From: Maarten.van.Loon@cwi.nl (M. van Loon)
Newsgroups: soc.religion.christian
Subject: Some thought about (homo)sexuality from the Netherlands
Date: 31 Jul 92 05:53:38 GMT
Organization: CWI, Amsterdam

Although I didn't read all articles about homosexuality, I feel
it is good to tell you how I think about several issues concerning
the (homo)sexual moral. Some weeks ago, I posted an article about
the sexual moral and the Gospel and I also gave some information
about the "moral (un)health" of the Dutch people. I got some
very encouraging reactions on my posting. That's why I want
to share some thoughts with you again. I think that I look at things
somewhat different than American christians - we live in a somewhat
different culture.

From the articles I read, I got the impression that homosexualty is
still not very much accepted in the USA. Anyway, not as much as in
Europe or The Netherlands. For example, we have the term "homo-marriage".
This doesn't mean that two homosexuals can actually marry like a man and
a woman, but in some cities, two homosexuals who want to "marry" (i.e. live
together, care for each other etc.) can go to the town hall and have
their relationship registrated. However, they don't become the rights
which married people have. If they want to settle things, for example
for the case one of the two dies, they have to go to a notary and make
a so-called "living together contract". This is not something special
for homosexuals - everybody can do this. For example a man and a woman
living together can do this but also two persons without having a 
sexual relationship (e.g. single man and his housekeeper, grandfather and
grandchild etc.).

The fact that people living unmarried together have not the same (legal)
rights as married people is for most people unsatisfactory. Therefore,
a new law is in progress which will settle this in certain cases, for
example the inheritance rights (but paying of taxes as well). I think
it's good that this law is coming. The goverment is not there to
condemn or to approve relationships. It's just to keep law, order and
justice in the country. From my christian point of view, there is also
nothing wrong with this, because other relationships than marriage 
will not get the same status as marriage has.

In the Dutch language we have two words for "homosexual". The first one
is "homosexueel" which means that this person practises homosexuality.
The second one is "homofiel" (fiel is derived from the Greek 'filos' =
friend) which means that this person is attracted to people of the same
sex. I think this is a useful distinction and I will use these two
words in the following.

In my church (A Reformed church) there are - of course - also homofiel
people. They have great difficulty with this and I am very happy that
there is now attention for their situation in church. It has been
(too long) silent in church about this. Now, the christian press writes
about this and there is also a group of people (homofiel-s, their parents,
friends etc.) who come togheter on a regular basis to talk about their
experiences etc. and to listen to the Bible. 

After this somewhat long "introduction", I want to give you all some of
my thoughts.
1. Being homofiel is not a sin. The fact that people are homofiel is
   caused by the sin - the same sin we all have, namely the sin in
   Adam (I feel I have to formulate carefully here, but that's difficult,
   because I am not a native speaker like most of you - so if
   something looks strange, sounds blunt ... please forgive me). We
   have to live with our sins.

2. Homofiel christians have a lot of difficulties. Probably much more
   than we realize. If we don't take good care of them, they may be
   get very disappointed in christians and church and lose contact
   with God. I know that a lot of homofiel people who were raised as
   christians don't believe anymore.
   There is only one way in which they can be helped: showing them
   that they are normal people, just like we all, with the same sins
   and that we all need Jesus Christ as our Saviour. Maybe this is
   quite logic, but I remember a posting of a lesbygay person from
   which I got the impression that there is often a lack of real
   christian love. Anyway, I think that we often don't love each
   other enough - not only when we are dealing with difficult
   situations. However, Christ has shown us infinitely great love.
   Everyone should realize that - homofiel or not - this love
   is also for him/her, in spite of the fact that we fall in sinn
   every day again. Well, if Christ showed us so much love,
   shouldn't we show each other as much christian love as we can?

3. There are other sins than homosexualtity which are much more
   severe. In fact, I think it can't be expected from people who
   don't believe that they behave according to the Bible. Therefore,
   Christians shouldn't start condemning a specific sinn, but they
   should start with showing people the love a Christ and telling
   them the wonderful news, the Gospel. Only people who are
   coming to faith can be convinced of their sins and the necessity
   of living according to the Scripture.

Maarten van Loon