HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: dos@major.panix.com (Dave O'Shea)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Mixed Up Movie Titles
Date: 28 Sep 92 03:40:51 GMT
Organization: ACME products - artillery division

st1ns@rosie.uh.edu (Ault, Russell W.) writes:

> And on a major artery near here, there's a paint store which lost an E from i
> sign for a while, going from DEVOE PAINT to DEVO PAINT.  I thought maybe they
> trying for a more modern image, but it was just a hardware failure.

Not! It was obviously the software that was driving the sign that was at
fault.


--
"A leopard never changes his stripes" 
           -- Al Gore, candidate for vice-president
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: thore@colargol (Thor Aage Eldby)
Subject: Re: wanted math jokes
Organization: Colargol, Trondheim College of Engineering
X-Newsreader: TIN [version 1.1 PL6]
Date: Wed, 30 Sep 1992 18:22:43 GMT

andersod@cnsvax.uwec.edu wrote:
: but s/he decided to go on.
: s/he tried eleven,   it's odd and it's prime.
: s/he tried thirteen, it's odd and it's prime.
: s/he stopped there, and concluded that all odd numbers are prime, 
: and nine is just a percent error in the study.
: STUFF DELETED

I like this version better.

How to prove that all odd numbers are primes.

The Mathematican says
---------------------
One is prime, three is prime, five is prime, seven is prime
The rest is solved by induction.

The Physician says
------------------
One is prime, three is prime, five is prime, seven is prime, 
nine is error of measurement, 11 is prime ......

The Engineer says
-----------------
One is prime, three is prime, five is prime, seven is prime,
nine is prime, 11 is prime .......

--
      ,---.___________        _         ============   .
    /' Thor Aage Eldby \     |  \        I_  O  _I_,==.:
   |   thore@edb.tih.no >----|===`------'I `---' I |  |:
   |   Klostergt.56 C11/    _ \          I       I |  |:'
   |   7000 Trondheim /    (   `-,-----============:__;:
   |  ,---.__________/    (_    O    __)       \_      :
   |/'                      (_______)          (_)      
Organization: Freshman, CIT general, Carnegie Mellon, Pittsburgh, PA
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Date: Fri,  2 Oct 1992 02:33:18 -0400 
From: "Bartosz M. Blacha" <bb2q+@andrew.cmu.edu>
Subject: test

test.













Hah-hah-hah, it's so damn funny!!!
Isn't it the best joke ever posted here?




(My .sig went out-of-order.  It was the one with Nietzsche.)

\
From: herm@coombs.anu.edu.au (Herman H. Fredriksson)
Subject: Re: cascades, and how to avoid them purple
Keywords: purple
Organization: Coombs Computing Unit, Australian National University, Canberra.
Date: Tue, 29 Sep 92 12:58:11 GMT

In article <rdippold.717739570@cancun> rdippold@cancun.qualcomm.com (Ron Dippold) writes:
>s7356911@deimos.ucc.umass.edu (DYLYN) writes:
>>Avoid cascades -- end all your lines with ``purple''!
>"Bug" won't rhyme, but do you think "burp"'ll?
Cant find a rhyme, why not ask Steve Urkle?

--
+---------------------------------------------------------------------+
|  Herman H. Fredriksson         email:    <herm@nitha.etsu.edu> USA  |
|  Things that make you go herm...      <herm@coombs.anu.edu.au> AUS  |
+---------------------------------------------------------------------+
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: cosc184z@menudo.uh.edu ((COSC148O) 92F00761)
Subject: Re: Bastard operator from hell - any more episodes?
Organization: University of Houston
Date: Tue, 6 Oct 1992 18:30:36 GMT

In article <1992Oct6.014244.15208@monu6.cc.monash.edu.au> s1073200@giaec.cc.monash.edu.au (***Paul Jackson**) writes:
>In article <175@elli.une.edu.au> gbrown@elli.une.edu.au (}) writes:
>>
>>Is there anymore episodes of the bastard operator from hell. Ive got up to
>>episode 11.
>>I havent laughed so hard in all my life!
>>To the author: PLEASE write some more!
>>
>>DISCLAIMER: all my own opinions.
>
>Hell, I only got up to episode 10, please post or mail 11, please, please
>please.
>
>Yes and to the Author, make more, they were so cool!!!!
>Thanks
>Paul

Moi aussi! (me too!)

-- 
  H  H   EEEE      K  K  U  U  EEEE  RRR   !! !!
  H  H   E         K K   U  U  E     R  R  !! !!      David Alten
  HHHH   EE        KK    U  U  EE    RRR   !! !!      cosc184z@menudo.uh.edu
  H  H   E         K K   U  U  E     R R              HE KUER!!
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: CENG51@maccvm.corp.mot.com (Craig Witkowski)
Subject: Re: Wanted: Native jokes
Organization: Motorola
Date: 4 Oct 1992 16:58:48 CDT

Q: Why did the Indian wear a jockstrap?
A: Totem Pole!

Q: Heard the one about the queer Indian?
A: He was a real brave sucker!
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: smilies
From: $ennsnr@brandonu.ca (Neil Enns)
Date: 29 Sep 92 17:51:05 CST
Organization: Brandon University

In article <25SEP199217000976@erich.triumf.ca>, music@erich.triumf.ca (FRED W. BACH) writes:
> In article <1992Sep23.130457.473@ultb.isc.rit.edu>, ebp4907@ultb.isc.rit.edu (E.B. Palmer) writes...
>> 
> 
>    [ a huge number of smilies omitted ]
> 
>    The CBC says these are now called "emoticons" which is a short form
>  of "emotion-evoking icons"  I think.  
> 
>    What does the net think about the word "emoticon" ?
> 
>  Fred W. Bach ,    Operations Group        |  Internet: music@erich.triumf.ca
>  TRIUMF (TRI-University Meson Facility)    |  Voice:  604-222-1047 loc 278/419
>  4004 WESBROOK MALL, UBC CAMPUS            |  FAX:    604-222-1074
>  University of British Columbia, Vancouver, B.C., CANADA   V6T 2A3
> 
>  These are my opinions, which should ONLY make you read, think, and question.
>  They do NOT necessarily reflect the views of my employer or fellow workers.

I personally find emoticon hard to pronounce. Smilies is a much more plesent
word, and it seems easier to type. And smilies is really what the :)'s are,
smilies! :)

-- 
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

    _/      _/  _/_/_/  _/  _/		Reading furnishes the mind only with 
   _/_/    _/  _/      _/  _/		materials of knowledge; it is thinking
  _/  _/  _/  _/_/    _/  _/		that makes what we read ours.
 _/    _/_/  _/      _/  _/			-- John Locke
_/      _/  _/_/_/  _/  _/_/_/		
					Neil Enns, Brandon University
Disclaimer: Huh?			Internet: $ennsnr@brandonU.ca

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
From: prem@prem.lbl.gov (Shirdi R. Prem)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: ggbj - urgent request!!!
Date: 30 Sep 1992 20:31:09 GMT
Organization: Lawrence Berkeley Laboratory
Reply-To: prem@prem.lbl.gov (Shirdi R. Prem)
NNTP-Posting-Host: prem.lbl.gov

In article <61140012@hpcvnb.CV.HP.COM> moursund@hpcvnb.CV.HP.COM (David_Moursund) writes:
>obviously, since there is no "real" GGBJ.
                           ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
	Oh yeah !! That's what _you_ think !!

	If this goes on for much longer, I guess I or one of the
	others who have the joke online will just have to post 
	the damn thing and get it over with........

	Ob-joke:
		Q: "How do I send my thesis to the laser printer?"
		A: "Just type rm -f *. That should do it."


Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: pi@bronze.ucs.indiana.edu (Raymond L. Gilbert)
Subject: Division between the sexes
Organization: Indiana University
Date: Sun, 4 Oct 1992 03:43:15 GMT

Seen recently on another group:

From: spp@zabriskie.berkeley.edu (Steve Pope)

>> I think what might help us guys is if you women would tell us 
>> what you're looking for.

> one very important thing that *I* look for is perception:  being 
> able to read my feelings

A slight paraphrase:

"I can't read your mind, so tell me what you want."

"I want you to be able to read my mind."

(original by Steve)

BTW, does anyone know how to forard this on to rec.humor.funny?  
I tried to mail it to funny@clarinet.com, but my server doesn't
recognize the node clarinet.com.  Any suggestions?  Or can
someone else forward it for me?  I'd appreciate E-mail replys,
as I do not have time to follow this group.  Thanks...

-- 
/----------------------------------------------------------------------------\
| Raymond L. Gilbert       | "...the present rule in computing the circle's  |
| pi@indiana.edu           |  area is entirely wrong..."                     |
| IUB Dept. of Physics     |  - Bill No. 246, Indiana State Legislature, 1897|
From: rimbo@ccwf.cc.utexas.edu
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: And now, singin' the blues...
Date: 28 Sep 92 21:43:25 GMT
Reply-To: rimbo@ccwf.cc.utexas.edu ()
Organization: The University of Texas at Austin, Austin TX
Originator: rimbo@louie.cc.utexas.edu

This is pretty much original, except the idea came from an actual problem
in my logic textbook:

*Note:#="for all" (universal, the upside-down A)
      ^="not" (negation)
      3="There exists some" (existential, the backwards E)


"Nobody knows all the trouble I've seen."

Or,
#x(Px -> ^#y((Ty & Siy) -> Kxy))
which means "for all x if x is a person then for not all y if y is trouble and
  I have seen y then x knows y"

and can also be said...
^3x(Px & #y((Ty & Siy) -> Kxy))
which means "there exists no x such that x is a person and for all y if y is
  trouble and I have seen y then x knows y."


Of course, the next line, "Nobody knows...but Jesus" is even more fun:
#x((Px & #y((Ty & Siy) -> Kxy)) -> Jx)
which reads "for all x, x is a person and for all y if y is trouble and I
  have seen y then x knows y only if x is Jesus."

Next week:  The logicians' gospel choir.
-rimbo@ccwf.cc.utexas.edu
From:  (lien@bucknell.edu (David Lien))
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Software Engineers
Date: 6 Oct 92 08:42:40 GMT
Organization: Bucknell University, Lewisburg, PA, USA
NNTP-Posting-Host: mace24.bucknell.edu


> 
> 
> There's a better one : an advert in a British newspaper for New Woman 
> magazine (a kind of soft-porn mag for females), for a DTP
> post.  Candidates must have "detailed knowledge of Quark XPress 3.0
> AND an above average interest in sex."

When I was at Michigan State University, I remember seeing an ad for 
a position at Beirut University that said something to the effect of 

.. we expect there to be a vacancy in the next few months for the position
of Dean of ...

At least they were thinking ahead!


David Lien
lien@bucknell.edu
Astronomer to the Stars - isn't that redundant?
From: st1ns@rosie.uh.edu (Ault, Russell W.)
Subject: Re: Mixed Up Movie Titles
Followup-To: rec.humor
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41    
Organization: University of Houston
Date: Sat, 26 Sep 1992 03:16:00 GMT

In article <25351@oasys.dt.navy.mil>, handle@oasys.dt.navy.mil (Robert Handleton) writes...
>Along the lines of store signs being modified by missing parts,
> 
>My mom used to buy seconds and irregulars for us kids to wear at a place
>near Philly (Ambler maybe) called Arty's Dry Goods.  But, the end pane
>of glass on which the name was painted had been replaced so that it
>read Arty's Dry Goo.
> 
>Well, it always cracked me up.
> 

I don't know if they still do it now that Jeff Dahmer's been in the news, but
up in Wisconsin the local urchinry used to delight in modifying (with flung rocks)
the signs of the Farm and Fleet stores so that they read as   "arm and F eet".

In a similar vein, I remember a joint whose neon sign seemed to develop continual 
failures in the letter "u" which changed the name from "DONUT STOP" to "DON T STOP".

And on a major artery near here, there's a paint store which lost an E from its
sign for a while, going from DEVOE PAINT to DEVO PAINT.  I thought maybe they were
trying for a more modern image, but it was just a hardware failure.
From: sauerm@ucbeh.san.uc.edu
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: <None>
Date: 5 Oct 92 20:05:19 EST
Distribution: world
Organization: Univ. of Cincinnati

I am so horny!!!!!


I am a single white female withlarge breasts please write me!!!!!!
From: duperval@ERE.UMontreal.CA (Duperval Laurent)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Military humor
Date: 29 Sep 92 19:24:42 GMT
Organization: Universite de Montreal

(I know nothing about army ranks and stuff.  This is just from memory so send
all napalm bombs to /dev/null.)

An American Marine commando is sent to Alaska for a one month stint in the cold.
Early one morning, the sargeant barges in on the sleeping soldiers and yells:

"All right!  Everybody up!  I want you all to go outside in the nude, in line.
I want you to be close enough to the man in front of you to make him smile.
Let's go!  Let's go!"

Three minutes later, all the men are forming a tight line in front of the
barracks.  All are naked, even though the temperature is below freezing. 
The sargeant comes out sporting a very comfy looking coat and holding a small
whip in his hand.  He smiles and says, "You may take a step back now."  And
the men do.

Walking up and down the line, the sargeant suddenly hits one of the soldiers
across the back.  Glaring at his he yells, "Soldier did that hurt?"

"No sir!"

"And why is that soldier?"

"Because I'm a Marine, sir!"

Satisfied, the sargeant spots another victim and slashes across his chest.
The sargeant bellows, "Soldier did that hurt?"

"No sir!"

"And why is that soldier?"

"Because I'm a Marine, sir!"

The sargeant keeps on inspecting the ranks and notices one soldier with a huge
erection.  Thinking nothing of it, he smashes the whip (actually, it's not a
whip.  It's one of those things Hitler used to walk around with.  It's called
a "cravache" in French but I don't know the English equivalent for it.  At any
rate, it doesn't cut the guy's dick off)... The sargeant smashes the whip on
the soldier's dick.  With foam at the corner of his mouth, the sargeant
screams, "Soldier did that hurt?"

"No sir!"

"And why is that soldier?"

"Because it wasn't mine, sir!"

-- 
Laurent Duperval          | The opinions expressed herein are my own and
                          | do not represent those of this establishment
duperval@ere.umontreal.ca | That's because they don't have enough $$$
duperval@jsp.umontreal.ca | to afford them.  Noone does.
From: mcsweinberg@memstvx1.memst.edu
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: something you'll never see...
Date: 28 Sep 92 12:13:21 -0600
Distribution: world
Organization: Memphis State University

In article <27321@nntp_server.ems.cdc.com>, ahummel@ems.cdc.com (H. Austin Hummel) writes:
> In article <1992Sep24.182259.7937@cs.rose-hulman.edu>, derry@NeXTwork.Rose-Hulman.Edu (John Derry) writes:
> |> 
> |>    
> |> 
> |>   Something you'll never see:
> |> 
> |> 
> |>              Michael  Jackson  shaking  hands  with  Madonna!
> 
> Not without a rubber glove!  B-}

reading this just brought this one to mind:

Amy Grant singing G.Micheals "I want your Sex"

Rai.
From: mye3349@cuphub.cup.edu
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Want MONTY PYTHON SCRIPTS
Date: 2 Oct 92 01:06:44 GMT
Organization: California University of Pennsylvania, California, PA

Hello out there Python fans

		If anybody out there has any scripts for monty pythons movies
or the flying circus skits, please send them out.  I am being deprived of 
monty python at school and in need of python, especially The search for the
Holy Grail.
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: draper@ais.org (Patrick Draper)
Subject: Re: Airplane! script
Organization: UMCC
Date: Mon, 28 Sep 1992 00:54:12 GMT

In article <1992Sep27.235911.11105@hubcap.clemson.edu> conradv@eng.clemson.edu writes:
>In article 1LuRRB1w164w@phsbbs.princeton.nj.us, tony@phsbbs.princeton.nj.us (Anthony Foglia) writes:
>----------------------------------------------------------------------------
>>
>>Can I get a copy too?
>>
>
>
>May I have one too? 
>
>---
>
>
>" All that is required for evil to triumph is that good men do nothing"
>						            Edmund Burke
>
>

Me three!


------------------////////////////////\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\------------------
| Patrick Draper           Disclaimer:  I can't control my fingers,        |
| draper@umcc.ais.org                   I can't control my toes! - Ramones |
| University of Michigan Computer Club                                     |
NO CARRIER                     We are a nation of laws, not people         |
------------------\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\////////////////////------------------
From: bobp@cherise.UUCP (Robert Parkinson)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Military humor
Date: 27 Sep 92 18:40:53 GMT
Reply-To: bobp@sandr.com (Robert Parkinson)
Organization: S&R Software, Incorporated

In article <zarthac.717408556@camelot> excalibr@camelot.bradley.edu (Michael Burke) writes:
>Anywayz, I'm looking for others to add to my list:
>
>Navy:	A bucket of Prop Wash (could also be applied to the AF)
>	A box of Grid Squares (could also be applied to the Army)

50 feet of shore line.
A gallon of relative bearing grease.

Xref: sparky rec.humor:29932 alt.fan.monty-python:7211
From: sprooney@unix1.tcd.ie (Simon Rooney)
Newsgroups: rec.humor,alt.fan.monty-python
Subject: Re: dead president sketch
Date: 29 Sep 92 21:01:33 GMT
Organization: Trinity College, Dublin

This is an ex-sketch.

IOSnm

(ncie)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: dgreen@jarthur.claremont.edu (David Green)
Subject: Re: cascades, and how to avoid them purple
Organization: Harvey Mudd College, Claremont, CA 91711
Date: Thu, 1 Oct 1992 19:44:49 GMT

>Try ending a line in ORANGE!
Do that during which porange?
-- 
dgreen@jarthur.claremont.edu				   David "Mishael" Green
		    Have you scritched your local Furry today?
***********************Who ordered the muon? -- I. I. Rabi**********************
	    Unix and the world Unix with you; VAX and you VAX alone.
From: vander@flab.fujitsu.co.jp (Mike van der Velden)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Palindrome
Date: 5 Oct 92 11:16:26 GMT
Organization: Fujitsu Laboratories Ltd., Kawasaki, Japan

A friend of mine sent me this one:

------------------

  A man, a plan, a caret, a ban, a myriad, a sum, a lac, a liar, a hoop, a
pint, a catalpa, a gas, an oil, a bird, a yell, a vat, a caw, a pax, a wag,
a tax, a nay, a ram, a cap, a yam, a gay, a tsar, a wall, a car, a luger, a
ward, a bin, a woman, a vassal, a wolf, a tuna, a nit, a pall, a fret, a
watt, a bay, a daub, a tan, a cab, a datum, a gall, a hat, a fag, a zap, a
say, a jaw, a lay, a wet, a gallop, a tug, a trot, a trap, a tram, a torr, a
caper, a top, a tonk, a toll, a ball, a fair, a sax, a minim, a tenor, a
bass, a passer, a capital, a rut, an amen, a ted, a cabal, a tang, a sun, an
ass, a maw, a sag, a jam, a dam, a sub, a salt, an axon, a sail, an ad, a
wadi, a radian, a room, a rood, a rip, a tad, a pariah, a revel, a reel, a
reed, a pool, a plug, a pin, a peek, a parabola, a dog, a pat, a cud, a nu,
a fan, a pal, a rum, a nod, an eta, a lag, an eel, a batik, a mug, a mot, a
nap, a maxim, a mood, a leek, a grub, a gob, a gel, a drab, a citadel, a
total, a cedar, a tap, a gag, a rat, a manor, a bar, a gal, a cola, a pap, a
yaw, a tab, a raj, a gab, a nag, a pagan, a bag, a jar, a bat, a way, a
papa, a local, a gar, a baron, a mat, a rag, a gap, a tar, a decal, a tot, a
led, a tic, a bard, a leg, a bog, a burg, a keel, a doom, a mix, a map, an
atom, a gum, a kit, a baleen, a gala, a ten, a don, a mural, a pan, a faun,
a ducat, a pagoda, a lob, a rap, a keep, a nip, a gulp, a loop, a deer, a
leer, a lever, a hair, a pad, a tapir, a door, a moor, an aid, a raid, a
wad, an alias, an ox, an atlas, a bus, a madam, a jag, a saw, a mass, an
anus, a gnat, a lab, a cadet, an em, a natural, a tip, a caress, a pass, a
baronet, a minimax, a sari, a fall, a ballot, a knot, a pot, a rep, a
carrot, a mart, a part, a tort, a gut, a poll, a gateway, a law, a jay, a
sap, a zag, a fat, a hall, a gamut, a dab, a can, a tabu, a day, a batt, a
waterfall, a patina, a nut, a flow, a lass, a van, a mow, a nib, a draw, a
regular, a call, a war, a stay, a gam, a yap, a cam, a ray, an ax, a tag, a
wax, a paw, a cat, a valley, a drib, a lion, a saga, a plat, a catnip, a
pooh, a rail, a calamus, a dairyman, a bater, a canal--Panama.

                --Dan Hoey, 'discovered' in 1984.
 
--
Mike van der Velden
Distributed Systems Laboratory, Fujitsu Laboratories Ltd., Kawasaki, Japan
e-mail: vander@flab.fujitsu.co.jp

ps. If you send me a picture postcard      Mike van der Velden
    from your area to the address at       Fujitsu Unoki Dormitory, room 227
    right, I'll send you one from Tokyo.   2-17-18 Unoki, Ota-ku, Tokyo 146
    Postcards must be received by          Japan
    November 15, 1992
From: tma4@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu (TERRY MICHAEL AUSPITZ)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Fanning the Flames of Hate
Date: 5 Oct 92 18:55:00 GMT
Organization: Lehigh University

In article <1992Oct1.194933.15890@welchgate.welch.jhu.edu>, davidk@welch.jhu.edu
 (David Kitaguchi) writes:
>In article 1929@spectrum.xerox.com, eradm@brahms.Berkeley.EDU (Craig Shergold)
writes:
>>In article <1992Sep29.210250.1996@newstand.syr.edu>, hlow@rodan.acs.syr.edu (H
andel Low) writes:
>>>
>>>Cascades are stupid (don't you dare).
>>I suppose you think we really care!
>I read this and simply stare...
Can a tortoise really beat a hare?
-- 
+ - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - +
|         ///   ///    ///////                   -=FORTY-TWO=-              |
|        ///   ///   /////////           We *ARE* The meaning of life!      |
|       //////////  //   ///                                                |
|      //////////      ///                TMA4@LEHIGH.EDU - Terry           |
|           ///      ///                  SLR7@LEHIGH.EDU - Stephanie       |
|          ///     ////////               MRP2@LEHIGH.EDU - Matt            |
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: sbale@netcom.com (Swamy S. Bale)
Subject: Re: Scottish Jokes
Organization: Netcom - Online Communication Services  (408 241-9760 guest) 
Date: Wed, 30 Sep 1992 14:27:14 GMT

In article <92268.160026AWINTON@ESTEC.BITNET> <AWINTON@ESTEC.BITNET> writes:
> Anybody care to post some Scottish Jokes?  They may be about Scots or
>by Scots.  I'd appreiciate either form of joke.
>
>Alistair Winton (Nae Sassenach mesel')

Q. How did Grand Canyon formed?
A. A Scotsman dropped his penny into a small crack somewhere in Arizona.

Q. How did copper wire invented?
A. By two Scotsmen quarreling for a penny.
From: ree@utrcv1 (Bob Erickson)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Funny Names
Date: 30 Sep 92 02:17:00 GMT
Reply-To: ree@utrc.utc.com
Organization: United Technologies Research Center
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41

Here's a couple more: 

  I had a friend in elementary school whose last name was Bates.
    Young men are often referred to as 'Master' instead of 'Mister'.
    Guess what we called him (and how some mail was addressed!).

  I once worked for a man named Richard Shaker.
    We'd never dare call him ...

Apologies to both. I couldn't resist posting.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bob Erickson                                         #include <disclaimer.std>
From: ahummel@ems.cdc.com (H. Austin Hummel)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: something you'll never see...
Date: 25 Sep 92 12:24:18 GMT
Reply-To: you@ems.cdc.com
Organization: Empros Systems International, a division of CDC

In article <1992Sep24.182259.7937@cs.rose-hulman.edu>, derry@NeXTwork.Rose-Hulman.Edu (John Derry) writes:
|> 
|>    
|> 
|>   Something you'll never see:
|> 
|> 
|>              Michael  Jackson  shaking  hands  with  Madonna!

Not without a rubber glove!  B-}
Newsgroups: rec.humor