From: mirza@sce.carleton.ca (Murad A. Mirza)
Subject: Re: WARNING: Virus Alert! : -)
Organization: Carleton University
Date: Wed, 15 Apr 1992 14:06:09 GMT

anajam@athena.mit.edu (ADIL NAJAM) writes:


>          ----->     M A J O R  U. S.  V I R U S E S    <-----

>*  George Bush Virus - Doesn't do anything, but you can't get rid of it
>   until November.

>*  Ted Kennedy Virus - Crashes your computer but denies it ever happened.

>*  Jerry Brown Virus - Blanks your screen and begins flashing an 800 number.

>*  David Duke Virus - Makes your screen go completely white.

>*  Congress Virus - Overdraws your disk space.

>*  Paul Tsongas Virus - Pops up on Dec. 25 and says "I'm Not Santa Claus".

>*  Pat Buchanan Virus - Shifts all output to the extreme right of the
>   screen.

>*  Bill Clinton Virus - This virus mutates from region to region.  We're
>   not exactly sure what it does.

>  


>         ----->   S O M E    D E S I   V I R U S E S   <-----


>*  Ziaul Haq virus - Says its a temporary virus (only 90 days), but the
>   only way to get rid of it is to destroy the hard disk along with all
>   other software.......including your imported "Ambassadorial special" and 
>   Rahman Utilities.

>*  Ghulam Ishaq Virus - Can gets rid of all other viruses at will, but the 
>   system still does not work.

>*  Nawaz Sharif virus - We are still not sure "what" this virus does.....but we
>   are sure it does something.

>*  Benazir Bhutto virus - This virus is self-destructive.

>*  Asif Zardari virus - This virus is really a bug. When present in conjunction
>   with the Benazir Bhutto virus, it serves as cataylist in the later's
>   self-destruction.

>*  Mohammad Khan Junejo virus - The most system-friendly virus that ever was...
>   ...it got killed by the system.

>*  Mirza Aslam Beg virus - Originally marketed as an anti-virus program. Has
>   unique ability to stay in the system even after it has gone.

>*  G.M. Khar virus - This virus is only interested in (fun and) games software.

>*  Aitizaz Ahsan virus - The virus that never was.

>*  Nawabzada Nasrullah Khan virus - You cannot get rid of this one; but its
>   presence makes no difference what-so-ever.

>*  Asghar Khan Virus - Promises to be an important virus....but consistently
>   fails to enter the system.

>*  Altaf Hussain virus - Can cause major system standstills even when itself
>   incapacitated.

>*  G.M. Syed virus - This virus is activated only when (and if) you notice it.

>*  Abida Hussain virus - This virus promises to do a lot of damage, but never
>   really does it.

>*  Mahbub-ul-Haq virus - This virus thinks it is a virus....but it is not....
>   it's not even a bug.  The only damage it does is through its inaction.

>*  Jam Sadiq virus - Attacks and devours diskspace....whole cities of them.....
>   the only cells (once) safe from it (were) 70 Clifton and the marble domed
>   mosoleum.  Its destruction lingers after its death.

>*  Z.A. Bhutto virus - This virus, now extinct, was too big for the system; any
>   system; it was too big for its own good.

>*  Mujeeb-ur-Rehman virus - Can't get rid of it without permanently losing 
>   RAM capacity.

>*  Hamood-ur-Rehman virus - Won't let you open your files.....and when you do,
>   there won't be anything in them.

>*  Bureaucracy virus - This is the super-virus-killer.....no virus ever was, or
>   ever will be allowed to enter its diskspace.  In fact, this virus believes
>   its the DOS.

>*  GHQ virus - This is not a virus at all.......this IS the power supply.....
>   not only that, this is what programs all those other viruses.......the 
>   only way to control this virus is through the Uncle Sam virus.

>============================================

>More to follow..........additions, suggestions to the list may be sent to
>anajam@athena.mit.edu  (ADIL NAJAM)

>=============================================

assalam alaikum

already just by reading i am getting convolutions (may be a viral infection).
whhat a wundarfuul collection of viruses, wah, wah. since i am a professional
virologist too, therefore i have some disagreement on a couple of the above
viruses.

what do you think about the Chief Virus Officer (CVO), Iblis - this virus
is Naari and provides Iron supplements to other viruses of his liking?

Question?
are these Aids virus like or they can be gotten rid off without much ado?
and is any research being done anywhere?

khuda hafiz

Murad [Allah hi bachaay in Virusoun say] Mirza.