From: dennis@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu (Thomas A. Dennis)
Subject: Re: Bike peeves
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana
Date: Wed, 14 Oct 1992 19:15:40 GMT

In <ldoj5dINNnrj@jethro.Corp.Sun.COM> geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM (Geoff 
Miller) writes:



>In article <3358@ariel.its.unimelb.EDU.AU> rab@ariel.its.unimelb.EDU.AU
>(Richard Alan Brown) writes:

>>  Peeve1: People who think all cyclists are granola head chickenshit PC
>>      lycra fetishists.(wearing Dr Scholes sandles with socks no 
>>      doubt)

>No, of course they're not all like that.  I'm not, and all the rest are.

>I've noticed an interesting phenomenon.  The lycra-fetishists in my area
>gravitate toward expensive touring bikes, the kind known as "ten speeds"
>back in the Seventies when that was the most gears any bike had.  These
>people, with their designer lycra shorts and their silly little helmets
>with dentist's mirrors on them seldom look like they're having a good
>time when they ride: they pedal determinedly along, their faces fixed in 
>grim, dour expressions.  The mountain bike people, in marked contrast,
>not only dress differently -- in cutoffs and T-shirts, or maybe *no* 
>shirts -- but they actually smile and look like they're enjoying themselves.
>This has a lot to do with the fact that the tend to be regukar folks 
>rather than PC weenies who are on edge because they're just itching to
>get  into a confrontation with an eve-ill automobile driver.

Then there's the third half... the so-called "hybrid" bikes, neither fish 
nor fowl... which, IMHO, are what most of the "regukar"[sic] folx are riding. 
Unless you actually ride in the mountains or race, a hybrid makes the most 
sense.  That's why I bought one, duh.  I dunno why mountain-bikers get such a 
charge out of jumping curbs--about all the little machines are good for in the
city--but they are quite a bit less irritating than the Lycra-clad ectomorphs 
who paint their clothes on, just in case you hadn't noticed that they had no 
body fat.

>>  Peeve2: I had the perfect opportunity to broadside a Roller last week
>>      I braked..... damn (the dumbfuck did a U-turn without looking)

>Peeve: Crypto-socialists who resent other people's prosperity.  

Nah, I don't think so.  Rollers whip around on sidewalks without looking at 
where they're going, and then have the gall to give bikers shit.  They also 
cruise around at night, wearing clothing darker than a ninja's--unlike the 
average biker, who would put a Christmas tree to shame--and give me more shit 
when, again, they almost get to shake hands with Jesus due to their own 
carelessness. Perhaps there will be ordinances passed when a few Rollers are 
cut down in the prime of life by a biker on a fast, sturdy hybrid bike.
;-) ;-)


>>  !Peeve4: cycling past a fresh half pigs head lying on the road... 

>Which half?  Details!  We must have details!

Peeve: My school, in an exceedingly rare display of wisdom and practicality, 
has bike trails running all around campus.  These are actually concrete paths 
for the express use of bikes, and are clearly marked as such, with yield signs
for pedestrian crossings, dotted yellow lines down the middle, etc.  In my 
book, these signs should indicate to the average non-developmentally-disabled 
person that IT'S A FUCKING ROAD, IDIOT.  Does that stop people from walking 
along them?  Guesses, anyone?  Even when several cyclists almost run them down
(and we do those close shaves on purpose[!peeve]), they still dance with death.

!peeve2:  On one of the paths, a couple of weeks ago, there was a chalk outline
of a body, with the caption: "SCHWINNED".  God, I hope so.

  

>Geoff


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>"I know he's some kind of great countercultural icon, but I can't listen to
>Allen Ginsberg read his poetry without thinking that that must have been what
>the Carvel Ice Cream man sounded like in his youth." -- Tom Fawcett
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--

Tom Dennis                    |  I looked into the abyss,
dennis@alexia.uiuc.edu        |    and the abyss looked into me--
tadg0614@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu     |      and we both winked.