From: htuttle@nyx.cs.du.edu (Harry Tuttle)
Subject: Sniveling Whiny Conservatives
Organization: Nyx, Public Access Unix @ U. of Denver Math/CS dept.
Distribution: na
Date: Fri, 13 Nov 92 23:07:13 GMT



I really wish that all of the cyberfascists out there would stop whining
about the horrors of a Clinton presidency.

It's very unbecoming.

Rush and the Rushettes that listen to him are beginning to sound like
the bad guys in a Scooby Doo cartoon after they are caught:

"Ooohhh.  Why you little...Bush would have gotten away with it, if it
wasn't for you snooping liberals!"

Ho-hum.  Yes, I guess that this country is going to sink even lower (is
that possible?) now that we have such a philandering, drug-taking, 
draft-dodging, L-L-L-Liberal in the Oval Office.

I mean, my God, he's married to a strong woman, too!  What on earth is
this country coming to?  

Methinks that Rush and his Rushettes are just a mite bit insecure in the
fact that Ms. Clinton will now be a part of the "First Couple."  
Usually that is a sure-fire indication of men who are not very confident
of their masculinity, but hey, I'm no psychologist.

But to all of you out there (including Rush) who are soooo afraid 
that a (Gasp!) woman might have some power in the White House, I have
two words for you:

Nancy Reagan.

Anyway, you are all getting to be very tiresome.  It hasn't even been two
weeks since the election, and already the Republicans sound like a 
broken record.
     "He'll tax and spend...ruin the country...tax and spend..ruin
      the country...smoke dope...ruin the country...wait and see...
      you'll be sorry...tax and spend..."

Yes, well, that all remains to be seen, doesn't it?  I mean, I hardly 
think that it is fair that conservatives are only giving Clinton
4 years to undo what the Republican Lobotomy Twins did in 12.

Well, while I have your attention, I think it is time to unveil:

THE RUSH LIMBAUGH WEIGHT-WATCH

Rush is undeniably a mega-celebrity in the state-of-the-art, 
electronically sophisticated medium that is AM radio.  His listeners
number into the hundreds and people all over the country listen to
him every day because they really have nothing better to do.  Some
even summarize every single one of his shows.  Wow, he must be big.

That's the problem.  He's too big.  As the mega-star that he is, Rush
has certain responsibilities. It's important that he watches his weight
in order to:
(1) create a positive image for all the Rushettes out there, and;
(2) make sure that he doesn't die of a heart attack on the air.

Especially now that he has his prime-time show (they usually run it just
after those infomercials for the juice machine and the car wax, I 
noticed), he has to look his best and feel his best.

So we have to help him.  Send in your comments about just how fat 
Limbaugh is.

My estimation of the Limbaugh girth as of Nov. 13, 1992 is:

289 pounds.

O.K. There you have it.  So start guessing, and let's try to build
a consensus.  Then we can monitor it, and see if Rush can avoid the
"danger zone" where his arteries get so clogged that they cease to 
pump blood to his heart, black and foul as it may be.

To sum up (for all of you wacky conservatives out there):
1. Stop whining.
2. Can't do worse than Nancy.
3. Rush real fat.

OK, I'm outta here.  Remember to buy Rush Limbaugh's book, "You Gonna 
Eat That?" and keep him in Oreos and Big Macs forever.  



"We're all in this together."
Harry Tuttle



Newsgroups: alt.fan.rush-limbaugh