From: dhardin@bbn.com (Dawn Hardin)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Hints (Was Re: What is attractive)
Date: 5 Nov 92 20:12:07 GMT
Article-I.D.: news.lfj00nINNcmn
Reply-To: dhardin@spcink.bbn.com (Dawn Hardin)
Organization: Bolt Beranek and Newman Inc., Cambridge MA
NNTP-Posting-Host: bbn.com

In article <1992Nov5.193935.14073@fid.morgan.com> sethb@fid.morgan.com (Seth Breidbart) writes:
>In article <lfgan9INNhub@news.bbn.com> dhardin@spcink.bbn.com
>(Dawn Hardin) writes:
>>larry@b8.b8.ingr.com (Larry Billings) writes:
>
>>>You know I love the baby very much, but the first year or two together is
>>>always the hardest, because the people have to get to know each other, and
>>>having a child can only complicate things.
>>>
>>>Needless to say, she EXPLOADED!!!
>>
>>If it had been me, your ass would have hit the asphalt so hard that the
>>asphalt would have dented.
>>
>>That said, I don't think honesty was the problem here.  You were absolutely
>>correct to be honest here, because think of the problems you'd have had
>>if you lied about something as important as that, and went into a permanent
>>relationship with ambiguous feelings about acting as a stepfather without
>>having had time alone with the mother first.  It would have really sucked
>>for all three of you.  But you can't blame this on being truthful.  
>
>Dawn, I don't think you read the same posting I did (and we both
>quoted it).  Larry said that he loved the baby, but he would have
>preferred meeting the woman before she had it (or in a universe in
>which she didn't have it).  Given that he loved the baby, I don't see
>any reason to believe that he would have had "ambiguous feelings about
>acting as a stepfather".

You might be right.  I thought he said he loved the baby, but he preferred
that the baby not live with them.  That's not such an evil, awful
thing for him to say, assuming a safe biological dad willing to take a larger 
share, but if he said it to me he'd have hit the street head first.
No, if you're right then it wouldn't have bothered me at all.  My own
darling mutant has said that he wished that he had met me before Alice
was born, or that Alice could have been his own baby.  I wish those things
myself, although neither of us would want a different baby than this one.

OK Larry, we're disagreeing over what you thought and what happened to you. 
Were you saying "send the kid to its father" or "too bad things worked 
out the way it did?"  Remember, if you phrase your answer wrong or spell
something wrong or misplace a comma, you're going to be accused of being
an evil car-alarm-owning Bush-voting fascist who ought to be taken out
and shot before you cause the downfall of coffee-drinking-civilization as
we know it.

(Seriously, I repeat that I don't think "send the kid to its father" is
at all a *bad* thing to say if that's an option, just that I wouldn't date 
anyone who said it to me.)

Dawn
"Then I check out that chick Leda with the swan pecking at her pink egg tempera
nipple.  Hey, what that swan be doing?  And why?  And how 'bout those plump
maidens, those hot cherubic babes being presented to Apollo, Dionysius,
Neptune or one of those other well hung gods?"  by Bongwater
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