From: haushalt@research.nj.nec.com (Robert C.Haushalter)
Subject: The Walsh Flat    Part I: Christmas Day
Originator: haushalt@iris41.nj.nec.com
Organization: NEC Research Institute
Date: Tue, 12 Jan 93 16:20:07 GMT

The first to awake on Christmas morning was Kevin's father, Colin Walsh.  "Oh 
God I have to piss so bad" was his first thought.  He slowly pulled himself up 
from the dirty gray sheets of the bed.  He glanced over at his wife of 45 years still 
asleep.  "Has the stubble on her toothless chin always been that heavy?" he 
thought.  He made his way slowly to bathroom that the Walsh family shared with 
the people in the other flat. . . thank goodness it was unoccupied.  He went in, 
locked the door and sat his overweight, flabby buttocks on the cold seat.  He 
glanced to his left and noticed the steam radiator which was badly corroded from 
the salt accumulation from years dried urine.  The radiator was cold.  At least that 
smell didn't come out of it when it was cold.  No coal in the furnace again he 
thought.

He glanced down at the crotch of his underwear between his legs in front of him.  
"Holy shit," he thought, "this is a mess even for a European.  I changed these only 
a few days ago.  Skid marks this thick have sharp edges when they dry...I'll have 
to change a few days early this week."  As he left the bathroom he caught a 
glimpse of himself in the mirror.  The greasy, dishevled ring of hair on his bald 
head, the bloodshot puffy eyes and that nose.  The nose: huge, red, bulbous and 
covered with tiny purple veins.  "I guess after 50 years of hard liquor I shouldn't 
complain about the way I look," he thought.

On the way back to the Walsh flat he remembered how cold it was and decided to 
tell Kevin to go get the coal.  Why should I pay extra money for the harder coal 
when the peat and dusty lignite we use from Wales is almost as good he thought.  
He went to Kevin's room.  He opened the door and was confronted with the odor 
of dirty clothes, the beer bottles and urine.  There was an old VT 100 hooked to a 
pdp 11 on his desk.  By the chair in the corner were Kevin's girlie magazines and 
his box of tissues.  The wastepaper basket was full of used tissues.  But Kevin was 
not in his bed.

Colin knew that it was only about 10:15 and Kevin would not have left already 
left.  He went to their living room and found Kevin asleep on the sofa.  The large 
dark circle on the front of the sofa indicated that Kevin had once again pissed the 
furniture.  Now that he has that job at that computer company I was hoping he 
would get his own place and piss on his own furniture Colin thought.  He couldn't 
help however feeling a little pride as Kevin was the first one in the Walsh family 
in over eight generations that could read, such as it was.

This warm feeling soon left Colin as he remembered the coal and he gave Kevin a 
hard kick in the side as he shouted "Get yer lazy drunken arse off me couch!"  
Kevin lurched and fell off the couch.  As he lay there he wondered what he had 
done the night before to feel this bad and be this hungover.  He could remember 
his father kicking him awake since he was a young child.

Kevin stumbled thru the kitchen on his way to the basement to shovel the coal.  
His mother was fixing the usual Walsh Sunday breakfast:  angels on horseback 
(undercooked, fatty bacon wrapped around prunes and secured with a toothpick), 
boiled mutton and the ubiquitous kidney pie all washed down with warm, bitter 
ale.  Since it was Christmas, the Walshes were having their Christmas haggis.  
Mum makes the best haggis around Kevin thought.  This is really eating he 
thought to himself as he headed down the stairs to the furnace and coal bin.


 . . . . to be continued . . . 
-- 
The opinions are mine..not my company's.
Actually, everything is more complicated		

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