From: drh@Auspex.COM (David Ryan Hawley)
Newsgroups: alt.recovery
Subject: Re: My sobriety date
Date: 6 Jan 93 18:25:14 GMT
To: anon@anon.penet.fi
X-Anon-To: alt.recovery

In article <1992Dec28.232555.10626@fuug.fi> an3203@anon.penet.fi (Andrew) writes:
>I just thought I would provide an opposing viewpoint from
>the others who posted here on sobriety dates (or clean time).
>
>It's a nice little cliche, the one where a person's sobriety
>is based on how early in the morning he/she got up.
>
>I don't buy it however.  (The crowd says... WHAT??!)
>
I agree!  When i joined AA i had to drink 2 drinks before each meeting,
each of which consisted of a half a quart of Kahalua (coffee liquor),
and a half a quart of milk over ice!  I told everyone how spiritual i
was, they told me to "keep comming back".  I beleve it's also important 
to note i was drinking 18 cups of coffee a day, people thought it was
"brain damage" from alcohol, actually it was the coffee high.

It's true that we are all unique, and at different places.  I've seen 
people come into SLAA who mearly fantasize about cheating on their 
boyfriends, while others were child molestors, or had sex with 100 
partners a weekend.  Longevity, in the 12 step programs though *usually* 
requires some "changes in attitute".  What i really don't believe though 
is the sayings about "one program to cover all my problems".

I was falling asleep in the AA meetings within three months, partly because
I had "taken the cotton out of my mouth, and put it in my ears", and partly
because we didn't discuss the issues that led me to drink.  I know this is
AAnarchy, but it was true for me.  I was laughed at, ridiculed, and told to
sit down and shut up when i discussed: 1) my childhood, 2) my Sex-and_Love
issues, 3) coffee, 4) sugar, 5) my addictive use of credit, 6) my issues
with the abuse i was receiving in AA meetings, etc., etc., etc....

Today I go to more AA meetings than anything else, but I had to deal with
the majority of my real problems before I could get to this place.  Only
now do i appreciate the wisdon of the oldtimers, "I couldn't hear them
over the shouting of the people with 1-4 years".

These are the statistics, as i heard them:

Only one out of 29 makes it 30 days.
Once you make it a year, there is a 50% chance of getting another year.
At 3 years there is an 80% chance of getting another year, sober.
At 5 years, chances are you will never drink again.  

However, remember statistics don't apply in individual cases 
(as my sponsor tells me :-)

I'd be willing to risk a value judgment!  I'd bet the odds are much worse
in the other 12 step programs, which is why i focus on AA today.  It could
be my AA trained eyes, but I hear a LOT more crying about how life really
sucks, and how the programs don't work, in the other 12 step meetings i
go to.  I guess, i could get past all that when i had less time, and needed
to cry about my issues.  I say this to be fair, but i remember that I really
tried to focus on the recovery, and was positive at meetings even then
(which i learned in AA).  It's true that i was "needed" more in the other
programs, "service wise".  Even if this was only in my own eyes, it helped
me recover (it IS a selfish program).  Now that I've alienated the people
in the other 12 step programs, I finally fit into AA. :-)

The bottom line is, "Nobody who has worked *my* program has found it necessary
to drink for almost 7 years".

"Shields Up!  Prepared for Flames On"

George

Newsgroups: alt.recovery