From: clare@nynexst.com (Clare Chu)
Subject: Re: Call For New FAQ
Organization: Nynex Science and Technology
Distribution: usa
Date: Fri, 14 Aug 92 14:30:41 GMT

In article <1992Aug14.023242.20149@bnr.ca> thao@bnr.ca (Anthony Murtagh) writes:
>well, after clare's posts concerning dense and otherwise
>hint-impaired am's, i feel that a new faq is necessary.
>this new faq would entail the direct/indirect hints
>that af's give to am's for dating purposes.

  That's a good idea.  Often-times I'm not sure if the AsAm guy
  was not interested, or that the AAF didn't give out enough
  hints.  Although it seems that it is a lot easier to get a
  white guy to ask you out just by dropping a little hint.
  Some of the AAMs you hit over the head and then they act
  like they're not interested.  
>
>i am serious about this faq.  after all, i may be
>missing out on some things  :-)

Scene 1:

 1)  The interested AAF will invite you to parties (not as a
 date), but as in "My friends are getting together for a
 <excuse of some type>, do you want to come and help us
 celebrate?"  Notice that she is not asking you on a date,
 because usually she doesn't want to appear too forward.
 Of course she'll cover it up by asking you to bring all
 your friends saying that she wants to make sure there are
 enough guys, or something like that.  Of course at this
 stage, if she specifically asks if your friend Joe is
 coming, then you might assume that it is Joe that she is
 interested in.  However if she just says to bring your
 friends, then it's a safe bet that it's you.  However
 it might not be her that is interested, but one of her
 friends, and she's just doing the inviting.  So now at
 least you know that someone is interested.
 2)  Now if you decide to pursue this, definitely go to
 the party and observe if any groups of females are looking
 out for your arrival, if there are any signs of giggling
 and or winking.  See who it is directed at and who's
 trying to hide their face and look away when you show up.
 That's the likely candidate.
 3)  Now go up to the friends and talk.  See how fast they
 run off to "leave the two of you alone."  The one that
 is left is probably the one that is interested.  Go from there.
 Meaning that you still have to take the initiative to "ask".
 She's just setting it up to make it convenient for you.
 4)  However after X parties, or lunches at the cafeteria, and
 you still haven't responded she'll probably end up dating the
 next available white boy.

Scene 2:

 1)  The more athletic interested AAF will frequently suggest
 tennis matches.  Unless you're a real Michael Chang, you
 can be sure she isn't asking you to play tennis to improve
 her game.  
 2)  Go along if you're interested and take it from there.
 Don't forget that she is still waiting for you to make the
 first move and "ask".  You might go through 100 tennis games
 and if you don't say anything, she'll probably give up.
 And along comes some cute white boy to whisk her away.
 Later she'll tell all her friends, well I tried to date
 an Asian guy, but I can't wait around forever.

 (variations are jogging, bike riding, sailing).


Scene 3:

 1)  The religious interested AAF will appear very concerned
 about your spiritual life.  She'll invite you to the youth
 group meetings at her church.  She'll frequently ask you
 to "share" about your spiritual glimmerings.  She'll ask
 you to read books about religion and discuss the meaning of
 it.  
 2)  If you can stand it, you're being groomed to be her
 husband.  You don't need to do too much except go along and
 "share" your feelings for her.  
 3)  Personally I'd run for the hills, but hey, what do I know?


Scene 4:

  1)  The gluttonous interested AAF will frequently talk about
  restaurants in front of you.  "I just love Mexican food,
  my friends went to the Green Onion and had fajitas.  They
  said it was muy excellente."
  2)  If you're interested say, "Oh great, I love the Green
  Onion too.  I'll treat you to the mumbo jumbo fajita combo
  the next time you go."  You can be sure you're going to
  the Green Onion tonight!
  3)  Don't forget to dangle Mexican food in front of her nose
  and her mouth will water like Pavlov's dog everytime her phone
  rings.

Scene 5:

  1)  The childish semi-adolescent AAF will gripe frequently
  about her parents.  "They won't let me go out on dates.
  They won't let me go anywhere unless my brother is around."
  2)  Appeal to her sense of intrigue by suggesting a covert
  meeting at the library or church spaghetti dinner.
  3)  Enlist another AAF friend or sister for cover-up.
  4)  Maybe her parents will let her go out with this female
  friend, then you can join in one block away from her parent's
  house.  Don't forget that half of the fun is sneaking out
  from the parents, so don't make yourself too attractive to
  the parents, else you might find out that she's dumped you
  for another rogue.

Scene 6:
 
  1)  The new-age AAF will introduce herself and her spiritual
  channel, saying "Shirley thinks that your aura is resonating
  with mine."  
  2)  Definitely run for the hills.

Scene 7:

  1)  The unbalanced AAF will pronounce that her therapist has
  decided that she get out more.  Therefore as part of her
  therapy, you, designated harmless nice AA boy, will help
  her to the road of recovery littered with the relics of
  ye-many white men.  
  2)  Run away screaming for the hills.

Scene 8:

 1)  The assertive,professional and over-30 AAF who has read all
 the books on "how to get a man", will professionally and crisply
 announce, "You know, I find you quite interesting, why don't
 we get together for dinner some time?  Are you free Friday,
 good, let me make a note of that on my HP personal date-tracker."
 2)  Pretty obvious, right?  My advice is to go for it, even if
 not interested.   Who knows this might be your last chance.
 Besides she probably has property, and wants you to stay home
 with the kids, pretty good deal, heh?

>
>clare, if it's any consolation, will you go out with
>me on an electronic date?  :-)  yes, i'm aware that
>you are married...and i hope your husband isn't reading
>this.  :-)  ;-)

  Don't worry, he doesn't read news.  That's why I can
  get away with all the outrageous things I post.
  I wonder how people whose spouses read news can stand it?  :-)

  Okay, where can we go?  Is there an electronic Mexican
  restaurant on the net?  (I'm dying to go to the Green
  Onion in San Pedro again, hint, hint.)  My son and I are
  surviving on Tina's frozen burritos, for now.  :-(
>
>laly thao
>
>P. S. Mr. Ayala, i'm just kidding.  :-)
>

  Just send him some authentic Thai cooking for consolation.
  He won't care!  :-)
Newsgroups: soc.culture.asian.american