From: albert@chain.ssctr.bcm.tmc.edu (Rick Jones)
Newsgroups: rec.arts.comics.misc
Subject: Re: Teen Titans
Date: 15 Oct 1992 17:28:28 GMT
Organization: Baylor College of Medicine, Houston, Tx
NNTP-Posting-Host: chain.ssctr.bcm.tmc.edu

In article <9228921.18111@mulga.cs.mu.OZ.AU> dyko@mundil.cs.mu.OZ.AU (Darren Yiu Ming KO) writes:
>During the Crisis, there's a whole bunch of Teen Titans. I didn't pick
>up anything related to the Titans until now..."Total Chaos". And I don't
>know what happened to some of the members, eg. Cyborg. I know Jericho
>was killed by his father..."Death-Stroke: Terminator", but for the others,
>I'm not so sure...

	No.......can't...hold..on.  Must...main....tain....control....

	BARGH!

	Nope, you can't hold me in, Rick.  I, Kid Frothing-At-The-Mouth,
must be heard.

	The current members of the New Titans are:
	Nightwing:  formerly Robin I, now stuck in a dorky new costume,
and must have had a lobotomy not to be able to tell the differene between
Mirage (see below) and Starfire.
	Starfire: alien huge chested warrior.  Also had a lobotomy, as she
keeps wanting to attack a quasi-teammate during a battle with a God Like 
Being.
	Changeling: doesn't have a lobotomy, but is hung up over Terra II,
who looks just like Terra I (who was a psycho bitch from hell).  He's the
green dude.
	Red Star: well, he hasn't had a personality since his one issue 
appearance in New Teen Titans #18 (or so).  A generic brick.  He's a Russian,
but you couldn't tell.
	Pantha: DIEDIEDIE.  ANOTHER Feral/Wolfsbane/WildcatII/Wolverine 
animalistic clone.  Blargh.
	Wildebaby:  A superstrong month year old.  Source of dumb jokes 
and "not the mama" humor.  DIEDIEDIE.
	Troia: Forerly Wonder Girl.  Proof that some folks can't handle 
post-partum depression.  Now suffering from Dark Phoenix Syndrome.  
BOOOOORRRRING.
	Phantasm: generic mysterious psychic entitiy composed of the dead
Danny Chase (a titan) and Arella (Raven's mom).

	[Jericho died [KILL THE EDITOR] because he was possessed by Trigon,
a dead villain.  Before he died, he had the power to turn non-corporeal and
possess other people's bodies.  He was also the most interesting Titan....]

	A bunch of "Team Titans" came back from the future (geez, sounds
more like X-men every second).
	Mirage: a shapechanger with the hots for Nightwing from the future so
she's got the hots for the present day one.  She kidnapped Starfire so she
could boink the bejeezus out of Nightwing, who must have been thinking with
thw wrong head when he noticed that "Starfire" couldn't fly, shoot starbolts,
or design a good costume.
	Terra II: a way to spur on interest by having her look and act like
the original Terra (who's dead).  Turns out, she's a clone, sorta.
	Nightrider: a vampire.  yawn.  the latest ish has him in the sunlight
when before he said he'd go "foosh" in the sunlight.  Love that editor.
	Kilowatt: generic energy projector.  double yawn.
	Redwing: has the closest to a real personality.  she has red wings.
(Boy, how long did it take her to come up with that name?)
	Prester Jon: AN INTERESTING CHARACTER.  He's an AI (actually Redwing's
brother 'trapped in a computer').  Unfortunately, they never use him.

	Here's the plot (if you could call it that):

	Okay, Troia's baby might/will grow up into a psycho called "Lord Chaos"
who will take over the world by 2001.  (Only 8 years from now).  In that 
8 years, a bunch of metahuman children will be born and grow up into teenagers.
I guess they grow fast in the near future.   Most are killed, but some
are rebels, the "Team Titans" (their mysterious leader has a hardon for the 
Titans).  They decide to go back into the past to stop the future.  Hmm,
definately an X-plot.  Anyway, their bright idea is, no, not to give 
her "the pill", or a talk on family planning.  Not to convince her to 
not have kids.  They want to kill her.  Not her baby, they don't even try
to get her to abort it (dodging the abortion issue like a speeding 
bullet....).  They have to kill _her_.  So, Lord Chaos finds out and goes
back to stop them from killing her.  
	Guess what happens......

	That's right....

		A  F I G H T  S C E N E.

	We've had 8 issues of fight scene, where nobody's acting like 
they have an IQ above Dan Qualy's.  


	Beats me what's going to happen next, I've dropped the titles, and 
I'm only going to get the last ish of "Total Chaos" because I'm a 
maschochist. 

........no...it happened again.  He took me over.

	Just don't mention "Titans Hunt" and I'll be okay.  Now THAT WAS DUMB.
-- 
Rick Jones				Systems Support Center
albert@bcm.tmc.edu			Baylor College of Medicine
Voice: 713-798-7352			standard disclaimers apply
"Reality is not the world, but the perception of the world." - Sneakers
Newsgroups: rec.arts.comics.misc