HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: bhoughto@hopi.intel.com (Blair P. Houghton)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: MORE OR LESS?
Date: 28 Mar 92 18:49:19 GMT
Organization: Intel Corp, Chandler, AZ

In article <10808@borg.cs.unc.edu> state@sargent.cs.unc.edu (Andrei State) writes:
>oispeggy@ubvmsc.cc.buffalo.edu (Peggy Brown) writes
>about circumcision in alt.sex.wizards:
>| Also, I heard that an uncircumcized penis (UP) has up to an EXTRA INCH in 
>| length.  Most men I know would want that extra inch.

But it usually takes the form of Just More Scrotal Tissue (which
was the name of a garage band in my hometown of Ichabod, Mo.).

I'd do anything to reduce scrotal tissue.

>| To continue ranting, I think circumcision is also *stupid*.  Its supposed to 
>| be cleaner.  Well, first of all, males are not prone to bladder infections 
>| anyway, the way females are, due to having that long urethra that is 
>| relatively far removed from bacteria, so circumcision really doesn't prevent 
>| the male from getting an illness - he wouldn't get a bladder infection anyway.

Dr. Peggy's never had a Non-Specific Urethritis.

Dr. Peggy doesn't know what smegma is.

Dr. Peggy is lucky.

>So now I want to know: do circumcised penises
>have a flat tip (sort of like a mesa top)?
>I'm uncircumcised and mine ends with a half-sphere.

Mine looks like either Darth Vader's helmet, or Gary
Sandy's hair.  It's very beatiful, and has no need of
Raised Pleasure Ribs.

				--Blair
				  "Andy Gibb's hair, too."
From: jchrist@GeoWare.COM (Jesus Christ)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Happy Easter!
Date: Mon, 13 Apr 92 22:01:34 EDT
Organization: GeoWare Software Design, Toronto ON

Hello all.

Since Easter is coming up, I'd thought I'd drop a line to all my
faithful readers in t.b and wish them a safe and happy holiday season.
Remember that this is an occasion for family-gatherings and wholesome
good times.

Avail yourself to generous helpings of mom's ever-so-sweet apple pie.
Gorge thy bloated carcass on massive portions of roast pig.
Verily (and forsooth), become as Buddha (that fat bastard), and dine on
succulent slices of tender, perfectly-cooked young Asian children.

Finally, in closing, love thy neighbor as thyself and look not to
harshly on the visage of Jeff Dahmer (he who casts the first stone, you
know).

JC
-- excuse the temporary address ... am having trouble registering my
domain ... no-one willing to act as my MX forwarder ...

   +-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+
   |            Jesus Christ       -> jchrist@GeoWare.COM <-           |
   +-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+
From: dic5340@hertz.njit.edu (David Charlap)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,alt.swedish.chef.bork.bork.bork
Subject: Re: swedish chef
Date: 16 Apr 92 12:27:33 GMT
Distribution: na,local
Organization: New Jersey Institute of Technology, Newark, N.J.

In article <1992Apr16.032839.4865@murdoch.acc.Virginia.EDU> ejh2p@faraday.clas.Virginia.EDU (TTHHWWAACCKK!!!) writes:
>I agree, as long as OBborks are included.
>
>bork bork bork

Heerde meer feerde, meenson de-skeedle-do,  yee-dor mee-dor de-do
BORK BORK BORK (toss pans over head...)



-- 
David Charlap                   Q:"Where do these stairs go?"
dic5340@hertz.njit.edu          A:"They go up"
----------------------------
Hi! I am a .signature virus. Copy me into your .signature to join in!
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: mjs@kepler.unh.edu (Speaker to Robots)
Subject: A Clue ("Was:  Re: Victorian Negligees")
Summary: Pick yer window, mate!
Keywords: just do it
Organization: ScreechHog Utilities, Inc.
Date: Wed, 8 Apr 1992 13:41:07 GMT

In article <7yZViB2w164w@batpad.lgb.CA.US> amnio@batpad.lgb.CA.US (Amniocentesi
s) writes:
>mjs@kepler.unh.edu (Speaker to Robots) writes:

>> Defenestrated for no real purpose.

>That's the second time someone has mentioned "defenestration" in the
>space of an hour.

Ya think someone's, ah . . ., tryin' ta _tell_ you somethin'?

>Anyway...

>the dot end

Minimalist bungee jumping--the newest t.b. craze!


-- 
/*------------------------------------.------------------------------------*\
|                 Nemo                |                omeN                 |
|                                     |                                     |
\*_mjs@kepler.unh.edu_________________|_________________ude.hnu.relpek@sjm_*/
From: eerke@cs.kun.nl (Eerke Boiten)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Non sequitur (Re: life in eitherwayland)
Keywords: in case it wasn't clear yet
Date: 10 Apr 92 12:38:51 GMT
Organization: University of Nijmegen, The Netherlands

In article <1992Apr9.074930.850@desire.wright.edu> dhoward@desire.wright.edu (sparky-desire) writes:
>don't get me wrong.  i got nuthin against homosexuals.
>but eerke here, can fuck off.
--
Eerke
one latin word per annum
From: dac@prolix.pub.uu.oz.au (Andrew Clayton)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Short, Shameful Confession
Date: Thu, 16 Apr 92 11:59:45 GMT
Reply-To: munnari!labtam!eyrie!prolix!dac
FollowUp-To: talk.bizarre
Keywords: 
Organization: More like Dis~, really.

In article <im.ok.youre.ok@hostname>, Anal Widget writes:

> I archive all of my own postings.

Things that make me go *PLONK* ...
From: fmayhar@mpd.tandem.com (Frank Mayhar)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: CHUN LI'S ->
Keywords: zzz
Date: 13 Apr 92 03:50:26 GMT
Reply-To: fmayhar@altair.UUCP (Frank Mayhar)
Distribution: world,local
Organization: None to speak of.

In article <12APR92194651@smaug.hacks.arizona.edu> guest@tiamat.hacks.arizona.edu writes:
>In article <I.AM.THE.GREATEST@hostname>, whoami@hostname (ALL YOU GET!!!!  SONIC BOOOOOM!!1! YAP!!!YAP!!!YAP!!!!) writes...
>[Bunch of usless stuff deleted]
>>I AM THE BEST STRET FIGHHTER IN THE WORLD!!1!! I HAV NEVER BEEN
>>BETEN!!!!! CHALLENGE ME AND I WILL DESTROY YOU!!!1!1!!!11
>Best Street Fighter? Are you sure about that? I sure there are some people out
>there who might have second ideas about that.  And they don't use no special 
>moves, they'll just pick you up and drop you in front of some semi moving 
>along at 80mph, or maybe just twist your neck into a pretzel :)

No no no no no no no!

_Stret_ fighter.


It's a Zen thing.
-- 
Frank Mayhar  fmayhar@mpd.tandem.com
              Tandem Computers, Inc.  Micro Products Division
              14231 Tandem Blvd., Austin, TX  78728    Phone:  (512) 244-8969
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: richh@tigger.jvnc.net (RICHH)
Subject: Re: STORY - A Story of Sexual Firsts - Part 3
Originator: richh@tigger.jvnc.net
Organization: JvNCnet
Date: Mon, 6 Apr 1992 20:46:36 GMT

br631@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (Jon Albert Van) writes:

>     After a few moments of the slipping and sliding embrace, I backed
>away and grabbed the soap.  I quickly unwrapped it and started to wash

Niw you know I hate to nitpick, but you QUICKLY UNWRAPPED(??) the
soap??  I'm just curious.  Which soap would *that* be?

RICHH
--I'm serious.  I would love to find a soap I didn't have to use a
--Shopsmith(tm) to open.
From: lordSnooty@cup.portal.com (Andrew - Palfreyman)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: An idea whose time has come
Date: Sat, 11 Apr 92 15:44:18 PDT
Organization: The Portal System (TM)
  <1992Apr7.111615.6100@doug.cae.wisc.edu>
  <1992Apr7.174926.27791@iWarp.intel.com>
  <1992Apr7.225712.10142@luga.latrobe.edu.au>
  <1992Apr8.181524.11746@awdprime.austin.ibm.com>

Craig Becker:
: I've read that victorian versions of the ever-popular _How To Pick
: Up Women_ books advised men to stuff a handkerchief down their crotch
: and wear it for a week or so. Then, when alone with a woman, one was
: supposed to somehow get her to breath through it, end result being
: that she would (supposedly) get Real Turned On.

generations of brits from the rural 18th century had Barn Dances once
in a while to relieve the farm-fever monotony. a lad would dance with
a balled hanky stuffed up in his armpit; at the end of the evening,
proferring said hanky was supposed to make the last dance in the hay outside.

another more recent technique, perhaps called the "wheatride", involves
slowly driving the lass of your choice (tractor, horse or combine
harvester; mount according to taste) through a large field of waving wheat.
the sussuration and sensuous swaying of the cereal is said to guarantee a
real "hayride".

kansassians have no doubt refined this technique from their ancient origins.
followups to alt.midwest.i'm.bored.and.horny.again
 --------------------------------------------------------------------------
| lord snooty @the giant | the corrn's ahff cut, an' zo be we.             |
| poisoned electric head |              andrew palfreyman@cup.portal.com   |
 --------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: bhoughto@hopi.intel.com (Blair P. Houghton)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: a killfile meditation
Date: 12 Apr 92 02:44:50 GMT
Organization: Intel Corp, Chandler, AZ

In article <1992Apr1.191120.22094@shinobu.sgi.com> cj@eno.corp.sgi.com (C J Silverio) writes:
>My killfile is huge.

How about your SAT scores?

				--Blair
				  "Itchin' fer a confliction."
From: chrisl@sancho.sybase.com (Xian The Drive)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: tax-time joy
Date: 16 Apr 92 16:27:24 GMT
Reply-To: chrisl@sancho.sybase.com (Xian The Drive)

In article <1992Apr13.233751.24198@uwm.edu>, terri@csd4.csd.uwm.edu (St Theresa of the Net) writes:

|> Oh, but ceej, just think.

siege.


+------------+ with The Calling Voice, at the Blackthorn Tavern
|    xian    |        THIS FRIDAY April 17 at  9:30
| ----<--<@  |   On Irving at 9th in Beautiful Sam Francisco
+------------+ Where You Are King and the Sexy Fun Never Stops.
(filed  in january)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: dschmidt@athena.mit.edu (Dan Schmidt)
Subject: Re: Instant karma's gonna get ya
Organization: the act or process of organizing or of being organized
Date: Thu, 9 Apr 1992 19:41:01 GMT

waldbyjf@nextwork.rose-hulman.edu says:
| I was certain that it was a solo, and at one time must have known it
| was Lennon, but things get warped around in my head, and bungled.  My
| roommate seemed to be sure it was the Beatles, and although I knew he
| was wrong I knew my mind could be bungled, and had to get an outside
| opinion.  So, my friend, redirect your tongue to him.  You can mail
| him a letter if you want, although you probably don't know his
| address.  By the way, not knowing one song doesn't condemn a person
| to lifelessness.  I'll bet if you ask as many people (with a fair
| cross-section) as you want age 20 and below, and under 25% of them
| would have known the artist in this case.  By the way, I'll bet you I
| can name a lot of songs that you can't. For example:
| 
| Who sings "To Walk the Night" ? - brief clip:
| 
| "To walk the night
| Unearthly night
| World without end
| And everything else must die "  (not necessarily in that order)
| 
| What song is this, and who is the author:
| 
| "Though I'm dressed in rags, I'll wear sable some day"
| 
| What song is this, and who is the author:
| 
| "Clearly I remember picking on the boy, seemed a harmless little fuck."
| "Bit the recess lady's breast, how could I forget?"
| --
| 
| If you can't figure out all of these, you are a crawling slimy piece
| of worm-shit.  Just kill yourself while you can.
| -- Eat me, I'm a cream-filled Eclair

I take it back.  He does need to get a life.
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: lstewart@watserv1.waterloo.edu (L. Stewart -- IS      Office 1058)
Subject: Linda Ronstadt
Keywords: bark, like, a, dog
Organization: University of Waterloo
Date: Tue, 14 Apr 1992 18:36:29 GMT

 My neighbour has a Linda Ronstadt shrine in his backyard
 and he woke me up at 3:30 this morning with a mess of 
 barking so I look out the window and he's climbing his wife
 like a german shepherd she's got on a pair of roller skates
 and red satin short-shorts around her ankles. Nothing like
 a low light scope and a couple rounds of rock salt to 
 interuptus a coitus.






 Fuck you Ted Turner.
From: state@sargent.cs.unc.edu (Andrei State)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: ideal talk.bizarre newsreader/killfile
Date: 15 Apr 92 16:14:14 GMT
Organization: University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill

RICHH writes:
>
> What have YOU ever done for THIS PLACE
> besides St. Terri, which is neither ORIGINAL nor all that much of a 
> CHALLENGE??!!

What kind of *challenge* are we talking here Rich3 ?


Andrei
From: ra@asuvax.eas.asu.edu (Starcap'n Ra)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: No Mr Bond, I expect you to die
Date: 13 Apr 92 18:43:30 GMT
Organization: t.b

gooley@netcom.com (Markian Gooley) writes:
> HELLO.  WELL, I WAS AT THIS XMAS PARTY NOT LAST XMAS BUT THE ONE BEFORE AND 
> I GOT DRUNK AND THEY HAD A BUNCH OF CHOCLATE SANTACLAUSES AND I KEPT STABBING
> THEM WITH KITCHEN KNIVES AND SAYING, NO, MR. CLAUS, I EXPECT YOU TO DIE!"
> BUT NOBODY EVEN TOOK NOTICE OF ME.
> 
> FUCKING TYPICAL.

     Several days later, I am still struck
by the brilliance of this post.  Surely it
represents the quintessence of the Goolean
genre.

--Starcap'n Ra       {ames,gatech,husc6,rutgers}!ncar!noao!asuvax!kennedy
                        {allegra,decvax,ihnp4,oddjob}--^
                                          ^---------------The Wrong Choice
                             internet: kennedy@asuvax.asu.edu
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: kschnitz@encore.com (Kevin Schnitzius)
Subject: how to mail
Keywords: not
Organization: Encore Computer Corporation
Date: Tue, 14 Apr 1992 21:17:43 GMT

So, the other day, my wife says "Omigod, I forgot to mail the insurance
check.  Take this down to the post office and mail it ceritified."  At
the post office, the line is out of the lobby and down the sidewalk.  I 
grab the certified sticker and try to fill it out.  I have no pen.  No
one around has a pen.  Fuck.  I drive to a gas-station-slash-convience-
store to buy a pen.  They don't sell pens.  How convenient.  Well, the 
line is still long so I figure I go to another post office nearer to work 
so I can grab a pen at work.  So, I fill out the certified sticker and 
as I am about to turn down the road to the post office, I see the Ft 
Lauderdale Bomb Squad drive by.  No way, I am thinking, not the post 
office.  Sure enough, they had the area cordoned off with about fifty 
police cars with the rollers going.

Did I mention that it is hot is South Florida and I have no A/C in
my car?

I hate my wife sometimes.
--
Kevin Schnitzius
kschnitzius@encore.com
From: dpl@aber.ac.uk (David Philip Langstaff)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: ON TAMIL NADU CM & TALK OF TERRORISM ON THE NET
Keywords: RAPE, MURDER, ARABS, CANIBALISM
Date: 8 Apr 92 11:16:36 GMT
Organization: University of Wales, Aberystwyth

In article <ku1ob5INNb6f@koh-sun12.usc.edu> nagabhus@koh-sun12.usc.edu (Vasuki N) writes:
> [...shout, rant, blather...]
>
>It is a open secret
>that LTTE raises money THROUGH SELLING DRUGS TO WESTERN COUNTRIES, IMAGINE
>A HOMELAND FOUNDED BY DRUG MONEY.

I'm starting to warm to these people....

>PROPER DISCIPLINARY MEASURES will have to be enforced,

Now you're talking, thats the sort of stern approach that really appeals,
say, you don't have any leather gear do you ?


-- 
Dave Langstaff | Janet:dpl@uk.ac.aber.cs | Disclaimer: All my own work. 
Any views expressed are those of the author alone. | Phone:(0970)622838 
After-life, After-shave, don't hold with any of it, bleugh! - Sir Henry 
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: carasso@netcom.com (RDC)
Subject: Re: An idea whose time has come
Date: Wed, 08 Apr 92 00:35:49 GMT
Organization: PTA BOARD COUNCIL OF THE GREATER UNITED STATES
Distribution: world 

IN TALK.BIZARRE,ALT.TASTELESS 
saunders@luther.che.wisc.edu (Brian E. Saunders) said:
)Actually, I've found that most women's crotches smell similar to my
)underarm.  And no, I don't turn myself on my sniffing my underarm! [the
)last sentence was to avoid a certain response]

wms@iwarp.intel.com (William Shubert) writes:
)I knew one girl whose crotch smelled exactly like band-aids...you know,
)kinda plasticky and sterilized.  It was real weird and a little bit
)nauseating.  And yes, I have since tried turning myself on by sniffing
)band-aids, but it doesn't work.



COMPLETE THIS SENTENCE:

I KNEW A GIRL WHOSE CROTCH SMELLED_________________________________________.


carasso "the new party game sweeping the nation"
-- 
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,soc.culture.japan
From: gooley@netcom.com (Markian Gooley)
Subject: Re: CATFISH
Date: Tue, 07 Apr 92 11:18:25 GMT
Organization: Netcom - Online Communication Services  (408 241-9760 guest) 

In article <7npjph-.carasso@netcom.com> carasso@netcom.com (RDC) writes:
>
>Tokyo, Japan, researchers have ended a 16-year study of tanks of
>catfish with no clear conclusion on whether their behavior can help
>predict earthquakes.

Yes, but at least catfish are an aphrodesiac.
Now they can do research on that to confirm it.

Mark., not that I have found them so from personal experience
gooley@netcom.com
From: nj@magnolia.Berkeley.EDU (Narciso Jaramillo)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Interlude 1: morphophonological thought for the day
Date: 6 Apr 92 14:25:43 GMT
Article-I.D.: magnolia.NJ.92Apr6092543
Organization: Postcarcinogenic Bliss, Inc.
NNTP-Posting-Host: magnolia.berkeley.edu
X-Confession: cheated; used /usr/dict/words


What if "geo" were always pronounced as in "geoduck"?

Repeat after me:

	geography
	geology
	geometry
	geodesic dome
	Geo Metro
	George

Better yet:

	sturgeon
	bourgeois
	Peugeot
	courageous
	bludgeon
	gorgeous
	changeover
	outrageous

and of course

	flageolet
From: cj@eno.corp.sgi.com (C J Silverio)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: tax-time joy
Date: 15 Apr 92 15:41:21 GMT
Reply-To: cj@eno.corp.sgi.com (C J Silverio)
Organization: SGI TechPubs

In article <1992Apr13.233751.24198@uwm.edu>, St Theresa of the Net writes:
|This year, you're actually paying less taxes.
|That's right.
|You'll still be liable for the same amount, but you won't be netting shit
|come next april.

Ain't it the troof.  Bush is betting that the American 
public is so stupid that they'll never figure this one 
out, and thank him for cutting taxes.

Tragically, he'll probably win his bet.   
---
c j silverio
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: ldoering@engin.umich.edu (Laurence Doering)
Subject: Me and AjD: contrast and compare
Date: Mon, 06 Apr 92 17:27:47 EDT
Organization: Lemming's House O' Loud Mufflers

In article <1992Apr5.182922.12945@terminator.cc.umich.edu> ajd@itl.itd.umich.edu (AjD) writes:
> Went to the Hash Bash.
Wotta coincidence.  So did I.

> Was sober.  Hadda go to work later.
Sober too, but slightly strung out after seeing Jax, the Laughing Hyenas,
Country Bob and the Blood Farmers, and Monster Bait at the Heidelberg and
then staying up till 6am.

> Got a contact high anyhow.
I didn't, even though I hung around the area where the drummers were,
ostentatiously smoking cigarettes to confuse the cops.

> Didn't smell any dope smoking.
I did.

> Saw a 4 foot tall bong.
Wandered around sketching the punkettes until my hands got cold.

> Missed all the interesting stuff.
Wished I'd brought pastels so I could've captured that slyly bewitching
hint of green hair peeking out from under her leather cap.

> AjD
> only purchase was a bumper sticker that says "Bad Cop, No Donut."
Passed up a chance to buy a Ren and Stimpy "Happy Happy Joynt Joynt"
T-shirt.

ljd
From: bhoughto@hopi.intel.com (Blair P. Houghton)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: Poisoning my roommate's plants
Date: 13 Apr 92 02:06:09 GMT
Organization: Intel Corp, Chandler, AZ

In article <1992Apr9.075233.7289@news.Hawaii.Edu> rigler@galileo.ifa.hawaii.edu (Somme Mersault) writes:
>Don't use coffee, beer or coca cola.  I've been dumping these substances
>into the pots of our office plants for five years and it has only made
>them stronger...

Just for science' sake, ivy plants seem to thrive on nothing
more than tapwater and localized blithering.  We have an old
Diet Mountain Dew can in the office, here, that is home to
no less than forty linear feet of what began as a few diseased
leaves pruned from a long-dead potted vine.  During that time
three of us have bought and furnished houses or sport-utility
vehicles, or had kids or operations.

				--Blair
				  "And the plants shall rule the
				   earth and stuff the ballot boxes
				   in MTV phone polls for Metallica."
				   -Nostradamus, The Skateboard Years
From: john@csrnxt1.ae.utexas.edu (John R. Schutz)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Twenty words to describe George "Bucky" Bush
Date: 14 Apr 92 02:25:56 GMT
Organization: Those wacky, wacky fellas at UT's CSR

1.  vomitous
2.  tasty
3.  icky
4.  itchy
5.  perverse
6.  garlicky
7.  drippy
8.  phlegm-like
9.  spewey
10. hotpants
11. sugarmomma
12. vesicular
13. ratboy
14. taller-than-Dukakis
15. pretty-boy
16. whitey
17. lickworthy
18. fizzy
19. filling
20. pus-laden
21. sticky
22. pointy
23. nice 

							john

--
| John R. Schutz                     | Email&NeXTmail:                       |
| A learning NeXTie                  |		john@csrnxt1.ae.utexas.edu   |
| (512)328-0587                      | "We are all victims of dead men."     |
| 3009 Hatley Dr., Austin, TX  78746 |          -Charles Fuller              |
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: jreiser@scott.skidmore.edu (jason reiser)
Subject: Re: hey, i gotta idea.  this is killer.
Organization: Skidmore College, Saratoga Springs NY
Date: Thu, 16 Apr 1992 04:07:16 GMT

lab specimen j reiser replies...

oops, I f*cked up pretty good huh?

Sorry for flaming the wrong guy.
Apologies have been exchanged accordingly.

				- Jason.
From: al037@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (Dave Polewka)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: short, shameful confession
Date: 14 Apr 92 02:23:30 GMT
Article-I.D.: usenet.1992Apr14.022330.1566
Reply-To: al037@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (Dave Polewka)
Organization: Case Western Reserve University, Cleveland, OH (USA)


In a previous article, moore7004@iscsvax.uni.edu () says:

>I simply cannot stand this newsgroup.  
                             
you mean "newsfroup".

.
-- 
=======================
"Endeavor to persevere"
=======================
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
From: bjbisset@eos.ncsu.edu (BILLY JOE BISSETTE)
Subject: Re: It was ELVIS!!! (WAS: Time)
Organization: North Carolina State University
Date: Tue, 7 Apr 1992 16:29:23 GMT

>>>>Elvis is dead.
>>>Pelvis wrist head.
>>Elvish knish-head.
>Melvins Fist bled
Elvis is dead.

(I know, because my brother told me.  His neighbors are heartbroken.  They
bought a new dog, however, and named her Pricilla.)

-- 
----------bill the clueless, bjbisset@eos.ncsu.edu
Go, Go, Gadget Clue.  No, Gadget Clue, not Gadget Hammer!  Help Brain!
What do you mean, "The Swedish Chef got him."  Stop Gadget Hammer!
No, not Gadget Flame! Stop!  Stop!!

Xref: sparky talk.bizarre:10696 alt.angst:1244 rec.games.mud:4722 alt.slack:1385 alt.religion.kibology:1570
From: ra@asuvax.eas.asu.edu (Starcap'n Ra)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,alt.angst,rec.games.mud,alt.slack,alt.religion.kibology
Subject: Re: Xibo's Vacation (part one) [LONG]
Date: 10 Apr 92 01:40:16 GMT
Followup-To: alt.angst
Organization: t.b

xibo@fido.econ.arizona.edu (Mr. Coates) writes:
> I ordered some pizza from Pizza Hut, and got chewed out by the
> roommates for not getting real Chicago-style pizza.  Fuck 'em,
> I thought.  I wanted pizza, and I didn't want to risk having it
> be weird.  Pizza Hut is the same no matter what part of the country
> you're in.

     Oh Jesus H. Christ in a fucking Denny's,
Xibo.  You travel all the way to Chicago to
eat goddam Pizza Hut?

> and the best place anyone could think of to eat was Denny's,
> which was fine with me.

     That's it, you're outta here.

--Starcap'n Ra,      {ames,gatech,husc6,rutgers}!ncar!noao!asuvax!kennedy
   angst, I fucking     {allegra,decvax,ihnp4,oddjob}--^
   GUESS to hell                          ^---------------The Wrong Choice
                             internet: kennedy@asuvax.asu.edu
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre