HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: li@Data-IO.COM (Phyllis Rostykus)
Subject: Re: Definition of "monogamy"?
Organization: Data I/O Corporation
Date: Thu, 24 Dec 1992 22:56:57 GMT

In article <1992Dec24.183204.21457@netcom.com> aahz@netcom.com (Mean Green Dancing Machine) writes:
>Okay, the problem in alt.poly started when someone introduced themselves
>as being currently involved with two people, yet having a preference for
>the monogamous lifestyle.  Another person flamed them for using
>"monogamous" incorrectly, and the rest is history.

They still do that, do they?  The Net is *still* a stickler for usage...

>Let's start with emotional monogamy.  I love my parents, I love my
>sister, I love a lot of the people I know from this Place -- in what way
>is my love for Stef really any different?  Why shouldn't I share a
>similar kind of love with many other people?  Note that I do recognize
>that there's a time-based component to love: you can't really love
>someone as *intensely* when you spend less time with them, and the
>*quality* of the love also changes.

Yup.  

So your love for Stef *is* different, if only in the intensity and the
quality of it.  Just as my love for John *is* different than my love for
other people simply because he and I spend so very much time and effort 
together.  He and I have gone through a *lot*.

But I also agree that it's neat to love other people, too.  Perhaps they
aren't *quite* as close as your Stef is to you, but it is still some
emotional committment and some emotional energy.  Hmmm... I guess I'm not
for absolutely inclusivity anymore than I am for absolute exclusivity.  As
in I can't pretend to think that I'll love *EVERYONE* equally, nor do I 
say that I can't love anyone but my One-and-only.

Chuckle.  Again, extremes/Ideals aren't any good in a real-world situation.
It's a balance.

>Physical monogamy makes more sense in a way.  Still, hugs and backrubs
>are OK :) -- so where do you draw the line?  Anything you can do with
>clothes on?  No intercourse?  How do you determine the difference
>between a friendly "hello/goodbye" kiss and a romantic one?

You can tell only when your partner tells you.  :)  The way John and I
work this is sorta like how Jason and Pegasus work theirs, the other one
sets the limit.  As in if John's uncomfortable with anything, I don't do
it.  If I'm uncomfortable with anything, he doesn't do it.  Just ask.

The crux of the problem may be interrelational communication.  How to
communicate what feels bad, what feels O.K., what is *really* needed, 
what can be waited on, and what can be done without.  

-- 
Phyllis Rostykus    | "... and how you feel can make it real  | - _US_
aka Liralen Li      | Real as anything you've seen            |   Peter
li@Data-IO.com      | Get a life with this dreamer's dream."  |   Gabriel
From: rowanf@crc.ricoh.com (Rowan Fairgrove)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Spheres and Calculus [Re: Cyber (was Introduction was Eh?)]
Date: 22 Dec 92 20:44:54 GMT
Reply-To: rowanf@crc.ricoh.com (Rowan Fairgrove)
Organization: RICOH California Research Center


In article <1992Dec19.234517.5334@ucc.su.OZ.AU> DM writes:
>
[deletia]
>
>DM is surprised. "Don't you folks in the US learn calculus in high
>school? 


korz@cs.columbia.edu (Frederick Korz) replies:

[deletia]
>  For the mathematics and the sciences, they compressed 2 years into 1
>and thereafter simply threw you in with people a year ahead of you.

Frood, at least they let you get the material somehow.  I was
outraged that I couldn't take calculus.  My school system
(Virginia) had 

9th   -  Algebra I
10th - Geometry
11th - Algebra II
12th -  Trigonometry

*However* if you got tracked into middle school Algebra I
you could take Geometry in 9th and end up with Calculus.
I came in from out-of-state for high school (from Panama) and
there was no way provided to get into the honors math classes
if you hadn't been <properly> tracked in middle school.

Who knows, I might have been a physics major instead of an
archaeologist if I could have handled the maths.  My Algebra I
teacher was psychotic also which didn't help my learning curve
any.  My geometry teacher was a monotonic and soporific 
speaker.  Algebra II I remember not at all (can it have been worse!)

Trig was a blessing.  That year I went to a Summerhillian school
and the same fellow taught Trig, Calc and Physics and he taught
the maths you needed to do the physics.  It all made sense there
for a year.  

I did take college trig and did quite well.  Then I took statistics,
that raised my anxiety level just too high to keep going.  Its the 
only time I have felt compelled to write at the bottom of an exam
(on which I actually got an A-) <if you pass me, I promise I will
not take the next class>  And I didn't.  Never took any math again.

:-(

Rowan Fairgrove

*****************************************
The wheel of the year is turning now.  The season of darkness stretches before us like a great and sunless sea.   Listen:  the stag bells, the summer has gone.  Winter winds blow wet and cold, the sun is low, short its course, the sea running high.  Deep red the bracken, its shape lost; the little wren finds no shelter for her nest; the wild goose has raises its familiar cry.
*****************************************
From: wgarmil@world.std.com (Wayne S Garmil)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: WildCard returns yet again
Date: 30 Dec 92 23:02:23 GMT
Organization: The World Public Access UNIX, Brookline, MA


The door swings open, and WildCard tries for the third time in three months to
fully return to the Place.  Going over to the bar, he gets his current
favorite: a hot chocolate.  Sipping, and enjoying the warmth it brings him,
WildCard (time-travelling superhero and former Dr. Who companion, for those of
you who don't knwo me) heads over to his table by the fire.  Like it has been
for the last year, it is no longer empty, but occupied by his close friend who
he met here in the Place a year ago (Hi, Donna!).

Unfortunately, Wayne (hey, who says a superhero can't reveal his real name to
the people he trusts?  And patrons of Callahan's Place definately qualify as
trust-worthy.) forgot he packed up his semi-portable computer the last time he
left here.  "Oh, well", he sighs.  "Guess I can't repost what I've go so far of
Paradox, my WildCard/Quantuum Leap story."

Sitting down, he pulls out a copy fo Gurps Callahans.  "It's out, for those of
you who don't know. The author did a *very* nice job on it.  I can get copies
for those of you who want them.  Sorry, byut you'll have to pay the cost of
cover price and snail mail.  I'm not rich.  Yet. :)"

Sitting back, Wayne opens the cover and enjoys.

P.S.  My work now has email flowing, and we'll get a news feed next month.  You
can email me at work as "uunet!bgs!wayne"



-- 
   _     __  _      __                    Remember:  The WildCard always stacks
  ' )   /   //   / /  )            /      the deck in his favor.  Anyone care
   / / / o // __/ /    __.  __  __/       for a game of strip poker?   My deal.
  (_(_/ <_</_(_/ (__/ (_/|_/ (_(_/_             (wgarmil@std.world.com)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: cliveg@cix.compulink.co.uk (Clive Grace)
Subject: Re: Definition of "monogamy"?
Reply-To: cliveg@cix.compulink.co.uk
Date: Thu, 31 Dec 1992 12:28:00 +0000


"I don't think so at the moment -- but thanks". Tanais smiles 
gratefully at Mary (and her Merry tail), "I'm still at the mourning 
stage -- where we have to feel what we have lost and to feel the fear 
and understand our uncertainties for the future? I'll not be a party 
pooper either, but what I wrote, took something out of me... telling 
people always does... I think I need to feel the loss and then get on 
with living.".
    Tanais' right ear swivels around to hear a voice speak up, it's the voice of Mon 
Templar, it's in his direction, so he turns more of his
body to slowly look. Kateri and Kitten are both skritching each ear 
(as they had asked) and a gentle purr begins to rumble from within 
Tanais. It's too low for many to hear over the hubub of bar-room 
chatter, but it's there.
--
+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+
| When I grow up, I want to give up being   |cliveg@cix.compulink.co.uk|
| a Journalist and learn how to write...    |                          |
+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+
|       Bisexual knitter of quality and distinction since 1992.        |
+----------------------------------------------------------------------+
From: S.S.B.Glover@bradford.ac.uk (SSB GLOVER)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Season
Date: 25 Dec 92 00:22:21 GMT
Organization: University of Bradford, UK
Originator: 92909131@muser

A Merry Bah and a Happy Humbug to All in the Bar.

Steve. Who would like to take this opportunity to give the usual too short
notice of a *party*.

In The Deep Midwinter III: An Anti-SAD Bash.

Come along and cure your midwinter Seasonal Affective Disorder in a congenial
(?) environment. Saturday 16th January, 1993. 16 Aviary Place, Leeds, UK.
 
If interested/available, please mail me. I've never had a realspace of my
very own (sob!) although I've had the odd fragment of a virtual one...

Hey! Am I the first poster on Xmas day? Sad, isn't it...
From: rowanf@crc.ricoh.com (Rowan Fairgrove)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Definition of "monogamy"?
Date: 28 Dec 92 21:00:02 GMT
Reply-To: rowanf@crc.ricoh.com (Rowan Fairgrove)
Organization: RICOH California Research Center

Aahz writes:

 > BTW, based on some responses I'm seeing, just wanted to ask that people
>discuss the *definition* of "monogamy", rather than whether or not they
>themselves are monogamous.  Kitten and Mike have done a good job so far.
--

Granted you didn't ask if people were monogamous or not, but the
definitions we have heard have seemed to me to be informed by the
fact that most of the people offering them consider themselves to
be so.

I offered mine in e-mail, but since the topic has caught on, let me
share it with the folx here.

Monogamy is a promise of sexual/emotional (whatever those involved
define as important) fidelity between people in a relationship.  The
relationship may have as many people in it as have been agreed upon
by the participants to be a primary relationship.  

Some people feel that more than two people cannot have a primary
relationship and we have seen that view reflected here.  eg. 
kitten sez  ..... two candles that fuse into one light ....conversely, 
a non-monogamous person lights many flames but ultimately stands 
alone.  Mary Merrytail sez ...I can't care the same way about two people.
*/ sez .... I've always thought that a monogamous
relationship was a longish-term relationship between two people
who were not currently involved with anyone else.  

Polyamorous doesn't necessarily mean promiscuous.  It means
loving more than one person at a time.  That is certainly possible
in the context of a committed relationship.

Gypsy realizes she is beginning to get heated and the telltail
soapboxes are beginning to appear.

Oh, bloody heck.  Sorry to get overwrought, but I see people
denying the possibility of polyamory so very often and I wish
we could recognize that not everyone loves the same way just
as not everyone lives the same way.  (I appreciated Mary's
words to this effect as well.)

Gypsy slithers down off the soapboxes and proceeds to the
chalkline.

<To the many paths that bring people to happiness>

***CRASH*****

Gypsy 

Rowan Fairgrove

*****************************************
Current Book:  The Silent Stars Go By (James White)
Current Music:  Waterbearer (Sally Oldfield)
Current Movie:  The Crying Game
Current Holiday:  Hogmanay
Current Drink:  Cocoa with Tuaca & Cognac
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: wonderful life
From: olson@husc8.harvard.edu (Chip Olson@somewhere.out.there)
Date: 27 Dec 92 00:47:50
Organization: Spam-On-A-Rope Inc.
In-reply-to: trumpins@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu's message of 26 Dec 92 17:46:52 GMT

In article <Bzvo25.CLC@news.cso.uiuc.edu> trumpins@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu (Barbara Trumpinski) writes:

>castellan says:
>>"Kitten, even just knowing you electronically, I know that the world would
>>be a bleaker place without you, and you would be sorely missed.  Don't ever
>>forget that."
>
>
>kitten, all warm and purry from merlinvin's hug comes over to
>castellan and hugs him...."thank you."

Castellan returns the hug.  "you're welcome..."
--
-Chip Olson. | olson@husc.harvard.edu | ceo@{gnu.ai,silver.lcs}.mit.edu 
"If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down?
Maybe we would if they screamed all the time for no good reason." -SNL
From: ekho@cybernet.cse.fau.edu (amanda rothman)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Danger Room
Date: 25 Dec 92 04:17:29 GMT
Organization: Cybernet BBS, Boca Raton, Florida


  Chuckling softly at all the interest in the Danger Room (her own 
included), Ekho comments, "This could very well turn out to be 
entertaining.  I take it that the factors could be adjusted to compensate 
for a group of people at once?  This could be like one of your "sports", 
perhaps a team competition... Not only would it be a physical workout, 
but a lesson in strategy and tactics, as well as leadership and teamwork. 
Anyone interested to take this on?  I would be willing to participate."  
Ekho looks around the room, "The "defeated" team could buy the victors a 
round of drinks, if a prize is desired for incentive... A friendly game." 

  A smile which holds no small amount of amused irony appears on Ekho's 
face.  Amanda clears her throat and says, "I'd prefer to be on your team, 
but it would be very interesting if we were on opposite teams!  Not safe, 
but interesting.  I'm in, anyone else?"  Her voice getting suddenly 
worried, she asks, "Or is it going to be me against Ekho?"  To which Ekho 
laughs, "Do not be concerned.  I will not trounce you immediately... that 
would be no fun."  The laugh develops an evil tinge...

           Yours in Time and Space
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: cliveg@cix.compulink.co.uk (Clive Grace)
Subject: No subject 
Reply-To: cliveg@cix.compulink.co.uk
Date: Sat, 2 Jan 1993 14:33:00 +0000

Tanais makes his very first Pizza
TITLE: Tanais makes his very first pizza

Last night I made Pizza for Mary and myself -- it was pretty neat -- 
A 15" tomato and mushroom with Onions and Garlic flavoured Pizza with 
a wee bit of Pesto smeared onto the base prior to adding the toppings 
-- and of course it had lots of crushed black pepper under a lid of 
melted cheddar. No fancy cheeses, no strange combinations. It was 
very nice and Tanais' tummy is a little more swollen this morning 
than usual -- time to work it off today.

This was my first ever Pizza I made from scratch without assistance 
from Mary -- I did it all in 20 minutes (thanks to our wonderful 
Magimix with the dough hook attachment/slicer/grater/sheep worrier), 
and then  a further 20 minutes to cook. Listening to Ignatz's Thomas 
Dolby tape, I had a glass of wine and thought about Kitten's posting 
about 1993 and realised that all that talk of Pizza in The Place made 
me *want* Pizza in RL and I wanted to do it all by myself and then 
say to Mary -- "I've made some Pizza wanna help me eat it?". 

I like cooking and especially cooking Vegetarian foods (Mary likes 
meat, I'm not so sure, but I collapse whenever I have a totally 
veggie diet regime so I have to eat a little meat) -- something to do 
with the fact that I only have a 4 hour digestive cycle and a 
metabolism that burns off food so fast that it's turned into heat... 
like I said. I'm a warm person... the living hot water bottle.

For the record -- Foxes like pizza -- Tanais in particular LOVEs 
Pizza. He has yet to make a pizza that can "stew" in the fridge 
overnight as he scoffs the lot before any of it has a chance to 
snuggle under saran wrap (cling film). I may make a few to freeze and 
bring to cons/realspaces/eat when I've had a long day out of the 
house  or indeed to serve when we have our own realspace here in Bath 
sometime.

Hugs to Kitten and the Brumby in no particular order.
--
+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+
| When I grow up, I want to give up being   |cliveg@cix.compulink.co.uk|
| a Journalist and learn how to write...    |                          |
+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+
|       Bisexual knitter of quality and distinction since 1992.        |
+----------------------------------------------------------------------+
From: mdm@sparc2.prime.com (Michael D. McAfee)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Hi Alfvaen
Date: 30 Dec 92 17:02:56 GMT
Organization: Computervision


	and just to add to the silliness:

	Current Fish:  trout
	Current Magnification: 60x
	Current Current: 50 amps
	Current Courant: strawberry
	Current Lightbulb: flourescent
	Current Pen: Bic ballpoint
	Current Muppet: the Sewdish chef
	Current Tarot Card: the Hanged Man, reversed
	Current Carrot: orange 
	Cuurent Cloak: dark blue wool
	Current Shoes: black sneakers
	Current Word my Extension Spells Out: damn
	Current Alternative Word my Extension Spells Out: fan6
	Current Bone: femur
	and finally (whew!)
	Current Adjective: EmmaThompsonesque

	Hope you enjoy :)

	Michael, the Chaotic
	disclaimer:  Ha!  Your puny weapons are no match for my
			disclaimers!
From: maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk (Mary Branscombe)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Foggy Days
Date: 30 Dec 92 15:16:00 GMT
Reply-To: maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk


Gyspsy brings us the mysterious poetry of fog.. 
I often feel, in fog, that we are cocooned here. Bath is seven hills 
around a valley - I live and work down in the valley, Ignatz up on 
two of the hills. Travelling from one to the other, the sweep of the 
city is spread out, the hills, the lights, the beautiful buildings. 
From the valley, I look up at the hills - at the Sham Castle folly 
that's just the *front of a castle, at the bright lights of the 
university like a Christmas decoratoin all year round, at the 
road-lights strung out aong the curves and swoops of the roads.
When the fog falls, as it has often this month, you can barely see 
the hills at all, let alone the high tower I often gaze at from the 
bathroom window. Instead, everything is carefull wrapped in layers of 
mystery - as if the world ends at the next corner and only stretches 
as far as what I can see and remember. Walking home in fog at night, 
other people's fragile bubbles of existence loom up, merge with mine 
and pass on into the dark on their journeys.If I could stretch my 
hand out far enough, I could touch the end of the world and the magic 
beyond it

Mary MerryTail
+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+
| Ommmmmm, said the lift                    |maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk |
| Organisation: Me? You're joking, right?   |maryb@cix.compulink.uucp  |
|I know I type "teh" for "the" My fingers have their own accent ;-)    |
+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+
From: JBrandt@AAA.UOregon.EDU (Jason & Thyra)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: DIDI
Followup-To: alt.callahans
Date: 4 Jan 1993 02:27:00 GMT
Organization: the Polyhedron Group
Distribution: world
NNTP-Posting-Host: aaa.uoregon.edu

In article <C08KE4.Hrz@news.cso.uiuc.edu>, trumpins@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu
(Barbara Trumpinski) wrote:
> 
> kitten has a message...
> 
> mellie sent a note and said didi is in ICU in a paris hospital ... she
> had some sort of seizure...heart, they think.
> 
> pass the word...and PRAY....

Thyra : "Yeep!"
Jason : "Ohhhh Shi .. .."

Both : "OF COURSE! Our prayers are most CERTAINLY with her!"

Both run home to call the quarters and start another healing ritual.

J&T
.
From: maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk (Mary Branscombe)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: The world, and what it'd be like...
Date: 30 Dec 92 15:16:00 GMT
Reply-To: maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk


> TITLE: Re: The world, and what it'd be like...

> >Darkshot feels we "don't get out enough..."

> kitten gives mary a hug and a drink..."yes...i agree.  this is where i
> meet part of my chosen family...this is where i play.  my shrink told
> me i might be spending too much time on the net...because i can't go
> out for a real beer with didi....she is in paris.  so what?  real beer
> is fattening and i talk to LOTS of people in real life...and have some
> friends... but now that i am on the net, i won't give it up..."
We reach out and touch here - we think about ourselves and others - 
we communicate. That's too important and reare to give up. I wouldn't 
be afraid to have anyone here meet me and talk to me in RL, I'm not 
afraid of anyone here laughing at me or not liking me for the 
differences between teh way I talk and teh way I look - I *know I 
don't have atail here, but's fun and freeing to have one in teh 
Place. Too much of any one thing may not be good, but I doubt if 
any/many people here are using the Place as a crutch after they need 
to. Shared pain is lessened, shared joy increased and how can teh 
manner of sharing dimish the truth and beauty of that.

Mary and her whole MerryTail give kitten a hug back, then she wanders 
over to the line

"To friendship and love - that's what we have here - and the 
liberation of imagination!"
<<<<Crashhh>>>


+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+
| Ommmmmm, said the lift                    |maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk |
| Organisation: Me? You're joking, right?   |maryb@cix.compulink.uucp  |
|I know I type "teh" for "the" My fingers have their own accent ;-)    |
+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: steve@crc.ricoh.COM (Stephen R. Savitzky)
Subject: Re: An MIA returns! (-:
Organization: RICOH California Research Center
Date: 30 Dec 92 12:43:01

"Welcome back!" says the Mandelbear.  He is carrying a small bundle,
too.  "Have you met Emerald?  Hard to believe she's 9 months old
already.  How is Tux with babies?  Emmy, NO!  Let go of Daddy's beard,
please..."
--
\ --Steve Savitzky--  \    343 Leigh Ave   \ REAL HACKERS USE AN AXE!
 \ steve@crc.ricoh.COM \ San Jose, CA 95128 \     Free Cyberia!
  \ w: 415-496-5710     \   h:408-294-6492   \ 
   \_________________________________________________________________________
From: noj@matt.ksu.ksu.edu (Jonathan E Miles)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Danger Room
Date: 30 Dec 1992 03:37:10 -0600
Organization: Kansas State University
NNTP-Posting-Host: matt.ksu.ksu.edu

ekho@cybernet.cse.fau.edu (amanda rothman) writes:

>  With a raised eyebrow, Ekho nods and says, "All knowledge is useful.  
>That's three; anyone else?"

>  Amanda grins and says, "Since Ekho and I are going to be on opposite 
>teams, does that mean you're on my side, Itosu?  I think that Ekho 
>wouldn't mind..."

>  "Indeed.  A large challenge," Ekho deduces.

"I would be honored, Ekho will be an...interesting opponent."

Itogu grins a gap-toothed grin.

"I might as well, besides, your size will help, being much different from mine.
We will make a good team."


Itosu the ogre


Jon Miles

--
I got your .sig RIGHT DOWN HERE!!!!


Newsgroups: alt.callahans