HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: bryanh@dseg.ti.com (Bryan Hazel)
Subject: Re: More foul-mouthed Paul...
Reply-To: bryanh@dseg.ti.com
Organization: Just Me
Date: Tue, 15 Sep 1992 00:02:57 GMT

In article 716224935@mik.uky.edu, tim@mik.uky.edu (timothy c huesman) writes:
>In <BuAA0F.3u9@acsu.buffalo.edu> gmkoenig@acsu.buffalo.edu (Gerson V Koenig) writes:
>
>>ph111-bx@violet.berkeley.edu (;;;;7202) writes:
>>>This brings to mind George Carlin's famous line about how context is
>>>everything in language and censorship:  "You can prick your finger,
>>>but you can't finger your [prick]."
>
>>Which actually reminds me of another Letterman censorship moment:
>>Gerson Koenig
>>gmkoenig@acsu.buffalo.edu
>
>    Paul's loose lips were best described by Lorraine Newman (formerly of
> Sat.Nt.Live.  During a bit about Mideval Musicians, Paul was playing a
> 'band' leader.  The whole group was constantly using a substitute word 
> for fuck, perhaps 'fargin'...i forget.  Anyway Lorraine tells that on
> live TV paul let slip with 'Fuckin'.  She said the whole offset cast froze
> while staring at the censor, who was stricken...he had missed bleeping
> it and it had gone past.  Lorraine said nothing was ever heard of it
> but Paul gets the credit for letting fly.
>
>--
>
>  tim                 mik.uky.edu          Tim  Huesman
>

The operative word was floggin' and I believe Micheal Palin was the host. Seems like
a funny/gross skit about Palin as the main character in "Kidnapped" - his job was to
empty his master's drool cup into the drool bucket and pour that into the drool sluice
that fed the drool canal (you get the picture).
And now back to Dave:
Remember when they were censoring the word "johnson" from the show? Dave and Paul had
a blast with that one for weeks. BTW, they are now allowed to say "johnson".
From: gmkoenig@acsu.buffalo.edu (Gerson V Koenig)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: Stupid pet tricks
Date: 8 Sep 92 00:42:26 GMT
Organization: UB

kachun@spot.Colorado.EDU (Ka Chun Yu) writes:
>Forgot about this one.  But that segment was bested by the sequel in the
>recent anniversary show when the dogs herded sheep down the auditorium and
>into a waiting taxi cab.

Boasting time (a small boast though it is). I managed to get tickets to the
10th anniversary show of which you speak, and on the way out of Radio City,
my brother and I passed the taxi cab still holding the sheep! (Told you it
was a small boast.)

>-- 
>*Ka Chun Yu               * "Deputy dog dog a ding dang depa depa deputy     *
>*kachun@spot.Colorado.EDU *  dog dog a ding dang depa depa . . ."            *

Gerson Koenig
gmkoenig@acsu.buffalo.edu
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
From: drice@ponder.csci.unt.edu (Keith Rice)
Subject: Re: Dave's trips out.
Keywords: Dave, trips, out
Organization: University of North Texas
Distribution: usa
Date: Tue, 8 Sep 1992 05:34:42 GMT

In <1992Sep7.181434.20512@news.iastate.edu> jsturges@iastate.edu (Jason L Sturges) writes:

> If I remember right, how about the one where Dave visits other shows in 
>progress in the studio complex.  After all, he's not the only show that's
>going on at that time.  I believe he entered a news service?  Talked the
                                                ^^^^^^^^^^^^
That was "Live at Five" with Al Roker the weatherman.

>weather guy into letting him do the weather?  Dave used to forecast weather, 
>you know... gotta chance to see him one time... it was great!

>							-- Jason Sturges

--
D. Keith Rice -- University of North Texas -- drice@ponder.csci.unt.edu
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
(new .sig under construction)
From: mcirvin@husc8.harvard.edu (Mcirvin)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: WHATS WRONG WITH THE SHOW
Date: 8 Sep 92 00:42:01 GMT

music@erich.triumf.ca (FRED W. BACH) writes:

>       Generally I find
>       the humor a problem on the Letterman show, however.  I think it
>       is often too silly and aimed at a much more childish mind.

I have a friend who once described Chevy Chase's basic act as
"pretending to be pretending to be pretending to be funny."  That's
the way it is with Letterman's humor:  it's sophomoric stuff that
seems to be, in some indefinable way, layered with about twelve
levels of self-parody.  I find it almost unbearably hilarious most
of the time.

The same friend was once a huge fan of Letterman and then suddenly
declared him to be symptomatic of the general decline of society,
and refused to watch the show any more.  I think he overdosed on
irony, and decided that the loss of sincerity inherent in Dave's
humor wasn't worth any comedic effect that might ensue.  I
disagree.  Basically I think there's a need for outrageous
slapstick and grade-school gags, at least for people like me,
and if the only way we can self-respectingly get it is in an
extremely self-conscious mode like "Late Night," so be it.

Besides, dammit, I demand to be entertained.

-- 
Matt McIrvin, Cambridge, Massachusetts, USA
From: ccmei@ada.seas.ucla.edu (Carl C. Mei)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: Favorite things...
Date: 9 Sep 92 18:04:46 GMT
Distribution: usa
Organization: SEASnet, University of California, Los Angeles

In article <1992Sep7.004254.23663@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> eodell@nyx.cs.du.edu (Eugene O'Dell) writes:
>
>     I think one of my favorite shows was were a magician guy came out
>doing his thing, and Dave was constantly making fun of him...  At one 
>point, Dave saw how one of the tricks worked, and shared his new found
>knowledge with the audience, which embarrassed (and pissed off) the 
>magician.  Truly funny.

Are you speaking of Kmar, the Discount Magician?  (Everytime I say
that name I have to giggle)  I agree that his appearances are always
funny, not because his acts are good or anything, but because of the
contraptions the magician always puts on Dave for his tricks.  I
remember this once when Kmar strapped Dave's head and hands into a
guillotine, and the trick involved dropping this blade on his neck.
The guillotine was too small, and Dave had to bend over in order to
put his head through the hole.  Kmar had a tough time strapping Dave
in, and Dave had a tough time staying in that position.  I don't
remember if Dave cracked any jokes, but just the image of them
struggling with the prop had me in stitches.  The trick worked, but by
that time I was laughing so hard it didn't matter.  =)

By the way, can someone confirm that Dave named him the "Discount
Magician" because his name sounds like K-mart?

Carl
From: dcohen@whistle.Berkeley.EDU (David S. Cohen)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Late Night Writer discusses "Layman's Corner"
Date: 5 Sep 1992 10:56:12 GMT
Organization: University of California at Berkeley
NNTP-Posting-Host: whistle.berkeley.edu

Hello everybody.  My name is Paul, and I used to be a writer at Late
Night. I'm using a friend's account right now, and he showed me this
Late Night section.

"Layman's Corner" was a piece I co-wrote with Rob Burnett in my first
year at the show. The woman in the piece was Jude Brennan, who is now
the show's producer since Morty moved up to co-executive producer.

When we wrote the piece, we had another LNDL writer -- Gerry Mulligan
-- in mind to do the part.  Then again, we also hoped the piece would
become a regular feature, but Layman's Corner never caught on, because
it sort of sucked.

By the way, if you enjoy Late Night, you'll love "The Larry Sanders
Show" on HBO, which is where I work now.  It's a show about what
things are really like behind the scenes at a late-night talk show.
An added bonus: in an upcoming episode, LNDL co-exec producer Morty
appears, playing himself.

- PRS

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

NOTE:  	PLEASE DO NOT RESPOND BY E-MAIL TO THIS POSTING.  THIS
	IS NOT PAUL'S ACCOUNT.

THANKS,

- David
From: conibear@sol.carleton.ca (Dave Conibear)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: Fave Dave Quotes
Date: 6 Sep 92 19:40:08 GMT
Organization: Carleton University

My all-time fave:

   "Nicely packed, bag boy!"

Yet another Dave
From: unknown@ucscb.UCSC.EDU (tuu)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Stupid HUMAN Tricks
Date: 7 Sep 1992 07:52:35 GMT
Organization: University of California; Santa Cruz
Distribution: world
NNTP-Posting-Host: ucscb.ucsc.edu



	Well, the best stupid HUMAN trick, and stupid is the operative
word, was the following:

	A guy comes on, puts a styrofoam cup filled with water on the floor
and a ring of liquid that's on fire around it. Then he gets up on a desk
and 'dives' off (going into basically a push-up position I think), and smashes
the cup with his head.

	It really can't be described. It's one of those things that's so
stupid it's funny.. and he got on TV for that.. sheesh.
-- 
/unknown@ucscb.ucsc.edu   used ADB trackball WANTED          Apple II Forever!\
\Mail me:Get INFOCOM GAMES RERELEASED for //s, ULT VI GS done,for UNIX GS info/
What the world needs now is another folk singer like I need a hole in my head.
From: edc@dna.bchs.uh.edu
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: Cams
Date: 10 Sep 92 18:21:11 GMT
Organization: University of Houston

In article <1992Sep10.002746.9609@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> bscott@nyx.cs.du.edu  
(Ben Scott) writes:
> In article <1992Sep3.203333.7432@oct17.dfe.dec.com>  
chaban@fortsc.enet.dec.com (Ed Chaban) writes:
> >In article <1992Sep2.231920.7362@ucsu.Colorado.EDU>,  
kachun@spot.Colorado.EDU (Ka Chun Yu) writes...
> >>Has anyone compiled a list of all of the special "cams" that have appeared  
on
> >>the show?  There was of course the famous Monkey-Cam, the Thrill-Cam, and  
the
> >>short-lived Tiger-Cam (which immediatley proceeded to maul Paul).  Wasn't  
there
> >
> >My personal favorite was the "Sewer Cam"
> 
> MY favorite was the chair-cam - it appeared on Chris Elliot's short-lived
> little spinoff talk-show which he set up with a few chairs in the open part
> of the stage area.  I think it ran for about 3 minutes a night, for less
> than a week, but he had his own guests (real ones), and a little audience
> area.  Anyway, he had a camera mounted in a chair facing upwards, which
> would be cut to at various appropriate moments (in fact, once the guest
> sitting down was Edward Woodward!).
> 
> What was the name of Chris' show, anyway?

"Night Light", with Chris Elliot.  A real laff riot.  The first time Dave
introduced it, he mentioned how NBC were using this "show within a show"
concept on other programs, and he pulls up a dummy photo of Tom Brokaw and
ALF doing the NBC Nightly News.

<ESC>
--
..You either kiss the future or the past goodbye...
                          -- Ringo Starr (written by O'Deherty / Velez)
From: tclark@Apple.COM (Tom Clark)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: Dennis Miller on the Emmys
Date: 10 Sep 92 23:49:15 GMT
Organization: Apple Computer Inc., Cupertino, CA

In article <1992Sep2.035947.27735@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> ahawks@nyx.cs.du.edu (barbara bush on crack) writes:
>In article <1992Sep2.032207.26466@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> mperlman@nyx.cs.du.edu (Marshal "Airborne" Perlman) writes:
>
>|Miller SUCKS.
>|
>|Prime example:
>|
>|Letterman has a TV show..and has for last few years.
>|Miller had SNL and a "TV THING" for a few weeks.
>|
>|Miller is FUNNY as Newsboy..but that is it.
>
>
>Anyway, Dennis Miller was cancelled because he has a brain, he appeals
>to an intelligent audience - people that think while waching tv, not
 
Yeah, unfortunately he was too stupid to tell his writers that the shit they
came up with for his show was completely lame.

>And wasn't David Letterman great at hosting the Emmies?  And wasn't he
>great at hosting the Mtv Movie awards?  
>

Dave isn't a hollywood weasel who would suck anyone's dick in order to be 
seen by the kind of morons who watch those events.

>
>--
> ahawks@nyx.cs.du.edu   FutureCulture E-List: [future-request@nyx.cs.du.edu]
> andy (hawkeye)         new edge, technoculture, cyberpunk, virtual reality,
>                        raves, etc. Home of the famous :) FutureCulture FAQ!
> 

Tom
From: ccmei@turing.seas.ucla.edu (Carl C. Mei)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Dave's trips out.
Date: 6 Sep 92 05:00:42 GMT
Distribution: usa
Organization: SEASnet, University of California, Los Angeles

One of my favorite parts of the show, other than Viewer Mail, is when
Dave would pretend to leave to studio to go on these little trips.
One of my favorite was when Dave and a whole bunch of the staff went
to International House of Pancakes.  Al Mahr used syrup to comb his
hair, Dave carved out a world map of pancakes, and he played catch
with Paul where Paul was catching the pancakes with his mouth.
Hilarious.  Anyone with your favorites?

"I'm 6-6, 280!"

Carl

Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
From: gurgle@netcom.com (Pete Gontier)
Subject: Re: Live sucks!
Date: Mon, 07 Sep 92 23:51:41 GMT
Organization: cellular

v133kdq8@ubvmsd.cc.buffalo.edu (Amy L Levine) writes:

>For those of you who don't live in the vicinity of New York City and are 
>thinking of making a little trip to the big apple solely for the purpose of
>seeing the show live and in person, the following is a warning.

You, my dear, are what's known locally as a pooty-head. Phbbbt! I made the
grand trek myself all the way from L.A., and without tickets, arrived
at the RCA Building (as it was then known) at 4 am and waited the rest of
the night for stand-by tickets, which were distributed at 9 am. I then
re-appeared circa 5pm and landed in the front row on left aisle because
I was alone and could be placed anywhere to fill a seat. The guy in the
wheelchair next to me leaned over after the show and said "Watch this --
whenever I go to a taping, the staff fall all over each other to shower
my acquaintances with gifts." And they did! I got a folding cup, an
exploding sponge, and one of the Magic Blue Cards, to be precise, the
"2nd Half Billboard", which now hangs framed in my bathroom.

>Actually, I'm still pissed off that the Dennis Miller Show was canceled.

You don't have to be pissed off about this to the exclusion of Letterman
fandom. THAT would be a travesty. If you were a Letterman fan as well,
you wouldn't have missed Miller's guest appearance on the show a few
nights back.

>When they stop, the announcer guy (I can't think of his name at the
>moment...

Bill Wendel! Remember it and live better! Honestly, did you expect any
credibility here without doing your homework?

>I also suspect that the laughter that you hear is on a tape (gasp!).

Wrongo! I made noises during my taping that I heard in the broadcast.

>Once the monologue is over and the commercials are put in, Dave 
>moseys on over to his desk and you think that now you'll be able to see
>something.  Wrong again!  About four cameras move right in on him and all you
>can see are the fat asses of the camera crew.

Obviously the product of living in NYC and relying on tickets obtained
by mail after waiting years on a waiting list.

>  Now, I guess the show could be ok if you get good guests.

Wrong again! The show is not called "Late Night with Good Guests"!

>Garland Jefferys (a pretty bad R & B artist that nobody's heard of),

Tell that to the blues groups on the net. Shaffer doesn't pick 'em at
random. Do you think they *have* to take acts with lesser sales figures?
-- 
 Pete Gontier // EC Technology // gurgle@netcom.com
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
From: dwdyer@polari.online.com
Subject: Re: "Latka freaking out"...
Keywords: latka, who else
Organization: Seattle Online Public Access Unix.  (206) 328-4944 (all lines telebit-equipped)
Date: Fri, 4 Sep 1992 01:38:47 GMT

bbrown@infonode.ingr.com (Bailey Brown) writes:

>christ@cie.uoregon.edu (Christian G. Smith) writes:

[skads deleted here and there]

>>  MY QUESTION to those skilled enough to answer it:
>>  
>>  Why was he so upset at the guy?  It looks real because Andy, who
>>is wearing a neck brace, calls the guy a motherfucker or somesuch 
>>then throws Dave's coffee at him.  I'd really love to see the episode,
>>but if anyone who has seen it can shed light on it, I'd just crap
>>in happiness.


>I believe this happend during Andy Kaufman's "wrestling" period.

Very true.

>wrestler injured Kaufman's neck.  Many people thought that Kaufman was 
>expecting a fake match and was not prepared for a real match.  Anyway, I 
>think this pirate-looking dude was the wrestler Jerry Lawler and that 
>Kaufman was mad at him because he had put Kaufman in the neck brace.

What I understood was that the whole thing was pre-arranged between Kaufman
and Lawler (watch the tape...the punches are staged...) but they didn't tell
Letterman anything.  So, Letterman reacted naturally.  SOrt of like the
Crispin Glover affair, and I'm not sure I beleive Glover's look-alike story,
but that's a different thread....

-- 
                 Wayne Dyer --- dwdyer@polari.online.com  
  "I mistrust all systematizers and I avoid them. The will to a system
      is a lack of integrity."  -Nietzsche, _Twilight of the Idols_
From: cyrman@wpi.WPI.EDU (Christopher David Cyr)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Dave's Playboy Interview?
Date: 11 Sep 1992 06:10:50 GMT
Organization: Worcester Polytechnic Institute
NNTP-Posting-Host: wpi.wpi.edu


	Tonight on the show (Thursday, 9/10), Dave was talking to Siskel and
Ebert about the fact that he has done a Playboy interview.  Anyone know the
month/year of the issue he was in?

cyrman@wpi.wpi.edu
From: wallich@ncd.com (Ken Wallich)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: Kelly Robin Wilcoxin (sp?)
Date: 14 Sep 92 20:33:30 GMT
Reply-To: wallich@ncd.com (Ken Wallich)

acbonin@unix.amherst.edu (ADAM CRAIG BONIN) writes:

  In pirate voice, he yelled something like "Aye, we've got to fasten
  the mainsail, or Kelly Robin Wilcoxin!"  Maybe it's just me.  Anyone
  else remember the show?  Am I alone in appreciating these riffs?

Well, actually, I've not been particularly fond of most of them.  Having
Dave shout something like "Wonder Bread!", every few minutes just doesn't
tickle the old funny bone.

On the other hand, this particular one did have me rolling out of bed
several times that night.  I think the "pirate" incarnation was the
best of them.

--
Ken Wallich
wallich@ncd.com  
ken@wallich.com
From: v125qmam@ubvmsb.cc.buffalo.edu (Ami R Pflugrad)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Fav. Letterman Moment
Date: 6 Sep 92 22:31:00 GMT
Organization: University at Buffalo
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41




Who can forget this one...

	The lady brings out the two monkeys all dressed up in dresses.  and 
the one keeps attacking Dave.  The continuing banter between the monkey and 
Letterman had me SCREAMING for hours.  I still break out laughing when I 
think about it now...


Ahhh Yes... truly a classic moment in television history.
From: ph111-bx@violet.berkeley.edu (;;;;7202)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: If Dave moves, all the band comes with, right?
Date: 8 Sep 1992 03:22:51 GMT
Organization: University of California, Berkeley
NNTP-Posting-Host: violet.berkeley.edu

In article <1992Sep8.011517.24582@colorado.edu> rpb@noaacrd.colorado.edu
(Robert Baptist) writes:
>   Does anyone remember when Dave introduced Paul and he started talking
>about his mother and called her an expletive?  Later in the show, 
>Dave called her up and told her to watch.. Does anyone recall exactly
>what Paul said?

Paul was speaking of eating dinner with his parents and said something
like, "You bitch, you ruined my life, I mean please pass the salt."
When Letterman calls up Paul's mother to repeat this, he makes some
grammatical error when he first starts talking to her.  Paul's mother,
a retired teacher, corrects him, Letterman starts banging the receiver
on his desk as he is wont, Paul says something like "That's my mother"
and Letterman says something like "I see what you mean."

Someone who has this on tape or remembers it better may want to correct this.
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
From: keith@cco.caltech.edu (Keith Allan Schneider)
Subject: Jay Leno's whooping
Organization: California Institute of Technology, Pasadena
Date: Wed, 9 Sep 1992 07:12:06 GMT


If Jay Leno makes that stupid whooping noise again, I think I'll send him
a mail bomb.

keith
From: mcirvin@husc8.harvard.edu (Mcirvin)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: Letterman letter
Date: 14 Sep 92 04:17:01 GMT

thomasc@ms.uky.edu (Thomas Campbell) writes:

>Btw:  Dave might just make fun of us.. but, I don't have a problem with 
>that.... 

I thought that was the POINT!  It would be lovely if he did.  

>   The below signed are on what's called the "Internet" also known
>as the "UseNet".

In the interest of accuracy (like it matters), the two are not
synonymous.  When you send Internet email you are not using Usenet,
but you are using Internet.
-- 
Matt McIrvin, Cambridge, Massachusetts, USA
From: jtchern@ocf.berkeley.edu (Joseph Hernandez)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Dave at the Ballpark
Date: 9 Sep 92 16:29:30 GMT
Organization: U. C. Berkeley Open Computing Facility

The coolest thing thing happened last night. I was attending the San Diego
Padres vs. San Francisco Giants baseball game at Candlestick Park. Since it
seemed like no team wanted to win, they went into extra innings. In the
time between team at-bats during the 14th inning about 12:05 am (PT), the 
scoreboard message read "Let's Join 'Late Night With David Letterman'"
And wallah, it was Dave on the big diamondvision screen in centerfield! They
only showed it when the players were warming up between innings though. It
was still a pleasant surprise because they did it between every inning until
the game ended. Too bad the stupid Giants had to win in the 16th about 15
minutes before the show did.

Joe
-- 
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
            Joseph TeleCommunications Enterprises World Headquarters
*****  *****  *****  jtchern@ocf.Berkeley.EDU          jtcent@soda.Berkeley.EDU
    *    *    *      jhernand@nyx.cs.DU.EDU                    josephhz@IDS.NET
    *    *    *      cb085@cleveland.Freenet.EDU      jph@m-net.ann-arbor.MI.US
*****    *    *****  University of California, Berkeley, California, USA  94720
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: hennessy@acsu.buffalo.edu (Mathew A. Hennessy)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
Subject: Re: Gifts to audience members
Date: 11 Sep 92 18:16:25 GMT
Distribution: usa
Organization: UB


	While the home office was still in PA, he would give out pounds of
kielbasa or bacon.. also beef I think


-- 
   /I\          Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke.
  /(*)\         hennessy@acsu.buffalo.edu                 
 /IIIII\        
/IIIIIII\       Give me SLACK or give me food (or kill me).
Newsgroups: alt.fan.letterman
From: drice@ponder.csci.unt.edu (Keith Rice)
Subject: Re: "Or, as we say in Indiana,"
Keywords: eat more moose
Organization: University of North Texas
Distribution: usa
Date: Fri, 11 Sep 1992 06:29:50 GMT

In <18pa7dINNott@agate.berkeley.edu> bbehlen@soda.berkeley.edu (Vitamin B (Brian Behlendorf)) writes:

>In article <1992Sep10.185016.12224@tamsun.tamu.edu> rlopez@loanstar.tamu.edu (Robert Lopez) writes:
>>In article <18n0a0INNa87@agate.berkeley.edu>, ajay@miro.Berkeley.EDU (Ajay Sreekanth) writes:
>>|> I can remember "spay-shel" (for "special"), "noo-cular" (for "nuclear")
>>|> and "sa-tistic" (for "statistic"). 

>	Actually, isn't it "sadistic" for "satistic"?

No, its "satistic".

--
D. Keith Rice -- University of North Texas -- drice@ponder.csci.unt.edu
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