From: cjo@ukc.ac.uk (C.J.Ojeda)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Protagonists
Date: 21 Aug 92 18:46:35 GMT
Reply-To: cjo@ukc.ac.uk (Cesar? )
Organization: Nepotism and Sons.


Pain seared through all his body, photo-flash quick, atomic explosion white
hot, but at the same time as endless as a summer Friday afternoon class. He
ran down the emergency stairs and out through the fire exit into the grey
August rain, struggling to keep hold of his objective as his mind thrashed
about seeking a refuge from the torment. Down the short alley and left onto
the main road. Pedestrians moved out of his way as he careered mindlessly
along the pavement. Some got out of his way simply because doing so was an
automatic response, not really noticeing him, others recoiled from him in
horror and fear. 
 He paid no attention to these people, all he could sense was the pain and
on a less important level the sound of his heart and the ragged gasping of
each breath. But even as he ran he sensed it was too late. The pain started
to diminish and he was weakening. In a few more steps all his strength had
drained away, incapable of even standing he fell. As a crowd of the curious
and horrified onlookers gathered he died.




"What happened to him doctor?"

"It's not a 'him' Steve except in the loosest possible sense of the word.
Observe the lack of detail in the body."

"What do you mean? It appears to be a nearly normal body. What I meant was
how did his eyes grow to such large proprtions. Could it be some form of 
mutation?"

"NORMAL! Steve if you wish to be a half-way decent pathologist you must pay
attention to all, even the tiniest, details. Look. No body hair, except on
his head where we have a mop of blond hair which looks like it spent five 
hours in a hairdressers. The only blemish on his skin is that scar there
just on his chin. No moles, pimples, NO PORES STEVEN! Smooth, no wrinkles
or creases, no fingerprints. He looks like he's been shrink wrapped. The 
only fine detail to be found is on his face, forget the eyes for the moment.
What does this indicate?"

"Umm. Well... The lack of ...no...the scar and the hair indicate a ...no... "

"Yes well, since we are busy today I don't think we can afford to wait while 
you revolutionize medical techniques so I will just slice him open."

"Doctor! There's nothing there!"

"As I expected. Ah look, about two pounds of jelly in the lower abdominal
region. Well Steve, do you finally realise what we have here?"

"Yes sir. It's a Protagonist sir."

"Well done. We get lots of them at this time of the year due to the literary
conferences. Remember, the signs are pretty easy to spot: lack of definiton
and detail in the torso and legs. The hero types are usually blond and what
generally passes for good looking. No internal organs is always a sure sign.
Bit of a dead giveaway eh Steve! Heh heh."

Steve winced inwardly at his tutor's bad sense of humour but quickly forgot
about him as he wondered at the body on the table. 'So this was a Protagonist'
They were created by authors who stopped writing a story without completing
it. They were short lived and never caused any harm unless they got hold of 
their creator. These days most writers based their books in distant cities
or even abroard, just in case. After all writers block can strike at any 
time. This explained the eyes, the unfinished book was probably half way
through a dramatic or scary scene.




The janitor picked up the shovel, using it to unlatch the furnace door and
push it aside. He picked up the black bin-liner and threw it into the fire.
The plastic seemed to melt onto the outlines of a large man who'd had his
hands and feet tied together before it flashed into flame and the janitor
pushed closed the door.




Cesar.
(Apologies to Stephen King. Didn't realise till I'd finished.)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre