From: stanford@leland.Stanford.EDU (Scott Stanford)
Subject: Re: LSJUMB's show at the Blockbuster Bowl
Keywords: edit, censor, cut! cut! cut!
Organization: none whatsoever
Distribution: usa
Date: Mon, 4 Jan 93 21:14:33 GMT

By request, here were the original shows for the Blockbuster Bowl.  I
don't have the announcer's stuff on hand, so anything that I attribute
to them is in fact a lot funnier.

> What show is the SMUT planning for New Year's Day?  I don't get ESPN, so I
> won't see it.

The original concepts went something like this:

PREGAME:  A NIGHT RENTING MOVIES

The Band runs out and forms a giant videocassete tape (not as giant as
we'd like - the AD only let 70 members go).  The announcers say
something to the effect of "hmm, what movie should we rent - howz
about Jesus Christ Superstar?"  The Band plays the opening barz of JCS
which then winds down.  Announcers: "Oh, that's right, Blockbuster
doesn't carry it.  How about Star Wars?"  The Band plays the opening
bars to SW, and the tape (made of mylar) breaks causing the music to
wind down again.  So the announcers decide to get out the copy of the
1993 Blockbuster Bowl, which has been sitting underneath the Sports
Illustrated Shoe Phone.  They plug it in, and start making popcorn.
The Band makes a pan on the field, and Band members in the middle
throw their hats in the air to simulate popcorn popping.  Then comes
the FBI warning.  Band spells "FBI" on field and starts playing Been
Caught Stealing.  The announcers decide to fast forward past the
warning, so music speeds up to ludicrous pace (people just squealing on
horns) but slow down for the last 4 bars.  Finally we get to watch the
bowl.  The Band makes a big TV set (w/ mylar antennae) and plays Let
it Roll while the altoz and clar-pix play football in the middle.  At
one point in the song the music cuts out as the announcers
"accidentally sit on the mute button" and later they rewind to watch a
great play in slow mo (accompanied by playing the song half tempo).

However, due to events beyond our control, the script had to be
entirely changed around (Blockbuster Nazis - we left our Blockbuster
rental cards on the field for them) and it became some weird tribute
to Joe Robbie stadium.  Go figure.  Anyway:

HALFTIME:  Other Stupid Bowl Games

The Perot Bowl:  Everyone leaves during the 3rd quarter, but come back
in the 4th, even though it's too late to win.  Band forms $ and plays
Hard to Handle.

The Publisher's Clearing House Bowl:  You may have already won this
bowl game!  Band forms a letter which opens, showing the giant prop
check.

The Energizer Bowl:  It just keeps going and going (yeah, I know, old
joke).  Band makes a giant circuit on the field, with prop e- running
around it.  We play Blinded by Science.

Ex-defense contractors Bowl:  To employ the people that brought you
ICBMs and mustard gas.  Band forms a missile which blows up.

Emergency Broadcast Bowl:  Originally we made a big hurricane for this
one while playing the emergency broadcast tones (two notes a step
apart).  However, it didn't make it on the field as the Blockbuster
Nazis kicked our announcers out of the booth by this point.  Oh well.

That's more or less the shows - the Blockbuster people were horribly
organized (the Penn State Band came by - cool folks, good sounding
group, too - and apparently had a lot of problems with the Blockbuster
morons as well) but we had a pretty good time anyway.

Hasta la pasta-
-- 
Scott Stanford                                ___./~~~\.___
stanford@leland.stanford.edu         ____---~~ =========== ~~---____
                                    / ._________ '  o  ` _________. \
A planet is a terrible thing       /./           `_____'           \.\
to lay waste to.                   |=|                             |=|
                                    ~                               ~
-- 
Scott Stanford                 |)  Eenie meenie miney moe.
stanford@leland.stanford.edu  /|   Catch a tiger by the toe.
                             ((|,) If he hollers...yeah whatEVER.
"MORE Doctah Peppah!!"        ~|~  He's EATIN' your ass.  Run, you idiot.