HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
From: rone@girtab.usc.edu (Ron Echeverri)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: I'm dragging out the old T-shirt
Date: 23 Aug 1992 15:10:30 -0700
Organization: University of Southern California, Los Angeles, CA
NNTP-Posting-Host: girtab.usc.edu

In article <1992Aug23.193425.13653@news.duc.auburn.edu> horntho@eng.auburn.edu writes:
>today...The question I have is, why would Opus make a better veep than 
>Dannikins?  Just trying to fish for humorous replies...

- Because Opus isn't married to Marilyn Quayle.
- Because Opus doesn't golf.
- Because Opus likes herring and peanut butter sandwiches.
- Because Opus knows how to spell "Milquetoast".
- Because Opus knows he's a cartoon character.

5150
george bush, are you listening?

Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: dianem@boi.hp.com (Diane Mathews)
Subject: Re: Bye Bye Dan
Organization: Hewlett-Packard
Date: Tue, 1 Sep 1992 14:14:29 GMT

>>Is it just me, or does this overoptimism scare other people too? I think it's
>Overoptimism? Actually my previous post was drippingly sarcastic but I
>guess that doesn't translate too well over the net.

>Again, I DO appreciate your paying attention to all of this, but how can
>you be in a position to know just how frustrated Americans are with these
>clowns.  You may doubt it but you don't have all the facts, not living
>IN this country.

Well, then again, I'm quite concerned about the overoptimism.  I do live in
the US.  Having lived in the conservative zone most of my life I can see the
two idiots being re-elected.  At least I'd have this newsgroup...
From: sg@monsoon.com (Sunil Gupta)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: Audience cards? 
Date: Wed, 26 Aug 92 11:31:25 EDT
Organization: Monsoon Software, Inc.

bender@riscee.pko.dec.com (Patricia Bender) writes:

> convention join in with me.  This brought up the question:
> Was there someone holding cards telling the audience how to
> react?  Sort of like they sometimes do for stupid sitcoms?

Yes, I believe that I saw a clip on CNN showing how the waving
of these placards was coordinated. Apparently there was a group
leader for parts of each delegation who would be situated near
a bank of colored lights. When a light of a certain color came
on, that leader was responsible for making sure that the group
waved the corresponding placard.

Sunil Gupta
Monsoon Software, Inc.
sg@monsoon.com
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle,alt.politics.bush
From: grimoire@byron.u.washington.edu (John Greer)
Subject: Re: I...RON...NEE
Organization: University of Washington, Seattle
Date: Fri, 28 Aug 1992 19:05:45 GMT

In article <w268PB3w165w@monsoon.com> sg@monsoon.com (Sunil Gupta) writes:
>garrett@Ingres.COM (QUOTE OF THE YEAR) writes:
>
>> This is interesting. I knew Ronald "let's fire all the air-traffic controlers
>> Reagan was a member of the actors guild, but I didn't know he was a LEADER
>> of it. I seem to remember that around 86'-87' he crossed a picket line 
>> of his OWN union. What an increadible sell-out!
>
>There was a great book written in the '80's having to do with Reagan's
>ascent to power being propelled by a group of Hollywood execs at MCA.
>I *think* it was called "MCA, Ronald Reagan, and the Dark Side" or
>something to that effect. Anyway, the book detailed how these execs
>paid Reagan during his tenure as Chairman (?) of the Actor's Guild so
>that he would campaign for policies favorable to the studios rather
>than actors and also inform of "subversive" activities among actors.
>Quite a guy, huh?
>
>
>Sunil Gupta
>Monsoon Software, Inc.
>sg@monsoon.com

The title of the book is _Dark Victory_, if I'm recalling correctly.
Absolute must reading, IMHO.


Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: russ@math.okstate.edu (Horatio "Random" Hellpop)
Subject: Re: Quayle/Bush Competency?
Organization: Aggie? What precisely is an Aggie?
Date: Mon, 31 Aug 1992 01:59:01 GMT

In <1992Aug28.151409.2418@blaze.cs.jhu.edu> wilson@gauss.cs.jhu.edu (Dwight Wilson) writes:

>In article <8ebWisq00WBO41uYMz@andrew.cmu.edu> "Joshua M. Sabloff" <jsa5+@andrew.cmu.edu> writes:
>>Excerpts from netnews.alt.fan.dan-quayle: 27-Aug-92 Re: Quayle/Bush
>>Competency? by Eric Johnson@ccu.umanito 
>>> I second this as long as he sticks to McD's or some other place where you
>>> have no choice of what goes on your burger. Can you imagine the lineups 
>>> at Burger King or Wendy's while the managers fixed his screwups on orders
>>> with alternate toppings? Besides, it goes well with his lockstep mode of 
>>> thinking.
>>
>>No, I think Danoe would be quite efficient.  After all, he wouldn't
>>offer you a choice; he would put whatever the religious right feels
>>should go on your burger. :-)
>>

>And the company would save money, because he wouldn't be liberal with 
>the toppings.

>-Dwight

Imagine waiting for him to apply ketchup via the trickle-down method.

-- 
Russ "Random" Smith
+----===Comedy!  Sudden, violent comedy!===-----------russ@okstate.edu--------+
|  Godfather of the Random Gang; Diplomat of the Brotherhood of Evil MUDders  |
+-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+
From: dfriedman@misvax.mis.arizona.edu (D R Friedman)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: Bye Bye Dan
Date: 31 Aug 92 11:07:00 GMT
Distribution: world,local
Organization: University of Arizona MIS Department
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.41

In article <6016@transfer.stratus.com>, cme@ellisun.sw.stratus.com (Carl Ellison) writes...
>In article <s6i9PB1w165w@fennec.sccsi.com> popec@fennec.sccsi.com (William C. Barwell) writes:
>>  So what is going to happen to this thread when Dan is gone?  Who are we 
>>gonna laugh at?  Who is going to be the new Dan Quayle for the next 4 
>>years.
> 
> 
>Never fear.
> 
>Reagan and Bush left us a rich legacy.
> 
>To start with, there's Clarence Thomas.

Then there's Orrin Hatch and Newt Gingrich of Congress

Denny F@misvax.mis.arizona.edu
-------------------------------------
Imagination is the beginning of creation.  You imagine what you desire, you 
will what you imagine, and at last you create what you will.
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: darkstar@milton.u.washington.edu (Alden Hackmann)
Subject: Re: I'm dragging out the old T-shirt
Organization: University of Washington
Date: Tue, 25 Aug 1992 16:49:51 GMT

"Joshua M. Sabloff" <jsa5+@andrew.cmu.edu> writes:


>Fergit Bill 'n' Opus... vote Calvin 'n' Hobbes!

I would, but then I would have to admit that I was a Calvinist...

Alden 

Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: garrett@Ingres.COM (QUOTE OF THE YEAR)
Subject: Re: Dan's a Democrat (sorry, wrong key)
Summary: 
News-Software: VAX/VMS VNEWS 1.4-b1  
Keywords: 
Organization: ASK Computer Systems, Ingres Product Division
Date: 1 Sep 92 02:34:52 GMT

In article <unrzc7.2.714996004@daphne.rrze.uni-erlangen.de>, unrzc7@daphne.rrze.uni-erlangen. writes...
> 
>After watching this newsgroup for quite some time, I do have a really nasty 
>suspicion. Dan can't possibly be a Republican, he has to be some kind of 
>brilliantly planted Democrat spy, helping Clinton/Gore to win this year's 
>election. I mean - if Dannyboy is a complete idiot, nobody would have 
>elected him (or that man who chose him as his VP). You wouldn't have, 
>wouldn't you? 

You have to think in terms of impeachment insurance.

>A concerned German
>Thomas
> 
>"What would Janna say about it?"

-Garrett
Date: Thu, 3 Sep 1992 20:16:26 EDT
From: Kurt Ludwick <KEL111@psuvm.psu.edu>
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: Abortion is Stealing! (was Re: DATELINE: Bush fucks up!)

In article <122000001@hpfcmdd.fc.hp.com>, sandya@hpfcmdd.fc.hp.com (Sandy A)
says:

>Bush/Quayle oppose abortion, but would support their family members who
>had one.

>This seems so bizarre to me.  Bush and Quayle seem to be saying "I don't
>believe in it personally, but I would let others make their own decision."

No. They are saying, "Even if my daughter were to do such a wrong and terrible
thing, I would not disown her or condemn her because I love her."

This makes a lot of sense to me.

They did NOT say (and they do not believe) that abortion should be legal for
their family, only.  That would not only be wrong, but it would be (much
less importantly) political suicide.

>But, hey, if my daughter/granddaughter wanted one, I'd support her! (BTW,
>what does support mean?  I won't disown her?  Won't try to talk her out of
>it?  Won't offer to take the baby?  Won't do a damn thing to stop what is
>supposedly the *murder* of their own flesh and blood?)

Well, you did kind of have it.  The way Bush answered the question (and I
think Quayle, also) was as if their daughter had already gone and HAD the
abortion, and what would they do?  Their answers made perfect sense.

>They are trying to have it both ways.  "Look, pro-lifers, it says right
>here in the platform we're against this evil thing!  But (wink-wink) we
>support "our" women if they decide to do it!

They will love those in their own families, unconditionally, no matter what.
To push a cliche, this is a "family value."

------------
Kurt Ludwick
------------
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: neeri@iis.ethz.ch (Matthias Neeracher)
Subject: Re: Alternative voting
Organization: Integrated Systems Laboratory, ETH, Zurich
Date: Wed, 26 Aug 1992 14:32:22 GMT

In article <1992Aug26.020743.15118@nmsu.edu> dward@scf.nmsu.edu (Dan Ward) writes:
>    I heard a quote that I like.  I'm not sure if it's correct.
>    Clinton:  "He [Bush] can run for first lady if he wants to,
>               but I'm NOT going to live with him."
>
>     Also, I remember a science fiction story I ready years ago
>     about some strange planet.  The president had total control
>     over everything.  There weren't regular elections, but there 
>     were voting booths stored around the country - and people 
>     could go in to vote anytime they liked.  The President was
>     like everyone else, except he had this really neat medalion
>     he wore around his neck which was a symbol of his authority.
>
>     If someone voted "yes", then he knew he was on the right
>     track.  If anyone voted "no", the medalion would explode and
>     blow his head off.    I think the person who voted no had to become
>     president then.

This is probably "A ticket to Trania" by Robert Sheckley, which describes a
wonderfully unbureaucratic and just world. A neat feature was the welfare
system: There was no welfare, but armed robbery was legal :-)

Matthias

-----
Matthias Neeracher                                      neeri@iis.ethz.ch
   "You think people really worship the devil?"
   "Sure. It's the perfect religion--you fuck up, you go to heaven"
                                     -- Andrew Vachss, _Sacrifice_
From: cortez@milton.u.washington.edu (Tom Warner)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: Bye Bye Dan
Date: 1 Sep 92 20:25:02 GMT
Organization: University of Washington, Seattle

In article <1992Sep1.145410.27113@ugle.unit.no> leifmk@Lise.Unit.NO (Leif Magnar Kj|nn|y) writes:
>
>No, what's going to happen is the following:
>	-During the next month, Bush will call on an international embargo
>	 against Norway to punish us for whaling.  After several weeks of this,
>	 he will announce that the embargo isn't working.
>	-One or two weeks before the election, we get bombed.  Norway has even
>	 less of a chance than Iraq did.  It'll be even easier than invading
>	 the State of Washington; a quick victory to rush some IQ-reducing
>	 adrenalin through a sufficient proportion of the American voters... 
>
All right! Let's get over there and kick some ASS!
Make ourselves proud to be Americans again!

>Leif (not an American either, although he once lived there; also glad)

Oh yeah, what are you, some kind of Commie?!! Why don't you move to Ru ... er
... Chi ... er ... Cuba?

And what makes you think Washington state would be so easy, huh? Who's got
Trident, ask yourself? Cower in fear, all you denizens of less militarized
states!!
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: dianem@boi.hp.com (Diane Mathews)
Subject: Re: Another fine mess (was Re: Phil Gramm)
Organization: Hewlett-Packard, Santa Clara Division
Distribution: usa
Date: Wed, 2 Sep 1992 19:11:22 GMT

>>>BTW, if Gramm is nominated, what sort of VP should he choose?
>>>Someone from the North, for regional balance.  Someone younger

>Oh, man.  Please tell me you're not referring to Ollie North.  That

>What do you think -- should we Virginians make the
>sacrifice and elect Ollie to represent us on Capitol Hill so the rest of
>you can sleep soundly at night?  (Just remember, if we put him in the
>Senate, don't laugh at us -- we did it for you!)

No no!  Don't!  Never let him hold a pubic orifice (OOPS!  that was supposed
to be public office).  Once he gets into the Washington crowd there will be
no stopping him!  Don't you remember, our illustrious veep was once elected
to public office, look where it got him.

Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: dks@MIT.EDU (dks)
Subject: Dannikins MUST continue entertaining America
Date: Sun, 30 Aug 92 11:31:33 EST
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I've seen some speculation here as to what Dannikins can and ought to do
if his Master loses the election this fall.  It seems to me that, before
we try to reach a final decision, we have to establish a few things:

          Dannikins is an empty-headed nitwit
          Dannikins secretly adores the media elite
          Dannikins has a flair for comedy and improvisation
          Dannikins ought to keep doing his magic in public
                    so that we can keep an eye on the bastard and
                    so that a.f.d-q can go on for many happy years

Given all of these, it occurs to me that the perfect career for Our Boy
would be for him to continue entertaining America each evening on a
nationally broadcast game show.  A little more thought, however, reveals
that neither "Wheel of Fortune" nor "Jeopardy" is particularly appropriate. 
After all, it just doesn't seem likely that Dannikins could effectively
replace Pat or Vanna or Alex.

So, friends, we have to DESIGN A NEW PRIME-TIME GAME SHOW FOR DANNIKINS!

As I see it, our design has to satisfy the following criteria:

  1. Dannikins can be the host or he can play a supporting role,
     as he has for the last four years in his Master's freak show.

  2. A role for Marilyn might be nice, so that she can continue to
     support Her Man as she has done ever since she married the twit.

  3. The show must:
        a) have a snappy name;
        b) promote Family Values and raise No New Taxes;
        c) run on Pat Robertson's God-endorsed television network; and
        d) not be scheduled against "Murphy Brown" or "The Simpsons."

  4. Most important of all, the format and content of the show must
     remind voters every night how wise they were to throw the moron
     out of office.

These are my thoughts, and I submit them for your consideration.  I hope that
you will now turn your collective wisdom and expertise to the important and
URGENT task of designing this NEW PRIME-TIME GAME SHOW FOR DANNIKINS!


Dhanesh

Anyone know Merv Griffin's e-mail address?

Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: wolf@leland.Stanford.EDU (Andy Wolfsberg)
Subject: Re: Phil Gramm
Organization: DSG, Stanford University, CA 94305, USA
Date: Wed, 2 Sep 92 17:08:44 GMT

In article <1992Sep2.155502.8959@u.washington.edu> sieferme@milton.u.washington.edu (Eric Sieferman) writes:
>
>BTW, if Gramm is nominated, what sort of VP should he choose?
>Someone from the North, for regional balance.  Someone younger
                  ^^^^^  
>than himself.  Someone with a nationally known name.
`
:O I  love it. a.f.o.n.  This is a true candidate to be as good as a.f.d.q

>-- 
>| Eric Sieferman            |    sieferme@u.washington.edu          |
>| U. of W., M.C.I.S.        |    (206) 685-3104                     |
>

Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
From: jrdobbs@milton.u.washington.edu (J Robert Dobbs  Esq.)
Subject: Re: "I can even forgive Bush for Dan Quayle, but not for this."
Summary: Worse than you think...
Organization: University of Washington, Seattle
Date: Thu, 3 Sep 1992 00:06:57 GMT

In article <1992Sep2.092853.1622@gnv.ifas.ufl.edu> afc@gnv.ifas.ufl.edu writes:
>In article <JASON.92Sep1124501@ab20.larc.nasa.gov>, jason@ab20.larc.nasa.gov (Jason Austin) writes:
>> -> >
>> 	I live on the coast of Virginia.  A few days is not long
>> enough to organize an entire disaster relief system large enough to
>> handle that level of destruction. 
>
>This is exactly why FEMA was created.  It *has* a budget in the $100M/yr
>range to organize an entire disaster relief system large enough to handle
>that level of destruction.  Unfortunately that money seems to be being
>used to support out of work political hacks.


Actually the FEMA has had two new major mandates since the Reagan
administration.  One is to attempt to maintain some semblence of
government after a "limited" nuclear war. (Change of address cards,
tax collection...and no, I'm NOT kidding!!!)

The other purpose is to arrest and detain large numbers of people and
control communications in case of large scale civil disturbances, such
as what might follow a sudden, unpopular invasion (cf. Nicaragua).

Aptly named Defence Secretary "Dick" Cheney wanted them to round up all
the "radicals" before the invasion of Iraq last year.  Bush isn't that
stupid - he knows he can only get away with such a stunt once, and is
saving it for when its really useful/necessary.

With only $100 million to spend (are you sure its not more?) I can't
believe they can maintain the ability all of these different "objectives".
Even if they went back to being just a "super Red Cross", we're talking
about pretty minute budgets by Fed standards.
From: elendil@mintir.new-orleans.la.us (Edward J. Branley)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: Phil Gramm
Date: Wed, 02 Sep 92 07:52:40 CDT
Organization: Minas Tirith BBS, New Orleans, LA

popec@fennec.sccsi.com (William C. Barwell) writes:

> Eris Seiferman, (Aug 31), posts the thought that Danny Boy's main
> opponent in 96 will be Pat "Cultural Warfare" Buchanan. Soory to say this
> is wrong.  It will be Texas' own Senator Phil Gramm.  For those who don't
> know Gramm is one of the handful of Congresscritters that were Reagan
> Robots in 1980.  He was one of the true architecys of Reaganomics, and as
> dangerous a fool as you will find in the Congress.  Watch this guy.  He
> is creepy in a special way that only old time Phil Gramm watchers can
> really appreciate.
>   Old Washington joke.  What's the most dangerous place in Washington D.
> C. ?  The spot between Phil Gramm and a TV camera.
>   He will be running in 96.  He is an expert at gathering huge amounts of
> money.  He is shameless. He may be the Reagan of the late 90's.
> You have been warned.
>
> ----------------
> William C. Barwell [popec@fennec.sccsi.com]  //  Pope Charles
> Pope Of the Church Of The SubGenius for the Golden Triangle Area
> Laughing at everything in the Universe...including the concept of
> laughing at everything in the Universe!
> -----------------

The only problem with Phil Gramm is that a group called alt.fan.phil-gramm is
bound to boring as hell.  He won't be half as much fun as Dano.  Even his
gaffes are boring.




|Edward J. Branley                         elendil@mintir.New-Orleans.LA.US|
|Seashell Software                                UUCP:  rex!mintir!elendil|
|3508 North Woodlawn Avenue                          Compu$erve: 71237,2227|
|Metairie, LA   70006       voice: +1-504-455-5087     bbs: +1-504-455-8665|
Organization: Information Networking Institute, Carnegie Mellon, Pittsburgh, PA
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Date: Wed, 26 Aug 1992 10:40:01 -0400 
From: "Joshua M. Sabloff" <jsa5+@andrew.cmu.edu>
Subject: Re: Some rough comparisons

Excerpts from netnews.alt.fan.dan-quayle: 26-Aug-92 Some rough
comparisons by Ariel Mazzarelli@spam.be 
> Clinton was a Rhodes Scholar,  and studied at either Oxford or Cambridge.
> George Bush,  a U.S. Senator's son,  played first base for Yale.
> Gore was a good student,  was a dove,  and served voluntarily in the armed
> forces as a reporter from the front.  He was also a U.S. Senator's son. 

You probably know this, but I'll add to this post.  Clinton,
unfortuneately, also went to Yale (Law School); he did his undergrad
work at Georgetown.  Gore went to Harvard.


-Josh Sabloff (jsa5@andrew.cmu.edu)
"Now go away before I taunt you a second time-a!"
Xref: sparky alt.fan.dan-quayle:3160 alt.politics.bush:3511 alt.politics.clinton:3518
From: T3B@psuvm.psu.edu (Tom Benson)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle,alt.politics.bush,alt.politics.clinton
Subject: Re: The Republicans are confusing me again...
Date: 30 Aug 92 22:12:35 GMT
 <m9uBqB5w164w@mintir.new-orleans.la.us>
Organization: Penn State University

In article <m9uBqB5w164w@mintir.new-orleans.la.us>,
elendil@mintir.new-orleans.la.us (Edward J. Branley) says:


>You are correct, except that's only school integration.  It wasn't until '64
>and '65 (the Civil Rights and Voting Rights Acts) that the Democrats started
>taking blacks seriously in national politics.  Of course, they had to, since
>blacks in the south suddenly became a political force when obstacles to their
>registering to vote were beginning to disappear.  Of course, by the time
>racial
>tension could make itself felt in the Democratic Party (the '68 convention) we
>also had Vietnam to completely rip the party apart...


Both parties have, like the rest of America, a deplorable history
of racism, but the Democrats did make efforts before the sixties
to heal the problem. For example, Harry Truman's advocacy of
civil rights in the Democratic Party led to a walkout by the
"Dixiecrats" and the commitment by the Democrats to fight their
most conservative Southern racist leaders to establish equal rights.
Sadly, the Republicans took advantage of the Democrats' civil
rights initiatives to create their "Southern strategy," which
brought Southern whites into the Republican Party for the first
time in very large numbers, and won them the presidency, with
one exception, since the presidency of Lyndon Johnson.

The Willie Horton episode was a consistent extension of the
Republican strategy to retain the presidency by appealing to
racial fear.

Tom Benson
Penn State
From: lana@magenta.corp.sgi.com (Lana Mountford)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle
Subject: Re: Taxes
Date: 25 Aug 92 21:44:12 GMT
Organization: Silicon Graphics, Inc.

In article <1992Aug25.190023.13546@u.washington.edu>, sieferme@milton.u.washington.edu (Eric Sieferman) writes:
|> In article <94497@bu.edu> grue@csa.bu.edu (Philip Libin) writes:
|> >
|> >I'm sick and tired of hearing the Democrats whine about how George
|> >Bush lied on his promise of "no new taxes".  The fact is that a great
|> >many people are paying less taxes now than they did four years ago.
|> >Sure the rich got some breaks, but MILLIONS of middle and lower-income
|> >Americans are paying less taxes too!!
|> >
|> >
|> >	(they're unemployed)
|> >
|> >Lets give George Bush credit where credit is due.  He kept his
|> >promise.
|> >
|> 
|> BZZZTT!  Wrong again!  The figures I've seen say that SOME people
|> are paying less in FEDERAL taxes while others are paying more,
|> but the level of taxes (including local and state income taxes and sales
|> taxes) as a percentage of GNP has increased slightly during the Bush era.
|> True, one cannot blame the Bushman for this, but let's not give
|> him credit for a tax reduction that did not occur.
|> 

er ... I believe the point was that since unemployed people pay NO taxes,
and since a *LOT* of people are now unemployed THANKS TO BUSH, Bush didn't 
go back on his word to "lower taxes."  In other words, Philip was posting a
funny.  :-)  (Philip, if I'm mistaken, please let me know so I can argue
with you! :-) :-))


-- 

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
|    /)                      | Lana Mountford    
|   / /  __    ___    __     | Silicon Graphics  
|__(_/__(__)\__/  )__(__)\__ | Mountain View, CA 
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Newsgroups: alt.fan.dan-quayle