HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: trumpins@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu (Barbara Trumpinski)
Subject: Re: To new beginnings
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana
Date: Thu, 31 Dec 1992 04:13:56 GMT




>       John steps out of the hole he dug himself into with his writing.  He's
>looking pretty shaky and teary eyed, as he walks up to the bar and lays a
>dollar on top.

>     "Sam adams."  He says.  Mike smiles and takes his dollar, sliding the open
>bottle across the bar; he'd had one ready.  John smiles and steps up to the
>line.

>        "Sometimes endings are really beginnings.

>        "Then he turned around again, and Jake was gone.
>        "In his place was the beginnings of a sunrise.  The darkness before the
>dawn was over; it was the start of a new day.
>        "Raphael smiled and walked back into the house with Christine.  Jake
>always did have a great sense of timing.

>       "The End. . . or a new beginning."

>              The bottle crashes into the fireplace.

>                                             John/The Crazyman
>"Yep. . . the rough draft is finished." 


kitten turns back into her normal self just long enough to bounce
right over to john and give him a huge hug and kiss...

"BRAVO!!!!! i am soooooooooooooo proud of you."  she chugs her
champagne and flings the glass into the fireplace..."to dearest
john...and beginnings...."


--
***************************************************************************
conan the librarian a.k.a. kitten           /\ /\  barbara ann 
"my life's a soap opera, isn't yours?"      {=.=}
                                              ~   trumpins@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu 
"love is the wild card of existance"
                          rita mae brown
From: narxtc@navier.math.uh.edu (Noah Ramon)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: DIDI
Date: 3 Jan 1993 18:27:58 GMT
Organization: UH Dept of Math
NNTP-Posting-Host: navier.math.uh.edu

In article <C08x5C.KrI@news.cso.uiuc.edu> trumpins@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu (Barbara Trumpinski) writes:

[Bad portents, and light omitted for bandwidth only]

WHEW!

Just what you said about miracles earlier : believe, and they come. Thank you!




--
*******************************************************************           
* Noah Ramon - The Bi-Bulb     * Your only limitation is your own *
* Mail to : narxtc@math.uh.edu * imagination - Beans Barton       *
*******************************************************************
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: trumpins@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu (Barbara Trumpinski)
Subject: Re: DIDI
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana
Date: Sat, 2 Jan 1993 21:31:59 GMT



>kitten has a message...

>mellie sent a note and said didi is in ICU in a paris hospital ... she
>had some sort of seizure...heart, they think.

>pass the word...and PRAY....


kitten heaves a sigh of relief....

"we aren't out of the woods yet....but mellie just sent this...


.....

didi's auntie says:
Good Evening, Everyone,

As Mellie has told some of you already, Max and I had to rush Didi
to hospital this morning.  She had a seizure.  We thought at first
it was a heart attack.

After some blood tests it was decided that Didi had probably made a
mistake in her medication routine.  She had too much of one chemical
in her blood and too little of another.  And her 'seizure' was her
body's way of telling her that things were mixed up.  

We are now heaving huge sighs of relief.  The doctors are adjusting
her blood chemistry and she should be back with us tomorrow.  This
may however delay her trip to Geneva.  Or, even, cancel it altogether.
That decision will be taken later.

Mellie, dear, please take over!  I am going to soak in a hot tub and
go to bed early.

Love to you all.

Auntie


You Got it, Auntie!

Mellie here.  Well, you heard it!  Didi is going to be alright!  
Whew!

I am going to go and have a huge bowl of vanilla ice cream loaded
down with chocolate sauce and nuts and a maraschino cherry.  That's
the only way I know of dealing with all this stress!  Oh.  Whipped
cream.  Mustn't forget that!

Happy New Year everyone!

Albert.  Please call Craig and let him know.

Ciao for now

Mellie



--
***************************************************************************
conan the librarian a.k.a. kitten           /\ /\  barbara ann 
"my life's a soap opera, isn't yours?"      {=.=}
                                              ~   trumpins@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu 
"love is the wild card of existance"
                          rita mae brown
From: mtemplar@redunser.demon.co.uk (Alan Ralph)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Impressive knitting
Date: 3 Jan 93 00:52:05 GMT
Reply-To: mtemplar@redunser.demon.co.uk
Organization: Chez MonTemplar, Redunser
X-Mailer: cppnews $Revision: 1.20 $

In article <memo.836941@cix.compulink.co.uk> cliveg@cix.compulink.co.uk writes:
>In-Reply-To: <C07pzv.IA4@agora.rain.com> feath@agora.rain.com (Feather)
>TITLE: Re: Impressive knitting
>
>> "Aren't you guys getting a bit knit-picky?"
>
>Knot at all!

Oh god, these puns have got me in cross-stitches! I'd better lie down and rest
or I might unravel! :-)
--
+---------------------------------------------------------------------------+
| Alan Ralph, 98 Gammons Lane, Watford, Herts. WD2 5HY   Tel. (0923) 230097 |
| Internet: mtemplar@redunser.demon.co.uk    CIX: aralph   CI$: 100025,1551 |
|  Alias: Kimberley MonTemplar Esq., sometime regular in alt.callahans :-)  |
+---------------------------------------------------------------------------+
| Brought to you c/o Demon Internet Services - FULL access to the Internet  |
| for just UKP 10 + VAT a month. Email internet@demon.co.uk for more info.  |
+---------------------------------------------------------------------------+
| *********** My .sig , my site, my opinions. So now you know. ************ |
+---------------------------------------------------------------------------+
From: maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk (Mary Branscombe)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Definition of "monogamy"?
Date: 30 Dec 92 19:05:00 GMT
Reply-To: maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk


"Hello Tanais - welcome to the Place." 
Mary waves a MerryTail at Tanais (and in RL makes a mental note to 
lend him some more Spider Robinson books ;-))
"I still have all the bows and paint from Christmas and I haven't 
finished getting the mistletoe off of my Tail. Would you like a tail 
bow for the New Year Pizza Party?"

Mary MerryTail
+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+
| Ommmmmm, said the lift                    |maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk |
| Organisation: Me? You're joking, right?   |maryb@cix.compulink.uucp  |
|I know I type "teh" for "the" My fingers have their own accent ;-)    |
+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: trumpins@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu (Barbara Trumpinski)
Subject: Re: January birthdays
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana
Date: Tue, 29 Dec 1992 04:14:15 GMT



>Klunkklank

>Nick takes time out from his search ("Stan, where are you?") to do the
>honors:

>"Birthdays for the new year."




>Michael Pereckas        msp333277@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu              Jan  19, 1972
>                        vanilla tea with vanilla sugar          ^^^^
                                                                 FEB. 19

--
***************************************************************************
conan the librarian a.k.a. kitten           /\ /\  barbara ann 
"my life's a soap opera, isn't yours?"      {=.=}
                                              ~   trumpins@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu 
"love is the wild card of existance"
                          rita mae brown
From: dbriggs@zia.aoc.nrao.edu (Daniel Briggs)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Hi Alfvaen
Date: 31 Dec 92 19:33:32 GMT
Organization: National Radio Astronomy Observatory, Socorro NM

In article <OLSON.92Dec31083948@husc8.harvard.edu>
  olson@husc8.harvard.edu (Chip Olson@somewhere.out.there) writes:

>Castellan shudders.  "Umm, I sure don't want 110 amps coming out of *my* out-
>lets- maybe you meant 110V?  110A at 110V is, let's see, eek, 12,100 watts!
>*FRAZZZ!*"

"Think of it as ten hair dryers.  (Many of them are 1200 Watts.)  Probably
still enough to trip a breaker, but not quite the sort of thing that melts
wires.  Of course, we don't know what the 12 kW is doing to the load.  I
mean, an Ohm wouldn't be impossible to get with a moist finger stuck into
a light socket, and I sure wouldn't want to do that for any extended period
of time.

-- 
| Daniel Briggs  (dbriggs@nrao.edu)                      |  USPA B-14993
| New Mexico Tech / National Radio Astronomy Observatory |      DoD #387
| P.O. Box O / Socorro, NM 87801   (505) 835-7391        | 
Support the League for Programming Freedom   (info from lpf@uunet.uu.net)
From: trumpins@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu (Barbara Trumpinski)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Sunglasses (was Re: Hats)
Date: 27 Dec 92 16:41:49 GMT
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana

taldin:

>>>But the
>>>reason I started wearing it mainly was because I wear glasses,
>>>and as such, can't wear sunglasses.  (I know prescriptions and
>>>photogreys are available, but they's expensive...) 

aahz:

>>I wear glasses, too, and I use clip-on polarizing sunglasses.  They're
>>pretty cheap ($5-$15, usually), and they *really* reduce the glare.
>>Someday I may get a pair of darker prescription lenses for when it's too
>>bright, but it really ticks me off that I can't get prescription
>>polarizers....

castellan:

>"I am also among the myopic, and I have a pair of prescription sunglasses,
>and they work really well for me.  Dark enough (due to my lens thickness)
>to protect against everything short of staring directly at the sun, and
>they're glass so the UV doesn't get through.  Cheap sunglasses can be worse
>than useless- if they're not UV-protective, they let more UV in than if you
>weren't wearing anything, because your pupils are dilated more.  They did 
>cost a bit, but they were 100% worth it.  Only problem is that switching back
>and forth can sometimes be a pain, but I'm used to that."

kitten:

"well, i have photograys...on orders from my optometrist.  real light
sensitive ... 

that's 4 with glasses...i'll bet there are more."

--
***************************************************************************
conan the librarian a.k.a. kitten           /\ /\  barbara ann 
"my life's a soap opera, isn't yours?"      {=.=}
                                              ~   trumpins@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu 
"love is the wild card of existance"
                          rita mae brown
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk (Mary Branscombe)
Subject: Re: hello
Reply-To: maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk
Date: Tue, 22 Dec 1992 13:46:00 +0000



>         "To life, and the memories that make it last forever."
> 
> Smiling for the first time since entering Callahan's as he raises the
> whiskey to his lips, Dreamweaver drinks deeply of life and hurls the shot
> glass in to the fire.
> 
> 
To the memories - and to making the memories!
<Crash>
Welcome, dreamweaver
I'm wearing the Editorial Macintosh and holding the Editorial 
Umbrella in my tail so I can safely say.... The dreamweaver's next 
drink is on me Mike *grin


+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+
| Organisation: Me? You're joking, right?   |maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk |
|                                           |maryb@cix.compulink.uucp  |
|I know I type "teh" for "the" My fingers have their own accent ;-)    |
+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk (Mary Branscombe)
Subject: Re:  Scientific creationism
Reply-To: maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk
Date: Thu, 24 Dec 1992 14:52:00 +0000


don't forget how *difficult it is to get turned into a fossil, 
specially if there's something around to eat you....
+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+
| Organisation: Me? You're joking, right?   |maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk |
|                                           |maryb@cix.compulink.uucp  |
|I know I type "teh" for "the" My fingers have their own accent ;-)    |
+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+

Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: aaron@atlantis.uucp
Subject: Re: Hullo...
Organization: Atlantis Communications, Edmonton, AB, Canada
X-Newsreader: TIN [version 1.1 PL8]
Date: Thu, 31 Dec 1992 18:44:13 GMT

"Hello, Gazer," Alfvaen says.  Depending on whether or not Gazer is at the
New Years Pizza Party, Alfvaen is or is not dressed in a scanty gossamer outfit
adorned with strategically-placed shells.  "You know, your name sounds vaguely
familiar.  You didn't happen to be a resident of HoloMUCK, did you?  I spent
some time on there, but I don't have direct Internet access anymore, so I can't
telnet, and thus can't Muck...ah, well.  I'll buy you a drink.  Wench, bring
Gazer a drink."  kitten hastens to comply.

-- 
---Alfvaen(Still looking for "October's Baby")
"Give me your mirth.  It bores me when you weep.                                 My loves you cannot touch.  They're buried deep."  ---Don Marquis
Current Album--Laurie Anderson:United States Live
Current Read--Tesseracts4
From: JBrandt@AAA.UOregon.EDU (Jason)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: A Christmas Story
Followup-To: alt.callahans
Date: 28 Dec 1992 16:51:43 GMT
Organization: the Polyhedron Group
Distribution: world
NNTP-Posting-Host: aaa.uoregon.edu

In article <1992Dec25.075320.24135@rock.concert.net>,
darkshot@rock.concert.net (Michael B Garrett -- Chudys) wrote:
>  "A toast: To engineering- a talent so formidable that it can make you 
> believe in magic- even when you know how it works. And to my Dad- a master
> magician. The world is poorer without you, and your talents. If there is
> an afterlife, you're gonna have to explain that one to me. Cheers!

<<CRASH!!>>

Jason
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: jammer@eskimo.com (Lyle Harwood)
Subject: Snowball
Organization: -> ESKIMO NORTH (206) For-Ever <-
X-Newsreader: TIN [version 1.1 PL6]
Date: Wed, 30 Dec 1992 10:45:26 GMT


Jammer walks in, and pauses to survey the cup of mocha sitting on
the pile of dollar bills.

Satisfied, he turns to the crowd and asks
"Who will drink with me?
Bartender!  Mocha for those with the strength for it, and whatever
they would have for the rest!
It's a cold night, and the wee wench who calls herself my Old Lady..."

The door burst open. Snow swirls in, and a powerfull Lady steps into the
room.

"Jammer?" In spite of the question mark, the Lady is delivering a
demand.

Jammer peers over his shoulder, and mutters "oh, oh..."

"We wern't finished!" So saying, she delivers a snowball dead on the 
back of Jammer's neck. Jammer dives desparetly for the cover of a chair,
but to no avail. The second snowball catches him on the side of his
head, much to the amusement of the assembled patrons.

The Lady gives a sparkling laugh, and cries 
"NOW we can be done with it!" and turning, races out the door.

Jammer unties himself, glares at the offending chair, and with a roar
lurches to his feet, and charges out the door, slamming it behind him.
For ten full minutes, the patrons of The Place are treated to the sounds
of a pitch battle of snow, complete with screams, hollers, and laughter.
Then silence returns, as Jammer and his Old Lady head for a wet, content
homecoming.

In spite of winters past, Jammer loves the snow.
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk (Mary Branscombe)
Subject: Re: 1993
Reply-To: maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk
Date: Sat, 2 Jan 1993 18:30:00 +0000


"Which Joe Jackson album is that? I don't think I've heard it yet 
(music is like frinds, just waiting around to corner for you)
All Lovers Arer Deranged has a wild screaming tune (Tanais tells me 
it runs 120/140 bpm) and at the end they drop Dave Gilmour and guitar 
off the top of a very high cliff (that what *I think it sounds like!)

"The world is wide, wild and deep - big enough to be free and small 
enough for wonderful synchronicities.....

"You think Houston has a problem with snow? Every other year snow 
shuts this country down - they use helicopters to airlift food to 
remote villages - that's a really bad winter. But the *really funny 
thing is the trains. They must know that it snows here every so 
often... but they still build new trains that don't seem to know 
about snow - with one design the doors froze open! And they say it's 
the "wrong kind of snow"! Similarly, in autumn, unseasonal events 
occurr - the leaves drop of the trees onto the tracks... and the 
trains can't run! Sheesh! Now they're saying they will have sold off 
the rail network to private industry by this time next year. Ignatz, 
I think you've got the right idea - let's stick to steam!

"Too much seriousness! More dancing! C'mon Bi-Bulb" and MerryTail 
grabs him by the hand and whirls him away in dance.

Mary MerryTail... by the way - who was collecting those recipes? Is 
the cookbook still on the boil?
+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+
| Ommmmmm, said the lift                    |maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk |
| Organisation: Me? You're joking, right?   |maryb@cix.compulink.uucp  |
|I know I type "teh" for "the" My fingers have their own accent ;-)    |
+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+

Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: aahz@netcom.com (Mean Green Dancing Machine)
Subject: Re: Definition of "monogamy"?
Organization: Don't blame me, I voted for Bill 'n' Opus
Date: Thu, 24 Dec 1992 01:05:08 GMT

BTW, based on some responses I'm seeing, just wanted to ask that people
discuss the *definition* of "monogamy", rather than whether or not they
themselves are monogamous.  Kitten and Mike have done a good job so far.
-- 
                         --- Aahz (the *other* Dan Bernstein)
                             @netcom.com 

Hugs and backrubs -- I break Rule 6

Virtual anniversary: 8 days and counting
From: carole@rembrandt.Sun.COM (Carole Parker)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: It's a girl!
Date: 30 Dec 1992 06:27:57 GMT
Organization: Sun
NNTP-Posting-Host: rembrandt

In article <1992Dec11.160645.3043@e2big.mko.dec.com> pel@maximo.enet.dec.com (Phillip E lujan) writes:
>CONGRATULATIONS BRUMBY AND ROBYN!!!!!
>
>"'Jennifer Rhiannon McNamara', hmm?  Beautiful name - but then, I'm biased.

I'm not biased; I'm just late in my congrats!

*E-HUGS*
>
>FREE DRINKS FOR EVERYONE WHO JOINS IN THE TOAST..."
>
Count me in.

To a healthy daughter and a quick recovery for your wife.




I found myself. See? I'm right here! Until later--

Carole Parker
From: Wales.Larrison@ofa123.fidonet.org
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Response and Request
X-Sender: newtout 0.02 Nov 17 1992
Date: 26 Dec 92  22:21:02

I'll apologise for this message to the general patrons of the bar --
I tried to take this to email and the message bounced.
  
   Rich Krum/Troll -- here's the bounceback message...
]   ----- Transcript of session follows -----
]Connected to theophilus.msfc.nasa.gov:
]>>> RCPT To:<rich@theophilus.msfc.nasa.gov>
]<<< 550 <rich@theophilus.msfc.nasa.gov>... User unknown
]550 <theophilus.msfc.nasa.gov!rich@jpl-mil.Jpl.Nasa.Gov>... User
]unknown
  
And the message ...
-----------------------------------------------------------
Rich Krum/Troll writes:
  
>Obligatory Joke:
> How can you tell the difference between a "California Cowboy" and
>a real cowboy?
> 
>The real cowboy has manure on the OUTSIDE of his boots-----
> 
> --Troll, who is not a real cowboy (and doesn't wear boots much) --
  
Ahh Troll...
    Could you do me a favor and NOT tell such California jokes?
  
    1) I'm a native California, so's my wife, and so's my family.
  
    2) I grew up wearing boots and working around cattle.  Primarily
dairy cattle, but lots of the folks in the area wore Stetsons and
boots, and rode and owned horses. I've squished my way through lots
of muck in my boots, and I know what side the muck stays on.
  My wife's from Northern California, up in the Lassen area, and her
family still makes money from grazing fees for range cattle.
  I'm not a California Cowboy, but I've got friends who come pretty
close to being real California Cowboys in that they ride, rope, and
raise range cattle.
  
    3) I find the joke rather offensive.  It's not a play on words
or a social commentary, but a direct derogatory statement.  Change
the word "California" in "California Cowboy" to any other ethnic
group, and it's still derogatory.
  
<<Sigh>> -- I try to be thick-skinned, but for some reason, this
joke really offended me.
                                                - Sincerely -
                                                Wales Larrison
  

--- Maximus 2.01wb
From: GE.LJB@forsythe.stanford.edu (Louis J Bookbinder)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: the search for stan...
Date: 31 Dec 1992 16:38:28 -0800
Organization: Stanford University
NNTP-Posting-Host: morrow.stanford.edu

Klong, klong!

Nick is busy in the corner pounding on VAX.

WHAT!!!!!

Vax, except once to help move something in the Place, has not moved out
of his corner in days - since Christmas. What?

"Why the heck are you just SITTING here, you dumb machine!" He shouts at
the mobile vacuum cleaner. But it just tries to squirm out from his
grip. Nick attacks with a screwdriver. He wants to get to the bottom of
this malfunction before the glass-drifts begin to interfere with the
fire.

But an amazing thing happens! As soon as he starts turning the screw
out, the driver slips and the screw WINDS BACK IN AGAIN! SHADES OF CLOSE
ENCOUNTERS! Nick sits back in surprise with a loud KLASH!

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING, YOU ANIMATED BUMPER CAR! I HAVE TO FIX YOU!" He
tries again, same result. He tries all 4 corners of the top cover. He
actually gets one screw all the way out, and has to hide put it in his
toolcase to keep Vax from retrieving it. (Where did Vax get the
manipulator arm?! Curiouser and curiouser!). But then Vax moves away and
Nick starts running after.

"Wait, wait! Vax! Come back!"

Vax runs into the back room. Nick follows. Vax goes through the back
door. Nick goes through the back door. Vax races through the snow to the
front door and back into the room. Nick, slipping and sliding from the
ice on his metal feet, manages to get in the front doorway just as the
door slams back closed.


   C R A S H !!!!!

3 or 4 patrons go to Nick's rescue. They carry him in, dazed, his nose
bent out of shape. Literally. Nick's eyes stop rolling and focus on Vax.
He is sitting quietly in the corner near the fire. Nick begins to get
ANGRY! Just then......

           to be continued
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: bshsiung@quip.eecs.umich.edu (Bernard Hsiung)
Subject: Re: *Now* I can celebrate.
Organization: University of Michigan EECS Dept., Ann Arbor, MI
Date: Thu, 31 Dec 1992 17:59:07 GMT

"Con--"
[I do what with my glass?!  Toss it in the -- you sure this is okay?
 Well, alright then...]

"Congrats, Taldin!"

<<CRASH!>>
--
Jedi Squire-in-Training (bshsiung@eecs.umich.edu)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk (Mary Branscombe)
Subject: Re: Dalek has entered the building
Reply-To: maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk
Date: Thu, 31 Dec 1992 03:17:00 +0000


"Hey Bi-Bulb! Do you get that Acme stuff the same place Ignatz does? 
Every time I go through his pockets I find more of it and he hasn't 
told me where it comes from yet! Think I'll go back to ticj=kling the 
answer out of him"
"Sniff. In RL, Ignatz has a lousy cold and he's lots of miles away so 
I can't even make sure he's tucked up warm. Anybody got an
1. Acme telporter tuned to Jersey
2. Acme cold-decolder?
Ah well...

Feather, Thyra, if I wrap my tail around the bit of the Dalek that's 
sticking up, that should give you some direction to shift it with. 
I'll pull and you do the lifting?"
Mary MerryTail ready to try something once....
+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+
| Ommmmmm, said the lift                    |maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk |
| Organisation: Me? You're joking, right?   |maryb@cix.compulink.uucp  |
|I know I type "teh" for "the" My fingers have their own accent ;-)    |
+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+