From: itchy.caltech.edu!nathan (Nathan Mates)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: request for beer better than girls joke
Date: 21 Nov 1992 06:28:12 GMT
Organization: California Institute of Technology, Pasadena
Distribution: usa
NNTP-Posting-Host: itchy.caltech.edu
Originator: nathan@itchy

In article <1992Nov20.171334.15011@news.Hawaii.Edu>  
bill@gaza.uhcc.Hawaii.Edu (William J. King) writes:
> 
> anyone got a copy of the beer better than girls lines.
> thanx
> 
> --
>     bill@uhunix.bitnet 
>     bill@uhunix.uhcc.Hawaii.Edu 
>     21.19 N.LAT by 157.52 W.LONG          
>     Fish on the Byte

52 Good reasons why Beer is Better than Women!!!
1. You can enjoy a beer all night long.
2. Beer stains wash out.
3. You don't have to wine and dine beer.
4. A beer will wait in the car while you go and play football.
5. When your beer goes flat, you toss it out.
6. Beer is never late.
7. A beer doesn't get jealous when you grab another beer.
8. Hangovers go away.
9. Beer labels come off without a fight.
10. When you go to a bar, you can always pick up a beer.
11. Beer never has a headache.
12. After you've had a beer, the bottle is still worth 5 cents.
13. A beer won't get upset if you come home and have another beer.
14. If you pour a beer right, you'll always get good head.
15. A beer goes down easy.
16. You can have more than one beer in a night and not feel guilty.
17. You can share a beer with your friends.
18. You always know you're the first one to pop a beer.
19. Beer is always wet.
20. Beer doesn't demand equality.
21. You can have a beer in public.
22. A beer doesn't care when you come.
23. A frigid beer is a good beer.
24. You don't have to wash a beer before it tastes good.
25. If you change beers, you don't have to pay alimony.
26. You can't catch social diseases from a beer.
27. When you're interrupted by a beer it's for a good reason.
28. A beer is always satisfying.
29. A beer gets lighter the longer you hold it.
30. A beer won't tell you its pregnant for fun.
31. A beer does not come with in-laws.
32. No matter what the package, a beer still looks good.
33. To cool off a beer, all you have to do is put it in the ice box.
34. All you have to do to get over a beer is take a leak.
35. Beer doesn't complain about farting.
36. The only thing a beer tells you is when its time to go to the  
bathroom.
37. You are never embarrassed about the beer you bring to a party.
38. Its okay to leave a party with a different beer than the one you  
brought.
39. Beer won't drive you to drink.
40. You can shoot a beer.
41. A beer chaser is easier to catch.
42. You don't need a license to live with a beer.
43. A tree is good enough for a beer.
44. Beer doesn't grow hair where it shouldn't.
45. Beer doesn't care how much you earn.
46. Beer and "ice" don't mix.
47. Beer won't complain about your choice of vacation--it goes along  
happily.
48. Beer doesn't care if you go to sleep right after you've had it.
49. Beer is happy to ride in the trunk of your car.
50. You never have to promise to respect a beer in the morning.
51. Beer never complains about a wet spot.
52. You can put all your old beers together in one room and they won't  
fight.


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*I ALSO HAVE:       (ASCII/RTF Format)                              *
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*      Bill Clinton Jokes   Lawyer Jokes     Blonde Jokes           *
*Monty Python Plagarisms: (Scripts to)                              *
*      Monty Python & The Holy Grail         Meaning of Life        * 
*      Life of Brian (Incomplete, as far as I know)                 *   
*Computer Humor:                                                    *
*      Bastard Operator From Hell-- Computer series                 *
*      Computer Jokes       Hacker Test 1.1                         *
*      Real Programmers...  Nerd Tests                              *
*Other Stuff:                                                       *
*      Lightbulb Jokes      Car Acronyms                            *
*      Murphy's Law stuff   Answering Machine Messages              *
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*      Joke Forms           Chicken Cross Road Explanations         *
*      Various Insults      Lists of Everything                     *
*      Mommy^2 Jokes        Star Trek Parodies                      *
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*  A .sig designed to keep me busy for quite a while                *
*  YES! It's bigger and better than it was a few days ago! And      *
*   it'll keep on growing until I hit 5 Megs!                       *
*********************************************************************
* Nathan Mates                nathan@cco.caltech.edu                *
*********************************************************************
-- 

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*I ALSO HAVE:       (ASCII/RTF Format)                              *
*Political Incorrectness:                                           *