HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: cindy@berkp.uadv.uci.edu (Cindy Windham)
Subject: Request: activities for mountain vacation
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Organization: University Advancement, University of Calif., Irvine
Distribution: usa
Date: 20 Nov 92 19:58:28 GMT

I'm a little bit embarrassed to ask for this, but here goes.  My family
is taking a vacation to the local mountains (Big Bear in CA) after
Thanksgiving.  It probably won't be snowing.  My children are 3 1/2yo
and 1 1/2 yo, both boys.  We're staying there for a week, and will
probably go skiing 2 days, putting the kids in the ski school/daycare
on those days.  I planned to visit "Santa's Village" which is close by
on another day.  That leaves me with 3 free days.  I'd appreciate any
suggestions of things to do on those days which would involve/interest
my children.  Never having spent much time in the mountains, I'm rather
at a loss.  Certainly there must be things to do and explore in the
mountains that city-kids miss out on.  I just don't know what they are,
being a city-kid myself :-).  Also, there will be time when we're just
in the condo, relaxing.  Can anyone suggest games or toys to take on
vacation?  

Thanks in advance!

- Cindy Windham
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: psybc806@emory.edu (Elise G. Jacobs)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: episiotomies.....your doctor is lazy
Date: 16 Nov 92 15:32:53 GMT
Organization: Emory University, Atlanta, GA
X-Newsreader: Tin 1.1 PL3

[ Article crossposted from general ]
[ Author was Elise G. Jacobs ]
[ Posted on 12 Nov 92 14:51:55 GMT ]

Newsgroups: misc.kids
Distribution: 
Summary: 
Keywords: 
  

First of all, let me first say that there are real reasons to have 
episiotomies and that if other methods fail, they probably should be done.

BUT....

Any doctor that does them without exhausting his other options is lazy and
irresponsible.  In a way, it is like just yanking out a sore tooth instead
of healing it.  Certainly, a woman's body is generally capable of stretching
enough to allow a baby to be born (for MOST women).  History, I believe, bears
this fact out.  For a small percentage of women, perhaps not, but they are
the minority.

Doctors should use massage and heat compresses during the pushing (what else
is he there for anyway...?) and make sure that you don't push the baby out too
quickly.  There is a reason that the pushing part of labor usually takes place
in a "two steps forward, one step back" kind of fashion.  As the baby moves
toward the opening, it stretches the skin, but then moves back a bit between
contractions.  This slow progress usually allows for less tearing.  

You can also help things by doing squats daily and getting that area all `
limbered up....

If you do end up tearing, it isn't much generally, and you will be sewed up,
just as if you had an episiotomy, but you won't rip as much as the epis. would
have been.  Stories of haywire tearing are RARE and are used as scare tactics
against women who dare to coop the doctor's ultimate power. 

Just so you know where I am coming from, I am pregnant and go to a doctor
who does not do regular episiotomies.  He works very hard to prevent 
tearing.  Of three of my friends who gave birth through him in the past two
months, one tore, two didn't.  The one that tore (she tore in her first birth,
also),  still wouldn't want an episiotomy for any further labors.  

when I did an internship three years ago observing births with midwives and
doctors, all the midwifery births did not receive episiotomies, and some of
them tore slightly (nothing to write home about).  

I guess it comes down to believing that your body is pretty much capable of
doing what it has to do without someone cutting you up.  Certainly, there 
are exceptions, but why start out assuming you are one of them.  Do
your squats, do massage if you are up to it, and make sure your file says
"NO EPISIOTOMY unless I start to tear" and make sure all the doctors know
that that is in the file and that you are dead serious that you expect them
to adhere to your medical wishes.

good luck, 
Elise
From: smb@ulysses.att.com (Steven Bellovin)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: cute things they say (age 6)
Date: 18 Nov 92 05:33:15 GMT
Organization: AT&T Bell Laboratories

Last night, I happened to tell Rebecca one of the cute things she'd
said when she was 2.5.  She didn't believe me, I persisted, so
she announced, ``Daddy, you're weird!''.

We finally persuaded her that the incident really happened...
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: amym@oakhill.sps.mot.com (Amy Moseley Rupp)
Subject: Inadequate Weight Gain at Two Week Checkup
Organization: Motorola Inc., Austin Tx.
Date: Thu, 19 Nov 1992 22:15:48 GMT

Elizabeth just had her two week checkup; she weighed 7 lbs 8 oz, down
from birthweight of 7 lbs 12 oz.  The doctor said we were not feeding
her enough, although I have been faithful about giving her her bottles.
I was also breastfeeding a little and the doctor said to commit to
either serious breastfeeding or total bottle feeding, but not largely
bottle feeding and a little breastfeeding.  I'd been ambivalent on
the breastfeeding, but really want to commit to it now.

I've been breastfeeding her all day today it seems like; I know I
still have milk although I'm sure the supply is not the greatest
although I hope to build it with a breast pump and a ferocious little     
Elizabeth.  After about two hours of nursing, she still seemed hungry
so I gave her a bottle of formula; she wolfed down 2 oz and despite
burping her constantly, spit back up quite a lot.  I then gave her
another 1.5 oz or so, and she went to sleep.  

I worry about her weight although the doctor said everything else was OK,
she gave me no indication on how serious the weight problem was.  I had
been hoping to take Elizabeth on a six hour drive to see my grandparents
for Thanksgiving, but the doctor said we needed to concentrate on her
weight gain instead.  Too bad she can't have turkey & dressing!  ;-)

BTW how old were your infants before they went on long car trips?  What's
the recommended age for first plane trips? 

A very tired not-so-super-mom-cow
-- 
Amy Moseley Rupp			Needed:  one witty, appropriate,
amym@oakhill.sps.mot.com		businesslike .sig that will perfectly
(512) 329-7117				reflect my philosophy of life and will
3 weeks and counting			fit in four lines or less.
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: cathy@octel.com (Cathy Kearns)
Subject: Re: Advice Wanted: Is Six Years Old too Young for a Sleep-over?
Keywords: pajama party, sleep-over
Organization: Octel Communications Inc., Milpitas Ca.
Distribution: usa
Date: Mon, 16 Nov 1992 17:40:59 GMT

In article <1992Nov12.184359.2976@cbfsb.cb.att.com> eacln@cbnewsg.cb.att.com (carol.l.nolan) writes:
>
>My daughter, who turned 6 about a month ago, has just been invited to
>a sleep-over birthday party for one of her 1st grade classmates.
>Although I have met both the classmate and her mother on a school field
>trip, we don't know them well, although they seem like perfectly nice
>people.
>
>Katie often spends the night at her grandparents' house, and has spent
>the night at her best friends house (3 doors away).  But my gut reaction 
>is that six years old is too young for a sleep-over party. This is, oddly
>enough, the second sleep-over she has been invited to in the last month, but
>we already had plans which (luckily!) conflicted with the first invitation.

My niece had a sleep over party for her 6th birthday and here's how it went.
She was allowed to invite 3 friends.  She chose two other 6 year olds from
school and her almost 3 year old cousin (my daughter, Alison).  Now, Alison
was no problem at all, as she had slept over before.  Of the two other girls,
both did fine up until one of their mother's called at 10pm to see how her
little girl was doing.  My sister said she was in her pjs and having a great
time, but after the little girl talked to her mother she decided she did want
to go home.  (My daughter told that part of the story quite gleefully, it seems
that particular little girl, though nice to her, did refer to her as "the baby"
and my daughter didn't appreciate it.)  Anyway, the three remaining girls
eventually did go to sleep, and woke up quite happy, and Alison still 
remembers her first sleep over party quite fondly.

The moral is, if you are really worried, you could let her go, and then call
and see how she's doing.  I wouldn't suggest going as far as that mother did,
and talking the little girl into going home, as I don't know if the children
teased her about it later.  But if she wasn't having a good time, I'm sure
the birthday girl's parents would be sure to tell you, as I'm sure they 
wouldn't want an unhappy girl there all night.

							Cathy
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: RMNL69@paccvm.corp.mot.com (Les Aquino)
Subject: Re: bilingual kids
Organization: Motorola
Date: 19 Nov 1992 10:30:52 HKT

I, too, am interested on how a child can become bilingual.  I'd like my
baby daughter (currently 4 days old) to learn and speak my dialect.  There
have been notions that a growing child will learn a language/dialect faster
if it is spoken in the child's environment.  So I figured, maybe, I could
teach my wife my dialect.  That way, we could converse in my dialect and
the baby will grow up hearing us converse.  Sounds simple ?  Boy, is it
difficult !  My wife and I have been having daily 30 minutes sessions with
me giving her drills on my dialect's grammar etc.  So far, I've not seen
real good progress.  I would really appreciate if someone can share
techniques on how a child can learn a second language.
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: tbachman@hamline.edu. (Toni Bachmann 6412947)
Subject: Hicum Up Pickum Ups
Organization: Hamline University, St. Paul, Minnesota. [The Little U]
Date: Wed, 18 Nov 1992 15:05:52 GMT

Hi:

My six year old son got the hic-ups last night which is not unusual, but it
was the first time he ever said anything in his ife about them:

"Mom, why do you get hicum up pickum ups?"

(I thought it was funny).

Toni
From: djones@iex.iex.com
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: Hole in the eardrum
Date: 24 Nov 92 00:12:28 GMT
Organization: IEX Corporation Inc.

In article <3927@master.CNA.TEK.COM> judyd@rosebud.CNA.TEK.COM writes:
>
>My son (3 1/2 years old) had a checkup recently, and the pediatrician
>discovered that he has a hole in one of his eardrums.  He says it
>was probably left from when Jordan's tubes fell out.  Jordan got
>tubes put in when he was six months old.  I don't know when they fell
>out, but they told me at the time the tubes would stay in 6 to 12 
>months.  At his 2-year checkup, the dr. said they were still in there
>but they looked like they were ready to fall out.  So the tubes
>have probably been gone for at least a year, and Jordan still has a
>hole in his eardrum.  We're supposed to go back in February to check
>to see if the hole has healed over, and if it hasn't, Jordan has to
>get a patch on his eardrum.
>
>So, has anyone else had this happen?  What does patching the eardrum
>entail?  Does it require anesthesia, and if so, can it be done under
>a local?  Is the patch permanent?  
>
>Anyone know?
>
>
My son has had 5 sets of tubes and my daughter just got her third
(they are 4 1/2), and this has happened to us. The hole generally
closes just fine, and in a way provides many of the same benefits
of having the tube. I am not sure what is entailed in having the hole
closed, in all this time we have not had the experience. 

Doug
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                                   |    djones@iex.iex.com
                                   |    uunet!iex!djones
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From: lynne@pacersoft.com (Lynne Chantler)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: Why not 2%
Date: 19 Nov 92 21:25:28 GMT
X-UserAgent: Nuntius v1.1.1d7
X-XXDate: Thu, 19 Nov 92 21:32:44 GMT

In article <1992Nov17.174951.8247@kodak.kodak.com> Nanette Salvaggio,
salvaggi@sunshine.Kodak.COM writes:
>My son had his first year check up.  He went from sitting on the 50th
percentile
>his entire forst year to the 80th for weight.  The doctor then asked a
million
>questions about his diet.  My son loves milk and drinks about 35 oz. a
day.
>This is whole milk.  The doctoer said that was way to much and to reduce
it
>by half.  Well we do not eat a lot a meat (one every 2 weeks, chicken or 
>turkey) and we feel that milk is important to his diet.  He drinks about
>8 oz. of water a day also.  When I asked him if we could just go to 2%
he said,
>that it has more sodium and was not a good idea.  Well I examined the
labels
>and there is no difference in the sodium at all.  There is 8 grams of
fat in 
>whole and 5 grams in the 2% per cup.  We have tried reducing his milk but
>he really does prefer it and is not always that pleased with us.  Do if
I 
>reduce his milk intake or go to 2% and let him drink as he does now, he
>will still be getting enough fat.  Any opinions as to go to 2% or not?

Whole milk is only 3-4% fat. Babies need the milk fat to develop their
neurological systems.  I wouldn't worry too much about protein intact. 
Historically we've eaten way too much protein too.

I have a similar problem with Grace - she loves milk and will drink 30+
oz. a day if I let her.  I have tried to keep her milk intact down to 24
oz. a day and have supplemented with juices which she also likes.

I would try to get him into juices there are lots of them available with
no sugar added, which is all I will give to Grace.


Lynne
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: JFRAWLEY@SUVM.SYR.EDU (Judy Thomas Frawley)
Subject: Various Questions about 4YO - Thanks
Organization: Syracuse University
Date: Fri, 20 Nov 92 16:35:35 EST

I got lots of really compassionate responses to my questions about
 
1.  My mother buying a toy for my daughter for Christmas which
    I have already purchased (and which will be her major present
    from me)
and
2.  What to do about the differences between mom's house and
    dad's house when my 4YO says "but my daddy lets me do X"
 
Question #1 Responses ranged from
 
a. take toy back myself
b. ask mother to take toy back
c. talk to my father
d. grin and bear it; holidays are stressful enough
e. buy a different toy myself
 
I have decided to *attempt* a chat with my mother.  If that doesn't
work, then I will drop it.  But, I will discuss the *issue* of who
does what for my daughter at a less stressful time than Thanksgiving
and Christmas.  My mother does not mean any harm.  She loves my
daughter.  However, our relationship can be very volatile, and she
can be very controlling.  I have decided that at this stage in my
life, I just can't take the emotional toll of a battle with my
mother, so I will attempt a calm chat, and if that doesn't work,
Hannah will get two Barney's - one at moms and one at Grandmas.
 
Question #2
 
I must admit that there are an awful lot of emotions wrapped up
in that question.  My husband and I are still hammering out a
divorce settlement, and it is getting quite messy despite my
best efforts for it not to.  We have joint custody - Hannah
spends 50% of her time with both of us unless she is sick,
has a day off because Day Care is closed, or father is sick;
then she is with me.  He's now trying to get full custody of
her claiming that I am *jealous* of the time she spends with
him.  I am sure it will all work out but it is a real difficult
time for all of us. I still think that joint custody is the best
for everybody.
 
When she throws her father at me (which I *know* is not
intentional), I have to learn to back off.  If we all
lived together, there would be the same sort of behavior.
Last night, she told me that her daddy lets her stay up
late every night and watch t.v. until the news comes on.
My response:  It sounds like you and daddy have fun staying
up late.  Mommy needs more sleep than that, so we go to bed
earlier at mommy's house.  She seemed to accept this.
 
It was suggested to me that I try to celebrate the differences
and point out the commonalities.  I knew that; I was just getting
caught up in my own frustration at the situation which Hannah
does not know about (I don't discuss the divorce around her
if at all possible unless she asks me something).
 
So, thanks to everybody.  I can't wait for Thanksgiving and
a few days of sleep.
 
:-) Judy Frawley
Hannah's mama
From: bmartin@cipc1.DaytonOH.NCR.COM (Barb Martin)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: Potty Training FAQ, please?
Date: 19 Nov 92 18:26:45 GMT
Distribution: usa
Organization: NCR Corporation - Dayton, OH USA

Please send me a copy of this.  Thanks.

-- 
Barb Martin
IRM Infrastructure Operations
Barb.Martin@cipc1.DaytonOH.NCR.COM
...!uunet!ncrcom!cipc1!bmartin
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: janines@novell.com (Janine Schenone)
Subject: Single Parents (Was: Single Parents Avoiding Spanking)
Organization: Novell, Inc.
Date: Thu, 19 Nov 1992 00:14:55 GMT

I received several kind replies to my post last week about how
I handle the pressures of single parenting. First, I wanted to
thank all of you who wrote to me and let you know how much I
appreciate your replies.

And I wanted to say to the misc.kids group at large: one of the
most valuable benefits of this group is that we can tell each
other that we are *good* parents. Single parents, especially, need
to hear that, because we often don't have another adult around
to notice and appreciate how hard we work at raising our
children.

In my case, for example, whenever my daughter goes through some
phase, I ask myself, "Is this happening because her dad isn't
around, or is this a normal toddler thing?" And the reason I
ask myself these questions is that well-meaning family members
and friends often speculate about what being without a father is going
to do to my child. Well, Dad left when she was very young, and
she didn't seem to notice the difference. I have learned to shrug
off these comments, and I have been bolstered
by reading this group; I have more proof now that what my daughter
does is normal.

So keep up the booster shots for parents in general and single
parents in particular. If you have loved your child today, you are
a good parent.

Smarmily yours,
Janine
janines@novell.com
From: tigger@satyr.Sylvan.COM (Grace Sylvan)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: A Balanced Diet (Was Re: Halloween Stories)
Date: 19 Nov 92 04:03:30 GMT
	<26440@optima.cs.arizona.edu>
Organization: Sylvan Associates

In article <26440@optima.cs.arizona.edu> bweiss@cs.arizona.edu (Beth Weiss) writes:

   (someone writes)

   >   How do you handle preventing waste (the throwing out of
   >   good food/drink that could have been easily used with better planning)?

   What's the difference between eating something you don't want, and
   throwing it out?  I often have to tell myself that food is just as
   wasted if I eat it when I didn't want it as it is if I throw it
   out--and throwing it out is better for my figure and my digestion.

   I realize that the issue is slightly different with a child who has a
   habit of doing this (especially when you're paying for it), but I
   would think you'd want to avoid the pitfall of having her think she
   has to eat everything on her plate, even if it makes her sick.  (Of
   course, that might be the way to get her to take smaller portions)

And how about putting leftovers away, on the plate, even, and letting
the child eat the leftovers later? I *do* throw away some leftovers -
but there's no law saying that things can't be re-served to the child.
Get soda in bottles instead of cans, put leftovers away - they can
then choose (if you have a microwave) between cold leftovers and
warmed up leftovers for their snack or next meal. And serve snacks
that take little preparation to begin with.
-- 

Tigger (Grace Sylvan)                Mom of Katherine Yelena, 8/8/89,
tigger@satyr.sylvan.com              Corey 1/31/91; we loved him so,
                                     Robin Gregory born 2/28/92

 "It seems to me that our large goal is to find the ways to help our
 children become humane and strong."
 
              - Dr Haim Ginott quoted by Adele Faber & Elaine Mazlish
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Newsgroups: misc.kids

To digress a bit, what do you do when your HUSBAND likes Metallica?
Actually, it's only a problem when he goes to concerts and everyone
thinks he's a narc.  He's only 32 but pretty bald and he has a "mature"
face.  He can strike up a conversation about music with any teenage boy.

My tastes run towards Neil Diamond.  My anniversary present this year was
tickets to the Neil Diamond concert (poor boy had to stand in line with
premenopausal woman wearing fanny packs and Birkenstocks...) and his 
present was that he DIDN'T HAVE TO GO WITH ME.  

Jean Jasinski
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: owens@gargoyle.uchicago.edu (Christopher Owens)
Subject: Re: Rules? (Re: Diapers and the environment)
Organization: University of Chicago Computing Organizations
Date: Tue, 17 Nov 1992 00:30:24 GMT

In <168A1F555.BIOSEE@UKCC.UKY.EDU> BIOSEE@UKCC.UKY.EDU (Stephanie Edelmann) writes:


> I personally think that a discussion looses out when people start
> getting into personal attacks.
> This is just MHO, but I'd hope that I'm not alone.

You aren't.  I started this current round of the whole diaper
discussion, and, until today, had been impressed by the civility with
which people were disagreeing, and by the degree to which they were
using facts and logical argument to bolster their positions.  I've
learned some new things from the people who took exception to my
postings. Let's keep it up.
From: magdi@uxh.cso.uiuc.edu (Magdi N Azer)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Screaming 18 MO
Date: 17 Nov 92 15:49:31 GMT
Article-I.D.: news.BxvAML.2F7
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana


	We would appreciate some helpful hints regarding curbing screaming in
our 18 MO son.  Recently, when he doesn't get his way, he will scream for a few
seconds.  Part of the problem is that he is somewhat delayed in his speech 
(he is only saying a few words).  Part of this is attributed to incessant ear
infections prior to getting tubes in May.  We hav an audiologist appt in Dec.,
but returning to the orignal issue, what are some ways that you have handled
similar situations.

	At the present time, he are using a time out chair.  We started this at
15 MO and it was very effective in correcting him when he found it fun to hit.

	Also, where can I get the FAQ list regarding discipline.

	Thanks in advance

	Magdi N. Azer
	magdi@uxh.cso.uiuc.edu
Newsgroups: misc.kids