From: gt7257c@prism.gatech.EDU (Jose R. Perez)
Newsgroups: rec.arts.movies
Subject: Under Siege -An incredibly arrogant review.
Keywords: So bad it hurt...
Date: 10 Oct 92 17:46:01 GMT
Organization: Georgia Institute of Technology


  OK,ok. Maybe I wasn't in the mood to watch a mindless action movie; I am
the same person that liked Lethal Weapon III, even while admitting that
it wasn't as good as the others. Howewer, the latest Segal picture didn't
look that bad, and since none of my friends would go see a Woody Allen movie
even if I paid them, I went to see it expecting a mild 'Diehard' rehash. Boy,
was I wrong!

   In the first half of the movie, we are already assaulted with Segals acting,
(He is not simply wooden; he is like a wall), gratuitous violence, an 
incredible plot, sexist and even more gratuitous nudity, and bad lines
that obviously were meant as jokes. By the end, it is obvious that hundreds of
navymen are no match for thirty armed Special Forces soldiers. Not once in 
the movie did Segal appear worried or undecided, which did not do much for
increasing the unexistent suspense. 

    Of course, in movies like these, there must be a sidekick, and a love 
interest. In these one we are given a two for one package in the form
of a Playboy model (in the movie), which only functions as a supposed
comic relief (by the way of extremely stupid unfunny lines), and to have
watering eyes and look away every time something bad happens in the movie. Oh,
of course, she appears naked from the waist up, and, of course, Segal kisses
her at the end after no development of their relationship; they did not even 
seem to be interested in each other. I have never seen so little chemistry
between two people in a movie.

    Often, the villain saves the movie; unfortunately, the villains here
are cartoonish, stupid and unfunny, unmenacing. How many movies have psycho
ex-Special Forces bad guys? Too many. I was able to predict the action
all throught the movie, including the moment where the sidekick saves the
hero from certain death, the scene where the bad guy can kill the hero but 
proceeds to explain his plan to him, the scene where we are shown the hero's
superiors are stupid, the scene where the bad guy loses his gun and has to
fight the hero hand to hand, etc... Simply said, this is moviemaking by the
numbers, boring, and potentially offensive in going for the lowest common
denominator of the audience.

My recommendation: If you go see it, bring a watch. You'll be looking at it
                   for most of the movie.
My rating: * out of ****. Rent Diehard. Read a book. Stare at the sky. Do not
                          waste your time on this worthless piece of celluloid.
 
   The real sad thing is that there are a lot of movies out that I would rather
have seen; once again, dragged in by my friends, which by the way, liked the
movie halfheartedly. They probably like wrestling too :-).

      


-- 
*Jose R. Perez           |" Really??" - Dr. Joel Fleishmann                   *
*Internet:               |-- " Cough it up, fuzzball." - H.S.                 *
*gt7257c@prism.gatech.edu|--                                                  *
**********************"There can be only one!"- Conner McLeod *****************