From: shogan@binah.cc.brandeis.edu (Empress Sue)
Subject: Re: A hug request and a general growl at the world
Reply-To: shogan@binah.cc.brandeis.edu
Organization: Brandeis University
Date: Tue, 5 Jan 1993 02:05:46 GMT

seamus@ravel.udel.edu (James G Dilmore) writes:
>The damn editor just floated my article away.  Damn pico.
Oh...I'm so sorry. <HUG>  Before I was able to housebreak my editor, 
it often ate my mail and anything else it could reach.  It was a 
*very* hungry editor.

>O well.  In it I bitched about my break and about the myriad of 
>medical problems which struck my family.
<More HUGS>

>I also bitched about my mother who "came out" as quite the homophobic
>bigot.

>  [stuff about mother/infatuation-lust-admiration of a good friend 
>  deleted for space reasons]
>  More growling [with *good* reason]

>I am quite annoyed with being closetted.  I want to be out and sincere
>with the people who I meet and know.  I have a question for the bunch.
>Where does the balance lie between discretion and safety on one hand and
>sincerity and openness on the other?
Hell...it sounds to me like you have reason to growl.  I'm sorry about 
your mum's reaction.  That stinks!  I am working on that balance 
myself.  I have found, so far, that being out is trial and error.  I 
need to be out to a certain point to be comfortable with me.  
Therefore, I came out to my family and some friends.  I'm not at the 
point where I would feel comfortable coming out at work.  (I may be in 
the future, I may not.)  I have decided that coming out is something 
that should be liberating, not confining.  If it is not safe (and by 
that I mean physically, mentally, or emotionally) I will not come out.  
This doesn't mean that if I am too afraid, I won't come out.  Because, 
I was afraid when I came out to my family.  It just means that, if 
there is actual danger, I will reconsider.  I am still too new to the
whole concept.  I have not yet developed all of my thoughts regarding
my bisexuality yet.  I am not yet ready to "put it all on the line."

>Hugs to all exmuffins.
I'll take that hug, and give you back ten more big, warm, full-body hugs...
  
  O      O      O      O      O      O      O      O      O
<HuG>  <HuG>  <HuG>  <HuG>  <HuG>  <HuG>  <HuG>  <HuG>  <HuG>
 _M_    _M_    _M_    _M_    _M_    _M_    _M_    _M_    _M_

>I will get to posting as soon as I get out of this funk.
Actually, if you'd like to growl in e-mail...feel free.  (I love 
putting down expense reports to read my mail...)

>I noticed that we have a Pooh now.  and a Piglet too.  Very appropriate since
>I just read The Te of Piglet and may reread the Tao of Pooh.  Amusing books.
So do you recommend them?  I saw both at the bookstore...they looked 
interesting...

>[stuff deleted by mistake <sigh>]...amusing.  I feel like Eeyore to day.
>But hopefully I will return to my normal old TIgger self.  Tired grin
>verging on cynicism and resignation (O GOD I NEED HUGS)  I feel _very_ old.  
I was always fond of Eeyore...but I must admit...Tigger's a wonderful 
thing...<grin> (So I just bought my 2-yr-old niece the Pooh tape about 
Tigger for Xmas.  I've been bouncing, flouncing and trouncing ever 
since.  Now that tune is running through everyone's mind, isn't it...)

>Thank you for allowing me to ramble.  I know that I did too.
Ahhhhh...but you made sense...that's okay, then.

>Peace and inner tranquility to all.
Are you kidding...I'm at work...<grin>

>Jim Dilmore - seamus@brahms.udel.edu    or    dilmore@che.udel.edu 
>   Deconstruct your Gender          Safe sex doesn't mean no sex.          
>Give me life, Give me pain,         It just means use your imagination. 
>Give me myself again.  Tori Amos.            Billy Bragg 

Sue (Banimpire -- who should have gone home about 4 hours ago, but 
decided to read and return mail instead.  Yeah...I've got a life, I 
just choose not to deal with it right now, thankyouverymuch.)

S.M. Hogan   | IHP/Heller School/Rm. G17/Brandeis University
617/736-3951 | Waltham, MA 02254-9110     [Add Disclaimer Here]
    /-------------------------------------------------------------\
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   When patterns are broken, new worlds emerge. --> Tuli Kupferberg
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