HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: jennyg@titan.ucc.umass.edu (Jenny Gutbezahl)
Subject: Re: Jenny Shows Her Bad Manners
Organization: University of Massachusetts, Amherst
Date: Fri, 20 Nov 1992 20:28:59 GMT

In article <1992Nov20.175737.29662@wetware.com> drieux@wetware.com (drieux, just drieux) writes:
>
>Just Because Friar Franklin has NOT passed
>your TestosteroneTuringTest does NOT mean
>that he is a DickLessWimp!
>

drieux, honey, when I said that Stevie had not passed my
TestosteroneTuringTest, I did not mean to imply that
he was *necessarily* a DickLessWimp, but merely that
the possibility existed, and that by instructing
me to be nice to Stevie simply because he is
a man, is making assumptions.  It doesn't mean that 
these assumptions are false, merely that we have
no reason for believing them to be true.

We've all seen Banta's ManTool (well, actually, I
haven't because I haven't a gif viewer, but I'm
a blind trusting fool & don't think that everyone
talks about this gif merely to mislead me), we've
all felt the manliness of Iowa Dan's posts.

But never has there been anything posted to this
group that would indicate that Stevie has a 
y-chromosome.

>Good Girls Learn to Be NICE to Men, 
>because Men are Male!
>

Oh, well then I guess this argument doesn't
apply to me anyway.  So I'm off the hook.

Jenny "ProblemOlderWomanInTraining" Gutbezahl
-- 
***************************************************************************
jennyg@titan.ucc.umass.edu is Jenny Gutbezahl @ Univ. of Mass, Amherst
****************************************************************************
These opinions are all mine.  Flame all you want, I'll make more
From: dmunroe@vcd.hp.com (Dave Munroe)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Trials of Life video
Date: 18 Nov 92 22:22:13 GMT
Organization: Oulette-Paquard

Has anyone seen this video?  I've only seen the commercials for it (far
too often).

At last we see animals for what they really are: nasty little bastards
that would rip your throat out if they thought they could get away with
it and were given half a chance.

-Dave
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Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: parr@acs.ucalgary.ca (Charles Parr)
Subject: feminists in bondage
Date: Wed, 18 Nov 92 20:36:17 GMT
Organization: The University of Calgary, Alberta

Well, I'm peeved.

I've been turning over a certain ethical question in my mind,
think I've come to a conclusion, and if I'm right it constitutes
a peeve of enormous proportions.

A while ago two smug female undergraduates raised up an enormous
fuss about a poster being circulated on campus. The poster, which
advertised a cabaret/dance, featured an extremely busty woman.

Not a photo, mind, but a caricature drawing of a woman in a
bikini.

The usual feminist/antifeminist diatribes were spouted, and
the standard free speech/hatred of women stuff was trotted out
and aired.

Both sides got to have their little moment in the sun.

Now I know where I stand on the subject: Depictions of seminaked
nubile females are a Good Thing, and people who don't like to
admit to this are either (a) Silly or (b) Out to feather their
own nests at the expense of someone elses pleasures.

But what peeves me, what really gets up my nose about it, what
really makes me genuinely angry, is the obvious corollary to
their censoring attitude: 

"You, being a man, are obviously a pig. Your motives are automatically
those of a rapist murderer, and therefore you are not allowed to have
an opinion which dissents from ours. We are the sole arbiters of what
is acceptable, so if we don't like it, that's the end of the discussion.
Knuckle under, or you are simply a sexist male with all the morals
of a diseased slime mold."

Feh.

Regards, Charles
-- 
Within the span of the last few weeks I have heard elements of
separate threads which, in that they have been conjoined in time,
struck together to form a new chord within my hollow and echoing
gourd. --Unknown net.person
From: library@comlab.ox.ac.uk (Gordon Riddell)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Campus bar peeve
Date: 16 Nov 92 16:00:28 GMT
Organization: Oxford University Computing Laboratory, UK
Originator: library@merlin.comlab

In article <28203@castle.ed.ac.uk> fofp@castle.ed.ac.uk (M Holmes) writes:
>The guvmint, despite spectacular failure in bucking markets a mere two
>months ago, has yet to acquire a clue.
>
>Maybe I'll even buy Jeremy's flat if he's still trying to sell it :-)
>
>Of course, I'll underbid. It's mandatory in today's market after all ;-)
>

I realise you'll know this Mike (having ploughed through lengthy posts
on mortgages during the summer, some of which were from you) but
watch out or he might just accept your offer. In Scotland that's it.

Here in England's green and pleasant housing market you're best to wait
until change of contract day, withdrawn your too generous offer, tell
them you are a completely callous bastard, and offer them 5k less.
We don't shilly-shally around with this "an offer is final" crap.
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: nolan@twg.com (Nolan Hinshaw)
Subject: Re: The University of California at Berkeley
Reply-To: nolan@twg.com
Organization: League for Civil Undress
Date: Mon, 16 Nov 1992 18:21:03 GMT


In article <1e4ep7INNrpl@darkstar.UCSC.EDU>, carolo@cse.ucsc.edu 
(Carol Osterbrock) sounds the clarion call for individual freedom:

!Peeve: The Naked Guy at UCB. Neighbors think he's crazy, but he seems only to
have taken the constitution's protections to heart and to have started living
by his principles.

--
Nolan "...but I'll defend his right..." Hinshaw
Internet: nolan@twg.com			Dingalingnet: (415)962-7197
From: thf2@ellis.uchicago.edu (Ted Frank)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: The University of California at Berkeley
Date: 17 Nov 92 16:38:20 GMT
Reply-To: thf2@midway.uchicago.edu
Organization: University of Chicago Computing Organizations

In article <28287@castle.ed.ac.uk> jeremy@castle.ed.ac.uk (Jeremy Henderson) writes:
>In article <1992Nov16.182103.15403@twg.com>, nolan@twg.com (Nolan Hinshaw) writes:
>
>> !Peeve: The Naked Guy at UCB. Neighbors think he's crazy, but he seems only to
>> have taken the constitution's protections to heart and to have started living
>> by his principles.
>         ^^^^^^^^^^
>I don't think you spell it like that, Nolan.

Perhaps you should look it up, because he's right.  (It's possible that
some third-rate has-been economic powers might spell it differently.)

>BTW, I gather that one of the Dalhousie Dimbulbs has been whining at my
>expense. An unusual sensation. Not so much like being savaged by a sheep,
>more like being gummed by a goldfish.

[Insert your own oral sex joke here.  I'm too principled to make
fun of someone who's picking on Dalhousie.]

ObPeeve: There's a bozo who's doing some sort of research project on the
         net, so he's automailing everyone who's ever posted to
         alt.politics.*.  Except that he's not bright enough to filter
         out people who post more than once, and I already have four
         messages from the idiot, and no doubt will return to my
         computer this evening with twelve more.
-- 
ted frank                     | thf2@ellis.uchicago.edu 
standard disclaimers          | void where prohibited
the university of chicago law school, chicago, illinois 60637
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: thf2@ellis.uchicago.edu (Ted Frank)
Subject: Re: Debugging the group
Reply-To: thf2@midway.uchicago.edu
Organization: University of Chicago Computing Organizations
Date: Wed, 18 Nov 1992 04:22:06 GMT

In article <1992Nov17.185239.27473@twg.com> nolan@twg.com writes:
>
>OK, folks, that's all I can stand; I can't stand no more. The Curse from
>Dalhousie still believes there's merit in his contributions to the net, and in
>particular to this happy group of terminally nice people. I call for a vote!
>Follow up to this article with your opinion (one line, please, in the holy
>name of bandwidth) of his "contributions." If the vote favors him, so be it.If
>not, then I have a proposal for a solution.

Peeve: That this posting apparentally generated a dozen mail-messages in
       my mailbox for some reason.

Peeve: When a woman-friend leaves a message on my answering machine to call
       her back immediately, and I check my messages to get this message,
       and I can't remember her number because my brain is still clogged
       with other useless bits of trivia such as the phone number of Pamela 
       Proler, who I haven't seen in eleven years, so I make the foolish
       decision to run home in the middle of a productive night writing
       my comment, get home to discover that the library doesn't believe
       they've collected the $9.50 fine and has instead incurred a late
       fee which will cost me more in time to get rid of than the cost of
       paying their blasted blackmail, search my Sprint records to find
       aforementioned phone number, only to discover she's taken her phone
       off the hook because it's the ungodly hour of 10:30 PM.  For this
       I'm staying in Chicago this Thanksgiving?

Peeve: My law review editor will probably make me take out my footnote
       citing Dave Barry. 
-- 
ted frank                     | thf2@ellis.uchicago.edu 
standard disclaimers          | void where prohibited
the university of chicago law school, chicago, illinois 60637
Newsgroups: alt.peeves,rec.motorcycles
From: kenk@sdc.com (Ken Konecki)
Subject: Re: fucking BDI motorcycle drivers
Organization: Systems Development Corporation
Date: Thu, 19 Nov 1992 15:09:28 GMT

In article <1e9bk3INN8tn@roche.csl.sri.com> mhunt@csl.sri.com (Mike Hunt) writes:
>This never fails to royally piss off a tailgater

There are few things stupider in life than to provoke an asshole into an
irrational emotional state, especially when on a motorcycle.  Do yourself
a favor and keep a mature attitude when confronted by less than mature
fellow human beings.

Cheers,
    -Ken K
-- 
Ken Konecki
e-mail:kenk@sdc.com    -or-    ...!uunet!tellab5!sdc!kenk
"Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery"
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: dmunroe@vcd.hp.com (Dave Munroe)
Subject: Re: JENNY'S LESSON IN FLAMING
Date: Sat, 21 Nov 1992 03:16:15 GMT
Organization: Oulette-Paquard
Keywords: rapist pig-dog

larry@peak.psl.nmsu.edu (Evil Engineer doin' it the Cowboy Way) writes:

>  -+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-
> 	 "I am NOT a homosexual necrophiliac," said Tom, in dead earnest.
>  -+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-
>
> 	 "I am NOT a homosexual necrophiliac," said Tom, in dead Ernest.
>                                                                 ^^^^^^
>Sorry to be a pain the ass, Geoff, but some spelling errors just can't be
>ignored.  :->

Also sorry to be a pain in the ass, but the Geoffster's got it right.  If he'd
written "Ernest" he'd've given away the joke immediately.  With this type of
wordplay (a Tom Swifty?), the phrase is written normally.

-Dave
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Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: esp51@cas.org ()
Subject: Little Stevey Franklin has his finger stuck on the F key
Organization: Chemical Abstracts Service, Columbus, Ohio
Date: Tue, 17 Nov 1992 03:42:17 GMT

Steve Franklin) writes:
Scott Park writes:

>>  I'll tell you what Steve, if you're ever in town bring your clubs and
>>about 10,000 cash.
>
>   What the hell? are you stupid? I go on about how much I hate golf, and
>then you expect me to bet 3 years of tuition towards your little ego? heh,
>you're most priceless mate... In any case, I staunchly refuse your bet, on

In other words, Stevey, you're a PUSSY.  Save your ranting for subjects
you know something about, like whacking off.  Or, better yet, just go
the freak back to whatever frozen swamp you crawled out of.

>Well, my fine feathered friend, I have played most sports, and played them
>well. Dabbled in rugby, excelled at sailing, 9 years of hockey, soccer,
>competitive swimming,

If you're such an accomplished athelete, then why fer keyricesake don't you
write about these sports you have experienced instead of babbling superficial
tripe on matters with which you are stupendously ignorant.
(Please don't misunderstand me, I would much prefer if you wouldn't
write at all.)

>Peeve2: Golf Carts. Doesn't a sport require one to burn calories? Oh, maybe

Come on Stevey, ask your mommy to front you the 10 grand and drive on
down, we'll fill a cart with a case of iced beer, and I'll save you
the misery of misspending 3 more years in college.

Scott Park
From: smith@ug.cs.dal.ca (Sean Smith)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Halfwits.
Date: 17 Nov 92 22:41:27 GMT
Organization: Math, Stats & CS, Dalhousie University, Halifax, NS, Canada

In article <qXXcuB1w165w@wabworld.atl.ga.us> bill@wabworld.atl.ga.us (Angus MacPeevy) writes:
>smith@ug.cs.dal.ca (Sean Smith) writes:
>
>> 	That was below the belt.
>
>
>I doubt if Sean has anything below the belt anyway, in which case dre 
>scored a 'miss.'  Sorry, dre.

	Um... legs?  Feet?  Ankles?  Knees?  ;)

	Sean
-- 
Sean Smith - Dalhousie University  "I'm not paid to think - that's management." 
Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada                    Don Cherry for Prime Minister in
01SSMITH@AC.DAL.CA or smith@ug.cs.dal.ca	'93 in Canada!
Disclaimer:  These ideas are mine...ALL MINE!!  'Cause noone else'd want 'em.
From: yarvin@cs.yale.edu (Norman Yarvin)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Veteran's Day
Date: 15 Nov 1992 19:52:50 -0500
Organization: Yale Computer Science Department
NNTP-Posting-Host: cathy.na.cs.yale.edu

dennis@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu (Thomas A. Dennis) writes:
>As much as it pains me to say this, the dictionary bears out your description 
>of "valor" as accurate.  I guess, when I included the Thing from 
>Kennebunkport in my list, I was thinking of his record as 
>commander-in-chief, specifically his practice of expressing his irritation 
>at former buddies who happen to be dictators by wiping out large numbers of 
>their civilian subjects and underarmed grunts.

No, no, no.  Bush is NOT a lawyer.  The interactions of the US with other
nations are not to be understood in terms third-rate lawyers feel
comfortable with, such as "expressing irritation at former buddies".

Yours in appreciation for a man who at least understood the relative values
of blood and oil,

--
Norman Yarvin						yarvin@cs.yale.edu
 "Zigzag, v.t. To move forward uncertainly, from side to side, as one
  carrying the white man's burden." -- _The Devil's Dictionary_
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: dmunroe@vcd.hp.com (Dave Munroe)
Subject: Re: Evil toy peeve
Date: Mon, 23 Nov 1992 19:14:40 GMT
Distribution: alt.peeves
Organization: Hewlett-Packard

In article <LARRY.92Nov21180122@peak.psl.nmsu.edu> larry@peak.psl.nmsu.edu (Evil Engineer doin' it the Cowboy Way) writes:

>I found that this infernal sound is emitting from the toy shop directly
>across from Dalton's, the source is one of those crummy Hong Kong toy
>trains running on four feet of circular track.

YES!  We have *exactly* the same placement of toy store and Dalton's at the
mall here.  Same damn train.  I was in the middle of the bookstore and the
noise was driving me nuts, even though you'd think a half-dozen aisles of
books and people would act as a sound baffle.  I did stomp over to the toy
store and turn the thing off.

Peeve: the bookstore is full of howling kids wanting to get their parents
to take them across to the toy store.

-Dave
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Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: thf2@ellis.uchicago.edu (Ted Frank)
Subject: Re: Teddy has Brain Damage (was Re: Mikey has Dain Bramage)
Reply-To: thf2@midway.uchicago.edu
Organization: University of Chicago Computing Organizations
Date: Thu, 19 Nov 1992 04:34:37 GMT

In article <Nov.18.22.38.09.1992.24078@math.rutgers.edu> jdare@math.rutgers.edu (James Ananda Dare @ Undue Purversity) writes:
>In article <1992Nov17.194047.4386@midway.uchicago.edu> thf2@ellis.uchicago.edu
>(Ted Frank) writes:
>
>> That was the dullest flame I've ever seen.
>Ditto.  (Ted's flame, that is.)

Is not!

Peeve: all these free riders who simply recycle my posts to say "no I'm
       not, you are!"  Come up with your own line already.  Or go back to
       stalking co-eds at Rutgers.  At the very least use "I'm rubber and
       you're glue" -- that's third-grade level, which is two years ahead
       of the Rush Limbaughisms you're presenting.

>Yeah, but it's your bullshit we're reading.  I've read a number of
>you're flames on Mikey and I can't see where yours are any more
>interesting or entertaining that his.  

Parse this for me, and get back to me.  

Note also, the qualitative difference between flames.  Mikey flames my
sex life.  Mikey knows about as much about my sex life as he does about
stringing together a sentence in either Urdu or Swahili -- none, which makes
him illiterate in at least three languages, including English.  Thus,
his flames are generic, and could be applied to anyone with equal 
[in]validity.

On the other hand, Mikey's Content Lite posts provide fertile ground for 
flaming.  And my flames of him have been based on close to 100% on things
that Mikey himself has posted.  If Mikey didn't try to make brazenly false
claims, or make such a point of demonstrating his Dalhousie-patented
ignorance, or try to work his way up to gnat-hood by posting an obnoxious
response to every thing of mine he reads in every newsgroup he sees me post
to, he'd be less flame-able.

>As a matter of fact, your
>flames are worse that Steve Franklin's (IMHO).  

Now you're trying to free-ride off of everyone's flames of Steve Franklin.

Oh yeah?  Well you're worse than me!  Ha! Ha!  And if I'm worse than
Steve Franklin, and you're worse than me, than you're worse than Steve
Franklin, too!  

Here's a response for you, Dare, just to get you started: "No, I'm not."

>> standard disclaimers          | void where prohibited
>                                  ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
>                                  alt.peeves perhaps?

Learn what void means.  The noun refers to the space between your ears.
This isn't the noun.

ObPeeve: That Dare couldn't even come up with an original thread title.
         He does injustice to his name.

ObPeeve: Someone won't get the joke and flame this post, too.
-- 
ted frank                     | thf2@ellis.uchicago.edu 
standard disclaimers          | void where prohibited
the university of chicago law school, chicago, illinois 60637
From: jeremy@castle.ed.ac.uk (Jeremy Henderson)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Education and Spelling Flames ( Re: The U of C at Berkeley
Date: 19 Nov 92 10:48:08 GMT
Organization: Edinburgh University

In article <17955@autodesk.COM> booter@Autodesk.COM (Elaine Richards) writes:
~In article <28287@castle.ed.ac.uk> jeremy@castle.ed.ac.uk (Jeremy Henderson) writes:
~>In article <1992Nov16.182103.15403@twg.com>, nolan@twg.com (Nolan Hinshaw) writes:
~>> by his principles.
~>         ^^^^^^^^^^
~>I don't think you spell it like that, Nolan.
~
~Um, it is spelled that way. One does not live by one's principals, unless
~one lives next door to the head administator at her school.

As I already explained to Mike Holmes, you're missing the point. Maybe it
wasn't a real rib-tickler of a jest, but I'd rather be thought un-funny
than illiterate.

~Peeve: Spelling flames.

Who's flamin' who?

~Peeve: Education in the UK. You lads need some good, nasty nuns to rap
~your knuckles.

Oooh, yes please.

ObParentalBit: AntiPeeve: Looking forward to sending Li'l Emmy to a school
where they have a school uniform, so I can lust after her friends.




-- 
===Jeremy Henderson===jeremy@castle.ed.ac.uk=          

"I have to scan these posts in case Jeremy includes some line
out of context in his .sig" - FriendOfFernandoKhomeini.
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: rks@cscns.com (Island's Child)
Subject: Re: How 'bout a CatFight
Organization: Community_News_Service
X-Newsreader: Tin 1.1 PL3
Date: Sat, 21 Nov 1992 02:49:42 GMT

donp@twg.com (Don Pette) writes:
: In article <HUF-r*Mp0@prolix.apana.org.au> dac@prolix.apana.org.au (Andrew Clayton) Got me to thinking:
: 
: >The average housecat can do two or more things simultaneously. This
: >sort of ability isn't something to gloat about.
: >
: 
: Hmm. The more I thought about this, the harder it was to come up 
: with _any_ two things a cat can do simultaneously. Have you ever
: seen a cat shit and lick their paws at the same time...no. Have
: you ever seen a cat chase his prey while eating a meal...no. And that's
: all cat's really do, eat and shit. And they don't do that at the
: same time either. So Dac, let's have some examples to prove your point.
: Breathing and walking simultaneously doesn't count.
: 
: 
: -Don 'the cross Nolan must bear' 

      Are you the same Don Pette who used to work at HP in Santa Clara
in the mid-eighties?

      Someone knows you in Colorado.
From: donb@igor.tamri.com (Don Baldwin)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Recent Peeve
Date: 17 Nov 92 18:15:14 GMT
Organization: TOSHIBA America MRI, South San Francisco, CA

In article <92321.164841LXP111@psuvm.psu.edu> <LXP111@psuvm.psu.edu> writes:
>Hey Curtis, by your definition of a "wankhole" and your last post to me, all I
>have to say is whadda be up fellow wanker:)You could have saved up all that 
>space by just saying something like "hey dude, no offense", "I'm sorry buttwad
>" or anything similiar would have been cool.  But thanks for the explano.  Oh
>yeah, to answer your ?'s..I'm a sophomore majoring in Microbiology, but my
roommate is in computer geek err science :)

How about "Shut up and go back to reading alt.idiocy, buttwad"?

>Since you didn't mean to offend, then I take back my previous posts (I thought
>they were pretty funny though), but I sure did piss off the homo's..go figure.

Jokes about redecorating Peevetown aside, we aren't really out to piss off
the "homos" here.  So if you're into that sort of thing, you might want to
remember Banta's on-target comment that enlightenment is doled out with
2x4s in this newsgroup...

    don
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Newsgroups: alt.peeves