From: panlilio@acs.ucalgary.ca (Victor P. Panlilio)
Subject: Re: A wittle survey...jus' a wittle wone...
Summary: How Not to Make Lying A Way of Life
Date: Sun, 16 Aug 92 16:34:03 GMT
Distribution: soc.penpals
Organization: The University of Calgary, Alberta
Keywords: Honesty, Lying

In article <56964@mentor.cc.purdue.edu> look@mentor.cc.purdue.edu (ken loo) writes:

VP>>gals find me cute (and I do mean cute, 'cause I'm only 5'6")
VP>>Ken - how's that for honesty? Don't be SOOOO cynical - some
VP>>people actually tell the truth because it's a way of life!

KL>are you talking to me?

Yes, Ken, I'm talking to you!  :)

KL>Dont tell me that any of you netters out there have never told
KL>a lie!  If so, that in itself would be a lie.  One can lie and
KL>not know it.  One can spontaniously lie and know it, but can not
KL>control it.  There are many reasons which might make a person
KL>lie, not just because they are dishonest.  Honest people 
KL>tell lies too.  

Reminds me of the old joke about "You can't believe him, even
when he tells you that he's lying!" (insert laugh track here)

Sure, honest people lie too, for various reasons, some conscious,
others subconscious. But in my case lying is extremely difficult
because my ears or indeed my entire face turns beet red when I
know that I have told an untruth, so it turns out that I cannot
even spontaneously lie without giving away the fact that I am
lying, so technically it isn't lying anymore, because my body
apparently refuses to let me get away with it. The only case I
know where this does not happen is when I have told a "lie" out
of ignorance or misinformation, in which case it isn't a lie
anymore, at least in principle. Maybe some of us are genetically
predisposed to telling the truth - it may have survival value.

That is not to say that I am not tempted to lie - I am.  But,
knowing myself as I do, I am well aware that attempting to lie is
pretty much doomed to failure, so I tend not to bother.   :)

KL>Are you refering to your mentioning of the fact that you are
KL>only 5'6" as your being honest?  There is not much to lie there,
KL>unless you feel that being shorter than average is inferior 
KL>or something to be ashame of.  If that was the case, and you     
KL>were dishonest about it, I would not cosider that as your 
KL>fault, it is the society's fault.  Being ashame of something
KL>is one good reason which could make an honest person lie.

Well, I know that people can misrepresent themselves very easily
over a network since there are so few clues to go on. Some of my
E-mailpals have received harassing letters from netjerks who
seemed nice at first, but who on closer inspection (even over the
net) turned out to be something other than what they pretended to
be. Me, I've never misrepresented myself on the net (or anywhere
else for that matter). When I walk up to a beautiful woman that
I want to photograph (because I am an aspiring beauty and fashion
photographer in my spare time), I don't tell her that I am some
rising young hotshot like Walter Chin who will make her famous, I
just say that I'm a local boy who is trying to teach himself the
trade. I let my portfolio speak for me - and it IS my own work, I
don't even copy ideas from magazines or books, although I might
use what I see as an inspiration, a starting point for my work.

I am not ashamed of being 5'6", but I am frustrated that it makes
it difficult to start a relationship with women who are unwilling
to consider dating someone who is much shorter than they are. And
since I am around models who are 5'9" OR TALLER, you can probably
understand that this gets pretty old after a while. Especially
since I tend to get to know the models in the process of taking
their pictures - to be a good people photographer you have to be
good at intuiting what makes people tick, and some of the models
I've met are really nice people that I wouldn't mind dating, and
of course because of the social norms, this is wishful thinking.

Unless of course, some of you taller women out there have a thing
for cuddly, sweet-natured shorter men - I'm sure you exist.  :)

After all, at least some of my E-mailpals have boyfriends who are
shorter than they are - and are loving every minute of it.  ;)

Speak up, all ye taller women who like shorter men! :) :) :) :)

KL>Some gals find me cute too; I am even shorter than you are.
KL>Asians are not know to be tall.  

Really? How come every posting I've seen so far in alt.personals
that is placed by an Asian quotes a height of no less than 5'9"
and in some cases goes to 6' and one guy even said that he grew
up in the U.S. so that he had no "Asian" accent? Strange.....

It must be my diet....yeah, that must be it.....  *snicker*
Too much rice and soya sauce.......

>I am not cynical, I just see things the way they are.
>Ken

How you see things is not necessarily the way things are, IMHO.
Only omniscient people (do you know any?) can claim to see things
as they are, and we're assuming of course that omniscience is
even theoretically possible. And no, I am NOT a freaking radical
subjectivist, either.  :)

Your statement reminds me of Oscar Wilde, who once said that
"The power of accurate observation is called cynicism by those
who do not possess it."  :)

I prefer Kahlil Gibran: "The world is a great mirror. It reflects
back to you what you yourself are."

And that, in a nutshell, is MY philosophy of life. Cheers.  :)
(Oh, and my undergraduate major was mechanical engineering!)

P.S. What is an optimist? An optimist is someone who, after
having jumped off the World Trade Center, thinks on the way
down, "Well, I'm not hurt yet."

If at first you don't succeed, well, so much for skydiving.  :)

Victor
Who is 5'6" but likes himself just the same