From: frf@xocolatl.com (Rob Faulds)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.monty-python
Subject: and yet more masons
Date: 12 Nov 92 20:24:17 GMT
Reply-To: frf@xocolatl.com
Organization: Amethyst Systems, Fremont, CA


> 
> 		APPLICATION FORM
> 
> 1) E-MAIL NAME   
                  frf
> 2) REAL NAME     
                  Robert Faulds
> 3) ADDRESS    
                  Currently in transit
> 4) TELEPHONE NUMBER   
                  (510) 226-8219
> 5) DATE OF BIRTH    
                  June 1, 1966 
> 6) WHAT COURSE YOU ARE STUDYING?
                  The back 9 at Edgewood
> 7) DO YOU HAVE AN APRON?
                  Harumph
> 8) IF YES TO 7 - WHAT COLOUR IS IT?
                  Yes, I belive it is
> 9) CAN YOU CHANT IN A SILLY HIGH PITCHED WHINE?
                  How else could I get a date?
> 10) DO YOU HAVE A SILLY WALK?
                  Harumph
> 11) IF YES TO 10 - PLEASE DESCRIBE YOUR SILLY WALK.
                  Sort of a knee around knee, kind a bent at the ankle, 
		  looking back over your right shoulder walk,  Maybe.
> 12) DO YOU HAVE ANY POSITION OF POWER?
                  Peeking through the hedges.
> 13) BANK BLANCE?
  		  With only a slight list.               
> 14) HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO THE GRILLO SNACK BAR IN PAIGNTON?
                 Certainly not
> 15) IF YES TO 14 - WHAT DID YOU EAT THERE?
		  Small coctail pickles
> 16) ARE YOU A VIRGIN? (HONEST AWNSER PLEASE!)
                 Certainly not, nor do I resemble any other salad dressing
> 17) IF NO TO 16 - WHERE, WHEN AND WITH WHOM?
                 Oh, now I see what you meant, how embarrassing, what could
		 have come over me, I've never been so put off in all my life
		 and further more, EAT PEZ!
> 18) DO ANY OF THE FOLLOWING WORDS EMBARESS YOU? 
> 	(PLEASE NUMBER IN ORDER OF EMBARESSMENT)
> 	
> 	(A) THROBING
> 	(B) NAUGHTY BITS
> 	(C) THRUSTING
> 	(D) WANKLE ROTARY ENGINE
> 	(E) EXTENDED
> 	(F) F'TANG F'TANG OLE BISCUIT BARREL
> 	(G) SEMPRENI
	 	 Ahhh, I think not. 

> 19) WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURATE 1970,s BBC TV COMEDY SHOW STARING JOHN CLEESE,
> 	MICHAEL PALIN, ERIC IDLE, TERRY JONES, TERRY GILLIAM AND GRAHAM
> 	CHAPMAN?
                 This week in rerview.
> 20) YOUR FANTASY?
		 Oh, thank you very much, I've been expecting that.
> 21) WHAT FORM OF EXECUTION WOULD YOU PREFER?
                 Concise.
> 22) WHAT ARE YOUR MUSICAL TASTES?
                 Extreme
> 23) COLOUR AND NUMBER OF EYES
                 Brown, Number 1 and number 2
> 24) HEIGHT
                 and Ashbury
> 25) WEIGHT
                 and yee shall receive
> 26) WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY?
                 A new apron!
> 27) ARE YOU - SINGLE/MARRIED/DIVORCED?
                 Engaged to be married and then divorced.
> 28) WHICH BRAND OF VAGINAL DEODRANT DO YOU BUY?
                 The good smelling stuff.
> 29) WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURATE CHOCOLATE?
         	 Thank you very much, may I have another?
> 30) WOULD YOU LIKE INFORMATION ON A FULLY COMPREHENSIVE MOTOR INSURENCE POLICY
> 	WITH A FREE NUDE LADY ? (OR THIRD PARTY WITH HER BRA ON)
                 I believe I am covered at present, but send her over for a 
		 test drive. 
> 31) CAN YOU SPEAK HUNGARIAN?
                 Why, do you have one handy? 
> 32) DO YOU WANT TO COME BACK TO MY PLACE BOUNCY BOUNCY?
                 Say NO more, nudge nudge
> 33) IF I SAID YOU HAD A BEUTIFULL BODY WOULD YOU HOLD IT AGAINST ME?
                 No, but I know a chap who will.
> 34) WHAT POLITICAL PARTY DO YOU SUPPORT? (IF ANY)
                 The albatross party
> 35) WHY ARE YOU STILL READING THIS CRAP?
Newsgroups: alt.fan.monty-python