Newsgroups: rec.org.mensa
Date: Wed, 26 Aug 1992 00:40:42 -0400 
From: "Stephen P. Marting" <sm6h+@andrew.cmu.edu>
Subject: Re: The nerd stereotype
Distribution: world

Excerpts from rec.org.mensa: 24-Aug-92 Re: The nerd stereotype by "Steve
J. Quest"@iowegia.uucp 
>         I myself am a nerd, and understand quite well the physical 
> similarities between the geeks and the nerds.  I also understand 
> the quite common social ineptitudes of both groups.  The major 
> separation between the two groups are as follows:

They're mostly used interchangeably, especially when you hit college
(excuse me for ass-u-me-ing [sp :P], but you're writing from a bbs...)
and have to deal with slang from all over the nation, and possibly
beyond.  Use whatever you want, but don't be surprised when no one else
does. 

>         A nerd can be found eating pizza, pop, and candy in front 
> of a computer screen.

Guess I'm a nerd then.  Hey, you try those 12-hour debugging CS-211
sessions without nourishment.  Plenty of non-nerds (and non-geeks as
well) do this.

>         A geek can be found eating pizza, pop, and candy in front 
> of Star Trek on TV.

Oh, I suppose I can't be a geek.  I don't really care for ST.

>         A nerd reads scientific journals, magazines and etc.

Guess I'm a nerd.

>         A geek reads comic books, sci-fi novels and etc.

Oh, wait, maybe I *can* be a geek after all...

>         a nerd is incapable of interpersonal relationships.
>         So is a geek.

Ah, well, THAT clinches it.  I'm neither.  Even though I'm currently
uninvolved, I have lots of close friendships on both sides of the fence,
and have had several happy relationships.

>         Flame away................sq

Ah, no.  I _may_, however, ask you to LIGHTEN UP A BIT.  If you, in your
own words, are "trying to reform," that could very well be the first
step.  Once you've laughed at yourself, it's hard to care about random
others laughing at you.  In fact, it becomes rather simple to look them
in the face, say, "yeah, whatever," and walk away.

Oh, yes, there IS a reason I'm posting this.  Bear with me, I like to ramble.

I'll call you a geek for now, 'cause I personally prefer that word. 
You've said you are a geek.  Get ready for this - you almost ALWAYS will
be.  Most likely until you're dead.  Now hold on to this thought - it
doesn't matter.  Not a bit.  I've been there - voted most intelligent in
a class of 500+ (though I must concede I should be second to the female
who also got the award, and possibly third after another), and didn't
have a single date (but manymany strikeouts) for a good while in my
school career.  In my sophomore HS year, I found a geekette, and that
lasted ~7 months.  Was way cool until the really bad ending.  Another
short one that year.  Then, senior year, somehow, a BABE.  Lasted almost
the whole year.  Was GREAT.  I _still_ don't know how or why.  But I
somehow find myself... not caring. :)

I'm still a geek.  I have a social life that's the same as anyone else's
- I'm in a waycool fraternity here, have the respect of my brothers and
all my other friends, and have no major problems with relationships
(barring the natural scarcity of women here), and I'm still a geek. 
Yay.  Big deal.

You're a geek.  You probably won't change that.  So as long as you go
around saying geeks are incapable of relationships, you most likely
won't have one.  Stop it.  Lighten up.  Go have fun.  If that means
hacking, do so.  Just do what you know you need to do - work on your own
maturing.  You will soon, if you can't ALREADY, be able to handle
relationships just fine.  And soon enough, one will come by.  Don't move
too soon, but don't let it slip by.  You have many years ahead of you,
you will learn the timing.  You'll learn what you need the SAME WAY THE
COOL PEOPLE DO - trial and error.  And they make JUST AS MANY errors as
you.

So after lightening up, get some perspective.  If things look really
bad, ask why, and DON'T LIE TO YOURSELF.  Pretty soon, you'll understand
that things aren't nearly as bad as you were making them.  From that
point, things piece themselves together quite well with minimal help
from you.

Or maybe not.  But hell, worked for me.

--
Spam is:               | This statement needs no qualifiers.
Steve Marting          | Most people never call me this.
spam+@cmu.edu          | A cute address that wastes computing resources.
sm6h+@andrew.cmu.edu   | My main address.
ap.2879@cupid.sai.com  | Mail to here is *anonymously* forwarded to me.