HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: nanook@psycho.fidonet.org (Keith Dickinson)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: STAR TREK PRANKS
Date: Sun, 13 Sep 92 07:58:06 EDT
Organization: Psycho: The Usenet<->Fidonet Gateway of St. Pete Florida

 > From: ccspjs@gdr.bath.ac.uk (Pete J Suters)
 > Date: 8 Sep 92 12:45:19 GMT

 > In article <427pb8q3@cck.coventry.ac.uk> aph016@cch.coventry.ac.uk

 >   There is a theory to suggest that, had the dinosaurs survived, they
 > would have eventually evolved an intelligent humanoid form.  Who's
 > to say that, given similar conditions to Earth, that alien life
 > forms would have also developed into humanoids, although not
 > necessarily mamalian humanoids.
 >   Or have I been watching too much "V" in the past ?  :-)

Actualy it sounds like the vague memory of the Gorn that Kirk fought and refused to kill at the insistance of a "god-like-alian" in STOS.

---
 * Origin: Of all of natures vegetables, only the Beet goes on... (1:3603/75)
--  
Fidonet : 1:3603/75.0  EchoNet: 50:5813/75.0    | psycho is a FREE gateway
Internet: nanook@Psycho.Fidonet.Org             | for Fidonet. For more
  or    : nanook@bigguy.timeplex.com            | information on how to
UUCP    : uunet!tct.com!psycho!nanook           | send/recieve mail write
USnail  : 5146 Foxbridge Cir, Clearwater FL     | to root@psycho.fidonet.org
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Smilies wanted for compilation!
From: $ennsnr@brandonu.ca
Date: 14 Sep 92 16:51:08 CST
Organization: Brandon University, Brandon, Manitoba, Canada

O.K. folks! I am REALLY bored, so it's time to start a compilation. Could all
you computer people (and any other people as well) send me your smilies?

You know, things like : :-)  :-(  :>  ;)

The above are really simple, so please send me your smilies and their meaning.
After I have recieved enough, I will post the listing on rec.humor.

I figure with all you people out there, I should have enough smilies to make a
file in one or tow days.

SO SEND IN YOU SIMILEIS!!!! PLEASE!!!! I will be so happy if you do! :-)

As well, if you want me to e-mail you a completed copy of the list, send me your
e-mail address. (Include a smilie if you have one!)

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

|\    |  _____ ______                 People who don't read are brutes
| \   | |        |    |				-- Eugene Inesco
|  \  | |---     |    |               --------------------------------
|   \ | |        |    |               Neil Enns
|    \| |_____ __|___ |_____          $ennsnr@brandonU.ca

Disclaimer: The views in this message are not necessairily those expressed by
Brandon University. However, if they wish to use some of them, I would be
flattered!

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
From: sxjwg@orca.alaska.edu
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: POLITICALLY CORRECT DOUBLE SPEAK????
Date: 4 Sep 92 20:15:22 GMT
Organization: University of Alaska

Anyone heard of any "politically correct" phrases during this election.

I have two for you.

Some hospitals call a patient that dies on the operating table:

NEGATIVE PATIENT OUTCOME

The Pentagon called the Army operation by airborne troops:

A PRE-DAWN VERTICAL INSERTION

A book by the name DOUBLE SPEAK is supposed full of this stuff.  Don't know the
author's name though.

-- 

********************************************************************************
    UNIVERSITY OF ALASKA - FAIRBANKS, UNIVERSITY OF ALASKA COMPUTER NETWORK
                   James W. (Jim) Grimes, SXJWG@ORCA.ALASKA.EDU
THIRD ANNUAL FARTHEST NORTH COUNTRY WESTERN DANCE FESTIVAL-MARCH 5, 6 & 7, 1993
  Call (907) 479-4282 or write FNCWDF, PO Box 82683, Fairbanks, AK 99708-2683
********************************************************************************
Xref: sparky rec.humor:28071 talk.bizarre:29208
From: dsc3jfs@nmrdc1.nmrdc.nnmc.navy.mil (Jim Small)
Newsgroups: rec.humor,talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Bush Campaign TV Ad
Date: 8 Sep 92 10:41:10 GMT
Organization: Naval Medical Research & Development Command

In article <1992Sep8.040203.8397@newshub.ariel.yorku.ca> cs902117@ariel.yorku.ca (TONY D'ALFONSO) writes:
>
>I always thought that a civil servant is someone who gets paid to do no work
>and can't lose his job.  

You mean, like me?

-- 
I hate the 3B2
The 3B2 can bite me.
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: wilsonk@infonode.ingr.com (Keith Wilson)
Subject: Re: American joke (oxymoron)
Organization: Intergraph Corporation, Huntsville, AL.
Date: Fri, 11 Sep 1992 20:16:43 GMT

In article <1992Sep9.135101.10450@inesc.pt>, usenet@inesc.pt (USENET News System) writes:
> >In article <1992Sep7.164904.16653@inesc.pt> jota@iguana.UUCP (Joao Pedro Martins) writes:
> >>
> >>	Can someone *PLEASE* tell me what a "oxymoron" is ???
> >>
> 	Case u haven't noticed, I live in Portugal, and the dictionaries I have
> are GOOD dictionaries. I guess the only problem with them is beeing _ENGLISH_ - portuguese, and not _AMERICAN_-Portuguese. (One of them is ENGLISH-ENGLISH).
> 	So, will u tell me what's the meaning of it or what ?
> ----
>  joao Pedro Martins, Lisboa, Portugal - jota@tutor.UUCP

Good thing the American dictionary failed to erroneously mention that the
capital of Portugal was Hiroshima?

And remember, George Bush did for the economy what Harry Truman did for
Hiroshima.

But also remember the alternative: Bill Clinton.
From: biggles@cybernet.cse.fau.edu (Matthew Barton)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Hurricane Joke
Date: 9 Sep 92 16:35:16 GMT
Organization: Cybernet BBS, Boca Raton, Florida

One of the more unexpected things to result from hurricane Andrew
relief efforts IMHO is the call for donated supplies, namely

    Feminine Hygene Products          (y'know,  tampons!)

Seems to me they don't mention these little things in a
hurricane preparedness checklist. Maybe they're using them for
other devious purposes?      The possibilities are there.  :/

--------------------------------------------------------------------------
<biggles@cybernet.cse.fau.edu    Florduh Atlantic University, Boca Raton>
From: drg@biomath.mda.uth.tmc.edu (David Gutierrez)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: R U lokoing for Lydia?
Date: 10 Sep 1992 20:12:59 GMT
Organization: Univ. Texas M.D. Anderson Cancer Center

In article <1992Sep9.233758.16276@henson.cc.wwu.edu> grege@henson.cc.wwu.edu
(Gregory M Ellis) writes:
>The movie was "At the Circus" or something like that, and Groucho sang it in
>a train car with all the circus people around.  It was a complete song, and
>he performed an outstanding whirling, kicking groucho-dance with it.  I used
>to know pretty much all of the song, but haven't had to recall it for
>eons......the bits and pieces I do remember aren't worth listing...sorry...

There is also an old movie in which a little girl sings this entire song (or
most of it) to a couple of visitors. I think it might have been "The
Philadelphia Story", or possibly the inferior musical knock-off "High Society".

David Gutierrez
drg@biomath.mda.uth.tmc.edu

"Only fools are positive." - Moe Howard
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: sdt8s@poe.acc.Virginia.EDU (Steve Tilson)
Subject: Re: wanted: funny answering machine messages
Organization: University of Virginia
Distribution: rec
Date: Mon, 14 Sep 1992 03:22:16 GMT

If these responses could be mailed to me as well, I'd be most
appreciative. (And that and fifty cents will buy you not a heck
of a lot...)

Steve
--
Language is a virus from Outer Space.      |-----------------------------|
And hearing your name                      | Steve Tilson                |
Is better                                  | sdt8s@poe.acc.virginia.edu  |
Than seeing your face.   (Laurie Anderson) |-----------------------------|
From: beaurega@ireq.hydro.qc.ca (Denis Beauregard)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: READ/NEXT
Date: 11 Sep 92 13:41:03 GMT
Organization: Institut de recherche d'Hydro-Quebec, Varennes, Canada

In article <1992Sep4.130444.60@taney.uscghq.uscg.mil> lederman@taney.uscghq.uscg.mil writes:
>
>   I haven't read all of the articles here, and seeing all of the
> flames I may not.  But since the request was made for American
> jokes, here is one.  (I understand this joke originated in
> Poland, so it's a Polish joke as well, in the proper sense.)  I
> hope it's not a repeat.
>
> Q: How many Americans does it take to change a lightbulb?
>
> A: 643.  When the bulbs burn out they tear down the building and
>          put up a new one.

Like this one :
when the ashtray is full, they buy a new car...

-- 
  \_\    Denis Beauregard  *  internet:beaurega@ireq.hydro.qc.ca
 /   \   Genealogiste officiel : Beauregard/Jarret/Jarest/Vincent
J   __>  Un Quebec renouvele dans une Amerique renovee
\_.-===                                                  Opinions ? Et pis non !
Newsgroups: rec.humor,rec.humor.d
From: s7356911@deimos.ucc.umass.edu (DYLYN)
Subject: Re: A joke?
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41    
Organization: University of Massachusetts, Amherst
Date: Tue, 15 Sep 1992 04:55:00 GMT

(M-x sarcasm-mode)

In article <1992Sep14.193125.24632@newshost.unh.edu>, ss1@kepler.unh.edu 
(The Rink) writes...
> 
>A person died without Christ and went to hell for eternity.
> 
>Oh, I'm sorry -- this is for humor.  But the devil is laughing his head off! 

	...and answers once and for all the question:
		``Sure there are lots of famous Jewish comedians,
	but why aren't there any famous _Christian_ comedians?''

					dylyn
----------------_______________-----------------______________-------------
   ``I heal your wounds		I set you free,
	I'm Jesus Christ 		On Ecstacy''
						---Pigface,``Suck''
_/\  /\ dylyn (aka, d prosser) == S7356911@UCSVAX.UCS.umass.edu  /\
   \/  \/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/  \/~~~~~
From: jle@locus.com (John Elghani/10000000)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Steel  Brush Joke.
Date: 7 Sep 92 08:16:19 GMT
Organization: LC


A man went next door and asked his lady neigbor for a steel brush.  The
lady wondered why; he said :  My male dog doesn't jump my female
dog except when I rub his back with a brush, and he's getting
too old, he's needing a steel brush to get him sex-active immediately. She gave
him the brush.  A few days later, the man knocked at the door to return
the brush, the women's old husband opened.  Here's the brush I borrowed
for so and so (explained the story), thanks; the dog owner said.  It's you,
you SOB, that taught this trick to my wife, look at my 
bleeding back and peeled off penis, you SOB; SLAM in the face.  

jle
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: susanm@an.hp.com (Susan Margulies)
Subject: MLK Jr joke (was Re: Christian Joke)
Organization: Hewlett-Packard, Santa Clara Division
X-Newsreader: Tin 1.1.3 PL5
Date: Wed, 9 Sep 1992 21:15:20 GMT

: > Why don't we crack jokes about Martin Luther's death?
: > 
: > Flames or comments welcomed.
:
 
Would a joke about MLK Jr Day be welcome?  This actually happened about
5 years ago when I was a senior in high school:

A bunch of my high school friends and I were sitting around one day 
talking about the upcoming vacation from school due to observance of
Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.  A particularly racist friend of mine 
was way too excited about the upcoming holdiay.  When asked if he was
happy about MLK's assassination, my friend replied:

"I only wish they'd killed 4 more niggers so we could have a whole
week off from school!"

------------
Sure am glad I don't live in the South anymore!!!!
Susan
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Wet backs 
From: altshule@skid.ps.uci.edu (Eric Altshuler)
Date: 10 Sep 92 17:37:56 GMT
Organization: University of California, Irvine

> Excuse me for asking, but what's a wet-back?

It comes from the fact that many mexicans would get into the USA
without going through immigration procedures by illeagelly (sp?)
swimming across the Rio Grande into Texas.  Hence, the name
wet-back.  Very derogatory.  Which reminds me of a joke.

Why were there 600 mexicans at the Alamo?
They only had two cars.

My roommates were both mexican and they loved it.  Sorry if I
offended anyone.  Later.
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: mgoodwin@nmsu.edu (Michael E Goodwin)
Subject: Re: Wet-Backs
Organization: NMSU Computer Science
Distribution: rec.humor
Date: Tue, 15 Sep 1992 17:09:55 GMT

jfreter writes:

> US, I did swim (well, wade is closer to the truth) across the Rio Grande.
> It flows notrh through the entire state of New Mexico. I've also sailed

	As far as I can tell, down here in Las Cruces it flows south. 
Plus down here I guess one would be considered a "wet-ankle" if
crossing it now.

Mike
From: kml@cellar.org (kml)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: NEW Woody Allen Joke
Date: 9 Sep 92 19:43:57 GMT
Organization: The Cellar BBS and public access system


A new one?! Hard to believe!

Q: What does Soon-Yi have in common with bears?












A: They both lick their paws.




       As a matter of fact, no, I don't have a life.
  kml%cellar@tredysvr.tredydev.unisys.com - My other account is a Mercedes.
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Fun with cats
From: jhsegal@wiscon.weizmann.ac.il (Livy)
Date: Thu, 3 Sep 1992 18:58:32 GMT
Organization: Weizmann Institute of Science, Computation Center

In article <1992Aug27.101714.8976@gucis.cit.gu.edu.au> dlyon@gucis.cit.gu.edu.au (Darren Lyon) writes:
>syspb@smartstar.com (Paul) writes:
>
>>Try pouring some beer in a saucer, preferably warm beer with lots of fizz.
>>Your cat will try to drink it.  Watch his reaction.
>
>>Take 4 baggies and 4 rubber bands.  Put a baggie on each of your cats
>>paws, and put the rubber band around it to hold it on (not too tight).
>>When your cat trys to walk it looks pretty funny.
>
>>Try taking a piece of fish, and putting tabasco sauce or some other
>>hot sauce on it.  Then when the cat starts begging, give it to him.
>
>>Another good trick is to get a mousetrap.  Bait the mousetrap with some
>>tuna, and set it outside.  When a nosey neighbors cat comes along,
>>he'll get a surprise.
>
>>__
>
>>Here's an old joke:
>
>>How do you make a cat sound like a dog?
>>Pour gasoline on him and light a match, Woof!
>
>Here's another good idea about cats. Wrap sticky tape around their back
>legs.
>
>OR
>
>Poke an orange peel in their face, watch them run.
>

Ok! That's enough! I ignored the FIRST idiot who wrote this kind of things
but now it begins to be a litlle annoying...VERY annoying!! What's that?
A humour newsgroup or a animal maltreatment newsgroup?? And DON'T bullshit me
that this is "only humour".There are some things which have their borders BEFORE
jokes..MUCH before;and this includes ANIMAL treatment.This list is read
by several tens of thousands of people AT LEAST,and believe me,that there
is AT LEAST some idiot somewhere which will try those horrible things.And even
if it is not true(AND I AM SURE IT IS!!),just talking about this makes me SICK.
I am reading this list for JOKES ,not for SADISTIC advices.
Go with it to the inquisition.They'll like it.|:-(
I am sorry that I HAVE to write such an article.
Thank you for reading.
Livian
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: fester@island.COM (Mike Fester)
Subject: Re: Christian Joke
Organization: /usr/local/rn/organization
Date: Wed, 9 Sep 1992 19:31:02 GMT

In article <1992Sep4.094411.12112@dartvax.dartmouth.edu> kyrie@coos.dartmouth.edu (Thomas S. Marlowe) writes:
>loon@underdog.ee.wits.ac.za (LOON M J) writes:

>>>> I was exactly referring to filth like this, anyone that can post
>>>> a joke like this, I know that the person has no morals, and is
>>>> willing to do anything to make a hit. I have heard religious jokes
>>>> but this is cynic, calculated and out right blasphomous trying to
>>>> degrade the suffering of Christ. I don't understand how all you
>>>> Christians are just sitting back and allow this kind of stuff.
>
>>If Polack jokes are allowed then this is too. I don't agree with either, 
>>though. But I think cynicism is alright. There is a difference between the
>>racial/religious cynic and the racist. This has all been cynicism. 
>
>Hmm.  Are you saying that if it is left up to 
>the individual, it is all right to cynically poke fun at
>their beliefs (since they are decided and regard a debatable issue).
>
>If this is the case, then if they ever proved
>that homosexuality was a choice and not
>genetic (*IF*) ... then it would
>be all right to cynically poke fun at "fags", 
>yes?
>
>Interesting logic; interesting conclusion.

Hell, no. I would NEVER DREAM of making the following joke:

A gay man walks in to a diner and orders a glass of milk and a slice
of pie. As all the diner currently has is lemon-merangue, that's what he
gets. To his surprise and delight, it is the BEST pie he's ever had. He 
orders another piece. The waiter shouts to the kitchen "Come again on the pie!"
The gay man smiles to himself and says "I just KNEW it"

Nope, not me. *I'd* never make that joke. Uh-uh. By gum, Mr Loon, you've really
hit the nail on the head with that one.

Mike
-- 
Disclaimer - I'm only doing what the little voices tell me to do.
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Haitians
From: dovsek@bbs.mdcbbs.com
Date: 10 Sep 92 14:52:12 GMT
Organization: IOLAB
Nntp-Posting-User: warren

In article <cm182s182.04hx@pdrome.UUCP>, cm182s182@pdrome.UUCP (Clayton Miner) writes:
> Bringing up the point about the US Coast Guard commiting acts of piracy in 
> Haitian waters leads us, I think, to the grandest American jokes of all....
>  
>     The Constitution....The Bill of Rights...and The Declaration of 
> Independance....
>  
> Sad thing is no one is laughing...neither is anyone trying to do anything to 
> restore them to meaning....
>  
 Hey Clayton, 
 I bet you'd change you're tune if just one boatload of Haitian refugees
decided to set up camp in youre back yard.
 Ask anyone who lives in Miami what the Haitian population has done to the
city. Can you spell M U R D E R  C A P I T A L.

  Life is full of realities, for most of us anyways.

Later Dude
From: dos@major.panix.com (Dave O'Shea)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Grammar
Date: Fri, 04 Sep 92 10:46:49 EDT
Organization: Hurts rent-a-dungeon, Inc.

bantolph@carina.unm.edu (Bard's are the Best) writes:

> 	IFF ENYBUDY fIKSEZ DIS DEY R HOPLES!

OH NO!!!11!!! B1FF IS BACK!???!11!?
From: ahummel@ems.cdc.com (H. Austin Hummel)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Funny Names
Date: 10 Sep 92 12:14:22 GMT
Reply-To: you@ems.cdc.com
Organization: Empros Systems International, a division of CDC

In article <1992Sep10.001958.14093@nsisrv.gsfc.nasa.gov>, wes@ian.stx.com (John S.) writes:
|> Those familiar with stock car racing know of a driver named 
|> Dick Trickle. (sp.) It's amazing to here the announcers pronounce
|> his name with nary a chuckle. 

Richard Crainium  (Disk Head)
From: che238n@vaxc.cc.monash.edu.au
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Platypus was Re: Christian Joke
Date: 7 Sep 92 09:55:03 +1000
Organization: Computer Centre, Monash University, Australia

In article <1992Sep3.181819.148660@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu>, tes0@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu (THOMAS EDWIN SCHMIDLIN) writes:
> In article <1992Sep3.021052.4548@wam.umd.edu>, ara@wam.umd.edu (Ford Prefect) wr
> ites:
>>>  If, as the Christians say, we are all created in God's image,
>>>then the very existance of this newsgroup proves that God has
>>>a sense of humor.
>>>
>>>  You don't believe me? Check out the Duck Billed Platypus. God was
>>>no doubt rolling with laughter when Charles Darwin finally saw one.
>>
>>What I want to know is, who the hell came up with the name Platypus
>>
>>I mean Kangaroo, ok, its supposed to mean "I dont know" or something
>>to that effect in Aboriginy, but Platypus?  It shure wasn't the
                    ^^^^^^^^^
                    aborigine, they now call themselves Koories.
kangaroo means "I don't understand you" or words to that effect.
Captain James Cook first saw a kangaroo at what is now Cooktown in North
Queensland. He asked a local aborigine (in english) what is was. The reply was
"kangaroo".

There is a mountain whose name is supposed to mean "your finger", ie an
explorer asked a Koorie "What is that?" (Sorry Terry P, I did not steal your
joke).


>>Aboriginys who came up with that name.  Any Auzzies want to clear this
>>up?  If there are any Aboriginys on the net, what is Platypus called
>>in your language anyway.
>>
>>If I discovered a new animal I certainly would not call it Platypus!
>>
>>-ara
>>
> 
> The existence of the platypus was first theorized by Plato, thus when it was
> discovered it was felt that his name should be part of the animals name.  In
> addition the aboriginies of Australia have been known to use the platypus as
> the New Zealanders (Kiwis) are known to use sheep, as a substitute for a
> woman.  Thus the name was originally Platopussy, but was later shortened to
> Platypus.
> 
> I hope this clears up all confusion.

Fat chance!

> -- 
> 
> 
> Tom Schmidlin       DEEP THOUGHTS: By Jack Handey - If God dwells inside
> TES0@LEHIGH.EDU         us, like some people say, I sure hope he likes
> 215-758-0865            enchiladas, cause that's what he's getting.

further comments to bruce@philosophy.wooloomooloo.oz.au

Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: A22494@waccvm.corp.mot.com (Jerry Bonanno)
Subject: SICK JOKE
Organization: Motorola
Date: 7 Sep 1992 05:57:27 MST

Q.  WHAT DO YOU CALL A ANOREXIC GIRL WITH A YEAST INFECTION?

A.  A QUARTER POUNDER WITH CHEESE


 MORE JEFF FOXWORTHY.

IF YOU RICHEST RELATIVE BUYS A HOUSE AND ASK YOU TO COME OVER AND
HELP HIM TAKE THE WHEELS OFF, YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK

IF YOUR FAMILY TREE DOES NOT FORK, YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK




Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: al@escom.com (Al Donaldson)
Subject: new DC law to stop car-jacking
Organization: ESCOM Corporation
Distribution: usa
Date: Mon, 14 Sep 1992 22:23:03 GMT

In response to an increase in violent car-jacking incidents in the DC area,
the DC City Council today passed a law to make automobile jacks illegal.
The council also passed an amendment to the bill to hold automobile
manufacturers liable for any injury or loss resulting from a car-jacking 
incident.  The city is also planning an amnesty program for drivers who 
turn in their jacks to City Hall by the end of September.

DC Mayor Sharon Pratt Kelly proclaimed this to be a great step forward 
for safety on DC's streets.  "The big problem now is all the jacks 
that people are bringing in from Virginia," she stated, referring
to the Trak Auto stores across the Potomac River that sell jacks 
without registration or requiring a waiting period.

When asked for his opinion, ex-Mayor Marion Barry continued fondling 
the breasts of one his campaign workers, then shouted "'Scuuuuse ME 
While I kiss the Skyyyyyyyyy!"

A caller to the conservative Rush Limbaugh radio talk show program
expressed his opposition to the new DC law.  "When jacks are outlawed, 
only outlaws will have jacks," he said. 

Al
From: gumby@hpopd.pwd.hp.com (Grim Reaper)
Date: Mon, 7 Sep 1992 08:53:42 GMT
Subject: Re: Sometimes
Organization: The Edge of Sanity
Newsgroups: rec.humor


 So you are from Wokingham eh?

 I guess the pub you were in was the Ship Inn....Correct??

 Gumby.


Newsgroups: rec.humor,alt.folklore.computers
From: st1ns@rosie.uh.edu (Ault, Russell W.)
Subject: Re: Thoughts
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41    
Organization: University of Houston
Date: Tue, 15 Sep 1992 02:42:00 GMT

In article <1992Sep13.191433.1@vxdesy.desy.de>, forbush@vxdesy.desy.de writes...

>Now for the funny part.......
> 
>-- 
> Mars is essentially in the same orbit... somewhat the same distance from the
> Sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals,
> we believe, and water. If there is water, that means there is oxygen. If
> oxygen, that means we can breathe.
>       -- Vice President Dan Quayle

Well, actually, there probably *is* enough oxygen on Mars to supply the provable
needs of Dan Quayle.  I suggest we send him there and find out!
From: kirkwood@qucis.queensu.ca (Scott Kirkwood)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Proctology
Date: 13 Sep 92 19:46:49 GMT
Organization: Computing & Information Science, Queen's University at Kingston

Proctologist is talking to a gynecologist:
       "You know, I was this close (separates his fingers by about an inch)
        to becoming a gynecologist."

-------------------- kirkwood@qucis.queensu.ca ----------------------
  YAAAAP - Yet Another Association Against Acronym Proliferation
Newsgroups: rec.humor