HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: sokay@cyclone.mitre.org (Stephen J. Okay)
Newsgroups: alt.suicide.holiday
Subject: Re: God, I wish I could sleep
Date: 17 Dec 92 22:48:50 GMT
Organization: Mitre Corporation, McLean, VA

In article <1992Dec14.181949.4232@pegasus.com> alto@pegasus.com (Andrea Ostensoe) writes:
>In article <1992Dec9.103908.19758@aber.ac.uk> azw@aber.ac.uk (Andrew Michael Woodward) writes:
>>>>I recently heard that deliberately smiling for two minutes every day as an 
>>>>exercise, ie don't wait for something nice/funny, just smile for two minutes 
If I do this, it get me in trouble, esp. here at work. People go into hiding
whenever I just start grinning from  ear to ear, because it almost unfailingly
means I'm up to something...even if I'm really not. Its good as an occasional
mindfuck exercise....other than that I've yet to really find a use for yet...

----Steve(Feeling more than a little predatory today)
-- 
---------
sokay@cyclone.mitre.org
		"Your Mind....My Playground" ---me 
Xref: sparky alt.suicide.holiday:3125 alt.angst:4874
From: jprovo@Gnu.ai.mit.edu (The Wandering Pedestal of Angst)
Newsgroups: alt.suicide.holiday
Subject: so here i go. don't you love the psuedo-followup?
Date: 16 Dec 1992 07:16:13 GMT
Organization: Russel Street UN*X and Caffeine
Distribution: world
NNTP-Posting-Host: wombat.gnu.ai.mit.edu
X-rumination: I guess I'll clip out the bogus references...
X-method: 1- acetomeniphen poisoning 2- nicotine poisoning 3- psuedophedrine overdose
X-comment: bite me.

_with tomorrow_, this mortal coil, from the final album, _blood_

It was more like a dream than reality
I must've thought it was a dream while you were here with me
When you were near I ddidn't think that you would leave
When you were gone it was too much to believe
So with tomorrow 
I will borrow
Another moment of joy & sorrow
And another dream and another
with tomorrow....

...sorry, i can't finish it.

just let me say that just as you don't know what ya got till it's gone, you
don't know what you really want until you get what you thought you did.
-- 
Disclaimer: "I'm the only one foolish enough to claim these opinions as mine."
jprovo@gnu.ai.mit.edu                                       jzp@gene.ummed.edu
    Russell Street UN*X Consultations and Development     (NIC handle: JZP)
                            Rev. Dkr. Nick LaRG0, ASC
From: alto@pegasus.com (Andrea Ostensoe)
Newsgroups: alt.suicide.holiday
Subject: Re: famous suicides
Date: 15 Dec 92 19:20:45 GMT
Organization: Pegasus,  Honolulu

In article <92348.153652NDP102@psuvm.psu.edu> Natalie P. <NDP102@psuvm.psu.edu> writes:
>How about people like Marilyn Monroe, Janis Joplin, Jim Morrison?
>Ok, so nobody's sure whether any of those were really suicides, but
>my mind would like to think that celebrities can be just as depressed
>as us "ordinary" folk...drug overdoses could so easily be suicides.
>
>========================================================================
>"So how can you bring back the dead and try to tell them you're sorry?"
>--Glen Danzig, "Less Than Zero"
>
>Natalie (NDP102@psuvm.psu.edu)
>========================================================================

I think Jim Morrison simply had heart failure and no drugs or alcohol
was found in his blood stream ..however..he may have jacked his body
around so much over the years..his heart just gave out..I think Marilyn
was an out and out suicide (or murder)..Janis Joplin was probably an
"accidental" suicide..for that matter I think everyone who smokes is
committing suicide..I offered a new idea to hubby who is forever
trying to quit smoking..

I said to him..Instead of saying.."I think I'll step outside and
have a smoke"..why don't you say.."I think I'll step outside and
work on getting CANCER!"..;->

he just said..thanks..and stepped outside to get cancer;-)


-- 
**************************************************************************
"I don't ask for much..just your heart on a silver platter;-)"
						-Kali
**************************************************************************
Newsgroups: alt.suicide.holiday
From: alto@pegasus.com (Andrea Ostensoe)
Subject: Re: Wouldn't it be fun...
Organization: Pegasus,  Honolulu
Date: Mon, 14 Dec 92 18:50:44 GMT

In article <1gahisINNgs0@cardamom.compnews.co.uk> MatchBox@compnews.co.uk (Phillip Leedell) writes:
>How strange...
>Maybe you should try alt.sick.joke.humourless ?
>--
>That Phil Leedell person



What was strange? you didn't include the post..was it about hanging around
the freeways dressed as the Grim Reaper?..funny..very funny.don't you
like Monty Python?

Don't you think Suicide *is* a sick joke?

It can be..


-- 
**************************************************************************
"I don't ask for much..just your heart on a silver platter;-)"
						-Kali
**************************************************************************
From: kay@bigwpi.WPI.EDU (k)
Newsgroups: alt.suicide.holiday
Subject: Re: famous suicides
Date: 12 Dec 1992 17:22:40 GMT
Organization: Project Quantum Gweep
NNTP-Posting-Host: bigwpi.wpi.edu

In article <1992Dec12.084507.24246@leland.Stanford.EDU> underdog@leland.Stanford.EDU (Dwight Joe) writes:
>In article <1gbsq0INNpui@controversy.math.lsa.umich.edu>
>elnitsky@math.lsa.umich.edu (Serge Elnitsky) writes:
>>  I'm sure this has been asked before, but... Has anyone compiled
>>a list of famous people who committed suicide? If so, can someone
>>please forward me a copy. If not, let's compile one...
>>                                                         S.E.
>
>Here are some from the top of my head:
>
>(1) Alan Turing -- considered by many to be one of the founders of
>                   modern computer science (suicide by cyanide)
>(2) Vincent Van Gogh  -- renowned painter (suicide by ???)
>(3) Socrates -- renowned philosopher (suicide by hemlock)

Erm, I dunno...does this really count?  It's more like "execution" to my 
taste...the courts of his time ordered him to die, and to prove that he 
did not, in fact, oppose authority the way the Establishment of his time 
believed he did (he was convicted of "corrupting the youth" or something
similar, I think), he did.  Ok, technically, it was suicide; he knew what 
he was drinking and did it with his own hand--but I'd call it execution,
not willful suicide.  He didn't particularly *want* to die, after all.

k
-- 
there's no time for fussing or fighting my friend/but baby I'm amazed at the
hate that you can send and you/painted my entire world        --Bad Religion
the institute for applied wedge physics and petrarcosmology     worcester ma
kay@wpi.wpi.edu    chief observer and research head    project quantum gweep
From: laposkymatth@bvc.edu
Newsgroups: alt.suicide.holiday
Subject: Tis the season...
Date: 17 Dec 92 12:53:13 CST
Organization: Buena Vista College, Storm Lake, IA

   I change out of my button-down shirt.
   They never seem to fit comfortably.

   I slide on an old shirt with blood
   stains on the front from some

   nose bleed I woke with.

   I pull on my rough cotton overshirt and
   it slides easily down over my lean body.

   I find my favorite song and start it with
   a gentle push of a button.

   I heat up my last pizza in the microwave.

   I imagine you there with me as I sway
   gently to the music.

   I notice that my roommate has left
   some cleaning supplies on the floor

   next to his desk.

   I reach down and turn the bottle to
   see what it is.

   I smile.

   The pizza first I think and then
   timer rings and it is done.

   The pizza is very hot and I juggle
   my first bite around with my tongue

   not wanting to spit it out and waste
   it even though it hurts my mouth.

   I notice that the song has reached
   the silent pause that I always

   wait for when I listen to it.

   I stop and focus my eyes in space
   and try to picture you in the short

   time before the guitar begins again.

   As the song rises in tempo for the last
   verse I eat smaller and smaller bites

   saving a last large piece to swallow
   when the song is finished.

   I need something to wash it all down with.


Here's a little cynical poem I wrote about suicide.  While it lacks the 
romantic vagueness of most of the poems in this group I think it embodies 
the new 90's sensibility about leaving just enough guilt behind to satisfy 
your own ego and to allow people who aren't suicidal to brush it off as 
mere antisocial behavior.
From: alto@pegasus.com (Andrea Ostensoe)
Newsgroups: alt.suicide.holiday
Subject: Kavorkian (sp?) in the News
Date: 15 Dec 92 19:16:50 GMT
Organization: Pegasus,  Honolulu

I see that Kavorkian assisted two more people in the past few days..
and I think they were women..in fact..I think all of his "assists"
have been women..interesting..i mean that they have only been women.

He made the annoucement hours before the governor of his state was to
sign a bill making assisted suicide illegal..

Perhaps he should move to Jamaica or the Bahamas and set up a clinic
and then people could go there..it's probably legal in Jamaica..almost
everything else is..;-)


-- 
**************************************************************************
"I don't ask for much..just your heart on a silver platter;-)"
						-Kali
**************************************************************************
Newsgroups: alt.suicide.holiday
From: jurasanen@phcu.helsinki.fi
Subject: Re: I have decided.
Organization: University of Helsinki, Finland
Date: Thu, 17 Dec 1992 12:50:45 GMT

In article <lynn.921214161725@fusion.physics.auburn.edu>, lynn@fusion.physics.auburn.edu (Owen Lynn) writes:
> One can play for one or many objectives in Life - survival 
> being the common objective that everyone has to achieve.  Life

If the objective of life is survival, we're all pretty poor players.

Cease purpose and die.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /     You can always try
/ Hope is the beginning of unhappiness /    
 / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /        jurasanen@phcu.helsinki.fi
                                             
                                           but I doubt that'll get you anywhere
From: wilsonandrew@bvc.edu
Newsgroups: alt.suicide.holiday
Subject: Whatever...
Date: 18 Dec 92 22:32:49 CST
Organization: Buena Vista College, Storm Lake, IA


Yeah, yank the top offa that sucker and guzzle it down
slam that shit down your throat and get rid of that nasty frown

It doesn't really matter how bad your life sucks
when you're drunk... and swimming in upchuck
It doesn't really matter how bad your life sucks
when you're drunk, you just don't give a fuck.

Obliterate those nasty thoughts, who needs them anyway?
Tired of complaining man, it's time to get away.
Realizing that your life is just a game that you're forced to play
grab another cold one and waste another day......

What's that son?
I got my happy thoughts
What's that son?
gots me, cool barley-pop
What for son?
because I'm tired of your talk
What for son?
Fuck you man, just take a walk


Newsgroups: alt.suicide.holiday
From: underdog@leland.Stanford.EDU (Dwight Joe)
Subject: Re: famous suicides
Organization: Miners for a Heart of Gold
Date: Sat, 12 Dec 92 21:06:27 GMT

In article <1gd750INN54l@bigboote.WPI.EDU> kay@bigwpi.WPI.EDU (k) writes:
>In article <1992Dec12.084507.24246@leland.Stanford.EDU>
>underdog@leland.Stanford.EDU (Dwight Joe) writes:
>>Here are some from the top of my head:
>>(1) Alan Turing -- considered by many to be one of the founders of
>>                   modern computer science (suicide by cyanide)
>>(2) Vincent Van Gogh  -- renowned painter (suicide by ???)
>>(3) Socrates -- renowned philosopher (suicide by hemlock)
>Erm, I dunno...does this really count?  It's more like "execution" to my 
>taste...the courts of his time ordered him to die, and to prove that he 
>did not, in fact, oppose authority the way the Establishment of his time 
>believed he did (he was convicted of "corrupting the youth" or something
>similar, I think), he did.  Ok, technically, it was suicide; he knew what 
>he was drinking and did it with his own hand--but I'd call it execution,
>not willful suicide.  He didn't particularly *want* to die, after all.

That's an excellent point.

However, I would consider his case to be, technically, suicide since
he did die by his own hand.  Of course, if he did not die by his own
hand, the state would have executed him.

------------------------------------------------------------------+------------
Jinsei no imi wa nan desu ka.                Sister, can you      |   \|  |`
Shitte itara oshiete kuremasen ka.           spare a coin?        |    | -+-
                                                                  |   /| / \
Copyright 1992.  Disclaimer:  1 + 1 = 3                           |
------------------------------------------------------------------+------------
From: kay@bigwpi.WPI.EDU (k)
Newsgroups: alt.suicide.holiday
Subject: Re: i have decided.
Date: 18 Dec 1992 08:08:18 GMT
Organization: Project Quantum Gweep
Distribution: alt
NNTP-Posting-Host: bigwpi.wpi.edu

In article <1992Dec17.3963.2235@dosgate> "andrew comello" <andrew.comello@canrem.com> writes:
>K>Life is irrelevant.  Survival is irrelevant.  Play is irrelevant.
>K>Death is irrelevant.  Hope is irrelevant.  Unhappiness is irrelevant.
>K>Purpose is existence.  Existence is assimilation.  You will be assimilated.
>K>Your life as you know it is over.  From this day forward you will service us.
>
>ever watch Star Trek? you sound just like the Borg and you're right...
>life is a useless function...

Star Trek is irrelevant.  The Borg are irrelevant.  Uselessness is futile.
You will be assimilated.

:-)

Yep...don't'cha love the Borg?  They've got an answer for everything.  :-)

ObSuicide: Depressed, yes.  That depressed, no.

Hee.

k
-- 
I'll have to break your kneecaps   |       from "A Patrick Swayze Christmas"
If you bastards touch my car       |       by Crow T. Robot         MST-3000
the institute for applied wedge physics and petrarcosmology     worcester ma
kay@wpi.wpi.edu    chief observer and research head    project quantum gweep
Newsgroups: alt.suicide.holiday
From: awatson@pecan.cns.udel.edu (angela watson)
Subject: Re: God, I wish I could sleep
Summary: smiling to death... 
Organization: The Eternal Order of Chaos 
Date: Sun, 13 Dec 1992 00:56:11 GMT

	All this talk of smiling has me chuckling to myself...

	For the past several days, I've had trouble getting myself to
_stop_ smiling.  Part of it is that I can better mask my accent if I'm
grinning a bit... but alot of it is just putting up a facade.

	People tend to leave you alone (as far as asking you how your
personal life is going) if you give the apperance of being happy or content.
(At least they leave me alone... which is what I want.) It's much easier to
control others minds when they don't really know who you are (since you feed
them a facade constantly).

	As far as feeling better... it's helped me stave off nervous breakdowns
until I had time alone to recover partially... but I know myself too well
to let a body gesture/social action alter my personal state non-superficially.

	Of course, I also grin right before I'm about to pounce...

	(Makes the fangs seem more dramatic, right Kali?)

	Psycho Kitten

	(still debating about the iguana)

-- 

Angela M. Watson / awatson@pecan.cns.udel.edu /       [.sig under] 
Psycho Kitten   / zaphodb@brahms.udel.edu    /       [construction]
Organization: Mythos/Xcalbrin Inc.
X-School: Penn State University
Date: Tue, 15 Dec 1992 12:51:05 EST
From: Natalie P. <NDP102@psuvm.psu.edu>
Newsgroups: alt.suicide.holiday
Subject: Re: Kali

In article <1992Dec14.194102.3021@u.washington.edu>,
batboy@carson.u.washington.edu (Thomas Radke) says:
>
>>Lorelei
>
>Isn't there a Cocteau Twins song called 'Lorelei'?
>

There's also a Pogues song called "Lorelei".  It's pretty damn good too.

But this isn't alt.songs.with.the.same.name.discussion--sorry!
--Natalie
Newsgroups: alt.suicide.holiday
From: alto@pegasus.com (Andrea Ostensoe)
Subject: Re: God, I wish I could sleep
Organization: Pegasus,  Honolulu
Date: Mon, 14 Dec 92 18:19:49 GMT

In article <1992Dec9.103908.19758@aber.ac.uk> azw@aber.ac.uk (Andrew Michael Woodward) writes:
>In article <Byuty6.1yo@NCoast.ORG> brown@NCoast.ORG (Stan Brown) writes:
>>In article <zlsiida.526@fs1.mcc.ac.uk> zlsiida@fs1.mcc.ac.uk (dave budd) writes:
>>>I recently heard that deliberately smiling for two minutes every day as an 
>>>exercise, ie don't wait for something nice/funny, just smile for two minutes 
>>>between, say, the bathroom and the kitchen after you get up or something, is 
>>>a sort of self-fulfilling attempt at increasing your happiness quotient.
>>
>>It also makes your enemies wonder what you're thinking.
>>
>>Oops...sorry...that's alt.paranoia isn't it?
>>-- 
>>Stan Brown, Oak Road Systems                      brown@Ncoast.ORG
>>Cleveland, Ohio, USA
>>"Of course I'm an egomaniac.  I've got America's sweetheart climbing up
>>my drainpipe!"                              -- {Soapdish}
>
>
>
>For God's sake -no humour!! I only read this group so that when I see how
>depressed the rest of you lot are, I can feel smug instead.
>
>STOP IT.

Well..we can have *sick* humor..;->


-- 
**************************************************************************
"I don't ask for much..just your heart on a silver platter;-)"
						-Kali
**************************************************************************
Newsgroups: alt.suicide.holiday
From: alto@pegasus.com (Andrea Ostensoe)
Subject: Re: Austin Suicide Video?
Organization: Pegasus,  Honolulu
Date: Mon, 14 Dec 92 18:51:58 GMT

In article <4195@dozo.and.nl> jos@and.nl (Jos Horsmeier) writes:
>In article <1992Dec9.183618.7117@pegasus.com> alto@pegasus.com (Andrea Ostensoe) writes:
>|Right.
>|
>|Let's see what would be on an ASHer's Christmas List?
>|
>|1.  Hemlock
>|2.  Cyanide
>|3.  Arsenic
>|4.  Guns
>|5.  Explosives
>|6.  Plenty of paper and pen for writing just the "right" note
>7. Super glue
>
>Jos aka The Dutch Mountain Man

Oh..I forgot it..but then I usually have that on my torture list..
for..The Dutch Mountain Man that is..hey..there aren't any mountains
in Holland..no tricks..netherperson!;-)

-- 
**************************************************************************
"I don't ask for much..just your heart on a silver platter;-)"
						-Kali
**************************************************************************
From: jfriesne@sdcc13.ucsd.edu (Jeremy Friesner!)
Newsgroups: alt.suicide.holiday
Subject: Re: Chicken & Egg bullshit... my favorite dilemna...
Date: 12 Dec 92 08:20:00 GMT
Organization: University of California, San Diego

In article <1992Dec11.172543.27200@linus.mitre.org> lewis@aera8700.mitre.org (Keith Lewis) writes:
>In article <42383@sdcc12.ucsd.edu>, jfriesne@sdcc13.ucsd.edu (Jeremy Friesner!) writes:
>>Y-aack!  I see people around me in very intimate relationships,
>>I hear about them from friends and on the net, and I want something
>>like that so bad it hurts.... and of course I'm afraid that 
>>wanting it so badly is going to interfere with my actually getting
>>it... I'll probably come across as desparate or weird to anyone
>
>I think you're right about this.  I've been in the same boat before.  It's a
>catch-22 situation, and the only way to escape it is by chance.  You have to
>find somebody when you're not looking (at least, not very hard).  Or find
>somebody just as desparate as yourself.


Yes, I think that's right.  If anyone's read Douglas Adams on
how to fly, this method will probably sound familiar ;^)

As for finding someone as desparate as myself... ok, where do
the desparate people hang out?  :^)

>Think of intimacy as an addictive drug -- it feels sweet, but the
>(inevitable?) withdrawl is hell.  Pursue other things.


As an addict, I don't WANT other things (whine, whine!)  :)


>#define SHALLOW         /* enter shallow mode */
>
>There are many things you can pursue that will make women want you, but will
>benefit you even if they don't.  Material, friends, and (your own!) art are
>three such things.  Pursue these even if you don't think you want them.  The
>women will come to you.
>


Well, I've started running again, and the women have yet
to knock down my door...



-- 
|~~~~///~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~|
|3k!///  "If you never have the time, never get to see cloud 9,   |
\\\///  there's a place where you can wait, on cloud 8."  -FC     |
|\XX/_____________________________________________________________|
Newsgroups: alt.suicide.holiday
From: underdog@leland.Stanford.EDU (Dwight Joe)
Subject: Re: famous suicides
Organization: Miners for a Heart of Gold
Date: Sat, 12 Dec 92 08:45:07 GMT

In article <1gbsq0INNpui@controversy.math.lsa.umich.edu>
elnitsky@math.lsa.umich.edu (Serge Elnitsky) writes:
>  I'm sure this has been asked before, but... Has anyone compiled
>a list of famous people who committed suicide? If so, can someone
>please forward me a copy. If not, let's compile one...
>                                                         S.E.

Here are some from the top of my head:

(1) Alan Turing -- considered by many to be one of the founders of
                   modern computer science (suicide by cyanide)
(2) Vincent Van Gogh  -- renowned painter (suicide by ???)
(3) Socrates -- renowned philosopher (suicide by hemlock)

------------------------------------------------------------------+------------
Jinsei no imi wa nan desu ka.                Sister, can you      |   \|  |`
Shitte itara oshiete kuremasen ka.           spare a coin?        |    | -+-
                                                                  |   /| / \
Copyright 1992.  Disclaimer:  1 + 1 = 3                           |
------------------------------------------------------------------+------------
Newsgroups: alt.suicide.holiday