HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: s9000289@csdvax.csd.unsw.edu.au (Cameron Hooper)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Alzheimer Joke
Date: 5 Jan 93 16:54:47 +1000
Organization: University of New South Wales

Heard this one on the radio

Three old men are sitting together around the breakfast table.  The first
man gets up and says he off to take a bath.  He goes upstairs, turns the 
water on the take a bath.  Just as he was about to get in he pauses: "Was
I going to have a bath, or had I just finished?", he asks.  In confusion
he calls downstairs to his mates for help.  The second old man gets up
and walks up the stairs towards the bathroom.  He pauses, "Was I going
to give help or to get help", he asks.  He also calls to the last man
for help.  "Thank Goodness I don't have that problem", he says, "Touch
wood", knocking his knuckles on the wooden table.  "Now was that the
front door or the back door", he asks.


-- 
************************************************************************
*  Cameron Hooper                        University of New South Wales *
*  s9000289@csdvax.csd.unsw.oz.au                                      *
************************************************************************
From: Alan.Holmes@brunel.ac.uk (Alan J Holmes)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: READ MY LIPS...
Date: 5 Jan 93 15:31:23 GMT
Organization: Brunel University, West London, UK

In article <C0CDy9.80q@srgenprp.sr.hp.com> marsh@sad.hp.com (Marshall Ward) writes:
>Robyn Clark (Robyn_Clark@mindlink.bc.ca) wrote:
>:         If there is a moderator on "rec.humor" why the fuck isn't he (she or
>: it) doing his (her or it's) job by removing ALL offensive (non-humourous)
>: material.
>  
>To my knowledge, rec.humor is not a moderated group. 
>
>: crap and it's NOT on rec.humor so stick it where it belongs.  I can just
>: imagine what would happen if I attempted to post a nice juicy adult joke to
>: the religious group.
>
>Hey Robyn, no flame intended, but,
>
>How about posting your "nice, juicy adult joke" at the end of your flame?
>
>I want to read humor too and there was none in your post.

No humor, but a lot of sense.

Regards

Alan Holmes
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: 6881300@LMSC5.IS.LMSC.LOCKHEED.COM
Subject: Re: Request: Computer Languages
Organization: Lockheed Missiles & Space Company, Inc.
Date: Mon, 04 Jan 93 13:07:52 PST

>
>I'm looking for humorous list of computer languages.
>
>John Andrusiak - umandru1@umanitoba.ca

FORTRAN II             A Model T Ford.  Once it was king of the road.

FORTRAN IV             A Model A Ford.

FORTRAN 77             A 6-cylinder Ford Fairlane with standard
                       transmission and no seat belts.

COBOL                  A delivery van.  It's bulky and ugly, but it
                       does the work.

BASIC                  A second-hand Rambler with a rebuilt engine
                       and patched upholstery.  Your dad bought it
                       for you to learn to drive.  You'll ditch the
                       car as soon as you can afford a new one.

Modula II              A Volkswagon Beetle with a trailer hitch.

LISP                   An electric car.  It's simple and slow.

FORTH                  A go-cart.

LOGO                   A kiddie's replica of a Rolls Royce.  Comes
                       with a real engine and a working horn.

APL                    A double-decker bus.  It takes rows and
                       columns of passengers to the same place all
                       at the same time.  But it drives only in
                       reverse gear and is instrumented in Greek.

Ada                    An army-green Mercedes-Benz staff car.  Power
                       steering, power brakes, and automatic trans-
                       mission are all standard.  No other colors
                       or options are available.  If it's good enough
                       for the generals, it's good enough for you.

PL/I                   A Cadillac convertible with automatic
                       transmission, a two-tone paint job, whitewall
                       tires, chrome exhaust pipes, and fuzzy dice
                       hanging in the windshield.

Cordially,
............................................................................
Roy Sette
rsette@lmsc.lockheed.com
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: randal@cs.UAlberta.CA (Randal Peters)
Subject: Re: scientist joke list
Organization: University of Alberta, Edmonton, Canada
Date: Mon, 11 Jan 1993 23:03:42 GMT

jake@hplvec.LVLD.HP.COM (Chris Jacobsen) writes:

>> mueller@iwf.mabp.ethz.ch (Mueller Beat) writes:
>>i am looking for a list which contains jokes about scientists of the
>>typus : 'a mathematician, an engineer and a physicist...'
>>zosh

Read this one on here a while back. Thought it was worth repeating.

Q. What is the worst thing about buying a Mathematician's product?

A. The 100 page Proof of Purchase that comes with it.


Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: ramirez@spock.uucp (Andreas Orphanides)
Subject: Re: Seriously, a joke.
Organization: Choate Rosemary Hall
Date: Fri, 8 Jan 1993 22:48:01 GMT

In article <1993Jan6.223225.24170@mcshub.dcss.mcmaster.ca> Chris O'Donovan <odonovan@physun.physics.mcmaster.ca> writes:
>In article <3300313@hplvec.LVLD.HP.COM> Greg Goebel,
>gvg@hplvec.LVLD.HP.COM writes:
>>   Wile E. Coyote at the Acme Online Support Organization
>For The SouthWest
>>
>>                     "ACME -- The Name You Can Trust!"
>
>Did you know that ACME is an acronym?
>
>A
>Company that
>Makes
>Everything

Is not! it's greek for " high point", fool child!




Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: garrett@Ingres.COM (WHEN ALL ELSE FAILS, READ THE INSTRUCTIONS)
Subject: Re: Rudolf's nose is dimming
Summary: Another alternative 
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.4-b1  
Keywords: 
Organization: ASK Computer Systems, Ingres Product Division
Date: 6 Jan 93 03:19:19 GMT

In article <hohoho@northpole.org>, santa@northpole.org                                         writes...
>Attention all Christmas lovers and fans of joly 'ol Saint Nic!!!!
>We have a crisis on our hands.  Rudolf's nose is slowly dimming!
>We require more hope in the world to light it back up!  Do what
>you can to assist.  Give money to the homeless, be nice to your
>mother, give an ex-girlfriend a kiss, whatever your heart will
>allow.
> 
I'll be glad to kiss someone else's ex-girlfriend. Does that count.

>                                HO HO HO
>                                SANTA
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: bstdenis@mailbox.fwrdc.rtsg.mot.com (Brian St. Denis)
Subject: Re: GET BRET WEIR I SAID! (read)
Organization: Fort Worth Research and Development Center, Motorola, Inc.
Date: Mon, 4 Jan 1993 15:55:48 GMT

In article <1993Jan3.144552.1@woods.ulowell.edu> mcduffeek@woods.ulowell.edu writes:
>I haven't read any messages in this newsgroup (I just posted this message),
>but I want to see how many people have actually heard of this underground
>tape of the funniest phone pranks I've ever heard.  I'm pretty sure it comes
>from New York City or in that vicinity and the only way to describe it is that
>they mention the name Bret Weir in it, John Musatcha, and Frank Rizo.  In
>one prank they call up a doctor's office that does hemmoroid laser treatment,
>and another they call an auto mechanics office.  I won't go into it in that
>much detail, but if you've hear it, you know what I mean.  The tape, I've
>been told, is one of five and I only have one.  If someone has these other
>tapes or has heard of them, E-Mail me what you've heard.  I'm dying to
>hear the rest of the tapes.  Please E-Mail, because for some unknown reason
>I am unable to read messages on this group.
>
>Thanks again...
>
>-- 
>  =====             Keith "Overtime" McDuffee            PHI KAPPA SIGMA

Yes, I've heard it and I can probably get a copy of it.  If anyone cares??
Send E-mail.

It wasn't THAT funny.

-Brian
-- 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Brian St. Denis                       | "Will administer for food."   -JLRU
Computer/Network Administration       | e-mail: bstdenis@fwrdc.rtsg.mot.com
Fort Worth Research and Design Center | phone:               (817) 232-6129
Motorola Inc.                         | digital pager:       (214) 835-0916
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: arthurc@sfsuvax1.sfsu.edu (Arthur Chandler)
Subject: Re: New Internet Farsides!
Organization: California State University, Sacramento
Date: Wed, 6 Jan 1993 01:40:04 GMT

  Here's one for people who don't "get" the humor in The Far Side (yes,
such exist):
  Scene: a Classroom.  Students are writing and watching the professor
intently.  Taped to his blackboard is a blow-up of a Far Side Cartoon,
which show a farmer holding up a chicken and talking to a seated dog.
The caption is unreadable.  The professor is pointing to the cartoon.
On the blackboard, written in chalk, we see the words "SMILE HERE" with
a big arrow pointing to the chicken.  Another arrow leads from "SMILE
AGAIN" to the dog. A third arrow points to the caption and says "LAUGH
HERE."
  The caption for the whole scene is "Far Side Appreciation 101."
From: gb03@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu (GEORGE PHILIP BLUHM)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: OXYMORONS
Date: 12 Jan 93 21:44:06 GMT
Organization: Lehigh University

In article <1iss3kINNc8p@hpscit.sc.hp.com>, guyh@hpubvwa.nsr.hp.com (Guy Hyde) w
rites:
>Vida Morkunas (vida@mdavcr.mda.ca) wrote:
>: The latest and newest oxymoron on television happened this past weekend,
>: regarding the new Star-Trek spin-off, Deep Space Nine.  The show had
>: been "premiering" all week on different networks, but the clincher came
>: when one of the channels decided to show the pilot for a second time.
>: The booming voice-over proudly announced:
>
>: "Be sure not to miss the ENCORE PREMIERE of Deep Space Nine!!!"
>
>
>
>Heard last night on the local news -
>       "Well, this looks like 'De Ja Vu' again."
>


Yogi Berra said it first.
 "This is Deja Vu all over again"

 Phylee THEE MacNasty

 
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: too much money is hazardous to your health
From: babar+@pitt.edu (Jonggu Moon)
Date: 9 Jan 93 21:59:56 GMT
Distribution: na
Organization: University of Pittsburgh


If elvis had been a middle income worker
he'd probably be alive today.
From: cooper@seismo.CSS.GOV (Dale Cooper)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: HAPPY BIRTHDAY ELVIS
Date: 8 Jan 93 15:59:55 GMT


                                /\\\\\\\\\\
                              ///\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\                                
                             ///\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\                              
                            /////\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\                               
                          ///////  \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\                              
                          |||||||    \\\\\\\\\\\\                               
                          |||||||\    ~~~~~~~~   \
                         ||||| |||   ~~~~  ~~~~  |
                         ||||| |||\   (x) \ (x)  ||
                        |||||  ||||        \     |\
                         ||||  ||||\        \    ||\
                         ||||| ~~~~~~     --/   ~~||
                         ||||||       ( /^^__   |
                          |||||   \     \___ \  |
                          ||||||   \     --     /
                           /XXXXXXX\  \_____ __/ 
                          /XXXXXXXX/X\       /XXX                               
                         /XXXXXXXX/XXXX\ @@ /XXXX|
                        /XXXXXXXX/xxxxxx\@@/XXXXXX\                             
                       /--------/XXXXXXXX\/XXXXXXXXX\                           

                    HAPPY 58th BIRTHDAY ELVIS!  01-08-35 
                            LONG LIVE "THE KING"

Xref: sparky rec.humor:37393 rec.arts.movies:36604
From: bchurch@oucsace.cs.ohiou.edu (Robert Church)
Newsgroups: rec.humor,rec.arts.movies
Subject: Re: New Pepto-Bismol Ad
Date: 5 Jan 93 12:35:53 GMT
Organization: Ohio University School of Art. Athens

In article <1ia80vINNe8q@hpscit.sc.hp.com> guyh@hpubvwa.nsr.hp.com (Guy Hyde) writes:
>
>How's about  "Exodus"
>	     "Five Easy Pieces"
>	     "Thunderball"
>	     "Fireball 400"

How about Highlander II. Especially with the sound zapped off like I do
with all commercials. No voiceover, just a guy getting up and holding his
stomach.
From: adam@castle.ed.ac.uk (Adam Hamilton)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Far Side
Date: 11 Jan 93 16:36:21 GMT
Organization: Edinburgh University

In article <1993Jan7.123523.1@vaxc> accjjs@vaxa.hofstra.edu writes:
:My favorite Far Side is the one where there is a little boy pushing furiously
:
:on the door to "Midvale School for the Gifted" with a huge sign above it that
:
:reads......... 
:
:
:		      ..........PULL 

	Ah, but a better cartoon is the one showing three doors of which
the side ones are marked Pull and Push.  the bloke in the middle is busting
a gut at the one marked
				LIFT
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: viking@iastate.edu (Dan Sorenson)
Subject: Re: Request: Poem about a Tree. (not limerick)
Organization: Iowa State University, Ames IA
Date: Tue, 5 Jan 1993 06:43:15 GMT

gilmore@venice.sedd.trw.com (Larry Gilmore) writes:

>>	I think that I shall never see
>>	a billboard lovely as a tree.
>>	Indeed, unless the billboards fall
>>	I'll never see a tree at all.
>>				-- not mine
>                                   ^^^^^^^^<---Ogden Nash

	Correct!  Then there is the one I saw in a MAD magazine
several years ago during my misspent youth.  I do remember:

	I think that I shall never see
	A poem tricky as a tree
	A tree that loafs around all day
	while I must kill its bugs with spray
	a tree who's mighty roots are pressed
	against my basement wall with zest

	Yes only God can make a tree
	But I can make a stump with glee.

If anybody has that back-issue of MAD, it deserves a posting.

< Dan Sorenson, DoD #1066 z1dan@exnet.iastate.edu viking@iastate.edu >
<  ISU only censors what I read, not what I say.  Don't blame them.  >
<  "Are you *SURE* he's worth a Harley-Davidson?" -- my grandmother  >
< to my girlfriend, about me.  "I'd better not say" -- my girlfriend >
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: nicholso@pioneer.arc.nasa.gov (Melvin H. Nicholson YBH)
Subject: Re: RIDDLES (involving no survivors,bears,birds or bus drivers)
Organization: NASA Ames Res. Ctr. Mtn Vw CA 94035
Date: Thu, 7 Jan 1993 00:37:21 GMT

In article <1993Jan4.141951.9174@schbbs.mot.com> bstdenis@mailbox.fwrdc.rtsg.mot.com (Brian St. Denis) writes:
>In article <1993Jan1.172834.15566@rigel.econ.uga.edu> skip@rosalyn.stat.uga.edu (Skip Gundlach) writes:
>>In article <1992Dec31.132325.1277@mwk.uucp> richardsro@mwk.uucp writes:
>>>bradj@oakhill.sps.mot.com (Brad R. Johnson) writes:
>>>> 
>>>> As far as I know, a preposition is not something one can legally end a
>>>> sentence with.  [Other stuff which _was_ important to his post deleted...]
>>>
>It started out with "Never use a preposition to end a sentence with."
>
>And Samuel Clemens said, "Bad grammer is something up with which I will not put."
>
The line (in reference to his editor "fixing" his jounalistic
submissions so they would not end with prepositions) was:

"This is a tyrranny up with which I will not put!"

...but on a lighter note (true story):

A certain linguist was in the habbit of reading stories to his child
every night at bedtime.  The child adored the stories in general, but
there was one book that for whatever reason the child had taken a huge
disliking to.  One night, the father accidentally grabbed that book on
the way up to bed for story time, and upon seeing *the book* in his
fathers hand groweled:

"What did you bring the book I don't want to be read to out of up for?"

Try to say *that* without using a preposition at the end, eh?
(It's possible, but it will take most more than one try)

Mel


Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: julie@eddie.jpl.nasa.gov (Julie Kangas)
Subject: Re: READ MY LIPS (PART 2)
Organization: Jet Propulsion Laboratory, Pasadena, CA
Date: Thu, 7 Jan 1993 16:57:28 GMT

In article <19308@mindlink.bc.ca> Robyn_Clark@mindlink.bc.ca (Robyn Clark) writes:
>        Well thanks to all, I now know that rec.humor is NOT moderated which
>brings up another curious question.  With all the money being spent on
>education and the fact that most of the users here are enrolled in an
>institution of higher (and that in itself is questionable) learning, why is
>it that so many of these users do not either read or understand plain
>English?  

This is a worldwide computer net.  People in other continents post
here and their first language is not english.  Many others who
post from North American sites are immigrants who are still learning 
english.  Others have spelling and grammar mistakes and strange sentence
structure because they don't want to spend time fixing it.

A good idea is to watch a group for 3 months before posting anything
to it.  This gives you an idea of what's been said before, what
are appropriate topics, and what kind of people are posting to it.
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: bsmith@crustacean.osf.org (Bruce Smith)
Subject: Re: READ MY LIPS (PART 2)
Organization: Open Software Foundation
Date: Thu, 7 Jan 1993 21:38:48 GMT

In article <1993Jan7.165728.10874@llyene.jpl.nasa.gov> julie@eddie.jpl.nasa.gov (Julie Kangas) writes:
>
>A good idea is to watch a group for 3 months before posting anything
>to it.  This gives you an idea of what's been said before, what
>are appropriate topics, and what kind of people are posting to it.

3 MONTHS? Hell, we could all be dead in three months! A better idea is to
jump right in as hard and fast as you can, maybe shake things up a little.
Besides, in r.h., most everything's already been said before, but oh, is
it ever worth trudging through posting after repetitive posting after non-
funny posting to come across that occasional true gem!

I suppose I am now obligate to include a joke. Okay, here's one I've never seen
in r.h.

What is the similarity between Kinney Shoe Stores and the U.S. Post Office?



They both have 50,000 <optional racial slur deleted> loafers!

Bruce Smith
Newsgroups: rec.humor
From: DBP@ECLX.PSU.EDU (David B Perrussel)
Subject: ASCII Cows?
Organization: Penn State Engineering Computer Lab
Distribution: usa
Date: Mon, 11 Jan 93 14:23:26 GMT
X-News-Reader: VMS NEWS 1.24

Does anyone have access to the ASCII cow pics that someone posted
here a while back? A friend who doesn't have net access wants them. If you
have them, please post or e-mail me and I will forward it to him.
Thanks in advance.

"Diamond Dave" Perrussel
dbp@ecl.psu.edu
dbp@eclx.psu.edu
bg656@cleveland.freenet.edu
From: Alan.Holmes@brunel.ac.uk (Alan J Holmes)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: READ MY LIPS.....
Date: 5 Jan 93 15:38:06 GMT
Organization: Brunel University, West London, UK

In article <1993Jan5.001712.23471@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu> f005@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu writes:

>Quite your god damn bitching.  I don't think that your lanquage was
>appropriate for this f**king newsgroup.  So keep your god damn trap shut and
>just read the fu**ing humor!!!!!!!!!

That was just the point, there is NO fu**ing humor.

Regards

Alan Holmes
From: dag@col.hp.com (David Geiser)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: Blanc de Noir
Date: 7 Jan 1993 00:29:14 GMT
Organization: HP Colorado Springs Division
NNTP-Posting-Host: hplsdor.col.hp.com

philippe@cybernet.cse.fau.edu (Philippe Benichou) writes:
> I sorry, but "Blanc de Noir" does NOT mean "White or Black".... it 
> means... "White OF/FROM Black"... it doesn't make sense?!?

       Blanc de (Pinot) Noir
       white of (Pinot) Noir grapes
-- 
To know recursion, you must first know recursion.
--
From: GRS03109@CONRAD.APPSTATE.EDU (*GRS9999102)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: purity test?
Date: 13 Jan 1993 04:32:33 GMT
Organization: APPALACHIAN STATE UNIVERSITY
Distribution: world
NNTP-Posting-Host: stat.appstate.edu
X-News-Reader: VMS NEWS 1.24

Could someone please send me a copy of the purity test.  Any version
will do.  Thanx.
From: bvh@cse.unl.edu (Ben Hollingsworth)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Re: ASCII Enterprise
Date: 9 Jan 1993 08:45:24 GMT
Organization: University of Nebraska--Lincoln	
Distribution: world
NNTP-Posting-Host: cse.unl.edu
Keywords: ASCII Enterprise

bushey@griffin.emba.uvm.edu.uvm.edu (Gary Bushey) writes:

>Does anyone have the large USS Enterprise (the one that is listed sideways)?
>If so could someone either post/mail it so that I may use it as a joke for my
>manager?  Thanks.

Is this the one?

--------------------------- Achilles tendon - cut here -----------------------
From: benji@pnet01.cts.com (Brad Pennock)
Newsgroups: comp.sys.handhelds

[ irrelevant message deleted ]

                
                                           _______----_______
       Brad A. Pennock          ___---~~~~~.. ... .... ... ..~~~~~---___
    Astronaut In Training  _ ==============================================
 ________________________- .. ..   _--~~~~~-------____-------~~~~~
(____________________][__)____     -
   /       /____---~~~.. .. ..~~-_~ INET: benji@pnet01.cts.com
  <_____________________________-  ARPA: crash!pnet01!benji@nosc.mil
      ~~~~~~----__      UUCP: {hplabs!hp-sdd ucsd nosc}!crash!pnet01!benji
                  ~~~~~~~~~~~ HOME: 4382 Utah St.#1, San Diego 92104  

--------------------------- Achilles tendon - cut here -----------------------

>Gary Bushey               |  	If everyone is out to get you, being paranoid
>bushey@uvm.edu            |     is just a good idea!

Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they AREN'T after you!

				-- Obi-Wan

--
 |\_/|  AACK! ||                        ||  "Obi-Wan" (Ben Hollingsworth)
\'o.0'/       ||   Hey, I didn't        ||  MicroImages, Inc.  Lincoln, Nebraska
=(___)=       ||        vote for him!   ||  University of Nebraska - Lincoln
   U   PTHAT! ||                        ||  email:  bvh@cse.unl.edu
From: f005@ns1.cc.lehigh.edu
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: RE: simpsons
Date: 5 Jan 93 00:19:56 GMT
Organization: Lehigh University

How about  "Look around for Mike Hunt, you guys, anybody seen Mike Hunt."

Nice netting, Later!
                Skunk

                
Newsgroups: rec.humor,rec.arts.startrek.current
From: frank@fnbc.com (Frank Mitchell)
Subject: Re: DEEP SPACE 9 DRINKING GAME
Organization: First National Bank Of Chicago, Chicago IL, USA
Date: Tue, 12 Jan 93 18:07:05 GMT

In article <1993Jan11.222434.11790@ringer.cs.utsa.edu>  
thughes@lonestar.utsa.edu (Toby . Hughes) writes:
> In article <1993Jan11.221810.3901@infonode.ingr.com>  
andrew@ak8194.b23a.ingr.com writes:
> >How about a drink every time Data and the Liquid Guy exchange experiences
> >relating to not being human and not knowing their origins (yeah, I know
> >Data pretty much knows his already).
> >
> >OR, every time there is a guest appearance from STTNG or ST.
> >
> >OR, every time support beams fall during attack.

OR every time Kira shouts at someone or bangs furniture.  (This will get  
anybody drunk, very fast.)

> How about a drink every time one of these messages shows up on the wrong  
list?
> 
> Will you PLEASE delete rec.music.country.western from the distribution line?

Done.

--
Frank Mitchell,	Business Systems Analyst, First National Bank of Chicago
email:frank@fnbc.com (NeXTmail)

"'I am that merry wanderer of the night'?  I am that giggling, dangerous,  
totally bloody psychotic menace to life and limb, more like it."
-- Peaseblossom, _Sandman_ #19
From: chuahl@ocf.berkeley.edu (Chua HakLien)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: Life articles...
Date: 7 Jan 1993 17:05:56 GMT
Organization: U.C. Berkeley Open Computing Facility
NNTP-Posting-Host: whirlwind.berkeley.edu

Does anyone know where those really great Life *.* articles are stored?
Was there an ftp site for them, or has anybody out there kept them?
( Or knows who was the original poster... )

Chua
+==+
"My interest is in the future, because I am going to spend the rest
of my life there."
					- From Life 3.M
Newsgroups: rec.humor