From: seeta@hub.eng.wayne.edu (Seetamraju Uday Bhaskar Sarma)
Newsgroups: soc.culture.indian
Subject: .... 60.min/dowry....
Date: 26 Jan 1993 13:04:11 -0600
Organization: UTexas Mail-to-News Gateway
NNTP-Posting-Host: cs.utexas.edu

This is in response to an excellent post by Mr. A.A. Siddiqui's post on India - D, and my
response follows it :-

-+>  Date: 24 Jan 1993 21:56:53 -0400 (EDT)
-+>  From: "A.A. SIDDIQUI" <siddiqui@uwovax.uwo.ca>
-+>  Subject: 60 Min./Dowry Story
-+>  
-+>  Just finished watching a 60 minutes (CBS) story on dowry related deaths
-+>  in India.  Well! to put it bluntly, I felt disgusted and thought that
-+>  perhaps our preoccupation with religious, regional, linguistic and
-+>  political conflicts is to be blamed for not even talking about this
-+>  social evil on the newsgroup.  Wouldn't it be wiser if we discuss this
-+>  outrageous practice and educate people on this subject instead of
-+>  undermining each others religions.
-+>  
-+>  Mahatma Gandhi once said that,"any man who makes dowry a condition
-+>  for marriage discredits his education and his country and dishonours
-+>  womanhood.  Young man who soil their fingers with such ill-gotten
-+>  greed should be excommunicated from society".  Although many Indians
-+>  concede that dowry is an awful custom because it can lead to
-+>  impoverishment, indignity and in too many cases to violence, anguish,
-+>  grief and murder it still continues to flourish unchecked. Why? In my
-+>  opinion, primarily because it has been an integral component of our
-+>  social and religious heritage for centuries.  Bigger dowry means
-+>  family pride and higher social position.  This tradition is unlikely
-+>  to change in the near future because a large number of people want
-+>  to preserve it or can envision no way out of it.  But we the educated
-+>  and perhaps civilized bunch should do something about it.  May be refuse
-+>  to accept and give dowry?  How about a full page advert in Indian Express
-+>  or Hindustan Times deploring this practice?
-+>  
-+>  Sincerely,
-+>  Dr. Afzal A. Siddiqui

The Dowry problem will only get worse in india, for the simple
reason that materialistic ambitions are rising faster than anything
else, even inflation.   15 Yrs ago, a standard dowry demand was for
about 40 thousand.  Now that is the minimum, with the standard
going up to atleast 75,000 with a scooter and ```basic''' family
necessities like golden watch, fridge, color TV etc...

Ever added all these up?  Can U see the list now include a VCR
and a good stereo system, and soon, it might even include a flat
(which is common among the upper middle class).

Materialistic ambitions in collusion with decreasing chances of
a person ``making it'', purely thru hard work and intelligence
are the single biggest reason, that people are taking the easy way out
for a nice life.

Dowry and Dowry deaths are not related.  In any category U pick, U
will always find fringe elements.  The dowry killers are the fringe
elements of the dowry problem.  Using them as the sample space
will only mean, U are grasping the problem at the wrong end.

The normal man wants dowry because in today's VERY-TOUGH-
to-SURVIVE materialistic world of increasing competition, its
the easiest way to a happy life.  I actually see no difference between the
american credit card life and the indian dowry-funded lifestyles.

The american ``charges it'' and works to pay it off later.  The indian
``gets it from in-laws'' and then works to accumulate an amount for
the next generation (his daughters)...  Every one has a cushy life exactly when
they are capable of enjoying the most -- their youth/early married life.

A feasible eceonomic system I should say.  And always, U will find
a few Ivan Boesky's who will misuse it.   But a major difference lies in that
stock market fringe elements like Sri. Boesky, didnt kill anyone.  But our
fringe elements are....
Concluding ::-  Either, we abolish materialism in india, or we shut up.

Seetamraju Udaya Bhaskar Sarma (email : seetam @ ece7 . eng . wayne . edu)
Newsgroups: soc.culture.indian,alt.culture.kerala