HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: hoffmann@infopls.chi.il.us (Robert Hoffmann)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: This just in - at your bookstore...
Date: Wed, 12 Aug 92 10:25:24 CDT
Organization: INFOPLUS support, Wheeling, IL

"The Dan Quayle Diktionary", Berkley Publishing, paper, $4.95
 
A slight bit of overkill based on the POTATO(E) flap... what is 
frightening is that DQ could actually THINK like that...
 
From the cover: "I'm only a heartbeet away!"
 
The introduction (by "Murfy Browne"): (paraphrased) "Murfy Browne is a 
fictional character... So is this dictionary.  Incredibly, J. Danforth 
Quayle isn't." (I have to get the exact quote, sorry...)
 
It's worth a look... in the bookstore where I work, we've put it next to 
"Bushisms" and Tony Hendra's "Born to Run Things" psuedo-biography of 
George Herbert Hoover Herschel Walker Burning Bush.

--
hoffmann@infopls.chi.il.us (Robert Hoffmann)
Infoplus BBS, +1 708 537 0247, v32bis. Home of Infoplus.
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: coolidge@speaker.wpd.sgi.com (Don Coolidge)
Subject: Re: The CULTURAL ELITE
Organization: Silicon Graphics, Inc.
Date: Mon, 17 Aug 92 19:33:36 GMT

In article <petersob.8.713838539@uwec.edu>, petersob@uwec.edu (Brent Peterson) writes:
|> 
|> I think in the context of Dan Qualye's original Family Values speech, it 
|> means the movie-makers, journalists, and network news anchors.  Qualye's 
|> point was that these Elitists are influencing rather than reflecting what is 
|> really happening in society.  This is evident today by looking at how the 
|> media blatantly accepts the democrats while shunning all the republican 
|> politicians.  Hollywood also makes the inner city's seem like warzones and 
|> depicts men sleeping around on their wifes as normal.  
|> 
|> Brent Peterson
|> petersob@uwec.edu

It's been a busy weekend in my favorite newsgroup!

Since there was no smiley appended to this little item, I won't
insult Brent by assuming one. Lord knows it needed one, though.

So, what exactly does it *say*?

Let's see, there's a bit of prattle about moviemakers, journalists,
and network news anchors being Elitists who blatantly accept Democrats
and shun Republicans. Presumably William F. Buckley (my personal 
favorite bete noir) is therefore somehow not among the elite - I'm
sure he'll be crushed. George Will, John McLaughlin, Novak and Evans -
nope, not Elite. Dan Rather, outside of getting his ass kicked by
Bush in '88, is definitely beyond the pale of the Elite. Arnold 
Schwarzenegger. Clint Eastwood. All of Disney Studios. Ted Koppel.
The entire editorial staff of USA Today.

I dunno, Brent, seems to me that you've overgeneralized yourself
into an untenable position. I realize that it's also Danny's, but
that's something we've all come to love about and expect from him.

If, on the other hand, your comment about the media was intended to
point out that some of them have finally taken off their blinders 
and are at last willing to call a spade a spade, a recession a 
recession, and a capital-gains tax cut a bad idea, well, then I
applaud your perspicacity and invite you to "...just look at the
record...". (Really good political advice knows no party and never
goes out of style.)

As for inner city's (sic) being warzones, I'm sure downtown
Boise and Bellingham are charming places. But perhaps you might
consider a stroll through Bedford-Stuyvesant in New York, or 
South-Central Los Angeles, or...but just do it during the daytime,
please, and don't blame me for the consequences.

As for men sleeping around on their wifes (sic), whether
you agree with what you see portrayed or not, perhaps you 
might read some literature like _The Kinsey Report_ before
you jump to any rash conclusions as to what is and is not
normal. (Whether or not it's desirable is an entirely different
question, especially in these deadly days of HIV...) 

Humph. Not a lot for me to poke fun at. Oh, well...:-(

On the other hand, we are facing Four More Years, unless
people who hold such opinions wake up and smell the bullshit.

Don Coolidge
Xref: sparky alt.fan.dan-quayle:2398 alt.politics.bush:1331 alt.politics.clinton:1797
From: howie@athena.mit.edu (Howard D Lewis)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle,alt.politics.bush,alt.politics.clinton
Subject: Re: The Republicans are confusing me again...
Date: 13 Aug 92 05:00:31 GMT
Organization: Massachusetts Institute of Technology

In article <1992Aug13.034255.3899@athena.mit.edu> dks@athena.mit.edu (dks) writes:
>
>Friends!
>
>It's happening again: Republican logic is once more too much for my
>feeble mind.  
>
>When anti-choice Democratic Governor Casey and his fellow believers
>were not given a chance to speak at the Democratic Convention last
>month, we were told that the Democrats were afraid to face the issue.
>Never mind that the anti-choice movement subsumed only about fifteen
>percent of the delegates elected to the Democratic Convention, they
>should have been given a chance to speak out, we were told.
>
>[Cut to Houston, barely a month later.]
>
>The Republican platform now calls for a Constitutional Amendment that
>would ban *all* abortions, even in cases of rape and incest.  More
>than *fifty-five* percent of the delegates elected to the Republican
>Convention disagree with this position.  How many of these dissenters
>will be allowed to speak to the Convention?  You guessed it: NONE!


 Governor Bill Weld of Massachussetts will be speaking at the Republican 
 convention.  He is rather solidly pro-choice.  This is better than
 the Democrats which allowed no one to speak on pro-life issues.


>Could it be that it is the *Republicans* who are afraid to face the
>abortion issue?  Of course not!
>
>
>Dhanesh
>
>Just Say Noe to Sex with Pro-Lifers!
>
Organization: Senior, Math/Computer Science, Carnegie Mellon, Pittsburgh, PA
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Date: Thu, 20 Aug 1992 17:05:30 -0400 
From: Nanci Ann Miller <nm0w+@andrew.cmu.edu>
Subject: Re: Double messages on abortion
	<19AUG92175701@adcalc.fnal.gov>
Distribution: world

glass@adcalc.fnal.gov (Michael Glass) writes:
> 
>      Fear not that the future will bring us President Quayle.  A country
> which elected Ronald Reagan twice as its leader could probably elect a
> putrid rutabaga, but it would have to be a *likeable* putrid rutabaga.
> Dan Quayle took a whole lot more heat as a result of his public "slip" on
> abortion than Barbara Bush did.  I really think that we have little to
> worry about from Quayle.
> 
> -- Michael Glass
>    glass@adcalc.fnal.gov

Famous last words....

Nanci


There's this succession of infinitely diminishing Republicans, starting
with Reagan.  Everybody said we can't impeach Reagan 'cause we'd just get
Bush, and everybody says we hope nothing happens to Bush 'cause we'll get
Quayle, and then when Quayle gets in ... it's fascinating to imagine
somebody Quayle can pick for his running mate who would cause us to say we
can't impeach Quayle, we'd only get you-know-who.

Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: williams@herky.cs.uiowa.edu (Kent Williams)
Subject: Really Bad Joke, BEWARE
Date: Thu, 20 Aug 1992 16:28:01 GMT
Organization: University of Iowa, Iowa City, IA, USA

My Wife told me this joke, so no flames about sexism.  If you don't like
humor of a sexual nature DON'T READ PAST THE FOLD

I warned you!

Q: Why did Hilary Clinton shave her pubes?
A: So she could pull up her dress and say "READ MY LIPS, NO MORE BUSH!"
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: cindy@solan10.solan.unit.no (Cynthia Kandolf)
Subject: Re: Does anyone have Transcript of today's CNN Interview
Organization: /home/ludviga/cindy/.organization
	<By8qPB2w164w@mintir.new-orleans.la.us>
Date: 21 Aug 92 19:51:02

Edward J. Branley writes:
goldsman@CC.GATECH.EDU (Mike Goldsman) writes:

> the message says it all.. From Mitch Cohen's posting
> it looks like it was pretty funny.
>
> Dan Quayle '94!!
>
>
> If anyone got it on tape, please type it in and post it or mail
> it to me...
>
> -Mike
>
--- GNUS: alt.fan.dan-quayle{2600} 0(+98) more
(Article)----Top------------In-reply-to:
elendil@mintir.new-orleans.la.us's message of 19 Aug 92 12:45:22 G\MT
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: Does anyone have Transcript of today's CNN Interview
        <By8qPB2w164w@mintir.new-orleans.la.us>
Distribution:
--text follows this line--
Edward J. Branley writes:





goldsman@CC.GATECH.EDU (Mike Goldsman) writes:

> the message says it all.. From Mitch Cohen's posting
> it looks like it was pretty funny.
>
> Dan Quayle '94!!
>
>
> If anyone got it on tape, please type it in and post it or mail
> it to me...
>
> -Mike
>
--- GNUS: alt.fan.dan-quayle{2600} 0(+98) more
(Article)----Top------------In-reply-to:
elendil@mintir.new-orleans.la.us's message of 19 Aug 92 12:45:22 G\MT
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: Does anyone have Transcript of today's CNN Interview
        <By8qPB2w164w@mintir.new-orleans.la.us>
Distribution:
--text follows this line--
Edward J. Branley writes:
>goldsman@CC.GATECH.EDU (Mike Goldsman) writes:
>
>> the message says it all.. From Mitch Cohen's posting
>> it looks like it was pretty funny.
>>
>> Dan Quayle '94!!
<deletia>
>Actually, Dano may be working on a different level.  "Let's see, when
we get
>creamed in November, maybe I can run for a House or Senate seat in '94..."

Nah, i know what's going on.  Poor Danny is confused, and it's all
the IOC's fault.  See, until this year both the summer and the
winter Olympics occured in US Presidential election years.  Now
the two Olympics will be occuring in different years, and Danny
can't remember which one will be occuring in the same year as
the election.

After all, Republicans must be interested in sports.  Why else did
Mary Lou Retton get to introduce GHWB at the Ecumenical Breakfast
("Cheerleading for Christianity")?

If he is interested in sports, however, i hope he has the sense to
stay away from Lillehammer in '94.  After his behavior at King Olav's
funeral, he can hardly expect a warm reception....

-Cindy Kandolf
 cindy@solan.unit.no
 Trondheim, Norway

Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: stephen@def.bae.co.uk (Stephen Paynter)
Subject: Re: A Joke on BBC Radio 4 (repost)
Reply-To: stephen@def.bae.co.uk
Organization: British Aerospace (Dynamics) Ltd
Date: Wed, 19 Aug 92 13:14:54 GMT

Sorry about re-posting this. However, nobody responded the first time and I was not
sure if that was because no-one received it, or if it was because it was un-utterably boring. If the latter, my profuse apologises.

In article 12745@def.bae.co.uk, stephen@def.bae.co.uk (Stephen Paynter) writes:
>Hi everyone,
>
>	I heard this joke while driving into work five minutes ago on BBC Radio 4
>(in England):
>
>	"The most frightening sentence in the English language just has to be: 
>'Dan, I don't feel so well'.
>
>
>Sorry if it's an old one.
>
>The thought of Danny ending up as president puts new fervor into the prayer: 'God
>Bless America'!
>
>
>---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
>Stephen Paynter.
>I speak only for myself, but I'm not always serious.
>---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Stephen Paynter.
Not sure if the world is really out-there (I've read to much philosophy!!)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: sysmatt@aix3090b.uky.edu (Matt Simpson)
Subject: Re: Quayle for President
    <2A8A94F4.16784@noiro.acs.uci.edu> <1992Aug14.171854.27051@sco.COM> 
    <1992Aug16.051131.19162@u.washington.edu> <86375@netnews.upenn.edu>
Organization: University Of Kentucky, Dept. of Math Sciences
Date: Tue, 18 Aug 1992 08:05:21 GMT

weemba@sagi.wistar.upenn.edu (Matthew P Wiener) writes:
>>Alright already!!!!! What was the joke?

>It was something about what black people really want: loose women, tight
>shoes, and warm bathroom seats.  Or something like that.  It wasn't even
>funny, unlike the joke that got Watt fired.
>-- 
Actually, you've got it backwards. I read 3 versions of the joke, in
3 different newspapers. Basically, Butz said the republicans couldn't get
the black vote because blacks were only interested in 3 things:

 Version 1 -- delicately paraphrased:
  comfortable shoes, good sex, and a warm place to go to the bathroom

 Version 2 -- a slightly more daring newspaper -- verbatim but deleted
  loose shoes, a tight *****,  and a warm place to ****

 Version 3 -- from our student newspaper which felt no need to delete
  expletives
  loose shoes, a tight pussy, and a warm place to shit


So it was the shoes that should be loose, and ..... oh well
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: cortez@milton.u.washington.edu (Tom Warner)
Subject: Re: Confirmation of Bush Quotation
Organization: University of Washington, Seattle
Date: Sun, 16 Aug 1992 07:32:36 GMT

In article <l8ru9mINNjcd@girtab.usc.edu> rone@girtab.usc.edu (Ron Echeverri) writes:
>In article <1992Aug15.202517.4217@athena.mit.edu> njblock@athena.mit.edu (Ned Block) writes:
>>Hi.  I just read in somebody's sig. a Bush quotation which seemed extremely
>>outrageous to me, even for a person as rediculous as *him* to have said.  I
>>was just wondering if anybody knew anything about it, such as where and when
>>he said it, or even if he *did* say it, or if the whole thing is just made up.
>>Here's the quote:
>> "I don't know that atheists should be considered citizens, nor should they be
>>considered patriots.  This is one nation under God."
>>			-President George Bush
>
>He shore did say this.  Let me scrounge up the file from my archives...
>
>     President Bush made the comments during a campaign stop on August 27,
>     1988 at O'Hare airport.  He spoke with Robert Sherman, chief spokesman
>     for American Atheists:
>
>     RS: "Mr. President, what will you do to win the votes of Americans
>          who are Atheists?"
>
>     GB: "I guess I'm pretty weak in the atheist community.  Faith in
>          God is pretty important to me."
>
>     RS: "Surely you recognize the equal citizenship and patriotism of
>          Americans who are atheists?"
>
>     GB: "No, I don't know that atheists should be considered as citizens,
>          nor should they be considered patriots.  This is one nation under
>          God."
>
>     UPI reported on May 8, 1989 that various atheist organizations were still
>     angry over the remarks.
>
>     The exchange appeared in the Boulder Daily Camera on Monday Feb 27,
>     1989.
>
I wonder how hard Bush would take it if we told him the "under God"
part wasn't in the original version of the Pledge of Allegiance.

After all, wasn't it written by some American Marxist in the 1890s?

Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: scotts@CS.CMU.EDU (Scott Safier)
Subject: Re: Danny on abortion
Date: Wed, 12 Aug 92 19:28:46 GMT
Organization: School of Computer Science, Carnegie Mellon University
Originator: scotts@MORPHEUS.CIMDS.RI.CMU.EDU

In article <1992Aug9.161740.14707@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu> scasburn@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu (Steven M Casburn) writes:

   I'm new on the net, so forgive me if you've heard this logic before:

   A) Dan Quayle thinks abortion is murder
   B) Dan Quayle said he would support his daughter if she got an abortion.

   C) Therefore, Dan Quayle would stand by his daughter even if she murdered his 
   grandchild.

   Now there's family values for you!
   Cheers!

And Georgie agrees with Dan's values, except it is OK for Georgie's
granddaughter to kill his great granddaughter.  Well, at least the
republican are being consistently inconsistent.

Scott
Organisation: European Space Technology Centre (E.S.T.E.C)
Date: Friday, 14 Aug 1992 13:31:58 CET
From: Hugh D.R. Evans <HEVANS@ESTEC.BITNET>
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: The Republicans are confusing me again...
 <1992Aug13.034255.3899@athena.mit.edu> <7+=yptg@rpi.edu>
 <2A8A9589.16893@noiro.acs.uci.edu>

In article <2A8A9589.16893@noiro.acs.uci.edu>, jdooley@maemaster.eng.uci.edu
(John R. Dooley) says:
>
>In article <7+=yptg@rpi.edu> blythes@cs.rpi.edu (Stephen Blythe) writes:
>>
>>Republican Logic ?????
>>
>>Can you say PARADOX ???
>>
>Yep, and I can say OXYMORON too.
>

Ok, I'll bite:  Is Bush the Ox or the Moron, and is Quayl the other?

Hugh

   Standard Disclaimer...    * Inet:   hevans@estwm8.dnet.estec.esa.nl
                             *     or  hevans@estec.esa.nl
"The road to nowhere is      * SPAN:   ESTCS1::HEVANS
    shorter than you think"  * BITNET: HEVANS@ESTEC
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle,talk.bizarre,alt.elvis.sighting
From: osa@wilbur.unh.edu (Oktay S. Ahiska)
Subject: Re: Dan Quayle
Followup-To: alt.fan.dan-quayle
X-Advertisement: Use Emacs
Organization: Springfield Elementary School
Distribution: na
Date: Sat, 15 Aug 1992 19:16:22 GMT
Comments: Cinderella married for money

"Rob" == Rob Dobson <rwd4f@poe.acc.Virginia.EDU> writes:

Rob> DAN QUAYLE IS THE ANTI-ELVIS!!!

I thought Michael J. Fox was the Anti-Elvis...

--
oktay ahiska, dept. of cs, unh, durham nh, 03824 
the opinions expressed above are solely my own. i don't represent unh. 
and here's the last five. it's educational. it's educational. 
it's educational.  it's educational. it's educational.
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle,alt.politics.bush,alt.politics.clinton
From: blythes@cs.rpi.edu (Stephen Blythe)
Subject: Re: The Republicans are confusing me again...
Date: Thu, 13 Aug 1992 14:13:51 GMT

In article <1992Aug13.034255.3899@athena.mit.edu>, dks@athena.mit.edu (dks) writes:
|> 
|> Friends!
|> 
|> It's happening again: Republican logic is once more too much for my
|> feeble mind.  
|> 

Republican Logic ?????

Can you say PARADOX ??? 

(Moreover, can you spell it? ;-) )

-steve

  ==================================================================
  Stephen A. Blythe                |    RPI
  Dept. of Computer Science        |  "where Hell has finally
  Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute |      thawed out ..."
  blythes@sirius.cs.rpi.edu        |
  ==================================================================

 My views do not necessarily reflect those of the bozos surrounding me.

				"NO MORE
			       BU__ SH__"
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle,alt.politics.bush,alt.politics.clinton
From: dks@athena.mit.edu (dks)
Subject: Re: The Republicans are confusing me again...
Organization: MIT, Cambridge, Massachusetts, USA.
Date: Thu, 13 Aug 1992 06:02:44 GMT

In article <1992Aug13.050031.7745@athena.mit.edu>,
howie@athena.mit.edu (Howard D Lewis) writes:
> Governor Bill Weld of Massachussetts will be speaking at the Republican 
> convention.  He is rather solidly pro-choice.

Yes, and Secretary of Labor Lynn Martin who will be making the nominating
speech is also pro-choice.  The trouble is that NEITHER of them will be
saying one word about abortion or choice in their speeches.  Are you
arguing that their mere presence should give comfort to the 55% of the
Republican Convention delegates who want their party platform changed?
If so, it would seem that Republicans are easier to please than I have
come to believe.  Perhaps their standards are lower this year?


> This is better than the Democrats which allowed no one to
> speak on pro-life issues.

On the contrary, it's worse: as I said before, 55% of the delegates
in Houston will be waiting for words that no speaker dares utter;
whereas 85% of the delegates in New York agreed with the words that
were spoken.

I'm still confused, bud!  Since you seem to care, perhaps you can take
another shot at an explanation.  And while you're at it, please also
explain Dannikins' position on choice/abortion where his own family
is concerned.  Bonus points are yours if the explanation doesn't involve
tax-and-spend liberals or failed governors of small states.  Thanks!


Dhanesh

Xref: sparky alt.fan.dan-quayle:2573 alt.politics.clinton:2115 alt.politics.bush:1902
From: dks@MIT.EDU (dks)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle,alt.politics.clinton,alt.politics.bush
Subject: Ode to Silent Liberals
Date: 18 Aug 92 00:57:08 GMT
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X-        alt.politics.bush.usenet
X-Command: Send_AEvt(doAutoForward)




              old George Herbert Walker Bush
            moral bankrupt seeking bail-out
          at his Coronation Convention
        reminds me of young Nero
          that Unholy Roman Emperor
            descending in _toga_virilis_
              and fiddling while Rome burns.



Ode to Silent Liberals
by Dhanesh, dks@mit.edu
From: alexo+@cs.cmu.edu (Alex Orenshteyn)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: I finally have understood the purpose for Republican Party's existence.
Date: 13 Aug 92 20:58:42 GMT
Organization: School of Computer Science, Carnegie Mellon



When Yellow Stone (or is it Jelly Stone?) national preserve burned,
multitudes and multitudes of scientists, political functionaries and
simple folks were stricken with grief about how all that eco-wealth
was going to waste. Later upon some reflection voices appeared which
did not take as grim a view of that fire, in fact, they mumbled about
improvement, rebirth of the Yellow Stone forrests. The nature after the
fire rose from ashes, shaked itself off and became leaner and meaner.

But enough of fables, the Rebublican party is like fire on the land
of America. Republicans have gone through US and in 12 years destroyed
nearly everything which was built by the Democrats in previous years,
they destroyed both good and bad, meat and fat. Was this destruction
necessary? Sure it was! Now that we have nothing left, no social
programs, no govermental safety net for poverty, no right to privacy,
no right to be free from government interference in private lives,
no educational system, no working judicial system; only now when we have
wounded the current system to the point of irrelevance of Federal Government
can we elect a democrat and rebuilt the country from scratch. Now we can
do it right because Republicans like good vultures they are, have pecked
all the rotten flesh off the Uncle Sam's old bones. Without anyone realizing it
Bush's pathetic indifference to anything but golf, green vegetables and
Mrs. Fitzgerald, has given this country a kick in the butt (and the
balls) which it desperately needed. Suddenly when nothing is certain
anymore (except D.Q. jokes) people are again interested in changing things,
to fight against the evil King George and find someone to lead who does not
need Halcyon to sleep.
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: ejohnso@ccu.umanitoba.ca (Eric Johnson)
Subject: Re: Danny's gray sideburns: fake?
Organization: University of Manitoba, Winnipeg, Canada
Date: Wed, 19 Aug 1992 15:04:13 GMT

In <57290001@hpscit.sc.hp.com> evan@hpscit.sc.hp.com (Evan Whitney) writes:

>Danny's gray sideburns look fake to me. Has anyone else noticed this?
>Is this an attempt to appear more mature and distiguished by dying
>his hair gray?

No, this is the result of a four year long combustion process. It will 
culminate on the night he gives his nomination acceptance speech.  As his
rhetoric builds to a fever pitch, his head will erupt in flames, but he will
continue his speech. The flames will be extinguished by his frothing at the 
mouth. Conservative delegates will go wild. MTV reporter Ted Nugent will
co-opt the act for his next tour. Thus Danny boy will have a new career -
rock concert flame-pot.
-- 
	Eric Johnson	         |  Commit random acts of kindness
	ejohnso@ccu.umanitoba.ca |        	and
"The Johnsons are taking over."  |        senseless beauty.