From: ewright@convex.com (Edward V. Wright)
Subject: Re: men in their thirties who never dated
Date: Sun, 27 Sep 1992 02:05:58 GMT
Organization: Engineering, CONVEX Computer Corp., Richardson, Tx., USA
X-Disclaimer: This message was written by a user at CONVEX Computer
              Corp. The opinions expressed are those of the user and
              not necessarily those of CONVEX.

In <MARTINC.92Sep26115753@grover.cs.unc.edu> martinc@grover.cs.unc.edu (Charles R. Martin) writes:

>Ed, you know what?  There are something like 5 million people in the Bay
>Area.  Big-time attendance at a Giants game is something like 40,000.

Have you ever heard of television, Charlie?  Do you know it's not
actually necessary to *go* to a baseball game in order to watch it?
Did you know that the World Series and the Super Bowl are the highest
rated programs on network television.  What?  They aren't?  I'm just
making that up because I'm a jerk?  Yeah, yeah, that's the ticket.

>But get a clue, man!  The Gulch is *full* of programmers!  They're *all*
>computer geeks just like you and me.  You've never *lived* until you've
>watched some of the softball games -- they're almost as funny as Giants
>games.

If they were really "computer geeks" they wouldn't even being trying
to play softball.  Or watching Giants games.

>Then there is this one voice from the wilderness saying "there's no one
>for me, everyone is only involved in finding someone who looks like
>Arnold Schwartzeneger, no one can love me for my mind."

The world is all black and white to you, isn't it, Charlie?  You take
a semi-committed jock like yourself, or your friends who play softball
in Richardson, Texas -- anyone who isn't a superathlete like Arnold
Schwartzenegger -- and me, and toss us both into the same category. The
world is not composed solely of people who look like Charlie Martin and
people who look like Arnold S.  There's a wide range of people in between
*and people on the other side.*  You're a *weightlifter*, for gosh sakes.
You may not be the best in the world at it, hell, you may be the worst
in your gym, but you are *not* a nonathlete.  When I say most women want
someone who exercises, I don't mean someone who spends his entire life
exercising like Arnold, I mean someone who exercises occassionally like
you.  


>It just doesn't seem to stand up to statistical examination at least.

Okay, you want statistics?  Consider this...

* There are roughly a million people living in Dallas.

* Roughly half of those (500,000) are women.

* Maybe a fifth of those are between the ages of 25 and 35 -- 100,000.

* About a third of those are single -- 34,000

* Probably half of those are without a boyfriend at the present time -- 17,000.

* Over half of them have gone to college -- 9,000.

* But fewer than half of all people who start college graduate -- 4,000.

* Maybe one in five college graduates goes on to get a graduate degree -- 800.

* Perhaps one out of every ten graduate degrees awarded to women is
  in science or engineering -- 80.

Now, realistically, I don't assume more than 10% of the women I am
interested in will be interested in me.  You would no doubt claim
some phantasmagorically higher figure, like 99 or 100%.  But we are
still talking about somewhere between 8 and 80 women who are somewhere
out there amongst a mass of one million people.





>But I think a dozen people here have tried to tell you that *our*
>impression of you -- from your self-pity, 

Self-pity?  That's rich coming from you, Charlie.  Who was it that
posted that blatant, whining plea for sympathy because Friday was
his tenth anniversary with his ex-wife, he didn't have a girl, etc.?


>your inability to tell the difference between an
>honestly-stated attempt to help and a personal attack, 

Rubbish.  I've *never* mistaken one of your personal
attacks for an honestly stated attempt to help.  I 
doubt you're even capable of an "honestly stated attempt
to help," and I'm sure you have no desire to do anything
of the sort.  You've even refused to answer email that I've
sent you because your cheap shots would be wasted without the
audience you have on the net.


>misquotation

Ah, I see you've read Lenin. -- "Always accuse the enemy of
doing what you intend to do yourself."  You have learned well,
Comrade! :-)

>It's because you're a jerk.

I thought this was the newsgroup that believed women always went
after jerks?  Go to KMart, Charlie.  Take a good look at the people
around you.  What do you see?  Aren't there plenty of people there
who are jerks?  Don't most of them seem to be happy with the people
they're with?  If they can do it, Charlie, you can, too.

>The problem isn't in how you *look*, Ed.  It's in who you are.  When you
>take some steps to fix *that* you'll be on your way.

And here we see what's really bothering you.  That there are people
in the world who do not think exactly the way you do.  Yes, if I want
to get anywhere in life, I've got to change myself, conform, be just
like you.  Sorry, Charlie, but what I'm looking for is someone who
will love me, not the spineless, gutless Charlie Martin clone you'd
like me to turn myself into.

>----------------------------------------------------------------------
>"I am he who walks the States with a barb'd tongue, questioning every
>one I meet,

Unfortunately, Charlie, you never question anything from the one
person you really should question -- yourself.
Newsgroups: soc.singles