HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: mlegare@wetware.com (BoBteCh)
Subject: Re: the whole foods craze
Keywords: the whole ego craze
Organization: sulphur & oxygen
Date: Mon, 31 Aug 1992 06:35:08 GMT

durway@rtp.dg.com (Lindsey Durway) writes:

] In article <p1kl8o4@fido.asd.sgi.com>, cj@eno.wpd.sgi.com (C J Silverio) writes:
] > ---
] > I am eating potato chips, but I am guilt-free.
] > I am eating all-natural hand-cooked potato chips.
] > I am eating chemical-free potato chips.
] > I am eating "yogurt and green onion" potato chips.
] > I bought them at Whole Foods.
] > I am virtuous.
] 
] You forgot:
] I am talking about myself.
] 
] > None of these calories count.
] 
] Nothing else counts except you, you, you.



fuck that

i just ate a pizza

with extra cheese


and you can bet i ate the hell out of it

BoB
teCh
me me me me me me em me ememememmemmemmemememmemmemmemewhatmemememememe
From: schnitzi@cs.ucf.edu (Mark Schnitzius)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Potatoes
Date: 4 Sep 92 17:43:16 GMT
Distribution: talk
Organization: University of Central Florida

I ate a potato for dinner last night.

As a kid, I played with Mr. Potato Head.

The Irish Potato Famine was a great tragedy in
human history.

We used to decide things as kids by playing
"One Potato, Two Potato".

Idaho has a lot of potato farmers.

Did you ever stare at a word so long that it
starts to look funny?

My parents used to dance the "Mashed Potato".


mark schnitzius
schnitzi@eola.cs.ucf.edu
From: nj@magnolia.Berkeley.EDU (Narciso Jaramillo)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: please continue
Date: 2 Sep 92 09:24:59
Organization: Postcarcinogenic Bliss, Inc.
NNTP-Posting-Host: magnolia.berkeley.edu


He plunged his hands into the vat of teeming lice, then poured them over his
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: rdc@netcom.com (Rachel Dafni Christy)
Subject: Re: challenge for Carasso
Date: Wed, 02 Sep 92 00:48:58 GMT
Organization: 'Ex-Biology Grad Student, Student of Life.

IN TALK.BIZARRE sabbott@nmsu.edu (SDA) writes:
)
)ok then Roger is a bigot not a racist, Semitic semantics
)is really beside the point and you know it.

First, define "Bigot", and then I may or may not agree with you.

-- 
--
cj gypsy
Xref: sparky talk.bizarre:28780 alt.sex:28312
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,alt.sex
Subject: Hooray for Jack Chick!
From: cjones@miavx1.acs.muohio.edu (Oates)
Date: 3 Sep 92 16:33:16 -0500
Organization: Database Spammers, Inc.

Yeah Jack Chick!  Bringing some morality and virtue back to our depraved
campus (and society as a whole).  Look at all these booklets we got on
Tuesday!  CITY OF DOOM, THIS WAS YOUR LIFE, SATAN'S MASTER!  I just
*LOVE* em.  They're my favorite bedtime reading material!

Remember:

(copyrights on religious materials suck, so I'm paraphrasing)

God doesn't like to play Monopoly.
You either play with Him or you don't.

The Old Testament contains some tough rules about that nasty thing married
people do for procreation only:

Sleeping Around:  that nasty thing married people do, but with someone
you aren't married to!  If you do this, you have to smoke marijuana until
you DIE!

Other type of Sleeping Around:  that nasty thing married people do, but
you do it when you're not married.  You don't get stoned with this one,
but you still DIE!

(reminds me of la petit morte...er...)

An icky type of Sleeping Around:  that nasty thing married people do,
but this time you don't do it with someone you can marry!  And we're not
talking about Sleeping Around or the Other type of Sleeping Around.  This
one is ICKY!  And you DIE! for this one too, both of you (or more, if your
tastes run that way).

An icky type of Not Sleeping Around:  that nasty thing married people do,
but without people.  And not only do you DIE! but so does the furry (or
scaley or cold blooded or feathery) thing DIE!s too!

And did you know that this is all so we don't get sick, cause the guy who
hates Monopoly loves us and wants to keep our houses in good repair.

And that anti-Monopoly dude says that Thursday is no different than some
Monday 2000 years ago!

God's new release shows that the ultimate anti-Milton Bradely force hasn't
changed his mind, though I wonder if it's about Monopoly or the nasty
thing?  Didn't He enjoy the sixties like my parents?

Just for your information...
-- 
Oates                              cjones@miavx1.acs.muohio.edu
                                   cj5jsanu@miamiu.bitnet
Flame, flame, go away!  Come again some other day!
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: PJF4081@cc.utah.edu (mr. wonderful)
Subject: Re: GOOLEY: I SAW ELVIS
Summary: dumb dumb dumb
Keywords: shithead
Organization: committee for the advancement of disgust
Date: Sun, 23 Aug 92 15:53:20 MDT
X-News-Reader: VMS NEWS 1.10

In <edz=02Sx1eT501@JUTS.ccc.amdahl.com> nmt@fbi.cccbm.nasa.ccc writes:

> 
>      What's all this about Elvis still being alive?????  What's so great about
> this drug addict?????  So what if he was a great singer?????  Did he call 
> himself the king????? or did someone give him this title?????  


	YOU SHOULD USE A BIT MORE PUNTUATION TO HELP GET YOUR POINT 
	ACROSS.  I AM STILL UNCLEAR. PERHAPS YOU COULD ELABORATE.

			oh. btw, piss off.  elvis did more for this
			country than your sorry ass ever will. ciao.


()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()(
	PJF---->Biochem. grad student. "suffering *is* my game.		
	  	            WORK  :==  FUTURE
	"i am involved in the petty business of scientific research."
                         "feel free to feel me."
\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: cpl1@kimbark.uchicago.edu (M. d'Nereverri)
Subject: snippet
Reply-To: cpl1@midway.uchicago.edu
Organization: The Lunatic Fringe
Date: Sun, 30 Aug 1992 06:29:05 GMT


"so, let me see if i've got this right:  you didn't have any problem
with going to your mother and telling her you're a dyke.  but.  you're
terrified of her finding out that you keep kosher.  right?"

"Yeah, well, I guess that pretty much sums up our relationship right
there..."


M.
oy vey

Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: kohli (Mr. Bad Judgment)
Subject: ata boy: a brief, yet stupid, history
Followup-To: talk.bizarre
Reply-To: kohli@aslmr.med.ge.com (Mr. Bad Judgment)
Organization: Cheesemaster International, and Associates
Date: Thu, 3 Sep 92 23:38:58 GMT

>Ata boy's been around for a while, but I don't
<seem to remember him as being this venomous and stupid.
>
<Of course, I could be wrong...
>
<BENth
>
as ata boy, he has not been around all that
long.  1.5 years does not an oldby make.  2 years
ago he achieved VERY high marks on the idiot
scale when he posted under his real name, Don
"Duh" "The Thinking Man's Mollusc" Dodson.  it
was quite pathetic.  he got flamed with such
great vigor and frequency that his father
actually pleaded for mercy on his behalf.

the rest of the world merely blushes and ignores
him.
From: ken@aiai.ed.ac.uk (Ken Johnson)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: English usage
Date: 3 Sep 92 10:19:46 GMT
Followup-To: talk.bizarre
Organization: Bugs-R-Us


In article <25444@castle.ed.ac.uk> fofp@castle.ed.ac.uk (M Holmes)
writes:

#  [mortgage interest tax relief is] ...  social engineering.  It's also a
#  reverse robin hood situation

-- Ken "spot the gibberish" Johnson


-- 
//// Advice to dieters:         ////  Ken Johnson, A I Applications Institute
////   Never eat more than      ////       80 South Bridge, EDINBURGH EH1 1HN
////   you can carry.           ////                 E-mail ken@aiai.ed.ac.uk
////              -- Miss Piggy ////     phone 031-650 2756  fax 031-650 6513
From: ken@aiai.ed.ac.uk (Ken Johnson)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: weekends
Date: 1 Sep 92 09:56:08 GMT
Followup-To: talk.bizarre
Organization: Bugs-R-Us


In article <p94l8cc@fido.asd.sgi.com> cj@sgi.com (C J Silverio) writes:

#  I want to buy two t-shirts.
#  These t-shirts will both say:
#  
#  	NOBODY KNOWS
#  	   I'M BI
#  


Perhaps you could do a version that will bring an end to Size Prejudice
all over the world.  It should say

            NOBODY KNOWS
              I'M BIG

and it will come in Extra Large Size only of course. 

-- Ken "economy size" Johnson


-- 
//// Advice to dieters:         ////  Ken Johnson, A I Applications Institute
////   Never eat more than      ////       80 South Bridge, EDINBURGH EH1 1HN
////   you can carry.           ////                 E-mail ken@aiai.ed.ac.uk
////              -- Miss Piggy ////     phone 031-650 2756  fax 031-650 6513
Xref: sparky talk.bizarre:27847 soc.singles:23843
From: pw@panix.com (Paul Wallich)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,soc.singles
Subject: Re: Useful Advice For the Love Lorned
Date: 28 Aug 92 13:28:59 GMT
Organization: Trivializers R Us

In article <1992Aug28.014330.29525@newshost.anu.edu.au> jjj@marvin.anu.edu.au (Joni Johnson) writes:
>In article <Btn9IA.BBu@news.larc.nasa.gov> kludge@grissom.larc.nasa.gov ( Scott Dorsey) writes:
>>>kludge@grissom.larc.nasa.gov ( Scott Dorsey) writes:
>>>] 
>>>] You have obviously not tried picking women up in the all-night laundromat.
>>
>>>MISS DRIEUX SAYS:
>>>
>>>but Scott, you're suppose to take them for a Spin.
>>
>>Yes, but how do I avoid being taken to the cleaners?
>
>You just have to tumble her instead.

No, no. She can't take you to the cleaners; you're _at_ the cleaners.
This is what make laundry romance so attractive.

paul      two machines, no waiting except thursdays
From: EE117@LIVERPOOL.AC.UK
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: will this get me to the top of t.b.
Date: 28 Aug 92 16:42:47 GMT
Organization: University of Liverpool

will leaving a blank space before the subject title ensure I'm
first on the (sorted) t.b. list ?

-Ian.
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: rdc@netcom.com (Rachel Dafni Christy)
Subject: Re: talking to women
Date: Thu, 03 Sep 92 04:21:03 GMT
Organization: 'Ex-Biology Grad Student, Student of Life.

IN TALK.BIZARRE dolan@XENON.BERKELEY.EDU (Kent Paul Dolan) writes:
)
)Um. Roger? I have had to physically peel young, stacked, georgous
)amorous females off my unwilling body. 

Sexually abusing your 16 year old step daughter that you brought to
fat.bob, does not count.

)In your wildest fantasies, you'll never approach 0.01% of my ability
)to talk to women, mostly because you can't keep your mouth shut for
)ten seconds running, or talk about anything but yourself, and women
)like to be listened to as well as listening to you.

And here all this time I thought it was your charming look that
crosses the professor from Back to the Future with Buddy Holly's nerd
glasses.  So you say that your ability to talk to women is the key.  I
see.  Fascinating.

)Kent, the man from xanth.

Kent.  Nerd glasses.  Xanth.  Alien sounding name.
Yes!  Yes!  Yes!  I've never seen them together!
Yes!  Ken *is* Sumernerd!  Who would have thought...

.
.

-- 
--
cj gypsy
From: rpwhite@taurus.cs.nps.navy.mil (rpwhite)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: IF IT'S NOT SCOTTISH! IT'S CRAP! (was: Re: STOP this crap)
Date: 31 Aug 92 22:23:16 GMT
Reply-To: rpwhite@cs.nps.navy.mil (rpwhite)
Followup-To: talk.bizarre,alt.newbie,alt.test,misc.test
Organization: Elkhorn Yacht Club, Moss Landing CA

Steve Franklin writes:

>who is this? Sheezus, how does one say "shut-up" politely yet bizarrely
>in such a forum? In alt.flame, you flame - in alt.sex, you make fun of
>their lack-thereof... In comp.sys.mac, you make IBM jokes. But, how
>oh how do you tell someone to shut up in talk.bizarre?


In the immortal words of Starcap'n Ra:     

          "You are a stupid asshole.  Shut the fuck up."
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: rdc@netcom.com (Rachel Dafni Christy)
Subject: TALK.BIZARRE WILL BE DESTROYED BY NEWBIAL FRESHMEN NEXT WEEK
Date: Mon, 31 Aug 92 16:57:05 GMT
Organization: 'Ex-Biology Grad Student, Student of Life.

IN TALK.BIZARRE gypsy@alembic.acs.com (hippolyte) writes:
)
)t.b used to be my cup of tea.  now carasso has
)turned it into a haven for horny freshmen. 


PUBLIC NOTICE	PUBLIC NOTICE	PUBLIC NOTICE	PUBLIC NOTICE	

						   
		       IN ONE WEEK TALK.BIZARRE
			       WILL BY
			       FLOODED
				 WITH
			   NEWBIE ARTICLES
				   
			    DESTROYED WITH
				   		   
		   HUNDREDS OF NEWBIE JUNK ARTICLES
		   ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
				   
     FROM HUNDREDS OF DIFFERENT READERS AND DIFFERENT NEWSGROUPS
				   
		 SO THAT NO KILL FILE CAN BE CREATED.
				   

				   
			     ***UNLESS***
				   
			GYPSY APOLOGIZES TO ME
				   
			       PUBLICLY
				   

PUBLIC NOTICE	PUBLIC NOTICE	PUBLIC NOTICE	PUBLIC NOTICE	

CARASSO "I'M NOT JOKING.  ALT.SEX, REC.HUMOR, REC.PETS, K12, AND
	 STARTREK AUTHORS WILL FLOOD TALK.BIZARRE"








-- 
--
hugs, Rachel
From: reese@vax.oxford.ac.uk
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Gras
Date: 24 Aug 92 19:57:59 GMT
Organization: Oxford University VAX 6620


I wonder how long grass lives. I mean the green stuff on your lawn, not
the "Death-by-stupidity" kind.
So, how long does an individual stalk of grass live?  It gets cut down
every now and then, but is the grass I walk on in the parks the same
grass that all those famous but oh-so-long-dead people walked on?
If so, I mean ... wow ... erm.

Nothing.

Jason
From: dliebman@terapin.com (David Liebman)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: hello
Date: 29 Aug 92 23:36:55 PST
Organization: BBS

 
 
         //\\ 
     /~~//~~~/|
    /-\---/-/ |\      
    | x\ /x | |\\\      
    |   !   |/  \\\\   
     --===--    \\\\
      d~~~b/
From: rone@aludra.usc.edu (Ron Echeverri)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: I'm no semanticist, but i play one on USENET (Was Re: ok you semanticists)
Date: 31 Aug 1992 20:14:41 -0700
Organization: University of Southern California, Los Angeles, CA
NNTP-Posting-Host: aludra.usc.edu

In article <1992Aug31.064642.13314@wetware.com> mlegare@wetware.com (BoBteCh) writes:
>i need a word to represent the concept of, having read a particularly
>piquiant post, slamming my head onto the desktop once, but with great
>speed and violence, then returning to neutral.

"Cranially spiking the keyboard"

5150
you're welcome
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: ra@asuvax.eas.asu.edu (Starcap'n Ra)
Subject: Re: Hep: How it all started
Organization: t.b
Date: Wed, 26 Aug 1992 20:26:33 GMT

act@csc.canberra.edu.au (Cyclops) writes:
> >"I stepped on a rusty nail."
> 
> "Did Rusty complain?", asked Nail.

HAW HAW HAW
I GET IT!@#

DAN QUAYLE CANT SPELL!!@!@@

I GET IT !!@!@@!

HAW HAW JUST LIKE POTATOE!@!# HAW! I GET IT.

--Starcap'n Ra       {ames,gatech,husc6,rutgers}!ncar!noao!asuvax!kennedy
                        {allegra,decvax,ihnp4,oddjob}--^
                                          ^---------------The Wrong Choice
                             internet: kennedy@asuvax.asu.edu
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: franklin@ug.cs.dal.ca (Steve Franklin)
Subject: Re: ata boy was sexually rejected recently
Organization: Math, Stats & CS, Dalhousie University, Halifax, NS, Canada
Date: Fri, 28 Aug 1992 23:48:36 GMT

In <1992Aug28.223529.27601@wdl.loral.com> bard@cutter.ssd.loral.com (J H Woodyatt) writes:

>In article <BtpF9J.E6s@cs.dal.ca>, franklin@ug.cs.dal.ca (Steve Franklin) writes:
># ...clearly a sign of something aside from civility and etiquette. Those
># are two qualities that are surely MISSING from our generation.

>Someone, *PLEASE*, publicly shame this individual with a flame that
>will cause his entire body to curl in upon itself like the Igli in
>Heinlein's _Glory_Road_ -- I'm too constipated right now, or I would
>do it myself.


Hey there my friend - try apple juice for your constiptation and a valium
for your attitude. Not only did you defame Heinlein by including his name
in your worthless post, but you also suggested that I am shameable. Not
only am I utterly asbestos-free-yet-oh-so-flame-retardent, but I am 
very good at judging individuals for their stupidity. You my friend
scored a -30 on the Steve-Franklin intelligence test, and continue to
fall as you speak. Please stop typing, do not sniff glue any more, and
continue to go to therapy. 
   steve
-- 
aasdSteveFranklin-Subliminal Psychology Major.ks;dlasBlueJaysRULEkasdfeahsdbfl
sd;lfaswoq[eBuyMeAQuadra!!!mbnZMXCNdfsba;KdSPAMiuroqiyetIBMSuxiweuryth'ewr;mxn
qpuepriuPartyOneqtuj;,n.,xnc,kjasFlameMeNot!;lkj;lkgkjd;askElvisLivesjhfquweru
zx.cfranklin@ug.cs.dal.ca,sk;t;lrut[Superboy@ac.dal.cav.zx,Physics!eq3rwkh;oHA
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,alt.wanted.moslem.gay
From: glp5941@ultb.isc.rit.edu (Greg Pratt)
Subject: Re: News of Iran
Summary: brief on recent history of anti-gay purge in Iran
Originator: glp5941@ultb
Keywords: homosexuality, Iran, fundamentalism, criminal justice
Organization: Rochester Institute of Technology, Rochester, NY  [USA]
Date: Wed, 26 Aug 1992 07:32:44 GMT

Iran has been particularly repressive against gays in recent history
(possibly due largely to its religiously fundamentalist government).  When
the Ayatollah came to power in 1979, massive purgese of homosexuals began in
Iran.  Gay persons were rounded up and executed en masses in town squares all
over the country.  In May, 1990, Iran's chief justice announced a new
crackdown on Iranian gays.  This included a list of five options given to
persons convicted of homosexuality: being beheaded with a sword, stoned to
death, burned alive, buried alive, or hurled from a great height.  (source:
Lavender Lists)


-- 
Greg (Gregory Loren) Pratt          Rochester Institute of Technology
Snail:  CPU 1519   25 Andrews Memorial Drive   Rochester, NY 14623-5689   USA
glp5941@ultb.isc.rit.edu | GLP5941@ritvax.isc.rit.edu | GLP5941@RITVAX.BITNET
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: act@csc.canberra.edu.au (Cyclops)
Subject: Re: Songs Hendrix never recorded
Organization: University of Canberra, Camaroon
Date: Fri, 4 Sep 92 03:39:24 GMT

EE117@LIVERPOOL.AC.UK (a pom) writes:
>>>>> >: "My wind cries Mary"
>>>>> >"All Along The Shopping Mall"
>>>>> "Voodoo Chili"
>>>>"Hey Bartholomewe-Jamison"
>>>Rutherford B. Haze
>>>Hey Skip!
>>Purple Face!
>Burning of the Midnight Butt
Nowhere over the Usenet

act@csc.canberra.edu.au       ceteris paribus
Look Once...         .-)      
   Look TwEyece..    .-) .-)       
      Half See...    .-)         
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: ajm@wag.caltech.edu (Abner J. Mintz)
Subject: Re: Short Shameful Breakfast
Organization: California Institute of Technology, Pasadena, CA
Date: Wed, 26 Aug 1992 00:03:27 GMT

Rob Dobson writes:
>LAst summer i lived with a guy who had no job, but he did have a credit
>card. We lived right near an Exxon station. His standard breakfast was:

>2 Exxon Hot dogs
>A USA Today
>and a coke

>which he would, of course, put on his credit card.

And it sounds like the USA Today was the most nutritious part of his breakfast,
too.  But he would have been better off not using his credit card as a 
cracker, putting everything else on it.  After he ate it, he'd have to apply
for a new one, right?
From: rpwhite@taurus.cs.nps.navy.mil (rpwhite)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Proposal for alt.lingerie/hosiery/heels
Date: 3 Sep 92 18:51:35 GMT
Reply-To: rpwhite@cs.nps.navy.mil (rpwhite)
Organization: Elkhorn Yacht Club, Moss Landing CA

mertes@vax.sonoma.edu writes:

|This is a proposal for a new group! This group would entail the discussion of
|lingerie/hosiery/heels! I have been aware of the fact that many people on
|alt.sex, alt.lycra, alt.sex.bondage, alt.personals discuss these items
|sometimes in great detail. The discussion would center around the
|kinds/styles/colors/brands/magazines/videos/mail order/department stores/models
|that wear such attire. The forum would be open to anyone to discuss such things
|it is intended for all and any who enjoy admiring women in such attire/ and
|well if men enjoy wearing such attire then they can join the forum, whatever
|ones taste!  I am sure they can find something on this newsgroup....
|
|I propose the name  alt.lingerie/hosiery/heels
|
|I do not know how to start it or what the process is I was told to propose this
|here and I hope this can be the start of a great new group that has been
|necessary for a long time......

I have no joke, I just like saying I SEE A GREAT NEED.
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: schnitzi@cs.ucf.edu (Mark Schnitzius)
Subject: Re: please continue
Organization: University of Central Florida
Date: Thu, 3 Sep 1992 13:14:50 GMT

rone@aludra.usc.edu (Ron Echeverri) writes:

>nj:
>>He plunged his hands into the vat of teeming lice, then poured them over his
>mother, making sure to cover her well.  "Ok, Mum, when you're ready, make sure
and hold on tight to the umbrella.  And when you see the tombstone, take
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: schnitzi@cs.ucf.edu (Mark Schnitzius)
Subject: Lost in the Supermarket
Organization: University of Central Florida
Distribution: talk
Date: Thu, 27 Aug 1992 17:34:15 GMT

Sticker seen on a package in the meat department
of my local grocery store:

   "We Gladly Break Packages"

Heck, me too.


mark
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: rwd4f@poe.acc.Virginia.EDU (Rob Dobson)
Subject: Mixing Newsfroups
Organization: University of Virginia
Date: Wed, 2 Sep 1992 14:09:41 GMT


"When I showed up at the Neil Diamond concert without a ticket,
everyone stood up, laughed, and pointed at my erection."

trivia: which two froups' "humor" did i combine here?

-r
From: jperry@oahu.cs.ucla.edu (John Perry)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Rejected Movie Critic Quotations
Date: 27 Aug 92 16:18:32 GMT
Organization: UCLA Computer Science Department

andsol@owlnet.rice.edu (Andrew J. "Randy Andy" Solberg) writes:
>"Kim's h00ters just won't quit!"  Spencer Christian, _Good Morning America_
>
    Obviously, you haven't read any movie reviews by Joe Bob Briggs.  He has
a syndicated column, and he only reviews drive-in movies.  Instead of scoring
the movies with stars or thumbs up (up what, I might ask), he scores them on
buckets of blood, amounts of kung fu, and ... that's right ... hOOters.


   Five buckets of blood, two heads roll, eight pairs of hOOters, Joe Bob
   says check it out,

   john

-- 
v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-
    "Reality is a sandwich that I did not order."
			       Zippy the Pinhead (for president)
^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-
From: mha1@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu (MICHAEL H. ALAIMO)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: ENTROPY & IRONY
Date: 28 Aug 92 18:25:10 GMT
Organization: Lehigh University

In article <33bnf2l.richh@netcom.com>, richh@netcom.com (richh) writes:
>All right, *you* come up with a better title for a biography of
>Thomas Pynchon.


Ok, how 'bout

   "Thomas Pynchon- The Life and Times of a Cultural Elite With No Family
    Values, Who's Probably A Jew or an Italian or Some Ethnic Thing Like That"

    By J. Danforth Quayle.
-- 


: MIKE ALAIMO        :    ************************
: Brain Surgeon      :    *       BUSH-FREE      *
: Rocket Scientist & :    *        IN '93        *
: General Neophyte   :    ************************
                        "Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things."
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: rwd4f@poe.acc.Virginia.EDU (Rob Dobson)
Subject: SEX
Followup-To: alt.sex
Organization: University of Virginia
Date: Tue, 1 Sep 1992 12:47:28 GMT

>
>Name				Number of times having sex this week
>------------------------------------------------------------------------
>Scott Dorsey			3
>Roger Carasso		       11
>Mark Gooley			0*
>ben                             9
>ben                             3
>rpwhite                         0
>
>*masturbation does not count.

Yes, masturbation does not count. BUT, just to defend poor gooley, lets
make a new list.

NAME                            Number of times EJACULATED this week

Scott                           3
Carasso                         11 (?!@!)
Gooley                          32,456
ben                             9
rpwhite                         0



so now we know why gooley has that glazed smile on his face!

-r


Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: ajd@itl.itd.umich.edu (Arthur Delano)
Subject: One-line bio
Organization: international
Date: Fri, 28 Aug 1992 02:25:16 GMT


Beaujolais-in-a-box, gin, a great deal of ice.


AjD
they may never find my body, either