HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: keulen@possum.csu.murdoch.edu.au (Mike van Keulen)
Subject: Re: BAH! HUMBUG! (was Re: Christmas is busting out all over!)
Organization: Murdoch University
Date:  1 Oct 92 03:59:00 GMT

JBrandt@AAA.UOregon.EDU (Jay Brandt (Jason)) writes:

><Jason looks up from the screen of his powerbook, and chuckles.>

>Hey Splash!! What's the matter? It was just a bit of -base- humor, right?
>Or was that two bytes? Well, I guess that's my two bytes worth on this
>topic.

The air in the bar begins to cloud as more peanuts are thrown, this time at
Jason (Thanks for the support Thyra).  Any more base-humourists?  There's
peanuts a plenty  :-)

Splash!

--
***************************** Michael van Keulen *************************** 
* Snail: School of BES - Biology         e-mail: keulen@murdoch.edu.au     *
*        Murdoch University              phone:  ++ 61 (09) 360-2843 (work)*
*        Murdoch WA 6150  AUSTRALIA              ++ 61 (09) 417-3902 (home)*
*************************** "To Love is to _LIVE_!" ************************
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: sjg@terminator.cc.umich.edu (Susan Gavula)
Subject: Perfect Caramel Apples
Organization: University of Michigan
Date: Mon, 5 Oct 1992 17:09:36 GMT


li@inigo.data-io.com writes:

>He then wanders back out into the taproom, deposits the wax paper into
>VAX's amazing suction hose, and goes over to Susan and hands her one of the
>apples.  There is *just* enough stick to make the hand off simple.

>"Your wish is my command..." David says with a laugh.

Susan just stares at him with wide eyes as she watches the process.  Then she
starts blushing and laughing.  "Perfectionists...I forgot just who I was dealing
with, dearheart.  I s'pose it doesn't do any good to say you didn't *have* to go
to all that trouble....but thanks muchly."  She gives him a kiss on the cheek as
he hands her the apple.  It takes her a moment to grasp it but David waits until
she has it securely before letting go.  She takes a small bite, savoring the
sweetness of the caramel along with the tart fruit.  "Wonderful..."

Before David can take a bite of his own apple Susan asks, "Want to share mine
first?"

Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: rowanf@crc.ricoh.com (Rowan Fairgrove)
Subject: Re: Christmas is busting out all over!
Reply-To: rowanf@crc.ricoh.com (Rowan Fairgrove)
Organization: RICOH California Research Center
Date: Tue, 29 Sep 92 14:42:45 GMT

Gypsy looks up from her home desk where computer
disks have been shoved aside and the acrylic paints and
craft materials are spread wide.  She smiles and virtually
merges her desk with Grant's table.  She admires his
stamps and shows him some of her own.  The Yuletide
frenzy hit me this weekend too.  I am making presents.
I just painted a Ukrainian-style Goddess plaque for a dear
friend.  I am just about to try my hand at Celtic knotwork
around the edge of a tray.  

Hey, is there anyone else who would like to join us?

For those of you who feel it is too early to be planning for
Yule, I also have my pumpkin carving kit and lots of
patterns.  Amaze your friends and neighbors with your
artful designs!  

Rowan (Gypsy Woman)
(closet craftswoman)

Rowan Fairgrove
From: olson@husc9.Harvard.EDU (Charles Olson)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Pet cats
Date: 29 Sep 92 00:59:16 GMT
 <OLSON.92Sep27224049@husc8.harvard.edu> <BvAJHo.F76@news.cso.uiuc.edu> <1992Sep28.203423.15919@husc3.harvard.edu>
Organization: Spam-On-A-Rope Inc.

In article <1992Sep28.203423.15919@husc3.harvard.edu>, olson@husc9.Harvard.EDU (Charles Olson) writes:
|> 
|> -- 
|> -Chip Olson. | olson@husc.harvard.edu | ceo@{gnu.ai,silver.lcs}.mit.edu 
|> "I get drunk, drinking Guinness with Creme de Menthe in it. It's really
|> bad for you."  -Shane MacGowan.
|> 
|> In article <BvAJHo.F76@news.cso.uiuc.edu>, trumpins@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu (Barbara Trumpinski) writes:
|> 
|> |> >the housemates had a marijuana patch in the *front* yard (this particular
|> |> >housemate was a few French fries short of a Happy Meal).  One day Suzanne
|> |>                ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
|> |> 
|> |> "i love this," squeals kitten..."can i steal it?????"
|> 
|> "Feel free, since it's not mine in the first place" replies Castellan.
|> "I have a file somewhere of a couple hundred similar insults... I'll
|> send it your way once I find it."
|> 


Hey, how'd my .sig get up THERE?  Get down here where you belong!!

-- 
-Chip Olson. | olson@husc.harvard.edu | ceo@{gnu.ai,silver.lcs}.mit.edu 
"I get drunk, drinking Guinness with Creme de Menthe in it. It's really
bad for you."  -Shane MacGowan.
From: jpalmer@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu (John D Palmer)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Unbeliever?
Date: 2 Oct 92 21:53:31 GMT
Organization: The Ohio State University


   One important point in the thread about unbeliever and StM is that in the 
Chronicles of Thomas Covenant, the main character MUST NOT for his own sake, 
believe what is happening is real. . . he is a leper, and a leper either 
accepts that leprosy is his entire life, or dies.  In this 'land', he is cured 
of leprosy.

     He is also a rapist, and *I* sure can't see any way to excuse the rape 
that happened. . . he was NOT being 'teased', even.  The first two books are a 
listing of Covenant's attempts to avoid the demands of the land by making other
peiople play the role of hero.

     If StM thought that Unbelieiver was idolizing this type of behavior, he 
would be right to be concerned.  Knowing unbeliever, I know that this is not 
true.
                                                John
-- 
"Love is cool; I mean, like, really cool.  Like, the coolest thing in
the universe, where, like, people open up inside and show the world how
they feel, and they ain't afraid someone's gonna laugh because they, like,
love themselves already!"  --Personality 42, a generic 60's philosopher
From: lydick@SOL1.GPS.CALTECH.EDU (Speaker-to-Minerals)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: BAH! HUMBUG! (was Re: Christmas is busting out all over!)
Date: 29 Sep 92 16:46:37 GMT
Reply-To: lydick@SOL1.GPS.CALTECH.EDU
Organization: HST Wide Field/Planetary Camera
NNTP-Posting-Host: sol1.gps.caltech.edu

In article <6470@blue.cis.pitt.edu.UUCP>, seawasp@vm2.cis.pitt.edu (Sea Scrooge) writes:
>	"I can't STAND it! I almost screamed when I saw the TV ad for
>the Shuttlecraft ornament... in September! AUUUGGGGHHH!

StM points out, "But, SeaWasp, Christmas is only about a month away."

"After all, 31 oct = 25 dec."
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: ptd2@po.CWRU.Edu (Palmer T. Davis)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: The Further Adventures of C-Hawk
Date: 3 Oct 1992 03:10:31 GMT
Organization: Case Western Reserve University, Cleveland, OH (USA)
Reply-To: ptd2@po.CWRU.Edu (Palmer T. Davis)
NNTP-Posting-Host: thor.ins.cwru.edu


C-Hawk, staring down the barrel of a loaded shotgun, replies, ``Umm,
well, actually, no.  You told me never to bring the _Sea_Hawk_ back
in here, and I haven't.  Besides, most of the starboard wing assembly
got shot away in a fight a little while back, so it'll take a major
overhaul before she ever flies again.''  He hands Mike a clipboard.
``I only managed to get my hands on one case of D'jili Reserve, but
everything else on your list is in the hold.''  C-Hawk sighs.  ``It's
too bad about the _Hawk_.  Now I'll have to haul the _Sea_Cat_ out of
storage and go after the guys who did it.''  Turning around, he 
continues, ``Does anyone know a good cheap source for type-IV dro--
Hey!  Where is everybody?''

``Outside,'' Mike replies.  ``Didi and company are throwing Liralen a
birthday party.  I just ducked inside to grab a few things meself.''

``Oh, geez.  It's Liralen's birthday.  I forgot.  And I didn't make it
back in time for Toothpick's day, either.  Tell you what: I'll finish
unloading your booze, run out to pick up a little something for Toothpick
and Liralen, and meet you outside.''

``Sounds fair,'' Mike replies, on his way out the door....

-- 
Palmer T. Davis      ___
<ptd2@po.cwru.edu>   \X/   cthread.  cthread_fork().  Fork, thread, fork!
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: lydick@SOL1.GPS.CALTECH.EDU (Speaker-to-Minerals)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: RE: Coming in for a landing, ArchTeryx!
Date: 4 Oct 1992 19:21:02 GMT
Organization: HST Wide Field/Planetary Camera
Reply-To: lydick@SOL1.GPS.CALTECH.EDU
NNTP-Posting-Host: sol1.gps.caltech.edu

In article <BvLx25.7r0@agora.rain.com>, feath@agora.rain.com (Feather) writes:
=Feather is having fun, having surprised ArchTeryx with her use of his beak
=for a landing-place.  ArchTeryx has asked "What can I do you for?"
=Feather ruffles her feathers and considers the question a bit.
=
=Well, I do enjoy this grand tradition of Callahaners always buying drinks
=for each other.  Would you mind buying me something?  Could I order a
=Brandy Alexander and put it on your bill?"
=
=Feather happily anticipates a taste of her favorite drink...

But does she anticipate the barrage of peanuts (sorry, ArchTeryx) that head her
direction in response to that pun?  Can her newly acquired telekinetic
abilities protect her?
From: HDKD@MUSICB.MCGILL.CA (HDKD)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: one more incarnation II
Date: 7 Oct 92 00:58:39 GMT
Organization: McGill University

After a few seconds, Rider Suddenly remembers something...
(Besides why he HATTTES so much tthose CRUMMY ERMINAL, heee
TERMINALS at school!!!!)

He runsback tohis Deck,done tthe mirrorshades and attttach the
optttticcabletto tthem, then sttart punching a few commands...

2 roses start to matterialise. MR then go sees mike, wich hands
him a bigbowl ofcream...

"Kittten, please excuse me for having forgetten tto salutte you
earlier... Pleaseaccepthisbowl of cream (and the HELL I'm having
from posting this directtlyon a tterminal instead of my RL Deck!)"

he hen continues ttomeet them all...

Serge Ayotte

-----------------------------------------------------------------------
|                   Montreal, Quebec, Canada                          |
| McGill University account: hdkd@musicb.mcgill.ca or b7qs at same    |
| Personel account         : rider@geloser.login.qc.ca                |
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: ajm@wag.caltech.edu (Abner J. Mintz)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: schools re: Old Coots Test
Date: 30 Sep 1992 00:02:39 GMT
Organization: California Institute of Technology, Pasadena, CA
NNTP-Posting-Host: monet.wag.caltech.edu

The Mighty and Powerful Sea Wasp writes:
>
>>The teachers at my high school used to label us by our class - Freshman 
>>[or as one I-want-to-kill-her teacher always said: Frosh] <agonized
>
>	"Was it just your teacher who said that? Frosh was the standard
>term used by students where I came from -- especially by anyone who
>wasn't frosh."

Gee, we always referred to them as anklebiters.  And noticed the tendency of
anklebiters to form into benzene, naphalene, anthracene, etc. rings in the
hallway, totally blocking traffic in both directions ...

*confused expression*  BTW, 'The Mighty and Powerful Sea Wasp'?  I just got
a vision of a muscular jellyfish lifting weights and wrestling octopi...
=8)
From: ajm@wag.caltech.edu (Abner J. Mintz)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: ANOTHER MIA LIST
Date: 30 Sep 1992 23:30:52 GMT
Organization: California Institute of Technology, Pasadena, CA
NNTP-Posting-Host: picasso.wag.caltech.edu

Kane says ...
>I seem to have missed the MIA list again.
>Is it possible to see it again please?

The MIA list is MIA?  Oh dear ...
From: rcb33483@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu (ArchTeryx)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: ArchTeryx looks for Feather...
Date: 27 Sep 92 17:03:58 GMT
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana

ArchTeryx suddenly realizes that Feather is no longer on his shoulder, 
having departed without a word to him.  He sighs a little and sits down,
hoping the small grey bird with the special talent will return to him.


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
R. Cody Buchmann                             ^.^  
  "ArchTeryx"                          "Of *course* I understand you--I speak 
email: rcb33483@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu       1406 intergalactic avian dialects!"  
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: li@Data-IO.COM (Phyllis Rostykus)
Subject: Re: A Pair of Caramel Apples (was Re: Thanks)
Organization: Data I/O Corporation
Date: Mon, 5 Oct 1992 00:51:06 GMT

In article <1992Oct2.202552.13308@miavx1.acs.muohio.edu> jwwalden@miavx1.acs.muohio.edu (Birith) writes:
>  She blinks her thanks up at him and wanders off, chewing on caramel, the
>  apple dangling at a dangerous angle from her hand.
>
>*CHOMP*  ...and the apple disappears into a rather large dragon's mouth. 

"HEY!!!!" yells Phee and bangs the dragon on his nose with one small and
chubby fist.  "That was MINE!!" 
---
Pheeeeeeeee!
li@inigo.data-io.com
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: li@Data-IO.COM (Phyllis Rostykus)
Subject: Re: Song of Sixpence - Part Five
Organization: Data I/O Corporation
Date: Mon, 5 Oct 1992 07:05:29 GMT

In article <genbfP600WAJEkpeh4@andrew.cmu.edu> John Charles Fiala <jf2z+@andrew.cmu.edu> writes:
>John smiles, enjoying the large birthday party for one of her favorite
>callahinians, sipping some mulled cider and munching on some cake as
>she orbits the blueberry pizza suspiciously.

At some point or another, Liralen happens upon John and happily hugs her.
"Glad you could make it!"  And then laughs at the suspicious look. "It's
actually rather good." Liralen says, "Caithelin and I are definitely
thinking of making it the next time she and I have some time in the kitchn
together, just to see what it might be like..."

>"One always wonders if Didi-sprite doesn't know quite what to do with
>me during these preperations: Neither am I one of the 'girls' planning
>the shindig, nor one of the 'guys' employed in moving things for it.
>What does one do with someone who's a little bit of both?"

"Why a little bit of both, don't you think?" she says and cocks her head as
the Didi-Sprite comes and wisks John away on a planning committee for
another birthday as well.  And smiles at the thought of Barnum's sign...

----
Liralen Li
li@inigo.Data-IO.com
From: jhitch@crash.cts.com (Jeffrey Hitchin)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Reminicing about alt.callahans past
Date: 29 Sep 92 23:22:32 GMT


	"You want great moments in callahan's past?" Grant scratches his
head.  "Oh, yeah.  Most of you might remember this, but when I finally got
access to the place after a four month hiatus after graduation, I sort of
got back into with with a bang!  Or in this case - a SPLAT!"

	Grant shakes off the memory of wiping key lime out of his eyes.
"You see, during the tickle/pillow fights, someone complained, so I whipped
out my everpresent backpack, and threw a pie at Bear.  Bear wasn't the one
complaining, however.  Well, things escalated a bit into a complete MESS!
I'm trying to remember exactly how things went, but some of the people 
involved with the, um, incident might be able to fill in the gaps.  I
do remember that near the end, however, I looked like a polar bear as every
inch of my person was covered in something messy.  I had a loooooooong shower
after that!" Grant looks around and wonders if anybody remembers this.
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: HDKD <HDKD@MUSICB.MCGILL.CA>
Subject: RE: Toothpick's Birthday!
Organization: McGill University
Date: Tue, 29 Sep 1992 21:50:39 GMT

In article <1992Sep16.170126.8822@midway.uchicago.edu> moh2@quads.uchicago.edu (Kateri/Mary Anne) writes:
>
>Hope I got the date right!
>
>Hope she's listening....
>
>HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
>
>love,
>
>Kateri
>--
>The autumn leaves are falling like rain.
>Although my neighbors are all barbarians,
>And you, you are a thousand miles away,
>There are always two cups at my table.   - A T'ang Dynasty poem
>.
>.
From one of the multiple corners of the Place, on a table that as been
empty foe a while, but because of the wierd magic, vibes, and
electronics anomalies that happens in here, the shape of a cyberdeck
is still barely visible at it.

Then slowly, a form start to materialise, but not completly...

"Toothpick!! I KNOW I'll be more then late, but BEST Wishes
on this birthday of yours... I'll be back and more substancially
I hope... If I can get a better hang on this %^#&^*%^#| editor...'


With that, the shape fades... just for a little while...

Serge Ayotte

-----------------------------------------------------------------------
|                   Montreal, Quebec, Canada                          |
| McGill University account: hdkd@musicb.mcgill.ca or b7qs at same    |
| Personel account         : rider@geloser.login.qc.ca                |
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: /G=Rhodri/S=James/O=SJ-Research/ADMD=INTERSPAN/C=GB/@MHS-RELAY.AC.UK
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: BAH! HUMBUG!
Date: 30 Sep 92 13:07:30 GMT

Re: BAH! HUMBUG!

SeaWasp indulges in some aseasonality:
>        "I can't STAND it! I almost screamed when I saw the TV ad for
>the Shuttlecraft ornament... in September! AUUUGGGGHHH!
>        "Two weeks! THAT is all the preparation for ANY holiday that
>should be allowed! I don't want to hear about Halloween before a week
>or two into October, then Thanksgiving about the same part of November,
>and the same time of December for Christmas. The holly-jolly carols
>make me homicidal after that. (I do my shopping three days before
>Christmas -- wastes less time that way)...."

  <<You think you have it bad?>> Windsinger throws his grumpy 2 cents worth
in.  <<We British don't go in for Halloween in such a big way, and we don't
have Thanksgiving at all.  The Christmas Cards and decorations and so on
have *already* in the shops, and the nauseating adverts will be running by
the end of the month.  Is there any more room in the Danger Room?>>

---
Windsinger  -  Rhodri James    *  "If hot food is what you're cravin'
                               *   No throat lining's worth the savin'
Rhodri.James%gb.INTERSPAN.sj   *   If your stomach's got you ravin'
            @mhs-relay.ac.uk   *   Come into the Curry Queen!"
   or                          *
rmj10@phx.cam.ac.uk            *               -- Me
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: jmpierce@whale.st.usm.edu (Jimmy Malcolm Pierce)
Subject: Re: Enter the _Sea_Slug_
Organization: University of Southern Mississippi
Date: Tue, 6 Oct 1992 18:32:56 GMT

The renowned C-Hawk writes:
>The ship slowly descends to about six feet above the top of the bar,
>stops, and lowers a loading platform down onto the bar top.  On the
>platform are three crates and a male humanoid in a bright orange
>jumpsuit.

     "Welcome back C-Hawk ! " DJ.
-- 
 Jim Pierce Bach. of Sci. in Applied Computer Science
 jmpierce@whale.st.usm.edu  Disclaimer: Standard.
  "Is it the weekend yet ?" me :-)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: gryphon@openage.openage.com (The Golden Gryphon)
Subject: Re: Pet cats
Organization: Open Age, Inc.
Date: Mon, 28 Sep 1992 14:35:51 GMT

u906451@bruny.cc.utas.edu.au (Damien Saunders) writes:

>Greetings unto the bar from Damien.

>Has anyone considered how hard it is to read the articles here with a mad
>pet cat running around the house???

>Mike there's a dollar.

>Have you got anything to slow a small black cat down???

"Try catnip.  If your cat is affected by it, then it will get hyper smelling
it, and then when she eats it, she will get down."

-- 
The Golden Gryphon 				gryphon@openage.COM
Solve a man's problem and he has 1 less.        No incumbents in 92.
Teach a man to think, and all his problems are less.
Openage - The Premier SCO UNIX integrator in the Washington D.C. area
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: u906451@bruny.cc.utas.edu.au (Damien Saunders)
Subject: A Toast.
Organization: University of Tasmania, Australia.
Date: Fri, 2 Oct 1992 05:08:37 GMT

Damien enters the bar and walks over to Mike.
Placing a dollar down on the bar.

"I'll have a "Dragon's Breath" "

Upon getting his drink walks into the centre of the room"

"I propose a toast."

"To contact lenses"
Drinks the whole lot down and throws the glass into the fireplace
Sending a burst of flame up the chimmney.

Now, the problems with my newish contacts are that I still have difficulty
removing them in the evenings and on last Saturday I spent 3/4 of an hour
trying to put in the left lens.

Damien

--
`Of COURSE I was glad to get rid of him, he's flipped. He's got mad droid
disease! He kept waving a banana in front of me and calling it a femalE
aardvark'  --Red Dwarf, "Camille" 
Damien Saunders (Gunnar Njalsson [SCA]) Email: u906451@bruny.cc.utas.edu.au
From: JBrandt@AAA.UOregon.EDU (Jay Brandt (Thyra))
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Friends ... forever ...
Date: 29 Sep 92 02:54:39 GMT
Organization: The Polyhedron Group

In article <BvAqw7.H5t@cs.columbia.edu>, korz@cs.columbia.edu (Frederick
Korz) writes:
> 
> In article <1992Sep28.132933.1839@samba.oit.unc.edu> Jack.Smoke@bbs.oit.unc.edu (Jack Smoke) writes:
> >Smoke re-enters the bar.  "I have been asked to speak more fully of
> >Arty's death.  I knew he had friends here, but I am surprised at 
> >the number and depth of feeling.
> >	Thyra, Arty was a Cherokee.  Instead of an Irish wake, lut us
> >to the meadow, build a fire, and speak his death."

<Smoke speaks eloquently of the Artful Dodger's career>

> >	Among my people it is believed that you can send things to the 
> >dead, things that they might need.  I brought with me his flight jacket.
> >In the Navy, each flight jacket is individual, different patces, different 
> >placements of patches.  Art was proud of his."
> >	Smoke tosses the jacket into the fire and sits back,
> >watching it burn.

<Thyra walks up to smoke, and nods quietly.>

     Well spoken brother. You are of course correct. We should follow the
customs of his people. I have a small token for him. 

<She reaches into a small black bag, and pulls out a small cylander with an
anteanna. It is a radio location transponder, of the type she has seen used
in SAR operations before. She tosses it into the flames, and returns to the
circle of friends.>

     May his spirit walk in beauty. May he find in the next word that which
he seeks. May his summers be long, and the hunting plentiful.

<Jason steps forward. He is in full-dress whites, in the uniform of a US
Navy sailor. He tosses a metal cube, about 18 inches on a side, into the
bonfire.>

     Seems to me he could make good use of a satelite navigation system.
Calm seas, Artful dodger, from one who was also in the Navy. Data Systems
Technician Third Class, Jay Brandt, of the guided missile cruiser Wm. H.
Standley, CG-32, salutes your brave service.

<He walks back to join thyra and the
others>.
From: mar@physics.su.OZ.AU (David Mar)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Cultural Exchange (was Re: Schooling)
Date: 6 Oct 92 06:25:07 GMT
Organization: School of Physics, University of Sydney, Australia

>[The Bellman:] From what I have seen of gridiron (which is not much)
>Australian [rugby] players could run you off your feet, assuming that we
>could pass the ball backwards as often as we liked.

Danger Mouse nods in agreement. "I have often thought exactly the same
thing, and I've seen enough American football to understand most of the
rules. The only worry I have is that the so-called 'scrimmage' line
defines the position of the defenders when the ball is 'snapped' into
play as being only a foot (or is it a yard?) from the ball. In rugby
there is a five metre zone between the teams at the equivalent time, so
the runners have time to make some passes and build up some momentum,
whereas in gridiron the tacklers will be on you much quicker. Still, I
think a decent rugby team could run circles around any NFL team, provided
they don't have to wear all that damned armour."

- Danger Mouse.