From: noraa@cbnewsk.cb.att.com (aaron.l.hoffmeyer)
Newsgroups: alt.child-support
Subject: Re: OK girls!  It's that time of the month again!!!!
Date: 7 Jan 93 03:36:37 GMT
Organization: AT&T Bell Laboratories

In article <1993Jan6.131244.16142@ll.mit.edu> yasu@ll.mit.edu (Alan Yasutovich) writes about his latest local fathers' rights group meeting:

>                             ....it raised a question in my mind
>	about focus.  I guess the group is quite helpful when it
>	comes to individual council about what to expect in court,
>	and how to deal with things.  This tends to make one clearer
>	headed on the occasion by knowing what to expect.
>
>	But I was trying to re-focus this point by stating that
>	the monthly meetings *should* have more substance than just
>	summarizing stuff and signing new members.  And in that sense
>	it *should* be a bitch session about larger issues.

Alan, you make a very good point.  These meetings can be so much pissing
in the wind if there is NOT an agenda, a topic.  Your group can be 
effective if you invite people in power to come as guest speakers.  Or
you can invite speakers that have a relative experience in some topic
important to your mission.  But first, you have to know, and all agree
upon, a mission.

In general, everyone knows WHY these groups come together--to right
wrongs.  Define the wrongs as you see them, and propose solutions
(can anyone say, "mission statement?").  Then everyone can work on
those issues.  You can assign tasks to those who want to become
active.  There are many things to do.

In our local group, we ask for volunteers to go meet with state
legislators, speak to them about the wrongs and the proposed
solutions.  Give them concrete, verifiable information.  "Mr(s).
Representative, this is a copy of the Michigan Friend of the Court
law.  This law enforces visitation.  These are national US Census
statistics on how non-custodial parents who get ample visitation and
joint custody father pay their child support in full when they get to
see their children.  According to this article, Michigan has one of the
highest child support compliance rates in the US.  It also states that
Michigan spends less tax money on child support enforcement than most
other states per capita.  As a representative of group X of Mass., we
believe that this legislation, if enacted in this state, would reap
similar benefits for the state, for non-custodial parents and for
children."  I've done this and will do it again.  I even took 100 pages
that I called "Sentiments from the Net."

Of course, you need people to raise money, to testify at state hearings
(self-employed and retired people are excellent for this), to coordinate
a newsletter and meetings.  You should apply as a tax-exempt group and
try to get on the United Way's list of supported agencies.  

As you (your group) get more and more involved and start actively
tackling these issues, you may find you are making strange bedfellows.
One of the local groups that we are now working with is the National
Organization of Women through the Elizabeth Blackwell Center--we are
working with them to try and get the courts to push for mediation and
arbitration in divorce custody and visitation disputes--thereby
minimizing litigation expenses, court time and the time it takes to get
a divorce.  We are also working with them to produce a handbook for
divorcing parents, explaining the process, all the players involved,
the laws, etc.  Think of the validity it would give to this handbook to
have been created by and endorsed by BOTH groups.  Believe it or not,
most women think the divorce courts suck too and they want them changed
for the better.  And there are some very reasonable, intelligent women
involved in NOW and other similar groups.  

Start with a mission statement.  Don't write it together--that takes
forever.  Someone write one, get everyone to buy into it.  Then start
checking off the boxes.

This is part of the mission statement of FACE for Delaware Valley area
of Pennsylvania with some modifications by me.  Use it.  It's your's for
FREE.

What are XXXX's goals?

     *  Child custody awards that better serve children's best
	interests, whereby shared physical custody is made a legal
	presumption.

     *  Court enforcement of visitation and joint custody orders with
	sanctions equal to those applied in support enforcement.

     *  Education of policymakers and the public about the
	constitutional right of a child to full access to both parents
	and the extended family.

     *  Laws for the resolution of marital and custody disputes through
	mediation rather than litigation.

     *  Equal treatment under the law for both parents in Domestic
	Relations proceedings.

     *  Enactment of legislation to assure equitable child support and
	accountability.

     *  Enactment of legislation to tighten the evidence requirements
	for obtaining Protection From Abuse (PFA), Civil Protection,
	and Emergency Custody orders.  Also, tighter evidence
	requirements for allegations of abuse of any sort made during
	divorce proceedings, standard procedures for quickly
	investigation those allegations thoroughly, the removal of the
	presumption of guilt of the accused, and punitary measures when
	it turns out allegations were unfounded, false and made
	maliciously.

Such directives give you concrete goals to work towards.

Aaron (the one with headphones) Hoffmeyer
TR@CBNEA.ATT.COM 

"Rhythm is both a song's manacle, and it's demonic charge."
	- BAD II, The Globe
Newsgroups: alt.child-support