From: Nick.Zitzmann@f9.n343.z1.fidonet.org (Nick Zitzmann)
Newsgroups: k12.chat.junior
Subject: RE: Stuff
Date: Wed, 16 Dec 92 20:18:14 PDT
Organization: FidoNet node 1:343/9 - The Precedent, Mukilteo WA

Greetings to Mary Kay Davis from the Pacific Northwestland USA!

 MKD> I love blonde jokes! (I'm a brunette)...And I know quite a 
 MKD> few. My favorite is"What's the best thing about being married 
 MKD> to a blond?" Answer? "You get to park in the handicapped zone!" 
 MKD> HeHe...Sorry if that offends anyone

ROTFL! Here's some more, and I hope no one takes offense at these:

These were taken off America Online and I didn't do anything to them...

why did the blond return the refrigerator 
because there was no food in it

Why did the blonde pick all of the green tomatoes off the vine?
To make room for the red ones!

What do blondes and turtles have in common?
Once there on thier backs thier both screwed

DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE TWO BLONDES WHO DROVE TO DISNEYWORLD AND WHEN THEY SAW
THE SIGN "DISNEYW0RLD LEFT", THEY TURNED AROUND AND WENT HOME.


Why did the blond stare at the glass of Orange juice for over 2 hours?
Cause the label on the container said "Concentrate"!

What do you call a dead blond in a closet?
The 1983 Hide & Seek champion!


WHAT DO YOU HAVE WHEN A BLOND STANDS ON HER HEAD?
A BRUNETTE WITH BAD BREATH!!!!!!!

What is the difference between a blond and a Beagle?
They both can bury a 7 foot bone but, one does not get it's nose dirty.


WHAT DO BLONDS AND SCREEN DOORS HAVE IN COMMON???
THE MORE YOU BANG.....THEM...THE LOOSER THE BECOME


Why is it so hard to make a blond snowman?
Ever try to make a hollow snowball?


What goes Blonde, brunette, blonde, brunette,...etc......?
A Bleach Blonde doing cartwheels!

What's the difference between a prostitute and two blonds?
Regular price, 4 bucks, 4 bucks$$$

Varoom, Skreech!   Varoom, Skreech!  Varoom, Skreech?
A blond driving through an intersection with a flashing red light . . .

2 blondes were walking through a forest when they came to a set of 
tracks.  The 1st blonde says "Look, deer tracks!"  The 2nd blonde looks at her
& says "what are you #@*&%# stupid or something? those are obviously bear
tracks!"  The 1st says "Don't swear at me those are deer tracks I tell you not
bear tracks!"  The 2nd blonde then takes a swipe at the 1st & before you know
it a fight ensues & the 2 blondes are rolling around wrestling, pulling hair,
gouging their eyes out, and then the train runs them over. 

What is the difference between a blond and a bowling ball?
You can only fit three fingers into a bowling ball.

What is the difference between a blond and a telephone booth?
You can only fit three guys into a telephone booth at a time.

Why is there no Blonds in kattle ranching?
Because they can't keep their calfs together!


what does a blond and a computer have in common?
you don't appreciate  either one until they go  down on you!!

Why was the blond so excited she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 3 months?
Because it said "2-4 years" on the box.

The ultimate oxymoron has got to be
     "Brand New Blonde Joke"

And now for a few of my own...

A blonde wakes up under a cow. What does he/she say?
"I thought I told you guys to go home..."

How do you drown a blonde?
Put a scratch-and-sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool!

What do you call a blonde that dies his/her hair brown?
Artificial Intelligence

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb?
How would they know what a light bulb is, anyways?

...and the list goes on...

 MKD> Yeah, I've got a printer...my trusty ImageWriter II. My school 
 MKD> has awesome lazer printers that I really like using...but we 
 MKD> don't get to very often...oh well

Oooo... The ImageWriter II, the Laser Killer! 8-> No just kidding, don't know
why I said that. The IW II has color, do you have that on yours? And our
school has only one Apple laser printer, the Personal LaserWriter NT.

 MKD> So what's happening in your life?! Not too much here! Sorry 
 MKD> this is so short...I don't have a heck of a lot of time...and 
 MKD> I've got to reply to some other messages

Same! It's snowing! Nick 8->

 * COUNTERPoint 2.1 (QWK) NR * 


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