From: robg@citr.uq.oz.au (Rob Geraghty)
Subject: Re: In love more than once-Is it possible?
Organization: Prentice Centre, University of Queensland
Date: Sun, 8 Nov 1992 07:06:14 GMT

CE42@lafibm.lafayette.edu (CE42000) writes:

>In article <17871@autodesk.COM> jamesr@Autodesk.COM (James Rowell) writes:
>>Which brings me to my question to provoke a little discussion.
>>Have any of you REALLY been in love, and had it turn out disas-
>>trous only to find yourself deeply in love again?  How about peo-
>>ple like me?  That is, You've been in love and it hasn't happened
>>again (and you doubt it will).
>>.
>First of all, Welcome to ARCland James.  As for your posting, I can't
>say that I have been in love more than once.  However, I did truly
>love my last boyfriend and have not been involved with anyone since him.
>However, I am keeping the faith.  I do not buy into the idea of "one
>lid for every pot".  I think human beings have the capacity to fall in
>love numerous times, although it is never exactly the same twice.  Who
>knows, maybe you won't find anyone else, but I have a feeling that there
>is a good chance you will.

Thanks Emily - you have pointed out some things I would like to follow
up.  There's too many possibilities in this world to say that there is
only one person you will ever be in love with - or more to the point
*can* ever be in love with.  I happen to believe that there *is* one
person for each of us that would be the ideal one to spend our entire
life with.  But there may be other loves between where you are now and
where you will be when that one special person comes along.

Yes, I have *really* been in love twice.  At the same time, each
relationship had an element of infatuation in it.  The first time, I was
infatuated with her, the second time she was infatuated with me (oops -
I should point out that these were *different* ladies).

In the first relationship, we became close in a way that was simply
beyond explanation - we could feel each other's emotions, we would say
the same thing at the same time, we often knew what the other was
thinking.  Even so, there was a difference in our paths and goals that
probably doomed it all from the start.  I had to move interstate to get
a job, and six months later, she broke off the relationship.  And this
after having been shopping for engagement rings during the time I had
been living away from her.

Eight months later, I found myself in another relationship - this time,
we were friends and confidantes in a way that never happened in the
first relationship.  We spent every spare moments together, weekends
were wonderful fun, we shared many interests and seemed to be very
compatible... and yet that same closeness was never there.  We comforted
each other physically but there was never that same bond at another
level.  Other things crept in, and eventually we parted, though it was
difficult to see why, when so much was so good.

What is my point in all this?  Well, I have no doubts that I was
*really* in love both times.  The form of that love was quite different
in each case.  Why should it be the same when each person is so utterly
different from the next?

Most importantly - I know I can, and will love again.

I can hear Kate Bush singing in a certain song by Peter Gabriel -

"Don't give up!
 Please, don't give up."

Rob
Official Journeyman-Harper of the RFA

--
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Rob Geraghty               | 3 things are important to me 
robg@durian.citr.oz.au     | The gift of love, the joy of life
CITR                       | And the making of music in all its forms
Newsgroups: alt.romance.chat