From: krikket@meltdown.chi.il.us (D. 'krikket' Krick)
Newsgroups: alt.sexual.abuse.recovery
Subject: Re: sexual addiction
Date: 29 Aug 92 00:04:13 GMT
Organization: The Meltdown - A Team Star BBS

Please note that I am responding to this article as it pertains to myself, and
myself only.  Margo may have meant another type of addiction that what I have
when she posted this message.

My addiction is to love and to relationships.  I have a hard time surving if I
do not have a S.O. that I am madly in love with...

NOTE:  This message is *NOT* intended to be a flame!!!

In article <CMM.0.90.2.714848886.margog@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu>,
margog@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu (Margo Garcia) writes:

<Deleted>

>1.  there are rapists and there are rapists.  There are those who rape in the
>    classic sense:  physically.  There are those who rape in a more subtle 
>    fashion, and while they have your conscent for the actual act, because of
>    their addictive need to control and manipulate, I consider this to be
>    rape as well ... rape of the spirit.  And this is how I classify sexual
>    addicts:  as rapist, of a differnt kind, but nonetheless, rapist.

Who needs to control and manipulate?  Some of us just need to be LOVED, and
have a hard time finding that love.

>2.  many studies lend credence to the theory that most physical rapists
>    experienced dysfunctional childhoods, including in many cases, their
>    own rape.  Now, sexual addicts who act upon their addiction must also
>    experience somehting similar to the above.  Or, at the very least, they
>    didn't get what they needed in the ultimate sense as a child and so 
>    their sexuality has been arrested, or scewed into the addiction.

The childhood is to blame?  I guess I just subscribe to a different school of
thought on this point, because I disagree...

>3.  Like physical rape, victimizing others through sexual addiction is rooted
>    in the concepts of control and sometimes emotional violence.

Who's trying to victimize?  I know that by finding someone else, I can't make
myself whole, but that's what my system tells me to try to do anyways...

>4.  in the case of a male sexual addict, misogyny is also implicated.  In the
>    case of addicts of both genders, low self-esteem or a dysfunctional self-
>    image of anyother kind is also inplicated.

I disagree on the misogyny part, since I have an even harder time with that!

>5.  I'm not sure if chemistry comes into play here:  if it's purely a psycho-
>    logical dysfuntion that is solely rooted in experience, or if there could
>    also be chemical imbalances that may contribute to the addiction and
>    subsequent behaviour.  And I'm not sure if there are any medical/chemical
>    means of controlling this behaviour. 

Got me, but my Psych has me on Imipramine to controll my depressions and help
with A.D.D.

>As I mentioned, I am not a psychologist, but have a habit of observation. 
>And through my own therapy, I have learnt a few things regarding my own
>psychology.  I am interested in opening up a discussion on this topic so as
>to provide more insight not only for myself,  but for anyone else who might
>be a recovering victim of a sexual addict.   Again the above the above 5
>statements  are nothing more than thoughts, and are more than open to
>discussion/criticism.

Nor am I a psych, but I too have a habit of observation...

The more that I think about it, the more I realize that you were refering to
something besides what I am dealing with.  But I'm going to let this post go
out to the world anyways, since perhaps there is a chance someone out there
might have an idea that might help me cope...

Krikket               ! krikket@meltdown.chi.il.us ! USnail:3 Danada Square E.
a.k.a Doug Krick      ! Team Star Charter Member   !        Suite 246
Data ph# 708/665-9732 ! #include<std.disclaimers>  !        Wheaton, Il 60187
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  Just another commentary on the sad state of affairs on our nation today.
Newsgroups: alt.sexual.abuse.recovery