From: dweddin@uoft02.utoledo.edu
Newsgroups: rec.games.chess
Subject: Re: Girls
Date: 17 Aug 92 20:05:41 EST
Organization: University of Toledo, Computer Services




>>> Okay, there's this girl whom I desperately like (the whole thing is rather
>>> sick, actually) and we get together and play chess every once in a while
>>> and I wind up beating her easily.
>>>
>>
 
>>ok, i think that what we have here is NOT a chess problem...it is
>>a MALE-FEMALE problem. i do not profess to be an expert on women,
>>but i do know enough to tell you....
>> 
>>   LET HER WIN!!!!

> 
> Excuse me...er..but.. that's about the last thing you want to do...

WRONG!!!

It's the FIRST and ONLY thing that you want to do. I've taught my 
girlfriend to play chess that way with GREAT SUCCESS!!! ( I define
success by her enjoying the game and going with me to the local chess
club and watching me play ).

sure, you can't let your girlfriend win ALL THE TIME, but you should
throw enough games so that they keep an interest in playing!!!!

> she may not take that well at all, given the history of their play.  
> the best thing to do is, i think, what he's suggested for himself.  show
> an interest in her interest in chess... 

ya, that looks GREAT on paper, and all of the other guys reading this
will probably applaud you on your politically correct stance...you are
treating your the girl with respect and dignity...how terrific.

of course, you have lost total sight of the ultimate goal here...our 
friend gene wants to...

   TAKE THIS GIRL OUT ON A DATE!!!!!

i think that this girl's USCF rating is of secondary concern to ol' gene.


gene,

do not listen to these people, you have to understand that girls and guys
are totally different. i have been out with many girls in my day...i've
learned a thing or two.

no relationship is built on 100% honesty. again, it is something that looks
great on paper, but in practice....


when a girl asks, "how do i look?" you ALWAYS say, "very pretty, honey." 
it doesn't matter what she looks like.

when she bakes cookies, you tell her that they're delicious and gobble
them down even though their burnt.

and when you're playing chess....remember that to her, it is "just a game"
that some people are pretty good at while to you it is intellectually 
challenging and requiring a great amount of thought and study...an art and
a science rolled into one.

the point??? paying too much attention to her game, and commenting on her
every move will most likely irritate the hell out of her, cause her to
lose interest, and to start avoiding you.

letting her win will make her happy. she will start to think that she is
a little better than she thought and leave you an opening to ask her
out on a DATE!!!!

yes!!!! a DATE!!!!!! everybody who is commenting is losing sight of the
ultimate goal!!!!


> letting her win is just wrong,
> if she has any self respect at all.  she'll most likely take that as
> an insult...

this is why gene has to be REALLY SNEAKY!!! use your talents to disguise
the fact that you are letting her win...if she figures it out, you're
sunk!!!!!

remember gene, there are no truer words than...

"all is fair in love and war"

pursuing the fair sex often requires doing low dirty and underhanded
things. what you do to win her over might make you disgusted with
yourself. you might be consumed with guilt and self loathing...but
when you have a warm body snuggled up to you on the sofa while watching
a wonderful old movie on the VCR, the faint smell of her perfume in
the air....you learn to live with your guilt...trust me.




>> 
>>that will keep her interested!!! if she starts getting bored, then
>>win a couple of games....just barely. that adds a bit of suspense!
>> 
>>don't rip her lungs out over the chess board and make her feel
>>stupid and then expect her to be romantically inclined towards
>>you.
>> 
> 
> I'm not saying he should blow her away, but rather use the time to
> work on things yourself - openings, etc.  developing her skills can
> help the relationship.  Unfortunately, being apart won't help...
>
 
geez, what a hypocrite!!!! your entire post is about being honest and
forthright with the girl, then you tell gene not to "blow her away".
well, if gene was being intellectually honest with her and has the
ability to blow her away, then he is obligated to do so!!!!

but even you know that ripping her apart over the board is counter-
productive to the ultimate goal...so you say to back off a bit.

i'm just saying to back off a bit more and let her win.



one thing that Todd and I both agree on is that "being apart won't help".

damn right!!! it's the kiss of death in any relationship...so work fast
before she leaves....find out what she likes to do and invite her to
do it...whether it be an art museum, miniature golf, or movies...then
develop a strong interest in it!!!!!  And if you HATE miniature golf,
then PRETEND TO LIKE IT!!!!

winning the affections of fair maidens is NOT for choir boys!!!

good luck, gene, i'm rooting for you!!!!

don

Newsgroups: rec.games.chess,rec.games.board