HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: barry@geovision.gvc.com (Barry Comer)
Subject: Re: what she wants
Organization: Not officially GeoVision Systems Inc., Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Distribution: na
Date: Fri, 4 Sep 1992 20:38:56 GMT

In <1992Sep2.215750.26614@news.nd.edu> (Angie) writes:

>women I know - I prefer all the "cutsie-shit" that a man will hand out!  As
>long as he's willing to spend money and time on you, then take it!  Why? 
>Well, simply because later on in the relationship, it just will not happen.

>stale potatoe chips!  So, men, give us all you've got, and Ladies, TAKE IT
>because later on there will be nothing for you to receive besides headaches
>and heartbreaks!

For what it is worth:

	I don't know about other guys, but I like doing the "cutsie-shit".  It 
	makes me feel good to put a smile on a lady's face.  It does not have to 
	stop after two people settle into a relationship.  Angie, some of us 
	want to keep the newness going in a relationship and if keeping up the 
	"cutsie-shit" is part of it, then so be it.  It sounds to me like you 
	have had some heartbreaks in your life.  That is too bad, maybe you 
	need to look a little harder before jumping into things......

chow babe'
Barry 

P. S. Not all the good ones are taken!!
From: rpatel@eniac.seas.upenn.edu (Rachana D Patel)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Romantic Songs Discussion list
Date: 10 Sep 92 15:59:59 GMT

Organization: University of Pennsylvania

Here's a song that I think is very romantic.
I thought I would post the lyrics for you guys to read.


Groovy Kind of Love - Phil Collins
 
When I'm feeling blue
All I have to do
is take a look at you
then I'm not so blue
 
When you're close to me
I can feel your heartbeat
I can hear you breathing in my ear
Wouldn't you agree
baby you and me
we've got a groovy kind of love
 
Any time you want to
you can turn me on to
anything you want to
anytime at all
When I kiss your lips
Ooh I start to shiver
Can't control the quivering inside
Wouldn't you agree
baby you and me
we've got a groovy kind of love
 
Oh
 
When I'm feeling blue
all I have to do
is take a look at you
then I'm not so blue
when I'm in your arms
Nothing seems to matter
My whole world could shatter
I don't care
Wouldn't you agree
Baby you and me
We've got a groovy kind of love
We've got a groovy kind of love
We've got a groovy kind of love

 
========================================================================



--
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Rachana D. Patel                             rpatel@eniac.seas.upenn.edu
University of Pennsylvania                   Management and Technology Program 
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: regan1016@bestsd.sdsu.edu (T. ELIZABETH HARVEY)
Subject: Re: Romantic Songs Discussion list
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.4-b1  
Organization: San Diego State University - Dept. of Redundancy Dept.
Date: Tue, 8 Sep 1992 22:49:00 GMT

In article <1992Sep8.205324@cs.bham.ac.uk>, eyc@cs.bham.ac.uk (Ed Carter)                   writes...
>I just thought I'd de-lurk to wonder about this particular
>thread for a moment.
> 
>From what else I've read here, it seems that a useful social
>function could be served by starting a LJBF Songs Discussion
>List for people to listen to when utterly miserable. Either
>to cheer themselves up or, of course, to wallow in self pity.
> 
>After all, who needs music when you're in love?        :-)
>  
>(I only mentioned it 'cos I can only think of miserable songs
>at the moment and I was feeling left out. sniffle.)
Hey, nice idea ... I was thinking of the same thing, but I didn't want to 
start the tangential thread, but I'm willing to contribute.

There are oodles of songs that would fit this category, but this list 
simply *must* start with a Morrissey song, Morrissey being the Crown 
Prince of Melancholy.  Also, not only is this song one of my all-time 
favourites, it was also voted the #1 favourite song by the listeners of 
LA's alternative-rock station KROQ-FM:

        The Smiths --- "How Soon Is Now?"

Any more out there?

---<--<-{@ | "I believe that before all else, I am a reasonable human being,
Elizabeth  | just as you are -- or, at all events, that I must try and 
	   | become one." _A Doll's House_, Henrik Ibsen
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: s4lawren@student.business.uwo.ca (Stephen Lawrence)
Subject: Re:  Love
Organization: University of Western Ontario
Date: Sun, 6 Sep 1992 03:30:19 GMT

tdbear@tandon.com (Tom Barrett) writes:

> In article <1992Sep1.003337.18158@tandon.com> you write:
> >Oh, I'm sure it does... often though, my lovers simply don't
> >live up to ALL of my expectations.  They might satisfy my
> >intellectual needs, my social needs, my cuddling needs, my
> >sexual needs, etc., but maybe not ALL of those in one person.
> 
> To answer your question... no.  You (we) will *never* have all your needs met
> in one person and an attempt to do that will result in very unrealistic
> expectations that will. at best, create a large degree of uncomfort for you
> and your SO or more likely, will destroy the relationship.  It simply doesn't
> work that way and the sooner people realize this, the better off they'll be.
> This is one important reason to have friends.  To meet different needs.
> 
> And this is not just my opinion.  There's been lots written about this.
> Any bookstore would have numbers of books concerning this. 
> 
> David S.
> 
> 
> -- 
> Tom Barrett (TDBear)    tdbear@tandon.com          voice: 805-378-6207
> Tandon Corporation      609 Science Drive          Moorpark, CA  93021 
> Sr. HW Design Engineer  "War is Peace, No is Yes, And We're All Free!" 
> -=>NOTE:  The feed to tdbear@tandon.com may be interrupted in Sept.<=-

yammer
yammer
yammer
eh?
save

s4lawren@student.business.uwo.ca (Stephen Lawrence)
Western Business School  --  London, Ontario
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: mtompset@napier.uwaterloo.ca (Mark Tompsett)
Subject: Re: PAIN!
Organization: University of Waterloo
Date: Fri, 11 Sep 1992 17:43:51 GMT

In article <eagle.716184850@garfield.catt.ncsu.edu> eagle@garfield.catt.ncsu.edu (Daniel L'Hommedieu) writes:
>jbell@mihi.une.edu.au (Master of Puppets) writes:
>>well, life sux
>>pain hurts
>>and I wanna die
>I hope you don't mean that last line.

Oh hope so too. Trust me, death sux too!

>It really is true, what they say: once you forget about someone, and
>quit looking for someone else, someone will pop into your life.  I'm
>living proof of that one.

Sorry, but one person doesn't constitue a proof for me. Frankly, I've
given up on this stupid social game that everyone plays. I can't find one,
and I seriously doubt I will. I have ceased looking, and frankly, I don't
think it is worth it. After all, they are just going to dump you and go for
some cuter, younger, "sexier" guy. Do I sound negative? Well, that's because
I'm a negative person. Yes, I realize that may contribute as to why, but
if someone isn't willing to take a chance on me, then why should I change?

>Daniel L'Hommedieu / Junior, CSC Depatment, NCSU / eagle@catt.ncsu.edu

Junior.... that explains EVERYTHING! :) <-- Notice the smiley!!!!!

                 Mark Tompsett

--
I have a .plan, I have a .project, but a .sig have I not.
This may look like one but it isn't. Hey, if you're REALLY bored.
'talk' to me, 'mail' me, or just 'finger' me.
mtompset@descartes.uwaterloo.ca
From: ccaajmf@ucl.ac.uk (John Franks)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Nice Guys?
Date: 14 Sep 92 13:42:54 GMT
Organization: Bloomsbury Computing Consortium, London

mtompset@undergrad.math.waterloo.edu (Mark Tompsett) writes:
>In article <1992Sep13.123708.2937@wetware.com> diana@wetware.com (CatWoman ) writes:
>>Most people who ARE successful use a rather shot-gun approach
>>to dating - rather like buying a new car - you don't set your
>>sights on a Ferrarri and ONLY a Ferrarri unless you can afford
>>it.  Those of us who are on the normal budget have a general
>>idea of the kind of car we want - then we test-drive all the
>>cars of that type and find the one we like BEST.  
>
>Great! Now we have social "value" added as a complication to the social "game".
>Well, put me down for $0.02... :(

Dead right. I'm not sure it's meant to be as bad as it seems, but when I read
this paragraph (in context), there came an (instinctive) "yuck". I guess I can
see what it's saying, but it's just horrible; if that's true, what's the 
point?


John Franks             I will arise and go now, for always night and day
ccaajmf@ucl.ac.uk       I hear lake water lapping with low sounds by the shore; 
& jmf14@phx.cam.ac.uk   While I stand on the roadway, or on the pavements grey,
   from Cambridge only  I hear it in the deep heart's core.
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: michael@gandalf.moria (Michael Haardt)
Subject: The "romantic tree" looks for a place in the RFA (was Re: SO met ...)
Reply-To: u31b3hs@pool.informatik.rwth-aachen.de (Michael Haardt)
Organization: An old and gray machine, somewhere in Moria.
Date: Wed, 09 Sep 92 22:03:39 +0100

In article <1992Sep8.063434.10664@leela.cs.orst.edu>, caldwem@jacobs.CS.ORST.EDU (Twiggs) writes:
> usenet@inesc.pt (USENET News System) writes:
> [a wonderful article about our first meeting]

I should have known it, if I decide to write a followup, you already did
so 11 hours ago.  Perhaps I just should write "Check my love's article
for the contents, I only want to express that I agree" ;-))

After describing our day in the park in one of the previous articles and
now that wonderful first meeting, does that qualify for an application to 
the RFA? :-)  The "romantic tree" looks for a romantic place :-)) I hope
nobody decides to use it for a fire ... perhaps that tree needs 
something special from the good romantic witch of the RFA ...

Julie, Lisa, Michelle, how are our chances to join the RFA? :-) *holds
Twiggs' hand and looks hopefully at the president*

Michael "root of the romantic tree"
--
Twiggs and root are a wonderful tree (tm) Twiggs and root in #ourhome :-)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: petitc@vccsouth10.its.rpi.edu (Christopher Jon Petit)
Subject: Re: When Magic Dies
Reply-To: petitc@rpi.edu
Organization: Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute, Troy, NY.
Date: Wed, 9 Sep 1992 04:30:03 GMT

In article <1992Sep9.034208.26751@athena.mit.edu>, krpeters@athena.mit.edu (Karl R Peters) writes:
|> 
|> Kinda reminds me of Terry Pratchett's reasoning as to why male magicians
|> don't need women. :-)

  Well, I heard this one quote that seems appropiate:

 "It's not the size of the wand, but the magic in the stick." :&)

-- 
Trust:  A very precious social commodity, due both to high value and terrible
scarcity.
MATWDTM:  Mothers Against Teenagers Who Drink Too Much (failed name for MADD)




Newsgroups: alt.romance,alt.sex,alt.sex.bondage
From: justin@aix3090b.uky.edu (Justin P Sullivan)
Subject: Re: Fuck You
Keywords: bizarre posts
    <1992Sep6.021100.16817@athena.cs.uga.edu>      
    <92Sep07.002821.14472@acs.ucalgary.ca> <rsvanc00.715834161@mik.uky.edu>
Organization: University Of Kentucky, Dept. of Math Sciences
Distribution: alt.romance,alt.sex,alt.sex.bondage
Date: Mon, 7 Sep 1992 23:54:38 GMT

rsvanc00@mik.uky.edu (Randolph S. Vance) writes:

>In <92Sep07.002821.14472@acs.ucalgary.ca> panlilio@acs.ucalgary.ca (Victor P. Panlilio) writes:
>>And if so, should we send the Net.Police after him? Comments?

>Absolutely. Jeff Spangenberg has inexcusably crossed the line
>between flame wars here by inciting other Skinhead Neo-Nazi
>ass-souls like himself to start race wars.

I told you so! You gotta watch for them slow-witted Yankees..
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: petitc@nuge104.its.rpi.edu (Christopher Jon Petit)
Subject: Re: SO met through the computer. Anyone else ?
Reply-To: petitc@rpi.edu
Organization: Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute, Troy, NY.
Date: Mon, 14 Sep 1992 19:53:43 GMT

In article <BuL1vs.9D6@csugrad.cs.vt.edu>, jaker@csugrad.cs.vt.edu (Jake Rose) writes:
|> petitc@nuge104.its.rpi.edu (Christopher Jon Petit) writes:
|> 
|> >  One question:  How in the world can you fall in Love when you haven't even
|> >seen the person yet?
|> 
|> I did.  It's not hard.  We talked on the phone, via echat, MUSHes, etcetera,
|> for two months before she mailed her photo to me... ...it's not hard if you
|> care about who the person is instead of what they are - hey, I thought you
|> were a "nice guy"! :)
|> 
  Well, I'm realistic.  What if someone is a truly wonderful person, but you
find the person totally unattractive?  Are you supposed to just ignore the
fact that there's no attraction there?  Or, are we going off on the "appearance
shouldn't matter if you REALLY love someone" stuff again?

  I guess that the only way appearance can't matter is if you're blind.  :&)

-- 
Trust:  A very precious social commodity, due both to high value and terrible
scarcity.
MATWDTM:  Mothers Against Teenagers Who Drink Too Much (failed name for MADD)
From: robinsonm@clvax1.cl.msu.edu (Mike Robinson)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Friendship first: Good idea or lost cause???
Date: 15 Sep 92 22:05:09 GMT
Reply-To: robinsonm@clvax1.cl.msu.edu
Organization: NASA Goddard Space Flight Center - Greenbelt, MD, USA
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.3-4

How-dee!
   After many lurkings, I have surfaced.  Now, I am a firm 
believer in the concept that one needs friendship in order to 
build a stable relationship that will hopefully last longer than 
it takes to pull off the condom and become unconscious, being 
that my previous relationships turned to sex rather quickly and 
could not last.
   Now there seems to be a problem with this, at least as far as 
my experience goes.  It seems to me that by the time you do 
establish such a friendship, the woman does not want to go any 
further for fear of destroying the friendship.  How can one get 
around this?  Can one get around this?  Should I just walk up to 
strange women and say "Nice shoes, wanna fuck?!?"
   Just one of those paradoxes I have thought about whilst 
wandering the desert of celibacy for the past 2.5 years.

* Robinson

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Michael A. Robinson      | "Oh my beloved ice cream bar, how I love to lick |
| English Department       | your creamy center."                             |
| Michigan State University|    -- Ren, "Space Madness"                       |
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: tdbear@tandon.com (Tom Barrett)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re:  Love
Date: 4 Sep 92 00:02:54 GMT
Organization: Silent Radio, Los Angeles (forwarded)

In article <1992Sep1.003337.18158@tandon.com> you write:
>Oh, I'm sure it does... often though, my lovers simply don't
>live up to ALL of my expectations.  They might satisfy my
>intellectual needs, my social needs, my cuddling needs, my
>sexual needs, etc., but maybe not ALL of those in one person.

To answer your question... no.  You (we) will *never* have all your needs met
in one person and an attempt to do that will result in very unrealistic
expectations that will. at best, create a large degree of uncomfort for you
and your SO or more likely, will destroy the relationship.  It simply doesn't
work that way and the sooner people realize this, the better off they'll be.
This is one important reason to have friends.  To meet different needs.

And this is not just my opinion.  There's been lots written about this.
Any bookstore would have numbers of books concerning this. 

David S.


-- 
Tom Barrett (TDBear)    tdbear@tandon.com          voice: 805-378-6207
Tandon Corporation      609 Science Drive          Moorpark, CA  93021 
Sr. HW Design Engineer  "War is Peace, No is Yes, And We're All Free!" 
-=>NOTE:  The feed to tdbear@tandon.com may be interrupted in Sept.<=-
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: dkl@xcluud.sccsi.com (David Karl Leikam)
Subject: Re: SO met through the computer. Anyone else ?
Organization: Greater Montrose UFO Appreciation Society & Data Haven
Distribution: alt
Date: Wed, 9 Sep 1992 19:30:23 GMT

In article <1992Sep7.162520.16265@inesc.pt> usenet@inesc.pt (USENET News System) writes:
>
>		Is there anyone else out there who met his/her SO through the
>	computer ? It would be fun to hear similar cases.
>
 
    It's pretty common, actually. There are several long-term couples,
some married, some not, among my friends/acquaintances, who've met via
modem first.  Never happened to me (never worked out, that is), but it
does happen for other people.  I can think of four sets off the top of
my head.
From: weaver@jetsun.weitek.COM (Michael Gordon Weaver)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: It hurts like hell
Date: 5 Sep 92 00:28:43 GMT
Organization: WEITEK Corporation, Sunnyvale CA

In article <Bu24HB.I7K@cs.psu.edu> so@cobol.cs.psu.edu (Nicol C So) writes:
>It hurts like hell!
>
Sorry to hear that.

>For the last couple of days I've not been able to do any useful working,
>all because of a relationship which has been over for some time.  I talked
>and talked with friends trying to relieve the pain that's hurting me deep
>inside my heart.  My friends keep telling me that it's over, and I should
>just move forward.  "Yes, I know," I said, "but the pain is very real."
>
Your friends mean well, but they are not addressing your needs. Externally,
in action, you need to move forward. But internally, you need to understand
what is missing.

>Years back, when I read about Maslow's pyramid of human needs, I thought
>"Lucky that although human beings have needs, there are something that could
>satisfy them.  How terrible it would be if a man can crave for something
>that doesn't even exist!"  I stopped thinking about it, because the mere
>possibility of the situation terrifies me.
>
As I understand it (from memory of reading second hand), Maslow said that
very few individuals (the self-actualized) could worry about 'higher'
needs, while the rest of us are trying to fufil basic needs. Rather
like karma, re-incarnation, and nirvana. The word need is perhaps
misleading. I say I need oxygen, and you should believe that I will
die within minutes if I don't have it. I say I need self-esteem,
but no-one will believe that I will shortly expire without it.
You don't have to be afraid about unmet needs. You can put up with
them, just as you can put up with being tired, being hungry, or 
being sore.

>Now I know that it is not just a possibility, it actually occurs.  When
>a relationship is broken, people have changed, you know a dream has vanished
>and the good old days are gone.  But when every little thing in life
>reminds you of a past that cease to exist, and when you keep hoping for
>the impossible, life is just plain miserable.
>
We all crave for things that don't exist. We want things to be perfect,
for instance.  We want world peace. We want unconditional love.

You have lost something that filled some need. You cannot replace that
something, but you can still fill that need. Your mind tells you you
need this relationship, this person, this dream, but that is an
illusion. Your mind tells you that you cannot go one minute without
them, but that is an illusion.

>God, if you are listening out there, will you deliever me from this desperate
>situation, will you?
>
You were (metaphorically) in a warm, safe womb of a relationship (or
maybe a dream of one), and now you are delivered kicking and screaming
in the the cold light of day. It will take time, but you will get used
to it. And you will learn to make for yourself what you thought had to
be given to you. Time may seem to torture you now, but it is your
friend. You need time to grow out of your problem.

Peace,
Michael.
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: bnolte@herky.cs.uiowa.edu (Bill Nolte)
Subject: Re: LJBF??
Date: Tue, 15 Sep 1992 18:11:49 GMT
Organization: University of Iowa, Iowa City, IA, USA

From article <1992Sep12.112230.9455@bsu-ucs.uucp>, by 01ksdavis@bsu-ucs.uucp:
> 
> 	BTW, what does LJBF mean?  I mean if we all start using acrononyms, we
> could get in big trouble from are SOs and put on KP.
> 
> 
> 		Kyle

It is that evil phrase "let's just be friends."

Makes me shiver.
Bill
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: ae498@yfn.ysu.edu (Dawn Bott)
Subject: Re: IRC (was Re: SO met through the computer. Anyone else ?)
Reply-To: ae498@yfn.ysu.edu (Dawn Bott)
Organization: St. Elizabeth Hospital, Youngstown, OH
Date: Wed, 9 Sep 1992 17:59:54 GMT


In a previous article, zaidioa@HYDRA.ROSE-HULMAN.EDU (Omar A. Zaidi) says:

>	My SO and I met as a result of this group.

         [happy story delete to save band-width =)]

and then he adds:

>For those skeptics who think these things can't work. Jennifer and I have never
>even once had an arguement or a fight. EVERY decision we made was by consensus
>and it's so nice at long last to have a relationship where things are equal.
>
>
I am always happy to hear computer love stories..it reaffirms the great 
belief i have in mine =)....BUT... i have to contend with Omar's above
statement.

My RP argue nearly every day...both on the comps, on the phone, and 
while he was here for 6 weeks....  We are both very stubborn, at
times hardheaded, and as different as we are alike.  He thinks things
through on a logical level..if you can't see it..or prove it..he
doesn't want to believe it..  I know if i "feel" it..i believe it.
He is English and i am American... Needless to add we find things to
butt heads on all the time..

but personally, I wouldn't have it any other way... It's not
like we take cheap shots when we argue...we *usually* stick only
to the topic under fire...and neither of us stays mad for 
long or holds grudges..

I wouldn't want to be with someone who agreed with me on everything
or let me always have my way...and although i am sure that Omar
didn't necessarily mean complete agreement on all things..

I *personally* have found that discord is what helps keep a 
relationship alive, growing and exciting..

I have learned alot from the arguements i have had with my RP,
and while this might not be the preferred style of everyone..

to say that "we never argue"  isn't necessarily guaranteeing
a happy relationship....

have fun and take care!



-- 
Irony is hygiene of the mind      --Elizabeth Bibesco
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: charon@diana.cair.du.edu (Chuck)
Subject: More "nice guy"/asshole stuff
Organization: University of Denver, Denver, Colorado
Date: Tue, 15 Sep 92 23:44:48 GMT

  Ok...It's time for me to speak up on behalf of SOME of the "nice
guys" out there.

  1) Addressing the Idea of nice guys being jealous  Therefore    
     other guys are assholes:
      
     I find out the guys are assholes, because that is what the
     women who are seeing tell me.

     I have this female friend who complains to me about what an
     asshole her current SO is. AND...this the same woman who
     called me a "nice guy", and who wouldn't even give me a 
     chance....   And that's what pisses me off...When a woman
     won't give me a chance, and then later turns around and 
     bitches to me about her Current SO.

    

   2)  Contrary to popular belief you can be a "nice guy" and also 
       be assertive.  There seems to be a "nice guy" stereotype out
       there.  What I have seen happen is that a guy will 
       exhibit some "nice guy" traits...This signals the woman's
       red flag to go up...  And she says to herself "Ah-Oh,  'nice
       guy' time to go on the next."  and she move on withoutreally
       taking the time to get to know him in the first place.
       And now she may never find out who he really is.

       It's to the point now that a man can't even resemble
       niceness, or he might be mistaken for a boring doormat
       of a "nice guy."

******************************************************************
NOTE:  To all you Women out there:  this is not to be taken as
       as slam.  As I know that not ALL women are the same.
Newsgroups: alt.romance