HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: bena@yoyo.cc.monash.edu.au (Ben Aveling)
Subject: Re: How to tell if you are in love
Organization: Monash University General Access Unix
X-Newsreader: TIN [version 1.1 PL6]
Date: Sat, 10 Oct 1992 06:38:59 GMT

Naveena Michael (naveena@enuxhb.eas.asu.edu) wrote:
: 
: Hi again folks
: 	This question of how to tell if you are in love has always baffled me.
: But more so as to how to distinguish between infatuation and love.... When you
: are infatuated with a person you FEEL that you are in love with that person,
: right?
: 	And somebody suggested that we wait and find out...well for how long
: does one wait??.  What is a SURE sign that you are in love with the person
: and not just infatuated with them.
: 
: Naveena

What about, "They make you happy" vs "You want to make them happy"
Except that you might want to make them happy in the hope they'll
make you happy.  It's not easy is it ?

Sigh :-)

	Ben
From: tedwards@src.umd.edu (Thomas Grant Edwards)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: What to bring on a first date?
Date: 16 Oct 92 05:01:19 GMT
Organization: Systems Research Center, Maryversity of Uniland, College Park

In article <oerKZFO00WB70ZQYcy@andrew.cmu.edu> "Andrea B. Gansley-Ortiz" <ag1v+@andrew.cmu.edu> writes:
>Excerpts from netnews.alt.romance: 14-Oct-92 Re: What to bring on a
>firs.. by Thomas Grant Edwards@eng 
>> Better prepared than pregnant/dead, eh?
>I thought this was alt.romance. I don't consider it very 'romantic' to
>jump into bed on the first date. If sex is all that important that you
>can't wait until the second date (or six months or a year, etc.) then
>where's the romance in the relationship.

I didn't say you should have sex on your first date...
I said you should always be prepared...
Nothing is less romantic than death and pregnancy...

But alas, I stray into the "real world."  Enough of this gloomy 
talk on alt.romance!

Bring a brass rose!

-Thomas
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Army Boots?
From: rpaiz@husc8.harvard.edu (Rodolfo Paiz)
Date: 8 Oct 92 05:41:31 GMT

isar@ac.dal.ca writes:

> [lots of good, valid, perfectly logical statements]

>..sigh... Peace..

I'll drink to that.  Cheers...

> Isa R.

Rodolfo P.
From: dswt@bnr.co.uk (Stewart Tansley)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: What to bring on a first date?
Date: 15 Oct 92 17:51:44 GMT
Reply-To: dswt@bnr.co.uk (Stewart Tansley)
Organization: BNR Europe Limited, London Road, Harlow, Essex, GB

In the referenced article "Andrea B. Gansley-Ortiz" <ag1v+@andrew.cmu.edu> writes:
>Excerpts from netnews.alt.romance: 14-Oct-92 Re: What to bring on a
>firs.. by Thomas Grant Edwards@eng 
>> >       Kind of forward on a first date?  Or is it hopeful nowadays? :-)
>>  
>> Better prepared than pregnant/dead, eh?
>
>I thought this was alt.romance. I don't consider it very 'romantic' to
>jump into bed on the first date. If sex is all that important that you
>can't wait until the second date (or six months or a year, etc.) then
>where's the romance in the relationship.
>
>ag

Hear, hear! Jeez, I thought getting laid on a first date went out in the
70s, guys & gals! Who are these people? Weird...

I may not be the most romantic contributer to this newsgroup, but anything
romantic about sex on a first date only happens in the movies. Tacky
business, animal lust. Nice feelings, but tacky WRT romance, IMHO.

===========================================================================
Stewart Tansley     | BNR Europe Limited              |  'Be cool, or be
                    | London Rd, Harlow, CM17 9NA, UK |    cast out...'
dswt@bnr.co.uk      | +44 279 429531 x2763 (ESN 742)  | Subdivisions, Rush
===========================================================================
  'You know how that rabbit feels -- going under your speeding wheels...'
===========================================================================
Organization: Engineering Design Research Center, Carnegie Mellon, Pittsburgh, PA
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Date: Thu, 15 Oct 1992 09:41:58 -0400 
From: "Andrea B. Gansley-Ortiz" <ag1v+@andrew.cmu.edu>
Subject: Re: Won't have Sex with a Fat Guy

= that's fine. But just because your spouse has gained wait is no
= reason to 'dump' them. This isn't dating. This is a lifelong 

Please read as 'gained weight'. I had a mental hiccup. 8-)

ag
From: dswt@bnr.co.uk (Stewart Tansley)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Nice Guys?
Date: 9 Oct 92 18:09:14 GMT
Reply-To: dswt@bnr.co.uk (Stewart Tansley)
Organization: BNR Europe Limited, London Road, Harlow, Essex, GB

In the referenced article weaver@jetsun.weitek.COM (Michael Gordon Weaver) writes:
>In article <1992Oct6.121342.4775@bnr.co.uk> dswt@bnr.co.uk (Stewart Tansley) writes:
>>In the referenced article pa_ross@csd.brispoly.ac.uk (Mr Rossy) writes:
>>>
>>>Finding a girlfriend is easy, finding one that you like is the real trick.
>>>
>>Quite. Which is why I've come to the conclusion that it's just not worth
>>worrying about finding someone any more -- the chances of finding someone
>>you like as much as you like the look of just seem so slim, why bother? :-\
>>
>Live and learn. I think you will find that good looks are quickly
>forgotten, and that someone you like looks better and better, to you,
>the more you like them. If you find someone attractive, enjoy it. 
>But remember, looks are just looks. You enjoy a rose by looking at it.
>You enjoy a peach by eating it. Eat a rose and you will end up hungry.

Hmm. I'm unconvinced I'll never be greatly influenced by looks. I've 
obviously got some way to go yet, but I'm getting on already! :-) (29)

>Also, I have never found it easy to find a girlfriend, as I am so
>selective.  This always used to seem to be so obvious. Why go looking
>in a shoe store when you know what you want is a hammer? But, if
>I had not been so selective, I might have found that someone who didn't
>seem promising when I was getting to know her casually turned out to be
>quite special when we tried be a couple.

Turns out I think we probably have the same problem, Michael!

[More good advice]
>Michael.

As ever, Michael posts good advice. Interestingly though, we feel pretty much
the same, although I must say do prefer a pretty woman... (sorry girls!) :-)

===========================================================================
Stewart Tansley     | BNR Europe Limited              |  'Be cool, or be
                    | London Rd, Harlow, CM17 9NA, UK |    cast out...'
dswt@bnr.co.uk      | +44 279 429531 x2763 (ESN 742)  | Subdivisions, Rush
===========================================================================
  'You know how that rabbit feels -- going under your speeding wheels...'
===========================================================================
From: diana@wetware.com (CatWoman )
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Birthday gift for a girlfriend
Date: 15 Oct 92 20:09:02 GMT
Organization: Castle WetWare MouseCatcher

wheeler@edp.UUCP (Bob Wheeler ird) writes:

] Help.
] 
] I want to give my girlfriend a "Kladaugh" (spelling?) ring for her birthday.
                                  Claddagh or Kladdagh

] A Kladaugh ring is the Irish equivalent of a promise ring.  It has hands
] wrapping around and touching a heart with a crown on the heart.
] 
] Does anyone know where I can find one?

I'll e-mail also - but for anyone else as well, try
local street fairs, City/County Fairs, Festivals, or
any other place where jewlers would gather to sell
their wares.  Rennaissance Faire's are good places -
if you can wait for a while, try the Dicken's faire
here in San Francisco.

Otherwise, look for non-standard jewlery shops, places
who make pewter and crystal ornaments, and the like.
Santa Cruz, Sausalito, Pier 39, and other places like
that could be helpful.

Diana
From: bushmanangel@bvc.edu
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Army Boots?
Date: 9 Oct 92 17:38:19 CDT
Organization: Buena Vista College, Storm Lake, IA

In article <YepMjhK00iUz81mUUa@andrew.cmu.edu>, "Andrea B. Gansley-Ortiz" <ag1v+@andrew.cmu.edu> writes:
> 	<1992Oct8.171744.2271@bvc.edu>
> Lines: 24
> 
> Angela writes:
> 
>>> This does not sound like Feminism to me it sounds more like equality, a
>>> concept I agree with whole heartedly (sp?)
>>> 
>>> 					 Paul
>>> 					=----=
>> 
>>Funny, that's exactly what feminism is all about!  You're beginning to 
>>understand.
> 
> I would argue that point. I specifically don't call myself a feminist
> because of the large feminist organizations which have strayed from the
> original works of the movement into a man-hating, woman-supremist rhetoric.
> 
> NOW comes to mind. Or at least the voices of NOW that get national attention.
> 
> Besides the fact that it's more important what I do as a woman than what I
> label myself. 
> 
> ag
> 

Of course this is all a matter of definition, but I would call certain 
organizations "radical" feminists.  There are other classificataions, too, 
such as "liberal feminists."  I know feminism has a negative connotation 
from the radical feminists who began the movement in the 60's and 70's, but 
I don't see that it has to be a negative thing.  Perhaps one of us should 
look it up in the dictionary--or maybe just drop it, because I'm not sure 
this belongs in alt.romance.
From: om_kase@pavo.concordia.ca (KASEIR, OSSAMA M.)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: How do you know if you are in love?
Date: 10 Oct 92 06:34:00 GMT
Distribution: na
Organization: Concordia University
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41

In article <BvM7K0.wI@mentor.cc.purdue.edu>, darkmoor@mentor.cc.purdue.edu (Darkmoore) writes...
> 
>  How do you know if you are in love?
> 
>  you will just know. No one can tell you for sure, but you will find out by
> your self. Its one of those things 
>   
>    
>    sam
From: s344021@emu.insted.unimelb.edu.au
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Query
Date: 8 Oct 92 14:24:55 GMT

Well...I'm pretty new to this news group but have been reading it in silence
for a few months and thought I would post and tell you how reading all your
messages makes my day most of the time...

Especially when I'm depressed!! :)

By the way...you have probable been asked this quite a lot but can someone
please mail me and explain the Initial abreviations you all use for some of
the words...

Much appreciated 
Gizz
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: stuarta@syd.dms.CSIRO.AU (Stuart Andrews)
Subject: Re: Gifts for Men (Re: Anniversery Gift Suggestions?)
Organization: CSIRO Division of Mathematics and Statistics, Australia
Date: Tue, 13 Oct 1992 00:05:19 GMT

Marcia Bednarcyk (Sweaty Snugglebunnies) writes...

> But don't rule these out, either......sometimes that's EXACTLY what they
want :-).
A
Thanks MArcia (or should I call you Sweaty?!) I forgot that. I can't ever
remember a girlie <-(Positive, affectionate term) giving me flowers, but
I really would like some (hint hint!!!!). That would be really nice. I own
the odd teddy bear, so I guess for some guys those are cool to.

G

-- 
Geoffrey Breach                       | "Never ask your murder-suspect client  
(masquerading as stuarta)             |  if they did it. They might answer
AWA Communications. Lane Cove, Sydney |  your question. And then where will
Australia. Voice 61,2 413 6333        |  you be?"  Horace Rumpole, of the Bailey
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
AWA Communications don't know I'm doing this and CSIRO think I'm somebody else
so I'm afraid that the only person responsible for this posting can be me!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: highway@wam.umd.edu (Sub-Zero/Raiden)
Subject: WoMen.
Organization: Olympus Police ESWAT || Central Management Bureau (AEGIS)
Date: Wed, 7 Oct 1992 06:30:12 GMT

In article <1992Oct7.152635.1@emu.insted.unimelb.edu.au> s342063@emu.insted.unimelb.edu.au writes:
>MEN.
>
>They say they really love you,
>but they never really do.
>They say you are the one and only,
>but it's never really true,
>They say you'll be together,
>for ever and a day,
>But somehow things don't seem
>to quite work out that way.
>
>Kezzle.

Sorry to burst your bubble, but this is a two-way street.  The above can
be said true about women too.  Yes, I was on the receiving end of a dump
in a relationship..
-- 
highway: the snuggly & cuddly care bear     Phone: (301) 990-1075
Post Office Box 7944                     Bitnet: tcwu@umdd.bitnet
Gaithersburg, MD 20898-7944         Internet: highway@wam.umd.edu
Univ of Maryland in College Park, MD | Alpha Phi Omega Fraternity
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: dks@sr.com (Dave K. Sprow)
Subject: Re: How to tell if you are in love
Keywords: Infatuation
Reply-To: dks@srhqla.UUCP (Dave K. Sprow)
Organization: Silent Radio, Los Angeles
Date: Wed, 7 Oct 1992 20:57:28 GMT

In article <1992Oct7.164319.3193@constellation.ecn.uoknor.edu> bwbrock@midway.ecn.uoknor.edu (Benjamin Warre Brock) writes:
>
>1. What do I want from this relationship?
>
Sex


>2. Have I told him/her what is important to me in a relationship?
>

You BET!!

>3. Does he/she tell me what is important to him/her in a relationship?
>
Yessiree !!

>4. Am I happy with the way things are?
>
No.  They can *always* get better!!

>5. What type of changes would make it better?
>
Well, they these cool, very kinky stores you see... and well, ah, better
not think about that now...

>6. Can we talk about touching?
>
Rather be doing it, thank you very much.

>7. Do I fee good about the touching we do?
>
Is this a trick question?!?

>8. Am I feeling pressured or am I pressurring?
>
Hopefully!!  Just the right amount of pressure in *just* the right places...
>
9. How does the relationship effect other things or people in my life?
>
What other things?!?

>10 Who can I talk to when things get tough?
>
What's with all this talking stuff. She *likes* it rough!

>


Gee, I love being shallow...

David S.

















ife
>
>*the two people are close friends
>
>*each person continues to grow as an independent human being
>
>*there is joy in giving as well as recieving
>
>*there is honesty and trust btween the two people
>
>*each feels a responsibility to the others well being
>
>
>INFATUATION IS NOT LOVE
>
>*the person depends on the relation for self esteem
>
>*the person takes more from the relationship than they give
>
>*each is jealous of the others seperate activities
>
>*the relationship drains the person of energy
>
>*the person is afraid that the other person will lose interest in them
>
>*the person can only think of the other person
> 
>What do you think
>
>
>
>
>-- 
>Ben Brock
>bwbrock@midway.ecn.uoknor.edu
>aero engr (junior)


Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: arcane@cybernet.cse.fau.edu (Kendrick Davis)
Subject: Yes DarkMoore
Organization: Cybernet BBS, Boca Raton, Florida
Date: Fri, 9 Oct 1992 06:20:09 GMT



  I Love you too!

 (now I know what you ment by "You'll know which posts involve you")

  Be my boy, and I'll be your Knight!

 oh yes, and greetings to all you peoples in Alt.Romance, we'll get to 
know a lot of each other I suspect

 Hugs,

                          -< ARCANE >-
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: "Raistlin Majere" <p00139@psilink.com>
Subject: Re: Help! What should I do? (Very long)
Organization: Tower of High Sorcery - Palanthas
Date: Sat, 10 Oct 1992 04:00:39 GMT
X-Mailer: PSILink (3.2)

>DATE:   7 Oct 92 16:18:06 CDT
>FROM:   bushmanangel@bvc.edu
>
>> 		"Women are often thought to be profound.
>> 	 	 Why? Because they are percieved to have great
>> 		 depth - Women aren't even shallow!....."
>> 				 	- Freiderich Nietzsche
>> *****************************************************************************
>> 	      Raistlin Majere @ Tower of High Sorcery - Palanthas

>I could say EXACTLY the same thing about most men, but rather than 
>perpetuate stereotyes, I'd rather just say that those of us who do not 
>consider ourselves "lost puppies" would never date an a**hole like you.

	Nietzsche was more correct than he'll ever know, as demonstrated
	by your response...thank you for proving my point for me, my dear.

	Touch a nerve, did we?.......

	<Insert "Malevolent, Mocking, Satanic, Laughter"[tm] Here>
>
>Angela
*****************************************************************************
		"This time, you've gone too far!
		 This time, you've gone too far!
		 I told ya, I told ya, I told ya, I told ya!
		 Don't talk back - Just drive the car!
		 Shut your mouth - I know what you are!"
				- Peter Gabriel, "Digging in the Dirt"
*****************************************************************************
	     Raistlin Majere @ Tower of High Sorcery - Palanthas
*****************************************************************************
From: feirtag@i5120b.nrl.navy.mil (Fred Feirtag)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Please Help
Date: 8 Oct 92 21:27:42 GMT

In article <BCR.92Oct8173310@hpl3sn02.cern.ch>, bcr@cernapo.cern.ch (Bill Riemers) writes:
|> 
|> >2.) Are you pro choice?
|> >Yes                  [x]
|> >Sometimes            [ ]  How can you sometimes be pro-choice???
|> >No                   [ ]
|> >Haven't heard enough [ ]
|> >Other                [ ]
|> 

Some people believe that a fetus is entitled to all rights of a citizen,
unless the father was related to the mother or he wasn't a nice guy and
fun was not had by all at the time of impregnation.  I consider this view
absolutely crazy.

It seems to me that these "sometimes" people simply consider bearing an
unwanted child a punishment for women who don't measure up to their
standards of sexual behavior.

I predict that this will be the anti-abortionists un-doing.  Hope so.

-- 

                              | "Santa Fe destroyed many of it's historic
Fred Feirtag                  |  buildings by covering them up; Albuquerque
Naval Research Lab, Code 5120 |  just tore them down.  As a result, Albuquerque
Washington, DC  20375         |  is a city with amnesia, a place with a 
feirtag@wave.nrl.navy.mil     |  fascinating past and almost no collective
(202) 404 - 8502              |  memory.  It committed a cultural lobotomy
                              |  on itself."          --V.B. Price
From: reha@cunixf.cc.columbia.edu (Reha Elci)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: What's Romantic?
Date: 14 Oct 92 23:43:39 GMT
Reply-To: reha@cunixf.cc.columbia.edu (Reha Elci)
Organization: Columbia University

In article <1992Oct14.230642.20315@wetware.com> diana@wetware.com (CatWoman ) writes:
>petitc@rpi.edu writes:
>
>]   Just a simple little thread.  What do you think is more romantic: 
>] 
>] (A) Really big romantic getaways,
>] (B) More romantic 'little things'? (e.g. a little card for no reson)
>
>My vote is for B.
>
>To me - a "really big romantic getaway" involves planning,
>time, forethought, etc., and therefore can get a lot of
>preconceptions over what SHOULD happen during the time - and
>as we all know, not everything turns out the way it's planned
>to turn out.  It does help if both people are in on the 
>planning, and it's something that both have looked forward
>to, and there are no outside worries that will haunt them
>at the time - but IMMHO there are too many variables to 
>make this successful very often.
>
>Diana

I really disagree with that Diana (sorry!). There is no substitute for
spontaneous romance no matter which group they belong. The only problem
with really big stuff is that you must have the financial means to
accomplish them. For example, I'd show up at my SO's office on friday 
(telling her before I'd pick her up for dinner) and take her straight 
to the airport catching the next flight over to the Caribbean for a 
romantic weekend. In fact, whether you do small or big things, it should
be mostly spontaneous; I've found to be a lot more fun then planning.
Also, when planned things fall thru it is much more of a disappointment :-(

Reha Elci
Email: elci@bugs.gs.com
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: ksdavis@silver.ucs.indiana.edu (Karleenus Schwartz Davis)
Subject: Re: What to bring on a first date?
Organization: Indiana University
Date: Tue, 13 Oct 1992 00:01:22 GMT

terrylee@wpi.WPI.EDU (The Cookie Goddess) writes:
>MBUTCHER@MIAMIU.BITNET writes:
>> [. . .]  What is the best thing to bring on a first date?  [. . .]
>
>Yourself.

And your clothes, most of the time.

-sz
From: muzzle@cs.uq.oz.au (Murray Chapman)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: why the guy?
Keywords: call for opinions
Date: 15 Oct 92 05:00:01 GMT
Reply-To: muzzle@cs.uq.oz.au

In <Bw20KG.KpM@news.iastate.edu> baarniy@iastate.edu (Scott A Coon) writes:

>Another thread ("How to tell a girl your feelings" I think)
>was summarized neatly by "Old, old story of longstanding friends,
>one of whom (as usual, the guy) falls in love with the other one."
>(I'm sorry I can't give a specific credit, since I've lost it, but
>whomever noted this should feel free to wave their hand and say
>"Me, me!  It was me!")

Women have no trouble finding *someone* to go out with, but they have trouble
finding the "right one".

Men have no trouble finding the "right one", but they have trouble getting her
to go out with them.

Just a thought.

>Scott C.

Murray Chapman
muzzle@cs.uq.oz.au
--
~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^
  Murray Chapman                           muzzle@cs.uq.oz.au
  University of Queensland                 How many lightbulb jokes does it
  Brisbane, Australia                      take to change the subject?
From: frank@rniwi.rni.sub.org (Frank Mogaddedi)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: How to tell if you are in love
Keywords: Infatuation
Date: 7 Oct 92 07:06:49 GMT
Organization: Frank's Wild Unix

naveena@enuxhb.eas.asu.edu (Naveena Michael) writes:


>Hi again folks
>	This question of how to tell if you are in love has always baffled me.
>But more so as to how to distinguish between infatuation and love.... When you
>are infatuated with a person you FEEL that you are in love with that person,
>right?
>	And somebody suggested that we wait and find out...well for how long
>does one wait??.  What is a SURE sign that you are in love with the person
>and not just infatuated with them.

>Naveena

Is it really necessary to know? Live for today, perhaps tomorrow, but
need you make plans for the next ump-teen years?
Two scenarios that happened to friends of mine:

	1.	A couple meets, moves together and lives together
		for thirteen (yes, 13!) years. They marry. They
		get divorced within 3 MONTHS!

	2.	Another couple meets. After knowing each other for
		about 4-5 months they both decide (actually, both
		came up with the idea on their own) to marry.
		They will marry in 2 days, so I don't know for
		how long it will last. Hopefully forever.

So, I thought to myself, what do I learn from this?
And I decided to just live one day at a time. Too many of my long-term
plans have been twisted or shattered in the past. And incidents as
mentioned above only make me want to continue to live for today.

Are both of you happy? Have fun together? Like to be around each
other not only in good, but also in bad moods? Do you help each
other in those situations?
If yes, is it really important to analyse you feelings and take them
apart to pieces?
I'd say, enjoy yourselves! Try to make it last, but always savour the
moment.

Take care
	Frank
-- 
+-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+
| e-mail: frank@rniwi.rni.sub.org | Disclaimer: "Read my lips" (George Bush)  |
|   "Happiness is a mere interlude of a general drama of pain" Thomas Hardy   |
|	     What luck for women, that men can see better than think	      |
Newsgroups: alt.romance