From: Albert-Lunde@nwu.edu (Albert Lunde)
Subject: Re: The War Between Us (Long)
Followup-To: soc.bi
Originator: lunde@casbah.acns.nwu.edu
Reply-To: Albert-Lunde@nwu.edu (Albert Lunde)
Organization: Ministry of Silly Walks
Date: Mon, 27 Jul 1992 00:40:04 GMT

(Long post on feelings re bi and homo communities not quoted)

I think your feelings are understandable and I want to support you. At
the same time I am going to continue to claim membership in both the
gay and bisexual communities. I want you to understand that I do not
think less of you because you do not identify with the gay/lesbian
communities.

I've spent too many years of my life connected to the gay and lesbian
communities to be willing to let some short-sighted biphobes run me
off. At the same time, I don't accept everything uncritically -- I
use my judgement and seek out the things and places that support me
and try to let the rest go.

It seems important to remember that for all we talk of communities,
gays, lesbian and bi men and women are not monolithic.  I've seen
both biphobia and support from gays, lesbians (and heterosexuals).
The gay/lesbian communities were built by bisexuals as well as others
and we have a right to continue to participate in it.

At the same time, some people and some institutions in these communities
perpetuate biphobia -- I can see why someone with less history in common
would be put off -- and I think some acts ought to be cleaned up.

Steve D. in particular seems to be so focused on his own anger
and oppression that he has very little empathy for anyone else.  
(I conclude this from things like his continuing to argue for the
term "breeder" in the face of very well-reasoned arguments that
it insults gay, lesbian and bisexual parents, whether he means it to 
or not.)  I won't simply call him a thoughtless idiot -- because I 
agree with some of what he says on other topics and I think I 
understand his anger better than he understands mine.  But we part 
company on a number of issues.  I agree with Iseult that his 
cross-posting from soc.motss about bis and their partners was a 
gratutitous display of his biphobia.

[And I've deleted soc.motss from the newsgroups line because
I have no particular interest in conducting a cross-posted flame 
war about Steve (or biphobia).  I am saying the above for your benefit, 
not his. There are some viewpoints he seems unwilling or unable 
to listen to.]

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

In my position, I am prone to ask the question how can I help build a
bi community that is allied with the gay and lesbian communities 
and with feminism at the same time is open to the experience of all 
bisexuals regardless of whether they have experience with or identify
with the gay or lesbian community?

I am going to keep trying to make the gay/lesbian community participate
in a broad, inclusive movement for liberation -- not narrow itself
to exclusive monosexuals.

I'm also trying to educate straights about bisexuality -- I have found
friends and allies among heterosexuals as well.

In working for bi community it seems important that I avoid generalizations.
I need to keep listening to the stories of other bisexuals and trying to
fit them all together. 

We may need to do more to provide ways for bisexuals to come out as bi
directly, without being restricted by models of coming-out that were
developed with gay men or lesbians in mind.

I want to make it clear that while I am allied to the gay community and
lesbian-feminism in their better forms, I am also in favor of a bisexual
community which reaches out to all bisexuals and has a world-view
broad enough to encompass us all. 
-- 
 Albert Lunde         | Interfaith  |     *Y*Y*      "A branch on the
 Albert-Lunde@nwu.edu |  Bisexual   |      *Y*        tree of life"
 alunde@nuacvm.bitnet |  Feminist   |.......|.........................
Newsgroups: soc.bi