From: andrewc@spider.co.uk (Andrew Cannon)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Cows part 2
Date: 1 Oct 92 11:22:44 GMT
Organization: Spider Systems Limited, Edinburgh, UK.


Disclaimer: This was'nt me either. You can't prove anything.





                  ...:::///  THE NEW COWS  \\\:::...

             Part 2 of the 2-part COMPLETE GUIDE TO COWS!
                  ________________________
         (__)    /                        \         * OFFICIAL EDITION *
         (oo)   (    Udderly Cool Cows!    )
  /-------\/  --'\________________________/        * SUMMER 1990 ISSUE! *
 / |     ||
*  ||----||             Edited by Eric W. Tilenius
   ~~    ~~             Please send your submissions to:
     Cow                ewtileni@pucc.Princeton.EDU // ewtileni@pucc.BITNET

=  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =
                                    ______
         (__)                       |    |                   (__)
         (oo)                       |    |                   ($$)
      ----\/                  /-----~~~~~~            /-------\/
         ||                  / |     ||              / | IRS ||
      ---||                 *  ||----||             *  ||----||
         ~~                    ~~    ~~                ~~    ~~
 Eric the half a cow     The unknown cowmic         Tax Acowntant


          (___)            (___)             (___)
          (0 0)            (0 0)             (0 0)
           \ /              \ /               \ /
        __[_V_]__        __[_V_]__         __[_V_]__
       /_________\===:  /_________\===:   /_________\===:
       \OOO---OOO/      \OOO---OOO/       \OOO---OOO/

                        Cowed Forces
             \ _ /
            - ( ) -                          /\
             / " \                         /|  |   (__)
             (__)                        /  |  |   (oo)\
     ________(oo)                      /____|  |    \/|  \
    /|        \/                     /       \/       |    \
   / |_______||                   __(_______          |||__  \
  *  ||      ||                  |__________|         |||  ____\---*
     ~~      ~~
 Thomas Edison's cow               Cow hearing his master's voice


           )    (                         _
           (____)                        / \                (__)   ==========I
          / =  = \    ~               =='   `==             (oo)    \ |||||| I
          (-O--O-)    ~                8 O O 8       /-------\/      \ ||||| I
           (    )     ~        /------- (   )       / |     ||__o=<   \ |||| I
  /------- ||||||======       / |     || \_/       *  ||----|          \ ||| I
 / |     ||  \/              *  ||----||              ~~    ~           \ || I
*  ||----||                     ~~    ~~
   ~~    ~~
     Groucho Moo-x                Chico                Harpo

      ______________________            _______________________
      |                    |            |                     |
      |            (__)    |            |  (__)               |
      |            (oo)    |            |  (oo)               |
      |     /-------\/     |            |---\/           /----|
      |    / |     ||      |            |  ||           / |   |
      |   *  ||----||      |            |--||          *  ||--|
      |      ~~    ~~      |            |  ~~             ~~  |
      |--------------------|            |---------------------|
            Normal Cow                  0   Cow  modulo one   1

                  (__)                                   (__)
                  (oo)                                   (oo)
     ______________\/______               ____    /-------\/  __
    /___/___/___/___/___/_/|             /___/|  / |     || _/_/|
    |___|___|___|___|___|_||             |__||/|* //-----|||_|_||
    |_|___|___|___|___|___||             |_|__|/|~~      ~/|___||
    |___|___|___|___|___|_|/             |___|_|/        |___|_|/

    Cow in the GDR before...             ...and after 9-Nov-1989


       ______________(__)_________________                      (__)
     /_______________(oo)_______________ /                      (oo)
     |                \/                ||                       \/
    _|_                                _||                       ||
   /__/_______________________________/__/|                      ||
  (   )                              (   )|                      ||
   | |________________________________| | |                      ||
   \_____________________________________/]              /------- /
    []               []               []                / |     ||
                                                       *  ||----||
                    COW-CH                                ~~    ~~
                                                          Cowraffe

                                              *      *
                                               \    /
                                                \  /
       /~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~\                 \/
     /   (__)                   \           +----------+
    |    (oo) ~~~~~~~~~~~\       |          |          |
   |~~~|  \/. \\       // \_* |~~~|         |          |
   |   |-----`//`====='\\-----|   |         |          |
   |   |-----//---------||----|   |         |          |
   |   |_ _ _"_ _ _ _ _ "_ _ _|   |         +----------+
    ~||~                      ~||~           ||      ||

                         "COWCH POTATO"
                                                 +------------+         +
                                                 | B A T E S  |  (__)   o
                       |    (0x)   (       )     |C O R R A L |  (**)  /|
----------             |     \/    (       )     +------------+  \==/ / |
|\         \                        W------       |          |   (  )   v
|  ----------          *----   ====;                            (    )
|  |  (__)  |           \           /                           (    )
\  |  (oo)  |            \          |                           (    )
 \ |   \/   |              \+       |                           (    )
   ----------                       +                           (    )
    Ice Cowbe            COWBOOOOOM!                             |  |
                                                                 o  o
                                                    Psycho Cow (with knife)
         (__)
         (oo)   -------------------------          _______________________
  /-------\/ - | Don't have a Bart, man! |        |\ ~                ~  /|
 / |     ||     -------------------------         | \    ~      ~     ~ / |
*  ||----||                                       |(_\ ~   COW-PIE ~   /_)|
   ~~    ~~                                       |(oo\   ~           /oo)|
 The Simpsons' cow                                | \/ \       ~  ~  / \/ |
                                                  |(__) \           / (__)|
                \               /                 \(oo)(_\ ~     ~ /_)(oo)|
                 \_____________/                   \\/ (oo\       /oo) \//
                 /\___________/\                    \   \/ \  ~  / \/   /
      Cow in    / /\_________/\ \                    \  (__)\   / (__) /
      trouble  / / /\_______/\ \ \                    \ (oo) \~/  (oo)/
              / / / / (__) /\ \ \ \                    \ \/   :(__)\//
          ___/_/_/_/_ (oo) \_\_\_\_\___                 \ (__):(oo) /
             \ \ \ \ \ \/  / / / / /                     \(oo): \/ /
              \ \ \ \/_____\/ / / /                       \\/(__) /
               \ \ \/_______\/ / /                         \ (oo)/
                \ \/_________\/ /                           \ \//
                 \/___________\/                             \:/
                 /             \
                /               \

          (__)               (__)              (______)             (__)
          (oo)               (oo)              ( o  o )             (oo)
  /--------\/         /~~~~~~~\/          /-----\    /       /-------\/
./ |        |       ./ {~)))))_}         / |     |\/        / |     ||
   |--W-----|          ||``   ||        *  ||----||        *  (.)(.)||
   | |    | |          ~~     ~~           ~~    ~~           ~~    ~~
   ~~    ~~
cow before weight       cow after          Conceited       Dolly Parton's
  loss program         the program            Cow               Cow


                              (___)
                              (  OO
  ______      ______      _____\_ |                 ______  (__) ______
 |      |    |      |    |      |\O    cowstle     |      | (oo)|      |
 |      |____|      |____|      |                  |      |__\/_|      |
 |                              |                  |                   |
 |                              |   (__)           |                   |
 |          __________          |   (oo)           |     __________    |
 |         |          |         |    \/-------\    |    |          |   |
 |         |          |         | ___ | ___  |_\_  |    |          |   |
 |         |   (__)   |         |_| |_|_| |__|| |__|    |   (__)   |   |
 |         |   (oo)   |                                 |   (oo)   |   |
 |          \___\/___/                                   \___\/___/    |
 |                                                                     |
 |                                                                     |
  (                                    ______                         )
   (                                  /      \                       )
     (                               /        \                    )
        (                            |        |                 )
           |                         |        |              |
           |                         |        |              |
           |_________________________|________|______________|
  \ \
   \ \
    \ \
     \ \   (__)
      \ \  (oo)                                                 /
   /---\----\/                                                 /
  / |   \  ||                               *         (__)    /
 *  ||---\-\\                                \        ( OO   /
    ~~      ~~                                \---\___/\_|\=/>
            ~~       ~~                       |        \===/>
             \\_____//                        | /______/  /
             ||     |                 _________\\_\\_____/____________________
             /\------\                          ~  ~    /
            (oo)      \                                /
            (--)       *                              /

Cow Circus: The flying Cowlendas         Cow Circus: Tightrope walking

          ______________________
         |                      |\
         |       (__)           | |
         |       (oo)           | |
         |        \/            | |
         |       / \ \          | |
        /////////   \_ \_///////  |
         |     |     /          | |                           (__)
         |   /++++++<           | |                      _____(oo)
         |==/====|==\=\=========|=|===========================\\/
         | *     |    \_\_      | |                   / |     ||
   _______O)-----~---------------\O)_________________*__||----||_____

                cow-lliope in the circus parade

      *
       \
    w   \    w                                        (__)
    \\  /\  //                                        (oo)
     \\/  \//                                          \/
      |    |                    (__)               >--(  )--<
      |(__)|                    (oo)                  /  \
      \(OO)/                   .-\/-.             >--- {} ---<
      //\/\\                  <|    |>              v  /\  v
      ||  ||                   \ \/ /               | (oo) |
      ||__||                   |\/\/|                \(~~)/
     /~~  ~~\                  /----\                 |  |
   / ======== \               /      \                |  |
  /            \              /* * * \               / \/ \
 |==============|            /__*_*_*_\              |  \ |
  \            /               ||  ||                ~  / ~
   \ ======== /                ~~  ~~                  *
     \ _____ /
Cow balancing on ball          Cowslip            Cownilingus


             (__)                                         -'`-       "Here's
             (oo)     ____________________                ( oo  ~     mooing
      /-------\/     |                    |               /\_|--      at you,
     / |     |\ /    |  o  o  o  o  o  o  |              | \ \__  _   kid!"
    *  ||----| /     ======================              |  \___['
       ~~    ~       ||                  ||              |    ||
       Cowncillor            his cowch                   |____|-
                                                          |  |
                                                          ~  ~
         (__)    (__)   (__)    (__)                 humphrey cow-gurt
         (oo)    (oo)   (oo)    (oo)
  /-------\/      \/     \/      \/-------\
 / |     ||  ===================  ||     | \
*  ||----||   || |--|   |--| ||   ||----||  *
   ~~    ~~   -- ~  ~   ~  ~ --   ~~    ~~            (__)
          A game of cowntract bridge                  (oo)
                                                     / \/       ____________
                                                    /   \===~__|            |
                ----------------------             _|___ /\  |______________|
          (__)  | \-/   \-/    ||    |            |=====| |   |            |
          (oo)  | _|_   _|_   |__|   |            *I   I| |   |            |
   /-------\/   ----------------------             I   I~ ~   |            |
  / |     ||    |   \-/  |   |    |  |
 *  ||----||    |   _|_ |_| |_|  |_| |            wolfgang amadeus moo-zart
    ~~    ~~    ----------------------
           Just a humble cownoisseur


    (__)  (__)   (__) (__)(__)    (__) (__)(__)(__)  (__)
    (oo(__)oo) (__)o) (oo)((__)(__)oo) (__)(o(__)o)(__)o)(__)
     \/(oo)\/  (oo)/(__)/  (oo)(oo)\/  (oo) \(oo)/ (oo)/ (oo)
        \/      \/  (oo)    \/  \/      \/    \/    \/    \/
                     \/
                         a cownfluence

                                                  _______
            (__(  .-<                            |   |   |
            (oo)  |                              |___|___|
          ___\/___|                              |\_____/|
         |  |  |                                 |       |
         |  |  |                                 |_______|
       >-'  |  |                             _   |   _   |
        *----/\                     /-------//   |--(_)--|
            /  \                   / |     ||    |_______|  (__)
           /    \                 *  ||----||    |       |  (++)
           ~     ~                   ~~    ~~    |_______|   \/
        Egyptian Cow                   Marie Antoinette's Cow

                 _
        ________|@|________
         |  POLICE  BOX  |                     __
         |---------------|                   (~\/~)              \(:)/
         |_______|     / |                    \oo/               (o|o)
         ||  |  ||    |  |               /-----\/           /-----\_/
         ||-----||    |  |              /|      |          /|      |
         ||__|__||    |  |             V ||----||         ~ ||----||
         |  ___  |    |  |               ~~    ~~           ~~    ~~
         | |___| |    |  |              Vulcan Cow         Klingon Cow
         | _____ |     (__)
         ||     ||     (oo)    ---------
         ||     ||----//\/ ---< Master? >
         ||     ||B-9  \ |     ---------
         ||_____||______\|
         |_______|_______|
                                                              ----------------
     a Certain Time Lord's Cow                   (__)     ---< EXTERMINATE!!! |
                                                 ( ----0      ----------------
                  (___)                          _\/_
                  |===|                         /oooo\---O
           ________\_/                         /oooooo\
          | |        |                        /oooooooo\
          # ||______||                       /oooooooooo\
            ||      ||                      /____________\
            ~~      ~~
             RoboCow                          a Dalek Cow

   __________________        ___________________        ___________________
  /ine McBovine McBov\      /McCow McCow McCow M\      /ttle McCattle McCat\
 /cBovine McBovine McB\    /Cow McCow McCow McCow\    /e McCattle McCattle M\
------------------------  -------------------------  -------------------------
 \ovine McBovine McBov/    \McCow McCow McCow McC/    \attle McCattle McCatt/
  \McBovine McBovine /      \w McCow McCow McCow/      \ McCattle McCattle /
   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                            Ronald McDonald's Cows

                           @ @
                            @@@ @
                              @@ @
               Pffii           @@@@ @@
         ___________D           @@@@@@
        |________  |            _______
         (__)   | /             \     /
         ( oo /~| |      __      \   /
         /\_|// | |     /  \     |  |
       _/____/__| |    |    |    |  |
      |       ___/-----------------_| (__)
      |      /   \     \     \       `(oo)
      |     /     \     |     |       |\/
      |    |   O  |    /     / __    /
      |----|      |-----------/  \-\\\                 (__)
           \     /           | o |  \\\               _(  )_
    ________\___/____________\__/____\\\_____________/_/__\_\____

                  Cow Express                     Suicidal Cow

                                              o         _____________
                                              /\       /             \
                                             [__]     ( take off, eh! )
     __  |   \ /                             (oo) ----'\_____________/
       \/----///\                     /-------\/
     */\______(xx)                   / |     ||__|
              (  )                  *  ||----|   U
                                       ~~    ~
Pro-democracy cow from Beijing         Canadian Cow


     o          o               o              o             o       o
o  o       o         o       o     o         o   o       o       o
    o   o      o       o       (    )      o    (    )        o  (    (    o
          O                     )  (             )  (             )  (
o  o     (__)     o     o       (__)        o    (__)     o   o   (__)
         (oo)                   (oo)             (oo)      o      (oo)     o
  /------$$$$   o   o    /-------\/  o    /-------\/       /-------\/
 / |     $$$$           / |     ||       / |     ||       / |     ||
*  ||----||        o   *  ||----||      *  ||----||      *  ||----||   o
   ~~    ~~               ~~    ~~         ~~    ~~         ~~    ~~
   Santa Cow and his rein cows caught in a Montana snow flurry

                                        ___
                                      _/...\  *==\        ________________
      __________ (___)               /::::::\  (/_\)     /                \
     /|         `(0 0)               |:::::::_ (o o)     |  Moo, Moo, Moo |
    / |           \ /              /-----+-+--- \ /     /\________________/
   *  |||----|||-/ *              / |    | |   | 0  ___/
      |||    |||                 *  | _  |_| _ |
                                    || --+_+- ||
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Cow           --        --
                                   |  |_     |  |_
          /\                       |____|    |____|
         / O\                         Santa Cows
        / ,  \
       /  O   \                                       _ - ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ - _
       -/ ,  \-                                     /          |~      |~    \
       /  O   \                                    |      |~  o|   |~ o|      |
      /,    ,  \                                 /  \    o|       o|         /
     / O    O   \                              /      \                    /
     -/  ,     \-                             /        / ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
     /   O   ,  \                            /        /          .
    /  ,     O  ,\  (__)                 /*     *\   /         ./\.
   /   O   ,    O \ (oo)                /\       /\           .//.\.
  /        O       \-\/                ****     ****         .///\\\.
  ------------------||                 (oo)     (oo)         ////\\\\.
          ||/ ||----||          /-------\/       \/-------\     ||
          ||  ~~    ~~         /|      ||         ||      |\    ~~
  Merry Cow-ristmas           *  ||----||         ||----||  *
                                 ~~    ~~         ~~    ~~
                                      Christmas Cowols

                               O
                                   O  O  O
                                            O                    *
           Moory Cowristmas!                 ___                /|\
                        _____________________|  |_____         /||o\
                       /______________________________\       /|o|||\
     ~                /________________________________\     /|||||o|\
      ~~  ####          ||   |   ||||||||||||   |   ||      /||o||||||\
         ~(oo)          ||___|___||||||||||||___|___||     /||||o||||||\
   /-------\/           ||   |   ||||||||||||   |   ||    /|o||||o|||o||\
  / |     ||            ||___|___||||||||||||___|__ ||          | |
 *  ||----||            ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||oooooooooo| |ooooooo
oooo~~oooo~~oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo


  |----------------------|                         /\
  |                      |                  /\  /\/  \
  |                      |                 /  \/ /    \/\
  |                      |                /            \ \
  |                      |          ----------------------------
  |______________________|
                                              \/
  |----------------------|                  o-@@
  |______________________|
                                       Minimalist Dead Cow
   ----------------------
      Mark Rothko Cow
                                                     /=`=~~~#&@~@&)|||><<><><>
                                                     \|}}{}{}{() (&)  ~~~~#***
  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |     #\**~~//?<>.+|@@@\/---___
  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |     \|}}{}{/?<>.+|@@*&(*$@))(
  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |     |@#)@(&*)($*I!?$>@$|$|$|$
------------------------------------------------
  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |        Jackson Pollock cow
  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |
  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |         ____________________
------------------------------------------------         |           (__)   |
  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |         |           (oo)   |
  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |         |    /-------\/    |
  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |         |   / |     ||     |
------------------------------------------------         |  *  ||----||     |
  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |         |     ~~    ~~     |
  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |         | Ceci N'est Pas   |
  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |         |    Une Cow       |
------------------------------------------------         --------------------
              Andy Warhol Cow                             Rene Margritte Cow


            oo                    --
                                                           \/


       cow by night       sleeping cow by night        Chesire Cow


                     II
      ( MOOOOOO ! )  II\
  ________\   /      II +    (__) ..oo( Hey, there's a cow driving that car! )
 |\        `v' \      + II   (00)
 | \________|____\     \II\   \/-------\
 | (     ( @ @ )  )     II +    ||    ||\      (__) ..oo ( How can he     )
 |\|______\_O_/___|      + II   ||----|| *     (oo)        ( afford that? )
 | \_______________\      \II\  ~~    ~~        \/--------\
 \ (OO_##########_OO)      II +                    ||    || \
 (\(_____[PHIL]_____)       + II--+--+--+-II-+--+--+--II+--+--+--+II--+--+-
     (_)        (_)          \II          II       ~~ II ~~       II
                              II--+--+--+-II-+--+--+--II+--+--+--+II--+--+-

               What cows think when people MOO at them


           /\\   ~                 (__)                          (__)
          /__\\  |                 ( oo  _                       (oo)
     _    (o o)  |                 /\__|( ) _                   /-\/-\
    / \   /\_/\ /                 |  \==//=(_)  *POW!*         /      \
      | /|I   I|                  | ====                       |      |
      ~/ |I   I|                  |    |                       |      |
      |  |I   I|                 /|  _ \                      /        \
      |  |I   I|               /  / / \ \                     __________\
      |  |_____|             *    ||   ||                          \\
          ~  *~                   ||_  ||_                         (_)

cow giving forgiveness         Moo-hamid Ali                   Cow Bell.


            (!!)                        _/\_                       \_\
    !!!!!!!!(oo)                 _______(oo)              _________(oo)
   !/|       \/                 /|       \/              /| Ferrari \/
  !/ |______||                 / |______||              / |________||
  *  ||     ||                *  ||     ||             *  ||       ||
     ~~     ~~                   ~~     ~~                ~~       ~~
Last of the Moo-hicans        Mayflower cows             Sports Cow


                            (__)                            (__)
                            (oo)                            (oo)
            /--------------- \/              / ------------- \/
          / ( !S M T W T F! )               / (   |7 8 9 +|  )
        /  (  +-+-+-+-+-+-+  )             *  (   |4 5 6 -|  )
       *   (  +-+-+-+-+-+-+  )                 (  |1 2 3 X|  )
            ( +-+-+-+-+-+-+ )                   ( |C 0 = /| )
             (+-+-+-+-+-+-+)                     ~---------~
              ||        ||                       ||       ||
              ||        ||                       ||       ||
              ~~        ~~                       ~~       ~~
              "COWLENDAR"                        "COWCULATOR"

   /\
  /  \         __                           ________   ------
 DOCTOR      _/__\_                           |__| |   |====|
  MOO/      /=(OO)                            (oo) *   |   v|
   \/    --/==-\/==\                   /-------\/      |~~ *|
      / |  \==||  \==\   ///          / |     ||       ------
     *  ||-|==||   \==\/==/          *  ||----||
        ~~ ///~~     \===/              ~~    ~~
       Gallifreyan Cow               Straight out of Cowllege


         (__)
         (oo)
  /-------\/                           #         #
 / |     ||                            \\       //
*  ||----||\                            \\     //
   ~~    ~~ \                            \ --- /
             \                           |     |
              |                          |     |
              |                          |     |
              |                          / \_/  \        (__)
              |                         //      \\    <--(xx)--#-
              |                        //        \\       /\
  ___________\|/___________
        Cow-a-flower                 Cow at butcher's party


         ___--------___             ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
        / .    .   .   \            ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
   |\/   .    (__)    .  \/|        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~oo~~~~~~~~~~~~
   || .    .  (oo) .   .  ||        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
   |/\   .     \/    .   /\|        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
       \___ .    .  ___/            ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
           ---------                ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                                    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
        Cow in a haggis                   Cow on top of Ben Nevis


        ___________________________
       | (__)  (__)  (__)   (__)  |                   *        (__)
       | ( oo  ( oo  ( oo   ( oo  |                    \       (oo)
_______| /\_|  /\_|  /\_|   /\_|  |________             \-------\/
|                                         |              |     ||
|   _____                        _____    |              ||----||
|___|   |________________________|   |____|             (oo)  (oo)
    |___|                        |___|
              Cow-pooling                             rollerscating cow

                             __               o oo o
                            (__)               \||/
                            (__)               (__)              (___)
     (__)                   (oo)               (oo)              (o o)
     (  )            /-------\/         /-------\/        /$$$$$$$\ /
    ( /* )          / |     ||         / |     ||        / $$$$$$$|O
     |  |          *  ||----||        *  ||----||       *  ||w---||
     ~  ~             ~~    ~~           ~~    ~~          ~~    ~~
   Dairy-Air      East Indian Cow       Injun Cow          Cash Cow

                                                                      (       )
              (___)        PRISON#  #  #  #  #                         ||| |||
              (o o)        #  #  #  #  #(_#) #                         (O   O)
  /------------\ /         #  #  #  #  #(o#) #             /------------\___/
 / |           #-#         #  #/-#--#--#-\#  #            / |           |||
*  |         |||           #  # |#  #  #||#  #           /  ||          |||
   ||--------|||           # *# |#--#--#||#  #          *   ||----------|||
   ~~         ~~           #  # ~#  #  #~~#  #              ~~           ~~
  Orville Redencow                            The Bakker Cows


           (__)                                     (__)
         /   oo      ______                       /   @@      ______
        |  /\_|     |      \                     |  /\_|     |      \
        |  |___     |       |                    |  |___     |       |
        |   ---@    |_______|                    |   ---@    |_______|
     *  |  |   ----   |    |                     |  |   ----   |    |
      \ |  |_____                                |  |_____
       \|________|                         *____/|________|

             CompuCow                      CompuCow After an All-niter



             (__)                                   (__)
           /   --      ______                     /  .\/.     ______
          |  /\_|     |      \                   |  /\_|     |      \
          |  |___     |       |                  |  |___     |       |
          |   ---@    |_______|                  |   ---@    |_______|
          |  |   ----   |    |                *  |  |   ----   |    |
          |  |_____                            \ |  |_____
    *____/|________|                            \|________|

    CompuCow Asleep at the Keyboard       CompuCow Discovers Bug in Compiler


      \\                                    \\
       \\                                    \\
       / \                                   / \
      /   \                                 /   \
      \    \                                \    \
       \    \(__)                            \    \(__)
     *-->    (oo)                          *-->    (oo)
       /    / \/                           o /    / \/
      /    /                                /    /
      \   /                             o   \   /
       \ /                                   \ /
       //                                    //
      //                               o    //

  B-2 Stealth Bomber cow         Stealth cow on bombing run


  ___
 /   \       (    )   Happy
|     \       |--|    Mooosic!               (__)
|      |      \  /__                         (oo)
+----------+ __oo| \                  /      -\/                   (__)
|Steinway &|_  \/|  |                /       ||               >----(oo)---->
|___ Sons ___|_/ |__|               *  ------||             /-------\/
|   |        |   / /                   |     ~~            / |     ||
o   o        o  | |                    ||----             *  ||----||
                                       ~~                    ~~    ~~
 Chopin'ing Cow                        TeX cow            Steve Martin's cow


                      (__)                 +=============================+
                      (oo)                 |  F R E D ' S   S A L O O N  |
       ______    ______\/              (__)|          +-----+            |
    __|______\__/____/\\[}             (xx)|          | ___ |            |(__)
   /   ---             \\ ---           \/ |          |/=|=\|            |(oo)
|[]  /     \ \      /   /     \            |          |==|==|            | \/
    |   @   | \____/   |   @   |           |          |==|==|            |
     \     /            \     /        ------------------------------------
       ---                ---
             COW-ASAKI                           Cows behind bars

                 __ _________                           __ _________
                (  V  _   _  )_                        (  V         )_
                /    ( \o/ )   )                       /     ////     )
               (      \_O_/    \                      (     (---)     \
                \      /O\      )                      \    |moo|      )
                 (    @   @    /                        (   (---)     /
                  (_____/\____)                          (_____/\____)
                       o                                      o
                      o                                      o
                    o                                      o
                (__)                                   (__)
           /----(uu)                              /----(uu)
       *__/|     \o==s                        *__/|     \o==s
/\(* \| __ \\----==s  \))              /\(* \| __ \\----==s  \))
     |/))*  | \   )*\||/))//                |/))*  | \   )*\||/))//
            ~  ~\/--\*)                            ~  ~\/--\*)
       Dreaming Cow                         Cow Dreaming of Silage


            (__)      o   o               *        (__)
            (oo)     o  o                  \       (OO)
     /-------\/==o  o                       \-------\/
    / |     ||  ____                    []   |     ||
   *  ||----||  |__|                   (/\)s==|----||
      ~~    ~~                         /__\   ~    ~~
  Cow blowing bubbles.             Cow kicking over lantern that started
                                     the Great Chicago Fire of 1885.

                __//     \__                                  |\__|\
        /~~~)~~/   )     (   \~~(~~~\                         | 00 |
       /(    _(  ~/       \~  )_    )\                   \---<( -- )>---/
      /  \ //  | /         \ |  \ /  \                    \    |--|    /
     /    \   O/           \O   //    \                    \__/    \--/
    (    )/\                   //\(    )                     (      )
    /\  //                         \  /\                     |      |
   / / /W          COW-TOW          W\ \ \                   --------
 *  \(                               )/  *                    ||  ||
      \_                           _//                        nn  nn
  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~           Cow after learning that
                                                      the vice president has a
(__)     (__)         (__) (__)                       lower IQ than he does
(oo)  +  (oo)      =  (oo) (oo)
 \/       \/           \/   \/                                  (__,
                                                                (+o)
(__)     (__)(__)     (__) (__) (__)                 /-----#-----\'
(oo)  +  (oo)(oo)  =  (oo) (oo) (oo)                / | Cownucks||  \
 \/       \/  \/       \/   \/   \/                   }}--------}}   \ o
                                                      ==        ==    --
           Cownting...                             This cow plays hockey


                                                               /.
                                                         moo  /`'\  .
             (__)   MOO!                                   ` /    ./ \..
             (oo)  /                                      ../   .'      \.
      /-------\/                                       ../    /    ../    \
     / |     ||                                      ./     ./   ./        \
    *  ||----||                                    ./     ./            \   \.
-------~~----~~-----                           .../    ../       ../          \
                    \                         /       /         /
                          Ech-cow   (echo)

                 ________________                  (__)
         ~__~   /                \                 (--)s ---mmmmoooooooOOOOOO!
         (oo)  ( Milk is logical. )              __ \O//
  /-------\/ --'\________________/              /   ==s)\_____
 / |     ||                                 *--/|_/-----/    OO       COW
*  ||W---||                                     |__       __ II     JOYRIDES
   ~~    ~~                          O O o  o   /  \-----/  \
Mr Spock's cow                                  \__/     \__/

      *             .                 .    ,
           .           .     *        .      .
                     .                                 *
          \   /         ,        (__)   ,       ,
        -   *   -                (       .      |
      .   /   \     ,       .     \/     .        -   -    .
         .                       / \\        ,      |
        ,      *         *      /   /\\
                   .           /\\ /       .           .
          *           .       /   \\             .         .
    _|_    ,   .    ,        /           ,      *
     |  .     ,       .     *        , .           .
       .    ,     .         .            .  *          .

                           The Milky Way


                      \  /         ________________________________
                       \/         /                                \
               (__)    /\         |    At times likes these you    |
               (oo)   O  O        | REALLY CoVet a proper surgeon! |
               _\/_   //        O \________________________________/
         *    (    ) //       O
          \  (\\    //       o
           \(  \\    )      o                                   (__)
            (   \\   )   /\                                     (oo)
  ___[\______/~~~~~~~\__/) o-)__                                /\/\
 |\__[=======______//________)__\                      Cocown  (\==/)
 \|_______________//____________|                               \<>/
     |||      || //||     |||
     |||      || @.||     |||                            (___)      /~~~~~\
      ||      \/  .\/      ||                            /- -\     /  MU  /
                 . .                                    (  ~  ) __/______/
                '.'.`                                    \_O_/
             COW-OPERATION                             Buddha's Cow


   (_                 ~         -       _)             /       ~
          (           -                        -               |  =s
O                               |            *
                  |           O        \      \       -  |
             |                                   \               |
        -                    -                |

)
       Cow after one too many Pan-Galactic Gargle Blasters.


                                      (__)                ---_
(__) _______________*                 (oo)               /|   \
(xx)-\           \             /-------\/               / |\   \_ (__)
 \/ /-\___________\--\        / |     |                *  ||\     (oo)
                             *  ------                    ~~ \____ \/
       Boneless Cow      No leg cow (ground beef)    Two leg cow (lean beef)


                                 (__)
                                 (oo)
                                  \/                             \___/
                           /     / \\                            (0 0)
                                /   /\\                           \ /
                               /\\ /                               v
                    /         /   \\                               |
                             /                             <-------|------->
                       /    *                                      |
                 |\                                                |
           /     |  \         /                                  __|__
                 \\   \                                          \/ \/
           /       \\   \                                        \/ \/
      /              \\___\                                      \/ \/
            /          \\                                        __|__
               /      \\                                         \   /
 /    /           /        \\                                    |\ /|
            /                \\                                  | V |
        /         /            \\                                |   |
              /                  \\                              |   |
                   /               \\                            W   W
                                     \\
       ===============================O===========        Stick Cow sunbathing
       ===========================================        at Malibu wearing a
        O)                                      O)        special cow bikini.
                   The dreaded cowtapult


    (__)                                (___)            **       ((__))
    (__)               (__)             (___)             \\      ((oo))
    (oo)               (  )             (   )              \\------\\//
   | \/ |             (  /*)            |   |               ||      ||
   |  |             ||  ||            |   |               |||----|||
                                  (___)               ~~~    ~~~
Cows doin' it      Cows doin' it           \_*             Cow during an
 FRONT VIEW          BACK VIEW         TOP VIEW             Earthquake


          ((     _  _                       (___)              (__)
         ( D\   (_)(_)____                  (0 0)              (oo)
   _______\__| | MOOTV____(          /-------\_O---moo        *-\/-------\
  /|     ||   _/\____/              / |     ||               /  ||      |  \
 / ||____| \/~   /  \              *  ||,---||              *   ||-----||   *
*  ||    |      O    O                ~~    ~~               \/|(/)(/\(,,/
   ~~    ~                         Romie mooed...          while Julie ate.
     "Moo-vie Camera"                (The Bard's barnyard inspirations)


                       ______________________________________________________
                      |                                                      |
             _______  |                                                      |
            / _____ | |                       ACME MOO-VERS                  |
           / /(__) || |                                                      |
  ________/ / |OO| || |                                                      |
 |         |-------|| |                                                      |
(|         |     -.|| |_______________________                               |
 |  ____   \       ||_________||____________  |             ____      ____   |
/| / __ \   |______||     / __ \   / __ \   | |            / __ \    / __ \  |\
\|| /  \ |_______________| /  \ |_| /  \ |__| |___________| /  \ |__| /  \ |_|/
   | () |                 | () |   | () |                  | () |    | () |
    \__/                   \__/     \__/                    \__/      \__/

                           "The Moo-vers are here!"


         -- (__)          *        (__)*        (__)*        (__)*        (__)
  *---    - (QQ)           \       (oo) \       (oo) \       (oo) \       (o-)
  -   \------\/             \-------\/ ~~\-------\/ ~~\-------\/ ~~\-------\/
---   |      |               |        //  |        //  |        //  |     ||
  -   ||()--||               ||------+    ||------+    ||------+    ||----||
      oo    oo               ~~           ~~           ~~           ~~    ~~

     Roller Cow                            Cows in polonaise


         -------------/
                     /
                    /
                   /
                 /
                /
               /                                 (__)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ship arriving too late to save a drowing cow (apologies to Frank Zappa)

                                                     \    /          ____
         |\/|                   {___}                 \__/         \/ *  \/
         (oo)                   ( * )                 (--)         | O  O |
  /-------\/ V          /--------\Q/          /--------\/           \    /
 / |     ||__|         / |      ||           / |     ||              \**/
*  ||----|            *  ||-----||          *  ||----||               --
   ~~    ~               --     --             --    --            Milkael
Cow from Vulcan     Smoking 1-eyed cow    Cow w/ rabbit ears      Cowbachev


                        (*)                  (*)
   (__)                  ~                    ~                (__)
   (oo)                  |      |             |               @(oo)@
   [..]                  |      =             |                [..]@@
\ |  U           (-)     |     | |            | (-)             U  @@@@
 ||   ==<_\=====/_|______=_____|=|____________=__|____\====/_>==   ||
 ||   )  ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||  (   ||
 ||___)==||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||==(___||
 |\====| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| |====/|
 |  \  |     |                                          |     |  /  |
 =   * =     =                                          =     = *   =
                   cows having candlelight dinner

                                         (___)
                                         (o o)
    ( ** )                              __\_/__
    |e  e|                             //~~*~~\                  \___/
     \  / ____*===*______*             /   *   \                 (O O)
      OO      * Givenchy *\           / |  *  | \                 \ /
        |    *     *    *  \          \ |=====| /                  O
       /****************    *          "|_____|"
      //  *************                  | | |                Cow exclaiming
     ||    ||     \_/||                  | | |                  "Holy Cow"
     ||    ||     || ||                  |_|_|
     v|    v|     v| v|                   ~ ~
        Haute Cowture                    COWNT

                                        |\
                                        |[]         |\
                                   (__) |           |[]         |\
                                   (--) |      (__) |           |[]         |\
  *                        _________\/ /|      (o-) |      (__) |           |[]
  |        (__)           /,,      ,, /_|_______\/ /|      (oo) |      (__) |
  |      __(oo)        *--------------/,,      ,, /_|_______\/ /|      (OO) |
   \=====  |\/         |           *--------------/,,      ,, /_|_______\/ /|
  _|_/     \_          |===========|           *--------------/,,      ,, / |
  -//\-----/\\         o           |===========|           *----------------|
   \_/     \_/                     o           |===========|                |
-----------------                              o           |================|
    Cowazaki                        COW-WARD               o                o


      ______________________________
     /                              \
    (  Freisian a jolly good fellow! )
     \________________  ____________/
                      ) )                                            ()
               (__)   //                                            (  )
         (__)  (oo)  /          (___)                              ( __ )
        /(oo)---\/              (o o)                               (oo)
  /-------\/   ||                \ /-------\               /-------/||||
 / |     ||----||                 O||     | \             / |     || |||
*  ||----||    ~~                  ||---,||  *           *  ||----||  |
   ~~    ~~                        ~~    ~~                 ~~    ~~
     Two cows COW-ngratulating a bull                    Ayatollah Cow-manhi

                                                  (__)                  |====|
  /--------------------/                          (oo)                   \oo/
 / |     ||           /          (__)      /-------\/             /-------\/
*  ||----||          /-----------(oo)     / |     ||---->        / |     ||
   ~~    ~~                       \/     *  ||----||            *  ||----||
                                           ___/  ___/              ~~    ~~
        Network Virtual Cow                                      Cowcatcher
(with separate frontend and backend)      Cow waterskiing      (Major league)


           /\                                               __
          {__}                                            _[__]_
          (oo)                                            /(oo)\
   /-------\/                                       /------@\/@
  / |  +  ||                                       / |     |@@
 *  ||----||                                      *  ||----||
    ~~    ~~                                         ~~    ~~
   Sacred Cow       Zen Cow (eating grass)          Hasidic Cow

  _____          _________________
 /     \        /                 \
( 1+2=3 )      ( 1+SIN(2x)+COS(3x) )
 \__  _/        \_____  __________/                         (__)
   ( (                ) )                                  >(==)
    \\                //       )__(                        /-\/-\
      \    (__)      /         (oo)                       /(    )\
           (oo)                 \/-------*               ~ (    ) ~
    /-------\/                   ||     | \                (    )
   / |     ||                    ||----||   \              /----\
  *  ||----||                    vv    vv                 /    \ \
     ~~    ~~                                            ~      * ~
  COWculator (2)               Reverse Polish Cow        Cow-a-bunga

                                                         ~~    ~~
                                  O  (___) ||         *  ||----||
                                  |  (o o) ||          \ |     ||
            (no-bull-ity) --->    %  -\ /- ||           \-------/\
                                  |\/| O | ||                  (oo)
                                  |  |   | ||                  (  )
                                     / v-' ||                   ><
                                 /==========|                  (  )
                                //         ||                  (oo)
  ,------._(__)                 ||         ||           /-------\/
 * | \     ( oo                 ||         ||          / |     ||
vv====>----=\/====vv            |===========|         *  ||----||
                                                         ~~    ~~
                    COWTOW                            Bi-cow molecule

                                 (__)                 (__)
        ()  ()             _____| oo |                |oo|
         ()()             /          |         /----|-|__|-|
         (oo)            /           |        / |     ||
  /-------UU            /____________|       *  ||----||
 / |     ||                ~~    ~~             ~~    ~~
*  ||w---||            Cow dressed up        Cow dressed up
   ~~    ~~              as ghost            as Frankenstein
Eh, What's up Doc?     for Halloween          For Halloween


         (__)                                |\/|               (__)
         (oo)                                (oo)              >(==)
   __[_]__\/                          /-------VV         /-------\/
 / |     ||                          / |     ||         / |     ||
*  ||----||      -->   .            *  ||----||        *  ||----||
   ~~    ~~                            ~~    ~~           ~~    ~~
 Portable Cow    Japanese model       Lycownthropy      Cow-a-bunga (2)
 (very handy)    portable COW

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
               |
   -------     | This concludes the second part of THE COMPLETE GUIDE TO COWS.
   | COW |     | Please distribute this file WIDELY on BBSes, etc.  It is in
   -------     | the public domain.  ((THANKS TO ALL WHO CONTRIBUTED COWS!!))
               |
Iconified Cow  | Please send me your COWS for the next edition!  When drawing
               | cows, please DO NOT use tabs - use only "real" spaces.
---------------'
           Cowments?  Cowntributions?  Send them to the editor...

   Eric W. Tilenius // ewtileni@pucc.Princeton.EDU // ewtileni@pucc.BITNET

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

- ERIC -             <ewtileni@pucc.Princeton.EDU>


-- 
|      Andy Cannon       | All spelling and grammatical mistakes portrayed |   
| Misplaced Yorkshireman | in this post are my own. Any resemblance to any |   
|   Spider Systems Ltd   | other mistakes, both living and dead, is purely |  
|  andrewc@spider.co.uk  | coincidental.                                   |