HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: chu@hanauma.jpl.nasa.gov (Eugene Chu)
Subject: Re: Love notes
Organization: Image Analysis Systems Group, JPL
Date: Thu, 16 Apr 1992 06:23:05 GMT

In article <5294@pdxgate.UUCP> masoodj@eecs.cs.pdx.edu (Javed Masood) writes:
>
>The most wonderful of all things in life,
>I believe, is the discovery of another
>human being with whom one's relationship has 
>a glowing depth, beauty, and joy as the
>years increases.
>This inner progressiveness of love 
>between two human beings
>is a most marvelous thing,
>it cannot be found by looking for it or
>by passionately wishing for it.
>It is a sort of divine accident.
>
>			        Sir Hugh Walpole
>
>The best and most beautiful
>things in the world
>cannott be seen or even touched.
>They must be felt with the heart.
>
>     				Helen Keler

"Love is Hell"		- Matt Groening

eyc
From: aatresa@lims02.lerc.nasa.gov (Teresa Kline)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Ed and Teresa (Carp ????)
Keywords: Let's mind our own business
Date: 15 Apr 92 23:07:00 GMT
Article-I.D.: lims02.15APR199218072281
Organization: Yeah, *right* !
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41

In article <kup574INN9gr@jethro.Corp.Sun.COM>, erc@pogo.Corp.Sun.COM (Ed Carp) writes...
>In article <15APR199208022961@lims01.lerc.nasa.gov> aatresa@lims01.lerc.nasa.gov (Teresa Kline) writes:
>>In article <1992Apr14.024027.10332@usho93.hou281.chevron.com>, hrtcu@usho52.hou281.chevron.com (R.T.Cutler) writes...
>>>For GOD's sake, consumate this.  DO IT!!!!  And then maybe all of
>>>us can get some sleep.
> 
>>Oh....are we keeping you up?  :)
> 
>Probably all the noise we're making <evil grin> :)

Speak for yourself...all that *noise*!  :)

-- Teresa

		Life -- just for the FUN of it!!!!
Newsgroups: alt.romance,alt.romance.chat
From: cowpatti@netcom.com (Patricia Mae Anthony)
Subject: Re: Is this a common thing?
Date: Mon, 13 Apr 92 18:03:53 GMT
Organization: Netcom - Online Communication Services  (408 241-9760 guest) 

In article <92104.092434RJD118@psuvm.psu.edu> <RJD118@psuvm.psu.edu> writes:
>Here's the question: "If, in the possible occurance of an 'oops', [as in
>unwanted/unexpected pregnancy] what would happen to 'us'? Would you share
>the financial burden, or what?"
>
>Ladies, is this a common worry?
>Guys, do you feel the way I do, or the other way around?
>I just want some answers....

Sounds to me like there MIGHT be a fear of abandonment somewhere that
needs more exploring.  I don't think pregnancy is the primary
issue...just the handle to pull something else out for exploration.

CowPatti
-- 

@>-`,-->  @>-`,-->  @>-`,-->  @>-`,-->  @>-`,-->  @>-`,-->  @>-`,--> @>-`,-->
          >_,<   Cuando te acuerdes de mi, hechate una copa a mi salud. 
          (oo)   Porque donde quiera que estes, vas a cabar llorando mares.
  ,-------(._.)  Porque no vas a negar, que me llevas muy adentro.
 / |     ||      Y aunque lo quieras a no, sigo siendo tu tormento.
*  ||W--'||      Que le vas a hacer, Corazon?  Que le vas a hacer, Corazon? 
   ~~    ~~      Si te estas muriendo por mi amor?  [Cuco Sanchez]
<--`,-<@  <--`,-<@  <--`,-<@  <--`,-<@  <--`, <@  <--`,-<@  <--`,-<@  <--`,-<@
From: chrisc@pro-nbs.cts.com (Chris Carstens)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Personal Ads
Date: 6 Apr 92 15:12:51 GMT
Article-I.D.: pro-nbs.d629943
Organization: ProLine [pro-nbs] San Diego (Tierrasanta), CA.  (619) 571-0152

:I'm a psychologist working on a book for single adults who are looking for
:long term relationships.  Recently I posted a request for ideas for fun
:things adults can do on "first dates" and was delighted by the response.
:I'd like to ask another question.
:
:How are the personal ads working?  Did you ever meet anybody really
special
:through the personals?  Good experiences?  Dreadful experiences?
:
:Does anybody know of a successful marriage that began through the
:personals?
:
:Please Email your responses.  I'll personally acknowledge each.  Thanks in
:advance.  Chris Carstens, Ph.D.
----
ProLine:  chrisc@pro-nbs
Internet: chrisc@pro-nbs.cts.com
UUCP:     ryptyde!pro-nbs!chrisc
Xref: sparky alt.romance:7061 soc.singles:11215 soc.couples:2109
From: sms@cbnewsf.cb.att.com (steven.m.stein)
Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.singles,soc.couples
Subject: Re: Sanctity of relationships
Date: 14 Apr 92 16:43:04 GMT
Distribution: usa
Organization: AT&T

In article <1992Apr13.014644.14378@rice.edu> rbook@flammulated.owlnet.rice.edu (Robert Aaron Book) writes:
>In article <1992Apr7.005929.11543@vax5.cit.cornell.edu>, rnjx@vax5.cit.cornell.edu writes:

>In addition to the ethical issue, there is also the practical issue:  if the
>object of your "wooing" is responsive, then obviously he/she isn't very 
>committed to his/her present relationship, and probably won't be committed
>to the relationship with you, either.  Thus, he/she will probably be wooed 
>away from you by someone else, so what's the point?
>
>--Robert Book
>  rbook@rice.edu

I don't necessarily agree with this.  Even though s/he might not be
compatible with one individual, does not necessarily mean that s/he
would not be compatible with all other individuals.  We don't always
know in advance that a relationship is not going to work until we are
already involved in the relationship.

						StEvE
Newsgroups: alt.romance,alt.romance.chat
From: bored bitch <lwagers@silver.ucs.indiana.edu>
Subject: Re: End of Story (Was Re: OVER EXCITED *8)  )
Organization: What? Me organized?
Date: Wed, 8 Apr 1992 13:52:53 -0500

>In article <1992Apr03.045456.18065@yuma.acns.colostate.edu> andrew@lamar.ColoState.EDU (Andrew Boardman) writes:
>	*cough* Well, I guess it's my turn. After a traumatic 5.5 months
>	(gosh, only 5 months?? :) I've finally made it.
>>
>		-- skye, formerly skye@extro.ucc.su.oz.au,
>		now of aboard@statsun.stat.colostate.edu. Please
>		do not reply to the email address shown in the
>		article.

         ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

I just wanted to say I don't know the story behind this, but it is VERY 
heartening to hear of Aussies making it here......

Only 5 months? I have to wait 7.....

*grin*
and Welcome! may no one ask you about throwing shrimps on barbies 
    and if they do, tell 'em Ken doesn't like it when you do that.

love, lore
-- 
bitch - a cool babe who refuses to change her name
"Dammit, I hate trying to come up with these profound quotes."
                                   - bored bitch, right here, right now
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: puter@no1home.nashvil.ingr.com (Software Dude)
Subject: LOVE sucks. No question about it.
Organization: WHAT?
Date: Wed, 8 Apr 1992 15:37:12 GMT

 RJD118@psuvm.psu.edu writes:
>> LOVE sucks---unless you're in it.

Or your lips are sewed shut. ;^)
--
Puter		puter@no1home.nashvil.ingr.com		Go UofL Cardinals!
Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.singles,soc.couples
From: dave@bradley.bradley.edu (David Vessell)
Subject: Re: Sanctity of relationships
Organization: Bradley University
Distribution: world,soc
Date: Wed, 8 Apr 92 03:25:42 GMT

rnjx@vax5.cit.cornell.edu writes:

>The question is this.  Is it ever morally and/or ethically O.K. to actively
>try to woo one member of an existing relationship from that relationship so
>that you may start one with her/him?  Under what circumstances?  How about
>pursuing someone who's engaged?  Where do you all draw the line?  If it isn't
>O.K., would you still do it anyway?

Under most circumstances, I see no problem whatsoever with it.  If their
relationship is strong, then your efforts won't amount to a hill of beans
anyway.  If your actions do break up the relationship, then it probably
wasn't very strong to begin with.  Of course, in order to make it totally
ethical, you have to accept the possibility that the reverse might happen
to you.  You can't have it both ways.

My only exception to this non-rule is if I know the other guy.  If we're
friends, then I probably would not take an active role, but simply offer
myself as an alternative once the relationship has weakened adequately.  If
we're extremely close friends, I might even consider not pursuing her at
all if they break up.

But on the whole, I live by the maxim "All's fair in love and war."
-- 
=========*davE*.....making the world safe for intelligent dance music.=========
As you're cleaning the orange carpet, you will hear a voice that says, "Fetch 
my cigarettes."  Another voice will say, "THEY'RE ON TOP OF THE REFRIGERATOR."
--(David Vessell)--(Bradley University Computing Services)-(dave@bradley.edu)--
Organization: Penn State University
Date: Thursday, 9 Apr 1992 12:36:06 EDT
From: <RJD118@psuvm.psu.edu>
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Getting friends with your SO

Being friends with your ex is, in theory, a great idea. I mean, you have
shared an awful lot...I never understood how people could be "in love" one day,
have an argument, then hate each other for the rest of their lives.
However, (The key word of a counterexample!!)
I have a bit of difficulty in this theory being put into practice.
Not for myself...I am good friends with all of my ex's.
But I have recently entered into a new relationship...and the other day
her old boyfriend showed up. I knew who he was...I had met him a few times
while Jenn was still seeing him and she and I were "Just Friends". I have
nothing against the guy...but I was in an uncomfortable situation.
She went over to talk to him...they parted on amicable terms, so she didn't
want to snub him. I took a walk....no need for me to be hovering over them.
Ai, how hard that was on me...when he left, she came to talk to me about it.
I just asked for some time to myself. _I_ needed to clear the system of the
grungies I was feeling. Took me twenty minutes of soul-rending self-
examination. Everything is good now, but it's not the two who were involved
who take the biggest strain in a case like this....it's the new SO's, who
are just too damn vulnerable sometimes....
Enough, I ramble.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
I_________________________I         Redneck!    The Official Lumberjack
I\***********************/I                     and Woodgatherer of the
                                                          RFA
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: Pamela Kay <szafrans@copper.ucs.indiana.edu>
Subject: Re: Romantic music list
Organization: Indiana University
Date: Wed, 15 Apr 1992 20:40:45 -0500

{stuff deleted about Michael Hedges and his music being so romantic
for my husband and me}

> Are you speaking of the song on the Taproot album, called "I Will Carry
>On?"  (Unsure as to the song title as I am at work.)  It's the last song on
>the disk.

The album is Michael Hedges "Watching My Life Go By".  It is not
necessarily the "most" romantic lyrics for many of the songs, just
that music in combination with his wonderful voice, really was
very "mood-setting" for us.  Many was the night, that my husband and
I drifted off (holding hands :) together with Michael in the background.
Our son seems to enjoy it still today...a little link to his beginnings :)

*sigh*....

Pam
Xref: sparky alt.romance:6872 soc.singles:10871 soc.couples:2015
From: jclark@sdcc3.ucsd.edu (John Clark)
Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.singles,soc.couples
Subject: Re: Sanctity of relationships
Date: 10 Apr 92 05:51:51 GMT
Followup-To: alt.romance
Distribution: usa
Organization: University of California, San Diego

In article <1992Apr9.153217.14011@cbnewse.cb.att.com> hjanssen@cbnewse.cb.att.com (hank janssen) writes:
+
+This is getting fun.
+I guess you also don't hold Hitler responsible for  the  second  world
+war. Just imagine him saying, I am not responsible for anybody's elses
+actions. Only my own.

No, I hold the Vienna Art Academy totally responsible for A. Hitler.
If they had just accepted another hack artist, the world would have
been without A. Hitler.

But you presuppose that the events after the end of WWI could have
really been altered by A. Hitler' absence. There would have been
another. The presence of Germany as a force in Europe woud not have
changed Japannese expansion, U.S. expansion, British Expansion in Asia,
culminating in a war in the Pacific.

The point of 'you do your thing, I'll do mine, etc..' is that it is
a local effect, not a global effect. To persuade others that 'my
thing is the thing to do, for everyone with a detriment some other
group' is the problem with A. Hitlers of the world and why one should
be ever vigilant on abuses of power.

Or, almost any localized statement on live and let live can be
extrapolated to some absurd point does not mean the local statement
is 'wrong' but that it is just that, local.

-- 

John Clark
jclark@ucsd.edu
Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.couples,soc.singles
From: jjd1@cbnewsg.cb.att.com (james.j.dutton)
Subject: Re: lying to oneself (was Re: Sanctity of relationships)
Organization: AT&T
Distribution: na
Date: Thu, 9 Apr 1992 18:00:49 GMT

In article <1992Apr9.101644.5254@hemlock.cray.com> robd@cray.com (Robert Derrick) writes:
>fred says:
>: I write:
>: >	remember, you can lie to me, to her, to him, to everyone,
>: >	but you can't lie to yourself.
>: 
>: Not true. People lie to themselves all the time. And they believe their lies.
>
>Then I wish it were true for me.  Or perhaps we have a misunderstanding
>about what it means to "lie to oneself".  I can't do it.  I can be
>confused.  I can and often do, misunderstand.  But if I try to lie to
>myself, it's a no go.  I know that I am lying, and there just is no
>way I can convince myself of a lie that I already know is a lie.
>
>I agree with you that people "lie to themselves all the time", but I
>don't think they are very successful at believing it.  Though it
>doesn't stop 'em from trying.
>
>I would say, if feel a little guilty about something you convinced
>yourself was a good idea, then you lied to yourself, and deep down,
>you know it.  'course, I could be wrong...
>
>rob
 
That's a bold faced lie.


Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.singles,soc.couples
From: tcl@csi.UOttawa.CA (Tim Lethbridge)
Subject: Re: Sanctity of relationships
Organization: CSI Dept., University of Ottawa
Distribution: world,soc
Date: Tue, 7 Apr 92 21:45:08 GMT

In article <75nG027bc0Nq00@amdahl.uts.amdahl.com>, jsp@uts.amdahl.com (James Preston) writes:
|> rnjx@vax5.cit.cornell.edu writes:
|> 
|> }The question is this.  Is it ever morally and/or ethically O.K. to actively
|> }try to woo one member of an existing relationship
...
|> No.  Unequivocally it is never, ever ok.
...

OK, let's take this one step further. Is one morally bound
to *ask* a potential SO whether they are available, or is the
onus on him/her to tell you if he/she is *not* available?

Personally, I think the latter. Which then begs a further question:
Say you are 'wooing' someone and suddenly find out that she/he is
involved. Do you just drop him/her like a hot potato for moral
reasons? Such behavior seems hurtful to me.

In my opinion the main things that should stop someone from 'wooing'
someone else are 1) the potential SO has said *no*, or 2) the potential
SO is *married*. Just being in a relationship is not enough.

Does that make me a jerk? I think not. This is the way the real
world works, and has worked since time immemorial.

I will admit that my actions speak differently, I never date anyone
until I am *really* sure they are not involved, and have dropped women
when I found out they were involved. But this is not for moral
reasons. I am a chicken! (a.k.a nice-guy-attempting-to-reform)

[Incidentally, My father wooed my mother away from her former
boyfriend -- maybe I have a conflict-of-interest in this moral
issue :-) ]

-- 
Timothy C. Lethbridge             tcl@csi.uottawa.ca
(613) 564-8155                   FAX: (613) 564-9486
Department of Computer Science, University of Ottawa
150 Louis Pasteur,    Ottawa,    Canada      K1N 6N5
From: erc@pogo.Corp.Sun.COM (Ed Carp)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: And Now for Something Apartly Similar...(kiss!)
Keywords: READ,KILL,READ,WALK THE DOG,READ,GRIT THY TEETH,READ...
Date: 13 Apr 92 21:47:32 GMT
Distribution: usa
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Mt. View, Ca.
NNTP-Posting-Host: pogo.corp.sun.com

In article <13APR199217113464@lims01.lerc.nasa.gov> aatresa@lims01.lerc.nasa.gov (Teresa Kline) writes:
>In article <kuc8q2INNlka@jethro.Corp.Sun.COM>, erc@pogo.Corp.Sun.COM (Ed Carp) writes...

>>That's right ... and poison is a lady's weapon...

>>Just thought you ought to know :)

>*You* might do well to keep that in mind.  :)

Uh-oh...
--
Ed Carp                                      415/336-0797 (work)

++ UNIX  SysAdmin, Systems  Programming  Services,  Utilities ++
++ and Programmer Productivity Tools                          ++
From: hjanssen@cbnewse.cb.att.com (hank janssen)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: a question (AN ANSWER, not even a smart ass one)(yeah right!)
Date: 8 Apr 92 16:35:39 GMT
Organization: AT&T

From article <7APR199212474222@lims01.lerc.nasa.gov>, by afdenis@lims01.lerc.nasa.gov (Stephen Dennison):
> In article <1992Apr7.110748.1@runt.appstate.edu>, grs01153@runt.appstate.edu writes...
>>Stephen, *the* smart ass indeed!

AGAIN A LOT DELETED.
> 
>>Secondly, as though you really care, 
> 
> So, my joking style masked the serious parts of my response ?  I actually 
> answered your question as succinctly as I could.  Apply the definition I 
> gave you of cheating to *any* circumstance, and you will find that it holds 
> up well.  Hank didn't seem to find my style offensive or obtruse, perhaps 
> we ought to filter our communication through *his* posts to prevent future 
> misunderstandings.
> 

Well  actually, i smiled through the whole conversation.  (Not the one
i wrote, i tried (lets emphasize *tried*) to be honest and write  down
what i feel  about  cheating  (Didn't  to  to  good  a  job  about  it
unfortunatly. :-()




-- 
---------------------------------------------------+-------------------
The full moon shines bright.			   |    Hank Janssen
      I gaze long at its beauty,		   | 	    (CPU)
           I am overwhelmed.			   |
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: tga20201@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu (The Traveller)
Subject: Re: LOVE sucks. No question about it.
Keywords: Feelings
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana
Date: Wed, 8 Apr 1992 15:11:14 GMT

No, love doesn't suck, but if you're lucky, he/she does.  ;->

(Just a little humor in an ordinarily depressing thread.)

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This is a *REAL SIG*, a device that indicates that the user is a *REAL MAN*,
and not one of those wimps with wimpy .sigs
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: george@smsc.sony.com (George Maestri)
Subject: Re: Remaining friends with an ex SO.
Organization: Sony Microsystems Corp, San Jose, CA
Date: Tue, 7 Apr 92 00:11:40 GMT

>hello all,
>
>        i have been involved with a special person for the last four
>years and our relationship has changed. we have chosen to take different
>paths in life and i think we are doing the right thing ( but i'm not totally
>sure )
>        i met Cathy in university and had the best four years in my
>life (so far ). at first, the relationship  was totally physical, but it has
>grown to something much more. she has become one of my best friends and i hate
>to lose the friendship just because we are no longer lovers. we have talked
>and have both decided to remain friends.
>
>        i hope it works, but i can see problems in the future ( i.e. a new SO
>who does not like the fact that we were once lovers ) and i would like to hear
>from people who have had experiences like this, the problems they encountered
>and the way they handled them. plus any other hints that may be helpful.
>
>thanx,
>
>stef

Well, my theory is if you had a good strong relationship, then
remaining friends should be easy.  If you can't be friends, then
it must not have been a very good relationship to begin with.
Remaining friends just takes a little bit of time and *lots* 
of understanding (no egos or jealousy - ok ?).

From my experience, I know that it can work out.  My ex-wife and I
still share a very close friendship.  It wasn't always that way,
especially right after the divorce. We promised, however, to
remain friends because of our daughter. But after the first year
or so (we've been divorced 5 years), the pain of the separation
faded, and the frienship remainded.  It is now stronger than ever. 
Renee is one of the best friends I'll ever have.

It's great to have a friend who knows me as well as she does, and 
who I can be totally honest with.  Renee will always give it to me 
straight when it comes to personal advice (and vice-versa).

As for potential jealousy with a new SO, that can be a problem, 
one that we've both encountered.  Usually, the SO that refuses
to understand will probably not last anyways, because they refuse
to accept you as you are, undermining the relationship.  Renee's new
husband and I are great friends (probably 'cuz we're so much alike).  
We've gotten along since day one, without question.  I'm really happy 
they finally got married.  (I was best man at the wedding).  

My frienship with Renee (and Ralph) has also helped our daughter cope
with the divorce and Renee's remarriage.  She's happy and well adjusted.

So, it can work, just value the frienship for what it is, be honest,
and it should take care of itself.

George.
From: aatresa@lims02.lerc.nasa.gov (Teresa Kline)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: A Question for Females
Date: 15 Apr 92 23:26:00 GMT
Article-I.D.: lims02.15APR199218264309
Organization: Yeah, *right* !
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41

In article <scott.703371892@phylo>, scott@phylo.life.uiuc.edu (Scott Howard) writes...
><32DPO6T@CMUVM.CSV.CMICH.EDU> writes:
> 
>>If you do
>>go out with someone who you were first friends with, and you break up for some
>>stupid reason, you're out of a relationship and a friendship.
> 
>Wait, you mean you can't be friends with someone you sleep with?
>I can't imagine doing something that intimate with someone I didn't
>have a good friendship with.
> 

I think we're talking about someone with whom you've been friends for a 
time.  There is a real (and true) fear that if the more intimate boyfriend/
girlfriend relationship breaks up, the friendship that preceded it will 
also be lost.
It's hard to go back to liking someone when you loved them.  Not to mention 
the hurt and sometimes angry feelings that usually occur during the breakup 
of a romantic relationship.

-- Teresa

		Life -- just for the FUN of it!!!!
Newsgroups: alt.romance