From: rip@sequent.com (Paul T Taylor)
Subject: Re: FOOD FIGHT
Organization: Sequent Computer Systems Inc.
Distribution: na
Date: Thu, 10 Sep 92 06:16:10 GMT

Lonnie the Rat writes:

>In article <tvechins.920909104120@eng.auburn.edu>, tvechins@eng.auburn.edu (Toni R. Vechinski) writes:
>> Shadowette sits down next to Rat.

**bunch of junk deleted**

>  "Uh-Oh" mumbles the Rat. "Here come trouble!!"
>As he says this, Rip begins firing mercilessly upon the crowd.  Both
>the Rat and Shadowette, as well as everyone else, is soon covered in
>an array of toppings, icecream, nuts and banana's.  As Rip drives his
>BST out the east wall, the Rat turns to Shadowette and says:
>
>  "I think we found our next victim..  He does make a good banana split,
>however I'd rather be eating it and not wearing it."  The Rat and Shadowette
>begin contemplating how to get Rip for covering them in butterscotch,fudge,
>ice cream, nuts, etc...

Rip, sitting in his den, back at Ripmanor, suddenly perks his ears up.
It seems someone, or someones, is/are plotting against him.

With a deep sigh, (they never learn), Rip gets up from his easy chair,
(easy, but not cheap), flips her a Benji, (woof), and dons his dinner
jacket.  After all, he *was* headed back to the Cafeteria to teach
these upstarts a lesson in the fine art of FoodFighting, *and* a
lesson in manners on respect for thier elders...

In a short few minutes the Websters pulls up to the *front* of the
ARCBuilding.  Walking through the FireSide room, he nods his head to
his friends, old and new.  Suddenly a pang runs through him as he
passes the vacant chair where his dear Li'lBro LF used to sit,
spinning all those horrible puns, and dirty ditties.

"Ah, if only he were here, we could *really* show these upstarts a
thing or three...." In the true spirit of BrotherHood, Rip girds
his loins, thanking the PowersThatBe(tina) he has his AtomoCodPiece,
and prepares to make his entrance into the Cafeteria.

Curious gawkers follow, knowing in their heart of hearts that what
has come so far is just a warm up for what is about to happen.

Slowly the door to the Cafe opens.  Sensing that something wonderful,
or terrible is about to happen, the revelers, once again, stop in
their tracks.  Rat, Shadowette huddling in a conspiratorial huddle
conspiring all kinds of nasty things to do to Rip.

As soon as they figure out that they are the only ones in the room
who are making any noise, their heads *pop* up to see Rip, his cold
eyes staring at them, seeming to penetrate to their very souls, a
shiver goes up Rat's spine.  The Shadowette's shadow fades a bit.

Slowly and with much flourish, Rip pulls out a small bag from behind
his back.  A gasp rises from some of the onlookers who have been
around for awhile.  For, you see, before he left, lf left Rip his
BagOTricks.... (some of you will know the implications of this!)

Slowly, agonizingly, and with that some you-know-what eating grin on
his face, Rip pulls out an ACME portable hole.  Rip tosses the hole
on the floor.  Cocking one ear, he tosses a small pebble into the
hole.  After what seemed like an eternity, a small *sploosh* is
heard.  Rat gives a small 'gulp'...

Again Rip reaches into the BOT, this time coming up with a fullsized
Zamboni.  The FoodFighters slowly part as Rip fires up the large
piece of machinery, and starts riding it around the room sucking up
all the muck, and gooieness from the floor.  Soon the floor, and
walls are spotless, (yes, this particular Zamboni rides on the walls,
remember, *anything* is possible in ARC!).  Driving over to the hole,
Rip flips a lever, and the entire contents of the room are now
deposited into the hole, filling it completely.

For the final time, Rip reaches into the bag and pulls out two
snorkles, and face masks.  Nonchalantly, he flips them over to were
Rat and Shadowette are standing, mouths agape.  Lifting up a corner
of the floor, Rip jerks it up and down real fast.  Just like in a
cartoon, the floor ripples like a piece of wet spaghetti.

When the ripples reach Rat and Shadowette, they are tossed in the air
and fly right toward the hole!  Quickly, showing a strange presence
of mind, the couple realize what the snorkles are for and quickly don
them just as the hit the full pool filled with chocolate,
marshmellows, bannanas, syrups of various flavors and colors,
floating nuts, and other various and sundry items.

*SSSSPPPPPLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOSSSSHHHHHH!!!!!!!!*  the couple land!  A
large fountain of gooie mess is thrown into the air.

Amidst thunderous applause, Rip bows and slowly backs out of the
Cafeteria and back to the FireSide lounge.  There he flips a salute
to the empty chair, graps a cup of hot chocolate and sits down to
write the second part of the 'Untitled Story'.....


______________________________________________________________________
                                                      _____
Rip                                 rip@sequent.com  /     \
Official Palanquin Bearer                           /  rip  \
For the Secretaries                                 |xxx-xxx|
Of the RFA                                       ___|_______|___
And BigBro to LF, 'Chelle, HotDi,                    \~ ~~ ~\
Lis, Garrett, Michelle and GypsyII (whew!)            \~~ ~~~\
Help!  My karma ran over my dogma, and it can't get up!!