From: friedman@news.cis.ohio-state.edu (Mark  Friedman, Crimson)
Subject: 21st Century Schizoid Man [part 06/21]
Organization: The Ohio State University Department of Computer and Information Science
Date: Thu, 20 Aug 1992 05:47:16 GMT

I think a little, errr, explaination is needed for this one.

Or maybe an apology!  :-)

The following episode contains a gratuitous (literally) sex scene,
thrown in only because it was mentioned that the story already had
gratuitous violence but was still lacking "steamier" aspects.

Unfortunately, I was in a writing groove at the time, so I took it as
a challenge and threw it in for an experiment...and for laughs!  It's
pretty cliche': I think this sort of stuff could be made by letting a
NLP AI loose in /usr/spool/news/rec/arts/erotica!  :-)

But what's done is done.  I'm not gonna wipe out the excerpt in a fit
of hindsight.  What's important is that it's got good entertainment
value if taken for what it was.  Still, some people don't like the
racy stuff, so this is fair warning...

However, it's suggested that you bare (pun!) with it, since it
contains *major* continuity points.  This is an important turning
point in the way Freddy looks at his current way of life.  It's a
"Can't Miss" post!  :-)

Repeat to yourself, "It's just fiction: I should really just relax!"

						Have fun,
						- Mark

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

	Larry had dropped him off at about midnight from the moving
van in a nearby tunnel in order to avoid being seen together.  They'd
meet back at Penumbra in a week or so, but in the meantime it wouldn't
be smart for a Trog Crusher to be seen in the company of an ork...

	Dirk's apartment wasn't half bad, Freddy thought.  "Sheesh, I
didn't know gangers made out so well..."  He looked over the stereo
system.  "Pretty kick-ass."  However, the CD collection had a lot to
be desired.  "Howitzers n' Chrysanthemums?  Gimmie a break..."  The
trid unit was also top of the line.  "What does this guy get paid?"
He was almost sure the equipment wasn't stolen, since most of the
manuals were in their respective cabinets.

	He checked out the fridge.  "Yum.  Beef jerky!"  He took out a
stick and started gnawing on it.  "Lessee..."  He proceeded to look
through all the cabinets and drawers in the apartment.  He was trying
to piece together Dirk's mannerisms so he wouldn't give himself away.
He had compiled a lot of data during the interrogation at the Rhino,
but he needed more...

	He walked into the bedroom and looked around.  "Oooh, black
velvet paintings.  Tasteful."  He started to rummage though the
closets.  What he found in one surprised him: a whole closet full of
dresses!  He laughed, "Dirk is a cross dresser?  Heh!"

	A female voice yelled out behind him, "Dirk!"  He spun around
to find a woman in a towel...errr, with nothing on running up to him.
She grabbed him and cried, "I thought they killed you..."

	Freddy's jaw dropped in astonishment, and he soon found the
woman's tongue probing in his mouth.  He decided to go with the flow
and returned the favour, going where second nature led him.  He
forcefully kissed her back, finding himself entirely enveloped in the
situation (and musing that maybe love was indeed a matter of that
thing they call "chemistry").

	His hands drifted around until they came to her breasts, which
were quite full, but not too large to handle (perfectly sized, in his
book).  He squeezed them gently with his palms, feeling their warmth
and slight moisture ("Must've been in the shower...").  He rubbed his
thumbs lightly around her already erect nipples and she started to
moan quietly.

	Freddy stopped kissing her and moved to sucking on her left
breast while still fondling the right.  He softly bit the nipple,
eliciting a shap inhale of surprise from the woman.  She then giggled
and leaned over him, covering him with her waist-length purple hair.
She started to take off his jacket and shirt while Freddy applied
further tantric arts.  He held the nipple between his teeth and
flicked the tip of it with his tongue.  The woman started breathing
heavily and began dragging her long sharp fingernails up and down his
back...

	Suddenly he stopped and looked up at her.  He smiled widely.
She gasped back, "Don't stop!"  He laughed, picked her up, and dropped
her onto the bed.  He walked over to the edge of the water bed and
slid her towards him and gently positioned her to lie down on her back
with her legs dangling down off the side.  Freddy then applied the
earlier method on her right breast, and the woman started to breathe
heavily again.

	Now he slid his hand down her torso until it came to her
pussy.  It was already quite wet, but Freddy doubted this particular
form of moisture came from her shower.  He ran the tips of his fingers
up and down her inner thighs, producing a gasp from the woman.  After
this her started rubbing vertically along her lips and then stuck his
index finger of his left hand into her cunt.  The woman softly moaned,
"yesss...", and he started pulling the finger in and out, accompanied
by a circular motion.  Soon he put his middle finger in as well, and
then his ring finger.

	The woman was panting slowly now, her orgasm starting to
build.  She rocked back on the bed, forcing his fingers deeper into
her.  When he thought she was ready, Freddy released her breast and
moved down to kneel on the floor between her dangling legs, while all
the while keeping his fingers growing.  He was now in position to
attack her clit, which was visibly engorged.  His kissed it lightly
with his lips and then softly began to lick around it (all the while
thinking of anchovies!).  As he increased the speed of this, the woman
started to come: she grabbed the sheets of the bed with her
outstretched arms and gripped the tightly.  To add to this, Freddy
forced his fingers deeper into her and began fully sucking on her
clit.

	This was too much for her: Freddy felt her muscles clench,
almost pulling his hand inside her.  She lifted her legs up and
wrapped them tightly around his head, practically suffocating him.
Soon she screamed out, "Yeeesssss!!!", and released her hot jizz all
over his hand.  When she finally released his neck again he stopped
his oral task and slowed his fingers to a stop.  He stood up and she
rolled over in the bed, pulling the covers over her.  "Mmmmmmm", she
moaned, "that was wonnnderfulll...".  She purred like a feline.

	Freddy looked into a mirror at Dirk's face, which didn't look
in the least bit guilty, and then back at her.  "Yeah, I guess it made
a pretty good homecoming party."  He smiled lecherously.

	She grinned back, "Yeah, but how about we try to make it
*better*?"  She threw the covers off of herself again and invited him
over with a curling index finger.

	He laughed and took off his pants.  It was only then that
Freddy noticed that Dirk's gangly frame contained some beneficial
features which he hadn't considered before...

	*	*	*	*	*	*	*	*

	Freddy took an incredibly long shower the next morning while
the apartment filled with the smell of breakfast.  His brain ached
from the entire last week of too much action, not to mention the past
night's activities.

	He got out of the shower and wiped the steam off the mirror.
Dirk looked back at him.  He muttered, "What the hell are we gonna do,
bud?  Just come out and say, 'Sorry hon, but I'm a bodysnatcher and
killed your boyfriend. One hundred percent electric brain-death.'"  He
sighed and finished getting dressed in some of Dirk's less-spikey
clothes.

	He walked out of the bedroom and into the living room and
received another surprise.  "Daddy!", a child squealed, and ran up to
him and hugged his leg.

	|	|	|	|	|	|	|	|

	He awoke on a couch with a nasty pain at the side of his head.
The woman was sitting beside him, and the little boy was watching
anime on the trideo.  She wiped his forehead with a damp cloth.  "Are
you okay?  You just keeled over and passed out!"  She ran her fingers
through his hair.  "You had me so worried."

	Freddy shook his head to chase the clouds away, "I guess I
really haven't been the same since we ran into those orks..."  He'd
formulated the idea earlier to compensate for situations when he
couldn't imitate Dirk's knowledge.  "They hurt me so bad...I could
hardly even remember where I lived..."

	She hugged him.  "But it's over now.  Just try to take it easy
and everything will be all right."  She stood up again.  "I'm going to
finish breakfast.  It'll be ready in five minutes."  She kissed him on
the forehead and walked off to the kitchen.

	He walked over to the child and sat down beside him.  "Whatcha
doing?"

	"Watching Mallet-Man..."  He stood up and jumped onto Freddy's
shoulders.

	Freddy watched a cartoon man with large hammers for hands
chase around a giggling weasel.  "Do you like it?"

	The boy started drumming on his head.  "Kinda.  I like
MicroMen best.  They're on next..."

	"Oh."  Freddy decided to play a little game. "Say, how old are
you?"

	"Six..."  The kid's eyes were glued to the screen.

	"What's your full name?"

	"Jeff'ry Norman Lee..."

	"And what's your mother's name?"

	"Lisa Meyer Lee..."

	"That's very good!  You're pretty smart for a little guy."

	"Unh-huh..."

	'Lisa' called out from the kitchen, "Breakfast!"

	Freddy picked Jeff of his back and put him back on the floor
in front of the trid.  He stood up and sighed, thinking to himself,
"Yep, you just took a decent man's life, Marx.  Way to go, you fucking
loser..."  He plodded over to the kitchen and sat down.  "Mmmmm,
smells good."  It actually did, to boot.

	Lisa put a plate in front of him.  "Eat up.  You'll probably
have to do a *lot* of explaining at work today: you might even miss
lunch."  He picked up a fork and started stabbing at the poached eggs
and bacon.  He really didn't have and appetitie after his awful
realization.

	He noticed Lisa was humming a little major pentatonic melody.
Her voice was sweet and inherently musical.  "That's beautiful," he
commented and muched on a piece of bacon.

	She turned around and raised her eyebrows in surprise.  "You
never said *that* before!  Then again, you never did *anything* like
last night, ever..."  She smiled at him.

	Freddy chuckled.  Dirk must've been a "power-fucker".  "Yeah,
I guess I'm looking at things differently now.  Like they say, today
is the first day of the rest of your life..."  Of course he didn't
mention that this meant every day *before* today was a wasted,
meaningless, and generally pathetic practice.

	He heard some scratching at the door.  Lisa gasped, "That must
be Chuck!"  She walked over to the door and opened it, and a Siberian
husky trotted in.  "Where were you, young man?  Jeff and I looked all
over for you last night..."

	The dog ignored her and plodded up to Freddy, but then
suddenly backed away.  It whimpered a bit, and then ran off to find
Jeff.  "Wow, whaddya think of that?"  Lisa asked.

	Freddy hoped it wasn't what he thought it was.  "Errr, maybe
he still smells orks on me?  I dunno..."

	But he did.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Comprehensive scripting and color commentary here is Copyright by Mark
Friedman 1991, all rights reserved.  Basic story plot  and Matrix help
was by Jerry Weiler, but he won't mind: I'm giving him all the profits
from the venture. Let's  see,  what's 100% of  $0.00?  :-) Also, basic
Shadowrun backdrops are in extensive use, so them FASA dudes might get
a small cut as well...

Any questions, comments, requests, criticisms, and Chapman Sticks will
be accepted and appreciated at the address in the sig.

					- Mark "Crimson" Friedman

Mark "Klone Crimson" Friedman is friedman@cis.ohio-state.edu .................
"There is nothing former   "Beat poets,    "If you put a hungry ferret in your
 about King Crimson."       not children."  trousers, he'll run around..."
 - Robert Fripp, 5/11/90    - anonymous     - Nigel Tufnel (Spinal Tap)
Newsgroups: alt.cyberpunk.chatsubo