From: skye@brewich.hou.tx.us (Skye Stryder)
Newsgroups: alt.pagan
Subject: Re: Reconciling BDSM and Pagan Beliefs
Date: Thu, 05 Nov 92 10:30:26 CST
Organization: The Brewers' Witch BBS, +1 713 272 7350, Brewich.Hou.TX.US

> HOWEVER, and this is a big however, sado-masochism/bondage etc.
> seems to me to be yet another mangled modern version of an ancient
> mystical ritual. The power you speak of is there, with or without
> the trappings of bonds or punishment tools or inflicted pain.
> 
> You say that for you, primal sexuality involves playing with power.
> Fine. My question is: could you have seen the Horned God as your
> UNBOUND body writhed under your lover's? If not, why not? Why do you
> need to be made helpless in order to comprehend the full glory of
> this power?
> 
> To me the joy in the game of sex is the FREEDOM to give and take
> that power.  It seems that for modern Western culture, "power"
> often means "power over another," which bums me out because power
> just is, it flows in each of us, and there is more than enough for
> everyone.  I don't have to take away someone else's power in order
> to flex my own.  And it seems to me that the power may be enjoyed
> more fully when both parties are feeling it, sharing it, and acting
> as equals in a dance which ranges from gentle to rough to
> animalistic and back to tender again.
> 
> Another problem I have with sado-masochism/bondage/etc. is that it
> smacks (ha ha) just a little too much of pornography in its most
> damaging form. The myths that women love powerlessness, love pain,
> say no but mean yes, and enjoy rape, are just too powerful and too
> pervasive in this culture for me to enjoy playing that role. I feel
> that it would be reinforcing that stereotype yet again -- and
> playing that game, even in private, has meaning.
> 
> My personal and political and spiritual interpretations of S&M are
> not meant to flame anyone or degrade their own experiences. But I do
> believe that the deeper implications are often rationalized or
> ignored. It's definitely something to think about, because sex IS
> important, and tremendously meaningful. But our society (magazines,
> films, music, etc.) has trivialized it to the point that we treat it
> with a casualness that is downright dangerous.
> 
> Whew! Let's all lighten up and go have an orgy. (Just kidding.
> Really)
> 
> =gwyn
> 
> ps: thoughtful replies welcomed, flames ignored!!


Hi gwyn,

This is a topic near to my heart.  My partner and I are inclined towards 
sm/bd in our relationship upon occasion.  We find it empowering in two 
ways (there are more, but I'm not writing a thesis).  First, as women, it 
is empowering to take up the role of control and the giving of pain.  As 
human beings, it is also empowering to (with good reason) to trust one's 
partner enough to allow her to take control and give pain.  Pain and 
control are tools to build intensity in sex.  Neither one of us are 
sexually dysfunctional and orgasm is a given in our sexual dealings.  We 
find that the ritualistic aspects of sm/bd enhance the intensity of the 
experience and strengthen the bond we already share.

The potential for magic in the s/m ritual is very great.  I would say 
that in my relationship the magic involved is very definitely white magic 
because the emphasis is on trust.  There is no "better than" involved, 
merely an assignment of roles in the ritual, each as important as the 
other.  An unwilling participant would void the magic, or turn it to 
black.  A breach of trust (going too far with the dominance, or the 
submissive manipulating the dominant against her will) would void the 
magic.

Like paganism, s/m is associated with evil and the devil in the minds of 
narrow-minded people.  Paganism is heresy, which in our secular society 
has lost a lot of its sting as a sin.  Sadomasochism is perversion, which 
in our sex-preoccupied society retains a lot of negative associations.

As in all things, the path of balance works best for most people.  
Anything taken to obsessive levels can be harmful.

Skye


------------------
skye@brewich.hou.tx.us (Skye Stryder)
Origin: The Brewers' Witch BBS -- Houston, TX -- +1 713 272 7350
     "Silence is the voice of complicity" - Vote Early, Vote Often!
Newsgroups: alt.pagan