From: seyyed@wuee1.wustl.edu (Seyyed Mahdavian)
Subject: shAhrokh, tabibe mahin!
Organization: Washington University, St. Louis Mo.
Date: Tue, 6 Oct 1992 18:49:11 GMT

Ladies and gentlemen, I proudly present shA'er, adib, filsoof, riAzi-dAn and 
mohaghegh-e mo'Aser: ostAd shAhrokh mortazavi ...
Since ostAd was in his andisheye jarf and could not post for sometime, I
consider as my duty to present a short biography of this tohfeye nAder to
new readers. He received the Ph.D. degree in adabiyyAt from Tehran U. when
he was only 15! Then he left vatane aziz for belAde ghorbat to learn more.
His work on e**(i*pi) is a classic, and he used that result to prove that
"mort", "mortuary" ... and "Amorzesh" come from the same root! An amazing
result that could "tarAvosh" only from "maghze fakoure ostAd". He later
experienced some residence problem due to his extensive knowledge and 
intelligence. He wrote: "...I am dar sharafe(!) ekhrAj az AmrikA ...".
Thanks God, estekbAre jahAni didn't succeed to expel him, and here again
sham'e vojoudash roshanAyi bakhshe mahfele mAst!
Dear ostAd, I was just reading one of your previous shAhkAr-e adabiyyAt:

> doosh dar halgheye maa ghesseye geesooye to bood
>                          daam daaraam raam deem daaraam raam daaree raam
> 
> can anyone help me with the second beyt?   if you cant, take your
> best shot anyway... noke zabooname... (hey, there's a challenging idea!
> lets provide first or second beyts, and have SCI shaa'ers complete them!).
> 
> many thanks...

bah bah, alhagh ke bah bah. rahmat be oun shir. rahmat be oun bAghebouni ke
derakhteto kAsht. rahmat be oun hizom shekan ...

shAhrokh Amad-o sabbAbeye sa'di be dahan
                                ke to bordi ze kafam masnade ostAde sokhan

But it's a tragedy, a disaster in our community that such an ostAd lost his 
second "beyt" (i.e. house) and no body found it for him! Is this "dastet
dard nakoneh" after all those years of "khedmate sAdeghAneye bi vaghfeh"?
Even at this level, ostAd never stops "mazAh gouyi", and he presents his
problem in such a manner as if he doesn't remember the second mesra' of
a beyt she'r!!! Dear ostAd, believe me, we are going to do our best to find 
the nAto guy who stole your beyt, and I personally will give him one of my 
special lifetime warranty lessons!
Now back to your kind tebAbat for mahin, I don't think that your diagnosis
is correct. She doesn't need help in "language". After all,

kal agar tabib boudi         sare khod davA nomoudi

But she still needs your help. You see, I was wondering what's wrong with
this female; even if she had eaten "maghze khar", she wouldn't behave like 
this. Now I think that I have a working theory; she needs a husband !!!

in zabAne harzeh rA taghsir nist      darde bi darmAne ou bi-shoharist!

Other animals also have similar strange behaviour when it's time for pairing.
So my suggestion is that you ask her to marry you! I am serious. Don't be so
shy, because there are lots of other koor-o-kar-o-cholAgh-o-kachal who are 
potential candidates, and if you delay, you might loose this incredible 
opportunity.  So be self confident, don't panic, wear your best suit, don't 
forget atr-o-odkolon, buy her ye joft kafsh, az oun kafshAye melli-o ... and 
ask: ... hAlA rAzi shodi ?

Seyyed.
Newsgroups: soc.culture.iranian