From: bphdarcy@ubvmsb.cc.buffalo.edu (Sean J. Roc D'Arcy)
Newsgroups: alt.personals,alt.personals.misc
Subject: Re: What do women look for in a Guy?
Date: 23 Nov 92 15:47:00 GMT
Organization: University at Buffalo
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41

In article <22NOV199201014152@ducvax.auburn.edu>, cpearson@ducvax.auburn.edu (MISTYEYES) writes...
>In article <zoltar.06qh@glasgow.amigans.gen.nz>, zoltar@glasgow.amigans.gen.nz (Grant Thoms) writes...

>>My question is, why do women look for in a Guy?

>>Looks??  Money??? Sense of Humour?? or just personality?? It's a bit
>>confusing for us guys these days to know what to expect, even harder
>>when we have to make the first step. It seems that the step of the asking
>>out has been brought onto the guys shoulders to do, but I myself, wouldn't
>>mind at all if the gilr asked me! 

Well, in a way this question has a strange twist.  I think what many people 
would value most, is honesty.  And therefore just "being ones self," is 
about all one can do.  Everyone has got an interesting side, it all seems 
to matter how well they hide it.

An axiom is that if one changes to please another then they themselves 
become miserable in time.  Admittingly, all relationships need a measure of 
giving and compromise, but if one were to change their entire image, just 
to win over a "prize," them soon the novelty wears off.  And on the subject 
of girls asking men out, its happening.  Not quite 50% yet, but its getting 
there.

>Looks: beauty really is in the eye of the beholder, so yes,
>most women want to find someone that is pleasing for them to
>look at... but that means all types of women looking for all
>types of men :)

Well said.  As much as magazines like Glamour, try to make it seem 
otherwise, this applies to men also.  What one thinks is stunning may be 
bland to another.

>Money:  Not me, not that vain...

Ah, the greatest of misconceptions.  I don't know the greater fool, the one 
who marries for money or the sucker that buys a spouse.  To quote a famous 
rock star, "Some of the best affairs I have had are with rich doctors 
wives."  I think money and love a pretty widely seperated.  I think 
marriages for money are more of a tactical convience than anything else.

A friend of mine and myself got sick of seeing the "If Your Rich, I'm 
Single," bumper sticker,so we created a better one of our own: THE BEST WAY 
TO STAY RICH AND SINGLE IS TO NOT LET ANYONE KNOW.

>Sense of Humor: DEFINITELY ... it sure helps if you can 
>laugh together through the bad times as well as the good.

True.  
>>There's been a lot of talk on here lately of gentlemen and such stuff,
>>but how do you ladies class a Gentleman?? Kindness?? Personality?? Manners?
>>There are a lot of guys out there who are feeling lost in this subject
>>of love (including myself) and wehn it comes to knowing whats what,
>>it's very confusing.. 
>> 

A Gentleman is one who reveres honor, courage, kindness, manners and 
fairness.  His behavior towards men AND women should refelct respect and 
dignity.  I will admit that this term is becoming hard to define in the 
past few years.  A lot of the chivalrous traditions of the "male" relm are 
being frowned on.  For example, A few days ago I held a door open for a 
middle aged woman who stopped and told me, "I can open my own door, thank 
you."  I was a bit taken back since I would hold the same door for a member 
of my own sex also.  Even some of the old customs of "black tie" events are 
changing and I will admit it becomes easy to accidentally offend someone by 
what used to viewed as an act of common courtesy.

And as far as knowing the subject of love...  I think man has tried to 
understand it since he could first contemplate his own existance.  Look at 
Art and Song even back to the earliest days a written works.  But of cousre 
that's what makes it so nice.

SJRD
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