HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: M17257@mwvm.mitre.org
Subject: Re: Help with Spanking Alternatives
Organization: The MITRE Corporation, McLean VA 22102
Date: Wed, 6 Jan 1993 17:36:17 GMT

In article <1993Jan4.045240.11706@news2.cis.umn.edu>
sapphire@wings.micro.umn.edu (Theresa Jarosz Alberti) writes:
>
>I'm really interested in alternatives to spanking when dealing with
>children too young to understand reasoning.  My son and daughter are 17
>months old and they are starting to get into behaviors I'm not sure how
>to handle.
>
>Another problem has been feeding time.  They've gotten into very
>purposefully throwing their food on the floor.  We say "no!" loud, louder
>and even louder, and they smile cunningly and drop the food slowly onto
>the floor.  We've gotten into spaking their hands for this and
>threatening to take them out of their high chairs.  Sometimes they even
>smile after being slapped!
>
>sure what else to do.  I can see when they're a little older I can use
>"time-outs" and simple cause-and-effect, but what to do with 17 month
>olds?
>
>Theresa Jarosz Alberti       sapphire@wings.micro.umn.edu
 
Well, it really depends on the child, and their personal development, but
it sounds like your child is about the same as mine, or close.
 
We have been using time outs for Stefan since about 17 months(he's now19)
and they work rather nicely.  He doesn't like being by himself, even in a
roomful of toys.  And when asked if he wants time out, he always says no.
(though I'm sure THAT will change)
 
I know you aren't supposed to use their bedrooms for timeout, but we have
a small house and that room is the furthest from the action. We do not
force him to sit still...yet.  But we haven't needed to either.  After a
little while (3-5 minutes max) goes by either we go and ask him if he's sorry
he disobeyed, or he calls out "Momma!" then we go ask, and if he says yes
and hugs us(which he loves to do) then we go back to playing, if not we
say no, you're not ready to play, you still need more timeout. (only had to
use this one once-before we even finished the sentence he was hugging to
say he was sorry)
 
Sometimes timeouts still do not work, and when in malls or restaurants we
usually take him aside and try talking firmly to him.  If that doesn't work,
which it usually doesn't , then he gets spanked.  He is infamous for crying
as loudly as possible whenever he's spanked or really scolded, no matter
how softly you spank.  We know this is because of the grandparents'
weaknesses for hearing their only grandchild cry-can't stand it, go all mushy.
 
We have found that around 18 months we could also use the "take away the toy"
when he doesn't play nicely. (i.e., throws toy at mom, draws crayon on rug, etc
)
I hope this helps, I didn't think timeouts would work yet for him either,
but Stefan is a very sociable child and truly dislikes being alone.
 
Ellie Blackwell 703-883-7079
From: clare@nynexst.com (Clare Chu)
Subject: Re: Getting rid of pacifier
Organization: Nynex Science and Technology
Distribution: na
Date: Wed, 6 Jan 93 14:12:37 GMT

In article <1993Jan5.192050.11819@adobe.com> riggle@adobe.com (Kathleen Riggle) writes:
>
>That's a good idea.  What worked for us completely surprised me.  When
>we moved Rachel to a toddler bed, she stopped taking bottles.  The
>first night she refused the bottle, she had one before nap the next
>day, refused it for nighttime again.  It looked like a golden
>opportunity, so we stopped at naptime the next day also.  After a week
>or so, she asked for a bottle, but Dave said that we don't do bottles
>anymore.  She was fine with it.  I can't believe it was that easy!
>

  I've noticed that things are really easy when they're ready for it.
  For example, putting Tony to bed is almost too easy.  Yeah, yeah, just
  wait until the new baby shows up.  But these days, we just announce
  that it's 8:00, time for diaper change and pajamas, get his Kermit doll,
  and ask him if he wants milk.  Then pick him up, plop him in the crib,
  turn off the light and say, Good Night.

  Right now I'm not trying to wean pacifier or bottle since "you-know-who"
  wants to keep him on it.  She still wants to feed him the bottle in a
  "baby-position".  But you just wait.  One day, he'll say no.  At home,
  we just give him a cup of milk, or juice when he asks for it, but he
  still gets his bottle over there.  My mom said that her mother tried
  to feed her the bottle after she was two and she finally refused.  So
  it seems that they'll give it up themselves.  The difference is that
  the baby is not interested in walking around with the bottle.  I think
  it's harder when they have a habit of walking around with it.  However
  if it's the adult caretaker who wants to hold the toddler and feed them
  the bottle, eventually the toddler will say "no".  He wants to do everything
  himself anyway.  For nighttime, I give him a cup but I hold it, since
  he's sleepy, and then tell him to go back to sleep.  He rarely asks for
  milk at night unless they turned the heater up so high that he sweats.
  (We can't control the heat in our apartment.)

  The pacifiers (notice plural) he carries around as good luck charms, but
  he doesn't "use" them except to sleep.  We probably have enough of them
  to decorate a small Christmas tree with.  He likes to keep count of them
  and tuck them away in safe places, like the trunk of his car, or the
  pocket of his diaper bag.  He also has names for them, like baby pacifier
  (for the newborn size), dirty pacifier (for the moldy from the inside
  one he never uses), new pacifier (for all the others).
Xref: sparky misc.kids:31626 alt.pagan:14992
Newsgroups: misc.kids,alt.pagan
From: shobart@dvlseq.us.oracle.com (Sarah Groves Hobart)
Subject: Re: First birthday party ideas?
Organization: Oracle World HQ, Redwood Shores, California
Date: Wed, 6 Jan 1993 01:46:24 GMT
X-Disclaimer: This message was written by an unauthenticated user
              at Oracle Corporation.  The opinions expressed are those
              of the user and not necessarily those of Oracle.

>>First of all, how did he get a godfather without a formal 
>>christening?
>
>I'm confused.  Why would atheist, agnostic, or religously
>indifferent folks want their child to have godparents of
>any variety?  What function would that person fill in their
>child's life?

In addition to the questions above, I've gotten questions via e-mail about
how or why Christopher has a godfather without intervention of formal 
religion.  

I believe that there is a lot more to life than a human machine, or nature,
or coincidence.  I also feel that any religion I have run into is only one
way of looking at something that may be indescribable in human terms.  Thus
I feel that organized religion tends to be a narrowing vision on something
that is enormous and awesome.  In other words, I believe that the religions
I have run into are only looking at a piece.  That's not bad, but it can be
restricting and lead to prejudice against other religions that may be 
looking at another piece.  I also believe that any person's relationship with
the spiritual side (for lack of a better term) is very personal.

Christopher's godfather is someone who has been intimately involved in my
husband's and my life, and I believe he (the godfather) is someone who can
open Christopher's eyes to many different aspects of life, be an 
understanding and positive adult influence, and be someone who can give a 
different point of view on the world (different from my husband's or mine).
If my husband and I were to die, I hope that his godfather will continue
with Christopher's spiritual upbringing by demonstrating and discussing that
people are different, and there are many approaches to growing up to be a 
whole and human person.

So we're not asking his godfather to look out for his upbringing in a 
particular religion; we're asking him to work with us to look out for
Christopher's spiritual and human upbringing.  The "god" in godfather 
doesn't symbolize a particular religion to us; it indicates that this
person is responsible for spiritual rather than material needs.  The
"father" part of godfather indicates that this person is acting like
a parent in some ways in the upbringing of the child.

Note from my husband (he just called me on the phone):
	
	I wanted to select a friend whom we respect, but who lives a 
	life quite different from ours.  I was looking for a non-relative
	to be closely involved in the parenting process.  Someone living
	a significantly different life, which Christopher could observe,
	yet who carried that parental aura.


So it makes complete sense to us that Christopher has a godfather, even
though we're not very involved in organized religion.  

Sarah Groves Hobart
shobart@oracle.com
From: M18611@MBVM.Mitre.Org (Kathy Wilk)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: New Sleep Question: Please Help
Date: 12 Jan 93 19:43:39 GMT
Organization: The MITRE Corporation, Bedford MA 01730

In article <1993Jan12.175556.2228@nynexst.com>
clare@nynexst.com (Clare Chu) writes:
>>>     ...
>>  I had a similar problem but my child didn't want to sleep in his bed.
>>  I have a 25-month-old son who has never liked sleeping in his bed, and
>>I never minded it that he wanted to sleep with my husband and me.  However,
>>my husband minded!
>
>  Actually my son minds very much.  We had this habit of letting him
>  fall asleep in our bed and then transferring him to his crib. (I know
>  it's not what Ferber suggests, but we didn't have a problem).  Then
>  we noticed that it took him longer to fall asleep in our bed because
>  he wanted to talk, to play with his stuffed animals, and would alternate
>  between giving me a hug, giving my husband a hug, etc.  Finally we
>  asked him if he wanted to go to the crib, and he sat up and held up
>  his hands, indicating yes.  And he immediately settles in comfortably
>  in his crib and falls asleep.  So maybe if you let him sleep in your
>  bed, but disturb him (not that we intentionally did) so that he
>  can't fall asleep, he'll want to be in his crib instead.
>
   My little guy does not want to play or talk to us.  He just wants to
drink a bottle and then go to sleep.  If he only drinks half the bottle and
is tired enough to go to sleep, he hands the bottle to me ('Here, Mama') and
then turns over and conks out.  It has happened, however, that he couldn't
go to sleep because he was tired and my husband and I were both reading the
Sunday paper in bed and the rustling of the newpaper bothered him.  He tossed
and turned drowsily and then was grateful to be put in his bed when I carried
him to his bed and tucked him in.
   Normally, if he fusses, I ask him if he wants me to put him in his bed.  He
says, 'NO!' and eventually quiets down.  He is very adamant about how he wants
to go to sleep ('I want my BOTTLE!')
   His bed is comfortable but he likes ours.  He even likes to nap there.
 
 
                        K. Wilk
                        M18611@MBVM.MITRE.ORG
 
            <--********************************-->
 'Thrusting my nose firmly between his teeth, I threw him to the ground
  on top of me.' - Mark Twain
            <--********************************-->
From: mcc@ucrmath.ucr.edu (mei-chu chang)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: When to wean after one year
Date: 8 Jan 93 19:24:40 GMT
Organization: University of California, Riverside

i have a question about nursing before going to bed
what about the teeth(cavity)? don't the babies usually 
have their last sip of milk in the mouths?
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: guido@island.COM (Guido Marx)
Subject: Re: Breast Infections
Organization: Island Graphics Corp.  San Rafael, Ca.
Date: Tue, 5 Jan 1993 21:44:02 GMT

In article <1993Jan4.154253.7599@kodak.kodak.com> salvaggi@sunshine.Kodak.COM (Nanette Salvaggio) writes:
>
>My sister has developed a breast infection,  it started on Christmas day, and is 
>not improving.  She has seen her doctor 4 times in the last week.  They 
>keep changing the antibiotic to a stronger one.  My niece will still nurse,
>but my sister just about has to bite on a bullet the whole time.  The pain
>is pretty intense.  They are concerned that she may develope an absess.
>Does anyone have any experience with this,  I never had one while I was
>nursing.  Any info would be helpful.  Thanks
>Nanette

Well, being a man I haven't had any personal experience with this.
My wife was fortunate and didn't have any while she was nursing
our son.  However, my mother had a couple while she was nursing
my younger siblings.  She would continue to nurse - this is important,
and she would also put hot compresses on the affected areas of the
breast.  Doing this she was able to clear up the infections quite
rapidly.  

Guido
From: ephraim@think.com (Ephraim Vishniac)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: airport waiting area
Date: 5 Jan 1993 14:12:06 GMT
Organization: Thinking Machines Corporation, Cambridge MA, USA
NNTP-Posting-Host: turing.think.com

In article <1755@optigfx.optigfx.com> wang@optigfx.optigfx.com (Alice Wang) writes:
>During the holidays, we were at the airport to pickup
>my mother.  The plane, as usual, was delayed and we were
>glad to found out that one section of the waiting area
>was intented for kids.  There was a Little-Tikes Slide,
>a FP Picnic Table and a Duplo table with plenty of blocks.
>It was certainly enough to keep Christine entertained for
>the 45 minutes or so we had to wait.

>I haven't been to the San Diego airport for a year now
>so I don't know how new is this facility.  I wonder how
>common is this in other airports?

Logan Airport (Boston) has a play area for kids. There are a couple of
large climb-on toys, one of which resembles the space shuttle. A
little bit, anyway, and more if NASA would go for stronger color
schemes. There are benches for the adults, and a good view of the
field. 

The biggest problem is that the airport is huge. Unless you're waiting
in the right terminal already, this one playroom isn't going to do you
any good. 

-- 
Ephraim Vishniac    ephraim@think.com   ThinkingCorp@applelink.apple.com
 Thinking Machines Corporation / 245 First Street / Cambridge, MA 02142
        One of the flaws in the anarchic bopper society was
        the ease with which such crazed rumors could spread.
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: andy rogers <rogers@ial3.jsc.nasa.gov>
Subject: Re: Booooo, Tyco!
X-Xxdate: Mon, 11 Jan 93 14:27:46 GMT
Organization: Lockheed Engineering
X-Useragent: Nuntius v1.1.1d13
Date: Mon, 11 Jan 1993 14:28:42 GMT

In article <x5_3ss_@rpi.edu> Chris Nelson, nelsonc@colossus.cs.rpi.edu writes:
>There was another note on this group about a Tyco race track which
>didn't work as advertised.  I think I'm getting ready to NOT buy Tyco
>toys.  Any other comments?

When i was a kid, i noticed how cheesy Tyco toys were, especially for the
cost. The only Tyco toys in my house now for my kids have been gifts from
people outside the house.

andy
----
From: linda@linda.intel.com (Linda Harbin)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: The Schoo Didn't Fit
Date: 9 Jan 93 00:52:43 GMT
Organization: Intel Corp

In article <29428@optima.cs.arizona.edu>, bweiss@cs.arizona.edu (Beth Weiss) writes:
|> nance@cbnewsd.cb.att.com (nancy.l.colucci) writes:
|> |> 
|> |> Since this story got nationwide (and probably worldwide) coverage,
|> |> does anyone have any thoughts about what defense a couple could
|> |> come up with for leaving their 9 and 4 year-old at home without
|> |> supervision while they vacationed out of the country?
|> |> 
|> |> It is getting so much coverage from the media (especially right here
|> |> in the area) that every stone they upturn makes the front page.
|> 
|> I was in the Chicago area when the case was first discovered, and
|> there certainly was a lot of media coverage, perhaps even too much.
|> Parading the Schoos through O'Hare in handcuffs certainly wasn't
|> called for.
|> 
|> However, I can't think of any defense for leaving a 9 year old and
|> a 4 year old alone for more than an hour (and that would be pushing
|> it), let alone for over a week while they vacationed out of the
|> country.
|> 
|> We (my brothers and I) were latchkey kids, and I suspect my mother
|> left us alone too much and too long, but never overnight.  
|> 
|> One thing I did want to mention is that there are alternatives
|> other than relatives for staying with children when the parents
|> need to be gone.  It is possible to hire a teacher, grad student,
|> or other person to _stay_ with the child.  My mother hired a
|> theology graduate student to stay with us when she was in the
|> hospital for surgery.  Lots of people seem to think that if the
|> grandparents can't do it, then noone can, but there really are
|> other possibilities.
|> 
|> --Beth Weiss
|> bweiss@cs.arizona.edu

Right after the story broke, I heard that the Grandmother had told police that
she offered to watch the two girls but the parents told her they had already
made other arrangements.  Any one else hear this?  

***************************************************
	Linda Harbin       Hillsboro, Oregon 
	503-696-2261       linda@littlei.intel.com
***************************************************
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: goldberg@eldyn.gsfc.nasa.gov (Patti Twigg)
Subject: Re: The Schoo didn't fit
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.4-b1  
Organization: NASA Goddard Space Flight Center - Greenbelt, MD, USA
Date: Mon, 11 Jan 1993 18:34:00 GMT

In article <24665@hacgate.SCG.HAC.COM>, smergen@luna.dpl.scg.hac.com (Sandra Mergen) writes...
> 
>I havn't seen anything lately in the local paper here, so if
>there is any more info on this case, please post.  I'm interested
>in what happens.
> 
I am really behind in my newspaper reading, but I do remember one
short article on this that said the 4 year old had some developmental
delays - only grunted instead of talking, for example. Did anyone
else read this?
                         Patti Twigg
From: lcheap@cac.washington.edu (Laurel Cheap )
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: looking for book
Date: 4 Jan 93 21:19:44 GMT
Organization: UW Computing
NNTP-Posting-Host: redx.cac.washington.edu

In article <1992Dec30.234659.13047@odin.corp.sgi.com>, michelle@play.esd.sgi.com (Michelle Boyd) writes:
|> In article <24607@galaxy.ucr.edu>, tadpole@ucrmath.ucr.edu (tad white) writes:
|> |> Some time ago my wife saw a children's book consisting primarily of
|> |> carefully composed photographs, each of which had a mouse in
|> |> some inconspicuous hiding place.  Unfortunately we don't know the
|> |> author or title.  If you have this book, or you think you know what
|> |> it is, I'd be most indebted if you can give me a pointer.  Thanks!
|> 
|> This is 'Goodnight Moon'.  It's a terrific book! 
. . .
I don't think 'Goodnight Moon' is the target book here.  GM isn't made up
of photographs but drawings.  It's basically a little bunny saying goodnight
to all of his bedroom objects (telephone, red balloon, mittens, kittens,
bears, chairs, etc. including "a young mouse").  It alternates between a
wide-angle view of the room on two pages and a closer view of each item
by itself (and each item is just as it appears in the bigger picture).  So
the little mouse here is in the same spot in the big pictures but on only
one other page as it's being said 'goodnight' to.

It could be that your mother did what I now do with Brendan - say "Where's
the mouse (etc) ?" each time we get to the big picture.  So you may remember
it as being a 'find the mouse' book just like I remember 101 Dalmations being
a big chase movie (it's actually only the last 5 min.) :) :).

Anyway, it's a great book.  And thank goodness since I read it every night
as part of The Bedtime Ritual with Brendan.  :)

-Laurel

"In the great green room there was a telephone, and a red balloon, and . . ."
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Laurel Cheap           University of Washington   lcheap@u.washington.edu
Information Systems    Seattle, Washington  USA   a.k.a. Brendan's mommy
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: watrous@athos.rutgers.edu (Don Watrous)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: looking for book
Date: 5 Jan 93 00:41:45 GMT
Organization: Rutgers Univ., New Brunswick, N.J.
bcc: watrous

lcheap@cac.washington.edu (Laurel Cheap ) writes:

 >michelle@play.esd.sgi.com (Michelle Boyd) writes:

 >|> tadpole@ucrmath.ucr.edu (tad white) writes:

 >|> |> Some time ago my wife saw a children's book consisting primarily of
 >|> |> carefully composed photographs, each of which had a mouse in
 >|> |> some inconspicuous hiding place.

 >|> This is 'Goodnight Moon'.  It's a terrific book! 

 >I don't think 'Goodnight Moon' is the target book here.

Try "A Mouse in the House" by Henrietta, Dorling Kinderly, Inc., New
York, 1991.

It's a nice book.  My 2.25yo daughter likes it a lot.  We have it from
the library now.

Oops, it's due today!  Gotta run!

Don
-- 
{backbone}!cs.rutgers.edu!watrous        watrous@cs.rutgers.edu
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: CREECH@LSTC2VM.stortek.com (Teresa Creech)
Subject: Re: Disposables question
Organization: StorageTek SW Engineering
Date: Mon, 11 Jan 1993 18:37:57 GMT

In article <CINDY.93Jan10151654@solan10.solan.unit.no>
cindy@solan10.solan.unit.no (Cynthia Kandolf) writes:
 
>A while back i was baby-sitting for a friend.  Until now all my
>baby-sitting experience has been with kids in cloth diapers or kids
>who are already toilet trained, so this was the first time i've spent
>a whole evening caring for someone in disposable diapers.  I just have
>one simple question, which is probably going to amuse someone, but
>which i really want to know the answer to before the next time i have
>Sunniva on my own for a while.
>
>How are you supposed to check if those water-tight, "stay dry"
>disposables have urine in them without fully undressing the poor kid?
>
>-Cindy Kandolf
> cindy@solan.unit.no
> Trondheim, Norway
>
 
If the child isn't fussy (bothered by the wet diaper), stinky (with either
#1 or #2), and the diaper isn't falling off from the weight of the urine,
leave well enough alone and don't change the baby.
Teres
From: ahelmers@umiami.ir.miami.edu
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: Childproofing (NOT!)
Date: 7 Jan 93 22:30:08 EST
Distribution: na
Organization: Univ of Miami IR

In article <glen.726360791@cs.wisc.edu>, glen@slate.cs.wisc.edu (Glen Ecklund) writes:
> 
> In case anyone is unaware of them, you can get doorknob covers which make it
> hard for a one-year-old to open most doors.  They don't impede as well if
> the doorknob is not smooth.  They don't impede adults much.  I think Toys R Us
                               ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
> has them.


Hmmm, I dunno about that.  I find that when child-free adult friends are in
my house, which has been pretty much childproofed after 4 years and 2 kids, I
have to follow THEM around to help them open doors, gates, etc.

Of course my kids figure that stuff out in about 10 minutes :).

Ann Helmers

who noticed at her neighbor's house the other day a whole piano covered with 
little framed family photos. Sigh. (her kids are 6 and 8) 
Newsgroups: misc.kids