From: grinch@micor.ocunix.on.ca (Dave Ferguson)
Subject: Re: Blueberry Demuffinings.
Organization: M.B. Cormier INC., Orleans (Ont)
Date: Tue, 6 Oct 1992 01:34:18 GMT
Keywords: Whatever.

safarj@marcus.its.rpi.edu (Jonah Emanuel Safar) writes:
>
><Grin> Well, here's to the Democrats in '92

I just had to spend my day writing a memo on the economic agendae of
Clinton, Bush and Perot (and I'm not even American, for God's sake).
From my biased point of view, I couldn't agree with you more...and no,
it has nothing to do with Perot telling Bahbawa Walters that "if
economists were so smart we wouldn't be in this mess in the first place."

>I've run
>into an interesting problem here with my sexuality and I was wondering if
>anyone else out there may have experienced the same, or at least may be able
>to offer some words of advice.  I am Bi, there is no doubt as to that fact,
>however... There have been times, whether it be on the computer, or in every
>day life when someone, male or female, finds I am Bi and makes an advance.
>It usually leaves me in a bit of a quandry.  The fact is, while I do _enjoy_
>being with either sex, I am _not_ attracted to everyone, no matter what the
>sex. 

I can only offer my gay perspective, but it's kinda sorta the same thing
here.  I've found that many people equate homosexuality with access to
sex, especially in gay men.  As a consequence, as soon as people find out
you're gay, they see you as an easy target, and practically *expect* you
to have sex with them if they show the slightest interest in you.  As we
learned in peer counselling training, men in our society are not brought
up to deal with being treated as a sex object.  Many gay men treat other
men as sex objects, just as many straight men treat women as sex objects.
I know lots of gay men, and even though I am one, I'm not attracted to most
of them.  As much as I *hate* to admit it, I'm sure many (or just one or
two 8-) feel the same way about m  

One thing I *have* found is that the men who make moves on me are one of
two types:  a) cruisey people after a meaningless fling, or b) people who
have just come into gay space and don't realize that it's not their ticket
to a wild sex life.  Most people in the first category take hints fairly
quickly, while those in the second learn from experience (although there
are exceptions to both).

Once I was cruised in the parking lot at a gay bar by this old man who
wanted me to go for a drive with him.  I just wanted to go home, but he
would *not* take no for an answer, so I ended up just walking away, and I
felt like a *total* bitch for being so rude.  When I told a female friend
of mine about it, she said that she's had to be a bitch to hundreds of guys,
and it comes with the territory of being a reasonably attractive human
being.

To paraphrase someone on the net, you always have the right to say no,
and you *don't* have to have a reason.

Just addin' my $0.02 Cdn (or $0.016 US)

-- 
 D.C.X. Ferguson            ____  ____  ____   "It is not difference which 
 grinch@micor.ocunix.on.ca  \  /  \  /  \  /  immobilizes us, but silence. 
                             \/    \/    \/  And there are so many silences
 Ottawa, Ontario, Canada                    to be broken." -Audre Lorde
Newsgroups: soc.bi