From: 75furlong@cuavax.dnet.cua.edu
Subject: Re: Dusky Beauty Tells All
Followup-To: soc.bi
Organization: The Catholic University of America
Date: Wed, 29 Jul 1992 15:03:53 GMT

In article <76728@ut-emx.uucp> keisha@ccwf.cc.utexas.edu (Coed of the Damned) writes:

>Hello, Keisha here, demuffining.
>
>I have been reading this newsgroup for about five months now, but I never
>had the guts to post anything.  Well, I have nothing to lose by posting now
>because everyone that I care about knows about my preferences, so here goes.

Many joyous welcomes!!!!!
<hug><hug><hug><smother (:>

be warned - the welcome wagon can be pretty rambunctious at times...
<grin>

[lots of eminently savable stuff deleted for space]

>When I got to college, I still mostly concentrated on men.  I guess it
>was me trying to live up to a feminine ideal.  But those dreams, those
        ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
>fantasies about being with women never went away.  Ever.

I can truly relate to this feeling. Throughout high school and much of college,
I had strong feelings toward womyn, but was very male-oriented in practice. I
knew lots of gay men, but no lesbians or bis whatsoever. It wasn't until 
three of my closest friends came out (2 as lesbians, one as bi)
and I took an *extremely* formative philosophy class on theories of oppression
and liberation, that I felt I had a community to attach myself to.

[more good stuff deleted]
 
><sigh>  Sometimes I feel like I'm the only bisexual woman in the world.
>Well, at least the only one that I know of.  I know plenty of gay men and
>lesbians, and oodles of straights, but I cannot think of one human being
>that I know or have been introduced to who can talk to me about what I'm
>feeling and have some real life experience.  In a way, it makes me feel
>very alone here.

I have a feeling that many people can sympathize with this. I don't know Texas
terribly well, but most of the folks I've met from there are quite
conservative. But fear not - we are lurking everywhere! <impish grin> There may
very well be someone on your machine who read your post and breathed a heavy
sigh of relief to know that there was someone else...

>I've also been reading about how lesbians sometimes disparage the lifestyles
>of bisexual women.  (Something about their sexual intimacy with men making
>it hard for the two groups to understand each other.  Is that right?  The
>whole discussion has me very, very confused.  Can someone explain further?)
>I can feel the desire to be with both men and women, but I would be hard 
>pressed to make a lifestyle choice that would ostracise me from a sizeable
>and vocal group of women who work to make the lives of all women better.

From my experience, this is not the majority by any means, but perhaps I have 
been fortunate. There will be separatists in every movement, and they tend to
be vocal about it. Just remember that, as someone posted earlier (I've lost the
attrib. line) "all women" includes you. There are lesbians and feminists who
are working to improve women's lives who *do* accept bis.

[still further stuff deleted - my this is getting long!]
 
>Comments, suggestions, hugs are welcomed.  Please be gentle. :-)

<a terribly gentle hug>
best of luck to you. By the way, where are you moving? Perhaps you will end up
in the midst of a bevy of bis..... 

>Keisha J. Gray -- Co-ed of the Damned

Love the sig!
many blessings!
-alison