HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: sdc@nsscmail.att.com (Sheryl D. Chapin)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re; Farrow and Allen
Date: 21 Aug 92 15:59:59 GMT
Distribution: na
Organization: NCR Systems Support Center - New Jersey

>
>Allen's admitted affair with Farrow's adopted child is "a violation of
                              ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
>the order of things.  The taking-car generation has violated the
>generation they are supposed to be taking care of."  Adds psychologist
>Shirley Glass:  "We are upset; we have a sense of that violation."
>
>Woody Allen might be completely innocent of the allegations of sexual
>impropriety with his minor children.  However, he admits to
>improprieties with his adult step-daughter.  There's the rub.  Many
>
>Oftentimes the allegations arise out of hysteria, paranoia, and a
>complete lack of trust.  Woody Allen violated Mia Farrow's trust by
>seducing his step-daughter.  Mia surely loves all her children equally
>
>I could be completely wrong about my initial limited beliefs in this
>case.  A strong argument against those beliefs are that Woody admits to
>an affair with a step-daughter.  That societal dictate that says such
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
>an affair is not morally acceptable by most people, is and was known to
>Woody at the time he committed those acts.  Some people believe, if you
>will cross one border, why not all?



Soon Yi is Farrow's adopted daughter, not Allen's, Farrow and Allen were 
never married, Soon Yi is not his step daughter, adopted or other wise, there
is nothing legally or MORALLY wrong with this relationship except some people
can't handle the idea that he had a relationship with both the mother and the
daughter.  This has nothing to do with child molestation and unless Soon Yi
comes forward and says its been going on for 11 years, I don't see a connection
with child molestation. 

As far as I'm concerned, nothing has been proved against Allen, and I believe
innocent until proven guilty and quite frankly, after what you went thru, I 
would think you would be a little more open minded.



Sheryl (Max's Mom)
-- 
"That is my opinion and I am unanimous in that!"
It was only for kicks cracks and flacks plicks and placks and plickers--
Lackplacker Lackplicker loundwadtti Daago--Nickers flickers lackplicker--
Kicks flicks plack and ack lackflacmac ack ack macflackack ---Roscoe Mitchell
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: mhn@cs.brown.edu (Marian H. Nodine)
Subject: Re: Whole milk verses 2%
Organization: Brown University Department of Computer Science
Date: Tue, 18 Aug 1992 16:36:27 GMT

In article <16846AEF3.M18611@MBVM.Mitre.Org> M18611@MBVM.Mitre.Org (Kathy Wilk) writes:
>  Seems to me I read somewhere that kids need the fat not just for
>the calories - something that has to do with the nervous system...

Nerve development in children continues until they are about 9.  Basically,
when a baby is born, all the nerves are in place.  But in order to
function properly they need to develop a myelin sheath -- apparently,
the thicker the myelin, the faster the nerves can transmit signals.
Milk fat contains some of the essential building blocks for myelin.

From what I have heard, the last bit of myelinization occurs fairly
late -- like age 9, and is usually in the nerves that transmit signals
for peripheral vision and also some stuff required for hand-eye
coordination.  This is why, for instance, many 7-year-olds cannot
reliably catch a softball thrown directly at them.

Disclaimer:  I am not a biologist, a neroscientist, or a doctor.  Just
a silly computer scientist ... 

-- Misty
From: lauraf@classy.Jpl.Nasa.Gov (Laura Floom)
Subject: Re: How to have a smarter baby?
Organization: Jet Propulsion Laboratory, Pasadena, CA
Date: Wed, 19 Aug 1992 20:35:08 GMT

In article <TIGGER.92Aug19115439@satyr.Sylvan.COM> tigger@satyr.Sylvan.COM (Grace Sylvan) writes:
>
>It's not teaching so much as sharing the baby's experience and adding
>to it. Seeing the world through a baby's eyes can be very refreshing.
>It's amazing the things you will see. I remember the first time Kayvan
>carried Katherine over to a tree trunk and she patted it and touched
>it in wonder.
>

I agree! This thread has come up many times before and almost always from
a person who is about to become a parent. Anyone who has had a child will
soon realize that it not necessary to teach young children - they will teach
you. Thier minds are little sponges and not yet prejudiced by the world. They
learn from everything, and you will learn to look at the world in a different
way. It would be a pity to ignore this in favor of Dolman's or anyone elses
agenda. I cant say for sure that they are mutally exclusive, but my gut feeling
is the more you try and 'teach' your child, the less they will learn on their
own.

My new inlaws were in town this week, and they wanted to spend as much time
with their new (and first) grandchild. Most days they just stayed in the
hotel. I have never realized how wonderful a hotel is, until I heard all the
different areas a 2.5 year old can find amusement.

Laura Floom
From: snorthc@nswc.navy.mil (Stephen Northcutt)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Talk talk TALK talk
Date: 18 Aug 92 13:29:40 GMT
Organization: NAVAL SURFACE WARFARE CENTER

My kid, Hunter has just turned 8 yr old.  He is going through a
most amazing time of development and I wonder if anyone has experienced
anything like it.  From the time he wakes up in the morning, till he
goes to bed he talks and chatters non-stop.

Yesterday, I sent him around the block with our dog, I *needed* just a
few minutes quiet, and I could hear him making hawk sounds all the
way around the block.

With his playmates he seems to be having two conversations, one with
them and then one of just non stop sound.

For all the statements about intolerant christians I have read lately,
he even babbles during church... with a visiting pastor... people were
starting to stare... some kind soul just commented, sounds like he
is speaking in tongues :-), hmmmmm.

My major fear is this Thursday, he is taking his test for his brown
belt in Tae Kwon Do.  His technique is picture perfect, honed over
three years practice, I can just see the panel of masters wonderment
as this 8 yr old comes blasting at them full of force and focus, babbling
all the way.

Its a phase, yeah that's it, a phase, gotta be.
===================================================================
               12 more shopping days till school starts
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: marcy@sqwest.wimsey.bc.ca (Marcy Thompson)
Subject: Re: Second Baby Thoughts ...
Organization: SoftQuad Inc., Surrey, British Columbia, CANADA
Date: Wed, 12 Aug 1992 20:12:31 GMT

In a recent misc.kids article, rice@cray.com (Jonathan Rice) wrote:
>
>My point was that the adjustment from six hours a day of "free" time to
>two is a good deal more severe (and traumatic, for one is not used to making
>such changes) than the adjustment from two hours to one.  Thus giving lie to
>the cliche that two is "more than twice as hard" as one.

I think this is a matter of opinion. Everybody has her own personality.
Everybody has a minimum amount of time they have to have alone. For some
people, it's very close to zero hours a day, in which case "free" time
is a luxury, and going from six hours of free time to two hours *is*
more traumatic than going from two hours to one hour.

For other people, the critical amount of time alone is more like 90 minutes
a day. If people like this don't get that amount of time alone, they become
terminally cranky and eventually can't function. For a person like that,
going from two hours of free time a day to one hour of free time *is*
more traumatic than the bigger drop was.

You can always tell those people because they are the ones who will
sacrifice sleep to stay up alone at night. Or they work strange hours
so that they are totally alone for part of the day. Or they figure out
some other strategy to give themselves that kind of time alone.

I mention this because Alison has always needed that kind of time, ever
since she was very small. It doesn't even matter much what she's doing.
On school days, it makes a terrific amount of difference to her whether
she does her homework in her room, with the door closed, or whether she
does it at the kitchen table while I clean up from dinner and other
peope are wandering in and out. If the latter, then she retreats to
her room after doing her homework. If she does her homework alone, then
she joins the family afterwards. And in both cases, she'll be doing the
exact same thing.

Please note that when I talk about "free" time, I am not necessarily
talking about time that is squandered away on doing "nothing". Alison's
"free" time can be spent doing homework, for instance. Perhaps a better
term is "alone time". 

Anyway, I think that for a person who has a high need for time alone,
being a single parent would be even more difficult than it already is.
And for a person with one or more adult partners, having a high need
for alone time could still make it true that having two children *is*
much more difficult than having one.

Marcy

-- 

Marcy Thompson		
  SoftQuad (West)			
    marcy@sq.com
From: joanne@hpcc01.corp.hp.com (Joanne Petersen)
Date: Thu, 20 Aug 1992 17:41:43 GMT
Subject: Re: Birth control during breastfeeding?
Organization: Hewlett-Packard PAITC Data Center
Newsgroups: misc.kids

I've received several requests for a summary of the information that's
being e-mailed to me, so I'll post it (no names, as requested) after the
mail traffic has died down (probably next week).  Thanks for all the
suggestions so far!  

Also, to those folks who asked me to e-mail the summary -- I managed to
accidentally remove your mail addresses so I can't e-mail to you.  Hope
you won't mind just reading the summary posted here instead.

From: joanne@hpcc01.corp.hp.com (Joanne Petersen)
Date: Tue, 18 Aug 1992 22:59:17 GMT
Subject: Re: Waterbeds
Organization: Hewlett-Packard PAITC Data Center
Newsgroups: misc.kids

I've slept on a waterbed for both pregnancies (I'm in my 8th month now
with the second :-) and wouldn't give it up for anything in this world!
I don't need any special pillows or other adjustments.  The waterbed is
a wonderful cradle for pregnant moms!  I haven't had any trouble getting
out of the waterbed either, but then again I'm used to it and we also have
a platform-type frame (so I don't have to get up from floor level).

After Kiri was born, I slept on a hard (futon) bed because my body was too
sore to be able to easily get in and out of the waterbed (and also because
my husband decided to paint the bedroom since we weren't going to work....
but that's another story).  I got back to the waterbed after a few weeks. 

We never had troubles having Kiri on the waterbed; we rarely let her sleep
with us there, so whenever she was on it we were awake and watching her.
Nowadays (she's 2-1/2 years old) she loves to sleep on the "moving bed".
(And we're considering getting her a waterbed when she's old enough to be
toilet-trained -- imagine, we don't have to worry if she has any accidents!
:-) 
From: joanne@hpcc01.corp.hp.com (Joanne Petersen)
Date: Tue, 18 Aug 1992 22:52:53 GMT
Subject: Re: Potty Training in 1yr old ?
Organization: Hewlett-Packard PAITC Data Center
Newsgroups: misc.kids

I've sent the toilet training FAQ, so no one has to remind me to do this....
:-)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: staffan@ca.serum.kodak.com (Kenneth Staffan (x37507))
Subject: Re: Question about Encyclopedias
Organization: Clinical Products Division, Eastman Kodak Company
Distribution: usa
Date: Mon, 17 Aug 1992 18:29:28 GMT

>>My wife and I are expecting our first child, and like a crazy, over concerned
>>father, I've already been on the search for the perfect school, the perfect
>>place to live to bring up children, the perfect car, the perfect car seat,
>>etc., and am coming to the point of wondering what the perfect encyclopedia
>>and educational materials might be.
>
>The most perfect encyclopedias the ones in the library.  They get nice new
>updated ones every year or so, and so few people use them that YOU migh be the
>one cracking open the binding for the very first time.
>
>Otherwise, plan to spend upwards of $1500 (or $50 a month for the next
>I-could-pay-off-my-car-faster many months) for your own set that won't
>contain tomorrow's headlines.

Good points.  Sometimes it is nice to have reference materials in the home,
though.  I think one of the more economical ways to get an (adult-oriented)
encyclopedia is to first wait until the child is at least starting to read
(since they are continuously becoming more out-of-date).  Then, search
the used bookstores for a pre-owned set.  If nothing appropriate is found
(all too old, too pricey, etc.), then tell the owners that you are in the
market, so that they will know to watch for sets during their buying 
trips.  You'll still end up running to the library for more up-to-date
info (though the rural branch from my childhood certainly didn't have 
new encyclopedias).

Of course, if money is no object, a new set would be nice.  You also then
get (or can buy) the yearly update subscription to keep them as up-to-
date as is practical.

Ken
---
staffan@serum.kodak.com
From: jj@alice.att.com (jj, curmudgeon and clueless old white boy)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: What to do with a late talker?
Date: 20 Aug 92 16:28:25 GMT
Article-I.D.: alice.23497
Reply-To: jj@alice.UUCP (jj, curmudgeon and clueless old white boy)
Organization: NJ State Home for Bewildered Terminals

In article <92232.124431IO81409@MAINE.MAINE.EDU> IO81409@MAINE.MAINE.EDU (Ailsa N.T. Murphy) writes:
>well, katy was a late talker, and i was nervous as anything about
>it, as my mother-in-law was constantly "humorously" implying that
>she was retarded, and it began to get to me.  she talks fine now,
>has a vocabulary well beyond her years, and these days the
>trick is to get her to STOP talking.  could be your daughter doesn't
>want to talk unless she can do it RIGHT.

There might be something to that.  Ours clearly understood language
fairly early, and quite well, but wouldn't even attempt
to speak for a long time other than exclaimations like
Ma Ma, or Da DA, or "WAHHHH" to get our attention, although
she would pantomime well.

Now, well, she speaks better Mandarin that I do (not a major
accomplishment, but how well it sticks in a kid!) and her
English is accumulating what seems like a few words a day.

Still, it came VERY fast, and after, it seems, she could actually
make use of it.

Who knows what goes on in the mind of a 2.25 year old?
-- 
 Bush    *Copyright alice!jj 1992, all rights reserved, except transmission
   vs       *by USENET and like facilities granted.      Said permission is
 Clinton  --    *granted only for complete copies that include this notice.
 Just Say !NO!       *Use on pay-for-read services specifically disallowed.
From: riggle@adobe.com (Kathleen Riggle)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: How about changing 'difficult' to 'challenging' ?
Date: 12 Aug 92 17:21:15 GMT
Organization: Adobe Systems Incorporated

In article <1992Aug12.134052.9410@crd.ge.com> dudding@sallyride.NoSubdomain.NoDomain (Kate Dudding) writes:
>My son went through a difficult period when he entered kindergarten, and I
>took a parenting course (similar to STEP).  At the first class, the facilitator
>asked us to describe our family and our challenging child, the one who had
>brought us to our knees and prompted us to take the class.  I found the term 
>'challenging' much nicer than 'difficult'.
>
>I also have a challenging nephew who has a perfect older sister.  
>For me, they're both very enjoyable kids in their different ways. 

I'm sorry; I didn't see the original post, so this may not be
appropriate, but it does followup what Kate is saying.  I just
recently picked up a book called "Raising Your Spirited Child by Mary
Sheedy Kurcinka.  She has labeled children that are considered
"difficult" as "spirited".  She basically says what Kate has said: that
labeling a child positively is better than "difficult" or "intense"
("Intense" is what we usually call Rachel.)  Now, some people will say
that you shouldn't label your children; that their labels become
self-fulfilling and that can be true, but when you are dealing with a
child that is "more" (more intense, more active, more sensitive), I
feel that you need some sort of label just to keep your sanity!  When
Rachel was a newborn, all the books said she would sleep a lot.  Well,
she didn't!  She was up for hours and hours and she wanted to be held
upright and walking.  I think perhaps she was bored and wanted to see
what was going on.  It was exhausting.  After about 4 weeks of this, I
found a book by Penelope Leach that described wakeful babies.
Basically, you had to treat these newborns as if they were older
babies; talk to them, keep them in the center of the family; don't try
to put them down for naps all the time, etc.  Well, being able to
label Rachel as "wakeful" helped me to accept her and focus on what
she needed.

I want to review the book after I finish reading it completely; it
really seems well organized.  The book describes behaviors that can be
thought of as "spirited."  When I think spirited, I think active, but
a child like this doesn't have to be overactive.  They can be very
quiet and focused.  This is Rachel.  It describes the difference
between spirited children and children with ADD.

There are also a lot of positive traits of spirited children.
Perception, for example.  They hear things and see things that pass
other people by.  This explains in part why they don't always "hear" a
parent; they are having to decide what is more important; the message
from the parent of the bell they hear ringing outside.

Kathie
-- 
riggle@adobe.com
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: CREECH@LSTC2VM.stortek.com (Teresa Creech)
Subject: Re: "Love" Triangle
Organization: StorageTek SW Engineering
Date: Mon, 17 Aug 1992 19:30:24 GMT

I think that as long as you keep entertaining Matthew and keep feeding the
kids lunch, you will continue to be taken advantage of.  If you don't feel
like talking to the parents (It is awfully difficult to say "You are not
good parents, you don't watch your kids properly" or "You are taking
advantage of us." without making the neighbors mad.), you can set some rules
to limit the amount of time that the neighbor kids are at your house.
 
For example, when lunch time rolls around, say (firmly):  "Laura has to eat
lunch now, you have to go home.  Laura will come get you if she can play
this afternoon."  Or when the kids come to the door at 9:30 am say "Laura
isn't ready to play yet.  Maybe she'll come get you later."  Hopefully the
parents will take the hint.
 
Matthew is another problem.  I really don't think that you should have to
be entertaining him.  I think that the entertainment is the main reason he's
at your house - he gets no attention at home.  I fell sorry for him, but it
is not YOUR job to raise the NEIGHBORS kids.  Raising your own is hectic
enough!!!  It also isn't fair to the girls to have to play with Matthew all
the time.  Our rule is that if you are outside or at daycare, you have to
play with everyone - it isn't fair to exclude someone.  If my kids want to
invite someone over (inside), it's ok to play with just that one person, as
long as they are tactful about the invitation.
 
It is a shame that Matthew doesn't have playmates his own age in the
neighborhood, but he does need to learn that sometimes his sister will do
something without him.  Maybe if you didn't entertain him he might learn this
on his own.  If he is starting school this fall, you can invite Katie over
while he is at school.  When he is home, don't invite the kids inside.
 
Good luck.
Teresa
 
PS I had another idea.  Would the parents get the hint if you phoned and said
   "Laura would like to know if Katie can come over to play.  If this is ok,
   I'll send her home at x o'clock."  This implicitly leaves out Matthew
   and tells Katie's mother that the visit is for a certain period of time.
   Maybe she would take the hint and start calling you if the kids wanted to
   play.
 
** 'flame' on******************************************************************
 
I hope that this post is calm and rational.  I am really angry.  I can't
believe that the mother or father wouldn't automatically call the kids home
at lunch time!!!  It makes you wonder if they are fed, etc, properly at home.
(I am not a perfect mother - I know that, but I do take care of my kids.
Lunch may not be great or wonderful, but I do feed them.  I would never
depend on a neighbor to feed them.)  I can't believe that the father plays
video games all weekend.  He should spend some time playing with his kids,
especially Matthew.  Why did these people bother to have kids?  Looks like
they'd be happier without them.
 
* 'flame' off ****** now I feel better ****************************************
From: hamachi@adobe.com (Gordon Hamachi)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: Baby Monitor recommendations
Date: 13 Aug 92 17:46:57 GMT
Organization: Adobe Systems Incorporated

V. Stern writes
> I have picked up the neighbors from 
> time to time, and I sure wouldn't want them to hear some of the stuff that 
> goes on in our house sometimes! :)

A friend with a sophisticated radio receiver claims he can easily tune in on  
signals from baby monitors all over his neighborhood, and hear EVERYTHING going  
on in their homes.

I live in a 2-bedroom apartment and have found the baby monitor to be almost  
useless.  When the baby cries, you'll know it.  A monitor might be useful if  
you have a large home or spend a lot of time outside, far away from the baby.

--Gordon Hamachi
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: bl213@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (K. C. Kelly)
Subject: Re: Cradle Cap (was: Hair washing)
Organization: Case Western Reserve University, Cleveland, Ohio, (USA)
Date: Mon, 17 Aug 92 17:00:59 GMT


My kids had cradle cap for just the furst few weeks while their
skin was peeling all over like so many newborns do.  I believe
most baby oils are still made of mineral oil which isn't good to
use because it leeches minerals from the body so I used a small
amount of vegetable oil and rubbed it in gently with a washcloth
to loosen the scales, let it sit for several minutes (the books
recommend leaving it on overnight but that would require washing
bedding, clothing, the baby's face, my clothing, etc. the next
day!) and then wash out with shampoo.  I imagine for those babies
with lots of hair it would take several shampoos to get the oil
out.