HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: greg@cherokee.b23b.ingr.com (Greg Moritz)
Subject: Re: Alarm Suprize!
Reply-To: greg@cherokee.b23b.ingr.com (Greg Moritz)
Organization: Dazix, An Intergraph Company
Date: Thu, 8 Oct 1992 13:05:54 GMT

> potler@umbc4.umbc.edu (Laura Potler (GSFC)) writes:
> >  unrelatedpeeve: setting your alarm at night and waking up the next 
> >  morning to discover that the station you've set to has completely 
> >  different programming in the morning.

You might have ventured into the phenominon of atmospheric 'skip' where
an AM station has its' signal bouncing off the atmosphere, only to come
back down hundreds of miles away into your receiver.  Here in Huntsville,
Alabama, I can pick up Dallas, Boston, Pittsburg, etc.  At night, 1000 
on the AM band is a station out of Chicago.  In the day, it is a local
broadcast.  (The local station shuts down at night.)
  
hillman@carina.unm.edu (Dan Hillman) responds:
>  RelatedPeeve: Without fail, that waking-up song will go through your 
>  head until lunch, sometimes longer. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhgh!!!

A little trick that I have discovered is to sit and listen to (endure)
that waking-up song (no matter how bad) until it is over.  You won't 
then have to put up with it in your head any more that day.

My theory on *why* this works is as follows:

   If you turn off the song in mid-stream, your brain will unconciously
   try to complete the rest of the song --> drilling it into your psyche.

   The theory can be put to the test as follows -- try whistling some
   little ditty (I frequently use "Hooray for Hollywood" or "Tequila!"
   Anything annoying, but well-known and catchy will do.) near some poor,
   unaware sucker.  Almost without fail, a few minutes later, you will
   catch them humming or whistling the same tune.  The trick is, just
   be sure to stop yourself in the middle of a passage.  The (sub-
   conscious) listener's brain will not be able to resist the temptation
   to complete the passage.  Thus, they will be 'hooked' on that
   little melody that you have just implanted in their brain.
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: jen187@mis.csiro.au (Graham Jenkins +61 6 276 6812)
Subject: Re: Pained Whale?
Organization: CSIRO ITS
Date: Thu, 8 Oct 92 06:58:28 GMT

In article <1ash0rINNfsd@bigboote.WPI.EDU> padutton@wpi.WPI.EDU (Peter Alan Dutton) writes:


>
>Peeve: KFC Popcorn Chicken tastes really good. Unfortunately, you need a
>	tub of Maalox afterwards...
>

Perhaps you might care to explain to we inhabitants of the better
end og the planet what Maalox is. Do you eat it? Rub it on your skin?
Stick it up your arse?  All of the above?


-- 

|  Graham Jenkins          |  graham.jenkins@its.csiro.au           | 
|  CSIRO                   |  (Commonwealth Scientific & Industrial | 
|  Canberra,  AUSTRALIA    |  Research Organisation)                |
From: fofp@castle.ed.ac.uk (M Holmes)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Pained Whale?
Date: 7 Oct 92 18:01:06 GMT
Organization: Edinburgh University


>In article <1992Oct06.005208.22550@CS.ORST.EDU> tim@physics.orst.edu writes:
>>
>> The group has been somewhat boring lately anyway, someone should post
>> some recipes that actually work.  

Microwave Food:

a) Read timing information on packet.

b) Do like it says.

That's it. A great meal every time :-)

-- Mike "Gourmet" Holmes
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: nolan@twg.com (Alois Morandel)
Subject: Re: Japanese Tourists ate my building.
Reply-To: nolan@twg.com
Organization: Institute for the Detention of the Brain Dead
Date: Tue, 13 Oct 1992 17:04:00 GMT


In article <1992Oct12.210751.26975@twg.com>, donp@twg.com, The Cross I Must
Bear, babbles:

[preliminary delusions deleted]

|>No my friend, you are not. My office mate Nolan (gabby) Hinshaw and
|>myself are drowning in the sea of amour too.

[and he drivels off yet deeper into fantasy land]

Go away! Acquire an existence. Ask your doctor for a change in your meds. Get
a new delusional system. Make good friends with one or both of your hands. Hie
thee to a nunnery (that'd be a sight). Whatever you do, speak for yourself.
May Japanese tourists eat your workstation!

I'm too old to drown - I surf the crests on the sea of amour.

Peeve! My officemate, the esteemed Don-Boy. He's pushin' 40 but you'd think he
was in high school, needing a buddy along on an adventure. All he's been good
for so far, aside from work-related triviata, is an occasional quotable
malapropism, like that in the signature. He's a perfect candidate for
experimental psychosurgery.  I can't decide whether he or Mr. Alt.tasteless'
officeneighbor is the more diffucult.

--
Nolan "Will geek for fun" Hinshaw
Internet: nolan@twg.com			Dingalingnet: (415)962-7197	
"Grab Dick and come on down"  Don Pette
"Texas is like an old woman's pussy.  Everyone knows its down there but
nobody gives a fuck."  - Overheard on CB radio, compliments of 
	bberbeni@nyx.cs.du.edu (Bill Berbenich)
"Boy, was I in for a dose of reality." Randall K. Abler
"... necrophilia doesn't really hurt anybody."  Rick Gordon
"Well, first of all, your stance is too wide"
From: geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM (Geoff Miller)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Colourful Money
Keywords: Losers
Date: 14 Oct 92 22:05:30 GMT
Followup-To: alt.peeves
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Menlo Park, Ca.
NNTP-Posting-Host: purplehaze.corp.sun.com



In article <1992Oct13.205731.1185@CS.ORST.EDU> tim@physics.orst.edu 
really sticks his finger in it by writing:

>As most of you know, much of Holland is land reclaimed from the sea
>and protected from said watery nemesis by large dykes. 


On bikes?

"Dikes," Tim, "dikes!"



Geoff


-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-
Geoff Miller                    + + + + + + + +        Sun Microsystems
geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM  + + + + + + + +     Menlo Park, California
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From: dac@prolix.apana.org.au (Andrew Clayton)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Take me to the April sun in Cuba.
Date: Wed, 14 Oct 1992 12:11:33 GMT
Organization: More like Dis~, really.
X-Newsreader: Arn V1.00 beta rel2

Peeve:  [Deem Compunerdygeekisms included] - coding in a new
script language, where the language interpreter has lotsa bugs,
isn't documented, and the product you're installing is intimately
dependant upon the fucking thing working perfectly.

!Peeve: Tom Holt's "Expecting Someone Taller". Go the
Rhinedaughters!

Dac
--
dac@prolix.apana.org.au              David Andrew Clayton.           // _| _  _
dac@prolix.sserve.cc.adfa.oz.au      Canberra, Australia           \X/ (_](_](_

** NOTE ** my mailfeed is currently UP!
From: jeremy@castle.ed.ac.uk (Jeremy Henderson)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Marketeers from Hell
Date: 14 Oct 92 12:05:40 GMT
Organization: Edinburgh University

In article <5460001@hpldsla.sid.hp.com> ssouth@hpldsla.sid.hp.com (Steve South) writes:
~Peeve: Broderbund. So they make this *wonderful* program called Kidpix. My
~       4.5 year old boy loves it. So do I. But what's the peeve? Well,
~       they sent us their latest blurb, advertising Kidpix Companion, an 
~       add-on to Kidpix. Boy sees ad, we read it to him, he wants it, we
~       say okay. Now try to find the product. At least 6 weeks later, no
~       sign of said product for messy-dross.  Call Broderbund. Not released
~       yet. When? He's not allowed to tell me. Try explaining that to a
~       disappointed 4.5 year old.

Just be thankful the kid doesn't want MacWrite Pro. He'll be a teenager
before Claris get the thing out of the door.

More Peeves: Morse and Feschbach. These two clowns wrote a book called
"Methods in Theoretical Physics" or some such name, full of useful stuff
for doing Difficult Problems ....except.....

They insist on using obscure characters from strange alphabets in their
equations. This makes it very difficult to read and remember. For example,
it's easy to remember "ee equals em see squared", but very difficult to
remember "sort of squirly thing with a straight bit in the middle equals
scrunched up B with a bit of a gap in the top multiplied by the square of
wiggly kind of a Y thing with a long tail". Physics is hard enough, without
making it unnecessarily harder!


-- 
===Jeremy Henderson===jeremy@castle.ed.ac.uk=          
          "That's too Libertarian for me"
                         Mike Holmes 
                             (don't deny it, Holmes!)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: nolan@twg.com (Ananaias)
Subject: Ooooh Am I the only one who got it? was (e: Self-Assembly)
Reply-To: nolan@twg.com
Organization: Pharisees Anonymous
Date: Mon, 12 Oct 1992 21:36:54 GMT


In article <5790@catnip.berkeley.ca.us>, dre@catnip.berkeley.ca.us (I would like to return this TOBACCONIST; it is scratched) writes:
[deletia]
|>mhart@blackjack.dt.navy.mil (Michael Hart) writes:
[dialog about furniture making deleted]
|>>It is indeed an art form.  People who are able to make furniture,
|>>real furniture, are craftsman, artisans.  People who can nail together
|>>boards and make functional bookcases and "This End Up"(tm) 
|>>crate-style furniture are, at best, carpenter-like.
|>				       ^^^^^^^^^
|>
|>Jesus Christ!

Great pun! As of this followup, no one seems to have got it. Hm...
Implications abound, like JC was only a carpenter and not a craftsman...
Merely a hacker of wood and not a joiner ... The mind boggles.

--
Nolan "If I had a hammer / The world'd be a nail" Hinshaw
Internet: nolan@twg.com			Dingalingnet: (415)962-7197	
"Grab Dick and come on down"  Don Pette
"Texas is like an old woman's pussy.  Everyone knows its down there but
nobody gives a fuck."  - Overheard on CB radio, compliments of 
	bberbeni@nyx.cs.du.edu (Bill Berbenich)
"Boy, was I in for a dose of reality." Randall K. Abler
"... necrophilia doesn't really hurt anybody."  Rick Gordon
"Well, first of all, your stance is too wide"
From: geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM (Mahmoud ibn-Purplehazi, net.terrorist)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Meeting Rah-Rahs
Date: 16 Oct 92 17:45:52 GMT
Reply-To: geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM (Mahmoud ibn-Purplehazi, net.terrorist)
Distribution: alt
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Inc.  Mt. View, Ca.
NNTP-Posting-Host: purplehaze.corp.sun.com



I've peeved before about meetings, but yesterday I was reminded of a facet
of meetings that was previously unexamined: the Meeting Rah-Rah.

My department has mercifully few meetings, and between email and office 
conversation, we have ample warning of them.  I know when the things are
scheduled to start, where they'll be held, and I'm admirably capable of
transporting myself to the appropriate four-dimensional confluence without 
outside monitoring or assistance.

Unfortunately, there are people in my department who feel it necessary to
push and prod the rest of us as meeting time approaches, and who come around
and announce that The Time Is Drawing Near.  They remind me of gnats buzzing
in my ear when I'm trying to read.  If I fail to get out of my chair soon 
enough to satisfy these people, they start getting edgy and prod me harder: 
"Come on, Geoff, it's time for the meeting!"  "Yeah, yeah, go ahead; I'll 
see you there," I reply impatiently, pointedly not looking up from my monitor.
They invariably fail to take the hint.  One of these people is particularly
annoying because she's unable to say anything without giggling like a school-
girl; the other, being my officemate, is annoying because of her proximity
and the fact that I'm a captive audience.  It's the same every time: as she
reads her email, just prior to speaking to me, she'll say "Okay!" as a 
prelude to the actual "let's go to the meeting" prod -- sort of a "message 
follows" heads-up.  "Oh shit," I think to myself; "Here it comes."  "Geoff!
It's time for the meeting!"  Wonderful.

At least part of the explanation for this behavior, I'm convinced, is the 
herding instinct -- the same genetic imperative that caused the young mother 
with two noisy preshcoolers to sit at the table next to mine at the Menlo Park
McDonalds yesterday, even though there were plenty of open tables and I'd
deliberately selected a spot in a remote corner of the restaurant so I
could read in peace while I ate my lunch.  There are precious few true
mavericks in the human race, and more's the pity.


Geoff


-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-
Geoff Miller                    + + + + + + + +        Sun Microsystems
geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM  + + + + + + + +     Menlo Park, California
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From: russ@bbxrbk (Russ Kepler)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Self-Assembly (was Caffeine and mornings)
Date: 9 Oct 92 01:52:34 GMT
Organization: /etc/organization

In article <1yhplnf@lynx.unm.edu> hillman@carina.unm.edu (Dan Hillman) writes:
>In article <ld92c9INNd8a@jethro.Corp.Sun.COM> geoffm@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM (Geoff Miller) writes:
>>
>>>=Jesus Christ!
>>
>>>Well, on a crutch.
>>
>>On a Jetski.
>
>In a foot-stompin', face-smashin', chaw-chewin', butt-kickin', gonad-rippin',
>pit-smellin', loogie-spittin', mantool-swellin' monster truck from hell on
>the sabbath.

Dan, I think that you've been stuck in the university just a little
bit too long.  Let's go out and kill something - maybe that'll work
out some of this aggression.  I did see some bunnys lined up recently
- I'll take the right, you take the left and we'll see just how long
it takes them to figure it out.

Peeve: Got me my S&W 629, got the dies for the Dillon, even have some
brass to load, but no molds to cast up bullets.  What's a guy to do?

-- 
Russ Kepler, posting from home
Will hack unix for food 		(.sig stolen from dt - sorry, dt)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: ataylor@nmsu.edu (Nosy)
Subject: Re: Debate?
Organization: NMSU Computer Science
Distribution: alt.peeves
Date: Mon, 12 Oct 1992 21:16:41 GMT

<In article <LARRY.92Oct12093026@peak.psl.nmsu.edu> larry@peak.psl.nmsu.edu (Evil Engineer doin' it the Cowboy Way) writes:

<   Sheesh. I'm peeved that at what is being called a Debate. 

	ObGEEEEEEZZZZZZE!!

	Larry, I'm disappointed; you actually *watched* that thang?
	Hey, you gotta hand in yer membership in the "cynic party"
	right *now*, if that's how you spend Sunday evenings.

	I deliberately missed it by dawdling at the gun show out 
	at Dickerson's Barn until 5:00 (17:00 fer some of you) buying 
	bullets and chatting with the sword collector, then dawdling
	at the range putting holes in paper until after sundown.

	It seemed appropriate, somehow....

ObPeeve: "low-flash" powders that create dramatic fireballs
	 which, while purty to look at, kind of dazzle the old
	 eyeballs.
From: dre@catnip.berkeley.ca.us (I would like to return this TOBACCONIST; it is scratched)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Movie Theatres
Date: 9 Oct 92 20:06:41 GMT
Organization: The San Jose Home for Perverted Hackers

pacific@polari.online.com writes:


>     When I pay six dollars to see a movie, I don't want to  listen
>to another patron talk to a friend about the movie or anything else.
>I would like to hear the dialogue in the film, only.


So go to a fucking drive-in, wimp.
-- 
"If I had killed her when I had first thought about getting divorced,
 I would have been out of jail by now."
	-- A newly-divorced guy I met at a block party
Newsgroups: alt.peeves,alt.tasteless
From: pashdown@javelin.sim.es.com (Pete Ashdown)
Subject: Re: Woe is Me
Organization: Evans & Sutherland Computer Corporation
Date: Wed, 7 Oct 1992 16:01:21 GMT

johnw@bluemoon.rn.com (John L. Wilkerson Jr.) writes:

>v222p9ns@ubvmsb.cc.buffalo.edu (A PFC, AND DAMNED PROUD TO BE) writes:

>    Or... a work experience.    I clean floors at a grocery store.
>     Guy walks down an aisle, blows this greasy vomit, consisting of 
>greasy slime and cube-shaped chunks of meat, approx 1.5 Cubic cm.
>     He does not stop while doing this, but walks on, spewing forth for 
>approximately 30 feet.
>     He sees me and continues on like nothing happened.    Made my week 
>for sure.

Priest or businessman?
-- 
		       "I'm Slash man, Slash!" - Slash

DISCLAIMER: My writings have NOTHING to do with my employer.  Keep it that way.
Pete Ashdown    pashdown@slack.sim.es.com    ...uunet!slack.sim.es.com!pashdown
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: tim@physics.orst.edu (Tim Mefford)
Subject: When I am old I shall be purple
Keywords: Losers
Reply-To: tim@physics.orst.edu
Organization: Up the,
Date: Thu, 15 Oct 1992 00:31:23 GMT

I will put aside the political indignation swelling within me to 
peeve about something closer to home.  Namely my finger.

I sustained a nasty injury to my right "bird" finger a couple of weeks
ago.  According to my eversohelpful doctor, it may, or may not be a
chipped bone.  In any event, it's not not healing at all quickly.
In fact, as I get older, nothing heals.  I can't help but notice
that my finger is no longer straight; it will never be straight.
There is no longer any such thing as "good as new."  I guess the black
and blue shading is something  should get used to.

I don't know which I fear worse; becoming a BDI elderly driver creeping
along at 10 mph or driving like I do now with failed vision and slow
reflexes.

I have a plan though.  Becoming addicted to serious drugs while young
might be quite deleterious to one's health.  At 70, what will I have 
to lose?  Better yet, I'll be much more financially viable at that age
as well.  Right now I'm planning on morphine interspersed with LSD.
At the rate I'm going I will have used up all my health by 60, or sooner,
and will have accumulated enough of these injuries which no longer heal that
I might be able to medically justify a certain amount of my expenses and let
you, the taxpayer, underwrite some of my adventures.  

Another fear: I can no longer eat huge chunks of heavily frosted wedding-like
cake or sugary cream filled doughnuts.  My body chemistry has evolved over the 
years.  My stomach can presently still handle spicy Mexican food.  I've
seen what old people eat.  Is this what I have to look forward to?


^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
"The ripples of sand at his feet suddenly looked like the motionless
 crests of waves.  Supposing they were sound waves, what kind of 
 music would they give? he wondered.  Maybe even a human being could
 sing such a song ... if tongs were driven into his nose and slimy
 blood stopped up his ears ... if his teeth were broken one by one 
 with hammer blows, and splinters jammed into his urethra ... if a
 vulva were cut away and sewn onto his eyelids.  It might resemble
 cruelty, and then again it might be a little different."
				  -Kobo Abe _The Woman_in_the_Dunes_	
------Tim Mefford  tim@physics.orst.edu-----------------------------
From: diana@wetware.com (CatWoman )
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Lou Reed (was Re: credit card peeve)
Date: 11 Oct 92 13:39:32 GMT
Organization: Castle WetWare MouseCatcher

jennyg@titan.ucc.umass.edu (Jenny Gutbezahl) writes:

] donp@twg.com (Don Pette) writes:
] 
] >Lou Reed came out with what I think was his debut album in 1972 or 1973,
] >it was called 'Rock-and-Roll Animal'. Probably had the best two lead
] >guitarists of the day. On the album there was a song called 'Heroin'
] >and there's an urban legend that Lou actually shot-up during the recording
] >of the song. If you've heard the song you'd probably agree. If you've
] >seen Lou you'd probably agree.
] 
] Actually, Lou had been singing Heroin for at least six years before that album
] came out.  You can find it on the first Velvet Underground album, which came
] out in 1967.  The Velvets had been together for slightly over two years,
] working as the house band at the late, great Max's Kansas City in New York, 
] when Andy "The Ego that Ate New York" Warhol discovered them, stuck Nico in
] as a singer & produced the first album. He also sponsored their sensory over-
] loaded tour as part of the Exploding Plastic Inevitable.

Thanks, Jenny - I was fairly sure that the VU album came out 
sooner than that, but being away from home for the weekend, I
couldn't check.

One thing - Nico was listed as "chanteuse" - and as I recall,
she didn't do much singing - just posing (as in standing around
pretending she belonged..).  The album was titled "The Velvet
Underground and Nico" - and it sold a few more copies at the
time than it would have because Warhol put a peel-off banana
on the front (revealing: Another Banana!).

Diana
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: banta@abingdon.Eng.Sun.COM (242 lbs before cooking)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Chunderation
Keywords: elephant, HE, m203
Date: 9 Oct 92 20:38:54 GMT
Organization: Sun, Moon, and Stars
NNTP-Posting-Host: abingdon

(Jenny Gutbezahl) writes:
>Yes, indeedy, indeedy, and I surely hope he'll post often.  Andy and Matt
>are just sooooooooo cute when they're mad.

I'm not mad, Jennypoo.  I'm amused by you, amused that someone such as
yourself could level-headedly put on Barbara Cartland glasses and try
to romanticize the world.  I'm embarrassed for you, embarrassed that
you have such a weak grasp of reality that twittering around
newsgroups can be construed as a fantasy role playing game.  I'm not
angry, because I know you don't have the attention span to keep
dishing this schmaltz onto the net.  Is your life so dull and dreary
that you have to imagine this excitemnet?

>Jenny G proprietoress of Peevetown's favorite greasy spoon, where you can  

No, Jen, you're a student at Umass.  Peevetown has no greasy spoon,
let alone a favorite one, because there is no Peevetown.  Saying
you're "proprietoress" of such an establishment stands singly as
demonstration of your lack of literacy.

>        pick up your copy of the Peevetown Dispatch, or have some of Chef
>        Charles' Bunny Surprise.  Drop in, y'all here.

Yeah, right.  I guess I should have expected this shit in autumn.  I
have little doubt that intellectual integrity and emotionally
stability will return eventually.  All the net is not
alt.romance.chat.

andy
banta@abingdon.sun.com
--
"He who hasn't hacked assembly language as a youth has no
 heart. He who does so as an adult has no brain."  - John Moore
From: Gordon.Riddell@prg.oxford.ac.uk
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re : Esoteric Skinhead O'Connor (was stuff about Mc D's)
Date: 12 Oct 92 16:20:17 GMT
X-Mailer: mail-news 2.0.3


Subject: Re: Esoteric Skinhead O'Connor (Was stuff about Mac D's)
In article <1992Oct08.145353.503@sco.COM> Charles Stross writes cynically:
|In article <BvrJ2B.G0@usenet.ucs.indiana.edu> creps@silver.ucs.indiana.edu (Steve Creps) writes:
|>
|>   Good thing there are all those trim young men in not-so-funny army
|>uniforms to protect the lives of at least some of those ordinary
|>people from being impinged on.  You know, the ones who, when a priest
|>walks by, will stick a machine gun in his face from inside an armoured
|>personnel carrier.
|>
|This may sound cynical, but frankly you stand more chance of being run
|over by a car than being killed in a terrorist incident in NI. My
|theory is that the soldiers are sent there for training purposes ... in
|case they're ever needed on the mainland.

Ireland sure is getting a bashing just now. But I thought as the general thread
was more about the Cafflik Church that Steve was talking about the armies
of various South and central American states rather than the Britsh Army in
his posting.