From: moon!cyberden!system@well.sf.ca.us
Newsgroups: rec.music.industrial
Subject: Re: performing industrial live
Date: Thu, 09 Apr 92 02:58:23 PDT
Organization: Indescribable Creations

ogre@ac.dal.ca writes:

> I'm in an industrial band that's planning on gigging around this summer.
> Does anyone out there who has experience in this regard have any advice?

Hmmm... sure, here are some easy pointers to remember while,
                'Gigging around the summer.'

        1. Make many dupes of your DAT tapes. They're bound to be:
                - Erased by laying them on a sub-woofer
                - Destroyed by spilling beer on it.
                - Lost at the cheap Italian resturant you ate at before
                  the gig.
        2. Get it in writing... before hand...
        3. Demand drink tickets or plainly put, free drinks.
                - Coke, Pepsi, Beer, Stoli
        4. Demand not to be held responsible for damage to club
           by vomit.
        5. Make sure they advertise. Send them fliers in advance.
           NEVER rely on the club to provide fliers/advertising.
        6. Double up on all cords or scout out all the local Radio
           Shacks near the club.
        7. Find out when load in/sound check is.
        8. Find out if someone will actually be there to let you in
           to load in/sound check.
        9. Find out why the person who was supposed to let you in to
           load in/sound check is late.
       10. Find out why the person who was supposed to let you in to
           load in/sound check is very late.
       11. Find out why the person who was supposed to have a club that
           night is very very very late. (AKA, the Kadavers Syndrome)
       12. Scout out all the Denny's near the club.
       13. Bring condoms, dental dams, whips, chains, whipcream,
                 vibrators, cockrings, laytex masks, and I.D.
       14. Bring extra toilet paper. (The soft kind unless you really
           love that motel grit #10 shit).
       15. Bring roadmaps, AAA cards, flares, 357 Magnum.
       16. Bring extra demos, stickers, CD's and anything else you can
           think of to sell at shows... Be creative... you're gonna need
           to pay for your gig this way. (You thought you were gonna get
           paid??)
       17. Demand a pizza rider if you can get away with it.
       18. Make sure the club doesn't tape your show behind your back and
           then sell them 4 years later when you've become rich and
           famous as rare, $100 a pop, scarce items.
       19. Make sure you NEVER book with a band/project/smeghead called:
                                SPLENDOR
       20. Set up as many radio interviews as possible like a day before
           or the day of your gig. Get a list of local radio stations 
           from the clubs you're playing at.
       21. Find out why the person who was supposed to interview you on
           the radio is late.
       22. Find out why your eventually taped interview was replaced by
           the Star Spangled Banner ala Jimi Hendrix followed by a rash
           of white noise.
       23. Never shack up with someone who drives a hearst.
       24. Always shack up with someone who drives a hearst.
           (These are one of those love/hate relationships)
       25. While on stage, it's not wise during your industrial energetic
           spasms to wail on that beer bottle and then ever so 
           masculinly, slam it down next to your keyboard when it's 
           anything more then 1/16th full.
       26. Bring something to open your keyboard with and mop out the
           beer.
       27. Never use a distortion box inline (DOD/BOSS) for vocals
           without at least 4 hours soundcheck.
       28. BRING EARPLUGS.
       29. Bring extra batteries for the distortion box you just can't
           do without.
       30. Bring EXTRA EARPLUGS for the audience for when you slap on 
           the distortion box.
       31. Pay your roadies. (Unless, of course, you your own roadie!)
       32. Never rub your eyes after a gig unless you've washed your
           hands with Tide.
       33. Don't drive to your gigs like a complete maniac... remember...
           you have a shitload of gear in your car, and sliding that
           curve around that 97 year old lady while shouting "ANARCHY",
           will only get all your gear compressed through the side glass
           windows and onto the street.
       34. Drive with all your gear through drive through fast food
           joints with your breasts/penis exposed. (Make for great
           local publicity.)
       35. Bring bail money.
       36. Bring lots of quarters for the pay phones.
       37. Bring lots of alchohol wipes for the pay phones.
       38. Bring Everclear instead of alchohol wipes as you can drink
           the Everyclear when no one is looking as well as clean your
           4-track's heads with it.
       39. Don't clean your DAT heads with Everclear.
       40. Bring shades.
       41. Make a list on a single piece of paper of ALL the contacts
           you will need while on your gig. Make copies and give them
           to everyone in the band and then make an extra and hide it
           somewhere smart. You should include:
                - Clubs, Radio stations, Magazines/fanzines
                - Hotels, Motels, Mom & Dad, Relatives
                - Friends who live nearby, Bail bondsmen
                - 24 hour Photo marts, strip joints (M/F)
                - Record stores, The Love Boutique, Drakes
                - Federicks of Hollywoods, The Free Clinic
       42. Never carry more then $5 change on you at one time.
       43. Never offer anyone a 'lift'.
       44. Always make sure there is one person by the car at all
           times during loading/unloading for a gig.
       45. If you can't unload your gear at night due to space
           constraints or you're just too fucking drunk, make
           sure you can see your car from where you are going
           to sleep. (IE: From the window, in front of the door).
       46. Sleep in your car with your gear and .357 Magnum.
       47. Shower at least in the morning. Be Kind.
       48. Bring your own towel, soap, toiletries and watch them!
       49. Never do a 'touring' gig for a percentage, always get a
           guarantee. (Get it in writing if you can). Percentage
           gigs are good for hometown...
       50. Be REAL nice to the soundman/club owner...at least until
           you've been paid.

I hope this small and probably incomplete list will help you on your 
quest to spread your good cheer to neighboring cities and states.

I know it's helped for me.


                           <X> O R C I S T

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