From: loszewski_im@sage.hnrc.tufts.edu
Newsgroups: misc.fitness
Subject: Re: The misc.fitness TOP TEN list
Date: 29 Jul 92 12:59:27 GMT
Organization: USDA HNRC at Tufts University

In article <1992Jul28.214951.28742@inter-tel.com>, wohlenbe@inter-tel.com (Greg Wohlenberg) writes:
> 
>      To introduce a lighter  note  to this newsgroup, I have created the "Top
> Ten Best Topics and Phrases in Misc.Fitness" list.   Warning:   If  you don't
> have a  sense  of  humor,  please skip this note and procede to read the next
> highly informative and well-researched posting.  If  you  do  have a sense of
> humor, please put on your seatbelt.
> 
> 
> 10. Cross Training
> 
>      Yes, cross training.  We all know this one.  "I love  to  ride  my bike,
> inline  skate,  use  the  stairmaster,  run,  play  raquetball,  play tennis,
> trampoline, climb rocks, and have sex  30  times a week.  Is is possible that
> this much aerobics might affect my weight training?" [No,  not  really.  You
> probably just need to cut down on the sex.]

 ----Why not cut down on all the other stuff??????????????????
> 
> 9. Injuries
> 
>      Injuries?   What  are  injuries?   My  favorite  is  the  stuff  like "I
> completely blew out both knees while doing downhill  ski racing.  Is it OK to
> attempt a maximum squat (you know, 1000 lbs.  or so) while my knees are still
> pinned and braced?"  The great  thing  is  that  we have so many "doctors" in
> misc.fitness that you're  sure  to  get  a lot of different answers to choose
> from.
> 
> 8. Studies
> 
>      You know, those  great  scientific  studies  produced  by  our reputable
> scientific institutions around the world?   "I  saw  this  study  showing how
> people lost body fat and  gained  muscle muscle mass by hopping around on one
> foot all day and eating lots of  an  herb  only  obtainable  from Madagascar.
> Should I  start  doing this?"  Well, don't let us stop you.  Those scientific
> studies  are  quite  useful  when  you  have some help interpreting them from
> newspapers such as the Enquirer.  Don't worry about the fact that most of the
> studies are observational and contain a variety of inappropriate conclusions.
> 
> 7. Love Handles, Body Fat, Abs, Etc.
> 
>      You know this  one--"I've  got  a set of love handles and my significant
> other demands I get rid of  them  or  I'm out on the street".  There's always
> one  poster indicating that they need to do 100 situps a day.  That poster is
> then bombed by 500 people gently reminding him or  her that you CAN'T F*#$ing
> SPOT REDUCE.
> 
> 6. Covert Bailey
> 
>      Yes, good old  Covert.   You  had  better  not  mess  with  him  in this
> newsgroup.  It is a lot like messing with God  himself.   Sure,  Covert  is a
> great guy but  with  a name like his you've got to figure he's trying to hide
> something.
> 
> 5. Steroids
> 
>      Let's see.  "Do those fine people in the muscle magazines use that nasty
> steroid stuff?"  What, are you stupid or something?  Didn't you know that all
> IFFB events are drug tested?  It's really  not  that hard to get to 290 at 6%
> bodyfat  if you're work hard enough at it.  You probably just don't know what
> hard work is.
> 
> 4. Sets and Reps
> 
>      Hmmm.   "Could  somebody  please  look   at   my  workout  plan?   I  do
> approximately 25 sets per bodypart on a 6-on 1-off schedule.  I  haven't made
> any  gains  for a few years, though.  What's wrong?"  Well, just a wild guess
> but it might have something to do with the lack of list entry #5.
> 
> 3. Supplements
> 
>      Here's another beauty.  "Joe Weider said that I can't  possibly  get big
> and strong unless I eat  tons of supplements including individual servings of
> at least 2000  calories.   Is  this  true?"   Well, we all know the answer to
> this--OF COURSE IT'S TRUE.   Who  are  you  to  question  the  mastur "bater"
> blaster, the inventor  of  the  Weider  Money  Making  Principle (my favorite
> Weider principle).
> 
> 2. Arm Wrestling
> 
>      Wow, did I learn something here.  I never knew that arm wrestling was so
> important to fitness!  I  promise  to  eat  a nasty concoction of vanilla ice
> cream,  chili  dogs,  tabasco  sauce,  and  jalapeno  peppers followed by 200
> hanging leg lifts every day until I learn my lesson.
> 
> 
> And the number one answer is...
> 
> 1. Hope This Helps (HTH)
> 
>      I don't know about you, but this one is really unfair!  To put things on
> an even playing field,  I  would  like to formally introduce the sister phase
> Hope This Confuses (HFC).  That way you  can always make you intentions clear
> no matter why you posted!
> 
> 
> HTC,
> 
> 
> Greg Wohlenberg          ||  Voice: (602) 961-9000
> Inter-tel, Inc.          ||    Fax: (602) 961-1370
> 6505 W. Chandler Blvd.   || E-mail: wohlenbe@inter-tel.com
> Chandler, Arizona, 85226 ||         wohlenbe%intertel.uucp@asuvax.eas.asu.edu
Newsgroups: misc.fitness