From: sira@west.darkside.com (Sira Vista)
Newsgroups: alt.tv.red-dwarf
Subject: Red Dwarf Episode Guide
Date: 26 Jan 93 08:12:29 GMT
Reply-To: nems@west.darkside.com
Organization: The Dark Side of the Moon +1 408 245 SPAM



/-----------------------------\
!  RED DWARF: THE COMPENDIUM  !
\-----------------------------/
   (by Mark Nems
    nems@west.darkside.com)


Cast:
  Arnold Rimmer.............Chris Barrie
  David Lister..............Craig Charles
  Cat.......................Danny John-Jules
  Holly (seasons 1 & 2).....Norman Lovett
  Holly (season 3)..........Hattie Hayridge
  Christine Kochanski.......C. P. Grogan
  Kryten....................Robert Llewellyn
Written by Rob Grant & Doug Naylor
Directed by Ed Bye
Music by Howard Goodall 


>>>>SEASON ONE<<<<

THE END
   The ship's captain finds out that Lister has a pet cat, and asks for
   the pet be handed over. Lister refuses and is placed in suspended 
   animation. When Lister is revived, he finds that three million years
   have passed and his only companions are a hologram of his roommate
   Rimmer, and a life form that has evolved from his cat.

FUTURE ECHOES
   As the ship breaks light speed, the crew come into contact with pieces
   of their future. Including a photo of Lister with two baby boys.

BALANCE OF POWER
   Lister begins studying for the chief's exam, in an attempt to become an
   officer that would out-rank Rimmer

WAITING FOR GOD
   Lister discovers that he and his original cat, Frankenstein, are the
   basis for Cat's religion.

CONFIDENCE & PARANOIA
   After Lister is exposed to radiation, his confidence and paranoia
   materialize as humanoid forms.
   
ME^2 (Me Squared)
   After a second hologram is made of Rimmer, both Rimmers move out to 
   their own quarters. However, Rimmer soon finds out that he gets along
   better with Lister, than with himself.


>>>>SEASON TWO<<<<

KRYTEN
   The Red Dwarf responds to a distress call from three shipwrecked women. 
   Upon investigation, it turns out that the only survivor is their
   mechaniod servant named Kryten.

BETTER THAN LIFE
   A postal pod filled with mail is intercepted. In the mail is news of 
   Rimmer's fathers death, and a total emersion video game.

THANKS FOR THE MEMORY
   Lister and Cat, each awake with a cast upon their leg, and no one has
   any memory of the last four days.

STASIS LEAK
   A stasis leak allows Lister and Rimmer to go back in time where Rimmer
   tries to prevent his death, and Lister tries to marry Kochanski.

QUEEG
   When Holly malfunctions, Queeg takes over as the ship's new disciplined
   computer.

PARALLEL UNIVERSE
   Using the Holly Hop allows the crew to come into contact with parallel
   universe versions of themselves. Lister goes to bed with his female 
   counterpart, and then discovers that he is pregnant.


>>>>SEASON THREE<<<<
                              Red Dwarf  III
                                 THE SAGA
                                CONTINUUMS

The story so far...

Three million years in the future, David Lister, the last human alive,
discovers he is pregnant after a liaison with his female self in a
parallel universe.  His pregnancy concludes with the successful birth of
twin boys, Jim and Baxley.  However, because the two were conceived in
another universe, with different physical laws, they suffer from highly
accelerated growth rates, and are both eighteen years old within 3 days of
being born.  In order to save their lives, Lister returns them to the
universe of their origin, where they are reunited with their father (a
woman), and are able to lead comparatively normal lives.  Well, as normal
as you can be if you've been born in a parallel universe and your father's
a woman and your mother's a man and you're eighteen years old three days
after your birth.  Shortly afterwards, Kryten, the service mechanoid who
left the ship after being rescued from his own crashed vessel, The Nova 5,
is found in pieces after his space bike crash lands into an astroid.
Lister rebuilds the 'noid, but is unable to recapture his former
personality. Meanwhile, Holly, the increasingly erratic Red Dwarf computer
performs a head sex change operation on himself.  He bases his new face on
Hilly, a female computer with whom he'd once fallen madly in love.

                       And now the saga continuums...
                               
                              Red Dwarf III
                            The Same Generation
                                = nearly =

BACKWARDS
   Kryten and Rimmer pass through a time hole, and are shocked to find
   that time is running backwards on earth.

MAROONED
   Forced to abandon the Red Dwarf as it hurtles toward a maze of black 
   holes, Lister and Rimmer are stranded on a cold, lifeless moon.

POLYMORPH
   A slavering mutant with the ability to change shape, runs amok on the
   Red Dwarf.

BODYSWAP
   Rimmer has an idea for Lister to improve his physical fitness; switch
   bodies with him.

TIMESLIDES
   Kryten finds a film developer that makes photos people can walk into, 
   and change their past. 

THE LAST DAY
   Kryten discovers that his expiration date is less than a day away, and
   the crew are determined to give him an unforgettable send off.


******FOURTH SEASON UNDER CONSTRUCTION.
   THE FOURTH SEASON JUST MADE ITS WAY OVER TO THE WEST COAST OF THE U.S.
   AND IT'LL BE ADDED SOON.
   THE FIFTH HAS NOT MADE IT HERE YET!


>>>>LYRICS<<<<


        ** RED DWARF THEME **
    It's cold outside,
    There's no kind of atmosphere
    I'm all alone, more or less
    Let me fly, far away from here
    Fun, fun, fun, in the sun, sun, sun

    I want to lie, shipwrecked and comatose,
    Drinking fresh mango juice
    Goldfish shoals nibbling at my toes
    Fun, fun, fun, in the sun, sun, sun

    Fun, fun, fun, in the sun, sun, sun...

   

            TONGUE-TIED 
    When I saw you for the first time (first time)
    My knees began to quiver (quiver)
    And I got a funny feeling (feeling)
    In my kidneys and my liver (digestive system baby)
 
    My hands they started shakin' (shakin')
    My heart began a-thumpin' (boom boom boom)
    My breakfast left my body (huey huey huey)
    All this tells me something
 
    Girl you make me tongue-tied (tongue-tied), tongue-tied
    Whenever you are near me (near me)
    Tied tongue (tied tongue), tied tongue (tied tongue)
    Whenever you're in town (boom boom boom)
 
    I saw you cross the dance floor (dancing)
    I thought of birds and bees (reproductive system baby)
    But when I tried to speak to you (talk tall)
    My tongue unraveled to my knees (flippity-flippity-flop)
 
    I tried to say, "I love you" (love you)
    But it came out kind of wrong girl (wrong girl)
    It sounded like mi-noo-muh-dee-do (tongue-tied)
    Mil-uh-nuh-muh-nee-nung nirl
 
    Because you make me tongue-tied (tongue-tied), tongue-tied
    Whenever you are near me (near me)
    Be-dog-be-durble (dog-be-durble)
    Tongue-tied (tongue-tied)
    Whenever you're around (ba-boom boom boom)
 
    Oh, I'm begging on my knees
    Sweet, sweet darling listen please
    Understand me when I say...
    Ge-durble-diggle-doggle-miggle-fah-len-all-the-way
 
    I'm trying to say I'm nongy-nengy (nangy-nong) ningy-nongy
    Why can't I tell you clearly (clearly)
    Be-dobby-durgle (dobby-durgle), durlge-dobby (durgle-dobby)
    Whenever you're around (around)
    Whenever you're around
         *from 'Parallel Universe'*


>>>>BOOKS<<<<

   "Red Dwarf - Infinity Welcomes Careful Drivers"
   "Better Than Life"                  
         *both by "Grant Naylor"* 

Mail nems@west.darkside.com if you have any coments or questions.