From: glp@fig.citib.com (Greg Parkinson)
Subject: Re: I HATE GAY MEN.
Originator: glp@merlin
Organization: Citibank IBISM
Date: Wed, 29 Jul 1992 18:25:57 GMT


In article <1992Jul28.180008.25504@wam.umd.edu>, aasos@next02wor.wam.umd.edu (Dimensional X) writes:
|> An article from "WAKE uP QUEERS OR WE'RE ALL THROUGh" leaflet passed out a NYC  
|> Gay Pride. Published by Anonymous Queers June 1992.
|> ----
|> I HATE GAY MEN.  I feel more and more hopeless about our community.  Turn any  
|> corner in the ghetto and you can grab sex, but you have to search high and low  
|> to find real love.

Converse:  Live where there are no other gay men (continuing the
context) and see how easy it is to find real love, much less
sex or affection.  Talk to lesbians and straight people about
finding real love - I don't think they'll brag about how easy
it is for them.

|> I don't believe that lesbians, faced with the  
|> tragedy of AIDS, would have failed as we have failed.  That thought alone keeps  
|> me hopeful.

I am indeed tired of this gay-men-are-worthless-lesbians-are-perfect
rant.  I've known some wonderful people of both genders and across
the kinsey scale.  I've known some horrible people as well.  The
most manipulative low-life group of people I have ever had the bad 
luck to be involved with were lesbians.  I can imagine *them* in a
crisis! (tell me I don't have to add the disclaimer that I draw
no conclusions about lesbians in general from this?)
 
And to say that gay men have *failed* wrt AIDS - what would things 
be like now had gay men done nothing?  Much different.  Lesbians 
helped, straight people helped, but the majority of the work was 
done by gay men because we were threatened and we did what we could 
to protect ourselves.  Not perfect by any means, but an incredible 
amount of work by too many people to allow it to be denigrated.

|> I hate the way we have unsafe sex with each other in the night, but when  
|> morning comes, we say nothing. 

Who's this "we"?

|> I hate the way we flock to have sex in the backrooms and sex clubs, drunk, on  
|> drugs, with little sense of who we are or who we are with, but when the  
|> department of health or the cops or Channel 4 News threatens to pull the plug  
|> on the party, we say nothing.

Who's this "we"?

|> I hate the way sex is always more important than love, they way we have no  
|> respect for each other's relationships, the way every man is a possible hit.  I  
|> hate the way everyone flirts with your lover if you have one, and you find out  
|> who your friends are by learning who doesn't make a pass at him. 

My lover Dave is currently between summer school and 
starting his fall semester.  He works out during the
day and yesterday told me about someone he met there
and had lunch with.  The guy was going on and on about
how awful gay men are, blah blah blah, just like this.
Dave was amazed because the people he knows - most of
them through me and a number of them motss people - 
are wonderful, kind, caring people.  I haven't found
it hard to meet good people, and I wonder what sort of
life these people who complain so much build for themselves.
And people who find out that we are lovers don't try to
break us up or hit on me or him - they are happy for us
because we are happy.

So this stuff just doesn't wash with me.

|> I hate the way we are not, as people, very much there for each other.

This is just too much.  I wonder if the guy who wrote this
has ever "been there" for anyone?  When no one else would
get near us, gay men were there for each other and continue
to be.  

|> Anyone who has spent the last five years in AIDS activism  
|> knows that if lesbians hadn't been there, we would never have paid any  
|> attention to anyone but rich white fags.

This is a lie.

Shit, this is tiring......

-- 
Greg Parkinson                  Phone: 212-657-7814  Fax: 212-825-8607
Citibank,111 Wall Street        E-Mail: glp@fig.citib.com
New York, New York  10043
The opinions expressed are my own and not those of the big 'ol bank.
Newsgroups: soc.motss