From: judy@locus.com (Judy Leedom Tyrer)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: Not limiting sweets
Date: 17 Nov 92 23:10:24 GMT
Distribution: usa
Organization: Locus Computing Corporation, Los Angeles, California

In article <cindy.138@berkp.uadv.uci.edu> cindy@berkp.uadv.uci.edu (Cindy Windham) writes:
>I agree with the "no bad foods" philosophy, but I have a son who becomes
>a whirling demon whenever he eats even one small piece of candy, or
>drinks as little as 4 oz. of soda.  His little brother doesn't have
>this kind of reaction to sweets, so I don't have a problem with him
>eating them.  How would you handle a situation like this?  He's not
>just full of energy - it's a very negative type of energy.  He jumps
>up and down on the beds, throws things at us (he threw a wrench at me
>yesterday), spits, pushes his brother down, etc. when he's "under the
>influence".  I've never seen anything like it.  I'm really beginning
>to worry about him, and I'm considering taking him to see a psychologist.
>He is beyond reason - it doesn't even seem like he can hear us at
>these times. 
>

This is an excellent question.  What you are describing is a reaction to a
food substance, in this case sugar.  You can take two approaches.  The first
is to limit the substance "because Mommy says so" and the other is to 
encourage the child to recognize his food reaction and choose whether he
wishes to behave the way he does when he is having a reaction.  I think this
is probably easier for allergies where welts, hives, or some other serious
allergic reaction takes place.  But I also think it is possible, depending
on the age of the child, to teach the child this with hyper reactions like
you describe.

Before your child eats sugar, explain that you've noticed this behavioral
change.  Get him to describe how he feels while he's not on sugar.  Then,
let him eat sugar and ask him about 30 minutes later how he feels.  Does he 
like the feeling?  Does he like the way people are responding to him?  Etc.

If you can get the child to make the connection between what he eats and
how he feels, he may find that he can learn to control this food himself.
He might decide, "We're going to the park all day today, so I can eat candy
because I will be running and can burn it off" one day and then realize another
day "I'm going to school today, so I don't want the excess energy sugar gives
me because it's hard to control myself at school."

I know I'm talking ideals here, and that this may not work for very young
chidlren.  But I know one child who at age 9 was taught that when he felt a
certain way he should tell people to "leave me alone, I'm feeling hostile"
and the arguments and behavior problems in that house diminished significantly
just by the recognition of this one mood shift that caused all kinds of problems
for this child.

I think the only people who are taught how to recognize how they feel from
moment to moment are actors.  I learned this as an actor and find that it
helps a lot just in regular life.  We always started any work with "How do
I feel" because you had to take you you feel now and adjust it to how the
character feels in this scene.  

It really helps to know how you feel and what feelings cause you to behave in
different ways.  We need to help our children learn to recognize mood swings,
illness, etc. and know when they just won't be up for certain types of 
behaviors. 

-- 
Judy Leedom Tyrer

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions"	- William Blake
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