From: osmith@acorn.co.uk (Owen Smith)
Newsgroups: soc.bi
Subject: Re: Who am I anyway?
Date: 26 Aug 92 15:27:43 GMT
Organization: Acorn Computers Ltd, Cambridge, England

In article <1992Aug25.091823.672@usenet.ins.cwru.edu> ptd2@po.CWRU.Edu
(Palmer T. Davis) writes:

>Okay, let's face it: gender dysphoria is Not Fun.  And it can be *highly*
>Not Fun if you let it.  But no matter what winds up being ``right'' for
>you, things don't stay this bad indefinitely.  You either wind up living
>as a woman (either via cross-dressing or reconstructive surgery), or you
>eventually reach some sort of an accomodation.  In the mean time, it is
>trivial for this to wreak havoc with the rest of your life, and you can't
>let it.

It's done a large amount of damage to my life already. Things could
definitely get a lot worse though (eg. I have a job, a car and a tuba).

>That being said, I do understand that this isn't exactly something that 
>you can turn off.  Just remember that it does get easier.  And it helps
>if you aren't doing this alone.  Whom (other than the entire net) have you
>discussed this with?  And where in the UK do you live?  There may be a
>group near you.

I live in Cambridge, which being a small town dominated by the University
means that the only likely group is a University one, which is going to
be around for approximately half of the year. Sigh. I could go to London,
but I hate the place. Too big, too crowded, too dirty.

>>Interestingly enough I'm not just interested in the classic ultra feminine
>>clothes that most tranvestites seem to wear. Yes they're fine for the right
>>occasion, but I want to be a woman in jeans and T-shirt too.
>
>Yes!  Exactly!  Actually, that was one of the points that got me to back 
>out the week before I was going to go full time.  While I look pretty good
>(or did before I gained about thirty pounds) and have no trouble passing
>(or didn't when I was in practice) when I get dressed up, I have real trouble
>if I don't.  Getting through the day eventually took so much energy that
>I couldn't tell any more whether that was what I wanted or something that
>I was forcing myself to do.  But there's a relatively lengthy core dump
>in there that I'll avoid inflicting on everyone right now.

I know what you mean. If I need to wear lots of makeup to pass, it really is
going to be a lot of effort to live full time or nearly full time. If it
gets to the point where it's causing more problems that it is solving, then
it obviously isn't right. But I haven't been there yet, so I don't know how
things will work out for me.     

>This whole discussion is really fodder for alt.tvts, not soc.bi.  Has anyone 
>seen D'Glenn recently?  He was making noises about starting such a group;
>someone should go ahead and newgroup the thing.  Followups on this last 
>point to alt.config....

Please make that soc.tvts not alt.tvts. UKNet (the UK internet provider)
is very keen on censoring alt. For instance we don't get any of the
alt.sex groups, we don't get alt.binaries.pictures.sex or .tasteless,
we don't get alt.polyamory, alt.lycra or alt.drugs. These are just the
ones I'm aware of. The scheme seems to be that if it looks at all dubious
and it's in alt then censor it. I'm pretty certain alt.tvts would be
censored. Besides, I hang out here. Why should I have to walk down the
road and talk to another bunch of people I don't know?

Owen
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