HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: pfinerty@nyx.cs.du.edu (fun fun fun boy)
Subject: yeah sure.
Organization: Nyx, Public Access Unix @ U. of Denver Math/CS dept.
Date: Sun, 13 Dec 92 07:36:53 GMT


a short while ago i thought i cared. i don't. at least not about others. i
mean, what the hell. all i really i care about right now are two things.
obviously one is not being either thrown in jail or put on probation by
the U.S. attorney general. like i need more to worry about but of course
there is always more. i need to have three good prelim topics semi
researched when i come back from christmas break. fuck. i have two good
ideas but i could use a third. and no, how to shove your head further up
your mothers/fathers asshole does not count. 

so, tonight i go to this party. just a small gathering really, about six
of us. i pull in to my friends apt complex and i see my ex-roommates car.
fuck fuck fuck fuck. like i want to hang out with her. jeeezus. she is
dating this guy who i hang with now and then but not really any more since
he basically tells her every word i speak as far as i can tell and
everyone else for that matter since he is perma-stoned. not that there is
anything wrong with being perma-stoned, it's just that i don't do anything
illegal now. ok. also, the snow is deep in the mountains. so, she is at
this little shin-dig and she has never hung out with us before and does
not really even know the hosts and fuck fuck fuck never mind what the hell
do you care anyway. bye.
--
			PJF--->Biochem. grad student
			      PUBLIC ENEMY #1
From: ken@aiai.ed.ac.uk (Ken Johnson)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Needed: Tacky X-mas gift ideas for my Boss
Date: 17 Dec 92 14:31:57 GMT
Followup-To: talk.bizarre
Organization: William's Wonderful Wonky Widget Warehouse


In article <677@blue.cis.pitt.edu> cap@mb5000.anes.upmc.edu (chris
pilewski) writes:

#  Hi,
#  
#  It's December 14th; an d I'm fresh-out of ideas!  That's why I need some t...
#  
#  I have already thought of "Mr. Microphone," (too common), An Ant farm (Mrs...


Ho-ho-ho! Let's run this request past the ole Auto-Santa-Magic-Matic and
see what it says. 



**  HO-HO-HO! MERRY CHRISTMAS, CHRIS PILEWSKI'S BOSS!!
**  RECOMMENDED CHRISTMAS PRESENTS FOR CHRIS PILEWSKI'S BOSS

1. A zebra
2. A bicycle
3. A compact-disk player
4. A car
5. A house
6. Mary Tyler Moore

**  HO-HO-HO! MERRY CHRISTMAS, CHRIS PILEWSKI!!
**  RECOMMENDED CHRISTMAS PRESENTS FOR CHRIS PILEWSKI

1. A big red box full of \n characters
2. Baby's First Picture Spell Checker
3. Baby's First Editor
4. Baby's First Clue
5. A volcano
6. A giant economy size Fuck Off [tm], from all of us here in talk.bizarre

**  HO-HO-HO! THAT WILL BE 35 POUNDS, PLEASE, PLUS V.A.T. AT 17.5%
**  HO-HO-HO! MERRY CHRISTMAS, CHRIS PILEWSKI!!

presently, Ken Johnson

-- 
Son, all the pretty, intelligent,      || Ken Johnson                           healthy young women are taken.         || A I Applications Institute
It's a basic rule of the universe,     || 80 South Bridge                       and if you don't like it,              || Edinburgh,  Scotland   EH1 1HN
go somewhere else.                     || Phone 031-650 2756   Fax 031-650 6513
               -- my dad  1906-1992    || E-mail ken@aiai.ed.ac.uk                                                     ||                                                                              ||                                                                              || GIZZA JOB
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: ssamaras@scott.skidmore.edu (susan samarasinghe)
Subject: Re: Im Gonna Annoy You :)
Organization: Skidmore College, Saratoga Springs NY
Date: Tue, 15 Dec 1992 02:28:56 GMT




my aren't we clever? i have visions of you staying up late at night,
the tv blaring static, crouched over your computer. the sweat is
pouring off of your bland forehead as you think of new ways to fuck
with my name.......then ,as the idea to call me ssamarasshole occurs
to you, and it is too much for your scrambled neurons to handle!!! YOU
IMPLODE CAUSOING A HUGE VACUUM TO SUCK EVERYTHING IN YOUR LITTLE DEN
TO COME SUCKING INTO THE SORRY RUINS OF YOUR BODY, GURGLING AND PULPY
ON THE FLOOR!!! YOUR LAST THOUGHT IS "GEE.....SURE I AM DEAD NOW, BUT
WOW! I AM SO BLODDY CLEVER! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" 

		it is these thoughts that keep me going when nothing
else does....

					all my love...

						sioux
From: ajd@oit.itd.umich.edu (Arthur Delano)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: michigan
Date: 16 Dec 1992 00:47:11 GMT
Organization: finchhaus
Distribution: world
NNTP-Posting-Host: helen.oit.itd.umich.edu


there is a headline in today's ann arbor news
which reads: "Man on tether escapes".

on first thought, i thought it meant what i know
most of you hoped it meant.

but it doesn't.

AjD
perhaps one day
it might.
-- 
                       ajd@oit.itd.umich.edu
    "Whatever makes the most money will happen." -- Eleanor Glyn
From: arnie@red.dwarf.space (Arnold Rimmer)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Caudillomancy
Date: Fri, 11 Dec 1992 15:22:12 GMT
 <1992Dec11.011645.28428@trl.oz.au>
Organization: More like Dis~, really.
X-Newsreader: Arn V1.00 beta rel2

In article <1992Dec11.011645.28428@trl.oz.au>, Jacques Guy writes:

> How do we try it then, pretty please, with paella and gazpacho on top?

ARRGH. Some smeghead mentioned gazpacho, again!

Dac
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: mrx@annexia.esd.sgi.com (cloaking the constant k)
Subject: electricity
Organization: the theory that jack built
Date: Tue, 15 Dec 92 20:26:17 GMT


Ilana Stern writes:

>The vocabulary of electricity isn't quite as erotic as the vocabulary of
>plumbing, but why should it be?  

indeed.

imagine the tracery of wires, a latticework
of filaments hidden behind thin plaster.  
imagine the flux of electromagnetic fields 
expanding, filling the space around you with 
a feverish 60 Hz beat.  your skin tingling, 
the electrons throughout your body shuddering
in their orbitals, swirling to a staccato music
generated by the revolving coils of a distant
turbine, creating a dissonant resonance with 
the chaotic signals that filter from your 
cerebral cortex.


soon, a change: a rebellion of cells deep
within the grey matter, growing, consuming,
pulsing to the new rhythm, amplifying it, 
restructuring it.  an entity born of man and
machine.  it makes its presence known.


		mister x
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: jcarroll@ferris.cray.com (Jeff Carroll)
Subject: Re: Proper pronunciation of 'Kibo' IN BED
Originator: jcarroll@ferris
Organization: Transcontinental Living Room
Date: 15 Dec 92 12:34:16 CST


In article <1992Dec15.162606.22049@spider.co.uk>, andrewc@spider.co.uk (Andrew Cannon) writes:
> In article <BzA7rM.4n4@encore.com> kschnitz@encore.com (Kevin Schnitzius) writes:
> >grendel@csd4.csd.uwm.edu (The Crow of Desperation) writes:
> >>Mark "Ashamed because he could remember Max from 'Hart to Hart's name"
> >>Lippert 
> >
> >The dog's name was "Freeway."
> 
> What ever happened to the dog ? It was the best actor on the show. 
> 
> When I get old I want to be put out to stud.
> 
> 		     Andy
> -- 

I have a twenty-two-year-old female friend in Virginia who, despite
her well-advertised heterosexuality, persists in referring to herself
as a "stud".

Then again, she is pretty short. Sort of a bump on the face of the earth,
if you will. Maybe she is correct in her terminology.

In your case, you'll have to go through puberty first.

jkc (her name is Amy too)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: jfw@jfwhome.FUNHOUSE.COM (John F. Woods)
Subject: Re: alt.queen-mum.buttfuck alt.limey.pindick
Organization: Misanthropes-R-Us
Date: Sat, 12 Dec 1992 19:50:24 GMT

In article <exuptr.278.723769008@exu.ericsson.se> exuptr@exu.ericsson.se (Patrick Taylor) writes:
>>This is probably going to turn into an American version of a "clever"
>>joke so that all the Americans can laugh while the rest of the world
>>look on in pity.
>
>Why manufacture jokes when we can just look at you?
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
> PEROT IN '96!
>  - Patrick Taylor, Ericsson Network Systems

Look, clown.  We already DID self-reference months ago.
From: dmccart@gomez.intel.com (D. J. McCarthy)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Will I go to hell just for thinking this?
Date: 12 Dec 92 03:44:31 GMT
Organization: Intel ASTG, Santa Clara, CA
X-Newsreader: TIN [version 1.1 PL8]

Rob Dobson (rwd4f@poe.acc.Virginia.EDU) wrote:

> Whenever I hear the song Silent Night, the phrase "Holy infant, so tender
> and mild" sounds like a menu item.

	Better to let your mind free-associate with that line than the
first line of "Joy To The World."



--
D. J. McCarthy (dmccart@gomez.intel.com)
And heaven, and heaven and nature sing.
Xref: sparky talk.bizarre:42077 alt.religion.kibology:5421 sci.math:17066
From: bhoughto@sedona.intel.com (Blair P. Houghton)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,alt.religion.kibology,sci.math
Subject: Re: Proper pronunciation of 'Kibo' IN BED
Date: 17 Dec 1992 00:56:40 GMT
Organization: Intel Corp., Chandler, Arizona
NNTP-Posting-Host: stealth.intel.com

In article <cf=bip_00Vp=AOqmc5@andrew.cmu.edu> court+@CMU.EDU (Court Demas) writes:
>> Y'know, the sad part is he probably did the computation
>> to get those digits...he probably wrote a routine to
>> do it for him...he probably wrote it in lisp or BASIC...
>
>NOT!  I  would never be caught dead computing the first 100 digits of pi
>- I have them memorized.  I actually know 200, but only posted to 100 so
>somebody else could join the fun (I'm still waiting).  If you don't know
>at least 70-80 digits of pi then you have a serious problem.

We need a new number.  Call it the plonkelplex.  The
plonkelplex is the number of <*plonk*>s needed to implement
the proper response to anything this person posts on the
subject of knowing more than the requisite number of digits
of pi to punch into any pocket calculator he's ever owned.
The plonkelplex is given as the numerator of the fraction
which most closely approximates pi at the time the
plonkelplex of <*plonk*>s is to be posted times the number
of terms actually summed to reach that conclusion.  It is
therefore roughly proportional to the ratio of the human
race's technological status and the net intellectual
interestingness of this person.

>courtalingus

Gesundheit.

				--Blair
				  "Good thing we not step in it."
From: rdc30@nmrdc1.nmrdc.nnmc.navy.mil (LCDR Michael E. Dobson)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Is it possible ..
Date: 16 Dec 92 14:19:41 GMT
Organization: Naval Medical Research & Development Command

that something done to you here in talk dot bizarre could affect your whole
site, I mean after the canetoad incident I studied real hard and collected
all the Clues[tm] I could find (some were pounded into my cave-newtish
skull by the Staff of Enlightenment) and then I made a few timid posts and
nothing bad happened so I became bolder and offered rpwhite a job testing
musical condoms before we issue them to the troops going to Somalia and
still no response but it was the weekend and maybe the newsfeeds were just
slow so I made a risque joke about cj's sex toy er Hot Red Motorcycle[tm]
and still nothing and I became really worried and in desperation I posted
to misc.test and, and, nothing! <*sob*> not even a peep out of my mailbox,
oh shit, Oh Shit, OH SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT, the *gigaplonk*, I had received a
*gigaplonk* from a Respected Oldbie and now all outgoing news from my site
was being globaly killfiled; I had never seen a *gigaplonk* in this
newsfroup before and that goes back to before the great "What I have on My
Desktop" series with the strawberry jam and the nipple clamps and the can
of Hersey's Syrup and now am I ever going to get it from my News Admin if
he ever finds out and .....

Wait a minute, I AM the News Admin around here.

Mike "You make one little mistake in the nntpsend script and this happens"  
Dobson
From: al037@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (Dave Polewka)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Hmmm....
Date: 20 Dec 1992 05:21:48 GMT
Organization: Case Western Reserve University, Cleveland, OH (USA)
Reply-To: al037@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (Dave Polewka)
NNTP-Posting-Host: slc10.ins.cwru.edu


In a previous article, kludge@grissom.larc.nasa.gov (Scott Dorsey) says:
                       ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
>>I just use one of those small pocket spelling dictionaries.  I wonder
>>what Freud would say.
>
>Freud would probably use a German dictionary.

 kludge@grissom.larc.nasa.gov -- anagram (@=a)
*****************************************
  German dicks, Slav gaols.  O, Ragu!!
*****************************************
-- 
=======================
"Endeavor to persevere"
=======================
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: sabbott@nmsu.edu (SDA)
Subject: Re: I am like mister x in that...
Organization: WHorshipers of Lady LibertY (WHoLLY)
Date: Fri, 18 Dec 1992 00:14:09 GMT



I read this as 'I like the mrx in that...'

as in I like the mrx in you.

--


	\\\\\sean/////
From: mjd@saul.cis.upenn.edu ("[*] Mr. Wow")
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Will I go to hell just for thinking this?
Date: 14 Dec 92 07:43:12 GMT
Organization: Eaters of Wisdom
In-reply-to: rwd4f@poe.acc.Virginia.EDU's message of 11 Dec 92 13:37:13 GMT


Mm, our favorite is always ``Troll the ancient yule-tide carol.''

``Hi!  My name is Troll, and I'm an ancient yule-tide carol!''

Someone please kill me before I spawn.
--

	 The worst thing in the world is when records are destroyed
Mark-Jason Dominus 	  			    mjd@central.cis.upenn.edu 
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: cj@eno.esd.sgi.com (C J Silverio)
Subject: dream analysis
Reply-To: cj@sgi.com (C J Silverio)
Organization: SGI TechPubs
Date: Mon, 14 Dec 92 19:49:09 GMT

---
I dreamed that I was one of Robert Fripp's Crafty Guitarists.  He
liked me.  He practiced sexual perversions on me.  I learned to
play guitar that sounds like hammered dulcimer.

---
c j silverio
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: beb@pt.com (Bruce Buck)
Subject: Re: Hmmm....
Organization: Performance Technologies, Incorporated
Date: Thu, 17 Dec 1992 13:59:55 GMT

In article <1gl5nbINNgr3@usenet.INS.CWRU.Edu> rpwhite@taurus.cs.nps.navy.mil (rpwhite) writes:
>
>Scott Dorsey) ays:
>
>>Freud would probably use a German dictionary.
>>--scott
>
>Hmmm, my ENGLISH-GERMAN, GERMAN-ENGLISH dictionary has no translation
>for gullible.

Freud was Viennese, so you need an Austrian-English, English-Austrian Dictionary
From: grendel@csd4.csd.uwm.edu (The Crow of Desperation)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Food, glorious food
Date: 14 Dec 1992 08:44:10 GMT
Organization: The Church of Pat
NNTP-Posting-Host: 129.89.7.4

In article <1992Dec14.012731.3477@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> pfinerty@nyx.cs.du.edu (fun fun fun boy) writes:
*In article <1ggc9mINN8uo@uwm.edu> grendel@csd4.csd.uwm.edu (The Crow of Desperation) writes:
*>
*>In the paper today, I read yet another criticism about MREs (Meals Ready to
*>Eat, for the acronymally impairred).
*>
*>Now, I've had a few of those (I won't say where I got them from, just in
*>case the Secret Service is still lurking), and I didn't think they were too
*>bad.
*
*the fruit cocktail is not so bad. it's even good dry. 

Yeah, but when it's wet, you can pour it down the sink.


Mark "I read Dave Berry too" Lippert
From: the lost cause
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: T.B Boxed Edition
Date: 11 Dec 1992 20:13:52 GMT
Organization: Computer Science Department at Rose-Hulman
Distribution: world
Reply-To: jdavidso@nextwork.rose-hulman.edu
NNTP-Posting-Host: jd-next.nextwork.rose-hulman.edu
Keywords: angst


In article <1992Dec11.033233.26164@sol.UVic.CA> rigler@dao.nrc.ca (Michael  
Rigler) writes:
$ 
$ 
$                  TALK.BIZARRE, The Board Game !!!
$ 
$  		 (copyright 1992 by Rigler-Labs)
$ 

Yeah, go ahead, jump on that Christmas commercialism bandwagon.

It's bad enough that I now hear all those same old tired Christmas songs  
everywhere I go. Hell, Even K-mart here started up with them before  
Thanksgiving. What passes for "the Valley's home of rock and roll" is even  
playing those insipid rock Christmas songs, and has been since before  
Thanksgiving.

It's bad enough that even the town Scrooge now has a light display to rival the  
New York skyline, and is drawing people from 20 miles away, probably because  
they wonder what that huge fire could possibly be.

It's bad enough that all the departments here at work, and all my friends  
workplaces, have these stupid, artificial Christmas parties, where everyone  
eats and drinks and flirts too much.

It's bad enough that everyone else I know has their tree up and decorated and I  
don't even have a tree yet; but it's OK, I don't want a tree, not even a little  
one (well, maybe a nice-sized "thai" tree). I don't want any lights or  
ornaments for it either (OK, a replacement cylindar for my broken lava lamp  
would be nice). I don't want any spiked eggnog or any other seasonal drinks  
(uh, a bottle of iced Crown Royal would be great). I can also do without any  
Carols (unless she has big hOOters). I especially don't want to hear any of  
that artificial, fake, "feel good" Christmas cheer (OOOHHH yeah, squeal like a  
pig, baby!!). 

But I really lose it when I see T.B, that last great bastion of disrespect for  
everything, that spawning ground for the putrid masses, reduced to blatant  
Christmas commercialism. DO YOU HEAR ME???  I HAVE HAD JUST ABOUT ENOUGH!! NUKE  
THE NORTH POLE!! KILL, KILL SANTA CLAUS!! BURN ALL THOSE TREES!! SHOOT OUT ALL  
THE CHRISTMAS LIGHTS WITH BB GUNS!! SHRED ALL THE MANTELPIECE STOCKINGS!! 
HHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHhahahaha  ha   ha.
*SOB*



Someone pass the Prozac, or even a couple of Valiums. I feel a great need.
--
************************************************************************
 the Lost Cause                       jdavidso@nextwork.rose-hulman.edu
(hardwaire guy extraordinaire)       MACTech,NeXTtech; NeXTmail accepted
                      "Everything is relative."
************************************************************************
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: vail@tegra.com (Johnathan Vail)
Subject: THE WAGES OF STUPIDITY IS AN ADVERTISING CONTRACT
Summary: What kind of a man reads GQ?
Organization: Tegra-Varityper, Inc. Billerica, MA
Date: Fri, 18 Dec 1992 15:04:08 GMT



			    Larry Walters
		       strapped 42 weather bal-
		      loons to an aluminum lawn
		   chair and soared to 16,000 feet
		 before he shot out some of the bal-
		 loons with a BB gun and crashed into
		   a power line.  He was spotted by
		      both TWA and Delta pilots.
		    Larry, appropriately, is wear-
		       ing our moon dial watch.
			  It costs about $50.



	       IT TAKES A LICKING AND KEEPS ON TICKING
From: kludge@grissom.larc.nasa.gov (Scott Dorsey)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: I Sing the Body Smoke!
Date: 20 Dec 92 17:44:26 GMT
Organization: NASA Langley Research Center and Reptile Farm
NNTP-Posting-Host: grissom.larc.nasa.gov

In article <9212200245.24@rmkhome.UUCP> rmk@rmkhome.UUCP (Rick Kelly) writes:
>I think it's time to bring back spark gap transmitters.  Due to the fact
>that my great grandfather was a patent attorney way back when, I have lots
>of vintage how to books on spark gap technology.

No good... too much bandsplatter and you just can't get a clean note.  What
you want is a continuous arc transmitter.  Dunno who patented it, but Federal
Electric made some of the better ones up until about 1915 or so.  With a 
little bit of bandpass filtration it would probably even be legal to use on
the air today.
--scott
   (but whatever you do, don't touch Federal Electric circuit breakers)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: msluyter@ponder.csci.unt.edu (Michael Sluyter)
Subject: Re: Bad News
Organization: University of North Texas
Date: Wed, 16 Dec 1992 15:23:55 GMT

In <1992Dec16.080743.1866@wetware.com> mlegare@wetware.com (Dr. Robert (BoB) Tech) writes:

>If you're reading this right now, you're a God.  
>Right Now.  Officially. 

[etc...]

>Get your submissions in quick.  First come, first
>ascended.  Any discrepancies will be settled by
>the followers - which is usually the case in these
>things anyway.

Ok, can I be The God of Cardboard Tasting Fat-Free Tortilla Chips???
If that one's already taken, I request to be The God of Imitation Dairy
Creamer.


Thanks,
mike
From: an072@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (Richard White)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Theme music.
Date: 18 Dec 1992 17:08:22 GMT
Organization: Case Western Reserve University, Cleveland, OH (USA)
Reply-To: an072@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (Richard White)
NNTP-Posting-Host: hela.ins.cwru.edu


Every true Road Trip[tm] must have a theme song, playing in the
background most of the time, and this one is no exception. I had trouble
selecting one and then I found it.
"The Pink Room" from the "Fire Walk With Me" soundtrack.
One of the best cruising tunes in recent memory.

rp -- wondering if this should be crossposted to alt.slack
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: bur@ultisol.gsfc.nasa.gov (MAC)
Subject: Re: An Honest Question
Followup-To: talk.bizarre,misc.test
Organization: Lead Pipes-R-Us.
Date: Sun, 20 Dec 1992 01:51:25 GMT

In article <1992Dec18.020606.98712@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu> jjh4@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu (JANE HORVATH) writes:
>In article <1992Dec16.170159.78324@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu>, jws5@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu (J
>USTIN WINSLOW SOLONYNKA) writes:
>>In article <1992Dec16.063607.41113@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu>, mlsa@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu
>>(MICHAEL LAUREN SHERMAN) writes:
>>>Just because I chew tobacco, keep an american flag in my room (because my
>>>confederate one is at home), have a gun rack on my BMW (which I lovingly call
>>>the general lee) drink JD and SoCo out of the bottle, wear flannel shirts and
>>>say y'all does that make it OK for people to stereotype me as a hick?  I don't
>>>think so, do you?
>>
>>No, but I think you'd do very well on "The Dukes of Hazzard".
>>
>>sol  |  Jesus was a carpenter, and damned if that's not bizarre
>>--
>>
>them duke boys would spit on you for calling a bmw 'general lee'
>the original car was a dodge challenger, an american car worthy of such a
>title. you are no hick.
>
>
>-jane
>
>
>-- 



WHY-O-FUCKING-WHY DO TWITS FROM LEHIGH SPEW SO MUCH SHIT INTO THIS 'FROUP?
LOOK AT THE THREE OF YOU, COULDN'T YOU THREE HAVE HAD THIS CONVERSATION
OVER SOME MILK AND COOKIES IN A DORM ROOM AND LEFT THE REST OF THE FUCKING
WORLD ALONE?

THE NEXT TIME YOU THINK OF POSTING TO THIS GROUP, I WANT YOU THREE TO GET
TOGETHER AND POST AS ONE.  NOW, BEFORE YOU CAN POST, THIS IS WHAT YOU HAVE
TO DO.  IN FRONT OF THE TERMINAL, MICHAEL, YOU GET ON ALL FOURS LIKE A DOG.
JUSTIN YOU GET BEHIND HIM AND START FUCKING HIM IN THE ASS.  MAKE SURE YA
DO FAST AND HARD, SO YOU GET A NICE STREAM OF BLOOD GOING DOWN HIS THIGH. 
JANE, YOU LIE DOWN IN FRONT OF FRICK AND FRACK AND THEY WILL BEAT YOU WITH
LEAD PIPES UNTIL BLOOD STARTS COMING OUT OF YOUR EARS.  DON'T WORRY, AFTER THE
FIRST FEW WHACKS, IT WONT HURT A BIT.  NOW, AFTER JANE LOOKS A RED,
PULPY MESS ON THE FLOOR, YOU TWO GUYS GO AT IT UNTIL ONLY ONE IS STANDING.
THAT PERSON WILL THEN POST A GIF OF THE WHOLE BLOODY MESS TO T.B

NOW, YOU THREE RUN ALONG AND REST.
From: mjd@saul.cis.upenn.edu (Mark-Jason Dominus)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: quick philosophy (press 'n' now)
Date: 12 Dec 92 20:32:18 GMT
Organization: University of Pennsylvania
In-reply-to: elvis@netcom.com's message of 11 Dec 92 13:05:39 GMT

In article <1992Dec11.130539.13367@netcom.com> elvis@netcom.com ('kEvin') writes:
   now I only hope to learn why
   Arlene S. Rapkin's roommate
   needed the lard before I die.

Who, Signe Redfeld?  I can tell you, but you'll have to pay, pay, pay.
--

	 The worst thing in the world is when records are destroyed
Mark-Jason Dominus 	  			    mjd@central.cis.upenn.edu