From: elf@halcyon.com (Elf Sternberg)
Subject: NightTalk
Originator: elf@halcyon.com
Reply-To: elf@halcyon.com (Elf Sternberg)
Organization: Pendor, UnLtd.
Date: Wed, 26 Aug 1992 07:57:42 GMT

In article <1992Aug25.104739.7456@u.washington.edu>
     wadlow@anton.music.washington.edu (John Wadlow) writes:

>Now, with all this in mind, when I got home I turn on the tube (couldn't  
>sleep) and started watching "NightTalk" with Jane Whitney, a TV talk show  
>(I forget the network it is on) and the topic was going *straight* after  
>being gay.  They had a gay and lesbian (with their spouses) who ended
>up giving up this lifestyle and getting married.  They also, had a
>phycologist (I believe the name was Nicolosi) who said he had personally
>help transform 200 gay men into happily contented straight men.

   *Sigh.*

   Josef Nicolosi was the subject of a 20 / 20 investigation recently.
Let's talk a little about him.

   "Homosexuality can never equal heterosexuality.  It is qualitatively
inferior; the homosexual is not fully human.  It's my aim to fix that."
                                            - Josef Nicolosi.

   Nicolosi is a licensed psychologist  and therapist in the State of
California.  He is not a psychiatrist; he is not permitted to dispense
drugs or perform medicine.

   Nicolosi claims to have transformed 200 gay men.  This statistic is
misleading.  Investigations of Nicolosi's (including interviews with
his success cases) reveal that ALL of these men, without fail, continue
to have homoerotic impulses, continue to fight them, and continue to
see Nicolosi for treatment.  What his "success" means, basically, is
that he's convinced these men to give up sleeping with men and to try
sleeping with women.  He hasn't cured them of homosexuality, per se.

   The young man Nicolosi commonly brings with him onto stage, it has
to be pointed out, is a member of the Unification Church of the
Reverend Sun Myung Moon.  He is, in fact, a common proseletyzer for the
Moonies.  He was _ordered_ by the church elders to give up his
homosexuality, and he went to Nicolosi for that.  In interviews _he_
still admits to having homoerotic impulses and dreams, but he fights
them "for his wife and his faith."  It should also be pointed out that
his marriage was ordered and arranged by the Moonie Church.

   Finally, there is a condition listed in psychology as "Ego-Dystonic
Homosexuality." _All_ of Nicolosi's patients are suffering from this
condition.  What EDH is, essentially, a condition where a patient
cannot reconcile his homosexuality with his personality.  For
_whatever_ reason (upbringing, religion, or other) this person cannot
feel comfortable with his homosexuality.

   If a patient has trouble with his homosexuality, generally it is the
therapists duty to try and comfort the patient.  Distress over the
"bar and nightclub" image of gays can be alleviated by introduicing the
patient to other gay organizations, such as athletic organizations or
gay-friendly religious organizations.  If, however, the patient
fervently wishes _not_ to be gay, then he or she has EDH.

   _All_ of these patients _went_ to Nicolosi because he told them what
they wanted to hear.  "I can rid you of your homosexuality."  That's an
important point-- nobody forced these men to go to Nicolosi; in the
end, they all _want_ to be there.

   But, even with the desire, even with the therapy, _all_ of these men
are still more interested in men than they are in women.  They are all,
essentially, denying their strongest impulses in the name of some
other, personal goal.

>Some things really nerved me like the reference to homosexuality to
>alcoholism...

   There is a disproportionate account of alcoholism and drug abuse in
the gay and lesbian community.  The answer for _why_ this is has
nothing to do with homosexuality; it has to do with the fact that gays
and lesbians feel pressure everyday... pressure to conform, pressure to
hide.  A recent study showed that gay/les alcoholism is often linked to
a desire to releive self-imposed pressure, pressure to live up to
perceived standard from their parents, standards they can never match
because they're not straights.  Gays and lesbians and bisexuals burn
out because they have so much more to contend with, and the lights that
burns brightest burns so very fast...

>The psychologist [also said] that 100% of gay men can't have
>a monogamist relationship over 5 years (I know this isn't true cause
>I've seen studies that say the contrary) but it still caused a lot of
>emotional upsets in me.

   Understandable.  Remember, though, that Nicolosi's statistic there
_is_ complete bullshit.  Remember also that monogamy is a personal
choice among us here; he's using a "cultural buzzword" (monogamy) in
the way that religious bigots ask you if you're "saved," "washed," or
"found," in the hopes of MAKING you feel upset.  You're letting this
man, who has already admitted to hating you for what you are,
manipulate you by pointing out that you don't fit in.

   Be proud of what you are, John!  Don't let your enemies tinker with
your heart.

>I needed to get all this out of me.
>*hugs*

   'Sokay, we're here to listen!  *Hugs* and *Licks* back!

>john a wadlow

         Elf !!!
-- 
Elf Sternberg    __   |     I have looked into the abyss, and the abyss
elf@halcyon.com  \/   | has looked into me.  Neither liked what we saw.
elf@polari.online.com |                              - Brother Theodore