From: jecoleb@eos.ncsu.edu (have clue, will travel)
Subject: Re: hermes, please pick up the white clue phone...
Reply-To: jecoleb@eos.ncsu.edu
Organization: The Ghost Of Christmas Past Society
Date: Fri, 22 Jan 1993 05:55:28 GMT


llama@ccwf.cc.utexas.edu (sine nomine) writes:

>most people agree that angst is what you feel in response to the 
>realization that life sucks and really doesn't have any great design 
>behind it. people write here about the echoes of this futility in their 
>lives, about the pain of fighting this void, about why and how they 
>manage to find (or create) meaning in their lives anyway.

hmmm.

personally, I agree with the above 100%, but I'd also add that angst is not
NECESSARILY a truly depressing experience.  humbling, yes.  unavoidable, yes.

I guess what I'm driving at is that I'd include that feeling of helplessness
when you think you've figured life out, you're content with your current
existence/life pattern/failure rate/car/job/attempts to change/whatever,
and you appear to be acting under your own volition when *WHAM!* something
from COMPLETELY out of the blue wriggles in, yells "Boo!" and screws up
all of your ideas about why things happen the way they do.

Mother Nature DOES play dice with the Universe.  Sadly, they're loaded.

now, whatever event Life/Destiny/The Void chooses to smack you on the head
with a rolled-up newspaper with doesn't HAVE to be sad, bad or depressing.
in my case, many of life's little surprises have been pleasant in some ways.
it's just that angsting over the GOOD things in life is commonly known as
"gloating," and the BAD or indifferent things tend to stick in our collective
craw a little longer.  not to mention that we often have more of a need to
talk out the negative/indifferent/stunning occurances in our life with others
who've gone through similar straits, which appears to be why we're here.

the feeling of "What the HELL is going on in my life, and how the HELL am
I supposed to deal with it?" will blow your mind, whether good OR bad OR both.
now, THAT's angst-able, in my book, or I'm a tree slug.

to really deal with it, a reaaaaaaaaally good sense of perspective is needed
to see ALL the pros and cons in a given situation.  the person I know who's
got her shit together BEST (IMHO) of those that I know chalks it all up to
Destiny, lives her life as she wants to live it and doesn't sweat it when
things cock up, as it's merely a sign that she needs to readjust her current
goals to one more relevant or realistic.

nice style, if you can hack it.  requires a LOT of self-confidence, though. 
that's not my particular stock in trade, so I end up waffling a lot.

so, what we're saying, Hermes, is this: while you may be a naturally 
cheerful person, and while there are people who read this group who can
empathize with that, that's not the usual emotion that permeates this group.
you aren't going to be able to change that on your own, so tone it down.

there's a lot of pain, a lot of heartache, and a lot of bitching, whining and
moaning, but most of all there's the wondrous feeling of Life reaching out 
and gently applying a 30,000 volt stun-gun to your frontal lobes at regular
intervals.  entering a forum full of people who've been thwapped by Life and
applying smilies, *HUG*s and a generally bubbly, cheerful outlook on life
is much like going around an Intensive Care ward and asking to sign
everyone's casts and saying "Aren't you glad you didn't lose BOTH arms?"

true, you may get a smile or two in return, but in general those who can move
will do so by throwing large, blunt objects at you.

when in a room filled with people in pain, do your best to be friendly, but
above all try to be subtle, quiet and non-bubbly.  those who actually give
a damn will look a lot more kindly upon you, and once the flames die down
you might even find some answers around her, or at least some new questions.

:)  (token smiley -- what the hell, I only live once)

				 
--
     jecoleb@eos.ncsu.edu      \\        pope@aza.csc.ncsu.edu    
 "I don't know where you took   --=--   To KLH: Love ya, Katya!
 me, but I didn't want to leave."   \\  have clue, will travel.
       ---------------------------------------------------
Newsgroups: alt.angst