Newsgroups: soc.bi
Date: Thu, 23 Jul 1992 14:28:34 -0400 
From: "Sherrianne M. Johnson" <sj1s+@andrew.cmu.edu>
Subject: Re: 'women's' vs 'lesbian'

Excerpts from netnews.soc.bi: 22-Jul-92 'women's' vs 'lesbain' Annemarie
Succop@milton. (580)

	>to clarify my post, sometimes i am not sure how welcome i am
	>in *women's* sapce.  'women's space' is often used as a euphemism
	>for 'lesbian' space, as in, 'women's music' or sappho being a
	>'women's newsgroup'.

	>i am also sometimes not sure how welcome i am in lesbian space.
	>it is often not clear if 'lesbian' means 'vanilla only women-
	>born-women only excluively lesbian only' or what.  

	>i usually try to go places i'm comfortable & work out ways to
	>feel better about going places i want to go but may not be as
	>comfy as i want.

	>annemarie
	>asuccop@u.washington.edu

I also empathize with this feeling of rejection from the "women's camp".
 However, I have had a hard time placing, exactly, which camp the
rejections come from.  I have been criticized by a gay male for having
an inflammatory .sig ("Being bi means having the possibility of loving
anyone"--Me), since I was obviously flaunting bisexual superiority.  Not
my intent, but the hostility was there.  I have been rejected by some
lesbians I know as almost not real...like bisexuals were not real
creatures at all, but just some fragmented confused creatures.  (Ha!) 
Obviously I have been rejected by heterosexuals, although straights seem
to be pretty accepting of female bi's, anyway...

Hmm.  I'm rambling.  Anyway, don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining, as
the Russian said in _Chess_.  I am learning, albeit slowly, that I do
have a place.  I am a person, and my love/sex interests are healthy and
right for me.  My coming out process has done wonders for me.

Addressing the post that Ailsa made a while ago, I have experienced the
militaristic attitude that many lesbians have, and the backlash toward
female bisexuals (who have a link with heterosexuals,  for whom many
lesbians seem to have a very strong dislike--my reasoning alone, no one
elses :).  I do not really respect that.  In some ways, I wish that I
were the sort of person who could get involved in that sort of
sisterhood and bonding, as it were.  However, I don't really trust that.
 From what I have seen, every group of a specific type of people which
bonds together that strongly shuts out other groups of people (some of
which don't deserve it) just as strongly.  This, obviously, may not be
true in all cases, but it seems to be.   I like to be in a group of
people with common interests, but not exclusive.  

I suppose I am speaking from my experiences here at my college...there
is a group here for lesbians and bisexuals--the Lesbian/Bisexual Support
Group.  However, it is only for females--males are NOT welcome, and
would be greeted hostilely if they showed up.  Exclusive!  I felt very
unwelcome there;  all were lesbians, most were paired already, and they
all did the exact same things to be "in":  went to meetings, talked
about how badly they had been treated by the straights that week, and
then went out to a bar to get drunk.  Same music (lesbian music,
obviously), same clothes, same butch haircuts, etc.  *sigh*  The gblf
group on campus is completely separate, and I am the only female who
attends!  I am welcomed there...

Oh, boy, really rambling now.  Enough for my second post.

(Ailsa, I don't know if  I could help you much, but would be interested
in email if you like)

*slightly sad hugs to all*,

sher

Newsgroups: soc.bi,soc.motss