HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: das@emmapeel.ca.boeing.com (Deb Schwartz)
Subject: Re: Sex, the Final Frontier?
Organization: Yet Another Graphics Project, Bellevue, WA
Date: Mon, 4 Jan 1993 17:50:59 GMT

In article <C0B8pr.Ar9@usenet.ucs.indiana.edu> fulton@silver.ucs.indiana.edu (Ben Fulton) writes:
>In <1993Jan3.222420.25595@news.unomaha.edu> torsten@cwis.unomaha.edu (Torsten Wesley Adair) writes:
>
>>Has anyone written any sex novels involving the various Feline races of the 
>>Federation?  I would assume that some people would fantasize about this, 
>>although sex with a male cat can be quite painful/enjoyable (males have 
>>barbed members).
>
>Dunno, but look for Elf Sternberg's journal entries in alt.sex or 
>alt.sex.stories...
>
I love Elf's stories, and really wish he would publish them in book form.
They're available by ftp from: 

            128.2.209.227:~/pub/stories/journal_entries

Be forwarned, you don't want to read these if you're offended by sex between
anything but 2 humans of opposite genders.  

------
Debbie Schwartz // das@voodoo.ca.boeing.com  // ....uw-beaver!bcsaic!voodoo!das
  "I've never fallen in love, but I've stepped in it a few times." 
					 - from _Peter's Friends_
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
From: kutcha@eos.acm.rpi.edu (Phillip Rzewski)
Subject: Man pays for college with pinball
Organization: The Voice of Fate
Date: Sun, 10 Jan 1993 20:52:36 GMT


This one was told to me last night at a poker game. The guy who told it claims
it's true, but we know how that goes.

FOAF was in college when pinball cost $0.10 to play. The game he played gave
away free games every so often. It also turns out that the place where he
played had the following policy: if, when they closed, you had credits
built up on a pinball machine, they would give you a dime per credit (since
they had to kick you off).

By exploiting this, the guy could supposively make more money than he was
making at his regular job he was using to pay for college, so instead he just
played pinball this way and hence paid his way through college with it.

--
  Phillip Andrew Rzewski                      Internet: kutcha@acm.rpi.edu
             "Don't wait; while you're waiting, you're dying."
                          --- Peter Hammill
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
Subject: Re: scientology
From: system@codewks.nacjack.gen.nz (Wayne McDougall)
Date: Tue, 05 Jan 93 10:49:08 NZST
Organization: The Code Works Limited, PO Box 10 155, Auckland, New Zealand

> >>jmacphai@cue.bc.ca (James MacPhail) writes:
> >>
> >>>The best-seller part is no mystery. They just go out and buy their own boo
> >>>in sufficient quantity to hit the volume mark. (Then re-sell them, I guess
> >>
  [sorry, attribution deleted]
> >No honest publisher does it, but I have read magazine articles which state
> >that the Church of Scientology did exactly that to put L. Ron Hubbard's book
> >on best seller lists.  (Sound reasonable to me--I've read some of that tripe
>                          ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Yup I've heard that too, so it must be true.

I've also heard that its far more common for record companies to do this,
especially in New Zealand where only a small volume of sales can promote the
song up the chart, so it gets played a lot on the radio, so it becomes
popular, so it sells better, so....

I've also been told that ONLY records are included in the charts; tapes and
CDs are excluded, which suggests and increasingly biased chart. If this was
true, I would suspect only in New Zealand and other backward countries
(eg Australia, United Kingdom, etc)


-- 
  Wayne McDougall, BCNU
  This .sig unintentionally left blank.

Hello! I'm a .SIG Virus. Copy me and spread the fun.
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
From: cardo@oahu.cs.ucla.edu (Ric Crabbe)
Subject: Re: No US President Ever Survived an Energy Crisis
Organization: UCLA, Computer Science Department
Date: Fri, 8 Jan 93 19:51:16 GMT

masticol@cadenza.rutgers.edu (Steve Masticola) writes:

>An interesting fact for y'all:

>No U.S. president who had an energy crisis on his watch has ever made
>it through the end of a second term.

>Nixon:	First Energy Crisis, 1973. 	Forced to resign, 1974.
...because he was caught asking people to steal for him.
>Carter:	Second Energy Crisis, 1979. 	Defeated for second term, 1980.
...because he was an all around loser.
>Bush:	Third Energy Crisis, 1990. 	Defeated for second term, 1992.
...because he couldn't shift the blame for the economy to the congress.
>This should suggest something to somebody...
yeah, we have too many energy crises.
>- Steve (masticol@cs.rutgers.edu).
ric
-- 
C.S. Grad Student/Stand-Up Philosopher
cardo@cs.ucla.edu
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
From: bam@Bang.UUCP (Bret A. Marquis)
Subject: Re: Computer theft
Reply-To: bam%bang@trout.nosc.mil
Organization: Marquis Property Development Co., San Diego
X-Newsreader: TIN [version 1.1 PL6]
Date: Fri, 8 Jan 1993 04:02:36 GMT

Brian Leibowitz (bml@netcom.com) wrote:
: I heard this story many years ago and was wondering if it really happened.
: 
: A programmer at a bank changed the interest calculations on accounts
: to round down instead of rounding to the nearest penny.  All the fractions
: of pennies were put in a dummy account and then withdrawn.  The bank did
: not notice for a while because the amount of interest paid was still correct
: and the books balanced.

San Diego Trust & Savings Bank about 10 years ago.   The programmer
transfered most of his profits electronically to Switzerland, bought
diamonds in the Soviet Union, then for some unexplainable reason,
returned to San Diego where he was arrested with the diamonds.

One of the local departments stores was advertising the diamonds and
using the notoriety of their origin in their ads.

There was also a rumor that the bank profited handsomely from the sale
of the diamonds but I have no details about that part.

I believe that one of the Superman movies used this trick.


Bret Marquis
bam@trout.nosc.mil
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban,rec.arts.startrek.misc
From: PAPAI@kcgl1.eng.ohio-state.edu (Jonathan Papai)
Subject: Re: The canonical Star Trek plot
Organization: The Ohio State University
Date: Wed, 13 Jan 1993 04:38:26 GMT

thf2@ellis.uchicago.edu (Ted Frank) writes:
>In article <1993Jan12.103341.3502@ms.uky.edu> fehr@ms.uky.edu (Jeff Davis) writes:
>>Why have Star Trek threads started to appear less and less as strays
>>and guest stars and more and more as regulars in a.f.u.?
>
>I agree.  One would think that there would be more posts and newsgroups
>devoted to Battlestar Galactica, which was a clearly superior television
>series to any of the Star Trek series or movies.

Clearly B.G. had much better FX than Star Trek, though Star
Trek's title graphics have probably never been equaled.  BG
didn't seem to be a slave to the politics of the day, the
flower children and such on ST:TOS and the rampant PC of
ST:TNG.  All in all, I hope Babylon 5 can measure up to
Battlestar Galactica.

I hope that Spock guy quits recommending collard greens as a
substitute for milk to get enough calcium.  He gives Vulcans
a bad name.

Oh, btw, did they ever say what Jim Kirks' middle name is?

J.P.   "I think of this program as quite important.
        It is you I find Frivolous" J.T. Kirk, Trouble with Tribbles
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
From: dannyb@panix.com (Daniel Burstein)
Subject: Re: Mother Lifts Car Off Child. Uh huh.
Date: Tue, 5 Jan 1993 08:00:47 GMT
Organization: Panix, NYC

(sorry, couldn't resist posting my comments at the end of this) -db

In <NDFXwB5w165w@codewks.nacjack.gen.nz> system@codewks.nacjack.gen.nz (Wayne McDougall) writes:

>twcaps@tennyson.lbl.gov (Terry Chan) writes:

>> Terry "I've said it a million times, never exaggerate" Chan

>I can say "I've said it a million times, never exaggerate" in a confortable
>four seconds at ordinary talking speed. To say that phrase a million times
>consecutive would take 7 weeks 4 days 7 hours 6 minutes 40 seconds.

>If (as my mother claims) you say it at least ten times a day, it would
>take 274 years to say it a million times.

>And of course, it takes longer to say

>"I've said it nine hundred and ninety-nine thousand nine hundred and ninety-
>nine times, never exaggerate".

>Unfortunately, when I explained this to my mother, she decided I was being
>cheeky. I got my billionth spanking.


>Wayne "of course in 1650 years time you'll have more time per day to say it" 
>McDougall

>-- 
>  Wayne McDougall, BCNU
>  This .sig unintentionally left blank.

>Hello! I'm a .SIG Virus. Copy me and spread the fun.

but, since the Earth's rotation is slowing down at ?a second/day/century?
(something, I guess, to post to sci.space), then in umptity umptity years
you will be able to say it a million times/day.

(hmm, takes roughly 1/2 sec to say "it", so in how many years will you
able to say "it" a million times in one day?)

danny ("a billion here, a billion there" -Everett Dirkson) Burstein

dannyb@panix.com

Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
From: andyh@syma.sussex.ac.uk (Andy Holyer)
Subject: Re: Doggone (was: Ring in the New Year with Some FAQs
Organization: University of Sussex
Date: Wed, 6 Jan 1993 15:18:08 GMT

In article <BVFXwB7w165w@unkaphaed.gbdata.com> popec@unkaphaed.gbdata.com (William C. Barwell) writes:
(About the "mine dogs" story)
>
>I remember reading this story years ago, but I forget the source.
>I do recall that the Russians had supposedly trained dogs to run under
>German tanks and stay there until the explosives went off.  Unfortunately
>the dogs never did learn to distinguish between German and Russian tanks
>so the experiment was called off.  So went the story i read.  Not sure I
>believe it.
No, no! the point is that the dogs *could* distinguish between German and
Russian tanks, and hence refused to have anything to do with German ones....

ObUL: Has the story about the man who died when he was resting on the end of
a broom, and slipped, so the bromm handle went... well, where gerbils fear to
tread....
It was doing the rounds a few weeks ago. Claimed to have happened in
Eastbourne (about 15 miles away). I have been unable to trace any
corroboration, so it looks like a live one guys. Was in the Daily Mirror, if
that helps at all....

Andy "Well, my cat's called Megabyte" Holyer
-- 
&ndy Holyer, School of Cognitive and     |"In the beginning, there was
Computing Studies, University of Sussex, |  nothing, which exploded."
JANET: andyh@cogs.sussex.ac.uk           |   - Terry Pratchett
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban,rec.sport.baseball
From: cmk@athena.mit.edu (Charles M Kozierok)
Subject: Re: Babe Ruth Candy Bar
Organization: Massachusetts Institute of Technology
Date: Fri, 8 Jan 1993 04:58:46 GMT

In article <C0In0o.409@uxa.ecn.bgu.edu> cscdc@uxa.ecn.bgu.edu (Dan Carpenter) writes:
>In article <1993Jan8.001923.15230@athena.mit.edu> cmk@athena.mit.edu (Charles M Kozierok) writes:
>>>My vote is that Jerome Holtzman's just plain stupid.
>>
>>i believe you have chosen wisely.
>
>Wrong!
>
>>i am pretty sure that the bar is indeed not named for George Herman.
>                                                       ^^^^^^^^^^^^^
>Hello.  HELLO! Is any one at home?!  

if you're knocking, i hope not.

>
>	George Herman "Babe" Ruth.   
>
>Do you have it now?

duh.
thanks for the clarification. i'm eternally grateful.

>Dan

i don't mind being wrong (though i'm not convinced i am in this case).
i don't mind being corrected when i am wrong (or even when someone thinks i am).

i do mind being abused.
and i did nothing to deserve your being rude.
so go screw yourself.

>>i heard this somewhere in the media not long ago, but i forget the source.
>
>Clean your ears.

clean up your act.

--
charles
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
Subject: Re: One more for the FAQ
From: derek@nezsdc.icl.co.nz (Derek Tearne)
Date: Wed, 6 Jan 93 03:37:29 GMT
Organization: Fujitsu New Zealand

In article <C0EEH2.G0y@math.uwaterloo.ca> alopez-o@neumann.uwaterloo.ca (Alex Lopez-Ortiz) writes:
>
>Add to the science section of the FAQ
>
>F. 10% of the population are homosexuals.
>   [The origin of the figure is a missaplication of a 1930's study]
>
>
>Recent studies say 3-5% of men are homosexuals, and about half as many 
>for women.

Other recent studies show that 10 percent of Males in London have had some 
form of Homosexual encounter (New Scientist after Nature - sometime in 1992).

Derek "90 percentile man" Tearne


-- 
Derek Tearne.   --   derek@nezsdc.icl.co.nz   --    Fujitsu New Zealand   -- 
 _______
 _______} This is a Usenet condom<tm>.  Roll the condom over the .signature 
	  file before posting to protect yourself from .sig retro-virii
From: tjc50@juts.ccc.amdahl.com (Terry Carroll)
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
Subject: Re: Touching Tongue Cold
Date: 6 Jan 93 01:55:33 GMT
Reply-To: tjc50@juts.ccc.amdahl.com (Terry Carroll)
Organization: Amdahl Corporation

In article <1993Jan05.022029.21897@microsoft.com>, richha@microsoft.com 
(Richard Harrington) writes:
> There was a story in the news a couple of weeks ago about
> a young (3y.o. I think) Eskimo boy who got his tongue stuck
> on a stair railing.  His quick thinking father urinated
> on the railing to get the kid unstuck.

And then he was electrocuted, right?

Terry Carroll - tjc50@juts.ccc.amdahl.com - 408/992-2152
The opinions presented above are not necessarily those of a sound mind.
From: starfish@stein.u.washington.edu (Sarah Skovronsky)
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
Subject: Re: Amusing Street Names
Date: 8 Jan 1993 01:48:06 GMT
Organization: University of Washington
NNTP-Posting-Host: stein.u.washington.edu

PAPAI@kcgl1.eng.ohio-state.edu (Jonathan Papai) writes:

>ObUL:El Paso, Texas (AP)- A man found out he had accidentally fed
>marijuana to his pet rabbits after flagging down a police officer to
>say the animals were sick.

[rest of high bunnies story deleted]

Now, this one MUST be true--I heard it on the RADIO. (Har har.)  I actually
did hear this one on KIRO Newsradio here in Seattle.  From the same guys
who made up some EXTREMELY funny parodies of the "That's what it is!"
commercial.  ("Hey!  You're not trying to trick me into speaking SPANISH,
are you?")

>ObUL2: Ever since I can remember, when the state finds a field of
>marijuana and confiscates, they estimate $1000 per plant as street
>value, no matter what the plant size, growing location or whatnot.
>This has been going on here for at least 15 years.

Sarah "Wow!  Spanish is easy!" Skovronsky
B
B

-- 
************************************************************************
*            Sarah Skovronsky     starfish@u.washington.edu            *
*                   667--The Neighbor of the Beast!                    *
**********fnord!********furrfu!********hi-keeba!********meep!***********
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
From: jlpicard@austin.ibm.com (Craig Becker)
Subject: Flammable Cars (Was: Re: Mother Lifts Car Off Child. Uh huh.)
Originator: jlpicard@woofer.austin.ibm.com
Date: Tue, 5 Jan 1993 15:41:30 GMT
Reply-To: jlpicard@austin.ibm.com
Organization: IBM Object Technology Products


joltes@husc10.harvard.edu (Richard Joltes) writes:
> billn@hpcvaac.cv.hp.com (bill nelson) writes:
> 
> >pynq@quads.uchicago.edu (Jeremy Mathers) writes:
> >: 
> >: I thought cars only burst into flames on TV.  Isn't it just a UL?
> >
> >No - it actually does happen once in a while.  It is not a common
> >occurance.

I read "somewhere" that cars involved in accidents catch fire in about
0.5% of all accidents.

> Yes.  Several years ago the "Nice Old Lady Across the Street" from my former
> residence locked her keys in her idling Ford, then called the fire department
> to come and SlimJim it open.  The nice firefighters did so, and just as they
> opened the door there was a loud "FWOOOOSHHHH" and the entire car went up in
> flames due to a fuel leak near the manifold.  Sloppy luck, if you ask me...

Was it a Ford Escort? I read in Consumer Reports that one year's model [87?] 
of the Escort had a faulty something-or-other that would cause the engine to
catch fire if the car idled for more than 10 minutes or so. Apparently, some
car dealership in northern Virginia had a lot full of Escorts and, in an effort
to keep the batteries charged, started them all up, resulting in about 20 of 
them catching fire. (I rather enjoy the image of a bunch of car salespersons
running about desperately, waving their arms in the air, going "Fire! Fire!"
:-)

Craig
-- 
-- "You will have the tallest,    Craig Becker, Object Technology Products --
--  darkest leading man in               Internet: jlpicard@austin.ibm.com --
--  Hollywood."                     IBM TR: jlpicard@woofer.austin.ibm.com --
--   - Merian C. Cooper to Fay Wray               VNET: JLPICARD at AUSVM1 --
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
From: flaps@dgp.toronto.edu (Alan J Rosenthal)
Subject: Jesus' name (was Re: Late breaking potential UL!)
Date: 8 Jan 93 23:09:35 GMT

PAPAI@kcgl1.eng.ohio-state.edu (Jonathan Papai) writes:
>I've heard:
>
>1) Jesus H. Christ
>2) Jesus Q. Christ
>3) Jesus F***ing Christ
>?

Temporarily assuming something which is most likely false, namely that you are
asking in seriousness, Jesus' name was simply "Jesus", or if you prefer "Jesus
of Nazareth".  "Christ" means saviour or something to that effect, it is not a
name.  The "H" is a joke.  "Fuck" is an expletive.

OB fact: The correct way to spell the possessive of a name in English which
ends in an "s" is to append an apostrophe-s, UNLESS the namee is allegedly a
god, in which case you just append an apostrophe.  Names I know of in this
category are Jesus and Zeus.  I personally would still pronounce the word
"Jesus'" as "jesuses".
From: barth@cbnewsd.cb.att.com (barth.richards)
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
Subject: Re: enterprise vs. love boat
Date: 11 Jan 93 22:55:11 GMT
Organization: AT&T


In article <1993Jan8.204144.1378@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu> PAPAI@kcgl1.eng.ohio-state.edu (Jonathan Papai) writes:

>I got to thinking the other day about the amazing similarities
>between Star Trek: The Next Generation and the Love Boat.
>This has to be more than just coincidence.
>
>_Category_                             _ST:TNG_        _Love Boat_

  [...]

>Black guy                              Bartender       LaForge


I'm gussing you meant:

>Black guy                              LaForge         Bartender


Actually, if you think about it, there's a closer parallel than that:


_Category_                              _ST:TNG_        _Love Boat_

Black Bartender                         LaForge         Gynan (or however
                                                        you spell the name
                                                        of Whoopi Goldberg's
                                                        character)

-- 
8888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888
88  Barth Richards                  "Language is a virus from outer space."  88
88  att!ihlpf!barth                           - William S. Burroughs         88
8888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888
From: hayes@ultra.com (John Hayes)
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
Subject: Re: The flywheel on the jeep goes round and round
Date: 5 Jan 93 21:15:14 GMT
Organization: Ultra Network Technologies

In <726210230snx@sgml.com> brian@sgml.com (Brian E. Travis) writes:

>When I was in high school, a friend told me a story about a 
>friend's (FOAF) jeep. It seems the FOAF was tooling around the 
>desert in his jeep (or generic equivalent). The vehicle had a 
>three-speed column-mounted shifter. First gear was up and 
>forward, second was down and forward, third was up and back, and 
>reverse was below that.

Thats a bit different from normal.  Looking at the column from the
side, the standard pattern is this:

	R	2
	|	|
	+---N---+
	|	|
	1	3

How else can you do the first-to-reverse rock when you're stuck in
the mud/snow?

>The event in question allegedly happened when the friend was 
>cruising along in third gear. He put his foot on the clutch to 
>coast and then hit a bump. This caused the gear shifter to fall 
>silently down into reverse.

>Ignorant about the change in gears, the driver released the 
>clutch at this high speed, and the jeep made a terrible noise, 
>followed by the flywheel making its way through the transmission 
>and hood and going "three hundred feet" into the air.

I can see the clutch disk taking a beating here, but not the flywheel.
Besides, the flywheel would probably come through the floor, not the
hood, it's mounted too far back for that.

>Having no experience with column-mounted shifters, I imagine it 
>would have to have some mondo synchromesh to achieve such an 
>effect.

For all of the three-speed manual trannys I know of, reverse is NEVER
synchronized.  That's why you can occasionally grind the gears a bit
when standing still trying to put it into reverse.

Interesting story though. :-)

Later...

John.
-- 
John Wm. Hayes 						hayes@ultra.com  
Ultra Network Technologies				(408)922-0100 x202
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban,alt.religion.kibology
From: kibo@world.std.com (James "Kibo" Parry)
Subject: Re: Bugger it
Organization: Two rooms filled with typography, in downtown Boston
Date: Fri, 8 Jan 1993 18:35:05 GMT

In article <JsV3wB1w165w@codewks.nacjack.gen.nz> system@codewks.nacjack.gen.nz (Wayne McDougall) writes:
>
>Sorry to introduce some facts into this newsgroup, but
>
>1. It was I who asked for evidence of the statement that was "100% scientific
>truth".
>2. Some American then thought that his scanner wasn't currently bugged, even
>though Kibo hand't rearranged his diodes.

My diodes or his?

					-- K.

(Xibo likes to say "My diodes or yours, sailor?")
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
From: pynq@quads.uchicago.edu (Jeremy Mathers)
Subject: Re: One more for the FAQ
Reply-To: pynq@midway.uchicago.edu
Organization: D. J. Dougherty & Associates
Date: Wed, 6 Jan 1993 15:20:39 GMT

In article <1993Jan6.033729.26161@nezsdc.icl.co.nz> derek@nezsdc.icl.co.nz (Derek Tearne) writes:
...
>>F. 10% of the population are homosexuals.
>>   [The origin of the figure is a missaplication of a 1930's study]
...
>>Recent studies say 3-5% of men are homosexuals, and about half as many 
>>for women.
...
>Other recent studies show that 10 percent of Males in London have had some 
>form of Homosexual encounter (New Scientist after Nature - sometime in 1992).

I would like to see a survey/number for the percentage of people who
care about (& another number for the %age who live/breath/sleep it) the
%age of the pop that is homo/gay/whatever you want to call it (love those
"x/y/z" expressions...!)

This ranks right up there with Trek as a net obsession not shared by the
general public.  Many people defend the obsession on public health
grounds (I.e., the "A" word), but we know what's really going on.

************************************************************************
The Zapruder film was a snuff film.

	- pynq@quads.uchicago.edu, who is still costing the net
	  hundreds, if not thousands, of dollars, every time he posts -
************************************************************************
Xref: sparky alt.folklore.urban:33329 rec.arts.startrek.misc:13556