From: Barbara.Akin@p0.f89.n129.z1.fidonet.org (Barbara Akin)
Newsgroups: misc.handicap
Subject: Re: Mobility
Date: 15 Dec 92 19:33:45 GMT
Reply-To: Barbara.Akin@p0.f89.n129.z1.fidonet.org
Organization: FidoNet node 1:129/89.0 - BlinkLink, Pittsburgh PA
X-Fidonet: Blink Talk Conference
Originator: wtm@sheldev.shel.isc-br.com

Index Number: 26819

[This is from the Blink Talk Conference]

CA>percentage-wise.  I don't know though.  I don't know if mobility and
CA>depression are relat4ed, except that depression lowers a person's self-estee
CA>and it takes self-esteem to get out there and mobilize, that's for sure.  I
CA>did read a statistic a log time ago that around 90 percent of blind women
CA>remain single.  I don't know how true that is now.  This might be a fertile
CA>field for some aspiring sociologist, if we could ever find one that didn't
CA>have the typical stereotypical ideas about blindness in the first place.

CA>Carol

CA>--- QuickBBS 2.76 (Gamma-3)
CA> * Origin: The Overworked Dragon BBS (503)256-8451 PDX (1:105/56)

Hi Carol,
Here's some food for thought on this subject that we could kick around.
I've been blind since shortly after birth, I've been married for 10
years, (now divorced) not because of blindness either, it was abuse, I
have two wonderful girls, and I get depressed!
I get depressed I think for some Very valid reasons.
1. It is still Twice (or should I say ten) times harder for blind people
to land jobs as it is for the sighted population.
Its even Harder when you're a woman!
2. Our society still has some pretty wierd ideas about blindness and us
in general.
Let me tell you a story that happened a longtime ago, but one I will
never forget.
I was twenty one, out there tryingto make my way in the world, was in
college, and was working nights as a musician.
One night, as I was comming home to my apartment in a taxi, the cab
driver asked, as he pulled up to my place, "Can I ask you a personal
question?"
I said yes (stupid as I was then, smile) and so this idot says "Uh, I've
always wondered--do you people have sex the same way?"

The rage and humiliation in me was beond words.
So I said gruffly, "Turn around!" "Look at me!" Don't I look like any
other female to you?"
"There's your answer!"
I went into the house and cried!
O k, now another side of this coin should be told, so I don't leave you
all feeling lower than mud!
Another story from my past--
I was sitting at the bar at this club I use to go into every once in
awhile.
Pretty soon, a guy came over and sat down beside me.
He said, "Do you mind if I say something?"
And I thought--oh no, here we go again!
But, instead I was most wonderfully, warmly and very suprised, when he
said, "You know, I've seen you in here a few times, and when I first saw
you, I just saw you as a blind person.
Then I realized that you were a very attractive sexy woman!?
He said he had forgotten about the blindness, and had started seeing my
body rather than my disability!
(lets hope he appreciated my mind as well, but then again, you can't see
that at a glance, ha ha!)

But, I think us women who are disabled, whether it be blindness, or some
other obvious disability do go through a lot, and anyone could
get depressed!!
Lack of jobs, sexuality issues, God knows, I could go on and on, but the
point here is that I feel good about myself, and I tend to suspect that
as I project that immage, most folks with any brain upstairs will feel
the same way.
But, you're right, this would be an interesting topic to maybe look
into.

Maybe it might even be enlightening if we all got together and composed
a book with these kinds of stories in it, explaining what life is Really
like for disabled women!
No, its not an easy road, that is for sure, but it is not all gloom and
doom either, I sure don't want to leave that impression on anyone!
-!-
 ~ SLMR 2.0 ~ Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (P)anic

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