Psychodrome)   |
| "It's not the kill... It's the THRILL of the chase..."    (Def Leppard)	|
*---------------------------------------------------------------------------*
From: gcp1815@Msu.oscs.montana.edu
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: .ASCII PICS.
Date: 28 Aug 92 06:35:50 GMT
Reply-To: gcp1815@Msu.oscs.montana.edu
Organization: Montana State University


  _
  ~ \    `o^o'
      \ __(") __
         (.-.)  \
          \ /__   \_
          /     \  ~
         |        \/  
        _|               

                                                       (___)
                                                       .o"o.
                                                       `-0-'
                                                      / | | \
                                                      \ \ / /
                                                       (/O\)
                                                       /   \
                                                      _|   |_
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: mcwg9235@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu (Marsha Cook Woodbury)
Subject: Woody and Mia, cont.
Summary: funny
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana
Date: Sun, 23 Aug 1992 22:17:14 GMT
Keywords: humor

someone wrote in saying "What kind of nitwit would
find humor in child abuse?"

reply:  The same sort of nitwit who likes Woody Allen movies.
-- 
Marsha Woodbury   marsha-w@uiuc.edu
"A metaphor is like a simile."
writing from Urbana, IL, courtesy of the University of Illinois
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: fulton@silver.ucs.indiana.edu (Ben Fulton)
Subject: Re: Clarke
Organization: Indiana University
Date: Fri, 4 Sep 1992 18:33:41 GMT

In <1992Aug28.210933.26833@dickens.com> jd@dickens.com (Joe Dudar) writes:

>Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.
>      -- A. C. Clarke

>Any sufficiently undocumented code is indistinguishable from magic.
>      -- Some frustrated kernel hacker.

Any technology distinguishable from magic is insufficiently advanced.
      -- I Have No Clue

-- 
ben
fulton@silver.ucs.indiana.edu
"Get the hell out of my way!" - John Galt
From: yaron@anchor.as.utexas.edu (Mr. Sheffer)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Confuscious says...
Date: 23 Aug 92 19:58:26 GMT
Organization: McDonald Observatory, University of Texas @ Austin

In article <s1073863.714313643@giaeb> s1073863@giaec.cc.monash.edu.au (Andrew Norman) writes:
>Confuscious says: "Wife not part of furniture, unitl screwed on bed!"

Jeez, this is so limited. You forgot the dinner table, kitchen counters,
bath tub, carpets, chairs and couches, besides the bed. Expand your
variety tonight!

Ronny
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: loon@underdog.ee.wits.ac.za (LOON M J)
Subject: Re: Christian Joke
Organization: Wits Electrical Engineering (Undergrads).
Date: Thu, 3 Sep 1992 13:13:08 GMT

>> I was exactly referring to filth like this, anyone that can post
>> a joke like this, I know that the person has no morals, and is
>> willing to do anything to make a hit. I have heard religious jokes
>> but this is cynic, calculated and out right blasphomous trying to
>> degrade the suffering of Christ. I don't understand how all you
>> Christians are just sitting back and allow this kind of stuff.

If Polack jokes are allowed then this is too. I don't agree with either, 
though. But I think cynicism is alright. There is a difference between the
racial/religious cynic and the racist. This has all been cynicism. 

--
Marc Loon <loon@underdog.ee.wits.ac.za>
Student No: 8807871/X (just thought you'd want to know)
University of the Witwatersrand
Johannesburg

Conversation: a voice competition between two people
in which the one taking a breath is called the listener.
From: jheath@CERIS.Purdue.EDU (Jim Heath)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Aggie Jokes
Date: 1 Sep 92 13:47:16 GMT
Organization: Center for Environmental and Regulatory Information Systems, Purdue University

How many Aggies does it take to eat an armadillo?






















3 - one to eat the armadillo and 2 to watch for cars.
-- 
"Land of song, said the warrior bard,           Jim Heath
Though all the world betrays thee.
One sword, at least, thy rights shall guard, (The Minstrel Boy)
One faithful harp will praise thee."         (Thomas Moore)
From: gvg@hplvec.LVLD.HP.COM (Greg Goebel)
Date: Mon, 31 Aug 1992 17:24:23 GMT
Subject: Re: American joke - potentially offensive - true story
Organization: Hewlett-Packard Co., Loveland, CO
Newsgroups: rec.humor

In rec.humor, lharris@upei.ca (Lora Harris) writes:

>    	In the blessed silence that followed, I got a bit of sleep.

Potentially offensive?  Good heavens, hardly anybody below the age of 30
would get it.

"Draftee?"

"Not a bit!  I feel fine!"

   Wile E. Coyote at the Acme Online Support Organization For The SouthWest
--
+----------------------------------------------------------------------------+
|                               DISCLAIMER                                   |
+----------------------------------------------------------------------------+
|   Who cares what I think?  I don't take MYSELF seriously, why should you?  |
+----------------------------------------------------------------------------+
| Greg Goebel                             NET:     gvg@hpislx                |
| Hewlett-Packard                         HP DESK: gvg(hpislx) / HP0900 / UX |
| MSO Marketing                           PHONE:   Telnet/303 679-3424       |
| POB 301 / MS-CU312 / Loveland CO 80539  FAX:     Telnet/303 679-5957       |
+----------------------------------------------------------------------------+
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: ashok@regulus.Inria.Fr (Ashok Kumar)
Subject: you are soo ugly
Organization: INRIA Sophia Antipolis, France
Date: Wed, 26 Aug 1992 11:52:34 GMT

you are sooooo ugly one wonders whether masturbation is a substitute for sex
or it is the other way round.
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: miket@unislc.uucp (Michael Thompson)
Subject: Re: STOP this Crap
Reply-To: miket@unislc.UUCP (Michael Thompson,B2C04,4560)
Organization: Unisys, Salt Lake City
Date: Mon, 31 Aug 1992 16:00:09 GMT

In article <1992Aug31.150126.21864@venice.sedd.trw.com> gilmore@venice.sedd.trw.com (Larry Gilmore) writes:
>In article <a0fnb!f.rdc@netcom.com> rdc@netcom.com (Rachel Dafni Christy) writes:
>>IN TALK.BIZARRE rone@aludra.usc.edu (Ron Echeverri) writes:
>>)
>>)Quit the feminist/antifeminist bullshit.
>>)This is talk.bizarre.
>>)We hate men and women alike.
>>

<News groups deleted>

>>alt.fan.gooley		love women (theoretically)
>>alt.politics.bush	love bush
>>alt.politics.homosexual love penis
>>
>>
>>-- 
>>--
>>hugs, Rachel
>
>To which group should we post if we hate Mario?

Maybe if we just ignore him he'll go away.

Mike
From: howeird@hplabsz.hpl.hp.com
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Rule of Thumb
Date: 30 Aug 92 04:28:13 GMT
Organization: HP Research Grants Program

According to palmer2@sscl.uwo.ca (The Econoclast):
>	What is the origin of the phrase, "Rule of Thumb"? I've been to
>several different libraries researching the origin of "rule of thumb,"
>and here's what I've found so far:
>[5 defintions deleted]
Reference #6:
The phrase "Rule of Thumb" originated with the government of the
Principality of Thumbe, which was located in what is now known as
Northumberland, during the times of King Arthur. While Arthur was
establishing his Camelot and Round Table, King Thomas (also referred to in
archaic sources as "Tom of Thumbe") was experimenting with a form of
government based on making educated guesses of what ought to be, and
allowing the legal system to apply these guesses to the prosecution of the
law. This system of estimating the damage done by a criminal, and setting
the fine appropriately, became known as the "Rule of Thumbe". Over time,
and with the dissolution of the Principality of Thumbe, the "e" was dropped
from the spelling, because, as a rule of thumb, the final "e" in English is
generally superfluous anyway.

================================================================ 
Howard Stateman    howeird@hpl.HP.COM  [Not an HP spokesman]
"I have the heart of a little child, and the brain of a genius
                     -- and I keep them in a jar under my bed"
================================================================ 
Anatomically Correct Bulletin Board (415) 8-jovial [Adults only]
================================================================ 
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: gfowler@javelin.sim.es.com (Gary Fowler)
Subject: Re: You're Sooo Ugly Jokes
Organization: Evans & Sutherland Computer Corporation
Date: Mon, 31 Aug 1992 14:27:22 GMT

bill@bain3.bain.oz.au (Bill Richardson) writes:

>Clarence W Robinson (clyde@brahms.udel.edu) wrote:
>> 
>> My favorite one is from "Sanford and Son":  Fred to Aunt Ester (sp?)
>> You so ugly I could stick yo face in some dough and make gorilla cookies.
>> 
>> classic



>If I woke up with you asleep across my arm, I'd chew my arm off.

This one is either from Fred Sanford or George Jefferson.  I can't quite
remember, because it's been so long.  You're so ugly that if snow were
attracted to ugliness, you'd be a walkin' blizzard.

Newsgroups: rec.humor,soc.culture.polish,alt.censorship