HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: aahz@netcom.com (Mean Green Dancing Machine)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Can you accept criticism ? (who cares why lurk ...)
Date: 14 Sep 92 18:15:10 GMT
Organization: Bill 'n' Opus for Prez

In article <29166@hydra.Helsinki.FI> taina@cs.Helsinki.FI (Juha Taina) writes:
>
>Some people think that others know automatically what they mean.  They
>give subtle hints, get angry and perhaps later say nasty things to
>others.  It should be obvious enough that people can't read others'
>minds.  The only acceptable way to tell that something is bothering is
>to say (write) it aloud.

I used to completely agree with this.  However, as I grow older, I'm
learning that there are "accepted norms" for non-verbal communication
that member of any given society are expected to know.  For example,
everyone in America knows what a raised middle finger means.

No, you can't read people's minds, but if you can't follow the
"standard" non-verval cues, you may well suffer some ostracization.
-- 
                         --- Aahz (the *other* Dan Bernstein)
                             @netcom.com 

Hugs and backrubs -- I break Rule 6

IRWTFM -- and that ain't fun
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: richwing@leland.Stanford.EDU (Rich Wingerter)
Subject: Re: Boones Farm
Keywords: Kosher dills, half sours, dill dough, wines.....
Organization: DSG, Stanford University, CA 94305, USA
Distribution: na
Date: Sun, 13 Sep 92 06:07:24 GMT

In article <las8r8INN5uj@news.bbn.com>, dhardin@bbn.com (Dawn Hardin) writes:
|> Third:  While it's true that her majesty the baby was born in Boston,
|> I intend for her to spend enough time in the midwest where people are
|> sane that she'll escape this affliction.  No daughter of mine is going 
|> to be too stuffy to drink Strawberry Hill on appropriate occasions.

Heavens!  At least get her a good Chardonnay.  You aren't going to prop her
eyes open and make her watch reruns of Hee Ha, are you?


--Rich Wingerter
who grew up in Ohio, and does not intend in any way to slander the midwest
From: ahsiung@bbn.com (Anita Hsiung)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Appeal to Net.Wisdom
Date: 11 Sep 92 21:57:03 GMT
Reply-To: ahsiung@bbn.com (Anita Hsiung)
Organization: Bolt Beranek and Newman Inc., Cambridge MA
NNTP-Posting-Host: bbn.com

What can I say to a man to make him stop bothering me?  Let me define
"bother".  I met him for a total of two days last year.  Two lousy
days!  No romantic encounter.  Just him and his friends and I'm
showing them around town.  He goes home, starts calling me weekly.  I
disappear for a week, he starts calling me daily.  I get upset at him,
he stops calling.  That was five months ago.

He just called again.  He's going to be in town next month.  Ugh.  He
hasn't made any romantic overtures (he's very good about that, I'm not
sure I could bring a case against him!) and has only said friendly
things.  He wants to hang out for a few days after business.  Double
UGH!  A woman _knows_...

I'm not going batty over this.  He's not worth the time.  It's like an
itch in the back of your knee when you're wearing jeans.  Bothersome.
What do I say to him??

	-- Anita --

---------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Anita Hsiung       | "See how easy life can be?" -- Johnathan Raven     |
| ahsiung@bbn.com    |                                                    |
| BBN Canoga Park    | "Someday we'll look back on this moment...and      |
| California, USA    |  run smack into the car in front of us."  -- Ski   |
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: aaron@minster.york.ac.uk
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: chemistry / love at first sight : fact or fiction?
Date: 10 Sep 92 08:24:41 GMT
Organization: Department of Computer Science, University of York, England
X-Newsreader: Tin 1.1 PL5


Emma Williams (ewillims@unix1.tcd.ie) wrote:
: Women find men a challenge if they can't quite be totally sure of their
: devotion.  This can be brought to extremes by some, particularly by
: someone we all know who loses all interest in a guy the second he is
: "hooked" and then dumps him callously. She has a few hang-ups as you can 
: see!  But I do think that women don't generally like guys who act like
: doormats for them..there has to be a sense of excitement in a relationship
: and the desire to put some effort into the partnership.  If the guy is too
: mushy (initially anyway) then it can be a turnoff.

I experienced this from a woman I went out with once. At first she seemed
very enthusiastic but became less so when it became apparent that I was
always there for her. To a certain extent she seemed to equate my willingness
to do things for other people, give up my seat, etc., as unassertiveness.
She still seemed attached to her ex-boyfriend who had callously dumped her
and was a bit of a jerk anyway. Against that sort of competition I couldn't 
win and was becoming increasingly unhappy about the situation but she dumped
me first.

She said I was really nice, not like a typical man, but she had changed her
mind and decided to just be friends (no lets not start that again)

So perhaps it is true that some women expect men to treat them without
respect and be unresponsive and it is not that they don't like being 
treated well but it runs against their expectations so convincingly they
feel uncomfortable with the relationship?

	Aaron Turner		aarom@minster.york.ac.uk
From: 01ksdavis@bsu-ucs.uucp
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Help. Please?
Date: 7 Sep 92 06:27:02 GMT


	I already posted this to alt.romance for help, but I am posting it here
to see if anybody else is/was/ever has been in the same boat as I am, and what
you did about it.

	My ex-girlfriend (whom I really loved a lot, perhaps even more than life
itself) was going to go to this other college on a full-ride scholarship.  The
other day, she ran into me and a friend of mine, and we "talked."


	The "talk" didn't cover as much as it should have (because my friend was
there) and after the talk she gave me her phone number and told me to call her.

	BTW-during the talk, I found out she is in one of my classes.  As a 
matter of fact, I sat next to her last Thursday.  I did have trouble taking down
notes for some reason.

	Help!  Please?  Anybody else been here, know what I am talking about, or
is here right now?  What are you/ did you do about something like this.

	She has hurt me before.  Really bad.  Yet, like some demented moth, I
fly suicidally towards the flame.


			Kyle
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: escotoR@moravian.edu (Randall Escoto @ Moravian College Vampire CS Dept.)
Subject: Re: What knockers!  Crreak.
Date: Wed, 9 Sep 92 13:59:55 EDT

In article <1992Sep7.025433.429@peponi.wcc.govt.nz>, parks_typ@med.wcc.govt.nz writes:
> In article <14479@auspex-gw.auspex.com>, johnf@Auspex.COM (John Fereira) writes:
> >stand in the doorway she *will* brush her tits on me as she passes through.
> 
> Help me out here, guys (and girls).
> 
> I've had guys stick their elbows out purposely to brush my tits as I walk past. 
> How can they possibly get off on elbow contact?  The last I heard the elbow was
                        ^^^^^^^ 
> not an erogenous zone and it's rather painful to collide with one with your
> spongy bits!
> 
  *I* can't get off that way! ;> I prefer the use of more sesitive spots...
> 
> 
> Rachel

-Randy, just Randy

-- 
        *          |  Randall Escoto 
       ***         |  aka T'fel, blue Balarenth's rider, Fort Weyr     
*****************  |        DragonsFireMUSE  
   ***********     |
    *********      |  Logging from the 'Christmas City', Bethlehem
   ***** *****     |        Pennsylvania
  ***       ***    |
 **           **   |  Internet: escotoR@moravian.edu 
*               *  |  Phone#: (215) 434-0714/(215) 861-1319
Disclaimer: Any opinions expressed are entirely my own.
From: jmd@bear.com (Josh Diamond)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Singles Bar (Why would you want one?)
Date: 8 Sep 92 15:47:09 GMT
Organization: Bear, Stearns & Co. - FAST
In-reply-to: IZZYFU9@MVS.OAC.UCLA.EDU's message of 7 Sep 92 17:18:19 GMT


Hola!

In article <19920907101722IZZYFU9@MVS.OAC.UCLA.EDU> IZZYFU9@MVS.OAC.UCLA.EDU writes:
   Anyone have any recommendation to singles bar around Los Angeles or
   westwood area?

This post makes me wonder -- do people really enjoy spending time in
these meet/meat markets?  Every time that I have been to one I have
felt as though I am either expected to be shopping for merchandise, or
on display as merchandise.  I had enough of these places when I was in
school -- I didn't like them then, and I don't like them now.  They
seem to be fraternity beer-bash parties for superannuated freshman.

I think my problem with the concept is the fact that there is
absolutely no purpose for these places other than bringing bodies
together.  I would much rather meet people through common activities
than through the fact that we both happened to be drinking mediocre
beer in an overcrowded bar.  

The only times I have gone to a "singles bar" in the last several
years have been because someone I was visiting really wanted to go, or
because I didn't know where I was going.  The idea of going to a
"singles bar" of my own volition is as unlikely as water flowing
uphill.

My suggestion to the original poster is to avoid singles bars like the
plague.  Try getting involved in some group activities instead.  You
are much more likely to meet someone and create a relationship there
than in the "meat market".


						Spidey!!!


--
 /\ \  / /\  Josh Diamond                              		   jmd@bear.com
//\\ .. //\\ AKA Spidey!!!                        ...!ctr.columbia.edu!ursa!jmd
//\((  ))/\\
/  < `' >  \          Beauty is the purgation of superfluities. -- Michelangelo
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: dennisp@kpc.com (Dennis Preston)
Subject: Re: SHOULD I CALL MY EX-GIRLFRIEND?
Organization: Kubota Pacific Computer Inc, Santa Clara, CA
Date: Fri, 11 Sep 1992 22:21:22 GMT

In article <1992Sep10.175716.6271@TorreyPinesCA.ncr.com> shear@TorreyPinesCA.ncr.com (Jeff Shear 3769) writes:
>
>I broke up with my girlfriend about 2 months ago. Since
>then I haven't spoken to her.  I would like to call her
>just to say hi and see how she's doing--sort of to salvage
>a friendship out of a 6 month relationship.  It just seems
>so stupid that two people spend so much time together and
>then all of the sudden they never talk to one another again.
>She hasn't called me and I haven't called her.  Any advice
>out there would be greatly appreciated. I suppose that I 
>haven't called her because I'm afraid to find out how she
>might react to my call.
>
 There's no way to find out what her reaction will be if you *don't* call!
Someone has to make the first move if you intend to try and salvage a
friendship out of that relationship. Call her and say "Hi". Why not?

--Dennis
From: johnf@Auspex.COM (John Fereira)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: 'What the hell kind of a world do we live in...'
Date: 11 Sep 92 19:23:08 GMT
Organization: Auspex Systems, Inc.

In article <=mvn12g@lynx.unm.edu> blowfish@carina.unm.edu (rON.) writes:
>
>Ever have one of those weeks?

I have.  One day I saw a former co-worker kill himself and a passenger on a new
motorcycle in our work parking lot.  I left work early and when I arrived
home discovered that the kid that lived across from my parents house, and 
had watched grow up, had hung himself in the garage that day.  I called
a friend, and said "let's get out of here".  On our way out of town as
were going over a Pacheco pass the traffic came to a dead stop.  We spent the
next six hours sitting on the freeway waiting for a multi-car/semi truck
accident to be cleared.  The next day I met my ex-wife.

>Two of my close friends, in just the past 2 weeks, have both been diagnosed
>with cancers. One with cervical, one with a cancerous mass in his Thyroid
>gland. 
>Prompted the one with cervical cancer to say 'What the hell kind of a world
>do we live in where 25 year olds get cancer?'

An unfair one.

-- 
+==========================================================================+
| John Fereira     | Auspex Systems | "Auspex does not share my opinions.  |
| johnf@auspex.com | Santa Clara CA |  So Why am I still working here?"    |
+==========================================================================+
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: markh@csd4.csd.uwm.edu (Mark)
Subject: Major flirt (was: Re: Powerful forces of nature conspire)
Organization: Computing Services Division, University of Wisconsin - Milwaukee
Date: Mon, 7 Sep 1992 11:24:06 GMT

In article <ewillims.715856315@unix1.tcd.ie> ewillims@unix1.tcd.ie (Emma Williams) writes:
>	I'm speechless...but first of all, I'd like to thank my parents
>without whose support I could never have made it to where I am today...
>Oooops!  Wrong speech....sorry!:>

Trust me, you'll be giving that speech later, thanking your parents and
all other authorities for the truly wonderful gifts about to be bestowed
upon you.
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: Bathsheba.Grossman@bbs.oit.unc.edu (Bathsheba Grossman)
Subject: Re: Can we can the suck-up bit?
Keywords: encourage friendship?
Organization: Extended Bulletin Board Service
Date: Wed, 9 Sep 1992 03:19:54 GMT

In article <72095@apple.Apple.COM> stef@Apple.COM (Stef Jones) writes:
>tlode@nyx.cs.du.edu (trygve lode) writes:
>>Still, the best compliments are paid in private (now if I can just get
>>Bathsheba and Stef in private for a few compliments...).
...
>I'll come if Sheba does.

A generous suggestion.  How are your Gazongas? perhaps we won't have
to bother with Tryg at all & could just compliment one another.

-Sheba 	(And he can find himself a nice li'l corporate Ganymede so we'll
         all be happy)
--
   The opinions expressed are not necessarily those of the University of
     North Carolina at Chapel Hill, the Campus Office for Information
        Technology, or the Experimental Bulletin Board Service.
           internet:  bbs.oit.unc.edu or 152.2.22.80
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: jjd1@cbnewsg.cb.att.com (james.j.dutton)
Subject: Re: Boston Boink - Highlights
Keywords: Hairless Wonder, Police, Bananas
Organization: AT&T
Distribution: na
Date: Tue, 15 Sep 1992 18:29:46 GMT

In article <1992Sep15.174817.24562@gvl.unisys.com> liz@prc.unisys.com (Liz Loquacious) writes:
>|>  
>|> I love man baby jokes! Go on??????
>
>Go on?  About Peter?  I'll leave that to Dawn.  She does the best job
>describing him! :-)
>
 
No No. I want to hear the jokes?
 
>
>|> I promise as soon as I sell my house and move into a bigger house a Boink
>|> will occur.
>
>Well, while I still have my bigger house and before I sell it for something
>smaller I'm gonna have to have a Boink.  Not sure on when yet.  But we'll
>get some pizza there if you show up James!
>
>Liz Loquacious
 
Since your moving out what say we make it a sledgehammer party?
I assume John will be recording it all from a tree perched
conveniantly outside.

 
================================================================================
 Sesquipedalian's 'R' Us. ZX-10. DoD#564. There ain't no more.
================================================================================
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: liz@prc.unisys.com (Liz Loquacious)
Subject: Leg shaving (was Re: Desperation ...)
Followup-To: soc.singles
Organization: Paramax Systems
Date: Fri, 11 Sep 1992 16:19:35 GMT

In article <1992Sep10.210248.26905@panix.com>, pw@panix.com (Paul Wallich) writes:
|> In article <1992Sep10.150745.12405@gvl.unisys.com> liz@prc.unisys.com (Liz Loquacious) writes:
|> >
|> >Well, in addition to the mess in the sink you get the same, but larger,
|> >mess in the tub!  (Yes, women shave their legs too but we don't leave
|> >a mess in there, perfect creatures that we are. ;-))  And you get to feel 
|> >those nubbies growing back in too!  Never an issue in the relationship; just 
|> >one of those things....
|> 
|> And you get to have twice as many hassles over who uses whose
|> razor for what :-)
|> 
|> paul   scarred for life

Spoken from experience Paul?  Can I see those legs? ;-)

Liz Loquacious
From: stef@Apple.COM (Stef Jones)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: Working at a Relationship
Date: 5 Sep 92 20:17:07 GMT
Organization: Apple Computer Inc., Cupertino, CA

pw@panix.com (Paul Wallich) writes:

>The work on relationships is more like a high-wire
>act -- difficult, requiring intense concentration, occasionally panic
>inducing, sometimes painful, also often exhilarating.

And sometimes it is not difficult at all. Sometimes it feels as natural as
breathing.

No, I didn't believe it either, until it happened to me.

--
Stef                 Reality is that which, when you stop believing
stef@apple.com       in it, doesn't go away.
From: johnf@Auspex.COM (John Fereira)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: SHOULD I CALL MY EX-GIRLFRIEND? Let Jim do it.
Date: 11 Sep 92 19:29:25 GMT
Distribution: na
Organization: Auspex Systems, Inc.

In article <1992Sep11.184329.19557@cbfsb.cb.att.com> jjd1@cbnewsg.cb.att.com (james.j.dutton) writes:
|In article <1992Sep10.175716.6271@TorreyPinesCA.ncr.com> shear@TorreyPinesCA.ncr.com (Jeff Shear 3769) writes:
|>
|>She hasn't called me and I haven't called her.  
|
|Post the number and I'll check it out. Just to make sure it's cool.

While you've got her on the line find out if she has any seesters.

-- 
+==========================================================================+
| John Fereira     | Auspex Systems | "Auspex does not share my opinions.  |
| johnf@auspex.com | Santa Clara CA |  So Why am I still working here?"    |
+==========================================================================+
From: pemakine@klaava.Helsinki.FI (Pekka Makinen)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Re: uh oh...
Date: 12 Sep 92 21:50:43 GMT
Organization: University of Helsinki, Finland


 In <1992Sep12.195903.11141@blaze.cs.jhu.edu> 
 hymowitz@cs.jhu.edu (Captain Action Figure (tm)) writes : 
->a friend set us up, and we've spent the last week making very shy and
->tentative phone calls to each other.  finally, she found the nerve to
->come out and say 'look, i'm not doing anything, you're not doing anything,
->let's get togetther and do something.'  so she'll be here about a half-hour
->any minute now, and i'm relaxing the only way i know how - readnewsing.

     Well, good luck. Probably it's the start of a perfect relationship.


-- 
(   Pekka Makinen, Dept. of Med. Chem., University of Helsinki, Finland    )
(pemakine@cc.helsinki.fi pemakine@serifos.helsinki.fi pemakine@finuh.bitnet)
(         No opinions - no disclaimer - no money - no fun. Fiat lux.       )
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: huston@access.digex.com (Herb Huston)
Subject: Re: E.W. - Musk, garlic, pizza and other smells....
Organization: Express Access Online Communications, Greenbelt, MD USA
Date: Fri, 11 Sep 1992 21:52:42 GMT

In article <ewillims.716211647@unix1.tcd.ie> ewillims@unix1.tcd.ie (Emma Williams) writes:
>Apropos of body fragrances, what do you think of men's aftershaves/
>fragrances?  Is the consensus for or against?  Personally, I do
>like some of them (Fahrenheit makes me go weak at the knees and I 
>adore Tuscany or Eternity For Men) but they obviously must be 
>used in small doses.  

Aftershave: I never use it, but then the last time I shaved was May 16, 1975.
Fragrances: My sense of smell is somewhat impaired and has become worse, so
I tended to overdose.  Several years ago I stopped using the stuff and relied
on regular bathing, instead.

As for women's perfumes, I find them either undetectable or obnoxious.  I
prefer sweat as long as it's fresh.  If I caused it, so much the better!

-- Herb Huston


Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: ewillims@unix1.tcd.ie (Emma Williams)
Subject: Re: chemistry / love at first sight : fact or fiction?
Organization: Trinity College, Dublin
Date: Wed, 9 Sep 1992 15:01:53 GMT

In <1992Sep9.040523.8889@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> tlode@nyx.cs.du.edu (trygve lode) writes:


>It's traditional--after all, if the people you were interested in were
>also interested in you, it would probably upset the whole order of the
>universe.  

	And people might actually be "happy" (*gasp*). The fates 
would NEVER allow that! (*GRIN*)
 

>Plus, there's the slight problem that a good proportion of the population
>tends to find people who aren't interested in them more attractive than
>people who are interested in them. 

	Actually, I was discussing this very point today with a few
friends at lunch and we rather came to the conclusion that it was
mostly a "female thing". (Of course, the three of us were female so
that might have something to do with our conclusions! :)
Women find men a challenge if they can't quite be totally sure of their
devotion.  This can be brought to extremes by some, particularly by
someone we all know who loses all interest in a guy the second he is
"hooked" and then dumps him callously. She has a few hang-ups as you can 
see!  But I do think that women don't generally like guys who act like
doormats for them..there has to be a sense of excitement in a relationship
and the desire to put some effort into the partnership.  If the guy is too
mushy (initially anyway) then it can be a turnoff.
Well, do you guys feel the same way?  Do you hate it if the woman makes
it too obvious that she can't live without you?  Actually, I'm sure you
probably do...I have heard men complain before about "clingy" women!
 
    ____________________________________________________________________
    |   Emma Williams            | Folk sover ellers ikke godt op      |
    |   ewillims@unix1.tcd.ie    | ad en sultan tiger!                 |
    |				 |    Steen og Stoffer :->             |
    |____________________________|_____________________________________|


>Trygve  (6'4" -- who was just running a meeting earlier today in
>         which all of the programmers in the department are taller
>         than I am.) 

		Mmmmmmmm,....:)
	
Newsgroups: soc.singles
From: ewillims@unix1.tcd.ie (Emma Williams)
Subject: Re: E.W. - Weddings....
Organization: Trinity College, Dublin
Date: Fri, 11 Sep 1992 10:32:37 GMT

In <1992Sep10.160004.15330@maths.tcd.ie> pmoloney@maths.tcd.ie (Paul Moloney) writes:

>ewillims@unix1.tcd.ie (Emma Williams) writes:
>>Gabe writes:

>>>	Hmmmm, seems like you've been hanging around the wrong type of
>>>	Irishmen. Almost all the ones I know of, just-over-on-the-boat,
>>>	and most 1st/2nd generation Americans seem to have a certain affinity
>>>	to the game. 

>>	Hey, they don't count as Irish!  Only people born and bred in
>>Ireland are considered to be Irish.  They are Americans who just happen
>>to have Irish ancestry!

>Excuuuuuuuuuuuuuuse me, Ms. Williams! I take great exception at you 
>casting asparaguses on my nationality! 

	Shouldn't that be "asparagi"? :>

				OK, so I was born in England, but
>my parents were Irish, I lived most of my early life surrounded by
>Irish ex-pats, and the moved to Ireland when I was seven. I certainly don't
>feel English

	It's irrelevant that you were born in England!  (For that matter,
so was I ).  The point is that you have been raised over here (Thank
God! [*GRIN*])      

>Anyway, we're all supposed to be European now, so it doesn't really 
>matter anyway (viva Jacques Delore and allathat).

	Now if you had been raised in England you wouldn't be thinking
that way!!:>   (What's the betting that I'll now be flamed by some
english people?!!:)


>,           ,
>P. (with a fada)

	(*GRIN*)  Paul with a fada???  Maybe you aren't Irish after all!!:>