From: jgacker@news.gsfc.nasa.gov (James G. Acker)
Subject: B&B:  Shorty (uh-huh)
Organization: Goddard Space Flight Center
X-Newsreader: TIN [version 1.1 PL6]
Date: Mon, 4 Jan 1993 21:25:57 GMT


	Well, my guess is that Fetus Forrester, now known as
Ms. Tiny Forrester, was about, oh, 26 inches long and 6.34 lbs.
Where did they get a baby that small for the birth scene?

	New Year's Eve-nts on "The Bold and the Beautiful"

	FIRST YOU TURN OFF THE AUTOPILOT:
	THEN PULL UP ON THE STEERING CONTROLS VERY SLOWLY:
	MAKE SURE YOU DON'T FALL BELOW STALL SPEED!
	THEN LEVE...  OH SORRY, WRONG MOVIE!

	Ridge is in the cabin with Brooke in active labor.  He realizes
he's in way too deep, and that the calvary (in the form of a backpacking
nurse-midwife with snowshoes) is not coming over the hill.  He jumps in
the car and dials up Taylor, who he figured out was at Stephanie's after
her derailed attempt to go after Ridge and Brooke at the cabin (the ranger
didn't let her through).  Taylor swallows her worries about emotional-
bonding and gives Ridge the Cliff Notes for Birth 101.  Hot water, wash
your hands, clear the baby's mouth, make sure he/she is breathing, cut
the umbilical cord, massage Brooke's tum-tum to expel the placenta,
placentera, pletc.  Ridge gets all the notes down.
	Back in the cabin, Ridge heats the water and sterilizes the
scissors and string, while helping Brooke breathe through the
contractions.  Convincing acting here by KKL:  of course, she's had two
and probably knows what it's really like.  In the time between
contractions and before transition, they wonder if it'll be a boy or
a girl.  Or something else, like a fly pupae or an alien.  Hey, it
could happen.
	Finally, the blessed moment arrives, but even though it's
12:01 A.M. 1/1/93, without a doctor in attendance they can't certify
the babe for the "First Baby of the Year" presents.  Oh well!  Brooke
pushes hard,  Ridge keeps his composure and his hair combed, and Ms.
Tiny Forrester pops out, does a few squalls, and Ridge awards Brooke
a purple & red newborn, whom Brooke is certain is Ridge's little girl.
Smiles all around.

	SHE COULDN'T HAVE PLANNED THIS

	Post-call, Taylor and Stephanie consider the situation.
Stephanie thinks that Brooke had every move planned.  Taylor doesn't
think that even Brooke would go out in a howling blizzard to have
a baby alone with Ridge and no attending obstetrician -- would she?
I mean, WOULD SHE?

	THESE WRITERS JUST WANT TO TORTURE MY POOR MACY

	At the Spectras, Sally, dolled up in white, requests that Macy
come out with them and do the town on the Eve.  (Boy, it sure went
from Christmas Eve to New Year's Eve in a hurry on this show.)  Macy
doesn't feel like it -- she recalls how the Eve was with Thorne
(hubba hubba) and how she can't believe he is now ringing in ALL the
changes (wink) with Karen.  Soodenly, the bell rings.  It's a
delivery man with a single yellow rose, and an unsigned card that says
"Macy -- You and Me, Together, New Year's Eve, 10:00."  Macy practically
jumps out of her clothes (I wish) that Thorne has come to his senses (we
wish) and walked out on Karen and is coming back to Macy to-night.  Sally
notes that the writing doesn't look like Thorne's, but Macy is
convinced, and goes to put on the ritz and dress to the 9's.
	Which she does.  Uh huh.  Hubba hubba.  Macy in a little black
dress, you all can guess the ress.
	After Sally leaves, a breathless Macy awaits the door.  The
ring of the bell arrives.  Macy promenades up the staircase, and opens the
door.  It's Sly!  (Itoldyouso.)  Macy says "Sly, why are you wearing that
tuxedo?"   "Cuz you and me are goin' out tonight, babee!  Maybee?"
Macy says sorry, Thorne's coming by, he got a rise out of me with a rose.
So sorry, Sly says, that was my rose.  I figured you'd be alone tonight, so
I offered my... services.  Macy fights the thought, but when it sinks in
she angrily tells Sly he was cruel, not to mention unusual, and she'd
never ever ever ever, ever ever, ever ever ever, ever ever ever ever ever,
consider going out for even a hamburger and fries with him.  Doe-eyed
Sly flees while Macy slams and then sobs.
	I see 'em together around April.  Place your bets. (Just as Thorne
comes to his senses too, natch.)

	Tune in Monday, when Ridge says:

	"Don't you think Snow Forrester is kind of an appropriate name?"

	Mark my words.

	Jim "I got another flash:  ice-ice crystals - CRYSTAL!!!" Acker
	jgacker@neptune.gsfc.nasa.gov

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