From: jrs@netcom.com (John Switzer)
Subject: Summary Thu 8/13/92
Date: Fri, 14 Aug 92 15:22:50 GMT
Organization: Netcom - Online Communication Services  (408 241-9760 guest) 
Summary: Unofficial Summary for Thursday, August 14, 1992
Keywords: Unofficial Summary Rush Limbaugh

Unofficial Summary of the Rush Limbaugh Show

for Thursday, August 13, 1992

by John Switzer

NOTE: This is being posted to both alt.fan.rush-limbaugh and
alt.rush-limbaugh and thus you may see it twice if your sysadm
aliases the two newsgroups together. Since most sites don't
support both groups, this double-posting appears to be
unavoidable, however, if anyone has any ideas on how to avoid it,
please let me know. Thanks - jrs@netcom.com.

This unofficial summary is copyright (c) 1992 by John Switzer.
All Rights Reserved. Distribution of this unofficial summary to
other electronic forums and bulletin boards is highly encouraged.
Spelling and other corrections gratefully received.

Please read the standard disclaimer which was included with the
first summary for this month. In particular, please note that
this summary is not approved or sanctioned by Rush Limbaugh or
the EIB network, nor do I have any connection with them other as
a daily listener.

******************************************************************

August 13, 1992

MORNING UPDATE

Rush has shocking news - everyone is going to die! People are
lowering their cholesterol in the hopes of reducing their chances
of a heart attack and thus prolong their lives. However, a recent
medical study found that people with low cholesterol levels were
at greater disk from death due to stroke, cancer, liver and lung
disease, suicide, and even homicide.

Rush wonders what society is supposed to do - first it is told
that it has to give up all the foods it enjoys so that it will
have lower cholesterol, and thus be able to live longer lives,
albeit in misery. Now, though, society is told that low levels of
cholesterol can kill you, too.

The bottom line is that everyone is going to die, and thus it
makes sense that while people are alive they should enjoy life.
Rush therefore encourages his audience to have fun and live
naturally, and stop trying to act as if you can prevent death.
"And when you die," Rush adds, "see you later."

FIRST HOUR

Items

o       Kit Carson is in the EIB studios to announce that the
trustees of Honolulu University are conferring the honorary
degree of "Doctors of Letters" upon Rush Limbaugh to honor his
"advanced thinking." This is Rush's second honorary degree as
Rita from Detroit has already given him a "Degree of
Trickonology."

Rush wonders when he can go to Honolulu to receive the degree,
but Kit informs him that it's already been mailed to him. Rush is
somewhat disappointed about not being able to go to Hawaii, but
he is still deeply grateful for receiving this degree. Kit
wonders if he now needs to call Rush "Dr. Limbaugh," but Rush
says that he doesn't believe in such pretentiousness, although he
does remark "the Decade of Limbaugh continues - there's just no
way to stop this juggernaut."

o       In more great news, Rush's new book "The Way Things Ought
to Be" has come off the presses; however, the book will not be
widely available until September.

o       Rush is somewhat distracted for the nonce since he
notices that the woman who called him yesterday to talk about his
"crush" on Joan Lunden has called back.

o       Rush is troubled, though, at the way politics are
proceeding this year. Although he used to believe that "anything
goes" in politics, he is bothered by how the media is now
considering the quotes of a dead man in a book to be a valid news
source. Rich Bonds' recent remarks about Hillary Clinton also
trouble him. He doesn't know if he would do anything differently,
but he suspects that there are better ways to fight a campaign.

The Republican campaign seems to think that it must tell the
voters about the negative aspects of Clinton and his campaign
since the media is ignoring so much of the Clintons' past. But
when they tell the truth, Republicans are then attacked by the
Democrats for "negative campaigning." However, Rush thinks that a
person's character is important and it should be considered when
electing a President.

<<KTMS, showing that they are ever on the cutting edge, and
capable of making the hard decisions that will guarantee them a
growing market share, has decided to preempt Rush's show so as to
broadcast a Dodgers games, in spite of the incredibly bad season
that this pathetic team is having this year. They are not going
to air Rush's show later, evidently preferring their own
cracker-jack team of talk show hosts and commentators to the
highest rated talk show host in America today.

To make matters worse, the receptionist who answers KTMS's phone
is incredibly arrogant about this, implying in the tone of her
voice that anyone who disagrees with the program director's
decision is an idiot. This arrogance would bother me more if the
woman didn't demonstrate the level of her abilites by the fact
that when I called in twice this morning, she disconnected me
while trying to pick up the call.

This level of incompetence is common with KTMS employees (and
with their FM affiliate Y-97). I consider it a good day, for
example, when Y-97 manages to broadcast the Dr. Demento
syndicated show without doing anything stupid such as playing
commercials over a song or deciding to replay the first hour of
the show instead of proceeding on to the second hour. Perhaps if
they would bother to hire competent radio professionals, they
might be able to figure things out. Perhaps if I ever leave this
radio cultural wasteland of Santa Barbara, I might believe that
competent radio professionals exist. Sigh - a much dejected,
depressed summary writer.>>

<<P.S. KTMS is located at 1330 Cacique Street, P.O. Box 4458,
Santa Barbara, CA 93140. Send mail, or better yet, rabid small
animals.>>


-- 
John Switzer               | "My name is Hillary. It's a German
                           | name that means 'She whose bosoms
74076.1250@Compuserve.com  | defy gravity.'" -- from Top Secret,
jrs@netcom.com             | a vastly underpraised movie