From: jgacker@news.gsfc.nasa.gov (James G. Acker)
Subject: B&B:  The usual pathos
Organization: NASA Goddard Space Flight Center - Greenbelt, MD USA
X-Newsreader: TIN [version 1.1 PL6]
Date: Tue, 5 Jan 1993 19:43:42 GMT



     A remarkable new development will be found at the end
of this update.

     Unfortunately, a dull day at the corral.  Day two of
the baby's life and we don't have a name yet.  Will Brooke
choose a name before the father is determined?  (Note:  The
name 'Stephanie' has been posted with 1000-to-1 odds at an
oddsmaker in London.  Place your bets.)

     Monday on "The Bold and the Beautiful"

     YOU'RE A COOL CUCUMBER, AND YOU'RE IN A PICKLE

     Jack, visiting Taylor, gets the lowdown and the scoop
on the special delivery Brooke was making at the cabin.
Taylor says on one level I just had to be a doctor, and tell
Ridge what to do.  But aren't you worried about Ridge and
Brooke?  Of course, Taylor says, as a psychologist I know
that participating in the delivery of a baby can be a
profoundly bonding experience for mommy, daddy, and the
tyke.  But Ridge promised me at the Christmas party (just
before we played "Do you love me, surfer girl" poolside)
that nothing, nada, zip, zilch, including Brooke's baby or a
babe with more giganda hooters than me, would ever endanger
our marriage!   Jack's impressed, because he can vouch for
Taylor's assets (accountant humor!  HA!).  He's impressed
that she's super-cool considering the circumstances.  The
phone doth ring.  She is informed that the Medivac
helicopter is enroute to Mulholland.  She grabs her purse
and boogies for the hospital.

     ANOTHER CONFIRMATION FOR SHEILA'S WORST FEARS

     Sheila visits a haggard Eric at the condo.  He's been
up all night, he explains, waiting for word about Brooke and
Ridge.  He tells her the current situation -- Brooke in
labor, snowed in, and Ridge can't even tie a square knot!
He's really worried.  But they should be able to get them
out this morning, he tells her.  Well, that means that the
paternity test will have to wait, right?  Sheila asks.  Why
wait?  All we need is a blood test for comparison.  Sheila
puts on her "uh-oh" face.  She inquires as to how he's
feeling.  He always thought he'd be at the delivery -- after
all, Brooke is his WIFE.  He really wants to know if Brooke
is all right and how the baby is, and whose the baby is.
Sheila hugs him and tells him she has to run an "error".
Er, errand.  As she goes to the door, Eric bids her adieu.
She deduces from his words and expressions that if the baby
is his, he won't leave Brooke.  Outside the door, she says
it and says she can't let that happen.


THEM'S THE RULES:  BREAK 'EM, AND I BREAK YOU

     Now at the hospital in her nurses uniform, Sheila finds
Tracy (the genetics and all-around superdoc).  Tracy is
surprised she's there -- they're fully staffed today.
Sheila's checking up on one patient.  She's been thinking --
volunteering is fine, but Tracy has piqued her interest in
the genetics lab.  Could she work there?  Tracy says I don't
think so, but we hire new techs all the time, so apply.  Not
exactly what I had in mind, because I can't give up my job
at Forrester and my sauna access.  How about volunteering in
the lab?  Tracy thinks about it and says maybe, but you have
to go through the same security clearance procedure as an
employee.  EXTENSIVE background check, minute examination of
every line on your resume, phone calls to ex-husbands, etc.
Sheila goes snow white, knowing her resume reads like the
Evil Queen.  Plus Lizzie Borden, Mrs. Sundance, Cruella
D'ville, Princess Fergie, Alexis Carrington Colby Dexter
etc., and Xaviera Hollander.   How long would it fake, I
mean take, to go through a security check?  she asks.  3-4
weeks.  Oh.  Suddenly, the helicopter arrives -- it's Brooke
with the baby!  Tracy goes to assist.  Sheila realizes,
while looking at the GENETICS LAB sign, that 1) she'd never
pass the security check, and 2) she has to get in the lab
very, very soon.
     Post-exam, Sheila is awaiting Tracy.  One more
question, Doc -- considering my qualifications and my
eagerness, couldn't I start helping you sooner than 3-4
weeks.  Sorry, Charlie, but not every tuna gets to be
Starkist Tuna.  And genetics testing is serious business, so
you have to play by the rules.  And that's the way it is.
Tracy leaves, Sheila glowers.

     BONDING FASTER THAN SUPER-GLUE TO A BROKEN PLATE

     At the cabin, Brooke wraps the babe in swaddling
clothes and lays her in a ... bathrobe, while Ridge checks
the clearing weather.  They sit together, glowing.  Ridge
says she did a great job, and she tells him that she's
really glad he was there.   She's a real mess, she says.  He
says she's glowing.  She's lucky he made it to the cabin and
helped with the delivery.  I had to, Ridge explains --
she'll always be a part of his life.  He can't believe it --
first there was two of them, and now there's this baby.  I
mean, where'd that come from?    Brooke tells him that
they've been through so much, he's her friend, was her
lover, and now they've shared this -- he doesn't have to
respond, but  (as Ridge holds the baby) she's never felt
closer to him than now, and she LOVES him.  Ridge looks in
her eyes deeply, deeply, deeply as the helicopter motors
over the mountainside.  He goes to clear a place in the
snow, looks back at Brooke holding the baby and becomes
thoughtful.
     At the hospital, Brooke is in a robe, and in bed, and
Ridge asks how she's doing, gets her a glass of water.  She
asks the doctor where her baby is, and they're just
finishing up tests.  The doc (not Tracy) leaves.  Brooke
doesn't want it to end -- when they were up at the cabin,
they were like the only three people in the world.  Ridge
comes around, and Brooke comes up to him, and they cling
together, hugging.
     At this moment, Taylor quietly opens the door (nobody
ever knock in a hospital, right?)  and looks in, seeing
Ridge and Brooke hugging and holding, and looks just a
trifle bit concerned.

     Tune in tomorrow, when Sheila asks:

     "Just who is the dishwasher in in the genetics lab,
anyway?


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|  James G. Acker                       Occasional Genius  |
|  jgacker@neptune.gsfc.nasa.gov        Regular Swimmer    |
|                                                          |
|  "Animal-based research in this field ignores the fact   |
|  that in humans much sexual behavior has little to do    |
|  with reproduction both psychologically and physio-      |
|  logically..."                                           |
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