From: laiichung@vtcc1.cc.vt.edu (L. D. ROPER)
Newsgroups: soc.culture.taiwan
Subject: desperate depression
Date: 16 Aug 92 19:10:00 GMT
Organization: Virginia Tech, Blacksburg, Virginia
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41


     My uncle-in-law is a Chinese ( He claimed to be ) . He came to Taiwan
     when he was 5 with his parents . After finishing his bachlor degree in
     NTU , he came to States to pursue his graduate study . Then he met with
     my aunt ( a native Taiwanese studied abroad ) , fell in love and settle
     themselves in USA . His father deseased in 1983 in Taiwan with the hope
     that he can visit his mother ( my uncle-in-law's grandmother ) but could
     never accomplished . My uncle-in-law said about his family : His father
     is a Chinese but can never come back , He thinks himself as a Chinese but
     he felt so remote from the real China when he visited China in 1984 ( with
     a USA visa ) . He has lived in Taiwan for 20 years but felt as a outsider
     for all his grown up years . Now , his two daughters who are 23 and 27 
     are Americans . He said his generation Chinese seemed to keep running :
     run away from Japan's invansion , run away from communists , run away from
     Taiwan because they are afraid of communists would come again and fear 
     that Taiwanese would kick their butt if Taiwanese holds power .
     My another uncle-in-law is a native Taiwanese lived in USA also . His 
     father died during the " white terror " period in 50' . He also went to
     States to study then got a Ph.d in Mechanical Engineering and landed here.
     Because of his continuing criticizing KMT goverment , he was on the Black
     List ( I don't know if he is still in that list or not ) . Which makes him
     can't go back to Taiwan even his mother deceased . His kids also consider
     themselves as Americans . He told me one day about his grown up : His moma
     told him again and again of not staying in Taiwan because she couldn't be
     sure one day KMT would jail or kill her son for no reason . She has lost
     her husband and she didn't want it happen again to her sons . He joked 
     with a little sadiness : His father was taught that he was a Japanese but
     fight against them . He was taught that he is a Chinese but run away from
     them . Now his kids consider themselves as Americans without hesitation .
     It seems his family is also keeping running .
     I always felt something blocking my throat when I thought about this . Now
     this happened again to my cunsine . He is a strong TI supportor , now he 
     falls in love with one girl from China ( Beijing ) . But politics seems 
     work again . His Chinese girlfriend can't take the strange eyesight from
     other Chinese ( To make a couple with a TIer ! ) and Taiwanese ( What did
     she want from Taiwan ? ) . He also beared a great pressure from his family
     and his collegues ( Chinese ? the murder of your father ! Would this be his
     barrier of his political claim ? ) 
     Great depression , will this never end ? I don't know . Living in America
     or other country where they are strangers to everybody maybe a resolution
     they can best choose .

                                                                  I Chung Lai