HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: mcohen@vax.clarku.edu
Subject: Dave on CSpan!
Organization: Clark University
Date: 12 NOV 92 19:28:28 GMT

What a nice surprise - Dave's talk at the national press club was carried live 
on CSpan2 today.  As reported by someone here earlier, it will be replayed 
this Saturday on CSpan at 6pm Eastern (3pm Pacific).

Dave was very funny.  I won't say anything else so not to spoil the fun!

/--------------------------------------------------------------------------\
|  \  /                                                              \  /  |
|  /  \               From the Desk and Mind of Mitch                /  \  |
|   /\                                                                /\   |
|  \  /                   MCohen@Vax.Clarku.Edu                      \  /  |
|   \/                                                                \/   |
|            Any opinions expressed are clearly someone else's!            |
\__________________________________________________________________________/
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
From: bslavens@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu (Bradley E Slavens)
Subject: Mr. Dave Barry, B.S.-Electoral College
Organization: The Ohio State University
Date: Fri, 6 Nov 1992 08:04:24 GMT

Does anyone know how many electoral votes DB got?

By my projections, he should have carried Mississippi, DC, Guam, Japan (largely
due to his recent campaign efforts there), Rocky Mountain National Park, 
Hawley, Smoot, 90210, circa 1886, 'K' St., Lake Erie, Vogon, and, of course, 
his home state Coral Gables ( or was that Coconut Grove ).

He also was narrowly trailing Voltaire and Andre Marrou in France (due to some
recent war threat).  IANMTU!!

I think this adds up to 9 1/2 electoral votes, just shy of the 270 needed to
win.

Please advise if I have made any errors.

Just checking,

Brad "Oh yeah, and Minneapolis too" Slavens
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
From: gak@wrs.com (Richard Stueven)
Subject: Re: DB at NPC 11-12-92
Reply-To: gak@wrs.com
Organization: Wind River Systems, Inc.
Distribution: ba
Date: Fri, 13 Nov 1992 16:46:09 GMT

KQED-FM ran this piece at 8:00pm last night, while I was at the Sharks game.

I'll trade a six-pack of homebrew for a tape of the show...

thx
gak

---
Richard Stueven       AHA# 22584 |----------| He has erected a multitude of new
Internet:            gak@wrs.com |----GO----| offices, and sent hither swarms
ATTMAIL: ...!attmail!gakhaus!gak |---SHARX--| of officers to harass our people,
Cow Palace:            107/H/3-4 |----------| and eat out their substance.
From: mimi@ssd.intel.com (Mary-Suzanne King)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
Subject: Dave Barry IS President!!
Date: 5 Nov 92 23:00:10 GMT
Organization: Supercomputer Systems Division, Intel


Ok, I have the answer. What do you all say to this:

  Dave Barry IS President.
  
  If Clinton wants us to do something,
   he has to go through Dave...
   if Dave approves, he'll ask us himself.

And let's blame it all on the Electoral College!

I think this is a good plan.  Anyone else?

   Suzanne.


Yes, for you Paula Poundstone fans, I did get the idea from her.

---------------------------------------------------------------------
"We're going to run this race on issues, not personalities."
"Oh? Why is that?"
"Because our candidate doesn't _have_ a personality."
                                                     ---Blackadder 3
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
From: dant@techbook.com (Dan Tilque)
Subject: DB in Portland
Organization: Pseudopolis Yard
Date: Thu, 12 Nov 1992 07:38:55 GMT

A local columnist says that DB is going to be on a locally produced TV
show called Town Hall.  All he says about it is that several news
columnists will appear with Dave.  He gives no dates or if they're going
to talk about exploding animals or bad rock 'n' roll songs (actually, he
says that the title of the program will be "The Power of the Pen").

For those in the Portland area, the local columnists are Margie Boule,
Jonathan Nichols, Steve Dunn and Michael Burgess.  Burgess's column is
where I saw this.

Then again, he could be making it up...

---
Dan Tilque    --     dant@techbook.com
From: petersen4331@iscsvax.uni.edu
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
Subject: President? Hell,REGISTERhe should be KING!
Date: 9 Nov 92 05:45:58 GMT
Organization: University of Northern Iowa

I don't know about all of you, but I personally voted for Dave.  Why not?  He
never slept with my mom.  Or Gennifer Flowers for that matter.  I'll bet Perot
got his _I have no experience running up a trillion dollar debt_ from Dave.  I
did.

Anyways, the reason I'm sendin' is cuz I don't want anyone to be ashamed if
they did write-in for Dave Barry.  I tell everyone who asks me, proudly.  Being
the pathetic creatures they are, these brainless people consequently say _Dave
who?_ and naturally I stab them with a dull spoon.

Incidentally, I am currently investigating the number of votes Dave got but am
coming up about two margaritas short.  But if I find out I'll be sure to let
y'all know.

                                        Eternally stupid,
                                        Kevin

"Only those who dare go too far will ever truly know how far they can go."
                                                        -Anonymus
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
From: m14430@mwunix.mitre.org (Lawrence Larson)
Subject: Worst Rock Songs of All Time...
Organization: The MITRE Corporation
Date: Mon, 9 Nov 1992 17:35:48 GMT

Don't know if this Sunday's article was the same everywhere, but in the
Washington Post, DB asked for fans' nominations for: 1) the Worst Overall [Rock]
Song and 2) the Worst [Rock Song] Lyrics to be sent *ON A POSTAL CARD, NOT A
LETTER* to:

Bad Song Survey, c/o Dave Barry
The Washington Post Magazine
1150 15th St. NW
Washington, DC 20071

So, if you missed election day, here's your chance to cast a really
meaningful vote!

-- Larry

Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
From: mjenkins@alfred.carleton.ca (Michael Jenkinson)
Subject: Re: No Acronyms, Please!
Organization: Carleton University
Date: Fri, 6 Nov 1992 18:29:21 GMT

In <BxB0wC.HJy@wrs.com> gak@wrs.com (Richard Stueven) writes:


>Seriously, would Dave approve of this bastardization of his Service
>Mark?  (He _has_ registered it, hasn't he?)

If he has, then Stephanie Brush (who by the way, is NOT funny) owes
him big time money. She uses that phrase (I am not making this up) at
least once in every issue of Comic Relief, which reprints her columns
as well as Dave's.

Michael
From: wallsj@CS.ColoState.EDU (jeffrey joel walls)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
Subject: Re: Barry on Tape
Date: 5 Nov 92 05:31:46 GMT
Organization: Colorado State University, Computer Science Department

In article <1992Nov2.202457.1@woods.ulowell.edu> friedmand@woods.ulowell.edu writes:
>Has anyone heard the version of DB's Only Travel Guide on cassette?

  I have!

>I'd be interested to know how it is...

  It's hilarious!  Definitely worth getting!

  I also have Dave Barry Talks Back on tape (for those long trips home
  to Mississippi) and it is not as good because Dave doesn't read that
  one (although it's pretty hilarious too)

Jeff 

+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+
|       Colorado State University       | 
+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+
| Jeff Walls - wallsj@CS.ColoState.Edu  |
| 2520 Baxter Place                     |
| Fort Collins, CO  80526               |
| (303) 226-2411                        |
+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
From: kenny@osf.org (Kenneth Crudup)
Subject: Re: Worst Song and Lyrics Contest
Organization: Open Software Foundation
Date: Fri, 13 Nov 1992 22:32:14 GMT

In article <83550@ut-emx.uucp>
tracy@mojo.ots.utexas.edu (Tracy LaQuey Parker) writes:

>I would like to submit an entry for the Worst Song and Lyric contest...
>Anyway, the words go something like this:
>	"Loving you is easy 'cause you're beautiful
>	 and everytime that we oooooo, I'm more in love with you."

Blasphemer! You're actually gonna nominate Minnie Riperton's "Loving You"
as one of the worst songs ever? I bet she's turning in her grave.

The woman had a 5-octave voice, dude! (I am not making this up.)

	-Kenny

-- 
Kenny Crudup, Contractor, OSF DCE QA
OSF, 11 Cambridge Center, Cambridge, MA 02142	+1 617 621 7306
kenny@osf.osf.org			OSF has nothing to do with this post.
	  Religion: The longest-running gag ever played on Mankind.
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
From: hymowitz@zebra.cs.jhu.edu (Hymie!)
Subject: Re: Worst Rock Songs of All Time...
Organization: Creative Sensualities dept, Jacquie's House of Underwear
Date: Tue, 10 Nov 1992 03:09:53 GMT

and lo, there was much rejoicing among the people, as
  m14430@mwunix.mitre.org (Lawrence Larson) writes:
>Don't know if this Sunday's article was the same everywhere, but in the
>Washington Post, DB asked for fans' nominations for: 1) the Worst Overall [Rock]
>Song and 2) the Worst [Rock Song] Lyrics to be sent *ON A POSTAL CARD, NOT A
>LETTER* to:

or you can send it directly to him at
miami herald
1 herald plaza
miami, fl 33132

>So, if you missed election day, here's your chance to cast a really
>meaningful vote!

i sent mine in, but i ain't telling what it is - secret ballot, after all.

--hymie
hymowitz@cs.jhu.edu                                         hymie@jhuvms.bitnet
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
And who am I to judge you and what you say or do
I'm only just beginning to see the real you.                         --Dan Hill
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: maire@drycas.club.cc.cmu.edu
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
Subject: Reason for election results revealed in anagram
Date: 10 Nov 92 03:35:49 -0500
Organization: Carnegie Mellon Computer Club

I just read in another newsgroup that "Tuesday, November Third"
besides unscrambling to read "Many voted, Bush retired" also
unscrambles to read "Dave ruined by the storm."  Hence we have
an explanation of why Dave was not elected:  bad weather in certain
key precincts kept voters from getting to the polls and voting for
Dave!  It's a small consolation, but at least we know now.  
-Tina, who would have been Secretary of Treasure per order of DB
 maire@drycas.club.cc.cmu.edu
 maire@drycas.bitnet
From: irilyth@fenris.claremont.edu (Josh Smith)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
Subject: Re: Dave Barry on Larry King (radio) 11/12/92
Date: 12 Nov 92 22:54:47 GMT
Organization: HMC Academic Computing Services
Originator: irilyth@fenris

In a prior article, Ralph (rem@rockit.eng.sun.com) writes:
> The S.F. Chronicle lists Dave Barry on Larry King's Radio Talk Show
> this Thursday Nov 12.

Anyone know a time and station where one might catch this in the LA area?
Specifically the LA County/San Bernardino County line, but any sizable LA
station should do. Post or e-mail, as time may be of the essence... Thanks!
-- 
Josh Smith, User Support Coordinator  ::  irilyth@fenris.claremont.edu
Harvey Mudd College, Claremont CA     ::  consult(std-disclaimer.pl).
"Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why
several of us died of tuberculosis." -Jack Handey, Deep Thoughts
Organization: Junior, Architecture, Carnegie Mellon, Pittsburgh, PA
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
Date: Thu,  5 Nov 1992 13:15:05 -0500 
From: "Jason M. Roth" <jr4q+@andrew.cmu.edu>
Subject: Re: Dave Barry as President

>I remember reading that if Dave Barry was elected President the first
>thing he'd do is declare war on France. I can't remember the reason,
>though.

Probably 'cos we couldn't lose....

JMR
HSK
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
From: cec35848@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu (Chuck Carroll)
Subject: Re: Mr. Dave Barry, B.S.-Electoral College
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana
Date: Tue, 10 Nov 1992 05:43:31 GMT

bslavens@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu (Bradley E Slavens) writes:

>Does anyone know how many electoral votes DB got?

>By my projections, he should have carried Mississippi, DC, Guam, Japan (largely
>due to his recent campaign efforts there), Rocky Mountain National Park, 
>Hawley, Smoot, 90210, circa 1886, 'K' St., Lake Erie, Vogon, and, of course, 
>his home state Coral Gables ( or was that Coconut Grove ).

>He also was narrowly trailing Voltaire and Andre Marrou in France (due to some
>recent war threat).  IANMTU!!

>I think this adds up to 9 1/2 electoral votes, just shy of the 270 needed to
>win.

Yes, the October 8 election was very close.  He also took
area code 1 in the "Early U.S. area code map," which puts him over.

He will be inaugurated on October 8.

-- 
 Chuck Carroll					     cec35848@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu
*******************************************************************************
*			       Jack Kemp in '96!			      *
*******************************************************************************
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
From: matthews@lynx.dac.northeastern.edu (Matt Sullivan)
Subject: Re: DAVE BARRY DOES JAPAN
Organization: Northeastern University, Boston, MA. 02115, USA
Date: Wed, 11 Nov 1992 07:04:04 GMT

At Lauraits book store here in Boston, they have autographed copies of
DAVE BARRY DOES JAPAN for $18. If anybody from far away wants one,
e-mail me, and we'll see what we can do.


                  Matt Sullivan  Northeastern University
                    MatthewS@Lynx.Crc.Northeastern.Edu

                  --  Go U.Maine Black Bear Hockey!  --

Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
From: finnegan@invader.navo.navy.mil (Kenneth Finnegan)
Subject: Letter From Dave!
Nntp-Posting-Host-[nntpd-19426]: invader.navo.navy.mil
Reply-To: finnegan@navo.navy.mil
Organization: Grumman Data Systems	
Date: Mon, 9 Nov 1992 15:11:02 GMT

As previously suggested in this newsgroup, I too sent a letter
to Dave without a complete mailing address.  As a matter of fact,
the address read:

Dave Barry
Miami Herald

I put no return address, either.  In my letter, I said something to
the effect of "Dave, if you never receive this letter, you can write
a column about how incompetent the US Postal Service is.  HA! HA!"

Anyway, I received a response Friday!  It came on Official Dave
Barry For President letterhead. ("A Catchy Slogan Should Appear Here")
It read in full:

Kenneth,

I never got your letter.

Dave Barry
psychic



BTW, the secondary slogan on the parchment letterhead is:

"He`ll Keep Dan Quayle"

Is this a great guy, or what?

Well, it sure made my weekend!

Kenneth
finnegan@navo.navy.mil
From: wb8foz@skybridge.SCL.CWRU.Edu (David Lesher)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
Subject: Re: Worst Rock Songs of All Time...
Date: 10 Nov 1992 03:03:53 GMT
Organization: NRK Clinic for habitual NetNews abusers - Beltway Annex
Reply-To: wb8foz@skybridge.scl.cwru.edu (David Lesher)
NNTP-Posting-Host: skybridge.scl.cwru.edu

Others said
# Don't know if this Sunday's article was the same everywhere, but in the
# Washington Post, DB asked for fans' nominations for: 1) the Worst Overall [Rock]
# Song and 2) the Worst [Rock Song] Lyrics to be sent *ON A POSTAL CARD, NOT A
# LETTER* to:

Be sure & send a copy to Craig, too..


Did you also see he mentioned posting a message on the Herald
system, and he got flooded with replies?

Heck, wait till Dave meets talk.bizarre!
.......

--
A host is a host from coast to coast..wb8foz@skybridge.scl.cwru.edu
& no one will talk to a host that's close..........................
Unless the host (that isn't close).........................pob 1433
is busy, hung or dead....................................20915-1433
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
From: gak@wrs.com (Richard Stueven)
Subject: No Acronyms, Please!
Reply-To: gak@wrs.com
Organization: Wind River Systems, Inc.
Date: Fri, 6 Nov 1992 17:07:23 GMT

In article 20830@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu, bslavens@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu (Bradley E Slavens) writes:
>
>He also was narrowly trailing Voltaire and Andre Marrou in France (due to some
>recent war threat).  IANMTU!!

Alas, witness the demise of the last Usenet bastion against acronyms...

Seriously, would Dave approve of this bastardization of his Service
Mark?  (He _has_ registered it, hasn't he?)

---
Richard Stueven        gak@wrs.com         attmail!gakhaus!gak        107/H/3&4

How can you be ignorant of something you didn't know in the first place?
                                                      - Choo

P.S.  Not a flame, of course...a gentle prod.  (Cattle prod.)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
From: cottle@cmp-rt.music.uiuc.edu (David M. Cottle)
Subject: Re: Dave at National Press Club
Organization: University of Illinois School of Music
Date: Tue, 10 Nov 1992 19:44:28 GMT

In article <1992Nov10.154256.25219@u.washington.edu> cheri@carson.u.washington.edu (Cheri Campbell) writes:
>
>Does anyone know if (or when) Dave's appearance before the National
>Press Club on 11/12 will be broadcast on CSPAN?

I posted to our local info group (uiuc.general) and got the following:

| Saturday, November 14, 5:00 PM Central, on C-SPAN I.
| --
| Mitch Kazel (N9HDQ)                                PHONE:  (217) 333-1259
| Department of Journalism                             FAX:  (217) 244-3348
| University of Illinois                          INTERNET:  kazel@uiuc.edu



===============================
David Cottle                  =
Lime Consultant               =
CERL Sound Group at UIUC      =              Ballo ergo sum.
103 S Mathews                 =
Urbana, IL 61801              =              -des Cartwright
                              =
(217) 244-6686                =
Lime@uiuc.edu                 =
===============================
From: slj1k@cc.usu.edu
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
Subject: Re: Dave Barry on "Larry King Live" Thurs 11/12/92
Date: 12 Nov 92 17:31:38 MDT
Organization: Utah State University

In article <11NOV199215223061@cc.utah.edu>, jsb9718@cc.utah.edu (Jeff Bennion) writes:
> I heard on CNN that Dave Barry would be appearing on Larry King's CNN talk show 
> on Thursday night.  It starts in my time zone at 7:00 p.m. MST, I suppose that
> would be 9:00 p.m. EST.  He usually has two guests, and the show lasts two
> hours, and they didn't say exactly which portion of the show he would be on.



	not `the' jeff bennion, former president of utah state and, more
importantly, imho, my former landlord - JEFF WHAT'S UP?  hey, i tried to email
you but no one was home.  remember jennifer carr?  well we fell in love this
past summer (check the sig.) and she decided to go on a mission.  she is going
to moscow russia - she's in the mtc as we speak.  then she'll come home and
we'll get married - no joke.  sounds pretty idealistic, eh?  well i know it's 
a lot to swallow but it's all true.  gotta run, thanks for the post about DB.
 
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mark L. Reece     |  ``... and the trees are all kept equal by hatchet, axe and
SLJ1K@CC.USU.EDU  |  saw.'' - Neil Peart ``... uh, Viv, can you, like, actually
je taime, jen     |  kill yourself with laxative pills?'' - Neil, a young one.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: arras@bfws46.forwiss.uni-erlangen.de (Mike Arras)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
Subject: Dave finishes?
Date: 7 Nov 1992 18:03:25 GMT
Organization: FORWISS, Uni Erlangen, Germany
Distribution: world
NNTP-Posting-Host: bfws46.forwiss.uni-erlangen.de


	I heard singer Robert Smith of The Cure came in 23rd with 290
votes in our most recent elections.  My question is, in what place did
our hero Dave come in, and with how many votes?  Did anybody who reads
this group vote for him?  No!?  Are we really his fans or what?

Mike Arras
arras@forwiss.uni-erlangen.de
Organization: Penn State University
Date: Tue, 10 Nov 1992 08:26:11 EST
From: <EWN1@psuvm.psu.edu>
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
Subject: Rock Bottom Remainders video

Just wanted to let people know -- the Rock Bottom Remainders video is out
(and I have one!!).  Definitely a must have!
*************************************************************************
 Ellen Newman                     | You can name your own salary here --
 LCS - Library Computing Services | I call mine Fred.
 ewn1@psuvm.psu.edu               |       - taken from a Ziggy cartoon
 ************************************************************************
From: rem@rockit.Eng.Sun.COM (Ralph E. Miller)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
Subject: Dave Barry on Larry King (radio) 11/12/92
Date: 9 Nov 92 20:48:47 GMT
Reply-To: rem@rockit.Eng.Sun.COM
Organization: Sun Microsystems
NNTP-Posting-Host: rockit


The S.F. Chronicle lists Dave Barry on Larry King's Radio Talk Show
this Thursday Nov 12.

8pm on KFRC for those of you in the SF Bay Area.

-Ralph
From: mjenkins@alfred.carleton.ca (Michael Jenkinson)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
Subject: Dave on Larry King Live 11/12/92 -- a review
Date: 13 Nov 92 11:46:53 GMT
Organization: Carleton University

Seeing as no one else has done this yet....

Well *I* liked it. My initial fear was that because he was the last
guest, and that Cindy Crawford was on before him, that he'd get shoved
aside.

But lo and behold, after Cindy plugged her tape, MTV and Revlon for
the third time, she was gonzo and OUR HERO <tm> was on! For a full
thirty minutes! That's almost as much time as Ross Perot got!

Boy he's gotta do something about that hair!

Basically, the 30 minutes went like this:

Larry: "So tell us about...."

Dave: Something ranging from mildly amusing to uproariously hillarious.

This was broken only by....

Caller: Intelligent but funny question proving that he/she was a Dave
fan.

Everytime they cut back to CNN Centre in Atlanta <R>, the anchors were
smiling just a little more than usual. I swear Susan Rook was going to
lose it at one point.

For those of you who didn't catch it...I was the woman caller from Los
Angeles. I just post under a man's name from Ottawa because I like my
anonymity. <g>

Michael
From: leej@sgi.com (Lee Jones)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry
Subject: Re: No Acronyms, Please!
Date: 6 Nov 1992 21:17:44 GMT
Organization: Silicon Graphics, Inc.
NNTP-Posting-Host: diver.asd.sgi.com


Agreed.  The "I am not..." phrase is not funny in and of itself.  It requires
timing and appropriate delivery.  Acronymizing it destroys the verbal 
beauty, and the cadence, if you will.  Please, use it 
judiciously, and quote it in full when using it.


Regards, Lee
Newsgroups: alt.fan.matt.welsh,alt.test
From: mdw@theory.TC.Cornell.EDU (Matt Welsh)
Subject: Paradigm of Fish: Part 1
Followup-To: alt.fan.matt.welsh
Organization: Cornell Theory Center
Date: Tue, 10 Nov 1992 05:57:54 GMT

In case you guys are interested, I just posted the first installment of
my new series, The Paradigm of Fish, to alt.prose, talk.bizarre, and 
some other groups. 

If someone's too scared to read t.b I'll post it here. Hope you enjoy,

mdw

-- 
Matt Welsh    mdw@tc.cornell.edu        +1 607 253 2737
Systems Programmer, Cornell Theory Center
  "She's like jelly roll, like sculpture!"
Xref: sparky alt.fan.matt.welsh:120 alt.todd.green.likes.it.up.the.butt:28 alt.cascade:3202