From: masuda@fcs280b.ncifcrf.gov (Michiaki Masuda)
Subject: Re: Not a Myth at All
Organization: Frederick Cancer Research and Development Center
Date: Mon, 21 Dec 1992 22:38:03 GMT

In article <33964@twics.co.jp> dcroz@twics.co.jp writes:

>     The bottom line, me freund, is that you need to spend a few years inside
>Japan but outside a tame g**j*n bubble.  What Mr. Brueckner reports is quite
>accurate.  
> 
>     Part of the reason is that it is an article of faith in the religion of
>Japanism that filthy nig. . .err, I mean, that g**j*n can't learn to speak
>Japanese.

     This is nothing "religious". This is a perception based on experiences.
As there are many gaijin who cannot speak Japanese well, we assume that
gaijin cannot speak Japanese well. I've met many Americans and Europeans
who are under the strong impression that Japanese cannot speak English well.

>  When faced with a Japanese-speaking g**j*n, reactions may include
>shock, disbelief, revulsion, and anger,

   You forgot to inculde a friendly smile and a compliment.

> but always include cognitive dissonance
>produced by reality's refusal to conform to their beliefs.

   I've never met anyone who can describe a simple word, "surprise", in a
sophisticated way like this.

>  The *very common*
>refusal to converse in Japanese is an attempt to restore order in the universe
>through denial, and an attempt to reassert superiority:  "I'm smart enough to
>learn your language but you're not smart enough to learn mine, so we'll have to
>converse in English:  Can. . .hepping. . .you. . .somesing?"

   Then, are you trying to assert that you are smart enough to master our
language, but Japanese are inferior and the best thing we could say is, 
"hepping"?

>     "Ehh, to. . .hamu sando to kohii wo kudasai."
>     "Hamu sando to kohii wo kudasai."
>     "Ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh?  Can. . .hepping. . .you. . ."
>     Ketou customer points to menu:  "Koko de 'hamu sando' ga kaiteiru, neh? 
>          Nanka mimi ga warui kai?"
>     Master-race waiter mimics sudden comprehension.  "Ahh.  Hamu sando.  Ando,
>          dorinkku somesing?

    So, finally you got "hamu sando" (and possibly something to dorinkku).
Then, your point is......?

>     I used to smoke tobacco.
        ^^^^^^^
[The story of a Kiosk obasan who didn't know how to deal with a gaijin 
customer deleted.]

      And you've never been able to buy "Short Peace" since then? Is that
why you stopped smoking? Good for your health, though.

>     And this is the rule, not the exception.  The Japanese *do not want* ketou
>speaking Japanese.

      No, the Kiosk obasan didn't want you to speak English, French, German,
whatever. The problem might be that she thought that you were one of those
gaijins who cannot speak Japanese.

[The lesson on how to insult a Japanese who doesn't speak Japanese to you 
deleted.]

>     At this point, if you're lucky, the bigot will hit you.

     That's right. You are lucky enough not to be shot. We don't carry a
gun in Japan.

>  At the very least
>he'll stop pretending he doesn't understand you, you'll have an open enemy
>instead of a secret enemy, and you'll have ruined his day as thoroughly as he's
>ruined yours.

    "He"? "His"? Are you such a coward that can fight only with a man? B-)
 
>  If you're really hacked off, you might try,
> 
>     "Tsugi Nihon wa sensou wo okosu toki, senjou de mata aou, naa?"  And a big
>smile.  But don't take your eyes off him.

     And you might see him on the same side of the frontline.

>     (Sorry if any of the bad language above is grammatically incorrect or
>unnatural.

   You don't have to be sorry. We don't expect gaijin to be so good at
Japanese anyway. B-)

>  It's virtually impossible to get a Japanese to instruct you in the
>kind of language you *really need* on a day-to-day basis.)

   How much have you spent to learn Japanese? And how? A Japanese class at
school? Private lesson? Or what? 
   You are not expecting that Japanese are obliged to sacrifice his/her time
and to give you a free Japanese lesson, are you?

--Michiaki