From: megazone@obsidian.WPI.EDU (MegaZone23)
Newsgroups: alt.discordia
Subject: Principia Ordia... A rare flash od inspiration..
Date: 10 Jan 1993 10:13:00 GMT
Organization: Worcester Polytechnic Institute
NNTP-Posting-Host: obsidian.wpi.edu

							    50
							   is
							  Is
							-><-
							-Horace
							DO NOT CIRCULATE!
							Ho Chi Zen
							INTER-OFFICE WIRE SENT
							King Cong
							Real?
						      ___   ___
						      ___   ___	
						      _________
						      _________
						      _________
						     Answers:
						    *
						    CONTENTED CHAO
						   (courtesy of POEE)
						   -- Adam Weishaupt,
						  Grand Primus Illuminatus
						  Presented under the auspices
						  by the House of the Apostles
						  of ERIS.
						  of our Lady of Discord, ERIS
						 Cabal of the Unemployed
						 Monroe Cabal
						 of the lucky 25)
						"Illuminate the Opposition!"
						"This statement is false"
						(You may be one
						-Breton
						-Hassan i Sabbah
						-Rev. Dr. Grindlebone
						1. Harry Houdini
						2. Swing Music
						3. Pretzels
						4. 8 months
						5. Testy Culbert
						6. It protrudes.
						7. No vocal cords
						Bullshit makes the flowers
						Glory to We Children of ERIS
						LICK HERE!!!
						Please do not use this
						Wholly Chao
						cut off from Jeroboam him that
						document as toilet tissue
						grow & that's beautiful.
					     Dwarfs?
					     MAD MALIK
					     One night in a coffee house, a
					 Can you chart the COURSE
					- John Kenneth Galbraith
					--Che Fung (Ezra Pound, Canto 85)
					-Gen. Geo. A. Custer
					-Lichtenberg
					-MARX
					-Neils Bohr
					Export License Not Required
					Heute Die Welt
					Love,
					Morgens das Sonnensystem!
					Some never do explain.
					Some work together.
					to Captain Valentine's SWEETHEART?
				   
				   
				   
				   
				   
				   
				   
				   
				      by
				      or
				     HARK
				     NIL
				    * * *
				   *  or  *
				   KALLISTI
				   Personal
				   TELEGRAM
				   Warning!
				  HAS ARRIVED
				  ILLEGITIMO
				  being the
				  or
				 $5.00(cheap)
				 -><-
				 CARBORUNDUM
				 DIED FOR
				 HIGH PRIEST
				 I DARE YOU!
				 INTRODUCTION
				 KING
				 PO BOX 1197
				 Published By:
				 REMEMBER:
				 YOUR SINS
				"The Five Laws have root in awareness."
				*
				-><-	Mal-2
				-Genesis 1:29
				-Patamunzo Lingananda
				=ON OCCULTISM=
				Catalogs:$2.00
				DIRUIT AEDIFICAT MUTAT QUADRATA ROTUNDUS 
				FIVE TONS OF FLAX!
				Form No.: O.D.D. IIb/ii.1-37D.VVM:3134
				IMPENDING DOOM
				IT IS MY FIRM BELIEF THAT IT IS A MISTAKE
				TO HOLD FIRM BELIEFS.
				The Bureaucracy, Bureau of:  DOGMAS
				WESTERN UNION
				When I was 8 or 9 years old, I acquired
				a split beaver magazine. You can imagine
				my disappointment when,upon examination
				of the photos with a microscope, I found
				that all I could see was dots.
			       -><-  POEE  -><-
			       -><- POEE -><-
			       As a Legionnaire
			       BRUNSWICK SHRINE
			       FINAL STATEMENT
			       When I Found Her
			       ~ POPE ~
			      Bureau of The POEE Epistolary
			      HOLY NAMES
			      HOUSE OF THE RISING PODGE
			      Head Temple, San Francisco
			      SPECIAL AFTERWORD
			      THE INSIDE STORY!
			      WITH FAIRY DUST
			      invite YOU to join
			      mpython@gnu.ai.mit.edu
			     *      *
			     BAVARIAN ILLUMINATI
			     BAVARIAN ILLUMINATI
			     GOOD FOREVER
			     How I Found Goddess
			     LOOMPANICS UNLIMITED
			     PRINCIPIA DISCORDIA
			     PRINCIPIA DISCORDIA
			     San Andreas Canyon"
			     Wherein Is Explained
			    - The Numeral V sign -
			    And What I Did To Her
			    CHAPTER 5: THE PIONEERS
			    SUSPENDED ANNIHILATION
			    Sewing Circle
			    St. Trinian's
			    THE DISCORDIAN SOCIETY
			    THE POEE MYSTEREE OATH        G3400
			    ~~ OLD POEE SLOGAN ~~
			   Port Townsend, WA 98368
			   THE SACRED CHAO
			   The Erisian Affirmation
			   When I found Her
			   When in Doubt, Fuck it.
			  About Absolutely Anything
			  CONVENTIONAL CHAOS
			  HOW TO START A POEE CABAL
			  INTRODUCTION OF NEGATIVISM
			  Legion of Dynamic Discord
			  POEE PRIEST, Okinawa Cabal
			  THE BOOK OF UTERUS
			  THE HONEST BOOK OF TRUTH
			  and HIGH PRIEST of
			  of Malaclypse the Younger
			 -THE GODDESS ERIS PREVAILS-
			 = The POEE Baptismal Rite =
			 = ZARATHUD'S ENLIGHTENMENT =
			 FIRST I MUST SPRINKLE YOU
			 INTERVIEW WITH NORTON CABAL
			 KNOW YE THIS O MAN OF FAITH!
			 MALACLYPSE THE YOUNGER, KSC
			 NO TWO EQUALS ARE THE SAME!
			 Principia Discordia
			 THE PARABLE OF THE BITTER TEA
			 and How it was Revealed to
			( )Official Business  (X) Surreptitious Business
			(Werewolf Bridge, Robert Anton Wison)
			*               *
			- Hassan i Sabbah
			-----><-----
			-><-  OFFICIAL - POEE
			-John Lennon
			-Slogan of NORTON CABAL - S.F.
			Abbey of the Barbarous Relic
			G.H. Hill, San Francisco, 1979
			POEE DISORGANIZATIONAL MATRIX
			THE CURSE OF GREYFACE AND THE
			The Erisian Mysterees
			revealed to Lord Omar
			sez Thom,Gnos
		     			     name YOG-SOTHOTH?
		       				DO NOT PULL ON YELLOW TIP
		       - JOSHUA NORTON CABAL -
		       Hearing this, the man was enlightened.
		       Rev. Dr. Hypocrates Magoun, P.P.
		       THE BEARER OF THIS CARD
		       Written, in some sense, by Mal-2
		       as Divinely Revealed to
		       published by Joshua Norton Cabal
		      " On The Future Site of Beautiful
		      Application For Membership
		      MUCH ABOUT THE BAVARIAN ILLUMINATI
		      SUPPORT YOUR LOCAL POLICE
		      So please Treat Him Right
		      THE MYTH OF THE APPLE OF DISCORD
		      When not in Doubt... get in Doubt!
		      Which is Most Interesting
		      World Council of Churches Boutique
		     = THE FIVE FINGERED HAND OF ERIS =
		     Absolutely Everything Worth Knowing
		     DOGMA III - HISTORY #2, "COSMOGONY"
		     IS A GENUINE AND AUTHORIZED
		     San Francisco (K) All Rites Reversed
		     What We Know About ERIS  (not much)
		    Dedicated to The Prettiest One
		    From the Honest Book of Truth
		    from the Honest Book of Truth
		   -  THE BIRTH OF THE ERISIAN MOVEMENT -
		   A CATERPILLAR'S PRAISE TO THE BUTTERFLY
		   BEWARE! THE PARANOIDS ARE WATCHING YOU!
		   ERISIAN MAGIC RITUAL - THE TURKEY CURSE
		   GOBBLE, GOBBLE, GOBBLE, GOBBLE, GOBBLE!
		   THE ANCIENT ILLUMINATED SEERS OF BAVARIA
		   The Upstart of one hand clapping
		   being a BIBLE of The Erisian Movement
		   by Gypsie Skripto, Special Correspondent
		  =THE FIVE APOSTLES OF ERIS & WHO THEY BE =
		  Laughing Buddha Jesus [LBJ] Ranch
		  THE BATTLE HYMN OF THE ERISTOCRACY
		  WITHOUT MESSING AROUND WITH THE POLYFATHER
		  being a Beginning Introduction to
		 All Rites Reversed (K) Reprint What You Like
		 THE BOOK OF EXPLANATIONS, Chapter 1
		 THE MAGNUM OPIATE OF MALACLYPSE THE YOUNGER
		-Book of Chan compiled by O.P.U. sect
		A PRIMER FOR ERISIAN EVANGELISTS by Lord Omar
		DOGMA I - METAPHYSICS #2, "COSMOLOGY"*
		HBT; The Book of Uterus, Chap. 3
		Malaclypse the Younger/Omnibenevolent Polyfather
		Omnibenevolent Polyfather of Virginity in Gold
		POEE High Priest
		Published by POEE Head Temple - San Francisco
		THE FIVE COMMANDMENTS (THE PENTABARF)
	       (K) ALL RIGHTS REVERSED - Reprint what you like
	       A POEE MYSTEREE RITE - THE SRI SYADASTIAN CHANT
	       How I Found Goddess & What I Did To Her
	       to the Loompanics Edition of PRINCIPIA DISCORDIA
	      THIS MAY BE THE MOST IMPORTANT GUIDE IN YOUR LIFE!
	      The World's Oldest And Most Successful Conspiracy
	      The World's Oldest and Most Successful Conspiracy
	     DID YOU KNOW THAT YOU HAVE A LOPSIDED PINEAL GLAND?
	     Episkopos, THE RAYVILLE APPLE PANTHERS
	    My High Reverence MALACLYPSE THE YOUNGER, KSC
	    Omnibenevolent Polyfather of Virginity in Gold
	   In the Erisian movement of the DISCORDIA SOCIETY
	  (HBT; The Book of Advise, 1:1)
	  DISCORDIAN SOCIETY SUPER SECRET CRYPTOGRAPHIC CYPHER CODE
	  Episkopos LORD OMAR KHAYYAM RAVENHURST, KSC; Bull Goose
	  Green Beret Special Warfare School, Ft. Bragg, N.C.
	  HAIL ERIS! -><- KALLISTI -><-  ALL HAIL DISCORDIA!
	  KALLISTI        HAIL ERIS 		ALL HAIL DISCORDIA
	 Founded by Hassan i Sabbah, 1090 A.D. (5090 A.L., 4850 A.M.)
	 Founded by Hassan i Sabbah, 1090 A.D. (5090 A.L., 4850 A.M.)
	 King Kong Kabal
	 N.Y.C. Cabal
	 Reformed by Adam Weishaupt, 1776 A.D. (5776 A.L., 5536 A.M.)
	 Reformed by Adam Weishaupt, 1776 A.D. (5776 A.L., 5536 A.M.)
	 Stijevoort, 1524.
	"But nobody Wants it! Everybody hates it."
	"Everything is true - Everything is permissible!"            -><-
	"Hah," She thought, "Here shall be a new game."
	"I actually solved this problem some years ago," Rybicki writes, "for
	"I am filled with fear and tormented with terrible visions of pain.
	"In a way, we're a kind of Peace Corps."
	"Maya is marvelous" I was thinking when I rapped on the little metal
	"O! Eris! Blessed Mother of Man! Queen of Chaos! Daughter of Discord!
	"Surrealism aims at the total transformation of the mind
	"Tell me, you dumb beast." demanded the Priest in his commanding voice,
	"What is this?" mumbled one to the other, "A religion based on The
	"When your brother leaves the residence of Being, he shall not reside
	"Why are you despondent?" demanded Void, "Your new brother will have
	(HBT; The Book of Advise, 1:3)
	(HLRSAIEI) 
	- Maj. A. Lincoln German, Training Director of the
	--Albert Einstein
	-Flemish Poet Jan Van 
	-Josh the Dill
	-Rev. Thomas, Gnostic
	-Robert Anton Wilson
	1) ARE YE A HUMAN BEING AND NOT A CABBAGE OR SOMETHING? The Initiate
	1021 'D' Street, Sacramento CA 94814
	2) THAT'S TOO BAD. DO YE WISH TO BETTER THYSELF? The Initiate answers
	3) HOW STUPID. ARE YE WILLING TO BECOME PHILOSOPHICALLY ILLUMINIZED?
	4) VERY FUNNY. WILL YE DEDICATE YESELF TO THE HOLEY ERISIAN MOVEMENT?
	5) THEN SWEAR YE THE FOLLOWING AFTER ME:
	Actually, the PRINCIPIA is the work of a time-travelling
	Ah, I get spaced just thinking about it. Good luck on the Principia.
	An Ordained POEE PRIEST/PRIESTESS or a CHAPLIN.
	And Five Days Prior to This Occasion The Apostle The Elder
	And POEE =POPE=.
	And She taught order and disorder to play with each other in contest
	And again he plunged into the physical orgy and completed the task, and
	And find ye delight in Her Great Surprise!
	And so we suffer because of the Original Snub. And so a Discordian
	And with those words, each looked at the other in absolute awe. Omar
	As I cabled over Nob to San Francisco's Station 'O' Post Office I
	As she had promised, she maneuvered earthly happenings so that Paris
	At first, the things brought forth by Eris were in a state of chaos
	At which moment She turned herself into an aspirin commercial and left
	Athena offered him Heroic War Victories, Hera offered him Great
	Before he became a hermit, Zarathud was a young Priest, and took great
	Considering current developments--you know the ones I speak of--it
	DISORDER is simply unrelated information viewed through some
	Darra Bazar, Kohat
	Dear Brother Mal-2,
	Discordia
	Do you believe that?
	During the next months they studied philosophies and theologies, and
	Engrossed in establishing order, She finally one day noticed disorder
	Episkopos Mordecai, Keeper of the Notary Sojac, informs me that you
	Eris had been born pregnant, and after 55 years (Goddesses have an
	Eristic Horde
	FLIEGENDE KINDERSCHEISSE!
	FLYING BABY SHIT!!!!!
	Finally Zeus calmed things down and declared that an arbitrator must
	For full benefit to the Head, this book should be read in
	Forthcoming Doom to All Men Impending. And He Shall Signal 
	HBT; The Book of Explanations, Chap 2
	HBT; The Book of Gooks, Chap. 1
	HBT; The Book of Predictions, Chap. 19
	HBT; The Book of Predictions, Chap. 19
	Hail Eris. All hail Discordia. Fnord?
	He did just as the Zen Master instructed. His meditation was
	I found him in the Temple PO Box busy wrapping up the new Fourth
	I have it on good authority that he is one of the most
	I understand that he has consented to write an Afterward to
	In 1968, virtually nobody had heard of this wonderful book. In
	In conclusion, there is no conclusion. Things go on as they
	In fact you might still push Vennard's The Federal Reserve Hoax:
	In response to your request for unclassified agitprop to be inserted
	In the Erisian Archives is an old memo from Omar to Mal-2: "I find the
	In the beginning there was VOID, who had two daughters; one (the
	International Arms and Hashish Inc.
	It applies however, to a closed system, to something that is an
	It has been ten years since I net the mysterious Malaclypse the
	It seems that Zeus was preparing a wedding banquet for Peleus and
	It turned out I was among the last to see Malaclypse. As subsequent
	Just prior to the decade of the nineteen-sixties, when Sputnik was
	Look into the Chao if thou wantest to know
	MAO BUTTONS and Whittier Shall be Known as The Region of Thud
	Malaclypse Shall Walk the Streets of Whittier Bearing a Sign
	Munching the tasty grass, The Sacred Chao replied "MU".*
	Now all of this time, Void was somewhat disturbed. He felt unsatisfied
	Now, at last, the truth can be told.
	Now, three of the invited goddesses,*** Athena, Hera, and Aphrodite,
	OH. WELL, THEN STOP.
	Oh, and we have some good news for you, Brother Mal! You know that
	One day Mal-2 asked the messenger spirit Saint Gulik to approach the
	One day Zarathud took his students to a pleasant pasture and there he
	Our teachings are not, need I remind you, available for publication.
	POEE proclaims that the other division is preferable, and we work
	POEE subscribes to the Law of Fives of Omar's sect. And POEE also
	Reality is the original Rorschach.
	Respectfully,
	Seek into the Chao if thou wouldst be wise
	Seek the Sacred Chao - therein you will find the foolishness of all
	Some Great Books are recognized at once with a fusilade of critical
	THE ARGUMENT BY FEAR and in an ominous voice ask "Do you know what
	THE ARGUMENT BY SEMANTICAL GYMNASTICS and say that he is absolutely
	THE BLIND ASSERTION and say "Well, He Is a girl, and His name is
	THE FAITH BIT: "But you must have Faith! All is lost without Faith! I
	THE FIGURATIVE SYMBOLISM DODGE and confide that sophisticated people
	THE FIRST CLAUSE PLOY wherein you point to all of the discord and
	THE PARATHEO-ANAMETAMYSTIKHOOD OF ERIS ESOTERIC (POEE)
	THE PURPLE SAGE
	That is, in any given situation, less organization, more chaos, is
	That this brother, having no form, was to reside with Aneris in
	The Aneristic Principle is that of APPARENT ORDER; the Eristic
	The California State Bureau of Furniture and Bedding
	The Curse of Greyface included the division of life into
	The HIGH PRIEST, the Polyfather.
	The LEGIONNAIRE DEACON, who is catching on.
	The Law of Fives is never wrong.
	The Law of Fives states simply that: ALL THINGS HAPPEN IN FIVES, OR
	The Nagas of Upper Burma say that the sun
	The SOCRATIC APPROACH is most successful when confronting the
	The belief that "order is true" and disorder is false or somehow
	The general location of our US HQ, incidentally, has been nearly
	The legendry, the mystery, the cult grew slowly. By the mid-1970's,
	The point is that (little-t) truth is a matter of definition
	The second concept Wiener has to establish is that of entropy.
	The tendency for entropy to increase in isolated systems is expressed
	The two were dazed and neither moved nor spoke for several minutes.
	The whirlpools that swirl in a direction opposed to the main current
	There is the neophyte, or LEGIONNAIRE DISCIPLE.
	They awoke to the sound of pins clattering, and found the bowlers
	They discussed their strange encounter and reconstructed from memory
	This Event by Seeking the Poor and Distributing to Them Precious
	This being the 4th Edition, March 1970, San Francisco; a revision of
	This made Eris angry, and so She fashioned an apple of pure gold**
	To choose order over disorder, or disorder over order, is to accept a
	Two young Californians, known later as Omar Ravenhurst and
	Upon hearing this, absolutely nobody was enlightened. Primarily because
	WHAT BOTHERS YOU, MAL? YOU DON'T SOUND WELL.
	WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH THAT, IF IT IS WHAT YOU WANT TO DO?
	WIECZNY KWIAT WTADZA!!!!!
	We look at the world through windows on which have been drawn grids
	Western philosophy is traditionally concerned with contrasting one
	What's in a Chao and why it ain't so!
	When Hypoc was through meditating with St. Gulik, he went there into
	When I read the ILLUMINATUS trilogy I resolved to again find and
	When the 1000 PRINCIPIAS were gone the GREATER POOP stopped
	When the ILLUMINATUS trilogy appeared in 1975, my co-author, Bob
	When the sisters heard this, they both confronted Void and pleaded
	Why not? We felt that this book was a true Classic (literatus
	With our concept making apparatus called "mind" we look at reality
	With this in mind, they studied the strange yin-yang. During a
	You hold in your hands one the Great Books of our century fnord.
	by Rev. Dr. Mungojerry Grindlebone, KOB
	for All Literates to Read thereof: "DOOM", as a Warning of
	for These Five Days.
	is afraid to venture out at night.
	of Limbo; and Master Pastor of the Church Invisible of
	shines by day because, being a woman, it
	the Laughing Christ, Hidden Temple of The Happy Jesus,
	the Law of Fives is one of the oldest Erisian Mysterees. It was first
 
 
 
 				  KONG
 	and all that resembles it"
   
   
   						      ___   ___
               			     by Lord Omar
                                                            19
                                                ODD# II/2,xii;68Chs3136
                                            People in a Position to Know, Inc.
                            /  \
                            \  /
                         His worrying and meditation were disturbed when, as
                    -- -- -- -- --                          -- -- -- -- --
                    SM BT PD PP SO                          SM BT PD PP SO
         (If temporary, also give an address from which mail can be forwarded)
       Genuine and authorized by The House of Apostles of ERIS
       RECOGNIZE that the -- DISCORDIAN SOCIETY -- doth hereby certify
       The Law of Fives
      POEE					Holy Cow, and
     6  7  8  9 10   6  7  8  9 10          10 11 12 13 14  45 46 47 48 49    
     6  7  8  9 10  23 24 25 26 27           8  9 10 11 12  62 63 64 65 66    
     6  7  8  9 10  53 54 55 56 57           7  8  9 10 11  19 20 21 22 23    
     7  8  9 10 11  66 67 68 69 70           8  9 10 11 12  32 33 34 35 36    
     For the Bureaucracy
     HBT; The Gospel According to Fred, 3:1
    10 11 12 13 14  15 16 17 18 19          12 13 14 15 16  54 55 56 57 58    
    10 11 12 13 14  41 42 43 44 45          14 15 16 17 18   7  8  9 10 11    
    11 12 13 14 15  11 12 13 14 15          15 16 17 18 19  50 51 52 53 54    
    11 12 13 14 15  28 29 30 31 32          13 14 15 16 17  67 68 69 70 71    
    11 12 13 14 15  58 59 60 61 62          12 13 14 15 16  24 25 26 27 28    
    12 13 14 15 16  71 72 73  1  2 Dsc      13 14 15 16 17  37 38 39 40 41    
    15 16 17 18 19  20 21 22 23 24          17 18 19 20 21  59 60 61 62 63    
    15 16 17 18 19  46 47 48 49 50          19 20 21 22 23  12 13 14 15 16    
    16 17 18 19 20  16 17 18 19 20          20 21 22 23 24  55 56 57 58 59    
    16 17 18 19 20  33 34 35 36 37          18 19 20 21 22  72 73  1  2  3 Afm
    16 17 18 19 20  63 64 65 66 67          17 18 19 20 21  29 30 31 32 33    
    17 18 19 20 21   3  4  5  6  7          18 19 20 21 22  42 43 44 45 46    
    20 21 22 23 24  25 26 27 28 29          22 23 24 25 26  64 65 66 67 68    
    20 21 22 23 24  51 52 53 54 55          24 25 26 27 28  17 18 19 20 21    
    21 22 23 24 25  21 22 23 24 25          25 26 27 28 29  60 61 62 63 64    
    21 22 23 24 25  38 39 40 41 42          23 24 25 26 27   4  5  6  7  8    
    21 22 23 24 25  68 69 70 71 72          22 23 24 25 26  34 35 36 37 38    
    22 23 24 25 26   8  9 10 11 12          23 24 25 26 27  47 48 49 50 51    
    25 26 27 28 29  30 31 32 33 34          27 28 29 30 31  69 70 71 72 73    
    25 26 27 28* 1  56 57 58 59 60          29 30 31  1  2  22 23 24 25 26    
    26 27 28 29 30  26 27 28 29 30          30 31  1  2  3  65 66 67 68 69    
    26 27 28 29 30  43 44 45 46 47          28 29 30 31  1   9 10 11 12 13    
    26 27 28 29 30  73  1  2  3  4 Cfn      27 28 29 30  1  39 40 41 42 43    
    27 28 29 30 31  13 14 15 16 17          28 29 30  1  2  52 53 54 55 56    
    30  1  2  3  4  35 36 37 38 39     [1991 = 3157][Next St. Tibs Day in 3158]
    31  1  2  3  4   5  6  7  8  9      Dec  2  3  4  5  6  44 45 46 47 48    
    31  1  2  3  4  31 32 33 34 35      Aug  4  5  6  7  8  70 71 72 73  1 Bcy
    and the wisdom of a child.
    for the Disciples of Discordia
   -Isaiah 16:11				walls)
   ..... fl. oz.   Last time you had a haircut:		Reason:
   1) Chaos - Patron Apostle Hung Mung
   1) Mungday					   1) Chaoflux
   1) Sweetmorn			  are named from the five Basic Elements:
   2) Boomtime			  SWEET, BOOM, PUNGENT, PRICKLE, and ORANGE
   2) Discord - Patron Apostle Dr. Van Van Mojo
   2) Mojoday					   2) Discoflux
   3) Confusion - Patron Apostle Sri Syadasti
   3) Pungenday
   3) Syaday					   3) Confuflux
   4) Bureaucracy - Patron Apostle Zarathud
   4) Prickle-Prickle
   4) Zaraday					   4) Bureflux
   5) Maladay					   5) Afflux
   5) Setting Orange
   5) The Aftermath - Patron Apostle The Elder Malaclypse
   A. Miscellaneous Avatars
   A. Office of My High Reverence, The Polyfather
   A. The Breeze of Wisdom	and/or	The Wind of Insanity
   A. The Five Apostles of ERIS
   A. the Bureau of Erisian Archives
   Address_____________________________________________________________
   B. Council of POEE Priests
   B. The Breeze of Integrity 	and/or	The Wind of Arrogance
   B. The Fifth Column
   B. The Golden Apple Corps (KSC)
   B. the Bureau of The POEE Epistolary, and The Division of Dogmas
   C. Episkoposes of The Discordian Society
   C. POEE =POPES= everywhere
   C. The Breeze of Beauty	and/or	The Wind of Outrages
   C. The Bureau of Symbols,Emblems, Certificates and Such
   C. The LEGION OF DYNAMIC DISCORD
   D. Drawer "O" for OUT OF FILE
   D. Eristic Avatars
   D. POEE Cabal Priests
   D. The Breeze of Love	and/or	The Wind of Bombast
   D. The Bureau of Eristic Affairs, and The Administry for The Unenlightened
   E. Aneristic Avatars
   E. Lost Documents and Forgotten Truths
   E. Saints, Erisian Avatars, and Like Personages
   E. The Breeze of Laughter	and/or	The Wind of Bullshit
   E. The Bureau of Aneristic Affairs, and the Administry for the Orders of
   For the Encouragement of Liberation of Freedom, and/or the Discouragement
   For the Eristocracy and the Cabalablia
   For what is left over
   I have ceased raping little children []yes []no -- reason .......... 
   I would rather a. live in an outhouse b. play in a rock group c. eat
   I, (complete Holy Name, with Mystical Titles, and degrees, designations,
   Professional: On another ream of paper list every job since 1937 from which
   Race: []horse []human      I.Q.: 150-200  200-250  250-300  over 300
   Surrealists, Harlequinists, Absurdists and Zonked Artists Melee
   b. POEE  c. Bavarian Illuminati d. All of the Above  e. None of the Above
   caterpillars.  I wear obscene tattoos because ..........
   f. Other-- BE SPECIFIC!
   hours   
   list all major psychic psychotic episodes experienced within the last 24
   you have been fired. Medical: On a separate sheet labeled "confidential"
  - The Book of Uterus 1;5
  OPOVIG    HIGH PRIEST POEE
 ALL HAIL DISCORDIA!
 Fnord, Fnord,  Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord
 STARBUCK'S PEBBLES					Which
 This Mysteree Rite is not required for initiation, but it is offered by many
 [H.B.T. ; The Gospel According to Fred, 1:6]
 dancing star! 
 to give birth to a
" This book is a mirror. When a monkey looks in, no apostle looks out."
"And God said, behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which is upon
"And, behold, thusly was the Law formulated: Imposition of Order = escalation
"But there is no house next door."
"Courtesy in the Corridors and on the Stairs" that he enjoyed. Name some
"Did you know that there is a million bucks hidden in the house next door?"
"Everybody I know who is right always agrees with ME" -Rev Lady Mal
"Ewige Blumenkraft!"
"Gentlemen," he said, "why does Pickering's Moon go about in reverse orbit?
"Grasshopper always wrong in argument with chicken"
"I should have been a plumber."
"KALLISTI" is Greek for "TO THE PRETTIEST ONE" and refers to an old myth about
"No? Then let's go build one!"
"Nothing is true. Everything is Permissible"
"O" for OUT OF FILE.
"Of course I'm crazy, but that doesn't mean I'm wrong. I'm mad but not ill"
"Offender of The Faith." Discovered the Five Commandments. Patron of the Season
"Ol' Limb' Peak."
"PRINCIPIA DISCORDIA or HOW THE WEST WAS LOST" published in New Orleans in
"SOMEBODY HAD TO PUT ALL OF THIS CONFUSION HERE!"
"Since the Babylonian Captivity there has existed a determined,
"Study Demonology with an Enemy This Sunday"
"The tide is turning... the enemy is suffering terrible losses"
"There are trivial truths & there are great truths. The opposite of a
"Wherefore my bowels shall sound		    -I Kings 14:10 (This 
"You will find that the State is the kind of ORGANIZATION which, though it
"common sense is what tells you that the world is flat."
"horns" are supported by another set, of inverted "horns". Or maybe it is
"kallisti" that appears on the title page and lastly on the back cover came
"why don't you do something worthwhile. What is your Purpose in Life, anyway?"
'44. 
( ) Council of Episkoposes: Office of High Priesthood, Sect of the POEE 
( ) Drawer o
( ) the Golden Apple Corps  (X)House of Disciples of Discordia
(A.I.S.B.), headquartered here in the United States.
(Brothers of the Ancient Illuminated Seers of Bavaria sect may wish to
(HBT; The Book of Advise, 2:1)
(Hashishim) by Hassan i Sabbah, with secret teachings based on Alhazred,
(The Priest here leads the Initiate in a recital of THE ERISIAN AFFIRMATION.)
(X) Official Business		( )Surreptitious Business     page 1 of 1 pages
(concepts). Different philosophies use different grids. A culture is a group
(counting the bottom)?			     legend of Snow White and The Seven
(no meat on Friday), of Judaism (no meat of Pork), of Hindic Peoples (no meat
(previously not apparent because everything was chaos). There were many ways
* "Limbo Peak" refers to Old Limbo Peak, commonly called by the Greeks
* "MU" is the Chinese ideogram for NO-THING
* I checked this further with Mr. Thornley. He says that the woman in question
* Not to be confused with The Apple Corps Ltd. of those four singers. We
* Or maybe it was 1958, I forget.
* The Greek geometrician PYTHAGORAS, however, was not a typical aneristic
* This doctrine should not be confused with DOGMA III - HISTORY #6, "HISTORIC
* This is called THE DOCTRINE OF THE ORIGINAL SNUB
** The LAW OF NEGATIVE REVERSAL states that if something does not happen then
** There is historic disagreement concerning whether this apple was of
*** Actually there were five goddesses, but the Greeks did not know the Law
*THE PINEAL GLAND is where each and every one of us can talk to Eris. If you
- that it might not become lost among Precepts of Order in the Region of
-- the PRINCIPIA was actually the work of the Sufi Order. A third, very
-------------
-------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------Pun-jab is Sikh, Sikh, Sikh!--------
--Lord Omar
-><-
-Nietzsche
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26
1) Om your next birthday, return to the place of your birth and, at precisely
1) The Priests and four Brothers are arranged in a pentagon with the Initiate
1. Before the beginning was the Nonexistent Chao, balanced in Oblivion by the
1. HUNG MUNG
1. Polite children will always remember that a church is the ______ of _____.
1. SAINT SECOND CLASS
1. The Military Order of THE KNIGHTS OF THE FIVE SIDED TEMPLE. This is for all
1. There came one day to Lord Omar, Bull Goose of Limbo, a Messenger
1. Today's date				Yesterday's Date
1. Write the ERISIAN AFFIRMATION in five copies.
1. Ye have locked yerselves up in cages of fear--and, behold, do ye now
10. And it came to pass that on the fifth night he dreampt, and in his
10. During and after the Fall of the Establishment of Bureaucracy was the
10. The Earth quakes and the heavens rattle; the beasts of nature flock
11. Herein was set into motion the Eristic Pattern, which would Repeat Itself
11. Indeed do many things come to pass.
11. Thereupon the Angel Commanded to Lord: Take ye this Honest Book of
14. Wipe thine ass with what is written and grin like a ninny at what is
1965 in five copies, which were mostly lost.
1965. I worked for a guy on Bourbon Street who was a Xerox salesman by day.
1970,hundreds of people coast to coast were talking about it and asking the
2) All persons in the audience and the pentagon, excepting the Priest, assume
2) When you have done this, write to me and I'll tell you what to do next.
2. And the Angel of Eris bade of the Lord: Go ye hence and dig the
2. DR. VAN VAN MOJO
2. LANCE SAINT
2. Purpose of this application: --membership in : a. Legion of Dynamic Discord
2. Sign and nose-print each copy.
2. The Political Order of THE PARTY FOR WAR ON EVIL. This is reserved for
2. Whereupon, by an Act of Happenstance, the Hodge began gradually to
2. Ye have cast out yer brothers for devils and now complain ye, lamenting,
24,902.20656 by 61 and you get the distance of moon's orbit around the earth.
3) The Priest begins:
3. All Chaos was once yer kingdom; verily, held ye dominion over the entire
3. And though Omar did bid of the Collector of Garbage, in words that were
3. LIEUTENANT SAINT
3. Name_________________________		Holy Name________________ 
3. SRI SYADASTI SYADAVAKTAVYA SYADASTI SYANNASTI SYADASTI CAVAKTAVYASCA
3. Send one to the President of the United States.
3. So Omar went forth to the Sacred Mound, which was to the East of
3. So in the beginning was the Primal Chaos, balanced on the Edge of Oblivion
3. The Academic Order of THE HEMLOCK FELLOWSHIP. They commonly inhabit schools
4) All present rejoice grandly. The new Brother opens a large jug of wine and
4. At the end of five days and five nights of digging, it came to pass
4. BRIGADIER SAINT
4. Description: Born: []Yes []No   Eyes:[]2 []other 	Height:
4. O how the darknesses do crowd up, one against the other, in ye hearts! What
4. Send one to
4. The Social Order of THE CITIZENS COMMITTEE FOR CONCERNED CITIZENS. This is
4. Whereupon, by the Law of Negative Reversal,** the Podge swiftly
4. ZARATHUD THE INCORRIGIBLE, sometimes called ZARATHUD THE STAUNCH
5) The Ceremony generally degenerates.
5. An Age of Confusion, or an Ancient Age, is one in which History As We
5. And therein emerged the Active Force of Discord, the Subtle Manifestation
5. FIVE STAR SAINT
5. History: Education - highest grade completed 1 2 3 4 5 6 over 6th
5. Hung Mung slapped his buttocks, hopped about, and shook his head, saying "I
5. Nail one to a telephone pole. Hide one. And burn the other.
5. Omar slept.
5. THE ELDER MALACLYPSE
5. The Sacred Order of THE DEFAMATION LEAGUE. Not much is known about the D.L.,
5. Verily, verily I say unto you, not all the Sinister Ministers of the
6. An Age of Bureaucracy is an Imperial Age in which Things Mature, in which
6. Forasmuch as it was Active, the Force of Discord entered the State of
6. On the fifth day of his sleeping, Lord Omar fell into a Trance, and
6. Sneaky Questions to establish personality traits 
7. An Age of Disorder or an Aftermath is an Apocalyptic Period of Transition
7. And the Angel of Eris bade of the Lord: Go ye hence and lift the
7. And under Eris Confusion became established, and was hence called
7. Never write in pencil unless you are on a train or sick in bed.
7. Self Portrait
8. But Omar lamented, saying unto the Angel: What is this shit,man?
8. By the by it came to pass that the Establishment of Bureaucracy perished
9. And, lo, the Angel waxed in anger and Omar was stricken to the Ground 
9. Thus it was, in accord with the Law of Laws.
>From this it may be concluded that Eris has usurped Eros (god of erotic love)
A =POPE= is someone who is not under the authority of the authorities.
A B C D E F G H I J  K  L  M  N  O  P  Q  R  S  T  U  V  W  X  Y  Z
A Discordian Society Legionnaire is one who prefers not to create his own
A GAME
A Head Doctor of Deep Africa and Maker of Fine Dolls. D.H.V., Doctor of Hoodoo
A Joint Effort of the Discordian Society
A Non-prophet Irreligious Disorganization
A SERMON ON ETHICS AND LOVE
A Sage of Ancient China and Official Discordian Missionary to the Heathen
A ZEN STORY
A hard nosed Hermit of Medieval Europe and Chaosphe Bible Banger. Dubbed
A jug of wine,
A leg of lamb
A person belonging to one or more Order is just as likely to carry a flag of
A serious young man found the conflicts of mid 20th Century America confusing.
A wandering Wiseman of Ancient Mediterrania ("Med-Terra" or middle earth), who
A) APOSTLE HOLYDAYS				B) SEASON HOLYDAYS
ACTUAL, ARE MORE CAPABLE OF PERFECTION.
AN EPISKOPOS OF THE DISCORDIAN SOCIETY
AND SAN FRANCISCO DISCORDIAN SOCIETY CABAL BULLETIN AND INTERGALACTIC REPORT &
ANERISTIC ILLUSION. Some grids can be more useful than others, some more
ARE DIVISIBLE BY OR ARE MULTIPLES OF FIVE, OR ARE SOMEHOW DIRECTLY OR
ARTIST.
ASCII pebbles -DtC] REALLY form a pentagon?
Adrift like a Lunatic Lifeboat Crew
Advertisement
Aftermath, an Age of Disorder in which calculation, computations, and
Agents will contact you shortly.
Ahua, 8 Cumhu, Mayan date. Revived by Abdul Alhazred in his infamous Al Azif,
Albuquerque, NM) and ZEN WITHOUT ZEN MASTERS by Camden Benares (And/Or
All statements are true in some sense, false in some sense, meaningless in some
An Erisian Hymn
An Illuminated Mind can see all of these, yet he does not insist that any one
An ORDAINED POEE PRIEST or PRIESTESS is defined as "one who holds an
And follow the Way it carries you,
And so it is that we, as men, do not exist until we do; and then it is that we
And so thank you for your insight, it may well be the clue to the mystery of
And they started fighting, and they started throwing punch all over the
And thou!
And when men become free then mankind will be free.
And with that he revealed his scroll. It was a diagram, like a yin-yang with
And, in return, Aneris swore that no matter how many existent things Eris
Aneristic Illusion. They do not know that they belong to Orders of Discordia.
Apostle. Lord Omar claims that Dr. Mojo heaps hatred upon Patamunzo, who sends
Apr  1  2  3  4  5  18 19 20 21 22      Oct  3  4  5  6  7  57 58 59 60 61    
Are not far apart in Discordian Eyes.
As a public service to all mankind and civilization in general, and to us in
Aztec Legend of QUETZLCOATL?		     very MENTION of the FORBIDDEN
B.C. Possibly it was he who taught the inner-teachings to Conan of Cimmeria
BEFORE THE GODDESS ERIS, I (name or holyname), do herewith declare myself a
Barnum, I'm not sure. The jumping man on page 12 is from an advertisement. I
Bavaria. 
Bavarian Illuminati
Bavarian Illuminati, working together in multitudes, could so entwine the land
Be Ye Not Lost Among Precepts of Order...
Begin waving your arms in any elaborate manner and make motions with your hands
Beside me,
Blfffffffffffft!
Brother Ram,
Building, a most pregnant manifestation of straightjacket order resting on a
Buns).
Buns, and ruminate a bit about It All.
Bureaucracy; while over Bureaucracy Eris became established, and was hence
But also I sympathize with artists who must own and sell their works to earn a
But we know.
Button and Distributed to The Poor in The Region of Thud if he does not get
C) ST. TIB'S DAY - occurs once every 4 years (1+4=5) and is inserted
CANNOT SWALLOW HIS NOSE BUT HIS BROTHER CAN, HAS BEEN EXPOSED! IT IS MR.
CHORUS
CONVERSATION:
CYCLES," which states that social progress occurs in five cycles, the first
Care: Celestial Hotel (Suite #666)
Chao, so that they can put "KSC" after their names.
Chaos. Holyday: Jan 5.
Chapter 1, THE EPISTLE TO THE PARANOIDS
Chief Sun Flower Seed and the squaw Merry Jane. Patron to psychedelic type
Chinee. He who originally devised THE SACRED CHAO. Patron of the Season of
Climb into the Chao with a friend or two
Commerce, the Black Lotus Society, the Republican Party, the John Dillinger
Comparable to Lt/Saint but has an established following (fictional or
Concubine of Confusion! O! Exquisite Lady, I beseech You to lift a heavy burden
Confusion becomes entrenched and during which Balanced Balance,or
Confusion, wherein It copulated with the Queen and begat ERIS, Our Lady of
Confusion. For further information, consult your pineal gland.
Convictions cause convicts.
Corrections to last week's copy: Johnny Sample is offensive cornerback for the
Curse of Greyface, THE TURKEY CURSE is here passed on to Erisians everywhere
DESPITE strong evidence to the contrary, persistant rumor has it that it was
DISCORDIAN SOCIETY
DUTY: It shall be the duty of all persons playing "SINK" to help find more
Days of the Week*                 * The DAYS OF THE WEEK
Dear God;
Dedicated to an Advanced
Department of Comparative Realities, was assigned the Trust of the POEE Scruple
Dexter [to Ignotius]: That was me in that scene.
Dexter: He got our names mixed up.
Dexter: I don't much go for the worship business but I argee with Occupant
Dexter: I sort of enjoyed the confusion part.
Dexter: I think that George Dorn took too much guff from Hagbard. If someone
Dexter: I'll get it.
Dexter: I'm speaking figuratively of course. I'll tell you more tomorrow.
Dexter: You speak for yourself.
Dexter[to Gypsie]:It's a telegram for you, from Mal2.
Die For You Society, and the Camp Fire Girls. It is still useful to continue
Discord and Gross Manifestation of the Nonexistent Chao.
Discordian thought; it wasn't Garrison's Xerox, it was his mimeograph; and it
Discordians have a tradition of assuming HOLY NAMES. This is not
Discordians. Patron of the Season of Confusion. Holyday: May 31. NOTE: Sri
Do You Remember?
Do these 5 pebbles [note: they were pebbles,originally..try doing
Doings
Don't let THEM immanentize the Eschaton.
Dr. Mojo is an imposter and that PATAMUNZO LINGANANDA is the True Second
Dream a Messenger of Our Lady who told him of a Sacred Grove wherein
Dream he had a Vision, and in this Vision there came unto him a
Dull but Sincere Filler
ERIS
ERIS - GODDESS OF CHAOS, DISCORD & CONFUSION
ERIS CONTEMPLATES FOR 3125 YEARS
ERIS ESOTERIC. The first part can be taken to mean "equivalent
ERIS spelled fore-part-aft-wards is RISE. And spelled inside out is REIS,
ERIS!" Shrewedly observe if the subject is convinced. If he is, swear him into
ERISTIC ILLUSION.
Each occurs on the 5th			        Each occurs on the 50th
Edition of PRINCIPIA. He seemed impatient with me, insisting that he didn't
Elements, SWEET, BOOM, PUNGENT, PRICKLE, and ORANGE. Aneris, however, had been
Emperor Norton, Count Cagliostro, Guilliame of Aquaitaine, etc.
Episkoposes are developing separate paths to the Erisian mountain top. See the
Erisian Movement but The Erisian Movement and it is The Erisian Movement. And
Eristic propensity of the Pentagon site.
Esoteric, with the Authority invested at me by the High Priest of It, Office
Every man, woman and child on this Earth is a genuine and authorized Pope
Everybody understands Mickey Mouse. Few understand Herman Hesse. Only a
Everywhere people are hurting one another, the planet is rampant with
Ewige Blumenkraft! HAIL ERIS.
Example: St. Quixote (Don Quixote, Cervantes)
Example: St. Yossarian (Catch 22, Heller)
Excellent Goddess-Saturated Saint.
FBI.
FIFTH EDITION							ODD# Infinity
FIVES. 
Face the particular greyfaced you wish to short-circuit, or towards the
Face to fact with the mighty forces and elements of nature, the thoughtful man
Feb  5  6  7  8  9  36 37 38 39 40           9 10 11 12 13   2  3  4  5  6    
Fight till you're deceased.
Fight your little battles.
Finally even the box was closed. But over the years I noticed that copies were
Five Times Over Seventy-three Times, after which nothing would happen.
Fnords ->Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord,
For Office Use Only -- acc. rej. burned
For Your Enlightenment
For the Greater Glory,
Form, more or less, and such times are Ages of Balanced Unbalance, or
Fortunately, you have before you a handbook that will show you how to discover
From: MAD MALIK Hauptscheissmeister
G.H. Hill: Since then I have given up anarchy. Too many rules-- hating the
GODDESS OF CONFUSION
GOLDEN APPLE OF DISCORDIA to symbolize the ERISTIC PRINCIPLE.
GP: Even false things?
GP: How can that be?
GP: Is Eris true?
GP: Is that the answer to my question?
GP: Is there an essential meaning behind POEE?
GP: Maybe you are just crazy.
GP: Why do you deal with so many negatives?
GP: Will you develop that point?
GRAND OPERA					pisseth against the wall..."
GREATER METROPOLITAN YORBA LINDA HERALD-NEWS-SUN-TRIBUNE-JOURNAL-DISPATCH-POST
GREATER POOP:Are you really serious or what?
GREYFACE
GYPSIE SKRIPTO [in response to a question]: ...1969 but only briefly. I guess
Garrison investigated Thornley). --GS
Gathered in discussion of the dropping of The Bomb;
Gen. Pandaemonium, Commanding
General License was Sgt. Pepper's Commander
Gentlemen, there are nipples on your chests; do you give milk? And what,
Gland" 
Glands have perverted the Free Spirit of Man, and subverted Life into a
Go To Your Left-Right....
God's name is ERIS, and that He is a girl?" If he should answer "Yes." then he
Goddess and request Her presence for some desperate advice. Shortly afterwards
Goddess directs him. He speaks for himself and for those that say that they
Goddess known to the Greeks as ERIS and to the Romans as DISCORDIA. This was
Goddess of Confusion? It is utter madness!"
Gold and how the fuck did we manage to fit inside of a tiny post office box
Good Saint material and definitely inspiring.
Grand (and gory) Old Discordja!
Grand (and gory) Old Discordja!
Grand (and gory) Old Discordja!
Great Seal to Jefferson in the garden that night. The Illuminated tradition
Greatest Association of What-ever-it-is-that-we-are." Lady Mal thinks of it as
Greeks, but that they cannot be trusted with historic matters. "They were,"
Greyface and his followers took the game of playing at life more
Greyface, got it into his head that the universe was as humorless as
Guerrillas for World Peace. Patron of The Season of Discord. Holyday: Mar 19.
Gypsie [reading]: "If I told everybody how they could live inside of a post
Gypsie [to Hill] : What do you think of ILLUMINATUS?
Gypsie [to Hill]: And pacifism?
Gypsie [to Hill]: Did you really translate erotic Etruscan poetry?
Gypsie [to Hill]: Since you wrote it, I take it you are an anarchist?
Gypsie: ...what I really want to know is how can we all fit inside of a tiny
Gypsie: Can you use it without his permission?
Gypsie: Did you [Malik] have higher authority than the others?
Gypsie: Earlier you said that you met your objectives. Just what were those
Gypsie: Hey, guy, later. [to Hill]: Doesn't this leave you a little schizy?
Gypsie: How do you mean?
Gypsie: I have only one question left...
Gypsie: I'm reporting now, you talk.
Gypsie: Like what?
Gypsie: Perhaps. Later.
Gypsie: Specifically, what are some of the sources?
Gypsie: That name sounds familiar. Where is it from?
Gypsie: There are no real names at all?
Gypsie: To me?
Gypsie: Well, for one night anyway. The interview is in the PRINCIPIA.
Gypsie: What do you think about the PRINCIPIA now? Would you want to change it?
Gypsie: What's the other half?
Gypsie: Where did all the things in PRINCIPIA come from?
Gypsie: Will there ever be a Fifth Edition?
H.P. Lovecraft invented the NECRONOMICON. We answered according to our
HAIL HAIL HAIL HAIL HAIL ERIS ERIS ERIS ERIS ERIS ALL HAIL DISCORDIA!
HARVEY OSWALD?
HERE FOLLOWS SOME PSYCHO-METAPHYSICS.
HIP-2-3-4, HIP-2-3-4
HODGE. The Pentagon has several references; for one,, it can be taken to
HOLYDAYS
HOW TO BECOME A POEE CHAPLIN
Hail Eris.						T'AI
Hall: Oh, some. Camden Benares is a real name because he legally changed his
Hand of Eris, however, is not intended to be taken as satanic, for the
Have a friendly class talk. Permit each child to tell any part of the unit on
Have you ever SECRETLY WONDERED WHY          IS there an ESOTERIC ALLEGORY con-
Have you ever secretly				HYGIENE
He answers YES.
He is an Indian Pundit and Prince, born of the Peyotl Tribe, son of Gentle
He went to many people seeking a way of resolving within himself the discords
Headmaster, Camp Meeker Cabal
Heaven is down. Hell is up.
Hemlock? I never touch the stuff!
Her
Her Apple Corps is strong!
Her Apple Corps is strong!
Her Apple Corps is strong!
Her geneology is from the Greeks and is utterly confused. Either She was the
Here is  a letter from A.I.S.B. to POEE:
Herewith your copy. DO NOT DIVULGE THIS INFORMATION - SECURITY E-5.
Herself to The Golden Apple Corps for the first time.
Hey Man...Great! I feel goofy, the way my old man looks when he's drunk. 
Hill. He has also translated several volumes of Etruscan erotic
Hill: ...I do point out that it makes just as much sense from its own
Hill: A character can have a sign if I want it so.
Hill: But of course training contradicts Discordian principles.
Hill: He got mixed up about me too, in COSMIC TRIGGER. Bob says that when
Hill: I consider it a successful work and I wouldn't want to change it. In
Hill: I'm not sure I ever was one. Mal2 was not, Malik was. Personally I
Hill: If it is his? I don't know. I hope so. it means "left right" in Latin
Hill: It's OK, I'm half Gemini.
Hill: Its a name I came up with in the old days and never used it much. Its on
Hill: Nope. A spirit is a product of definition and the one who is doing the
Hill: Oh bull! Besides, I changed her so much the Greeks would never recognize
Hill: Oh, I changed a quote from Tom Gnostic on page 61 and I don't think he
Hill: Oh, I love it. I was finishing PRINCIPIA when Shea and Wilson were
Hill: Sure, but I used a pen name. I signed it "Robert Anton Wilson".
Hill: Taurus. That makes me a stubborn schizy.
Hill: There already is a Fifth Edition, by Mal2. It is a one page telegram
Hill: Weel, the poem on the front cover is by Walt Kelly and was spoken by one
Hill: Well you can look at it like that if you want to, but I created Mal2 to
Hill: Well, a full answer would take another book in itself. Most of the
Hill: Well, take a collage for example. Like the early one on page 36 of the
Hill: Well, that's hard to answer because it kept refining itself over the
Hill: Yeah, in a way that is right. That is why my name does not appear
Hill: Yeah. I get along better with rocks.
His name is Sanskrit, and means: All affirmations are true in some sense, false
Home Study Bible School; and F.I.H.G.W.P., Fellow of the Intergalactic Haitian
Honest Book.
I - There is no Goddess but Goddess and She is Your Goddess. There is no
I Tell You: One must 
I am chaos. I am the substance from which your artists and scientists build
I burst out with questions like whether he preferred Panama Red or Acapulco
I enjoyed each of these yarns and did my part to help spread them. I was
I have come to tell you that you are free. Many ages ago, My consciousness
I like ILLUMINATUS for the surrealism. A very effective method of writing.
I missed you guys.
I sometimes think of it as a disorganization of Eris Freaks. It has been
I told them it had been transmitted by a canine intellgence --
I've ever seen. The Lick Here Box on page 23 is one of many tidbits making the
I) The Out House
IF THE TELEPHONE RINGS TODAY..... WATER IT!
IGNOTUM PER IGNOTIUS: It's like hating your own fantasies.
II - A Discordian Shall Always use the Official Discordian Document Numbering
II) The House of the Rising Collapse
III - A Discordian is Required during his early Illumination to Go Off Alone &
III) The House of the Rising Hodge
INDIRECTLY APPROPRIATE TO 5.
IT IS SO WRITTEN! SO BE IT. HAIL DISCORDIA! PROSECUTORS WILL BE
IV - A Discordian shall Partake of No Hot Dog Buns, for Such was the Solace of
IV) The House of the Rising Podge
If a lot of people who receive this letter plant a few seeds and a lot of
If a quixotic socrates studied zen under Zorba...?
If he, wonder of wonders, still remains obstinate, then finally resort to:
If you are not hot for philosophy, best just to skip it.
If you can master nonsense as well as you have already learned to master
If you can't find the Polyfather, or having found him, don't want anything to
If you like Erisianism as it is presented according to Mal-2, then you may
If you think the PRINCIPIA is just a ha-ha, then go read it again.
If you want in on the Discordian Society then declare yourself what you wish
If you would rather not, then please pass this copy on to someone and perhaps
If your I.Q. is over 150, and you have $3,125.00 (plus handling), you might be
Ignotius: A perfectly normal pagan relationship.
Ignotius: Besides people confused him with Joe Malik in ILLUMINATUS.
Ignotius: Deities change things around all the time.
Ignotius: Here, here.
Ignotius: I am an athiest myself. There is no Greg Hill.
Ignotius: I got misquoted. Worse, I wasn't even in that scene and if I had
Ignotius: I'm a Whale.
Ignotius: Idealism lives with rules. Realism lives with rocks.
Ignotius: If you can live rewardingly with Goddess Eris you can live with any
Ignotius: Oh, is that what that was?
Ignotius: That is characteristic of the Discordian perspective.
Illumination. And it will teach you how to turn your miserable mess into a
In honor of this Incredible Event, this Holy Place is revered as a Shrine by
In other words, people invent gods and not the other way around. Later I
In parks. On lots. Public flower beds. In remote places. At City Hall.
In the 50's a female deity was blasphemy. In the 70's a humorous deity is
In the 50's my culture taught me that I was created by and for a deity, a
In the Los Angeles suburb of Whittier there lives a bowling alley, and within
In the meantime - plant your seeds.
In the year 1166 B.C., a malcontented hunchbrain by the name of
Inspiration to all men and a Scribe to the Gods.
Inspiration to all men and a Scribe to the Gods.
It also helps if one is absolutely zonked out of his gourd.
It is also the shape of the United States Military Headquarters, the Pentagon
It is called THE CURSE OF GREYFACE.
It is called THE SACRED CHAO. I appoint you Keepers of It. Therein you will
It is hovering o'er the table where the Chiefs of Staff are now
It is known that they now have absolute domination over all organized churches
It is not presently understood why men were so gullible at that
It is perplexing.
It is then repeated indefinitely, or for the first two thousand miles, which
It is written that when The Corps returns to The Shrine for the fifth time five
It says little,
It will advise you how to balance your Pineal Gland and reach spiritual
Jan  1  2  3  4  5   1  2  3  4  5 Chs  Jul  5  6  7  8  9  40 41 42 43 44 Cfn
Jerusalem, Mecca and Cairo, bearing a sign that seemed to read "DOOM". (This is
Joe. Malaclypse was actually Alan Watts, one heard. No,said another legend
Join in thickest fray;
Joyce's Finnegan's Wake, Burroughs Nova Express, the King James translation of
Jun  5  6  7  8  9  10 11 12 13 14           7  8  9 10 11  49 50 51 52 53    
Know It begins to unfold, in which Whatever Is Coming emerges in Corporal
LEGIONNAIRE OF THE LEGION OF DYNAMIC DISCORD. HAIL ERIS! HAIL HAIL! HAIL YES!
Lama. Inclosed are some plans for several new potential locations. Please
Later Omar activated the Hung Mung Cong Tong and ELF, on zenarchist
Law of Fives to be more and more manifest the harder I look."
Lay it before Kings of Nations and Collectors of Garbage. Preach from
Lo as the voice had predicted, the tea was bitter.
M2: Even false things are true.
M2: Everything is true.
M2: I don't know man, I didn't do it.
M2: Indeed! But do not reject these teaching as false because I am crazy. The
M2: No, of course not. That is just illustrative. The answer to your question
M2: No.
M2: There is a Zen Story about a student who asked a Master to explain the
M2: To dissolve them.
MAD MALIK: No wonder, he was pretty much a one man show then. We were just his
MAL-2: Sometimes I take humor seriously. Sometimes I take seriousness
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MOMOMOTO WHO CAN SWALLOW HIS NOSE. HE SWALLOWED HIS BROTHER IN THE SUMMER OF
MY HIGH REVERENCE MALACLYPSE THE YOUNGER, AB, DD, KSC, is the High Priest of
Mad Malik, Hauptscheissmeister; Resident for Norton Cabal
Magicians, and progeny the scientists, have always taken themselves and their
Magicians, especially since the Gnostic and the Quabala influences, have
Make a few copies of this letter (5 would be nice) and send them to friends of
Mal! If civilization makes it through this crises, our grandchildren will live
Mal-2 was once asked by one of his Disciples if he often prayed to Eris. He
Malaclypse the Younger KSC
Malaclypse the Younger, were indulging in their habit of sipping coffee at
Malaclypse.
Malignatius, KNS.
Malignatus, KNS, into his Discordian sect, The Ancient Illuminated Seers of
Malik: Come on Greg, you just think that we are your characters....
Malik: Mal2 once told me that pacifism was a dilemma. If everybody was a
Malik: No, [but I was allowed to speak in the POOP] because [Malaclypse the
Malik: Oh so what. Contradictions are nothing to Discordians.
Malik: Spirits don't have signs.
Malik: We have had this argument before, Reverend Doctor Brother. But wine
Malik: What you don't realize is that a spirit has a self identity.
Malik: [Anarchy] is also standing up and proceeding forward, fantasy rule or
Manifestations of Everyday Chaos
Mar  2  3  4  5  6  61 62 63 64 65      Sep  3  4  5  6  7  27 28 29 30 31    
Mary Jane says "Plant Your Seeds. Keep Prices Down."
Masons, the Rothchild Banks, and the Federal Reserve System, we now have
May  1  2  3  4  5  48 49 50 51 52      Nov  2  3  4  5  6  14 15 16 17 18    
May the Goddess put twinkles in your eyes.
May we warn you against imitations! Ours is the original and genuine
May you be free of The Curse of Greyface.
May you have the knowledge of a sage,
Meanwhile, at the Chinese laundromat...
Messenger of Our Lady who entrusted to him a Rigoletto cigar box
Metaphysical Reality and that The Erisian Movement is really more like a poem
Mine brain has meditated on the spinning of The Chao;
Mockery, and Friendship. And that She begat Forgetfullness, Quarrels, Lies,
Momomoto, Famous Japanese, can swallow his nose.
Mord says that Omar says that we are all unicorns anyway.
Mr. Momomoto's brother who swallowed Mr. Momomoto in the summer of '44.
Mr. Momomoto, famous Japanese who can swallow his nose,has been
Mullah, and thereupon he worked digging in the sand for five days and
Myself." 
NAMING OF OBJECTS is some times desirable. The object is named by the finder
NONSENSE AS SALVATION
NOTE: In the lore of western magic, the \/ is taken to symbolize horns,
Nam because it was turning the renaissance into a political revolution and was
New York Jets, not fullback as stated. Bobby Tolan's name is not Randy, but
No harm, though, in admitting that some of them can be found disguised in
No, we Erisians seldom pray, it is much too dangerous. Charles Fort has
Non-Being and then to leave her and, so that he might play with order and
Non-Being." "I see,"replied Void, "Then I decree the following:
Not for Circulation!
Note to POEE Priests:
Note: It is an Old Erisian Tradition to never agree with each other about
Nyx, goddess of night (who was either the daughter or wife of Chaos, or both),
O it cracked the Holy Punchbowl and it made the nectar leak;
O! Hail Eris. All Hail Dis-cord-ia.
O! Hail Eris. Blessed St. Elder Mal.
O! Hail Eris. Blessed St. Gu-lik.
O! Hail Eris. Blessed St. Hung Mung.
O! Hail Eris. Blessed St. Mo-jo.
O! Hail Eris. Blessed St. Zara-thud.
OF CHAINS!
ON NORBERT WEINER, NUCLEAR PHYSICIST
ON PRAYER
ORDER/DISORDER. They are the same!
ORDINATION AS A POEE PRIEST
Occupant: Brother needs some wine!
Occupant: Dilemma, Schilmemma. [to Gypsie]: What do you think of this, pretty
Occupant: Doesn't prove anything anyway.
Occupant: Eris told Mal2 what to use and where to find it.
Occupant: I choose Satyr.
Occupant: I do!
Occupant: I think paganism is a valid spiritual path. I encourage Erisianism
Occupant: Later then?
Occupant: See?
Occupant: So are other Erisians, like POEE.
Occupant: That's what She wanted!
Occupant: Well I can have a sign if I want to and screw both of you.
Occupant: You are smiling.
Occupant: You are supposed to be a pacifist.
Occupant: You didn't invent Eris. She caused you to think you created the
Occupant: You were inhabited by Malaclypse the Younger. He caused you to
Oct 24.
Of possible interest to all Discordians, this information is herewith released
Office of My High Reverence
Official
Official Discordian Document Number (if applicable): n/a
Official Proclamation -- ODD# III(b)/4,i;18Aft3135
Ohio!"
One day Mal-2 consulted his Pineal Gland* and asked Eris if She really created
Onward, Fruits of Islam,
Onwards Buddhist Priests.
Onwards Christian Soldiers,
Ordination Certificate from the Office of the Polyfather."
Originating Cabal: Joshua Norton Cabal - San Francisco
Oswald was buying the assassination rifle, my girlfriend was printing the
Our Goddess when She was Confronted with The Original Snub.
Our People's Underworld Movement sect in Larchmont, prefers "The World's
Over the Waves in whatever you do.
PERPETUAL DATE CONVERTER FROM GREGORIAN TO POEE CALENDAR
PISCES to AQUARIUS
PLANETARY Pi, which I discovered, is 61. It's a Time-Energy relationship
PLAYING GAMES.
POEE
POEE & It's Priests
POEE (pronounced "POEE") is an acronym for The PARATHEO-ANAMETAMYSTIKHOOD OF
POEE ASTROLOGICAL SYSTEM
POEE BROTHER of THE LEGION OF DYNAMIC DISCORD.
POEE LEGIONNAIRE DISCIPLES are authorized to initiate others as Discordian
POEE Priestly Things. A "POEE Cabal" is exactly what you think it is.
POEE Priests to proselytes who desire a formal ceremony.
POEE has 5 DEGREES:
POEE has no treasury, no by-laws, no articles, no guides save Mal-2's pineal
POEE has not registered,incorporated, or otherwise chartered with the State,
POEE is a bridge from
POEE, and POEE is grounded in his episkopotic revelations of The Goddess. He
POEE, then none of these Truths are binding, and it is a rotten shame that you
POINT. It may be vertical, horizontal, or else such, and it may be elaborated
POPE POOP.
POST OFFICE LIBERATION FRONT
PRINCIPIA were distributed by Mad Malik, Block Disorganizer, who had
PRINCIPIA. Each little piece was extracted from some larger work created by
PRINCIPLE, and instead of a Hodge spot on the Podge side, it depicts the
PS: PRIVATE - Not for publication in The Principia.
PURPOSE: To sink object or an object or a thing...
Part Five     The Golden Secret
Partake Joyously of a Hot Dog on a Friday; this Devotive Ceremony to
Patamunzo Lingananda School of Higher Spiritual Wisdom, Skokie.
Patron and namesake of Mal-2. Patron on The Season of The Aftermath. Holyday:
Pelias and Kull. Founding of the Illuminated Ones of Bavaria, by Adam
Pentaverse, but today ye was sore afraid in dark corners, nooks, and sink
Perfect Counterpushpull of the Hodge and the Podge.
Pilgrimage is sufficient and that it is prudent to never get around to actually
Plant your seeds.
Please do not use me for a reference
Preparation for the Return to Oblivion to be followed by a Repetition of the
Presidential Tier, Paradise
Press, Berkeley, California). "We are operating on many levels here",
Priestly Things, using the Principia Discordia as a guide. Your Official Rank
Principia/Malaclypse was a very personal work for me and actually took 10
Principle is that of APPARENT DISORDER. Both order and disorder are man made
Probability is a mathematical concept, coming from statistics. Entropy comes
Professor Ignotius. He ushered me into a spacious wood paneled and tapestry
Prolonged use in a darkened room may induce hallucinations or trigger
Pyramid has five sides? - 			behold, I will bring evil upon
Pyrotechnics of pure energy formed her flowing hair, and rainbows manifested
Q. "How come a woodpecker doesn't bash its brains out?" A. Nobody has ever
Questions
R=P-D+N. The collection of values of D (and of P) for all delegates is clearly
REALITY lying behind the ANCIENT	     TURN PALE with terror at the 
REV. DR. OCCUPANT: Malik was the only one he would ever let write for the POOP
RUB-A-DUB-DUB
RUB-A-DUB-DUB
RULES: Sinking is allowd in any manner. To date, ten pound chunks of mud were
Remonstrate against the popular Paganisms of the Day: of Catholic Christendom
Reproduce and distribute these cards freely- POEE Head Temple, San Francisco
Resurrection of the Freedom-flowing Chaos. HAIL ERIS!
Rev. Mungo
Revealed by the Apostle Dr. Van Van Mojo as a specific counter to the evil
SAMPLE MESSAGE: ("HAIL ERIS")
SERIOUS/HUMOROUS.
SINISTER DEXTER HAS A BROKEN SPIROMETER.
SINISTER DEXTER: It's OK with me. Fate is fate. I never much liked "Mad Malik"
SINK
SINK is played by Discordians and people of much ilk.
STEP 1. Write out the message (HAIL ERIS) and put all the vowels at the end
STEP 2. Reverse order (IEIASRLH)
STEP 3. Convert to numbers (9-5-9-1-19-18-12-8)
STEP 4. Put into numerical order (1-5-8-9-9-12-18-19)
STEP 5. Convert back to letters (AEHIILRS)
SYA-DASTI
SYA-DASTI KAVAK-TAV-YASKA
SYA-DASTI SYA-NASTI
SYA-DASTI, SYA-NASTI, SYA-DAVAK-TAV-YASKA
SYA-DAVAK-TAVYA
SYADASTI SYANNASTI SYADAVATAVYASCA SYADASTI SYANNASTI SYADAVAKTAVYASCA commonly
Saints.
Seal of the United States.
Seasons
Seek ye the Eye of the Hurricane.
She added, "victims of indigestion, you know."
She apparently embezzeled the Olympian Treasury and went to Brazil; whereupon
She heard this and then began to weep.
She opened a chain of whorehouses (which certainly would get a rise from the
She was not invited to the party that they held on Limbo Peak;*
Shea, and I both received hundreds of letters from people intrigued by the
Should you find that your own revelations of The Goddess become substantially
So She threw a Golden Apple, 'sted of turn'd t'other cheek!
Society Legionnaires. PRIESTS appoint their own DEACONS. The POLYFATHER
Some excerpts from an interview with Malaclypse the Younger by THE
Sparta. Anyway, everyone knows that the Trojan War followed when Sparta
Spoken. Take thine refuge with thine wine in the Nothing behind Everything,
Stagnation, is attained.
Stash, that ye may come to own it and, owning it, share it and,
Suddenly the place became devoid of light. Then an utter silence enveloped
Suffice it to say that Eris is not hateful or malicious. But She is
Summing the above equations, one for each delegate, gives S-S+NK, where K is
Syadasti should not be confused with BLESSED ST. GULIK THE STONED, who is not
System.
TAO FA TSU-DAN                                      FIND PEACE WITH A 
TELL NO ONE! ACCIDENTS HAVE A STRANGE WAY OF HAPPENING TO PEOPLE WHO TALK TOO
TESTS BY DOCTORS PROVE IT POSSIBLE TO SHRINK
THAT BLOWS NO MINDS. And remember that there is no tyranny in the State of
THE ANCIENT ILLUMINATED SEERS OF BAVARIA - VIGILANCE LODGE
THE DISCORDIAN SOCIETY
THE ERISIAN MOVEMENT				      HOUSE OF APOSTLES OF ERIS
THE FIVE ORDERS OF DISCORDIA ("THEM")
THE FOLLOWING FOUR CATAGORIES ARE RESERVED FOR FICTIONAL BEINGS WHO, NOT BEING
THE FOLLOWING IS QUOTED FROM BERGAN EVANS
THE GOLDEN APPLE CORPS
THE LAST WORD
THE LEGION OF DYNAMIC DISCORD:
THE PARATHEO-ANAMETAMYSTIKHOOD OF ERIS ESOTERIC (POEE)
THE RECENT EXPOSE THAT MR. MOMOMOTO, FAMOUS JAPANESE WHO CAN SWALLOW HIS NOSE,
THE REVELATION
THE SACRED CHAO is the key to illumination. Devised by the Apostle Hung Mung
THE TRUTH IS FIVE BUT MEN HAVE ONLY ONE NAME FOR IT.
THERE IS NO TRUTH
THIS IS A CHAIN LETTER.
THUS ENDS PRINCIPIA DISCORDIA
TO PERFORM THE TURKEY CURSE:
TO: REV. RAMPANT PANCREAS, tRRoCR(a)pttM; Colorado Encrustation
TRANSGRESSICUTED. 
TURNS are taken thusly: who somever gets the junk up and in the air first.
Take a foot stance as if you were John L. Sullivan preparing for fisticuffs.
Taoists. It is the HODGE-PODGE of the Erisians. And, instead of a Podge spot
Temple at 555 Battery Street to try for an interview.
Test Question from Topanga Cabal The Twelve Famous Buddha Minds School: If
That man lives best who's fain
The Chinese on the page is a grocery ad, I think. The Norton money on page 14
The Classical Greeks were not influenced by the Classical Greeks.  
The Classification of Saints
The Discordian Society has no definition.
The Eminent 16th Century Mathemetician Cardan so detested Luther that he
The FIRST ED PRINCIPIA, by the way, was reproduced at Xerox Corp when
The Five Apostles of Eris.
The GREAT PYRAMID has FIVE sides	     cealed in the apparently innocent
The Goddess Prevails.			have a one-man cabal.
The Goddess. But the Greeks had only a limited understanding of Disorder, and
The Golden Apple Corps* is an honorary position for the Keepers of The Sacred
The Hell Law says that Hell is reserved exclusively for them that believe in
The Hidden Temple of The Happy Jesus.
The Hidden stone ripens fast,
The High Priest makes no demands on his Priests, though he does rather expect
The Initiate answers PROBABLY.
The Initiate swears the following:                         DMTS
The Necronomicon.) In 1090 A.D. was the founding of The Ismaelian Sect
The PENTABARF was discovered by the hermit Apostle Zarathud in the Fifth Year
The PODGE of the Sacred Chao is symbolized as The Golden Apple of Discordia,
The POEE HEAD TEMPLE is the Joshua Norton Cabal of The Discordian Society,
The PRINCIPIA itself is a collage. A conceptual collage. All of it happens
The Pentagon represents the Aneristic Principle of Order and symbolizes the
The Polyfather stranded alone with his species.
The Polyfather wishes to remind all Erisians the POEE was conceived not as a
The Priest continues: THEN I DO HERE PROCLAIM YE POEE DISCIPLE (name),
The Romans left a likeness of Her for posterity-- She was shown as a grotesque
The Sacred Chao symbolizes absolutely everything anyone need ever know about
The Turkey Curse is designed solely to counteract negative aneristic vibes and
The Turkey Curse works. It is firmly grounded on the fact that Greyface and
The esoteric name for this symbol is THE FIVE FINGERED HAND OF ERIS, commonly
The foregoing document was revealed to Mal-2 by the Goddess Herself through
The human race will begin solving it's problems on the day that it ceases
The official symbol of POEE is here illustrated. It may be this, or any
The real reality is there, but everything you KNOW about "it" is in your mind
The results will be instantly apparent.
The seeds of the ORDERS OF DISCORDIA were planted by Greyface into his early
The sunny one in a tunic was the Reverend Doctor Occupant, the trim khaki and
The teachings of the Sri Syadasti School of Spiritual School of Spiritual
The theorem to be proved is that if any even number of people take seats at
The unfortunate result of this is that mankind has since been
The words of the Foolish and those of the Wise
The words you are now reading are your ordination.
Then consult your pineal gland.
There are four other
There are no particular qualifications for Ordination because if you want to
There are no rules anywhere.            Some Episkoposes
There is a lot of pirated stuff in the PRINCIPIA, especially in the margins.
There is serenity in Chaos.
There walked into the room a chimpanzee, shaggy and grey about the muzzle,
Thetis and did not want to invite Eris because of Her reputation as a
They looked around and saw that the bowlers were frozen like statues in a
This cryptographic cypher code is GUARANTEED TO BE 100% UNBREAKABLE.
This is St. Gulik. He is the Messenger of the Goddess. A different age from
This is an essential challenge to the basic concepts of all western occult
This is proven by the fact 
This is slightly less than the actual distance because we have not yet
This is to inform you that your current position as diety is herewith
Those biased by the Aneristic Illusion would say yes.
Those biased by the Eristic Illusion would say no. Criss-cross them and it is
Thud.
To be reserved for all human beings deserving of Sainthood. Example: St.Norton
To that end, POEE proposes the countergame of NONSENSE AS SALVATION. Salvation
To this end, we propose that man develop his innate love for disorder, and
To: Jehova Yahweh
Today's DATE: day of the Carrot 		yesterday's DATE: Yes    -><-
Transcribed to 1's and 0's by Druel the Chaotic, WPI Discordian Society
Trip 5!
Truth to thine bosom and cherish it. Carry it forth into The Land and
Truth, metaphysical reality, is irrelevant to grids entirely. Pick a grid,
Truth, that ye may come to know it and, knowing it, spread it and,
UPON SINKING: The sinked shall yell "I sank it!" or something equally as
Unbalanced Balance.
Understanding  of the Paraphysical
Universal Absurdity. Moreover, of Itself the Coming of Aftermath waseth a
Unlike a song, chants are not sung but chanted. This particular one is much
Used by Old Roman Discordians, Illuminatus Churchill, and innocent Hippies
V - A Discordian is Prohibited of Believing What he reads.
V) The House of Apostle of ERIS
VERSE
VERSE
Verily! So much for all that.
WHAT IS the TRUE secret SINISTER	     WHY do scholarly anthropologists
WHO IS the MAN in ZURICH		     WHAT REALLY DID HAPPEN 
WITHIN THE NEXT FIFTY-FIVEDAYS YOU WILL RECEIVE THIRTY-ELEVEN HUNDRED POUNDS
War among men.
Washington; and it was he who was the Man in Black who gave the design for The
We
We are returning to the two Zwack Cyphers for classified communications.
Wealth, and Aphrodite offered him the Most Beautiful Woman on Earth. Being a
Weishaupt, on May 1, 1776. He based it on the others. Weishaupt brought it to
Well, probably you do have one, and it's unfortunate because lopsided Pineal
Western Union Telegram
What care I for the Word and Sayings? What care I for the Inspiration
When I get to the bottom I go back to the top
Whenever I question him about this, he grows very evasive and attempts
Wherever. Whenever. Or start a plantation in your closet (but read up on it
Whistling in 
Why are we Here ? 				SUPPRESSED KNOWLEDGE
Will whoever stole Brother Reverend Magoun's pornography please return
Wisdom are true in some sense, false in some sense, meaningless in some sense,
Wisdom, Wilmette. 
Within your Pineal Gland                        Do Mortals bow;
Wizard" in a Single Weekend.
Word of Goddess. Consequently, if you prefer a Discordian Sect other than
YES, I'd like to know the Five Simple Actions that will turn Me into a "Mental
YES.
Yah, yah, yah,
Yah, yah, yah, yah.
You have built for yourselves psychic suits of armor, and clad in them, your
Younger. I was free lancing for the underground papers and went to POEE Hear
Younger] hated politics. He was infuriated with Johnson and nixon over Viet
Your acute observation that ERIS spelled backwards is SIRE, and your inference
Zambian cybernetics genius who joined us? Well, he has secretly co-ordinated
[A quick rap is heard on the door]
[NOTE: Erisians of The Laughing Christ sect are of the silly contention that
[Paper tearing]
[a final graphic was deleted here at the end DtC]
[diagram of HODGE/PODGE TRANSFORMER deleted... DtC]
[graphic deleted... if you wanna see it, READ THE BOOK]
[graphical stuff deleted -DtC]
[laughter]
[note: Graphic Cypher deleted  DtC]
____________________________
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a RENAISSANCE THINK TANK. Fang the Unwashed, WKC, won't say. You can think of
a book of sample seals from the U.S. Government Printing Office. Western Union
a different but completely equivalent problem, a generalization of the
a lighter heart, and perhaps gain a clearer understanding of it, and therefore
a machine got stuck and kicked out hundreds of pages of nothing but m's. He
a medical volunteer; before underground newspapers, Viet Nam, and talk of a
a misunderstanding. The sign actually read "DUMB". Mal-1 is a Non-Prophet.)
a neat little trick on me by having IBM make the Greek selectric typewriter
a pentagon on one side and an apple on the other. And then he exploded and
a splendid woman whose eyes were as soft as feather and as deep as eternity
a squatting position and return to a standing position. This is repeated four
a star.
a straightjacket affair and not the happy romance as men had known it.
a universe moving inexorably towards chaos moves towards increased order.
about the spirit of the thing. We live in a time of turmoil, the whole planet
about the weather, they know when the weather is wrong and will try to wait
about which
absolutely anything, and more! It even symbolizes everything not worth
absurdity of man's endeavours, then they will be able to pursue their art with
academic and sacred Orders.
accepted self defense yet I could never reconcile that with the ideal. I
access to blank forms. Rubber stamps came from all over the place and some,
accomplished time-travelers in the galaxy and has visited Earth many
across the continent, from New York to Los Angeles, from Seattle to St.
after Conan became King of Aquilonia. First brought to the western hemisphere
after Herself, "ERISTIC" because Being is anarchic. And then, in a mood of
again in Non-Being, but shall return to Me, Void, from whence he came. You
all Erisians. Once every five years, the Golden Apple Corps plans a Pilgrimage
all of those terrible things. She told him that She had always liked the Old
almost as unobtrusively as a cat-burglar creeping over a windowsill.
alone and new, and about the time that Ken Kesey took his first acid trip as
also careful never to contradict the occasional rumors that I had actually
altered Luther's birthdate to give him an unfavorable horoscope.
always have, getting weirder all the time.
always possible to rotate the table until at least two people are opposite
always say the same thing to each listener, and that other Episkoposes are
an allnight bowling alley and generally solving the world's problems. This
an integer and S=N(N-1)/2, the sum of the integers from 0 to N-1. It follows
anarchy. I am chaos. I am alive, and I tell you that you are free.
and Nyx's brother, Erebus, and whose brothers and sisters include Death, Doom,
and Rev. Dr. Occupant became Keeper of the Box. The newly published copies of
and Vexes, from The Greater Metropolitan Yorba Linda Jesus Will Save Your Bod
and a bunch of gods and goddesses like that.
and anybody could take anything out. It was a concept stew. The exchanging of
and are only discovered 50 years later, like MOBY DICK or Mendel's great
and disorder. To accomplish this, one need only accept creative disorder along
and dissolved as she spoke in a warm and gentle voice:
and false and meaningless in some sense.
and inscribed upon it KALLISTI ("To The Prettiest One") and on the day of
and is a perfect name for a libertarian anarchist. Actually in my kind of art
and meaningless in some sense, and true and false and meaningless in some
and meaningless in some sense, false and meaningless in some sense, and true
and other things apropos a naive young semiliterate dropout hippy writer. He
and other trash he was sitting on. He worried how would he know when the moon
and plant in a bunch of about 5, about half an inch deep. Don't worry much
and similar maniacs
and so the State does not recognize POEE or POEE Ordinations, which is only
and some whole graphics like the Sacred Chao and the Hodge Podge Transformer
and that all my ideas about his extraterrrestrial and extratemporal
and the muscle messages coordinated and unified or perhaps coded, continued to
and through it some chaos appears ordered and some appears disordered. Pick
and understand
and universities, and dominate many of them.
and went in every which way, but by the by She began playing with them and
and with
and yours to do with as you like. Conceptualization is art, and YOU ARE THE
annoying. It is not designed for use against negative eristic vibes, although
another grid, and the same chaos will appear differently ordered and
answers YES.
anthropologist from the 23rd Century. He is currently passing among us
anything right) the Serpent raised its head in the under-ground secret society
anyway.
anywhere on the PRINCIPIA and why it was published with a broken
apparant that their experience had been private.
apparent to all who compare the great number of things that do not exist with
appear convinced, then proceed to:
approaching completion, but hindered by fear and by misunderstanding.
arbitrary. The artificial concept of no-relation is the ERISTIC PRINCIPLE.
are a tribe
are all POEE priests anyway (as soon as I locate them). The point is that
are called "enclaves". And one of them is life, especially human life, which in
are mine but mostly I just found stuff and integrated it. Mostly I did
are orderly in their
are taken as more important than LIFE; rather than taking LIFE AS THE ART OF
are welcome to reveal that our oldest extant records show us to have been
around, and upon these cards were sometimes written verses, while upon
artists, clowns,
as Ken Kesey used to say.
as a computer specialist, bon vivant and philosopher named Gregory
as one who might be smitten deaf, saying only: 'Gainst the rules, y' know.
as though you were Mandrake feeling up a sexy giantess. Chant, loudly and
as well. Reference: DOGMA I, METAPHYSICS #3, "The Indoctrine of the Pineal
as you hurry along the Path.
asked if Shea and I had written it, or if we had copies available. Others
asked me if I wanted to drop mescaline and fuck all night and said he knew how
asking questions. You approach the innocent and simply ask "Did you know that
back to Chaos through the Screen of Oblivion into which the Age passeth,
be a POEE Priest then you must undoubtedly qualify. Who could possibly know
be achieved. CAUTION- all magic is powerful and requires courage and integrity
be assumed by his students at Norton Cabal. Professor Ignotum P. Ignotius,
be selected, which was a reasonable suggestion, and all agreed. He sent them
beautiful than others, some more pleasant than others, etc., but none can be
beautiful, joyful, and splendid one.
because it makes fun of itself. i think this is healthy.
becomes free to play disorder games just for the hell of it. He becomes free
been doing all this nose swallowing.
been then I would have said something else.
before Discordianism. And of course real people like Neils Bohr crop up in
before Kennedy was shot but had to be a couple of years after (but before
before platitudes, fill it up.
began to giggle. Mal began to laugh. Omar began to jump up and down. Mal was
behind-the-scenes under-the-table, atheistic, satanic, anti-Christian
believe it. But the outcome is certain, given the time. Our grandchildren,
better than you whether or not you should be Ordained?
between the 59th and 60th days of the Season of Chaos
book does.
bore the fruits of many things. These things were composed of the Five Basic
bosoms.
both sweet and bitter, to surrender back the cigar box containing the cards
branches of guerilla ontology.
brought forth, she would eventually find them and turn them into non-existent
bruised, and your spirit is broiled in the sun.
building a game foundation with creative/destructive as the essential
but I forget them.
but even then the danger isn't past.
but they are very ancient and quite possibly were founded by Greyface himself.
by Ala Hera, E.L., N.S.; RAYVILLE APPLE PANTHERS
by Camden Benares, The Count of Five
by Conan and taught to Mayan priesthood (Conan is Quetzlcoatl). That was 4
by an Invisible Hand and did not arise for five days and five nights.
by the Perfect Counterpullpush of the Podge and the Hodge.
called Discordia.
called a guerrilla mind theatre. Episkopos Randomfactor, Director of Purges of
called just SRI SYADASTI
can easily be cut out at last
cards are numbered in sequence around the table. If a delegate D originally
carried a scroll and walked to the young men.
catastrophic, abominable, and outrageous disasters will happen. Except, of
causes of disturbance in your school.
chaos stem from this source." Etc., etc., you know the stuff.
chapters. Many, who had already heard of the PRINCIPIA or seen copies,
characters and I used the other Cabals as sort of a laboratory. In return
choose to invent rules. Keep close the words of Syadasti: 'TIS AN ILL WIND
circa 800 A.D. (Al Azif translated into Latin by Olaus Wormius, 1132 A.D., as
civilization advances sufficiently for phase five.
claimed them as her own children. This deeply hurt Eris, who felt that Her
clearly:
co-written and passed back and forth and rewritten by each of us. The
commercial enterprise, and that you are requested to keep your cool when
commercial work.
complain that ye lack FREEDOM!
complaining to each other of the personal confusion they felt in their
compliment, the Principle of Disorder. The Orders are composed of persons all
concept, say 50% of the writing, 10% of the graphics, all of the layout.
concepts and are artificial divisions of PURE CHAOS, which is a level deeper
concerned, I have proven my point. Eris is a real deity and even though I
condition was one of suspension, and one noticed that the clock had stopped.
confronted The Sacred Chao while She was contentedly grazing.
confusion in the world and exclaim "Well who the hell do you think did all of
conjunction with THE ILLUMINOIDS by Neal Wilgus (Sun Press,
considered earth's atmosphere. So be it. Christopher Garth, Evanston
containing many filing cards, some of them in packs with rubber bands
control of Money. July 1, 1776 (correct that to May 1st, Vennard can't get
copyright--Reprint What You Like. I knew I was taking liberties and didn't
could have Helen (The Helen) then living with her husband Menelaus,King of
couldn't help but wonder at Goddess' hand in assigning street addresses to Her
counting the bottom?				the house of Jeroboam and will
course, from your seed's point of view.
create roles and those roles are being performed by us spirits.
created sterile. When she saw Eris enjoying Herself so greatly with all of the
creating order. And so She grouped some things with others and some groups
creative over the destructive is an all-creative trip composed of both order
cultures, see "reality" differently. It is only the ideas-about-reality
day of the Season				day of each Season
decided that I was doing some kind of conceptual art.
deck for his cave, but their import was lost for they were written in a
defining around here is me. Your identity is what I say it is. Just to prove
deity, including none at all.
deity,reversity beyond-mystique." We are not really esoteric, it's just that
delight in making fools of his opponents in front of his followers.
demanded their Queen back and that the Trojan War is said to be The First
designated by the Angel as The Honest Book of Truth, the Collector was to him
diagonal attack is restricted to diagonals slanting in one direction only.
die with the dying. This is revolution.
different that the revelations of Mal-2, then perhaps the Goddess has plans
direction of the negative aneristic vibration that you wish to neutralize.
discerned that the message could be read by standing on his head and viewing
disciples. They form the skeleton of the Aneristic Movement, which over
discovered it, the best way to keep its legend alive was to encourage
disguise like a cabbage or something.
disorder are all his creations and he may do with them as he wishes. Indeed,
disorder around them and conclude just the opposite. But anyway,
disorder, is unnecessary and undesirable.
disorder, reside with Eris in Being. But Eris became filled with sorrow when
disordered. 
disruptive. Indeed, the very concept of chaos was still considered
distribution contacts with the Aluminum Bavariati. Practical relations
do not know! I do not know!"
do what you like and tell us about it or if you prefer don't.
do with him, you are still authorized to form your own POEE CABAL and do
documentary evidence to prove all revolutions, wars, depressions, strikes and
does big things badly, does small things badly too."
does less,
don't believe a word he says fnord. He is a master of the deadpan
don't promote Erisianism as a serious religion....
done.
door and was greeted warmly by a huge beard who introduced himself as
drag!). If you want, you can reveal that it is located deep in the labyrinth
draw their energy from the whole, that are moving at least temporarily, in the
drought, and then praying fervently -- and then getting the entire village
each immediately claimed it to belong to herself because of the inscription.
elaborate development;* for another, it specifically accords with THE LAW OF
element not coincide with all the characters on their keyboard. So the little
eligible for a trial membership in the A.I.S.B.  If you think you qualify, put
elsewhere water becomes ice and melts; and then on other days it just rains.
emphasizes the Principle of Order and is antagonistic to the necessary
endeavor, he found that there was some old tea in a pan left standing from the
engaged in their game and the waitress busy with making coffee. It was
enhanced by the use of a Leader to chant the Sanskrit alone, with all
equivalent to strife and treated as a negative. "No wonder things are all
especially the horns of Satan or of diabolical beasties. The Five Fingered
essay on genetics. The PRINCIPIA DISCORDIA entered our space-time continuum
even so the concept of number 5.
ever comes first.
ever did forgive me for it. He's right. Starbuck's Pebbles should have been
every Golden Apple Corps is the beloved home of a Golden Worm.
everywhere.
exert their influence and Hypoc succummed to the pressure and he denied the
existent things She had borne, Aneris became jealous and finally one day she
existing between sun and inner plants and I use it in arriving at many facts
experience showed me that any deity is true in some sense and false in some
explained that.
exposed. It was recently revealed that it was Mr. Momomoto's brother who has
exposed; and so we will be moving for the first time this century (what a
extract from your environment and then assemble into an original relationship.
factual). Example: St. Bokonon (Cat's Cradle, Vonnegut)
fair, because POEE does not recognize the State.
fear ye more that what ye have wroughten?
fear, and therefore without frustration, and therefore with good will in his
fearlessly contemplates his place in the great cosmic scheme.
female, is an idea about sex. To say that male-ness is "absence of
female-ness", or vice versa, is a matter of definition and metaphysically
finally gave up on that one too. Actually I just gave up on idealism.
finally. These are Ages of Unbalanced Unbalance.
find anything you like. Speak of Me as DISCORD, to show contrast to the
find at this address which I have written down for you. Do not speak to those
find the goddess Eris				To Diverse Gods 
find the significance of it, but were disappointed to uncover only
firm foundation of chaos and constantly erupting into dazzling disorder; and
first edition of PRINCIPIA on Jim Garrison's Xerox. It wasn't my girlfriend,
first for that). For casual planting, its best to soak them in water for a day
first was napalming farmers and the second was executing your parents. The
five nights, but found no book.
flattered Aneris and smoothed the friction a little that was between them. 
followed a 5-pointed Star through the alleys of Rome, Damascus, Baghdad,
for a ride, then I get to the bottom and I see
for he had created only physical existence and physical non-existence, and had
for nature. Don't soak them if its wintertime. Seeds are a very hearty life
for their just protection.
for what ever that may turn out to be.
for you as an Episkopos, and you might consider creating your own sect from
force--worshipers of Mamon--whose undying purpose is world control through the
form and strongly desire to grow and flourish. But some of them need people's
formulation in all human thought.
frequently interrupted by worries. He worried whether or not the resr of the
from Omar, and I was the official anarcho-pacifist for the Cabal. Also I was
from an ugly and barbarous existence that is the result of taking order so
from blowing yourselves up for only two more generations, then we will finally
from my heart!"
from physics. It is the assertion-- established logically and experimentally--
from the vaults of A.I.S.B., under the auspices of Episkopos Dr. Mordecai
from this play and for the next five zillion years She amused Herself by
frustrating, unhappy and hopeless mess.
frustration, and frustration causes fear. And fear makes for a bad trip. Man
fully established in Atlantis, circa 18,000 B.C., under Kull, the galley slave
gain more effective magic. CHAOS IS ENERGY.
games, and to take turns amusing each other. She named the side of disorder
generations ago and that we are just playing with the world for a while until
girls may bicker as you wish, but My son is your Brother and We are all of
gland, and has only one scruple-- which Mal-2 keeps on his key chain.
going.
good will of them. The Office of The Polyfather is point, not to teach. Once
got the apple and he got screwed.
government and all that stuff.
grid with another grid, and amending grids in hopes of finding a perfect one
had many grand schemes which delighted Her.
hand full understood Albert Einstein. And nobody understood Emperor Norton.
happens to those who deny Goddess?" If he hesitates, don't tell him that he
has been decided to reveal a few more of our front organizations. Your
has been on a bad trip for a long time now.
have it. After 20,000 years, Kull's dream will be realized! We can hardly
have read all the way down to the very last word.
have the time or inclination for foolish questions from reporters. Undaunted,
have trouble activating your Pineal, then try the appendix which does almost
he went into a state of Deep Sleep which lasted for 5 eras. At the end of this
he, and he began to teach that play was sinful because it contradicted
healthy young Trojan lad, Paris promptly accepted Aphrodite's bribe and she
help to get started. Plant your seeds.
her.
herewith Require of Ye:
him Archangle Pythagoras.
himself down on the sand, using as a pillow a Golden Chest he had
hip. Then put him on your mailing list.
his followers absolutely require an aneristic setting to function and that a
his share with you." "But Father, Aneris and I have been arguing, and she will
hobbies.
holes.
hooting and hollering to beat all hell. And amid squeals of mirth and with
humorously. Either way it is irrelevant.
hung parlor where three others were laughing and passing around a wine jug.
hung up on authority, security and control; i.e., they are blinded by the
huzzahs and gonfolons, like Joyce's ULYSSES. Others appear almost furtively
ideas and techniques broadened and encouraged all of us.
ideas-about-reality are mistakenly labeled "reality" and unenlightened
identity of the mysterious author, Malaclypse the Younger. Rumors swept
if in a test of his faith, ordure fell from the second floor onto him. At that
if introduced into a neutral or positive aneristic setting (like a poet
ignorant. The "socratic approach" is what you call starting an argument by
immortalis) and, since the alleged intelligentsia had not yet
imprison sons, children perish while brothers war. O, woe."
in a paper shortage.
in a while, he even listens.
in a world of authentic freedom and authentic harmony and authentic
in ancient China, it was modified and popularized by the Taoists and is
in some sense, meaningless in some sense, true and false in some sense, true
in the 50's and my young adulthood in the 60's. When I finally had the
in the GRID. That is the Aneristic Principle.
in the Truth, become a Poet of the Word and a Sayer of Sayings -- an
in the center facing the Priests. If possible, the Brothers on the immediate
in the eyes of those who read backwards; which obviously made Eros sorE. Then
in the new edition of PRINCIPIA, hope the following will be of use. And please
in the second law of thermodynamics-- perhaps the most pessimistic and amoral
in the world. It is also believed that they have been costuming cabbages and
in water or mud or anything you; can sink something in.
in which chaos was ordered and many ways in which it was not.
in which it did not happen.
independent writers of various kinds. Norton Cabal was just me and my
inert uniformity devoid of form, matter, hierarchy or differentiation.
injustices, whole societies plunder groups of their own people, mothers
inner parts for Kirharesh."			serious erosion of the mud 
intensified, and the pattern, previously established with the physical laboring
intention to use this old tea by diluting it with water. And again in his
interview the denizens of Joshua Norton Cabal of the Discordian Society.
intriguing myth held that Malaclypse was a pen-name for Richard M. Nixon,
is FIVE TONS OF FLAX!
is a flag.
is called [The Omnibenevolent Polyfather of Virginity in Gold].
is correctly seated, where R=P-D, unless this is negative, in which case
is historic,plus my little additions. The apple on page 17,as well as the
is in a state of change. If we, as a species, cower from the confusion then we
is mine although some things credited to either Mal2 or Omar were actually
is now, of course, in the hands of The Ancient Illuminated Seers of Bavaria
is one manifestation of
is one who prefers total autonomy, and creates his own Discordian sect as The
is really true, or that none at all is true. Stars, and pentagons, and
is to partake of No Hot Dog Buns.
isolated whole, not just a part. Within such systems there may be parts, which
issues of GREATER POOP revealed, he was to disappear and POEE business was to
it accomplished the objectives I set for myself and it has the effect I wanted
it any way you like.
it can be used as an eristic vehicle to introduce positive vibes into a
it sit steeping for 24 hours. It was dark and murky and it was Hypoc's
it to have. There are a few errors though.
it unto the Righteous, that they may renounce their ways and repent.
it upside down.
it was Kerry's; it wasn't the FIRST ED PRINCIPIA, it was some earlier
it, I'm going to change your name.
it.
it. Further, the lowest Rung in Hell is reserved for them that believe in it on
itself, and whose body was the spectacular dance of atoms and universes.
jeans was Mad Malik and the wine jug claimed to be Hill. I got the recorder
joyously partake of a hot dog.
just where Eris has been fucking around for 3125.
knowing, depicted by the empty space surrounding the Hodge-Podge.
known as the Illuminati, founded by Adam Weishaupt. There is considerable
labor of the preparations. It was then when deeply immersed in the pleasure of
last year, but that is still secret), the Students for a Democratic Society,
lawmakers, censors, and like ilk.
learned that ERIS or DISCORDIA was primarily feared by the ancients as being
left man, that he might develop himself. I return to find this development
left. I knew it was finished. I didn't know exactly what it was, but it was
less
level of concept.
liaison to The Ancient Illuminated Seers of Bavaria, the Chicago Discordians.
lies and myths we could devise fnord.
light, as though their very psyches had gone nova. Then vision returned.
like a harp for Moab, and mine			unsanitary practice caused
like himself recognize that Eris is a Figurative Symbol for an Ineffable
like the apple on page 27, I carved myself. A few I ordered to my
like what he says.
listed many factual incidences of ignorant people confronted with, say, a
little post office box?
living. Art, like knowledge, should be free fodder for everyone. But it isn't
ma'am? We don't get to hear your thoughts.
made it the Fifth Edition and then left.
madness, and together they declared themselves to be a society of Discordia,
magazine called Horseshit and put out by two brothers from Long Beach. I don't
magicians, scientists,
male population). I figure it to be this in particular because MADAM reads the
malleable art instead of an immutable Truth, and learn to appreciate the
manner.) 
many consultations with Her within his Pineal Gland. It is guaranteed to be
marginalia, dingbats, and pasted in titles and heads and things came from
matter how many of her begotten that Aneris would steal, She would beget more.
meaning of Buddhism. The Master's reply was "Three pounds of flax."
meaningless in some sense, and true and false and meaningless in some sense.
means
means a different person. Most of the non-credited, you know, Malaclypse, text
meditation one afternoon, a voice came to them:
membership roster is open to persons of all races, national origins and
metalic gold or acapulco.
metaphysical balance. when magicians learn to approach philosophy as a
midnight, noting your birth time and date of observation, count all visible
mimeographs, from Seattle Cabal. That group produced the best damn mimeography
mischievous, and does get a little bitchy at times.
misguided eristic setting. In this instance, it would be the responsibility of
moment of illumination, a man begins to be free regardless of his
moods, sometimes telling the truth, sometimes spreading the most Godawful
more True than any other.
more times. This dance is symbolic of the humility of we Erisians.
mostly a grass-roots version of the more professional military, political,
motivation is essential for self-protection.
movements,					IGNOTUM PER IGNOTIUS
mud. All power to the people, and ban the fucking bomb.
my specifications just as I conceived all the rest of you.
mysterious Man in Black who gave Jefferson the design for the Great
mysterious cypher. However, after 10 weeks & 11 hours of intensive scrutiny he
naked, to demonstrate that he is truly a human being and not something else in
named ANERIS. (To this day, the fundamental truth that Aneris is the larger is
nameless spirituality shall return to Void, like a tired child home from a
near San Francisco is an official POEE shrine.)
neglected the spiritual. As he contemplated this, a great Quiet was caused and
never got used. I should have used it when I had the chance. And then Eris did
newspapers and magazines mostly. Often from ads. With a collage you select and
night before, when he had in his weakness forgot about its making and had let
nineteen-fifties, just before the idea of RENAISSANCE became relevant....
no name at all.
nobody could understand Chinese.
nobody pays much attention to us.
nonattacking 'eight queens' problem for a cylindrical chessboard where
not!
not. The condition is the same.
noted that the Erisian Movement does not discriminate against werewolves-- our
nothing.
objectives?
objects to sink, once; one object is sunk.
observations of my own,
observe us without his presense causing cultureshock.
occultism since Solomon.
of Beef), of Buddhists (no meat of animal), and of Discordians (no Hot Dog
of Bureaucracy. Holyday: Aug. 12
of Dis-cord-i-a.
of Disorder!"
of Fives.
of Mr. and Mrs. VI?
of Our Lady who told him of a Sacred Mound wherein was buried an
of R, or else two delegates would be correctly seated at the same time.
of The Caterpillar. He found them carved in gilded stone, while building a sun
of all men? Wherein does it profit a man to be a Scribe to the Gods
of gaul and had married a Frenchman; but each of the sneaky goddesses tried
of his characters in Pogo. The government seals starting from page 1 are from
of mind and to be sitting in a still position, perhaps The Buttercup Position.
of order and has prevented man from effectively participating in the creative
of people with rather similar grids. Through a window we view chaos, and
of philosophers, theologians,
of sewers beneath Dealy Plaza in Dallas, and is presided over by The Dealy
of such object and whoever sinks it can say for instance, "I sunk Columbus,
of the Immanentizing of the Eschaton
of the Nonexistent Chao, to guide Everything along the Path back to Oblivion
of the Polyfather, The House of the Rising Podge, POEE Head Temple; Do
of the slide where I stop and I turn and I go
offers it to all who are present.
office box then everybody would stop paying landlords and go live inside their
offices collapsing all over the country, the hemisphere, the PLANET! The whole
offices, &tc.), Ordained Priest of the Paratheo-anametamystikhood of Eris
on 29 was a chapter title in one of Tim Leary's books. The Knight on the bull
on page 6 got into the act because I used to be a teletype operator and had
on the Hodge side, it has a PENTAGON which symbolizes the ANERISTIC
on the fifth night, and when they slept that night each had a vivid dream of
on the part of the magician. This ritual, if misused, can backfire. Positive
on top of the rubble in the northeast corner, face the corner, and meditate."
on....
only Love Vibrations in return. But we of the POEE sect know that Patamunzo is
opposite direction; in them order is increasing and chaos is diminishing.
opposites-- good/evil, positive/negative, male/female, etc. But due to the
or get on the letterhead.
or perhaps
or simplified as desired.
ordains priests. I don't know about the =POPES=.
ordeal, he begat a brother to Eris and Aneris, that of SPIRITUALITY, who had
order as an undesirable equal to destructive disorder.
order/disorder as the essential positive/negative polarity, instead of
ordered some of them just to see what would happen. Some pretty things arose
origin and delusions. Hah! I am not that easily deceived. After all, a
original name to his Holy Name. Also, instead of using Mordecai Malignatus I
other Discordians would bounce their stuff off of me. We would toss in ideas
other living beings whose ways of life differed from their own.
other sense. So I set out to do what my society told me is impossible--make a
others nothing was written.
ours called him Hermes. Many people called him by many names. He is a Roach
out "kallixti" and I was too dumb to know the difference.
out of nowhere (and still do ). And I would wonder what ever happened to
outposts. Mal2 had told me that Good Lord Omar always filed everything under
output, like the page head on 12 and other pages which is from a series of
over the new information coming out. Look, if you people out there can keep
overpower the Podge -- and the Primal Chaos thereby came to be.
overwhelmingly more probable than tighter organization or more order.
pacifist then everything would be perfect. But nobody is going to be a
pacifist unless I am first. But if I am and somebody else is not, then I get
page 38 of the PRINCIPIA referring to Vice President Spiro Agnew. I always
pairs of apparent or earth-plane opposites: ORDER/DISORDER and
participants chanting the English. it also behooves one to be in a quiet frame
particular evening the main subject of discussion was discord and they were
particular grid. But, like "relation", no-relation is a concept. Male, like
particular time, for absolutely no one thought to observe all the
particular, the Golden Apple Corps has concluded that planning such a
passing them off as human beings.
paste-ups done I knew that I had finished it. That is why, quote, Malaclypse
pentagon. Tell constricted mankind that there are no rules, unless they
people are forever perplexed by the fact that other people, especially other
people receive this letter, then a lot of seeds will get planted.
personality. He was what we call an EXPLODED ANERISTIC and an AVATAR. We call
perspective as all the others do from each of their own perspectives.
place and everything.
place.
play with The Goddess Eris. And know that it is a joyful play, and that
play with our world of existent things, and order and disorder them, and so it
plumbing fixtures would fall from the second floor bathroom to join the pipes
poetry, under another pen-name, and in the 18th Century was the
poor in the Region of Thud (which would be a mean thing to say), just shake
positive/negative. He has thereby caused man to endure the destructive aspects
possible and desirable; and that destructive order, like destructive
post office boxes. It would collapse the building! Can you imagine, post
pray tell, Gentlemen, is to be done about Heisenberg's Law?" He paused.
preceded by the Myth of Starbuck which was being saved for something else and
primal chaos.
principle of order.
principles, and also Operation Mindfuck. I was also into those. Though at the
probably is a fellow Erisian and so you can forget it. If he says "No." then
problem.
problems will vanish." "Indeed," said the other, "chaos and strife are the
proofs,
prove, by demonstration, that a deity can be anything at all.
publication is timely, so mention that in addition to the old fronts like the
publishing, Head Temple closed down and the Cabal just seemed to evaporate.
pulls a weapon on me, I'm more inclined to either leave or kill the
put-on, the plausible satire, the philosophical leg-pull and all the
quickly proceed to:
quotes from the PRINCIPIA with which we had decorated the heads of several
quotes. 
random around a circular table bearing place cards with their names, it is
real religion from a patently absurd deity.
reason that I am crazy is because they are true.
reckonings were put away by the Children of Eris in Acceptance and
recognize the style--a popular commercial artist-- but I don't know his name.
recognizes the holy 23 (2+3=5) that is incorporated by Episkopos Dr. Mordecai
references to Taoism, the Korean flag, and Technocracy. It was not until
relate it to the points on our grid, and thereby understand it. The ORDER is
relative to the grid one is using at the moment, and that (capital-T)
remained in the hands of concept artist G. Hill.
remember their names. Wonderful magazine.
replied with these words:
represent geometry, one of the earliest studies of formal order to reach
respective lives. "Solve the problem of discord," said one, "and all other
respond with:
reveal that political and economic control was generally complete several
revealed to Good Lord Omar and is one of the great contributions to come from
review and add any comments you feel pertinent, especially regarding the
rhythms. I am the spirit with which your children and clowns laugh in happy
right and left of the Priest should be Deacons. The Initiate must be totally
right, and that those impersonal forces are female and that Her name is ERIS.
roots of all confusion."
rose on the next night. He worried about what the people who walked through
rounds in alternative/underground newspapers in those days. Trip 5 page header
safeguard this letter, it may be an important document 
said. And from that, he deluded honest men to believe that reality was
same as a POEE PRIEST except that you don't have an Ordination Certificate.
same forwards and backwards. And further, it is a term of great respect,
satiric memo pads from Our Peoples Underworld Cabal. All page layout is mine
satisfaction. I hope I'm alive to see it, Mal, success is in our grasp. Twenty
say he is a shithead."
scratch, unhindered. Episkoposes are not competing with each other, and they
screwed up," they concluded, "they have got it all backwards." They found
screwed. He said that there were five choices under that circumstance. The
second American Revolution; in the comparative quiet of the late
sect. 
section "Discordian Society"
seeking funds for POEE Cabals or when spreading the POEE Word via the market
self-ordained Zen Master said to him, "go to the dilapidated mansion you will
sense, then each will expose the other for what it is: absurdity. From that
sense, true and false in some sense, true and meaningless in some sense, false
sense. A public service clarification by the Sri Syadasti School of Spiritual
seriously and so seriously fearing contrary orders and disorder, that GAMES
seriously than they took life itself and were known even to destroy
shall be that non-existence shall take us back from existence and that
shaman, occultists have been blinded to what is perhaps the two most important
sharing it, love in it and, loving in it, dwell in it and, dwelling in
shortened to THE HAND.
significant control of the Federal Bureau of Investigation (since Hoover died
significant. The 1969 Discordian Society was a mail network between
similar device to represent TWO OPPOSING ARROWS CONVERGING INTO A COMMON
similar to SIRE.
simultaneously. But visually it is a montage, passing through time, like a
sister was unjust (being so much larger anyway) to deny Her her small joy. And
sits down to a place card P, then the table must be rotated R steps before he
smaller) was that of BEING, named ERIS, and one (the larger) was of NON-BEING,
so She made herself swell again to bear more things. And She swore that no
some other artist and published and maybe copyrighted. I find them in
some ways it is immature and I am not the same person I was 10 years ago, but
sometimes called the YIN-YANG. The Sacred Chao is not the Yin-Yang of the
sometimes told quite different things in their Revelations, which are also the
sonofabitch. 
sought higher consciousness through assimilation and control of universal
soul and love in his being.
spacially locating the rest of Mal-2.
speak of Ben Franklin's private papers (!), but we are still suppressing
specific male deity, and that all other deities are FALSE. Yet my growing
specification, like on page 1. The quote on the top of page 8 might be from
spirit of Malaclypse.
spreading it, wallow in it and, wallowing in it, lie in it and ,lying
stars.
steadfast pomposity of ritualism inherited from the ancient methods of the
stealing his sacred thunder. So he trained me in Zenarchy, which he learned
still circulating, and that independent Discordian Cabal would occasionally pop
still considered impossible, ridiculous, and blasphemous. As far as I'm
still have chaos in one
stole some existent things and changed them into non-existent things and
stop bothering us with your incessant letters!
students and were usually off on errands. You worked for the POOP?
subject in an orderly and sober manner, thereby disregarding an essential
substitute the German:
subvert Dr. Mojo's rightful apostilic authority by shaking him out of his wits.
suffering from a psychological and spiritual imbalance. Imbalance causes
sure feel sorry for you if you don't have Faith." And then add:
sure, OK, I've never dropped mescaline in a post office box before.
surroundings. He becomes free to play order games and change them at will. He
sympathy for Her lonely sister, She named the other side "ANERISTIC" which
take him from me when she discovers him, and cause him to return to
taking itself so seriously.
talking about the PRINCIPIA, and since the original was out of print by
tea that involves you so." Hypoc heard the voice, but the struggle inside
tears on their cheeks, each appointed the other to be high priest of his own
terminated due to gross incompetence STOP  Your check will be mailed STOP 
than like a science and that he is liable to be turned into a Precious Mao
that N=2K+1, an odd number." This contradicts the original assumption.
that Omar was exhausted. So he put his shovel to one side and bedded
that he not forget them, his First Born. And so Void decreed thus:
that in times of medieval magic, the pentagon was the generic symbol for
that is the level of distinction making.
that reduces everything to an infinite aum. I found it at Western Union where
that some SWEAR is LEE			     TO AMBROSE BIERCE?
that the planets and stars 
that the principle of disorder was every much as significant as the
that the universe, by its nature, is "running down", moving toward a state of
that trip, he had a sudden loud clear voice in his head saying "it is bitter
that troubled him, but he remained troubled.
that will account for all reality and will, hence, (say unenlightened
that ye've been left to fight alone.
the 2nd Edition of 100 copies from Los Angeles 1969; which was a revision of
the 3rd Edition of 500 copies, whomped together in Tampa 1969; which revised
the Communist Party USA, the American Anarchist Assn., the Junior Chamber of
the Erisian Magician to manufacture the positive vibrations if results are to
the FBI computers with the Zurich System and our theoriticians are in ecstasy
the First, Emperor of the United States and Protector of Mexico (his grave
the Holy Bible (though not the Latin or Hebrew), and The Blue Book. Not to
the Legion of Dynamic Discord before he changes his mind. If he does not
the Real Imposter, and that those vibrations of his are actually an attempt to
the Stash, become a Poet of the Word and a Sayer of Sayings - an
the United States during the period that he was impersonating George
the Word of Goddess. However, it is only fair to state that Goddess doesn't
the Words of the Illuminated			Rated X... NATURALLY
the chimpanzee's diagram. Over the next five days they searched libraries to
the comparatively small number of things that do exist.)
the counter-establishment as the flag of the establishment-- just as long as it
the cover of the PRINCIPIA if I wanted to work for the GREATER POOP so I said
the darkness.
the dilemma. Zenarchists are trained in dilemma swallowing.
the exact opposite will happen, only in exactly the opposite manner from that
the face of the earth... to you it shall be for meat."
the fete She rolled it into the banquet hall and then left to be alone and
the integers 0 to N-1,each taken once, but so also is the collection of values
the kitchen where he busied himself with preparing the feast and in his
the last two ("the Bicycle") of which are CONSTERNATION and MORAL WARPTITUDE.
the money in a cigar box and bury it in your backyard. One of our Underground
the mythology and the controversy about it. Increasingly, people wrote
the presiding POEE Official (if any) responds:
the question of what can I use freely and what can I not is a very tricky
the radio came on by itself, and an ethereal female Voice said YES?
the room said about him.
the same person but is the same Apostle.
the sham of the Birchers that we are seeking world domination; so do not
the soldiers and bureaucrats of the world.
the supposition that they'll go there if they don't.
the two lost consciousness.
the ways of Serious Order. "Look at all the order around you," he
their cards. Assume the contrary. Let N be the even number of persons, and let
their names be replaced by the integers 0 to N-1 "in such a way that the place
them he had, except on Fridays whem I am more whimsical, in which case
them, and a great stillness was felt. Then came a blinding flash of intense
then laid bare like a turnip
then, xerox copies were beginning to circulate here and there.
there came to him in the Trance a Dream, and there came to him in the
thereby CAN BE REVOKED THE CURSE OF GREYFACE.
they are our brothers, how come we can't eat them?
they traced the Greek writing on the apple that they discovered the ancient
they would like to.
things for her own. (And to this day, things appear and disappear in this very
think about it. It may have stuck in my preconscious memory from early TV.
third was hypocrisy, the fourth was cowardice, and the fifth was to swallow
this building is one of our more cherished Erisian Shrines. Also it so happens
this edition. He'll probably contradict everything I've told you, but
this very place, in the Year of Our Lady of Discord 3125 (1959*), Eris revealed
this, wise guy?" If he says, "Nobody, just impersonal forces." then quickly
those.
thought I invented it but now it sounds like a Stan Freberg name now that I
thought it to be a negative principle.
thought of it first.
thought, and POEE is humbly pleased to offer the first breakthrough in
thoughtful.
thousand years....!
thousands of people, some as far off as Hong Kong and Australia, were
three ("The Tricycle") of which are THESIS, ANTITHESIS and PARENTHESIS; and
through the ideas-about-reality which our cultures give us. The
time I was masquerading in GREATER POOP as a created cabbage to throw off the
time two people walked into the room. The first asked the second who the man
time-travelling anthropologist would say just that, so that he could
timely introduction of eristic vibrations will neutralize their foundation.
times in the past,using such cover-identities as Zeno of Elias,
times over, than shall the world come to an end:
to Brunswick Shrine as an act of Devotion, and therein to partake of No Hot Dog
to a shepherd of Troy, whose name was Paris because his mother had had a lot
to ask  me if Timothy Leary had written it, and I almost always told
to be an underground work and that involves a different set of ethics than
to drop things in. But rivers - bays - gulfs - I dare say even oceans can be
to epilepsy.
to live half mad, half sane.
to outwit the others by going early and offering a bribe to Paris.
to persuade me that he is actually just another 20th Century Earthman
to play neither or both. And as the master of his own games, he plays without
to the effect that there is sexual symbolism here, have brought me to some
to the floor only inches from the pins that it had been sent to scatter. The
to the large room on the right of the main hallway, sit in the lotus position
to the legend that if you throw away a chain letter then all sorts of
to turn himself into a unicorn and there might be room for a tiny interview on
together and the nations of men flock apart; volcanoes usher up heat while
torn, and women look pale and ghastly when concealing a chilly dagger in their
toward the proposition that creative disorder, like creative order, is
triangle on 23 and the Sacred Chao on 50 are, believe it or not, pasteups of
trip composed of both the creative and the destructive. But to choose the
trivial truth is plainly false. The opposite of a great truth is also true."
trouble maker.*
true and false in some sense, true and meaningless in some sense, false and
twin of Ares and the daughter of Zeus and Hera; or She was the daughter of
two looked at each other, totally unable to account for the phenomenon. The
uncovered on the first day of his labors.
underpowered the Hodge and Everything broke loose.
undesired side effects. Should not be used in the presence of persons subject
unique to Erisianism, of course. I suppose that Pope Paul is the son
unknown to science. For example, multiply nude earth's circumference
unusually long gestation period-- longer even than elephants), Her pregnancy
used Bob Wilson's real name on page 12 because Werewolf Bridge was a work
used to sink a tobacco can. It is preferable to have a pit of water or a hole
used. 
uses of disorder. Civilization reflects this unfortunate division.
variety of comic positions, and that a bowling ball was steadfastly anchored
vast,cool,and unsympathic -- from the Dog Star, Sirius.
very wild circus.
vision is restricted, your movements are clumsy and painful, your skin is
voice. 
wages?
walrus tusks. I don't know what it is, to tell the truth.
want my intentions to be misunderstood. It was an experiment and was intended
was hidden a Golden Chest.
was not his girlfriend, she was just a friend, and it wasn't a couple of years
was sitting there was. The second replied "Some say he is a holy man. Others
wasn't just before Kennedy was shot but a couple of years before that.*
we come close to the 
weakness, chose without further consideration and plunged into the physical
werewolves, but this reference is not particularly intended and it should be
westerners) be True. This is illusory; it is what we Erisians call the
when the Scribes of the Governments do nothing, yet are paid better
wherever I found them--some of which is original but uncredited Discordian
which differ. Real (capital-T True) reality is a level deeper that is the
which is Ewige Blumenkraft in Polish.)
which is a unit of money, albeit Portugese-Brazilian and no longer in use.
which is located in Mal-2's pineal gland and can be found by temporally and
which is not the same as DOGMA I - METAPHYSICS #2, "COSMOLOGY" (Book of Uterus)
which represents the Eristic Principle of Disorder. The writing on it,
while down on earth			The meaning of this is unknown
who are intrigued
who ascended to the Throne of Valusia. Revived by Pelias of Koth, circa 10,000
who had allegedly composed the PRINCIPIA during a few moments of lucidity.
who live there; you must remain silent until the moon rises tomorrow night. Go
will be POEE CHAPLIN for the LEGION OF DYNAMIC DISCORD, which is exactly the
will surely be reincarnated as a precious Mao Button and distributed to the
wiped out in a torrential flood.
wish to from your own POEE CABAL as a POEE PRIEST and you can go do a bunch of
with
with others, and big groups with little groups, and all combinations until She
with the TV antenna on his helmet on page 46 came from a very artistic
with tribulation as have yer baseless warnings.
with, and equal to, creative order, and also willing to reject destructive
woman with a pale and ghastly look, Her eyes afire, Her garment ripped and
wondered why the Great				The Lord promised: "Therefore,
working on ILLUMINATUS. It took Dell five years to publish it...maybe that is
working out word rhythms) it will prove harmless, or at worst, simply
world's communication system would be destroyed. No,no, I must not say. I dare
writing credited to a name is a true person and almost always a different name
written the whole thing myself during an acid trip.
wrong, is the Aneristic Illusion. To say the same of disorder, is the
wrote to ask if it were real, or just something we had invented the way
xerography was a new technoloGypsie. Which was my second New Orleans trip in 
years to culminate. it was one single statement that included my adolescence
years. In 1969 I mainly though of myself as a cosmic clown and I set out to
yet upright to his full five feet, and poised with natural majesty. He
you again! Helter Skelter!
you will learn more
your head sadly and, while wiping a tear from your eye, go to:
your salvation through ERIS, THE GODDESS OF CONFUSION.
yours. Try to mail to different cities and states, even different countries.
{calendar entered by /AHM/THX }
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