HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: aaron@space.ualberta.ca (Aaron Humphrey)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Alfvaen in the Haywagon
Date: 13 Aug 92 21:03:40 GMT
Reply-To: aaron@space.ualberta.ca
Organization: University Of Alberta, Edmonton Canada
X-Newsreader: Tin 1.1 PL4

Alfvaen has been carrying on an interesting conversation in the back of the
haywagon.

"What's your name again?"

"Timothy."

"I don't think I've seen you around Callahan's Place very much."

"Oh, I've probably been there, but I tend to stay out in the meadow.  Actually,
this is the only time I've really been on a long trip like this.  All thanks to
Didi."

"Well, let's not forget, you are a type of grass."

"This is true."

Alfvaen looks up as they enter the Enchanted Castle or whatever it is--he
managed to miss a sign or two back there.  "Where are we again?"

"The Enchanted Castle--you were right the first time."

"Why would anyone enchant a castle?  That would be an awful lot of work."

"They could do it a little at a time, I guess."

"I think it would be easiest just to enchant a model of the castle and then
transfer the dweomer over."

"Dweomer?  What kind of word is that?"

"The kind I learned from the AD&D Player's Handbook."

"Oh."

"Hmmm...Didi's saying something about a birthday."

"You're right."

Alfvaen listens carefully to Didi's words.  "Brandon?  Oh--Brandon Allbery!
Right!  It's his birthday today?  On Thursday the 13th?  Hmmm...unless I miss
my calculations, tomorrow his birthday will be on Friday the 13th.  Well, I
guess that's what he gets for signing his name with ++ all the time like he
used to..."

"Well we better wish him luck now, then."

Alfvaen and timothy say in chorus, "Happy Birthday, Brandon, and best wishes
for next year, when you'll need it."

"How old is he this year?"

"I don't recall offhand, but I don't think he's into the coot stage yet.  Of
course, I've been wrong before...I have problems guessing people's ages over
the Net."

"I know what you mean..."

"No you don't.  You're only a type of grass.  You've probably never read or
posted on the Net in your collective life."

"Oops.  Caught out again."

<Move over DJ, Lisa, and Robbie--here comes Alfvaen and timothy!>

<I can see why DJ does it, though--it's much fun...>

<No, that's our shortstop!>

--
---Alfvaen(a.k.a. Aaron V. Humphrey)
"So you found a girl who thinks really deep thoughts
 what's so amazing about really deep thoughts"  -- Tori Amos
Current Album--The Iron Man Soundtrack
Current Read--Henry David Thoreau:Walden and Other Writings
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: mbr2@quads.uchicago.edu (Curious Of All Natures)
Subject: Quote Happens [Time]
Reply-To: mbr2@midway.uchicago.edu
Organization: Universtiy of Chicago
Date: Tue, 18 Aug 1992 03:57:16 GMT

In a moment of bored curiosity, you lean forward to pick up the stray
soapbox that has been supporting your feet as you lean back in your
chair.  The peeling label reads:
 
                    **ACME Automatic Soapboxes**
              Enjoy the advantages of instant altitude-
                  enhanced elaboration and oratory!
 
Oddly enough, there's writing on the _back_ of the label as well.
Pulling the rest of the label from the box, you turn it over and find:


                       THOUGHTS ON TIME ITSELF

  I have realized that the past and future are real illusions, that
  they exist in the present, which is what there is and all there is.
                                                         -Alan Watts

  Time is but the stream I go a-fishing in.  I drink at it; but while
  I drink, I see the sandy bottom and detect how shallow it is.  Its
  thin current slides away, but eternity remains.  I would drink
  deeper; fish fill the sky, whose bottom is pebbly with stars.  I
  cannot count one.  I know not the first letter of the alphabet.  I
  have always been regretting that I was not as wise as the day I was
  born.                                          -Henry David Thoreau

  As if you could kill time without injuring eternity.  -H.D. Thoreau
 
  As if you could TELL time without injuring eternity.  -Matthew Ryan
 
  Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time 
  we have rushed through life trying to save.            -Will Rogers


These words have been collected in communicative desperation by a
fellow who's been wandering through life with a certian intuitive
wariness: he knows that time itself, the embodiment of our
ongoingness, is darn diffucult to touch or even approach with our own
deeply time-grounded concepts.  He has nothing clear to say, but
perhaps he has imparted his deep impression that somehow, somewhere,
something is the matter.


heal, affirmative; ; tumble; negative, duites   has been twitchingly
asleep on the X-windowsill for quite a long... um.  He will be... 
is?...  will have been?...  
He's *NOW* asleep, and continues to be, and _still_ is, and... hm.
HM.

-Matt Ryan, "I seem to be a verb." -Buckminster Fuller, 
mb-ryan@uchicago.edu                Curious Of All Natures
==================================  ====================================
If I'm dreaming, never let me wake. You'll never see the end of the road
If I'm awake, never let me sleep.   When you're traveling with me.
               -old chinese fellow                        -Crowded House     
==================================  ====================================
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: eoin@xocolatl.com (John F. Snyder)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: The New Kid
Date: Wed, 19 Aug 92 17:58:22 PDT
Reply-To: eoin@xocolatl.com
Distribution: world
Organization: Amethyst Systems, Fremont, CA

allbery@NCoast.ORG (Brandon S. Allbery KF8NH) writes:

-> As quoted from <1992Aug9.221458.16353@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu> by wyang@mag
-> +---------------
-> | during the spring), it's actually a pretty nice place to live, ignoring the
-> | mafia-run catoring industry and, of course, our proximity to the place we'r
-> | trying to give to Michigan, the city of Cleveland.....
-> +---------------
-> 
-> I should also point out that Columbus doesn't dare get rid of us:  they don't
-> consider a governor qualified to make a mess of Ohio until they've seen how
-> much of a mess he can make as mayor of Cleveland.  :-)  :-)

I thought it was Toledo that Ohio and Michigan trying to give to each other. :)



 eoin@xocolatl.com  |   Practice Random Kindness    /~~~~~~~~~~~~~\  /
 GEnie: J.Snyder18  |             and              <  D A R W I N  >< 
 CI$:   70313,3111  |   Senseless Acts of Beauty    \_____________/  \
 Prodigy:  NOT!!!!  |                                 _l _l  _l _l 
--------------------+   bounces?  Try:  eoin@eoin.net.netcom.com
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: lower-tony@CS.YALE.EDU (Tony Lower)
Subject: I came, I seed, I conquered
Organization: Yale University Computer Science Dept., New Haven, CT 06520-2158
 
   As the Doctor steps away from the bar, Manx steps up to take 
Date: Thu, 13 Aug 1992 17:49:05 GMT

   "Ah Doctor, I'm so glad you rose to the occasion.  Truly, you
had some dandy-lines there, which caused me to back-petal, bud
now I'm reedy to stem your tide and leaf you speechless. Thistle
blow your socks off.  Of gorse, some wilt think my speech is grass
and boorish,  but it's stamen comparison to what's to come.
As you wander in a daisy-ou'll have to admit that there's very 
little-lilac as a punster.  Ivy-ven made up a whole new category:
it couldn't have gone better if I'd plant it.

   "By the way, knot to be root, but is that scarf for sale? If
the question offends you, just remember that after tree vodkas,
I'm a little trunk.  But Elm-match any off-fir!  I'll buy you
a pine-t if yew wood cone-sidder.  It's azalea would never regret.
It's a beautiful scarf, and I maple-eed and beg if you refuse.

   "My rye sarcasm and wheat may go against your grain, but still 
I'll do my best to amaize you all.  But let's be cereals for a 
moment: I think a little corn-petition is necessary in the field
of puns.  We should take warning from the Soviet Union... we don't
want our puns to go the whey of the amaranth-sickle."


Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: embeach@pdaxs.techbook.com (Electronic Dreams)
Subject: Another Limerick
Organization: Portland Public Access sponsored by TECHbooks Bookstore
Date: Sun, 23 Aug 1992 00:23:52 GMT

Elana muses out loud...

"Well if one limerick is good, two must be better..."

So she drops down from the Lurkers Lair again, gets herself a beer, and 
proceeds to recite after downing half the pint...

There once was a man named Kinnerick
Who attempted to compose a limerick
He was doing just fine
'til he got to the last line,
But after several futile attempts at rhyming the last line with the 
first one, he finally gave up in disgust.

<gulp!>  <gulp!>  <gulp!>   <CRASH!!>
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Degrees for Teaching?
From: jwwalden@miavx1.acs.muohio.edu (P'relan)
Date: 13 Aug 92 09:57:37 -0500
Organization: Dept. of Physics

In article <1992Aug12.173805.1744@midway.uchicago.edu>, esti@quads.uchicago.edu (Paul A. Estin) writes:
> In article <tjlee.713199086@vincent1.iastate.edu> tjlee@iastate.edu (Tom Lee) writes:
> 
>>	"Sometimes I think about teaching in public schools, and an MS
>>gets you somewhere there," says the Lamplighter.  "Higher pay, for one
>>thing."
> 
> Anyone know if an M.A. has the same effect?  Actually, more generally,
> although I'm sure it varies from state to state, what *are* the
> requirements to become, say, a public high school teacher in subject
> X?  I'm curious.

Here in Ohio...well no, I guess I can't say that anymore so let's start over
again.  There in Ohio, an M.A. will often get you a better paying position
and get you a position in a better school district.  Now to become a permanent
high school teacher (I don't know what substitutes are required to have), you
need a state teaching certification which involves a state teacher's test and I
believe some education classes are required though I'm not sure how many and
that surely varies from state to state.  I do know some grad students who after
getting their B.Sc.'s went on to get a M.Sc. in physics and an M.A. in teaching
at the same time and they generally got very good positions (being in a science
area usually helps though I haven't seen more than a semester course in psy-
chology anywhere).  I hope that helps to give you at least a general idea of
what's required, Snark...

> "No, those aren't crustaceans, those are teabags." - Bill Hazelrig

Who was Meta saying that to???
 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 P'relan (and Birith)      	   ``Time stand still -
 jwwalden@miavx1.acs.muohio.edu      I'm not looking back -
  or jwwalden@miavx1.bitnet	     But I want to look around me now.'' - RUSH
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: hollombe@polymath.tti.com (The Polymath)
Subject: Re: Invisible Callahans
Organization: The Cat Factory
Date: Thu, 13 Aug 1992 00:35:55 GMT

In article <1992Aug10.111718.19858@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu> jpalmer@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu (John D Palmer) writes:
}In article <1992Aug10.045228.19045@ucc.su.OZ.AU> mar@physics.su.OZ.AU (David Mar) writes:
}>b. every one, bed; German one, beer mug
}
}    With Ein Stein, I have to think scientists, but I can't get albert out
}of the first two.  . . sigh.

every one: all
bed: board?  << this is reaching.  Board usually refers to meals
		as in "bed and board."

all board ein stein
    ^^^^^

I'd have used an avian reference, but it works.

The Polymath (aka: Jerry Hollombe, M.A., CDP, aka: hollombe@polymath.tti.com)
Head Robot Wrangler at Citicorp                   Turn the rascals out!
3100 Ocean Park Blvd.   (310) 450-9111, x2483     No incumbents in '92!
Santa Monica, CA  90405
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: JMPIERCE%USMCP6.bitnet@VM.TCS.Tulane.EDU (JIM PIERCE)
Subject: (none)
Organization: Yale CS Mail/News Gateway
Date: Fri, 14 Aug 1992 20:12:08 GMT


  "Bards just *know* eh ? Well, *I* happen to like ABBA also.
Makes an old coot happy to hear one of his likable groups being played
here in the Place !" DJ.

   I hate to say this, but next week being Fall Semester Registration
I wont have much time to read, let alone post, email. So, I'm not
forgetting to talk, I'm just really busy ! Next Wednesday would be the
best time to contact me. My email address pierce@navo.navy.mil is
*gone* ! But if you tried to contact me there, your mail bounced already.

   The place to email me is jmpierce@usmcp6 if you can send directly
to Bitnet or jmpierce%usmcp6.bitnet@vm.tcs.tulane.edu for connection
to my account via my nearest Internet gateway. We are getting some Unix
ooops AIX equipment next month or so...

 Later my friends, and to all the new folks, Welcome my Friends to the
Show that Never Ends !

 Dreamy Jim.


<JMPIERCE@USMCP6.BITNET> Jim Pierce
  'Now, thats what I call a dead parrot!' John Cleese
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: aaron@space.ualberta.ca (Aaron Humphrey)
Subject: Re: Degrees for Teaching?
Reply-To: aaron@space.ualberta.ca
Organization: University Of Alberta, Edmonton Canada
X-Newsreader: Tin 1.1 PL4
Date: Thu, 13 Aug 1992 16:15:26 GMT

Alfvaen looks confused.  "I thought this was fairly widespread, but since I
haven't actually traveled that much, I might find myself wrong again...

"In Alberta, at least, there is a B.Ed. degree(and a M.Ed. and an Ed.D., I
think), specifically for teachers.  You can go partway through the program and
get a 'certificate', but most people go for the degree--and now that I think
about it, certificates are mostly for those who already have other degrees, and
want to teach below the university level...

"Is this not the practice at other institutions?  Is Education just another
B.A. subject elsewhere?"

--
---Alfvaen(a.k.a. Aaron V. Humphrey)
"So you found a girl who thinks really deep thoughts
 what's so amazing about really deep thoughts"  -- Tori Amos
Current Album--The Iron Man Soundtrack
Current Read--Henry David Thoreau:Walden and Other Writings
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: jhitch@crash.cts.com (Jeffrey Hitchin)
Subject: Re: Who are these people?
Date: 23 Aug 92 05:25:55 GMT

Jeffrey Earl Hitchin (Grant Hillcroft)
Age: 23
Height: 6'2"
Weight: (I would prefer not to)
Eyes: Blue
Hair: Blond
Distinguishing features: paunch.  Really, that's it.  Not much to go by, huh?

	Actually, a friend of mine turned me onto this place (HI RACHEL) 
when I was at a pretty low point in college.  At the time, I was using
the name "Grant Hillcroft" as my username.  No reason, really.  Actually,
that's the name of a character I use in a GURPS campaign.  Kind of silly,
really.  However, I still use it here as many people know me as that, and
besides, it's more fun that way.  Grant and I look exactly the same.  We
also have about the same amount of frustration trying to make ourselves
understood.  Last Halloween, I went around dressed as Number 2 from the
Village, and nobody got it without my having to explain it.  Sheesh.
I love to cook (hence the paunch) and my favorite dishes are fondue.
(Big surprise there, I can hear you say.)  My hobbies include reading
tons o' mystery fiction and rubber stamps (for which there is no newsgroup
for, dammit).  Didi and kitten can tell you about my snail-mail letters. :)
What else, what else.  Well, around holidays I like to post long rambling
philosophical things here.  I'm not sure why, but it's a nice vent and
it's fun.  That's about all I can say, really.  That's all folks.
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: aaron@space.ualberta.ca (Aaron Humphrey)
Subject: Re: The New Kid
Reply-To: aaron@space.ualberta.ca
Organization: University Of Alberta, Edmonton Canada
X-Newsreader: Tin 1.1 PL4
Date: Wed, 12 Aug 1992 16:49:47 GMT

bsackste@AFIT.AF.MIL (Bernadette M. Sacksteder) writes:
: The New Kid steps up to the bar and clears her throat for attention. Silence 
: falls and she coughs slightly before beginning. 
: "Ahem. Um, I know I haven't been here very long, and I wish things were 
: different with all my heart, but I have to leave again. You see, the summer 
: job that gave me net access is ending and with it I go back to indefinite 
: lurking. It's been great being here, and I'll miss all of you VERY much. My 
: peanut-throwing skills have never been better. :-) But, this, however, is 
: how it goes, and, well... I guess what I'm trying to say is good-bye and I'
: ll miss you and I'll be back as soon as I possibly can. Until then, for my 
: last toast...
: 
: To Friends and Places To Meet Them In, and most especially, TO MIKE!"
: 
: Gulp! Crash, Bash, Bang, New level of broken shards in the fireplace. The 
: New Kid bows and heads off into the darkness of the back of the room. 
: 
: P.S. If anyone wants to stay in touch they could e-mail me and I'd be glad 
: to give them my snailmail address...

Alfvaen adds, "Or, if she's gone already by that time, email me, 'cause I have
a copy.  I saw her saying farewell in alt.is.too, and thought she might want to
do it here as well..."

--
---Alfvaen(a.k.a. Aaron V. Humphrey, Page of Newts)
Canadian Network For Space Research, Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
"There's too many clues in this room."  Gordon Lightfoot
Current Album--Bill Cosby:For Adults Only
Current Read--Henry David Thoreau:Walden and Other Writings
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: terry@cs.weber.edu (A Wizard of Earth C)
Subject: Re: Weird stuff
Organization: Weber State University  (Ogden, UT)
Distribution: usa
Date: Mon, 17 Aug 92 00:41:30 GMT

In article <1992Aug6.160317.1496@news.iastate.edu> SG.MML@isumvs.iastate.edu (M. Loughin) writes:

>In article <LGOLD.92Jul29170507@callahans.Cadence.COM>,
>lgold@callahans.Cadence.COM (Lynn Gold) writes:
>>One of the side-effects of working in radio is that you often wind up
>>doing promotional events.  On one of the stations where I do traffic,
>>the DJs (but luckily not the traffic people) get recruited to
>>participate in a "cow chip toss."
>>
>>Yes, it's for real.  They toss cow chips across a field; whoever's
>>chip lands farthest away wins.  I don't know WHAT they win, but they win.

I hope that what they win is first place in line at the sink... yuck!

>What's so unusual about that?  It's an annual 4th of July event
>at Independence Day picnics in Iowa.  I'm not sure the winners
>get anything for their efforts.  They do it for the joy of
>competition . . .

Hopefully the competition occurs *after* the picnic eating portion of the
celebration...
					Terry Lambert
					terry_lambert@gateway.novell.com
					terry@icarus.weber.edu
---
Any opinions in this posting are my own and not those of my present
or previous employers.
-- 
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
                                                       terry@icarus.weber.edu
 "I have an 8 user poetic license" - me
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: esti@quads.uchicago.edu (Paul A. Estin)
Subject: Re: Desctop Pub-lishing
Reply-To: esti@midway.uchicago.edu
Organization: U. Michigan Cognitive Psychology
Date: Fri, 14 Aug 1992 16:15:54 GMT

In article <1992Aug13.211046.27085@kakwa.ucs.ualberta.ca> aaron@space.ualberta.ca writes:
>this all together into a bestiary of sorts.  Here's a roll call of who-all is
>on my list..."
...
>Snark
...
>
>"Anyone who's not on this list feel free to post or email a description, or
>you'll end up being left out of the final compilation...although it will be a
>open-ended anyway.  Maybe it will even be a regular posting, called 'Who are
>these people, anyway?' or something like that.  Comments?"

Hmm, well, I have to change mine *some*time... hopefully, I won't be
as depressed forever as I am now!  Is it OK if I send a
less-depressed, more-complete intro to you in a few weeks or so?

-----
"I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they
fly by." --Douglas Adams

Paul Andrew Estin, net.Snark, r.a.c Welcome Poster, HoloMuck Chancellor,
  Fellow of the Clementine Society, UCSFC First Consul/ Keeper of the Slinky
HOME/ estin@csmil.umich.edu  214 Beakes St. Ann Arbor, MI 48104 313-769-4826
WORK: estin@um.cc.umich.edu  330 Packard Rd. 48104 313-763-5710
FUN ACCOUNT: esti@midway.uchicago.edu       phone numbers all changing soon!
From: eoin@xocolatl.com (John F. Snyder)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: anchovies and a filk
Date: Wed, 19 Aug 92 17:37:49 PDT
Reply-To: eoin@xocolatl.com
Distribution: world
Organization: Amethyst Systems, Fremont, CA

trumpins@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu (Barbara Trumpinski) writes:

-> "oooooooh, dreamy jim and company will be at confrancisco...hey nick,
-> this means a definite real space in your neck of the woods in
-> '93...and sea, and mandlebear, and lucky bitch, and aahz....and lots
-> of other callahanians...."  kitten is counting the days...1 year and 1
-> month.... 


2 weeks and counting for Magicon.

Are there any plans for a realspace there?

    \|/  Eoin    Just passing through to grab a cool drink.
     *  ------   

PS:  You can add me to the list as a ConFranciscian.



 eoin@xocolatl.com  |   Practice Random Kindness    /~~~~~~~~~~~~~\  /
 GEnie: J.Snyder18  |             and              <  D A R W I N  >< 
 CI$:   70313,3111  |   Senseless Acts of Beauty    \_____________/  \
 Prodigy:  NOT!!!!  |                                 _l _l  _l _l 
--------------------+   bounces?  Try:  eoin@eoin.net.netcom.com
From: hollombe@polymath.tti.com (The Polymath)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Who are these people?
Date: 19 Aug 92 17:52:50 GMT
Organization: The Cat Factory

In article <92230.101605U3E67@wvnvm.wvnet.edu> Cathy Ridings <U3E67@wvnvm.wvnet.edu> writes:

}I sometimes go by Kaitlin in Callahans, only because I love that name, I really
}haven't described Kaitlin any further.....  She would have no special powers
}except an extra large heart, which she wants to save the world with -- no more
}hungary or homeless people.  ...

"What have you got against Hungarians?" (-:{


The Polymath (aka: Jerry Hollombe, M.A., CDP, aka: hollombe@polymath.tti.com)
Head Robot Wrangler at Citicorp                   Turn the rascals out!
3100 Ocean Park Blvd.   (310) 450-9111, x2483     No incumbents in '92!
Santa Monica, CA  90405
Date: Tue, 18 Aug 1992 08:48:01 EDT
From: Cathy Ridings <U3E67@wvnvm.wvnet.edu>
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: RE: Who's Hungary??


Did I mention in my description that I can't spell worth S*!@!T.

A very embarrassed Kaitlin goes off to a corner to study.
Newsgroups: alt.callahans