From: dws@margay.cs.wisc.edu (DaviD W. Sanderson)
Newsgroups: rec.humor,alt.folklore.computers
Subject: canonical opcode list (LONG!)
Summary: humorous opcodes that ought to exist
Date: 16 Apr 92 03:57:30 GMT
Reply-To: dws@cs.wisc.edu
Organization: UW-Madison Computer Sciences Department

It's been a while since I last posted this.

Here's my canonical alphabetized list of assembler opcodes that really
ought to exist somewhere.  It is the combination of all the lists of
such opcodes I have seen.  (My thanks to all who have contributed to
this list.)  I welcome any new opcodes you may wish to contribute!

The shar also includes a script which, when fed the opcodes file,
produces a corresponding regular nroff man page.

DaviD W. Sanderson (dws@cs.wisc.edu)

#!/bin/sh
# This is a shell archive (produced by shar 3.49)
# To extract the files from this archive, save it to a file, remove
# everything above the "!/bin/sh" line above, and type "sh file_name".
#
# made 04/16/1992 03:48 UTC by dws@margay
# Source directory /var/home/dws/pub/dws/funops
#
# existing files will NOT be overwritten unless -c is specified
#
# This shar contains:
# length  mode       name
# ------ ---------- ------------------------------------------
#  30154 -rw------- opcodes
#    946 -rwx------ mkman
#
# ============= opcodes ==============
if test -f 'opcodes' -a X"$1" != X"-c"; then
	echo 'x - skipping opcodes (File already exists)'
else
echo 'x - extracting opcodes (Text)'
sed 's/^X//' << 'SHAR_EOF' > 'opcodes' &&
AAC	Alter All Commands
AAD	Alter All Data
AAO	Add And Overflow
AAR	Alter At Random
AB	Add Backwards
ABC	AlphaBetize Code
ABR	Add Beyond Range
ACC	Advance CPU Clock
ACDC	Allow Controller to Delete Contents
ACDP	Allow Controller to Die Peacefully
ACQT	Advance Clock to Quitting Time
ADB	Another Damn Bug
AEE	Absolve Engineering Errors
AFF	Add Fudge Factor
AFHB	Align Fullword on Halfword Boundary
AFP	Abnormalize Floating Point
AFR	Abort Funny Routine
AFVC	Add Finagle's Variable Constant
AGB	Add GarBage
AGWA	Add and Get Wrong Answer
AI	Add Improper
AIB	Attack Innocent Bystander
AIB	Attack Innocent Bystanders
AISG	Access and Improve Student Grade
AMM	Add Mayo and Mustard
AMM	Answer My Mail
AMS	Add Memory to System
ANC	ANnoy Consultant
ANFSCD	And Now For Something Completely Different
AOI	Annoy Operator Immediate
AR	Advance Rudely
AR	Alter Reality
ARN	Add and Reset to Non-zero
ARN	Add and Reset to Nonzero
ARZ	Add and Reset to Zero
AS	Add Sideways
ASQGSA	ASCII Stupid Question, Get a Stupid ANSI
AT	Accumulate Trivia
AWP	Argue With Programmer
AWTT	Assemble With Tinker Toys
BA	Branch Anywhere
BAC	Branch to Alpha Centauri
BAD	Branch And Die
BAD	Branch to Auto Destruct
BAF	Blow All Fuses
BAFL	Branch And FLush
BAH	Branch And Hang
BALC	Branch And Link Cheeseburger
BAP	Branch And Punt
BAW	Bells And Whistles
BB	Branch on Bug
BBBB	Byte Baudy Bit and Branch
BBBF	Branch on Bit Bucket Full
BBD	Branch on Bastille Day
BBI	Branch on Burned-out Indicator
BBIL	Branch on Burned-out Indicator Light
BBLB	Branch on Blinking Light Bulb
BBT	Branch on Binary Tree
BBW	Branch Both Ways
BCB	Burp and Clear Bytes
BCF	Branch and Catch Fire
BCF	Branch on Chip box Full
BCIL	Branch Creating Infinite Loop
BCR	Backspace Card Reader
BCS	Branch and Crash System
BCU	Be Cruel and Unusual
BD	Backspace Disk
BD	Branch to Data
BDC	Break Down and Cry
BDI	Branch to Data Indirect
BDM	Branch and Disconnect Memory
BDT	Burn Data Tree
BDU	Branch on Dense User
BE	Branch Everywhere
BEW	Branch Either Way
BF	Belch Fire
BF	Blow Fuse
BF	Branch Forever
BFD	Branch on Full Disk
BFF	Branch and Form Feed
BFM	Be Fruitful and Multiply
BH	Branch and Hang
BIR	Branch Inside Ranch
BIRM	Branch on Index Register Missing
BLC	Branch and Loop Continuous
BLI	Branch and Loop Infinite
BLM	Branch, Like, Maybe
BLMWM	Branch, Like, Maybe, Wow, Man
BLP	Boot from Line Printer
BLR	Branch and Lose Return
BLSH	Buy Low, Sell High
BLT	Break Little Thing
BM	Branch Maybe
BMI	Blow up Memory Immediate
BMI	Branch on Missing Index
BMI	Branch to Muncee Immediate
BMP	Branch and Make Popcorn
BMR	Branch Multiple Registers
BMUS	Beam Me Up, Scotty
BNA	Branch to Nonexistant Address
BNCB	Branch and Never Come Back
BNL	Become a Neo-Luddite
BNR	Branch for No Reason
BOB	Branch On Bug
BOD	Beat On Disk
BOD	Branch on Operator Desperate
BOH	Branch On Humidity
BOH	Branch on Operator High
BOHP	Bribe Operator for Higher Priority
BOI	Byte Operator Immediately
BOP	Boot OPerator
BOT	Branch On Tree
BPB	Branch on Program Bug
BPDI	Be Polite, Don't Interrupt
BPIM	Bury Programmer In Manuals
BPL	Branch PLease
BPM	Become a Psych Major
BPO	Branch on Power Off
BPO	Branch on Power On
BPP	Branch and Pull the Plug
BR	Byte and Run
BRA	Branch to Random Address
BRB	BRanch on Beaver
BRH	BRanch & Hang
BRI	BRanch Indefinitely
BRL	BRanch and Leak
BRO	BRanch and Overheat
BRO	BRanch to Oblivion
BS	Behave Strangely
BSC	Branch on Second Coming
BSC	Burst Selector Channel
BSD	BackSpace Disk
BSI	Back up Sewer Immediate
BSI	Backup Sewer Immediately
BSM	Branch and Scramble Memory
BSO	Branch on Sleepy Operator
BSP	BackSpace Punch
BSR	Branch and Stomp Registers
BSS	Branch on SunSpot
BSST	BackSpace and Stretch Tape
BTD	Branch on Time of Day
BTD	Byte The Dust
BTI	Blow Trumpet Immediately
BTJ	Branch and Turn Japanese
BTO	Branch To Oblivion
BTW	Branch on Third Wednesday
BU	Branch Unexpectedly
BUTI	Blow Up Terminal Immediately
BVS	Branch and Veer South
BW	Branch on Whim
BWABL	Bells, Whistles, And Blinking Lights
BWC	Branch When Convenient
BWF	Busy, Wait Forever
BWOP	BeWilder OPerator
BYDS	Beware Your Dark Side
BYTE	BYte TEst
CAC	Calling All Cars
CAC	Cash And Carry
CAF	Convert ASCII to Farsii
CAI	Corrupt Accounting Information
CAIL	Crash After I Leave
CAR	Cancel Accounts Receivable
CAT	Confused And Tired
CB	Consult Bozo
CBA	Compare and Branch Anyway
CBBR	Crash and Blow Boot Read-only memory
CBNC	Close, But No Cigar
CBS	Clobber BootStrap
CC	Call Calvery
CC	Compliment Core
CCB	Chocolate Chip Byte-mode
CCB	Consult Crystal Ball
CCC	Crash if Carry Clear
CCCP	Conditionally Corrupt Current Process
CCD	Choke Cough and Die
CCD	Clear Core and Dump
CCR	Change Channels at Random
CCS	Chinese Character Set
CCWR	Change Color of Write Ring
CD	Complement Disk
CDC	Clear Disk and Crash
CDC	Close Disk Cover
CDIOOAZ	Calm Down, It's Only Ones And Zeroes
CDS	Change Disk Speed
CEMU	Close Eyes and Monkey with User space
CEX	Call EXterminator
CF	Come From [replaces goto]
CFE	Call Field Engineer
CFP	Change and Forget Password
CFS	Corrupt File Structure
CG	Convert to Garbage
CH	Create Havoc
CHCJ	Compare Haig to Christine Jorgensen
CHPAMR	CHase Pointers Around Machine Room
CHSE	Compare Half-words and Swap if Equal
CIB	Change Important Byte
CIC	Cash In Chips
CID	Compare and Ignore Data
CIMM	Create Imaginary Memory Map
CIZ	Clear If Zero
CLBR	CLoBber Register
CLBRI	CLoBber Register Immediate
CM	Circulate Memory
CMD	Compare Meaningless Data
CMD	CPU Melt Down
CMI	Clobber Monitor Immediate
CML	Compute Meaning of Life
CMP	Create Memory Prosthesis
CMS	Click MicroSwitch
CN	Compare Nonsensically
CNB	Cause Nervous Breakdown
CNS	Call Nonexistent Subroutine
COCS	Copy Object Code to Source
COD	Crash On Demand
COLB	Crash for Operator's Lunch Break
COM	Clear Operator's Mind
COMF	COMe From
CON	Call Operator Now
COS	Copy Object code to Source file
COWYHU	Come Out With Your Hands Up
CP	Compliment Programmer
CP%FKM	CPU \(em FlaKeout Mode
CP%WM	CPU \(em Weird Mode
CPB	Create Program Bug
CPN	Call Programmer Names
CPPR	Crumple Printer Paper and Rip
CRASH	Continue Running After Stop or Halt
CRB	CRash and Burn
CRD	Confirm Rumor by Denial
CRM	CReate Memory
CRM	Clear Random Memory
CRN	Compare with Random Number
CRN	Convert to Roman Numerals
CRYPT	reCuRsive encrYPt Tape
CS	Crash System
CSL	Curse and Swear Loudly
CSN	Call Supervisor Names
CSNIO	Crash System on Next I/O
CSS	Crash Subsidiary Systems
CSU	Call Self Unconditional
CTDMR	Change Tape Density, Mid Record
CTT	Call Time and Temperature
CU	Convert to Unary
CUC	Cheat Until Caught
CVFL	ConVert Floating to Logical
CVFP	ConVert Fortran to Pascal
CVG	ConVert to Garbage
CVU	ConVert to Unary
CWAH	Create Woman And Hold
CWB	Carry With Borrow
CWDC	Cut Wires and Drop Core
CWG	Chase Wild Goose
CWGK	Compare Watt to Genghis Khan
CWIT	Compare Watt to Ivan the Terrible
CWM	Compare Watt to Mussolini
CWOM	Complement Write-Only Memory
CZZC	Convert Zone to Zip Code
DA	Develop Amnesia
DAB	Delete All Bugs
DAC	Divide And Conquer
DAD	Destroy A-Disk
DAO	Divide And Overflow
DAP	De-select Active Peripheral
DAUF	Delete All Useless Files
DB	Drop Bits
DBL	Desegregate Bus Lines
DBR	DeBase Register
DBTP	Drop Back Ten and Punt
DBZ	Divide By Zero
DC	Degauss Core
DC	Divide and Conquer
DCAD	Dump Core And Die
DCD	Drop Cards Double
DCGC	Dump Confusing Garbage to Console
DCI	Disk Crash Immediate
DCON	Disable CONsle
DCR	Double-precision CRash
DCT	Drop Cards Triple
DCWPDGD	Drink Coffee, Write Program, Debug, Get Drunk
DD	Destroy Disk
DD	Drop Disk
DDC	Dally During Calculations
DDOA	Drop Dead On Answer
DDS	Delaminate Disk Surface
DDT	Debug Program
DDWB	Deposit Directly in Waste Basket
DEB	Disk Eject Both
DEC	Decompile Executable Code
DEI	Disk Eject Immediate
DEM	Disk Eject Memory
DFA	Disable FAns
DGO	Decrement the Grades of Others
DGT	Dispense Gin and Tonic
DHTPL	Disk Head Three Point Landing
DIA	Develop Ineffective Address
DICE	Delete Invalid Customer Engineer
DIE	DIsable Everything
DIF	DIsable Fuses
DIG	DIsable Gravity
DIH	Disable Interrupts and Hang
DIIL	Disable Interrupts and enter Infinite Loop
DIRFO	Do It Right For Once
DISC	DISmount CPU
DK	Destroy Klingons
DK%WMM	DisK unit \(em Washing Machine Mode
DKP	Disavow Knowledge of Programmer
DLN	Don't Look Now
DLP	Drain Literal Pool
DMAG	Do MAGic
DMNS	Do what i Mean, Not what i Say
DMP	Destroy Memory Protect key
DMPE	Decide to Major in Phys. Ed.
DMPK	Destroy Memory Protect Key
DMZ	Divide Memory by Zero
DND	Destroy Neighbor's Data
DNPG	Do Not Pass Go
DO	Divide and Overflow
DO	Divide and Overflow [IBM PC]
DOC	Drive Operator Crazy
DOV	Divide and OVerflow
DP	Destroy Peripherals
DPC	Decrement Program Counter
DPCS	Decrement Program Counter Secretly
DPK	Destroy storage Protect Key
DPMI	Declare Programmer Mentally Incompetent
DPN	Double Precision No-op
DPR	Destroy PRogram
DPS	Disable Power Supply
DR	Detach Root
DRAF	DRAw Flowchart
DRAM	Decrement RAM
DRBA	Deposit Round-off in my Bank Account
DRD	DRop Dead
DRI	Disable Random Interrupt
DROM	Destroy ROM
DRT	Disconnect Random Terminal
DS	Deadlock System
DSD	Dismount System Disk
DSI	Do Something Interesting
DSO	Disable System Operator
DSP	Degrade System Performance
DSR	Detonate Status Register
DSTD	Do Something Totally Different
DSUIT	Do Something Utterly, Indescribably Terrible
DT%FFP	DecTape \(em unload and Flappa FlaP
DT%SHO	DecTape \(em Spin Hubs Opposite
DTB	Destructively Test Bit
DTC	Destroy This Command
DTE	Decrement Telephone Extension
DTI	Do The Impossible
DTRT	Do The Right Thing
DTVFL	Destroy Third Variable From Left
DU	Dump User
DUD	Do Until Dead
DW	Destroy World
DWIM	Do What I Mean
DWIT	Do What I'm Thinking
DWIW	Do What I Want
EA	Enable Anything
EAC	Emulate Acoustic Coupler
EAL	Enable AC to Logic rack
EAO	Enable AC to Operator
EBB	Edit and Blank Buffer
EBB	Empty Bit Bucket
EBR	Erase Before Reading
EBRS	Emit Burnt Resistor Smell
EC	Eat Card
ECF	Explode and Catch Fire
ECL	Early Care Lace
ECO	Electrocute Computer Operator
ECP	Erase Card Punch
ED	Eject Disk
ED	Execute Data
EDD	Eat Disk and Die
EDIT	Erase Data and Increment Time
EDP	Emulate Debugged Program
EDR	Emit Deadly Radiation
EDR	Execute Destructive Read
EDS	Execute Data Segment
EEOIFNO	Execute Every Other Instruction From Now On
EEP	Erase Entire Program
EFB	Emulate Five-volt Battery
EFD	Eject Floppy Disk
EFD	Emulate Frisbee using Disk pack
EFE	Emulate Fatal Error
EHC	Emulate Headless Chicken
EIA	Elvis Is Alive
EIAO	Execute In Any Order
EIEIO	Evaluate, Increment, Excrement, Invert, Output
EIO	Erase I/O page
EIO	Execute Invalid Op-code
EIO	Execute Invalid Opcode
EIOC	Execute Invalid Op-Code
EJD	EJect Disk
EJD%V	EJect Disk \(em with initial velocity V
ELP	Enter Loop Permenantly
EM	EMulate 407
EM	Evacuate Memory
EMIF	Erase Most Important File
EMM	Emulate More Memory
EMPC	EMulate Pocket Calculator
EMSE	Edit and Mark Something Else
EMSL	Entire Memory Shift Left
EMT	Electrocute Maintenance Technician
EMW	Emulate Maytag Washer
ENA	ENable Anything
END	Erase Neighbor's Data
ENF	Emit Noxious Fumes
ENG	ENable Gravity
ENO	Emulate No-Op
EO	Electrocute Operator
EOB	Execute Operator and Branch
EOI	Explode On Interrupt
EOS	Erase Operating System
EP	Execute Programmer
EPD	Explode Peripheral Device
EPI	Execute Programmer Immediate
EPITS	Execute Previous Instruction Then Skip
EPL	Emulate Phone Line
EPP	Eject Printer Paper
EPS	Electrostatic Print and Smear
EPS	Execute Program Sideways
EPSW	Execute Program Status Word
EPT	Erase Process Table
EPT	Erase Punched Tape
ERIC	Eject Random Integrated Circuit
ERM	Erase Reserved Memory
EROM	Erase Read-Only Memory
EROS	Erase Read-Only Storage
EROS	Erase Read-Only Storage [Everex int]
ERS	Erase Read-only Storage
ESB	Eject Selectric Ball
ESC	Emulate System Crash
ESD	Eat Shit and Die
ESD	Eject Spinning Dish
ESL	Exceed Speed of Light
ESP	Enable SPrinkler system
ETI	Execute This Instruction
ETM	Emulate Trinary Machine
ETPH	E. T. Phone Home
EVC	Execute Verbal Commands
EWD	Enter Warp Drive
EWM	Enter Whimsy Mode
EXB	EXcrement and Branch
EXE	EXecute Engineer
EXI	EXecute Invalid operation
EXO	EXecute Operator
EXOP	EXecute OPerator
EXP	EXecute Programmer
EXPP	EXecute Political Prisoner
FAY	Fetch Amulet of Yendor
FB	Find Bugs
FC	Fry Console
FCJ	Feed Card and Jam
FCJ	Feed Cards and Jam
FD	Forget Data
FDR	Feed Disk Randomly
FERA	Forms Eject and Run Away
FFF	Form Feed Forever
FLD	FLing Disk
FLI	Flash Lights Impressively
FM	Forget Memory
FMP	Finish My Program
FOPC	False Out-of-Paper Condition
FPC	Feed Paper Continuously
FPT	Fire Photon Torpedoes
FRG	Fill with Random Garbage
FRS	Fetch Ring of Sauron
FS	Feign Sleep
FSM	Fold, Spindle, and Mutilate
FSR	Form Skip and Runaway
FSRA	Forms Skip and Run Away
FYBR	Follow Yellow Brick Road
GAP	Grade All Projects
GBB	Go to Back of Bus
GCAR	Get Correct Answer Regardless
GCR	Generate Confusing Results
GDP	Grin Defiantly at Programmer
GDR	Grab Degree and Run
GENT	GENerate Thesis
GEW{JO}	Go to the End of the World {Jump Off}
GFD	Go Forth and Divide
GFM	Go Forth and Multiply
GIE	Generate Irreversible Error
GLC	Generate Lewd Comment
GMC	Generate Machine Check
GMCC	Generate Machine Check and Cash
GND	Guess at Next Digit
GORS	GO Real Slow
GPCR	Generate Petty Cache Request
GREM	Generate Random Error Message
GREP	Global Ruin, Expiration, and Purgation
GRMC	Generate Rubber Machine Check
GS	Get Strange
GSB	Gulp and Store Bytes
GSI	Generate Spurious Interrupts
GSU	Geometric Shift Up
GTJ	Go To Jail
HACF	Halt And Catch Fire
HAH	Halt And Hang
HBW	Hang Bus and Wait
HCF	Halt and Catch Fire
HCP	Hide Central Processor
HCRS	Hang in CRitical Section
HDH	Hi Dee Ho
HDO	Halt and Disable Operator
HDRW	Halt and Display Random Word
HELP	Hinder Everyone with Little Productivity
HELP	Type 'No Help Available'
HEO	Halt and Execute Operator
HF	Hide File
HGD	Halt, Get Drunk
HHB	Halt and Hang Bus
HIS	Halt in Imposible State
HOO	Hide Operator's Output
HRPR	Hang up and Ruin Printer Ribbon
HSC	Halt on System Crash
HSJ	Halt, Skip and Jump
HTC	Halt and Toss Cookies
HTS	Halt and Throw Sparks
HUAL	Halt Until After Lunch
HUP	Hang Up Phone
HWP	Halt Without Provocation
IA	Illocical And
IAE	Ignore All Exceptions
IAI	Inquire And Ignore
IAND	Illogical AND
IAR	Ignore All Requests
IB	Insert Bug
IBM	Increment and Branch to Muncee
IBP	Insert Bug and Proceed
IBR	Insert Bugs at Random
ICB	Interrupt, Crash and Burn
ICM	Immerse Central Memory
ICMD	Initiate Core Melt Down
ICR	Incur Costly Repair [Sun Tempest]
ICSP	Invert Crt Screen Picture
IDC	Initiate Destruct Command
IDI	Invoke Divine Intervention
IDNOP	InDirect No-OP
IDPS	Ignore Disk Protect Switch
IEOF	Ignore End Of File
IF	Invoke Force
IGI	Increment Grade Immediate
IGIT	Increment Grade Immediate Twice
IGO	Increment Grade Overnight
IHC	Initiate Head Crash
IHTFP	Increment Hormones, Test For Puberty
II	Inquire and Ignore
IIB	Ignore Inquiry and Branch
IIC	Insert Invisible Characters
IIL	Irreversable Infinite Loop
IM	Imagine Memory
IMBP	Insert Mistake and Blame Programmer
IMP	Imitate Monty Python
IMPG	IMPress Girlfriend
IMV	IMpress Visitors
INCAM	INCrement Arbitrary Memory
ING	INquire & iGnore
INI	Ignore Next Instruction
INOP	Indirect No-OP
INR	INstigate Rumor
INW	INvalidate Warranty
IOI	Ignore Operator's Instruction
IOR	Illogical OR
IOS	Ignore Operating System
IP	Increment and Pray
IPI	Ignore Previous Instruction
IPM	Ignore Programmer's Mistakes
IPOP	Interrupt Processor, Order Pizza
IPS	Incinerate Power Supply
IPS	Increment Power Supply
IPT	Ignite Paper Tape
IRB	Invert Record and Branch
IRBI	Insert Random Bits Indexed
IRC	Insert Random Commands
IRE	Insert Random Errors
IRI	Ignore Rude Interrupts
IRPF	Infinite Recursive Page Fault
ISC	Ignore Supervisor Calls
ISC	Ignore System Crash
ISC	Insert Sarcastic Comments
ISI	Increment and Skip on Inifinity
ISP	Increment and Skip on Pi
ISTK	Invert STacK
ITML	Initiate Termites into Macro Library
IU	Ignore User[s]
IXOR	Illogical eXclusive OR
IZ	Ignore Zeroes
JAA	Jump Almost Always
JBS	Jump and Blow Stack
JCI	Jump to Current Instruction
JFM	Jump on Full Moon
JHRB	Jump to H&R Block
JLP	Jump and Lose Pointer
JLR	Jump and Lose Return
JMAT	JuMp on Alternate Thursdays
JN	Jump to Nowhere
JNL	Jump when programmer is Not Looking
JOB	Jump On Beaver
JOM	Jump Out of Memory
JOM	Jump Over Moon
JOP	Jump OPerator
JPA	Jump when Pizza Arrives
JRAN	Jump RANdom
JRCF	Jump Relative and Catch Fire
JRGA	Jump Relative and Get Arrested
JRL	Jump to Random Location
JRSR	Jump to Random SubRoutine
JSC	Jump on System Crash
JSOR	Jump Somewhere Over Rainbow
JSU	Jump Self Unconditional
JT	Jump if Tuesday
JTT	Jump and Tangle Tape
JTZ	Jump to Twilight Zone
JWN	Jump When Necessary
KCE	Kill Consultant on Error
KCE	Kill repairman [CE]
KDO	Knock Disk Over
KEPITU	Kill Every Process In The Universe
KOP	Kill OPerator
KP	Krunch Paper
KPR	Kill PRogrammer
KSR	Keyboard Shift Right
KUD	Kill User's Data
KWWE	Kill Wicked Witch of East
KWWW	Kill Wicked Witch of West
LAC	Lose All Communication
LAGW	Load And Go Wrong
LAP	Laugh At Program
LAP	Laugh At Programmer
LCC	Load and Clear Core
LCD	Launch Cartridge Disk
LCK	Lock Console Keyswitch
LEB	Link Edit Backwards
LIA	Load Ineffective Address
LMB	Lose Message and Branch
LMO	Load and Mug Operator
LMYB	Logical MaYBe
LN	Lose inode Number
LNP	Load N digits of Pi
LOSM	Log Off System Manager
LP%PAS	Line Printer \(em Print And Smear
LP%RDD	Line Printer \(em Reverse Drum Direction
LP%TCR	Line Printer \(em Tangle and Chew Ribbon
LPA	Lead Programmer Astray
LPRTC	Load Program counter from Real Time Clock
LR	Load Revolver
LRA	Load RetroActively
LRB	Lose Record and Branch
LRD	Load Random Data
LSPSW	Load and Scramble PSW
LTS	Link To Sputnik
LTS	Loop Till Smokes
LUM	LUbricate Memory
LWE	Load WhatEver
LWM	Load Write-only Memory
MAB	Melt Address Bus
MAN	Make Animal Noises
MAZ	Multiply Answer by Zero
MBC	Make Batch Confetti
MBF	Multiply and Be Fruitful
MBH	Memory Bank Hold-up
MBTD	Mount Beatles on Tape Drive
MBTOL	Move Bug To Operator's Lunch
MC	Move Continuous
MD	Move Devious
MDB	Move and Drop Bits
MDC	Make Disk Crash
MDDHAF	Make Disk Drive Hop Across Floor
MFO	Mount Female Operator
MLB	Memory Left shift and Branch
MLP	Make Lousy Program
MLP	Multiply and Lose Precision
MLR	Move and Lose Record
MMF	Melt Main Frame
MMLG	Make Me Look Good
MNI	Misread Next Instruction
MOG	Make Operator Growl
MOP	Modify Operator's Personality
MOU	MOunt User [causes computer to screw you]
MPLP	Make Pretty Light Pattern
MRZ	Make Random Zap
MSGD	Make Screen Go Dim
MSP	Mistake Sign for Parity
MSPI	Make Sure Plugged In
MSR	Melt Special Register
MST	Mount Scotch Tape
MT%HRDV	Mag Tape \(em High speed Rewind and Drop Vaccuum
MTE	Mangle Tape on Exit
MTI	Make Tape Invalid
MUG	Make Ugly Graphics
MUM	Multi-Use Mnemonics
MW	Malfunction Whenever
MW	Multiply Work
MWAG	Make Wild-Assed Guess
MWC	Move and Wrap Core
MWT	Malfunction Without Telling
NBC	Negate By Clearing
NCW	Notch Carriage and Way
NMI	Negate Most Integers
NOP	Needlessly Omit Pointer
NPC	Normalize Program Counter
NPN	No Program Necessary [VAX]
NTGH	Not Tonight, i've Got a Headache
OBB	Overflow Bit Bucket
OCF	Open Circular File
OMC	Obscene Message to Console
OMC	Overheat Memory Chip
OML	Obey Murphy's Laws
OPI	Order Pizza Immediately
OPP	Order Pizza for Programmer
OSI	Overflow Stack Immediate
OSI	Overflow Stack Indefinite
OSP	Open Six-Pack
OTL	Out To Lunch
OU	Offend User
P$*!	Punch Obscenity
PA	Punch in ASCII
PAL	Pack And Leave
PAS	Print And Smear
PAUD	PAUse Dramatically
PAZ	Pack Alpha Zone
PAZ	Pack Alpha and drop Zones
PBC	Print and Break Chain
PBD	Print and Break Drum
PBL	Pack Bags and Leave
PBM	Pop Bubble Memory
PBPBPBP	Place Backup in Plain Brown Paper Bag Please
PBST	Play Batch mode Star Trek
PCB	Pause for Coffee Break
PCD	PunCh Disk
PCI	Pleat Cards Immediate
PCR	Print and Cut Ribbon
PCS	Push to Centre of Stack
PD	Play Dead
PD	Punch Disk
PDLD	Power Down and Lock Door [to computer room]
PDSK	Punch DiSK
PEHC	Punch Extra Holes in Cards
PEP	Print on Edge of Paper
PFD	Punt on Fourth Down
PFE	Print Floating Eye
PFML	Print Four Million Lines
PG	Print Garbage
PHO	Pull Hair Out
PI	Punch Invalid
PIBM	Pretend to be an IBM
PIC	Print Illegible Characters
PIC	Print Invalid Character
PIC	Punch Invalid Character
PLSC	Perform Light Show on Console
PNIH	Place Needle In Haystack
PNRP	Print Nasty Replies to Programmer
PO	Punch Operator
POCL	Punch Out Console Lights
POG	Print Only Greek
POP	Pop Or Push
POPI	Punch OPerator Immediate
POPN	Punch OPerator's Nose
PPA	Print Paper Airplanes
PPC	Purge Pascal Compiler [HP 3000]
PPL	Perform Perpetual Loop
PPP	Print Programmer's Picture
PPR	Play Punk Rock
PPSW	Pack Program Status Word
PPSW	Pack Progran Status Word
PRS	PRint and Smear
PSP	Print and Shred Paper
PSR	Print and Shred Ribbon
PTP	Produce Toilet Paper
PUO	Perform Unknown Operation
PVLC	Punch Variable Length Card
PWP	Print Without Paper
PWS	create PoWer Surge
PYS	Program YourSelf
QBDH	Quit and Become a DeadHead
QWYA	Quit While Your Ahead
RA	Randomize Answer
RAM	Read Ambiguous Memory
RAN	RANdom opcode [similar to 16-bit what gate]
RASC	Read And Shred Card
RAST	Read And Shred Tape
RAU	Ridicule All Users
RBAO	Ring Bell and Annoy Operator
RBLY	Restore Back-up from Last Year
RBT	Read Blank Tape
RBT	Rewind and Break Tape
RC	Rewind Core
RCAJ	Read Card And Jam
RCB	Read Command Backwards
RCB	Run Clock Backwards
RCC	Read Card and Chew
RCCP	Randomly Corrupt Current Process
RCF	Rewind Cabinet Fans
RCKG	Read Count Key and Garbage
RCL	Rotate Carry Left
RCP	Reschedule Car Payments
RCR	Rewind Card Reader
RCRV	Randomly Convert to Reverse Video
RCS	Read Card & Scramble data
RCSD	Read Card, Scramble Data
RD	Randomize Data
RD	Reverse Directions
RDA	Refuse to Disclose Answer
RDB	Replace Database with Blanks
RDB	Run Disk Backwards
RDD	Reverse Disk Drive
RDDBF	Rock Disk Drive Back and Forth
RDEB	Read and Drop Even number of Bits
RDF	Randomize Directory Filenames
RDI	Reverse Drum Immediate
RDI	Reverse Drun Immediate
RDI	Rewind Disk Immediate
RDR	Reverse Disk Rotation
RDS	ReaD Sideways
RENVR	REName Variables Randomly
RET	Read and Erase Tape
RF	Read Fingerprints
RG	Record Garbage
RHNEZ	Randomize and Halt if Not Equal to Zero
RHO	Randomize and Hold all Output
RIC	Rotate Illogical thru Carry
RID	Read Invalid Data
RIG	Read Inter-record Gap
RIOP	Rotate I/O Ports
RIR	Read Invalid Record
RIRG	Read Inter-Record Gap
RJE	Return Jump and Explode
RLC	Relocate and Lose Core
RLC	Reread Last Card
RLC	Rotate Left with Carolyn
RLI	Rotate Left Indefinitely
RLP	Refill Light Pen
RLP	Rewind Line Printer
RM	Ruin My files
RMI	Randomize Memory Immediate
RMM	Read Manager's Mind
RMT	ReMove Trap
RMV	Remove Memory Virtues
RN	Read Noise
RNBS	Reflect Next Bus Signal
RNR	Read Noise Record
ROC	Randomize Op Codes
ROC	Rotate Outward from Center
ROD	ROtate Diagonally
ROM	Read Operator's Mind
ROO	Rub Out Operator
ROOP	Run Out Of Paper
ROPF	Read Other People's Files
ROS	Reject Operating System
ROS	Return On Shield
RP	Read Printer
RPB	Raise Parity Bits
RPB	Read Print and Blush
RPB	Reverse Parity and Branch
RPBR	Reverse Parity and BRanch
RPC	Rotate Program Counter
RPM	Read Programmer's Mind
RPU	Read character and Print Upsidedown
RRC	Rotate Random thru Carry
RRR	Randomly Rotate Register
RRR	Read Record and Run away
RRR	Read Record and Run-away
RRRL	Random Rotate Register Left
RRRR	Random Rotate Register Right
RRSGWSSNK	Round and Round She Goes, Where She Stops, Nobody Knows
RRSTC	Return on Ruby Slippers Triple-Click
RRT	Record and Rip Tape
RS	Random Slew
RSD	on Read error Self-Destruct
RST	Rewind and Stretch Tape
RSTOM	Read from STore-Only Memory
RT	Reduce Throughput
RTP	Reduce ThroughPut
RTS	Return To Sender
RVAC	Return from VACation
RWC	ReWind and Crash heads
RWCR	ReWind Card Reader
RWD	ReWind Disk
RWE	Run Without Error
RWF	Read Wrong File
RWT	Read/Write while stretching Tape
SA	Store Anywhere
SAD	Search And Destroy
SAI	Skip All Instructions
SAK	Snooze At Keyboard
SAS	Show Appendix Scar
SAS	Sit And Spin
SBE	Swap Bits Erratically
SBF	Skip on Bitbucket Full
SC	Scramble Channels
SC	Shred Cards
SCB	Spindle Card and Belch
SCCA	Short Circuit on Correct Answer
SCD	Shuffle and Cut Dec
SCH	Slit Cards Horizontal
SCI	Shred Cards Immediate
SCM	Set for Crash Mode
SCOM	Set Cobol-Only Mode
SCP	SCatter Printer
SCRRC	SCRamble Register Contents
SCST	Switch Channel to Star Trek
SCTR	Stick Card To Reader
SD	Scramble Directory
SD	Slip Disk
SDC	Spool Disk to Console
SDD	Seek and Destroy Data
SDD	Spin Disc Dry
SDDB	Snap Disk Drive Belt
SDE	Solve Differential Equations
SDI	Self Destruct Immediate
SDM	Search and Destroy Memory
SDR	Slam Down Rondo [worst soda ever made]
SEB	Stop Eating and Burp
SEOB	Set Every Other Bit
SESUR	Sing Elvis Songs Until he Returns
SEX	Set EXecution register
SEX	Sign EXtend
SFH	Set Flags to Half-mast
SFP	Send For Pizza
SFR	Send For Reinforcements
SFT	Stall For Time
SFTT	Strip Form Tractor Teeth
SHAB	SHift A Bit
SHABM	SHift A Bit More
SHB	Stop and Hang Bus
SHCD	SHuffle Card Deck
SHIT	Stop Here If Thursday
SHON	Simulate HONeywell CPU [permanent no-op]
SHR	SHift Random
SHRC	SHRed Card
SHRT	SHRed Tape
SID	Switch to Infinite Density
SIP	Store Indefinite Precision
SJV	Scramble Jump Vectors
SLP	Sharpen Light Pen
SMC	Scramble Memory Contents
SMD	Spontaneous Memory Dump
SMR	Skip on Meaningless Result
SMS	Shred Mylar Surface
SNAFU	System Needs A Fuck-Up
SNARF	System Normalize And Reset Flags
SNM	Show No Mercy
SNO	Send Nukes on Overflow
SOAWP	SOlve All the World'd Problems
SOB	Shit On Byte
SOB	Stew On Brew
SOD	Surrender Or Die
SOI	Screw O'coin Intentional [personal one]
SOL	Shift On Low
SOL	Shit Out of Luck
SOP	Stop and Order Pizza
SOS	Sign Off, Stupid
SOT	Sit On a Tack
SP	Scatter Print
SPA	Sliding Point Arithmetic
SPB	Simulate Peanut Butter
SPD	SPin Disc
SPS	Set Panel Switches
SPSW	Scramble Program Status Word
SQPWYC	Sit Quietly and Play With Your Crayons
SRBO	Set Random Bits to Ones
SRBZ	Set Random Bits to Zeroes
SRC	Select Random Channel
SRC	Select Reader and Chew cards
SRCC	Select Reader and Chew Cards
SRD	Switch to Random Density
SRDR	Shift Right Double Ridiculous
SRO	Sort with Random Ordering
SROS	Store in Read-Only Storage
SRR	Shift Registers Random
SRSD	Seek Record and Scar Disk
SRSD	Seek Record and Scratch Disk
SRTC	Stop Real-Time Clock
SRU	Signoff Random User
SRZ	Subtract & Reset to Zero
SRZ	Subtract and Reset to Zero
SSB	Scramble Status Byte
SSD	Scratch System Disk
SSD	Stacker Select Disk
SSD	Stop and Scratch Disk [3815]
SSJ	Select Stacker & Jam
SSJ	Select Stacker and Jam
SSJP	Select Stacker and JumP
SSM	Solve by Supernatural Means
SSM	Stacker Select Memory
SSP	Seek SPindle
SSP	Smoke and SPark
SST	Seek and Stretch Tape
SSW	Scramble Status Word
ST	Set and Test
STA	STore Anywhere
STC	Slow To a Crawl
STD	Stop, Take Drugs
STM	STretch Magtape
STM	Skip on Third Monday
STO	Strangle Tape Operator
STPR	SToP Rain
STRIKE	STRIKE for more pay, better hours, etc.
STROM	STore in Read-Only Memory
STTHB	Set Terminal to Three Hundred Baud
SUIQ	Subtract User's IQ
SUME	SUprise ME
SUP	Shred User Printout
SUP	Solve Unsolvable Problem
SUR	Screw Up Royally
SUS	Stop Until Spring
SUS	Subtract Until Senseless
SWAT	SWAp Terminals
SWN	SWap Nibbles
SWOS	Store in Write-Only Storage
SWS	Sort to Wrong Slots
SWT	Select Wrong Terminal
SWU	Select Wrong Unit
SWZN	Skip Whether Zero or Not
SZD	Switch to Zero Density
TAH	Take A Hike
TAI	Trap Absurd Inputs
TARC	Take Arithmetic Review Course
TBFTG	Two Burgers and Fries To Go
TC	Transmit Colors
TDB	Transfer and Drop Bits
TDRB	Test and Destroy Random Bits
TDS	Trash Data Segment
TET	Triple Execution Time [SUN]
TLNF	Teach me a Lesson i'll Never Forget
TLO	Turn indicator Lights Off
TLW	Transfer and Lose Way
TN	Take a Nap
TOAC	Turn Off Air Conditioner
TOG	Take Out Garbage
TOG	Time Out, Graduate
TOH	Take Operator Hostage
TOO	Turn On/off Operator
TOP	Trap OPerator
TOS	Trash Operating System
TOW	Take Over World
TPD	Terminal Printer Destruct
TPD	Total Program Diagnostic
TPD	Triple Pack Decimal
TPDH	Tell Programmer to Do it Himself
TPF	Turn Power oFf
TPN	Turn Power oN
TPO	Turn Power Off
TPR	Tear PapeR
TR	Turn into Rubbish
TRA	Te Rdls Arvs [type ridiculous abbreviations]
TRD	TRansfer and Drop bit
TSH	Trap Secretary and Halt
TSM	Trap Secretary and Mount
TST	Trash System Tracks
TT%CN	TeleType \(em Clunk Noise
TT%EKB	TeleType \(em Electrify KeyBoard
TTA	Try, Try Again
TTIHLIC	Try To Imagine How Little I Care
TTITT	Turn 2400 foot Tape Into Two 1200 foot Tapes
TTL	Tap Trunk Line
TTL	Time To Logoff
TYF	Trust Your Feelings
UA	Unload Accumulator
UAI	Use Alternate Instruction set
UAPA(AM)	Use All Power Available (And More)
UCB	Uncouple CPU and Branch
UCIP	Update Card In Place
UCK	Unlock Console Keyswitch
UCLB	Uncouple Comm Lines & Branch
UCPUB	Uncouple CPUs and Branch
UDR	Update and Delete Record
UER	Update and Erase Record
UFO	Unidentified Flag Operation
ULDA	UnLoaD Accumulator
UMR	Unlock Machine Room
UNPD	UNPlug and Dump
UOP	Useless OPeration
UP	Understand Program[mer]
UPA	Use all Power Available
UPC	Understand Program[mer]'s Comments
UPI	Undo Previous Instruction
URB	Update, Resume and Branch
UTF	Unwind Tape onto Floor
UTF	Use The Force
UUBR	Use Undefined Base Register
VAX	Violate All eXecutions
VFE	Violate Field Engineer
VFO	Violate Female Operator
VMA	Violate Maintenance Agreement
VNO	Violate Noise Ordinance
VPA	Vanishing Point Arithmetic
VVM	Vaporize Virtual Memory
WAD	Walk Away in Disgust
WAT	WAste Time
WBB	Write to the Bit Bucket
WBT	Water Binary Tree
WC	Waste Core
WCR	Write to Card Reader
WDR	Warp disk DRive
WED	Write and Erase Data
WEMG	Write Eighteen Minute Gap
WF	Wait Forever
WGPB	Write Garbage in Process-control Block
WHFO	Wait until Hell Freezes Over
WHP	Wave Hands over Program
WI	Why Immediate
WI	Write Illegibly
WID	Write Invalid Data
WMC	Write Millions of Comments
WNAM	We Need A Miracle
WNHR	Write New Hit Record
WNR	Write Noise Record
WP	Write Poop
WPET	Write Past End of Tape
WPM	Write Programmer's Mind
WSE	Write Stack Everywhere
WSWW	Work in Strange and Wonderous Ways
WSWW	Work in Strange and Wondrous Ways
WUPO	Wad Up Printer Output
WWLR	Write Wrong Length Record
WWR	Write Wrong Record
XXIO	eXecute Invalid Opcode
XXKF	eXecute Kermit the Frog
XXM	eXclusive Maybe
XXMB	eXclusive MayBe
XXOH	eXecute no-Op and Hang
XXOR	eXecute OpeRator
XXOS	eXchange Operator's Sex
XXPR	eXecute PRogrammer
XXPSW	eXecute Program Status Word
XXSP	eXecute Systems Programmer
XXVF	eXchange Virtue for Fun
YAB	Yet Another Bug
YASE	Yet Another Stupid Error
ZAP	Zero and Add Packed
ZAR	Zero Any Register
ZD	Zap Directory
ZEOW	Zero Every Other Word
ZPI	ZaP Immediate
SHAR_EOF
chmod 0600 opcodes ||
echo 'restore of opcodes failed'
Wc_c="`wc -c < 'opcodes'`"
test 30154 -eq "$Wc_c" ||
	echo 'opcodes: original size 30154, current size' "$Wc_c"
fi
# ============= mkman ==============
if test -f 'mkman' -a X"$1" != X"-c"; then
	echo 'x - skipping mkman (File already exists)'
else
echo 'x - extracting mkman (Text)'
sed 's/^X//' << 'SHAR_EOF' > 'mkman' &&
#!/bin/sh
#-------
# Read the opcodes file on stdin, write man page on stdout.
#-------
X
cat <<\!BEG!
.TH OPCODES 7
.SH NAME
opcodes \- assembler opcodes that ought to exist
.\" .SH SYNOPSIS
.SH DESCRIPTION
.\"-------
.\" Tt	- max width of tag
.\" Tw	- max width of tag + spacing to the paragraph
.\" .Op name desc
.\"	Prints the given tag with the given description.
.\"-------
.nr Tt \w'RRSGWSSNK'
.nr Tw \w'RRSGWSSNK\0\0\0'
.de Op
.TP \n(Twu
.B \\$1
\\$2
..
.PP
This man page lists various assembly language opcodes that
many people have either suspected existed (in their nightmares)
or wished existed (in their dreams).
.PP
.PD 0
!BEG!
X
sed	's/^\(.*\)	\(.*\)$/.Op "\1" "\2"/' ${1+"$@"}
X
cat <<\!END!
.PD
.SH AUTHOR
Man page by
DaviD W. Sanderson	(dws\|@cs.wisc.edu)
.SH COPYRIGHT
\&
.br
This collection is
.if n (C)
.if t \s+8\v'+2p'\fB\(co\fR\v'-2p'\s0
\s+2Copyright 1992 by DaviD W. Sanderson\s0
(but freely redistributable)
!END!
X
Xexit 0
SHAR_EOF
chmod 0700 mkman ||
echo 'restore of mkman failed'
Wc_c="`wc -c < 'mkman'`"
test 946 -eq "$Wc_c" ||
	echo 'mkman: original size 946, current size' "$Wc_c"
fi
exit 0
-- 
DaviD W. Sanderson (dws@cs.wisc.edu)
Newsgroups: rec.humor