HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: taina@cs.Helsinki.FI (Juha Taina)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Summary: dating a friend
Date: 26 Aug 92 11:16:00 GMT
Organization: University of Helsinki, Finland

In <1992Aug26.034525.16547@panix.com> jis@panix.com (Jack Szwergold) writes:

>In <29038@hydra.Helsinki.FI> taina@cs.Helsinki.FI (Juha Taina) writes:
>>The other day I asked people if they would date a friend.  I got *three*
>>replies.  Two would date a friend, one said that too much friendship
>>is a bad thing.

>I think that if you HAVE been good platonic friends for a long time, then
>become more than "friends" can be incredibly awkward.   I would say no. 
>To much at stake, such as losing the original friendship.  Trust me, I've
>discussed this with my best friend (Who happenss to be a girl) in depth. 
>It won't work.....

I agree with you about platonic friendships.  I have a lot of platonic
friends that I wouldn't want to date at all.  Still some people say
that it's impossible to have a pure platonic friendship with a MOTAS.

But being friends for too long for a relationship.  I'm not sure about
that.  How much is too much anyway?  It might take a long time before
I'm attracted to someone and some sides that I find in her might first
be neutral but later become positive.  It's been discussed in other
s.s threads.

>But....

>If you really, both feel the urge to go further with your relationship, do
>it.  Too often, I find that friends try to force a romantic relationship
>only when they are 1) lonely 2)desperate 3) on the rebound 4) all of the
>above.   This is NOT a good situation at all.  No relationship, no matter
>how petty or how deep can ever be forced.  It takes time....

That's right.  It's no good to force a relationship.  Personally I
wouldn't call someone a friend if they tried to force me to do
something.  Still, it doesn't change the fact that at least some
people would rather date a friend than a stranger.  I don't know how
common this behaviour is and my survey certainly didn't help to know.
I'm not going to date anyone in the near future.  If I did, I'd rather
date someone that I know.

Juha
-- 
Juha Taina | taina@cs.helsinki.fi | Phone: +358-0-708-4247
From: nance@cbnewsd.cb.att.com (nancy.l.colucci)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Commitment--The C-word?
Date: 25 Aug 92 20:20:38 GMT
Organization: AT&T

In article <1992Aug25.162227.24637@cs.ucla.edu> gds@cs.ucla.edu (Greg Skinner) writes:
>In article <1992Aug25.151319.13394@cbnewsd.cb.att.com> nance@cbnewsd.cb.att.com (nancy.l.colucci) writes:
>
>There is the possibility that he's been LJBFed by such women, for
>example, if they find him unattractive.

Hmmm.  Well maybe he should change himself to suit their needs?  :-)
>
>There is also the possibility he lives in a place where such women are
>not readily available.

Like where?  The Western Frontier in 1874?
>
>Then, of course, you could be right ...

Nah.  Me??

-Nance
-- 
Nance Colucci  *^*^*^*^*^*    o__    *^*^*^*^*  |  Work that body!
att!ihlpk!colucci            _.>/               | Stay fit for life.
                            (_) \(_)
From: johnf@Auspex.COM (John Fereira)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Lurkers...
Date: 28 Aug 92 01:15:32 GMT
Organization: Auspex Systems, Inc.

In article <1992Aug26.214548.17263@odin.corp.sgi.com> lana@magenta.corp.sgi.com (Lana Mountford) writes:
|I've subscribed and unsubscribed to about a dozen 
|groups so far, but I keep coming back to soc.singles (although keeping up 
|with the traffic here can be a bit of a problem -- I mean, I *DO* work! :-)),

So *that's* why you haven't responded to my email?

-- 
+============================================================================++
| John Fereira            "Is that all you ever think about?"                |
| johnf@auspex.com                                                           |
+============================================================================++
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: markh@csd4.csd.uwm.edu (Mark)
Subject: Re: Notifying the Recipient (was: Re: The Dawn of Suckups (Was: Re: Bananas))
Organization: Computing Services Division, University of Wisconsin - Milwaukee
Date: Mon, 31 Aug 1992 14:33:01 GMT

In article <ewillims.715268399@unix1.tcd.ie> ewillims@unix1.tcd.ie (Emma Williams) writes:
>In <1992Aug29.173309.5762@uwm.edu> markh@csd4.csd.uwm.edu (Mark) writes:
>>I'm sure that she'll be able to tell you, herself, after she receives the Big
>>Notification. :)
>
>>After announcing the winner, it behooves us to remind the recipient to carefully
>>read the Small Print that comes with the Notification -- with a microscope even.
>	In case there is a sneaky little sub-clause stating that the victim,
>I mean winner, has to be indentured to you for life?  (*GRIN*)

A proposal?  Hmm, that WOULD be a suprise, wouldn't it?  Certainly fits the
description. :)
From: bmeyer@feds12.prime.com (Robert A Meyer x2557 14-13)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Boston Baby Boink
Keywords: Paaahty, Baaahston, Wicked Pissah!
Date: 1 Sep 92 20:50:52 GMT
Reply-To: bmeyer@feds12.Prime.Com (Bob Meyer)
Organization: Prime Computervision, Bedford MA


 Here's the latest:

 Friday Evening, Sept 11, 1992

      The Friday night mixer

      Meet for cocktails in Boston (location to be decided) 
      perhaps dinner before, for those who can make it.

 Saturday, Sept 12, 1992

      Cambridge River Festival

       Fun on the banks of the Charles River, outside of Harvard square.
       Ethnic food, art, performances, live music, dancing, face painting, 
       lots of wierd people, etc.

      Saturday Night Party

       Beer, dancing, mingling, conversation, throwing furniture out the window.
       At my apartment in East Boston. This should be a large bash, to which
       I've invited many people, not just from the net. Just kidding about the
       furniture. We'll do that when we have the boink at *your* place!

 Sunday, Sept 13, 1992

       To be announced. Many possibilites, Brunch, harbor cruise, back to the
       River festival, beach trip, sightseeing, etc. What would *you* like to 
       do? 
        

 Rsvp please:  bmeyer@feds12.Prime.Com (Bob Meyer)

       Also let me know if you have any questions, ideas or suggestions.
       I will be emailing those who have alreadly replied. 
 
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: rudoff@mdd.comm.mot.com (Doug Rudoff)
Subject: Desperation (was Re: Commitment--The C-word?)
Organization: Motorola, Mobile Data Division - Seattle, WA
Date: Tue, 25 Aug 1992 18:39:26 GMT

In article <9208250123.AA25823@regal.cisco.com> mlb@CISCO.COM (Marcia Bednarcyk) writes:
>In article <1992Aug24.171205.26983@mdd.comm.mot.com>, rudoff@mdd.comm.mot.com (Doug Rudoff) writes:
>|> There are people who are desperate for *anyone*.
>|> 
>|> And there are people who are desperate for the right person.
>|> 
>|> The former are generally people to avoid relationships with.
>
>Question: how do you tell the former from the latter?
>
>I've run into a few of the latter, and they tend to look at you, decide if
>you are The One, and if you're not, they don't have time to get to know you,
>since they are desperately searching for him/her....
>
>I guess to me, desperation is desperation is desperation.

I think I'll change what I wrote above. Here are three stories of
my encounters with women that I thought were desperate.

Number one called me _five_ months after I responded to her personal
ad. We met, was not really attracted to her, but decided to go on a
date. The date was not too exciting, no chemistry between us.
Afterwards, she invited me into her place. As we were sitting on the
couch talking it was clear to me she wanted me to make a pass at her.
I had no desire to see her again. I left saying it was getting late.
She called me twice in the next few days and the second time I told I
just wasn't interested in pursuing anything.

Number two I met at a restaurant. A few days later we went for a walk.
I decided that she wasn't all that interesting and the fact that she
was a fanatically born again Christian (and I'm not a Christian) meant
that there was no point in going further with anything. _Five_ months
later she calls me up (Is there is something about desperate women and
five months?) We did go out twice, but I wasn't really interested in
her and it seemed to me that she was looking for any man to do things
with.

Number three I met at party a few months ago. She was very attractive
and there was definitely chemistry between us. She did seem desperate
in the way she said things like, "I go to bed early, but you can call
me anytime since no one ever calls me." She came to my place for
dinner about two weeks after we met, and well, the evening was about
as successful as my failed souffle. The chemistry that was there when
we met wasn't there. A few weeks later she told me she had a boyfriend
(who I assume she met after we first met). I ended up with the
frustrating feeling that I didn't act quick enough.

With the experience with number three, I will say that as long as I'm
attracted to the desperate person, I have no problem with desperation.
But when the attraction is one-sided, it's best to avoid the person.

-- 
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Doug Rudoff          Motorola, Seattle    INTERNET:rudoff@mdd.comm.mot.com
                                            USENET:uunet!mdisea!rudoff   
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: greg@netcom.com (Greg Bullough)
Subject: Uses of Chocolate (was: Finding Long Partners (Romantic))
Date: Thu, 27 Aug 92 02:00:44 GMT
Organization: Netcom - Online Communication Services  (408 241-9760 guest) 

In article <ewillims.714843551@unix1.tcd.ie> ewillims@unix1.tcd.ie (Emma Williams) writes:
>
>
>	Weird as it sounds, chocolate sauce on meat is an original use
>for chocolate. The Aztecs used to use it as a sauce and regarded it as
> delicacy. That's what I call chocoholism.....my kind of people! (*GRIN*)

Many of us Californios are acquainted with Enchiladas de Mole, which 
sport a really great sauce, with a nice chocolate/chile flavor. If you
didn't know it was chocolate, you'd never place the flavor.
 
Greg
From: johnf@Auspex.COM (John Fereira)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: lurkers and parties and cons - oh my!
Date: 31 Aug 92 18:58:51 GMT
Organization: Auspex Systems, Inc.

In article <85ucqB1w165w@wildrose.infoserv.com> rkf@wildrose.infoserv.com (Ray Fink) writes:
|stef@Apple.COM (Stef Jones) writes:
|> 
|> How about "I like to watch" ? :-)
|
|Probably much more effective than "Could you make me some food?".

How about a button which reads, "Will Post for Food".


-- 
+============================================================================++
| John Fereira            "Is that all you ever think about?"                |
| johnf@auspex.com                                                           |
+============================================================================++
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: blowfish@carina.unm.edu (rON.)
Subject: Re: BALLOON BOINK!!!  (you are getting sleepy.  you will attend.)
Date: Wed, 02 Sep 92 06:34:39 GMT
Organization: University of New Mexico, Albuquerque

In article <yxjn24f@lynx.unm.edu> hays@TECHNET.NM.ORG writes:
>Just in case you just joined soc.singles' (ir)regularly scheduled programming
>or if you were just released from a state-operated institution, or if you've
>been dead until recently or something...

Um, I've been recently 'released' (well, its temporary, and as long as I stay
on my medication they >said< it would be OK), and I'm helping >organize<
this, this _thing_.... :)

>The bad news is that it's during and designed around the Albuquerque
>International Balloon Fiesta, so local lodging is expensive and is getting
>terribly scarce (make reservations TODAY!)  There is still crash space
>available.  (Isn't there, rON?)

There is hotel space (though its selling out quickly! If your considering
attending, and want to stay in a hotel, better make reservations NOW.
Seriously. The entire town will be sold out of hotel rooms by probably the
middle of September.
The good news is that there is crash space available, both at Larrys place
and mine- so if you is too poor or too slow to get a hotel room, let either
of us know you need the space... :)

I will be meeting with Larry tomorrow and we'll be hashing out the final
details of the schedule, and I'll post it tomorrow night, so if you're 
interested, you can come, er, attend. :)

(Oh! One of >those< sorta parties, eh?) :)
r.
BalloonBoink! Albuquerque, NM! Oct 2-4! Write this account for details!
From: liz@prc.unisys.com (Liz Loquacious)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Can we can the suck-up bit?
Date: 1 Sep 92 19:31:25 GMT
Followup-To: soc.singles
Organization: Paramax Systems

In article dbj@cs.washington.edu (Dave Johnson) writes:
|> In article liz@prc.unisys.com (Liz Loquacious) writes:
|> >
...stuff deleted...
|> >lawn maintenance he's taken to cutting the portion of my lawn which is 
|> >adjacent to a lawn which he gets paid to cut and it takes about 20 minutes
|> >off my lawn cutting time since he now does this.  I'm not offended at all.
...stuff deleted...

|> 
|> Aha!  No wonder the excrutiatingly sensitive James got LJBF'd!
|> Liz found a lawn-mowing SLUT!

And I even get to see the sweat bead up on his bare tanned chest as I
watch him from my bedroom window, going back and forth, not missing a single 
blade....I forgot all about James....

Liz Loquacious - actually Mr. Cxxxxxx (to protect the innocent) is doing
                 this in his retirement; he's got kids my age.  I like
                 older men but....
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: hays@TECHNET.NM.ORG (Larry 'Purple' Hays)
Subject: Re: Where the best posts come from
Date: Tue, 01 Sep 92 17:19:20 GMT
Organization: New Mexico Technet   Albuquerque, NM
Reply-To: hays@TECHNET.NM.ORG

In article <ewillims.715345812@unix1.tcd.ie>, ewillims@unix1.tcd.ie (Emma Williams) writes:
>In <1992Aug31.145843.12719@walter.bellcore.com> walter (Walter Lego) writes:
>
>>In article <1992Aug31.080547.3513@nwnexus.WA.COM> enigma@halcyon.com (Matt Luders) writes:
>>>Keith Garrard writes:
>>>
>>>> A little note though, the most interesting posts come from "Angelwing".
>>>
>>>In my humble opinion, the most interesting posts come from stef@apple.com.
>>>She's thoughtful, articulate, and witty--a clear, strong signal in a
>>>cacophony of noise.
>>>
>
>>*SNORT* Emma gets my vote. The rest of the women just strut.
>
>	I like Walter's posts.  They shine forth with his intelligence!
>						(*GRIN*)

Well, *I* think that it's pretty hard to beat that 'Purple hays' guy...
He's really entertaining.
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: thurlow@convex.com (Robert Thurlow)
Subject: Re: SOC.SINGLES
Date: Sat, 29 Aug 1992 05:23:01 GMT
Organization: Engineering, CONVEX Computer Corp., Richardson, Tx., USA
X-Disclaimer: This message was written by a user at CONVEX Computer
              Corp. The opinions expressed are those of the user and
              not necessarily those of CONVEX.

In <71754@apple.Apple.COM> stef@Apple.COM (Stef Jones) writes:

>ta-vg11@muddnext4.cc.columbia.edu (Vikas Gupta) writes:

>>Please enlighten this lost sole( or is it soul?? (see !! totally lost))

>I think the newsgroup you want is alt.bottom-feeders.

Either that or alt.shoemaking.

Rob T
--
Rob Thurlow, thurlow@convex.com
Across the evening sky, all the birds are leaving
But how can they know it's time for them to go?		- Sandy Denny
From: reykja@hpfcso.FC.HP.COM (Reykja Sigurdsson)
Date: Mon, 24 Aug 1992 08:32:47 GMT
Subject: Re: Various ramblings...
Organization: Hewlett-Packard, Fort Collins, CO, USA
From: drmax@casbah.acns.nwu.edu (Marianna Max)
Subject: Re: Bananas
Organization: Northwestern University, Evanston Illinois.
Date: Fri, 28 Aug 1992 14:02:47 GMT

In article <1992Aug27.195538.20840@panix.com> pw@panix.com (Paul Wallich) writes:
>In article <1992Aug26.152200.25679@news.acns.nwu.edu> drmax@casbah.acns.nwu.edu (Marianna Max) writes:
>>In article <kiran.714829832@bronze.ucs.indiana.edu> kiran@bronze.ucs.indiana.edu (Kiran Wagle) writes:
>>>pw@panix.com (Paul Wallich) writes:
>>>>Of course, on rethinking the situation, I've realized that such
>>>>a kind, gentle, tolerant person as Max would never be jealous.
>>>>Nevermind.
>>>
>>>You forgot "sweet"... and "cute" too.
>>>
>>Well yeah but what pray tell does that have to do with the capacity to feel
>>jealousy?  I mean really one has to covet something that someone has in
>>order to feel jealous no? What exactly Paul did you imagine that I might covet?
>
>The attention, nay adulation lavished on bananarasts,
>the position of, uh, top banana, er, alpha woman, so to speak?
>
>paul

Boy have you got me pegged wrong.
From: swann@acsu.buffalo.edu (Stephen Swann)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Where the best posts come from
Date: 1 Sep 92 02:31:52 GMT
Organization: UB

In article <la4pdaINNl25@news.bbn.com> dhardin@spcink.bbn.com (Dawn Hardin) writes:
>
>Isn't anybody going to mention any men?  How about the sensitive james
>dutton?  Or Steve Swann?  Or James Nicole?  Or.... whoops, I guess it's 
>a waste of time to suck up to the men, huh?

Hell, no - the check's in the mail. 

-- 
Steve Swann                 |    Speak to me in many voices; make
swann@acsu.buffalo.edu      |      them all sound like one...  -BOC
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: thurlow@convex.com (Robert Thurlow)
Subject: Re: Friendly Cities
Date: Sat, 29 Aug 1992 05:24:13 GMT
Organization: Engineering, CONVEX Computer Corp., Richardson, Tx., USA
X-Disclaimer: This message was written by a user at CONVEX Computer
              Corp. The opinions expressed are those of the user and
              not necessarily those of CONVEX.

In <1992Aug27.070238.22432@igor.tamri.com> gary@igor.tamri.com (Gary Schwartz) writes:

>But it's interesting being on the receiving end of the startled look
>when I go back to New York.

My first-and-only (so far) visit to "Joisey" was to visit a customer
who was, um, less than completely satisfied with one of our products.
I was in the passenger seat of a car being driven by one of our sales
guys, and as we were stopped at a light near our destination, a guy
started frantically waving at me.  When I rolled down the window, he
asked moi, the expatriate-Canadian-trapped-in-forchristsakes-Texas,
directions to the Holland Tunnel.  After my car-mates gave him the
information I craved, I mutterer, "why did he ask _me_ that?"  My
driver answered, "because you were the only one dumb enough to make
eye contact".

Learn something new about clinical sociology, see a glimpse of the
Statue of Liberty out the side window; all in all, a trip worth taking.

Rob T
--
Rob Thurlow, thurlow@convex.com
Across the evening sky, all the birds are leaving
But how can they know it's time for them to go?		- Sandy Denny
From: liz@prc.unisys.com (Liz Loquacious)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Seesters, I want the seesters.
Date: 31 Aug 92 14:54:29 GMT
Followup-To: soc.singles
Distribution: na
Organization: Paramax Systems

In article <1992Aug31.130110.26390@cbfsb.cb.att.com>, jjd1@cbnewsg.cb.att.com (james.j.dutton) writes:
|> In article <1992Aug28.184724.1165@gvl.unisys.com> liz@prc.unisys.com (Liz Loquacious) writes:
|> >
|> >Why your knees?  Well, it seems you're intimidated by tall women; guess
|> >we'll just be friends then.  Sorry dearie.
|>  
|> Maybe I prefer petite because that's whats all around when in fact
|> all my formative years have been consumed with dreams of meeting
|> a tall taught women I could lavish gifts/praise/favors(wink wink) on.
|> Maybe, just maybe.

And just what should this tall woman have been taught?  And taught well
I presume... ;-)

But I'm astonished at your willingness to try new things, expand your
horizons, go where no man has gone before (well, now that's not exactly
true!)...  or are you compromising yourself too much James?  Offering
gifts?  You'll wind up with more MealTicketDreamers if you put that in
your personal ad!  And goodness knows what kind of woman you'd get if
you let them know about the favors you'd perform!  Hi James. (wink wink)

Liz Loquacious 
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: jjd1@cbnewsg.cb.att.com (james.j.dutton)
Subject: Re: Please Help Me!
Organization: AT&T
Distribution: na
Date: Mon, 31 Aug 1992 14:19:30 GMT

In article <1992Aug30.062132.15719@zooid.guild.org> Ross Ridge <ross@zooid.guild.org> writes:
>chinj@acfcluster.nyu.edu writes:
>>I just turn single.  Right now I'm in a very depressed state of mind.
>>A friend of mine told me about this newsgroup and said I could meet
>>some interesting live people here that are nice and careing.
>
>Your friend is very cruel.
>

Well I for one would love to help you. I just need to get one little
question out of the way. Do you have any seesters?
 
================================================================================
 Sesquipedalian's 'R' Us. ZX-10. DoD#564. There ain't no more.
================================================================================
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: thurlow@convex.com (Robert Thurlow)
Subject: Re: Bananas
Date: Sat, 29 Aug 1992 15:57:39 GMT
Organization: Engineering, CONVEX Computer Corp., Richardson, Tx., USA
X-Disclaimer: This message was written by a user at CONVEX Computer
              Corp. The opinions expressed are those of the user and
              not necessarily those of CONVEX.

In <kiran.715078940@bronze.ucs.indiana.edu> kiran@bronze.ucs.indiana.edu (Kiran Wagle) writes:

>For example, if I suggested that someone was lovely and talented, and
>cute, and PERKY even, and it were true, would I be sucking up?

You bet.  Making a big deal about such obvious traits is first-class
up-sucking.  Actually, this reporter wonders if you can really suck
up effectively by making statements that aren't true :-)

Rob T
--
Rob Thurlow, thurlow@convex.com
Across the evening sky, all the birds are leaving
But how can they know it's time for them to go?		- Sandy Denny
From: aaron@minster.york.ac.uk
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: The Chocolate Urgies (was: Re: Finding Romantic Partners (long))
Date: 28 Aug 92 08:45:40 GMT
Organization: Department of Computer Science, University of York, England
X-Newsreader: Tin 1.1 PL5

Emma Williams (ewillims@unix1.tcd.ie) wrote:
: In <1992Aug26.172906.25719@uwm.edu> markh@csd4.csd.uwm.edu (Mark) writes:
:
: >There must be something hormonal about women and chocolate.
: 
: 	There is a connection...read my earlier posting.
: I did say it was chemical but some body out there, better qualified
: than I to comment on this, may disagree with me and say it is 
: hormonal!
:  

	I'm sure I remember reading that it isn't just women who are
	susceptible but chocolate contains a substance that can fool
	almost anyone into thinking they are in love. Certainly 
	chocolate is very necessary - I can't survive for long without
	it (luckily York is the chocolate capital of Northern England)

+----------------------------------------------------------------------------+
|     Aaron Turner               | "Bloody your hands on a cactus tree       |
|     aaron@minster.york.ac.uk   |  Wipe it on your dress and send it to me" |
+----------------------------------------------------------------------------+
From: wjb@moscom.UUCP (Bill de Beaubien)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Powerful forces of nature conspire
Date: 30 Aug 92 01:04:28 GMT
Organization: Moscom Corp., Pittsford, NY
X-Newsreader: Tin 1.1 PL5

Mark (markh@csd4.csd.uwm.edu) wrote:
: In article <4053@moscom.UUCP> wjb@moscom.UUCP (Bill de Beaubien) writes:
: >Mark (markh@csd4.csd.uwm.edu) wrote:
: >: 
: >: If I were single and had plenty of free time, I probably would have been
: >: laid. :)  However, I'm involved with a special woman at this time.
: >
: >The arresting officer was female? :-)
: 
: You mean, as in handcuffs, strip searches, detention, interrogation and
: supplication to a figure of higher authority??

Sounds arresting to me.  Does she have a sister for James? :-)
-- 
"Bless me, Father; I ate a lizard."
"Was it an abstinence day, and was it artificially prepared?"
-------------------------------------------------------------
Bill de Beaubien / wjb@moscom.com 
Newsgroups: soc.singles