From: blum@medici.ils.nwu.edu (Dan Blum)
Subject: Re: And now for a complete change of mood.
Reply-To: blum@ils.nwu.edu
Organization: The Institute for the Learning Sciences
X-Newsreader: TIN [version 1.1 PL8]
Date: Wed, 16 Dec 1992 08:20:37 GMT

Daniel P Johnson (djohnson@cayenne.gac.edu) wrote:
> In article <Bz4p0u.6sC@mentor.cc.purdue.edu> jester@sage.cc.purdue.edu (Jester) retorts:
> .Jeremy_Reimer@mindlink.bc.ca (Jeremy Reimer) rages:

> .>Jester, you have no hope in hell of coming close to the great masters.  Dead
> .>fish (named or unnamed) provide wittier and more humorous discourse than you
> .>could even DREAM of.

> .apparently i have a critic.........everyone else loves me...
> .gee...get a clue....

> Especially *me*, Jester Darling!  [Dan bats his eyes].  However, I
> have to agree with Mr. Reimer on the second point.  I have spent many
> long months communing with spoiled herring, rotten salmon, and putrid
> carp, and after several weeks, you begin to hear their voices...At
> first, you just become *aware*, but soon..oh, soon you can *hear*
> their *words*!  They talk of dark deeds at first, but soon they talk
> of wonderful things!  Thompson the Carp..dear God, he spoke of burning
> flesh, yes!  Burning Flesh and SCREAMS!  YES YES YES!  He told me a
> THOUSAND ways to KILL!!!  God!  Yes!  And rending limbs!  Oh God, YES!
> And then there was Philip... the Trout.  He had decayed into an oozing
> green mass by the time I heard *his* voice, but it was the most
> wonderful of all!  He told me of the Master, who would create
> unbelieveable pain for EVERYONE!  He told me of the TORTURES...the
> FLAMES, the TEETH, the UNIMAGINABLE AGONY OF...OOO!! YES YES YES!!!
> ARG!!  MOMMY!!!

> .>Why not do something more productive with your time, which you seem to have
> .>so much of, by coming up with a FAQ for the group?

> .why for?? there are not any questions other than...

> .send me the script...send me the script....

> I think we should have an ORQS list...Oft Repeated
> Questions/Statements... Then we could have the "Does anyone have the
> words for the Philosophers Song?" questions, and the "God Dammit!  You
> ain't funny!  I wanna talk about REAL Monty Python!  [Whhaaaaa!!!!]"
> and "Duh, you isn't funny.  I'm Joe, and I am funnier than you.  I'm
> so funny!  Watch me tell a joke "There's a d(sometimes *)k*, a n*gg*r,
> and a G*d D*mn F*ck*ng C*mm** B*st*rd* and a G**d R*d Bl**d*d
> *m*r*c*n.  They walk into a bar, and the American kick's their f*ck*ng
> *ss*s!  Ho ho!" [Ok, so you've never seen a post like that last one...
> *n**r* **f*!]

We've already got a FAQL... here's question number whatever while I'm
at it:

Question #Duh?: ARE you a gynaecologist?

Can't imagine why this doesn't come up more often...
> .besides i maintain 2 FAQS for other groups already.....

> .>"Improvise" my ass.  I'll tell you what gets old, it's you coming up with YET
> .>another ripoff of Four Yorkshiremen, among other inanities...
> .well then don't read the group....i sure am not pressuring you
> .to read my so called 'drivel'

> Better yet, [extremely hostile suggestion omitted for the weak hearted]

> .Jester aka piss off!

> Dan aka Yeah!  What he said! [Dan exudes hostility all over your clean
> white shirtfront]

Tool of Satan aka I tried to have Reimer bumped off but you wouldn't
believe what hitmen are charging these days... I'll just see that he's
sentenced to the Fifth Circle, with a good view of the cricket
pitch... that'll teach him a lesson he'll not soon forget