From: chaneysa@nextnet.csus.edu (Stephen A Chaney)
Subject: Re: STEVE FRANKLIN STRIKES BACK! (moderately funny for me anyways)
Keywords: ha.  ho.  hum.   hee.   heh.
Organization: California State University: Sacramento
Distribution: world 
Date: Wed, 12 Aug 1992 22:39:04 GMT


This article is the absolutely most devastating thing I have ever seen
in my entire stay on USENET. No single human being could possibly take
this much damage in one sitting and not go absolutely crazy.

Even "Borgie Boy" (yours truly) couldn't take hits like this... 


In article <BsuHnn.582@cs.dal.ca> franklin@ug.cs.dal.ca (<<<***Steve Franklin***>>>) writes:
>In article <lefty-110892103039@lefty.apple.com> lefty@apple.com (Lefty) writes:
>>In article <BsoEBo.DFI@cs.dal.ca>, franklin@ug.cs.dal.ca (<<<***Steve
>>Franklin***>>>) wrote:
>>> 
>>> 
>>>    Sheez Lefty. Do you not get it? I am not seeking any sort of
>>> respect from the net.
>>
>>Gee, Steve, then why do you keep begging for some kind of affirmation from
>>your betters?  I can repost your email to me insisting that I concede your
>>superior intellect, if you like.
>
>  Heh - Lefty, I did ask you to concede to a superior being. However, this
>was not for MY benefit but yours. No longer should you remain in your
>"LeftyLand" where all sorts of wierd things happen... This is one
>wierd land where Lefty thinks:
>   a) he has friends
>   b) he is intelligent
>   c) he is important
>   d) he is going to be remembered 20 years after he dies
>   e) he is happy...
>
>Then, back in Reality, what these 5 fine points can be interpreted as is:
>   a) he has a computer, gifs, and lots of porn
>   b) he could beat the pants off of a house plant when playing chess
>   c) he controls entire armies (only on his little IBM video games however)
>   d) he will be found 20 years after he dies ("Man, the smelll")
>   e) he is happy (because he thinks he is in LeftyLand)

I couldn't find a f) to add to that. Mr. Franklin, you genuinely
scored a knockoutus perfectus, right here. 

>I was trying to conk you back into Reality Lefty. One of these days you
>have to realize you are not overwhelmingly interesting or intelligent.
>One of these days you must realize that the fridge light DOES go off
>when you shut the door. I don't think these days are too far away for you.

You should now start getting e-mail by people begging you to stop, for
this is getting too funny - or painful, to some - to read. :) 

>>> I do not need my self-image nourished by the likes of you.
>>
>>If that's the case, I don't understand why you get so upset when I refuse
>>to nourish your self-image.
>
>   Because I pity you. I don't want you to nourish my image, but to
>acknowledge your lowly one. see?

Look at his b.s. He acts like you _need_ his help. Lefty is a blind
man trying to tell a man with 20-20 vision, what he's seeing. 

>>> This is your flaw. You can't separate REALITY from USENETland. You
>>> like to treat the two as the same. I can easily say that I will probably
>>> outgrow USENET, but why the hell haven't you?
>>
>>Based on your postings, it seems unlikely that you've outgrown sucking your
>>thumb.  If this is some kind of veiled hint that you wish I'd go away and
>>stop picking on you, I have no particular plans in that direction.  Too bad
>>for you, eh?
>>
>   You always fantasize about other men sucking on body parts? My, you
>are a repressed one now aren't you? I wouldn't want you to stop
>picking on me Lefty. I find you utterly entertaining, if not pathetic.
>It surprises me that you can pull yourself away from your oh-so important
>big-manly-computer job. How old are you Lefty? I'd like to know. Care
>to entertain me yet again? 

Well, outgrowing USENET is one thing: I use it as training. That and I
pick up fellow pro-lifers here. That's an endless job, hopefully. 
As for Internet, I won't outgrow that. :) I'll just add onto it. 

But for those who live and die by USENET... Well, Lefty can tell us.
Just don't remove his USENET access or eegads, he'll die. :)  

>>> >Why else would you be so shamelessly sucking up to Kevin?
>>> 
>>>    I haven't sucked up to a single individual.
>>
>>Yes, yes, I understand that Kevin considers himself (when it's convenient)
>>to be a group rather than an individual, but you're still weaseling here,
>>Steve.
>>
>   I'm not weaseling in the least Lefty. I do not suck up to individuals.

Tch tch, Franklin. That sucking thing again. ;-) 

>   You know my feelings on that. I have no sympathy for a child-abuser,
>and I have no sympathy for any such acts of agression, sexually, or
>mentally motivated. However, the fact that Sue's spouse/boyfriend was
>vague on a post, and then that this fact was pounced upon by the 
>Pro-Choice-Anti-Anyone-who-chooses-against-them group from talk.abortion.

Such as the Pat Ira Roby Gang who flamed Siren right off the net,
because she, the most respected and head-screwed-on-straight-est
pro-choicer on talk.abortion, had committed the heinous crime of asking 
for peace? 

After seeing how the others treat him, I'd be more in Darcy's camp
than against.. 

>See? I do not think Darcy meant what you intend. Then, facing against a group
>of ASCII-hounds like yourself, he responded a touch poorly. All I know,
>is that he apologized, and you continued to be an Anal-ostrich 
>
>def: anal-ostrich: n, One who, rather than bury his head in the sand
>insists on burying it up his ass.

That's a classic. A pure, original classic. Let's just stop and give
this one a hearty round of applause because frankly, it is dead
accurate.  

>   Here's your assurance. I am not desperate, but damn this is fun. You don't
>enjoy this I think, and that saddens me a bit. However, I'd rather me have
>all the fun than you. You say I have no idea what I'm babbling about? Heh,
>this is great. I can't agree, but it's still funny.
>
>>Polly want a cracker?
>
>Lefty want a life?

Polly can't have a cracker - it would mean Lefty might not have a
life. :) 

>   I take offense to the fact that my writing is abominable and blurry.
>I pride take my writing in. I don't expect people to take me serious in
>posts like this. If you are, then I beg that you cease and desist. You
>may be to old to be playing this game Lefty, but you should still enjoy
>it. However, there are times when I have posted with utmost in seriousness.
>I guess you missed these, or they didn't correspond with your views.

Well, get ready because there is one group that does take a joke
seriously: 

The Pat Ira Roby Gang. 

>>Well, I know it when I see it. 
>>
>
>   Some of us disagree. I was being sarcastic again. Whoopsie, you missed
>that didn't you? Must I be more blunt in my sarcasm? Okay, try these:
>   GEE LEFTY< I THINK YOU"RE C00L!
>   GEE LEFTY< YOU MUST BE A D0-0D!
>   there. those were sarcasm. Not true. False. Meant to be taken with a
>grain of Lefty's brain. see?

But Steve, a grain is all his brain _HAS_. 

>[now, lefty feels the need to scoop back into the archives to prove
>a point that is not worth proving (prooving? 8)  ) In any case, I guess
>he really DOESN"T have anything better to do... Lefty does seem
>to post an awful lot during the day though huh? LEfty - don't you work?
>Or do you just spend all lunch hour and every tea-break playing with
>your toy?)

Well, Steve, you know that no one else wants to talk to him, so all he
does is go to where people will talk to him. 

Like, here. We talk to him. Harshly, but still it's talk. He needs
communication. 

And a therapist. 

>  No - this is not a anti-kevin-and-stevie - you folks on talk.abortion
>are (once again I will reiterate the point)
>Pro-Choice-Anti-Anyone-who-chooses-against-them group. See? There was a
>time when I posted in seriousness to talk.abortion. However, ya just
>can't win. This is a group that is dominated by individuals by yourself
>who have selective logic. This means that everything you say makes sense
>to you, and anything anyone else says that doesn't correspond to your
>thinking is trash. Unfortunately, some of us dont' see it that way. 
>I don't actually give a flying fu*k that you don't agree with me.
>Life is more entertaining that way. However, it pisses me off that
>you guys shut the trap of every frigging newbie that comes on talk.abortion
>with your rehearsed intimidations. Unfortunately, you are now in a rut.
>I find you dull, repetitive, and rehearsed, and I bet there are others
>out there who agree with me (besides Elvis). 

This is getting outrageously funny. That and there's a ring of serious
truth here. 

>>I can imagine that you must be having just _reams_ of fun making a visible
>>idiot of yourself on a worldwide basis.
>>
>   YOu realy think I"m a visible idiot do you? You don't think there are
>even a few people grinning at this post? Not in mock, jest, or
>embarassment, but in fun? Guess you need a little education Lefty.
>Incedentally, I gotta tell ya. This ain't the whole world. This is a small
>component of what you deal with in REALITY Lefty. Get it through your head
>USENET DOES NOT EQUAL REALITY. Maybe that's why you like it so much?

This is too horrendous for even yours truly, "Borgie Boy," to bear. 

Have mercy on the kid, Steve! 

>  The question is Lefty, who talks to you besides me and Kevin? I see
>little exchange between you and anyone beside me and Kev. In fact,
>*warning, scary thought follows*
>Me and Kevin are the closest thing to friends you have on USENET. UGH
>Just because you agree with the other weenies on the net, doesn't mean
>they actually like you or enjoy your posts. Get it?

I'm calling the cops, Steve. You're killing the man with more
punishment than one man should ever have to endure in one article.
Just kidding. :) 

>>The fact is, I _do_ enjoy beating the crap out of a pea-brained,
>>big-mouthed twit such as yourself.
>>
>   Why don't you try doing this then? I haven't even seen you try.
>Instead, you act like an ass most of the time. No, multiple asses.
>You are an Anii.

Too late. He's dead. 

>>>       Nothing better to do?
>>
>>Not right now.
>
>That's too bad Lefty. When ARE you going to have something better to do?
>I hope you believe in reincarnation, because you've sure screwed up
>this life from what I can see...

I sure hope he believes in reincarnation, too. He's going to need
about 9 of them by the time you get finished.  

[Ensuing slaughter, too graphic for those underaged folks without
parental guidance, deleted.] 


>Please put "I want to be your friend" in the subject line or our 
>vice-president will not read them.
>
>steve
>
>p.s. - aawhh, come on Lefty. This was purely in fun. Don't be mad. You
>gotta treat this stuff more lightly. Cheers!

Aw, you mean you let him _live?_ 

>-- 
>aasdSteveFranklin-Subliminal Psychology Major.ks;dlasBlueJaysRULEkasdfeahsdbfl
>sd;lfaswoq[eBuyMeAQuadra!!!mbnZMXCNdfsba;KdSPAMiuroqiyetIBMSuxiweuryth'ewr;mxn
>qpuepriuPartyOneqtuj;,n.,xnc,kjasFlameMeNot!;lkj;lkgkjd;askElvisLivesjhfquweru
>zx.cfranklin@ug.cs.dal.ca,sk;t;lrut[Superboy@ac.dal.cav.zx,Physics!eq3rwkh;oHA


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