From: jcliu@four-lab4.Berkeley.EDU (James C. Liu)
Newsgroups: soc.culture.japan
Subject: Roman Hikou (was: Pheromones,otoko,and cabs)
Date: 31 Dec 1992 06:19:55 GMT
Organization: UC Berkeley Dept. of Nuclear Engineering
NNTP-Posting-Host: four-lab4.berkeley.edu

In article <3549@aegis.or.jp> davidg@aegis.or.jp (Dave McLane) writes:

  >I took what you said somewhat seriously. While I'm not sure if
  >eating steak would increase testosterone/pheronome, there is some
  >reason to believe that Japanese men have less of both compared to
  >western men (horrible overgeneralization but such is life). David
  >
  [stuff deleted]
  >
  >I don't have any data to hand about pheronomes but there have been
  >
  [more stuff deleted]
  >
  >So I don't take your original post as a joke. I think it makes
  >some sense.

Well I'm glad someone thought it made sense.  Doomo.  But to get to
the point at hand. The original Japanese person (Yonezawa Testu-san)
who posted this was complaining about how he didn't understand why 
some Japanese ladies prefer foreign men.  Yonezawa-san went on to 
suggest that it may be because they feel that Japanese men are not 
as "strong" or don't say "I love you."  In my poor attempt to 
interject humor and sarcasm through this "gaijin-meat-eater-pheromone"
theory, I didn't get to the point - which was trying to explain why 
Japanese men lose girls to gaijin and what Japanese men can do to find 
agreeable Japanese female companionship.

BTW, the title of this post is "Roman Hikou" (Romantic Flight) implying
this will be a lesson in romance for Japanese men.  I debated whether to
use "CAN Japanese women SAY YES to Japanese MEN?" but SAY YES has been
getting a lot of overkill lately.  Disclaimer: Any resemblance to actual
characters you or I may know is merely coincidental.  And also, any
claim of expertise on my part is purely fictional :-)

Reasons why Japanese Women think Japanese Men have Zero-Charisma
----------------------------------------------------------------
1.  Appearance.  Looks are number 1 in importance because that's
how you attract the first glance.  Women notice little details.
Japanese men who are unsuccessful with the ladies tend to exhibit poor
dress and hygiene.  Poor dress can include things like small stains on
one's tie, poorly tailored off-the-shelf suits, ring around the collar,
tacky mix of wardrobe, holes in one's socks and lack of brighter colours.
Poor hygiene includes things like poorly trimmed finger nails, grungie
eyeglasses with cigarette soot on the rims and joints, tartar buildup on
the teeth and greasy uncut hair. 

2.  Smell.  Okay, Mr. Ojisan may look decent enough to meet, but is he
smelling nice?  Women have sensitive noses and they like pretty smells.
For example, what was the last reaction you got from an OL when you gave
her some potpourri? Uh-huh, she nearly jumped you and did the wild thing
on the spot, right? :-) Well, okay, she didn't jump you and do the
wild thing, but at least she shrugged her shoulders, swayed back and forth
crooning with the potpourri stuffed to her face with both hands...then
she ran and told all the other OL's in the office...Well, you get the
point.  Most Japanese single guys do their own laundry.  In goes the
industrial strength detergent to get out all the cigarette, beer, and
post-10pm densha odours.  The clothes come out either sterile or still 
contaminated.  Then there's the breathe.  Bad breath equals zero
charisma.  A candy doesn't cut it, dudes.  The sugars break down in the
mouth and 15 minutes after the candy is gone, the bad breath comes back
with a vengeance.

3. Lack of omiyage.  Ladies love to receive little gifts.  It's the 
thought that counts.  But typical single dudes stay that way because 
they don't give any thought to omiyage.  For example, I went to a joint
birthday party for two young Japanese ladies. I brought two simple 
bouquets of flowers each with a small silvered mylar balloon saying 
"Happy Birthday."  The Japanese guys were shocked.  And they thought
they were just paying for the drinks.  Hey, wake-up dudes...for a few
bucks more, you could've paid for the drinks and the flowers.  The real
knee-slapper however, was that one of the Japanese guys ran out to a 
late-night flower place and came back hot and sweaty with his own mangled
bunch of organic wildlife.  It was a nightmare/comedy episode of Tokyo
Love Story.

4. Posture.  Hey, most Japanese dudes are already shorter than most
gaijin.  To compound this problem, I see a lot of guys walking around
heads low, staring at the ground.  I'll admit, I stared at the ground 
too when I first went to Japan, so I wouldn't step in all those spit 
gobs the oyajis continually produce.  But thanks to all the rain and 
the fact that you take your shoes off when you go inside a house, there's
little to get paranoid about.

5. Chivalry.  Most Nihonjin dudes really lack in this department.  We're
talking opening doors for ladies, pulling out the chairs, portaging the
zillions of kaimono boxes/bags, etc.  For example.  It was pouring rain
and wet snow last March in Shibuya.  A beautifully kimono clad gal,
obviously on her way to a friend's wedding wanted to get from the 
Williams-Sonoma Hachiko JR exit to the Subway station gate (20 meters)
without having to walk through the now 2 cm thick slush on the ground. 
I waited and watched.  Nobody to help her.  She attempted to ask a gal
if she could piggy back the 20 meters or so.  The kimono clad gal
tried unsuccessfully to get on the other girl's back but was too
cumbersome.  Lots o' Japanese dudes were standing around, but no chivalrous
ones.  Step in Mr. Diajoubui, yours truly  :-) and it became no problem.
None of this wimpy, piggyback fiasco.  We're talking bride-thru-the-
threshold style and she even hung onto her matching parasol.  Of course,
the fact that she weighed less than 50 kg helped. ;-) But you get
the picture...And of course I gave her my meishi and asked for her name and
got her phone number and address...but that's another story.

6. Lousy karaoke.  Most Nihonjin dudes suffer from "jyuu-hachi ban"
syndrome.  One systems engineering dude at a Nihon computer kaisha which
I will keep anonymous just can't get off his Nakayama Miho fix.  "Don't
kiss me...Don't touch me...try to be loved...try to love..." (Nakayama
Miho - "Aishite rutteiwanai" 1990) Every-single-time!  Another dude massacres
"I left my heart in SF" Every-single-time!  And another guy screams "Beach 
Time" (Tube 1986) Over-and-over-and-over.  Variety seems to be the spice of
life.  Karaoke is no exception.  Gaijin present a refreshing change of pace for
many Japanese gals because they can hear the English songs which rarely
ever get sung.  A Japanese guy who sings only a few songs or only songs
of the same genre gets pegged as an unexciting, dull, bland dude.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Those are my 6 top nit-pick reasons why Japanese dudes lose in the
Romance department.  Have I missed any?  Disagreements in my analyses?
Part II of Roman Hikou will be my strategies to solve these problems.

Jaa, James
=======================================================================
James C. Liu |    KARAOKE Addict!     Karaoke: You're the STAR!!!!    |
             |    Wanna go? Need someone who sings worse than you do? |
             |    Know about a cool karaoke bar? send e-mail          |
=======================================================================
Newsgroups: soc.culture.japan