HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: pat@sphinx.phys.Virginia.EDU (pat walsh)
Subject: Re: Abortion is Stealing! (was Re: DATELINE: Bush fucks up!)
Organization: University of Virginia Physics Department
Date: Tue, 8 Sep 1992 19:58:04 GMT

Kurt Ludwick writes:

>pat@sphinx.phys.Virginia.EDU (pat walsh) says:

>>Somebody already pointed it out a week or two ago, but it bears repeating.
>>The key phrase in GHHB's answer was "well, who else's choice would it be?".
>>This is the very definition of the pro-choice position.

>No.  The pro-choice position states that we should accept whatever decision
>a person makes, regardless of whether it's right or wrong.  I would hope that
>the distinction is an obvious one.

To what distinction are you referring -- the distinction between your
definition of pro-choice and mine?  If "a person" in your definition refers
to the pregnant woman in question, I don't see any direct contradiction
between the two -- I have merely chosen not to address the question of right
and wrong.  And for damned good reason -- if the rights and wrongs of abortion
were obvious and well-defined, the matter would have been settled long ago.
And, depending on the outcome, either we wouldn't be seeing the confrontations
we now see taking place around abortion clinics -- or we wouldn't see the
clinics at all.

In the meantime, who is to decide what is right and what is wrong w/r/t
abortion?  Well, for starters -- considering our government's mixed record on
questions of right and wrong (treatment of indigenous populations, slavery,
WWII internment camps, to cite a few of the embarrassing stains on this
record), I don't feel inclined to leave the decision in the government's hands.

Finally, I realize it was a bit presumptuous of me to offer a definition
of pro-choice, and for that reason, I'll leave it for the folks in
talk.abortion to decide what is the "right" definition.  I'm also going to
leave this discussion to those folks, so I can get back to more important
matters -- like Dan Quayle :-).

- Patrick Walsh
  University of Virginia Department of Physics
  pw@virginia.bitnet, pw@virginia.edu, pat@gomez.phys.virginia.edu
From: browns@ccu.umanitoba.ca (Stuart Brown)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: Dan Advertises for Murphy Brown Reruns!
Date: 14 Sep 92 19:54:19 GMT
Organization: University of Manitoba, Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada

In article <BuF7uE.DEH@mail.boi.hp.com> rdetweil@boi.hp.com (Richard Detweiler) writes:
>In article <BuDvnr.3wL@nic.umass.edu> jennyg@titan.ucc.umass.edu (Jenny Gutbezahl) writes:
>>In article <lav3dsINNtl@mizar.usc.edu> biddleco@mizar.usc.edu (Susan Biddlecomb) writes:
>>
>>>
>>>Can anyone think of any other standing President or Vice President who has
>>>made a TV commercial (besides campaign stuff) while in office?
>>>
>>>Susan
>>>
>>
>>Well, Nixon appeared on Laugh-In.  Does that count?
>>
>>
>
>And didn't Gerald Ford do a Mary Tyler Moore show?

I distinctly remember Gerald Ford on Saturday Night Live - playing opposite
Chevy Chase doing his Gerald Ford impersonation.  Did this happen? or am
I just remembering a late 70's fantasy of my own?a


-- 
Stuart M. Brown                             If you can remain cool when all 
U. of Manitoba, Dept. Plant Science         Around you are in panic,
Winnipeg, Manitoba, CANADA
browns@ccu.umanitoba.ca            Then you surely misunderstand the situation
From: sieferme@milton.u.washington.edu (Eric Sieferman)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: A Simple Question
Date: 8 Sep 92 15:46:11 GMT
Distribution: na
Organization: University of Washington, Seattle

In article <1992Sep8.135545.26002@murdoch.acc.Virginia.EDU> rwd4f@poe.acc.Virginia.EDU (Rob Dobson) writes:
>If George Bush is the next Harry Truman, what is Dan-O?
>
>Chopped liver?
>
>-rob
>

One of FDR's Vice-Presidents (Garner, I think) said that the 
job of VP was not worth a bucket of warm spit.  Little
did he know that one day, the VP would actually be
the President's spittoon.
-- 
| Eric Sieferman            |    sieferme@u.washington.edu          |
| U. of W., M.C.I.S.        |    (206) 685-3104                     |
From: dbj@cs.washington.edu (Dave Johnson)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: Einstein's brain.
Date: 4 Sep 92 21:05:18 GMT
Organization: Computer Science & Engineering, U. of Washington, Seattle

In article <1992Sep4.182731.9386@tcsi.com> jansen@tcs.com (David Jansen) writes:
>In article <Bu1wE4.Hy1.1@cs.cmu.edu>, alexo+@cs.cmu.edu (Alex Orenshteyn) writes:
>|> 	Somewhere in this country there is a fellow with a medical
>|> degree who got hold of Einstein's brain after the poor chap died.
>|> This medical man from time to time slices off pieces of the brain
>|> to find out just what made Einstein a genuis. I wonder whose brain
>|> he is going get next? Heh, Heh.
>|> 
>|> 
>
>I hear Einstein brain slices are going for $5000 / milligram.  On the other hand,
>Quayle slice futures are already being offered at $100000 / milligram to the many
>scientists curious about this marvel of nature.
>
>This seems surprising until you figure how many slices of Quayle brain are 
>required to make a milligram.

No, it's just that it's hard to find an unused brain.
-- 
  Dave Johnson

"You're not too smart, are you?  I like that in a man."
    --Kathleen Turner in Body Heat 
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: sieferme@milton.u.washington.edu (Eric Sieferman)
Subject: Re: Clinton Screws Up! Press Reports It!
Organization: University of Washington, Seattle
Date: Fri, 11 Sep 1992 18:46:56 GMT

>In article <mjenkins.716220983@cunews> mjenkins@alfred.carleton.ca (Michael Jenkinson) writes:
>>
>> STUFF DELETED...
>>
>>Ditto. Give it a rest with the Quayle-bashing. No man or woman
>>deserves the hell he's gone through for the past four years. 
>

Well, actually, hell is:
* trying to raise a family of four, without a spouse, on
$12,000 per year.
* trying to find a new job at age 55 after the plant you worked
at for 30 years has closed.
* watching your schizophrenic parent wander the streets because
the funding for indigent mental patients has been slashed.
* seeing a friend die a miserable death because he can
no longer afford his AZT prescription.
* dropping out of school because tuition has doubled and
financial aid has been halved.
* watching a "smart" bomb (or is it a cruise missle?) destroy
your neighborhood, everything you own, and everyone you love.

Hell is NOT:
* visiting world-class golf courses at public expense.
* enjoying the adulation of millions.
* being cheered and welcomed all over the country.
* having one's pronouncements taken seriously, no matter
how inane they are.
* travelling all over the world and meeting all sorts
of interesting people.
* knowing that one has a comfortable pension, fully paid
health care, and a variety of other benefits guaranteed by
law and funded by the US treasury.

To be fair, hell MAY BE:
* married to Marilyn.

So, I guess, everyone has a cross to bear.
-- 
| Eric Sieferman            |    sieferme@u.washington.edu          |
| U. of W., M.C.I.S.        |    (206) 685-3104                     |

Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: mvp@netcom.com (Mike Van Pelt)
Subject: Re: worthless comic strips
Date: Thu, 10 Sep 92 23:48:06 GMT
Organization: Netcom - Online Communication Services (408 241-9760 guest)

In article <10679@sun13.scri.fsu.edu> pepke@ds1.scri.fsu.edu (Eric Pepke) writes:
>A reasonable analogy might be if Doonesbury were to have a long shot of the
>White House with a balloon saying, "Hey!  Let's invade Iraq so we can stiff
>some ragheads!"  It wouldn't really be funny no matter what your political 
>opinions.

What do you mean "if"?  Doonsbury regularly features that sort of
humor.  The "invisible George" stuff, the "invisible except for
levitating white feather Danny" stuff, the "In Search of Reagan's
Brain" series.  Trudeau can by hysterically funny, and often is, but
just as often, he spews hatred onto the comic page and calls it
'humor'.  He seems incapable of being funny about the people he hates.

The "R U 4 stiffing the kid" comment was (1) at least a decent
pun, and (2) isn't a repeated-until-it's-lost-whatever-humor-
it-may-once-have-had "joke" like the "Invisible George".
-- 
Mike Van Pelt                          Here lies a Technophobe,
mvp@netcom.com                            No whimper, no blast.
mvp@hsv3.lsil.com                      His life's goal accomplished,
                                          Zero risk at last.
From: rdetweil@boi.hp.com (Richard Detweiler)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: Name That Weapon (was Re: "I can even forgive Bush...")
Date: 9 Sep 92 20:59:54 GMT
Distribution: na
Organization: Hewlett Packard - Boise Printer Division (LAFS)

In article <D39PBM4B@cc.swarthmore.edu> () writes:
>
>> (P.S. -  Anybody got an idea how to do a deer-in-the-headlights smiley?)
>
>How's this: 8-|
>

Not quite:   }8-|
From: cortez@milton.u.washington.edu (Tom Warner)
Subject: Re: Danny & I at the shuttle launch
Organization: University of Washington
Date: Tue, 15 Sep 1992 14:35:10 GMT

sieferme@milton.u.washington.edu (Eric Sieferman) writes:

>I noticed that the shuttle got into orbit OK, so 
>the Dandroid could not have been too close to the launch.

>If being in the proximity of Our Boy does this to an otherwise
>coherent person, this explains Marilyn pretty well.

>BTW, isn't one of Dan-o's many duties (busy, busy, busy...)
>is to be on some sort of Space Advisory Council or some
>other science-related committee?

Yes, our own Provost here at the UW is a member of said council.

I presume he got the position after demonstrating his thorough understanding
of Planetary Astronomy, especially the surface and atmosphere of Mars.

>This election year should be full of Quayl-sightings.
>All those fortunate enough to gaze upon the Visage of Dan,
>let us know!


Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: cortez@milton.u.washington.edu (Tom Warner)
Subject: Re: CIA
Organization: University of Washington
Date: Wed, 9 Sep 1992 19:02:19 GMT

rocko@ireland.NoSubdomain.NoDomain (Rick O'leary) writes:

>In article <1992Sep9.060155.3977@athena.mit.edu>, yuna@athena.mit.edu (Yuna Huh) writes:
>|> 
>|> Does anyone know what Bush did while he was the director of the CIA?
>|> 
>|> Yuna Huh


>What ever he wanted to.

here's a few:

-- Gave Manuel Noriega a raise.

-- Obstructed the House Select Committee on Assassinations at every turn

-- Kept Somoza in power



A
From: madhaus@netcom.com (Maddi Hausmann)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: Dan Advertises for Murphy Brown Reruns!
Date: 10 Sep 92 18:57:59 GMT
Organization: Society For Putting Things on Top of Other Things

Quayle flacks 'Murphy Brown'

Orange County Register

LOS ANGELES--Dan Quayle has become a TV pitchman--for "Murphy Brown."

After sitting for an hourlong interview Tuesday morning on the KTLA
morning news, the vice president agreed to participate in a promotional
advertisement for KTLA's weeknight reruns of "Murphy Brown."

In the spot, KTLA morning news co-anchor Barbara Beck asks the vice
president, "So, what's your favorite TV program?"

Quayle ponders the question for a moment before replying with a
scripted, "'Murphy Brown'--not!"

Another version of the promo has Quayle responding to the same mock
query with "Murphy Brown on KTLA/Channel 5--not!"

Yes, he even did it twice.

KTLA spokeman Ed Harrison said it isn't certain when the Quayle promos 
will run, adding that the vice president was "a very good sport" in
agreeing to cut the spots.

--taken from today's (10 September 92) San Jose Mercury News.

Or, he could learn to play the saxaphone.

-- 
Maddi Hausmann                madhaus@netcom.com
Humorist, Satirist, Tech Writer.  Take your pick.

Centigram Communications Corp, San Jose California  408/428-3553
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle,alt.politics.bush
From: sieferme@milton.u.washington.edu (Eric Sieferman)
Subject: Re: Rush Limbaugh fans F*ck up! We get 1000s of articles!!
Organization: University of Washington, Seattle
Date: Mon, 14 Sep 1992 17:13:15 GMT

In article <1992Sep11.210628.6513@murdoch.acc.Virginia.EDU> rwd4f@poe.acc.Virginia.EDU (Rob Dobson) writes:
>(1000s of articles by 1000s of posters deleted for the sake of Quaylehood)
>
>WHY?!? WHY?!?! WHY?!?!
>
>I dont mind mocking george bush in a.f.d-q, but rush limbaugh is a
>little much.
>
>Why do so many people cros post so many articles to so many groups???
>

Why does my dog pee on every tree and bush (sic) in the neighborhood
when he goes for a walk?  Same answer.

>/limbaugh/h:j
>
>rob, and i was hoping not to have a killfile for a.f.d-q

Shh!  Don't use the word "kill" when speaking of d-q;
the Secret Service may grab you and throw you to the ground!
But I don't think Rush Lameboy has S.S. protection, yet.

-- 
| Eric Sieferman            |    sieferme@u.washington.edu          |
| U. of W., M.C.I.S.        |    (206) 685-3104                     |

Xref: sparky alt.fan.dan-quayle:3399 alt.politics.bush:4229 alt.politics.clinton:4216
From: cindy@solan10.solan.unit.no (Cynthia Kandolf)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle,alt.politics.bush,alt.politics.clinton
Subject: Re: "I can even forgive Bush for Dan Quayle, but not for this."
Date: 6 Sep 92 19:17:18 GMT
	<1992Sep5.021321.13823@ttinews.tti.com>
Organization: /home/ludviga/cindy/.organization

Bob Smart writes:
>No word as to what a commercial flight would be called if, by some
>strange circumstance, the President were aboard.

"Potential Terrorist Target One"?  

If that's too long, i would suggest "Bomb Bait One".  Has a nicer
ring to it, anyway.

-Cindy Kandolf
 cindy@solan.unit.no
 Trondheim, Norway

You can't get to heaven on the Frankford El.
Organization: Arizona State University
Date: Friday, 4 Sep 1992 17:12:15 MST
From: <AIVAB@ASUACAD.BITNET>
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: The SS watches YOU! (was Re: Tucker's e-mail
 <1992Aug30.211143.8503@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu>
 <1992Sep1.025320.5238@athena.mit.edu>
 <13576.2aa2d4bd@ohstpy.mps.ohio-state.edu>

In article <13576.2aa2d4bd@ohstpy.mps.ohio-state.edu>,
vancleef@ohstpy.mps.ohio-state.edu says:
>
>Harasing the Tuckster is likely to get you in deep shit with the US
>Zecret Zervice. Seriously. I wouldn't touch this one with a 10-foot pole!
>
>
Of course you must realize that the (paid to be)paranoid Zecret Zervice
already has the names, adresses, telephone numbers, shoe sizes and
sexual preference info on anyone who has EVER dared criticize, disagree
with or even mention the Danster in public.  I am near-certain that
this group is read regularly by ZZ types, and that hundreds of little
manila files with ALL OF OUR NAMES on them are sitting in some putty
colored file cabinet somewhere, regulary added to every time someone
posts here.  No need to bother TQ to get your own private government
file.

RoniB
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: dks@MIT.EDU (dks)
Subject: What Kent said about not suffering fools any more
Date: Sat, 12 Sep 92 13:42:38 EST
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X-Command: Send_AEvt(doAutoForward)



In article <1932@celia.UUCP>, steve@celia.UUCP (Steve Tyree) whimpers
after being brought up short for his blatherings:
> Thank you. I have been wondering how long it would take for someone to notice
> this. And I will continue to do it. I learned how to tweak elitist from RUSH 
> and Danny Boy.


Tweak this, son.


Dhanesh

  What Kent said.

Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: dks@MIT.EDU (dks)
Subject: What this country needs is a good, five-cent Sendero Luminoso...
Date: Tue, 15 Sep 92 21:19:55 EST
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Ever had days when you just sat there wondering
what it must be like to be Dannikins?


Dhanesh

Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: pat@sphinx.phys.Virginia.EDU (pat walsh)
Subject: Name That Weapon (was Re: "I can even forgive Bush...")
Organization: University of Virginia Physics Department
Date: Wed, 9 Sep 1992 14:41:54 GMT

Bob Clements writes:

>>Dan Quayle was on Headline News this morning pointing out Clinton's confusing
>>Cruise Missiles and Patriot missiles.  He made a joke about Clinton's
>>knowledge of defense being as bad as his knowledge of spelling.

>Yes, and this morning's news (ABC, I think) pointed out that Danny was
>wrong, too, because the described weapons were really the smart bombs,
>not cruise missiles.

Hmmm...there's material here for a good line about Dan Quayle and smart
bombs, but unfortunately I'm drawing a blank...  :-(

(P.S. -  Anybody got an idea how to do a deer-in-the-headlights smiley?)

- Patrick Walsh
  University of Virginia Department of Physics
  pw@virginia.bitnet, pw@virginia.edu, pat@gomez.phys.virginia.edu
From: elendil@mintir.new-orleans.la.us (Edward J. Branley)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Limbaugh reading Murphy Brown script on air...
Date: Mon, 14 Sep 92 19:31:26 CDT
Organization: Minas Tirith BBS (Public Access Usenet for New Orleans)

Did I hear correctly?  Did the 'epitome of morality, virtue, and good taste,'
Rush H. Limbaugh, read excerpts from the 'Murphy Brown' season opener that is
supposed to be in response to remarks made by Our Boy?

Hmmm...looks like Rush 'Mr. Morality' Limbaugh isn't so moral when it comes to
receiving stolen property and reading it on his radio show.  Say it ain't so!




>Edward J. Branley         elendil@mintir.new-orleans.la.us<
>Seashell Software, Metairie, LA            +1-504-455-5087<
Xref: sparky alt.fan.dan-quayle:3743 talk.bizarre:30161
From: echeverr@scf.usc.edu (5150)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle,talk.bizarre
Subject: Simple Math (Was Re: Quayle Season)
Followup-To: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Date: 14 Sep 1992 21:52:18 -0700
Organization: <censored>
NNTP-Posting-Host: phakt.usc.edu

In article <1992Sep14.200406.15663@cco.caltech.edu> peri@cco.caltech.edu (Michal Leah Peri) writes:
>Just what is his shoe size, anyway???

Where:
S = Danoe's shoe size
IQ = WHat's left of Danoe's mind
h = Danoe's hat size

Prove:
S = h / IQ


5150
From: Frederick.A.Ringwald@dartmouth.edu (Frederick A. Ringwald)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: You think *Dannikins* has a cross to bear?
Date: 14 Sep 92 10:50:51 GMT
Organization: Dartmouth College, Hanover, NH
X-Posted-From: InterNews1.0a5@newshost.dartmouth.edu

In article <1992Sep13.113225.7549@athena.mit.edu>
dks@athena.mit.edu (dks) writes:

> > To be fair, hell MAY BE:
> > * married to Marilyn.
> >
> > So, I guess, everyone has a cross to bear.
> 
>   To be fair, Hell may also be:
>   * married to Dannikins.

Come now, be fair. Those two are MADE for each other!

(Besides, if it is hell to be married to Marilyn, Dannikins is too
stupid to realize it!)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle,alt.politics.elections
From: rdetweil@boi.hp.com (Richard Detweiler)
Subject: Idahoe Miscellany
Summary: Polls, Quotes, and the Dannster
Date: Mon, 14 Sep 1992 14:43:03 GMT
Distribution: na
Organization: Hewlett Packard - Boise Printer Division

Hi all,

Some political news from Idaho:

1. The latest poll taken in late August.

	Margin of error: 4.5%

	Bush		43%
	Clinton		41%

2. Because of the tightness of this race in what should be a lock for the GOPs,
the Dannster will be here in South Idaho today first visiting the potatoE
processing plant owned by J.R. Simplot, our resident billionaire who owns all
the Idaho potatoEs and is our biggest Republican Sugardaddy.  Our Man is then
going to speak at a rally here in Boise.

3.  The Boise paper, the Idaho Statesman, ran a telephone survey over the 
weekend asking the question, "How will Dan Quayle's visit to Idaho influence
your voting decision?"  The results this morning from a total of 387 calls:

		More likely vote republican:	23%
		More likely vote democrat:	61%
		No effect:			16%

(Is Dan's campaign money coming from the Democratic National Committee now?)

4.  To put everyone's mind at ease who might be thinking Idaho has taken a 
dangerous turn towards Godless Liberalism, this morning's paper also had a
story stating that the Chairman of the Republican Party for northern Idaho
has disavowed the candidacy of George Bush stating "One candidate is a Democrat
and the other is an out and out Socialist!"  (I think that makes Geo. Bush the
Democrat, yes?  Someone help me here.)  The paper said he plans to vote 
Libertarian.


Dick Detweiler : rdetweil@hpdmd48.boi.hp.com

(Yes, I KNOW the poll wasn't scientific.  Yes, I KNOW a phone-in poll doesn't
mean anthing.  But it looked great on the front of Idaho's answer to McPaper. )
From: eric@tantalus.dell.com (Eric Youngdale)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: Don't make fun of Quayl's math.
Date: 14 Sep 92 16:02:54 GMT
Organization: Naval Research Laboratory

In article <wall-140992113849@elvis.swarthmore.edu> wall@cc.swarthmore.edu (Matthew Wall) writes:
>> The counter employee walked quickly into the back room and asked someone in a
>> very quiet voice,
>> 
>>    "How much is one sixth?"
>
>Ha ha. Reminds me of a time I asked for a pint of draft beer in a Boston
>sports bar, and the waitrees said "we don't have pints, just 12 ounce and
>16 ounce sizes."

	Reminds me of one time when I was in a supermarket buying whole-bean
coffee.  The checkout girl asked me if I wanted it grounded.

-Eric

--
Eric Youngdale
eric@tantalus.nrl.navy.mil