From: jgreene@dorm.rutgers.edu (Jeffrey Greene)
Newsgroups: alt.pub.dragons-inn
Subject: [Blade] [NewChar] [NPC] E.L.F.
Date: 7 Oct 92 01:57:48 GMT
Organization: Rutgers Univ., New Brunswick, N.J.

[ADMIN: The following not only introduces new NPC's to Generica, but is a
prequel to a new character post, as well as a prequel to Blade 2: Revenge of
the Motherspawn, a thread currently in pre-production (see previous post on
voting).]

The door to the inn opens, and yet another figure enters the establishment.

A dwarf this time, dressed in a dark brown tunic.  Leather boots, gloves, and
belt complete the rather drab ensemble.  His beard is neatly trimmed, and he
seems rather well groomed (for a dwarf).  He carries a clipboard, a wooden
slate with a rather rusty hinge holding a hodge-podge of assorted papers of
different colors (yellow, pink, and white seem the favorites) and sizes.

He marches straight up to the bar and without so much as a "I am the greatest
fighter and I dare anyone to challenge me" or a "Round for the house on me,
good barkeep" or even a "Doesn't this place have any more corners", he asks
"Is this the Dragon's Inn?"

At this, the entire room, nay the entire inn, nay even the entire city of 
Generica (alright, maybe this is pressing it) stopped what they were doing
to look at the dwarf with that 'you-poor-soul' look on their faces that seemed
to express the opinion that this dwarf must have been born yesterday.  I mean,
it's one thing to end up in the Dragon's Inn and not know where, who, or
what you are, but it's a whole other swordfight when you are looking for the 
inn and not know you've found it when you get there.  Really, like there was
another inn in Generica with 18 darkest corners, 1 lightest one, patrons of
every known size, shape, make, model, and color.

"Yes, that's where you are," sighed the barkeep, whose job description actually
states he not only needs to fix drinks but also to inform people of where they
are, and the rules therein.

"Good," said the dwarf.  "Sign here," he continued, shoving his clipboard in 
the poor barkeep's face.

This was not in his job description.

"Hold on here..." objected the bartender.

"Look, I'm from E.L.F. and I got a delivery for the Dragon's Inn."

Noting the blank expression on the face of the gentleman behind the bar, the
dwarf reached into his tunic and presented a card:

                    ________________________________
                    |                              |
                    |      Evendeal, Levelhead     |
                    |        and Fairweather       |
                    |                              |
                    |  shipping anything anywhere  |
                    |    anywhen anytime anyhow    |
                    |______________________________|

He then started to put the card back in his tunic, but thought better of it,
and posted it upon the message board instead.

"Look, E.L.F. is a brand new delivery service in Generica.  Because of the
peculiar nature of the city, we are able to ship things and have them arrive
the day before you place an order with us.  We'll ship anything to any
physical or temporal location at your convienience by any means necessary, for
a small fee," the dwarf said methodically, somewhat pleased that his "new
employee packet" contained a copy of the company policy and that he memorized
it.

"So, you going to sign, or what?"

"Yeah, I guess."

The necessary papers receive the necessary signatures, and the dwarf shambles
outside.  He returns with a bucket of some black gooey substance, followed by
a tall, brawny ogre carring a huge, thick, flat bundle.

The dwarf waves the ogre to an unnoccupied section of wall between 3 dark
corners and motions for him to start unpacking.  The ogre does so, tearing off
the plain brown wrapping to reveal five sheets of plateglass, each 9'x9'.
He places one flat on the ground, then the other four perpendicular to it, one
per side.  The dwarf has come over at this point, and uses a brush to apply 
the gooey substance to all the joints, making a water tight seal.

Which is good, because the ogre leaves and returns with a bucket of water
(sea water, from the smell of brine in the air), and starts filling the tank.
He leaves and returns many times until the tank is almost full.  Then he and
the dwarf leave the inn.

-jak