HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: millerj@belize.crd.ge.com (Julia K. Miller)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: Tax-deductible Childcare Expenses
Date: 26 Aug 92 13:07:20 GMT
Reply-To: belize!millerj@steinmetz.UUCP (Julia K. Miller)
Distribution: usa
Organization: GE Consulting Services

In article <1992Aug25.213850.12670@dsd.es.com> ksouth@dsd.es.com writes:
>
>Now, I am pretty confused about this. Is an employer sponsered Dependent Care
>Account the only way to deduct childcare expenses? What is the childcare
>credit? My employer has no DCA program right now. Should I press the benefits
>manager to start one? It sounds like a really good idea. Why would a company
>not want to have such a program? Wow, the account is deducted even before
>FICA is withheld. Any and all information would be welcome.
>

	My employeer doesn't offer it but my husbands employeer does.  When I
asked mine why not I got the following response.  The way the plan works
is that you tell the employeer how much you want deducted over the year
(or partial year if you have a change in your family status during the
year).  The employeer is then responsible for taking that amount of money
out of your paycheck for the year to equal that amount.  If they should
happen to miscalculate, and don't take enough out then they would have to
make up the difference.  Additionally, if you leave the company during the
year, they are still responsible for the full amount that you said you
wanted to have taken out.  He said that they don't think that the law was
intended to work this way but some lawyers found a ambiguity in the
wording and the courts interpreted it this way.  So, if your company has
a high rate of turn over, they could be out some money from this.  I had
always thought that it was that you could take out what you put in, but
that isn't correct according to them.
	I'd like to know if anyone else has been told this.  It seemed to me
that the people who came up with the plan were kind of short sighted to
make that kind of mistake.  The human resourses people here have told me
wrong things before, so I'd be curious to know.

Julia
From: winner@Apple.COM (Stephanie Winner)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: Sushi during pregnancy - is it bad?
Date: 26 Aug 92 22:39:46 GMT
Distribution: usa
Organization: Apple Computer Inc., Cupertino, CA

In article <1992Aug21.172722.17885@cbnewse.cb.att.com> elonich@cbnewse.cb.att.com (diane.e.pedersen) writes:
>
>One other warning about fish in general is that fish can
>contain concentraions of mercury and other toxic wastes
>that could hurt the baby even if you don't feel any problems.
>For example, women are advised to not eat Great Lakes trout
>and salmon at all during pregnancy (and to limit their
>Great Lakes fish meals considerably if they are planning
>future pregnancies).
>
Yes, it is true that fish Great Lakes fish contain bad stuff,
but it is stored in their fat.  So, if you don't eat the fat
you significantly reduce your risk.  Anyway, that's what my
dad (MD/fisherman) told me while we were fishing a couple of
weeks ago.  I mentioned to him that I had heard on the news
that pregnant women shouldn't eat fish because of the pesticides,
mercury, etc.  He said that was because there was a woman
(in Mich) who ate fish everyday while she was pregnant and had
a child with a birth defect.  The birth defect was not necessarily
caused by toxins in the fish.

Anyway, if Diane or anyone else has some references regarding
fish safety I would appreciate it. Despite my skepticism I 
(did and) would avoid fish while I was pregnant since it is
only 9 months of my life, but it is a lifetime for my child.

Stephanie Winner
winner@apple.com
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: elise@ticipa.pac.sc.ti.com (Elise Wade)
Subject: Re: Sushi during pregnancy - is it bad?
Organization: Texas Instruments
Distribution: usa
Date: Thu, 27 Aug 1992 18:11:16 GMT

In article <1992Aug26.195707.2213239@locus.com> judy@locus.com (Judy Leedom Tyrer) writes:
>>Although I haven't any statistics, I'd guess that if one were concerned
>>about salmonella (which diane mentioned), avoiding chicken would be
>>indicated.  
>
>A little education on salmonella (and something everyone should know and do
>because I've had the disease and you DO NOT WANT IT).  Salmonella is found
>in raw chicken.  Cooking the chicken removes the salmonella.  However, it
>passes easily from hands, knives, and cutting boards into other foods.  So,
>if you put your raw chicken on the cutting board and then do not use soap
>to wash the board before making your salad, the salmonella will get on the
>salad.  And because it is not cooked, you can catch the disease.
>
>So, whenever you touch raw chicken, make sure that your hands and any kitchen
>utensils and surfaces that also touched the raw chicken are immediately 
>washed down with soap and water.  Having had salmonella I'm positively
>neurotic about raw chicken.  But I've never gotten sick since.
>-- 
>Judy Leedom Tyrer
>
>"The road to hell is paved with good intentions"	- William Blake

Let me add, that if your cutting board is made of a porous material
-- like wood -- soap and water may not be good enough.  Use a little
clorox (it kills just about any nasty) to insure you've gotten
rid of any salmonella.

Salmonella can also be found in eggs (best not to eat eggs raw) and
occasionally contaminated dairy products which have production 
problems.

Elise.
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: ooblick@intercon.com (Mikki Barry)
Subject: Re: Justin's Birth Story
Date: Tue, 25 Aug 92 15:14:37 GMT
Reply-To: ooblick@intercon.com (Mikki Barry)
Organization: InterCon Systems Corporation, Herndon, VA

In article <1992Aug24.184922.6330@news.media.mit.edu>, stanzi@media.mit.edu 
(Constance "Stanzi" Royden) writes:
> I have similar thoughts about child-birth classes.  Although mine did not
> advocate non-intervention, and talked a lot about different types of pain
> medications, they kind of glossed over the reality of C-sections.  They
> made it sound like C-sections were a breeze and you didn't really have
> to prepare for them.  I was unprepared for the strong emotions I felt
> after having to have a C-section after 32 hours of labor.  Now, 2 years 
> later I still have the strong feeling that I missed out on a major life
> event--that of being able to push my baby out to meet the world.  Since
> so many women have to have C-sections, I think child birth classes would
> do well to discuss this possibility more realistically and help women
> prepare themselves emotionally for this eventuallity.

I find that a bit disturbing.  Even though the midwifery practice where I 
delivered only had a 4% C-section rate, the educational process included a 
frank discussion of the possibility of c-sections, and a midwife who had 
delivered all 4 of her children by section for her personal feelings about it.

Perhaps the glossing over of sections in your childbirth class was a 
misguided and misplaced rage at the high rate of unnecessary c-sections?  I 
don't know.  But my childbirth class did quite a bit on sections even though, 
or possibly because the rate in my area is about 33%.
From: kaminski@netcom.com (Peter Kaminski)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: Waterbeds and newborns
Date: 31 Aug 92 02:31:54 GMT
Organization: The Information Deli - via Netcom / San Jose, California

Gigi Babcock <babcock@manticore.Eng.Sun.COM> writes:

>I understand that newborns on waterbeds can be a problem. What is
>the problem and what does one have to watch out for?

The problem is that newborns have heads that are bigger and heavier in
proportion to the rest of their body than older persons, and that they
can't move their heads out of a dangerous situation reliably.

Bottom line worst case: if the water bed isn't very firm, the baby's
head can make a dent deep enough for the baby to suffocate in.

Our experience: our waterbed is pretty firm and has about half an inch
or so of padding on top of it, and Ethan's slept in it with us since
he came home from the hospital.  (Though there was always at least one
adult with him in bed the first few months, which made the bed firmer.
When we were both up and he was sleeping one of us would hold him,
either on a lap in in a front pack.)

So, do what you think is safe for you and your baby.

Another waterbed consideration is electromagnetic radiation from the
heater.  It's probably not a problem (and I think someone here even
said the water itself provides ample shielding), but you might want
to make sure you have a non-EM radiating heater, or turn it off when
you're in bed, or whatever.

Pete, dad to Ethan (3 3/4 years)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: tash@cbnewse.cb.att.com (Natasha R. Dela Cruz)
Subject: Purple Crayon store
Organization: AT&T
Distribution: usa
Date: Sun, 23 Aug 1992 16:59:43 GMT

Does anyone know if the Purple Crayon store still exists?
I tried calling the phone number somebody posted in
April, but I got an answering machine with a personal- 
sounding message (it did not say "Purple Crayon").  I called
directory assistance in Oakland, and they showed no listing
for "Purple Crayon."  Does anyone know what happened to it?

Thank you,
Tash
P.S. The phone number I used (posted by Debra S. Bettis on 
April 22, 1992) is (510)653-3724.
-- 
Natasha Richardson Dela Cruz	    *******************************
AT&T Bell Laboratories		    *Proud MOM of Alexander Joshua*
att!ihlpm!tash, tash@ihlpm.att.com  *******************************
	All ideas expressed here are mine, Mine, MINE!!!!  :-)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: judy@locus.com (Judy Leedom Tyrer)
Subject: Re: "Missing out" (was. re:  Justin...)
Organization: Locus Computing Corporation, Los Angeles, California
Date: Thu, 03 Sep 1992 02:23:28 GMT

All this talk of missing the birth experience makes me think of a half
empty glass.  While I know some people are sharing this as something they
have had a moment of regret over, I have known some people and fear I am
reading some others where this has become a major issue in life and where
they feel less of a woman for having missed the experience.  

There is an element in our society that fosters the view that "real women
give birth vaginally".  So if you are pregnant and believe that nonsense,
then start disbelieving it soon.  If you were lucky enough to be a real
woman by that definition, and continue to propogate this myth, please stop.

How a woman gives birth has about as much bearing on her ability to be caring
worthwhile mother as whether or not she won a gold medal in the olympics.
-- 
Judy Leedom Tyrer

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions"	- William Blake
From: joanne@hpcc01.corp.hp.com (Joanne Petersen)
Date: Thu, 27 Aug 1992 18:52:25 GMT
Subject: Mail bounced for shakti!kailash.cse.iitb.ernet.in!raj
Organization: Hewlett-Packard PAITC Data Center
Newsgroups: misc.kids

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I tried to send the Toilet Training FAQ to this address but it wasn't able
to go through.  I can try breaking it into smaller pieces but I also got a
message that the mail failed (i.e., address wasn't valid).  

Please send another address that I can try to send the FAQ to you.

joanne
From: pburch@roc.mbcr.bcm.tmc.edu (Paula Burch)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: More on breast pumping
Date: 28 Aug 1992 22:45:26 GMT
Reply-To: pburch@bcm.tmc.edu (Paula Burch)
Originator: pburch@roc.mbcr.bcm.tmc.edu


My friend who is the mother of a nine month old girl shares the use 
of the expensive, not very portable Medela pump with me. She was just 
remarking to me how few women she knows have been successful with 
continuing to pump milk for their babies while working. Most give up 
after a couple of months, she said. In fact, she doesn't know anyone 
who's managed to stick it out 6 months except for herself. She believes 
that she's got unusual genetics allowing her to be so good at milk 
production that using a small, cheap ($40) electric pump worked for 
her for so long. Even so, she was starting to have trouble before her 
pump broke and she started using the Medela. Now her supply has gone
back up, because the expensive rental unit works so well.

So, here's another poll for you, if you've used a breast pump successfully 
or unsuccessfully while at work.

1. What kind of pump did you use?
   a. Large Medela (not Lactina, but the heavy cast-metal 
      in clear acrylic one)
   b. Medela Lactina
   c. Nurture III
   d. inexpensive (<$100) electric pump
   e. battery-operated pump
   f. manual pump
   g. hand expression
(If these categories don't fit, tell me so.)

2. How long were you able (or have you been able so far) to express enough 
milk to meet your baby' needs without supplementary formula? Weeks? Months? 
Not at all?

Apologies to those who are tired of hearing about breastfeeding, but this is 
the only way to get this kind of information.

Paula Burch
pburch@bcm.tmc.edu

_________________________________________________________________________
The Republican platform calls for the extension of the 14th amendment to
 "unborn children." Saving the life of a woman with an ectopic pregnancy
would thus require deliberate murder of the embryo--which the state could
   not possibly then allow. About 1% of U.S. pregnancies are ectopic.
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: jbrindle@halcyon.com (Jennifer Brindle)
Subject: Re: Johnny-Jump-Ups
Organization: The 23:00 News and Mail Service
Date: Thu, 27 Aug 1992 22:12:51 GMT


Our firstborn didn't use the Johnny-jump-up that we bought because
our pediatrician recommended it over a walker.  He didn't like it at
all.  He LOVED the walker.  We still have it as we now have a new son,
but I won't be a bit surprised if he, too, doesn't use it.

Also, you have to have the "right" type of door opening to use a JJU.

Jennifer
Organization: University of Maine System
Date: Thursday, 27 Aug 1992 13:38:01 EDT
From: Ailsa N.T. Murphy <IO81409@MAINE.MAINE.EDU>
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: Vegetarian Lunch - Suggestions?

how about hummus?  or vegetarian hot dogs?  no, on second thought,
little kids aren't supposed to get hot dogs, due to the danger of
choking.  but hummus makes good sandwiches.  and katy loves tofu
sandwiches (two think slices of tofu, ketchup, mustard, on two
slices of toast).  there's also tomato sandwiches.  or salad.  or
canned vegetarian vegetable soup (or the homemade variaty, of course,
but cans are easy to pack).  or dal, if your child will eat it (katy
won't).  she loves vindaloo, though - no, that's got dairy in it, sorry.

that's all i can think of off the top of my head.  hope it helps.

                                             -ailsa
From: millman@ursa.UUCP (Phillip Millman)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Are Fetal Heart Monitors needed??
Date: 28 Aug 92 17:03:57 GMT
Organization: Bear Stearns, NY
X-Newsreader: Tin 1.1 PL4


My wife and I are  in disagreement about the need of a fetal heart monitor
during labor.

My Wife's Opinion:
	They are totally uneccessary except for maybe .01 % on the babies
being born.  If the babies heart shoul flutter even for a second, the 
quacks (doctors) will do a C-section which they want to do anyway (because,
 no screaming mothers, nervious fathers, fatter fees, and etc.)

My Opinion:
	G-d forbid we are the .01%

Any experiences that can help us through this delima ??

Phillip Millman
millman@bear.com
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: jbrindle@halcyon.com (Jennifer Brindle)
Subject: Re: Walkers: should I get one?
Organization: The 23:00 News and Mail Service
Date: Thu, 27 Aug 1992 21:30:38 GMT

All this stuff about walkers really irks me.  Okay, walkers aren't the
safest thing in our house--we know.  But they do serve a purpose and
just like anything else, if used properly, present little risk.  Anyone
who doesn't gate both stair openings when they have a mobile child who
isn't capable of negotiating the steps is asking for trouble, walker or
not.  Why not ban stoves?  After all, all a toddler has to do is reach up
and touch a hot burner and you've got major trouble.  A little prevention
and a little common sense goes a long way.

Jennifer
From: chirlian@fieser.brynmawr.edu (L.E. Chirlian)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: rear facing car seats in rear
Date: 27 Aug 1992 16:22:17 -0500
Organization: UTexas Mail-to-News Gateway
NNTP-Posting-Host: cs.utexas.edu

	I had to put Libby in the back seat from day 1 because our car
cannot properly hold a car seat in the front.  I was concerned because
the instruction book cautioned against doing this because the baby
could stop breathing.  I asked several people about this (ped, other
parents) and the concencus was that this wasn't a concern for full
term babies (I worried anyway :-)).  
	
	I got a mirror to put on the rear window and it has worked
just fine.  I found that the mirror designed to be used on the front
windshield to see kids forward facing in the rear actually worked
better on the rear window than the one I specially ordered (from The
Right Start, I think) that was specifically designed for the rear
window.  I can see Libby without turning around and glancing at her
does not take my concentration off the road (the one time I had her in
the front seat in another car I found it very tempting to look at
her).  
	
	If you do have one of these mirrors, here's a trick to keep it
adjusted.  I found that the connection between the suction cup base
and the mirror loosened up over time so the mirror always needed to be
readjusted.  Putting a small amount of tissue around the base of the
mirror fixed this problem for us.  
	
	I'm not advocating either position, but many new cars cannot
take infant seats in the front (air bags, automatic belts, etc.) and
this mirror saved me a lot of worry.  

				Lisa

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 Lisa Chirlian                                  chirlian@fieser.brynmawr.edu
 Department of Chemistry, Bryn Mawr College, Bryn Mawr, PA 19010
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: sj@netcom.com (Suzanne Jacobs)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: PLEASE, PLEASE READ! Please help!
Date: 1 Sep 92 07:17:02 GMT
Organization: Netcom - Online Communication Services  (408 241-9760 guest)

I do not understand why everyone perceives the problem to be that
the mom needs to relax about the breastfeeding and let the dad
do more feeding of the child.  The serious problem is that the dad
sleeps through the sound of the apnea monitor going off.

Isn't a mistake like this fatal???????????????
From: ltaylor@eec.East.Sun.COM (Laura Taylor - Network Operations East)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Children & Sex
Date: 4 Sep 1992 13:59:47 GMT
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Inc.
Distribution: world
Reply-To: ltaylor@eec.East.Sun.COM
NNTP-Posting-Host: eec.east.sun.com

I have a 10 year old daughter whom will be 11 by the
time our baby is born next May. Right now, my 10 year
old is at the age where she is becoming interested in
sexual exploration. She uses sexual terms, talks about
sex with her friends, and she masturbates. I realize that
this is all rather normal for a 6th grader.

However, recently I have suspected that she has engaged
sexually in some way with her uncle, whom also happens
to be her exact age...10 years old. (Her grandfather had
a child when he was 50 from a second marriage.) We have
talked to her about this, and about incest, and about
how it is not okay for children to engage in any kind of
sex with anyone in their family.

It never occurred to me until this thing with her uncle
came up, but now I have suddenly become worried about my
unborn baby...will my daughter try to engage the baby in
sex? I sure as hell hope not, as I think that is probably
the one thing I could never forgive her for. I would like
to talk to her about this, without being so heavy-handed
that she is afraid to talk to me about sex. In the past, 
we have always talked about sex openly in our family.

However, I also want to be very emphatic about the fact
that it is just plainly not okay for children to have sex
with any family member. But at the same time, I don't want
to spook her and scare her. 

I don't know if this is relevant, but my partner is another
woman. We have never engaged in any sexual behavior in front
of our daughter, and for the most part, our daughter is a
healthy, well-adjusted, mature girl. 

I always expected that I would have to talk to her about
birth control, and HIV, but it never occurred to me that
she would get the idea that it is okay to engage sexually
with family members. I feel very awkward bringing this up,
though I will for sure bring it up, as it is very serious.

Has anyone else had any similar such talk with their kids?
Newsgroups: misc.kids
From: betsyp@apollo.hp.com (Betsy Perry)
Subject: Re: No morning sickness second time around
Date: Wed, 2 Sep 1992 13:32:40 GMT
Organization: Hewlett-Packard Corporation, Chelmsford, MA

In article <1992Sep1.204030.622@samba.oit.unc.edu> cew@med.unc.edu (Cathryn W. Chiesa) writes:
>Ok, call me crazy but I am worried that I don't have morning
>sickness with the second one.  Three years ago I spend the
>first trimester extremely nauseated, but not throwing up all
>the time.  So far, at week six I only have a little queasiness
>in the morning.  Anyone else find the did not have it the 
>second time.  My OB said the nausea means all the hormones
>are at the right level.  

I'm ten weeks into my second pregnancy, and it's been a blessed
relief how much BETTER I feel than during the first one.
At this time in my first pregnancy, I was a basket case -- 
sleeping from 7PM to 7AM, with a very sensitive appetite (I never
threw up, but I felt queasy most of the time), and exhausted when
awake.  This time, I'm sleeping a *little* more (bed at 9PM instead of
10PM), and feeling a *little* queasy.  

Before this pregnancy, I was terrified about how I could possibly
cope with a debilitating first trimester and an active toddler. 
Luckily, I'm having an active first trimester and a debilitating
toddler instead.

Betsy

>my first pregnancy was so easy I am afraid I used up all
>my luck and this one will not be so easy.  

Heh, heh.  I feel that way about babies -  my daughter was such a
ridiculously easy baby, I'm afraid I've been spoiled; the next one's
bound to have colic at the very least.

-- 
Betsy Hanes Perry   (note P in userid)     betsyp@apollo.hp.com
Hewlett-Packard Company
"It seems to us that the readers who want fiction to be like life are
considerably outnumbered by those who would like life to be like fiction."
Newsgroups: misc.kids