From: jecoleb@eos.ncsu.edu (have clue, will travel)
Subject: you win some, you lose some (kinda long)
Reply-To: jecoleb@eos.ncsu.edu
Organization: The Ghost Of Christmas Past Society
Date: Mon, 4 Jan 1993 18:04:47 GMT


My New Year's Eve sucked, but here's a few thoughts on a VERY surreal 
winter break:

A close female friend of mine (Lori) and I have been on the verge of breaking
through the physical barrier many times over the past seven years; usually,
it's been a case of neither one of us having another physical outlet at the
time.  This break proved without a doubt to me that God/Fate/Destiny/Whatever
doesn't want that to happen, and is taking dramatic steps to prevent it. ;)

Over Thanksgiving, the tension was broken by a friend of Lori's who went out
with us one night; the friend proceeded to make a pass at BOTH Lori and myself
during the night.  While not THAT much happened, neither one of us resisted
her all that much.  An interesting diversion is about all I could chalk it up
as, along with Lori's usual gift for causing strange things to happen.

Now, with three weeks of Xmas to play with, I started out by going out with
Lori after both of us had dropped some serious hints; this time she introduced
me to ANOTHER friend of hers, this one originally from the area but going to
school in far-off Michigan.  That night Katherine and I hit it off well, we
all went to Lori's house, Katherine went home, and Lori and I cuddled for a
bit.  Things MIGHT have progressed further except for the presence of her 
(a) parents and her (b) period; as it is, the raw desire was VERY evident for
both of us.  C'est la vie.

Three days later, the three of us went out to a club on South Street in Philly,
then to a bar not too far away, in search of a guy who wanted Lori to meet
him there; I figured that Katherine and I would continue getting to know each 
other, Lori would flirt her tuckus off in my direction and sexual sparks would 
probably fly unless I found a convincing excuse to play extinguisher, even 
though Lori had hinted that Katherine was more attracted to me than I may have
thought she was.

Instead:
 *  I meet an idol of mine from the newspaper industry, whom Lori is taken
      with, flirts with all night and eventually SEDUCES.
 *  Katherine and I chat, chat and chat some more, with a delicious kiss at
      the end of the evening.
 *  Katherine and I proceed to spend the next week and a half (before she went
      back to Michigan) becoming thoroughly enchanted with each other.  I was
      in a bit of shock over a gorgeous, witty, intelligent friend being 
      romantically interested in ME, but I certainly wasn't going to fight it,
      as I was feeling the same things, and for once not based primarily on 
      physicality (though she DID set every nerve in my body on fire, and has
      a tremendously sweet kissing/caressing style).

So, to sum up a long story; instead of moping over being shot down, I now get
to mope over the usual peculiarities of a Long Distance Relationship.  Time 
will tell how seriously she takes it as more local gents pop up, but indicators
seem to be somewhat favorable right now.

Lori's adrift in a sea of lust for the guy she met at the bar, and egging on
BOTH Katherine and I to "go with it".  I think the guy's married, but that's
an egg that's not my place to crack.

Katherine--well, I'm not ABOUT to probe into her head too much.  We talked for
hours on end about just about everything while it was still a local call; I
couldn't be more taken by her if I tried.  While her initial physical attraction
for me was of a "he looks like an ex-boyfriend" type, I'll take that facet 
wherever I can get it; she's a realist (as I am) as to limitations on an LDR,
but also made it VERY clear just how difficult the goodbye was for her to say.

Of course, there WAS a guy back in Michigan, but her attraction to him was
"purely physical, it seems" (her quote).  We clicked on ALL cylinders except
for the proximity one, which (sadly) counts for more than I care to admit.

So, for the Misunderstood College Guys out there, good news and bad news:
YES, there are attractive, personable, intelligent, witty women out there who
 	are attracted to shy, sensitive, "forlorn-looking" types.
UNFORTUNATELY, I seem to have taken yet another one out of circulation. :-P

Now all I have to do is figure out how to last a year without blowing my phone
bill/Greyhound travel budget out of proportion...

..AND how to handle the "Er, Jeff, there's something you should know..." call
I'm steeling myself for in a couple of months in a worst-case scenario.

One of these years, I'm going to learn how to handle Fate.

(Of course, my ex here in Raleigh had to one-up me by deciding to MARRY the
guy she's been sleeping with for the past two months.  So much for pathos.) :)

--
     jecoleb@eos.ncsu.edu    \\
        Luv ya, Katya!        --=--
                                  \\  have clue, will travel.
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