From: aaldoubo@copper.denver.colorado.edu (Anisa Alnoor Aldoubosh)
Newsgroups: soc.culture.arabic
Subject: Re: Arabic Names
Date: 28 Sep 92 06:22:04 GMT
Organization: University of Colorado at Denver

In article <nabeel.717477390@oracle.sce.carleton.ca> nabeel@sce.carleton.ca (Nabeel Ghuzlaan) writes:
>
>   Since I am an engineer, I think of it practically. The world in
>the mean time is a very bad place to have kids. It is a responsibility.

But does it take a rocket scientist to understand the practicality
and responsibility of having children?  :_)  I think you are unaware
of the fact that your statement contradicted your earlier one where
you said that if you had a son, you would name him Hisham - that the
problem was just in getting married.
 
>(I know (or imagine) it is fun too!) I can not guarantee that I can
>manage that responsibility. Because this matter is so much serious,
>the right decision is not to take the risk. However, based on my
>past experience in managing things, I predict that I will most likely
>act irresponsibly like always ... and get married ... and regret it!

You never know until you try it.  I don't need to quote anything
from Quoran Al-Kareem or give you a standard lecture on the blessings
of getting married.  You probably already know this.  My concern here
is that you claim to be a Muslim (some of your comments in s.c.a.
reflect that) while asking Allah to forbid something onto you that He
has made acceptable and halal to us human beings.

I don't mean for this to turn into a lecture, but I am afraid that I
have to interject my own personal feelings because we as Muslims are
obligated to help each other in any little way that we can - so please
do not misunderstand my intentions here.  As Muslims, we believe first
and foremost in the guidelines from Allah The Almighty to our Holy
Prophet (SAWS) not as a hardship, but rather, a blessing and an easement
of our minds and hearts.  Even if we fail to live up to these obligations
as Muslims, and in practicing our faith completely and most dutifully, we
should at least try to put our belief and trust in Allah (SWT) first and
ask Him (SWT) to help us and guide us in all aspects of life and in
everything that we do, including what may seem impractical and unreasonable
to us.  Allah is the best knower of all things - Subhanna Wa Ta'ala.

I think you just need to stop looking at everything from a secular
point of view and focus on the joys and happiness that a wife can offer -
and that a beautiful child - even his/her smile - can bring to your life.
I can empathize completely with you - I often have my own doubts and
worries over this (women have a lot to contend with over these matters),
but I still ask Allah that one day the situation will be right to have
beautiful children, insha'Allah - insha'amin.

Even if you are an idealistic person in wanting to raise your child in
a perfect world, it doesn't help your situation.  You just have to
accept the reality and do the best that you can with what you have.

That is life and human nature.  Just take it easy brother.

Anisa (Ohmjihad)
 
>   Cool it down, Anisa!

I'm totally calm.  And I hope little Jihad will be able to see
and play with his little Muslim friend, Hisham, one of these days ...
:-)
Newsgroups: soc.culture.arabic