From: jgd@dixie.com (John De Armond)
Subject: Kids and hazards (was Re: No Hot Water!)
Date: Sat, 23 Jan 93 07:12:22 GMT
Organization: Dixie Communications Public Access.  The Mouth of the South.

smb@research.att.com (Steven Bellovin) writes:

>Do you have any kids, John?  From your past postings, I don't think so
>(i.e., your posting about how you got out of your house when you had
>that fire.  An excellent article, btw.)

Oh heavens no and thank you respectively :-)  An hour or two dose of 
rug rats at a time is all I can stand.  Now I know I'm treading on 
sacred ground where it is asserted that no kid-less person could possibly
know how to manage a kid.  I disagree, of course, as I would with
the assertion that because I've never been nuked with radiation sickness,
I cannot know about it as a health-physicist.  My point of reference is 
how my parents raised my brother and I and how I have to manage guests with
kids when they come to my house.  The latter, particularly, graphicly 
points out what is wrong with the way most people raise their kids.

>You'd be amazed at how fast kids can get into trouble.  And you not only
>*can't* watch them every second, you shouldn't -- how else can they learn
>to do things on their own.  (I should point out, of course, that this
>is a direct corollary to the attitude I strongly suspect you have towards
>the government -- that at a certain point, people, big or small, have to
>be allowed to take responsibility.)  It's my job as a parent to walk
>a very fine line on that matter -- and to try my damnedest to ensure
>that the inevitable mistakes aren't dangerous.

You are right about my attitude toward government regarding adults.
However I am NOT one of those who believes kids are really little 
adults trapped in immature bodies, what with rights and such.  I believe 
young children should obey without question and be seen and not heard.
That was the way I was raised and I think it worked quite well.
My parents DID watch us all the time.  That was possible because 
even at the earliest age, we were trained (with whippings when we 
disobeyed) to obey.  Part of that obeying was staying where we were 
instructed.  My parents did not and did not need to kidproof the
house.  Indeed, my father kept loaded firearms in plain view.  We
never touched them.  We knew better.  My mother did not allow kids in the 
house except in the playroom and then only under her continuous supervision.

Yes, it's a damn hard job, a job I decided I was not up to which is one
reason I don't have kids.  Unfortunately most of the people I know who
have kids don't even try.  I've had some interesting moments with 
friends' kids in my house.  My making them obey me and not talk back
appears to be the first real discipline they'd ever had.

If I did have a kid, I'd deal with minimal risk hazards like hot tap
water by letting the kid touch it and get a little burn while under
supervision.  Same way I learned about such stuff.  Other than when
supervised, he'd be trained to stay away from the bathroom until I
judged him capable of handling the risks.  About Jr High or so :-)

I don't think undisciplined kids are anything new.  I can remember my 
mother complaining about many of the kids I went to school with.
I can also remember how cruel I thought mom and dad were for being
so strict.  Worked out pretty well, I think, and I'm now proud they
were.  My thoughts on this are simply an extension of my views on
the relationship of the government and the people.  All irresponsible
parents do is give the government more excuses to invade our 
lives with more regulations and laws.

John
-- 
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