HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: cliftonr@netcom.com (Pope Clifton)
Subject: Re: Another naming contest
Organization: t.b, t.p.d, & a.d
X-Newsreader: Tin 1.1 PL5
Date: Tue, 10 Nov 1992 05:06:40 GMT

L. Stewart -- IS Office 1058 (lstewart@watserv1.uwaterloo.ca) wrote:
: In article <1992Nov8.042007.28701@kakwa.ucs.ualberta.ca> aaron@space.ualberta.ca writes:
: >It has recently come to the attention of some of us that while there are well-
: >defined terms for both newcomes to talk.bizarre("newbies")and long-time
: >residents(patrons?)of talk.bizarre("oldbies"), ...
: 
: I suggest `rim jockeys', `volcano food', or `suck weasels'.
: 
  I kind of like the idea of being a "rim jockey", or maybe "rim dweller."
Has connotations of both cave and volcano -- the newt newly emerged from 
the cave, teetering in the rim of the cave, the crater beckoning below,
the newt blinded by the unaccustomed sunlight.  Like the sexual connotations 
too.
  Sign me up for "rim dweller" -- or "rim jockey" -- or is there a waiting 
list?
  -- Clifton (flame bait again)

--
Home: cliftonr@netcom.com     +1 808 521 9073
Work: clifton_r@verifone.com  +1 808 625 3234
Pope of the Church of the Subgenius in Paradise
"Have a revelation, the first one's free/Soon to be addicted to eternity" - HMR
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: jfw@jfwhome.FUNHOUSE.COM (John F. Woods)
Subject: Re: Short, shameful confession
Organization: Misanthropes-R-Us
Date: Thu, 5 Nov 1992 02:16:02 GMT

In <Nov04.061835.29023@yuma.ACNS.ColoState.EDU> arsmith@lamar.ColoState.EDU (Alan Smith) writes:
>In article <1992Nov3.214129.5738@wixer.cactus.org> cb@wixer.cactus.org (Cyberspace Buddha) writes:
>>I voted recently.  possibly in a fashion you wouldn't like.
>>can something be done?  would it matter?
>VOTE THE WAY YOU SNARKING WANT TO.  Or even the way you want to normally.
>Do not EVER ask me my opinion of your ballot

I, however, am perfectly happy to offer my opinion of your ballot.

It would definitely look better in a light lavender, or possibly a pastel
forest green, perhaps with pale blue trim.  Also, you should remember to
mark neatly inside the circles instead of drawing squiggly little death's
heads in the margins.
From: rpwhite@ac13.cs.nps.navy.mil (rpwhite)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: family T1 ties
Date: 7 Nov 92 21:13:13 GMT
Organization: Monterey Bay Yacht Club, Monterey CA

ajd@oit.itd.umich.edu (Arthur Delano) writes:

>my brother has email and usenet access

>top that

My little brother has email and usenet access and .....

is a net.personality in alt.sex.bondage

rp -- call and raise
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: mlegare@wetware.com (The Steel General's Batsman)
Subject: Re:  Scorched Earth Party: Final Position Paper
Organization: Cappo Ferra 6
Date: Sat, 7 Nov 1992 03:35:08 GMT

grendel@canetoad.UUCP (Rage y Romance) writes:

] In article <1992Nov3.073034.11103@wetware.com> mlegare@wetware.com (BoBteCh) writes:
] >A Problem For The Scorched Earth Party:
] >
] >my lead pipe broke.
] >
] >pls. advise
] 
] Big, shiny, aluminum bat.
] 
] Big, shiny, aluminum bat.
] 
] Big, 
] shiny, 
] aluminum 
] bat.
] 
] Geez, how many times do I have to repeat myself? 
] --

What we have here is a difference in 
aesthetics
- both are a successful means to an end
- both are sufficient for the task at hand

BUT
i think maybe
you're limiting yourself
(as am i)
just a little.

therefore, a compromise

a 1974 Ford Futura.

The 1974 Ford Futura of Enlightenment.


let's see what the marketing people think..
From: jcarroll@ferris.cray.com (Jeff Carroll)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: i say kill bush
Date: 9 Nov 92 23:12:14 GMT
Organization: Cray Research, Inc.
Originator: jcarroll@ferris


Ken Johnson advocates a little jocularity in t.b:

>Come off it. What he said was:
>
>%  i want bush's head on a pike stuck in my front lawn.
>
>This is obviously just a vivid figure of speech and not a threat
>intended to be taken seriously, even by the humour impaired.  (cf.  `I
>want Margaret Thatcher's head on a platter', `Die, rat bastard!', etc. 
>etc.) Mark you, the first woman to demand a man's head on a platter
>actually received it. 

I observe without comment that Ken stopped far short of calling for the
impalement of *his* head of state, even in jest.
From: bhoughto@sedona.intel.com (Blair P. Houghton)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Gloat
Date: 6 Nov 92 18:48:14 GMT
Organization: Intel Corp., Chandler, Arizona
NNTP-Posting-Host: alfalfa.intel.com

In article <Bx9tuA.91o@jfwhome.FUNHOUSE.COM> jfw@jfwhome.FUNHOUSE.COM (John F. Woods) writes:
>Does anyone know if the Republican party platform had a plank about the
>misc.test newsgroup?  Does anyone have a good solid plank with which to
>brain *all* the fools who are posting this crap to talk.bizarre?

Yeah, but it makes Carasso look pretty lame, doesn't it?

				--Blair
				  "Vast, untapped resources
				   of untold wealth..."
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: gooley@netcom.com (Mark. Gooley)
Subject: Re: short shameful confession
Organization: Netcom - Online Communication Services  (408 241-9760 guest) 
Date: Wed, 11 Nov 1992 14:32:13 GMT

In article <1992Nov10.211332.7807@eos.arc.nasa.gov> phil@eos.arc.nasa.gov (Phil Stone) writes:
>I am still occasionally haunted by the song "You Need Us,"
>as sung by Ginger, Mary Ann and Mrs. Howell.
>
>		Phil (haven't killed yet, though)

So am I.  Fortunately there is only a ghost of a memory of it, so that
I won't be killing anybody for that reason.  However, that "the clean
in your mouth is Colgate" jingle occasionally throws me into a blind
rage.

Excuse me...

Mark.
gooley@netcom.com
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,alt.net.personalities
From: arsmith@lamar.ColoState.EDU (Alan Smith)
Subject: Re: My postbag this morning
Date: Wed, 11 Nov 1992 07:05:31 GMT
Organization: Colorado State University, Fort Collins, CO  80523

In article <10NOV199218461558@trentu.ca> jsautner@trentu.ca (Jeanette Sautner) writes:
>>This morning the new `C&A Compliments' Catalogue arrived in the post. 
>>The blue-eyed, blonde girl who models their underwear and stockings is
>>delicious.  She looks as if she is about eighteen.  
>
>I am really curious as to why you find a woman "delicious".  Are you a 
>cannibal?
>
Aren't you?  I thought everybody was.
(I'd post a call for recipies, but I'm afraid you talk.bizzaros would take
me seriously)

Big Al.  Although, there was this Teen Newburg I came across once...

Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: hamlet@ravel.udel.edu (Chris Adams)
Subject: brief boastful brag
Organization: University of Delaware
Date: Sat, 14 Nov 1992 05:39:03 GMT

I'm installing a reel-to-reel in my car.

(a nissan)
(glorified imported go-cart)
(has starter)

(thank you, nikolai)
(for favors granted)

and ulysses granted
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re:  Scorched Earth Party: Final Position Paper
From: rmk@rmkhome.UUCP (Rick Kelly)
Organization: The Man With Ten Cats
Date: Thu, 5 Nov 1992 13:09:20 GMT
Reply-To: rmk@rmkhome.UUCP (Rick Kelly)

In article <grendel.03s2@canetoad.UUCP> grendel@canetoad.UUCP (Rage y Romance) writes:
>In article <1992Nov3.073034.11103@wetware.com> mlegare@wetware.com (BoBteCh) writes:
>>A Problem For The Scorched Earth Party:
>>
>>my lead pipe broke.
>>
>>pls. advise
>
>Big, shiny, aluminum bat.
>
>Big, shiny, aluminum bat.
>
>Big, 
>shiny, 
>aluminum 
>bat.
>
>Geez, how many times do I have to repeat myself? 

But just imagine a a nice, highly-polished, stainless steel bat.

Much less upkeep than the aluminum bat.

-- 

Rick Kelly	rmk@rmkhome.UUCP	unixland!rmkhome!rmk	rmk@frog.UUCP
From: rkatos@hpunila.MSR.HP.COM (Ray Katos)
Date: Thu, 5 Nov 1992 20:03:27 GMT
Subject: Re: sleep compression algorithm
Organization: Hewlett Packard Sales, Naperville IL
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre

No, 4/0 is undefined, not infinity
From: jon@zeus.med.utah.edu (Jonathan Byrd)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: jack-o-lanterns
Date: 30 Oct 92 22:46:01 GMT
Distribution: usa
Organization: University of Utah

they were not the plump, round pumpkins we usually think of.  in fact,
it appeared as if the denizens of the old house has purposefully
chosen the most oblong, asymmetrical, oddly-shaped specimens they
could find.  the faces carved upon them were similarly strange: noses
and mouths were optional, and the number of eyes varied.  furthermore,
the insides of the pumpkins had not been scraped out.  orange tendrils
dripped from empty eye sockets, and the heads appeared to be vomiting
pulp and seeds on to the rotten wood of the front porch.  they must
have been carved weeks ago.  they were shriveled, and some had
collapsed completely, exposing the black mold that was the source of
the awful stench.
--
jonathan byrd
jon@apollo.med.utah.edu
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: silver@xrtll.uucp (Hi Ho Silver)
Subject: Re: ssc
Organization: What you won't find on my desk.
Date: Sat, 7 Nov 1992 02:21:15 GMT

Sayeth mlegare@wetware.com (BoBteCh):
$jhughes@techbook.com (John Hughes) writes:
$] In article <1992Oct27.181709.2555@sci34hub.sci.com> gary@sci34hub.sci.com (Gary Heston) writes:
$] >I know Kent's got me beat, but I haven't seen anyone posting within ten
$] >years of me...
$] >Bastille Day, 1955.
$] 7/8/48.
$] Kent is older but you're a kid.
$in case anyone is wondering, i'm 10 years old.

   I was asked on Wednesday night what I would like to be when I grow up.
But the party asking the question was an anal-retentive trombone player
who's even older than K*nt, so it doesn't count.

silver "come to think of it, the trombone player doesn't count, either"
-- 
|I know that sometimes my jaw clicks when I eat.  Void where prohibited.|
|Have you seen this boy?  Lust never sleeps.  I say hurl.  Honey, I'm   |
|home. _________________________________________________________________|
|_____/ silver@bokonon.UUCP    ...!{uunet|becker|xrtll}!bokonon!silver  |
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: mbur@nyx.cs.du.edu (MAC)
Subject: Re: Another naming contest
X-Disclaimer: Nyx is a public access Unix system run by the University
	of Denver for the Denver community.  The University has neither
	control over nor responsibility for the opinions of users.
Organization: Nyx, Public Access Unix at U. of Denver Math/CS dept.
Date: Tue, 10 Nov 92 22:50:08 GMT

In article <1992Nov10.213003.20221@tc.cornell.edu> mdw@theory.TC.Cornell.EDU (Matt Welsh) writes:
>In article <1dp93hINNmhc@agate.berkeley.edu> curtis@cs.berkeley.edu (Curtis Yarvin) writes:
>>In article <BxIHEH.1p5@tegra.com> vail@tegra.com (Johnathan Vail) writes:
>>
>>Now, just a second here.  Mbur is definitely VOLCANO FODDER, and I
>>thoroughly encourage instructing Welsh to SUCK WEASEL, even if I
>>rather doubt compliance will be forthcoming, 
>
>You've got it all wrong. Mike's WEASEL FODDER and I'm currently sucking
>on a volcano.
>
>mdw
>
Did it promise not to erupt in your mouth?

M - The check is in the mail.
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: pfinerty@nyx.cs.du.edu (big daddy hate box)
Subject: still going
Organization: Nyx, Public Access Unix @ U. of Denver Math/CS dept.
Date: Fri, 13 Nov 92 02:03:42 GMT

i met with the secret service agent today. i don't know if i will be
charged or not. he has to talk witht the attorney general tomorrow. there
are 805 articles for me to read. i might just hit 'c' or expand my
killfile. later
		pat
--
	     PJF--->BIOCHEM GRAD. STUDENT--U of UTAH oh yeah 
               "i am such a stupid,ignorant son of a bitch.
                           please kill me now."
						          "React with this!"
From: kludge@grissom.larc.nasa.gov (Scott Dorsey)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Have you lamented a Ford lately?
Date: 12 Nov 1992 19:00:30 GMT
Organization: NASA Langley Research Center and Reptile Farm
NNTP-Posting-Host: grissom.larc.nasa.gov

In article <9211111348.01@rmkhome.UUCP> rmk@rmkhome.UUCP (Rick Kelly) writes:
>In article <1dpkekINNkf9@rave.larc.nasa.gov> kludge@grissom.larc.nasa.gov (Scott Dorsey) writes:
>>>been most unimpressed.  The first, the thankfully discontinued SL-PJ11,
>>>[stuff deleted]
>>>It's the most frustrated I've been since I owned a Ford Escort.
>>
>>Hey, the Escort gets bad press, but it's not all that awful.  All you have
>>to do is replace the cylinder head every 25,000 miles.  Oh yes, and make
>>sure you have both metric and standard tools....
>
>
>I know a woman who has a 1984 Escort wagon with >100k miles.  Her maintenance
>has been oil changes, tuneups, and one brake job.

A friend of mine bought a 1982 Escort.  For those of you who don't know, th
Escort has an engine designed and constructed by Renault, which has no valve
clearance to speak of.  This means that when the engine loses timing, the
pistons come up and smack the valves, causing the valves to bend and possibly
the pistons to crack.  Now, this in itself is bad, except that the timing
belt is very undersized for the amount of torque that it has to carry.

Now, this friend of mine had a bit of trouble.  At about 10,000 miles, the 
timing belt broke, and the valves were destroyed.  The Ford dealer replaced
the entire cylinder head for free, considering that the belt is supposed to
be replaced only every 50,000 miles.  However, at the 45,000 mile mark, the
belt broke again, and Ford would not repair it.

So, he gave the car to me, since I was driving a '72 Toyota at the time.  I
replaced the valves and remachined the head.  I couldn't get a new head.
When I called up junkyards, they all had '82 Escorts on the lot, but none
of them had good cylinder heads on them.  I should have viewed this as a
warning.

I got about 10,000 miles on the car (which is about two to three month's
driving for me; I live out in the boonies and it's a bit of a drive to
get into work).  Then, the timing belt broke.  I wasn't going to fix it
again.  I went back to my '72 Toyota (which I continued to drive until
its crankshaft broke in 1991... it had 298,000 miles on it at the time).
I gave the Escort to a friend of mine who is a professional mechanic.

He replaced the head, and gave the car to his daughter to drive to and from
school.  She got only about 6,000 miles on the thing until... you guessed it...
and then he towed it back to my place and left it in my driveway.

I should also point out that there are three bolts holding the water pump
to the side of the engine.  Two of them are metric.  One of them is not.
I don't have a clue why this is the case.
--scott
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: dave@jato.jpl.nasa.gov (Dave Hayes)
Subject: Re: *BAD* music group reorg will not be honored
Reply-To: dave@jato.jpl.nasa.gov
Organization: Jet Propulsion Lab - Pasadena, CA
Date: Thu, 12 Nov 1992 06:06:24 GMT

igb@fulcrum.co.uk (Ian G Batten) writes:
>> No way. If you folks won't compromise, I won't. Nyahh. <grin>
>Dave Hayes: a man who makes you a compromise you can't refuse.

We aim to please. 8)

Seriously...compromise means BOTH parties move towards the other. What
I am being offered is consideration ONLY if I completely give up.

Give me a break. 
-- 
Dave Hayes - Network & Communications Engineering - JPL / NASA - Pasadena CA
dave@elxr.jpl.nasa.gov       dave@jato.jpl.nasa.gov         ...usc!elroy!dxh

Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better 
than we deserve.
		-- George Bernard Shaw
Xref: sparky talk.bizarre:37083 misc.test:12789 alt.president.clinton:96
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,misc.test,alt.president.clinton
From: liuyh@vis.toronto.edu (Yuanhui Liu)
Subject: Re: Gloat
Organization: Department of Computer Science, University of Toronto
Date: 6 Nov 92 21:46:01 GMT

In article <BxBCKF.5zD@andy.bgsu.edu> dnebing@andy.bgsu.edu (Mr. Neb) writes:
>
>>>Say, if you suppose the existence of an omniscient, omnipresent God, do
>>>you suppose She gives a hoot about Her consitutional status in one
>              ^^^
>>>country on one little piddling speck of dirt on the edge of an
>>>average galaxy among billions of others?
>>>
>>>--  Teemu Leisti  /  U. of Helsinki, Finland  /  leisti@cc.helsinki.fi
>
>  Let me guess.  You're a feminist, right?
                           ^^^^^^^^
I fail to see the use of "she" instead of "he" can prove someone's
a feminist or not.  
>
Then I guess "IT" is a better word to use here,
after all, IF there is only ONE omniscient GOD, it must be asexual,
since there is no male or female version of that GOD(s), satisfied?
From: gerald@torolab4.vnet.ibm.com (Gerald Oskoboiny)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Please respond to this test post!!!
Keywords: dolt, chuckle
Date: 12 Nov 92 23:24:02 GMT
Reply-To: gerald@torolab4.vnet.ibm.com
Followup-To: misc.test
Organization: November is seafood month
Originator: gerald@gerald

In misc.test, lee@hsh.com (Lee Havemann) writes:

>Ok, we seem to have gotten the bugs out of the software!! I have received 
>replys from what seems like half of the population on the Internet :-)
>
>I would have liked to personally respond to everyone, but you wouldn't 
>believe the amount of email replys I received!
>
>Thanks again, everybody.....
From: rmk@rmkhome.UUCP (Rick Kelly)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: why is that?
Date: 9 Nov 92 14:54:40 GMT
Reply-To: rmk@rmkhome.UUCP (Rick Kelly)
Organization: The Man With Ten Cats

In article <92Nov08.2142.14294@crash.canon.co.uk> tim@crash.canon.co.uk writes:
>At Burger King, no VAT (Value Added Tax) is charged on Lemon Meringue
>Pies. Why is that?

Obvious.  There's no value added.

-- 

Rick Kelly	rmk@rmkhome.UUCP	unixland!rmkhome!rmk	rmk@frog.UUCP
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: why I love SGI
From: rmk@rmkhome.UUCP (Rick Kelly)
Organization: The Man With Ten Cats
Date: Thu, 5 Nov 1992 13:05:40 GMT
Reply-To: rmk@rmkhome.UUCP (Rick Kelly)

In article <Bx7n3x.C0z@encore.com> kschnitz@encore.com (Kevin Schnitzius) writes:
>dlwilson@fenix.encore.com (David L Wilson) writes:
>>When I first came here, I had a 16" X terminal, which soon stopped working.
>>When the repair dude came, he opened it up and said, "Oh, the rubber band
>>broke."  I though he was joking, but there was actually a rubber band holding
>>one of the SIMMs in place, because of a broken clip.
>
>I'd just like to say here that he is lying since we never fix anything
>around here, much less call a repairman.  If some piece of equipement
>fails to perform its primary function, it is summarily reassigned.
>
>I, as a matter of fact, have a lovely furniture set in my office which
>includes a 16" X-terminal ottoman.

So how is Encore doing since they slunk out of Massachusetts?

I don't here much about them these days.

-- 

Rick Kelly	rmk@rmkhome.UUCP	unixland!rmkhome!rmk	rmk@frog.UUCP
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: gerald@torolab4.vnet.ibm.com (Gerald Oskoboiny)
Subject: Re: rec.humor."funny"
Originator: gerald@gerald
Date: 13 Nov 92 16:24:33 GMT
Reply-To: gerald@torolab4.vnet.ibm.com
Organization: November is seafood month
Keywords: smirk, true

cj@eno.esd.sgi.com (C.J. Silverio) writes:

>I suppose I could build a time machine & go back & warn Lance
>not to wear that particular Hawaiian shirt for his date with
>Maddi, but otherwise my cheerleading is bootless.

The first time I read this, I read it as "hootless".

Gerald
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: pfinerty@nyx.cs.du.edu (big daddy hate box)
Subject: Re: two (2)
Followup-To: misc.test,rec.pets,misc.jobs.offered,talk.bizarre
Summary: i am waaayyy cool
X-Disclaimer: Nyx is a public access Unix system run by the University
	of Denver for the Denver community.  The University has neither
	control over nor responsibility for the opinions of users.
Keywords: die
Reply-To: satan@hell.com
Organization: Nyx, Public Access Unix at U. of Denver Math/CS dept.
Date: Fri, 6 Nov 92 16:56:14 GMT
Expires: never

In article <92Nov6.085309est.47889@neat.cs.toronto.edu> davidsor@math.concord.wvnet.edu (ROBERT DAVIDSON) writes:
>	HEY YOU GODDAMNED BASTARD I DON'T EVER WANT TO SEE YOU POST 
>SOMETHING LIKE TWO (2) AGAIN!  THERE ARE CHILDREN OUT THERE AND THEY 
>SHOULDN'T HAVE TO READ SMUT LIKE THIS!  DON'T DO IT AGAIN OR I WILL FLAME 
>THE HELL OUT OF YOU!.
>
>LATER, ROBERT
>

robert, it seems you have been sending out foolish e-mail to people
besides me. the above posting was not only a waste of bandwith but a poor
attempt at a flame. you must be more insistant when you flame and always
use at least three paragraphs to get your point across. another flaw was
taht you failed to quote the article in its entirety. please be more
careful in the future or i will be forced to tell your sister your
cheating on her with your mother. 
--
	     PJF--->BIOCHEM GRAD. STUDENT--U of UTAH oh yeah 
               "i am such a stupid,ignorant son of a bitch.
                           please kill me now."
						          "React with this!"
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: gooley@netcom.com (Mark. Gooley)
Subject: short shameful confessions
Organization: Netcom - Online Communication Services  (408 241-9760 guest) 
Date: Mon, 9 Nov 1992 17:42:30 GMT

I have bought an electric meat grinder.

The instruction manual says "Rival Grinder."

I can hardly wait to get some rivals to grind up in it.

Mark., that blonde who won't go out with me must have a boyfriend...
gooley@netcom.com
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: jfw@jfwhome.FUNHOUSE.COM (John F. Woods)
Subject: Re: A Conservative's Nightmare
Organization: Misanthropes-R-Us
Date: Sat, 7 Nov 1992 15:21:57 GMT

In <1992Nov5.015832.28365@gagme.chi.il.us> pv@gagme.chi.il.us (Paul Vader) writes:
>D1: "Oh, look! [points to a small alcove in which hangs a portrait of Ronald
>    Reagan] What a perfect place for a Bob Mapelthorpe."

This *sentence* is my favorite article of the month.

Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: pfinerty@nyx.cs.du.edu (big daddy hate box)
Subject: bye for a few days
Organization: Nyx, Public Access Unix @ U. of Denver Math/CS dept.
Date: Sat, 7 Nov 92 00:31:07 GMT

well, i'm off to santa fe until the 12th for a meeting. hope i'm not
intercepted at the airport. i'm sure there will be some nifty messages
waiting for me when i return. hope you all have a good weekend and a good
first part of the week. if anyone hears something e-mail me. later,
								pat
--
	     PJF--->BIOCHEM GRAD. STUDENT--U of UTAH oh yeah 
               "i am such a stupid,ignorant son of a bitch.
                           please kill me now."
						          "React with this!"
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: bkeiper@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu (Bryan S Keiper)
Subject: Overheard...
Followup-To: Oh, nothing in particular
Keywords: bork, bork, bork
Organization: The Ohio State University
Date: Mon, 9 Nov 1992 22:42:50 GMT


     This was actually overheard in a conversation.

     Woman:  "So, what do you want to do once you graduate (college)?"
     Man:    "Play concert bass for a good orchestra."
     Woman:  "What if that doesn't work out?"
     Man:    "Well, then I think I'd like to be homeless."

               You've gotta have your goals!


     Also heard! This in a bar:

     Man:   "...and then my hand caught on fire."
     Woman: "Excuse me, what did you say?"
     Man:   "I said, 'And then my hand caught on fire'."


          Bryan Keiper
               bkeiper@magnusug.acs.ohio-state.edu

                    Still no catchy sig, so sorry, so sorry...
From: cliftonr@netcom.com (Pope Clifton)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: History repeats itself
Date: 10 Nov 92 23:35:30 GMT
Organization: t.b, t.p.d, & a.d
X-Newsreader: Tin 1.1 PL5

Cosmik Debris (mike@elec.canterbury.ac.nz) wrote:
: In article <7868@skye.ed.ac.uk>, ken@aiai.ed.ac.uk (Ken Johnson) writes:
: > I have no comment to make, I just like saying `Scientists believe that
: > intelligent life may have begun to evolve in Australia.'
: > 
: > origin-ally, Ken Johnson
: 
: And it hasn't progressed at all since!

 *SPWOT*

: "Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm schitzophrenic and so am I."
  [Kindly note unoriginal boring ripoff of inaccurate joke -- should be
   "schizoid", not "schizophernic", nor "schitzophrenic."]
: Cosmik Debris
  Doesn't X Industries have a new near-earth-orbit interception product
  to help deal with this kind of problem?

  Out, damned SPWOT!

  -- Clifton (irascible)

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