HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: russ@bbxrbk (Russ Kepler)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Bleeding heart liberals
Date: 23 Dec 92 03:39:28 GMT
Organization: russ at home in Albuquerque New Mexico

In article <1992Dec22.225302.2431@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> bberbeni@nyx.cs.du.edu (Bill Berbenich) writes:
>In <BzL2C5.B5H@news.iastate.edu> z1dan@exnet.iastate.edu (Dan Sorenson -- Cereal Killer) writes:
>>	Well it sure as hell wasn't me, DAC!  I was out shooting all
>>day, and have been working fairly hard this evening.
>
>I know if *_I_* had been out shooting all day, I'd be QUITE HARD and
>not just fairly hard, working or relaxing.

Well, I was out shooting most of the morning, and I'm peeved.  Not 
hard, just peeved.

A week or so ago I spent some time in the evening (hard won time, I
might add) to make a rather nice target stand out of PVC.  I took it
out this morning for the first time, along with a couple of fellow
peevers: Dan Hillman and (let's not forget) Chris Baldwin.

Dan, in his inimitable style, shot mostly in the black.  I wandered
around on the target again, not having the patience to shoot well. 
But Chris...

What can I say about a fellow who get such nice groups?  He could land
5-6 rounds all in a row, all withing a inch circle.  I know that it
was an inch circle because the FUCKING TARGET STAND WAS MADE OF 1 1/4"
PCV AND IT'S NOW ALL SHOT UP!!!!  Sorry, I lost control.

So, you feed 'em, give 'em ammo and what do they do?  THEY TAKE A
FUCKING SKIING VACATION IN COLORADO AND DON'T EVEN OFFER TO TAKE YOU
ALONG!  Oh, sorry again, lost it for a bit...

Well, I guess I'll just head out to the garage and try to patch up the
stand.  I can always make it sit about 3' high, but I guess I'll just
head out to the hardware store and get a couple of slip joints and
piece it back together.

-- 
Russ Kepler, posting from home   russ@bbx.basis.com, bbxrbk!russ@bbx.basis.com
Will hack unix for food
From: johnf@Auspex.COM (John Fereira)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Rhino virus peeve
Date: 30 Dec 92 22:34:30 GMT
Organization: Auspex Systems, Inc.

In article <1992Dec30.052457.10035@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> bberbeni@nyx.cs.du.edu (Bill Berbenich) writes:

>What is the difference between horns and antlers?
 
You can honk a horn.

-- 
+==========================================================================+
| John Fereira        | Auspex Systems | "Ask me about my vow of silence." |
| johnf@auspex.com    | Santa Clara CA |                                   |
+==========================================================================+
From: jeremy@castle.ed.ac.uk (Jeremy Henderson)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: I am the superuser!!
Date: 31 Dec 92 13:00:15 GMT
Organization: Edinburgh University


This isn't a peeve, but there isn't a newsgroup called alt.things-that-aren't-
really-peeves, so tough luck.

My new workstation has just arrived, making me somewhat the master of my own
destiny, not to mention supplying a CD-player which can be persuaded to
play my CD's through the computer's speakers.

But the biggest excitement is that I am now System Manager. I spent the first
morning sending messages saying ***System going down - logout immediately***
every five minutes - just like a *real grown up system manager!!*. Of course
I was the only one logged in, so my excitement was a bit muted, but still.

Then I decided that I should draw up a list of Computing Regulations, to
be signed by anyone who wants to use *my* workstation. I decided to model
my regulations on the Edinburgh University ones, but that was a fairly short
list, viz, "Anything the System Manager says is right, even when it's obvious
to a person with the mental ability of a dead dog that it's wrong". Should do
for starters though. As a special Christmas treat I decided to pull Mike
Holmes's account. Of course before I did that I had to create one for him,
but it was worth it.

ObECPeeve: The witless fools at the EC have finally signed my contract.
They back-dated it to December 1st, so I can start work immediately in Paris.
But they didn't bother telling anyone that this was what they'd done, far
less mailed anyone a copy of the signed contract.

ParisAntiPeeve: The prospect of shortly being a resident of the most brilliant
city in the Universe.




-- 
===Jeremy Henderson===jeremy@castle.ed.ac.uk=          

This message cost the net hundreds if not thousands of dollars.
Bloody good value if you ask me.
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: dennis@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu (Thomas A. Dennis)
Subject: Re: As I look around me I see... PAPER!
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana
Date: Mon, 21 Dec 1992 19:14:51 GMT

Some years ago, in order to combat the increasing amount of junk that I was 
dragging from apartment to apartment, I bought a book called _Clutter's Last 
Stand_, which promised to help me "de-junk" my life.  It's in a box around here
somowhere...

--
>---<

Tom Dennis                  | "I have seen all the works that are done
dennis@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu  |    under the sun; and, behold, all is 
(217)384-2504               |      vanity and vexation of spirit."
From: dourish@EuroPARC.Xerox.COM (Paul Dourish)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: A Definite Not-Peeve, involves money
Date: 23 Dec 92 12:35:03 GMT
Reply-To: dourish@EuroPARC.Xerox.COM (Paul Dourish)
Organization: Rank Xerox EuroPARC, Cambridge, UK

In article <1h8ktcINN3h9@cardamom.compnews.co.uk>, sjl@compnews.co.uk (Steve Lacey) writes:
> tony@mantis.co.uk (Tony Lezard) writes:
> : 
> : ObPeeve: It's just started getting cold enough here that you have to
> : spend ten minutes every morning scraping the ice off your car before you
> : can go anywhere with confidence. And same again in the evening.
> : 
> Or scraping the ice off the *inside* of your car...

At least your cars bloody start once you've done it. This is
definitely today's peeve. A friend, away for the holiday, has leant me
her car, which is good because I only recently, after many years of
prevaricating, got my driving license. Now I want to practice.
(Another time, we'll do the driving-in-Cambridge peeve, and the
first-drive-after-passing-your-test-with-the-nervous-owner-of-the-car
peeve.) But noooo..... and, since she's disappeared, I'm gonna have to
find out for myself what particular kind of coaxing this car requires.

Second peeve: Coming out this morning to find a note on the car saying
"don't park here -- private property". I know that -- I LIVE HERE!
Just 'cos I've not used my parking space for the last n years, some
other bozo has decided that it's not only his, but that he has
sufficient territorial rights that he can defend them by leaving
snotty notes on my car.

I was remarkably restrained in writing my response. I wonder how long
we'll converse through notes under the wipers, or at what stage we
start writing them on bricks hurled through appropriate windscreens?

Jerk-off. Sigh.

                                                  -- Paul.
From: larry@peak.psl.nmsu.edu (Evil Engineer doin' it the Cowboy Way)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Hawk/Falcon peeve
Date: 26 Dec 92 03:34:42 GMT
Organization: New Mexico State University, MetaPhysical Science Laboratory

>>>>> On Thu, 24 Dec 92 04:06:55 GMT, bberbeni@nyx.cs.du.edu (Bill Berbenich) said:

Bill> You remember my tale of the hawk about a month and a half
Bill> ago?  That bird was great.  It warmed the cockles of my
Bill> heart to see nature at work.  I felt like digging up father
Bill> Darwin for a brandy!

Bill> Well, I haven't seen the damned bird in over a month now.
Bill> The pigeons are all gone, too.  But the squirrels prosper.

Bill> Peeve:  Missing raptors.  They hook your heart and then they leave.

I've got a roadrunner in the back yard, big as an owl. The CO (a true
bird lover) really admired him, until I explained why he liked our back
yard so well: we have a steady supply of baby birds. [Thanks to $50 a
month worth of bird seed the CO scatters each day.]

It's the same reason we have three neighbor's cats out there most of the
time too.

Peeve: The notion that "cute" critters somehow deserve to live more than 
       the rest.

Antipeeve: The roadrunner ain't afraid of cats.

Peeve: There are some "unusual" grasses (the kind that gag the lawnmower)
       around the bird bath. No doubt the desert equivalent of kudzoo,
       sprouted from the bird seed.

I feel a bit like a character in a Stephen King novel..

		...Kkkaakkkkkkk!!!

(((lawnmower man indeed!)))
L.
"Yeh, Buddy..            | larry@psl.nmsu.edu (Larry Cunningham)|  _~~_
 I've got your COMPUTER! | % Physical Science Laboratory        | (O)(-)
 Right HERE!!"           | New Mexico State University          |  /..\ 
 (computer THIS!)        | Las Cruces, New Mexico, USA 88003    |   <> 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Disclaimer: Opinions expressed here are CORRECT, mine, and not PSLs or NMSUs..
The first time I had sex, I was terrified. I was alone..
From: dre@catnip.berkeley.ca.us (Andre)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Alarm clocks & Guns 'n Roses
Date: 1 Jan 93 21:02:21 GMT
Organization: The San Jose Home for Perverted Hackers

dmarcher@acsu.buffalo.edu (Dave Archer) writes:


>ObPeeve:  Being a night person in a day people's world.  

>Night people of the world unite!  We shall abolish the 9-5
>'normal' daytime working hours and force THEM to stay in
>bed until noon.  Fast Food restraurants will be mandated by
>law to stay open until 6am, and all info-mercials will be
>restricted to the hours of 7am - noon.

Fuckhead.  Do you get up later in the winter and earlier in the summer?
Thought not.

-- 
"And tell me, how did you come to have so many children?"
"Well, Groucho, I love my wife."
"I love my cigar too, but I take it out sometimes."
From: dac@prolix.apana.org.au (Andrew Clayton)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: CINDY CRAWFORD (AGAIN)
Date: Mon, 21 Dec 1992 04:47:48 GMT
Organization: More like Dis~, really.
X-Newsreader: Arn V1.00

In article <1ga1dlINNnav@mercury.kingston.ac.uk>, Bhogal L S writes:

> Well I never thought I would get so much abuse just for asking a simple 
> question. 

You wrote in alt.peeves didn't ya?

What did you expect? Sweetness and light? Calmness and
rationality? Perhaps you thought someone would adulate you until
your underpants got soggy?

Really, Bhogal, perhaps you ought to get a grip on yourself.

> Why does everyone assume that I want to masturbate over the calendar?

Not everyone. Just a few peevers, you oversensitive goit!

> Surely none of you appreciate the artistic merit and beauty of the pictures.

> I noticed that most of the abuse was from female internetters.

You like female bodies? Is that a peeve?

You get labelled 'malicious pervert' by some dowdy old bints in
alt.peeves, due to your public drooling over the thought of
having your _very own_ Cindy Crawford Calendar. I repeat: What
did you expect?

Peeve: Thick people.

> Anyway, if the tone of the memo came across as being loud and obnoxious
> this was purely unintentional. I have since found the CAPS-LOCK key (see).

What a clever lump of pond scum you turn out to be. Next thing
the readers of alt.peeves will know, you'll be spouting
philosophical intricacies, and solving all of the worlds problems
without even breathing heavily.

Fuck right off.

Dac
--
dac@prolix.apana.org.au              David Andrew Clayton.           // _| _  _
dac@prolix.sserve.cc.adfa.oz.au      Canberra, Australia           \X/ (_](_](_
                    <Using ARN on an Amiga 4000. Yay!>
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: bberbeni@nyx.cs.du.edu (Bill Berbenich)
Subject: Re: Why me!
Organization: University of Denver, Dept. of Math & Comp. Sci.
Date: Tue, 22 Dec 92 02:41:00 GMT

In <1h5geaINN55k@cardinal.ksu.ksu.edu> cress@cardinal.ksu.ksu.edu (Water C Cress) writes:

>In article <Yrqas*NJ0@prolix.apana.org.au>, dac@prolix.apana.org.au (Andrew Clayton) writes:
>>So I get an article accepted by the moderator of rec.humor.funny,
>>and it gets published in that newsgroup on the SAME DAY as one
>>from Steve fucking Franklin.

>>Sheesh.

>This is just stunningly relevant.

Hey!  Back into the salad with you!

Lovingly,
  -Bill
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: obrien@netcom.com (Robert O'Brien)
Subject: Re: A Definite Not-Peeve, involves money
Organization: Netcom Online Communications Services (408-241-9760 login: guest)
Date: Sun, 27 Dec 1992 04:43:03 GMT

In article <1992Dec17.042804.15837@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> bberbeni@nyx.cs.du.edu (Bill Berbenich) writes:
>There is a definite Not-Peeve/Anti-Peeve coming down the pike and it involves
>a substantial chunk of change (money, for the jargonally-impaired).  No hints
>yet, but it looks big.  BIG big.
>
>Details as they become known, but there are no acts of perversion involved
>in this thing as far as I know (or can recall).
>
>Life is definitely good!  I am so excited I can hardly stand it.
>xxxFx.fkl
>CARRIER LOST
>--
>Lost .sig:  Reward if returned unharmed.  e-mail me for details.  some
>            restrictions apply.


Gee, I got one of those 'finalist' letters from Publisher's Clearing House, too!


ObPeeve: So did my grandmother, who took it far more seriously than
she should - thinking maybe she had a 1:1000 chance or so...

	Bob O'Bob
--
From: dac@prolix.apana.org.au (Andrew Clayton)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: re:  A Definite Not-Peeve
Date: Mon, 21 Dec 1992 04:36:30 GMT
Organization: More like Dis~, really.
X-Newsreader: Arn V1.00

In article <BzF9A2.EKp@nic.umass.edu>, BRADLEY P HEINTZ writes:

> In <1992Dec17.042804.15837@mnemosyne.cs.du.edu> bberbeni@nyx.cs.du.edu writes:
 
> > Lost .sig:  Reward if returned unharmed.  e-mail me for details.  some
> >             restrictions apply.
 
> Peeve:    The dumbest fucking .sig I've ever seen.

Fair enough.

However, your own .sig was tainted with 'the sign of the net
lamer', by virtue of it's being doubled:

> - Brad
> 
> *=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=*
> Illuminatus Primus 1:  If all are one, all violence is masochism.
> Illuminatus Primus 2:  If all are one, all sex is masturbation.
> 
> bpheintz@phobos.ucc.umass.edu
> Your mother's an astronaut.
> 
> *=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=*
> Illuminatus Primus 1:  If all are one, all violence is masochism.
> Illuminatus Primus 2:  If all are one, all sex is masturbation.
> 
> bpheintz@phobos.ucc.umass.edu
> Your mother's an astronaut.

I am sure you have received many rebukes for your fuckheadedness,
I just like pointing out the bleeding obvious.

[I get sick of reiterating 'Hey, Banta, you're a smeghead'
though, and it only irritates the poor man when he can't think
of anything as banal and truthful to pop right back]

Addendum: I hope this gets out. New newsreaders are somewhat of a
pain in the rear to get working correctly. :-/

!Peeve: If it doesn't get out, I'm saved the embarrassment of it
	all.

Dac
--
dac@prolix.apana.org.au              David Andrew Clayton.           // _| _  _
dac@prolix.sserve.cc.adfa.oz.au      Canberra, Australia           \X/ (_](_](_
                    <Using ARN on an Amiga 4000. Yay!>
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: dmunroe@vcd.hp.com (Dave Munroe)
Subject: Re: Bleeding heart liberals
Date: Mon, 21 Dec 1992 18:10:33 GMT
Organization: Hewlett-Packard

Andrew Clayton writes:

>So many people are putting the brakes on threads by using
>Godwin's Law.

Conversely, in alt.nazi the argument is said to be dead and lost when someone
mentions BIFF.

-Dave
                _  O
               {_}/|______                                                   
                |(( |   | ))                                               ___
~~~~~~~~~~~~oo&@+~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~'~~~
From: dmunroe@vcd.hp.com (Dave Munroe)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Palestine.
Date: 21 Dec 92 22:56:40 GMT
Organization: Hewlett-Packard

eradm@wbst845e.xerox.com writes:

>I love some of the pronunciations around Rochester, NY. For instance, the town
>Chili is pronounced ChieLie instead of Chilly. And Charlotte is pronounced
>with the emphasis on the second syllable instead of the first. And Rochester is
>pronounced Rochstr.

This reminded me of a section in Willard R. Espy's "Words at Play"; I don't
know how accurate it is.

Peeve: someone is sure to tell me.


English proper names:

	-- name --		-- pronunciation --

	Cholmondeley		chumbley
	Alnwick			anick
	Hargham			haarfan
	Terfilian		treveelan
	Zwill			yool

English place names:

	Abergavenny		aber-genny
	Leominster		lem-ster
	Cirencester		sis-e-ter
	Churchtown		chow-zen
	Uttoxeter		uck-ster
	Godmanchester		gum-sister or gon-shister
	Wymondham		win-dum
	Jervaulx		jar-vis
	Amotherby		amer-by
	Pontrefact		pom-fret
	Lympne			lim
	Mousehole		moo-zel
	Ulgham			uff-am
	Ulverston		oo-ston

Scottish names and pronunciation:

	Kircudbright		ker-koo-bree
	Balquhidder		bal-widder
	Dalziel			dee-ell
	Borrowstounness		bo-nes


-Dave "I wish I were a Corsican" Munroe


                _  O
               {_}/|______                                                   
                |(( |   | ))                                               ___
~~~~~~~~~~~~oo&@+~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~'~~~
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
From: larry@peak.psl.nmsu.edu (Evil Engineer doin' it the Cowboy Way)
Subject: cross-posting peeves. Again
Organization: New Mexico State University, MetaPhysical Science Laboratory
Distribution: alt.peeves
Date: Sun, 27 Dec 1992 10:17:40 GMT

Grouchy old bastard that I am, I find myself peeved by:

     From: cs360@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (Geoffrey William Buhl)
     Newsgroups: alt.flame,soc.culture.african.american,alt.politics.correct,
     misc.test,talk.politics.misc,alt.peeves,alt.politics.clinton,alt.
     president.clinton,alt.religion.kibology,alt.politics.bush,alt.fan.
     rush-limbaugh,alt.rap
     ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Christ on a crutch! Look at that. Is that *13* cross-posts?
You left out alt.matters.of.great.importance.to.all.earth.people.

     Subject: Re: CORRECT VIEW ON RACISM
     Date: 25 Dec 1992 04:28:39 GMT
     Organization: Case Western Reserve University, Cleveland, Ohio (USA)
     NNTP-Posting-Host: hela.ins.cwru.edu

	 All I have to say about this is: This is why I have a gun.

(So I'm wondering: So why doesn't he use the gun? On himself..)

Peeve: I'm already mad at the guy and I don't even know what he is saying
       or responding to.

.. Just because he responds to a cross-post of 13 newsgroups. (To be fair,
maybe he just forgot to edit the newgroup line in his response.)

     R U Down for tha WAR
     Geoff
     -- 
	  Geoffrey Buhl - cs360@cleveland.freenet.edu
       Anybody from University of Detroit Jesuit High School out there?
       If so E-mail me.

Then again..

Peeve: People who smatter their electronic philosophical flatulances from 
       hell to breakfast on the net, apparently in the blind assumption that
       their subject is so universally relevant.

(I better be careful here, with my own electronic philosophical
flatulances, eh?)

Peeve: That the network accepts cross-posts to more than three or four
       newsgroups at a time in the first place. It's too much power to
       make available to someone whose testes haven't completely descended
       yet.

I blame a programmer. A C programmer, probably a unix guru somewhere. He
was probably distracted, figuring out how to add a sixth layer of keyboard
remapping to "fix" someone's [like mine] net access software..

   Nested Peeve: programming ain't a fit occupation for a human being 
                 anyway.

Peeve: That the newsreaders faithfully pick up 13 cross-posts for
       someone's reply. It propagates the problem.

Now where's that net.terrorist when you need him?

L.
"Yeh, Buddy..            | larry@psl.nmsu.edu (Larry Cunningham)|  _~~_
 I've got your COMPUTER! | % Physical Science Laboratory        | (O)(-)
 Right HERE!!"           | New Mexico State University          |  /..\ 
 (computer THIS!)        | Las Cruces, New Mexico, USA 88003    |   <> 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Disclaimer: Opinions expressed here are CORRECT, mine, and not PSLs or NMSUs..
Freedom, freedom, take the wall away! Freedom, freedom, we will not obey!
From: logan@ccwf.cc.utexas.edu (Logan Shaw)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: Re: Peeves about Teenagers
Date: 2 Jan 93 07:13:48 GMT
Organization: The University of Texas at Austin

In article <2pSds*EP0@prolix.apana.org.au> dac@prolix.apana.org.au (Andrew Clayton) writes:
>SO and I had a triffic time surveying the dam [Googong reservoir,
>part of the ACT Electricity and Water supply], watching swifts
>getting insects, and feeding them to their offspring in nests
>made out of some 10cm round holes in the concrete banks of the
>dam's spillway.  It was hot too 30C [85F].  A major peeve of mine
>is hot weather.  But heck, it is summer.

You're just *trying* to provoke me, aren't you?  Today in the Dallas/Fort
Worth metro area, it rained.  Then, while the roads were still wet, it
froze (i.e. 30F, -1C).   Over in Fort Worth (~800,000 in population, I
think), they have ONE truck for sanding the roads.  Combine all that with
the typical Southerner's inability to drive on icy roads (which are hard
for *anyone* to drive on), and you get over 300 traffic accidents including
2 fatalities, all in one evening.  Happy New Years!

So, I don't want to hear complaining about hot weather.  Actually, you're
not complaining about hot weather, you just *think* you are.  What you're
really complaining about is *normal* weather.  Hot weather is when it's
105F (that's around 41C, I'd guess).

So there.

Peeve:  People who complain about things they actually have really good,
like my roommate, who has been known to complain that he didn't do well on
a test only to find out later that he got a perfect score.

Peeve:  That I just don't feel like this post of mine is very original and
maybe I'm just using it to vent frustration.  Please, nobody respond that
this is also your peeve, then I'll think it's true.

Gosh, it certainly is fun to complain, and to be negative.

I need to stop making paragraphs that consist of a single simple statement.

I think I will.

Adios,
  Logan
-- 
                              _________-_________
                              ________---________
                              _________-_________
                              _________-_________
From: dac@prolix.apana.org.au (Andrew Clayton)
Newsgroups: alt.peeves
Subject: re:  A Definite Not-Peeve
Date: Wed, 23 Dec 1992 11:40:59 GMT
Organization: More like Dis~, really.
X-Newsreader: Arn V1.00

In article <BzMGA5.LHt@nic.umass.edu>, BRADLEY P HEINTZ writes:

> In <Ktpas*BJ0@prolix.apana.org.au> dac@prolix.apana.org.au writes:
> 
> > I am sure you have received many rebukes for your fuckheadedness,
 
> Actually, yours was the first such rebuke.  My foolish behavior is
> acknowledged, and, I hope corrected.

Yes, the problem is rectified.

Go in peace, son. 

[no vomiting allowed]

Dac
--
dac@prolix.apana.org.au              David Andrew Clayton.           // _| _  _
dac@prolix.sserve.cc.adfa.oz.au      Canberra, Australia           \X/ (_](_](_
                    <Using ARN on an Amiga 4000. Yay!>
                    Wearing my alt.peeves chaplain cap.
Newsgroups: alt.peeves,alt.angst