Newsgroups: soc.culture.indian
From: kbalasub@sparcle.oracle.com (Kris Balasubramanian)
Subject: Re: .... 60.min/dowry....
Reply-To: kbalasub@sparcle.oracle.com
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Inc.
Date: Thu, 28 Jan 1993 18:38:48 GMT
X-Disclaimer: This message was written by an unauthenticated user
              at Oracle Corporation.  The opinions expressed are those
              of the user and not necessarily those of Oracle.

MY GOD, I AM APPALLED AT READING "Seetamraju Udaya Bhaskar Sarma"
justification of DOWRY. This coming from an educated person.  I am disgusted.
What a shame.  I hope and Pray that you goback to India, get married and have
12 daughters, and then comeback to read  your own letter after 30 years.
YOU DUMMY.


In article AA28523@ece7.NIS.ece7, seeta@hub.eng.wayne.edu (Seetamraju Uday Bhaskar Sarma) writes:
>This is in response to an excellent post by Mr. A.A. Siddiqui's post on India - D, and my
>response follows it :-
>
>-+>  Date: 24 Jan 1993 21:56:53 -0400 (EDT)
>-+>  From: "A.A. SIDDIQUI" <siddiqui@uwovax.uwo.ca>
>-+>  Subject: 60 Min./Dowry Story
>-+>  
>-+>  Just finished watching a 60 minutes (CBS) story on dowry related deaths
>-+>  in India.  Well! to put it bluntly, I felt disgusted and thought that
>-+>  perhaps our preoccupation with religious, regional, linguistic and
>-+>  political conflicts is to be blamed for not even talking about this
>-+>  social evil on the newsgroup.  Wouldn't it be wiser if we discuss this
>-+>  outrageous practice and educate people on this subject instead of
>-+>  undermining each others religions.
>-+>  
>-+>  Mahatma Gandhi once said that,"any man who makes dowry a condition
>-+>  for marriage discredits his education and his country and dishonours
>-+>  womanhood.  Young man who soil their fingers with such ill-gotten
>-+>  greed should be excommunicated from society".  Although many Indians
>-+>  concede that dowry is an awful custom because it can lead to
>-+>  impoverishment, indignity and in too many cases to violence, anguish,
>-+>  grief and murder it still continues to flourish unchecked. Why? In my
>-+>  opinion, primarily because it has been an integral component of our
>-+>  social and religious heritage for centuries.  Bigger dowry means
>-+>  family pride and higher social position.  This tradition is unlikely
>-+>  to change in the near future because a large number of people want
>-+>  to preserve it or can envision no way out of it.  But we the educated
>-+>  and perhaps civilized bunch should do something about it.  May be refuse
>-+>  to accept and give dowry?  How about a full page advert in Indian Express
>-+>  or Hindustan Times deploring this practice?
>-+>  
>-+>  Sincerely,
>-+>  Dr. Afzal A. Siddiqui
>
>The Dowry problem will only get worse in india, for the simple
>reason that materialistic ambitions are rising faster than anything
>else, even inflation.   15 Yrs ago, a standard dowry demand was for
>about 40 thousand.  Now that is the minimum, with the standard
>going up to atleast 75,000 with a scooter and ```basic''' family
>necessities like golden watch, fridge, color TV etc...
>
>Ever added all these up?  Can U see the list now include a VCR
>and a good stereo system, and soon, it might even include a flat
>(which is common among the upper middle class).
>
>Materialistic ambitions in collusion with decreasing chances of
>a person ``making it'', purely thru hard work and intelligence
>are the single biggest reason, that people are taking the easy way out
>for a nice life.
>
>Dowry and Dowry deaths are not related.  In any category U pick, U
>will always find fringe elements.  The dowry killers are the fringe
>elements of the dowry problem.  Using them as the sample space
>will only mean, U are grasping the problem at the wrong end.
>
>The normal man wants dowry because in today's VERY-TOUGH-
>to-SURVIVE materialistic world of increasing competition, its
>the easiest way to a happy life.  I actually see no difference between the
>american credit card life and the indian dowry-funded lifestyles.
>
>The american ``charges it'' and works to pay it off later.  The indian
>``gets it from in-laws'' and then works to accumulate an amount for
>the next generation (his daughters)...  Every one has a cushy life exactly when
>they are capable of enjoying the most -- their youth/early married life.
>
>A feasible eceonomic system I should say.  And always, U will find
>a few Ivan Boesky's who will misuse it.   But a major difference lies in that
>stock market fringe elements like Sri. Boesky, didnt kill anyone.  But our
>fringe elements are....
>Concluding ::-  Either, we abolish materialism in india, or we shut up.
>
>Seetamraju Udaya Bhaskar Sarma (email : seetam @ ece7 . eng . wayne . edu)