From: foleye@storm.CS.ORST.EDU (Stilt Man)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.pro-wrestling
Subject: FWF:  Damien vs. Hurricane
Summary: "Greased Lightning" Damien Flayer takes on "Hurricane" Andrew Simms.
Date: 3 Oct 92 02:30:07 GMT
Organization: Computer Science Dept., Oregon State University
Originator: foleye@storm.CS.ORST.EDU

And so, the Fictional Wrestling Federation goes back onto the net with yet
another of its crazy and semi-exciting matches.

By the way, if anyone has suggestions for a face character they wouldn't mind
seeing in these matches, email me for details on what I'm looking for.  Once
I sent Blue Steele over to Liam Kelly's fold, I just noticed I've only got
three left.

At any rate, today I have a match that I didn't previously announce:
"Hurricane" Andrew Simms challenges "Greased Lightning" Damien Flayer.  A
somewhat tall order for a newcomer, as Flayer is a two-time United States
Champion of former days.  A win could put Simms in the big time quick, while
a loss to Flayer may set the Slick Shocker up for a shot at a title soon.

Comments from both sides:

Simms . . .

"Damien Flayer, they tell me I've got a tough task tonight in the Meadowlands,
up against an ex-U.S. Champ.  But I generally go into any match optimistic,
and I've seen a lot worse.  I'm headed straight for the top in the FWF, and
you are the one who's got the misfortune of being my first victim!  I'm not
gimmicky, I'm not a cartoon character, I'm a wrestler.  And you'll find out
just how good of one in just a few minutes . . . ."

Flayer:

"Pfah!  I ask for a shot at getting my U.S. Title back, and they give me this
Floridan goofball named Simms.  Everybody knows I'm the greatest United States
Champion of all time, and I'm just on vacation until I win it a third time.
And when the twin storms hit the Meadowlands, you'll find out why they're more
worried about lightning than hurricanes!!"


-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Scorpions' "Rock You Like a Hurricane" rings out abruptly over the PA
system of the Meadowlands Coliseum, and a green-eyed, brown-haired young man
with an ear-to-ear smile on his face steps out of the dressing room.  He has
a springy bounce in his stride, and wears simple red tights and boots with the
letters "Hurricane" in all caps on his rump.  The Grinch begins his task . . .

"THE FOLLOWING CONTEST IS SCHEDULED FOR THREE FALLS TO A FINISH, WITHIN THE
CONFINES OF A STEEL CAGE!  THERE ARE ONE MINUTE REST PERIODS BETWEEN FALLS.
INTRODUCING FIRST, HAILING FROM MIAMI, FLORIDA . . . HE WEIGHS TWO HUNDRED AND
FIFTY POUNDS:  HERE IS THE 'HURRICANE' ANDREW SIMMS!!"

He hops over the top rope, looking up at the cage suspended over the ring.  He
had requested the cage match because he knows of Flayer's alliance with the
"Scorpion" Stan Golding, and wants nothing of that.  He saw the attack by John
Lawless and Kane the Undertaker on Titan Morgan, and knows that Morgan now
wears a neck-brace to recover.  He is not interested in a double team attack.

But then, he thinks, why would his foe bother?  He's a newcomer, and an
established wrestler like his opponent shouldn't need help with a newcomer,
right?

The music shifts to Spectre General's "Nothing's Gonna Stand In Our Way," and
a second individual parts the curtains to step into the aisle.  He also walks
with something of a bounce, with a touch of an arrogant strut mixed in.  Gray
eyes and platinum-blonde hair adorn this one's head, and a long-legged set of
pants with a stylized lightning streak on the legs hang over ebon boots.
He has high hopes for this match.  The FWF Championship Committee has his name
in the running for a title shot soon, but he has to prove he can take this
newcomer in the cage.  Barring a victory for his foe, he will be the next
challenger to the United States title he once held.

"AND HIS OPPONENT, FROM CLEVELAND, OHIO.  HE WEIGHS TWO HUNDRED AND FIFTEEN
POUNDS:  'GREASED LIGHTNING' DAMIEN FLAYER!!!"

Flayer rolls under the bottom rope, jumping up and down to unlimber his legs
when he reaches the ring.  Alfred Grinchley steps outside the ring, and the
official is left alone with the pair inside the ring.  He gives the signal to
the cage operator up in the rafters, and the bars of blue-painted alloy begin
to lower around the ring.

There is a ceiling.  There is no door.  The controls are up in the rafters,
with a fenced catwalk leading out to them.  The door to the catwalk is locked,
and the operator has the only key.  Except for what the contestants themselves
come up with, the match is assured to be clean.  The cage is twenty feet tall,
so there is room within for aerial moves off the turnbuckles.

Flayer gives Simms some chatter as the cage reaches the ground, and the fans
jeer in response.  Simms merely smiles in amusement, his temper above such
simple mind games.  The referee checks first Flayer, then Simms for foreign
objects, and then calls for the opening bell.

The two combatants circle the ropes a couple of times.  Suddenly, Simms dives
for Flayer's legs, but he doesn't have the alias "Greased Lightning" because
he's slow enough to get caught by this.  Flayer hops over the lunge, and comes
up in the middle of the ring with Simms in the corner.  Simms spins around,
and engages Flayer in a collar-and-elbow tie.

Instantly, Flayer's arm loops around Simms' head, but Simms is to the ropes
almost as quickly.  He shoves Flayer loose, only to be dropped with a shoulder
block off the ropes.  Flayer goes to the ropes, and Simms rolls onto his belly
to allow the smaller man to pass over.  But in a move too quick for the eye
to follow, Flayer's right leg goes out from under him, and the elbow speeds
down to impact upon the back of Simms' head!  Simms clutches at the base of
his skull, the blow threatening his consciousness already.  He rolls away
instinctively, catching the ropes to make Flayer back away.

Flayer complies, and Simms gets up on his knees dazedly.  Flayer smiles
derisively, and the hardcores pop to approve of the swift move.  Simms rises
to his feet, chagrinned, and starts walking back up to Flayer.  A swift shove
to the chest hurls Flayer a few feet back, enraging the former U.S. Champion.
Flayer moves to push Simms back, but Simms grabs him in the legs, making
Flayer's anger work faster than his reflexes.  Over onto his back Flayer goes,
and Simms whirls around in a step-over-toe hold, dropping into a grapevine
before Flayer can do anything about it!

The marks cheer, and Flayer screams in pain from the move.  His right knee is
quickly going on him, for Simms is far stronger than his weight would seem to
indicate.  Simms rises in a sit-up position, and rolls over onto his knees
with Flayer's leg still pinioned.  He slowly sits up and squats, putting Flayer
into a half-Boston crab.  Flayer reaches for the ropes, knowing that this has
to stop soon if he's to keep his speed advantage.  Finally, he makes it, and
Simms releases the hold without the official even needing to ask.

The smaller man rises to one knee at the side of the ring, glaring at Simms.
The "Hurricane" shouts loudly, "COME ON!!"  The fans echo the call, and Flayer
stands, forgetting his knee, and yells at some of them at ringside.  Then he
remembers his knee, being forcefully reminded by a twinge of pain shooting up
his right leg.  He stumbles, and the referee asks if he can go on.  He responds
that he is all right, and limps slightly as he goes around the ring.

Simms slowly cuts off the ring, and Flayer is stuck in the corner.  Simms tries
to lock up again, but Flayer dives between his legs with far more agility than
a hurt knee would seem to allow!  Simms is not quick enough to avoid the
crescent kick that impacts on his jaw as he turns around, and is sent back into
the buckles agonizingly!  Flayer quickly whips him out of the corner, and
cartwheels across into a handspring elbow that impacts mere instants after Simms
lands in the opposite corner!  Simms staggers out and crumples to the mat,
and Flayer, wide-eyed, mocks the fans with a wordless shout of jubilation.

He stands Simms up, seizes him by the hair and the trunks, hurling him up over
the top rope into the cage!  Simms grabs onto the bars, hearing Flayer run up
to follow, and kicks out over him into the ring.  He seizes him by the waist,
whipping the smaller man up and over into a German suplex!  One!  Two . . .


No!  Flayer manages to get a shoulder up, and slips sideways out of the
bridge waistlock.  He grabs onto his head, for the move was executed quite
well.  Simms gives his head more to worry about, sending him down to the mat
in a running bulldog from behind!

But Flayer lands with his foot tangled in the bottom rope, and the official
backs Simms away.  He staggers to his feet after a little while, shaking his
head as he rises up.  The moment he is clear of the ropes, Simms moves toward
him.

Flayer is not as hurt as he looks, and he drops Simms in a toe hold, sliding
down to apply leverage.  Simms is sent over forwards and, since Flayer was at
the edge of the ring, lands with his throat over the top rope!  He falls out
into the middle of the ring, and Flayer slowly lifts him back up again.  He
picks him up in a simple scoop, but slams him down over one knee.  Simms arches
up in pain, and Flayer gives him a quick boot for good measure.  Simms snatches
around his legs weakly, preventing a second boot, and Flayer tries to get loose.
Simms' hold slides up his legs, until he has him around the hips.  He lifts
him up into the air, holding him there as he sets himself on his own feet, and
finally drops his tail across his right knee.

Flayer's body goes rigid, and he turns and walks away in a quite comical manner.
Simms comes up behind him, looping one arm overhead, and lifts him up into a
horizontal position.  He drops him ungently on his back, leaving him motionless.
He stands and draws a finger across his throat to signal that the first fall
is near.  He picks Flayer up in a waistlock and sets him on the turnbuckle, 
then starts to climb himself, grabbing Flayer in a waistlock for a belly-to-
belly superplex!


An ebon cloud flies from Flayer's mouth, striking Simms in the eyes!  Simms
falls back from the turnbuckle, knocking himself somewhat silly, clutching
spasmodically at his eyes.  The "Storm Cloud" having done its job, Flayer
climbs down from the turnbuckles, and sets Simms into a reverse backbreaker!
He climbs the ropes in the corner, facing outward, and comes out in a backflip
in midair, twisting a full 360 vertically in midair before landing with one
knee on Simms' head!  The Lightning Stroke, several fans recognize!  He covers
Simms, hooking one leg.  One!  Two . . .


And three!

Flayer stands, gesturing in victory, and the Grinch comes over the loudspeaker.

"THE WINNER OF THE FIRST FALL, NOW LEADING ONE FALL TO NONE, 'GREASED
LIGHTNING' DAMIEN FLAYER!!"

Flayer goes wide eyed.  He forgot that this was a best-of-three match.  He
curses in a manner that causes several small children to cover their mouths
and giggle and several of their mothers to rear back in shock.  The official
backs him away from Simms, reminding him that his opponent has a one minute
rest period before the second fall begins.  Not that it matters.  Simms is
blind, bleeding from his forehead and nose, and is thoroughly hurt in general.
Flayer sits back for a minute, and Simms rolls onto his belly, trying to get
some feeling back into his limbs.

His eyes are burning up, but he is starting to get a little vision in them.
But he'll have limited visibility for a long time.  His entire head feels like
a Mack truck ran over it.  What does Flayer have in that knee pad?  He calls
the official over and points to the knee that Flayer hit him with it, asking
him to search it.  The official goes over and relays the request.

Flayer stares at the ceiling, disgusted with the whole idea.  Simms, however,
has made a smart move.  It will take a bit longer than just a minute to check
the knee pad thoroughly enough.  This gives Simms a bit longer to rest.  Many
of the fans encourage the ref to make Simms remove the kneepad and display it,
and finally this is what the official does, in fact, do.

There is nothing in the knee pad, as it turns out, but there has been at least
two or three minutes more for Simms to recuperate.  At long last, the official
calls for the bell to start the second fall.  Simms stays near the ropes,
knowing that he's not going to have much idea where he is unless his eyes
clear up if he's not near the ropes.  Flayer stalks after him, knowing he has
his prey at a disadvantage.

Simms lashes out, and his foot impacts just above Flayer's knee.  The move is
reflexive, and Flayer's knee buckles from beneath him, sending him to the mat.
Simms has a very good idea of pressure points to strike at, and drapes the leg
over the bottom rope.  He sends all 250 into it, hoping to slow Flayer's
mobility down and perhaps even the odds.  Flayer rolls into a fetal ball in
pain, and Simms grabs the leg, the same right leg he had been hitting earlier.
He pulls it out, leaping toward Flayer's head with it in his hands, bending
the hamstrings around.  However, it has little effect on a man with Flayer's
agility.  Flayer clutches at it anyway, for the knee was in fact hurt by it
nevertheless.  The second fall suddenly looks a bit more even as Flayer makes
it to his feet, as wobbly on one bad leg as Simms is with bad eyesight.

Simms still has his balance, though, and he grabs Flayer by the hair, sending
him across the ring.  He goes for a dropkick, but doesn't get as much as he
could have with it because of poor depth perception.  Flayer, nonetheless, is
shot backward into the ropes again.  He's light enough that even a botched hit
will move him.  Simms, wiping guck out of his eyelashes, rises and moves to
make his next move.

Flayer raises his hands, begging for mercy, and the official steps Simms back,
not knowing if Flayer wants to quit.  Simms knows that there's not a point in
Flayer submitting if he's not in serious pain at this point, because he's still
got a fall to give before he actually loses the match.  He puts Flayer back on
his feet after hammering a foot to the midsection, and whips him across the
ring.  He scoops him up and turns him over onto his back for a crunching power
slam, hooking the leg from his position for the cover!  One!  Two . . .


. . . and three!!

Flayer kicks out violently, infuriated.  He shouts at the official about a fast
count, going into conniptions in scarlet-faced rage!  The Grinch announces the
result:

"THE WINNER OF THE SECOND FALL, ENDING THIS BOUT AT ONE FALL APIECE:
'HURRICANE' ANDREW SIMMS!!"

Flayer is not happy with this result whatsoever, and the official calls over
his shoulder for the timekeeper to continue the one-minute call.  Simms stands
across the ring in his corner, chuckling at Flayer's bad sportsmanship.  The
timekeeper rings the bell for the third fall, but Flayer ignores it.  Simms
allows the argument to continue, thinking of a cheap schoolboy for the third
fall quickly.  He finally walks up and taps Flayer on the shoulder from behind.

Flayer spins, and gets a right hook on the ear.  He clutches at his head, and
Simms catches him in a front facelock.  He loops a shoulder overhead, and lifts
him up with a hand under the waist, steadying him horizontally as he slowly
backs into the center of the ring.  The fans slowly cheer louder and louder
as Simms backs out, but then he rocks Flayer forward a bit to get his weight
under him again.  He steadies him vertically after the wobble, and slowly steps
forward out from under him, dropping him like a spear straight down into the
mat.  Flayer's head bounces off the mat, and he flops pathetically onto his
back.  Simms covers him once again, much more nonchalant, one, two . . .


. . . and three.

The fans cheer loudly, and Simms' hand is raised.  The Grinch makes the final
announcment:

"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THE WINNER OF THIS BOUT BY A COUNT OF TWO FALLS TO ONE:
'HURRICANE' ANDREW SIMMS!!!"

The upset has cost Flayer a shot at the U.S. Title, Simms knows already.  But
if he'd just think a little more and complain a little less, maybe he would
have won the third fall anyway.  The cage is raised, and Simms exits the ring.
Only after he is all the way back to the dressing room does Flayer even twitch.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


And there's the match.  I just came up with Simms today, patterning him after
my portrayal of (at least former) EMWA World Champion John Girder a bit from
Dreamcard V when he took on FWF World Champion Doctor Death.  Hopefully a few
people enjoyed this one.

 __________________________________________________________________________
|Stilt Man --Never ask a mortician to go out and bring you back a cold one.|
|  foleye@xanth.cs.orst.edu	                            		   |
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