HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: silver@xrtll.uucp (Hi Ho Silver)
Subject: Re: apology
Organization: What you won't find on my desk.
Date: Sat, 7 Nov 1992 02:04:52 GMT

Sayeth gj@prg.oxford.ac.uk (Craig Shergold):
$ )  Indeed.  There was a time when the phrase "That is the end of the news,"
$(   uttered in a crisp RP accent with plenty of static on the side, would
$ )  send me into indescribable epiphanies.  An aural orgasm.  Heaven in
$(   a little grey box.

   My girlfriend has RP.  Does this mean she should have a different
accent than I do?

silver "I'll vouch for the orgasm part, though"
-- 
|I know that sometimes my jaw clicks when I eat.  Void where prohibited.|
|Have you seen this boy?  Lust never sleeps.  I say hurl.  Honey, I'm   |
|home. _________________________________________________________________|
|_____/ silver@bokonon.UUCP    ...!{uunet|becker|xrtll}!bokonon!silver  |
From: mdm@sparc2.prime.com (Michael D. McAfee)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: short shameful xmas confession
Date: 10 Nov 92 04:41:31 GMT
Organization: Computervision


	my dad has a cooler xmas wish list than I do

	Michael, the Chaotic
	disclaimer:  eleven words, and you want to make a legal case?  Oy!
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: richh@netcom.com (richh)
Subject: City Driving Observation #27
Organization: Netcom - Online Communication Services  (408 241-9760 guest) 
X-Guy-I-Was-Driving-With:  blu@cellar.org
Date: Tue, 10 Nov 1992 16:41:03 GMT

"If the lights are timed for 35, they're also timed for 70."

RICHH
From: jdavidso@nextwork.rose-hulman.edu
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: highway riding
Date: 5 Nov 1992 17:21:23 GMT
Organization: Computer Science Department at Rose-Hulman
Distribution: world
Reply-To: jdavidso@nextwork.rose-hulman.edu
NNTP-Posting-Host: jd-next.nextwork.rose-hulman.edu

In article <rv81hbg@zola.esd.sgi.com> cj@eno.esd.sgi.com (C J Silverio)  
writes:
> {stuff that is very true, but deleted}

Now, aren't you glad you took that safety course, C J?

The complete and utter cluelessness of some drivers out there never ceases  
to amaze me.

Maybe you need to look more like a real bad motorcycle type; my now-ex  
brother-in-law (who looks like the prototype Hell's Angel) says he never  
has that kind of problem. Heh. One look at this guy, and I can completely  
understand that.
--
************************************************************************
 the Lost Cause                       jdavidso@nextwork.rose-hulman.edu
(hardwaire guy extraordinaire)       MACTech,NeXTtech; NeXTmail accepted
                      "Everything is relative."
************************************************************************
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,alt.drugs
From: mdw@theory.TC.Cornell.EDU (Matt Welsh)
Subject: Re: My Favorite Molecule (or, Short Shameful Addiction)
Organization: Cornell Theory Center
Date: Tue, 10 Nov 1992 18:08:12 GMT

In article <1992Nov10.142050.10383@murdoch.acc.Virginia.EDU> rwd4f@poe.acc.Virginia.EDU (Rob Dobson) writes:
>In article <1992Nov10.051228.27301@tc.cornell.edu> mdw@theory.TC.Cornell.EDU (Matt Welsh) writes:
>
>>m (twelve cokes a day) dw
>
>you drink that vile sugar water and you call yourself a caffiene junky?
>oh PLEASE. You might as well drink Parapectolin (Diarreaha Medicine) for
>the trace amounts of opium it contains and call yourself a real junky.
>those 12 cokes a day only have ~3-4 cups of decent coffee's worth of
>caffeine. and coffee only stains your teeth yellow as opposed to rotting
>them away.

Okay, I lied. Actually it's Dr. Pepper.

Plus I have low tolerance.

mmm mm d  www
shaky

-- 
Matt Welsh    mdw@tc.cornell.edu        +1 607 253 2737
Systems Programmer, Cornell Theory Center
  "She's like jelly roll, like sculpture!"
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: jfw@jfwhome.FUNHOUSE.COM (John F. Woods)
Subject: Re: My early Christmas present to you all.
Organization: Misanthropes-R-Us
Date: Wed, 11 Nov 1992 23:53:40 GMT

In <6938@ac13.cs.nps.navy.mil> rpwhite@taurus.cs.nps.navy.mil (rpwhite) writes:
>)Jon Gefaell writes:
>)|rpwhite writes:
>)|Well, they say the proof of the pudding is in the eating so let's see you
>)|offer Roger Carasso (carasso@inference.com) an account.
>)Oh, so who is this Roger Carrusso? The Banished CPU dude? Whoever he
>)is, if he's interested in an account, perhaps he could be given one.
>======================================================================
>Then we verify:
>finger carasso@turing.org
>[turing.org] 
>Login name: carasso   			In real life: Roger Carasso
>last login Mon Nov  9 12:19 on pts/1 from FOURIER.INFERENC
>=====================================================================

I think it stunningly appropriate that Roger now has an account on a site
that would happily accept the Butthead CPU kid.  Maybe we can get the B-CPU
turd an account there, too, so that Roger will be too busy raving in
"Newsgroups: general" to bother us.
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: rwd4f@poe.acc.Virginia.EDU (Rob Dobson)
Subject: Short Shamful Anxiety
Organization: University of Virginia
Date: Mon, 9 Nov 1992 16:38:02 GMT


you know, guys (can i call you 'guys'? i think of you as my friendz!@!)
sometimes when the world seems a bit too weird for me and i am wrapped
up in a blanket on the couch muttering obscenities to myself, i find
myself wishing that real life was more like Chutes and Ladders and all
those other super-cutesy board games where nothing really bad ever 
happens.
From: sgparker@eos.ncsu.edu (SCOTT GRAHAM PARKERSON)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Stupid costume ideas
Date: 9 Nov 92 15:35:21 GMT
Reply-To: sgparker@eos.ncsu.edu (SCOTT GRAHAM PARKERSON)
Organization: CSC/COE NCSU, Raleigh, NC
Originator: sgparker@c00748-400wi.eos.ncsu.edu


In article <1992Nov5.165835.644@ultb.isc.rit.edu>,
adw3345@ultb.isc.rit.edu (A.D. Williams) writes:

|> For my costume I dressed up as Spatula Man. I wore a jogging suit with
|>about a dozen spatulas taped on. I got the spatulas at "Everything's
|>A Dollar", in which everything sold in the store is, surprisingly, a
|>buck each. Sometimes it's two for a buck. But it's cool, because 
|>"Everything's a Dollar" includes the sales tax, so when I bought
|>12 spatulas, by golly, I spent 12 dollars, even. With my Spatula Man
|>costume I wore my ski mask, but I had to take it off because it
|>got all slimy with spit and sweat.
|>
|>
|>                                                       Derrick
|>
|>Now I suppose someone's going to do a text-search-replace replacing
|>"spatula" with "speculum" now.

Worse than that, actually:

For my costume I dressed up as Toaster Man. I wore a jogging suit with
about a dozen toasters taped on. I got the toasters at "Everything's
A Dollar", in which everything sold in the store is, surprisingly, a
buck each. Sometimes it's two for a buck. But it's cool, because 
"Everything's a Dollar" includes the sales tax, so when I bought
12 toasters, by golly, I spent 12 dollars, even. With my Toaster Man
costume I wore my ski mask, but I had to take it off because it
got all slimy with spit and sweat.

Custom-Made Croutons at your request.  
-- 
   -/\-   sgparker@eos.ncsu.edu           |  I don't
  /|  |\  Scott Graham Parkerson          |  need no
  \|  |/  Sophomore, Computer Science     |  stinkin'
   -\/-   North Carolina State University |  quote...
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: fulton@silver.ucs.indiana.edu (Ben Fulton)
Subject: Re: 1:21 12:24
Organization: Indiana University
Date: Fri, 13 Nov 1992 16:56:20 GMT

In <BxnyGq.L2@usenet.ucs.indiana.edu> fulton@silver.ucs.indiana.edu (Ben Fulton) writes:

>Should I?

>What the hell.

>"I'm not an actor, but I play one on TV"

HAW HAW HAW
GET IT???@#
EVERYONE ON TV IS AN ACTOR!
HAW HAW JUST LIKE POTATOE!@!# HAW! I GET IT.

HAW HAW HAW
YOU BEN FULTON ARE NO MATT WELSH!

-- 
ben
fulton@silver.ucs.indiana.edu
Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent.
Government is sanctioned violence.
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,rec.pets.birds
From: mdw@theory.TC.Cornell.EDU (Matt Welsh)
Subject: Re: How to kill chickens with your computer...
Organization: Cornell Theory Center
Date: Fri, 13 Nov 1992 22:23:55 GMT

In article <1992Nov13.134921.1730@guvax.acc.georgetown.edu> troberts@guvax.acc.georgetown.edu writes:
>From the help menu of Borland's Turbo C/C++ for DOS.
>
>        See Also:
>         delay    sound
>                
>        Example:
>        /* Emits a 7-Hz tone for 10 seconds.
>                                           
>         True story: 7 Hz is the resonant 
>         frequency of a chicken's skull cavity.
>         This was determined empirically in
>         Australia, where a new factory
>         generating 7-Hz tones was located too
>         close to a chicken ranch: When the 
>         factory started up, all the chickens
>         died. 
>
>         Your PC may not be able to emit a 7-Hz tone. */  

         /* If not, just use an axe. */
>                                    
>        int main(void)             
>        {                 
>           sound(7);     
>           delay(10000);

         /* 10 seconds should be long enough to waste 'em! */

>           nosound();   
>        }              

Obviously, Borland is condoning the sonic slaughtering of chickens by
releasing this program as an example in it help files.

mdw

Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: phil@eos.arc.nasa.gov (Phil Stone)
Subject: Re: highway riding
Organization: NASA Ames Res. Ctr, Calif.
Date: Thu, 5 Nov 1992 20:48:29 GMT

In article <Bx80xK.AH8@mentor.cc.purdue.edu> ata@sage.cc.purdue.edu (ata boy) writes:
>In article <rv81hbg@zola.esd.sgi.com> cj@sgi.com (C J Silverio) writes:
>> They cut me off so they could change three lanes in one swerve.
>
>I'll be working on my aim.  Next time I won't miss.
>
>ata boy

Say, Duh, what's your favorite brand of spark plug?  From what I've
heard from other braindead cagers who thought it would be a cute idea
to attempt (or even fake an attempt at) vehicular homicide on a
motorcyclist, I'd recommend Bosch.  The smaller insulator allows for
easier, ah, installation, and won't tickle your colon quite as much as
other brands.  Remember to specify a heat range while you're at it.

Don't worry, Duh.  There's very little probability of you finding
your miniscule pudendum brazed to the drag pipes of a Harley Shovelhead
at any point in the near future.

The Denizens of Doom would be loath to screw up good chrome, y'know.


		Phil (p.s. fuck you and your gleethead lame-duck prez)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: hamlet@ravel.udel.edu (Chris Adams)
Subject: Re: S S C
Followup-To: hell	 
Organization: University of Delaware
Date: Mon, 9 Nov 1992 22:24:47 GMT


shippensburg state college

(which, conveniently enough, 
 is also short and shameful)

Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: jcarroll@ferris.cray.com (Jeff Carroll)
Subject: Re: highway riding
Originator: jcarroll@ferris
Organization: Cray Research, Inc.
Date: 5 Nov 92 22:41:17 CST


In article <josh.721004487@mowgli>, josh@cqs.washington.edu (Josh Hayes) writes:
> This calls for 
> 
> JAH's Law of Freeway Driving:
> 
> If you leave adequate distance between your vehicle and the
> vehicle in front of you, someone will put their vehicle into
> that space, requiring you to back off, so someone can put
> their vehicle into THAT space, requiring you to reach 
> behind the seat and get out that bazooka that you've been
> saving for just such an occasion.
> 
> Even in Seattle this happens. But only at around ten miles
> an hour.
> 
> 	-JAH

Oh, bullshit. I've had to tailgate people into Snohomish County at 60+ mph
to keep some unlicensed a****** from Rat City from cutting me off and
forcing me onto the shoulder.
Xref: sparky talk.bizarre:37448 alt.flame:14545
From: polar@top.cis.syr.edu (Polar Humenn)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,alt.flame
Subject: Re: i say kill bush
Keywords: die
Date: 9 Nov 92 19:23:48 GMT
Organization: Syracuse University, CIS Dept.

In article <1992Nov5.145440.16759@murdoch.acc.Virginia.EDU> rwd4f@poe.acc.Virginia.EDU (Rob Dobson) writes:
>In article <1992Nov5.134019.24660@oz.plymouth.edu> m_lehoul@oz.plymouth.edu (Michael L. Le Houllier) writes:
>>In article <1992Nov5.063938.11566@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> pfinerty@nyx.cs.du.edu (big daddy hate box) writes:
>>>i want bush's head on a pike stuck in my front lawn. fucker. i hate that
>>>man more than anyone i don't know personally. i want quayle to be pres for
>>>a couple of weeks and then we kill him and let foley do it for a while.
>>>then we kill him too and give it to baker. yeah, i say we take the
>>>opportunity to really fuck with D.C. 
>>
>>If this is indicative of Clinton supporters, this nation's in worse
>>shape than I thought.
>
>
>well, thats one hell of a pearle of wisdom, asswipe. why did you post
>this valuable knowledge into misc.test? besides, as you might notice by
>the lack of the word 'clinton' in the article, pjf is, like me, a 
>bush hater, and no big fan of clinton. in fact, the bush's head on a
>pike image has been with me for a while too.
>>
>>-- 
>> Michael Le Houllier           *  John 3:16  * Nov 12, 1991 - Dili      
>> (m_lehoul@oz.plymouth.edu.us) *  Remember: June 4, 1989 - Beijing
>> GO BLUE JAYS!!!   BEAT THE BRAVES!!!!
>> ANNOY THE MEDIA.  RE-ELECT BUSH!!
>
>
>ISNT about time to change your sig, dork?
>the blue jays won
>bush lost
>
>NOW DIE ASSWIPE
>
>

Now, Now, do you know it's illegal to threaten the life of the president?
Geez, you guys are now on some list in Washington.  I'd start looking for
blue suits and sunglasses hanging around your towns.
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: thinman@netcom.com (Technically Sweet)
Subject: rapture is me
Organization: International Foundation for Internal Freedom
Date: Fri, 6 Nov 1992 07:24:14 GMT

It is absolutely no surprise to me that Carasso disappeared
from Netcom on Rapture day.  

No surprise at all.
-- 

Lance Norskog

Data is not information is not knowledge is not wisdom.
From: tgpt_ltd@uhura.cc.rochester.edu (Tom Guptill)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: why I love SGI
Date: 5 Nov 92 21:02:41 GMT
Organization: University of Rochester - Rochester, New York

In <3LqRTB20w165w@mantis.co.uk> mathew@mantis.co.uk (mathew) writes:

>I have a cheap PC running Clipper.  Will that do?

Weren't you listening?  He insisted on a large color monitor.  You'll need a
CGA card with composite video output and a 21" colour TV.  (40 column
output, of course.)  

Tom.  (I have a cheap PC with an MDA running slowly.  Will that do?)

-- 
|Tom Guptill           | tgpt_ltd@uhura.cc.rochester.edu  (internet)  |
|CPU Box 277445 U of R |  "    " @db1.cc.rochester.edu (alt internet) |
|Rochester, NY 14627   |  "    " @uordbv (bitnet)                     |
|(716) 274-0156        | (if mail to uhura fails, try db1 or uordbv)  |
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: gerald@torolab4.vnet.ibm.com (Gerald Oskoboiny)
Subject: Re: Funny Ears
Originator: gerald@gerald
Date:  6 Nov 92 20:15:55 GMT
Reply-To: gerald@torolab4.vnet.ibm.com
Organization: IBM Canada Ltd.
Followup-To: talk.bizarre,misc.test,rec.music.early
Keywords: rot13

mdw@theory.TC.Cornell.EDU (Matt Welsh) writes:

> gerald@torolab4.vnet.ibm.com writes:
>> my ears are not the right shape to hold the ear
>>pieces.
>>What is my recourse? Sincerely,
>
>Super glue. And stop setting followups to misc.test.

Thanks for the advice, but I've found something less gooey.

Gerald -paper clips
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: mdw@theory.TC.Cornell.EDU (Matt Welsh)
Subject: Re: highway riding
Organization: Cornell Theory Center
Date: Sat, 7 Nov 1992 04:25:12 GMT

In article <1992Nov7.034030.22341@wetware.com> mlegare@wetware.com (The Steel General's Batsman) writes:
>don,
>
>dear don
>
>DEAR don,

[and so on...]

This would be much more dramatic with a form feed (^L) in between the
first "dear don" and the second "DEAR don". 

mdw

-- 
Matt Welsh    mdw@tc.cornell.edu        +1 607 253 2737
Systems Programmer, Cornell Theory Center
  "She's like jelly roll, like sculpture!"
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: gary@sci34hub.sci.com (Gary Heston)
Subject: Re: why I love SGI
Reply-To: gary@sci34hub.sci.com (Gary Heston)
Organization: SCI Systems, Inc., Huntsville, Al.
Date: Fri, 13 Nov 1992 15:08:47 GMT

In article <BxKt4K.6BM@jfwhome.FUNHOUSE.COM> jfw@jfwhome.FUNHOUSE.COM (John F. Woods) writes:
|In <schnitzi.721417007@eola.cs.ucf.edu> schnitzi@cs.ucf.edu (Mark Schnitzius) writes:
|>dlwilson@fenix.encore.com (David L Wilson) writes:
|>>Encore's doing fine, thank you, supplying 88000-based multiprocessors to
|>>anyone who wants one.  One nice thing about that is there is no shortage
|>>of computing power.  I have an 8 processor mini, with 1M of cache, 128M
|>>of memory and a 1.2gig disk to call my own.  Mine, all mine!!  
|>Great.  Yet another DiskSizeWar.

|And with such a *TINY* machine, too.

Ahhhh, machines don't cut it anymore. It's *networks* that matter.
The more servers you control, the more hosts you have the root 
password for; that's what counts.

7 servers, 3 hosts, and about 6.6GB of disc, not counting any of
the user dweebs' machines. (If I wanted to count the WIP on the
manufacturing line, that'd be another 500 systems with between
200 and 500MB *each*). 

Being an admin has it's advantages....


-- 
Gary Heston    SCI Systems, Inc.  gary@sci34hub.sci.com   site admin
The Chairman of the Board and the CFO speak for SCI. I'm neither.
"Data sheet: HSN-3000 Nuclear Event Detector. The [NED] senses the gamma
radiation pulse [from a] nuclear weapon." As if we wouldn't notice...
From: sme3@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu (SCOTT MATTHEW ESTRIN)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: short shameful xmas confession
Date: 13 Nov 92 14:37:18 GMT
Organization: Lehigh University

>>      my dad has a cooler xmas wish list than I do
>>
>>      Michael, the Chaotic
>
>    Steal it.

Kill him.  Inherit what's on his list, plus keep your own.
But of course you'll have to stage the murder so Santa Claus won't find out
and think you were a bad boy this year.
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: mdw@theory.TC.Cornell.EDU (Matt Welsh)
Subject: Re: sore hands
Organization: Cornell Theory Center
Date: Fri, 13 Nov 1992 23:08:29 GMT

In rec.juggling cdm006@email.mot.com (Dick Magerl) writes:
>My problem is this: The handles of these things are wrapped with black
>vinyl electrical tape and are quite HARD. After a few tosses, my hands are
>quite
>sore becasue of the slapping of the clubs in my palms. My hands at one time
>were bruised so bad they were black and blue. 
>
>Am I the only one with this problem?
>Will I eventually develop calluses (or what have you) if I stick with this
>long enough?
>
>I've somewhat relieved the problem by wearing a pair of bicycling gloves
>which have no fingers and are padded in the palm. They look kinda dumb
>though.

I'm glad he's talking about juggling.

mdw
From: tgpt_ltd@uhura.cc.rochester.edu (Tom Guptill)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Did you ever ask yourself why?
Date: 7 Nov 92 00:41:20 GMT
Organization: University of Rochester (Rochester, NY)

->	Host: dartvax.dartmouth.edu
	Machine: Sun-4/280
	System: UNIX			<-

DEC would be proud...

Tom.  (Who always wondered why he logged into a Sun w/ a vt100.)


-- 
| Tom Guptill           | tgpt_ltd@cc.rochester.edu (internet) |
| CPU Box 277445 U of R | tgpt_ltd@uordbv (bitnet)             |
| Rochester NY 14627    |                                      |
| (716) 274-0156        |                                      |
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: aaron@space.ualberta.ca (Aaron Humphrey)
Subject: Get rid of--Spider
Reply-To: aaron@space.ualberta.ca
Organization: University Of Alberta, Edmonton Canada
X-Newsreader: TIN [version 1.1 PL6]
Date: Thu, 12 Nov 1992 04:07:07 GMT

Some of you may be familiar with The Spider, of pulp comics fame.  He was a
crimefighter, in the days before superheroes took over the field.  His
trademark was the spider ring he wore, and he had perfected a peculiar fist-
fighting technique which was guaranteed to leave a livid spider imprint on the
face of anyone he slugged to unconsciousness.

What is less well-known is that The Spider is based on two somewhat less
successful crimefighters.  One of them had a similar trademark ring, but
instead of the fearsome spider mark, it was adorned with a happy face, which
left its mark on his hapless victims.

The other did indeed wear spider-adorned jewelry, but earrings rather than a
ring.  He had no arms, but he still managed to leave his spider imprint in his
foes, whom he disabled with his unique style of head-fighting.  It was never
revealed how he got his earrings in.

--
---Alfvaen(Canadian SF Quasi-Activist)
"It's not my fault.  The orchestra has disappeared."
   ---Hector Berlioz
Current Album--George Harrison:Gone Troppo
Current Read--Jack McDevitt:The Hercules Text
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: jfw@jfwhome.FUNHOUSE.COM (John F. Woods)
Subject: Re: Where Can I Find Full Spectrum Lighting?
Organization: Misanthropes-R-Us
Date: Wed, 11 Nov 1992 01:24:48 GMT

In misc.consumers.house fredch@phx.mcd.mot.com (Fred Christiansen) writes:
>Can anyone give me source(s) for full spectrum lights, either
>incandescent or fluorescent (preferably both)?

please post the answers.  most of the
light sources i've investigated have
been seriously lacking in x and gamma
radiation, to say nothing of the
irritating gaps in the microwave region.
fortunately, the lab roof is transparent
to cosmic radiation (despite the risks),
so lights covering that end of the
spectrum are superfluous.

		asst. decorator to mr x
		(i light up artificial life)
From: operjfw@HYDRA.ROSE-HULMAN.EDU
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: snakes and ladders
Date: 13 Nov 1992 15:14:12 GMT
Organization: Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology
Reply-To: operjfw@HYDRA.ROSE-HULMAN.EDU
NNTP-Posting-Host: hydra.rose-hulman.edu

Someone, once said that people are basically
evil. This is almost true. However, more
clearly stated, people are basically good,
it's just that I'm so evil I bring the average
way down.

Sex, drugs and talk.bizarre
From: rkatos@hpunila.MSR.HP.COM (Ray Katos)
Date: Mon, 2 Nov 1992 15:39:19 GMT
Subject: PEROT DAUGHTER PIX
Organization: Hewlett Packard Sales, Naperville IL
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre

PEROT DAUGHTER PIX
I am so disappointed in the Internet. In the many years of faithfully
reading and answering I make one lousy request:

	   WHERE IS THE PHOTO OF PEROT'S DAUGHTER?

I would expect it to be posted in at least twenty different news groups.
Life would be worth living again.
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: waterman@chaos.cs.brandeis.edu (T.S. Waterman)
Subject: Re: i want my own group
Reply-To: waterman@cs.brandeis.edu
Organization: CAVEAT Labs, Inc.
Date: Wed, 11 Nov 1992 19:33:50 GMT

kschnitz@encore.com (Kevin Schnitzius) writes:

>pfinerty@nyx.cs.du.edu (big daddy hate box) writes:
>>i think i should have my own group. i think it should be something like;
>>alt.busted-big-time.finerty

>Don't get too excited.  The FBI/CIA/NSA aren't that smart.  They still 
>don't have a news feed, but they do have guns.  Go figure.

 BBBZZZZT!:  Survey says: "Uh...  duh. I don't really know.   Sorry."

 While the correct answer is:
      they have more newfeed than you could piss on.

--ts	You don't want to fuck with these people.
	They don't believe in you, either.
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: gerald@torolab4.vnet.ibm.com (Gerald Oskoboiny)
Subject: Gerald amuses himself
Originator: gerald@gerald
Date: 10 Nov 92 05:59:23 GMT
Reply-To: gerald@torolab4.vnet.ibm.com
Organization: IBM Canada Ltd.
Followup-To: talk.bizarre,misc.test,rec.music.jazz
Keywords: rot13

OK. It's 1am, and I'm still at work. The place is deserted, except for
janitors here and there, so I am free to poot-poot and make other noise
to my heart's content. I've been experimenting with mouth noises, so far
I can do a cat meowing and a rat squeaking. I am also able to maintain a
single squeaking noise for over 2 mins by breathing through my nose. Cool.
Unfotrunately, I began to hyperventilate so I had to give it a rest for
a while. I started flipping through the radio stations on my walkman, and
finally decided on some jazz. Which is quite a big stretch, for me. To my
amazement, I discovered I have the ability to jam along with my mouth
noises! Can you imagine? I'm not even black.

Woops, now the national anthem is playing, signifying the end of the
broadcast. The festival is over.

Gerald, needing sleep
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre