From: SILVERI@QUCDN.QueensU.CA (Silver Tiger)
Subject: Re: Set the WayBack Machine (Coming Out)
Organization: Queens University at Kingston
Date: Mon, 11 Jan 1993 23:25:52 GMT

In article <C0ozDE.FCo@world.std.com>
smoir@world.std.com (Scott A Moir) writes:
 
>[Personal poke in the ribs]
 
*Ooof*  Hey!  *laugh*
 
>Gee, you never tell me anything! I'm happy for you.. Timber is a cutie.
 
That he is.  *smile*
 
>I hope things go well for all of you.
 
I hope so too Scott.  I hadn't made this public knowledge for a while,
as I wanted to make reasonably sure things were working well first.
 
[ Personal poke back:  I've got your new email address written down and
will be contacting you shortly. :)  BTW, you had page #mail from me on
FurryMUCK that was over 60 days old... *cough cough* ]
 
[ Getting those Bi-Pride pins ]
 
>Gee, and you even know someone in the Boston area who can get you one... }:>
 
Now that you mention it... I'll email you on this one.  I'm going to
want at least two, one for El, and one for Timber.  Seems my being out
has become a bit infectious.  *grin*
 
[ How to treat a Mom when coming out to her ]
>[Mom asks THE BIG QUESTION]
 
>I also found this to be true. I am out to my parents, and I told them up
>front. In later conversations, I found that they felt that this helped as
>well. Now, your mileage may vary, parents are all different. Mine have
>dealt well so far, although they have not yet been presented with the
>image of me walking in with a man on my arm. Soon enough though,, they
>should be meeting Lugh. I'm a bit nervous, but I expect things to go
>reasonably well.
 
Wishes of good luck go with you from this corner of the world. I hope
your parents take this reminder well.  And you've re-taken up with Lugh
eh?  }:]  Glad to hear it.
 
>What will be really telling will be your conversations with her in about a
>month or so, after she has had some time to think. Hopefully she won't
>just bury the idea and pretend it isn't there.
 
That's not like her to deny the obvious, but I'll keep a watchful eye
out for just this possibility anyway.
 
>Then it comes to issues over things like all of us holding hands and
>kissing in public, how out we are about our relationship in our local area
>(NOT the nicest of places, but we are moving soon).
 
Good, I was starting to get a tad worried about your location.  Any idea
where you're going to move to?
 
>Deanne has a child
>from a previous marriage, and the issues of organizations like the
>Massachusetts Department of Social Services (DSS) poking thier nose in
>have come up as well. (The DSS can come in and take her son, if they feel
>that he is in an unhealthy environment. They can do that to -anyone- in
>Mass.. wonderful, isn't it?)
 
Is there any state where they can't?  The CAS (Children's Aid Society)
up here can do some pretty nasty things as well.  It's amazing how much
damage these institutions are willing to do to children in the name of
'saving' them.  Admittedly, in some cases their work is beneficial, but
there are some nightmare stories as well.
 
>So it is another damn closet.. I hated the first one, and I fought so hard
>to get out and stay out that major parts of me want to rebel and be out
>and to hell with the consequences. But I can't do that... I'm affecting
>other people, people that I love dearly.
 
*sigh*  You've got a few years to go yet before the DSS can't mess with
you, given the age of Deanne's child.  Either wait, or move to some
place where the laws don't allow for overmeddlesome organizations to
take kids away from their parents, based on moral codes that aren't
strictly traditional.
 
>Don't be fooled boys & girls... Ian is indeed handsome. Biker look or not.
 
Damn, you can STILL bring a bit 'o extra colouring to my face!  Thank
you.  :)
 
>*Braided* hair? Hmm.. it must have been getting considerably longer since
>I last saw you.
 
Yup, when it is worn loose, it falls to the middle of my shoulder
blades.  It's not nearly as long as I want it...  Stasia and El have
told me that my hair looks better worn back, in either a tail, or
french braided, and I tend to agree.
 
>Congratulations on dealing with hurdle #1 with the parental unit. I hope
>all goes well. My love goes with all of you.
 
*smile*  And ours back Scott, damned good to hear from you again.
 
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