From: branwen@sage.cc.purdue.edu ( )
Subject: Being Gay
Organization: Purdue University Computing Center
Date: Tue, 12 Jan 1993 03:22:32 GMT

      Okay.  That does it.  The post by Mountain Man really "chapped
my butt cheeks" as he put it.  Mr., I'm not certain where you grew up,
(come to think of it, it is likely that you didn't--grow up that is),
but you have a lot to learn about being gay.  Not that I believe you could 
ever get your baseball, mom and apple pie mentality to admit anything near
to the truth about being gay.  But let's try anyway.

      Let's assume that your son turns out to be gay.  What do you do?  Do
you banish him from your home?  Do you disown him?  Do you pray to God that
he "repent his evil ways, and turn from this evil sin?"  Or do you sit down
with him and ask him "Son, how do you know you are gay?"
      What if he says "I just am.  How do you know you are heterosexual?" 
Do you call him a liar, say that it's different?  Do you bother to take the
time to hear what he has to say?  If not, thank God you are not my father.  
If you do listen, if you do possess the ability to understand and believe your
own son, then why can you not believe it when it is someone else's son who
says they are gay, that they didn't "choose" to be gay?

      I am a gay.  More properly, I am a lesbian.  I did not choose to be
lesbian.  Growing up in the Midwest does not really encourage anything even
remotely approaching tolerance or permissiveness.  For the first six years
after I hit puberty, I fought being gay tooth and nail.  After all, I wanted
The
my friends to like me.  I knew what happened to homosexuals when they died.
They went to hell.  I gre up Catholic.  I prayed for God to take away the
feelings I was experiencing.  I went out on dates with guys.  I even tried
to get engaged to cover up my shame.  But it didn't work.  I didn't like men
in a sexual manner.  I liked women.  I knew I was gay.  I didn't choose it.
But it is so.  I asked many of my heterosexual friends how they knew they were
heterosexual.  They said they just were.  I asked them if they chose to be
heterosexual.  Of course not.  They WERE heterosexual.  It wasn't a choice.
They never for an instant believed they could wake up tomorrow and just
"decide to be gay".  So how is it so difficult to accept the same answer from
me?
      My objection to the legislation in Colorado is not heterophobic.  It is
not based on hate.  My objection to the legislation in Colorado is based on
a firm belief that America is a nation for everyone.  That America is a
country that cannot legislate hetred.  That America is a nation where you are
accepted for whomever you are, white or black, Catholic or Jew, U.S. born
or immigrant, straight or gay.  When the state decided to offer a referendum
on anti-gay rights legislation, it asked the majority how it felt about
the minority.  That is un-American.  America is not just a nation of majority
rule.  Our founders envisioned a country where the minority would be
protected from the tyranny of the majority.  We have continually seen that when
given a choice in protecting the rights of the minority, the majority have 
always balked.  For the blacks, we had to fight a war.  For religious freedom
we had to move to different states (Rhode Island for one).  For women, we
couldn't pass the Equal Rights Amendment.  Those who have power NEVER give it
up.  The state of Colorado has further proven this.  For that, I deplore every
citizen of the state of Colorado that voted in favor of number 2.  I will
continue to boycott the state of Colorado (I ski in Vermont now) and hit that
state where it hurts--in the economy.  Mountain Man claimed that the citizens
love the short lines at the lifts.  Let's see what they think when the tourism
industry fails to give that 31% of the state revenue that it has consistently
supplied for countless years past.  You may have a shorter line at the ski lift,
but you will have longer unemployment lines, higher sales taxes, higher property
taxes, and will individually have to pay more for anything that your state has
the power to tax in order to make up for the losses.  And why?
      Because you could not stand to think that the man next door might be
gay and actually want to work in the same office that you work in.  Because
you couldn't stand the possibility that your boss might be forced to admit that
his best worker is gay, and have to keep him on the job anyway.  Because you
cannot accept that the person moving into your rental unit might be engaging
in same gender sexual activity in the privacy of his or her own home.  Because
you sir, are afraid.  Not a bigot, not a redneck, but a coward.

Karen

Newsgroups: alt.politics.sex