HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: z1dan@exnet.iastate.edu (Dan Sorenson)
Subject: Re: Nipple debate (was: Boss Peeve)
Reply-To: z1dan@exnet.iastate.edu (Dan Sorenson)
Organization: McOlsen's Lutefisk Burgers -- one served.
Date: Tue, 15 Sep 1992 23:36:19 GMT

booter@Autodesk.COM (Elaine Richards) writes:
> z1dan@exnet.iastate.edu (Dan Sorenson) writes:

>>	Congrats and all that -- you are Peevetowns official Ear-Warmer,
>>just as soon as the Immigration and Employment officers get done with
>>the paperwork.  You know how slow beurocracies can be sometimes...
>
>Hm, I veto that. Just because a woman has large breasts does not mean
>she is willing to share them.

	Alright, I admit I was hasty in my announcement.  I blame it
on a lack of motorcycling this summer, leaving in a state of withdrawl
for all that is Right with the world.

	Besides, it's not like the *has* to use her breasts to warm
somebody's ears.  This is Peevetown, where thermite is readily found.


>As HR Droid, I nominate the lady as Peevetown Auto Garage Calendar Girl.

	A fine choice, suitable for showing in garages and on better
toolboxes around town.  Might I suggest a matching Tall and/or Heavily
Bedecked With Guns Ships calendar for the bank to give away?

>As I get to know her, I will ascertain exactly what she does in those
>photos. For now, she is in a red sequinned gown and reclines on a car.
>I will ascertain whether the car is a Lotus or a VW Bug in the future.

	What?  No Cobra?  No Viper?  No early MG's?  The mechanics will
riot and leave condoms in your car if you try that sort of auto.


--
<Dan Sorenson, DoD #1066 |"I see angels on Ariels in leather and>
<z1dan@exnet.iastate.edu | chrome, Swooping down from heaven to >
<viking@iastate.edu      | carry me home."   ---    R. Thompson >
<ISU thinks I need more education, which they provide for a fee.>
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: t88swa@tdb.uu.se (Sven Wallman)
Subject: Re: Parents who subject their kids to strange names (and watches)
Organization: Dept. of Scientific Computing, Uppsala Univ.
Date: Mon, 7 Sep 1992 12:43:55 GMT

egpv29@castle.ed.ac.uk (JHenderson) writes:
: Hah! Another sucker!! If the Soviets had had a tank for every "tank
: officer's watch" I've seen for sale, they'd have had their lunch in
: the Oval Office!

a sex change operation only costs app. 150 dollars in Russia.
peeve: it costs about 45 dollars to get a haircut in Sweden.
--
Sven Wallman, S:t Larsg. 5, 753 11 Uppsala, Sweden, +46 1812 9237
"I think, therefore I'm right."-Hugo Rune
From: tjc@castle.ed.ac.uk (A J Cunningham)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Byte me
Date: 10 Sep 92 11:17:30 GMT
Organization: Edinburgh University Colouring Book Software

rickg@netcom.com (Rick Gordon) writes:

>Peeve: Byte magazine has degenerated still further.  

I would hardly have thought it possible. I stopped buying it when they
stopped printing the source code.

>I pulled out seven "return" cards, some as big as an entire page, before
>giving up.  You know, the things that make it impossible to riffle
>through the magazine, but they're sewn into the spine (or glued or
>pasted) rather than blown in so ripping each one out is a pain.

I *really* hate those things. Thankfully useful magazines (MacTutor, The
Economist, Playboy etc) don't have them and I can flick through them. 

I think a campaign to send back the cards to the people who inserted
them with a message scrawled across the back (e.g. "Get this fucking
crap out of my magazine") would soon convince advertisers that they were
a waste of money and ultimately counter-productive.
T


-- 
Tony Cunningham, Insignia Solutions. 				   tjc@ed.ac.uk

Yes, I carry a grudge. If someone pokes me in the eye, I'll poke both of
their eyes. larry@psl.nmsu.edu (Larry Cunningham)
From: mark.lewis@madness.network23.com (Mark Lewis) 
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: RE: OWN PRIVATE IDAHO
Date: 13 Sep 92 19:45:00 GMT
Distribution: world
Organization: Terminal Madness BBS - Newport, RI - 401-848-9069
Reply-To: mark.lewis@madness.network23.com (Mark Lewis) 

-> |> peeve: you get your hair cut over the weekend (3 inches off) and
-> monday |> morning somebody greets you with "my, your hair's getting
-> long".
-> Peeve: Shave your beard off and someone will inevitably walk up to
-> you and say "Did you get a haircut?".

Or when someone askes you, "did you get a haircut?" simply respond with,
"no, I just had my ears lowered!"
             
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: z1dan@exnet.iastate.edu (Dan Sorenson)
Subject: Re: Massachusetts (was Re: Boss Peeve)
Reply-To: z1dan@exnet.iastate.edu (Dan Sorenson)
Organization: McOlsen's Lutefisk Burgers -- one served.
Date: Mon, 14 Sep 1992 22:59:59 GMT

yarvin-norman@CS.YALE.EDU (Norman Yarvin) writes:
>z1dan@exnet.iastate.edu (Dan Sorenson) writes:

>>>The USS Massachusetts.
>>
>>	Never heard of it.  Does it have sails, or at least guns?
>
>Nine 16 inch guns in three turrets, 20 five-inch guns in ten turrets, and
>uncounted numbers of 40mm antiaircraft emplacements.

	The USS Massachusetts is an *Iowa* class battleship?  Hmmmm....
Iowa, New Jersey, Wisconsin, ????  Yeah, I suppose it could be one, but
I had thought it was Missouri.

	Peeve: not remembering the names of the Iowa-class battleships,
which are obviously the most nifty, keen-O, graceful, and indestructable
ships to have ever graces the seas of this planet.  Hell, I'm not even
sure of Wisconsin being an Iowa-class now that I think about it.  I'll
have to unearth my copy of Jane's and do appropriate pennance.  I think
an hour of Firepower ought to atone for this sin.

	Say, isn't the Mass. still mothballed?

	MegaPeeve: They're retiring, again, the Iowa-class battleships.
Complete and utter bullshit, but that's the Navy Way (tm).


--
<Dan Sorenson, DoD #1066 |"I see angels on Ariels in leather and>
<z1dan@exnet.iastate.edu | chrome, Swooping down from heaven to >
<viking@iastate.edu      | carry me home."   ---    R. Thompson >
<ISU thinks I need more education, which they provide for a fee.>
From: padutton@banzai.WPI.EDU (Peter Alan Dutton)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Boss Peeve
Date: 14 Sep 1992 16:03:58 GMT
Organization: Worcester Polytechnic Institute
NNTP-Posting-Host: banzai.wpi.edu

In article <92Sep14.140240.31202@acs.ucalgary.ca> parr@acs.ucalgary.ca (Charles Parr) writes:
>In article <18tar1INNiu2@bigboote.WPI.EDU> padutton@wpi.WPI.EDU (Peter Alan Dutton) writes:
>
>>Peeve: When my girlfriend visits, she invariably turns up the heat in
>>my apartment to about 90 degrees and gets pretty cranky when I turn it
>>down.
>
>      A couple of words of advice, since you seem to need them
>      (a) Do not annoy her

What fun would that be?

>      (b) If you were to have a "furnace problem", you could then
>          break out the blankets for some Comfy Couch Cuddling.
>          Such behaviour *could* get you laid. Yes, even you.

Well, when it's too hot, *I* get cranky. Of course, the person who is too
hot always loses these arguments. It is much easier to put on another
sweater or cuddle up with someone to get warmer than it is to do 
anything to get cooler.

Oh, sure, I'll turn the heat down and she'll immediately go for the 
megablankets, and then she'll want to cuddle, but once I get up to
cook dinner or go to the bathroom, she'll run to the thermostat AND
keep all the blankets on AND expect me to get back under the blankets.

OK, so it's not all that bad, you say. But I still have a right to
complain that I'm hot. The girlfriend part is just incidental.

And I don't have a furnace in my apartment. To wit:

>>Peeve: Electric heat. Especially here in Massachusetts. When she shows
>>up, my electric bill runs about twice as expensive as normal ("normal"
>>being much too high as it is)

>      Well, they say prostitutes are *cheaper* in the long run
>      so maybe you ought to do a balance sheet on the problem?

Ah, they'd probably run up my electric bill as well.

>      Sheesh!

Hey, I have a girlfriend for more than sex, you know. Is it too much
to expect a comfortable ambient temperature at times? Maybe I like
EVERYTHING ELSE about her. That's not too bad, is it?

>>But I digress. As for me, I'm much too hot right now. But my nipples
>>don't do anything interesting anyway.
>
>      Oh now, Peter! You know that just isn't so! You have the
>      cutest little titties! 

**blush** Oh, Charles! (sound of batting eyelids)

>      Oops, sorry Peter, guess it's out of the closet now, huh?

So are all my blankets.

>Regards, Charles

Irregards, Peter!

Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: parr@acs.ucalgary.ca (Charles Parr)
Subject: Re: Boss Peeve
Date: Tue, 15 Sep 92 14:41:11 GMT
Organization: The University of Calgary, Alberta

In article <1992Sep14.201421.18902@umbc3.umbc.edu> potler@umbc4.umbc.edu (Laura Potler (GSFC)) writes:
>In article <92Sep14.173003.30998@acs.ucalgary.ca> parr@acs.ucalgary.ca (Charles Parr) writes:
>>        *your* clothes. As a peevster, you are expected to have
>>        the muscular physique and engorged ManTool(tm) of a
>>        Young.God.at.the.Dawn.of.the.World(tm), which should then
>>        make you irresistable. 
>
>says who? nobody mentioned this to me when i moved to town.  
>
>-l "i hate fine print" p

So, Laura, define the female peevster for us...I humbly submit
that I have satisfactorily described the masculine Ur-Peever.

Mythologically yours,
Charles
-- 
Within the span of the last few weeks I have heard elements of
separate threads which, in that they have been conjoined in time,
struck together to form a new chord within my hollow and echoing
gourd. --Unknown net.person
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: ataylor@nmsu.edu (Nosy)
Subject: White Sands (the movie) Peeve
Organization: NMSU Computer Science
Distribution: alt
Date: Wed, 16 Sep 1992 03:14:52 GMT


	I just saw a review of "White Sands", the movie
	which was filmed in some various bits of Nuevo
	Mexico sometime back; the producers *may* have 
	even filmed the parts alleged to be in Taos in
	or near the town of Taos (unlike McCloud, a rotten
	TV show from Those Fabulous '70's). 

	Well, it ain't showing in 'Merika as far as I can
	tell; it's "just opened in England, where they like
	it; maybe because it's impossible to figure out what
	the heck is going on most of the time", according
	to a "movie reviewer" on The Nashville Network....

ObPeeve: a movie (or "film" if you wish) that was shot in
	 Nuevo Mexico ain't available in that State. 

	Phoo-eee.

	I'd ask for a review of "White Sands" from the peevers
	of the SemiUnitedKingdom, but God alone knows what 
	would result........


Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: hillman@carina.unm.edu (Dan Hillman)
Subject: Re: Byte me
Date: Thu, 10 Sep 92 14:11:22 GMT
Organization: Legion of Cheese Puffs

In article <01snvz_.rickg@netcom.com> rickg@netcom.com (Rick Gordon) writes:
>
>I pulled out seven "return" cards, some as big as an entire page, before
>giving up.  You know, the things that make it impossible to riffle
>through the magazine, but they're sewn into the spine (or glued or
>pasted) rather than blown in so ripping each one out is a pain.

BoneUs Peeve: Byte, the magazine subscription that *wouldn't die*.

I was given a mongo-cheap subscription to Byte as some sort of professional
courtesy thingie (like a year for $5), and, being under the influence of
that evil disease, "what the hell," I got it.

The subscription ran out months ago, but I *still* get these letters in
the mail, envelopes covered with YOU'VE ALREADY WON (or some such
nonsense), which, when opened, indicate that I've already "won" wicked 
fine reviews and if I want to continue to receive this fine shit, along
with valuable advice from Jerry "let me tell you about my sweaty personal
life" Pournelle, I need only pony up a few more bucks for another year.
Well pony *this*, Byte.

Just a quick note on Jerry Pournelle. He's a wanker. My "favorite" column
is a tie between the time when he took three pages to decribe the trauma 
he had *underlining* in his (what else) new book or when he described,
via his children, the "best" Macintosh to take to school. Infuriating
quote: "Richard and his roommates have concluded that the HP DeskWriter
2279A is the best buy for a printer, a good compromise between speed and
price. No one cares much for the ImageWriter II." Gosh, Pournelle's kid
convinced *me*. The next time I need hard copy from a heavy session of
MacPlaymate, I'll be sure to take his advice.


-- 
"If I had a million dollars I'd buy you a green dress.
 But not a real green dress; that's cruel."  --Barenaked Ladies
From: carolo@cse.ucsc.edu (Carol Osterbrock)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: on men
Date: 12 Sep 92 00:04:10 GMT
Organization: University of California, Santa Cruz (CE/CIS Boards)
NNTP-Posting-Host: arapaho.ucsc.edu

In article <lb28pmINNd8k@exodus.Eng.Sun.COM> bls@sector7g.Eng.Sun.COM writes:
>In article laupjbINN13c@exodus.Eng.Sun.COM, banta@blagg.Eng.Sun.COM (242 lbs before cooking) writes:
>>Peeve: People, mostly women, that go apeshit if there isn't sanitary
>>porcelain facilities immediately available.

>I was thinking about this as I drove from San Francisco to Vancouver
>last weekend past innumerable "rest stops".  My theory is that there's
>this enormous destructive urge in people, which men satisfy in a myriad
>of ways, but which women sublimate by dumping a load of shit onto
>something as white and clean as possible.

You've obviously never seen the inside of a women's room at a 
highway rest stop.  There is nothing white or clean inside any of
them.  Women in rest stops sublimate their destructive urges by
unrolling all the toilet paper on the floor and then clogging up
the toilets with tampax and flushing them until they overflow.

-carol "pees in the woods" o
-- 
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Carol Osterbrock       *       Such a long, long time to be gone
carolo@cse.ucsc.edu    *         And a short time to be there...
===============================================================================
From: geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM (Geoff Miller)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: on men
Keywords: giant toilet bowls, rump deformities, bloody gristle-missiles
Date: 11 Sep 92 19:07:53 GMT
Followup-To: alt.peeves
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Menlo Park, Ca.
NNTP-Posting-Host: purplehaze.corp.sun.com



In article <lb1lviINNd8m@exodus.Eng.Sun.COM> banta@blagg.Eng.Sun.COM
(242 lbs before cooking) writes:

>I don't remember the equating "pissing outside" to "pissing on
>someone's leg."

Neither did Larry, until I raised his consciousness one night in Sam's
backyard.


>I normally do the skinning and gutting in the back yard.  And if I have 
>to take a leak during the skinning and gutting, I *don't* go inside.

Yeah, but then you end up getting dog blood on your twanger.  It's a
no-win situation.


>You obviously haven't visited California, where it must be state law
>the everyone, fuckin' everyone, has a 6 foot wood slat fence around
>their yard.  

I was in Oklahoma City one time (but I recovered), and while in the
backyard of the family I was visiting, I noticed that everyone in the
neighborhood had waist-high chain-link fences around their yards rather
than proper 6-7 foot wooden ones that afford some degree of privacy.  It
was bizarre; I could see into everyone's back yard all the way to the
end of the block.  Why would people do that?  Being a Californian, I've
always looked upon the suburban backyard as a private place, an outdoor
sanctuary from the prying eyes of humanity.  I've seen a lot of 
neighborhoods back east in which nobody has fences of *any* kind.


>And since all my neighbors are distaff octogenarians, they'd probably 
>look with longing reminiscence rather than disgust.

Perhaps those smiles you've noticed were more the result of sardonic
amusement more than longing <heh> reminiscence...


>Anti-peeve: no screaming rugrats in the neighborhood.

Oh, they're there, alright; they're just few and far between.  I recall
one weekend afternoon while I was squatting down to work on some piece
of racing hardware in your driveway, wearing Levi's, and some kid rode
by on a bike and yelled, "Hey, I can see the crack of your butt!"  I felt
like Dan Aykroyd in that sketch about the refrigerator repairman.



Geoff



-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-
  "Myself, I work best in temperatures below 50 degreesF.  Not only does it 
  keep me from falling asleep at the terminal, but it makes my nips perk up 
            in a most attractive manner." -- Jenny Gutbezahl 
-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-
From: banta@blagg.Eng.Sun.COM (242 lbs before cooking)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Payroll peeve
Date: 12 Sep 1992 07:08:14 GMT
Organization: Sun, Moon, and Stars
NNTP-Posting-Host: blagg

Unbelievably, (Jenni Sheehey) writes:
>Hi ho.  I'm back, sortof.  Trying to use unix.  I hate unix.

Geez.  Years ago, I saw an alias file to make csh perfrom like jcl.
This was back when god-fearing VAXen ruled the earth, and they
*still* had the first part of each alias "sleep 5;"  I passed it by
as the joke I thought it was.

I've seen quite a few religious wars over the years, but never have
I seen someone tout VM over Unix.

>OOBPeeve:  I have had to become gainfully employed again.  

Did they make you pee in a bottle?

drew
banta@abingdon.sun.com
--
"He who hasn't hacked assembly language as a youth has no
 heart. He who does so as an adult has no brain."  - John Moore
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: potler@umbc4.umbc.edu (Laura Potler (GSFC))
Subject: Re: on men
Keywords: giant toilet bowls, rump deformities
Organization: University of Maryland Baltimore Campus
Date: Thu, 10 Sep 1992 22:10:49 GMT

In article <laupjbINN13c@exodus.Eng.Sun.COM> banta@blagg.Eng.Sun.COM (242 lbs before cooking) andy "wiz" banta writes:
>(Laura Potler(GSFC)) writes:
>>peeve: men who insist on going to the bathroom outdoors when there's
>>	indoor facilities nearby.
>
>Let me get this straight, potler:  

take your time, andy. sound out the big words.

>If I'm in my back yard, I'm
>supposed to go into the house and piss in some porcelain bucket?  Why?

because the world is not your toilet? because we're in the 20th century?
because, except for your dates, most women don't enjoy the feel of your 
urinating on their leg. because if you use your method, the dog gets 
angry and tries to mark the kitchen in revenge? because the neighbors
have already complained about your open air dingus fondling? because 
you can? 

>Is this supposed to be one of those women's rights things?  Deal with

not that i'm aware of. 

>Peeve: People, mostly women, that go apeshit if there isn't sanitary
>porcelain facilities immediately available.

well, i'm sure you prefer the unsanitary kind when not hearing the call
of the wild.

>>obcuriosity: do you suppose that after years of wearing a wallet in
>>	the same pocket, men's rumps start to deform to accomodate
>>	the wallet?
>
>Doubt it.  After years of carrying a purse, do women's shoulders get
>little rain gutters in them?

sure. that's why we switch off.

-l "i can't believe how much mail i've gotten on this" p

-- 
-lp  **********************************************************************
*   "the *ocean* is affected by the phases of the moon but men aren't?!"  * 
*							--Anne Tucker     *
***************************************************************************
From: russ@bbxrbk (Russ Kepler)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Mea Culpa
Date: 13 Sep 92 00:32:08 GMT
Organization: russ at home

OK, I did it.  It was me (I? - screw that).  I sent the New Mexico
peevers into the never-never land of the Sandias to look for a picnic
ground that didn't exist.  It was bad instructions, written when I was
tired and I neglected one little thing: the name of the picnic
grounds.  OK, one small other thing, I misspelled the name of the one
near it as one a wee bit away, maybe 10-12 miles down.  Of course, no
one mentioned any of these faults until *today*, after hunting for me
and ER for a couple of hours.

But I had a very nice picnic, and I didn't have to share my beer with
anyone other than ER, and she drinks very slowly.

I'm still trying to understand why someone would come the radioactive
New Mexico desert in a vacation...

-- 
Russ Kepler, posting from home
Will hack unix for food 		(.sig stolen from dt - sorry, dt)
From: padutton@wpi.WPI.EDU (Peter Alan Dutton)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Nipple debate (was: Boss Peeve)
Date: 15 Sep 1992 22:05:25 GMT
Organization: Worcester Polytechnic Institute
NNTP-Posting-Host: wpi.wpi.edu

In article <17613@autodesk.COM> booter@Autodesk.COM (Elaine Richards) writes:
>In article <1992Sep14.224604.4394@news.iastate.edu> z1dan@exnet.iastate.edu (Dan Sorenson) writes:
>>hosch2263@iscsvax.uni.edu writes:

>>>        However, for the record, I am a 38DD...

>>	Congrats and all that -- you are Peevetowns official Ear-Warmer,
>>just as soon as the Immigration and Employment officers get done with
>>the paperwork.  You know how slow beurocracies can be sometimes...

>Hm, I veto that. Just because a woman has large breasts does not mean
>she is willing to share them.

Peeve: Well, that's the problem with women. They're too selfish!

(thought I'd bring this thread back to peevedom)

Peter!

Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: baldwin@carina.unm.edu (Chris Baldwin)
Subject: Re: Disrespectful people
Date: Sat, 05 Sep 92 15:35:25 GMT
Organization: Atheist for the Development of a Better God

In article <Bu11oA.AwK@belay> cryst@belay (Crystal Bell) writes:
>Peeve: (Not meaning any offense at all to sny Senior Citizens out there) 
>I know that seniors can be really, really obnoxious sometimes. But that is 
>still No reason to be obnoxious back. 
	What better reason is there to be obnoxious to some one? This is
the only really good reason that I can think of.

>On our transit system there are seats
>designated very plainly marking certain seats as designated senior citizens
>and handicapped persons. 
	Now, I can understand the reasoning behind having special seating
for the hadicapped, but whatinthefuck is there special seating for the
elderly? The ones who need this special seating, this being the ones who
are hadicapped, are already covered by the handicapped seating. As for the
rest of them, let'um find a seat with the rest of us.

>I have always been taught to give my seat to a senior citizen. 
	Me too, but what does this have to do with priority seating. You
are not giving up your seat if you are not allowed to sit there in the
first place.

>Who I might be tempted to think his licence came out of a cracker jack box.
	Watch it! You're wandering into !Al's domain. You'd better clear
this with him before giving up any more bus peeves.

> **Crystal**
BTW, in the goofy name thread someone mentioned Clint. That and this post
reminded me of some people I know. They're names are Crystal and Duke. Anyway,
they got married and had a kid. They named it Clint. 

-- 
Chris Baldwin                | Robert Johnson invented the pickle! 
baldwin@carina.unm.edu       |                         - Adam Reid
          If I were a carpenter I'd hammer on my piglet. -- TMBG