HDTenEightyP/NetNews huggingface dataset:
Organization: Arizona State University
Date: Friday, 11 Dec 1992 08:45:55 MST
From: <IDMLH@ASUACAD.BITNET>
Newsgroups: alt.angst
Subject:    For your reading pleasure

I thought I'd make up to all of you for displaying some Christmas
joy.  Here it goes...top ten most annoying things about Christmas:

10)  That pesky salesperson at the department store who keeps
     asking you if they can "be of some assistance."

 9)  That stupid nephew who never appreciates any gift you give
     him.  (So tell him to fuck off and die!)

 8)  That goddam *^$#=(*(*@& ex- who keeps calling to see when
     you're gonna drop off the kids on Christmas Eve.

 7)  That moron in the red Santa Claus suit who keeps
     breathing scotch fumes into my kids faces and tries to
     pinch me in the ass as I walk by.

 6)  Those Salvation Army bell ringers who keep clanging.

 5)  Those dumb Perry Como Christmas specials that give you such
     headache you'd like to smash the TV on the sidewalk below.

 4)  Christmas trees that dry out the day before Christmas Eve.

 3)  Radio stations that play continuous Christmas carols.

 2)  Your youngest you keeps pulling on your shirt saying
     she wants a GameBoy, a TV of her own and your oldest
     who wants a personal phone line and her own car, and
     you need to decide whether to pay the phone bill so
     you can call the suicide hotline, pay the utilities
     so you don't freeze, or buy groceries.

1)  That woman in the mall with the stroller who goes
     5 mph then decides to stop right in front of you.  Or
     the stroller woman who decides you're invisible and that you
     really didn't need that shin that she just ran into
     which is now oozing blood down your leg into your shoe.
     And the reason that you're invisible is that you have no
     purpose in life, and the holidays are just for ill-informed
     pseudo happy people.

OK...I'M DEPRESSED NOW...ENJOY!

From:  Bam-Bam @ ASU
From: llama@pooh.cc.utexas.edu (sine nomine)
Newsgroups: alt.angst
Subject: Re: Camus is my psychotherapist
Date: 12 Dec 92 19:32:31 GMT
X-Newsreader: Tin 1.1 PL5


 dennis@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu (Thomas A. Dennis) writes:

: No... but carnal knowledge with the assistance of (or just plain
: carnal knowledge of) mint-chocolate-chip ice cream may be illegal in
: the state of Georgia... :-(

just another reason everyone should live in austin. you'd be *amazed*
what we can do with mint-chocolate-chip ice cream here...

--
sine | deb
it's not as painful as it sounds, really.


Newsgroups: alt.angst
From: Bruce.Tindall@launchpad.unc.edu (Bruce Tindall)
Subject: Re: the usual Ian Hunter syndrome
Organization: University of North Carolina Extended Bulletin Board Service
Date: Thu, 17 Dec 1992 03:04:25 GMT

In article <1992Dec15.193834.13075@wam.umd.edu> kimy@wam.umd.edu (Yong-Mi Kim) writes:
>yong-mi
>the state of Maryland causes angst!

Schmoke 'em if you got 'em.
--
   The opinions expressed are not necessarily those of the University of
     North Carolina at Chapel Hill, the Campus Office for Information
        Technology, or the Experimental Bulletin Board Service.
           internet:  laUNChpad.unc.edu or 152.2.22.80
Newsgroups: alt.angst
From: singram@eng.auburn.edu (Scott Ingram)
Subject: Don't mind me, I'm just rambling.
Reply-To: singram@eng.auburn.edu
Organization: Auburn University Engineering
Date: Mon, 14 Dec 1992 06:38:49 GMT

First off... this is not Scott Ingram, nor is the following the
work of Scott Ingram. I'm his twisted friend Marshall who doesn't
have his own account. But, if you decide for any reason to respond 
to this, PLEASE call me Orion.

------------------------------------------------------------------

Do you think about what you did?
Do you remember all you said?
Does it matter an iota to you?
Who can say in the dreams of a fool.

I wake up feeling alone, thinking of you
standing there before me, like you did before.
The vision is almost real, but then I wipe
the sleep from my eyes and it fades...
Replaced by my hatred, no longer my desire.

My waking life is a cruel joke.
Its all a crystal construct, delicate beyond measure.
But no one knows how easily it is broken,
for when it shatters, the pattern is only more complex.

I reform my thoughts, oblivious to the facts.
Only my image allows an outline to fall back on.
Nothing matters but that I stay true to myself...
even if that means lying to myself.

Willing suspension of disbelief
haunting soul in which my heart sleeps.
How long the hibernation of love?
How long until it dies of starvation, to weak to come out from the cold?

The neurons fire and the pattern is woven.
What I feel is transitory,
what I think, eternal.
All I do can be siphoned through my filters...
until it comes out pure and sterile, meaningless.

Think about it.

Its all I ever do.

Read about it.

Good enough, its true.

Do it, then deny it.

Keeps the plot the same.

And if you admit to liking it,

just hang your head in shame.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Orion.
From: rhogan@phakt.usc.edu (Ron Hogan)
Newsgroups: alt.angst
Subject: fuck the notion of *real* angst
Date: 19 Dec 1992 00:24:58 -0800
Organization: University of Southern California, Los Angeles, CA
NNTP-Posting-Host: phakt.usc.edu

The idea that there is a real, intellectually based angst, which
develops out of literary and philosophical movements, and which is
somehow more authentic and pure an angst than one based on emotional
dissatisfaction with the conditions of an individual's life...

...strikes me as elitist bullshit.

Qualtitative comparison of angst?
Give me a fucking break.

Not to invalidate Camus, Sartre, Dostoevsky, Beckett et al., but
they aren't inherently purer in their angst than anybody on alt.angst
who shares their frustration that (they're virgins/they hate their job/
life sucks/fill in your angst) with us.

Ron

Newsgroups: alt.angst,alt.religion.kibology
From: mdw@db.TC.Cornell.EDU (Matt Welsh)
Subject: Re: Trip on Space Ship 3.
Organization: The Linux Inquisition, Propaganda Division
Date: Sat, 12 Dec 1992 00:12:39 GMT

In article <RSHOLMES.92Dec10150308@rodan.syr.EDU> rsholmes@rodan.syr.EDU (Rich Holmes) writes:
>In article <1992Dec9.045323.5679@beaver.cs.washington.edu> boesch@cs.washington.edu (Eric Boesch) writes:
>> Anyway, I decree that FAQs are IN this year.
>
>Does anyone have the FAQ for Rich Holmes?

That IS the FAQ for Rich Holmes. 

mdw
-- 
Matt Welsh     mdw@tc.cornell.edu     Cornell Theory Center
  "Go on, emote! I was raised on thought balloons!"
From: hwajin@iphasew.com (Hwa-Jin Bae)
Newsgroups: alt.angst
Subject: Re: Books, please
Date: 17 Dec 92 20:35:08 GMT
Organization: Interphase West, Santa Clara, CA

the following list is just from memory, so i there may be typos, etc.:

paul auster:
	the art of hunger
	invention of solitude
	new york trilogy
	moon palace
	and many others

charles bukowski:
	the most beautiful woman in town (short story collection)
	love is a dog from hell (poetry collection)
	fuck machine
	many others

madison smartt bell:
	the year of silence
	straight cut

sharon olds:
	the living and the dead
	various poetry books


more later...  if you want
Newsgroups: alt.angst
From: machala@spdc.ti.com (King Mosher)
Subject: Re: Books, please
Organization: Texas Instruments
Date: Fri, 18 Dec 1992 17:31:46 GMT

"Catcher in the Rye" J.D. Salinger


--
              Beer - It's not just for breakfast anymore.

Chuck Machala - Semiconductor Process and Design Center - Texas Instruments
Newsgroups: alt.angst
From: duke@portal.paperboy.osf.org (Duke Robillard)
Subject: Re: Re : Camus is my psychotherapist 
Organization: /u1/duke/.organization
Date: 17 Dec 92 18:26:17


In article <1992Dec16.192451.1769@bnr.ca> tigger@nbrwh72.bnr.ca (Jeff Skinner) writes:

   if I had to characterize the dominant emotional riff
   people are vamping on here I would call it (even more than than
   sheer self-indulgence, which is a close second, Duke) self-pity.
   But then, isn't angst a kind of designer self-pity for those 
   who need to believe that their suffering has some kind of higher
   purpose ?  

It's not, but most people pretend it is.  Angst is honest, and 
not tied up with your own personal suffering.  

But the masses don't see that.  I blame the educational system

   Depending on my state of mind I may find her stuff really a breath of
   air and she seems courageous and daring in her bold self revelation.
   At other times she sounds like a kind of pathetic aging exibitionist
   wowing the kids on the net with her self-congratulatory blather.

Yes, those are the two ways to read a sine-post.  Shall we
take a vote?

        self-absorbed whining:     1
        art:                       0

--
Duke Robillard, DoD #0130, duke@osf.org
Newsgroups: alt.angst
From: matt@crawfish.math.tulane.edu (Matt Hopkins)
Subject: Re: Depression
Organization: Computer Science Dept., Tulane Univ., New Orleans, LA
Date: Tue, 15 Dec 1992 00:38:23 GMT
Nntp-Posting-Host-[nntpd-17821]: crawfish.math.tulane.edu

In article <85342@ut-emx.uucp> llama@pooh.cc.utexas.edu (sine nomine) writes:
> love's a nice thing, addictive in its own way. and having a regular
> sex partner and someone to cuddle up with is nice, too. but does the
> lack of these things automatically mean you have no life at all? say
> i'm doing interesting, fun, creative things and hanging out with
> friends and just sort of existing in a way that makes me really happy,
> not actively seeking romance but not closing it out. is all that
> pointless unless i'm getting fucked x number of times per week?

I think this is a very important point.  "all that" _seems_ pointless when all  
your friends are married/going out with someone for x months, and go home with  
someone every night.  When your best friends all have boy/girl-friends or a  
husband/wife it feels damn lonely when you go home, alone, to a roomate eating  
dinner with his girlfriend in your kitchen.  Left amongst other lonelies it  
wouldn't seem so bad.  (A lot of my personal interest in reading alt.angst  
stems from this.)  Is it jealousy?  No, I don't think it's jealousy of a  
particular person, but of a ... "life".  There's something missing in our  
lives that everyone else seems to have, and we feel cheated.  

For the more insecure, you get the "What is it that she finds interesting in  
HIM?" questions.  Not to imply that you want her, in particular, interested in  
you, but you want to understand what she finds so enticing.  What does he  
have/do to deserve all that happiness and not you?  (no relationship-from-hell  
stories, please) I used to ask these questions all the time (being insecure).   
Nowadays (somewhat less insecure.  No, really!) I don't care as much, and just  
try to have a good time without looking so hard.  But hanging out with all  
those couples so much does take its toll...

Matt

--
        matt@crawfish.math.tulane.edu (NeXT Mail accepted!)
 Matt Hopkins - Tulane University - Dept of Mathematics - New Orleans
 "Do you hate people?" "No ... but I seem to feel better when they're
      not around." - Barfly  "Hey mister! Throw me some beads!"
Newsgroups: alt.angst
From: duke@portal.paperboy.osf.org (Duke Robillard)
Subject: Re: Books, please
Organization: /u1/duke/.organization
Date: 17 Dec 92 18:16:50


moscoso@ux1.cso.uiuc.edu (Innocuous Punch) writes:

   >Anyone willing to share with me some names of their favorite angstful books?  

	   _The_Bell_Jar_
		   by: Sylvia Plath

   I'm not even sure I could classify this novel by the word 'angst'.  I'm sure
   it surpasses that.  

The Bell Jar is a very good book, but it has nothing to do with 
angst.  Plath suffered from simple clinical depression--just a
chemical imbalance in the brain.  This isn't angst.  Angst has
an intellectual basis, it's not just an illness .  Hesse, 
Dostoevsky, people like that write about angst.

This is a common mistake on this group.


--
Duke Robillard, DoD #0130, duke@osf.org
Newsgroups: alt.angst,alt.suicide.holiday
From: ivy@camelot.bradley.edu (Ivelisse Atiles)
Subject: Re: Depression
Organization: Bradley University
Date: 14 Dec 92 01:18:18 GMT

<Mindlessly optimistic mode on>
In <lynn.921213154811@fusion.physics.auburn.edu> lynn@physics.auburn.edu (Owen P Lynn) writes:

>         1. I'm a lifeless geek.
>            a. I'm 20 and still a virgin
>            b. I've had only one date

My brother can top you. He's 22 and he's not had one date
(that I know of). 
'Sides, being a virgin isn't a crime (from a Judeo-Christian point of
view, anyway).

>            d. For all intents and purposes, I am INVISIBLE
>               to members of the opposite sex.

I doubt it.

>         3. Humans are incredibly selfish, greedy, stupid animals
>            with no long term memory, and no ability to think
>            about the future. Who cares what happens? We're all
>            going to be dead very soon, with respect to the universe,
>            and even geological history. We're just a flash in the
>            pan.

Tell us something we don't know?
I was reading something yesterday. Something called "Caligula"
by Albert Camus.  Somebody's wife or girlfriend died and he
was talking to his friend. He was saying"from her death I learned
that man is mortal and that man is not happy in this world."
As if he'd discovered some essential truth.
So his friend, in essence, tells him, "so? Nobody seems to be
as hung up on this fact as you are."  Hey, man, look around.
So we're nothing and we live a really short time compared to the
vastness of the universe which will forever stand.
The real wisdom here, my friend, is that LIFE IS REALLY SHORT.
Yes, we're all going to die. That's why life is so precious.
That's why we have to make our brief stay here count, if not for
anyone else, for ourselves.
The choice is yours.
<Mindlessly cheerful mode off>

What a silly thing to say on a.s.h, huh?
--
Ivelisse Atiles       @}--}--}--     Forever searching, never right. I am lost
ivy@camelot.bradley.edu          in oceans of night. Forever hoping I can find
Bradley University             memories... those memories I left behind. -Enya 
Newsgroups: alt.angst
From: ericm@microunity.com (Eric Murray)
Subject: Re: And a Happy New Year!
Organization: MicroUnity Systems Engineering, Inc., Sunnyvale, CA
Date: Mon, 14 Dec 1992 06:18:57 GMT

In article <winkern.21.0@columbia.dsu.edu> winkern@columbia.dsu.edu (NANCY MARIE WINKER) writes:

A posting in which 86% of the lines are included text.  Buried within lay:

>I've been here.  It's so scary how I can relate to this stuff!  We are truly 
>a sick bunch here.  

Oh, we are dearie, we are!  We're so sick that we're incapable of
using our editors!

Seriously, hon, if you don't edit the included text in your replies then
no one will read your postings.


--
            Eric Murray                 ericm@microunity.com
In this game, the winner is also the loser, and the judge's decisions are final
From: sokay@cyclone.mitre.org (Stephen J. Okay)
Newsgroups: alt.angst
Subject: 'Nother typical angstful bastard
Date: 17 Dec 92 22:39:25 GMT
Organization: Mitre Corporation, McLean, VA
Originator: sokay@cyclone


The best angst seems to be the most repetitive on here..

I'm speaking of the kind where you get a mail message from somebody
you haven't heard from in a while, esp. somebody you kind of like,
and they go on and on about how wonderful their life is because
now they and $PIB_NAME are going at it like weasels, and oh, by the way
how are things going for you!?!?!??

---Just the thing I need to totally trash the rest of a day that had seen
yet another episode of The Paranoid OfficeMate From Hell now throwing my
phone around the office and crying that I'm "deliberately harassing her"
, code thats not being deterministic, plus the existential angst of
having to deal with turning 27....I hate birthdays. I hate the attention,
I hate the stupid ass questions("Do you feel any different?"--Of course
not!...24 hours passes and I'm supposed to feel magically different?),
I hate all the guilt I feel of people paying specific attention to me.

----Steve(Think I'm gonna go home and go to sleep...alone of course)
-- 
---------
sokay@cyclone.mitre.org
		"Your Mind....My Playground" ---me 
Newsgroups: alt.angst
From: moscoso@ux1.cso.uiuc.edu (Innocuous Punch)
Subject: Re: Books, please
Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana
Date: Thu, 17 Dec 1992 18:43:31 GMT

hagop@edison.seas.ucla.edu (Hagop D. Janoyan) writes:

>Anyone willing to share with me some names of their favorite angstful books?  

>Anything will do...fiction, non-fiction...just something that I'll be glad
>I read, and something that will somehow affect my thought process (for better
>or for worse).

Dare I mention it?  Ok, I dare.

	_The_Bell_Jar_
		by: Sylvia Plath

I'm not even sure I could classify this novel by the word 'angst'.  I'm sure
it surpasses that.  Currently, I'm in my second reading of this book, years
after I first grabbed hold of it.  *sigh*...  partly autobiographical account
of a great poet.  Great poet.  Poet.
--
-ivan
Newsgroups: alt.angst
From: dkeller@nyx.cs.du.edu (Dave Keller)
Subject: Re: Camus is my psychotherapist
Organization: University of Denver, Dept. of Math & Comp. Sci.
Date: Wed, 16 Dec 92 17:55:27 GMT

duke@portal.paperboy.osf.org (Duke Robillard) writes:


>In article <85091@ut-emx.uucp> llama@pooh.cc.utexas.edu (sine nomine) writes:

>   i just wanna talk about being self-indulgent. the stuff i write on
>   this group is total self-indulgence, and i've never pretended
>   otherwise. 

>That's why it's so dull, sine.
[et-f___ing-cetera]

Sine is so good I've had out-of-body experiences while reading her
posts.  I don't always agree but damn, she is good.  Face it buddy,
you are a gnat biting the butt of an elephant, a meaningless little
nothing posessing not the slightest clue.  Go back to lurking (which
BTW is where I'm taking myself now).

--
   -=: Dave Keller :=-     | Trust machines to make big decisions,
  dkeller@nyx.cs.du.edu    | Programmed by fellows with compassion and vision.
  `Spirit of the Night'    |     -- Donald Fagen, "I.G.Y"
Newsgroups: alt.angst
From: mlc9g@Virginia.EDU ("Matt Condon")
Subject: Re: A holiday poem
Organization: University of Virginia
Date: Sun, 20 Dec 1992 08:04:19 GMT

<SMS137@psuvm.psu.edu> writes:
> <*INTERESTING* poetry deleted>
> 
> This portion of a poem(?) was recited to me in a dream by ALF, tv's wise-cracki
> alien.  HE CAME TO ME IN A DREAM wearing a Santa cap and sporting a clean-shave
> genitalia area.  Can you help me?

I don't know... Sounds like you're beyond help.  :-)
From: mlc9g@Virginia.EDU ("Matt Condon")
Subject: Why bother?
Organization: University of Virginia
Date: Sun, 20 Dec 1992 08:34:16 GMT

I just started to post something...  I had it all typed out...
Then I said "why bother?" and deleted it.  So, therefore, I
pose this question to you : Why bother?
Organization: Arizona State University
Date: Wednesday, 16 Dec 1992 10:09:44 MST
From: <IDJMW@ASUACAD.BITNET>
Newsgroups: alt.angst
Subject:    sigh........

Men are like coyotes,
they show up to be touched and loved,
like some exotic house pet.
But by daybreak,
they're talking about how you
have to keep things symbiotic,
have no expectations,
and then disappear out the door
with a handful of cookies

and your car keys.



j.
(moping poet)
From: lemay@netcom.com (Laura Lemay)
Newsgroups: alt.angst
Subject: Re: And a Happy New Year!
Date: 15 Dec 92 19:28:55 GMT
Organization: Netcom - Online Communication Services  (408 241-9760 guest)

In article <winkern.22.0@columbia.dsu.edu> winkern@columbia.dsu.edu (NANCY MARIE WINKER) writes:
> 
> I'm not really sorry.  I just don't like having to defend myself for 
> something so petty.


This is usenet, babe.  Get used to it.




-- 
*********************************************************
Laura Lemay                              lemay@netcom.com
writer of trifles in shadows and blood
*********************************************************
Newsgroups: alt.angst
From: bonk@leland.Stanford.EDU (James Lance Withee)
Subject: I feel weird
Organization: DSG, Stanford University, CA 94305, USA
Distribution: usa
Date: Thu, 17 Dec 92 20:18:29 GMT

This is not J. Withee, FYI--it is his SO getting some relief from her monotonousexistence by realizing there are others out there as lonely as I.  I have been
a bit reluctant to post, but after 3 months of reading and reading, I figured
what the hell?  If it doesn't go over well, screw it.  I am a grad student
widow, unemployed, and friendless in this new university environment that I
have been placed in.  I left my job and wonderful friends to accompany my be-   loved to Stanford, where he has started a graduate career, and I have learned
to be afraid to go outside of our apartment.  I used to be a social animal, but 
my life has not really been promoting that sort of behavior during the past
3 months since we arrived here.  I spend my days, rummaging through the news-
paper, just wishing that there would be a perfect job for me, and then I have
been watching lots of soaps and talk shows, in addition to reading the net.
I sometimes feel as though everyone around here knows that I'm in our apartment 
without a job, and this has made me reluctant to go outside.  I just plain feel
weird and alone, and although it is the "Holiday Season," I couldn't care less.

One thing in particular that has been frustrating for me is everyone's solutionsto my predicament.  "Go out to a cafe and talk to people!"  "Walk around down-
town and talk to people!"  I don't know about the rest of the people in the 
world, but I just can't do that.  Is it normal to be able to just cruise around
and introduce yourself to people that you don't know and start up friendships
with them?  I am truly puzzled by this.  I am a person that does need solitary
time in her life to reflect, etc., but this is starting to really get to me.  I
have been placing so many long distance calls to my friends just to hear a 
friendly voice, that my bills have been through the roof.  My SO is a wonderful
person, and has been as attentive as possible, but, I can't expect him to spend
all his free time dealing with his depressed girlfriend just because she is too
freaked out to make a life in this new city.  He is trying his hardest to make
things easier for me, but it's wearing on him.  Basically, I am getting really
bitter, and I think everyone I see through my window is some pseudo-intellectualfreak, and I just am afraid of starting over here.  

As a mid-twenties college graduate, I realize that there is a glut of
other people like me in the same unemployed state.  I am so sick of receiving
those letters that tell me that they'll keep my resume on file for two years,
and that they'll call me if something comes up.  If I get another one, I'm 
going to vomit blood.  I hate being a "twenty-something" or whatever the
hell I'm supposed to be, and I hate where I live and I hate not having
friends, and I hate, hate, hate, hate.

Angst-ridden on the Peninsula
Newsgroups: alt.angst
From: duke@portal.paperboy.osf.org (Duke Robillard)
Subject: Re: Camus is my psychotherapist
Organization: /u1/duke/.organization
Date: 15 Dec 92 18:54:37


In article <85091@ut-emx.uucp> llama@pooh.cc.utexas.edu (sine nomine) writes:

   i just wanna talk about being self-indulgent. the stuff i write on
   this group is total self-indulgence, and i've never pretended
   otherwise. 

That's why it's so dull, sine.

   but it's well-written self-indulgence, done with style and
   sometimes grace. 

wow, not only self-indulgent, but self-congratulatory.

   and when i get mail that says "wow, you really nailed
   it, that's how i feel sometimes," i'm inclined to believe 

That they are even worse losers than myself?

   it's even vaguely useful. 

Wow, and self-important, too.

--
Angry Duke Robillard, DoD #0130, duke@osf.org
Newsgroups: alt.angst