From: tlode@nyx.cs.du.edu (trygve lode)
Subject: Re: Cooking for 1!
Organization: Nyx, Public Access Unix @ U. of Denver Math/CS dept.
Date: Sun, 6 Sep 92 22:17:55 GMT

In article <thurlow.715664471@convex.convex.com> thurlow@convex.com (Robert Thurlow) writes:
>
>Graham Kerr, the Galloping Gourmet, was a howl; it was one of the
>coolest shows the CBC ever thought of putting on daytime TV, so we
>could still get it in Saskatchewan.  That sonofabitch was _funny_!
>I don't think my Mom gave a shit for his recipes when she tuned in.
>The drinking problem may have been right, but he did get straight
>and start a "Return Of ..." show a couple of years ago, I heard.

Well, I checked my archives, and, though I don't have any surviving
records of the "Galloping Gourmet," I do have an episode or two of
a very similar show on file which will hopefully make those of you
out there who are waxing nostalgic for this sort of show feel all 
warm and tingly inside.  (Side note--this particular episode was in
an issue of the Unnatural Enquirer back when Denver was being besieged
by a record-breaking number of miller moths.)

 
 
                          The Garrotting Gourmand
 
Readers have been writing in all month with their best lepidoptera recipes
and, though I don't usually print non-vegetarian recipes, I've just gotten so
many of these delightful dishes sent in that I've decided to print the best
here for you non-vegetarians to enjoy.  (Don't worry--next week we'll be back
to recipes that everyone can eat.)
 
 
                                Mothkebabs
 
one pound baby carrots                          one pound pearl onions
one pound jalapeno peppers                      three pounds miller moths
Teriaki sauce                                   seventy boxes round toothpicks
 
Chop the carrots, pearl onions, and jalapeno peppers into eighth-inch slices,
remove wings, antennae, and legs from the moths, separate head, thorax, and
abdomens, and slice abdomens into three or four pieces.  Alternate vegetable
slices with moth parts on toothpicks, placing head on the top end of the
toothpick for a festive look.  Brush with teriaki sauce and barbecue for
twenty-five to thirty seconds.  Mothkebabs may be doused in brandy and served
flaming if desired.
 
 
                              Mothloaf
 
three eggs                1 cup dried breadcrumbs         three pounds moths
 
Chop moths in a food processor or blender and combine with eggs and
breadcrumbs.  Bake at 350 for 50 minutes or until the top is brown and
crunchy-looking.  I've found that this recipe is equally good whether fed to
the cat or shipped to Uruguay.
 
 
                             Mothballs
 
1 cup sugar      1/2 cup corn syrup      1/4 cup water      five pounds moths
 
Combine sugar, water, and corn syrup in a small saucepan and cook over a
medium flame, stirring until sugar is completely dissolved and mixture comes
to a boil.  Reduce heat and continue boiling until mixture reaches hard ball
stage.  Pour over moths and stir until moths are well-coated.  Scoop out
portions of moth-candy mixture, form into balls, and allow to congeal on
sheets of waxed paper.
 
 
                           Moth Brittle
 
2 cups sugar            1/2 cup corn syrup              1/3 cup water
1/4 cup butter          1 tsp vanilla extract           three pounds moths
 
Combine sugar, corn syrup, and water in a three-quart saucepan and bring to a
boil, stirring constantly.  Cook to hard ball stage, add vanilla and butter,
and beat rapidly until mixture loses its gloss.  Pour sugar mixture over
moths, mix thoroughly, and spread onto two greased cookie sheets to cool.
For best results, do *not* make moth brittle.
 
 
                           Fillet Mothignon
 
                            One fresh moth
 
Carefully cut away the head, abdomen, legs, and wings of one fresh, plump
moth; put these aside for another recipe (cf. Moth Haggis on page 23).  Slice
thorax down the middle of the ventral side and peel away exoskeleton, being
careful not to bruise the tender inner fillet.  Bake in a covered pan at 325
for three hours, basting every twenty minutes.  Fillet should be done when
surface is golden-brown, crispy on the outside and tender inside.  Before
serving, allow to cool for a few minutes, throw away, and order pizza.
 
 
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