From: Albert-Lunde@nwu.edu (Albert Lunde)
Subject: Re: Bisexual idenity and community
Followup-To: soc.bi
Originator: lunde@casbah.acns.nwu.edu
Reply-To: Albert-Lunde@nwu.edu (Albert Lunde)
Organization: Ministry of Silly Walks
Date: Sat, 9 Jan 1993 18:06:27 GMT

In article <C0KJM0.DGy@news.udel.edu> 
 seamus@ravel.udel.edu (James G Dilmore) writes:
>I want to redirect the conversation at this point.  
>I have been challenging the idea of a label and a bisexual identity
>because I want to figure out how the bisexual identity is formed, if there is
>one, and what effect it has on a bi community.
>
>General comments:
>
>It has been stated on a variety of current threads that everyone has
>a different definition of bisexuality.  With such a multiplicity of
>personal idenities can a general "bisexual idenity" be constructed.
>Why should it be constructed, one may ask.  I think that it has a lot
>to do with community building.  
>
>At one level a bisexual community and personal idenity is created 
>as soon as one differentiates oneself from the het label and the
>gay/lesbian label.  I believe that this distinction is not enough to
>actually form a community(such as soc.bi) on.  (or is it? comments?)
>I think that there must be some more commonality among the group for it
>to actually coagulate.  Perhaps this has come from external forces such as
>the stereotype of bis as hypersexual and/or confused which has been imposed
>from both the het and the lesgay communities.  This could be a crystallization
>agent for a community.  This is then transformed into a more positive image.
[...]
>I think that a community is formed by several individuals who congeal 
>together based on some common interests or afflictions, be it either
>rites based, experienced based, or world view based.  My real question is
>with such a multiplicity of ideas and attitudes in the bisexual community
>(even on the fundamental idea of what bisexuality is) then what is there to
>congeal around?  Is it a general feeling of rejection from both the het and
>lesgay communities or a feeling of "just not fitting in"?
>
>I really think that this is a community but I just can't figure it out
>when I try and get back to its basics. [...]

I've been asked via e-mail to offer my views on this thread, so I may
pontificate at some length. But first let me say: IMHO IMHO YMMV YMMV 
BYOB RSVP SMTP etc... ;)

                              *   *   *

I think bisexual identity is important to community building. At the same
time, I see the long term goal of a sexual liberation movement as trying
to make sexual identities built around sexual orientation obsolete except
as purely discriptive terms. Bisexuals need to organize as a group, 
but ultimately the most revolutionary act will be to change the idea 
of "normal" to encompass us all; not to build higher walls around a 
queer or bi ghetto.

I've spoken before of the one box, two box, three box and no boxes models
of sexuality. ("One box" being "everybody" is/should be heterosexual, etc.)

I'm saying we are aiming for a world without boxes, not trying to set
in stone the label or category "bisexual".

*However*, our immediate tactical goals may well seem to differ from 
this long term goal, especially when we are trying to move people
beyond the "two box" model ("everybody is either heterosexual or
homosexual, and these are very different"). We will often need to
establish the existence and legitimacy of bisexuality and bisexual
identity.

                              *   *   *

All that said -- there are still questions like "what do you mean by
bisexual?" and where does "bisexual identity come from?"

Because there is no sharp dividing line in behavor between bisexuals
and other groups, I focus on feeling and self-identification more
than some "objective" measure for sorting people into boxes.  I want
to generally respect people's self-understandings.  This is why my
definitions may seem flexible or subjective.

Bisexual behavior has clearly existed for a long long time; at the same
time, in our society, it has been difficult to differentiate homosexuals
from bisexuals as seperate groups until the restrictions of the closet
were eased.  If all queers are putting up a het front, it is hard to
see who has a genuine enthusiasm for both sam-sex and mixed-sex relations.

I suspect, therefore that a popular understanding of bisexuality
does not much predate the modern gay liberation movement. Another
important milestone was the Kinsey reports (1948 and 1953). Clinical
ideas may go back to early sexologists like Krafft-Ebing or Freud.

In my writing about bisexuals, I've worked a lot with myth lists. It is
my impression that myths about bisexuals are rooted in circumstances of 
70's and in ideas passed on from the closeted times preceeding them.

For example there are myths based on:

 - "Bisexuals are swingers"
   from the 70's "sexual revolution" setting

 - the "Sleeping with the Enemy" model and
 - the "Political Lesbian" (in denial of their own bisexality)

   from lesbian feminist/seperatist ideology and practice

 - the "half-way out of the closet" model or
 - the "he/she done me wrong" model

   from gay and lesbian "war stories"

 - polymorphous perversity -- a.k.a. everybody is bisexual so we
   don't take it *seriously*

   from popularizations of Freud

And I think a lot of the ideas of bisexuals as "confused" come from
people with rigid ideas of sex roles projecting their confusion
onto us.

One exception to this trend of myths being decades old, at least,
is the myths about bisexuals and AIDS -- but these are rooted
in older homophobia and biphobia.

With all this stuff floating around, it is a wonder that *anyone* can
form a clear self-understanding of themselves as bisexual.

I think self-identified bisexuals could be ranked according to
how much exposure they had to the term "bisexual" and the idea of
bisexuality before circumstances forced them to come to terms
it their feelings of attraction to both sexes.

Some people "can see it coming" others are "surprised". Some folk
have few or no role models, others have better information.

                              *   *   *

In my own case, my "coming out" process started in college ('71-'75)
as I was educating myself on sexuality.  I relied a lot on the feminist
movement for information on sexuality, as they seem a lot more open
and direct than anyone else at time time. Now, this gave me some
new-style feminist sterotypes to sort our later, but it also gave
me positive views of lesbians and gave me some basic information 
about bisexuality. 

I met the Rogerian councelor to whom I've gone for a number of year
as she was leading a workshop on bisexuality (though she did
not then identify as a bisexual.)

In several forums on human sexuality and feminism, the idea of bisexuality
got raised.  (It may be noted, that while I was calling myself "unlabeled"
I kept coming back to these forums and exploring the subject.)

I was also fortunate that "Chicago Bi-ways" was in existence (a year or two
later), so that I had a place where I could meet other people interested
in bisexuality and experience the rare setting where bisexuality
was the norm.

I didn't really know where I was going but at least I had some ideas
beyond popular myths to "hang" my experience on.

                              *   *   *

One of our jobs as activists and educators is to replace simple minded 
ignorance or myths with diverse reality-based examples and a complex,
multi-dimensional view of human sexuality.

In building Bi community we are immediately addressing the needs for
support, social connections and a meeting place where bisexuality
accepted.

In doing Bi politics we are calling the larger society to accountability:
the church, state, and other institutions of the het "mainstream" and the
gay, lesbian and feminist "counterculturual" communities. We are both
identifying a bisexual politics and making explicit the idea of a larger,
inclusive "queer" movement.

We are making a positive affirmation of the bisexual experience.

We are saying:
 "Come out, come out, whatever you are"

 "We're here... Get used to it!"

 "Bisexuals have twice the fun!"

;) ;)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
 

... Oohh! ... I knew it was going to be long, but I didn't know it
would be that long.

I don't know if I've answered Jim's original questions or not.

Anyone who has read this far is offered a hug...

-- 
 Albert Lunde         | Interfaith  |     *Y*Y*      "A branch on the
 Albert-Lunde@nwu.edu |  Bisexual   |      *Y*        tree of life"
                      |  Feminist   |.......|.........................
Newsgroups: soc.bi