HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: cheese@next05wor.wam.umd.edu (Jason Steinhorn)
Subject: Re: Number
Organization: Workstations at Maryland, University of Maryland, College Park
Distribution: rec
Date: Mon, 6 Apr 1992 18:46:00 GMT

In article <1992Apr6.050907.9690@pellns.alleg.edu> guptaa@.alleg.edu  
(Godfather) writes:
> In article <1992Apr6.022500.12268@nic.unh.edu>  writes:
> |>> Did any of you figure out what 2^ 99999 is. Well here it is.
>
>> 499501046507192253972016382165016795490214569527090845885764636931572 
>> 916232128674163743665666224825201582197222777927465009397830382808828
 							   ^
							   ^
|>I really thought the 126th number should have been a 7...I think you  
|>should check on that...
|

> |The 126th number IS a 7, silly!
> IT IS NOT ! !

Actually, my post was incorrect; the 126th number **IS** a 7!!! 
Newsgroups: rec.humor,alt.fan.monty-python
From: hucke@ux1.cso.uiuc.edu (Matt Hucke)
Subject: Re: Does anybody have the script to "The Argument Clinic" ?
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign
Date: Thu, 9 Apr 1992 22:52:19 GMT

In article <1992Apr8.215625.7686@b15.b15.ingr.com> bfh@b15.b15.ingr.com (Burgess Howell) writes:
>In <1992Apr6.144359.4349@news.Hawaii.Edu> tholen@galileo.ifa.hawaii.edu (Dave Tholen) writes:
>>>>>> >I've told you once...
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> No, you haven't.
>>>>>Yes I have.
>>>>No, you haven't.
>>>I'm sorry but your time is up, That will be $5.
>
>>What?!?  That was never five minutes!
>STOP! STOP! STOP!  You're in the wrong newsgroup.  Kindly take this to
No, we're not.

-- 
"What? Over? Did you say it's over? Nothing's over, till we decide it is! 
 Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!" --John Belushi
hucke@ux1.cso.uiuc.edu                        Gene Roddenberry 1921-1991
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: srl@phyast.nhn.uoknor.edu (Steve Levengood)
Subject: Re: Lawyer Joke Needed
Organization: Engineering Computer Network, University of Oklahoma, Norman, OK, USA
Date: Thu, 16 Apr 1992 19:01:43 GMT

	Q: New York City has the highest number of lawyers per capita, and
	   New Jersey has the highest number of toxic waste dumps per
	   capita.  Why is this so?

	A: New Jersey got first pick!

-Steve & Jim
From: guptaa@.alleg.edu (Godfather)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Wayne's World
Date: 6 Apr 92 08:03:34 GMT
Organization: Allegheny College

In article <1992Apr6.035358.21569@escom.com> al@escom.com (Al Donaldson) writes:
|Various people write:
|>>>|> >>>>W A Y !
|>>>|> >>>NO  W A Y !
|>>Give it up guys, this is about as funny as a borken leg.
|>
|>What type of a creature is a Borken, and why do you find them so un-amusing?
|>Especially their legs?
|
|He's probably referring to Judge Bork's third leg, which was probably
|the reason for the Judge being called the "Human Tripod".
|
|Al
NOOOOOO!!! He was talking about the third leg of the tripod ogre (pronounced BoRkkk! in
martian!!) invaders from mars who had nothing better to do but to invade earth during their siesta  
time. Remember the true story which H.G. Wells so cleverly and cunningly stole and made into a  
pathetic fictional parody!!!!!!
tsk...tsk...
--
<>/\<>\/<>/\<>\/<>/\<>\/<>/\<>\/<>/\<>\/<>/\<>\/<>/\<>\/<>/\<>\/<>/\<>\/<>
        			~~~~~~~~~guptaa@alleg.edu~~~~~~~~~~~
     o				My friends call me ______..in a nutshell.
 ___/(\/	I call myself a spaced out wasted entity existing in an
     <\		astract reality of unreal proportions.......	 
     " "......Touche pussycat!!
From: rv0s+@andrew.cmu.edu (Rahul Verma)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Sam Kinison is DEAD???????????
Date: 12 Apr 92 06:44:07 GMT
Distribution: usa
Organization: Carnegie Mellon, Pittsburgh, PA

Excerpts from netnews.rec.humor: 12-Apr-92 Re: Sam Kinison is DEAD????..
by Doug Morack@psuvm.psu.ed 
>     May he rest in peace.
>  
>                                                    -Doug
Nah! May he rest in pieces.

                                                     +Rahul
                                                    ========
                                                    Rahul-Doug


-------------------------------------------------------------------
Remember that anywhere you go, well, there you are!
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: disaacs@pietrzak.carleton.ca (Dave Isaacs)
Subject: Re: Nifty prank
Organization: Carleton University
Distribution: usa
Date: Thu, 16 Apr 1992 13:33:19 GMT

In <1992Apr15.013736.16386@athena.cs.uga.edu> quinby@athena.cs.uga.edu (James Quinby) writes:






>If you want to scare the living hell out of your favorite unsuspecting DOS
>user, include an ECHO in their AUTOEXEC.BAT file that says

>UMOUNT ERROR ON #, NO RING. SEE #700, PORT@

>or some other totally nonsensical error messgae. I did this to a computer
>buddy of mine and he almost had a heart attack before he saw me laughing 
>like a maniac. Even if they know DOS really well, chances are that the message
>will still frighten them :).

Once when a non computer literate friend of mine bought his first ever computer
I slipped a command into his autoexec file that echoed:

"Hello Rod.  This is just a reminder that I`m not feeling to happy today,
 so I wouldn't trust anything I do..."

The first time he saw it we heard this anguished scream from his room:

"Ahhhh! How the hell does it know my name!"


-- 
__________________________________________________________________________
 ____  ____  __  David Paul Isaacs ________________________________________
 _____ _____ __  Department of Mechanical and Aerospace Engineering ________
 _____ ____  __  Carleton University ________________________________________
 ____  __    __  Ottawa, Ontario ___________________________________________
_________________disaacs@ccs.carleton.ca __________________________________
From: em@jyu.fi (Erkki Mattila)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Where have all the Apple jokes gone?
Keywords: Apple, Macintosh
Date: 7 Apr 92 09:08:36 GMT
Organization: University of Jyvaskyla, Finland

PC and UNIX freaks, this is for you:

I need quickly a few good and relatively short Apple (Macintosh)
jokes. If you know any, could you e-mail them directly to me
(em@jyu.fi). Thanks.


-- 
*****************************************************
** Erkki Mattila, University of Jyv{skyl{, Finland **
** Internet: em@jyu.fi  Telephone: +358 41 621 169 **
*****************************************************
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: burtonr@coma.Colorado.EDU (Richard Burton)
Subject: Re: Foghorn Leghorn quotes
Organization: University of Colorado, Boulder
Date: Fri, 10 Apr 1992 19:02:41 GMT

Ralph Brendler writes:
>Eric Huppertz writes:
>
>>That dog's strictly G.I.--Gibberin' Idiot, that is. 
>>Nice boy, but he's got more nerve than a bum tooth.
>>That boy's got a mouth like a cannon--always shootin it off.
>>If that cat don't stop talkin so much, he'll get his tongue sunburned.
>
>- That boy's about as sharp as a bowling ball.
>- Pay attention, boy!  Do you think I'm talking just so's I can hear my
>head roar?

Or the classic:

That I say that's a joke son! The porch light's on but there ain't
nobody home! I keep pitchin' 'em and you keep missin' 'em! Missin'
'em, that is!

This is going to cause more confusion than a mouse at a burlesque 
show.
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Intel Ad shows static-proof CPU! : -)
From: rivero@mdcbbs.com
Date: 9 Apr 92 13:36:52 GMT
Organization: M&E (Division of EDS), Cypress CA
Nntp-Posting-User: rivero

In article <1992Apr8.140207.28216@acuson.com>, cary@acuson.com (Cary Farrier) writes:
> dmckeon@hydra.unm.edu (Denis McKeon) writes:
>>There is an Intel ad on pages 10 and 11 of the April 13 Newsweek (USA
>>news-stand edition) that shows two Van de Graaf generators on either
>>side of an i486 (tm) with dual "lightning" paths jumping between them. 
>>Caption reads: "The affordable power source for today's software."
> 
> They even animate them on the TV version of the ad.  I see it on ABC
> news every morning sometime between 5 and 5:30 am.  The funny part
> about the TV ad is that they say that with the i486 you can
> "run your programs at the speed of light"!  Uh huh.  So that means
> it will take about 8 minutes for my code to get from here to the sun,
> that's pretty good, they should go into the modem business :-).
> 

  I wouldn't worry about it. The only peple who would believe that ad
are the ones who'll take the cover off the machine to see the lightning
bolts!  :)






<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
|  Michael Rivero rivero@mdcbbs.com Homo Cyberneticus-Computational Man  |
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
|    EARLY RESULTS FROM THE NEW YORK PRIMARY!                            |
|    Clinton                                              17%            |
|    Brown                                                22%            |
|    Elvis in the white jumpsuit                          57%            |
<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: csmith@onetouch.COM (Craig Smith)
Subject: Re: Yet Another License Plate
Organization: MCS/OneTouch, Inc.
Date: Mon, 06 Apr 92 20:13:31 GMT
Keywords: License

Seen on an old Renault Le Car:

LE PLATES

-- 
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
::Craig Smith                                             csmith@onetouch.COM::
::Columbus, OH                                      ...!uunet!onetouch!csmith::
::"Life is a fulltime occupation."--Gene Kalman                              ::
From: griz@mentor.cc.purdue.edu (Dormouse)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: 1-800 Number in USA for Polish Jokes
Date: 10 Apr 92 05:21:27 GMT
Organization: Purdue University Computing Center

No, the number for polish jokes is...



1-800-634-POLZ

Try it, there is even some original ones.

-dormouse
-- 
+-----------------------------------+
|Of all of the things I have lost...|
|I miss my mind the most.           |
+-----------------------------------+
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: csmith@onetouch.COM (Craig Smith)
Subject: Re: Call for humor behind cars
Organization: MCS/OneTouch, Inc.
Distribution: usa
Date: Wed, 15 Apr 92 13:15:20 GMT

BUMPER STICKER:

Warning: I break for tailgaters

-- 
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
:: Craig Smith                                         csmith@onetouch.COM ::
:: Columbus, OH                                  ...!uunet!onetouch!csmith ::
::::::::::::::: "Life is a fulltime occupation."--Gene Kalman :::::::::::::::
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: wtm@uhura.neoucom.edu (Bill Mayhew)
Subject: Re: Intel Ad shows static-proof CPU! :-)
Organization: Northeastern Ohio Universities College of Medicine
Date: Sun, 12 Apr 1992 14:48:16 GMT

There's a similar TV ad that has some really nice computer
animation running up to a '486 with a sort of Jacob's ladder
looking arrangement around it.  Pure fantasy, of course, but a lot
of visual fun.  Check out CNN Headline News; the ad seems to run
regularly there.  I've also seen it in sports broadcasts.

I'm sure the electronically challenged will start to think that the
insides of their PCs look something like a miniature Frankenstein
laboratory.  Aside from the spark generator, the representation of
the computer parts was pretty accurate.

On a related note, I was hoping Intel would have handed out those
little clown-face claculators that are featured in their '387
magazine ads.  It would have been a nifty promotional gimmick for
trade shows.
-- 
Bill Mayhew      NEOUCOM Computer Services Department
Rootstown, OH  44272-9995  USA    phone: 216-325-2511
wtm@uhura.neoucom.edu   (140.220.1.1)
Newsgroups: rec.humor,rec.music.cd,rec.music.misc
From: robart@agora.uucp (Robert Barton)
Subject: Re: POLL
Followup-To: rec.music.misc 
Organization: Organization
Date: Thu, 16 Apr 1992 06:12:16 GMT

In article <1992Apr16.015052.29055@spectra.com> johnson@spectra.com (boyd johnson) writes:
>In article <1992Apr14.224332.12176@ux1.cso.uiuc.edu> eje47614@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu (Sir Tanon Drister) writes:
>>lunind@jec325.its.rpi.edu (Daniel B. Luning) writes:
>>
>>>Hello, since Weird Al just released a new album, I would 
>>>like to do a Weird Al poll.
>>
>>I have only one question:  What the hell is this doing in alt.rock-n-roll.metal
>and alt.music.enya and aus.music and ba.music and ...
>(I removed most of the groups from the header)


  rec.music.cd should be removed as well

-- 

If you do not file a return...we may also have to disallow the exemptions,
exclusions, credits, deductions, or adjustments shown on your tax return.
                                                                 - The IRS
From: ratner@ficus.cs.ucla.edu (David Ratner)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Smells Like Nirvana
Date: 16 Apr 92 16:08:16 GMT
Organization: UCLA, Computer Science Department

p_emond@pavo.concordia.ca (NAME PATRICK EMOND) writes:

>In article <1992Apr13.211947.1716@vax1.mankato.msus.edu>, mscs057@vax1.mankato.msus.edu writes...
>>Hey, I just saw the stupidest video on Mtv.
>>It was "Weird Al" and it was "Smells Like Nirvana".
>> 
>>It is a must never see.
>> 
>>Steve

>  On behalf of all Weird Al and Nirvana fans (or at least two of us here),



>  GET A SENSE OF HUMOR!!!!!!

I agree!  It's a great song!  Does anyone have the lyrics???

Dave
--
* *  ***  *     *    |   Dave Ratner
* *  *    *    * *  / \  ratner@cs.ucla.edu
* *  *    *    ***  \ /  "When you seek it, you cannot find it"
***  ***  ***  * *   |	 			- ancient Zen riddle
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: 11srust@galluj
Subject: Re:Re: Dumb Feminine Products
Organization: Gallaudet University
Date: Mon, 13 Apr 1992 04:37:01 GMT

	This is to RE:RE:Dumb Fem. Products:

		GET REAL! THIS IS A HUMOR LINE, FOR GOD'S SAKE!

			IF YOU WANT TO PISS AND MOAN ABOUT HOW WE MAKE

				FUN OF YOUR BLESSED PRODUCTS......


			go somehwere else!




	Q: What did Jesus say when he came out of the tomb?

	A: TA - DAAAAA!

Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: jdale@nsfuvax (Technical Manuscript Specialist)
Subject: Re: 1-800 Number in USA for Polish Jokes
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41    
Organization: Mathematics Computer Network, University of Oklahoma
Date: Thu, 9 Apr 1992 23:16:00 GMT

In article <1992Apr9.180720.24060@wpi.WPI.EDU>, sdoki@maxine.wpi.edu (Suresh Doki) writes...
> 
>Shaun makes a feeble attempt:
> 
>#Did you hear about the 1-800 number for Polish jokes?  Just dial:
>#	1-800-POL-ACKQ
>#If you like it, please tell your friends!
>#Shaun
> 
>You DUMBO! how in the world did you expect anyone to try this number?
>There is no 'Q' in the phone alphabet.
>you definitely must be a Polack!
> 
>Suresh


Suresh --

You MUST have tried the number!!!  Who's the polack?


j.
Xref: sparky rec.humor:16196 alt.tv.tiny-toon:2044 aus.jokes:533 aus.jokes.d:62
Newsgroups: rec.humor,alt.tv.tiny-toon,aus.jokes,aus.jokes.d
Subject: cmsg cancel <1992Apr10.212538.1736@nic.csu.net>
From: jtinkle@sparc1.sparc1.csubak.edu (j. tinkle )
Date: 10 Apr 92 23:33:03 PDT
Organization: California State University, Bakersfield

This message was cancelled from within rn.
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: csmith@onetouch.COM (Craig Smith)
Subject: Good News/Bad News
Organization: MCS/OneTouch, Inc.
Date: Tue, 07 Apr 92 14:21:44 GMT

A German Commandant gathered all of the POW's in the camp together and
announced:

"I haff zum gut newz unt zum bat newz. First ze gut newz.  All prizoners
vill be allowed to change undervare today.  Unt now, ze bat newz. Smith
vill change vith Johnson, Brown vill change vith Jones, . . ."
 
-- 
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
::Craig Smith                                             csmith@onetouch.COM::
::Columbus, OH                                      ...!uunet!onetouch!csmith::
::"Life is a fulltime occupation."--Gene Kalman                              ::
From: krober@lonestar.utsa.edu (Kristie A. Roberson)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Things that make you go hmmm
Date: 15 Apr 92 16:08:34 GMT
Organization: University of Texas at San Antonio

In article <odtxjBi00YVX83jgQL@andrew.cmu.edu> rv0s+@andrew.cmu.edu (Rahul Verma) writes:
>Excerpts from netnews.rec.humor: 11-Apr-92 Re: Things that make you go..
>by Adam Levin@pip.cc.brande
>>How do you know when you've run out of invisible ink?
>
>The eskimos tell you.

I'm sorry, but neither I nor my friends got this one.
Can someone please explain it to us
Thanks
-- 
krober@lonestar.utsa.edu        ::       *  BRIDGE IS LIKE SEX  *
Kristie ( red ) Roberson        ::    If you don't have a good partner,
:-[                             ::    You better have a good hand.
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: fester@island.COM (Mike Fester)
Subject: Re: CLOSE
Organization: /usr/local/rn/organization
Date: Fri, 10 Apr 1992 16:05:57 GMT

In article <32375@darkstar.ucsc.edu> drothar@ucscb.UCSC.EDU (the Omniscient) writes:
>
>In article <1992Apr4.072000.18@vax001.kenyon.edu> toney@vax001.kenyon.edu writes:
>> "By the way, 'Two-Dogs-Making-Love', why did
>> you ask?"     [please note: I cleaned this one up a bit]
>
>This reminds me of an observation a certain comedian made [I forget who] about
>the movie "Dances With Wolves" - apparently [I've never seen the movie myself,
>so don't flame me if I'm mistaken] Kevin Costner was named "Dancing-with-wolves"
>because, as the comedian said, "that's what the Indians found him doing."
>
>"Perhaps if they had gotten there half an hour earlier, the movie would have
> been called 'Wiping With Leaves'."

Have you heard about the sequel? It's tentatively eintitled "Sleeps with
Foxes"

Mike
-- 
Disclaimer - These opiini^H^H damn! ^H^H ^Q ^[ .... :w  :q  :wq  :wq! ^d  X ^?
exit X Q  ^C ^? :quitbye  CtrlAltDel   ~~q  :~q  logout  save/quit :!QUIT
^[zz ^[ZZZZZZ ^H  man vi ^@  ^L  ^[c  ^# ^E ^X ^I ^T ? help  helpquit ^D  ^d 
man help ^C ^c help exit ?Quit ?q CtrlShftDel "Hey, what does this button d..."
From: syspb@smartstar.com (Paul)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Light bulb joke
Date: 14 Apr 92 20:40:01 GMT
Distribution: na
Organization: none

How many Husbands does it take to change a light bulb?

None, they let the bitch do the dishes in the dark!
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: bianc@next09cville.wam.umd.edu (WierdnesS)
Subject: Enter Sandman
Organization: Workstations at Maryland, University of Maryland, College Park
Date: Thu, 16 Apr 1992 23:41:28 GMT

I found this in alt.rock-n-roll.metal.metallica
sorry, I forgot who wrote it

If the author reads this, maybe he will come forward!

LATER DUDERS!


ENTER PIZZAMAN

Stay inside, dial the phone
And don't forget, you clone
To include my calzone.
Pizza Man, he deliver
Makes your stomach quiver
'Till he gets to your home.

Sit with one ear open, listening at the door.

(chorus:)
Call once more!
Order four!
Bite your lip,
He won't leave without a tip.

If it's hot, then it's good.
I'd eat it if I could,
Do you think that I should?
I like my cheese and macaroni,
And my pies pepperoni;
When I'm hungry for food.

Sit with one ear open, listening at the door.

(chorus)

Now I see the melted cheese,
Toppings piled up to my knees.
I don't know who I can trust
Not to eat this tender crust.

Hey little sister, that's not nice.
No, I won't give you my last slice.
I'm still hungry; return it please.
You should be counting calories.

(chorus)

Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: bcperry@eos.ncsu.edu (BRENT COLE PERRY)
Subject: Re: April fool's day jokes?
Reply-To: bcperry@eos.ncsu.edu (BRENT COLE PERRY)
Organization: Project EOS - North Carolina State University
Date: Mon, 6 Apr 1992 16:02:28 GMT

My cousin that is still in high school (it's a rather small school, BTW, 
and the teachers and students came become close),  pulled one of the best 
I've heard on a high school level.  He went to the guidance office and got 
a form that you'd fill out if you wanted (or had) to transfer schools.  He 
got some of his teachers to sign it, and he decided he was going to nail 
his English teacher with this joke.  He went to her room, and said, "Here. 
You need to sign this, Mrs. Stephenson."  (I had  this lady.  She can get 
REALLY over-emotionlal at times.) 

She asked, "What is it?"

My cousin replied, "I'm moving to Florida."  He then started sniffing 
a lot, mainly due to his cold (but she didn't know that).

Anyway, she starts saying how she's going to miss him and stuff, gives him
a hug, etc., and almost starts to cry.  My cousin stops her and says, 
"HA!  APRIL FOOLS!"

--Brent

.sig?  I don't need no stinkin' .sig!
From: matth@wheaton.edu (Matthew Hayward)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Request
Date: 8 Apr 92 01:50:46 GMT
Distribution: usa
Organization: Wheaton College

I posted the argument clinic script, now could some kind soul repost the
large list of answering machines ( my email is messed up ) please oh please
oh please Thanks in advance.
From: mcsweinberg@memstvx1.memst.edu
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Bar Joke
Date: 13 Apr 92 11:55:19 -0600
Organization: Memphis State University

One of my favorites:

Guy goes into a bar and sees this bucket of money infornt of this old horse,
so he asks the guy in the bar what is up? So they tell him you put a $5 in
the bucket and if you can make the horse laugh you get all the money. So 
the guy says ok sure he put's his $5 in there whispers in the horse's ear
and all of a sudden this horse is laughing I mean he's rolling on the
floor so the guy takes the money and leaves. A couple of month's later
the guy walks back into the bar and the money in the bucket is substansial (sp?
and  this time they tell him he has to make the horse cry so he goes over
to the horse and does something and the horse starts crying. I mean this
horse is ready to commit suicide, So the guy takes the money. Then the guy's
in the bar ask him "Look we have to know what did you do?" and the guy
replies "Well the first time I told him my dick was bigger than his and
the second time I showed him."

Rai.
MCSWEINBERG@MSUVX1.MEMST.EDU
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Is the enemy of my enemy my friend or is the enemy of my enemy my enemy?
	The enemy of my enemy is my enemy." Dick Tracy.

Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: burtonr@qso.Colorado.EDU (Richard Burton)
Subject: Bob and Tom/Q95
Organization: University of Colorado, Boulder
Distribution: usa
Date: Wed, 15 Apr 1992 21:57:27 GMT

For any Bob and Tom/Q95 fans out there: are they going to come out with
another race album for this year's Indy 500? If so, when will it be
out? 


Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: orson@bluemoon.rn.com (Craig Smith)
Subject: Re: Things that make you go hmmm
Organization: Blue Moon BBS ((614) 868-998[024])
Date: Sun, 12 Apr 92 21:54:12 EDT


> Why does sour cream have an expiration date?
> 
So they can raise the price for Aged Sour Cream?

 This is from
     orson@bluemoon.rn.com
who doesn't have their own obnoxious signature yet
From: ram@artecon (Ramesh S. Rao)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: *Nebraska jokes anyone?*
Date: 8 Apr 1992 21:00:48 -0500
Organization: CS Dept, University of Texas at Austin
NNTP-Posting-Host: cs.utexas.edu




	If you have some Nebraska jokes (good/bad/ugly), please
	e-mail it to :

		ram%artecon@hp-sdd.sdd.hp.com

	Thanx.
							Rames (no h)
--
From: stumpf@cs.washington.edu (Todd Stumpf)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Yet Another License Plate
Keywords: License
Date: 9 Apr 92 20:21:13 GMT
Organization: Computer Science & Engineering, U. of Washington, Seattle


   Riding the bus back from the University, I glanced down at the
 cars next to the bus and saw a cherry-red Jaguar XJ-S V12 with a
 california license plate that read
  
      967 GIRL
 
   With a, you guessed it, beautiful blonde driving.  I kid you not!
 One in a million, I tell ya!
From: sma3@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu (STEPHANIE MICHELLE ARNDT)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: hey wad0
Date: 14 Apr 92 02:29:09 GMT
Article-I.D.: ns1.1992Apr14.022909.109076
Organization: Lehigh University


    Here's one for you billy:

    Two guys walk into a bar.


        [page down]

















    OW!!!  It was an iron bar...

    I know it's stupid, BUT..................

Steffers
Newsgroups: rec.humor,alt.fan.monty-python