From: lorenzo@rintintin.Colorado.EDU (Eric J. Lorenzo)
Subject: Re: Anserphone game
Organization: University of Colorado, Boulder
Date: Tue, 10 Nov 1992 01:04:12 GMT

In article <1dltt1INNlg6@darkstar.UCSC.EDU> atario@cats.ucsc.edu (Stephen Wayne Miller) writes:
>
>n5gax@leo.unm.edu (Duke McMullan (n5gax)) writes:
>
>>In article <Bx2o6F.59y@news.iastate.edu> mandersn@iastate.edu (Mark A Anderson) writes:
>>>I worked as a security guard this summer . . . .
>
>>		Cute story deleted
>
>>>What have you done to computer callers?
>
>>This may be moving outside the realm of shin nanny guns, but, well, I just
>>hang up on computers.  You can't insult a computer, and I've never been interes-
>>ted enough to invest the time to try to screw it up.
>
>Speaking of phone shenanigans . . .
>
>I called up one of those ads in the classifieds that has nothing but a
>number to call (I was bored, ok??).  This one offered a guaranteed job at
>the U. S. Post Office.  I was surprised to hear an actual person on the
>other end, who instantly launched into the most scripted load of crap you
>ever heard.  She went on and on for what must have wound up being seven or
>eight minutes before she stopped to ask me anything.  At this point, I
>simply said, "Uh . . . I think I have the wrong number."  There was a
>pause, and I could swear I heard the faintest of sighs; then she hung up.
> They're obvious as hell--
>>you can hear the background hisses and clicks typical of a cheap recorder.  Any-
>
>
>>way, the recording just ignores you if you try to interrupt it . . . like a pol-
>>itician.  ;^)
>
>>A live person, now, that's different.  Usually I either tell the salesbug in
>>a cordial and courteous tone that I do not accept telephone solitations.  If
>>I have a little time to kill, I let the critter get well into h(is/er) spiel,
>>and just listen until it winds down.  This normally is followed by a leading
>>question, which I do not answer.  I just listen, making no sound.  I usually
>>get a couple of hellos followed by a hangup.  On a good day, the hangup is
>>preceded by a bit of invective.
>
>>Just last week, I got a call from some concern that was taking some sort of
>>a poll.  Feeling beneficient, I answered the lady's questions.  Then she asked
>>me if I read any magazines.  I read quite a number, and she voiced amazement
>>at the (incomplete) list I reeled off.  Then she explained that for taking the
>>time to participate in their poll, they were going to send me a number of
>>magazines (she reeled off HER list here) for my enjoyment.
>
>>_Then_ she mentioned that I would need to remit a small amount to defray the
>>mailing costs (AHA! said my hindbrain!) . . . only about three dollars and
>>mumble cents per week. (Hindbrain says $3.mumble/wk * 52 wk/yr > $150/yr.)
>
>>At this point the silent treatment began.  She made a couple of more remarks
>>and waited for my response.  A math type would note the isomorphism between
>>my response and the empty set.
>
>>The lady^H^H^H^Hgal said something like "Hello?  Hello!  Mister McMullan?",
>>then to someone in the background, "He hung up on me! <interject 2 additional
>>female voices, giggling> I wonder how long ago he hung up? <click!>"
>
>>It didn't exactly make my day, but I noticed that the day had become kinder and
>>gentler.
>
>>Perhaps she was training additional salesbugs in this Evil Art, I can't say.
>>Neither would I expect her to be reading this newsgroup, but just on the min-
>>iscule, remote and vanishingly small chance that these words might pass her
>>way, I say to you, my dear:   PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!!!!!!!!
>
>
>>Here's a story I heard from a fellow who shipped as a cook on a steamer
>>out of Australia back in the 1940's. It seems the mate kept a penguin in
>>his room...female, of course. The bird was no more cleanly than the mate,
>>and it used to cli{{]{{~~B~~~~~~~~~~~~{{{4{{{{{{{{{{\\\\\\{{\\{\{
>>~~~~xx~~x~x~neer had set up for making illegal booze, so the captain
>>didn't notice when th [mmate's shoes were left abov~~~~~~~~{{{{~~{~{{
>>              
>
>
>
>
>
>
>>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~xx~xxxxxxxxx~x~```````````x~X~~~Xxxxxx`x~xx`x`xxxxxxxxxx`
>>[mwo of the sailors, blotto drunk, found the captain's
>>private stock of rum, and "spiked" it with the engineer's bathtub booze.
>>Then the stupid penguin shit in the capt~~~~~~~~~~~~xx~xx~~~x~`
>>{4gation, the ship owners decided
>>that the captain could, under strict probation, keep his command.
>
>
>
>>Well, that's the guy's tale. I don't think I'll _EVER_ believe the bit
>>about the broom and the belaying pin!
>
>>						d
>>-- 
>>	     "Marry a Monkey or Rat late in life.  Avoid the Dog."
>>			       -- From a Chinese Zodiac restaurant placemat
>>Duke McMullan n5gax nss13429r phon505-255-4642 ee5391aa@triton.unm.edu (for now)
>-- 
>  __     | atario@cats.ucsc.edu | "Oh no!  Toonces, look out!  AIIIEEEE!"  --SNL
> (_      | Delphi:  ATARIO      | "This is only an exhibition.  This is not a
> __)teve | "Happy happy!        |  competition.  So please . . . no wagering."
>         |  Joy joy!"  --R & S  |              --Late Night with David Letterman


	Can we do some editing once in a while?!?!?!  (get the point?)
-- 
       --    O          The thrill is                   Eric J. Lorenzo
     ---   </\_      not just in winning,       lorenzo@Rintintin.Colorado.EDU
   ----  -\/\         but in the courage                  also @UCSU
      ---   /_         to join the race    -?               & @Spot
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