From: tjw@vms.cis.pitt.edu
Newsgroups: alt.config,alt.folklore.urban
Subject: Re: Proposal: alt.answers
Summary: Posta while you can, monkeyboy -- L. J. Worphin
Keywords: :-)
Date: 11 Jan 93 17:42:07 GMT
Reply-To: tjw+@Pitt.edu
Followup-To: alt.config,alt.folklore.urban
Organization: University of Pittsburgh

In article <JIK.93Jan9191030@pit-manager.mit.edu>, jik@athena.mit.edu (Jonathan I. Kamens) writes:

> (Note the Newsgroups line, despite Terry setting his Followup-To line
> to "Your Mother."  Very amusing, Terry.)

You're quite welcome.  I did it just for you!  I notice you set the followup
up line (to "poster") again and didn't mention it (again).  Tsk, tsk!  You
bad boy!

> In article <1591@blue.cis.pitt.edu> tjw@vms.cis.pitt.edu writes:

>>Well, he did get voted "the least likely to get the joke" by the readers of
>>AFU when he objected to the content of the AFU FAQ (or perhaps because Peter
>>wanted to call the archive "jik-dick").  There's an "other" for you.

> More accurately, the maintainer of the alt.folklore.urban FAQ
> submitted it to news.answers, I rejected it because it did not conform
> to the guidelines, he resubmitted it with an archive name of
> "jik-dick," and then he started insulting me in alt.folklore.urban
> (and, for that matter, in the FAQ).

> If I am going to be granted the title "the least likely to get the
> joke" by some twits in alt.folklore.urban because I take my job as the
> moderator of news.answers seriously, so be it.  For some reason, I do
> not feel that my sense of humor is threatened by these people.

No no my boy ya got it all wrong!  You didn't get the title because you
take your job SERIOUSLY.  No not at all.  You got it because you take your
"job" *FAR TOO SERIOUSLY*.

If you handn't gone overboard in AFU, we all would have said "Sheesh, Peter's
at it again!".  We all would have taken your side in this.  We would have
offered you our most sincere apologies and chastised Peter for posting outside
of AFU, where we've come to know, tolerate and occasionally admire his
postings.

Let's face it, you come to EXPECT a prank from the author of:

  "The Official Handbook of Practical Jokes", -          Peter Vanderlinden
      publ Signet, $3.50, ISBN 0-451-15873-3
      
                and
                
  "The Second Official Handbook of Practical Jokes"  -   Peter Vanderlinden
      publ Signet, $3.50, ISBN 0-451-16924-7 illustrated (Lord help us)
       
(Please buy these books -- don't go to the LIBRARY and read them for FREE.
 Peter needs the money.  Thank you).


I mean, Peter's an author.  He's in print.  He's no USENET author-wannbe.
The MAN's an AUTHORITY on practical jokes.  (He must be -- he couldn't print
it if it wasn't TRUE).  So whadda expect he's gonna do?  It's how he makes his
living?!?  It's his BREAD and BUTTER, fer cryin' out loud.  It's his
LIVELYHOOD!  He's the Big Cheese of Practical Jokes.  The Bossman.  The
Supervisor!  The Head Honcho!  MR BIG.  The Elvis of Jokes.  Nuff Said?


If you would have called him a "ass" or a "naughty boy" or even posted a
"You sir, are not a gentelman!"  we all would have said:

                "Oh but of course!"
        
             or perhaps

                "Hear hear!"

             or maybe even

                "D*mn Skippy!  That's tellin' 'im, Gov'ner!"
                

But NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!  You gotta flame'im in AFU.  EXACTLY what Peter
wanted you to do!  You fell for it.  There was much back slapping and
nudge-nudge-wink-winking because of you!!! (Sort of like what's happening NOW
with your reply to my posting.  The followup-up to "your mother" was a hint
my dear fellow, what!)


You sir, made a g*dd*mn martyr of him.  You elevated him to SAINTHOOD!
Now we must ALL suffer the exploding cigars he sends out whenever he has a
child.  We must all LOOK THE OTHER WAY when he ties tin cans to kittens' tails!

                        AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!!!!

I, for one, am tired of having to kiss Saint Peter's AFU secret decoder ring!
       

> I would have accepted the alt.folklore.urban FAQ in news.answers if it
> had been submitted in a correct format with a valid (i.e., relevant to
> the topic of the FAQ) archive name.  I will still accept it if those
> conditions are met.  Neither of them have anything to do with the
> content of the posting (as opposed to the form of its headers, which
> is all that the news.answers guidelines restrict, and even that, to a
> very small degree).

"Correct".  "Valid".  "Relevant".  And earlier, "Guidelines".  What I posted
in jest before, I say in ernest now:  "You sir, are a USENETTer"!  If we
suffer this alt.answers to be created, we most surely are relinquishing the
FRONTIER to SHEEP HEARDERS!  They'll soon have every newsgroup fenced into
it's own little area, nice and neat and tidy!  We'll all have to wear ties
and skirts and work for IBM!!!   BLEAH!!!!

AFU doesn't *WANT* to be in your news.answers list!  It want's to roam FREE!

"You can't have it Mr Kamens!  Not now!  Not ever!" is the rallying cry
heard from node to node on the ALTNET!  "Keep AFU's FAQ out of news.answers!"


> I have archives of the whole alt.folklore.urban FAQ episode, and would
> be glad to provide them to anyone who would like to see what really
> occurred.  

SHEESH!  This guy *archives* FLAMES WARS!  Even PERRY MASON couldn't win the
day for you if I was Mr. Burger!

> I do not have archives of the various postings in
> alt.folklore.urban making fun of me after I rejected the FAQ, because
> I saw (and continue to see) no reason to give any credence to them
> whatsoever.

And that's too bad.  They really were the best ones.

> 
> I have posted in response to Terry's message because he is making an
> accusation different from Jef's.  Now that I have responded, I will
> say no more about this topic either.  I just don't think it's
> necessary.  Terry, if you want to be juvenile and insult me some more
> in alt.config and alt.folklore.urban, feel free -- I'm not going to
> stand in your way.

NAAAA.  You've done such a superior job yourself.  I was kidding before.  I
really did not care whether one creates an "answers" group or not.  Groups
like that are for control-weenies who need to be spoon fed their "correct
answers" by the "guidelines" and "Straw Polls".

But after seeing that you can't take ANY ribbing, I have to wonder if maybe
I wasn't on-the-mark afterall.

Have an alkaseltzer, Jonathan.  It's ONLY alt, afterall!

Terry "FURRFU!" Wood
Newsgroups: alt.config,rec.humor.d