From: sieh@panix.com (Lui Sieh)
Subject: Re: Breaking stereotypes: what's the point? (was Re: Asian males aren't...)
Date: Sun, 13 Dec 1992 06:07:35 GMT
Distribution: na
Organization: PANIX Public Access Unix & Internet, NYC

In article <1992Dec8.083218.23019@oakhill.sps.mot.com> jpak@manute.sps.mot.com
>writes:
>In article <1992Dec8.021023.4992@panix.com> sieh@panix.com (Lui Sieh) writes:
>[my dissatisfaction with Jim's answer to disproving stereotypes deleted]
>You know what?  Neither do I.  On the other hand, I can only stomach so much
>behavior modification on my end just for the sake of trying to remove an
>offensive stereotype.
>
>>times so...).  "Just be ourselves".  Well, the point I raised in a previous
>>article in reply to Alan's was, what if being ourselves would be to reinforce
>>those images and perceptions that we're trying to disavow?
>
>Then I guess it's up to each individual to decide what's more important to
>him/her, acting differently to try to dispel stereotypes held by basically
>ignorant people, or just be yourself and let the chips fall where they may.
>Probably most people fall somewhere in-between.
>
>>This is what I call the "Nightmare".
>
>"Nightmare"??  This is being kind of overdramatic, isn't it?

Actually, I think calling it the "Nightmare" sort of hits it on the head.
Because so many Asian American men labor under debilitating stereotypes 
of their self identity and self worth that many of us try to dispel or
disavow those preceptions about who we are.  Many of us take great pains
to let it be known that "we" are *not* like that.  I don't ever remember
anyone of my Asian American male friends/acquaintances grudgingly admit
that there is any truth whatsoever in those stereotypes.  

The question I'm submitting is that well, what if there is a lot of truth
in them *as they pertain to *me* (or to the individual questioning)?  It
kind of feels like a punch in the gut and it's a start of very painful
introspection that many people shy away.

I agree with you that any form of behavior alterations is a very tricky
issue.  People have various methods of dealing with negativity and as far
as I'm concerned, each method is as "good" as another so long as it works
for the individual.  Personally, I feel that "being yourself and letting 
the chips fall where they may" is a healthy attitude.  I've explained it
to people as a form of "who the cares what other people think?  You're
more important and you know yourself better than anyone else.  Why let
them ruin your life?  Screw 'em."  

>>Unfortunately, this is a something that I don't think is very possible. Sure,
>>inital impressions are poor indicators of a person's character but that's how
>>things work.  That is why when I meet someone I don't know anything about I
>>try to approach the person with a "tabula rasa".  Make no assumptions what-so
>>-ever.  It works well for me.
>
>Then perhaps the work on our part should go into making more people open-
>minded in the way they view strangers (the way you are) rather than trying 
>to modify behaviors on our part.

A good question in how should we approach the reasons and causes for racist 
thinking and behavior.  What are the ways people can further more tolerance,
and acceptance in others?  One area to start would be to examine what are
the reasons for people to be intolerant and racist in the first place?  I
believe that examining the overall question from this perspective first,
will reveal not only the causes for America's societal ills but it will
reveal the possible solutions to it.  It's a complex issue that involves
many aspects such as how do we view human nature, the nature of society.
This will involve what are the dynamics in society, what role does each 
dynamic play, how important is each relative to another.  Where do we envision
society 10, 20, or 30 years from now.  What is our notion of the "ideal"
American societ??     

>>That underlying question still remains, "What if being ourselves only 
>>strengthens those very impressions we hate?"
>
>Then I think it comes down again to what's more important, being true to
>yourself, or trying to make a better impression on somebody else.  I'll admit,
>I get as weak as anybody else and go the latter route on occasion.  But I try
>not to make a habit of it.

It's good to make an impression.  In fact it's very important in my book.
However, I don't believe that being true to yourself is mutually exclusive
from making a good impression (whatever that entails).  It is possible to
overcome bad impressions.  I'm curious what other Asian American men think 
when they see one of their compatriots "successful" (ie. they don't seem to be
affected by this debilitating stereotype that so many others are)?  Do they
feel that he's a "sellout" and disregard him as being "different"?  What
goes through the mind?  Or maybe those examples are so far and few between
for some men?



-- 
//Lui Sieh
Dum loquimur, fugerit invida Aetas: carpe diem, quam minimum postero.  
Horace, Odes, I.xi.7;	<-- "Why post to USENET?" -Brian O.  Indeed.
What about my opinions?   ====>>	/dev/null or sieh@panix.com
Newsgroups: soc.culture.asian.american,soc.culture.african.american,alt.politics.clinton