HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: trumpins@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu (Barbara Trumpinski)
Subject: Re: Announcement!
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana
Date: Mon, 25 Jan 1993 03:05:29 GMT


>: 
>: >Jammer signals Mike that the Father's next drink is paid for.
>: 
>: "he's NOT going to play football!  he is going to be a computer jock
>: and master gamer, just like his old man..."  kitten grins to show
>: jammer she's not mad.
>: --
>:
>Jammer looks at Warrior, a baffled look on his face.

>"So,
>I can unnerstand being a master gamer..

>But...
>How does being a computer jock help him play football?"

>Jammer is puzzeled.


kitten giggles...."it doesn't....but that's okay.  he will be a wizard
at the terminal and on the field..."
--
***************************************************************************
conan the librarian a.k.a. kitten           /\ /\  barbara ann 
"my life's a soap opera, isn't yours?"      {=.=}
                                              ~   trumpins@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu 
"it's not easy being a cast iron bitch--it takes years of practice.
most people don't appreciate that.

Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: aaron@atlantis.uucp
Subject: Re: Announcement!
Organization: Atlantis Communications, Edmonton, AB, Canada
X-Newsreader: TIN [version 1.1 PL8]
Date: Sat, 23 Jan 1993 05:43:27 GMT

Barbara Trumpinski (trumpins@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu) wrote:
: "ah, but alfvaen," kitten pipes up...."young  andrew was named for
: andy offitt...creator of shadowspawn and world famous author and party
: animal (he likes my legs)  mr. offett always comes to chambanacon with
: wife and kids (his son just published a novel)..."

"I know of Andy Offutt, and he >is< my favourite Thieves' World author, and I
even like some of his other books.  So you've met him and he likes your legs,
eh?  Hmmm.  Homage is all well and fine, but why not name the boy Offutt?  Now
>there< is an original name.  Or, even better, Hanse?

"Does Offutt live near Shampoo-Banana, or does he have some other reason to
come to Chambanacon?  I just recall him talking about having a slow Texas
drawl..."

-- 
---Alfvaen(Still looking for "October's Baby")
"I tell everyone a different story...that way nothing's ever boring."              ---Jane Siberry
Current Album--Bill Cosby:200 M.P.H.
Current Read--Dave Duncan:The Reaver Road
From: siewert@matt.ksu.ksu.edu (Karl Siewert)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Descriptions...
Date: 22 Jan 1993 16:34:14 -0600
Organization: Kansas State University
NNTP-Posting-Host: matt.ksu.ksu.edu

dspeck@ee.ryerson.ca (DOUGLAS SPECK) writes:
>Hmmm, come to think about it, perhaps a standardized form of description
>would be in order, with a listing of Appearance, Favourite Drink, Place
>in the Bar, Birthdate, and Origin(city, country). On the other hand, 
>perhaps people would like to go about it in their own inimitable fashions...
>What do folks think? Feedback, please!

I like.  I'm about 6'2", with nondescript long brown hair and brown eyes.  I'm
dressed for the most part in brown suedes.  My weapons are behind the bar.  I
am still trying out drinks.  I sit on a barstool (brought it myself from the 
Taiwan On next door) near the new door in the darkest corner through which I 
entered.  My RL alter-ego was born on October 18th in 1971 in Virginia Beach, 
Virginia, but he's lived most of his life in Topeka, KS.  Now he lives in Hays,
KS (a veritable Disneyland for shutins) and posts from KSU.  Rie doesn't remem-
ber his birthday, but he's about 25ish.  He's from Greyhawk.  Little town 
called Haze.  Ever heard of it?

Love to all & a hug to T-bear.
Rie
-- 
/               James Riekar, barhopping yoyist, at your service              \
Impersonated at Fort Hays State by Karl G. Siewert, pretending to be at K-State
\                      address=siewert@matt.ksu.ksu.edu                       /
 \           Never underestimate the power of the truly eccentric.           /
From: snarf@access.digex.com (Sean Eustis)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: The Cracked Reflection..
Date: 28 Jan 1993 18:47:05 -0500
Organization: Express Access Online Communications, Greenbelt, MD USA
NNTP-Posting-Host: access.digex.com

>Taldin drains his glass.  
>"To... not being able to see oneself as others do...!"
>>Crash!!!<

Dreamweaver adds his glass after hearing Taldin's toast.

<<<Crash>>>
	"C'mere you.", and Dreamweaver reaches gently around the unicorn's
neck and hugs while scratching along his mane., "It'll be okay, trust me."

-- 
   	The Dreamweaver				Sean Eustis
			(snarf@access.digex.com)
       "...if only you could see what I've seen with your eyes."
From: braley@binkley.cs.mcgill.ca (The Didi-Sprite)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Didi's ill, again :-(
Date: 25 Jan 93 16:24:31 GMT
Organization: SOCS - Mcgill University, Montreal, Canada
Originator: braley@binkley.cs.mcgill.ca

In article <1993Jan22.222714.13697@wixer.cactus.org> parakeet@wixer.cactus.org (Jim Eikner) writes:
>
>Parakeet walks over with a steaming mug. It contains Trader Vic's recipe for
>Hot Buttered Rum: rum, butter, brown sugar, nutmeg, clove and a cinnamon
>stick as a swizzle...
>
>"Here. This won't cure anything but, after a few sips, you won't care..."
>
>He hands over the Miracle Fluid and returns to his two-top...
>

The Didi-Sprite accepts the mug gratefully, and after looking about
furtively, takes a sip:  "Ummmmmm!  Yum!  Now this is a Rx!  Thanks,
Parakeet!"  The -Sprite wiggles her toes, snuggles up against her
pillows and sighs a contented sigh.

----<--<@

The Didi-Sprite
Montreal * Canada

braley@binkley.cs.mcgill.ca
didi@geloser.login.qc.ca
From: keulen@csuvax1.csu.murdoch.edu.au (Splash!)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Haircut for Tanais
Date: 29 Jan 1993 02:12:23 GMT
NNTP-Posting-Host: csuvax1.csu.murdoch.edu.au

cliveg@cix.compulink.co.uk (Clive Grace) writes:

>TITLE: A Haircur for Tanais

>Cool! Now, my friends you can scritch me anywhere you like -- from 
>behind, in front, from the sides, you can even doff my mop on top...

"Great!" Splash rushes over, "Doff, doff, doff; scritch scritch!"



--
		Splash!		*To love is to LIVE!*
   (aka Mike van Keulen -- e-mail: keulen@csuvax1.murdoch.edu.au)
From: schweppe@acs.bu.edu (Edmund Schweppe)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Announcement!
Date: 22 Jan 93 17:20:13 GMT
Organization: Boston University, Boston, MA, USA

kitten replies to Tanais:

>tanais:
>>I noticed this line apeared in your .sig Kitten.
>>> "it's not easy being a cast iron bitch--it takes years of practice.
>>> most people don't appreciate that.
>>I can't honestly imagine you -- of all people -- calling yourself a 
>>cast-iron bitch.
>>A furry hug for you
>"a but you haven't seen me in 'bite mode'...and i rust when i get wet.
>but if you still don't see it, maybe i need to practice more, non?"

"Gee, kitten, good thing you waited until after the New Year's Eve 
Underwater Pizza Party (tm) to change your .sig line," comments Merlinvin.
"It's impossible to get any use out of a rusted-up winch... although, I
guess that if enough oily pizzas dripped on you, you might have loosened
up enough to be of service."

__________________________________________________________________________
Ed Schweppe o/k/a Merlinvin - schweppe@acs.bu.edu,
    (or for faster replies)   eschweppe%drcoa1.decnet@drcvax.af.mil
All standard disclaimers (also datclaimers and deotherclaimers) apply.
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: pel@maximo.enet.dec.com (Phillip E lujan)
Subject: Re: Delilah tries her hand at this...
Reply-To: pel@maximo.enet.dec.com (Phillip E lujan)
Organization: Digital Equipment Corporation
Date: Tue, 26 Jan 1993 17:24:14 GMT


In article <2B647F7C.2965@news.service.uci.edu>, eaeu282@orion.oac.uci.edu (Ching-I Chen) writes:
[Rambling first post - too little sleep can do that - deleted...]
|>	She smiles joyously at everything and everyone in sight and readies
|>herself for the throwing.
|>
|>	But before she can commit the act, her eyes roll in their sockets,
|>cross, and then close.  She falls straight back onto the floor, glass still 
|>in hand.  As she lies there, a faint smile emerges on her lips.
|>
|>	Eyes still shut, she mumbles again, for only the close at hand to
|>decipher: "This is my first post, and i hope i...."  Her words trail off.
|>
|>    	And there, in the middle of the bar, she sleeps.

Starknight walks over to the sleeping Delilah, touching his tanglebomb with a
gloved hand on the way past.  It transforms back into the starburst from the
chest of his uniform.  Stepping up to the sleeping lady, he mutters, "Tangler
mode off; blanket mode activate."  As the patrons watch, once again the star-
burst elongates and stretches, forming a sheet of silvery material.

"Sleep, Delilah.  We'll be here when you wake up, and this is the safest
Place you could be right now..."  Starknight covers her with the blanket,
then draws up a chair and sits down, to be near when she awakes...

Starknight
spr@abo.dec.com
Disclaimer:  Huh?  What'd I say?

Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: daq@fc.hp.com (Doug Quarnstrom)
Subject: Re: Descriptions...
Date: Fri, 22 Jan 1993 19:42:26 GMT
Organization: SPUGE
X-Newsreader: TIN [version 1.1.8 PL6]

DOUGLAS SPECK (dspeck@ee.ryerson.ca) wrote:
: Feedback, please!

Feedback strikes me as another euphemistic phrase whose alternate
expressions might include:  chunder, hurl, spew, etc.

doug
From: lazuli@byron.u.washington.edu (Fred Sloniker)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Descriptions...
Date: 23 Jan 1993 05:11:52 GMT
Organization: University of Washington, Seattle
NNTP-Posting-Host: byron.u.washington.edu
Summary: Okie dokie...

In a previous article, Karl Siewert wrote:

>We WaNt To KnOw WhAt YoUr BiRtHdAy AnD fAvOrItE dRiNk ArE.

(grin)  All right.  My birthday is March 11, and my favorite drink is a Fizzy
Orange Soda.  Orangina, if you've got it, and not Pepsi's brand-- their
commercials offend human intelligence.

				---Fred M. Sloniker, writing for
				   L. Lazuli R'kamos, who likes his orange
				      sodas with real orange pulp
				   lazuli@u.washington.edu
From: ekho@cybernet.cse.fau.edu (amanda rothman)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Computers
Date: 26 Jan 93 22:35:50 GMT
Organization: Cybernet BBS, Boca Raton, Florida


  Ekho picks up something which has been described as "a box of wires and
flashing lights" and places it on the table next to her.  With a look of
utter innocence she queries it, "ORAC, why are all computers male?"

  The box of lights flashes and whirrs, attempting to keep from answering
but finally is forced to respond seeing as Ekho programmed it to.  "I do not
know, why are all computers male?"

  The innocent look is replaced by an evil grin, "Because you always have to
tell it what to do."

  The box gives a final whine and shuts itself off...

                    Yours in Time and Space
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: pope@physics.su.OZ.AU (The Nightstalker)
Subject: Re: The Nightstalker Delurks (finally)
Organization: School of Physics, University of Sydney, Australia
Date: Thu, 28 Jan 1993 00:33:16 GMT

In article <1993Jan27.060659.23538@ucc.su.OZ.AU> ablanch@physics.su.OZ.AU (Shonias) writes:
>"Welcome back Nightstalker, I still owe you an RL hug, but 
>for now you will have to make-do with a VR elf-hug."
>Shonias wraps her friend in a the biggest hug she can manage.
>
A small tear comes to The Nightstalker's eye.

"RL friends are good to have, as are RL hugs.  VR, will do."  
He returns the hug with vigour.


--
Mick Pope,                                          |      "On Christ the
Sir Frank Packer Dept of Theoretical Physics,   ----|----   solid rock I
School of Physics, University of Sydney,            |       stand, all other
Sydney, Australia, 2006.  (02) 692 3241             |       ground is sinking
                                                    |       sand." - C. Wesley
                                                    | 
And the comment for today is:  
          
"All that we see or seem
Is but a dream within a dream."
                        - A Dream within A Dream, Poe
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
From: jmpierce@whale.st.usm.edu (Jimmy Malcolm Pierce)
Subject: Re: One quick question
Organization: University of Southern Mississippi
Date: Tue, 26 Jan 1993 13:28:45 GMT

>Be nice... some of us grew up on Blake's Seven. Low budget SF... but 
>what about the dailogue
>Vila: I have thei terrible headache...
>Avon: have you considered amputation?
>
>MerryTail - Make Mine Deadpan

   "Yup, they should have voted Avon as Mr. Congeniality... Not !" Linda.

   "I have been told that the BBC considers Blake's 7 to be a kids show.
I know that here in the US its considered 'B-Movie' sci-fi !" DJ. :-)

-- 
         Jim Pierce Bach. of Sci. in Applied Computer Science USM 
             jmpierce@whale.st.usm.edu  Disclaimer: Standard.
                      Video. Peter Gabriel: Steam
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Culinary Peculiarity (was Re: Dan'l hits Australia)
From: olson@husc8.harvard.edu (Chip Olson)
Date: 24 Jan 93 21:31:41
 <C16Mt4.7wC@hfglobe.intel.com><OLSON.93Jan21225321@husc8.harvard.edu> <C19ryr.ABt@hfglobe.intel.com>
Organization: Spam-On-A-Rope Inc.
In-reply-to: hilp@hfglobe.intel.com's message of 22 Jan 93 19:11:11 GMT

In article <C19ryr.ABt@hfglobe.intel.com> hilp@hfglobe.intel.com (Robin Rosenbaum) writes:

>In article <OLSON.93Jan21225321@husc8.harvard.edu> olson@husc8.harvard.edu (Chip Olson) writes:
>>
>>"And you eat them with complete radishment, I assume?"
>
>"I condiment you on your quick understanding.  Re additons to burgers,
>my thought is 'lettuce indulge' (which can get me into quite a pickle)!"

"Well, I relish these pun wars, but the competition's too intense... I don't
think I can quite cut the mustard.  Maybe one day I'll ketchup."

--
-Chip Olson. | olson@husc.harvard.edu | ceo@{gnu.ai,silver.lcs}.mit.edu
This article is a natural product.  The slight variations in spelling and
grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to
be considered flaws or defects.
From: schweppe@acs.bu.edu (Edmund Schweppe)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: a Punday delurking
Date: 26 Jan 93 22:35:52 GMT
Organization: Boston University, Boston, MA, USA

Thrya writes:

>In article <108228@bu.edu>, schweppe@acs.bu.edu (Edmund Schweppe) wrote:

[ puns & peanuts - sacrificed to bandwidth ]

>> "Having never massaged a shapeshifter before, I am slightly curious..."

>Thyra grins. "Only -slightly- curious? Well, I like good massage as well as
>the next girl. Care to give me one? I'd love a full-body massage right
>about now, followed by a good soak in the hot tub."

"I would be overjoyed", replies Merlinvin, helping Thyra onto the table.
Starting with the cyan-blue scalp, Merlinvin's magic fingers slowly work
their way up and down Thyra's body, soothing and easing tensions away,
oiling bare skin (but not the golden-brown fur) and thoroughly relaxing
feline muscles ...  For the next hour, the only sound to be heard from
that part of the Place is a low purring, which fades into the background
as time passes.  Finally, Merlinvin lifts the limp, half-asleep Thyra from
the table, carries her to the hot tub and sets her in the water.  Turning
to Jason, Merlinvin asks, "And how about you, sir?"

__________________________________________________________________________
Ed Schweppe o/k/a Merlinvin - schweppe@acs.bu.edu,
    (or for faster replies)   eschweppe%drcoa1.decnet@drcvax.af.mil
All standard disclaimers (also datclaimers and deotherclaimers) apply.
From: figmo@netcom.com (Lynn Gold)
Subject: Re: Culinary Peculiarity (was Re: Dan'l hits Australia)
Organization: The Burn the Candle at Both Ends Club
Date: Thu, 28 Jan 1993 00:56:06 GMT

In article <1993Jan23.040629.19775@ttinews.tti.com> hollombe@polymath.tti.com (The Polymath) writes:
>"The only way I like avocado is hanging on a tree, preferably in someone
>else's garden.  Avocado is one of the few evil fruits (coconut is the only
>other one I can think of) that contain unhealthful amounts of fat.
>
>"Unfortunately, here on the left coast they insist on putting it in or on
>just about everything.  Blech."

"Yeah, I've noticed.

"When I first came out here, I worked at a place where the restaurant
in the industrial park had a very "Californian" menu that read
approximately like this (I don't remember the prices off-hand; I avoid
salads like the bubonic plague):

    Salads
    ------

    Avocado stuffed with tuna salad

    Tuna salad with avocado

    Avocado stuffed with crab salad

    Crab salad with avocado

    Avocado stuffed with potato salad

    Potato salad with avocado

    Avocado stuffed with macaroni salad

    Macaroni salad with avocado

    Avocado stuffed with egg salad

    Egg salad with avocado

    Avocado stuffed with ham salad

    Ham salad with avocado

    Avocado stuffed with turkey salad

    Turkey salad with avocado

    Avocado stuffed with chicken salad

    Chicken salad with avocado

    Avocado stuffed with pasta salad

    Pasta salad with avocado

    Avocado stuffed with fruit salad

    Fruit salad*

    *Avocado $.50 extra


"No, I'm not making this up!"

--Lynn
-- 
Lynn Gold				           figmo@netcom.com

Worst pickup line of the decade:
   "You're so cute, so pretty.  I've got the beer if you've got the
time, you know.  I've been all around the world.  Would you like to
see some human remains and intestines I have in the back of my van?"
From: maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk (Mary Branscombe)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: Peace-ties for firearms
Date: 27 Jan 93 09:42:00 GMT
Reply-To: maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk


MerryTail pricks up her tail at the sound of peace ties.  She 
concentrates hard - she's going to need some help with this one... 
and two ghostly figures appear in front of her.
"Rhienessed, Raphael! thank you"
"Always glad to help, dream sister" replies the tall blonde woman. 
There's perhaps half an inch between here and her companion, a man 
with crisp, curly black hair, high cheek-bones and fox-brown eyes. 
Like Rhienessed, he wears two swords slung on belts about his hips- 
look closely and you might see metal inlays and engraving on the 
blades. Rhienessed herself has MerryTail's eyes, but she's far 
taller, with ash-blonde hair swept back into a plait that falls below 
her waist and a longer, older face.
"If you're not in a hurry, my dears, I'll buy you a drink. But first, 
I should like to borrow a sword from the SwordMasters of Zill."
Rhienessed unbuckles a sword and Raphael attempts to fit it to 
MerryTail's hips... but not only does the sword come down to her 
ankles, the belt won't go over the black belt she already wears, with 
a handfull of pens stuck through the buckle. MerryTail settles for 
carrying the scabbard in both hands, pulls out a scarf from her 
pocket and leads her dream sister and Raphael over to Maraud's table
"Maraud m'dear. I think you're right person to ask to show me how to 
put a peace tie on Rhiennessed's sword, no? After all, I believe you 
did mention coming from a place called the Tie One On?"

She backs away quickly and leads her friends to the bar before they 
return whence they came (big imagination, I've got ;-) )
+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+
| Organisation: Me? You're joking, right?   |maryb@cix.compulink.co.uk |
|                                           |                          |
|I know I type "teh" for "the" My fingers have their own accent ;-)    |
|                           OK, I just can't type ;-))                 |
+-------------------------------------------+--------------------------+
From: eesshlgb@gdr.bath.ac.uk (S H L G Bisson)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: A hectic look at the life of an active bibliophile...
Date: 27 Jan 93 13:47:15 GMT
Organization: School of Electrical Engineering, University of Bath, UK

The cartoon mouse has laid aside the ACME catalogue for the moment, and is
flipping through a bulging filofax.

"Saturday, Tuesday, Thursday... Hmm. Shaping up to be a good week!"

He grins, and takes a sip of his drink.

"Saturday, MaryTail and I wandered (meandered, even) through the Welsh Marches
to that most wonderful of places, Hay on Wye. Even though it was blowing a cold
gale, nothing was to keep us from that bibliophiliac Mecca.

"Worth it, too! Mary found a large pile of Peter Cheney crime novels, I found
one of the Daniel Keys Morans I'm looking for (anyone seen _Emerald Eyes_ or
_The Ring_? - as those are the two I need to find!). Not only that, but I
came across a mint 1st edition hardcover of my favourite hard Sf novel,
George Zebrowski's _Macrolife_ - not only that, but it was inscribed to Brian 
Aldiss, and contained photocopies of the reviews and a proof cover for the
paperback! No way was that worth 6 pounds! So I bought it...

"Then yesterday afternoon I had a phone call from a friend in Bath Sf. Anne
Rice was to be talking and signing in Bristol that night... We managed to
get together a car load, and wandered off to hear the author of the Vampire
Chronicles discuss her work - and to get our books signed!

"Anne Rice - wow! And that's not all - on Thursday it's Bruce Sterling! Out
come even more books... And another trip to Bristol.

"Oh, the hectic life of the bibliophile. It's fun though, and it's good to
meet writers who's works you love."

Ignatz picks up the copy of _The Hacker Crackdown_ that lies beside his chair.

"Better finish this by tomorrow..."

He grins at MaryTail, and returns to his reading.

----Ignatz Mouse/Simon H Le G Bisson----sf-bibliophile----Reunite Pangaea!----
From: siewert@matt.ksu.ksu.edu (Karl Siewert)
Newsgroups: alt.callahans
Subject: Re: bird on ice... (LONG POST) *>
Date: 26 Jan 1993 16:17:44 -0600
Organization: Kansas State University
NNTP-Posting-Host: matt.ksu.ksu.edu

<KZAHLLER@MIAMIU.BITNET> writes:

>Magda stands for a moment, unsure of herself, in front of Feather.
>She fears she may be felt presumptuos (or even--Heaven forbid--
>utterly boring and a total buttinsky), and that she may have
>made the small gray bird unhappy.  She blushes with the
>realization that she just spent entirely too much of everyone's
>time running her mouth off and starts to go back to her corner
>sit down and shut up again.

Don't you dare!!!  That was the most beautiful outpouring of true emotion 
I have heard in a very long time.  It seems obvious to me that you have taken
great strides just by the fact that you were able to tell us this and that 
you care so much about Feather.  You cannot _truly_ care for others unless you 
care for yourself.  You said that yourself.  I wish that I could RL hug both
of you.  Ever since reading that first Feather post, I have been trying to 
think of what I could say.  I wanted to help, but I have a rule about advice.
If at all possible, I don't give it, not because I don't have something to say,
but because advice tends to take initiative away from the advisee.  (Rie kicks
a soapbox away frantically)  ANYWAY!!  I have had a difficult life.  Not 
nearly as bad as some, but still, nobody survives life without scars.  I cry 
for you, both of you, and for me.  I wrap you in a huge pair of VR arms and beg
the gods to help us help ourselves, and each other.  I love you, more than just
the words, and I will do anything I can for you.  That goes for all in the 
Place (even you, Slash) and for all in my RL, and especially for me, because
that's what it's all about.

To healing, wherever it is found.

>>>CRASH<<<

Rie


-- 
/               James Riekar, barhopping yoyist, at your service              \
Impersonated at Fort Hays State by Karl G. Siewert, pretending to be at K-State
\                      address=siewert@matt.ksu.ksu.edu                       /
 \           Never underestimate the power of the truly eccentric.           /