From: eisimps@cie.uoregon.edu (Eileen Simpson)
Subject: The Great American Star Trek Novel, Ch. 6
Summary: Revenge of the Feminist Trekkies
Organization: University of Oregon Campus Information Exchange
Date: Sat, 29 Aug 92 05:07:33 GMT


(Our story continues...)

                      THE GREAT AMERICAN STAR TREK NOVEL
                       "Where No *Man* Has Gone Before"

                                CHAPTER SIX

  "If I can do this," Uhura muttered as she struggled with the 
equipment that now ringed the small workstation, "I can do 
anything.  I mean it, Scotty," she snarled, "if I can get communication 
going between _these_ two groups, I'm gonna go bring peace to 
Northern Ireland."
  "There is peace in Northern Ireland, lass," he said quietly, as he 
helped her wrestle a connector into place.  "But why don't you try 
something a little less touchy.  Like the Captain's relationship with 
certain Klingons?"
  Uhura glared at her friend.
  "The way I feel about our illustrious Captain right now, I would love 
to give him to those Klingons!  With a few suggestions of things they 
might want to do to him--as a personal favor to me!"
  Scotty gave her a small, tired laugh of sympathy.
  "Well, just stay with it, lass.  You do this, and you get to be the new 
miracle worker on the ship.  I've put the title up for grabs," the Scot 
said sadly.
  Uhura's heart ached.  Scotty needed help.  She meant to be sure that 
he got it.
  At long last she was ready--at least as ready as she'd ever be.  She 
called the others over to the station.
  "This is going to be slow," she announced, "and it's going to be 
cumbersome.  I've tied into every memory bank in the main 
computer, and it'll be accessing anything in memory that seems 
even remotely related to any  prior forms of recognizable 
communication it's picked up.  It's not going to produce anything 
close to a precise translation, and I'm probably gonna have to do a lot 
of manual analysis of anything that does come out, but that's the best 
I can do."
  "_And if it works, it'll be a miracle_," she thought testily, as she took 
her place at the computer station she'd established.
  "I'm certain that if it's your best work, it will be enough," Kirk 
offered sincerely.
  "_Lizard_,"  thought Uhura, as she put on her audio monitor.
  There was a moment of uncertainty, as everyone wondered, "Now, 
what?"  What, exactly, did they do to use the system?  Talk? They 
decided to try everything--verbal and nonverbal communication--at 
once.
  "We want to get off this ship, and down on the surface," Kirk 
reminded his party.  "Let's try everyone thinking and feeling about 
that, while I talk to our little friend here."  He indicated the young, 
ever-playful, ever-attentive female.
  The others nodded.  No one had a better idea.  They cleared their 
minds, and thought about being able to leave the ship, of going down 
to the planet's surface, of being together with the aliens on their 
world.  Uhura had a quick conversation with Pavarti.  At her 
suggestion, the two of them concentrated on only the last piece of the 
survival plan--of being together with the aliens.
  Kirk stepped up to the pretty little female who had followed him so 
persistently.  His enormous experience with his persuasive powers 
with women immediately moved into play.  He trusted his technique.  
  He stood before her, and gently took hold of her upper arms.  She 
made a silly-sounding titter in response.  He tried to look deeply and 
soulfully into her eyes--her vacant, unfocused, unnerving eyes. He 
recovered his concentration, and talked impassionedly, from his 
heart.  He gazed compellingly at the beautiful, budding young 
woman, and spoke earnestly of his needs for his ship and crew.
  "We need you," he told her, honestly and dramatically.  He pulled her 
closer.  
  "We need your help," he pleaded, as he held her in his arms.  "We 
need to be able to go with you, be with you."  Kirk spoke to her 
softly, with his feelings completely engaged as he spoke.  As he 
talked to the young woman, she seemed more relaxed.  He had the 
feeling she was being affected by their interaction.  He couldn't help 
but notice her more, himself.  Her physical charms were obvious.
She was so young.  So beautiful.  So close.  
  The sexual energy between them was incredible.
  "_Wow_!,"  Pavarti thought, thoroughly impressed by the rhythms of 
the exchange he was watching.  He was absorbed in his fascination 
with Kirk's sophisticated technique.  He resolved he'd make Captain.  
His mind began to wander.  "_Talk about suave_!," Pavarti noted in 
admiration.  As he watched his Captain handle the lovely girl with 
such a warm, friendly giggle, Pavarti began to consider the 
possibilities of _really_ connecting with these other beings.
  The group of aliens stopped entertaining themselves, and began 
watching the exchange between Kirk and the young female.  They 
showed a playful, friendly curiosity in what was going on.  They 
began to move closer.
  "**Intimate**," came a soft, feminine voice from the computer, so quietly 
that only Uhura could hear.  "**Very intimate**."
  "_My gosh, it's working!_,"  Uhura thought.  She was quickly absorbed 
in handling her equipment.
  Kirk continued to gaze soulfully at the little female in his arms.  She 
became quiet, almost submissively vulnerable, as he held her.
  "We need to be able to be with you," he told her softly.  "We need to 
know what we have to do for that to happen.  Can you tell us?," he 
asked her, gently.
  There was a long silence.  Kirk repeated his request several times, 
varying his voice, staying soft, staying caring.  Being, inevitably, 
seductive.
  "**Intimate.  Very intimate**," the voice said again, quite clearly, in a 
volume everyone could hear.  This time, after a moment, the voice 
continued.  "**Know all...completely...very intimate. Joined...together.  
Come.  Come.**"
  "_What the heck is this?_", Uhura wondered.  "_Where's this coming 
from?_"   She felt confused, then quickly became suspicious.  She 
looked up from her work, and noted the position of the Captain and 
the alien girl.  She checked the body-language of the males in 
Starfleet's group.  Her friends looked a little embarrassed by the 
girl's remarks, but not surprised.  
  "_Great!_," Uhura thought.  "_Welcome to the Starfleet subconscious_."  
  Kirk had suddenly become acutely aware of the other people in the 
room.  He had the feeling he could probably  guess what the little 
lady was trying to tell him.  She needed to know this wasn't the time.  
  He couldn't just ignore her remarks, but what could he say?  What if 
his impressions were wrong?  He tried to read confirmation of his 
suspicion in the look on the girl's face.  It was useless. Her facial 
expression revealed nothing to him--he was stymied by the 
blankness of her eyes.  
  As far as Kirk could tell, she most resembled a foolish, perpetually 
cheerful, somewhat dim, over-active puppy.  
  Kirk decided to pass the buck.
  "What do you make of that, Bones?," he asked crisply.
  McCoy wasn't touching this one at all.  He looked at Uhura and Scotty.  
They weren't going near it either.
  "I'm not sure," the doctor offered hesitantly.  "What do you think, 
Spock?"
  The Vulcan appeared unaffected by the exchange.  He was evaluating 
the reactions of the other aliens in the room.  They were moving 
closer to the humans all the time, in a light-hearted, merry little 
mob.
  "Fascinating."  Spock turned back toward Kirk.  "I believe we have 
been invited to join them.  You have succeeded, Captain."
  The others looked at Spock somewhat dubiously.
  "You think so, Spock?," Kirk asked, uncertainly.  "I don't know, it's 
awfully ambiguous. I just don't feel sure..."
  "You could attempt to clarify the situation nonverbally, Captain,"  
Spock offered.  
  Kirk looked openly skeptical of the suggestion.
  "_I hope to be present for that occasion_,"  McCoy thought.
  Kirk didn't know what to do.  He let go of the girl's arms while he 
thought things over.
  The young alien raised her hands to his face, and gently touched her 
fingers to the hair at the edge of Kirk's temples.  Kirk was startled.  
She laughed softly as he recovered, then moved her fingertips lightly 
along his hairline and the edge of his face.   
  At his sideburns, she encountered the rough, prickly sensations of 
his beard.  It was her turn to be startled.  She laughed in momentary 
surprise, then continued her exploration of his cheeks and chin. She 
seemed delighted.
  Kirk did his best to control his embarrassment, and his reaction to 
her touch.  He didn't know where this was going, but it wasn't painful 
to anything more than his dignity, and he supposed it might actually 
help them get the permission they needed to disembark.  He forced 
himself to focus on the crew's need to evacuate to the surface of the 
planet.
  Her fingertips were brushing his lips.
  "Do you understand what we need?," he asked her quietly, in a 
whisper the others couldn't hear.  All his compassion, hope, and 
concern for his crew were in the simple inquiry.  "Help us," he 
begged her.
  "**Home.   Kamacara.  Suttee.**"
  Uhura began working intensely at the portable computer station, 
running an analysis of the unknown terms.  Kirk waited excitedly for 
her report.  It looked like now they were getting somewhere.
  "It's not immediately clear what's intended by the use of the 
particular words, 'kamacara' and 'suttee', sir," Uhura explained.  
"There are a variety of cultural interpretations and meanings 
suggested when they come up in combination."
  "What do they mean separately, Uhura?," Kirk ordered.
  "'Suttee' is Sanskrit, Captain.  It's a form of the word, 'to be.'  The 
other word is a compound, also from Sanskrit.  It means, 'to move 
through the world at pleasure, or with pleasure.'  The juxtaposition 
can be tricky to interpret.  I need to work on it a little longer."
  Kirk signalled his approval with an inclination of his head.  He 
evaluated the words in his own mind, as the girl's hands tranced the 
lines of his shoulders.
  "Uhura," he asked, "is the 'kama' in that word the same 'kama' as in, 
say, for example, 'kama sutra'?"
  "Yes, Captain.  'Kama' is the term for the ancient Indian pleasure 
principle," Uhura confirmed, then went back to her analysis.
  Kirk raised his eyebrows.  He looked at the little group of aliens.  
They now stood quite close to him.  They were still milling about, 
laughing...and touching.  It appeared to be an easy-going sensuality.  
  And those clothes!  He turned back to the young woman.  She ran her 
fingertips lightly down his arms.
  Kirk smiled.
  "**Intimate.  Joined.  Very intimate. _Us_**."
  Well, Kirk thought, he had never seen any indication that she was 
shy.
  "Captain!," Uhura called joyfully, and with wonder in her voice.  "I 
think Mr. Spock is right!  We've done it!"  Everyone in the room 
turned toward her in relief.  She went on.  "It looks like these two 
words are intended to convey a host of information, but all of it is 
favorable!  The reference to 'home' is obvious.  The other words are 
an invitation: 'to be home, moving through their world at pleasure'!"  
Uhura was ecstatic.  "We did it, sir."
  The humans and aliens joined in a little dance of celebration.
  "There's one thing more, though, Captain."  Uhura came up and stood 
beside Kirk before she went on, a little more discretely.  Her manner 
showed some concern about being overheard, but it was clear it 
wasn't directed towards the aliens.  
  It was with the other Enterprise officers, all of whom were within 
hearing distance of the Captain.  Kirk raised his eyebrows in a sign of 
inquiry, and, in his newly happy mood, gave Uhura a wave that 
clearly said she shouldn't worry about the others, and should just tell 
him whatever else he needed to know.
  "That particular juxtaposition, Captain,  also occurs in communications 
with the Sa'o peoples of Archemedes III.  The presence of the verb 'to be' 
suggests an invitation that is dependent upon establishing a relationship.  
Among the Sa'o, 'To be Kamacara' is to be bond-partnered in a highly 
committed form of state marriage, dedicated to a high degree of intimacy 
and to promoting the exchange of pleasure between two newly acquainted groups. 
In the context of her attention to you, and her other remarks about a 'very 
intimate joining', I think we're being told that such a relationship is 
expected here, between the two of you."  Uhura indicated the Captain 
and the young, alien lady.
  Everyone paused.  Kirk stared at Uhura momentarily, then turned 
away for a long, silent, moment.
  "Now let me get this straight," he began, as he spun back toward her.  
"We can go with them, to their home, down on their world," Uhura 
nodded agreement, "but I need to agree to be in a...very 
intimate...relationship...where I join with her...know her completely...
and promote pleasure.  Is that it, Commander?"
  "Promote pleasure among our peoples," Uhura clarified, as she 
indicated her agreement with the rest of his remarks.
  "Right.  Right."  Kirk acknowledged.  "And I do that, by joining with 
her,"  he gestured toward the little female who had pursued him 
since their first encounter, "very intimately, and knowing her 
completely."  Once again, Uhura agreed.  "And I have to do it,"  Kirk 
emphasized, "or we can't evacuate the crew to the surface."
  "That's how I see it, sir," Uhura  acknowledged.
  Kirk turned away again, and thought some more.  The other human 
males in the room stood gaping in open-mouthed amazement.
  Kirk turned back around.  "I'll do it," he said nobly.
  Spock frowned.  "Are you certain, Captain?  I am aware of the 
delicacy of our situation.  Nevertheless, you should be certain of what 
you are agreeing to do.  Cmdr. Uhura's information is necessarily 
imprecise in regards to the exact content of the relationship you are 
accepting the responsibility to engage in.  I have some familiarity 
with the relationships of the Sa'o encompassed in the concept she is 
describing.  If this relationship is similar to those of the Sa'o, it would 
create extraordinary difficulty for us if you were to contract such a 
relationship and then find yourself unable or unwilling to perform." 
  Kirk recalled some stories about the Sa'o, himself.   
  "I don't think you need to be concerned with my ability to perform, 
Spock," he said confidently.
  Spock frowned again.  "I am simply suggesting that you should 
attempt to clarify the precise expectations of any relationship before 
you agree to engage in it, Captain."  Spock's voice sounded unusually 
stiff.
  The little alien female observed their exchange from where she now 
stood, among her friends.  The others of her group were running 
their fingers lightly over her body and through her hair.  They cooed 
together in easy intimacy.  She reached out and took Kirk's hand.
  "**Joined.  Together.  Fun.  Play.  Come.  Come.**"
  Kirk laughed, a trifle self-consciously.
  "I think you're just going to have to trust my human intuition that I 
know what's called for, Spock."
  Kirk took a last look at the playful little alien, who stood before him, 
holding his hand.
  "I accept," Kirk said simply.

  The little group of aliens seemed remarkably happy, Kirk thought.  
But then, they always seemed remarkably happy, he remembered.  They had 
been happily chirping away when he was desperately trying to save his 
crew, he reminded himself.  Still, Kirk breathed in relief, it seemed to 
have worked out amazingly well.
  Not much had happened since his agreement of 10 minutes before to 
become...what was it?  Kama-something, ah!, bond-partner, to the 
little female who had been pestering him since their first arrival.  
Since then, Kirk had been allowing himself to be cosseted and petted 
by the girl and her companions.  Although it felt sensual, it wasn't 
particularly embarrassing anymore, especially since the touching 
wasn't occurring on any intimate body parts, or in an overtly sexual 
manner.
  It was simply inherently caring and intimate.
  "Oh, well,"  he sighed.  It wasn't the usual behavior a Starfleet 
Captain wanted to engage in in front of his crew, but he was simply 
going to have to learn to cope.  That wasn't an entirely unpleasant 
thought.  The little female might be young, Kirk decided, but she was 
clearly 'of age'.  
  True, she struck him as foolish, not to mention, somewhat vague and 
dim, Kirk mused, but she appeared to have other...compensations...for 
these deficiencies.  If this relationship was at all like the stories he 
had heard about the Sa'o, getting 'very intimately' 'joined' so he could 
'know her completely' would be just the kind of diversion he needed 
while he figured out how he was going to save the ship and get them 
home.
  In fact, the only thing that intruded on his enjoyment of the 
attention he was receiving, and his anticipation of how he would 
'help promote the exchange of pleasure among their peoples', were 
his persistent, intense feelings of determination that he was going to 
use this new relationship so they wouldn't be marooned, forever, 
among these beings.  Kirk was going to discover their secret and find 
a way to save his ship and go home.  He was convinced it was 
possible.  Why not?  Every other 'impossibility' had been overcome.  
Why not this one, too?
  The Starfleet personnel in the original reception group remained at 
their stations, observing the aliens' attention to their Captain.  Kirk 
couldn't help but notice a certain ambivalence and cool reserve in the 
behavior of many of his officers.  You would think they would be 
pleased with their survival and his good fortune, Kirk thought.  He 
took their reactions as vague feelings of jealousy.  It was beneath 
them, Kirk felt.  Especially, Spock.
  Kirk was beginning to tire of the activity with the girl and her 
friends.  True, he hadn't done anything taxing, but they'd been 
touching him for at least 15 minutes, now.  Surely they realized that 
there were other things he needed to do!  The evacuation would be 
an enormous task.  And besides, where were these people going to 
settle his crew?  The experts' assessment of the probable culture of 
beings such as these, indicated it was very unlikely that they had 
any significant experience with or reliance on hierarchies, but Kirk 
still found it hard to believe that this little group could simply plop 
them down on the world below, without so much as a 'by-your-leave' 
to anyone else about it.
  What were they going to say about the Enterprise crew when they 
got down there?  Some sort of nonverbal equivalent of, "Hey, mom!  
Look what I found out in space!  Can I keep 'em?"
  The touching stopped, and the aliens moved away.  Kirk's human 
officers noticed the activity, and revived from their boredom.  They 
waited for the next move.
  The aliens tittered as the little female came forward and stood 
directly in front of Kirk.  She moved closer to him, and gently took 
hold of his upper arms.  She inclined her head slightly, and looked up 
at his face, with a little giggle.  Kirk could swear she was trying to 
gaze into his eyes.
  The feminine voice came softly from the computer.
  "**Kamacara.   Bond-partner.  Intimate.  Now.**"
  Kirk felt nonplussed.  McCoy raised his eyebrows, and shot a quick 
glance at Scotty. _This_ was interesting.
  Kirk hesitated.  The aliens tittered again.  The little female pulled 
him closer, and continued to look up at Kirk with her vague eyes.  
  They were almost touching.  Kirk found himself noticing the intensity 
of their breathing, noticing the way her breasts moved as she 
breathed, noticing her body so close to his.
  The feminine voice from the computer spoke again.  This time, more 
insistently.
  "**Bond-partner.  Intimate. _Us_. Now.**"
  Kirk's human subordinates avoided each others' eyes and looked at 
the floor.  Spock caught Kirk's eyes squarely, with just the slightest 
hint of a dare in the Vulcan's manner.   Kirk had to ignore the 
suggestion of insubordination.   He adopted his most authoritative, 
Starfleet Captain pose.  He did his best to appear casual, and yet in 
command of the situation.  Behind the facade, it was a different 
story.
  "_Here_?,"  he thought.  His eyes furtively surveyed the reception area, 
widening involuntarily as they encountered the area's tiny 
worktable.  "_She can't mean, here_?"
  There was an extended silence.  Kirk's subordinates waited for 
instructions.  By unspoken agreement, no one was going to bail Kirk 
out of this one.  They knew his embarrassment was worse than 
theirs, and in an astonishing and unexpectedly unanimous reaction, 
they were enjoying it.
  "**Bond-partner.  Very Intimate.  Us.  _Now_.**"
  "_Well_,"  Kirk thought, "_apparently, she does mean here_."    How long 
had it been since heUd been "very intimate" on a starship worktable?  
  A _long_ time, he thought--and never in the line of duty.
  And never with an audience.  Some things, Jim Kirk was not into.  He 
couldn't do anything about her  people, but he certainly could do 
something about his.
  "All right," he growled to the Enterprise  contingent, as he stepped 
back from the girl.  "You heard the lady.  Everybody out."  
  Kirk's eyes met Spock's defiantly, in a way that said, "I'm still in 
charge, here."  Spock raised his eyebrows in response.  He turned to 
leave with a sardonic expression on his supposedly poker-face.  The 
human officers avoided Kirk's eyes and each others' as they filed out 
of the room.
  Kirk's posture remained erect and commanding as he watched them 
go.  He was in control, it said.  
  And he was.  When the others had disappeared from view, Kirk 
turned to his bond-partner.  He was ready for whatever they were 
going to do next.  
  Except for that small part of him that was wondering how  he was 
gonna write the report on this one!
  "With lots of details!,"  some other part of him answered.
  The young woman stepped up to him, almost shyly.  Kirk took her 
hand.

  The Enterprise officers moved down the corridors until they were a 
comfortable distance away from the receiving area.  They stood 
together in a group.  Still not talking.  Still not looking at one another.  
Still not knowing what to say.
  McCoy reminded himself that he had patients to check on, and 
moved back up the corridor to have some privacy while he was 
updated on their conditions.  He stopped a discrete distance away 
from the locations of both his fellow officers and the reception area.  
The doctor signalled sick bay on a communicator, then waited while 
they retrieved the information he required and set up a secure 
channel to convey it.
  From his position at a junction with one of the corridors they had just 
travelled, McCoy could easily observe the senior officers he knew so 
well.  Spock seemed to be his usual, possibly deceased, Vulcan self.  
But the others...
  It was the doctor's first conscious awareness that the others were 
very, very annoyed.  Suddenly McCoy realized that he was, too.  
  "What the hell is this about?,"  he asked himself.   He was surprised 
to find that for him, it was about Jim Kirk.  The discovery confused 
him.  It wasn't like Kirk had set this up to happen.  Why should he be 
so angry with Jim?
  A short distance up the corridor from him, McCoy heard Pavel 
Chekov uncharacteristically snap at one of his Security people.  "_Now, 
what in blazes should be eating Chekov?_,"  McCoy wondered.
  Then it hit him: in the course of Chekov's Starfleet career, McCoy 
had personally treated the man for the medical consequences of 
being frozen, fried, tortured, radiated, over-sampled, brain-altered, 
and dropped on his head.  It had made Chekov a natural for a 
position with Starfleet Security, but it had not been an easy career 
for Pavel Illiyich Chekov.
  In a sudden flash of insight, McCoy realized that whatever peace 
Pavel had made with himself around these experiences, had 
undoubtedly come from the knowledge that they had occurred in 
service to the Federation and its peoples, in the course of significant 
crises--sometimes crises of galactic importance.  It was in the line of 
duty.
  McCoy  considered the other senior officers who stood together in the 
little group.  They had all had similar experiences and feelings.  It 
came with the job.
  Then he had it, the source of their unanimous, "unreasonable" anger 
toward Jim Kirk.  
  To the best of McCoy's knowledge, James Tiberious Kirk was the only 
officer in the fleet whose professional crises regularly required that 
he get laid as part of the solution.  It was a distinct discrepancy in 
the quality of Kirk's crisis experiences, and those of the rest of their 
Starfleet careers.  Kirk's officers were fed up with it.
  Flushed with this new awareness, McCoy bitterly recalled what 
usually happened to him in the course of his professional crises.  The 
doctor readily concluded that he would immediately exchange any of 
his experiences for the 'hazards' and possible embarrassment of 
'very intimately' bond-partnering with some lovely, shimmering, 
young thing!  But, of course, he was not going to be able to do that, 
McCoy recognized.  Only _Kirk_ got to take those kinds of risks.  
  "For the sake of the crew, for God's sake!,"  McCoy fumed.
  It wasn't fair!  Why, if Kirk ever had to save the galaxy, he would get 
to use his...
  McCoy noticed a figure signalling him from a junction down the 
corridor that led directly to the reception area.  It was Kirk, waving 
to attract McCoy's attention.  
  "_Whatever he needs, I don't want to hear about it_," McCoy thought.  
The doctor ignored him. 
  Kirk's waves became more vigorous.  "_He doesn't look like he's in 
trouble," McCoy told himself. The doctor pretended to be absorbed in 
working the communicator.  
  The Captain was looking frustrated.  He seemed to be trying to figure 
out a way to shout 'quietly' to get McCoy's attention.
  "Bones!  Bones!" Kirk's harsh whisper floated faintly to the doctor's 
ears.
  Finally, McCoy could no longer credibly pretend that he couldn't tell 
his Captain was trying to get his attention.  He slipped around the 
corner and down to the junction where Kirk waited for him  with impatience, but with obvious relief.
  The Captain looked worried and confused, McCoy noticed as he 
approached, but he didn't look scared.  
  Kirk checked around before he spoke, giving every impression that 
he wanted to make certain they weren't overheard.
  "_What's he worried about_?,"  McCoy wondered.  "_It's not like the 
aliens are gonna understand anything he says when he's away from 
that contraption Uhura's rigged up_."
  McCoy strode unsympathetically up to his Captain.
  "What's the problem?," he asked Kirk briskly.
  Kirk leaned forward cautiously, and whispered his concerns to his 
friend.
  "Bones," Kirk said in bewilderment, "I don't have a clue what I'm 
supposed to be doing with that person!"
  McCoy's face registered surprise, then wicked delight.  To Kirk's 
dismay, a gleeful grin quickly spread across the doctor's face.
  "Another historic occasion!,"  McCoy announced with a cackle.  "But 
don't worry, Jim.  You've come to the right place for help!"

  Kirk quickly, and unamusedly, ordered McCoy to fetch Spock.   
  Watching the Vulcan approach him a few moments later, Kirk had an 
even more intense sensation of embarrassment and nervousness:  
Kirk could tell from his walk that Spock was going to be smug--as 
only a Vulcan can be.
  "Captain," Spock said casually, as he walked up to his old friend, "I 
had not expected to see you so...soon."
  Kirk decided to hide behind the authority of his position. 
  "Yes, well, there seems to be a...communication problem with 
the...young lady, Spock," Kirk said authoritatively.  "I need your help 
to resolve it."
  McCoy grinned lewdly at Spock.  Kirk glared him down until the 
doctor assumed a veneer of propriety.
  "I was under the impression that our communication difficulties 
were readily apparent before you asked us to leave you alone with 
the young lady," Spock mercilessly observed.  "And that you felt you 
had enough information to proceed without our assistance."
  "Yes, perhaps I made an error," Kirk conceded, as he attempted to 
bluff his way through the conversation. "Nevertheless, the...ah, 
response she expects is...unclear to me.  You commented earlier, 
Spock, about your familiarity with Kamacara relationships among the 
Sa'o," Kirk continued quickly.  "I thought you might be able to 
provide some information or some insight that would cut through the 
confusion."
  "If you have questions about the kamacara relationship,Captain, 
Cmdr. Uhura is an acknowledged expert in the field.  I am certain she 
would be pleased to assist you..."
  "I'd rather not involve Uhura," Kirk interrupted.  "I'm sure the three 
of us can resolve this."
  "Indeed?," Spock queried.  "In that event, how would you describe 
your difficulty with your kamacara, Captain?,"  Spock asked 
neutrally.  
  McCoy smirked, and looked toward the ceiling with exaggerated innocence.
  "I'm encountering...an...apparent discrepancy...between what she said 
she wanted and, ah...what...she..." Kirk foundered, and struggled to 
finish the thought before he sank, "...what she expects," he finally 
concluded.
  "And what did she say she wanted, Captain?"
  "Cut it out, you two," Kirk finally barked in irritation.  "You know 
what she said!"
  "Quite so, Captain," Spock agreed calmly.  "However, if I am to help 
decipher the communication block between you, I must know what 
you _heard_."
  Kirk looked annoyed and defensive.  "I heard just what she said:  
that we were going to be very intimate, now, the two of us."
  "Correct," Spock agreed.
  "Well, now she's not--going along with it!," Kirk explained in 
frustration.  "You said you were familiar with the Kamacara 
relationships of the Sa'o, Spock.  I need your help to come up with 
the right--approach."
  "I see."  
  Spock considered Kirk's problem thoughtfully.  His brow furrowed.   
He evaluated Kirk's recent behavior.  He looked at McCoy and 
considered the doctor's recent demeanor and comments, correlating 
all of this with his years of observations of human behavior, and his 
knowledge of both his friends. 
  "May I ask a question, Captain?"
  "Of course."
  Spock appeared to be considering a puzzling possibility he was 
hesitant to voice.
  "Am I to understand, Captain, that you," it was clear Spock included 
McCoy in his remark, "believe this conversation has something to do 
with...sex?"
  Kirk and McCoy both looked at Spock in astonishment that he would 
even need to ask such a question.
  "Of course it has to do with sex!  What do you think we're talking 
about, Spock?" 
  Spock's face registered innocent surprise.
  "I believed we were talking about a relationship similar to those of 
the Sa'o, Captain."
  "That's right, Spock."  Kirk suddenly recalled some of the more exotic 
reports in circulation about the Sa'o, and was struck by a possible 
explanation for his friend's apparent reticence on this subject.  "Look, 
Spock, I didn't mean to embarrass you or offend Vulcan concepts of 
propriety..."
  "I am neither embarrassed nor offended, Captain.  I am simply 
unable to understand why you believe sex is involved in this 
discussion.  You are aware, of course, that it is unusual for kamacara 
relationships to involve sex between the participants?"
  From the look on Kirk's face, McCoy could see that he wasn't.  
  "Ohhhhh my!"  McCoy thought.  A smile slowly spread across the 
doctor's face as he considered the new possibilities this raised.  He 
had the feeling he would like where this was leading.
  "That's...that's not true!," Kirk sputtered.  "Spock, I've heard or read 
literally dozens of stories about the Sa'o and these kamacara 
partnerships.  They make Wrigley's Planet sound like the Ladies 
League convention!  They..."
  "Ah, yes," Spock nodded, interrupting.  "The Woran, the Chrisan, and 
the Loran subcultures.  The only 3 groups among the Sa'o who 
sexualize the kamacara relationship.  I have never understood," 
Spock mused, "why groups representing less than one percent of the 
Sa'o peoples, would receive such disproportionate interest and study 
from Starfleet anthropologists."  
  McCoy was pleased to see Kirk's face showing increasing signs of 
concern.  
  "The Sa'o cultures are truly remarkable and unique," Spock 
continued, with genuine respect, and a tinge of sadness in his voice.  
"It is very unfortunate that the habits of only three groups have so 
dominated the awareness of this culture in the fleet." 
  McCoy watched Kirk work through the shock of what he was hearing.  
Obviously, this was all news to Jim.
  "One percent?," Kirk asked, in stunned disbelief. 
  "Slightly less than that, Captain," Spock corrected.  "The exact 
percentage is 0.84796, based on the statistical data of the last 
planetary census conducted in..." 
  Kirk quickly waved him off.  The Captain shook his head.  "But she 
said...  Spock, she said, the translation said, everyone said this was a 
very intimate relationship!"  Spock appeared momentarily 
confused by Kirk's remarks.  "Intimacy, Spock!  I know you know 
what that means!"
  A light went on in Spock's eyes.
  "Ah!  I see the source of the confusion, Captain.  It is the use of the 
term 'intimate'.  While the word itself is sexually neutral, I believe 
human males tend to place sexual connotations on that word, often 
unjustifiably, do they not, doctor?"
  "They do indeed, Spock," McCoy agreed, shaking his head in mock 
sorrow and disapproval.
  "Knock it off, you two!"  Kirk clearly felt annoyed and aggrieved.  
"Dammit, Spock!  If you knew this wasn't a sexual relationship, why 
the hell didn't you stop everyone from talking about it like it was?," 
Kirk demanded.
  "I was not aware that everyone was talking about this as if it was a 
sexual relationship, Captain.  While I concede that in retrospect much 
of the language used had sexual connotations, it is my experience and 
observation that if one deleted from oneUs vocabulary all words 
humans associate with sex and sexual innuendos, one would be 
unable to speak to a Terran at all," Spock said somewhat huffily.  "In 
any event, it is never logical to assume that the term 'intimacy' 
necessarily involves sexual intimacy, Captain, nor was it logical to 
believe that our ability to find refuge on this world depended upon 
you establishing such a connection with your bond-partner."
  "Well, that must be a relief,"  McCoy observed dryly, "to know that 
the crew probably won't die if you finally strike out with this lady."
  "Unless you have observed some behavior on her part that appears 
to correlate with that of the three cultures we have discussed, 
Captain," Spock offered quickly, before Kirk could do more than 
glower at McCoy.  "You appear to be familiar with the behaviors of 
those cultures.  Is there an apparent correlation based upon your 
recent observations?"
  "I think I can safely conclude that I am not bond-partnered to 
someone representing that less-than-one percent, Spock."  Kirk  went 
straight to the point.  "So what are the rest of them like?  These 
people certainly act highly...well, sensual is how I'd describe it.  
Surely that factors into their expectations for their kamacara, doesn't 
it, Spock?"  
  Kirk's question was part challenge and part plea, McCoy noticed.
  "I believe it is important that I clarify the sexual aspect of kamacara 
relationships among the Sa'o,"  Spock said with some concern.  Kirk 
nodded in resignation and listened carefully, but warily, as Spock 
went on.  
  "Sa'o peoples are typically very affectionate and physically 
demonstrative," Spock explained.  "If you experience them as 
sensual, it is important to remember that they are acting without the 
sexual associations we have for such behavior. In the vast majority 
of cases there is no sex  between the kamacara-partners, Captain..." 
  Kirk was surprised to find himself disappointed:  he was going to be 
spending a lot of time with that young lady.
  "...In some Sa'o cultures," Spock continued, "it is expressly prohibited, 
lest it distract the partners from their essentially ambassadorial 
function of creating meaningful understanding between their two 
peoples, the vast majority of whom will not be sexual partners...
  "_Okay_," Kirk decided.  He purposely ignored McCoy's reaction. "_I can
live with that_."
  "...Sometimes," Spock went on, "the content of the relationship between
the participants is left open, to evolve without preconditions in any
direction they choose..."
  "_That's alright_." Kirk though that possibility actually sounded
promising.  It was not unlike some of the lines he'd used over the years.
  "However, in the overwhelming majority of these relationships, the
kamacara-partners do not become sexually involved, and sex is certainly not
assumed to be part of the kamacara contract, Captain.  In fact," Spock 
continued, "in over ten percent of Sa'o cultures the kamacara relationship 
is understood to include a commitment to lifelong celibacy..."
  "Celibacy!"  Kirk exploded.  "No one said anything about celibacy!," 
Kirk sputtered in horror.
  Spock appeared genuinely perplexed.
  "You did refuse to discuss the implications of the agreement you 
were making before..."
  "I know, I know," Kirk interrupted, indignantly.  "But you should 
have told me, Spock!  Uhura should have told me!"  Anger mingled 
with the shock in Kirk's voice.  "How could you possibly think I 
would agree to a relationship that might contain a condition like 
that?," he demanded.
  "It was clear you intended to save the crew," Spock said simply, "and 
that the kamacara relationship was necessary to achieve that goal.  I 
believed you would accept any conditions that relationship might 
impose, subject only to the constraints of ethics, Captain."
  Kirk cooled off quickly.  He turned away for a moment, then looked 
back at his old friend.
  "You were quite right, Spock."  Kirk turned away again, and was 
silent for a long time.
  Jim looked like he needed to sit down, McCoy noticed--not without 
some sense of satisfaction.  The doctor told himself he should feel 
sorry for his friend, but he couldn't just yet.  It wasn't that he 
wanted Kirk stuck with a commitment to a lifetime of celibacy, Bones 
thought, but he couldn't help feeling it would be nice for Kirk to have 
to worry about the possibility for a while.  Maybe quite a while.   The 
doctor liked that idea a lot.
  McCoy and Spock stood quietly while Kirk absorbed Spock's remarks.
  "So what do I do?," Kirk asked finally, his back still to his friends.  
McCoy looked at Spock uncertainly.
  Kirk turned around and faced them.
  "What do I do?," he repeated.  "I mean it, gentlemen, just what is it 
I'm supposed to do now?"
  "You participate in an intimate relationship, Captain," Spock offered.  
As Kirk stared back at him blankly, Spock attempted to elaborate.  
  "You become intimately acquainted with your partner, and allow her 
to become intimately acquainted with you, with the intention that 
through that exchange, our two peoples will achieve greater 
awareness and understanding."
  Kirk considered Spock's suggestions, then blinked in confusion.
  "This is crazy!," Kirk finally blurted.  "It's impossible!  We're talking 
about a woman whose thinking is completely unfathomable to me, 
whose reality has no relationship to mine whatsoever, who probably 
doesn't want me to get sexual with her--and she expects me to create 
an intimate, whatever-the-hell-that-is, relationship with her?  Under 
those conditions?"  Kirk glared at his friends.  "You tell me how that's 
possible."
  "Sounds like every relationship I've ever had with a woman," McCoy 
shrugged, unsympathetically.  
  "You've proved my point," Kirk countered.  "I don't see how I can 
make this work," he moaned in resignation.
  Spock knitted his brow, then spoke calmly and clearly.  
  "I can assure you both that it has been reliably determined that it is 
possible to have an 'intimate' relationship with a person of another 
species, whose outlook is radically different from one's own."  
  The two humans quickly settled down.  The Vulcan continued.  
  "I can also assure you that the kamacara system of the Sa'o has 
created one of the most peaceful, harmonious, compassionate, and 
intimate cultures in the galaxy.  The Sa'o are a remarkable people, 
and I am personally persuaded that any peoples using a similar 
system would share the best of the Sa'o characteristics, and would be 
worthy of our attention and study even in the absence of a life-
threatening emergency."
  Spock had their full attention.  The Vulcan noted that Kirk, while still 
plainly nervous about his role, was  listening with new interest and--
for the first time since Spock joined him in the reception area--some 
degree of respect for the beings they hoped to join.  
  Spock observed the development with satisfaction.  Kirk was, after 
all, first and foremost, an explorer, a seeker of new things.  And yet, 
Spock knew, Kirk had carried a deep loneliness with him throughout 
his journeys.  If, as they believed, these beings shared attributes 
with the Sa'o, Spock suspected Kirk would ultimately find something 
far more valuable in kamacara than the diversion he'd expected at 
the outset of the relationship.
  "Okay, Spock," Kirk conceded.  "You've convinced me.  Of course it's
not like we have any real alternatives I could consider," Kirk 
muttered.  "But I want you two to come back in there with me--for 
help, Bones, not harassment."
  The three men started back to the receiving area.  Kirk had resolved 
himself.  He was prepared to do his duty, and his best--but just 
outside the entry, a wave of panic swept over the Starfleet veteran.  
Kirk couldn't believe it.  The way he felt, it was like he was a cadet 
all over again!  
  What had he gotten himself into?
  "I can't do it, Bones," Kirk whispered in desperation.  "I won't be able 
to handle it!  It's impossible."
  McCoy took Kirk's arm and steadied him.  "Yes, you can and you will," 
the doctor whispered back.  "It's also been reliably determined that 
it is possible to have an intimate relationship with a person of the 
opposite sex, without being sexually involved...even when the male is 
a human."
  "I knew that!," Kirk insisted defensively.
  The three friends stepped back into the reception area, together.

  The aliens were still entertaining themselves in some unfathomable 
amusement, romping and tumbling about the deck.  It was a relief to 
see that their merrymaking continued, despite whatever had 
transpired between Kirk and the girl.  From the buffoonery of the 
little group, it appeared they still regarded their Enterprise 
adventure as some sort of bizarre picnic.
  "_I always wondered what they meant by the phrase, 'More fun than 
a barrel of monkeys'_,"  McCoy thought.  "_Now I know_."
  As the officers moved toward them, McCoy noticed that Kirk's 
kamacara was slightly to the side of the others and relatively quiet.  
  McCoy smirked.  He'd give anything to know what had happened 
between the girl and Kirk, and what she thought about it, he decided.
The girl turned in their direction as they approached.  The doctor 
studied her demeanor intently.  Was it just his imagination, or was 
she 'eyeing' Jim differently than before?  Maybe with some caution 
and some confusion of her own?
  McCoy snickered.  As long as it didn't kill them, he was going to enjoy 
watching Kirk suffer a few indignities while he figured this woman 
out.
  "_Yes_,"  McCoy thought, as they strode toward the girl, "_a little 
embarrassment would definitely be good for Jim's soul..."
  McCoy halted abruptly, and blinked in astonishment.  Kirk and Spock 
sensed his sudden action, and quickly turned toward their friend.
The doctor stood as if he had taken root, gaping openly at the alien 
girl.  Kirk wheeled about and followed the doctor's gaze back to its 
object.  Kirk was momentarily startled, then guffawed in spite of 
himself and quickly averted his eyes.  He shot a look at Spock and 
shook his head while he chuckled quietly in disbelief.  After a 
moment, Kirk turned back to his kamacara...and smiled.
  The little female had incorporated McCoy's medical scanner into the 
bejeweled net she wore.  There was nothing so awful about that, but 
what McCoy was reacting to--and unable to take his eyes off of--was 
where she'd put it.
  Kirk saw his chance to get even, and seized it.
  "Do you always stare at young women that frankly, doctor?," Kirk 
demanded roughly.
  McCoy snapped out of his reverie and blushed deeply, suddenly 
aware that he had been completely transfixed by the scanner in the 
shapely little alien's gown.
  "I...I...," McCoy began to sputter.  "My scanner..."  His voice trailed off 
in embarrassment.
  Kirk relished the doctor's discomfort.  He was also enormously 
relieved.  It appeared there would be ample embarrassment to go 
around.  The Captain felt better already.
  "If you're concerned about your scanner, doctor, perhaps you'd like 
to retrieve it from the lady?," Kirk challenged him.
  McCoy blushed even more deeply.  Kirk's satisfaction grew, 
particularly when the doctor started to look back towards the girl as 
he began to answer, then rapidly lost his nerve and turned away in 
mortification.
  "Go ahead, doctor," Kirk heckled him again.  He turned toward his 
kamacara, grateful that she had innocently turned the tables on 
McCoy.  He chuckled at her warmly, and directed a final taunt at 
McCoy.
  "I dare ya," Kirk teased.
  Kirk twisted his head toward McCoy to enjoy his reaction more fully.  
As he did, a sound came from the young woman near him.
  "Ahhhh....darrrrr...ahhhh," she said clearly, without the help of the 
translator.
  The Starfleet officers were stunned.
  "Fascinating!," Spock observed in awed tones.  The humans looked at 
the girl and each other in complete amazement.
  "I thought they were non-verbal, Spock," Kirk asked incredulously.
  "Quite so, Captain.  The data was clear on that point."
  "Well, is it reasonable that they would develop this ability so 
quickly?," Kirk inquired.
  Spock shook his head.  
  "These beings are a complete unknown, Captain.  I do not believe 
anyone can accurately estimate what they are and are not capable of, sir.  
However, the translator is a two-way process.  It is possible that its activity 
is stimulating this being's perceptions and creating an awareness or 
interest in linguistic systems. However that is sheer speculation at this 
point, Captain."  
  The young girl smiled vacantly at Kirk.
  "Are you certain it's that significant, Spock," McCoy queried.  "I mean, 
they all make noise all the time.  Their vocal cords are operational.  
Maybe this isn't really anything new."
  Spock rejected the suggestion.
  "These are not random sounds, doctor.  They are an attempt to mimic 
the Captain's last comment to you.  While it is unlikely that she 
associates the sounds with the Captain's meaning, at the time of the birth
of language, each word was the sound-equivalent of an experience, which, in
turn, was consciously connected to an internal or external stimulus. Whether 
she understood his meaning or not, the fact remains that mimicry and the 
repetition of specific sounds is an important step in language development,
furthermore, _she_ probably has a specific association with this sound. The
creative energy required for such a development is enormous." 
  Spock regarded the young woman with great respect.  "This is an 
astonishing being you have encountered, Captain," he said warmly.
  "Ahhhh...darrr...ahhh," the girl said again, this time to Spock.  She
extended her arm and opened her hand to show a small stone resting in her
palm.  She waited while Spock removed the pebble and examined it.
  "Fascinating," Spock repeated as he examined the crystal.  "It appears we
are being offered an exchange for your scanner, Dr. McCoy.  Most likely,
this object was replaced when she placed that item in her gown."
  "Well, at least she's fair..." said McCoy.
  Kirk was impressed--and relieved.  Maybe their conversation was 
going to pick up quickly, he thought, and he'd at least be able to talk 
to her clearly and efficiently.  They still needed to get down to the 
surface, he reminded himself.
  It was time to approach her again on that subject. He decided to 
see how far her linguistic development has progressed.  Kirk remained
friendly but shifted into analytical mode.  
  "I'm sorry about the...confusion in our earlier conversation," he 
offered.  "I didn't understand your customs and...expectations.  I do 
now, and I apologize for my earlier actions," Kirk declared sincerely 
and efficiently.
  The girl stared back at him vacantly.  No sound came from her or the 
translator device.
  Kirk looked at Spock in frustration.
  "What am I doing, Spock?  Why won't she respond?"
  "I have only conjecture at this point, Captain," Spock offered 
hesitantly, "and I would prefer to withhold comment until I have had 
the opportunity to review the log tapes of her earlier exchange with 
us and discuss them with Cmdr. Uhura."
  Kirk spread his hands in frustration.
  "Great!," he sighed.  "What do I do in the meantime to get us down on 
the surface?"  He was suddenly very tired.  The strain of their ordeal 
already weighed on him heavily.  The additional demands of 
completely unfamiliar communication and relationship systems were 
taxing Kirk enormously.  He ran his hand over his face, and looked up 
wearily at his kamacara, as he ordered himself to try to come up 
with some tack that might convey their needs to her.
  Kirk exhaled deeply in exhaustion.
  "**Kamacara.  Us...**"  There was a long pause.  "**_Home_...Us...Now.**"
  "Oh,"  Kirk thought, relieved by this solution of his evacuation 
problem, "_that_ was what she meant before."
  He began preparations to move to the surface.

                   (To be continued....)