From: jrs@netcom.com (John Switzer)
Subject: Summary Fri 8/28/92
Date: Sun, 30 Aug 92 20:05:56 GMT
Organization: Netcom - Online Communication Services  (408 241-9760 guest) 
Summary: Unofficial Summary for Friday, August 28, 1992
Distribution: world,usa,na
Keywords: Unofficial Summary Rush Limbaugh

Unofficial Summary of the Rush Limbaugh Show

for Friday, August 28, 1992

by John Switzer

NOTE: This is being posted to both alt.fan.rush-limbaugh and
alt.rush-limbaugh and thus you may see it twice if your sysadm
aliases the two newsgroups together. Since most sites don't
support both groups, this double-posting appears to be
unavoidable, however, if anyone has any ideas on how to avoid it,
please let me know. Thanks - jrs@netcom.com.

This unofficial summary is copyright (c) 1992 by John Switzer.
All Rights Reserved. Distribution of this unofficial summary to
other electronic forums and bulletin boards is highly encouraged.
Spelling and other corrections gratefully received.

Please read the standard disclaimer which was included with the
first summary for this month. In particular, please note that
this summary is not approved or sanctioned by Rush Limbaugh or
the EIB network, nor do I have any connection with them other as
a daily listener.

******************************************************************

August 28, 1992

MORNING UPDATE

Rush has some environmental news that makes no sense. The July
1974 issue of Readers Digest contains excerpts from a piece
written by Tom Alexander who writes that "ominous changes in the
world's weather" may indicate a "global cooling trend that could
bring massive tragedies for mankind."

Rush points out that ice ages take thousands or millions of years
to happen, yet people in 1974 thought that they were in the
middle of one. Now after only 18 years the scare is global
warming. This is just hysteria on the part of the left and Rush
warns his listeners that they shouldn't buy into it.

Similarly, Al Gore writes in his "Earth in the Balance," page
325, that "we now know that automobiles' cumulative impact on the
environment is posing a mortal threat to the security of every
nation that is more deadly than that of any military enemy that
we are again likely to confront."

In other words, a Mazda is more dangerous to the Earth than a
nuclear arsenal, according to a man who thinks he is qualified to
be Vice President of the United States. There are two lessons to
be learned in this - don't listen to Democrats, and if you don't
like the weather, all you have to do is wait 18 years.

FIRST HOUR

Item

o       Rush might as well go home because his career is over.
Mail is pouring in from people who claim Rush is just a lackey to
George Bush. One writer states with assurance that Rush will
"soon go the way of Morton Downey, Jr." Rush comments that his
show has been nationwide for four years and is still growing;
Morton Downey, Jr. has never lasted more than 13 months anywhere.

"Rush has decided to do the dirty work of the GOP," states the
letter writer, who then wonders "does Rush expect George Bush to
pick up votes because of the Woody Allen mess?" Rush laughs and
says "of course not." He points out that the Buchananites first
prophesied that Rush's lack of support for Buchanan would be the
end of his credibility. When Rush said something kind about
Buchanan, the Bush people then attacked him. Finally, the Perot
people were certain that Rush's lack of support for their hero
would doom him as well.

The EIB staff starts up the music to "When Johnny Comes Marching
Home," and Rush comments that TNT showed "Dr. Strangelove" last
night and he had forgotten how funny this movie is. Rush admits,
though, that his career may well be in jeopardy and instructs his
staff to find Tony Lo Bianco and have him standing by so that
should the worst happen, Lo Bianco could pick up where Rush left
off.

The season premiere for the Murphy Brown TV show was announced
yesterday - a special hour-long episode will be shown on
September 28th, and it's widely rumored that it will contain a
response to Dan Quayle's critique of Murphy Brown back in May.
After yesterday's show Rush returned to his desk and found a
package containing a "secret" script from the Murphy Brown show.

The person who sent the script wants to remain anonymous because
he is writer for a "top sitcom" and fears that he could be
blackballed. However, he took the risk of sending the script to
Rush because he is Republican and thinks Rush should warn people
about what's in the Murphy Brown season premiere. Rush's
suspicions, though, were raised when he saw page two of the
script which reads as follows:

"Dear reader, we implore you to keep the contents of this script
secretly confidential. If any of this material finds its way to
the press, Murphy Brown will not get the ratings it deserves.
Thank you in advance for your cooperation."

Rush says that he didn't just fall off the cabbage truck, and he
just can't believe that he would received a signed letter from
someone who is also worried that his career might be ruined if
his identity were revealed. Thus, Rush thinks that this script is
a setup, and that the Murphy Brown producers are hoping to use
Rush to get some free, nationwide publicity.

The EIB staff thinks Rush is being too cynical, but he disagrees.
He does reveal, though, that Vice President Quayle is the other
person who has received a copy of this "super secret" script.
Rush thinks that this script has the same smell about it as did
the "secret" fax he received from the Democratic National
Committee; that fax supposedly blew the lid off of Al Gore's book
and showed how vulnerable he is because of it. However, when Rush
checked the facts in the fax, he saw that it was a setup.

Rush says that this script could be a true leak or it could be a
manufactured leak so that Rush would talk about it and increase
viewer interest in the show. The script could even be a dummy
script that was sent to him in the hope that he would talk about
it, and then be totally embarrassed when the real show is aired
on the 28th.

Rush is certain of the chicanerous character of this script
because Hollywood is so intolerant that Christians and
conservatives have to keep quiet about their affiliations in
order to keep working. The letter with the script, though, is on
the official letterhead of the sitcom for which the guy who sent
the package works, and Rush has a hard time believing that this
person would trust his entire career to him, especially since
they haven't met.

The EIB staff points out that everyone knows Rush can be trusted
in a Motel 6 overnight with wives, daughters, and little animals.
However, he is still suspicious because he got a copy of the
script on the same day on which that the season premiere was
announced. Rush bets that the perpetrators of this deception
undoubtedly think he would be duped by the glamour of Hollywood,
but Rush says "I'm smarter than that, folks."

*BREAK*

Last night Rush talked about this script during the rehearsal for
his TV show. However, he made the point last night that he wants
people to watch the season premiere of Murphy Brown. He's not
going to try to discourage people from watching it because, after
all, he is a supporter of the First Amendment. However, after
watching the sitcom, people shouldn't forget to tune in Rush's
own show that same night because Rush will analyze the show and
tell people what they should think about it.

The reference to Quayle in the script is pretty pointed and
hard-hitting, but it's not that bad, and the show is not built
about ridiculing Quayle. The EIB staff asks Rush if he's gotten a
copy of the season premiere script of the Simpsons, and Rush
answers in the negative. He doubts that this would happen because
he's heard that Matt Groening doesn't like him at all.

Items

o       Going on to other news, state troopers in Lone Pine, PA
found a naked man handcuffed to a tree at a rest stop near
highway 79. The troopers were responding to reports that five
nude men were having sex in the trees, and they discovered that
the tied-up man was a willing participant in these festivities.
The man was charged with violating a state law that forbids
illicit sexual activities at interstate rest areas.

Rush laughs at the nature of this charge, and he comments that he
believes that the Gore/Clinton bus caravan passed through this
area on their first tour.

o       The Japanese cabinet is planning the biggest economic
bailout in post-war Japan. The cabinet is hoping to resuscitate
the country's financial industry. Rush points out that a bad
Japanese economy is not good for the US, and he asks when Ronald
Reagan got a chance to cut taxes and raise defense spending in
Japan? After all, liberals blame Reagan for this country's
economic woes, so he must be responsible for Japan's as well.

*BREAK*

Phone   Walter from Eunice, LA

Walter asks Rush if he is a conservative first or a Republican
first. Rush promises to ask the question but asks Walter why he
is asking it. Walter replies that he is a struggling Republican
who is facing the prospect of having to vote for a man, President
Bush, who has not done anything to help the oil industry, which
is the industry that Walter is in.

Rush says that the oil industry's problems predate 1988, and
Walter agrees. However, he looks at Bush's record of inaction,
and he doesn't like how Bush is not a real conservative. Rush
thinks that this is a good topic because he is being inundated by
mail from conservatives who accuse him of selling out.

Rush says that what is important to him is the country - this
means more to him than any specific concern that he personally
might have. For this reason, Rush expects a President to provide
leadership that will create an atmosphere that will allow
Americans to pursue their personal goals. Rush does not, though,
expect the President to put forth any proposals to help him or
his specific industry.

Bush is certainly not a conservative, although he articulates
conservatism in his campaigns. This has created a credibility
problem for Bush, which is why he is trying to convince voters
that his next four years will be different from his first four.
In any case, Bush is by no means the conservative ideal.

However, choosing Bush is not difficult for Rush, especially when
he's compared to Clinton. Since Rush cares about the country, he
does not want Clinton to be elected. Having Clinton as President
would be a great thing for Rush since it would make his show an
easy thing to do for the next four years. However, Rush is not
this short-sighted and does not want to ruin the country for his
own sake.

Walter says that he knows Republicans are more conservative than
the Democrats, and that the Democrats' main motivation in
politics is to spend money. Walter would vote for Bush today
because he knows he can't vote for a Democrat who will worsen his
situation even more than it is now, but he is still concerned
that he is not getting any help from his party. Walter just
doesn't see any real conservatives in the party.

Rush says that a lot of conservatives are out there, but the Bush
administration is keeping them out of sight. Walter asks Rush if
he thinks the country is going in the right direction under
Bush's leadership, especially since Bush seems to be dismantling
the Reagan legacy. Rush says that the Republican party is still
the home of the conservative movement, and he thinks things will
go a lot closer to the direction he would like under Bush than
under Clinton.

There is no "conservative party" and it may be fine to lament
this fact, but in the meantime conservatives have to take what
exists and build on it. Rush points out, though, that the success
of his show occurred mainly during the Bush administration, which
means that people have far more control over their own destinies
than does any President in Washington.

Walter, though, remembers the gas lines of 1973, and he thinks
that this will happen again. In 1992, the US is importing about
4% more foreign oil than it did in 1973, and thus the country is
more vulnerable than it was 20 years ago. Aramco is still
controlling Middle East oil, and thus another cartel could
develop. Rush holds Walter over the break.

*BREAK*

Phone   Walter from Eunice, LA

Walter says he fears that if the US guarantees the security of
the Middle East, then their oil producers will soon realize that
they can make more by producing less. Walter is also worried
about the free trade agreement Bush is proposing. Rush says that
NAFTA could actually help the US in any oil crisis since the US
could import Mexican oil. Also, the Soviet Union is no longer
destabilizing the world, and this is something to remember as
well.

However, Rush recalls how during the Gulf War, people were
accusing Bush of wanting to start a war so that the oil prices
could be artificially inflated. What really happened, though, was
that once the US showed it was serious, the price of oil dropped,
and it's lower now than just before the Gulf War.

In any case, electing Clinton is not going to improve any of
these situations. Conservatives have every right to be angry
about Bush, but at least James Baker is giving supply-sider
speeches now. Granted, this may just be campaign rhetoric, but if
Bush is going to be re-elected he will have to convince people
that he has learned his lesson. If Clinton is elected, though,
liberalism will run amuck.

Some conservatives think that a Clinton administration is worth
the risk because conservatives might be able to triumph in 1996.
Rush doesn't think the risk is worth it, and instead believes
that conservatives stand a better chance with a second Bush
administration.

*BREAK*

Rush points out that it was George Bush who went to war in order
to maintain the free flow of oil at market prices; Congress did
not do this, and Rush doubts that Clinton would have either. Had
Clinton or any other liberal been in charge in 1990, Rush bets
that gasoline would now be $3 a gallon, and the US would be
showing its impotency by still insisting on sanctions against
Iraq.

*BREAK*

SECOND HOUR

Items

o       Rush comments that the bumper music today sounds muddy,
without much resonance on the highs; however, he tells his staff
not to worry about it because "with their cheap AM radio
speakers, who will know?"

o       The battle over the Spotted Owl in the Pacific Northwest
has centered on the theory that these owls must live in old
growth forests or they will die. Rush, though, has always
believed that the Spotted Owl "crisis" is a hoax that was
manufactured to allow environmentalists to advance their
socialist agenda. Environmentalists want government to usurp
private property rights and to enact strict controls on the way
business uses the environment.

There's more evidence, though, that these owls don't care at all
about whether a forest is old growth or not. The Spotted Owl is
an "idiot" that has no idea whether it is living in an old growth
forest or eating an old growth mouse. Owls will adapt if
necessary, just the swallows did when they returned to Capistrano
this year. The swallows found out that Capistrano had changed too
much for them, and thus decided to move to Irvine. There were no
mass bird suicides just because these swallows no longer had
their traditional homes.

Yesterday's San Francisco Chronicle reports that Spotted Owls are
thriving in young California forests. This news confirms previous
reports that these owls are living in 30-year old forests grown
by Boise Cascade. Supposedly these owls can live only in old
growth forests, but they decided to live in a forest that is
destined to be chopped down sooner or later. The owls, though,
are adapting just fine.

Biologists have found that the Spotted Owl is now thriving in
California, even in areas that were once heavily logged. The
Spotted Owl population is soaring in California, and the number
of known owl territories listed by the California Department of
Fish and Game has climbed from 785 to 1,794 in just five years.

Predictably, environmentalists and animal rights extremists claim
that this data doesn't mean anything because all it shows it that
owls can live in these areas, but not whether they can "survive."
Rush, though, thinks that a skyrocketing owl population is a good
indicator of just how well the owl is surviving.

The environmental movement is a direct attack against the
American way of life, and environmental socialists use their
time-honored technique of presenting everything as a crisis, so
that they can scare people into acting now, without considering
all the data or all the options. These socialists have already
convinced many Americans that the Spotted Owl is more important
than jobs.

Having someone like Al Gore on the Democratic ticket points out
the hypocrisy of both the Democrats and environmental socialists.
The Democrats castigate Bush for not doing enough to create more
American jobs, yet they then turn around and say that the loss of
30,000 jobs is a "fair" exchange in return for the Spotted Owl's
supposed survival, even when it is being proven daily that the
owl doesn't need old growth forests to survive.

o       Rush gives an 800 number which people can use to donate
money to the Red Cross' ongoing relief efforts for those who have
been hurt by Hurricane Andrew - 1-800-842-2200. Rush saw that his
Houston TV affiliate, KHOU, is sending five trucks of goods and
$50,000 to the hurricane victims in Louisiana and Florida.

Rush is amazed at the truly squalid conditions that have resulted
from the passing of Hurricane Andrew, and he thinks that if the
US can mobilize troops for any defense emergency, then it should
be able to respond to massive natural disasters such as this.

People have little if any food, no clean water, and temperatures
are in the 90s. Nightline attacked both Bush and FEMA for not
responding quickly enough to this disaster; FEMA was also
criticized in 1989 for not acting fast enough after Hurricane
Hugo. People, though, are in terrible shape, and the really
horrifying aspect of this is that they could do nothing
whatsoever to stop the hurricane from destroying everything they
had - not just their homes but their whole communities.

Rush has in the past criticized those who think that the federal
government should solve every problem in society, yet this
problem is one that should be the province of the federal
government, and one that the entire country should be willing to
band together in order to solve.

*BREAK*

Rush wishes a happy birthday to Johnny Donovan, who is 93 years
old today. Rush takes another look at the board and makes a
correction - Donovan is only 39. Donovan is too shy to come into
the studio because he doesn't want to make a big deal about his
birthday. Rush knows that Donovan is secretly hoping that people
will throw him a surprise party; however, Rush tells him to
forget that idea - if his employees say that they don't want to
have a big deal made of their birthdays, Rush will not make a big
deal out of their birthdays.

Donovan, though, will be spending the weekend at his Long Island
beachhouse, Ft. Donovan, which is so named because of his
devotion to the second amendment. Rush warns anyone who might be
thinking of visiting that there are Gatling guns in the shrubs.

Phone   Tom from Jupiter, FL

Tom read the article about Rush in this month's American
Spectator, but it didn't tell him which half of his brain is tied
behind his back - is it the analytical left side or creative
right side? Rush says that he ties the right side of his brain
behind his back because the left side controls all of the brain's
functions. However, Rush still can access the right side of his
brain when needed.

Tom doesn't think that this is fair, but Rush says that he can
"only do so much." No matter what Rush does, though, he's going
to have an advantage over others. Tom is glad that Rush is now
abiding by truth-in-advertising laws, and comments that he was in
hurricane-devastated Homestead, FL yesterday. Most of the major
roads are open, and he was impressed by how much the private
sector was doing to help each other. Churches, civic
organizations, and others are working together to help people
recover from this.

Rush is glad to hear this - although the federal government can
help, the real solutions will come from people helping people,
whether they be in-town or out-of-state. It's the private sector
and individual acts of goodness that will make the difference.

*BREAK*

Phone   Brendan from Cambridge, MA

Brendan had an altercation with some animal rights activists at
Chicago University last year. The activists were protesting the
medical school, and when Brendan told them to get out of his way,
they accused him of being a "speciesist." Brendan replied that he
must be so because he considered the activists to be jackasses.

Rush says that speciesism is a derogatory term applied to humans
who dare think that they are superior to other animals. Anyone
who does not think all animals are totally equal is a speciesist,
and Rush calls this "just more whacko, real screwballism." And
where is the home for these wackos? The Democratic party, of
course.

Phone   Tonie from Tucson, AZ

Tonie saw a disturbing graphic on NBC News both last night and
this morning. Last night during a story about the campaigns of
President Bush and Bill Clinton, they showed Bush talking about
how Clinton's economic plan would require a $150 billion in new
taxes. However, NBC superimposed the word "WRONG" across the
image of Bush. NBC then showed a picture of Reagan and Bush, and
an announcer claimed that the Reagan tax bill implemented a $152
billion tax increase.

Rush asks if Tonie is certain that NBC put this graphic on the
screen, as opposed to it being part of a Clinton ad. Tonie says
that the graphic was from NBC, and she called Accuracy in the
Media to find out if they knew about it. She is angry that the
NBC News people are inferring that George Bush is lying,
especially when they do it in such a superficial manner without
any supporting evidence.

Rush says that he noticed during the Republican convention that
Peter Jennings was pointing out in his analysis of Buchanan's
speech everything that he thought was wrong. Rush doesn't
remember seeing this kind of editorializing going on before in
the TV news media.

Tonie says that this is exactly what is going on with the NBC
News programs. This morning NBC put up their "WRONG" graphic over
a picture of Buchanan quoting what Hillary Clinton wrote in the
Harvard Law Review in 1979. Rush says that this critique was what
Peter Jennings did, too, and this is aggravating because Buchanan
was faithful in his quote of Hillary.

As far as taxes go, the Democrats didn't criticize Bush's
betrayal of his no new taxes pledge before the convention; at the
time Rush theorized that this was because the Democrats knew they
were planning on raising taxes themselves. However, after the
convention the Democrats started attacking Bush on precisely this
issue, which indicated that they were feeling very confident
about their chances of winning in November.

The Democrats are now claiming that Bush presided over the
second-largest tax increase in American history, and that Reagan
presided over the largest tax increase. There is no dispute that
Reagan did exactly this, but his TEFRA plan was designed to
reduce the deficit. At the time there was a great panic over the
deficit and so Reagan cut a deal with Congress - he would agree
to raise taxes, but for every dollar that was raised in new
taxes, Congress had to agree to cut two dollars from the budget.
Congress got their tax increases, but they never delivered on
their spending cuts.

Bush's participation in the 1990 Budget Deal is not disputable
either, but what is not stated by the Democrats is that every tax
increase in that deal was a Democratic proposal. Bush's mistake
was in agreeing with the Democrats and with their proposals. The
Democrats, though, are conveniently ignoring this fact.

The luxury tax, for example, was a "punish the rich" style
program, straight from the liberal Democrat handbook. The top tax
rate was also raised from 28% to 31% so as to "make the rich pay
their fair share." Bush should now stop attacking Clinton's $150
billion tax increase, and instead start talking about how
everyone in America now knows that the 1990 tax increases were a
mistake. However, Clinton's economic plan is nothing more than a
repeat of what happened in 1990.

Bush should link Clinton's plan with the 1990 Budget Deal and
then warn people that if Clinton is elected, he will be nothing
more than a rubber stamp for a liberal Congress that will enact
more of the same. Bush should portray himself as the only person
the American people have who will stop the Democratic Congress
from doing this again, which would only make this three year
recession even worse.

This is why Bush was elected in the first place - to stop the
liberals, and he will have to make this case to the American
people. Bush will have to show that Clinton wants to repeat the
mistakes of 1990, and show how this will further destroy the
American economy.

*BREAK*

Phone   Mary from Pittsburgh, PA

Mary was a dyed-in-the-wool Democrat who realized that she made a
mistake when she voted for JFK. Since then she has been a loyal
Republican, and Rush welcomes her to the fold. Mary regularly
visits the chiropractor and always takes her radio along so she
can listen to Rush; however, the last time she went was on a
Saturday and she was disappointed that she couldn't hear Rush's
show. Rush predicts that soon, "Best of Rush" shows will be
playing on the weekends, everywhere.

*BREAK*

Phone   Elaine from Callensburg, PA

Elaine saw a story about how Clinton's caravan bumped two
honeymooners out of their hotel. Monday night's local paper
related how David and Anne Ward had booked a honeymoon suite
three months in advance at the Comfort Inn in Millcreek Township.
However, two days before their wedding, they were told that they
wouldn't be able to have their room because Clinton was coming
into town.

The couple then rented another room at a second hotel, but on the
night of their wedding they were told that they would have to
move again because the Clinton campaign needed that room, too.
Rush says that this is a great example of Clinton's "Putting
People First" plan, and that if the media treated Clinton like
they treated Bush, the headlines would read "Clinton opposes
consummation of marriages."

*BREAK*

THIRD HOUR

Items

o       Bo Snerdley produces a sign to hang on the EIB studio
wall which has all of Tony Lo Bianco's pictures on it. The sign
proclaims "Rush Limbaugh's" in small type, "Tony Lo Bianco" in
large, bold type, and then "Wall of Fame" in small type. Rush
tells Bo to put it up because "I don't mind people feeding off of
me."

o       Rush can't believe, though, that he hasn't gotten one
call from anyone who wants to know what is in the script that he
has for the season premiere of Murphy Brown. This episode is
titled "You Say Potatoe, I Say Potato." Rush wonders, though, if
the reason he hasn't taken any calls on this is because not too
many people care about this sitcom. Rush, though, tells Bo to
"strive to find a call about the script - anybody."

o       The Los Angeles riots are back in the news as the date
for the federal trial of the four cops involved in the Rodney
King beating has been moved back to February 2nd. Thus, this
trial will not be a factor in the elections. However, the trial
of three men accused of beating Reginald Denny is scheduled for
September, and thus may become an election issue.

Patricia Moore, a Compton City Councilwoman, is quoted as saying
"it's very touchy at this time out here. There's no way of
judging justice for African-Americans." Moore doesn't think the
men who beat Denny should be tried since what they did is "no
different" from what the cops did to King.

Rush says that there is a simple way of judging what is justice
for African-Americans - look at what justice is for any American.
Yet Moore and her ilk are just trying to foment this issue so as
to create more strike.

o       Jack "the Dripper" Kevorkian has lost a bid to regain his
medical license in Michigan state. Rush shakes his head as he
ponders a society which refuses to reinstate the medical license
of a doctor, simply because this doctor insists on helping to
kill people. Kevorkian said he would continue to counsel people
who want to die, regardless of this ruling.

Once again Rush says that if people want to kill themselves, then
they soon go ahead and do it, but don't corrupt the American
medical society by turning doctors into licensed killers.

o       Soon-Yi Previn, Woody Allen's paramour, is only 19 years
old, according to her college roommate. The roommate is certain
of this fact because she gave Soon-Yi a birthday party and "there
were only 19 balloons."

o       Bo tells Rush that he did have a caller interested about
the Murphy Brown TV show, but all he wanted to know was how thin
the script's paper was. Rush won't state the caller's purpose in
asking this question but he does say that the script "might be
good in the relief effort in Florida."

o       Rush reads a number of anonymous, liberal heroes for the
90s:

-       The first person to call bums and vagrants "homeless"

-       The first person to blame the Dukakis loss in 1988 on
Willie Horton

-       The first person to call prosperity "greed"

-       The first person to call an obsessive psychotic an
"activist"

-       The first person to refer to illegal aliens as
"undocumented aliens"

-       The first person who changed the term "pro-abortion" to
"pro-choice"

-       The first politician to claim "I'm against the war, but
for the troops"

-       The first liberal to decide that the objective of Desert
Storm was to kill Saddam Hussein

Rush wishes he knew the answers to these questions so that these
heroes could be given the recognition that they so richly
deserve.

*BREAK*

Items

o       During the break Rush received a phone call from a
"highly placed friend in a conservative think tank in New York"
who told him that if the Murphy Brown script was from a certain
person with a certain show, it was probably legitimate. The
friend gave him the name of the person who did indeed send the
script, and thus Rush is now starting to believe that this script
is a legitimate one.

Rush, though, will have to "confer" with others before revealing
more about the contents of the script. The coincidences that are
attached to this script still stretch the bounds of imagination.
However, Rush is intrigued by the thought that if he reveals the
contents of the script, the show's producers may be forced to
rewrite and reshoot the appropriate scenes. This is not an
unpleasing thought to him.

The EIB staff thinks Rush has been living in New York too long
and thus is getting far too cynical. Rush says that this is not
the cause - he is only a conservative icon who knows that the
liberal elite would love to embarrass him in any way possible.

o       According to USA Today, the Presidential Commission on
Debates has proposed that the Bush/Clinton debates be held on
September 22 at Michigan State, October 4 at UC San Diego, and
October 15 at University of Virginia. Rush wonders what the
members of the Presidential Commission on Debates do for the four
years between elections.

Rush saw this group on CSPAN and they appeared to be people who
have the world's problems hanging heavy on their shoulders. Rush
doesn't know why this should be so, though, since the biggest
problems they face is to find the proper leftist news anchors who
can ask properly liberal questions.

*BREAK*

After a thorough investigation, Rush is now convinced that he has
a genuine script from the season premiere of the Murphy Brown
show. Turning to page 43, Rush, though, still isn't sure if he
wants to read it now. He's not afraid of what troubles might come
from his revealing such a secret script of the liberal elite,
however, but there is also much to be said about waiting until
Monday and revealing all in a grandiose manner. Plus, if Rush
waits until Monday, he could stake out his apartment and the EIB
studios and see who tries to break in to steal the script.

Rush decides to take a phone call so he can think about this
momentous decision some more.

Phone   Carol from Bartlesville, OK

Carol and her family was in South America this summer for a two-
month missionary visit in which they helped local missionaries
build a church. She didn't miss Rush's show, though, because a
friend taped his shows every day and sent the tapes down to
Carol's family in Suriname. Even though the tapes were two weeks
late, Rush's show became their link to the outside world. Even
some of the natives became interested in how they could pick up
Rush's show using a short-wave radio. Carol's 10-year old son
listened to the tapes over and over, and used them to explain to
the natives what Ross Perot was all about.

Carol and her family brought back as an immigrant a 20-year old
girl, and the girl has started attending college. She had to
write an essay for her English class about some issue in the
current Presidential campaign, and thanks to Rush's show she
chose to write about family values. Carol is proud that this
foreign student had latched onto an important topic while the
other students were still trying to figure out what to write
about. Rush says "I bet that the rest of those jerk students are
voting for Clinton."

Carol also worked with a Christian school while in Suriname, and
the typical teacher's salary was about $65 a month. Of course,
the cost of living is cheaper there, but nonetheless this salary
is in stark contrast to the average US teachers' salary of
$34,000. Rush comments that he forgot to add yesterday that the
salaries he listed include all of the benefits that teachers
normally get, including working only 9 months a year. Plus, if
teachers are lucky enough to end up in New York, they get to
teach about anal sex.

Phone   Byron from Clearwater, FL

Byron saw an article in the Wall Street Journal yesterday about
the influence that lawyers have over Bill Clinton. According to
the story, David H. Williams, President of the Arkansas Trial
Lawyers Association, sent out a fund-raising letter for Clinton
in which he asked the state's lawyers "to dig down deep and dig."

Furthermore, in his letter Williams praised Clinton for stopping
legal reforms in 1987; when news of these reforms reached the
ATLA, "we immediately got on the phone to the governor, and the
tort reforms part of the legislative package was pulled. During
another session, I remember a bill that whistled through the
Arkansas House and Senate that would have given immunity from
liability to `Good Samaritan' doctors who provided medical care
to indigent patients. Once again, we got on the horn to Governor
Clinton who vetoed the bill."

Byron can't believe that this is about the same Presidential
candidate who claims he is outraged about the lack of health care
for the poor. Rush reads part of Jeff Greenfield's column today
about how Bush is not focusing on the right aspects of Clinton's
record. In particular, Greenfield believes that Bush should be
concentrating on Clinton's "political and financial bondage to
the legal profession which stands in the way of structural change
in areas ranging from health care to the country's
infrastructure."

This is something that Clinton is vulnerable to, and Rush thanks
Byron for calling about it.

*BREAK*

Rush has decided to read the Murphy Brown script, at least the
most important part. Murphy and Frank are watching the news, and
Vice President Quayle is shown making his famous comments about
the Murphy Brown show. Brown wonders how she could be glamorizing
single motherhood - "look at me, Frank," she says, "am I
glamorous?" Frank answers "of course not, you look disgusting."

Brown replies "you're damn right, people in prison get to shower
more than I do, and what was that crack about `just another
life-style choice'?" Brown then says that she agonized about
whether she should have had the baby or not. Frank says that he
doesn't blame Brown for being angry, but tells her "but wait
until Rush Limbaugh has commented on this before you decide what
you think about it. Rush Limbaugh understands all of this stuff
very well. Before you blow your gasket, if Limbaugh criticizes
Quayle, then you go ahead. But if Limbaugh doesn't, stay out of
it, Murph."

For a second, Rush tries to make the audience believe that this
is actually what the script says, but he can't keep a straight
face about it. He goes back and starts reading from the script
again. Frank says "Murph, I don't blame you for being angry about
it, but consider the source - this is a man who gave a speech to
the United Negro College Fund and said `what a waste it is to
lose one's mind,' and then he spent the rest of his term showing
the country exactly what he meant. Tomorrow he'll probably get
his head stuck in his golf bag and you'll be old news."

Murphy says that she's too tired to think and just wants to take
a shower. "I shouldn't let it bother me. After all, it's not the
kind of thing anyone will pay any attention to." The rest of the
script is about how all the various members of the media want to
interview Brown.

Phone   Dante from Daytona Beach, FL

Dante asks what Rush would do if he were President to get medical
insurance for the 30 million or so American workers who don't
have insurance coverage. Rush replies that there are no overnight
fixes, but the first thing that has to be done is to introduce
market forces into the health care industry at all levels.

To do this will involve reforming the American legal system,
especially torts. Some doctors are now refusing to perform
certain procedures because the malpractice insurance is so high,
and these costs get passed on to consumers. Rush knows doctors 50
years and older who are saying that they will quit medicine if
Clinton is elected because they don't want to end up under the
control of the federal government.

The next step must be to find a system in which people insure
themselves. Everybody is already paying for their own health
insurance, one way of another. Even if one's employer supposedly
is paying for health coverage, the employee is still paying for
it in the form of lower salaries. To include market forces in
this means that everybody has to pay for their own insurance.
Thus, some way must be found to allow people to buy insurance at
lower group rates, in such a manner that they retain their
insurance even if they leave their current job.

Hospitals charge $2,000 a night for a room, and this cost is past
on through the insurance industry. However, direct government
involvement in this industry has only made things worse, which is
why market forces must be given a chance to work.

*BREAK*

Phone   Scott from San Antonio, TX

Scott thinks Rush does a good Ross Perot but wants to know when
he's going to try to imitate Bill Clinton. Rush thinks this is a
good question, and as Johnny Preston's "Charming Billy" starts
playing Rush makes some kissing and moaning sounds.


-- 
John Switzer               | "Don't mess with me, man!
                           | I'm a higher mammal!"
74076.1250@Compuserve.com  | 
jrs@netcom.com             | 
Newsgroups: alt.fan.rush-limbaugh