HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: mathew <mathew@mantis.co.uk>
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Picnics
Date: Mon, 27 Jul 92 15:36:15 BST
Distribution: world
Organization: Mantis Consultants, Cambridge. UK.

dre@catnip.berkeley.ca.us (I Would Like To Return this TOBACCONIST; It Is Scratc writes:
> mathew@mantis.co.uk (mathew) writes:
> >The little buggers crawl into CD jewel boxes, worm their way under the
> >cardboard of the back cover, then die.
> 
> Not only did they get in all of my glasses and croak, the little
> buggers also got into my dry goods and thrived.  <boom> throw out the
> rice.  <boom> throw out the flour.  <boom> throw out the sugar.

Yup, those are the ones.  One of the more repellent memories from my
adolescence is finding a jar of flour literally writhing with thrips.

> >Ceci | n'est pas une pipe.
> 
> Yes, you are a clever one, aren't you mathew.

Aww, put your claws away.

Has anyone started a bandy defense fund yet?


mathew
-- 
"Even the most bizarre of the unions (probably that between a cat's gall
 stone and a single note 'G' from CNN's ident theme) managed to convey a
 sense of rampant impropriety."  -- 'Fortran Five', Simon G. Lawrence Leonard

Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: z1dan@exnet.iastate.edu (Dan Sorenson)
Subject: Re: Micro Beards (was something else entirely) 
Reply-To: z1dan@exnet.iastate.edu (Dan Sorenson)
Organization: PETA: People for the Eating of Tasty Activists
Date: Thu, 30 Jul 1992 06:08:04 GMT

elliott-bruce@CS.YALE.EDU (Bruce Elliott) writes:
>z1dan@exnet.iastate.edu (Dan Sorenson) writes:
>>
>>	Peeve: The Moron Turbucular, or is it Mormon Tabernacle, Chior is
>>making an appearance here in Ames.  The only thing I want to hear is
>>Handel's "Messiah" from these people.  I'm not going. I'd rather travel 200
>>miles to hear what I want than half a mile to hear nothing I like.  Stuff
>>that into one of your wives, Brigham Young!

>So what's the problem?  Is someone forcing you to attend?  Should all 
>entertainment that you dislike be banned from Ames?  I'm sure there must
>be a lot of people in Ames who want to hear the Mormon Tabernacle Choir,
>otherwise the choir wouldn't have gone there.  I know if they came to New
>Haven to sing, I would definitely want to attend.

	Go right ahead and attend.  I don't care.  My peeve was that
a perfectly good chance to hear Handel's "Messiah" is going to waste because
the choir is going to sing popular things.  Why should I waste my money on
hearing music I don't like just because it's performed by a group that is
remotely talented?  I'll give you another hint: I skipped the Rolling Stones
and Paul McCartney concerts for just this reason.  If Iron Maiden or Motorhead
ever played Ames you'dfind me camping out two weeks in advance to get good
tickets, and Bad Company with Damn Yankees found me waiting in line.  To
make this a little clearer, Damn Yankees opened up for Bad Company.  I watched
half an hour of Bad Company, then went home to watch Star Trek and had a
bite to eat.  It was time well spent compared to the concert hall.

>Peeve:  American professional choirs tend to have too much vibrato,           
>especially in the women.

	Just one minor mis-read of the word "vibrato" above, which involves
reading "vibrator," and this sentence takes on a whole new meaning.


--
<Dan Sorenson, DoD #1066 |"There'll be angels on Ariels in leather>
<z1dan@exnet.iastate.edu | and chrome, Ridin' down from heaven    >
<viking@iastate.edu      | just to carry me home." -- R. Thompson >
< ISU thinks I need more education, which they provide for a fee. >
Organization: Penn State University
Date: Tue, 28 Jul 1992 18:45:25 EDT
From: Jenni Sheehey <JMS111@psuvm.psu.edu>
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Drug testing and welfare
 <14omq0INNltd@darkstar.UCSC.EDU> <92206.093638JMS111@psuvm.psu.edu>
 <24151@castle.ed.ac.uk>

In article <24151@castle.ed.ac.uk>, fofp@castle.ed.ac.uk (M Holmes) says:
>
>Jenni seems to have a fair point in that if folks want "Guvmint" money
>then the Guvmint is entitled to ensure that it's spent in a socially
>approved manner. Fair enough, iunless the welfare is the due proceeds of
>what amounts to unemployment insurance. If you've paid the taxes and you
>get into a position that you need the results, then surely it's up to
>you to decide how best to spend it?

Unemployment insurance and welfare are different programs in the US.

>Here's a question though: do politicians have to pee in bottles before
>voting in Congress etc? They're quite clearly paid out of Guvmint funds,
>and hell, one stoned Senator and a stupidly cast vote could do a lot more
>damage than anyone on welfare is likely to manage in a lifetime.

Well, it's an idea, but I really have to doubt that any legislature
would pass such a bill...

>Maybe
>you'd be better using lie detectors on 'em while you're at it. If
>they're receiving Guvmint money, the least you'd want to buy for it is
>the truth.

Well, lie detectors are more unreliable than drug tests, and besides
that, there are definite racial physiological biases in the test.  (My
psychophys teacher was black, and spent a good while talking about them.
The biases appeared to be pretty soundly researched.)

Peeve: My car is dying.  I thought if I got it to pass inspection, my
troubles would be over.  But now it's making really loud scratching
noises, and losing coolant at an alarming rate.

                                                 --Jenni
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: bberbeni@nyx.cs.du.edu (Bill Berbenich)
Subject: Re: Tall Ships Peeve
Organization: University of Denver, Dept. of Math & Comp. Sci.
Date: Thu, 23 Jul 92 18:04:46 GMT

In <16932@autodesk.COM> booter@Autodesk.COM (Elaine Richards) writes:

>As InHuman Resources Weenie and Undertaker, I pronounce you
>Self-Proclaimed Commodore of the Landlocked Desert Navy and
>Yacht Club.

Thank you.  I shall not disappoint you.

>Now you have to buy us all beers.

But of course!  And would you have any Grey Poupon?

Nautically,
   -Bill
--
"Take me down where the love honey flows,
 kiss you nice, nibble your toes."      -B-52s, Good Stuff
From: awrc@dcs.ed.ac.uk (Al Crawford)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Our dear alma mater
Date: 30 Jul 92 16:23:08 GMT
Reply-To: awrc@dcs.ed.ac.uk (Al Crawford)
Distribution: alt
Organization: The University Of Edinburgh - Department Of Computer Science

And lo, pwg@dcs.ed.ac.uk (Paul Goldberg) spake unto the masses saying:
>
> It's part of the drive to get people to write shorter theses. Take me
> for example. I ran out of ideas after 98 pages. Everyone I talk to
> seems to think that this is a Good Thing.

They're gonna just *love* my thesis then.

--
		      Al Crawford - awrc@dcs.ed.ac.uk
			   "Click click drone."
From: egpv29@castle.ed.ac.uk (JHenderson)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Cryin' baby express ... what to do?
Date: 29 Jul 92 09:12:26 GMT
Organization: Edinburgh University

In article <17297@autodesk.COM> booter@Autodesk.COM (Elaine Richards) writes:
=>In article <mcnally.712021277@wsl.pa.dec.com> mcnally@wsl.dec.com (Mike McNally) writes:
=>>
=>>There's "correcting" and there's "correcting".  The evidence is pretty
=>>convincing that direct physical punishment tends to teach children that
=>>a valid way of affecting the behavior of another person is to assault
=>>that person.
=>
=>I would say that a direct physical attack is definitely going to go
=>a long way toward altering someone's behavior, yes. 
=>
=>>
=>>Coporal punishment of children is illegal in Sweden and has been for
=>>some time.  I wonder if more and more Swedes are brats with problems?
=>
=>The rate of suicide and alchoholism is higher in Sweden. It must
=>be all those parents whose kids are driving them up the wall.

I know it's kinda boorish to bring Facts into Peevetown (check 'em at the
gate, honey) but this is an invention of Old Mr Eisenhower, and has no
basis in reality.


-- 
-Jeremy Henderson        egpv29@castle.ed.ac.uk   

(or am I?)
From: booter@Autodesk.COM (Elaine Richards)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Micro Beards (was something else entirely)
Date: 30 Jul 92 18:40:29 GMT
Organization: Autodesk, Inc., Sausalito, CA

In article <btmmnx@lynx.unm.edu> hillman@carina.unm.edu (Dan Hillman) writes:
>
>Peeve: The new (advertised on TV) "Best of the 70s" music set. The ad
>features a male and female dork in their natural habitats (phones held 
>firmly to ear, call-waiting in the background, no doubt) talking about
>this great collection of music "...from the 70s, all those *great*
>songs you've been looking for!"



Music can evoke memories. For example, if the stereo was playing
when you were deflowered, you probably would remember the song.
(In my case, God help me, it was Jethro Tull's "Aqualung".) So
there is a large demographic bulge of people who got laid to the
tune of the Bee Gee's singing "Night Fever", The Village People
singing "In the Navy", or Donna Summer singing "Hot Love".

Naturally, this stuff would be a big seller in the thirty something
crowd as they face insecurity, aging, bulging middles and growing
prostates.

Remember how our parents glowed at such martial tunes as "Boogie-Woogie
Bugle Boy"?

ER
--
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
I don't know when it was that I scratched Fate's car door, but I should have
left a note. --Tim Mefford

Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: charless@sco.COM (charles stross)
Subject: Another dental peeve
Organization: The Somewhat Contagious Operation, Inc.
Date: Tue, 21 Jul 1992 16:18:24 GMT


Today I had my final encounter with my dentist (at least, this
year's final encounter -- fingers crossed). He's extremely
good; it was totally painless, except for the final wallet
extraction (which was carried out without benefit of local
anaesthesia).

Ouch.

-- 
Charlie Stross aka charless@scol.sco.com ..... UNIX oriented text mangler
WARNING: The opinions voiced in the preceding electronic document are the
product of a warped mind. Take two before meals. Now put the following in
your sigfile: {LineEater Vaccine: Bush CIA Drugs Revolution Perot Murder}
From: JMS111@psuvm.psu.edu (Jenni Sheehey)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: "Bad Boy Club Stickers"
Date: 31 Jul 92 15:01:26 GMT
 <92209.131243CEG112@psuvm.psu.edu> <17331@autodesk.COM>
Distribution: usa
Organization: Penn State University

In article <17331@autodesk.COM>, booter@Autodesk.COM (Elaine Richards) says:
>
>Ever see the movie "Crazy People"? Its about a man who gets tossed in
>a loony bin because he decides its time to tell the truth in his
>ad campaigns. One such slogan is for Jaguar. "Buy a Jaguar so strange
>women will give you hand jobs." (Something like that)

I personally like the slogan for (I believe it was) Sony.  They showed
all of these short Japanese people working with their faces close to the
tables and the circuits they were working on.  (and there was more, but
I forget what) and then they had the slogan:

Sony.  Because caucasians are just too da*n tall.

>Since I am only human, I have stuff on my car to warn people off.
>I have a Christian fish with feet and the word "DARWIN" inside.

This brings to mind that I have occasionally toyed with the idea of
putting some Christian thing on my car.  Then, I think about how I
behave when I drive.  I'm not sure that the "Well, get your a*s out of
the middle of the road, then!" would come better from a person driving a
car with a "Jesus Loves You" bumper sticker on it.

Peeve/!Peeve: My decision in the matter is made easier by the fact that
all Christian bumper stickers are inane and annoying.

All you can tell from my car is that I'm a PSU employee (from my parking
permit) and that I've been at Penn State since at least '86 (from the
bumper sticker about our winning the national college football
championship that year.) With that on my car, I feel free to be as rude
as possible.  Obviously.

                                                 --Jenni
From: fofp@castle.ed.ac.uk (M Holmes)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: hypocritical Guvmints
Date: 23 Jul 92 16:48:31 GMT
Distribution: alt
Organization: Edinburgh University

tjc@castle.ed.ac.uk (A J Cunningham) writes:

[.....some slagging off of Yours Truly which I thought was Jeremy's job.]

>Peeve: People who call themselves libertarians and then proceed to
>whinge that they aren't getting enough money from the guvmint. Get a
>real job, Mike, one that creates wealth in the economy. As things stand
>your claims to being a taxpayer are a joke. Your a drain on this
>country. The sooner the likes of you lot are sold off to the private
>sector and turned into theme parks for the plebs the better.

Peeve: converts.

I'm one of the very few people around here who do in fact advocate
privatising education. Still, you have a point......

Anyway, now that you've sold the Flat From Hell, I want my contribution
to your mortgage relief back....

>Tony Cunningham, Insignia Solutions. 				   tjc@ed.ac.uk

FoFP
From: fofp@castle.ed.ac.uk (M Holmes)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Drug testing and welfare
Date: 30 Jul 92 14:31:20 GMT
Organization: Edinburgh University



>In article <1992Jul27.184207.1@husky1.stmarys.ca> cs226a030@husky1.stmarys.ca writes:
>>
>>The truth is, some druge are *highly* addictive (cocaine and crack) for
>>example. And whether or not someone wants to do something illegal is
>>irrelevant. Illegal is illegal.

Illegal is a sick bird.

"Unlawful" might be a better description.

FoFP
From: melindac@thedarktower.Corp.Sun.COM (Ugga de Boogidie)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: re worthless servants
Date: 22 Jul 1992 17:43:46 GMT
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Inc.  Mt. View, Ca.
Reply-To: melindac@thedarktower.Corp.Sun.COM (Ugga de Boogidie)
NNTP-Posting-Host: thedarktower.corp.sun.com


In a similar vein ...

!Peeve: Shopping. Shopping for new sunglasses for my vacation.

Peeve: Bored, disinterested saleschick.

!Peeve: Immediately sensing her attitude, I proceeded to try on
        20 more pairs, then went back to the very first one I
	tried on, told her to put it on hold and I *might* come
	back for it later.

!!Peeve: The look on the saleschick's face. HA!

	Heh heh heh,

	  Melinda
From: dab@ism.isc.com (David A. Butterfield)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Drug testing and welfare
Date: 29 Jul 1992 00:12:14 GMT
Organization: x
Distribution: world
NNTP-Posting-Host: change

Jenni Sheehey <JMS111@psuvm.psu.edu> writes:
>Well, given the fact that the bill doesn't propose to put anyone in
>jail, but merely force them to get treatment...

I didn't see where it "forced" them to get treatment.  Rather, it
looked to me like the bill was set up in such a way as to cut off
their welfare payments.  All that means is that they will henceforth
steal directly from individuals, rather than having the government
do it for them.  It's not clear to me that that's an improvement.

-- 
                     Vote for *anybody* but Quayle!
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: serget@syma.sussex.ac.uk (Serge A Thill)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Drug testing and welfare
Date: 31 Jul 92 08:34:23 GMT
Organization: University of Sussex

fofp@castle.ed.ac.uk (M Holmes):
: jonathan@mantis.co.uk (Jonathan Egre'):
: >fofp@castle.ed.ac.uk (M Holmes);
: >> No, just that the Guvmint shouldn't be handling [welfare]. Folks could 
: >> take out unemployment insurance. 
: 
: >Is this supposed to be serious?  Do you seriously expect insurance companies
: >to grant affordable unemployment insurance policies to the sort of people 
: >who are likely to become unemployed?
: 
: If they're "the sort of people who are likely to become unemployed" then
: no. But *that* is exactly those folks problem and it's time they took
: responsibility for fixing it. That means acquiring a marketable skill of 
: some sort which essentuially means investing some work/time/money in 
: themselves.


           Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.


Sob.


...


AntiPeeve: It's not my country, so in principle I shouldn't have to
worry.

Peeve: It is very difficult not to be worried by such schemes of thought.

Therefore, and with apologies to people looking for decent peeves:

Me thinks that quote those folks unquote are unemployed precisely because 
they were not able to fix that problem, or in some cases because they 
did not want to fix it. For those who don't want, it is possible to force 
them to work. Some totalitarian states succeeded quite well in doing that. 
However they had more difficulties to make them do any useful work. (and btw,
the same counted for the rest of the population). Another common side-effect 
was that life in these places was mostly not very pleasant. Hunger, on the 
other hand, does not make people work. It makes them steal, rob and loot. 
And kill too. Not to think about the kids of those people. Considering that,
I find a decent welfare system a pretty good deal. And certainly better than
investing equivalent amounts of money into a police state. Because, in case
you don't know, there are places in the world where the state does not have 
to invest huge amounts of money into the police simply because people don't 
feel the need to rob, riot, etc ...

Now for those who want to work. Sure that the right thing for them to do
is to acquire skills. But what do you do when there is no reasonable offer of 
skills to be learned? Because that offer is restricted to people who can afford
to pay for it or who come from the appropriate cultural background. Too much
people excluded from that chance in this country. 

It is not only quote those people's problem unquote. Just watch the state
of the economy here in Britain. I recently came accross a long term economic 
growth statistic (1955 to 1987), comparing 17 OECD countries (in the FT.)
Britain figured seventeenth. And things have hardly improved here since 1987.
My guess is that this won't change until good education is offered. To
everybody.

'Nuf said.

Ps. I wonder whether I should follow the example of that other guy and
stop reading news.

--
The PsTerrorist. (In memoriam and just this time)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: derich@netcom.com (Scott A. Steinbrink)
Subject: My pet peeve....
Date: Wed, 29 Jul 92 20:54:07 GMT
Organization: Netcom - Online Communication Services  (408 241-9760 guest) 
Summary: peeve
Keywords: peeve

My pet peeve is other people posting about their pet peeves...

- Scott

-- 
NetCom: Derich@netcom.com
CompuServe: 76106.2055@CompuServe.Com
America Online: Derichman

Paranoid schizophrenics outnumber their enemies at least two to one.
"Deaf people can do anything except hear" - I. King Jordan
From: donb@igor.tamri.com (Don Baldwin)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: radio stuff
Date: 23 Jul 92 20:03:50 GMT
Distribution: na
Organization: TOSHIBA America MRI, South San Francisco, CA

In article <35977@sdcc12.ucsd.edu> kprashan@sdcc3.ucsd.edu (hyderabadi) writes:
>>[whining about the practices of commercial radio stations mercifully excised]
>> 
>> Take responsibility for your life, if you have one. Otherwise GET ONE NOW!
>> Nolan "Grandpa Grumble" Hinshaw
>
>Looky here, dude, this group was created for whining and
>complaining about anything that bugs us. So you keep complaining
>about whiners and I will keep writing about what I feel like.

Wrongo, you weenie.  You haven't a CLUE what this newsgroup is for.  Let
me provide one...open your mouth and say "Ah".

You see, whining is a particularly mindless and unproductive activity.
It accomplishes nothing and gets on our nerves.  Peeving is something
different than whining.

Whining is something you do when someone steals your lunch.

Peeving is something you do when he steals your lunch and you complain
about it, while building a sandwich filled with serum of ipecac the
next day.

Whining is something 19 year-old guys with acne do, when they can't get
laid.

Peeving is something the same guys do when they're having problems
getting laid and they stay at home reading the Joy of Sex.  Next thing
you know, a coed takes a chance on them and ends up telling all her
friends about the 17 explosive orgasms she had.  

You see a difference, chucklehead?  Peeving means that you've at least
tried real hard to find a solution to the problem you're complaining
about, instead of merely yammering to a support group about it.

    don
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"He who molds public sentiment goes deeper than he who enacts statutes or
pronounces decisions.  He makes statutes or decisions possible or impossible
to execute."
        - Abraham Lincoln during the Lincoln-Douglas debates
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Don Baldwin  -  Software Engineer  - e-mail to:  donb@tamri.com
From: egev05@castle.ed.ac.uk (B A Page)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Oh, and one more. . .
Date: 22 Jul 92 12:06:09 GMT
Organization: Edinburgh University

In article <39554@skye.dcs.ed.ac.uk> Not_Al_Crawford@ed.ac.uk (Not Al Crawford) writes:

>You sure about that? Isn't it the case that if you spelt your name Cloudio
>instead of Claudio, people would get considerably closer to your name than
>they do now?

May I suggest "Clowdio" as a less ambiguous alternative?

Babs
From: potler@umbc4.umbc.edu (Laura Potler (GSFC))
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Peevingsong
Date: 30 Jul 92 19:35:45 GMT
Distribution: alt
Organization: University of Maryland Baltimore Campus

In article <24349@castle.ed.ac.uk> fofp@castle.ed.ac.uk (M Holmes) writes:
>Now gather round folks, I'm gonna sing you a song
>Now I know what you're thinking but it won't take long
>I'm sure to be finished 'fore the Sun goes down
>The song's about a place and it's called.... Peevetown
>
>Chorus:
>
>So if you can't get your motor past a BDI
>Or you're sat next to a kid that you know is gonna cry
>Maybe the guy at the front, he's just takin' too long
>Just remember the motto "I'm right and you're wrong!"
>
>etc.

it *almost* fits to the beverly hillbillies!

-l "black gold... texas tea..." p
-- 
-lp  ****************************************************************
*    "i may make you feel but i can't make you think" --Jethro Tull *
*********************************************************************
From: banta@blagg.Eng.Sun.COM (242 lbs before cooking)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: National Situational Awareness Day
Date: 22 Jul 1992 15:06:31 GMT
Organization: Sun, Moon, and Stars
NNTP-Posting-Host: blagg

Claudio.Terrorist@ed.ac.uk (ObTerrorist) writes:
>to do something. "3.04" says the display. I hand him a 10 pounds note.
[ ... ]
>[ supervisor goes away, CWCR copies the figures "1" "0" "." "0" "0" on
>his keyboard. Display says: "Change: 7.96" ]

Wow.  I think I could get used to this European math.  Or was this a
Baker's 10 pounds note?

drew
banta@abingdon.sun.com
--
"I'll perfrom any perverse sexual act on any member of phylum
chordata.  I don't do invertebrates."  - JZ
Newsgroups: alt.peeves