From: tj32633@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu (Ronin)
Subject: Re: "Do you mind if she's a virgin or not?"
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana
Date: Wed, 11 Nov 1992 18:23:12 GMT

ptyshih@watnow.uwaterloo.ca (Paul T.Y. Shih(Taku)) writes:

>In article <BxILLK.Kty@constellation.ecn.uoknor.edu> u235@rex.chb.uokhsc.edu (Yung-Jin Lee) writes:
>>In article <BxHGM5.Guv@watserv1.uwaterloo.ca> ptyshih@watnow.uwaterloo.ca (Paul T.Y. Shih(Taku)) writes:
>>>
Paul>   can't agree more. Actually if a girl from Taipei remains virgin
Paul>   after she reach 25, either she's from a very conservative family,
Paul>   or she has some personality problems, or she has some personal
Paul>   probelms. Same for men. And I think that is too unhealthy.

Yung-Jin> Virgin or not is nothing to do with conservative family
Yung-Jin> or personality problem. 

Paul>   Really? I think you are either being naive or lying.
 
     Hmmmm....  I've been following this particular part of the thread between
     Paul's arguments and whoever responds to him.  I agree with Yung-Jin that
     being a virgin has nothing to do with coming from a conservative family
     or a personality problem.  I feel that my parents are very conservative
     and I came to the US, when I was 3 years old so I have been 
     influenced by American culture.  I had a girlfriend for 6 months in 
     High School, where we fooled around, but we both had a mutual agreement
     not to have sex, because we knew the dangers and just didn't want to take
     the risks. 
    
     Please define, the personality problem that lies in this type
     of thinking.  Also, I dated a caucasian girl, so I definitely didn't 
     follow my parents wishes.  And I am not ashamed to admit that even in
     the Heat of Passion, we always and I stress always stopped before the
     actual act of sex.  I had many chances were both of us were ready, even
     had the condoms, but we just stopped from going any further.  This was
     when I was 17 and now I am 21, almost near that 25 age limit set by Paul
     and most of the girls that I have dated, agree with me that sex is not
     part of the deal unless I am prepared to marry them right afterwards.
     
     So I guess according to Paul, I and just about all the girls that I have
     dated have personality problems... because we refuse to join the crowd.
     

Yung-Jin> virgin should be proud of
Yung-Jin> herself.

Paul>  For what reason? Being unhealthy? Being a virgin has nothing
Paul>  to lose, but there's nothing to be proud of too.
 
   Paul, I think you should explain why a virgin is unhealthy...  As far as, I
   know, being sexual active does not give a person sometype of immunity 
   against diseases.  It should be the opposite or are all the Doctors wrong
   when they say not having sex is the best way to protect yourself against
   diseases.  When you say, that virgins have nothing to lose, you might want
   to give reasons why they don't.  I have gone to seminars about what is 
   being passed around by sexually active people and I will tell you that
   there are diseases out there that will get through just about all the
   protection that a person uses, unless both partners use all of them at the
   same time, then there is a slight decrease in chances of catching something.
   I believe that virgins have a lot to lose, life being the most important
   these days, also losing a person's virginity, has in my belief always been
   a special moment for everyone, you want to lose it with someone who means
   alot to you and not just because you want to be like everyone else.

   Also, what is there to be proud of by being sexually active.  I look at 
   being a Virgin as being able to withstand following the crowd, as being
   a nonconformer in a world of conformists.  Why would someone wish to say
   to everyone, "Hey!!!  I have slept with many people over the course of my
   life time, you must shower me with honor and gifts that are due to a person
   with great ability in getting someone to bed".  Chances are you will
   be shunned by just about everyone.

Paul, Sorry.  This was not meant to be a flame towards you, even though, it
sounds like one.  You just raised some issues which I feel strongly about and
so does a lot of people at my University.  


Ted Jan                    EMT-A                        | To save a Life in |
tj32633@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu   Basic Life Support Certified | Defeat is to Earn |
University of Illinois     First Aid Instructor         | Victory....       |
Champaign/Urbana           Community CPR Instructor     |                   |
-- 
Ted Jan                    EMT-A                        | To save a Life in |
tj32633@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu   Basic Life Support Certified | Defeat is to Earn |
University of Illinois     First Aid Instructor         | Victory....       |
Champaign/Urbana           Community CPR Instructor     |                   |
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