From: cowan@aqua.pc.ocunix.on.ca (Darin Cowan)
Newsgroups: alt.aquaria
Subject: Humour (part 2 of 4)
Date: Wed, 15 Apr 92 13:34:23 GMT
Organization: The Aquarium, Ottawa, Ontario

Day 6: Imagine my relief when the pet store clerk informed

me that the Dwarf Gouramis were merely expressing breeding

symptoms which obviously required the purchase of a new tank

so that they might complete their procreation in peace. I

was painlessly deprived of more money via the magic of my

plastic fantastic. Gaston-4 came home with me that day as

well. (Gaston-3 being so well liked by my two year old that

it had been brought to his bed where it spent the night

among the stuffed bears and a serious lack of oxygen.) Since

I was clearly an accomplished aquarist, it was also

important that I bring home a selection of literature.



Day 8: We were reasonably certain that we had identified no

less than seven fish diseases on our various fish and it was

only after our trip to the pet store to stock up on a

pharmacopia of medicines that the three year confessed to

having dropped "one of two" crayons into the tank. The trip

wasn't a total loss because we did acquire yet another tank

which was to serve as a future quarantine tank. ( Gaston-5,

replaced Gaston-4 -- an unfortunate boating accident in the

bathtub, again compliments of my two year old.)



Day 9: It's hard to truly appreciate how much cornflakes are

actually in a JUMBO ECONO SIZED box until you wake up to

discover that three aquariums are filled with slowly

hardening mush. The two and three year old reluctantly share

joint credit for having fed the fish breakfast. Gaston-5,

alone, miraculously survives leaving behind 14 inches of

fish who ceremoniously are sent off to the great porcelain

heaven.



Day 16: With 78 gallons spread over three tanks we were

destined to spend months in the pet store making careful

decisions about which 78 inches worth of fish that we would

bring home with us. Fortunately, the clerk who was beginning

to treat us like family, suggested a pair of Rope Fish. At

12 inches and 15 inches respectively, it seemed like an

admirable solution. A half dozen Hatchet Fish accompanied us

home, along with a pair of Ghost Knives.



Day 17: I met a rope fish on my way to the bathroom this

morning and my wife's screaming gave clear evidence that she

had encountered the other one in the kitchen. Catching the

one in the bathroom was easy since it rolled conveniently

onto the bathmat and was returned to the tank with a quite

pleasing fuzzy coating of deep purple wool. The Rope Fish on

the loose in the kitchen was a much more difficult

proposition since it sought refuge first under the fridge

and then under the dishwasher but the two year old was able

to lure it into the open with well timed thrusts of the

Dustbuster. When the second Rope Fish was returned to the

tank we were all sure that it's escape had caused mortal

wounds since it had an enormous lump in it's mid-section ...

but the absence of Gaston-5 from the tank strongly hinted at

another explanation.




--
cowan@aqua.pc.ocunix.on.ca             
Darin "Squid" Cowan                  | The Aquarium
Ottawa, Ontario, Canada              | (613) 523-0077  V32bis
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