HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: fsmgs@camelot.acf-lab.alaska.edu (Michael Schmahl [Black-Robe Mage])
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Debate thoughts!
Date: 17 Oct 92 02:18:31 GMT
Article-I.D.: raven.1992Oct17.021831.24424
Distribution: usa
Organization: University of Alaska Computer Network

Chris G. vanHasselt writes
> As I listened to the first debate last night, it struck me that since
> there are now three candidates that instead of a debate, why not a game of
> Jeopardy?
> 
> A few reasons why:
> 
> 1)  We know Alex Trebek.  Alex Trebek is a friend of ours.  Jim Lehrer,
> you are no Alex Trebek!
> 
> 2)  We would know about each candidate's button pushing skill.  After all,
> a president has his one finger on the nuclear button.  I want to know if
> he has the skill to know when to push it, and how to push it.
> 
> 3)  With the choice of some good categories, we would know how much a
> candidate really knows.  Example categories for questions:  World
> Geography, Weapons of War, the Middle East, the Congress...etc.
> 
> 4)  Jeopardy is good for the losers.  After all, what is Walter Mondale
> doing now?  What does he have, except memories?  At least if he had played
> Jeopardy, he would have a copy of the home game!
> 
> Just my opinion
> Please share your thoughts!
> 
> Chris van Hasselt
> chrisvh@med.unc.edu
> 
> 
> P.S.  If you think that rec.humor is the wrong place to post this, and you
> think I should have posted to alt.rec.soc.humor.funny.political.satire,
> please, do everyone a favor and TAKE A LAXATIVE!

Really clever idea.  My significant other and I agree.  Would be a lot of  
fun to watch, and informative.
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Thoughts
From: tumidity@netlink.cts.com (Joel Garry)
Date: Wed, 14 Oct 92 19:36:17 PDT
Organization: NetLink Online Communications, San Diego CA

aphelps@vicstoy.UUCP (Austin Phelps) writes:
> >>What are wire cutters for?

For making Dyke jokes.

--                    
INTERNET:  tumidity@netlink.cts.com (Joel Garry)
UUCP:   ...!ryptyde!netlink!tumidity
NetLink Online Communications * Public Access in San Diego, CA (619) 453-1115
Newsgroups: rec.humor,alt.fan.warlord
From: pt@geovision.gvc.com (Paul Tomblin)
Subject: Re: .sig file
Reply-To: pt@geovision.gvc.com
Organization: Not officially GeoVision Systems Inc., Ottawa, Ontario
Date: Tue, 13 Oct 1992 22:55:35 GMT

okes@essex.ac.uk (Oke S) writes:

>In article <rdippold.718530817@qualcom> rdippold@qualcom.qualcomm.com (Ron Dippold) writes:
>| tma4@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu (TERRY MICHAEL AUSPITZ) writes:
>| >Hi. This is not really an r.h matter, but I'll post it here anyway since this
>| >is where I am having th problem.  The net seems to to cut off the last 2 lines
>| >of my .sig file. It should be this:
>| > [9 line sig]
>| >The net is cutting of my last 2 lines. Anyone have any suggestions?
>|
>| You do realize that every time you post, people on alt.fan.warlord are
>| making fun of you?

>If you really must have such a sig, may I suggest you manually include it in
>each posting and change the name from .signature to something else so that we
                  ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
>don't see 2 copies of it each time.

I'd like to suggest you rename it to /dev/null

-- 
Paul Tomblin, pt@geovision.gvc.com
(This is not an official opinion of GeoVision Systems Inc.)
"A witty .signature proves nothing" - Voltaire (sort of)
From: irac@yang.earlham.edu
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: cascades, and how to avoid them purple
Date: 14 Oct 92 00:22:35 GMT
Organization: Earlham College, Richmond, Indiana

In article <1992Oct8.192951.21079@donnelley.com>, jacobson@donnelley.com (Eric Jacobson) writes:
> In article <28SEP199217205559@deimos.ucc.umass.edu> s7356911@deimos.ucc.umass.edu (DYLYN) writes:
>>Avoid cascades -- end all your lines with ``purple''!
> When I belch too much, I take a burp pill.
When I drink too much, I eat an orange.

-- 

-ira

/{E-mail for questions about it all to IRAC@yang.earlham.edu}?
/{You mail me.. I ask you questions. Eat a lollipop Mary.   }?
From: luf4695@cuphub.cup.edu
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: temp
Date: 13 Oct 92 01:40:23 GMT
Organization: California University of Pennsylvania, California, PA

This is a temp posting that can be flamed at any time
From: aaf0@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu (Andrew Aaron Feigin)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: POST NUMER 40,000 "MILITARY HUMOR"
Date: 14 Oct 92 02:38:11 GMT
Organization: Lehigh University

HA! POST NUMBER 40,000, A MILESTONE FOR THIS BOARD!


In article <1179.165.uupcb@hardgood.com>, john.fix@hardgood.com (John Fix) write
s:
>TO: excalibr@camelot.bradley.edu
>
>
>
>-> >In the military, the newbies are often asked to go get things that
>-> >don't exist.  Then they go to the S-4 and ask for it and the S-4
>-> screams >at them for wasting his time.  This is called fun.
>-> >Anywayz, I'm looking for others to add to my list:
>
>This was a big joke at scout camp years ago.  A few of the other items
>were...
>
>        Skyhook
>        Key to the flagpole
>        Left handed monkey wrench
>
>
>                                  -= John =-
>
>
LATER
ANDY
-- 
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: tmoper@ccu.umanitoba.ca ()
Subject: Re: Veepee Debate
Organization: University of Manitoba, Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada
Date: Wed, 14 Oct 1992 21:00:29 GMT

>
>I don't know which debates you guys were watching, but Quayle got Gore on more
>points than the other way around.  Most of the time, Gore wound up looking
>like an idiot, while the other two abused him.  The only point Gore won was on
>abortion, and they had that one before the debates even started.  No doubt,
>the Dems lost a lot of votes during that debate, but they sure didn't go to
>Perot.
>-- 
>
>
>Tom Schmidlin       DEEP THOUGHTS: By Jack Handey - Dad always thought
>TES0@LEHIGH.EDU         laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is
>215-758-0875            why several of us died of tuberculosis.

Oops....you forgot to say "ObJoke:"



-- 
------                                                              ------
Tom Millar                                            University of Manitoba 
Tom_Millar@umanitoba.ca            "Quote"                Winnipeg, Manitoba 
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: roelle@uars_mag.jhuapl.edu (Curtis Roelle)
Subject: Re: Request Shit list
Organization: Johns Hopkins University
Date:  9 Oct 92 20:52:18 GMT

jss@kepler.unh.edu (Spectre) writes:

>                            THE SHIT LIST
>                            -------------

	[text living up to title -- deleted]

>THE WET SHIT
>    You wipe your ass fifty times and it still feels unwiped. So yo end up
>    putting toilet paper between your ass and our underwear so you don't ruin 
                                               ---    
>    them with those dreadful skid marks.

Sounds stupid, but if it keeps me from ruing your underwear, I'll try it.

CWR
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: baptiste@bnr.ca (Michael Baptiste P275)
Subject: Re: Bumper Snickers
Organization: Bell-Northern Research, BNR-RTP 
Date: Wed, 14 Oct 1992 20:32:16 GMT

Another good one:

"If you get any closer, I'll flick a booger on your windshield"

I have seen this a number of times.

Also,

"You're so close, but I hardly know you"

Mike

Gee, do you think I tailgate for a living?  :)

Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: stigh@edb.tih.no (Stig Husby)
Subject: The best joke ever
Reply-To: stigh@edb.tih.no
Organization: T I H / T I S I P
Posting-Front-End: Winix Conference v 92.05.15  1.20 (running under MS-Windows)
Date: Tue, 13 Oct 1992 11:56:27 GMT

RUR!
Xref: sparky rec.humor:31376 alt.folklore.computers:15207
From: daz@hal.gnu.ai.mit.edu (David A. Z.)
Newsgroups: rec.humor,alt.folklore.computers
Subject: Re: Thoughts
Date: 16 Oct 92 20:27:07 GMT
Followup-To: rec.humor
Organization: /etc/organization

In article <1992Oct14.050141.19044@news.columbia.edu> lasner@watsun.cc.columbia.
>In article <OKES.92Oct10134456@SunLab43.essex.ac.uk> okes@essex.ac.uk (Oke S) w
>>In article <1992Oct8.173208.13667@cs.uow.edu.au> u9147063@cs.uow.edu.au (Richa
>>
>>|>01011001 01100101 01110011 00101100 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100
>     Y          e       s        ,       space     a         n       d
>
>the rest deleted, including the C code following it.
>
>A Real Programmer (tm) can translate the bitstrings faster into ASCII code
>than the time it takes to edit the C code out of the post, much less 
>compile and load and execute it, not to mention edit the strings into
>acceptible form to use as input.  
>
>Just memorize the codes or look it up if you are a wimp, and read the bits,
>and you'll get the message.
>
>cjl

        A REAL PROGRAMMER (certainly used long before the message above)
could read the stream just looking at it, but might feel inclined to
write a program to print out the results on punch cards or paper tape
just for the hell of it.  A REAL PROGRAMMER would also be offended that
they added an 8th bit to 7-bit ASCII.

        He would NOT, however, edit the C code out of the post, or compile
and load and execute it.  A REAL PROGRAMMER would just toggle the object
code into the front panel and get it right the 1st time!  (Using self-
modifying code whenever possible of-course.)  [As opposed to some college
weenie who probably doesn't even know what "toggling the code into the
front panel" means.]

                                - David A. Z.

                                (always wishing to be more of real 
                                 programmer)

Newsgroups: rec.humor,rec.humor.d
From: monalisa@wam.umd.edu (Joe Leger)
Subject: You cannot flush a moose down a toilet
Keywords: moose, toilet
Organization: Workstations at Maryland, University of Maryland, College Park
Distribution: um
Date: Thu, 8 Oct 1992 13:57:42 GMT

Here is a funny story one of my friends wrote......Kind of compares to
Dave Barry, I think....

     First, let me begin by explaining that you cannot fluush a moose
down the toilet.  Not even a baby.  A baby moose would be about as large
as a small Volkswagen, and I've never even heard of anyone flushing a 
Volkswagen down the commode.  The toilet would have to be huge, and I have
yet to see one that size.  Second, there are alligators in the sewer
systems of the major cities in the United States.  It happens in New York
a lot, they even made a movie about it.  People buy baby alligators, and
when they don't want them, *Flush*!  There is plenty to eat and it's warm
down there.  I'm not sure about Washington, I can't find a place that sells
alligators anywhere.  Even if I did, I wouldn't flush him, I'd put him in
the sewer myself.  The last order of busines is the squirrels on crack
epidemic in New York.  It happens.  These rodents find crack vials with
some residue in it in their search for food.  It wouldn't take much to
fuck up an animal that size.  When they come down they're addicted.  Then
they go through withdrawl and become mean and aggressive.  Kind of like a
nicotine fit or perhaps PMS.  They then attack bystanders, and some of the
squirrels have rabies so it is a threat to an otherwise peaceful New York
City.  Anyway, that just about explains these three phenomena.  Well,
Aerosmith is better than the Cure, and the Sex Pistols should not be
classified under Heavy-Metal in Kemp Mill and Elvis is probably dead and has
nothing to do with this matter, so don't even think about it.


Pretty wack stuff, I'd say. (Thanks Marq)

-Joe

Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: ferguson@wizard.etsu.edu (Jason M Ferguson)
Subject: ftp site?
Reply-To: ferguson@wizard.etsu.edu (Jason M Ferguson)
Organization: East Texas State University, Commerce, TX
Date: Wed, 14 Oct 1992 17:57:34 GMT

Is there an ftp site for this newsgroup? I'd like to get the best stuff
from this group, but avoid anything with a cascade in it or with a
subject line starting with the word "re:"

to .sig or not to .sig...
  aw, what the heck...


"I told you this bucket of bolts wouldnt make it back to Arizona..."
- Jason Ferguson                  - Commerce, TEXAS                   -
- ferguson@wizard.etsu.edu        - "I thought, therefore I was"      -
- AMIGA: A Machine Is Going Awry  -      - Descartes-                 -
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: webdw@cbnews.cb.att.com (bruce.d.woods)
Subject: Re: Find the Bug (the real answer)
Organization: AT&T
Distribution: usa
Date: Tue, 13 Oct 1992 18:05:16 GMT

In article <1992Oct3.122735.1503@cnsvax.uwec.edu> andersod@cnsvax.uwec.edu writes:
>In article <1992Oct1.164635.19852@inesc.pt>, usenet@inesc.pt (USENET News System) writes:
>> 	The following deduction has a bug. C if u can figure where...
>> 
>> 	Three guys rent a three-bed room in a hotel, each one paying $10.
>> 	Late that night, the hotel manager finds ou he made a mistake:
>> 	The price of the room was not $30 but $25, so he called an
>> 	employee and told him to give the $5 back to the clients.
>> 	And so it went. But the employee started thinking: How am I going to
>> 	split the money between the 3 guys ? I better keep $2, and so give
>> 	$1 to each of them,
>> 	Conclusion:
>> 		Each client payed $9 ($10 - $1), and 3x9 = 27 plus the 
>> 	$2 the employee kept, that makes $29...
>> 	
>> 	Where is the missing $ ???
>> 
>     The missing dollar is one of math's unanswered question.  
>It is a mathematical inpossiblity, yet a real life situation.
>
>                            signed,
>                                    Douglass Anderson, a Math Major


Fallacy alert!  There is no missing dollar!

The guests paid a total of $27; $2 went to dishonest clerk & $25
went to the motel owner.  Had the clerk been more greedy he could
have taken $3 and refunded $.50 each then you would be asked to
wonder about the "extra $1.50" {3 x 9.50 plus the $3 the clerk kept
equals $31.50}.

Mr. Anderson is either kidding or in the wrong major. :-)
Xref: sparky rec.humor:30912 rec.humor.d:2365
From: ramakrish@vtcc1.cc.vt.edu (SANDY BIRCH)
Newsgroups: rec.humor,rec.humor.d,alt.tasteless.jokes
Subject: Re: WANTED: Wild Headlines and Article Titles
Date: 11 Oct 92 22:50:00 GMT
Followup-To: rec.humor
Organization: Virginia Tech, Blacksburg, Virginia
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41

In article <parvin1.718752038@husc11>, parvin1@husc11.harvard.edu (Douglas Parvin) writes...
  >Substance and truthfulness are not necessary.  Back-up stories not wanted.
  >Headlines only, damnit!  Do the tabloids one better.    
  >Headlines may be joined by description of accomp[anying photo or 
  >illustration.

I read this recently in another newsgroup. I do not remember the name of the 
original poster.

Anyways, this is about a journalist who was constantly chastised by his 
Supervisor for his (the journalist's) lack of brevity in his reports.
Fed up to his teeth, the journalist reported the story of a lunatic
rapist as follows:

    NUT SCREWS & BOLTS

---
S Ramakrishnan, CS Dept, McBryde Hall, VaTech
From: bonnaud@rtf.bt.co.uk (Neil Bonnaud)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Bathroom graffiti
Date: 9 Oct 92 10:25:20 GMT
Organization: BT Customer Systems, Brighton, UK

doug@e7sa.epi.syr.ge.com (Doug Smith) writes:
> Funniest bathroom graffiti I ever saw (still makes me laugh,
> 8 years later...) is the following:
> 
>    Written at the bottom of the door on the inside (so
>    you'll see it while you're sitting there in all your
>    glory):
> 
>          CAUTION: LIMBO DANCERS (+ down arrow)
> 

Look up and you might see:

						   /|\
	    CAUTION: BEWARE OF IRISH LIMBO DANCERS  |


[substitute appropriate ethnic group]

------------------------------------------------------------------------
inane .sig suppressed
From: awv0@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu (ALAN WRIGHT VEROSTICK)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: REQUEST: Funny names--please read!
Date: 15 Oct 92 16:30:17 GMT
Organization: Lehigh University

In article <phlegm.719113297@camelot>, phlegm@camelot.bradley.edu (Kevin Bourril
lion) writes:
>
>I'm taking a collection of humorous names for people.  These names do
>not have to be real, and in fact they shouldn't be!  Almost everyone
>has heard some of these before, I'm sure.  Some examples are...
>
>Jacques Strap
>Harry Paraballs
>Ivan Jakinov
>Heywood Jablomi
>Claude Balls
>
>etc. etc. etc.
>If I get enough of them, I'll submit them to rec.humor.funny and give
>credit to everyone who responded.
>
>How about these that I picked up from George Hayduke's book "Getting Even":

>Clint Toris
>Connie Lingus
>Ben Dover
>Albert Kohalic(nickname "Al")
>Mike Hunt



Cheers!

-- 
===============================================================================
Alan W. Verostick(Tarkus)              | "An artist's first responsibility is
215-758-1728                           |  to himself."
AWV0@PL122F.EECS.LEHIGH.EDU            |               -Miles Davis
AWV0@LEHIGH.EDU                        |
===============================================================================
"It's awful to see a family being torn apart....by a pack of wild dogs"
Xref: sparky rec.humor:30767 aus.jokes:1557 alt.folklore.computers:14921 aus.computers:343
From: kdq@quest.UUCP (Kevin D. Quitt)
Newsgroups: rec.humor,aus.jokes,alt.folklore.computers,aus.computers
Subject: Re: Thoughts
Date: 8 Oct 92 21:00:24 GMT
Reply-To: srhqla!quest!kdq
Organization: Job quest  (805) 251-8210,  So Cal: (800) 400-8210

grue@cs.uq.oz.au (Pauli Dale) writes:

> pjordan@rp.CSIRO.AU (Patrick Jordan) writes:
> 
> >No, REAL men reject keyboards and just use a soldering iron and wire cutters
> 
> What are wire cutters for?

The zeroes, obviously.


 _
Kevin D. Quitt                                 Job Quest (805) 251-8210
srhqla!quest!kdq                               Learn How to Get a Job in SoCal

                96.37% of all statistics are made up.
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: davidk@welch.jhu.edu (David Kitaguchi)
Subject: Re: Thoughts
Reply-To: davidk@welch.jhu.edu
Organization: Welch Medical Library
Date: Fri, 16 Oct 1992 14:02:45 GMT

In article 8Gq@rice.edu, adam@owlnet.rice.edu (Adam Justin Thornton) writes:
>In article <5547@balrog.ctron.com> smith@ctron.com writes:
>
>>>>Right! I run System V on my VIC-20!
>>>Hmmmm...well, I am getting SVR4 for my HP 48SX.....
>>HA!  _I'm_ just finishing up a port of VMS for my Timex Sinclair!  Top THAT!
>
>Yeah?  Yeah?  Well, I'm writing MVS for the ol' Altair 8800.  Bite ME!
>
Oh yeah?  I have just finished rewritting bsd-unix for my Ohio Scientific
Challenger C-1P!  Which I had to upgrade to 4K to do...

can't afford a real .sig
From: mitchell@odie.ee.wits.ac.za (MITCHELL JAMES)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: (was it A SAD JOKE?!)
Date: 7 Oct 92 09:55:57 GMT
Article-I.D.: odie.mitchell.8
Organization: Wits Electrical Engineering (Novell Users).

In article <OKES.92Oct6000711@SunLab42.essex.ac.uk> okes@essex.ac.uk (Oke S) writes:

>In article <1992Oct5.132053.762@altair.selu.edu> pasc1961@altair.selu.edu writes:
>| In article <1992Oct2.164206.202963@uctvax.uct.ac.za>, rybicki@uctvax.uct.ac.za writes:
>| > In article <1992Sep30.181715.26187@brtph560.bnr.ca>, bcronk@bnr.ca (Bryan Cronk P125) writes:
>| >> |>   Clinton/Gore just don't "get it": in this economic environment we
>| >> |>   cannot afford to do things which make it more expensive and less
>| >> |>   likely for companies to hire people.  
>| >> Get this thread out of rec.humor.  There are plenty of other news groups
>| >> for those who want to argue about politics.  There's absolutely nothing
>| >> humorous about the state of the economy or how little Bush has done to
>| >> improve it.
>| > ....except inasmuch as the whole of the US election campaign can be considered
>| > as some vast, dark, cosmic joke....
>|
>| Ed,
>|   What the hell are you doing?  Don't you have enough problems in 
>| South Africa to keep you occupied instead of feeding us your editorials
>| on OUR presidential campaign? 

Funny ! That's what we used to say about Americans dabbling in South African 
politics. 

James Mitchell                      ?   I'm only smiling because I
Mitchell@odie.ee.wits.ac.za         ?   have no idea what's going on!
Electrical Engineering              ?
University of the Witwatersrand     ?              ***
Xref: sparky rec.humor:31094 aus.jokes:1613 alt.folklore.computers:15105
From: t923335@minyos.xx.rmit.oz.au (IronEagle )
Newsgroups: rec.humor,aus.jokes,alt.folklore.computers
Subject: Re: Thoughts
Date: 14 Oct 92 00:24:58 GMT
Organization: RMIT Computer Centre
NNTP-Posting-Host: minyos.xx.rmit.oz.au

mdw@theory.TC.Cornell.EDU (Matt Welsh) writes:

>In article <1992Oct12.125903.3990@darwin.ntu.edu.au> nunn@nutmeg.ntu.edu.au (JsNO  BAR---NUNN) writes:
>>>Amigas are, and always have been, real computers. A real computer is defined
>>>as any computer shipped with a real operating system...
>>                                ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
>>
>>  Yer...right
>>

>Right! I run System V on my VIC-20!

>mdw

Hmmmm...well, I am getting SVR4 for my HP 48SX.....

(I am an Amiga user....)

-IE

-- 
 ############################################################
 ##  Never assume the obvious, as it is rarely the truth!  ##
 ## t923335@minyos.xx.rmit.oz.au Iron@Eagle.aero.rmit.oz.au##
 ############################################################
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: pdlemass@unix2.tcd.ie (Something original)
Subject: Perot's aptly named spokesman
Organization: Trinity College, Dublin
Date: Mon, 12 Oct 1992 15:01:40 GMT

I was wathing the news the other night and want to clarify a point :
Is Perot's spokes man called "Arson Swindle"??? -that's what it looked
like on the screen.
From: kak1@cypress31.cray.com (Kevin Kramer)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Re. Bathroom Graffiti
Date: 9 Oct 92 19:15:12 GMT
Article-I.D.: hemlock.1992Oct9.141512.16996
Organization: Cray Research, Inc.
Originator: kak1@cypress31


Here is some graffiti from Oklahoma:

Here I sit with buns-a-flexin'
Giving birth to another Texan
From: gbloom@zeus.calpoly.edu (Dark Elf {G. Bloom})
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Hello
Date: 15 Oct 92 14:02:36 GMT
Organization: California Polytechnic State University, San Luis Obispo

Once again, jhsegal@wiscon.weizmann.ac.il (Livy) says:
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Hello.  How are you today?
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>I'm fine, so cascade away!
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>OK. You can call me ray.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>You doesn't has to call me ray, you can call me Jay.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Don't you have anything better to say?
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Perhaps there is some better way?
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Oh, there MUST be, I should say!
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>I wish this would just go away.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>It might, but not today.
>>>>>>>>>>>>And yet another, enters the fray.
>>>>>>>>>>>Oh gawd, time to pray!
>>>>>>>>>>Will this last til June or May?
>>>>>>>>>This rhyme, I will not betray.
>>>>>>>>Why not today.
>>>>>>> BTW... :-)
>>>>>>Throw the "C" manual away !
>>>>>I hear that FORTRAN is the new wave!
>>>>BASIC is here to stay!
>>>12 year olds sure like to play!
>>I'll add one more line, OK?
>No fucking way!
Oh please...  how gay.


-- 
Dark Elf		| "I've never understood how God could expect his
gbloom@hebe.calpoly.edu | creatures to pick the one true religion by faith-
drow@rever.nmsu.edu	| it strikes me as a sloppy way to run the
			| universe."	-- Robert A. Heinlein
From: baptiste@bnr.ca (Michael Baptiste P275)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Bumper Snickers
Date: 14 Oct 92 14:03:24 GMT
Organization: Bell-Northern Research, BNR-RTP

One of my favorites:             

"If you don't like my driving,
 dial 1-800-EAT-SHIT"

Mike
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: RZAA80@email.sps.mot.com (Jim Chott)
Subject: Re: Sign, sign, everywhere a sign
Organization: Motorola SPS
Date: Mon, 12 Oct 1992 18:10:43 GMT

There is a sign on Hwy. 30 in Missouri about 1 hour from St. Louis
that says:

St. Clair 12

Then about 1 mile *closer* to the town of St. Clair is another sign:

St. Clair 13

How does a town get farther away as you get closer?

Jim