From: bs@faron.mitre.org (Robert D. Silverman)
Subject: Ghastly
Organization: Research Computer Facility, MITRE Corporation, Bedford, MA
Date: Fri, 17 Apr 1992 10:47:37 GMT


Here are the full hands from the queries I posted. On one of those
hands I reversed the protagonists. On the 1NT Dble hand, the bad
team opened 1NT and I was the one who doubled. See the result below.




Last night my team LOST a match to 4 of the worst potzers you have ever seen.
[although my teammates did not play well either].

I have some ghastly stories to tell.

Hand 1:

	AKxx
	AKxxxxx
	J
	x

Q10x			xxx
x			QJ10x
xxx			xx
A10xxxx			Kxx

	J9x
	x
	AKQxxxx
	QJ

None. Our table:

1D  3C  3H  4C
4D  P   4S   P
P(1) P				I tanked FOREVER before passing.
				I'm not sure it is right.
				I figured 4S was easier than 5D. 
				Note that partner could be 6-5.
				He was looking for a diamond slam
				and did not expect me to pass.


2 rounds of clubs, partner pitched and did not ruff. Now came a
diamond switch. Not believing that spades were 3-3 partner went down
1.

Other table:

1D  P   1H  P
1NT P   4H

Can you believe this auction??? Lose 10 Imps.
How can responder simply sign off in 4H????




Board 2.  Red vs. Not. My partner and I held:

xxx
Qx
QJ9xxxx
x

Axxx
Kxx
Ax
A10xx

Our auction:

My Rho   Me   LHO   part
1C      1NT    2H   2NT(Lebensohl)
P       3C     P    3D

At the other table out hands got to 3NT and MADE because the K diamonds
was STIFF.  (lose 10 IMPS)
 
(3)  All red.

	x
	AJ10x
	xxx
	AKxxx

Kxx			Axxxxxx
Kxxx			Qx
AQxxx			Kxx
x			x

	Qx
	xxx
	xx
	Qxxxxx

Our table:

Part   RHO    Me    LHO
1C     4S     5C    Dble!!!
 
Is 4S ridiculous or what??
Isn't the double even worse???


Other table:

1C    2S    P    3S
all pass.		

You can argue that maybe they should raise to 4S at the other table,
but that does not diminish the ridiculous auction at out table.

Lose 10 Imps.
 
 
(4) All Red.

	xx
	J10x
	AK9x
	J1062

Qxxxx		Jxx
Qxx		Axx
J10xxx		x
-		AQ98xx

	AK10
	K98x
	Qxx
	K7x

Our table.

LHO   Part.   RHO   Me.
 P     P      3C    3NT

Down 1 on a spade lead. A wins, diamond to table, heart hook. Q wins,
exit with heart to Ace, spade.  

At the other table the contract was the same on a different auction.
My less than wonderful teammate got out with the J diamonds upon
winning the Q hearts.   Lose 13 IMPS.

And the hand of the night:


	AKQxxxx
	AKxxxx
	-
	-

Jx			10xx
x			Jx
xxxxx			AKQx
xxxxx			AQJx

	x
	Q109x
	J109x
	K10xx

At our table it went (believe it or not!)

RHO   Me   LHO    Part
1NT   P     P     6S(1)
Dbl   7C(2) Dble  7H
Dbl   Rdble   float

(1) 2D here would show a major two suiter but partner did not want
    to take ANY chance that I might pass with a weak hand and long
    diamonds.

The double of 6S is clearly idiotic. How can the 6S bidder not have 12
tricks??

Now came my problem. What was partner's hand?? I finally
decided he was something like 9-4  or 8-5 with an unspecified
second suit. How else can he have 12 tricks? If that was the case
I wanted to play 7 of his second suit.  

My first instinct was to redouble, because my partner does not
bid 6S here without 12 tricks in hand. But then I thought that
7 of something might be cold. RHO was probably doubling on 2 aces
that were void in partner's hand.  So I pulled to 7C, expecting
partner to bid his "smaller" suit. When I found out it was hearts,
the redouble stood out a mile.

Note: The people at the table said I took  7 minutes to make the 7C call.

At the other table the bidding (if you call it that) went:

1NT  P   3C(1)  4C
5C   P    P     6C
P    6H   P     7H
Dble

(1) weak minor two-suiter.

I agree with everything up to 6H, but don't believe 7H was justified.
Partner could have held xxx in hearts and a stiff spade. However,
they guessed right.

The Dble was idiotic [but was intended as Lightner for a diamond
rather than a club]. However, partner may safely assume the opponents
have a club void and will not lead it.  Even still, my brain-damaged
teammate should realize that dummy has 13 cards in the majors.
 
How can the 6H bidder NOT redouble with Q109x?????????

(6)

	xxx
	Jxx
	J10xxx
	Qx


xxx		AKJx
K10xxx		Qxxx
xx		AQx
xxx		xx

	Qxx
	A
	Kxx
	AKJ109x

RHO   Me   LHO   Partner
1NT   Dble  P     P
rdble P    2H    P
P    3C    P     P
3H

Can you believe this? I make a penalty double. Dummy sits and does
not rescue in hearts. So the NT bidder rescues himself. [They have
NO runout agreements. The NT bidder just decided to do it himself
even though partner showed tolerance to play there].   He then
raises to 3H!!!!

At the other table:

1NT  Dble  2H   P
P    3C   all float.

Lose 3 IMPS.  3H makes (-140)  3C down 1.



Between some ridiculous auctions, some ridiculous contracts,
and lousy play by my teammates we lost this match. [By 6 IMPS].

The opponents were so bad as to defy description.

--
Bob Silverman
These are my opinions and not MITRE's.
Mitre Corporation, Bedford, MA 01730
"You can lead a horse's ass to knowledge, but you can't make him think"