From: richter@hardy.u.washington.edu (Josef Richter)
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Subject: SchizoSlack Forever Underwater
Date: 15 Oct 92 21:30:19 GMT
Reply-To: richter@u.washington.edu
Organization: University of Washington, Seattle





          ---        SECRETS OF THE CONSPIRACY        ---
                                  
               Latest Update From SchizoSlack Central
                      Tape Transcript #13013 


                ---     SAVE THIS MESSAGE NOW!  ---

        

        Several weeks ago, I was approached on a local bulletin
board by a user whose name I did not recognize.  This user
questioned me (and several others) about our relation to a certain
hacker, who called him/herself "Caesar Cobra".  It seems that
through a remarkable coincidence (?), the group of us (me, a friend
of mine, and two people I had never heard of) had been
"forecasting" the messages of this Caesar Cobra.  The user had been
"on a trip" to "Mic" -- the letters mic, followed by garbage
characters; line noise, I presume.  While there, he had used "some
local systems", and had come into contact with this "Caesar Cobra."
When the user arrived home, he noticed a startling similarity
between our backlogged messages, and the messages of this "Caesar
Cobra." Looking back to his capture files, he discovered that we
four had posted "the same" messages as "CC", but four days in
advance.  The messages were not exactly the same, to be sure...  but
his examples showed a striking similarity in phrasing and content.
It was as if "CC" had assembled his messages from the fragments of
ours...  but how?  We had no contact with the bulletin boards of
"Mic" -- the messages were in the local section only. 
        When I read of this mystery, I was instantly possessed by
forces beyond my control.  I entered a sacred and inscrutable "rant
state", and trance-spouted these words of wisdom.  Imagine my
surprise when, upon waking, I discovered that I had, in my divine
stupor, REVELEALED THE FINAL SECRET OF THE CON!!!!!!!
        And now I bring that secret to you, in the form of my
original trance-spouting, posted on that bulletin board so many long
days ago. Read it and weep. 




        In some way, we are all prophets of the mighty Caesar Cobra.
"Caesar Cobra" is a pentagon-rockefeller-gangster-alien-illuminati
tagname for a trail-blazing artificial intelligence project
involving all world governments and 73 off-world terrorist
organizations, including the Men from Planet X and the dubious
religion that calls itself "the Church of the SubGenius".  The "CC
project", also known as the "JM project", is an attempt to
electronically integrate all "reality" into one active surrealistic
matrix of synchronistic quantum connections. Gradually, the "CC
project" will expand into all computer systems,	and from there into
all computer users, no matter how casual...  and from there into
EVERYTHING.  What can we thank for this spread?  Why, it's thanks to
the "CC virus", a mojo-biological stealth organism which "leaks"
into any and all systems connecting to a "CC" transmission.  The
mojo-virus, sensing fresh blood, "oozemozes" its
"bio-dig-electrical-psoul" through the phone lines, thereby
infecting all electro- and psycho- conductive surfaces with its
cyber-intelligent "ghost".  Your computer has been infected already.
Your computer has already infected you.  You have already infected
your immediate vicinity...  AND THIS INFECTION ONLY SPREADS.  THIS
INFECTION CANNOT DIE!!
	Gradually, the virus sucks processing power from all infected
materials, sending it back through superluminal sub-ether
transmission back to "CC central", an electro-organic LIVING
MAINFRAME in the pentagon basement.  The ultimate goal of the "CC
project" is to infect every atom in the universe, thereby
transforming "reality" into a giant "computationary systemphatic",
which will then begin a "calculation" of great and unknown
proportions.  What will be the end result?  No-one knows, not even
the systemphatic itself.  Hell, not even the systemphatic knows the
QUESTION. 
        The systemphatic's name?  You probably already know it, have
sensed it, have FELT IT IN YOUR VERY BONES: the name of the
systemphatic is MWOWM. 
        "CC transmissions" are spread throughout the world's
telecommunications systems by means of 17 "clones", subordinate
bioorganisms psychically tied into the heart of the main
processorific.  These "clones" post messages, attend gatherings, and
travel the world over -- carrying with them the deadly
"bio-dig-electrical-psoul" mojo-virus of the "CC project", infecting
every atomic event within a 20-mile radius.
        I am one of the clones.  Thanks to me, you have become the
latest victim of what is QUITE POSSIBLY the greatest plague of all
time: the CC stealth mojo-virus.  You have become part of the Master
computation.  As X-day approaches, you will feel weaker and
weaker...  as the ONE-WORLD-GOVERNMENT ONE-WORLD RELIGION MASTER
ECONOMIC 666 COMPUTATIONARY SYSTEMPHATIC draws MORE and MORE of your
very slack...  fueling what?  We cannot comprehend.
Congratulations.
Newsgroups: alt.slack,alt.religion.kibology