HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: stuarta@syd.dms.CSIRO.AU (Stuart Andrews)
Subject: Inter-racial relationships. What do you think?
Organization: CSIRO Division of Mathematics and Statistics, Australia
Date: Mon, 12 Oct 1992 09:36:35 GMT

Hi all, a.r seems a bit quiet these past few days, so I'll try a new
topic for discussion.

I have, for as long as I can remember, felt much more attracted to
women of races other than my own. I am white Australian. The women
I find most attractive are Indian, Sri-Lankan, African, Maori, 
Oz Aboriginal etc etc. Even some of the darker Asian people 'tickle
my fancy'.

I haven't actually worked out whether it is colour, or figure/features.
My last girlfriend, of >2 years, was Indian. (she still is actually!)
Colour-wise, her skin is lighter than mine. Her hair though is jet-black
and she has that 'look' that I find so attractive. (Sorry, hard to put
into words).

I live in Sydney, Australia. It is a very multicultural city, people
from all over the world. Somehow, I don't seem to meet a whole lot of
people who fit my persuasion though. Where am I going wrong?

I'd like to 'hear' post from others who enjoy this type of preference.
Anybody lucky enough to enjoy a relationship with someone of a diff
race. Do you have hassles because you are different 'colours'. 
Like Michael Jackson's "Boy is that girl with you? - Yes we're one
and the same" (Black & White)

What is the general feeling in the community towards inter-racial
relationships. Do kids from such parents get a hard time at school?

Talk guys, talk...

G


-- 
Geoffrey Breach                       | "Never ask your murder-suspect client  
(masquerading as stuarta)             |  if they did it. They might answer
AWA Communications. Lane Cove, Sydney |  your question. And then where will
Australia. Voice 61,2 413 6333        |  you be?"  Horace Rumpole, of the Bailey
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
AWA Communications don't know I'm doing this and CSIRO think I'm somebody else
so I'm afraid that the only person responsible for this posting can be me!
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From: marcia@netcom.com (Marcia)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: When guys lose their tempers
Date: 12 Oct 92 21:41:37 GMT
Organization: The Dolphin Conspiracy, Phase II

In article <1992Oct12.073746.18473@nuscc.nus.sg> isc30350@nusunix1.nus.sg (LOW SUET CHENG) writes:
>I have know of guys who when they lose their tempers, hit their
>girlfriends. After that they are remorseful about it, but they tell
>their girlfriends that it's because they (the girlfriend) make them so
>angry that they can't control themselves. Is this really true or is it
>just an excuse?

It's an excuse. People are ultimately responsible for their actions, or they
are a danger to themselves and society and should be taken into protection
for their own safety. Those who use this excuse just don't want to admit to
themselves that they are responsible for what they do.

>Then there are those also who when things go wrong, they'll blame them
>on the girlfriends and say that the girlfriends have distracted them
>from doing their best. Is this valid?

No. Again, it's so easy to blame someone else, but when you come right down
to it, you are the only one responsible for yourself. If the men in question
are so easily distracted, perhaps it's best that they don't have a girlfriend
to distract them so.

-- 
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Marcia Bednarcyk                                  ADDRESSES: marcia@netcom.com
"Sweaty Snugglebunnies."                                     mlb@cisco.com
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: baarniy@iastate.edu (Scott A Coon)
Subject: why the guy?
Followup-To: alt.romance
Summary: who has a problem being friends?
Keywords: call for opinions
Organization: Iowa State University, Ames, IA
Date: Tue, 13 Oct 1992 09:48:15 GMT

Another thread ("How to tell a girl your feelings" I think)
was summarized neatly by "Old, old story of longstanding friends,
one of whom (as usual, the guy) falls in love with the other one."
(I'm sorry I can't give a specific credit, since I've lost it, but
whomever noted this should feel free to wave their hand and say
"Me, me!  It was me!")

So, let's get some analysis of this blanket statement. The questions
of MOTOS being old friends and one getting too involved: in order of
importance/interestingness....

1) Any controversy over it being an "old story" (somehow I doubt it)?

2) IS it "usually" the male?  Or the female?  Or equal?

3) If one sex does have this problem more often, why?

(and even) 

4) Is this a significant social problem that must be addressed by
   the next administration, and if so, can we come up with a strategic
   outline for preventive medicine/cures to submit after the inauguration?

Scott C. 
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: . <@>
Subject: Re: Query
X-Xxmessage-Id: <A704BDC947010B1C@mac3.di.unipi.it>
X-Xxdate: Fri, 16 Oct 92 17: 43:21 GMT
Organization: Department of Computer Science,  Pisa University
X-Useragent: Nuntius v1.1.1d9
Date: Fri, 16 Oct 1992 17:42:51 GMT

In article <1992Oct13.165232.1@vx24.cc.monash.edu.au> ,
eda772dsys@vx24.cc.monash.edu.au writes:
>In article <1992Oct11.040258.23374@monu6.cc.monash.edu.au>, 
>cskksc@yoyo.cc.monash.edu.au (Chung S Khan) writes:
>> In article <1992Oct9.091556.1@emu.insted.unimelb.edu.au> 
>s342063@emu.insted.unimelb.edu.au writes:
>>>In reply to s344021@emu.insted.edu.au :
>>>
>>>I believe that an SO is a "significant other"
>>>
>>>Would someone clarify this please ?
>>>
>>>Hope that helps :)
>
>   To me it would mean Sweet One ;-)
>

To me it stands for "Sexual Object"
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: tyger@netcom.com (Kitty in the Middle)
Subject: Re: When guys lose their tempers
Organization:  I didn't do it, nobody saw me do it, you can't prove anything!
Date: Mon, 12 Oct 1992 19:44:42 GMT

In article <1992Oct12.073746.18473@nuscc.nus.sg> isc30350@nusunix1.nus.sg (LOW SUET CHENG) writes:
>
>I would like to get some views on this topic from the dear people here
>in net.land.
>
>I have know of guys who when they lose their tempers, hit their
>girlfriends. After that they are remorseful about it, but they tell
>their girlfriends that it's because they (the girlfriend) make them so
>angry that they can't control themselves. Is this really true or is it
>just an excuse?

This is half-assed, half-baked steer manure. Any man that hits a woman is one
of the lowest forms of life on the planet. If he can't control his temper any
better than that, he doesn't deserve the female companionship.

>Then there are those also who when things go wrong, they'll blame them
>on the girlfriends and say that the girlfriends have distracted them
>from doing their best. Is this valid?

If you have to ask...

Well, no, IMHO. See above.

>Has anyone here ever encounter this kind of situation personally or seen
>friends who are in this kind of situation? Comments would be very much
>welcomed.

I was in this situation a few years back...it sucked, but it did teach me
to stand up for and defend myself...

>Esther

   Tyger
-- 
      Kristen Kohlbecker    And I would choose to be with you
      tyger@netcom.com      That's if the choice were mine to make   
                            But you can make decisions too
      A Tyger and a Lady    And you can have this heart to break
From: haferman@icaen.uiowa.edu (Jeff Haferman)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: An emerald as an engagement ring?
Date: 11 Oct 92 20:04:12 GMT
Organization: University of Iowa, Iowa City, IA, USA


Question:

  How does this ring "stuff" work?

We were in a jewlery store the other day looking at rings.  An
emerald ring caught here eye.  I must admit I thought it was
very nice - a big clear green emerald with two smallish diamonds
on a gold band.  She said she would rather have that than a
diamond ring as an engagement ring.

What do you think about this?  Will an emerald ring lose its
"appeal" after a while?  I figure I'll just let her think
about it for a few weeks and see how she feels then.

Another question:

Once I get the engagement ring, how do I proceed as far as finding
wedding bands?  I mean, should I get the engagement ring now, and
then in a few months, or a year, or whatever do we go out together
and find the wedding bands?  Sorry, I'm just not familiar with how
this stuff "works".  Feel free to give smart-alecky answers, but
also some good advice would be appreciated.



Jeff Haferman                            internet: haferman@icaen.uiowa.edu
Department of Mechanical Engineering     DoD 0186  BMWMOA 44469  AMA 460140
The University of Iowa
Iowa City, IA  52242                                 '76 R90S
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: bandy@ccs.northeastern.edu (Bandy Chin)
Subject: Re: Multi-lingual list of 'I Love You...'
Keywords: Love, languages.
Organization: College of CS, Northeastern U
Date: Fri, 16 Oct 1992 21:14:35 GMT

In article <Bw2oMn.ExL@news.udel.edu> 09143@ravel.udel.edu (Nemo) writes:
>Hi 'all,
>
>There was a list floating around the net a few months ago which had
>'I Love You' translated into a few dozen languages. For want of a
>better place to ask, I am posting here in the hope that one of the
>a.r readers would have come across it and saved it. Would some kind
>soul please e-mail it to me?
>
>Thanks!
>Vikram
>09143@ravel.udel.edu


Would someone be kind enough to send it to me too?????  Please?

Bandy
From: p00139@psilink.com (Raistlin Majere)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: A Romantic Tale
Date: 11 Oct 92 16:50:59 GMT
Organization: Tower of High Sorcery - Palanthas
X-Mailer: PSILink (3.2)


	There was a story in the paper just yesterday that I felt
compelled to relate here, because it was so very romantic:

	In Kansas, a mailman found a portable cellular phone, $50.00,
and a note in a mailbox. The note contained a list of people and their
phone numbers, and asked the reader of the note to please call each of
the individuals and tell them that the writer of the note was dead. The
reader was instructed to take the $50.00 as a payment for the service.
	
	The mailman took the $50.00 and called the folks on the list.

	Turns out that the note, phone, and $50.00 were left by a couple
that had decided to commit(sp) suicide together. They were elderly, and
aging, and desease was starting to affect both of them, so they decided
to end it together. They both sat on opposite sides of the room and left
all their papers and documents, and then they each shot each other (through
the heart, as I recall). They even went so far as to put down tarps so the
blood wouldn't splatter all over the furniture. They wanted the house to
be left neat and tidy for the relatives to sell.

	I don't know about you, but I just get a romantic tingle down the
ol' spine from that kind of story.........

	Happy Trails, kids.........

*****************************************************************************
		"All is not lost - the unconquerable will,
		 And study of revenge, immortal hate,
	 	 And courage never to submit, or yield -
		 And what is else not to be overcome.
		 That glory never shall his wrath or might
		 Extort from me. To bow and sue for grace,
		 With suppliant knee, and deify his power...."
					Satan, "Paradise Lost"
*****************************************************************************
	      Raistlin Majere @ Tower of High Sorcery - Palanthas
*****************************************************************************
From: damong@manyjars.WPI.EDU (Damon Francis Gentile)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: What to bring on a first date?
Date: 13 Oct 92 03:57:20 GMT
Organization: Worcester Polytechnic Institute
NNTP-Posting-Host: manyjars.wpi.edu

In article <92286.001619MBUTCHER@MIAMIU.BITNET> MBUTCHER@MIAMIU.BITNET writes:
>I have a question for everyone.  I have been out of the dating scene for about
>six years and now I find myself back in there.  My question is What is the
>best thing to bring on a first date?   Thanks for any and all advice.
> 
>Marc Butcher                  

Well, I'd have to start the list with a girl.... followed by a large supply
of cash, because you never know what will happen. I don't think that there
is any specific thing that you need to bring, except a relaxed (and open)
mind

Damon

damong@wpi.wpi.edu
From: jbell@mihi.une.edu.au (Master of Puppets)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: How to tell if you are in love
Date: 12 Oct 1992 22:56:48 -0500
Organization: UTexas Mail-to-News Gateway
NNTP-Posting-Host: cs.utexas.edu

ksdavis@silver.ucs.indiana.edu (Karleenus Schwartz Davis):
> jsteiner@anwsun.phya.utoledo.edu (jason 'Think!' steiner) writes:

>>you're in love when you think you are. it's a mental state, see?

> Righto. . .there's no such thing as 'thinking' that you're in love.
> If you think you are, you are.  But later, when you're not in love
> with this person anymore and you fall in love with someone else,
> it'll feel different, and you'll wonder if you were wrong about
> the first person.  You weren't.  It was love then, but you're done
> with it now, and you'll likely not settle for the same kind of love
> again.  You'll look for something 'better'.  Your standards have
> changed.  That's good; it's the whole point of this insane "dating"
> crap they make us go through.  You're not taking applications, you're
> revising your wish list.  Anyway, love is love, love is a dynamic
> beast, love is never the same twice.  You can't define something that
> is always changing and that isn't the same for any two peoplon earth.


> Cool thing is, every time you're in love, it's the ultimate love so far!

ahhh....who cares?


--
/------------------------jbell@mihi.une.edu.au--------------------------\
| so, understand  |-----Iron Maiden--"Wasted years"-----| | Justin Bell |
| the wasted time always searching for those wasted years |             |
| face up, make your stand |---Iron Maiden? EXCELLENT---| |  +61-67-72  |
| and realise you're living in those golden years         |     6247    |
\-------------90 Taylor St., Armidale, NSW, 2350, AUSTRALIA-------------/
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Bits & pieces..
From: Rob_Tan@kcbbs.gen.nz (Rob Tan)
Date: 12 Oct 92 03:03:39 GMT
Organization: Kappa Crucis Unix BBS, Auckland, New Zealand

>The only advice I could give, is go for it, so to speek.  If you have>truly 
found your special one, then you would be only depriving her, and
>your self of time together.  Plus the fact that if, or if not, you 
>end up together, it would be only right for her to make up her mind 
>weather or not she will wait for you.  And if she says shell wait, 
>and doesn't, its her loss, not yours.

Thanks.. will do after exams.. I think its a bad time to ask during.. 
toomuch of a distraction..

>                good luck, from some one still looking

Good luck yourself..

Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: martini@heaven7.in-berlin.de (Martin P. Ibert)
Subject: Re: Query
Date: Mon, 12 Oct 1992 22:42:45 GMT
Organization: The Seventh Heaven, Berlin, Germany

bena@yoyo.cc.monash.edu.au (Ben Aveling) writes:
> SO	 significant other
> IMO/IMHO In my (Honest) opinon
I know this as "in my humble opinion".
> BRB 	 Be right back - (not that you should ever see this in a post,
> 	 but if you ever `talk' to anyone it might come up.)
Similarly, "SEC" (for "hang on a second")

> What have I missed ?
MOTOS/MOTSS/MOTAS Member of the opposite/same/appropriate sex

and of course dozens of abbrvs for tech words we are 2 lazy 2 type out in full.
-- 
___*___  Martin P. Ibert - Westendallee 100 d, D-1000 Berlin 19 - +4930-3056541
=======  E-mail to martini@{heaven7.{in-berlin.de|sub.org}|cloud9.in-berlin.de}
||| |||  ----------------------------------------------------------------------
||| |||  ------ Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die ------
From: bhchan@soda.berkeley.edu (Billy H. Chan)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Explosions of Nature.
Date: 16 Oct 92 05:30:48 GMT
Organization: U.C. Berkeley, CS Undergraduate Association
NNTP-Posting-Host: soda.berkeley.edu

In article <Bw6CqB.6vF@mentor.cc.purdue.edu> alex@mentor.cc.purdue.edu ( ) writes:
[background deleted]
>In this time, we have come to love one another very much, so 
>much that not being near her hurts to an extreme.  First, I will
>again note that we've only been dating for six months, and sometimes
>I don't think feelings so deep should be present yet, but they are.
Perhaps I'm just young and foolish, but I sincerely hope that such
deep feelings for someone in 6 months isn't 'abnormal', since I got
such feelings for someone in 6 days.
>The net result of this is a massive surge of violent emotions
>which generally manifests itself when no one else is around,
>mainly because I don't want to hurt anyone else.  And so 
>I get these mental pictures of myself in the most destructive
>places possible, the most spectacular explosions.
>
>This happen to anyone else?  Any thoughts?
>                                             -alex
Alex (first, I like to say, nice quote in your sig...fit well with the
post) Yes, it has happen.  For extreme violence, I find myself hiting
inanimate objects alot lately (doors, bulletin boards, closets)  I go
for the inanimate because  the only thing I hurt is myself, and since
it's my action and only I suffer from it, I don't feel as bad.  (I used
to let my anger(?) build up and get into fights in highschool...very
bad for myself, my reputation, and my social life.)  Sometimes, my
head hurts so much from strange headaches (having one right this minute)
that I just want to bang it against the wall and get the pain over with.
(It has been building up like that Aliens explosion).
If you never done it, here's a few ways I usually try to alleviate anger
more less-destructively:
	1) play role-playing games like ADND (no, if you find the right
people to play with, it's no Satanic, or Pagan or anything...it's just
a game, and I'm proud to say that I play it  (over the net, it's easier
to standup for one's beliefs)
	2) Find a gym and just work yourself out...play a hard game of
rachetball and smash the sh*t out of the little blue ball.  Run and feel
the wind benith your wings.  Work out your anger, don't keep it in.  
Remove those excess energy from your body.  Find physical peace (or just
dog-tiredness)
	3) Meditate.  Find mental peace.
Oh, and one more thing, go to church, study the Bible, etc...(oops, or
which ever religion you chose.  I cited mine, but don't want to start
a religious flamewar (sorry))
Anyway, hope that helps.
-- 
----------------------------------------------------------------
Billy H. Chan 	<bhchan@ocf.berkeley.edu>   "Life: a strange new
Just Babbling   <bhchan@soda.berkeley.edu>   state of confusion"
Disclaimer 1:   I'm actually a really nice person. (sorta) :) ;)
From: weaver@jetsun.weitek.COM (Michael Gordon Weaver)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Where do I go from here?
Date: 12 Oct 92 22:57:09 GMT
Organization: WEITEK Corporation, Sunnyvale CA

Greg:

If I understand your posting, it sounds like you have had a few dates 
with this girl last school term, and then saw her a few times during
the summer. You didn't have any understanding between the two of you
but you expected things to move to steady dating when school resumed.
It sounds like when you tried to date this girl, she lost interest.
Yet, when you ignored her, she suddenly got more interested. 

If I am way off on these details, you might as well ignore the rest
of this posting.

What is going on is that when you try too hard to pursue her, she feels
threatened and wants to avoid getting involved. And when you ignore her,
she feels safe and wants to be closer. This is entirely normal
behavior. Everyone has this conflict between the desire for love and
fear of commitment. It sounds like the only thing that has changed
between you two is your estimate of how interested she is in you.

I have two kinds of advice, depending on whether it is more important
that you get along with this girl when you are working together, or
whether it is more important to have a romantic relationship with 
her. So I think you need to make it clear in your own mind which
is more important to you.

If what you want is to get along with this girl when you are working
together, then I think that honesty is a good idea. You will find there
is power in not having secrets. If this is what you want, you can 
find some time alone for just this purpose, and explain the situation
as you see it to her. But I warn you, if you want to restart your romance
this would be a mistake, because if you pursue her after telling her 
about how you feel about her, it will be more likely to set off her
fears of commitment.

Now, if you want a romantic relationship with this girl, you are going
to have to accept that she is not hooked on you yet. You will have to
address both her desire for love and her fear of commitment if you want
to be successful. You want to express well that you enjoy being with
her, find her attractive, admire her, and so forth, but you want to
keep quiet about jealousy and insecurity. Spend as much time as you can
with her, but remember you want to give her times alone when she can
wish you were there. Don't worry about being 'too in love'.  You can
handle it. She isn't going to be scared away by love, only by the
strings that seemed to be attached to it -- dependency, commitment,
jealousy, and so forth.


Peace,
Michael.
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: huesmann@wam.umd.edu (Joseph Edward Huesmann)
Subject: 1001 Ways to Be Romantic
Organization: University of Maryland, College Park
Date: Thu, 15 Oct 1992 10:56:16 GMT

Hello everyone, with everyone wanting to know how to be romantic, I'm
surprised I've not seen mentioned a book by (I think his first name is)
Greg Godek, called "1001 Ways to Be Romantic". There are a lot of good
ideas there, to get you going in a general (or specific) direction, as
related to romance.

Joe

------------------------------------------------------------------------------
|  huesmann@wam.umd.edu     "Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all   |
|  Joseph E. Huesmann        the world, she walks into mine!"                |
|                                              -- Rick Blaine, "Casablanca"  |
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Newsgroups: alt.romance