From: icarter@nyx.cs.du.edu (Iona Carter)
Subject: Re: Wrong Surgery
Organization: Unseen University
Date: Sat, 21 Nov 92 03:50:06 GMT

In article <1ehc7kINNe71@flop.ENGR.ORST.EDU> hackbod@xanth.CS.ORST.EDU (Dianne Hackborn) writes:
>edw@psg.com (Ed Wright) writes:
>
>	[Lots of irrelevant stuff deleted]
>
>>You forgot..... in about 8 weeks your paycehck will be diminished by about 25%
>>:-(
>
>Ummm... just another good reason to think about a Change In Career?
>
>-- 
>Dianne Kyra Hackborn            The healthy .sig:

 I could handle it .... it would solve 70% of my problems :

Hi mum! Hi dad! Yes its me ... There was this mistake at the hospital ....

Seriously though, how do people handle their parents and other family? I know
that my parents would always love me what ever I did, but they would think of 
THEMSELVES as have failed completely. This just is not true, they have always
done the right things, and I am proud to be their daughter (son as they would
see it). They are both committed Christians (so am I) and it would completely
blow their world apart, my mother once told me her views on Transsexuals :

   "I feel a great deal of sympaty for them, it must be terrible having to
    go through all that, just to get to where you believe you should have
    started ... and they would miss out on so much not having seen child-
    hood from their "correct" perspective.
      But if someone suggested that one of my sons was that way inclined,
    I would probably punch their lights out (or words to that effect)".

  The circumstance giving rise to this was the arrival of a letter addressed
to me but as Miss not Mr., which turned out to be a brochure from an SRS
clinic I had sent for. Mother phoned the clinic and said that someone had 
obviously faked a letter from me. The clinic said that this sort of thing 
annoyed them too and they would send a copy of the letter (!) to us. Only 
some frantic phone calls to them prevented a potential disaster, they rang 
back and told my mother that it had been a telephone enquiry (phew!)
  So (simplistically speaking) I have four choices:

    1) Tell me parents, seek reassignment. The would shatter their lives.
    2) Dissappear, seek SRS. This would also shatter their lives.
    3) Remain an unhappy male. This would semi-ruin my life.
    4) Compromise. Live away, CD, get electrolysis, (hormones?) etc. but
       disguise myself as male when visiting them or vice versa.

  1) and 2) can be ruled out completely and out of hand as there is no way
that I could allow myself to ruin two (plus the rest of my families lives
just to put mine right.
  3) has some advantages, as I am (as a male) heterosexual i.e. I can only
love women an this would allow this easily. Though I usually spend too much
time wishing I WAS a particular girl to actually get round to asking them
out >8( . I suppose I could be termed a "male lesbian" but I will talk about
this another time, as I am to tired to try to figure it out (it is 3.20 am)
  4) Seems like the way to go, though it is hardly satisfactory (how easy
would it be to conceal the effect of hormones?)

  There are further complications but I will go into these when I get round
to posting my bio on cd-forum (the most fantastic discovery in years, one
day I was wondering how to get ANY info on being ts/tv from the people them-
selves the next I had access to more by mail than I knew what to do with 8))

Love and (mostly) transatlantic hugs,

Iona.                      (in the UK, Canterbury University in Kent)

PS. I know this is a bit of a generalisation, but roughly how long would it
    take to get hormones prescribed after the beginning of councilling, in
    the UK? How long would it take to get councilling for that matter on the
    NHS? 8( I am in my first year of university, and would find it impossible
    to dress "properly" most of the time (I could not risk people telling my
    parents so I cannot come out to people up here, though I wish I could.
    But maybe I'm using that as an excuse?). Would they still be prepared to
    prescribe me hormones in my situation? What other options do I have?
      I have heard of "breast development creams" do these work? Just how
    many of us from the UK are there on here anyway? Is it possible to go
    into a "Transformations" store (UK CDing company) and just have a look
    round for a few hours, no pressure? I can only just afford to get to
    London let alone buy anything. Just how big is their London shop anyway?
      Sorry to have waffled so much and to ask so many questions (I'm sure
    I could think of more ....8) but there is not much available to us in
    the UK, I have never heard of a support group, I know of only one
    Company offering CD type goods (though they go by various names).
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