From: jjd1@cbnewsg.cb.att.com (james.j.dutton)
Subject: Re: Call for Artwork and Art Papers
Organization: AT&T
Distribution: na
Date: Mon, 23 Nov 1992 15:41:29 GMT

In article <1992Nov21.233654.6984@news.acns.nwu.edu> drmax@casbah.acns.nwu.edu (Marianna Max) writes:
>>               IRIS: A JOURNAL ABOUT WOMEN
>>
>>
>>IRIS features articles, original fiction and poetry, art, book reviews, humor,
>>news, and personal essays focusing on women's issues.  We write for an intel-
>>ligent and varied audience of both sexes.  We are a non-profit organization,
>>staffed by volunteers, and publish twice yearly, in November and April.
>>
 
Deleted.
 
>>Art features may be reviews, interviews, or essays on contemporary or
>>historical artists working in any media.  Features should be 500-1000 words,
>>typed and double-spaced, and include black and white prints or halftones of
>>the work discussed.
>>
>>                     SUBMIT FIRST DRAFT OR ABSTRACT BY JAN 8 1993
>>
>>                          ADDRESS ALL CONTRIBUTIONS TO
>>
>>ART OR ART FEATURES EDITOR,IRIS,BOX 323 HEALTH SCIENCES CENTER, UNIVERSITY
>>OF VIRGINIA, CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA  22908    (TEL) (804) 924-4500
>>
>
>
>Hey james, this sounds like something tailor made just for you.
 
                   Why all men are peegs.
                                                      By Sylvia Duuton.

 High girls Sylvia here. You know I woke up a homeless person yesterday to
ask how he felt. That ungratefull bum had the audacity to call me a beetch!
Well you could imagine my shock, chagrine like, startlment even.
I mean here I am taking time out of my busy day. Putting myself out
and this pig of a man insults me. If it wasn't for my empathy to his
plight I would have taken that bastard out. As it was I figured a wee
bit of a lesson(like his pee pee) was in order. 
 
 When he lowered his head to wallow in his vomit I gave him the peruvian
death kick to his lower spine. I think this indicated to him that I was
in fact very concerned about his situation.
 
 Well instead of thanking me like a real gentleman would have this...this
scum actually got some spittle on my flats. Well No woman had to take this
kind of abuse so I gave his ear a little poke with the butt end of my
umbrella. You should have heard that pantywaist moan. I would have
felt sorry for him butt in the back of my mind I knew that it was brutes
like him that had enslaved my fellow seesters(You knew I'd get that in there)
for generations. Well you guessed it brain matter on the tip of my brelly.
 
 Well at this point it became quite clear that this man hated and insulted
woman on a daily basis. I knew a volital situation when one is thrust upon
me.
 At this point I had to break out my ballpeen hammer as this chauvinist
pig was attempting to (slyly) escape on his hands and knees. After teaching
him a valuable lesson about what it means to be a lady I summoned a passing
squad car and had that animal arrested for assault.
 
So as you can see it's still dangerous out there. All men are potentially 
abusers and in fact probably are. Peegs, their all peegs. Be carefull
out there my seesters and don't forget to hold your ground. We're not gonna
take it.

                                         Sensitive Syilvia.
 
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 Ipsissimus of the Inner Order of Sesquipedalian Fruitcakes 
 Sesquipedalian's 'R' Us. ZX-10. DoD#564. There ain't no more.
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