From: at881@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (N. Nelson)
Newsgroups: rec.pets.dogs
Subject: The Party
Date: 7 Nov 1992 23:38:37 GMT
Organization: Case Western Reserve University, Cleveland, OH (USA)
Reply-To: at881@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (N. Nelson)
NNTP-Posting-Host: hela.ins.cwru.edu


I first posted this to rec.pets.cats, but since the dogs are
quite prominent players, and the reviews have been favorable,
here it is for the dog people :) It is a true story.

                            THE PARTY

THE CAST:
Annie and Dobber: 4 month old Chow/Lab mix pups
Tex and Sally: 3 month old tabby kittens - orange and gray, respectively
Izzy, Jane, and Amanda: The adult cats. Tortie, gray tabby, black.

THE SETTING:
A 1920's California bungalow, in the process of being remodeled. The
dining room, having no furniture and an unfinished floor, is where
the puppies are kept, with baby gates closing off the entrance to
the kitchen.

THE TIME:
A lazy fall afternoon. Mommy has gone shopping.

                    ACT I: The Fun

  (Dobber and Annie are dozing peacefully on their blanket, and are
  awakened by the cries of kittens.)
Tex: HEY! I got the pantry door open! BOY OH BOY is there a lot
of fun stuff in HERE!
Dobber: Food? Any food in there?
Tex: Dog food, cat food, PEOPLE food!!!!
Dobber: Well, get me some!
Tex: I can't carry any of this, I'm too small. Let me open your
baby gate. 
  (Tex deftly fiddles with the latch, releasing the pups
  into the forbidden kitchen.)
Dobber (surveying pantry): Yikes! Look at all that! If only there were
cat poopies, this would be a FEAST.
Annie: Um, you guys, we aren't supposed to be in the kitchen. We could
get in a lot of trouble for this, you know.
  (Dobber, having none too many brain cells to spare, burns a few trying
  to figure out how to have his fun and not get In Trouble.)
Tex (the bright one): We could always take it in to...your room!
  (By now the entire crowd has gathered, except Jane, who is sitting
  on the counter with her "this is NOT a good idea" expression.)
Dobber: Uh, yeah! Let's go!
  (Grabbing a bag of Iams kitten food, Dobber heads into the dining room. 
  Annie selects some breakfast cereal. Several more trips are made to
  accomodate everyone's tastes, including cat treats, potato chips, oatmeal,
  breadsticks (Izzy's personal favorite), more cereal, cookies, licorice,
  and two boxes of dog biscuits.)

<some time later>
Amanda (always the elegant): You know, this is a cool party, but we
really need decorations.
  (Dobber heads off obediently and returns with several rolls of paper
  towels. He plops them down on the floor and waits to be praised.)
Amanda: You stupid dog. You've only got it half right.
  (Several minutes of Extreme Shredding by all cats results in much
  improved festive atmosphere.)
Jane (from counter top): This is NOT a good idea. Trust me.
  (After several hours, most of the food is gone and every one flops
  down for a much needed nap.)

                   ACT II: Mommy Comes Home

  (Upon hearing keys in the door, all adult cats streak through the
  kitty door into the basement. Annie slinks quickly to the furthest
  corner of the kitchen, putting as much distance as possible between
  herself and the carnage. Dobber sits in the middle of the party floor.
  Sally sits in the doorway to the kitchen, ready to bolt. Tex sits
  happily next to Dobber, munching on a cheerio he holds in his paw.)
Mommy: What the !?!?!?!??!
  (Mommy surveys the wreckage. Being an experienced Raiser of Furballs,
  she goes to the kitchen and gets a trash bag, trying to keep the
  smile from her face.)
Mommy: This looks like it was one incredibly great time, you guys.
   (Mommy begins picking up items from the dining room floor. As she
   discovers each new level of decadence, she dissolves into a pile
   of laughter in the middle of the floor.)

<fade to black>
Newsgroups: rec.pets.dogs