HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: tlode@isis.cs.du.edu (trygve lode)
Subject: Re: Sanctity of relationships
X-Disclaimer: Nyx is a public access Unix system run by the University
	of Denver for the Denver community.  The University has neither
	control over nor responsibility for the opinions of users.
Organization: Nyx, Public Access Unix at U. of Denver Math/CS dept.
Distribution: usa
Date: Fri, 10 Apr 92 17:25:55 GMT

In article <1992Apr10.135020.14644@cbfsb.cb.att.com> jjd1@cbnewsg.cb.att.com (james.j.dutton) writes:
>In article <1992Apr10.062723.24391@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> tlode@isis.cs.du.edu (trygve lode) writes:
>>
>>However, regardless of the situation, if someone is wooing my partner with
>>my partner's encouragement, then that someone is not behaving in an
>>immoral fashion (tacky, possibly, but not immoral), and any problem that
>>this causes between me and my partner is between us and needs to be
>>resolved between us.
>>
>>Trygve
> 
>Try I don't want to alarm you but I totally agree with this outlook. Well
>said as usual. Of course a flame sprinkled here and there for spice might
>have been nice. Gotta run not havin fun. Later gator. After awhile
>crocodile.

Aiiigh!
Xref: sparky alt.romance:6803 soc.singles:10740 soc.couples:1979
From: stef@Apple.COM (Stef Jones)
Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.singles,soc.couples
Subject: Re: Sanctity of relationships
Date: 8 Apr 92 20:05:32 GMT
Distribution: world,soc
Organization: Apple Computer Inc., Cupertino, CA

In article <1992Apr7.005929.11543@vax5.cit.cornell.edu> rnjx@vax5.cit.cornell.edu writes:
>The question is this.  Is it ever morally and/or ethically O.K. to actively
>try to woo one member of an existing relationship from that relationship so
>that you may start one with her/him?  Under what circumstances?  How about
>pursuing someone who's engaged?  Where do you all draw the line?  If it isn't
>O.K., would you still do it anyway?
>
I suppose that there are circumstances where it would be OK to do it,
but I would never do it. The closest I would come would be to try to
start a close friendship with the person. It's not that I have a moral
problem with it but simply that I have absolutely no interest in 
attempting to woo someone away from their SO. Maybe I just don't like
competition. Maybe I wouldn't trust someone who'd leave their SO for
someone else (they might do the same to me, right?). Also, I have a
problem with trying to influence someone to do something unless they
have specifically asked me for advice.


>#  RNJX@vax5.cit.cornell.edu                                 #             
>#  Jeff Wilson                                               #

--    
                  A more intimate theology, and one more consonant with 
Stef              the nature of...love, pictures a demonic force engaged  
stef@apple.com    in continuous creation and participation. - Iris Murdoch
From: bicker@cbnewsi.cb.att.com (The Resource, Poet-Magician of Quality)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Staying friends with your SO
Date: 7 Apr 92 14:03:27 GMT
Reply-To: Brian.C.Kohn@att.com (The Resource, Poet-Magician of Quality)
Followup-To: alt.romance
Organization: The Internet


I know I've mentioned this before, but for those who missed that:
My two best friends are my RP, and former RP, and the whole situation
works out just dandy.  I attribute this mostly to the trust my RP
Robbie has in me, and her maturity and self-confidence level.  She also
has met my former RP and they get along well, and that helps.

It's great having her around to be the sounding board for my
relationship problems: she knows me as well as anyone, and better than
my brothers who'd I otherwise have to turn to for help, and she's a
woman so she can fill in that gap in my knowledge of the world.  (I
suppose if I had a sister, that would satisfy that need.)  She, in
turn, expresses her frustrations to me, and I try to help as much as I
can, from my position as someone who truly cares about her happiness.

How great it would be to have a double wedding. :>

-- 
Brian Charles Kohn             AT&T Bell Laboratories Quality Process Center
ISO Certified Lead Assessor    E-MAIL: att!hoqax!bicker  (bicker@hoqax.ATT.COM)
    'Hope, not fear, is the most positive advocate of action.' - S.R. Lawhead
                   Stamp Out "SO": "RP" = "Romantic Partner"
Xref: sparky alt.romance:7109 alt.romance.chat:9868
From: RJD118@psuvm.psu.edu
Newsgroups: alt.romance,alt.romance.chat
Subject: Re: Is this a common thing?
Date: 15 Apr 92 14:00:50 GMT
 <1992Apr15.071538.4045@pony.Ingres.COM>
Organization: Penn State University

I want to clear a few things up...stuff I hadn't realized could be misread/
assumed/mistaken.
First and foremost...There is some serious commitment between Jenn and I.
We have known each other for six months as good, almost best friends. We
could talk about ANYTHING to each other. We have very strong feelings for
each other [we are in LOVE...believe it!] and we are 'feeling our way through'
our relationship right now. Talking mostly about our feelings, our attitudes,
our differences. Yeah, we touched on them before we started dating, but now
we are going in depth...and it's a good thing. We trust each other....and I
have great difficulty in trusting people, but she's got all of mine... :)
The reason she asked the question about pregnancy was that she had a "close
call" about a year before I met her...and the guy just cut her off as soon
as she told him about the possibility. She wasn't pregnant, just a few days
late, but he still wanted nothing to do with her. And she had NO idea he
would react that way. That's why she wanted to know my reaction to the same
situation...she doesn't want anything to get between us, y'know? If an
uwanted pregnancy would kill the relationship, she wants to know beforehand.
And she knows that, despite how I feel about it, there's no guarantee...but
a limited warranty helps...:) !!
Thanks, everyone, for tossing me the input.
It is greatly appreciated.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
I_________________________I         Redneck!    The Official Lumberjack
I\***********************/I                     and Woodgatherer of the
                                                          RFA
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: cfg@cray.com (Cindy F. Glass)
Subject: Re: LOVE sucks. No question about it.
Organization: Cray Research, Inc.
Distribution: usa
Date: 15 Apr 92 17:12:09 CDT

In article <1992Apr14.181916.15190@thdhub.UUCP> tjg01@thdhub.UUCP (Terry Gardner) writes:
>praetzel@tesla.waterloo.edu (praetzel@tesla.waterloo.edu) writes:
>: In article <1992Mar31.222556.26258@cbnewse.cb.att.com>, hjanssen@cbnewse.cb.att.com (hank janssen) writes:
>: Yup.  It sucks.  Do yourself a favor and give it up before it kills you.
>
>Only if you're lucky....
>-- 
>Terry Gardner, terry@thdhub, terry%thdhub@uunet
>Senior Network Systems Programmer @ The Home Depot, Inc.
>404-433-8211 x 5124 Message Generated with GNU Emacs 18.58...
>Aborting, Retrying, Failing, and Ignoring.....


AND just WHERE did you come up with this lil - ole - phrase darlin'!?!?

Cindy
From: wilms5839@iscsvax.uni.edu
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: need feedback
Date: 14 Apr 92 23:09:57 -0500
Organization: University of Northern Iowa

Hi. I'm in need of some feedback on a situation I have gotten myself into. 
I have found a wonderful man up here at the university. He is smart,
considerate, jokes alot, has a wonderful personality, is easy to talk to and is
witty. The problem is that he is a senior and graduates in 4 weeks. I on the
other hand am a freshman and have at least 3 and 1/2 years to go yet. I have
been the victim of bad long distance relationships. I wan't the relationship to 
progress naturally but I also want to keep it going after he graduates. I am
afraid because of past relationships. I don't know what to do. When I got into
this relationship I knew that he was graduating and that the relationship would
probably end. In the last couple of days he keeps telling me how much he is
going to miss me and how much he loves me. Like I said I don't know what to do.

                        -AJ
Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.singles,soc.couples
From: andy@pangea.Stanford.EDU (Andy Michael USGS Guest)
Subject: Re: Do You Remember - early '60s edition
Organization: Stanford Univ. Earth Sciences
Distribution: usa
Date: Tue, 14 Apr 1992 23:38:24 GMT

In article <1992Apr14.194624.7275@ibmpa.awdpa.ibm.com> ken@batman.austin.ibm.com (Ken Goach) writes:
>joni@cbnewsf.cb.att.com (joni.dunlap) posts:
>
Well lots of people have been posting about favorite old toys, but has
anyone noticed that the 60's list is toy related and the 70's list is
becoming TV related.  Of course we barely had a working TV until the
mid-70's anyway.  Hmmmm....

Anyway back to water rockets:  They are still available.  Last time I
played with one was the week of our wedding when someone brought some
to my in-law's house and we had lots of fun shooting them all over
the backyard until they got completely lost in the woods.  Well I guess
that means they were available 7 years ago, but I bet they still are.

Also has anyone mentioned erector sets!!  They're back but mucho
expensive for very few pieces.  We just bought a few for some of
our nephews and were dissappointed at the price/pieces ratio and
then ran into one in an antique store with literally hundreds of pieces
including about 50 gears in a wood case with rolling castors.  It's
actually by Meccanno, although I think they made the erector sets
sold as erector sets too.  Anyone have any idea when this would have
been made?  And yeah, we're keeping that one for ourselves.

And of course the ultimate toy from the 60's:  Triumphs!!

Ob.romance 1: notice the part about the wedding.
Ob.romance 2: depends what you make with the erector set.
Ob.romance 3: toys are fun gifts and often cheap too.  Anyone that
can't have fun playing with toys isn't worth hanging out with
(IMHO.....  not!).
Ob.romance 4: the first day I gave her a lift somewhere and she found
out I didn't have the graduate student standard issue Datsun B210.

Andy
Proud owner of many many many many more toys than most of our friends
that have kids.  And ours don't get broken so fast! :-)
From: 342LH7L@CMUVM.CSV.CMICH.EDU
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: brenda
Date: 13 Apr 92 21:00:36 GMT
Article-I.D.: CMUVM.92104.170036342LH7L
Organization: Central Michigan University

Jamie Michael Thick       Sec. No. 19145
     I can't remember what your name was but I'll tell you this, it's not worth
 beating a dead horse.  She's married with children not remember (Peggy Bundy).
  Like your really want little Kelly's and Bud's running around the house.  Get
 a new girlfriend.
                    jmt
Xref: sparky alt.romance:7030 soc.singles:11155 soc.couples:2092
From: jsp@uts.amdahl.com (James Preston)
Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.singles,soc.couples
Subject: Re: Sanctity of relationships
Date: 13 Apr 92 22:19:51 GMT
Reply-To: jsp@pls.amdahl.com
Distribution: usa
Organization: Amdahl Corporation, Sunnyvale CA

sms@cbnewsf.cb.att.com (steven.m.stein) writes:

}In article <1992Apr8.162859.17414@ultra.com> stcroix@ultra.com (Bill St. Croix) writes:
}>Personally, I wouldn't want someone to persue my SO.  If she left me for

}Maybe you should lock her up in a cage in your basement so you can ensure
}that no other eyes other than yours will fall upon her body and snatch
}her away from you.  Listen, I never said that I encourage this behavior.
}I never said that it wouldn't hurt the other person involved.  BUT,
}unless you do lock her up in your basement, there is that possibility
}(probably slight), that someone might slip on up to her and express an
}interest.  At that point, it's up to her to say "yes" or "no".  If your
}relationship with her is secure, you have nothing to worry about.  If
}it's not, you probably would loose her anyway.  Does it matter how?
}Whether it's to someone else or not, it will still hurt.  I am secure
}enough with who I am and what I have to offer that I am not paranoid
}over every other guy in the world and worry that just anyone can walk
}up and steal the girl I might be dating at the time.  

I think you might be misunderstanding what some of us are saying.  My
ex was an extremely attractive woman who was always drawing the attention
of men.  And I liked that, it made me feel proud.  If some guy tried to
hit on her when he did NOT know that she wasn't available, it didn't
bother me (it was flattering, actually, to know that I was with a woman
that other men found attractive).  I was totally secure in our relationship,
I had no worry that she would drop me and go off with the guy.

However, if a guy who KNEW that she was involved with me made some moves
on her or flirted with her, that bothered me.  I repeat that I was NOT
bothered because I was worried that she might drop me.  No, I was bothered
because the other guy was clearly showing a lack of RESPECT for our
relationship.  If you KNOW that someone is involved, who keep your bloody
hands off, that is merely respectful.  And that was the context of the
original question: knowing that someone was involved and yet pursuing
him/her anyway.  Under those circumstances, you are scum because you are
showing a lack of respect for an existing relationship.

Understand?  Those who keep going on about the free will of the person
being pursued are just missing the point.  It has nothing to do with
anyone's free will, it has to do with showing respect for an existing
relationship.  If you want to respect a person's free will, then you
damned well better respect the free choice that they have already made
to be in that relationship; respect their free will by letting THEM
decide when the relationship should end without adding your influence.

--James Preston

Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: jwhitney@hamp.hampshire.edu
Subject: Re: nightmare at 10 downing st!!!
Organization: Hampshire College
Date: Sun, 12 Apr 1992 13:38:26 GMT

even though this person might feel like killing themselves it is not because of
a romance. They should refer to alt.politics!

nfw




Newsgroups: alt.romance,soc.couples,soc.singles
From: bicker@cbnewsi.cb.att.com (The Resource, Poet-Magician of Quality)
Subject: Re: Sanctity of relationships
Reply-To: Brian.C.Kohn@att.com (The Resource, Poet-Magician of Quality)
Organization: The Internet
Date: Fri, 10 Apr 1992 12:45:19 GMT
Followup-To: alt.romance,soc.couples,soc.singles

In article <1992Apr8.111700.4735@hemlock.cray.com> robd@cray.com (Robert Derrick) writes:
>My solution:  if you feel it is right and correct, and you are
>	willing to accept all of the consequences, then do it.
>	this is called following your original nature.

I don't like this solution.  We've evolved past our "original nature"
into civilized, social and liberal beings.  We have developed a
*humanity* that I find very essential to our future, and to my
self-respect and respect for other people.

>	      if you are not sure, the most likely scenerio, then
>	make a decision and stick by it, and accept it and be
>	proud of it.

I agree with this statement completely.  Never second guess yourself.

-- 
Brian Charles Kohn             AT&T Bell Laboratories Quality Process Center
ISO Certified Lead Assessor    E-MAIL: att!hoqax!bicker  (bicker@hoqax.ATT.COM)
    'Hope, not fear, is the most positive advocate of action.' - S.R. Lawhead
                   Stamp Out "SO": "RP" = "Romantic Partner"
From: rrosenberg@vax.clarku.edu
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: RE: Love Notes
Date: 11 Apr 92 00:35:38 GMT
Organization: Clark University

FIRST OF ALL, I THINK IT'S IMPORTANT THAT I KNOW A LITTLE BIT ABOUT THE
PERSON YOU ARE WRITING TOO.  WHAT KIND OF IMAGE ARE YOU LOOKING FOR?
WHAT KIND OF LOVE NOTE IS THIS EXACTLY?  WHAT I MEAN IS, ARE YOU WRITING
TO SOMEONE YOU'VE HAD A RELATIONSHIP WITH FOR A LONG TIME OR IS THIS TO
SOMEONE YOU DON'T KNOW OR IS IT TO YOUR MOM? IS THIS A NOTE TO ANYONE
IN PARTICULAR?  ARE YOU JUST GETTING IDEAS?  SHAKESPEAR ONCE SAID THAT
THESE TYPE OF SAYINGS ABOUT LOVE ARE SUPERFICIAL.  PERSONALLY I THINK
THEY ARE GREAT, BUT THEY HAVE TO BE SAID THE RIGHT WAY.  ANYWAY, I THINK
I CAN HELP YOU OUT.  GIVE ME A LITTLE MORE INFORMATION.
-REBECCA
From: aatresa@lims02.lerc.nasa.gov (Teresa Kline)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Ed and Teresa  (Carp ????)
Date: 17 Apr 92 12:57:00 GMT
Article-I.D.: lims02.17APR199207574197
Organization: Yeah, *right* !
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41

In article <kuru5lINNcnv@jethro.Corp.Sun.COM>, erc@pogo.Corp.Sun.COM (Ed Carp) writes...
>In article <16APR199213085985@lims02.lerc.nasa.gov> aatresa@lims02.lerc.nasa.gov (Teresa Kline) writes:
> 
>>Well, since you're working so hard for me and Ed, maybe we'll start looking 
>>out for *your* best interests.  Besides, it's not like Ed and I have a done 
>>deal.  (I imagine Stephen is looking and feeling hunted right about now.)  
> 
>Um, would you mind faxing me his picture?  Better yet, drop one in the mail.
>Get him to sign it "With love, Stephen"...
> 

I *knew* you were just using me to get to Stephen!  <sniff, sniff>  

:) :)

>>It's *not* that kind of work!  :)
> 
>Oh?  Tell us about it, Teresa! :)

No.
-- Teresa

		Life -- just for the FUN of it!!!!
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: aatresa@lims01.lerc.nasa.gov (Teresa Kline)
Subject: Re: And Now for Something Apartly Similar...(kiss!)
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41    
Keywords: READ,KILL,READ,WALK THE DOG,READ,GRIT THY TEETH,READ...
Organization: Yeah, *right* !
Distribution: usa
Date: 13 Apr 1992 17:11 EST  

In article <kuc8q2INNlka@jethro.Corp.Sun.COM>, erc@pogo.Corp.Sun.COM (Ed Carp) writes...
>In article <10APR199208054266@lims02.lerc.nasa.gov> aatresa@lims02.lerc.nasa.gov (Teresa Kline) writes:
>>In article <1992Apr9.213516.8093@metter.fmpmis.metter.com>, virgo@metter.fmpmis.metter.com (Paul "Axel" Virgo) writes...
> 
>>>Teresa will kick me in my duff,
> 
>>Nah, I wouldn't do a thing like that...I'm a lady.
> 
> 
>That's right ... and poison is a lady's weapon...
> 
>Just thought you ought to know :)

*You* might do well to keep that in mind.  :)

-- Teresa

		Life -- just for the FUN of it!!!!
From: taina@cs.Helsinki.FI (Juha Taina)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Something special in a LDR
Date: 12 Apr 92 15:12:57 GMT
Organization: University of Helsinki, Finland


Hello everybody,

About six months ago I asked here how to show my SO 
how much I care for her.  I think this is a good time to bring the
topic up again.  Here are some ideas:


Write a poem and buy a stuffed animal.  Put the poem in its hand and
send it in a packet (Originally from C. Petit)

Home-made cookies (suggested several times here)

Flowers

Post an article like this where you tell that someone far away is very
important to you

Ask your friends to send small notes on their birthday (This is
suggested here too, I suppose)

Write a romantic story where you and your love are the major
characters

Send a hand-made card

Compile a tape of your favorite (love)songs

Compose a song for your SO


Any others?

Juha
-- 
Juha Taina                     | Internet: taina@cs.helsinki.fi
University of Helsinki         | Bitnet:   taina@finuh
Department of Computer Science | Phone:    +358-0-708-4184
From: bogus@milton.u.washington.edu (Young and Wealthy)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Compatability test request
Date: 15 Apr 92 16:19:00 GMT
Article-I.D.: milton.bogus.703354740
Organization: University of Washington

OK, here is the deal, I met a lady 3 weeks ago and I went up to her and we
had a good conversation.  I got her number and we talked more on the phone.
I asked her to have dinner with me and she said yes.  We continue to see
each other on the regular basis and finally I told her I am very attracted
to her and I wanted to kiss her.  Of course, we did and now she is having 
seconds thoughts because she have a BAD temper and she is very moody.  She
is not sure if I can handle her so she says maybe it's best if we don't 
pursue this further, but on the other hand, she really likes me.  So my
question is that is there any personality compatability test that I can
use to solve my problem?  Any other advise would be helpful as well.  Thanks.

Peter
-- 
If scientific reasoning were limited to the logical processes of
arithmetic, we should not get very far in our understanding of the
physical world.  One might as well attempt to grasp the game of poker
entirely by the use of the mathematics of probability.
From: erc@pogo.Corp.Sun.COM (Ed Carp)
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Re: Ed and Teresa  (Carp ????)
Date: 10 Apr 92 23:27:37 GMT
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Mt. View, Ca.
NNTP-Posting-Host: pogo.corp.sun.com

In article <10APR199210425847@lims02.lerc.nasa.gov> afdenis@lims02.lerc.nasa.gov (Stephen Dennison) writes:

>Sounds like a dodge to me ...

Hey, Dennison?  Quiet!  And stop snickering ... I can hear you all the way out ehre!
--
Ed Carp                                      415/336-0797 (work)

++ UNIX  SysAdmin, Systems  Programming  Services,  Utilities ++
++ and Programmer Productivity Tools                          ++
From: schwing_g@cho006.cho.ge.com
Newsgroups: alt.romance
Subject: Where did the romance go?
Date: 8 Apr 92 02:13:27 GMT
Organization: GE Fanuc Automation, North America

My question and personal thoughts on all the subjects...

I reaad this newsgroup originally because I thought I could find some people
who felt like I did:

Life is wonderful and sharing it with someone special is even better...
What happened to ROMANCE here???? All I hear is bitching about ..men this,
women that, love sucks, I'm a nerd, BOO-HOO-HOO-HOO.......Bleah!

Romance is to me -- Walking by a quiet river at night, holding hands, enjoying
the company of the person with you, love or no love...I certainly DO NOT have
to be in love to be romantic...Dating is fun! Sure...I have my times when I am
without anyone, but SO WHAT,....Someone always comes along and each time I
learn more about myself and how I handle intrapersonal relationships...You all
make me SICK!  Again, my question, WHAT HAPPENED TO ROMANCE HERE????????

I am sorry for scorching the earth with my flame, but I would like to hear
more about romance and how wonderful it can be to have someone special in your
life, if only for a short time...

Yours Truly

Greyson


FLAME PROOF!  Merely a personal opinion!

:-} B-} ;-b
Newsgroups: alt.romance
From: greg@pomona.claremont.edu (Tigger)
Subject: Re: a question
Organization: Pomona College
Date: 6 Apr 92 22:38:43 PDT

In article <1992Apr6.103113.1@stat.appstate.edu>, grs01153@stat.appstate.edu writes:
>
> What exactlty constitutes 'cheatin' on someone?

The violation of a trust, be it written or unwritten.  If we're playing
poker, I trust you not to have cards up your sleeve.  If we're having
a relationship, I trust you not to be intimate with another person.  Of
course, either of those examples fall apart if there is some other
understanding between the people involved, but then there isn't any such
trust to be violated.

|  Greg Orman                               greg@pomona.claremont.edu  |
|                      Live to Ride, Ride to Live                      |
|   I'm thinking about changing my name.  What do you think of "Tim"?  |
Newsgroups: alt.romance,alt.romance.chat