From: rdonahue@spdcc.com (Bob Donahue)
Subject: Re: Private antidiscrimination policies in CO
Organization: insert anything here
Date: Fri, 1 Jan 1993 04:37:57 GMT

anderson@macc.wisc.edu (Jess Anderson) writes:
>>>As Bob Donahue
>>>quite calmly remarked, it's put-up or shut-up time, buddy.

>>What exactly do you want me to "put up"?  Nothing, from what
>>I can see.

>I believe he had very specific suggestions about writing
>letters.  But I believe it's "nothing you can see," too.

	Let's get the list out here...

	So far I have asked Walter to:

	1) borrow the book "Heather Has Two Mommies" from the library
and read it so he can form a first-hand opinion on it.

	2) go to the GBLO*-bookstore in Denver and pick up more reading
material so that he can get some better insight into what is going 
on in the real world.

	3) call the offices in Denver and protest against CO:2

	4) write letters as in 3)

	5) do the "wear something obviously gay" thing to experience
what it's like to have passive oppression (or maybe if he's *lucky*
active oppression, so that he'll have his first-hand-experience)
foisted upon him.

	6) canvass his neighborhood with repeal-2 leaflets or
a petition for a recall or revote on the issue

	7) write a letter to the paper in Colorado Springs to the effect of 6)

	8) start working within HP to have the EE statement be more
than empty words in a footnote...  I've even written the letter for
him...

	He has done none of these things.  Well, I'm assuming he has done
none, becauseI believe that if he had he would have said so.  Also
if he had he wouldn't be saying the sort of things he *is* saying
at this time.

	I think he suffers from "impersonal terminalism" --- he can't
quite grok that there are people at the other end of the modem.
I mean he *knows* there are people there, but we're still hypothetical,
or virtual, or whateer.

	I'm supposed to be in CO in June (being VERY VERY careful where
I spend $$$) --- I'm really tempted to look him up while I'm there
just to give him the full 3-D effect.  My huinch is that he will
have a LOT harder time playing "bait the homo" when the homo is there
staring him in the face...  I mean it's not like he's an active homophobe
or anything --- he just has a mental block seeing it from outside the
Walterocentric universe --- maybe if I drag him along to some places
he might get a better indication of where reality sits...  Hell, when
I WANTED to come out I had a hard enough time meeting gay people!
Perhaps his gaydar is just not there at all, and what he needs most
is a real-life tourguide...

	One thing that keeps running thru all of this stuff, is that
he doesn't get the concept of "non-heterocentric space".  I mean
EVEN HERE, we're still supposed to *provide* the information, and
*provide* the rationalization, where in principle, it's supposed
to be the other way around.  Certainly the straight people who
post here often (and are much beloved) do so in that frame of mind.
Anyway, this means that our indignation at having our space invaded
is read as hostility, our stating the game rules are read as coercion,
our refusing to give into the heterocentricism is read as admission
of guilt, etc.  

	I for one would LOVE to be around the day that the clouds
 are lifted from his eyes and he suddenly "understands" what it
is we're saying and why we're saying it...  I think that everyone
goes thru this several times in their lives at different levels.
And sometimes it's a long slow process... certainly the womyn here
could testify that some/most/all of the men are still "getting it"
with respect to sexism and misogyny both within and without this group!
This isn't a plea that we should back off and go easy, not at all,
this is our home.  I guess it's just a train of though (with not enough
dessert cars!)...

	I think it's time to go attack the hubby-bear...

BBC