From: rsholmes@rodan.syr.EDU (Rich Holmes)
Subject: Re: Favorite Artist Summary
In-reply-to: lim@addvax.llnl.gov's message of 22 Dec 92 19:07:00 GMT
Organization: Syracuse University
Date: Wed, 23 Dec 92 17:17:33 EST


Hello, class. In today's Archaeology of Late 20th Century Unix
lecture, we will be examining a sig typical of the period just prior
to the Great Bandwidth Collapse of 1993. Here it is:

In article <22DEC199211072668@addvax.llnl.gov> lim@addvax.llnl.gov (Doug Lim) writes:

>| | | |     +----------------------------------------+
>| | | |     |      Doug Lim - DougLim@llnl.gov       |
>| | | |__   | Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory |
>| | |___/   |        Computer Scientist - ASD        |
>\ \____/    |    (510) 423-6019 FAX: (510)423-2419   |
> \____/     +----------------------------------------+

A couple of features to note. One is the set of four items in the last
line of the box:

    (510)         Probably indicating that this sig was purchased at a
                  five & dime store.
    423-6019      Unknown, perhaps a locker combination.
    FAX:          A reference, probably, to Fascimile, a late-20th
                  century deity who was evidently hard of hearing,
                  hence the shouting.
    (510)423-2419 Probably the access code for Mr Lim's incarnation of
                  FAX:, placed here to invite other worshippers on the
                  net to send /etc/termcap files and Rush FAQs as
                  offerings.

Next, the line above -- what does ASD mean? Well, consulting a
surviving edition of the jargon file from that period, we find that
ASD stands for "Asinine SIG Department."

Any questions at this point? Yes? Right, I was just getting to that.
The object on the left has tentatively been identified as a border
fragment, i.e. all that remains of a border that once surrounded this
sig. Here's a conjectural reconstruction:
 
         __________________________________________________
        / ________________________________________________ \
       / /  ____________________________________________  \ \
       | | | +----------------------------------------+ | | |
       | | | |      Doug Lim - DougLim@llnl.gov       | | | |
       | | | | Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory | | | |
       | | | |        Computer Scientist - ASD        | | | |
       | | | |    (510) 423-6019 FAX: (510)423-2419   | | | |
       | | | +----------------------------------------+ | | |
       | | |____________________________________________| | |
       \ \________________________________________________/ /
        \__________________________________________________/

However, Prof. Dazlizcuz of Wanker Polytechnic Institute has objected
that this fails to use the 80 columns which his research suggests was
the minimum required width of a sig, and that in fact this example
should have a *spiral* border:

          ______________________________________________________________
         / ____________________________________________________________ \
        / / __________________________________________________________ \ \
       / / / ________________________________________________________ \ \ \
      / / / / ______________________________________________________ \ \ \ \
     / / / / / ____________________________________________________ \ \ \ \ \
    / / / / / / __________________________________________________ \ \ \ \ \ \
   / / / / / / / ________________________________________________ \ \ \ \ \ \ \
  / / / / / / / /  ____________________________________________  \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \
  | | | | | | | | | +----------------------------------------+ | | | | | | | | |
  | | | | | | | | | |      Doug Lim - DougLim@llnl.gov       | | | | | | | | | |
  | | | | | | | | | | Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory | | | | | | | | | |
  | | | | | | | | | |        Computer Scientist - ASD        | | | | | | | | | |
  | | | | | | | | | |    (510) 423-6019 FAX: (510)423-2419   | | | | | | | | | |
  | | | | | | | | | +----------------------------------------+ | | | | | | | | |
  | | | | | | | | |__________________________________________________| | | | | |
  \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \______________________________________________________/ / / / /
   \ \ \ \ \ \ \________________________________________________________/ / / /
    \ \ \ \ \ \__________________________________________________________/ / / /
     \ \ \ \ \____________________________________________________________/ / /
      \ \ \ \______________________________________________________________/ / /
       \ \ \________________________________________________________________/ /
        \ \__________________________________________________________________/ /
         \____________________________________________________________________/

Magnificent, isn't it? Of course, that's how they used to build sigs
all the time back then. Nowadays we couldn't afford it.

--
*/\/\/\/\/\*     !     *"I..." - N. Peart*   *    *      / *     O   INGSI!    *
?|        |?  O  ! O   ? "YourSigIsUgly" ?  *  *  ?     // ?  _ \  _   _/-_|\  ?
*|        |*O    !O    *   - some frosh  *    *   * \\ //  * (_)/ (_) |      | ?
?|   O  O |?    O!    O? * *mcmxciibo* * ? WPI 77 ?  \X/   ?   PERTH-->*_-__/  ?
Newsgroups: alt.fan.warlord