From: exukev@exu.ericsson.se (Kevin Autrey)
Newsgroups: soc.motss
Subject: Now is the time
Date: 13 Oct 92 19:12:48 GMT
Organization: Ericsson Network Systems
X-Disclaimer: This article was posted by a user at Ericsson.
              The opinions expressed are strictly those of the
              user and not necessarily those of Ericsson.

In article <5383@rosie.NeXT.COM> (Lee Tucker) ltucker@next.com writes:

[much good stuff deleted]

>Why out myself?   If I can do for one other person what was done for  
>me, then it will be worth it.   This isn't about confrontation, its  
>about caring.  It is about showing others that their stereotypes don't  
>hold up.   It's about allowing other people to consider things about  
>themselves that they believe too terrible to contemplate.

This is as good a reason to be out as there is.  Sure, it feels
*great* to be honest with yourself - to accept yourself - to love
yourself.  But if we can't help someone else to accept being gay in
the same positive, self-loving manner as we have accepted *our* being
gay, then the whole coming out experience rings a little hollow.

Lee's post kind of crystalized some thoughts that I've been having
lately relating to how awful those pre-coming out days are, about just
how hateful we can be towards ourselves, and about how much *I*
absolutely gained from meeting and knowing and befriending and coming
out to an openly-gay guy that I worked with at the age of 25.  A guy
that I call one of my very best friends today.  I've been feeling the
need to give something back to the community - to reinvest the
benefits and rewards that I've reaped for the past almost-three years.

To all those people -

  who are reading this group with the office/dorm/bedroom door closed 
  and one finger poised over the key which will blank the screen or
  otherwise remove all evidence of this group from plain view -

  who wake up every morning and perform a little Mental Inventory of
  their sexual desires and fantasies and hate themselves for the fact 
  that The Feelings (of being gay) are still there -

  who fear that if they were found out, they would lose every friend
  they hold dear - 

  who have never ever uttered the unmentionable words "I'm gay" to
  another living, breathing soul -

  who have never ever uttered the unmentionable words "I'm gay" to 
  themselves, even though they know it to be so -

  who are right there at the end of their mental road, unable to
  imagine going on living a life that might entail being gay -

Find SOMEONE to tell it to.  If it's the only way, write to someone
gay on the net that you like/respect/identify with what they have to
say.  There are a LOT of people in this group who are willing to talk
to you - who will be willing to relate their coming out experience and
amaze you in the fact that the same feelings you have now, they once
had - who will tell you that it's NOT the end of the world because you
might be gay - who will assure you that you're not evil and worthless
because you might be gay - who will dispel your fears that you're
being gay stands in the way of ANYTHING you want to accomplish in your
life.

Take the first step.  You owe it to yourself to do it - and we owe it
to ourselves to be there when you do.  Take the first step.  It's a
small first step, but every other step you will take in your life will
pale in comparison.  Take the first step.

Now is the time.

Kevin
________ _________________________________________________________________
\      /                                       | Ericsson Network Systems
 \  Kevin Autrey                               | P.O. Box 833875 - MS L-04
  \  /            wk: exukev@exu.ericsson.se   | Richardson, TX 75083-3875
   \/             hm: kevin@batpc.lonestar.org | Phone: (214) 997-6865
Newsgroups: soc.motss