HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: stuarta@syd.dms.CSIRO.AU (Stuart Andrews)
Subject: Re: Won't have Sex with a Fat Guy
Organization: CSIRO Division of Mathematics and Statistics, Australia
Date: Wed, 14 Oct 1992 09:55:12 GMT

> if he didn't lose weight, she wouldn't have sex with him anymore...

Well, isn't that just a bit insensitive, or is it me?

Tough question. There are two sides to the story. Like Kerryn says in a
previous posting, we are all the same inside, and we all have feelings.
"For better or for worse" <- took the words right out of my mouth Kez.

Other side, this is not the man she married. Horrible as it sounds, physical
size/shape/etc DO have something to do with it.

> She is in good shape...

The writer doesn't say how she stays in shape - is it natural or does he work a
it? If she does things to get fit, include hubby.

>hinted around a bit in an indirect way....

Hang on, hang on, A marriage is no place for hinting around a bit in an
indirect way now is it. They married each other (I hope) because they loved
each other, because they felt comfortable together, because they could talk.
Talk - the catchword. What she has to do is come right out and say what she
needs to say. Hopefully the relationship is such that they can talk.
"I think you have put on some weight lately, and I don't find you as physically
attractive as I used to" is still going to hurt but it is a damn sight better
than "No more sex 'till you lose some weight you fat turd" :-)

> totally turned off by his naked appearance...

A sad, but real fact of life. Face it, if you had been used to having
sex with Han Solo, wouldn't you find Jabba the Hutt a bit of a turn off.

anyhow, I've about run out of ideas...

G
.

-- 
   "Everything in this book may be wrong."
                                    Richard Bach
/////////////////////////////////////\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
Geoffrey Breach (masquerading as stuarta)
   AWA Communications. Lane Cove, Sydney, NSW, Australia. Voice 61,2,413 6333
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
AWA Communications don't know I'm doing this and CSIRO think I'm somebody else
so I'm afraid that the only person responsible for this posting can be me!
\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\///////////////////////////////////////
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: bena@yoyo.cc.monash.edu.au (Ben Aveling)
Subject: Re: Balance
Organization: Monash University General Access Unix
X-Newsreader: TIN [version 1.1 PL6]
Date: Wed, 7 Oct 1992 13:17:58 GMT

Stephen Ollis (ollis@redbck.stl.dec.com) wrote:
: 
: How do you balance the obvious opposites that you and your SO have?
: For example, I like to stay home and watch a video with my SO, she however
: loves to go out and party.. 

Get a video of a party ?  Seriously, some sort of compromise.
Go out, but not to anywhere you'll have to perform.  A play,
or dinner with friends.  Nah, you'd probably both end up
unhappy.  Maybe you should just hold your parties at home. :-)

	Good Luck,

	Ben
From: keithg@cnmhnet.UUCP (keith garrard)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Long Distance/HS-College Relatinshps.
Date: 14 Oct 92 22:22:50 GMT
Organization: California-Nevada Methodist Homes

In article <1992Oct12.051052.25520@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> ncole@nyx.cs.du.edu (Noah Cole) writes:
>I am involved in a relationship with a girl at home in New Hampshire who is in her Junior year of High School.  I started my first year of college here at

Give it up.  The girl is probably 16 years old.  She is too young
to want to really settle down, and for that matter, so are you.
Even though she may like the idea of dating you, cause you are
a "college man", it won't last because you aren't around enough
to "keep an eye on her".  I mean this in a manner that you aren't
around enough to see to her daily needs.  Consequently, when that
"guy in English class" who looks good to her asks her out for a 
hamburger after school, it gets a lot easier for her to say "yes"
when you aren't around for her to run into.  She then does it more
often, and before you know it, she has met someone else she likes
better, and you are the recipient of a "dear john" letter.  Find a
high school girl near your college.  Then you get the best of both
worlds!
--Keith

Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: weaver@jetsun.weitek.COM (Michael Gordon Weaver)
Subject: Re: First Date ?
Organization: WEITEK Corporation, Sunnyvale CA
Date: Fri, 9 Oct 92 23:33:28 GMT

In article <1992Oct8.103804.10252@bsu-ucs.uucp> 00llhamilton@bsu-ucs.uucp writes:
>
>Just thought I would give you guys a helpful hand on what women like on 
>the first date.  The movies, dinner, and your place is nice BUT what we
>enjoy most is when a man is creative on a date.  I am a college student
>at Ball State University and I know that men can't always afford to take
>women out to an extragant restaurant.  So here are just a few examples of
>what would make a woman fall head over heals (taken from the MGT 417 class):
>	1.  Taking a walk along the river just around the time that the
>	sun is going down.
>	2.  Instead of cooking at your place have a picnic at a park.
>	3.  If you are athletic, invite her to play a  sport with you and
>	teach her how to play.  For example, a good  sport that women are
>	interested in is racquetball.
>	4.  If those things don't interest you then try to be more  creative
>	in the things that you plan to do.  If you are cooking dinner at
>	your place then make it "candlelight".  If you are going to a movie
>	choose a comedy to make things flow easier and afterwards do something
>	like go play "putt-putt" or go bowling. 
>

These are wonderful ideas for dates, but a *first* date can be pretty stressful.
I wouldn't want to plan something too exciting or romantic for a first
date unless I already knew the woman well enough to be comfortable
around her and to have a good guess of what she would be comfortable 
doing. Usually, dealing with someone new is exciting enough.
Of course, your mileage may vary.

Michael.

--------

What Do Most People Do on a Date??

        "On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and
         that usually gets them interested enough to go for a
         second date."
                                                -Martin, 10
From: 09143@ravel.udel.edu (Nemo)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Multi-lingual list of 'I Love You...'
Keywords: Love, languages.
Date: 13 Oct 92 18:27:58 GMT
Organization: University of Delaware
Originator: 09143@ravel.udel.edu

Hi 'all,

There was a list floating around the net a few months ago which had
'I Love You' translated into a few dozen languages. For want of a
better place to ask, I am posting here in the hope that one of the
a.r readers would have come across it and saved it. Would some kind
soul please e-mail it to me?

Thanks!
Vikram
09143@ravel.udel.edu
From: zaidioa@HYDRA.ROSE-HULMAN.EDU (Omar A. Zaidi)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: just got back from a weekend with my SO
Date: 12 Oct 1992 17:05:30 GMT
Organization: Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology
Reply-To: zaidioa@HYDRA.ROSE-HULMAN.EDU
NNTP-Posting-Host: hydra.rose-hulman.edu

greetings to all,
	I just got back from a romantic weekend with my lover who is in 
Minnesota. I am here in Indiana. Yes, it's a LDR, but this weekend seemed
to just re-enforce the feelings of love which I had already develoiped for
her (we've met once in person before). 

To all the skeptics who think love can't work, you have to give it a chance.
I knew I was taking a risk when I first met Jennifer, but I stuck to my guns
in the hope and belief something really good would happen and it did.

Love has to be given a chance to grow. 

Jennifer, if you read this.. I love you. with all of me and I will always 
remember what we've done and will do :-)

cheers to all

Omar Zaidi
From: walkerr@bigwpi.WPI.EDU (Robert A Walker)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Won't have Sex with a Fat Guy
Date: 15 Oct 92 15:34:02 GMT
Organization: Worcester Polytechnic Institute
NNTP-Posting-Host: bigwpi.wpi.edu

In article <146@cnmhnet.UUCP> keithg@cnmhnet.UUCP (keith garrard) writes:

>I don't blame her at all.  She should be upset with her
>husband for not taking care of himself.  She has told him
>how she feels.  If he doesn't do anything about it, then
>she should dump him and get someone with some self respect.
>I had a friend of mine, who upon getting engaged, had it
>put in a prenuptial agreement that if either he or his
>bride to be got fat, then it would be sufficient grounds
>for divorce.  Neither one of them got fat.  Unfortunately,
>they later did divorce for other reasons though!  
>The guy in this case though, has a problem.  He ought to 
>realize that he has gotten fat.  It is easy to lose a few
>pounds now, rather than have to lose 75 pounds later.

	What is worse is when your SO constantly complains about how big they 
are getting and nevers does anything about, even with constant help, like come
on lets go work out, or "I jsut bought you an excersize bike that you asked 
for, now can you at least sit on it once?"  What do i do in this type of 
situation?  There is consent on both sides that said person needs to lose
weight, but said person refuses to do anything about it. Said person also
complains consatantly about being over weight.  Whats the deal, I don't get
it will someone please explain it to me.  Please
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: robg@citr.uq.oz.au (Rob Geraghty)
Subject: Re: puzzled..
Organization: Prentice Centre, University of Queensland
Date: Mon, 12 Oct 1992 22:10:26 GMT

<MGR104@psuvm.psu.edu> writes:

>I wasn't just doing it for myself (I
>know how fake this must sound), but I was doing it for the two of us.

The really difficult thing is getting the other person to understand
this.  The chances are that they won't feel the same way.  It really
hurts when they are angry and bitter at you when you are trying to do
the best thing for both people.

Rob

--
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Rob Geraghty                         | Time, flowing like a river
robg@durian.citr.oz.au               | Time, beckoning me
CITR                                 | APP
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: blazic@ecf.toronto.edu (BLAZIC Joseph R)
Subject: Re: How do you know if you are in love?
Organization: University of Toronto, Engineering Computing Facility
Date: Tue, 13 Oct 1992 05:26:37 GMT

Disclaimer: for those possibly interested in an intellectual, as opposed
to emotional, discussion, read on.  If not, forget about it.

In article <00961ECF.F5607000@Msu.oscs.montana.edu> you write:
>...
>And because you love this person, this person will bring out all of your
>best qualities and you will feel like a new, improved version of yourself. 

Or this person's bad qualities (which you don't see because you're temporarily
blind) will drag you down and limit you.

>Someone will ask you why you love this person, and while you may be able to
>list their admirable qualities ad nauseum, the Real, True Answer will be a slow
>shrug of the shoulders, a soft smile, and an "I don't know.  I just love."

And when this undefined and ambiguous thing (love) goes away, you'll be
listening to "Thorn in my side" by the Eurithmics or something like that.
Basically, you'll realize that you've been very foolish and got taken by
someone who was simply holding you back because of their selfishness (although
they might have termed it "love").  You'll know you could have done better,
and should have.

I'm interested in any academic replies to this, as far as I'm concerned,
hypothetical situation (although I'm positive it happens, the song is
proof enough).

Regards to all,

/Joe
From: terrylee@wpi.WPI.EDU (The Cookie Goddess)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: What do you give a guy for a Gift?
Date: 12 Oct 92 21:50:11 GMT
Organization: Worcester Polytechnic Institute
NNTP-Posting-Host: wpi.wpi.edu


As long as we are on this topic, I thought I'd share what I did/ am in the 
process of doing to my RP for his birthday.

First some background...  He is turning 21 today.  We both are involved in
medeival groups, and we are both a little off the wall. To give you some idea
of how off the wall, when we went for a drive today to admire the beautiful
New England foilage (leaves) he described the countryside as looking "like
someone had dumped Fruity Pebbles all over the state"  Also, a good friend
of his is also turning 21 today.


Anyway....

I started his birthday process on Friday. I managed to find a set of feast
gear for him (medeival dishes).  As these types of dishes are not sold in
regular stores, he was rather happy.

Then, last night, some friends and I threw him a surprise party, and gave
him, among other things, a "mosquito trap" a pair of inflatable "huge feet"
and a little "rattlesnake eggs" envelope.

For a birthday card, I gave him the following poem, along with a red and white
flower of some sort (I couldn't find a Fire and Ice rose, and never did find 
out what type of flower I ended up with. It looks kinda like a carnation,
is red and white, and smells like cinnamon)


              A White Rose

The red rose whispers of passion,
And the white rose breathes of love;
O,the red rose is a falcon,
And the white rose is a dove.

But I send you a cream-white rosebud,
With a flush on its petal tips;
For the love that is purest and sweetest
Has a kiss of desire on the lips.

-John Boyle O'Reilly
1844-1890


Then I gave him a votive candle holder, and a few candles scented with his
favorite flavors. (Yankee Candle Company has _really_ nice scents. I definatly
recommend them)

Tonight the girlfriend of the other guys who is turning 21 and I are taking
the two guys out for dinner, and then for dessert at an ice cream place.
I have one final gift to give him, but I don't want to post it until after
I give it.

Someone here on Alt.romance was saying that it would be nice if girls gave 
guys flowers once in a while. I'm glad they said that, because
it gave me the idea to give my RP the poem with the flower.


Sorry this is so disjointed...its finals week here at WPI, which means
only a minute fraction of my brain can be spared from studying to type
this article.

-terrylee

----------------------------------------------------------------------------
  "Sanity is only for people who can't bounce        | terrylee@wpi.wpi.edu
   a reality check"                                  | Patricia Currier
                      -Hikaru Hiyama  KOR            | Box 2900, WPI
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: dahead00@nx28.mik.uky.edu (Zippidy Do Dah)
Subject: Re: How do you know if you are in love?
Organization: University Of Kentucky, Dept. of Math Sciences
Date: Mon, 12 Oct 1992 10:11:55 GMT

In article <1992Oct10.054655.28414@netcom.com> marcia@netcom.com (Marcia)  
writes:
> In article <BvM7K0.wI@mentor.cc.purdue.edu>  
darkmoor@mentor.cc.purdue.edu (Darkmoore) writes:
> >
> >  How do you know if you are in love?
> 
Listen to the song "Gods Own Drunk" by Jimmy Buffet

If you feel OK about the bear even after what he did to the still you are  
probably in love.....

As long as you are prepared for the inevitable hangover go for it....

Zippy D  Who prefers his bears to cover the floor in front of a fireplace
From: s342063@emu.insted.unimelb.edu.au
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Won't have Sex with a Fat Guy
Date: 14 Oct 92 13:48:58 GMT

In message 20805 of the alt.romance board :
P.8188 askes for advice on what her friend should do about her fat husband.

What a person looks like shouldn't matter..if you love someone enough..then you
learn to live with their flaws...you take the good things with the bad.....
"For better or for worse"

Fat people have feelings too you know...we are all people with the same
feelings...just because our body size is different doesn't mean we think on
different wavelengths !!  Inside every fat person there is a thin person trying
to get out........In my opinion...fatter people are sometimes nicer and more
senstive than their thinner counterparts.....although I don't want to get into
a fight with anyone about it..........

I think she should just go about it in a gentler way...like suggesting they do
aerobics together or go for walks everyday.........and pretend it is for
"romantic" reasons........go for bike rides to see the scenery.....etc...use
your imagination to think up some more.............

Hope they sort out their problems......

Kerryn.
S342063@emu.insted.unimelb.edu.au
Organization: Engineering Design Research Center, Carnegie Mellon, Pittsburgh, PA
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Date: Wed, 14 Oct 1992 09:31:12 -0400 
From: "Andrea B. Gansley-Ortiz" <ag1v+@andrew.cmu.edu>
Subject: Re: Where do I go from here?

Two gentlemen give this advice:

> > I have GIRLFRIENDS who do the same to me!  They only call you up
> > when there is nothing exciting happening in their life or when 
> > they want to tell you all your problems.  
> > 
> > I think she isn't being HONEST with you and playing with your 
> > heart strings because she knows you would do anything for her 
> > at a drop of a hat.  
> > 
> > You deserve better than that!  DUMP HER for good!
>  
> I second that.  She's using you for all you're worth.
>  
> When it's going well, she drops you just to she if you'll
> come bakc.  She's playing major games with your mind!

Hearing this is kind of scary. Because I'd like to have more
generosity in my heart for someone who'd done something similar
to me.

I'd give her the benefit of the doubt. But I'd try to break my
romantic interest on the person. (And, oh G-d is that hard.) But
I think I hurt less by giving the benefit of the doubt than 
thinking that he intentionally was trying to hurt me and make
me think a progression in the relationship was possible when he
wasn't interested at all.

Just one perspective.

ag
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: dahead00@nx28.mik.uky.edu (Zippidy Do Dah)
Subject: Re: How long has it been?
Organization: University Of Kentucky, Dept. of Math Sciences
Date: Mon, 12 Oct 1992 15:01:16 GMT

In article <1992Oct12.130149.203068@uctvax.uct.ac.za>  
krgjus01@uctvax.uct.ac.za writes:
> In article <1992Oct9.161544.4856@ms.uky.edu>, dahead00@nx28.mik.uky.edu  
(Zippidy Do Dah) writes:
> > In article <1992Oct9.125743.203045@uctvax.uct.ac.za>  
> > krgjus01@uctvax.uct.ac.za writes:
> >> In article <1992Oct6.134605.16183@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu>,  
> > mneeley@nyx.cs.du.edu (Mark Neeley) writes:
> >> > How long has it been since you were kissed by a member of
> >> > the opposite sex?
> >> > 
> >> > 	Mark (almost a year)
(stuff deleted)
>  
> So what category do you fall under ?
Amazon Women and large kitchen appliances (gas range, washing machine,  
etc...)
> Personally I'm into my greens ,salad valley if you know what I mean.
No haven't a clue and don't really care
> So Mark , what do you think ? 
Don't know but I'd guess he is laughing that his flame bait worked
> Does Zippidy Do want to yank my Do-Da ?
If all you got is a Do-Da it probably ain't worth yanking
> The Mouse Man
Need I say More!!

Zippy D Who only gets fooled some of the time
From: . <@>
Subject: Re: Query
X-Xxmessage-Id: <A704BDC947010B1C@mac3.di.unipi.it>
X-Xxdate: Fri, 16 Oct 92 17: 43:21 GMT
Organization: Department of Computer Science,  Pisa University
X-Useragent: Nuntius v1.1.1d9
Date: Fri, 16 Oct 1992 17:43:54 GMT

In article <1992Oct13.165232.1@vx24.cc.monash.edu.au> ,
eda772dsys@vx24.cc.monash.edu.au writes:
>In article <1992Oct11.040258.23374@monu6.cc.monash.edu.au>, 
>cskksc@yoyo.cc.monash.edu.au (Chung S Khan) writes:
>> In article <1992Oct9.091556.1@emu.insted.unimelb.edu.au> 
>s342063@emu.insted.unimelb.edu.au writes:
>>>In reply to s344021@emu.insted.edu.au :
>>>
>>>I believe that an SO is a "significant other"
>>>
>>>Would someone clarify this please ?
>>>
>>>Hope that helps :)
>
>   To me it would mean Sweet One ;-)
>

To me it stands for "Sexual Object"
From: isar@ac.dal.ca
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Army Boots?
Date: 7 Oct 92 19:32:16 -0300
Organization: Dalhousie University, Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada



  Whhhoooooooaaaaaa..

    What's this rabid feminist bashing around here??? Get a clue, people...

There are radicals everywhere (and hey, more power to them, they're the squeaky
wheel that gets us all the grease), but feminism does NOT equal man-hating in
any way shape or form.  Heck, take me, I'm a dedicated feminist, I looooove the
opposite sex, I have more than my fair share of high heels and spandex in my
wardrobe (if u got it, flaunt it) and I can out put out a mean gourmet meal in
20 minutes flat.. Tootin' my own horn???   Naahh, there's lots of us out there..

  Being a feminist doesn't mean we think we're superior, or even exactly the
same in every biological/sociological aspect.  It means that we want as much
recognition for what we are and what we do as men have for what they do and what
they are.  We want to have the opportunity to strut our stuff w/out being run
over by the sexist jokes or hitting the glass ceiling; we want to truly SHARE
the power base.  Fair enuff, eh??

 Unfortunately we've still got a loooong way to go and this absurd, blind,
destructive feminist bashing is only one of the many symptoms that plague us...

..sigh... Peace..



 Isa R.
From: dswt@bnr.co.uk (Stewart Tansley)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Men.
Date: 9 Oct 92 17:51:25 GMT
Reply-To: dswt@bnr.co.uk (Stewart Tansley)
Organization: BNR Europe Limited, London Road, Harlow, Essex, GB

In the referenced article s342063@emu.insted.unimelb.edu.au writes:
>MEN.
>
>They say they really love you,
>but they never really do.
>They say you are the one and only,
>but it's never really true,
>They say you'll be together,
>for ever and a day,
>But somehow things don't seem
>to quite work out that way.
>
>Kezzle.

WOMEN.

They say they really love you,
but they never really do.
They say you are the one and only,
but it's never really true,
They say you'll be together,
for ever and a day,
But somehow things don't seem
to quite work out that way.


Well *someone* had to waste the bandwidth! ;-)

===========================================================================
Stewart Tansley     | BNR Europe Limited              |  'Be cool, or be
                    | London Rd, Harlow, CM17 9NA, UK |    cast out...'
dswt@bnr.co.uk      | +44 279 429531 x2763 (ESN 742)  | Subdivisions, Rush
===========================================================================
  'You know how that rabbit feels -- going under your speeding wheels...'
===========================================================================
Newsgroups: alt.romance