From: franklin@ug.cs.dal.ca (<<<***Steve Franklin***>>>)
Subject: Re: STEVE FRANKLIN STRIKES OUT!
Organization: Math, Stats & CS, Dalhousie University, Halifax, NS, Canada
Date: Thu, 13 Aug 1992 13:58:36 GMT

In <lefty-120892095445@lefty.apple.com> lefty@apple.com (Lefty) writes:

>[N.B. This thread was originally titled "STEVE FRANKLIN STRIKES BACK!" and
>subtitled "(moderately funny for me anyway)".  I leave it to the reader to
>judge the universality of Mr. Franklin's sense of "humor".]

I liked it

>> Then, back in Reality, what these 5 fine points can be interpreted as is:
>>    a) he has a computer, gifs, and lots of porn

>Strike one.  I don't do porn.  Reality is much more intriguing.

   And here you have it ladies and gentlemen! The first stage is denial.
The second stage is insanity. Lefty is well on his way to the fourth stage
(drooling on his keyboard).

>>    b) he could beat the pants off of a house plant when playing chess

>Strike two.  I never was able to get the hang of chess so I don't play it
>at all.  I do hold a shodan in go, however.

   This is most flattering of you. Basically, you're saying you couldn't
even beat a plant at chess. My, wonderful self-image you have there.
You must be at good tic-tac-toe player at least aren't you? Anything?
Is there anything you're good at Lefty? Damn southpaw. ya shoulda played
baseball... 

>>    c) he controls entire armies (only on his little IBM video games however)

>Strike three.  _Obviously_, I don't do IBM, video games or otherwise.

   Sorry, just because you fluked into a job with Apple, I figured you were
still stupid enough to use DOS. Heck, people like you are going
to turn the Mac INTO an IBM soon no doubt...

>>    d) he will be found 20 years after he dies ("Man, the smelll")

>You might want to spend a little time thinking about what this assertion
>says about you.

   Well, I thought about it. What does it say about me? Nothing. What does
it say about you? Well, that you spend too muchtime on your computer,
and few people now you exist. We'll start to miss you when the average
I.Q. on alt.flame increases. However, we will not mourn but PARTY!

>>    e) he is happy (because he thinks he is in LeftyLand)

>As distressing as you will no doubt find this, I _am_ happy.

   So was Ted Bundy no doubt (see your reference later on). I'm glad you're
content Lefty. I sure wouldn't be if I were you...

>> I was trying to conk you back into Reality Lefty.

>Tell me about "reality", Elvis.

   You ain't nothing but a loser... just posting all the time. 
   You ain't nothing but a loser... just wasting all my time.
   Wellll, you ain't never made me laugh, and you aint' no friend of mine...

clear now?

>>    Because I pity you. I don't want you to nourish my image, but to
>> acknowledge your lowly one. see?
>Hmm.  Stevie, why exactly would this be important to you?

   Because I'm a nice guy. Just being thoughtful.

>> Instead, I would be *ugh* sucking up to people like yourself. Unfortunately, 
>> I find you putrid, embarassing, tiresome, and DOTHAYA-like 
>> (Dropped-On-The-Head-AT-a-Young-Age)

>Oh, no doubt.  Which is almost certainly why you display this childish need
>to impress me in some fashion.

   Impress you? heh, that's funny. No more needs to be said.

>The only one who "pounced" on it was Darcy; the only one who defended him
>was you.

   Hmmm, I don't know if I'm defending Darcy, or just trying to piss you
off. Darcy may have erred, but he has apologized. You continue to rain
down your verbal puke upon us. 

>Hmm.  I suppose you could also say that after breaking into that dormitory
>down in Florida, Ted Bundy "responded a touch poorly."

huh?

>But tell me this: why do you feel so impelled to act as Mr. Darcy's
>apologist here?

   I'm not apologizing for Darcy. Never have I apologized for Darcy. 
However, I do get tired of your brow-beating, and find it sheer joy to
find flaw in everything you do and say. Too bad it's so easy though.

>Well thanks for sinking beneath my expectations, Stevie.

   Well, I'm crushed. (SARCASM ALERT)

>> I pride take my writing in.
>Heh.  I this hardly can believe.

   You have always been so witty and ORIGINAL. This was certainly
less than I thought you could come up with Lefty. "Well, thanks
for sinking beneath my expectations, " Lefty...
   (how's that for original?)

>If you're referring to your "contributions" to alt.fan.warlord, then I
>certainly missed them.  If you mean the drivel you dumped into alt.sex, I
>can only wonder what a _moral_ fellow like you might be doing there in the
>first place.  Other than exercising your homophobia, I mean.

   Oh yes, I'm homophobic by voicing the concerns of the catholic church
with respect to homosexual marriages and sex.
I'm a control freak because I value the life of the unborn child.
I'm bigotted because I don't think polyamory is a healthy environment for
a child to be raised in. 
I'm ignorant because I don't think like you. Heh, Lefty, you're priceless.
You're like a little kid who is so damn egocentric that the world must
revolve around him, and everything he thinks must be right. You're heading
for a big fall my friend.

>> *warning, scary thought follows*
>> Me and Kevin are the closest thing to friends you have on USENET. UGH

>Please, don't kid yourself.  I _don't_ want to be your pal, Stevie.  No
>matter how much you'd like it.

   Heh, I actually have no complaints with this. I'm glad we agree. 
Shake hands on it?

>> Answer the question. Answer the question. Answer the question.
>> How old are ya Lefty?

>Hey, you've made claims about my job, my friends, my life.  Since you're so
>omniscient, it shouldn't be a problem for you to determine how old I am.

   Okay. you want me to guess how old you are? I say you're TOO old. From
your posts of condascension where you negatively speak of the young un's
of college, I expect you are too old to posting this drivel. I expect you
should have grown out of this game long ago, but insisted on playing this
lovely LeftyLand game that makes you feel big and strong.

>I can see that you and Mr. Darcy seem to have a lot in common.  Neither of
>you seem to be sure whether you're individuals or groups.  Very curious.

   No. Darcy and I have a few things in common however. The ability to
reduce you to a mental wasteland. To make you exude words that make no sense.
The ability to continue posting in defense of orthodox morals when the
liberal tides of Usenet are against us. The ability to overlook the trash
and brow-beating you and your type insist on delivering.

steve
-- 
aasdSteveFranklin-Subliminal Psychology Major.ks;dlasBlueJaysRULEkasdfeahsdbfl
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qpuepriuPartyOneqtuj;,n.,xnc,kjasFlameMeNot!;lkj;lkgkjd;askElvisLivesjhfquweru
zx.cfranklin@ug.cs.dal.ca,sk;t;lrut[Superboy@ac.dal.cav.zx,Physics!eq3rwkh;oHA
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