HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: zcjm0f@wwnv42.uucp (CJohn Mace)
Subject: Re: Schedule determines #1
Keywords: nn
Organization: Amoco Production
Distribution: na
Date: Thu, 13 Aug 1992 13:42:06 GMT

>>This needs to be cleared up, as does the problem of having no provision
>>for the SEC, Big Eight, or SWC champs to play one another should the
>>need arise.
>
>The SWC (and Cotton, since the SWC runs the Cotton) offered to have the
>SWC champ play in one of the other bowls if they were number 2 and it 
>would make a 1-2 game.  The other bowls/conferences quickly axed that
>measure as they didn't want to recipricate.
>
>- goober (hops, yeast, barley, malt) smith

I believe the failure of reciprocation caused the SWC to back down from
its offer.  :-(

cmuck
From: fierro@uts.amdahl.com (Doug Fierro)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: Re: CNN/USA Today Preseason Top 25
Date: 17 Aug 92 23:41:32 GMT
Organization: Amdahl Corporation, Sunnyvale CA

In article <1992Aug17.040730.29852@beaver.cs.washington.edu> rcsaito@cs.washington.edu (Richard Saito) writes:
>
> 1. Miami (40)			13. Clemson
> 2. Washington (14)		14. Colorado
> 3. Notre Dame (3)		15. Iowa
> 4. Florida St.			16. Georgia
> 5. Michigan			17. UCLA
> 6. Florida (1)			18. Ohio St.
> 7. Texas A&M			19. Tennessee
> 8. Penn St. (2)		20. Stanford
> 9. Alabama			21. BYU
>10. Syracuse			22. California
>11. Nebraska			23. Georgia Tech
>12. Oklahoma			24. Texas
>				25. Southern Cal
>
>
>
>-- 
>-Richard


  I can't believe that California is not even in the pre-season top20
after finishing in the top 10 after the bowls were played (beating the
shit out of Clemson) AND has a returning player who's a serious Heisman
trophy candidate.  But I can't say I'm all that surprised either.

  Doug
-- 
                                                     Doug Fierro
                                      |\             UTS System Software
  O                         __________|_\______      CASE tools development
  \_.______________________| * * * * * * * * */      fierro@uts.amdahl.com
 __\____                   |=================/       (408)746-7102
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
From: sjc@cs.purdue.EDU (Steve Chapin)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: Re: The Wack attack
Date: 13 Aug 92 17:09:43 GMT
Organization: Department of Computer Science, Purdue University

}} In article <16e492INN2l7@early-bird.think.com> krall@Think.COM (Tom Krall) writes:
}} 
}} (What ? No Northwestern this year ? Oh well, at least we're
}} still playing Purdue ;^) )

Oh, you keep those insults up, and you'll see.  We'll, we'll...we'll
score on you!  Yeah, we won't let you shut us out like we will the
rest of the Big-10. 

sjc@cs.purdue.edu               Steve Chapin           Today's Grammar Lesson:
   Brake your bike before the wall, or you'll break your bike upon the wall!

                      Beef:  Real food for a dead planet.
From: rszczerb@twain.helios.nd.edu (Robert Szczerba)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: Re: Top 10 HB in '93 draft
Date: 20 Aug 92 01:11:09 GMT
Organization: University of Notre Dame, Notre Dame

In article <1992Aug19.150054.5058@makesys.com> john@makesys.com (John Turman) writes:
>In article <65723@hydra.gatech.EDU> mm42@prism.gatech.EDU (Mark Mitchell) writes:
>Dream on Mark, the first time Bettis runs into the man mountain Ceaser O'Neal 6-8 380 lbs. 5.4/40
>ands gets KRUSHED he'll not be a factor as the Canes go on to romp ND on NYD at the Fiesta
>bowl for the MNC. Now where's my Alpha bits....
>
>John T.
>-- 

Sorry to disappoint you John, but O'Neal's got to catch him before
he can CRUSH him ... and I don't think that's gonna happen.


Prediction

Fiesta Bowl 1993

ND - 35
Miami - 31

 
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
From: Sid Kitchel <kitchel@moose.cs.indiana.edu>
Subject: Re: Who do you think will win it all??
Organization: Computer Science, Indiana University
Distribution: usa
Date: Tue, 18 Aug 1992 09:25:31 -0500

jordan@inland.com writes:

|>In article <1992Aug10.171636.19210@spdc.ti.com>, dostalik@epcot.spdc.ti.com (Bill Dostalik) writes:
|>> In article <1992Aug10.152907.9116@cs.ucla.edu> reiher@ficus.cs.ucla.edu (Peter Reiher) writes:
|>>>In article <1992Aug9.221452.11930@spdc.ti.com> dostalik@epcot.spdc.ti.com (Bil
|>> 
|>> Question:  when did OU and ND last play?  I know ND was our main nemesis in 
|>> the 50's to winning even more MNC's, (as Miami was in the 80's).  I, for one,
|>> would like to see that rivalry revived.
|>> 
|>> - Bill Dostalik
|>My recollection is that in their last meeting was 1966, with ND winning
|>something like 35-0.  That year was Ara's first MNC year, you know, the one
|>where he played for the tie?

	...and he got it too. Good work, Ara!!! 
	   Kill, Bubba, kill!!!!!!! Oh, well, tough luck Spartans.

To set the record straight (and for the second time), OU and ND last
met in 1968 at South Bend. The 1966 game was in Norman and the final
score was ND 38, Sooners 0 and the Fighting Frenchman did
intentionally injure Granville Liggons, OU's outstanding nose guard. 

							soONEr born!!!,
							      --Sid


-- 
Sid Kitchel...............WARNING: allergic to smileys and hearts....
Computer Science Dept.                         kitchel@cs.indiana.edu
Indiana University                              kitchel@iubacs.BITNET
Bloomington, Indiana  47405-4101........................(812)334-8100
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
From: HADCRJAM@admin.uh.edu (MILLER, JIMMY A.)
Subject: Re: What in the heck is a 'T-SIP' ??
Organization: University of Houston Administrative Computing
Date: Fri, 14 Aug 1992 12:34:10 GMT
X-News-Reader: VMS NEWS 1.20

In <1992Aug11.224857.27081@awdprime.austin.ibm.com> marc@yogi.austin.ibm.com writes:

> If not allowing women in the university is your idea of high-culture, fine.

  Check the smiley's dude.

> The culture/atmosphere/tradition at A&M is not for everyone.  It has nothing
> to do with jealousy.  If you believe that it does, then you're brainwashed.
> A&M isn't exactly a haven for individual expression - just try to sit down 
> during the next football game, or to not bend over during a yell.  

  If you sit down during an Aggie football game, you're not going to get to see
anything besides the back of the person in front of you, anyway.

semper fi,

Jammer Jim Miller 
Texas A&M University '89 and '91
* Aggie in Cougarland -- I just work here.				       *
* Speak for my employers?  They don't even know I exist!		       *
*"Become one with the Student Billing System. *BE* the Student Billing System."*
* "Power finds its way to those who take a stand.  Stand up, Ordinary Man."    *
*      ---Rik Emmet, Gil Moore, Mark Levine: Triumph 		               *
From: hjjcl@usho77.hou281.chevron.com (J.J.Clyde)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: Re: The Wack attack
Date: 14 Aug 92 17:45:14 GMT
Organization: Chevron


train09@meaddata.com (Training ID9) writes:
                      ^^^^^^^^^^^^
                      ^^^^^^^^^^^^
>In a previous message it was written that
>
>>Now that Minnesota has new coach Jim Wacker promising
>>to "air" it out in the Metrodome, Golden Gopher fans
>>(both of us ;^) ) are excited about their chances this year.
>>Here is a biased pre-season prediction.
>>(What ? No Northwestern this year ? Oh well, at least we're
>>still playing Purdue ;^) )
>>
>>
>>   9/26   Pittsburgh     (away game)
>>Close loss last year, will win this year.
>
>Pitt will beat Minnesota by two touchdowns.  They might have stood a 
>chance if the game was at Minnesota, but it isn't and they don't.  GO PITT! 


OK.  Two unwritten rules of woofing/predicting:
**********************************************

1)  You hereby grant permission to the esteemed Brian Saunders to archive 
your woof/prediction until a time deemed necessary to exposed your wit 
(or lack thereof, upon, wherewith, wherewithall, wherewasI?. . ..)

Oh, Yes!
2)  You MUST own up to your woof/prediction BEFORE the fact (meaning, AT
THE TIME YOU STATE IT).    


Thus, "Joe Training_ID9" from Mead Data just don't cut it!


Example (for further clarification):

	LSU WILL ROMP THRU THE SEC-WEST LIKE A .22 THRU AN ARMADILLO
	(you can borrow my .22 to test this theory!), KILL FLORIDA BY
	47 POINTS IN B'HAM, AND BLAST NOTRE DAME ON NEW YEAR'S DAY.

(note "own up" line at right=>)	    -- James (this is really just some 
				tiding-me-over-til-I-can-do-some-legit-
				baseball-woofing-oh-no-I'm-starting-to-
				sound-like-a-goober) Clyde
	

-- 
*************************************************************************
GEAUX TIGERS!!!!!!!!      | "That haircut of yours might be city-style,
GEAUX SAINTS!!!!!!!!      |  but your heart is shaped like a bowl."
James Clyde     LSU '91   |             -- Briscoe Darlin, T.A.G.S.
From: stricher@masig.fsu.edu (Char Aznabul)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: Re: aTm over Stanford, ?, !!!!
Date: 14 Aug 92 21:34:03 GMT
Followup-To: rec.sport.football.college
Organization: Murasami Labs

In article <l8nt8uINNa2l@male.EBay.Sun.COM>, rossm@orcrist.EBay.Sun.COM
(Ross McCammon) wrote:

> I predict that the Aggies will spend the whole game bumping into each other
> trying to figure out where Stanford's receivers are coming from. Anyone who
> saw the Okies play the Elway teams will know what I'm talking about.

No, actually, it'll be the Cardinal QB, laying on his back, seeing stars,
and wondering where the A&M rush is coming from, and why his offensive 
line is suddenly quite porous.

And if he sees Mickey, then it's time to sit him on the bench.

James
From: mm42@prism.gatech.EDU (Mark Mitchell)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: Re: Schedule determines #1
Keywords: n
Date: 13 Aug 92 14:05:01 GMT
Distribution: na
Organization: Ramblin' Wrecks from Georgia Tech

garys@cs.tamu.edu (Gary Wayne 'Goober' Smith) wrote:
}
}The SWC (and Cotton, since the SWC runs the Cotton) offered to have the
}SWC champ play in one of the other bowls if they were number 2 and it 
}would make a 1-2 game.  The other bowls/conferences quickly axed that
}measure as they didn't want to recipricate.

Well, heck, after the writeups you Steers and Aggies have given the
Cotton Bowl lately, can you blame them?  All I ever hear about that
game is how miserable the weather is.(*)  Who wants to give up a trip
to Miami or New Orleans for that?

(*) Okay, this is not entirely true - I also hear about how Texas A&M
    decimates Heisman trophy winners there (and everywhere).  BTW, can
    one of you Aggies tell us real quick how Heisman trophy winner
    Earl Campbell did against A&M?  Thanks in advance.

-- 
Mark Mitchell           Georgia Tech            mm42@prism.gatech.edu
        "... and we tell ourselves that what we found 
                   was what we meant to find."
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
From: rjones@z.eecs.umich.edu (Randolph M. Jones)
Subject: Re: Michigan State 1993 schedule
Organization: University of Michigan EECS Dept., Ann Arbor
Distribution: usa
Date: Sat, 22 Aug 1992 22:56:36 GMT

In article <1992Aug22.213223.16539@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu> lhominga@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu (Louis J Hominga) writes:
> does anyone know why Michigan State is Scheduled to Play Wisconsin on December
>5, 1993 in TOKYO, JAPAN?
>
>Who thought this one up?

I expect this is the "Mirage Bowl", which is played every year to advertise
the Mitsubishi Mirage.  The usual formula is to pick two teams from the
same conference who were going to play each other anyway, and pay them to
play in Tokyo instead.  I believe the first one was around 1978 or 1979.
From: rszczerb@dante.helios.nd.edu (Robert Szczerba)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: Re: Who do you think will win
Date: 18 Aug 92 20:56:52 GMT
Organization: University of Notre Dame, Notre Dame

In article <Bt6ww0.AM3@encore.com> jfawcett@encore.com (Jason Fawcett) writes:
>
>Jimmy Johnson was ask this year how his last Hurricane team would have
>done in the NFL.  Jimmy said that his last Miami team could not only
>have beat the slowpolks cowboy (1-15) team he got his first year in
>Dallas, but he would have run the score up on them with Miami.  JJ 
>said on the Dallas astoturf speed is needed to play a fast team. How
>can you hit what you can't catch.   JJ said his first Cowboy team could
>not even catch the Cane's linemen running up field.
>

Sorry bud, this just re-enforces my belief the good old Jimmy
Johnson has as much brains as Tom Landry has hair.  Even the
weakest NFL team would still win hands down over any college team
... even the mighty Hurricanes.

Heck, Miami couldn't even beat ND, how can they expect to play
the pros.

	rob
From: al.sorhaindo@brent.uucp (Al Sorhaindo) 
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: Who voted Miami #3?
Date: 16 Aug 92 11:14:00 GMT
Distribution: world
Organization: The Brentwood BBS Harrison, NY  914-835-7898
Reply-To: al.sorhaindo@brent.uucp (Al Sorhaindo) 

Were any logical guesses made here on who voted Miami #3 in
last season's final coach's poll?


I believe it was then California coach Bruce Snyder.


The circumstantial evidence;

Bruce carried a grudge from the 1989, and 1990 beatings his team
received from Miami. The 1990 game was especially noteworthy because
of Miami's showboating and taunting, in which the Hurricanes even
surpassed their own reputation for trash. (Probably because they
were coming off that loss to BYU. Erickson was to say to his players
after the game, "Act like you've been there (the endzone) before.")

Snyder wanted to boost a fellow Pac-10 team, Washington.

Helping Washington achieve #1 could allow Snyder to say that his
school gave the #1 team their toughest game.

He needed the #2 slot in the poll for his own team, California.

In the post game press conference after the 1990 Miami at Cal game,
a reporter who was very impressed with Miami gushed to Bruce,
"How good is Miami?", Snyder responded, "There are at least four teams
in the Pac-10 better than Miami." The stunned pressroom gave Snyder
a chance to backoff that statement, but he was adamant, Miami was inferior
to at least four Pac-10 schools. Anyone as irrational as that is definately
capable of voting Miami #3 in last seasons final poll.


                                                 Al

al.sorhaindo@execnet.com
---
 . DeLuxe. 1.21 #11688 . al.sorhaindo@execnet.com
From: delarocq@eos.ncsu.edu (DERRELL EMERY LAROCQUE)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: NCSU and the Kickoff Classic- Response
Date: 19 Aug 92 19:51:07 GMT
Reply-To: delarocq@eos.ncsu.edu (DERRELL EMERY LAROCQUE)
Organization: North Carolina State University, Project Eos
Originator: delarocq@c00075-100lez.eos.ncsu.edu




  1. I had no idea that there was another August game, I didn't see it in
     the football magazine I read.

  2. I suppose you can call NCSU overrated, and still expect people to
     believe that Georgia Tech is 23rd? Ha! 

  3. I didn't state that NCSU would upset Florida State outright, but I
     did set a few conditions that I think would give NCSU football fans
     a pretty good preview of what is to come.

 
 delarocq@eos.ncsu.edu
-- 
delarocq@eos.ncsu.edu


      
---------------------------------------------------------------------------   
   BBB   U  U  FFFF  FFFF  AAA   L   OOO     BBB    I  L     L   SSS     !
  B   B U  U  F     F     A  A  L   O   O   B   B  I  L     L   S   S   !
 BBBBB U  U  FFFF  FFFF  AAAA  L   O   O   BBBBB  I  L     L     SS    !
B   B U  U  F     F     A  A  L   O   O   B   B  I  L     L    S   S  
 BBB   UU  F     F     A  A  LLLL  OOO     BBB  I  LLLL  LLLL   SSS  !

Raiders Fans: Prepare to Lose!

Reporter: "Who do you think is the best running back in the NFL?"
Thurman Thomas: "The running back that went to Oklahoma State".
From: copus@pa621a.inland.com
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: Re: Buckeye News
Date: 20 Aug 92 17:27:54 GMT
Distribution: usa
Organization: Inland Steel Company, East Chicago, IN

In article <1992Aug18.173849.17996@cbnews.cb.att.com>, ddn@cbnews.cb.att.com (david.d.nason) writes:
> Joe Metzger, projected starting TE for the Buckeyes, went down yesterday
> with a broken leg after turning to catch a pass (no contact injury).
> He underwent surgery and will reportedly be back in the Syracuse/Wisconsin
> timeframe.  That leaves the TE duty to Cedric Saunders and two 1st year
> freshman.

Thanks for the info.  I was beginning to think that our feed was
down.

I heard yesterday from a friend of mine who lives in Columbus that
the freshman running back from Massillon, Travis McGuire, was moved
to defensive back.  As one might expect we reportedly is not happy
about that.  Do you know anything about that move?

I also heard that the Cleveland Plain Dealer is reporting that the
starting QB for the Louisville game will be Herbstreit.  Stablein was
reported as saying that Herbstreit threw every day during the summer
and is throwing the ball as well as any quarterback in the country and
therefore should be the starter.  I also understand that Stablein and
Herbstreit are close friends and unless Kirk has improved a lot 
by hard work during the off season I can imagine him throwing that
well.
 
> On another note, it was reported that Bo Schembechler will be doing the
> play-by-play along with somebody else (Dan Dierdorf?) for the OSU-Bowling Green
> game.  I pray to the gods that my tickets come through so I won't have to
> listen to that.
>

Bo and Dan doing the game?  Ouch.  Personally, I like Dierdorf except
when he starts spewing Michigan crap.  He did the Bears game last week
and believe it or not only had good things to say about Spellman's
performance.  That surprised me I expected the opposite. 


Later,

Len

-- 
--------------------------------------------------------
| L.W. Copus II             | Its hard to get rid of   |
| copus@pa621a.inland.com   | the smell after you've   |
| Inland Steel Company      | gone to bed with a       |
| East Chicago, Indiana     | skunk - Lou Pinella      |
--------------------------------------------------------
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
From: serdar@fawlty8.eng.monash.edu.au (Serdar Boztas)
Subject: Re: Trojan News Vol#1
Organization: Monash University, Melb., Australia.
Date: Mon, 17 Aug 1992 04:00:09 GMT

rszczerb@bronte.helios.nd.edu (Robert Szczerba) writes:

>>   USC FOOTBALL GOALS - 1992

>>1. Play each game showing class and sportsmanship
>>2. Earn A USC Degree
>>3. Beat UCLA and Notre Dame
>>4. Go To The Rose Bowl
>>5. Win A National Championship

>I think you've got a chance at 3 out of the 5.
>Any bets as to which two ain't gonna happen?  :)

I think 1 and 2 are questionable at this point! :-)

Serdar

>		- Rob
-- 
Inhabited by absurd fears,  they only discuss  the puerilities with which 
every fool is familiar, and dare not, by turning a bold hand to the human 
heart, offer its gigantic idiosyncrasies to our views.     Sade, 'Justine'
Serdar Boztas \\ serdar@fawlty1.eng.monash.edu.au \\ +(61)3-565-5722
From: dianem@boi.hp.com (Diane Mathews)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: Re: Bowl Records
Date: 20 Aug 92 20:46:51 GMT
Distribution: usa
Organization: Hewlett-Packard, Santa Clara Division

>What I did for that last list is multiply wins by %, so I guess that
>gives you sort of a measure of who's most likely to win bowl games
>throughout the history of college football or something like that.
>I dunno.

>Anyway, enjoy.            

Hey, thanks for all you did for this post.  It was interesting to see
teams like Oklahoma State and Kansas above my favorite team.  Gives a
little historical perspective.
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
From: todd@numep2.phys.nwu.edu (NUMEP)
Subject: Re: Schedule determines #1
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41    
Organization: Northwestern University
Date: Thu, 13 Aug 1992 07:54:00 GMT

In article <1992Aug11.143529.27749@afit.af.mil>, jswitzer@afit.af.mil (Chip Switzer) writes...
>tamu@uxh.cso.uiuc.edu (Todd Henderson) writes:
> 
> 
>>What about the bowl game.  If washington and A&M go thru a soft schedule
>>undefeated, but then play a team with a 'tough' schedule like Miami/FSU?/...
>>and beat them, I think they have proven themselves.  Who did BYU play the
>>year they won the MNC in the bowl game?  Did they have a chance to prove
>>themselves there?
> 
>That one is a pretty sore subject with UW fans.  BYU beat a pretty weak
>Michigan team in the Holiday Bowl that year (84?).  BYU won the MNC
>simply because they were undefeated--no attention was given to their
>relatively weak schedule.  Washington thumped Oklahoma (who was no. 1 or
>2 at the time) in the Orange bowl and finished no. 2.
> 
> 
>Chip Switzer                            "A witty saying proves nothing." 
>jswitzer@afit.af.mil                              -- Voltaire 

Yeah, and I'm still smartin' from that one... :(  What a crock!

tkp
.... but wasn't last year sweet?

______________________________________________________________________________
Todd K. Pedlar                !
Graduate Student              !   ...said one termite to the other at Smokey's
Department of Physics         !   Bar & Grill, " Is the bartender here? "    
Northwestern University       ! 
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: gsprow@lordvader.nswc.navy.mil (Gregg Sprow)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: When is the KICKOFF CLASSIC?
Date: 21 Aug 92 13:12:32 GMT
Organization: Naval Surface Warfare Center


  Excuse me for being out of it, but what day, time and network is
the KICKOFF CLASSIC?  Thanks in advance.

 Gregg Sprow
 NSWCDD
 gsprow@relay.nswc.navy.mil
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Organization: Penn State University
Date: Thu, 20 Aug 1992 14:08:17 EDT
From: <JCT3@psuvm.psu.edu>
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: Re: Auburn News
 <1992Aug20.153534.7773@usho93.hou281.chevron.com>

In article <1992Aug20.153534.7773@usho93.hou281.chevron.com>,
hjjcl@usho77.hou281.chevron.com (J.J.Clyde) says:
>
>
>What?  No word on MEGA-recruit Steve Davis out of Spartanburg, SC?
>RB, 6-2, 217lbs, runs a 4.45?
>
>THIS guy is 'highly regarded' -- right?
>

Davis has become a Prop 48 casualty, not scoring high enough on the SAT.
And so it goes . . .

Jim Thomas
Penn State
From: garys@cs.tamu.edu (Gary Wayne 'Goober' Smith)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.football.college
Subject: Re: Fair Weather Fans
Date: 20 Aug 92 14:12:33 GMT
Article-I.D.: tamsun.1992Aug20.141233.19477
Organization: Computer Science Department, Texas A&M University


Dear Mr. Valdas Whathisname,

   It has come to my attention that some goober-wanna-bes have recently
expressed an interests in recruiting you for their school.  Accept no 
substitutes...these upstart schools may indeed put on a good show with their 
eloquant language and all the geauxing and kneauxing, but the Goober School 
is the one true home for net.goobers.  Look thru their smokescreen.  

Also, it has been suggested that some of these 'other' schools have been
known to made illegal inducements.  Please keep in mind that it is against
NCAng (National Collegiate Associate for net.goobers) regulations to offer
recuits any sort of financial inducements. 

I'm looking forward to our visit.  One more thing...if in some hypothetical
situation you were look outside of you window just after agreeing to attend
the Graduate School of Goober U and you were to see a shiny new Corvette
loaded with $100 bills, what color would you want the car to be?


                                  Goober
                                  Dean and President
                                  Goober School for the Clueless