HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: al037@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (Dave Polewka)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Somalia
Date: 16 Dec 1992 05:45:55 GMT
Organization: Case Western Reserve University, Cleveland, OH (USA)
Reply-To: al037@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (Dave Polewka)
NNTP-Posting-Host: slc10.ins.cwru.edu


In a previous article, bhoughto@sedona.intel.com (Blair P. Houghton) says:
                       ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
> kaldis@romulus.rutgers.edu (Theodore A. Kaldis) writes:
  ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
 bhoughto@sedona.intel.com -- anagram (@=a)
*******************************************
   CNN: "Somalia ought to be hoed!!"
*******************************************

 kaldis@romulus.rutgers.edu -- anagram (@=a)
********************************************
   U.S. rule:  Somalia, Kurds trudge.
********************************************
-- 
=======================
"Endeavor to persevere"
=======================
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: wjm@feenix.metronet.com (Bill Middleton)
Subject: Re: hey.  have you people improved the quality of your posts yet?
Organization: Texas Metronet Communications Services, Dallas TX
Date: Mon, 14 Dec 1992 07:18:48 GMT

In article <1992Dec13.000110.28408@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> pfinerty@nyx.cs.du.edu (fun fun fun boy) writes:
>In article <Bz59IE.Dx5@feenix.metronet.com> wjm@decster.uta.edu writes:
>>
>>got me a brand new killfile...
>
>	did you have a point? i didn't think so. bye bye.

i was showing off, bonehead.

-- 
bILL
If you're ever around when somebody dies, look up
and wave.  They'll get a big kick out of it.. -   Woody Guthrie
From: dsc3jfs@nmrdc1.nmrdc.nnmc.navy.mil (Jim Small)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Productivity advantages that make an office better than a cubicle
Date: 16 Dec 92 18:04:17 GMT
Organization: Naval Medical Research & Development Command

In article <waterman.724447053@chaos.cs.brandeis.edu> waterman@cs.brandeis.edu writes:
>mjd@saul.cis.upenn.edu ("[]") writes:
>>In article <1992Dec11.081342.18108@wetware.com> billbill@wetware.com (Bill Bill) writes:
>>>   No one notices that you must chant "Piece of shit" twice
>>>   before your fingers assent to remember the correct compiler flag.
>Ahh -- the song of Joy.  Music to my ear.
>Many distinct variations have been developed over the years,
>but the main them is always distinguishable.
>>``GODDAM FUCKING SHITSACK FUCKING X WINDOWS [*]''
>>``What's wrong with it?''
>>``What ISN'T wrong with it?''
>>That usually stumps them right there.
>It still works some of the time.  I've stopped complaining all too heavily,
>and just started working on replacing it from within.
>>I love my work.
>Of course.  Why else would you rant about it so?


Ah, another happy 3B2 user


-- 
I hate the 3B2
The 3B2 can bite me.
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: dave@snitor.sni.ca (Dave Till)
Subject: immortal dialogue
Organization: no
Date: Fri, 11 Dec 1992 19:03:16 GMT

From *Murder Has Your Number* by Hugh Garner, published in 1978:

"No, I guess it's better that you should marry your current boy friend
and go and raise a family out in Etobicoke or Mississauga or some other
overpriced new suburb.  Come to think of it you're too much of a woman
and too beautiful, even without make-up, to do anything else."

"Thanks, Inspector."

--Dave "NOT ONE WORD HAS BEEN OMITTED" Till
  e-mail address:  dave@silver.sni.ca or dave@snitor.uucp
From: operjfw@NeXTwork.Rose-Hulman.Edu (Waldby)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Another World
Date: 15 Dec 1992 03:18:39 GMT
Organization: Computer Science Department at Rose-Hulman
Reply-To: operjfw@nextwork.rose-hulman.edu
NNTP-Posting-Host: g310b12.nextwork.rose-hulman.edu

Posting bitter seek anarchy
Flee the storming enemy
Fallen star hangs by night
Pull me up into the light
Twist my arm make me see red
Break my legs kick my head
From behind comes friendly fire
Reach my arm just an inch higher
Pull the lever, release the sun
Lasers coming but I cannot run

What can I do?
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: boutell@isis.cshl.org (Tom Boutell)
Subject: Re: what I really want to do
Organization: Cold Spring Harbor Labs
Date: Tue, 15 Dec 1992 01:06:48 GMT

In article <tjqi6k8@zola.esd.sgi.com> cj@sgi.com (C J Silverio) writes:
>---
>I want to quit the computer industry.
>I want to move to a commune in the Sierra foothills.
>I want to write fiction instead of manuals for illiterate programmers.  
>I want to have enough of a yard to grow a kitchen garden.
>I want to have children who don't know what television is.
>I want to look up at night & see stars instead of the glare from
>  military sites near me.

I want to do all of the above, only I want to do it in New York City.
(Yes, this includes items #2 and #6. We're talking wants here,
not possibilities. Hell, I also want to not have children. 
Very well then, I contradict myself, very well then,
I contradict physics...)

>c j silverio
>hopeless

-T

Hopeless, with that grungy urban yummy at the edges

(Gotta have rooftops to yawp from, ya know)



-- 
Tom Boutell, boutell@cshl.org

Clausthaler is the best non - alcoholic beer in the known universe.
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: aaron@atlantis.uucp
Subject: I just gots to know.
Reply-To: aaron%atlantis@kakwa.ucs.ualberta.ca
Organization: Atlantis Communications, Edmonton, AB, Canada
X-Newsreader: TIN [version 1.1 PL7]
Date: Thu, 17 Dec 1992 15:39:48 GMT

Why is it that cj's name is sometimes "C J Silverio" and other times
"C.J. Silverio"?

-- 
---Alfvaen(Still looking for "October's Baby")
"I never gave it a thought, I never thought I should think                       I would go along with anyone and anything"  --Rupert Hine
Current Album--Thomas Dolby:Aliens Ate My Buick
Current Read--Michael Coney:Charisma
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: rigler@dao.nrc.ca (Michael Rigler)
Subject: Sioux Haiku
Summary: What can I say?  I'm just a horndog...
Reply-To: rigler@dao.nrc.ca
Organization: DAO/CADC .
Date: Fri, 11 Dec 92 20:24:53 GMT

ssamaras@scott.skidmore.edu (susan samarasinghe) writes:
>
>   thank you. you have made me happy....i smile now.
				sioux....

I must make my bid, before it is too late.  *Ahem*

Young new-bile,

   blushing nudibranch
   writhing and twisting for me
   my sling spear skewers

   where is your mother?
   piteous wildebeast calf
   lions drag you down

   read my destiny
   steamy coilings in the snow
   your intestines spill

   KAW! KAW! Ki-Ki-KAWWW!!!
   urinate before me, for
   I AM THE FINCH MAN!!!

That's all I wanted to say.  Carry on.

---
Michael      "I'm basically a colossal pervert.  No known form
Rigler        of depravity is beneath me.  Animal, vegetable or
              mineral:  I'll DO anything TO anything."
                     --The Baby-Eating Bishop of Bath 'n' Gate

Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: hamlet@ravel.udel.edu (Chris Adams)
Subject: quotation looking for a context
Organization: University of Delaware
Date: Sat, 12 Dec 1992 01:20:04 GMT

my first thought was the cat.
From: reese@vax.oxford.ac.uk
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Insult to Injury
Date: 14 Dec 92 17:34:44 GMT
Organization: Oxford University VAX 6620

In article <1992Dec9.204555.29933@murdoch.acc.Virginia.EDU>, carasso@Turing.ORG (Roger Carasso) writes:
> 
> My girlfriend is from Ohio.
> Toledo, Ohio.

Did you steel her, as a fine young blade should do?

Jason
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: ssamaras@scott.skidmore.edu (susan samarasinghe)
Subject: Re: March of the Newbies
Organization: Skidmore College, Saratoga Springs NY
Date: Sun, 13 Dec 1992 22:12:24 GMT





   how creative you all are! i'm quite sure that you've given the
idea of livestock copulating *much* more thought than i have...that's
okay....i am a "newbie", and therefore incapable of rational thought
or intelligent conversation. that's just fine....but please read my
post SWANSONG before you all go ballistic with more nasty comments
about my parents and my sex life. the fact that i have been known to
glance just a trifle too longingly at a horse's well formed and
rippling musculature means nothing...nothing...!

			is a horse considered livestock?

						sioux
From: an072@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (Richard White)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: pop quiz
Date: 15 Dec 1992 17:14:01 GMT
Organization: Case Western Reserve University, Cleveland, OH (USA)
Reply-To: rpwhite@taurus.cs.nps.navy.mil (rpwhite)
NNTP-Posting-Host: hela.ins.cwru.edu


In a previous article, cj@eno.esd.sgi.com (C J Silverio) says:

>How many first-line managers are there at SGI?
>How many of them are women?

This reminds me of the last time the San Jose Mercury News did it
special supplement on the top 100 executives in Silicon Valley.

I was almost through it when it dawned on me that there were no babes 
in it.

rp -- no blacks either, now that you mention it.
From: jws5@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu (JUSTIN WINSLOW SOLONYNKA)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: In Search Of
Date: 17 Dec 92 15:50:37 GMT
Organization: Lehigh University

In article <1gp0a6INNsdf@master.cs.rose-hulman.edu>, operjfw@NeXTwork.Rose-Hulma
n.Edu (Waldby) writes:
>In article <1992Dec17.012959.29616@athena.mit.edu> dschmidt@athena.mit.edu
>(Dan Schmidt) writes:
>>I was trying to think of the most long-winded sentence in a pop
>>song.  Strings such as the Police'
>>"I can't, I can't, I can't stand losing, I can't, I can't, I can't
>> stand losing, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't stand losing you"
>>
>>   "Ever fallen in love with someone, ever fallen in love, in love with
>>   someone, ever fallen in love, in love with someone you shouldn't have
>>   fallen in love with, fallen in love with, ever fallen in love with
>>   someone you shouldn't have fallen in love with?"
>>

How about Edie Brickell:
    "What I am is what I am are you what you are or what what I am is what I
    am are you what you are or what you are is what I am is what I am is what
    you are or... what."

Not as long, but more ridiculous.

sol  |  See the cat?  See the cradle?
-- 
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: aankrom@nyx.cs.du.edu (Anthony Ankrom)
Subject: Re: Leary, Manson, Kleps and other questions...
X-Disclaimer: Nyx is a public access Unix system run by the University
	of Denver for the Denver community.  The University has neither
	control over nor responsibility for the opinions of users.
Organization: Nyx, Public Access Unix at U. of Denver Math/CS dept.
Date: Fri, 18 Dec 92 05:00:51 GMT

In article <tjrdnt8@zola.esd.sgi.com> cj@sgi.com writes:
>
>In article <1gep30INN54c@tamsun.tamu.edu>, bpb9204@tamsun.tamu.edu write
:
>|Who is Tim Leary?  
>
>Timothy Leary's dead.
>
>---
>C J Silverio	cj@sgi.com	ceej@well.sf.ca.us
>since no one else said it


 No he's not... yet...

St. Anthony, Victor Kiam's love-child.

--
          / N \   O                   Mi vsi smo krizhani,
         |   \ |  || Ph               chlani izbrani
         |   | |_O-C-C-OH             mesarskega ceha...
BZ        \ / /      Ph                            aankrom@nyx.cs.du.edu
From: mjd@saul.cis.upenn.edu ("[*] Angel of Wax")
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: cathy's response to sioux's dildo
Date: 15 Dec 92 17:03:41 GMT
	<BzB2p6.H7@tegra.com> <1992Dec15.161401.2260@wam.umd.edu>
Organization: Eaters of Wisdom
In-reply-to: kimy@wam.umd.edu's message of 15 Dec 92 16:14:01 GMT

In article <1992Dec15.161401.2260@wam.umd.edu> kimy@wam.umd.edu (Yong-Mi Kim) writes:
>   I thought mjd looked remarkably like a Hasidic Jew wearing that black
>   hat with the big black flowers attached. 

Ho ho!  Yes, the only Hassid in the world with a penis ring.

     I bet the resemblance isn't so strong now that I have a goatee
instead of a real beard.
--
                     'Bah!' said Scrooge, 'Humbug!'
 Mark-Jason Dominus 	  			    mjd@central.cis.upenn.edu
From: operjfw@NeXTwork.Rose-Hulman.Edu (Waldby)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: there is nothing at all in all of the world
Date: 15 Dec 1992 03:24:05 GMT
Organization: Computer Science Department at Rose-Hulman
Distribution: world
Reply-To: operjfw@nextwork.rose-hulman.edu
NNTP-Posting-Host: g310b12.nextwork.rose-hulman.edu

In article <1gjce3INN3qe@agate.berkeley.edu> curtis@cs.berkeley.edu  
(Curtis Yarvin) writes:
> shaped quite like
> 
> a persimmon seed.
> 
> c

I'm afraid I must disagree. There are millions of persimmon
seeds in the world.

Up your ante:

there is nothing at all in all of the world

like a free lunch
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: carasso@Turing.ORG (Roger Carasso)
Subject: ALT.PERSONALS ADVENTURE GAME
Organization: The Turing Project, Public Access Internet Host
Date: Fri, 18 Dec 1992 02:38:02 GMT

in alt.personals,alt.personals.ads,alt.personals.misc,
jps8@po.CWRU.Edu (James P. Schwonek) writes:

)Dear Beloved:
)
)Whatever you impress upon your subconscious mind will be experienced
)in your world.  Begin now to impress your subconscious mind with
)the qualities and characteristics you desire in a woman.
)
)Sit down at night, close your eyes, let go, relax the body, become 
)very quiet, passive, and receptive.  Talk to your subconscious mind
)and say to it, "I am now attracting a woman into my experience who is
)honest, sincere, loyal, faithful, peaceful, happy, and prosperous. 
)These qualities which I admire are sinking down into my subconscious
)mind now.  As I dwell upon these characteristics, they become a part 
)of me and are embodied subconsciously
)
)I know there is an irresistible law of attraction and that I attract 
)to me a woman according to my subconscious belief.  I attract that
)which I feel to be true in my subconscious mind.
)
)I know I can contribute to her peace and happiness.  She loves my
)ideals,
)and I love her ideals.  There is mutual love, freedom, and respect.
)
)I now attract the right woman who is in complete accord with me.  This
)is a
)spiritual union because it is divine love functioning through the
)personality
)of someone with whom I blend perfectly.  I know I can give to this woman
)love, light peace, and joy.  I feel and believe I can make this 
)woman's life full, complete, and wonderful.
)
)I now decree that she possesses the following qualities and attributes:
)She is spiritual, loyal, faithful, and true.  She is harmonious,
)peaceful,
)and happy.  We are irresistibly attracted to each other.  Only that
)which 
)belongs to love, truth, and beauty can enter my experience.  I accept
)my ideal companion now.
)
)People find happiness by dwelling on the eternal truths of God and the 
)spiritual values of life.  Then, the man and woman can contribute to 
)each other's happiness and joy.
)
)You attract the right mate by dwelling on the qualities and
)characteristics
)you admire in a woman or a man, and then your subconscious mind will
)bring 
)you together in divine order.
)
)I promise to cherish, love, and honor her all the days of my life.
)
)Love, 
)
)Jim


>go east
You see big lovable sappy Jim.  He is writing a love poem.
There is also a door with a round key hole.

>inventory
You have an axe.

>kill jim
With what?

>kill jim with axe.
You make a mighty swing at jim with the axe, and slice him in half.

>swing axe at jim's head.
You make a might swing at jim's head with the axe, slicing it in half.

>get eyeballs.
You have Jim's eyeballs.

>Put eyeballs into round key hole.
The eyeballs slide in and you hear a clicking noise.

>Open door.
You enter a room fulled with 1000 nude 16 year old girls, and more
sexual devices and food then you have ever seen.  You lucky bastard.

End of Journey Reached
Game over.




carasso, "it could happen"
...
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: gary@sci34hub.sci.com (Gary Heston)
Subject: Re: And Still the Moon
Reply-To: gary@sci34hub.sci.com (Gary Heston)
Organization: SCI Systems, Inc., Huntsville, Al.
Date: Mon, 14 Dec 1992 19:54:31 GMT

In article <1992Dec14.003717.63509@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu> jws5@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu (JUSTIN WINSLOW SOLONYNKA) writes:
>In article <1992Dec11.092154.6646@spider.co.uk>, andrewc@spider.co.uk (Andrew Cannon) writes:

>> .....  I wanted to be

>>A Lumberjack !

>Note the reference to Monty Python.  Nothing arcane about it.

There is a song playing in Nashville now, called "The Lumberjack Song".

It has *nothing* to do with Python.

It could *easily* be a theme song for Carasso.

The first thing you hear is a chainsaw being started; it is revved in
time with the music throughout the performance.

	"I'll be your lumberjack baby; (bbrrrrmmmmbbrrrrmmm)
	  gonna cut you down to size... (brmmmrrrmmmrrmmm)"

I forget who does it; maybe I can come up with a set of all the lyrics.


-- 
Gary Heston    SCI Systems, Inc.  gary@sci34hub.sci.com   site admin
The Chairman of the Board and the CFO speak for SCI. I'm neither.
"Data sheet: HSN-3000 Nuclear Event Detector. The [NED] senses the gamma
radiation pulse [from a] nuclear weapon." As if we wouldn't notice...
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,soc.culture.arabic
From: carasso@Turing.ORG (Roger Carasso)
Subject: YASSIR
Organization: The Turing Project, Public Access Internet Host
Date: Wed, 16 Dec 1992 01:55:21 GMT


Syrian Deputy President Says Yasser Arafat Lost his Sanity
 
Today's YEDIOT AHRONOT quotes the Italian newspaper "Il-Jiornale"
which published an interview yesterday with Syrian Deputy President
Abdel Halim Hadam, the man considered "number two" in Syria. Hadam
said in the interview that he is convinced that PLO Chief Yasser
Arafat has lost his sanity. "I have the impression, that following
the plane accident, Arafat lost his sanity..." Hadam said that
Arafat's claim that parts of the Golan Heights belong to the
Palestinians constitutes the final proof of his madness.
 

:)

Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: kohli (Mr. Bad Judgment)
Subject: finish this story
Followup-To: talk.bizarre
Summary: a slow afternoon near the arctic circle
Reply-To: kohli@aslmr.med.ge.com (Mr. Bad Judgment)
Organization: Flying Cheesewursts of America
Date: Wed, 16 Dec 92 22:42:36 GMT

the first time i saw the moose in action, i had
no idea where it would lead.  i'd gotten the call from
the Fort Franklin Lab on Great Bear Lake.

this late in the year and this close to the arctic
circle, things darken up pretty early.  i finished
off some VaguelyBeeflikeSubstances as i peered out
over the ice floes in the shallows.

from the lab windows, i could make out the moose
only by their glowing collars which were being used
experimentally to not only identify them via radio
signature, but also by sight.  most of the collars
seemed to be uniformly dull, but the subject's
collar was radiant.  i could make out his rack
and i also noted that his ruff was glistening
darkly.

"what's the story?"

"just watch.  some of the other moose seem to be
drawn to the subject's bright collar.  we're not
sure what happens exactly... we see him go under
for a short period, then SPLOOSH!  The approaching
moose gets sucked under so powerfully that there
is a cannonball effect, and minutes later, he
comes back out."

we watched.  i could see the duller collar of
a moose approaching the subject, and the mystery
moose went under.  we could still see it's movements
under the ice and under the water from the light of
the collar.  (we also had RF tracking, but that
was unnecessary.)  a loud CRACK accompanied a
burst of activity around the target moose as it
got violently sucked under the ice, then a large
reactive wave splooshed upward.

"any idea how he does it?"

"we have it on high-res videodisc-- it looks like
he grabs the target with his teeth, but we're not
sure how he gets the jaws as wide as it looks.  we're
also not sure what he does with the kill under the ice--
the collars deactivate 10-20 minutes after each event.
AND we're not sure how he ends up with so much
blood on the head and neck."

"tranquilizers?"

"ineffective.  the darts seem to hit and dose, but
nothing happens."

Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: jcarroll@ferris.cray.com (Jeff Carroll)
Subject: Re: Leary : : RECENT SIGHTING
Originator: jcarroll@ferris
Organization: Cray Research, Inc.
Distribution: usa
Date: 16 Dec 92 17:58:30 CST



>I'm pretty sure that Leary is not on the WELL. I was there for a long time
>and never saw a single post by Leary. Lots of posts about him though. Why
>don't you try leary@well.sf.ca.us though. Couldn't hurt. The well won't
>let you finger it. Respects user privacy and all.        ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

*plonk*

jkc (Portland isn't the capital of Oregon)

Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: gooley@netcom.com (Mark. Gooley)
Subject: Re: realization
Organization: Netcom - Online Communication Services  (408 241-9760 guest) 
Date: Tue, 15 Dec 1992 17:59:14 GMT

In article <MJD.92Dec15110604@saul.cis.upenn.edu> mjd@saul.cis.upenn.edu ("[*] Angel of Wax") writes:
>In article <1992Dec15.032227.7937@netcom.com> gooley@netcom.com (Mark. Gooley) writes:
>>   What I really need is a Boswell.
>
>Mark., I realize you're not going to like this, and I hope you don't
>take it the wrong way, but Boswell is the literary figure with whom I've
>always most associated you.
>
>What YOU really need is a Johnson.

Yeah, but Boswell got to fuck everything in sight.  He had something like
30 separate doses of the clap in his lifetime.  Occasionally he wore
condoms (decorated with his regimental colors), but usually not.  He
knew more about gleets than Phil Stone.

Sexually I'm more like Johnson.

Otherwise you're probably right.

Mark.
gooley@netcom.com
Xref: sparky talk.bizarre:41877 alt.prose:1658