From: alizard@pil
Newsgroups: alt.pagan
Subject: that Real Old Time Religion (1 of 4)
Date: Fri, 25 Dec 92 01:19:35 PST

Someone posted this on a non-Usenet pagan sub I moderate... enjoy...
and a happy solstice to us all...
37/51        [2] Networked  Wicca
Title:       1 ROTR
Date:        12-12-92 11:49
Origin:      Illusions (Arizona) [602-395-1152]
From:        The Bard #34 @16205 WWIVLink


                             *

                   THE REAL OLD TIME RELIGION
                   tune: "Old Time Religion"

       (Chorus): Give me that real old time religion (3X)
                 It's good enough for me!

We will have a mighty orgy        We will sacrifice to Yuggoth
in the honour of Astarte          we will sacrifice to Yuggoth
it'll be a mighty party           Burn a candle for Yog-Soggoth
and it's good enough for me!      and the Goat With a Thousand Young!

We will all be saved by Mithras       If your rising sign is Aries
We will all be saved by Mithras       You'll be taken by the Fairies
slay the Bull and play the zithras    Meet the Buddah in Benares
on that Resurrection Day!             where he'll hit you with a pie!

I hear Valkyries a-comin                There are people into Voodoo
In the air their song is comin          there are people into Voodoo
They forgot the words! They're hummin!  I know I do, I hope you do!
But they're good enough for me!         and it's good enough for me!

We will venerate Bubastis             We will read from the Kabahlah
We will venerate Bubastis             We will read from the Kabahlah
If you want in, then just ast us!     It won't get us to Valhalla
'cause that's good enough for me!     But it's good enough for me!

We will all bow down to Enlil       There are some who practice Shinto
We will all bow down to Enlil       there are some who practice Shinto
Pass your Cup and get a refill!     there's no telling what WE'RE into!
With bold Gilgamesh the Brave!      but that's good enough for me!

We will all see Aphrodite               We will all sing Hare Krishna
Though she's pretty wild and flighty    We will all sing Hare Krishna
She will meet us in her nightie         It's not mentioned in the Mishna
And she's good enough for me!           But it's good enough for me!

It was good enough for Loki         We will all go to Nirvana
It was good enough for Loki         We will all go to Nirvana
He thinks Thor's a little hokey     Make a left turn at Urbana
and that's good enough for me!      And you'll see the Promised Land!

Here's to those who copy Conan    There will be a lot of lovin
Here's to those who copy Conan    when we're meetin in our Coven
They're just Followers of Onan    Quit yer pushin and yer shovin
and that's good enough for me!    So there's room enough for me!

We will have a mighty Party           It was good enough for Sappho
In the honor of Astarte               With her lady on her lap-o
Grab your chiton - don't be tardy     She put Lesbos on the map-o
'Cause she's good enough for me!      With her pagan poetry!

Shall we sing a verse for Venus,    Well the Christians all are humming
Of the Gods she is the meanest,     Cause they say their God is coming,
Cause she bit me on my...elbow      Our God came three times this evening
And it's good enough for me.        And that's good enough for me.

   "That Real Old-Time Religion" (Extra verses)

We will worship like the Druids,      Some guys have a circumcision
Drinking strange fermented fluids,    On account of their religion,
Running naked through the woo-ids,    An embarrassing incision
Coz that's good enough for me.        Cut just ENOUGH from me!

We will sing a verse for Loki       It was good for old Jehovah
He's the old Norse god of Chaos     He had a son who was a nova!
Which is why this verse don't       Hey there, Mithras! Move on ova'!
       rhyme or scan or nothin'     Another resurrection Day!
But it's good enough for me...

It was good for Thor and Odin       It could be that you're a Parsi
It was good for Thor and Odin       It could be that you're a Parsi
Grab an axe and get your woad on!   Don't need a ticket; you get in free
and it's good enough for me!        And that's good enough for me!

Azahoth is in his Chaos         Just like Carlos Castenada
Azahoth is in his Chaos         Just like Carlos Castenada
Now if only he don't sway us    It'll get you sooner or later
That is good enough for me!     And that's good enough for me!

If you think that you'll be sav-ed   Jerry Falwell thinks he's sav-ed
If you think that you'll be sav-ed   In a lamb's blood he's been lav-ed
If you follow Mogen David            And HE thinks that I'M deprav-ed
Then that's good enough for me!      But that's good enough for me...

We will sing to Lady Isis           We will all bow down to Dagon
She'll stand by us in a crisis      We will all bow down to Dagon
And She hasn't raised Her prices    He still votes for Ronald Reagan
And She's good enough for me!       And that's good enough for me!

There are those who, when they've got e-
Normous problems that are knotty
They just take them to Hecate         Thanks to great Quetzacoatl
And that's good enough for me!        And his sacred axolotl
                                      And his gift of chocolatl
Was a time, so I've heard tell, a     And please pass some down to me!
Fine and promising young fella
Gave his all to serve Cybele
But that's damn well not for me!

Well, she raised an awful flurry      When old Gerald got it goin'
When she made the scholars worry      When old Gerald got it goin'
Thank the Gods for Margaret Murray!   All that hidin' turned to showin'
She is good enough for me!            And that's good enough for me!

We'll sing praises to Apollo          When we all bowed down to Nuit
Where the Sun-God leads, I'll follow  There was really nothin' to it
From Ionia to Gaul-o                  (Alex Sanders made me do it...)
And that's good enough for me!        But that's good enough for me!

Let us sing the praise of Horus    We went off to worship Venus
As our fathers did before us       By the Gods! You should have seen us!
We're the New Egyptian Chorus      Now the Clinic has to screen us...
And we sing in harmony!            But that's good enough for me!


  "That Real Old Time Religion:" Extra Verses

It was good enough for Granny        It's not good enough for Reagan
She could throw a double-whammy      It's not good enough for Reagan
That would knock you on your fanny   He's too square to be a Pagan!
And she's good enough for me!        And that's good enough for me!

We will gather at our saunas       Meeting at the Witching Hour
When the spirit comes upon us      By the Bud, and Branch and Flower
To perform the Rites of Faunus     Folks are raising up the Power
And that's good enough for me!     And that's where I want to be!

We will worship mighty Cthulhu     In the sky I hear a hummin'
H. P. Lovecraft's big old hoodoo   It's the UFO's a-comin'
(1930's fiction voodoo....)        That's not banjos that they're strummin'
But that's good enough for me!     But it's good enough for me!

Oh the Phillistines abound          Oh we all will follow Buddah
Oh the Phillistines abound          Oh we all will follow Buddah
They had the biggest Baals around   And we'll eat no food but Gouda
And that's good enough for me!      Which is Gouda-nuff for me

Oh, our Spirits will awaken      We'll sing praises to Apollo;
Oh, our Spirits will awaken      Where the Sun God leads we'll follow
Watch the Universe a-quakin'     ('Though his head's a little hollow) -
Which is Gurdijeff to me!        He's good enough for me!

Let us raise a toast to Bacchus,      We will worship Great Cthulhu,
We will raise a royal ruckus,         We will worship Great Cthulhu,
Then we'll lay us down and f**k us    And we'll feed him Mr. Sulu
That's good enough for me.            'Cause that's good enough for me!

It was good enough for Buddha,      We all worshipped Dionysus
As a god he's kinda cute-a,         'Till we ran into a crisis -
And he comes in brass or pewta'     The bar had raised its prices;
So he's good enough for me!         That's not good enough for me.

Uncle Crowley was a dreamer         We will go and sing "Hosanna"
At the Abbey of Thelemer            To our good ol' pal, Gautama,
But his magic is a screamer,        He will never flim or flam ya',
So it's good enough for me.         And that's good enough for me!

Oh we'll all be Fundamental       When the clouds they are a'rumbling
And be Holy Testamental           And the thunder is a'grumbling,
And never Trancendental           Then it's Crowley that you're mumbling,
And that's good enough for me!    And it's good enough for me!

There are some that call it folly     Shall we sing a verse for Thor,
When we worship Mother Kali.          Though he leaves the maidens sore?
She may not be very jolly             They always come back for more,
But she's good enough for me.         So he's good enough for me!

Shall we sing in praise of Loki,      It was good enough for Odin
Though he left poor Midgard smokey?   Though the tremblin' got forbodin'
Oh, his sense of humor's hokey,       Then the giants finally strode in,
But he's good enough for me.          But it's good enough for me.


  "That Real Old-Time Religion:" Extra Verses

Montezuma liked to start out             There's that lusty old Priapus
Rites by carrying a part out             He's just itching to unwrap us.
That would really tear your heart out,   (He'd do more to us than tap us
But it's good enough for me!             And that's good enough for me!)

We will all bow down to Allah     Where's the gong gone? I can't find it
For he gave his loyal follow      I think Northwoods is behind it!
Ers the mighty petro-dollah       For they've always been cymbal-minded
And that's good enough for me!    And they're good enough for me!

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