From: lmulcahy@nyx.cs.du.edu (Larry Mulcahy)
Subject: Fat Tears Streaming from those Big Brown Puppy-Dog Eyes
Followup-To: alt.ensign.wesley.die.die.die
Summary: Terrible Fates for Ensign Wesley
Organization: Nyx, Public Access Unix @ U. of Denver Math/CS dept.
Date: Thu, 5 Nov 92 19:25:29 GMT

ST:TNG plots I would like to see:

One of those hot babes with the tight fitting uniforms who work in
engineering catches Wesley's eye as he is performing a delicate
adjustment on the warp drive.  Oops!  The wildly oscillating warp field
scrambles his central nervous system.

For a fraternity initiation at Starfleet Academy, Wesley has to run the
length of a Borg ship naked.  The Borg are faster, he gets assimilated.

Wesley catches the same disease that almost killed Ryker.  Using the
treatment that was successful for Ryker, Bev and Troi strap him into the
apparatus and begin manipulating the brain probes to make him relive all
the most unpleasant experiences of his life.  This procedure drives the
organism away, but they can't snap him out of it...

Wesley joins Worf in the holodeck for calisthenics, but Worf fails to
snap out of his berserker frenzy after the simulated monsters have been
offed and guts him.

The Enterprise return to the planet from the "Skin of Evil" episode, and
Data and Wesley beam down to investigate.  The evil black ooze trades
Data Tasha Yar for Wesley.

Romulan spies frame Wesley; he is executed by the Federation as a
traitor.

Wesley is reunited with the shape-changing girl from the "Dauphin"
episode.  During her special time of the month she flies into a rage.
She transforms into a monstrous acid-dripping creature and dismembers
him with her tentacles.

Those insect-like parasites that burrow under the skin to the spinal
column and take control of their human hosts return.  Wesley notices
some of the Enterprise crew are acting funny.  He hacks into the
computer files and finds some log entries about the parasites.  He
learns how to spot the parasites by the breathing tube which they leave
hanging out the back of the neck.  Meanwhile, a cloak of secrecy has
descended over sick bay.  Pickard, Ryker, Troi, Geordi, Guinan and Worf
all visit sick bay in the dead of night and afterwards the tubes can be
seen sticking out the back of their necks.  Dr. Crusher herself also has
one.  What Wesley doesn't know is that all the important members of the
crew are getting false breathing tubes installed to fool the parasites.
Wesley waits until everyone is together on the bridge.  With tears
streaming from his big brown puppy-dog eyes, he whips out his phaser set
to "kill" and blows them all away, including his mother.

The gang in Engineering concocts an elaborate prank.  The night before
Wesley is supposed to transfer from the Enterprise to Starfleet Academy,
they get him drunk then move him while he is passed out from his
quarters to the holodeck.  Barkely programs the holodeck so the next
day, Wesley seems to wake up in his quarters, say his goodbyes, go to
the transporter room, beam down and begin his new life as a cadet at
Starfleet Academy.  Anyone on board ship who asks is told he slipped
down during the night to avoid tearjerking sentimental goodbye scenes.
To casual observers, the holodeck appears to be out of order.  As the
Enterprise proceeds along to its next mission, the Engineering crew
outdo each other in the bizarre and humiliating scenarios they arrange
to occur in Wesley's new "life".  Soon, all realize that if the secret
ever gets out, the careers of everyone involved will be ruined.  They
take elaborate precautions, paneling over the holodeck door and erasing
all records of its presence from the computer.  Guilt and fear of
discovery make the conspirators hostile and paranoid, and they take it
out on Wesley, piling on more and more hellish detail in the holodeck
simulation, leading to still more guilt and fear in a vicious circle
such that, for Wesley, each day is worse than the day before.  The years
slip by...
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