From: smithw@col.hp.com (Walter Smith)
Subject: Re: Oprah 11/19
Date: Fri, 20 Nov 1992 04:07:00 GMT
Organization: Colorado Springs IT Center

(This is from my wife, using my account...it's her first time using
USENET, so cut her some slack...)

I, too, watched Oprah today and continue to be amazed at how intolerant
people can be of others just because of their sexual orientation.  As a
mother of four, I don't understand how any parent could turn their back
on their child just because of who their child is.  I confess that I am
ignorant when it comes to understanding what makes some people a "four-
leaf clover, when most are three."  (Oprah's analogy for gay vs. straight
orientation.)  Therefore, I would like to ask a couple of probably really
dumb questions, but please believe me that I am sincere and only ask
because I do care about other people and have a desire to understand.  So,
1) I believe that whether a person is gay or straight depends on genetics.
Therefore, when a person is born, it has already been determined...being
gay is not "learned behavior that one can change" as the religious fanatics
would have us believe.  Is this belief correct?  2) During the Oprah episode,
several "straight" individuals accused a couple of lesbians on the show of
really wanting to be men since they chose to dress or "act" like most people
think men should behave.  My question then is:  Like a heterosexual relation-
ship, do homosexual relationships generally have male and female roles...the
more dominant individual portraying a male role?

Before I get crucified, I would like to explain that I was brought up in a
religious cult-type environment where I was taught that being homosexual was
evil and that God hated this behavior.  Luckily, I broke away from this
situation about five years ago, when I was thirty.  I have never really
felt that God would hate someone who is different.  In fact, Jesus said we
should love everyone and professed Christians should learn from Jesus'
example that it is wrong to hate...we are all brothers (and sisters).  I
continue to defend anyone who is looked down upon for being different than
society dictates.  What I am getting at is that I really want to understand.
I know that being gay is far more than a sexual preference....heterosexuals
will say the same thing.  It is who they are; it is their life.  I really
don't have any gay friends (or maybe I do, but just aren't aware).

If anyone would like to respond to my questions, I would appreciate it.
Again, my questions (though probably ignorant) are sincere.  By the way,
my family and I have lived in Colorado Springs for just a few months.  I
can't believe how intolerant people are here of others.  We are from the
East coast where people seem to be more open-minded.  The religious
influence here (with all the "Christians" groups who seem to be rather
self-righteous) is a little hard to take.  Since being involved with that
cult I mentioned above, I still haven't found any group that I wish to be
part of.  I do believe in God -- a God who loves everyone for the person
he/she is...what they believe in their hearts and how they treat others.
If you know of a group who subscribes to this belief, please do let me know.




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