HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: petitc@nuge111.its.rpi.edu (Christopher Jon Petit)
Subject: Re: net.hugs?
Reply-To: petitc@rpi.edu
Organization: Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute, Troy, NY.
Date: Thu, 19 Nov 1992 14:03:21 GMT

In article <j#mqpg#@lynx.unm.edu>, blowfish@carina.unm.edu (rON.) writes:
|> In article <lgl06rINNqsi@news.bbn.com> dhardin@spcink.bbn.com (Dawn Hardin) writes:
|> >In that case, cross-posting to soc.singles is probably a *BIG* mistake.
|> >We're not very safe.
|> 
|> Actually we in soc.singles are quite safe.
|> We just simply expect people to stand up for themselves instead of being
|> propped up by everybody else in the group.


    Ok, mister, you asked for it...


   Can YOU do EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO by yourself?  Hmmmm?
   Can YOU make your very own cars FROM SCRATCH?
   Can YOU make all the things you take for granted?
   And are you saying that, if you get sick you don't go to doctors?

   I THINK NOT!   EVERYONE needs to work to help support each other---if you
people over in soc.singles generally feel that independance is _the_ ideal, then
you're saying that the way to live is "Screw everyone else---get what you want
out of life regardless of how it affects others."

   Sorry if I seem a bit pissed, but I really despise people who live under the
delusion that people NEVER need help from other people.

-- 
 *HUGS*, a @>---'--,----, and a :&) to whoever needs them.
"Whoever said that life was fair never read the rules, and found out that
there were none."
"Mysteries are for detectives; confusion is what the rest of us get."
From: dswt@bnr.co.uk (Stewart Tansley)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: A Question
Date: 17 Nov 1992 13:57:32 GMT
Organization: BNR Europe Ltd, London Road, Harlow, England.
NNTP-Posting-Host: 128.199.202.41

In article <l0t1a#b@rpi.edu> petitc@rpi.edu writes:
>
>  If you _knew_ you had to break up with your SO, no way out, would you want
>to have an exact date, or not?  And what would you do before the imminent
>breakup?

Whad'ya mean here? If I was on the receiving end of the surprise, you mean?

Ok, yup, if I was gonna be the potential victim of some surprise "it's all
over after today, baby", when my RP knew it was going to "have to" end
today much further back, I would be extremely annoyed not to have been 
told/prepared earlier on.

I bet you people split right down the middle on this in reality though
(even if it's not detectable from the posts). And I can see it both ways.

===========================================================================
Stewart Tansley     | BNR Europe Limited              |  'Be cool, or be
                    | London Rd, Harlow, CM17 9NA, UK |    cast out...'
dswt@bnr.co.uk      | +44 279 429531 x2763 (ESN 742)  | Subdivisions, Rush
===========================================================================
  'You know how that rabbit feels -- going under your speeding wheels...'
===========================================================================
Xref: sparky alt.romance:14224 soc.singles:31079
From: martinc@hatteras.cs.unc.edu (Charles R. Martin)
Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.singles
Subject: Re: net.hugs?
Date: 18 Nov 92 02:59:44 GMT
	<1992Nov17.112806.11601@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu>
Followup-To: alt.romance
Organization: UNC Department of Computer Science
In-reply-to: tlode@nyx.cs.du.edu's message of 17 Nov 92 11:28:06 GMT

In article <1992Nov17.112806.11601@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> tlode@nyx.cs.du.edu (trygve lode) writes:

   In article <31517@hydra.Helsinki.FI> taina@cs.Helsinki.FI (Juha Taina) writes:
   >In <13NOV92.21925419.0026@lafibm.lafayette.edu> CE42@lafibm.lafayette.edu (CE42000) writes:
   >>>I too am new to this news group so hi, y'all.  I was ungraciously dumped
   >>Hi! *hug* and welcome to ARC!
   >
   >I'd like to ask why people share *hugs* and *kisses* on the net.  What
   >is the value of them?  Would you also hug and kiss a stranger in real
   >life?

   Why not?  I've licked whipped cream off a few strangers (and enjoyed it);
   I don't see how hugging them could be much more outre'.

   Trygve    (I am very picky, however--I don't lick just any stranger.) 

Shouldn't all this discussion of who could like whom be attached to the
violence thread?
--
		Charles R. Martin/(Charlie)/martinc@cs.unc.edu
     Dept. of Computer Science/CB #3175 UNC-CH/Chapel Hill, NC 27599-3175
	    3611 University Dr #13M/Durham, NC 27707/(919) 419 1754
     "Oh God, please help me be civil in tongue, pure in thought, and able
      to resist the temptation to laugh uncontrollably.  Amen." -- Rob T
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: zell@ux1.cso.uiuc.edu (Joseph Zell)
Subject: Re: Is it me?
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana
Date: Wed, 18 Nov 1992 02:57:18 GMT

jaker@csugrad.cs.vt.edu (Jake Rose) writes:

>weird@cbnewsf.cb.att.com (john.t.erhardt) writes:


>>To my last post I just wanted to add something.  Christian teach that
>>sex should only be used between maried couples and for making babies only.
							 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
>>Well if sex was for making babies, it wouldn't feel so good!

First of all, I know of very few Christians who teach that.  I'm sure they're out
there, but let's not try and over-generalize, ok?
Joe
-- 
Joe Zell               * "Never fear, Duncan. Good will overcome.
zell@ux1.cso.uiuc.edu  * Trust in that.."
                       *   -Sir Locksley, *Robin Hood, Prince of Theives*
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Help, I need advice...
From: dgartner@onza.gac.edu (David M Gartner)
Date: 17 Nov 92 22:03:44 -0600

In article <1e9qlfINNc8a@usenet.INS.CWRU.Edu>  writes:
> 
> 
> 	I just developed a very close friendship with someone that I am
> very interested in, but there is a problem. I have already attempted to 
> become romantically involved with her, but she politely told me she  
liked 
> us better as friends even though she was interested herself. The reason
> why she did not want to start a relationship was because she abruptly  
ended
> one about 3 months ago for no specific reason, and she still has this  
other
> person in her heart. This other guy is dating someone, and he treats her  
like
> yesterday's trash, but there are sometimes when she REALLY hates him,  
and there
> are sometimes when she doesn't know how to feel about him. How can I  
persuade 
> her to put this other guy out of her mind? She will not start a  
relationship
> on such shaky grounds. If I can do that, how do I tell her how I feel,  
already
> failing once? Please send me advice, or post it here. Thanks in advance.
> 				-Chris (lonlier than ever)
> 				csr4@po.CWRU.Edu
> -- 
> "Feeling a little down? Do what I do, look in the mirror and say to  
yourself,
>  'I can cope! I can cope! I can cope!' Then go back to bed, that's  
enough for
>  one day"


Chris,

I hope you have a comfortable chair to sit in because you just have to  
wait for her. You can't force anything.  Just hang around and be cool, be  
a friend and she may see the "good" boyfriend qualities in you.  On the  
other hand, you could be risking sitting around waiting for to fall for  
someone else.
	I personally waited for awhile continued to see no interest in me.   
Then I stumbled upon my dream girl.
--
David M. Gartner
dgartner@nic.gac.edu
"I learned more trying to beat the system
then I ever did from the system."  R. Crozier
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: fippen@ux2.cso.uiuc.edu (J. Fippen)
Subject: Two hearts can meet....................
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana
Date: Thu, 19 Nov 1992 13:37:59 GMT

	Recently it's been said that "Romance is fiction" and I want to label that as 
the myth it is. But there is no denying the fact that romance is a gentler 
meeting of two hearts and that such a joining generally doesn't take place in 
high intensity situations or crowds. Romance must be given a chance, and that 
chance will come in situations such as: sitting in the grass on the quad at UI 
and talking until 3 am (this happened to us in '47, but no one would do it 
today because we'd both probably get beat up and she might get raped); take a 
long walk in the woods holding hands ( Naveena Michael mentioned this in her 
post ); walking along a beach on a moonlight night (this has great appeal to me 
because in Illinois beaches are rare); a picnic for 2 in the park; a long 
telephone call or an internet chat (I've never done this but I know two hearts 
can touch when far apart); or maybe a canoe ride for two down a river or along 
a lake front.
        These are some ideas; there are hundreds more. Just remember that 
romance thrives in gentler places, not at a cocktail party with 40 people 
present. And bars are the absolute worst; whiskey breath will chill the most 
ardent heart.
        I know these things because I've loved my wife for 45 years and 
experienced many of them and wish to experience the others. Romance does not 
die when you're 70. Sex is for the moment, but love is for life.

John Fippen   married 43 years and still love my wife.
                                email       fippen@ux2.cso.uiuc.edu


Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: oopcv@Msu.oscs.montana.edu
Subject: Re: wish me luck results
Reply-To: oopcv@Msu.oscs.montana.edu
Organization: Montana State University
Date: Mon, 23 Nov 1992 15:04:11 GMT

In article <Q1HTB541@cc.swarthmore.edu>, chorwit1@cc.swarthmore.edu (Cathy Horwitz) writes:
>					Now the only problen is how do I get over lusting over him?  I want to
>date him badly, and I'm spending about 50% of my time thinking about him. 
>At the moment there is really no chance, so I wish I could just get over
>it.
>																																											Cathy
Gee, do you always give up so easily?

We just had a discussion about "timing" in this group;  maybe you just need to
be patient.  If you want him that badly, you'll still want him next month or
next year.
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: "Made" or "Just Happens"?
From: dgartner@onza.gac.edu (David M Gartner)
Date: 17 Nov 92 22:17:01 -0600

In article <BxvBr5.GD0@acsu.buffalo.edu>  writes:
> 
> 	There has been an on-going argument as to whether or not  
relationships
> have to be planned or just happen.  Do you need a plan and a strategy to  
find
> that special SO or do you play the waiting game and let nature take its  
course?
> Does it just happen or do you have to make it happen?  etc.
> 	This reminds me of an episode I saw on Donahue or Oprah or one of  
those
> stupid shows years ago.  There were four doctors/shrinks/specialists on  
the show
> that had all written books on relationships; how to get involved in one,  
what to
> do when in one, etc..  Three out of the four people's books and beliefs  
painted
> a picture of smilely faces and roses: if you are a good loving person,  
good 
> things will come to you, be yourself, happy, happy, gag, gag.  The forth  
guy
> was an author of one of those "how to pick up chicks" books.  Basically,  
the
> whole show was the three "happy" people, the host, and the majority of  
the 
> audience verbally abusing this one guy.  However, there were people in  
the 
> audience, both men and women, who found what this guy had to say to be  
true and
> were shocked by the way the majority saw this situation through  
rose-colored
> glasses.  These people said that it's not all that easy to find that  
special
> someone, that it's a game that has to be played over and over again.
> 	So what's my point?  I want to know how other people feel about  
this.
> Myself, I think that anyone who doesn't see that relationships are made  
and
> don't just happen are either A) Living in a fantasy world, B) Been in a 
> relationship too long to remember what it is like, or C) One in a  
million that
> were lucky enough to experience "love at first sight".  So let's here  
it:
> Does it just happen or do you have to make it happen?
> 
> - Just wondering...
>   Mike Poe

	I used to think that you had to make things happen.  But I think  
you just have to be aware of what is happening around you. That's when  
things happen to you.
	However, yes, I was lucky this last time, the one in million "love  
at first sight", happened to me. I haven't known her for that long but  
everything I know about her I love.  And I know has I grow to know her, my  
love for her will also grow.

--
David M. Gartner
dgartner@nic.gac.edu
"I learned more trying to beat the system
then I ever did from the system."  R. Crozier
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: thom@cac.washington.edu (Thom Roholt)
Subject: Re: Is it me?
Organization: UW Networks and Distributed Computing
Date: Wed, 18 Nov 1992 19:46:51 GMT

In article <1992Nov13.211341.19205@cbfsb.cb.att.com> weird@cbnewsf.cb.att.com (john.t.erhardt) writes:
>
>To my last post I just wanted to add something.  Christian teach that
>sex should only be used between maried couples and for making babies only.
>Well if sex was for making babies, it wouldn't feel so good!
>
>John Erhardt


WHATEVER!  Yes, Christians teach that sex should be saved for marriage.  NO,
sex is not only for making babies!  It says in the bible (excuse the lack
of a biblical reference) that after the man and the wife become married
they shall become one (i.e. sex).  Not in one place does the bible say
that sex is for procreation only.  Yes, some sects of the church preach
this, but at least in my opinion (and many others for that matter) that is
completely and utterly false.  Don't bash out of ignorance.  Think before
you make broad generalizations!

Thom
From: chorwit1@cc.swarthmore.edu (Cathy Horwitz)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: wish me luck results
Date: 22 Nov 92 18:18:09 GMT
Organization: Swarthmore College

Hi All,
					Today is Sunday, and I just got a call from "the guy."  he said that
he couldn't come to dinner, but he was very nice about it and he had a good
excuse.  He broke up with a two year girlfriend yesterday.  Don't I have
bad timing.  He said maybe we could do dinner some other time which is
good.  I think I will introduce myself sometime next week because he still
doesnt know who I am.  	
					He has the most beautiful voice.  Too bad that the only time I've
heard it it was rejecting me.  He said that he was very flattered and sorry
that he couldn't come.  
					Now the only problen is how do I get over lusting over him?  I want to
date him badly, and I'm spending about 50% of my time thinking about him. 
At the moment there is really no chance, so I wish I could just get over
it.
																																											Cathy
From: dswt@bnr.co.uk (Stewart Tansley)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: The Scariest Words In The World?
Date: 20 Nov 1992 13:32:43 GMT
Organization: BNR Europe Ltd, London Road, Harlow, England.
NNTP-Posting-Host: 128.199.202.41
Keywords: AIEEEEGH!

In article <stone.722181250@cwis> stone@cwis.unomaha.edu (Travis Stone) writes:
>
>I'm trying to compile a list of the top ten scariest words
>or phrases you could ever hope to (not) hear in regards to
>romance or romantic situations---so y'all feel free to pitch
>in and contribute, y'hear?
>
>So far, I've come up with:
>
>"...He/She has a NICE PERSONALITY." (Blind date)

Just wanted to say that a worse one for me rather than the latter was:

"...He/She was INTERESTING." (Blind date)

Yup, some woman used that one on me! *But*, and this is the best bit, I
used the same against her!!! (independently). Put me off blind dates as well... 
:-(

Still, I met her a few months later. Never guess what. I thought she
looked *wonderful*. (Ah, you did.) Life... :-(

PS. I liked a lot of the other lines the poster suggested though. Nice one.

===========================================================================
Stewart Tansley     | BNR Europe Limited              |  'Be cool, or be
                    | London Rd, Harlow, CM17 9NA, UK |    cast out...'
dswt@bnr.co.uk      | +44 279 429531 x2763 (ESN 742)  | Subdivisions, Rush
===========================================================================
  'You know how that rabbit feels -- going under your speeding wheels...'
===========================================================================
Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.singles
From: kevin@nuchat.sccsi.com (Kevin Brown)
Subject: Re: Being Alone?
Organization: I can't see any in the immediate vicinity...
Date: Mon, 16 Nov 1992 22:23:07 GMT

In article <1992Nov16.174809.9605@nuchat.sccsi.com> I write:

[...]

>Since the posting I'm responding to is from someone who obviously needs
>a Plan (if not a Clue :-), I'll detail what my plan was later on, for those
>of you who haven't already seen it.

And then I go on to *not* detail what my plan was.  So here it is.

The idea was to (a) maximize my encounters with eligible women, and (b)
maximize my attractiveness to those women.

The first I did by joining a couple of social groups and investigating other
interests (at least, the latter was planned, but I managed to find a girlfriend
before I was actually able to do that.  I'll still investigate things like
scuba diving and sailing, if only to increase my worldly experience).

I took several simultaneous approaches to the second.  To start with, I took
a number of classes on communication, dating, etc.  This proved to be
helpful because it gave me a handle on how to conduct conversations with
women without getting blown out of the water.  I started working out.   After
all, the more physically attractive I am, the better my chances are, right?
I also decided to be very aggressive in approaching women and starting
conversations with them.  I sometimes fell flat on my face when doing that,
but I think it had as much to do with lack of interest on their part as
anything else.  But the general idea is that I would hopefully learn (perhaps
very slowly) how to conduct an interesting conversation with any woman I
was interested in.

Between all that, I figured it would simply be a matter of time before I
would find someone who was as interested in me as I was in them.  That
seems to have happened.  :-)

You *have* to take an active role in getting your romance life together.
It's not a good idea to rely on it happening on its own.  As so many of
you have probably discovered, it's rare that it happens on its own.


-- 
Kevin Brown					kevin@nuchat.sccsi.com
This is your .signature virus: < begin 644 .signature (9V]T8VAA(0K0z end >
	    This is your .signature virus on drugs: <>
			Any questions?
From: kmc8z@Virginia.EDU ("***** Tina C *****")
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: letters, opinions, women, romance
Date: 15 Nov 92 20:02:55 GMT
Organization: University of Virginia

another great option for letters that my SO enjoys are those
slightly steamy ones....but don't send them when you aren't
going to see them for awhile...it definately makes snail mail
interesting....but maybe this comment should be in alt.sex?

it definately is a wake-up call...and spreads smiles!

:*)

tina
From: bzb47596@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu (Baba Z Buehler)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: I'll Call You
Date: 17 Nov 92 23:51:04 GMT
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana

oopcv@Msu.oscs.montana.edu writes:

>Okay, guys.  What does "I'll call you," REALLY mean.  I'm fairly sure it's a
>handy exit line that doesn't really mean anything, and I don't expect much
>whenever I hear it.  But I'm wondering if there are any tips on how to tell if
>a guy's just saying it or he really means it (aside from the obvious, i.e.
>waiting for the phone to ring).  How often have you said it, intending to call,
>but then changed your mind?  And why?


When I say "I'll call you" I do.  I can't really remember any time that I
didn't, but I don't say exactly that very much.  I tend to say something
like "We'll have to do this again" or "It was enjoyable, I'll see you
soon."  Or even "dig me up again sometime."  

I think the question should be other things to say.  What could men say
that doesn't have the (un)intended meaning of "i'll call you."?  I have 
become aware that things I say, which have little meaning to me, might
have great significance to someone else, and therefore try to be more
specific in my meanings, or something.

Comments?
-- 
Phaedrus - Master of the Tao of Pooh             internet: phaedrus@uiuc.edu 
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
     "The intelligent man finds almost everything ridiculous,
      the sensible man hardly anything."   --Goethe
Xref: sparky alt.romance:14450 soc.singles:31632
From: infante@acpub.duke.edu (Andrew  Infante)
Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.singles
Subject: Re: net.hugs?
Date: 23 Nov 92 20:19:36 GMT
Followup-To: alt.romance
Organization: Duke University; Durham, N.C.

In article <lgnjnfINNldj@news.bbn.com> dhardin@spcink.bbn.com (Dawn Hardin) writes:
>In article <MARTINC.92Nov18222436@hatteras.cs.unc.edu> martinc@hatteras.cs.unc.edu (Charles R. Martin) writes:
>>
>>I would like to know more about these zerbit's though.
>
>A zerbit is when one takes a baby, pulls its undershirt up to bare its
>chubby little stomach, puts one lips onto bare stomach, and says "BLLLBPTH!"
>The baby then squeals with joy, and rips a handful or two of hair out to
>show its appreciation.
>
>I suppose you could do it to older people to, but they probably won't squeal
                              ^^^^^^^^^^^^              ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
>and as far as I'm concerned that's the whole point.
>
>Dawn
>
So, Dawn, if I knew where you were,

had the time, 

the money, 

and the energy...

you're telling me, 

and the rest of the net-land, 

that you wouldn't SQUEAL like a little baby, 

if I were to put my lips to your bare stomach...

and say "BLLFTHBTH" at least once?

hm.

later.

andy
>Joseph Campbell gave me hope and now I have been saved.
>"Folk Song" by Bongwater
Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.singles
From: cburian@ux4.cso.uiuc.edu (Christopher J Burian)
Subject: Re: Description of the Fetal Remains from an Abortion
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana
Distribution: na
Date: Wed, 18 Nov 1992 01:07:20 GMT

dsh@eceyv.ncsu.edu (Woody Allen) writes:
 
 [Decidedly un-romantic stuff]

 Feel free to fill Woody's mailbox with his own post!

 Please forgive me for paying any attention at all to the intrusion. -Chris

Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.singles
From: michele@dgbt.doc.ca (Michele Guillet)
Subject: Re: net.hugs?
Organization: The Communications Research Centre
Date: Wed, 18 Nov 92 13:08:50 GMT

In article <8cx16zg@rpi.edu> petitc@rpi.edu writes:
>
>  I think people don't *HUG* each other nearly enough.  We all NEED to be
>touched.  That's what's wrong with the U.S.  We're too selfish to touch other
>people and acknowledge that we DO need other people's attention and affection.
>So, we use the only 'acceptable' way to need someone---when you're in love.
>
I agree with you. I think we forget easily that touch is needed, 
infants that aren't held don't develop normally. It is sad when the
house pet gets more attention and touch than the people living there.
I have notice that friends who comes to my house will almost always
pet my dog but often will not hug me or kiss me. Of course, my dog
is hard to ignore, she makes it clear that she wants and expects
a pet. I learned from her to ask for hugs and kisses, know what,
I am getting a lot more since I started asking.


-- 
Michele Guillet 			The Communications Research Centre 
3701 Carling Avenue, Ottawa, Ontario, CANADA, K2H 8S2	tel:613-998-2384
Internet: michele@dgbt.doc.ca	
Xref: sparky alt.romance:14098 soc.singles:30848