From: kevinle@eb4ts1.EBay.Sun.COM (Kevin Le)
Newsgroups: soc.culture.vietnamese
Subject: You Might Be Considered a RED NECK if....
Date: 16 Oct 92 14:45:42 GMT
Reply-To: kevinle@eb4ts1.EBay.Sun.COM (Kevin Le)
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Inc.  Mt. View, Ca.
NNTP-Posting-Host: eb4ts1.ebay.sun.com




 1.  Your front porch collapses and you kill more than 6 dogs.
 2.  You've even used lard in BED.
 3.  You think potted meat on saltines is a HORS D' OEUVRE.
 4.  There is a stuffed possum mounted somewhere in your house.
 5.  You consider a six-pack & a bug zapper as quality entertainment.
 6.  Less than half the cars you own run.
 7.  Your mother doesn't remove the Marlboro from her lips before telling
     the state trooper to kiss off.
 8.  The primary color of your car is "Bondo"
 9.  You honestly think women are turned on by animal noises and seductive
     tongue gestures.
10.  Your family tree doesn't fork.
11.  You've hollered "ROCK THE HOUSE, BUBBA" during a piano recital.
12.  Your mother has never been involved in a fist fight at a high school
     sports events.
13.  You've even barbecued SPAM on the grill.
14.  Your neighbors started a petition over your Christmas lighting.
15.  Your brother-in-law is your uncle.
16.  The rear tires are twice as wide as your front ones.
17.  You consider "Outdoor Life" as deep reading.
18.  The diploma hanging in your den has "Trucking Institute" somewhere
     on it.
19.  Your mother keeps a spit cup on the ironing board.
20.  You've even worn a tube top to a wedding.
21.  You think "DOM PERIGNON" is a Mafia leader.
22.  Your father encourages you to quit school because Larry has an opening
     on the lube rack.
23.  You think a VOLVO is part of woman's anatomy.
24.  You've been too drunk to FISH.
25.  You've had a rag for a gas cap.
26.  You've even used a Weed Eater inside.
27.  You have shackles on the rear of your car.
28.  Your idea of sexual foreplay is telling you female partner "GET YOUR
     CLOTHES OFF B*TCH".
29.  You wear white socks with black pants and have a car with a rebel flag
     in the back.



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