HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: greg@phoenix.Princeton.EDU (Gregory Nowak)
Subject: Re: Hmmmm
Originator: news@nimaster
Organization: Princeton University
Date: Thu, 10 Sep 1992 10:42:19 GMT

In article <1992Sep9.140531.4347m> mlegare@wetware.com (BoBteCh) writes:


}i think it's just till greg gets back in shape.
}he's been in france, you know.

Still am, homeboy! Don't tell me you've been confusing posting-station
with physical-location like a rank newbie!

Thank Cthulhu for Internet.

To touch me directly, use thomas@manitou.ensmp.fr  .


}and we all know how much that can take out of a person

No kidding. I am now quite used to paying for the privilege of eating
moldy cheese.


--greg                                     greg@phoenix.princeton.edu

        "greg came here for doughnuts and the zoo. "
        --grendel@csd4.csd.uwm.edu (The Big Squeegee)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: PJF4081@cc.utah.edu (mr. wonderful)
Subject: pellets
Followup-To: talk.bizarre,to.wasatch
Summary: good pellets are hard to find
Keywords: pellets damnit
Reply-To: mr. wonderful
Organization: committee for the advancement of disgust
Date: Sun, 13 Sep 92 19:31:58 MDT
X-News-Reader: VMS NEWS 1.10

the longer i work in lab the more paranoid i get that my DNA is just not there.
the only way i get over this is to label it with 32-P. at least then i can tell
where it is. i have gone for lengths of time doing reactions in which everything
is uncolored. they sometimes work, sometimes not. i think perhaps i am just
getting insecure. oh well. as i type this i am attempting to spin down a
miniscule amount of cDNA which i prepared this afternoon. i checked it and
there is no visible pellet. i guess i'll just have to use the geiger counter. i
used to work with 125-I. they would check my thyroid for contamination by
holding a geiger counter up to my throat. that always freaked me out. i was
always ok at least. a big good bye from utah to you all.   

          PJF---->Biochem. grad student. "suffering *is* my game.		
	  	            WORK  :==  FUTURE
	"i am involved in the petty business of scientific research."
                         "feel free to feel me."
	 stream of consciousness writing is just like abstract art
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: cliftonr@netcom.com (Pope Clifton)
Subject: Re: Srg Baker
Date: Sat, 12 Sep 92 08:29:46 GMT
Organization: t.b, t.p.d, & a.d

Nothing like a two-time loser.
Bye-bye, tzau, see you in hell! :-) :-) :-)
  -- Clifton

--
Home: cliftonr@netcom.com     +1 808 521 9073
Work: clifton_r@verifone.com  +1 808 625 3234
Pope of the Church of the Subgenius in Paradise
"Whatever flames upon the night/Man's own resinous heart has fed." - W. B. Yeats
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: rdc@netcom.com (MR. COMMUNIST)
Subject: OBSERVATIONS OF OHIO
Date: Wed, 09 Sep 92 19:50:13 GMT
Organization: Soviet Socialist Society, Incorp.


 OBSERVATIONS OF OHIO

o Ohio is like Mexico, except there are no mexicans, just a lot of
  white people, and you can drink the water.

o Mayonnaise, Mayonnaise, Mayonnaise.

o There is no more, there is no less, there is *exactly* one sushi
  restaurant in Toledo, Ohio: "En Japanese".  The fish was bad.
  You can tell when they cover the spice tuna rolls with heaps of
  vinegar.  I'm amazed I didn't get sick.

o Everyone drinks and smokes.

o Men are mostly assholes to women: drinking, beating, raping.

o People are so fucking small town and clueless about the World.

.
p.s. Bob's Big Boys had great onion rings, though.

-- 

IVAN IQTOVITCH,		"WORKERS UNITE  OVER IMPERIALIST PIG"
COMMUNIST PARTY,		--IVATOLI STEPHANIVIC,
MUSMAK DEVISION			  BRAVE MARTAR
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,alt.flame.marshal.perlman.weenie,alt.fan.letterm
From: bigdave@texas.tdd.sj.nec.com (David Sweeney  x2987)
Subject: Re: THE CREATION OF alt.flame.marshal.perlman.weenie
Organization: NEC-AM TDD, San Jose, California
Date: Tue, 8 Sep 1992 22:41:55 GMT

In article <1992Sep8.160812.17067@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> mperlman@nyx.cs.du.edu (Marshal "Airborne" Perlman) writes:
>hinz@picard.med.ge.com (David Hinz Mfg 4-6987) writes:
>
>>Marshal Airborne Perlman (mperlman@nyx.cs.du.edu) wrote:
>>: 
>>:                  Private Pilot - Airplane Single-Engine Land
>
>>Wow, pretty impressive, only 18 and has his pilot's license already.
>>With all of the training & flying hours involved, he must have started
>>when he was 12 or so.
>
>>And, daddy must have bought him a plane.  Boy, I wish MY daddy would
>>buy ME a plane.  Boy, I wish my daddy COULD buy me a plane.
>
>Actually STUPID..I paid for it myself..I have this thing called a JOB..somethin
>beyond your stupidity.
>
>Nothing pisses me off more then blowing a few grand of my cash and then having
>some net bastard tell me i didn't pay for it.
>YOU MAKE ME SICK! DO you hear me? I am sick and tired of you and your type.
>
>--
>Marshal Perlman - Huntington Beach - California - USA - Earth - Milky Way 
>                 Private Pilot - Airplane Single-Engine Land


I have a lot of respect for young people who work hard enough to earn the 
money for their avocations.  Most people just whine that things aren't given
to them like they should be, and so few really go out and work for them.

But I have a few questions for you...

1. How much is your rent?

2. How high is your car insurance?

3. What's your monthly food bill?

4. How much do you pay for health insurance?


What?  You live at home with the parents?  

Oh.

Never mind that first paragraph.

-- 
Dave Sweeney     bigdave@tdd.sj.nec.com
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: fulton@silver.ucs.indiana.edu (Ben Fulton)
Subject: Re: SUNBURST
Organization: Indiana University
Date: Tue, 8 Sep 1992 13:54:24 GMT

In <1992Sep8.122918.20615@Princeton.EDU> greg@phoenix.Princeton.EDU (Gregory Nowak) writes:

>}I turned to my bother.  "No winner," I said.  "Double or nothing on
>}the moon?"  He nodded, and we turned to look at the moon, which was
>}just rising.

>HOW COULD THEY SEE IT IF THE SUN BLEW UP, YOU ST*P*D F*CK*NG B*ST*RD?!

Infrared goggles, obviously.  Pay attention.

Can someone explain to me why the Purdue Armory Coke Machine sells "Tab"?

-- 
ben
fulton@silver.ucs.indiana.edu
"Get the hell out of my way!" - John Galt
From: lordSnooty@cup.portal.com (Andrew - Palfreyman)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: It's "Its"
Date: Fri, 11 Sep 92 02:46:05 PDT
Organization: The Portal System (TM)
Distribution: world

Sometimes when the room slopes all down to one side I
hate it. Its unfamiliarity (it's unfamiliar) is not
really comfortable and the subconscious part of being
picky (not a-R) rebels with a will.

But the best times are when I feel free and gracious
enough to accept with every gene-given sense the complete
and utter novelty of the event. It's at these times that
the unimaginable becomes real and we go on a little arabic
(as they would have said) trip (well, 60s or 1600s, it's
all the same) and do the magic carpet ride tee emm.

Discombobulate into a corner if you're a wimp! Your offspring
may hate you forever for this.....better it is, ah so much
better it is to go with the flow tee emm and ride the fucking
wave!  

Here we are, rolling down the carpet; all the bookshelves and
paintings jut and strain at odd (and if they could, obtuse)
angles towards the immense balcony window wherethrough I tumble
forthwith.

The black family downstairs all grin as I and my furniture arrive,
all of a heap. There is the smell of sex in the air and I grin
lasciviously at the sportly females arrayed around the room. I
am offered a drink, and we talk of Steak Diane and the rising
price of pork. Someone puts on a CD but nobody dances, so
entranced we are (entranced I am) in the spontaneity of the
Arrival From Upstairs. When we're done, we are much later on.
 --------------------------------------------------------------------------
| lord snooty @the giant |  Would You Like Fries With That?                |  
| poisoned electric head |              andrew_-_palfreyman@cup.portal.com |
 --------------------------------------------------------------------------
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Hmmmm
From: rmk@rmkhome.UUCP (Rick Kelly)
Organization: The Man With Ten Cats
Date: Thu, 10 Sep 1992 04:44:35 GMT
Reply-To: rmk@rmkhome.UUCP (Rick Kelly)

In article <BuAFKG.w3@jfwhome.FUNHOUSE.COM> jfw@jfwhome.FUNHOUSE.COM (John F. Woods) writes:
>In <laoa2aINN1c6@aludra.usc.edu> rone@aludra.usc.edu (Ron Echeverri) writes:
>>Who nominated John F. Woods as talk.bizarre's Designated Flamer?
>
>>i thought it should be put to a vote
>
>That's what you get for throwing out the organization charts with the rest
>of the interdepartmental junk mail.
>


This is old news.  John got the vote about 4 years ago.

And the TBDF is elected for life.

Why doesn't anybody RTFM anymore?

-- 

Rick Kelly	rmk@rmkhome.UUCP	unixland!rmkhome!rmk	rmk@frog.UUCP
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: terri@csd4.csd.uwm.edu (St Theresa of the Net)
Subject: Re: the whole foods craze: 2
Organization: Computing Something Division
Date: Tue, 8 Sep 1992 23:48:10 GMT

In article <pjl41q8@fido.asd.sgi.com> cj@sgi.com (C J Silverio) writes:
>---
>Things in parfait jars on my kitchen counter:
>    adzuki beans
>    pinto beans
>    long-grain brown rice
>    brown basmati rice
>    wild rice
>    stone-ground whole wheat flour
>    buckwheat groats (kasha)
>    whole wheat soba
>    turbinado sugar
>    granola
>    soy flakes

Ohhhh, don't forget black beans, and barley, and and and.... different
forms of corn, and wheat berries, and and and COFFEE.

>Things in my refrigerator:
>    tofu
>    yogurt
>    shoyu
>    tamari  (I couldn't decide which was better)
3-week old containers of chili-beans and some really weird spaghetti sauce
that i didn't use because all my single-serving tupperware stuff wasn't
clean.

>it's the soy flakes that convince me I'm unamerican

BUT WHERE DO YOU GET ALL YOUR PROTEIN?
-- 
A little bit of uh huh and a whole lot of oh yeah.   \  (414)CRUSH-13
T. Flynn's Casa de Interesting: 1755 N Cambridge Ave #306 Milwaukee WI 53202
From: curtis@cs.berkeley.edu (Curtis Yarvin)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: the craving of the metal west
Date: 10 Sep 1992 07:20:26 GMT
Organization: CS Dept. Snakepit - Do Not Feed.
Distribution: world
NNTP-Posting-Host: boa.cs.berkeley.edu
Summary: the anti-killfile, new-n-improved

What hath God wrought?

This.

/From: Morrisa/h=M
/From: adw/h=M
/From: ajd/h=M
/From: al677/h=M
/From: andsol/h=M
/From: annie/h=M
/From: bard/h=M
/From: bc/h=M
/From: benth/h=M
/From: bhought/h=M
/From: billbill/h=M
/From: chaos/h=M
/From: chrisl/h=M
/From: cpl1/h=M
/From: dmmc/h=M
/From: dolan/h=M
/From: drseuss/h=M
/From: goodman/h=M
/From: gooley/h=M
/From: greg/h=M
/From: grendel/h=M
/From: gypsy/h=M
/From: hin9/h=M
/From: jenine/h=M
/From: jfw/h=M
/From: jjj/h=M
/From: jon/h=M
/From: ken/h=M
/From: kimy/h=M
/From: klm/h=M
/From: kludge/h=M
/From: kohli/h=M
/From: larne/h=M
/From: ldoering/h=M
/From: lefty/h=M
/From: lordSnooty/h=M
/From: lstewart/h=M
/From: lucy/h=M
/From: mathew/h=M
/From: middle/h=M
/From: mjd/h=M
/From: mlegare/h=M
/From: mrx/h=M
/From: nj/h=M
/From: ra/h=M
/From: ranjit/h=M
/From: richh/h=M
/From: rmk/h=M
/From: rmr/h=M
/From: rosen/h=M
/From: rpwhite/h=M
/From: sean/h=M
/From: sho/h=M
/From: spt/h=M
/From: state/h=M
/From: stevelee/h=M
/From: terri/h=M
/From: thinman/h=M
/From: thoth/h=M
/From: vail/h=M
/From: waterman/h=M
/From: zed/h=M
/From: tzau/hj
/subject: Re:/hj

If you're not featured above, and you've posted anything
EVEN REMOTELY RESEMBLING a clue in the last 3500 articles,
please send me mail.

c
hard work pays off
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: mbur@nyx.cs.du.edu (MAC)
Subject: Re: Fuck you, Dave Hill, and the sausage you rode in on
X-Disclaimer: Nyx is a public access Unix system run by the University
	of Denver for the Denver community.  The University has neither
	control over nor responsibility for the opinions of users.
Organization: Nyx, Public Access Unix at U. of Denver Math/CS dept.
Date: Tue, 15 Sep 92 13:03:02 GMT

In article <pril6ig@fido.asd.sgi.com> cj@sgi.com writes:
>
>rwd4f@poe.acc.Virginia.EDU writes:
>|Once again, I have been flamed by a loser. this time its:
>
>Once again, you have flamed a well-loved and respected oldbie, a
>man with a ponytail longer than any ponytail YOU'LL ever find
>extruding from your pustulent skull.
>
>---
>c j silverio

That's not hard, Dobson is completely bald.


M
From: kelley@vet.vet.purdue.edu (Stephen Kelley)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Religious Request
Summary: Judgment
Date: 8 Sep 92 22:46:15 GMT
Organization: Carps Underground Contract Bridge League

Would someone ask the pope to make me a bishop?

I need a great see.

THANK YOU all
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: rwd4f@poe.acc.Virginia.EDU (Rob Dobson)
Subject: Re: SSC
Organization: University of Virginia
Date: Mon, 14 Sep 1992 13:03:46 GMT


> rpwhite@taurus.cs.nps.navy.mil (rpwhite) shocks the world with his startling
confession:


>>I sometimes confuse Don Dodson with Rob Dobson.


Normally, I would get offended. But since I have been having some deep email
conversations with Duh--I mean, DON, I have come around.
Feminism is evil.
Sex is evil. I should avoid having it.
Homosexuality is evil, that is why it is ok to lie awake at night thinking
about just HOW evil it is, and how much Dons cute little butt does NOT
excite me and, and,......

oops


>>
>>rp -- but then again, I sometimes confuse Virginia with Purdue.
>

Yes, Virginia Is just WAY TOO LIBERAL FOR ME.

Why, can you believe they even have an office of PLANNED PAERENTHOOD, front
organization for satan, here.

Im moving to purdue as soon as Don ditches his old boyfri--i mean, disciple,
and lets me move in.

-rob


Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: mlegare@wetware.com (BoBteCh)
Subject: focus dammmit focus
Organization: sulphur & oxygen
Date: Sat, 12 Sep 1992 07:07:37 GMT

"I think I've figured out the one thing
 I really REALLY want in life."

"What's that?"

"Orgasms.  And lots of them."


BoB
teCh
the poison must be expelled

Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,rec.humor,alt.sex,soc.culture.arabic,alt.fan.letterman
From: zerobeat@intacc.uucp (Ferenc Szabo)
Subject: Re: KNOCK KNOCK JOKES
Date: Thu, 10 Sep 1992 18:19:28 GMT
Organization: Inter/Access' Matrix BBS

In article <Bu54C3.B0o@animal.er.bell.ca> sgordon@er.bell.ca (Steven Gordon) writes:
>In article <b-mn0bc.rdc@netcom.com> rdc@netcom.com (MR. COMMUNIST) writes:
>>
>>
>>KNOCK KNOCK?
>>WHO'S THERE?
>>NEWBIE.
>>NEWBIE WHO?
>>SATAN.
>>
>Huh? I don't get it...

Just be sure to tell your mom.....SATAN!

ferenc




Xref: sparky talk.bizarre:29009 soc.culture.british:12195
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,soc.culture.british
Subject: Re: THE COMPLETE BRITISH TO AMERICAN DICTIONARY
From: ace@kryton.UUCP (Catherine Beckstead)
Date: Fri, 04 Sep 92 16:09:56 PDT
Organization: Paradox Alley F&SF BBS 805-492-8789

Robert.Hartill@cm.cf.ac.uk (virtual user) writes:


> or better still
> 
> American          British
> --------          -------
> small        <-   big
> football     ->   commercials
> Dan Quayle   ->   Mr Bean
> England      <-   Britain
> PhD          ->   A Level
> 
> Now that's more fun isn't it.
> 

A lot more fun, and yes I can see DQ as Mr. Bean.  :)
Now speaking of A levels, could someone please explain to me what
"levels" are.  I hear them talked about in the British shows we get 
here in the US, and here on the net, so I'm curious.  Thanks in
advance!
-Cathy

-------------------------------------------------------------------
Catherine Beckstead                    ace@kryton.uucp
"Do you want to argue with a can of deodorant that registers
NINE on the Richter scale?"        --Ace, in "Dragonfire"
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: please continue
From: rmk@rmkhome.UUCP (Rick Kelly)
Organization: The Man With Ten Cats
Date: Fri, 4 Sep 1992 22:59:30 GMT
Reply-To: rmk@rmkhome.UUCP (Rick Kelly)

In article <Bu0Fow.28C@news.larc.nasa.gov> kludge@grissom.larc.nasa.gov ( Scott Dorsey) writes:
>In article <4Lm-!D+@engin.umich.edu> ldoering@engin.umich.edu (Laurence Doering) writes:
>>In article <NJ.92Sep2092844@magnolia.Berkeley.EDU> nj@magnolia.Berkeley.EDU (Narciso Jaramillo) writes:
>>>
>>>the fluorescent lights continue their insidious buzzing, programming us all to
>>be better citizens and consumers.  Yes.  Yes, that's it.  The nail that sticks
>>up gets hammered down.  Conform, the lights seem to say.  Conform, and all
>>will be well.  He sat there, staring intently at the television set, the
>buzzing still in his ears.  His Nelson ratings were beginning to drop; he had
>only managed an average of eight hours a day for the last week, and he knew
>that he had to bring that up.  He sat backed, loosened his pants, and flipped
to the Playboy channel.  He began to slowly, but firmly, massage himself.

-- 

Rick Kelly	rmk@rmkhome.UUCP	unixland!rmkhome!rmk	rmk@frog.UUCP
From: cj@eno.wpd.sgi.com (C J Silverio)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: the whole foods craze: 2
Date: 8 Sep 92 17:27:30 GMT
Reply-To: cj@sgi.com (C J Silverio)
Organization: SGI TechPubs

---
Things in parfait jars on my kitchen counter:

    adzuki beans
    pinto beans
    long-grain brown rice
    brown basmati rice
    wild rice
    stone-ground whole wheat flour
    buckwheat groats (kasha)
    whole wheat soba
    turbinado sugar
    granola
    soy flakes

Things in my refrigerator:

    tofu
    yogurt
    shoyu
    tamari  (I couldn't decide which was better)

---
c j silverio
it's the soy flakes that convince me I'm unamerican
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,alt.fan.letterman
From: dmatt@iastate.edu (Daniel I Matt)
Subject: Re: Letterman Qoutes
Organization: hardly any
Date: Sun, 6 Sep 1992 06:13:06 GMT

In article <1992Sep3.174817.903@ccd.harris.com> jtm@controls.ccd.harris.com (J T Moser) writes:
>
>In article <15276@umd5.umd.edu>, walrus@bessel.umd.edu (Grig Larson) writes:
>|> 
>|> What are some of the dumb things he has repeated?  One I remember went on
>|> for weeks, and they even made a skit about it.
>|> 
>|> (Dumb voice) "Them bats is smart, they use radar..."
>|>  
>|> 
>|> walrus@bessel.umd.edu                                cforrester@gizmonic.com
>|> ============================================================================
>|>        "We're not evil, just misunderstood in the name of science..."
>
>I think this one was repeated while they did a weeks worth of shows in Hollywood:
>
>   "Who loves you baby."
>
>They were trying to find Telly Savalas the entire week and would show a picture
>of him every now and then and say the above Telly Savalas line.

   I remember a year or two ago when for a little while he would keep showing 
this clip of a group of owls with one choking down a whole mouse and the song
"Tomorrow" from Annie would be playing the background.  Pretty weird!

   Also, what are some of your favorites of "Hal Gurnee's Network Time 
Killers"?
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: act@csc.canberra.edu.au (Cyclops)
Subject: Re: Top tips
Organization: University of Canberra, Camaroon
Date: Tue, 8 Sep 92 03:23:29 GMT

tskelly@ccvax.ucd.ie writes:

>Fed up of hearing about all this violence in the world today?
>Kill yourself - Hey presto! your violence blues are over.
 
Or just wear orange pants and a green top!

act@csc.canberra.edu.au       ceteris paribus
Look Once...         .-)      
   Look TwEyece..    .-) .-)       
      Half See...    .-)         
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: 11dmcvay@gallua.gallaudet.edu (Daniel T. McVay)
Subject: Stupid Sellers...
Organization: Gallaudet University
Date: Sun, 6 Sep 1992 04:07:10 GMT

I just wonder....


How many people are stupid enough to try to sell a bike from the early 80's
for a hundred twenty five? I mean, damn, the tires were old, the handlebars
were freakish and so on.

Come on, world, get to your senses...


-- 
Daniel Mcvay	11dmcvay@gallua.gallaudet.edu	11dmcvay@gallux.gallaudet.edu
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Concrete Shoes,Cyanide,TNT,Done Dirt Cheap,Neckties,Contracts,HIGH Voltage
From: al037@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (Dave Polewka)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Definition of an addict.
Date: 7 Sep 1992 15:46:16 GMT
Organization: Case Western Reserve University, Cleveland, OH (USA)
Reply-To: al037@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (Dave Polewka)
NNTP-Posting-Host: slc4.ins.cwru.edu


In a previous article, tomf@ai.bunny.gte.com (Tom Fawcett) says:

>HAW HAW HAW HAW!!!@!@!
>I GET IT !!!!11!1!1!1!!!!!!
>MARVIN MINKSKI IS AN AGNOST!C BECAUSE HE CANT UNDERSTAND HOW THE
>ACTIONS OF AN UNSEEN GOD AFECT HIS EVERYDAY L1FE !!@!!@!@!!!!!
>HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW !!@!@@@!@!@@!  
>LIKE DAN QUALE CANT UNDERSTAND NEURODEVELOPMENTAL EPISTEMOLOGY !@!@!!@!!!
>I GETIT !@!@!@@!

Why so bitter, Sarcaso?

-- 
=======================
"Endeavor to persevere"
=======================
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: elvis@netcom.com (kEvin A. Thornbury)
Subject: Musings from the grave
Date: Tue, 15 Sep 92 19:32:41 GMT
Organization: Netcom - Online Communist Services  (408 241-9760 guest) 
Summary: summary
Followup-To: talk.bizarre,misc.test
Keywords: onomat synethesia cocoanut flame oatmeal what's that smell
X-Alternatetitle: Honey, I'm Using an Old Gag Again 


Latenight, after hard days, I often cannot sleep. If I've been running
without enough sleep for too long, I enter a state of exhausted alertness
as my adrenal system shows off. My brain is never impressed, and dislikes
showoffs to boot. Generally, it snubs my body and reacts to sensory input
like the homecoming queen to the class nerd. Senses get the wrong type
response; I enter a state of synethesia.

In this state, I read talk.bizarre.


Feeling my way through the threads, I grabbed a nice thick one that seemed
like it would have that solid feel you only get from quality rope. I recoiled.
[YOW!] Solid, solid flame! [ oh, gypsy came back]

Shaking my head to clear the flash of heat from my eyes, I started reading
sequentially. Some of the articles sounded like beautiful symphonic arrangements
interwoven with odd bits of melody and snatches of rap. I could feel the bass
coming off those posts, they must have been truly bizarre. I kept running across
one thread that didn't sound at all like that. It sounded like Muzak punctuated
by cocoanuts being smacked together. [feelings, nothing more than *KLONK*...]
The first time I was puzzled; the second intrigued. What in the world could
produce that sound? I listened some more, then Ahah! Got it. Someone left a
pro-life untied and it came around to butt heads with our pet pro-choicers.
That's not bizarre. [I tell people not to feed strays so they won't hang around,
but there always seems to be a dish of abortion posts on the porch.]

Hmmmn, what is that smell? [sniff, sniff] The aroma is reminiscent of
Nowak, but it seems off, like it hasn't been properly stored. I can't
smell the hint of fear that usually surrounds those threads. Somehow,
I [YUCK! STINKO! PU!] Why did I leave those bills on the table, my eyes
scanned that Discover bill, and I won't be able to get that smell out of
mind for days. [sort of like decayed fun mixed in with the smell of ashes
from a crematorium, with a hint of grapefruit]

Now I feel like a small child forced to eat a large bowl of cold oatmeal
that has bits of chocolate every now and then. Unending stretches of 
tasteless blah punctuated by dark sweet flashes. I do need to hurry
though, I have an appointment for another lunch at the Onomat.


kEvin
practice, step in front of that bus, take the El Cerrito turnoff...
From: rdc30@nmrdc1.nmrdc.nnmc.navy.mil (Code-03 LCDR Michael E. Dobson)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: CREATION OF ALT.WANTED.PROSTITUTE
Date: 14 Sep 92 16:42:28 GMT
Organization: Naval Medical Research & Development Command

In article <fulton.716244808@silver> fulton@silver.ucs.indiana.edu (Ben Fulton) writes:
>In <rdc30.3.0@nmrdc1.nmrdc.nnmc.navy.mil> rdc30@nmrdc1.nmrdc.nnmc.navy.mil (LCDR M. Dobson) writes:
>
>>Someone who is supposed to have a clue proposed:
>>>
>>>I would like to create alt.wanted.prostitute.
>
>How about misc.jobs.blow?
>

BZZZT!! Wrong.  It's misc.jobs.wanted.blow

sheesh, some people.
-- 
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