HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Date:         Tue, 26 Jan 1993 14:32:15 EST
From:         "Peter H. Brenton" <pete@BIOCHEM.UCHICAGO.EDU>
Subject:      Re: No Subject

I agree with MW (Stop shouting-only in part-read on).  The German has to go (or
 at least include subtitles).  This should be a pseudo-intellectual venue, not
 one which requires any degree of true learning.

Regarding the rest of that person's message, she/he should realize that
 tasteless humor is often supressed despite it's poignancy simply because it is
 tasteless.  I think MW would counter that if that particular example had been
 GOOD humor he/she would not have had as much of a problem.

As a student of Psychology, I did admire the pseudo-clinical psychological
 terminolgy MW used to describe  ye folk (us folk?) "insecurity-inferiority"
 wow, as meaningless a noise as has ever come down th pseudo-intellectual
 pipeline.

Finally, in an attempt to bring truly interesting humor to this list, here is a
 little item which some have probably seen already;



----- Begin Included Message -----


=======================================================================

Return-Path: <jcb@vertigo>
Date: Wed, 2 Dec 92 11:12:42 EST
From: jcb@vertigo (John Barstow)
To: core@vertigo, home@vertigo, port@vertigo
Subject: humor

My brother forwarded this to me today ...

-------------

WHAT DRIVING TO THE STORE WOULD BE LIKE IF OPERATING SYSTEMS RAN YOUR CAR

>> MS-DOS:  You get in the car and try to remember where you put your keys.

>> Windows:  You get in the car and drive to the store very slowly, because
   attached to the back of the car is a freight train.

>> Macintosh System 7:  You get in the car to go to the store, and the car
   drives you to church.

>> UNIX:  You get in the car and type GREP STORE.  After reaching speeds of
   200 miles per hour en route, you arrive at the barber shop.

>> Windows NT:  You get in the car and write a letter that says, "go to the
   store."  Then you get out of the car and mail the letter to your
   dashboard.

>> Taligent/Pink:  You walk to the store with Ricardo Montalban, who tells
   you how wonderful it will be when he can fly you to the store in his
   Learjet.

>> OS/2:  After fueling up with 6000 gallons of gas, you get in the car and
   drive to the store with a motorcycle escort and a marching band in
   procession.  Halfway there, the car blows up, killing everybody in town.

>> S/36 SSP [mainframe, obv.]:  You get in the car and drive to the store.

   Halfway there you run out of gas.  While walking the rest of the way,
   you are run over by kids on mopeds.

>> OS/400:  An attendant locks you into the car and then drives you to the
   store, where you get to watch everybody else buy filet mignons.


----- End Included Message -----
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Date:         Thu, 28 Jan 1993 10:42:00 -06
From:         Dana Rollins <ROLLIDE@AUDUCADM.DUC.AUBURN.EDU>
Subject:      Reply to Nitrous Oxide--no la

>
There has been much on this newslist which i for one have
found to be somewhat objectionable.  Personally, i think
it was a mistake to let this sort of unrestrained nihilistic
chaotic rambling to go unmoderated for so long!  It starts
perhaps, with Martin Luther or Copernicus, but it ends up
with Robert Mapplethorpe!

The last straw, for me, was the irresponsible and scurrilious
casual reference to the anesthetic gas, nitrous oxide, commonly
referred to in the popular parlance as "laughing gas".

This sort of casual drug reference is just the sort of thing
which encourages our young people, many of whom are currently
reading these messages through the terminals they are provided
with at their local university or community college, and this
is happening at a time in there lives when some of them are
very impressionable about such things as casual sex and illicit
drug use.  I find this very frustrating, given my background in
research into the psychology of human drug addictions.  My
research indicates that much of our drug problems are due to
incorrect socialization practices, such as what I am seeing on
this newslist.

I call for the moderator to step in at this point and help
alleviate some of this serious, serious problem.

.............................................................
:  Otto Dailey          |   Pharmacological Research Dept.    :
:  Ph.D.  Staff         |   Mayo Clinic                       :
:  Researcher           |   voice  (714) 831-6642             :
:  odailey@n2o.mayo.edu |   fax    (714) 835-4000             :
.............................................................

*** Comments from MOOOO  01/28/93 10:39am:
Dear Otto (hey!  your name is the same backwards and forwards!)
You said "there lives".
It should've been "THEIR lives".
Just trying to help.

Please,
No Flames,

Merci
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Date:         Thu, 28 Jan 1993 10:15:13 EST
From:         General Mills <LIBALP@EMUVM1.BITNET>
Subject:      Re: WHAT!?
              28 Jan 1993 09:04:40 CST from <Pamela.Koch@ACENET.AUBURN.EDU>

On Thu, 28 Jan 1993 09:04:40 CST Pamela Koch said:
>----------
>
>QUICK!  HELP ME PULL HIM BACK ON HIS ROCKER, GUYS!
>
>AND GIVE THAT WITCH SOME LAUGHING GAS & GET 'ER OUTA HERE!
>
>(And get some screens for this place; you never know
>WHAT's going to fly in next, fer cryin out loud!)

Ah!  We know who you are and we know who you've been with.

Still watching,
gm
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Date:         Thu, 28 Jan 1993 11:18:04 -0500
From:         jsmith@Q415.BETHESDAM.EDU
Subject:      Our Apologies for Mr. Dailey's Post...

Greetings.  I represent the Bethesda Mental Hospital, a teaching
hospital here in Maryland for Graduate Student Training in Therapy
for the Severely Disturbed.

One of our patients here, Mr. Otto Dailey, has been participating
in a program in cooperation with the Mayo Clinic in which select
patients (those with an I.Q. of 120 or greater, Stanford-Binet)
are given accounts on a host at the Mayo Clinic where they perform
personality inventories designed as a tetris-like game where their
responses are keyed to the letters 'A' through 'F'.

Mr. Dailey, having an I.Q. of 197 apparently has discovered some
way to access the mail services of the host machine at the Mayo
clinic and has been sending mail out all over the net.  We were
waiting this morning for him to try, in order to ensure that it
was in fact Mr. Dailey, and not a hacker using his account.

We sincerely apologize for any inconvenience this may have caused.

Jacklyn Smith
Program Director
Bethesda Mental Hospital
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Date:         Thu, 28 Jan 1993 16:18:51 -0600
From:         Scotto <MOORE7004@ISCSVAX.UNI.EDU>

>GET ME OF THIS FUCKING LIST ALREADY!
>ISN"T THERE A DAMN POSTMASTER WHO READS
>THIS OR A LISTSERVER THAT FUNCTIONS?

Listen, mwitten -- can I call you "wit," or would that be entirely
inappropriate? -- there's no damn postmaster who reads this, there's no
listserver that functions, there's no God, there's no Santa Claus, Tooth Fairy,
etc, there are no new ways to think, but most of all, wit, there's no "I" in
the word "team," and maybe it's time we all come to understanding about that.


Okay, 'fess up, how many other lurkers are out there just waiting to cry out in
despair at the pointless sludge this list produces?  Come on, we know you're
out there, it's only a matter of time...
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Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Date:         Thu, 28 Jan 1993 11:11:01 EST
From:         CENSORED@CENSORED.CENSORED.EDU
Subject:      Re: Nitrous Oxide--no laughing matter
              28 Jan 1993 11:07:20 -0500 from <odailey@N2O.MAYO.EDU>

On Thu, 28 Jan 1993 11:07:20 -0500 <odailey@N2O.MAYO.EDU> said:
>There has been much on this newslist which i for one have
>found to be somewhat objectionable.  Personally, i think
>it was a mistake to let this sort of unrestrained nihilistic
>chaotic rambling to go unmoderated for so long!  It starts
>perhaps, with Martin Luther or Copernicus, but it ends up
>with Robert Mapplethorpe!
>
>The last straw, for me, was the irresponsible and scurrilious
>casual reference to the anesthetic gas, nitrous oxide, commonly
>referred to in the popular parlance as "laughing gas".
>
>This sort of casual drug reference is just the sort of thing
>which encourages our young people, many of whom are currently
>reading these messages through the terminals they are provided
>with at their local university or community college, and this
>is happening at a time in there lives when some of them are
>very impressionable about such things as casual sex and illicit
>drug use.  I find this very frustrating, given my background in
>research into the psychology of human drug addictions.  My
>research indicates that much of our drug problems are due to
>incorrect socialization practices, such as what I am seeing on
>this newslist.
>
>I call for the moderator to step in at this point and help
>alleviate some of this serious, serious problem.
>

I agree.  I, for one, found my recent reference to weasels extremely
offensive.  It hasn't been widely reported, but weasels in general
suffer a higher rate of addiction to laughing gas than any other
species of the genus Mustela.  Furthermore, weasels all over the
country are reading this in their little dens, chewing on sparrow
heads and laughing like crazy.  I think the moderator should step
in and forbid me from ever mentioning weasels again, lest I be held
responsible for some poor little weasel child loosing his daddy to
the hunter's snare.
Another thing that's offensive- the word "Furthermore".  Some of you
may recall the previous paragraph, in which the author made scandalous
reference to this problematic word.  "Furthermore" seems to be creeping
into more and more posts on this list, just as it crept into this
sentence- the very beginning of this sentence, mind you- almost without
my knowing it.  If we don't want to drown in a pustulant sea of
furthermores, I call on the narrator to ban this word forthwith.
We won't even talk about the word "forthwith".
There's been a lot of talk lately, too, about butterflies doing terrible
things to caterpillars.  Many butterflies have struggled long and hard
to overcome debilitating caterpillar addictions, and I for one do not
appreciate this serious social problem being treated as an opportunity
for sophomoric jocularity.
Take heed, Majcher- clean up this list, or I will.  I have munitions.

Cuthbert
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Date:         Thu, 28 Jan 1993 10:23:00 -06
From:         Dana Rollins <ROLLIDE@AUDUCADM.DUC.AUBURN.EDU>
Subject:      WHERE I LIVE

Well, we have a new Winn-Dixie Supermarket open here as of 7 a.m.
today.  Quite large, and will carry not only 47 varieties of mustard
(Honey, they've got that good champagne mustard we like so much!), but
will always have crawfish for sale in their "Fisherman's Wharf"!  Isn't
that cute?  Fisherman's Wharf - it's not a REAL wharf, silly, but their
seafood is guaranteed fresh and U.S.D.A. Government Inspected.  From
live Maine lobster to a wide assortment of fresh fish, Alaskan crab
legs, shrimp, shellfish, seafood salad and much more - you'll find the
freshest seafood and helpful recipe tips to prepare it all.
See?  It says right here:  "We also offer: *Cajun Crawfish *Amberjack
*Turbot *Shark *Rainbow Trout *Tuna *Grouper *Cajun or Lemon Marinated
Catfish *Peeled and Deveined Cooked Shrimp *King Crab Legs"!
And look at all these buy-one-get-one-free specials!
Not to mention 3 heads of lettuce for a dollar!

And Then My Boss Snatched The Newspaper Away From Me And Forced My Nose
Back To The Grindstone,

OUCH!

Hungry For Fish
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Newsgroups: bit.listserv.fnord-l
Date:         Wed, 27 Jan 1993 11:05:42 EST
From:         General Mills <LIBALP@EMUVM1.BITNET>
Subject:      Re: A true heart steps forward..

>here. I want you to feel good.  I want to make you happy.  Take my hand,
>dearest one.
>
>Now, take a warm bath.  Let me towel you off.  There.  Do you want a cookie?
>Ok, let's get you tucked into bed...  Where's your favorite book?  Feel better
>now, Melanie?  Ok, you can turn off the light now...  Sweet dreams.

Must we witness your goofy teenage fantasies, Lesser?
Stop being such a GUY for chrissakes.

And from CYNOVY:
>Or maybe a New Idea isn't something that can be manufactured, and maybe
>it's not recognizable to those who have toiled forever in old ideas,
>including this one, and maybe it's not much of an idea at all, as the
>idea of "idea" is pretty old, unless one keeps to a strict etymology,
>in which case we should define our terms.  Yup, that's it, I'd say.
>Nutshelled.

As we say: It's important to examine one's method and motivations.
And then there's also such a thing as having one's head up one's ass.
Thing is, some people read "FNORD" and sign up.  Others read "New Ways of
Thinking" and sign up.  Members of both groups come to suspect that they
have signed up for the wrong reason, and begin to wish they belonged to
the other group.  Both are wrong.  How can I make blanket statements like
that without regard for semantic hipness?  If someone cared maybe I wouldn't.
We speak German, but not E-Prime.  Alas, alas.

>Just sign me,
>"The Butterfly Tends to Think of the Caterpillar As Snackfood"

As does the Rabid Mutant Wart-Turkey from Planet X.

Reacting,
gm
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Newsgroups: bit.listserv.nettrain
Date:         Fri, 22 Jan 1993 15:45:00 CST
From:         Jim Milles <MILLESJG@SLUVCA.SLU.EDU>
Subject:      Re: Laptop/Datadisplay Combo

----------- Original message below forwarded by NETTRAIN moderator ------------

Date: 22 Jan 1993 12:37:45 U
From: Mike Hansen <Mike_Hansen.IS@it.berklee.edu>


On Thu, 21 Jan 1993 16:04 CST, PHOFFMAN@crcvms.unl.edu said:

>My institution is looking for a combination data display and laptop
>unit
>we can purchase. We had poor luck with a unit called the Rever Crusier,
>but haven't given up hope in finding a decent machine from a reputable
>company.  The unit need not have a color display -- just be portable,
>dependable, and reasonably priced.
>If you have knowledge (and hopefully personal experience with) a
>machine
>like this, I'd appreciate a prompt reply at the address displayed
>below.
>If a conversation on this topic occurred recently, I'd welcome hearing
>the results (in a nutshell, of course).
>With thanks,
>Paul

        Reply to:   RE>Laptop/Datadisplay Combo
What do you want to use it for?

For our purposes, the new Apple PowerBook Duos with external displays
will do great. Hooking them up to a projection monitor or LCD tablet
seems like a very good presentation system. Should be very light and
reliable. (Was playing with a 230 yesterday.)

--------------------------------------
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.nettrain
From: ANTISTEC@ctrvx1.Vanderbilt.Edu (ANTISTEC)
Subject:      Question about the USENET gateway
Organization: Vanderbilt University
Date: Thu, 21 Jan 1993 21:45:51 GMT

OK: I know this list was recently "gated" to USENET (by someone at Wash U. I
believe).  In fact, I'm using my newsreader right now to write this.  Could
the person responsible or anyone with knowledge of such arcane functions
please e-mail me some info on how this is done?  I'd like to do the same
thing for a number of education-related Bitnet lists by gating them to local
newsgroups.  I don't even want to think about getting them passed along
through the system for now, just making them available locally to our K-12
teachers.  Our local news "guru" isn't to sure how to go about this and I'd
like to present him with som hard facts.

Thanks,

David Antis

antistec@ctrvax.vanderbilt.edu


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Date:         Thu, 21 Jan 1993 17:10:00 CST
From:         NETTRAIN <MILLESJG@SLUVCA.SLU.EDU>
Subject:      New Clinton Posting

----------- Original message below forwarded by NETTRAIN moderator ------------

Date: Thu, 21 Jan 93 09:42:15 CST
From: "Michael S. Hart" <HART@vmd.cso.uiuc.edu>

Project Gutenberg has made eight corrections to yesterday's posting of
Clinton's Inaugural Address.

ftp mrcnext.cso.uiuc.edu
login anonymous
password yourname@your.machine
cd etext/etext93
get clinton2.txt
quit


=====================================================

Thank you for your interest,

Michael S. Hart, Professor of Electronic Text
Executive Director of Project Gutenberg Etext
Illinois Benedictine College, Lisle, IL 60532
No official connection to U of Illinois--UIUC
hart @uiucvmd.bitnet or hart@vmd.cso.uiuc.edu
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Newsgroups: bit.listserv.nettrain
Date:         Tue, 26 Jan 1993 16:12:00 CST
From:         NETTRAIN <MILLESJG@SLUVCA.SLU.EDU>
Subject:      Tips on ftp training

----------- Original message below forwarded by NETTRAIN moderator ------------

Date: Tue, 26 Jan 93 11:30:42 MST
From: Skip <DUSKNOX%IDBSU.BITNET@UBVM.cc.buffalo.edu>

I'm looking for guides and advice on training users to use anonymous
FTP.  I have an outline and such, and plenty of experience, so mostly
I'm looking for ideas and perspectives more than a place to begin.

But I do also have one specific problem.  I'll be in a room with 20
users at 20 machines.  If everyone tries to FTP to the same place, we'll
have problems.  How have trainers dealt with this?  Every approach I
can think of seems to present its own difficulties.  I could give each
person a different place to go.  I could use a projector and just have
them watch me do it.  I could try to find a place that would accept
20 simultaneous logins (!).  Or I could cancel class.  :-)

Any ideas?

Ellis "Skip" Knox       dusknox@idbsu.idbsu.edu
PC Coordinator & Faculty Computer Lab Supervisor
Professor of History
Boise State University  Boise, Idaho
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Date:         Thu, 28 Jan 1993 20:25:00 CST
From:         NETTRAIN <MILLESJG@SLUVCA.SLU.EDU>
Subject:      Decentralization

----------- Original message below forwarded by NETTRAIN moderator ------------

Date: Thu, 28 Jan 93  16:12:42 CST
From: Terri Cameron <GH0225%SPRINGB.BITNET@UBVM.cc.buffalo.edu>


We have just found out this week that our department will be decentralized,
with programmers moved into some as yet undefined administrative areas
around the institution and that Office Visions, DW370 and our other
office automation systems will also be taken away from our users at some
as yet undefined point, probably in the next couple of years.

Although it's pretty apparent that our Dean's mind is made up, I have
been assured that he is interested in any feedback about institutions
who have already decentralized, particularly as to how they have handled
issues such as campus-wide calendars, e-mail and bulletin boards.  I
think it would also be interesting to see how many institutions there
really are out there who do not have a centralized computing area that
includes programming support.  We are only talking about 5 programmers
for 1,200 users with some pretty diverse needs.

So, I am scanning indexes of journals looking for articles and thought
I'd ask people who might have gone through this already.

I'd appreciate any comments you can send.

Thank you.

Terri Cameron                                              PHONE: 217/782-2419
Departmental Information Supervisor                          FAX: 217/785-5561
Computing Services                                      BITNET: GH0225@SPRINGB
P.O. Box 19230                         INTERNET:GH0225%SPRINGB@SIUCVMB.SIU.EDU
Springfield, IL 62794-9230
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Date:         Wed, 27 Jan 1993 19:26:00 CST
From:         NETTRAIN <MILLESJG@SLUVCA.SLU.EDU>
Subject:      Re: History

----------- Original message below forwarded by NETTRAIN moderator ------------

From: nsteinberger@theo.jtsa.edu
Subject: History


Please explain in more detail what you want. The "history" of our installation
of the Internet goes back just a few months. We are connected via NYSERNet.
I would also be interested in a video regarding training on the Net and
using it.

Naomi M. Steinberger
Jewish Theological Seminary Library
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Date:         Thu, 28 Jan 1993 08:44:00 CST
From:         NETTRAIN <MILLESJG@SLUVCA.SLU.EDU>
Subject:      February Hunt Coming

----------- Original message below forwarded by NETTRAIN moderator ------------

Date: Thu, 28 Jan 93 00:48:39 PST
From: lb05gate%UCSBUXA.BITNET@UBVM.cc.buffalo.edu (Rick Gates)

*****************************************************************
*                                                               *
*                       THE INTERNET HUNT                       *
*                                                               *
*                       for February, 1993                      *
*                                                               *
*        (will be released on January 31, at Midnight PST)      *
*                                                               *
*****************************************************************

For those wishing fast access to the Hunt, try the Gopher server at
CICNet, in the U.S.
------------------------------------------------------------------
Rick Gates                              (805) 893-7225
Dir. of Library Automation
Univ. of California Library
Santa Barbara, CA  93106                lb05gate@ucsbuxa.ucsb.edu
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Date:         Sat, 23 Jan 1993 13:10:00 CST
From:         NETTRAIN <MILLESJG@SLUVCA.SLU.EDU>
Subject:      Writing training guide

----------- Original message below forwarded by NETTRAIN moderator ------------

Date: 23 Jan 1993 12:09:09 -0500 (EST)
From: Gilpin Brown <BROWN@urvax.urich.edu>

Hi trainers,

We here at the University of Richmond have been charged with writing a
Computer Technology Master Plan for the University.  I have been asked to
help with the TRAINING portion of this document.  Can you briefly outline
what you do at you school in the training area.  Not just Internet training,
but
other computer/software/hardware training as well.
Videos, classes, any unusual stuff.

Thanks

Gilpin Brown
University of Richmond
brown@urvax.urich.edu

Please send replies directly to me, so as to not bog ddown the list
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Date:         Thu, 28 Jan 1993 20:26:00 CST
From:         NETTRAIN <MILLESJG@SLUVCA.SLU.EDU>
Subject:      Tel-Ed '93 Deadline Extended

----------- Original message below forwarded by NETTRAIN moderator ------------

Date: Thu, 28 Jan 1993 16:16:00 -0600 (CST)
From: Kathy Kothmann <kathyk@tenet.edu>


        The deadline for presentations for the Second International
Symposium on Telecommunications, InfoMart, Dallas, TX, USA, Nov '93,
has been extended until March 31, 1993.  A revised electronic Call for
Participation will be posted shortly on this and other lists.

Kathy Kothmann
kathyk@tenet.edu
Tel-Ed '93 Steering Committee
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