HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: kachun@spot.Colorado.EDU (Ka Chun Yu)
Subject: Re: Stupid pet tricks
Organization: University of Colorado, Boulder
Date: Mon, 7 Sep 1992 17:47:35 GMT

v222p9ns@ubvmsb.cc.buffalo.edu (A PFC, AND DAMNED PROUD TO BE) writes:

>In article <9209070409.AA20847@bottom.magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu>, cclaydon@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu (C Robert Claydon) writes...
>>My personal favorite has got to be the one where the humongous dog with the 
>>owner who's even taller than dave perches on top of a stick like a bird... just
>>incredibly silly.

>	Hi! Fantastic newsgroup. Was wondering when it would come about.

>	My favorite stupid pet trick (or was it a stupid human trick?) was the
>guy who would pour milk in his mouth, and the dog would drink the milk out of
>his mouth. Hysterical.

How about the recent one with the dog that took the earings out of its owner's
ear with its mouth?  That one really made me cringe.  Another good one that
night was the dog that went shopping and bought its "favorite" beer.

>>Rob

>						-Jeff

>===============================================================================
>\ Jeff Wilson  SUNY BUFFALO  | He shall know your ways, as if born unto them. /
>\ V222P9NS@UBVMS.CC.BUFFALO.EDU |                            -Dune            /
>\ WILSON@AUTARCH.ACSU.BUFFALO.EDU |===========================================/
>\---------------------------------| Why a spoon, cousin?  -Guy of Gisbourne   /
>\ I taught Rick Wakeman everything| Because it's DULL, you twit,              /
>\   he knows.  - me               | it'll hurt more!  -Sheriff of Nottingham  /
>\==============================================================================
>\ SUNY Buffalo does not support my opinions, and I wouldn't let them anyway.  /
>===============================================================================
-- 
*Ka Chun Yu                 * "Deputy dog dog a ding dang depa depa deputy     *
*kachun@spot.Colorado.EDU   *  dog dog a ding dang depa depa . . ."            *
*                           *                         --"Don't Let's Start"    *
From: ph111-bx@violet.berkeley.edu (;;;;7202)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: Favorite Bits
Date: 8 Sep 92 20:52:00 GMT
Distribution: usa
Organization: University of California, Berkeley
NNTP-Posting-Host: violet.berkeley.edu

And then there was the time Debbie Gibson was a guest keyboardist and
Paul was showing off her new line of perfume ("Electric Youth"?), spraying
it around and saying it had a "young, fresh scent".  Letterman then says,
"Yeah, the place smells like a house full of teenagers."
From: pgybass@ubvmsd.cc.buffalo.edu (michael patrick swain)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: world's most dangerous band: originally...
Date: 7 Sep 92 06:49:00 GMT
Organization: University at Buffalo
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41

Ah, the good old days:  Hiram Bullock on guitar, and my man Steve Jordan
on drums.  Maybe we can get Anton to crank up that snare!

michael patrick swain
From: rchafetz@cephalo.neusc.bcm.tmc.edu (Ross Chafetz)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: Dave's trips out.
Date: 11 Sep 1992 04:50:20 GMT
Distribution: usa
Organization: Baylor College of Medicine, Houston,Tx

In article <18dqvtINNql1@agate.berkeley.edu> ph111-bx@violet.berkeley.edu (;;;;7202) writes:
>How 'bout when he "accidentally" tossed through the window a blue card
>he hadn't used yet.  He then raced down endless flights of stairs to
>get to the street to retrieve it.  Along the way he has to go around
>all kinds of weird scenes in the stair well including Larry "Bud"
>Melman asking, "Excuse me, are those `Bugle Boy' jeans?", and then
>laughing maniacally.
From: tsirbasc@ERE.UMontreal.CA (Tsirbas Christos)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: Fav episode!
Date: 9 Sep 92 06:02:19 GMT
Organization: Universite de Montreal

Well, I think that my favourite Dave moment came during the interview with Peter O'Toole.  Letterman was asking O'Toole about working with actors like Richard Burton or on projects such as Lawrence of Arabia.  O'Toole, who was in a state of complete relaxation was answering in monosyllabic words "Good", "Fine", "Nice" and was busy either staring out into space or contemplating his navel.  At one point Dave is asking a Question about something or other.  O'Toole interrupts him: "One of my buttons seems to h




ave fallen off," he says to Dave, pointing at his Blazer, "I was wondering if you could bring me some thread and a needle to sew it back on", or something to that effect, then he goes off into space again until somebody does bring him a needle and thread, at which point he proceeds to sewthe button back on.

I would have to say that this particular instance made for one of my favourite Letterman episodes
I could have had a V-8          
-Socrates' Last words
tsirbasc@brise.ere.umontreal.ca
From: rgm@cory.Berkeley.EDU (Rob Menke)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: Letterman Qoutes
Date: 7 Sep 92 01:28:08 GMT
	<188kqcINNqqf@darkstar.UCSC.EDU>
Organization: TEAM CS -- Making Tomorrow's Mistakes Today!
In-reply-to: unknown@ucscb.UCSC.EDU's message of 4 Sep 92 21:35:08 GMT
X-Disclaimer: Inject liberal smilies until vomiting is induced.

In article <188kqcINNqqf@darkstar.UCSC.EDU> unknown@ucscb.UCSC.EDU
(tuu) criticizes:

   I been hypmotize!

Those who live in glass houses... *sigh*  The line is:

	He'p me!  Somebody, pleez, he'p me!  I be'n hip-mo-tized!
--
"It is a pity that you Autobots die so	|  Robert Menke
 easily... otherwise one might get a	|    rgm@cory.berkeley.edu
 sense of satisfaction..."		|    ...!ucbvax!cory!rgm
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
From: bonacci@ecf.toronto.edu (BONACCI John)
Subject: Re: Gifts to audience members
Organization: University of Toronto, Engineering Computing Facility
Distribution: usa
Date: Fri, 11 Sep 1992 16:45:12 GMT

In article <drice.716167044@ponder> drice@ponder.csci.unt.edu (Keith Rice) writes:
>What are the different types of gifts that Dave has given to audience
>members in the past?  I have a few listed here:
>
>	Fajitas
>	Composters
>	Edible plunger
>	Gallon jars of mayonnaise
>
>What else?
Toast.  For weeks on end a few years back, he had a toaster at his desk
and when some popped up he'd wing em out to the audience.  I don't recall
exactly how anymore, but this was a slam on NBC or GE (maybe cuz it was
one of their toasters?).

Also, weren't their fries once from the tavern that used to be part of the
opening?

--
JB
"M or W?"
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
From: dnadams@nyx.cs.du.edu (Dean Adams)
Subject: Re: Top Ten Lists
Organization: University of Denver, Dept. of Math & Comp. Sci.
Date: Sat, 5 Sep 92 13:27:48 GMT

IK20001@MAINE.MAINE.EDU writes:
 >Dean Adams says:
 >>"carson productions"???   Just who the hell's top ten lists are you
 >>talking about?  Who gives a rats ass about carson productions??  Nobody!
 >>WORLDWIDE PANTS, Inc. is the *only* company that matters.  Besides, that
 >>Carson is so damn old, he probably can't even count to 10 anymore!  :->
 >Um...Dean....  Did you ever...uh...*watch* the credits?

Heh... absolutely!   Very closely sometimes.

 >Carson Productions *owns* Late Night.  

Oh, man!  Just what "credits" have YOU been watching?  Obviously not the 
ones from Late Night!!  You are 100% wrong saying they "*own*" anything,
and that certainly is NOT said anywhere in the credits!

 >They produce it.  
WRONG.  Carson (used) to have a contract with NBC that gave him certain
financial benefits from Late Night, since it followed his show on the
network and utilized 30 minutes of airtime that was previously filled by
Carson Productions.  That in NO way means he "owned" the show, or was in 
any way Dave's "boss".  Mr. bigshot Carson simply had to be "paid off"
for giving us the privilege of a half-hour less of him each night.
Fortunately that particular contractual obligation ran out several 
years ago, and Carson's name no longer "pollutes" Dave's credits. :->

 >Worldwide Pants may have a lot of leverage rights, but they don't own it.
NBC are the ones that ultimately "own" the show.  Carson certainly NEVER did.

 >This is why, if Dave left, he could not take Late Night with David 
 >Letterman with him.  He *and* Worldwide just don't have the rights.
That is more than likely correct...

 >Which wouldn't be a problem for Dave.  
 >He'd probably enjoy building his new show.
It looks like we may be finding out.

-{ DA }-

Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman,alt.sex.bestiality
From: schwae@marcus.its.rpi.edu (Eric A. Schwartz)
Subject: Re: Speaking of animals... (Re: Dave- a ninny among animals...)
Keywords: dave and aniumals...
Organization: Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute, Troy, NY
Date: Wed, 9 Sep 1992 01:01:00 GMT

In article <Bu9pH4.2rr@watdragon.uwaterloo.ca> pjyamamo@watdragon.uwaterloo.ca (Peter Yamamoto) writes:
>Fans can correct me if I am wrong but...
>
>I am not a regular viewer (anymore) but it seems that very often
>when I watch Dave that he uses sexual innuendos/jokes regarding animals.
>
>Last night Dave had on the guy (lead singer) from Spinal Tap and also
>a star on Sessions (a new show this fall). He was desribing a scene
>from the new show in which they depict one of his fantasies.
>
>He was being shy/careful and was slowly describing the scene (him and
>two women). Rough quotation...
>
>[he hasn't mentioned "women" yet though...]
>I'm in bed with two large [pause]... largely [pause]...
>largely endowed [pause]...
>(Dave interrupts) horses?
>
>I also notes that while Dave found this amusing (wide white grin)
>the guest and the audience didn't really seem to react.
>
Must not have been anyone here in the audience.  

>I can't think of any other examples but I know they are there.
>Can any fans contribute any others?
>
I can't think of any off hand, but I do seem to recall there having
ben a few.  

>Does Dave have a "thing" for animals?
>
Would make "stupid pet tricks" pretty interesting if he moves his show
to cable. >-)

E.S.
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
From: bryanh@dseg.ti.com (Bryan Hazel)
Subject: Re: Kelly Robin Wilcoxin (sp?)
Reply-To: bryanh@dseg.ti.com
Organization: Just Me
Date: Tue, 15 Sep 1992 00:52:58 GMT

In article 8828@news2.cis.umn.edu, gjnelson@ee.umn.edu (Grad student Greg Nelson) writes:
>In article <dlcogswe.716435993@vela> dlcogswe@vela.acs.oakland.edu (Dan Cogswell) writes:
>>Are you anal or what?  I saw the WHOLE SHOW and this is the first time
>>I've even thought of Wilcoxson sounding like "cock suck".  He was making
>>stupid pirate imitations and saying her name and it was only mildly
>>funny, but where do you get this impression of Dave torturing Ms.
>>Wilcoxson for an hour?
>>
>Probably from the look on her face as they focused on
>her several times shaking her head at Dave and looking
>quite angry.  I believe she was with her parents and
>they didn't look too happy either.
>>
>
>

Yeah, well, what kind of person - other than beauty queens and convicted felons - goes
around introducing themselves using their full name? Oh my, some too precious debutante
and the proud parents get bugs up their behinds over having a little INNOCENT (not lewd)
fun with a name. The brute - he must have been raised in a barn.
From: gmkoenig@acsu.buffalo.edu (Gerson V Koenig)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: Cams
Date: 10 Sep 92 04:25:24 GMT
Organization: UB

Let us not forget the Cow-cam and its fire extinguisher!

And of the you can't put a mouse on a cow song which recently showed up in
Flaming Carrot Comics.

Gerson Koenig
gmkoenig@acsu.buffalo.edu
From: edc@dna.bchs.uh.edu
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: DAVE!!
Date: 10 Sep 92 18:25:02 GMT
Organization: University of Houston

In article <1992Sep10.002355.940@sinkhole.unf.edu> wdavid@unf6.unf.edu (Bill  
David) writes:
> In article <1992Sep2.041152.28225@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> dnadams@nyx.cs.du.edu  
(Dean Adams) writes:
> >
> >
> >BTW, here are a few shows i'd *really* like to find copies of:
> >  Late Night: 3rd Anniversary Special
> >  Late Night: "Bootleg Show" (10/12/83)
> >  Late Night: Summertime Sunshine Special
> >
> 
> I'd like to find a copy of the Late Night Film Festival. Forget
> what year, but Dave gave money to a bunch of different people and
> let them make a short film. Michael J. Fox's hockey/classical 
> music sketch was hilarious. Somebody (Diane Sawyer?) made 
> a 60-minutes style piece where she dragged a camera crew around
> some town looking for the Late Night Audience.

Yup, really good stuff.  There were actually two film festivals.
Who could ever forget the first one, with the Immortal video
"Dress Cool", by Paul and the *original* World's Most Dangerous
band.  Great song, amazing video.  Just thinking about Paul Schaefer
in a collarless grey suit and a Beatle wig brings a smile to my face!

<ESC>
--
..You either kiss the future or the past goodbye...
                          -- Ringo Starr (written by O'Deherty / Velez)

                                
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
From: jjm3@cunixf.cc.columbia.edu (Jeffrey Joseph Martino)
Subject: Worlds Most Dangerous Band
Reply-To: jjm3@cunixf.cc.columbia.edu (Jeffrey Joseph Martino)
Organization: Columbia University
Distribution: USA
Date: Sun, 6 Sep 1992 05:00:58 GMT

A bunch of us have just about gone nuts trying to remember the original
members of Late Night's band. Who was the drummer before Anton?  What was the 
name of the guy who used to be on guitar (he comes back to visit once in a 
while) Hiram ?Something??  Please help.

Thanks.

Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
From: bonacci@ecf.toronto.edu (BONACCI John)
Subject: More on the contested maturity of LNWDL humor
Organization: University of Toronto, Engineering Computing Facility
Distribution: na
Date: Fri, 11 Sep 1992 19:36:16 GMT

With the recent volleying over the quality/value of Dave's humor, some
good points have been made about its having a multi-layered appeal--
that is, it sounds funny on the surface (in a schleppy, slapstick kind
of way) and it is *really* funny if you know what Dave really has in mind.
This is a good point, and I would agree.

Then there is the axis of time.  Some gags are around for an eternity,
others for a year or so.

IMHO, one of the most appealing aspects of his brand of humor begins
to come out if you manage to watch "the program" consistently over a
short period of time.  It's almost like it is in episodes.  A joke
will hang in the air for a week or two and on Thursday he will pick
up right where he left off on Tuesday.  Doing this violates the status
quo by cutting across rigid scheduling.  It's risky, but it makes the show
seem more intimate.  And the brilliance of it is in the timing Dave 
chooses for reviving one of these airborne issues in an off-hand, 
unexpected way.

This, I believe, explains why it is not always possible for someone to get
a good impression of the program from a single installment (which is also
why this kind of thing is against the status quo).

How 'we doing on time?  Whassat?  Oh, we gotta go.
--
JB
From: wilder@mik.uky.edu (jeff wilder)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: Gifts to audience members
Date: 11 Sep 92 20:11:28 GMT
    <BuFErE.3sp@acsu.buffalo.edu>
Distribution: usa
Organization: University Of Kentucky, Dept. of Math Sciences

Late Night with David Letterman Facial Sponges.  And if you were an
*especially* good little audience member, he'd use it first!

--
================================================================================
| Jeff W   uk06666@ukpr.uky.edu | Meddle not in the affairs of cats, for they  |
| Wilder   & wilder@mik.uky.edu | are subtle, and will piss on your cyberdeck. |
================================================================================
From: sylve_ge@jhunix.hcf.jhu.edu (Gerald Sylvester)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: WHATS WRONG WITH THE SHOW
Date: 10 Sep 92 22:45:22 GMT
Organization: HAC - Johns Hopkins University, Baltimore

In article <1992Sep7.215742.25105@ms.uky.edu> thomasc@ms.uky.edu (Thomas Campbell) writes:
>In article <mcirvin.715913934@husc8> mcirvin@husc8.harvard.edu (Mcirvin) writes:
>>ph111-bx@violet.berkeley.edu (;;;;7202) writes:
>>
>>
>>The music on the Leno Tonight Show, with Branford Marsalis and 
>>company, is far better than Doc's band or Paul's.  That's about
>
>Whoa Whoa Whoa!!!  Now, I'll agree that Marsalis has a ton of talent and for
>Jazz he probably *is* the best.  *But* with Paul you can name any song frrom
>the past 50 years and *bam* he'll play it.  They may not be gods at making
>their own music but, they are pretty good at being versatile and playing
>alot of *different* kinds of music which is what you need on Dave's show.

Paul's album was pathetic.  It sounded as though the record companies saw
the chance and had Paul make a 'commericial' album.  I would bet that
is not the album he would make if he had the chance.  

I personally think that Paul is an excellent band leader.  As far as playing,
he is not great, just very good.  Will Lee is an incredible bass player.
He might not show it there but as a studio musician in NY (and some live),
he is VERY highly respected and has played on probably 400+ albums.  
Sid is also an excellent musician (as has anyone who has played with
Paul Simon).  Anton Fig is not a very good all around musician but
is a good rock drummer.  

Gerald Sylvester
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
From: mperlman@nyx.cs.du.edu (Marshal "Airborne" Perlman)
Subject: Letterman FAQ
Organization: University of Denver, Dept. of Math & Comp. Sci.
Date: Wed, 9 Sep 92 16:38:31 GMT

anyone want to start one? We'll have the Address for Rock Center,
Daves home address <grin>...and misc. FACTS about the man.

(i.e. a way to get more letterman viewers, so we can send jay leno to hell!)

BTW..did anyone see that SNL where it was supposed to be Carsons last show,
and they had they one guy playing leno..hah..it waspretty real.

I KNOW..I have a question, did dave ever say the name of that airline
where they got to go below the flight deck?? Dave is always bitchin' about
TWA...but I ask.."If you hate them..why do you always fly with em'"
--
Marshal Perlman - Huntington Beach - California - USA - Earth - Milky Way 
                 Private Pilot - Airplane Single-Engine Land
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
From: glazer@cs.cornell.edu (Scott Mathew Glazer)
Subject: Re: Film Festivals...
Organization: Cornell Univ. CS Dept, Ithaca NY 14853
Date: Fri, 11 Sep 1992 14:04:59 GMT

In article <1992Sep11.114336.2638@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> dnadams@nyx.cs.du.edu (Dean Adams) writes:
>wdavid@unf6.unf.edu (Bill David) writes:
> >Forget what year, but Dave gave money to a bunch of different people 
> >and let them make a short film. Michael J. Fox's hockey/classical 
> >music sketch was hilarious. Somebody (Diane Sawyer?) made a 60-minutes 
> >style piece where she dragged a camera crew around some town looking 
> >for the Late Night Audience.
>
>That would be the "2nd Annual Holiday Film Festival", from 11/86.
>Here is the full show listing:
>
>  1. "Feelin' in Love",  David Letterman
>  2. "The Iceman Hummeth",  Michael J. Fox
>  3. "An Audience of My Own",  Diane Sawyer
>  4. "My Day With the Stars",  Jonathan Winters
>  5. "You Kill Me" (music video),  Paul Shaffer w/Teri Garr
>  6. "Chris Elliot: A Television Miracle",  w/George Takai (aka Mr. Sulu)
>(that last one was certainly a masterpiece!)
>
>BTW, the "1st" festival wasn't quite so elaborate.  The date was 
>11/30/85, and as far as I know there were only two "films":
>
>  1. "With My Own Eyes", by David Letterman
> and
>  2. "Dress Cool",  a music video from Paul and the band.
>
>Both excellent offerings however!   
>

I know one of these had a really funny film by Michael Keaton.  I think
it was the first?

--Scott G
From: cwwhite@vax2.concordia.ca (Stephen White)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: General Electric, a reason to boycott
Date: 14 Sep 92 05:55:00 GMT
Organization: Concordia University
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41




Just for the record, GE does make major components for nuclear offensive, first
strike nuclear weapons, including the proposed minute man missiles.  For more
information/documentation see the film "In the King of Prussia" starring Martin
Sheen in one of his many cameo appearances.  He performed for free in this
feature film that no one has ever heard of since it is highly revealing, and
could leave no viewer with any feeling other then contempt to General Electric.

I saw the film in a special Peace Studies class almost two years ago, and have
been actively boycotting GE ever since.  I even wrote the CEO to inform them
of my actions and quoted figures from the film as evidence of their neglect,
but never received a response or denial.

Another great film to see is INFACT's "Deadly Deception" that actually won
an oscar this year for best short film or documentary.  Many of you will
remember the acceptance speech and the plea to boycott GE, this film too
exposes many facts about a company with one of the worst records on human
rights, and environmental protection.

There is little doubt in my mind that David Letterman is sincere in his hatred
of GE, and would want all of us to join the renewed call for a freeze on
nuclear technology (in military applications), and to boycott GE or at least
to avoid them where possible.

At the very least, if you are opposed to purely offensive nuclear devices,
then PLEASE I implore you to let your opinions be known, and write a simple
letter to GE saying so.  Get the address off the back of any product, and
send a letter saying something along the lines of: "Hey, I don't think we
need nuclear weapons anymore, and I think that you are too smart to continue
making them, I have been a loyal customer for many years and would hate to
have to bring my buisiness elsewhere, blah blah blah".

Is that honestly too much to ask?????  I'd love to offer to pay for the
postage, but hey it's only a few cents, and you'll take more time flaming this
message it will have taken you to write the letter.  Please do this simple
thing, not for me (hell I'm not getting paid for this, this is a call for
acton from the heart, you think I want to waste my time typing this?  I just
want a better world for all us and all that utopian crap) but for everyone.

Thanks for your time and patience,
                                                                --Stephen White

| "Live simply that others may simply live" --Mohandas K. Gandhi               |
From: ccmei@ada.seas.ucla.edu (Carl C. Mei)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Dave cuts his fingers....
Date: 9 Sep 92 18:26:39 GMT
Distribution: usa
Organization: SEASnet, University of California, Los Angeles

It is almost always for certain that when there's a cooking segment on
the show, we can expect Dave to pretend to cut his finger and go into
this act of hollering in pain.  It's old, it's predictable, but it
NEVER fails to crack me up.

How about a recent show with Wolfgang Puck.  Wolfgang was cooking
crabs, and had some live crabs on the counter.  Dave dropped a couple
on the floor and kicked them, then pretended to have gotten cut by the
claws and hopped on a foot while screaming.  hilarious.  Oh, and that
segment deteriorated into a food fight.  =)

Another Fave Dave....

Carl


Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman