duct tape forever is a 2002 comedy film based on the red green show .

it was written by steve smith , the actor who plays red green .

duct tape forever

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a lampshaded subversion appeared in one episode where tape was needed to do duct work . . . scouring through the rolls of duct tape uncovered what he was looking for - adhesive tape .
. . . using the handyman ' s secret weapon : duct tape .
the saddest thing about duct tape forever is the fact that it ' s a sign of the direction commercial canadian cinema is going : cheap comedies with name - brand appeal .
red : ( blows the dust off an old video tape )
thetamax video tape : made in portuguese macau
.
second place is for winners : in duct tape forever , in order to pay off a $ 10 , 000 fine , harold suggests the lodge enter a duct tape sculpture contest to win the money . the lodge members are skeptical , but when harold tells them the $ 10 , 000 is the third - place prize , they figure it ' s within their abilities .
: you know it . played with in the episode
no duct tape ,
where the lodge runs out of duct tape—only to find loads of it in the attic , where it was being used to fix the ductwork . this leads to a comment from mike , who says ,
homemade inventions : the handyman corner segments . it ' s amazing what you can do with some rusted k - cars and a few hundred rolls of duct tape .
product placement : 3m became a sponsor of the show , and red a spokesman , after they saw how much scotch duct tape ( a 3m brand ) the show used .
the shooting of red ' s first feature film has begun , and pbs supporters from across the country travelled to the set to be a part of this unique and memorable experience . thanks to all of the pbs supporters from the cast and crew of duct tape forever ! here are some of the winners that made the trip :
‘duct tapes are forever’ is all new downloadable content which transports the escapists to the secret world of spies , villains and tuxedos . take control of a tuxedo - clad superspy as you find yourself trapped in an evil villain’s lair , guarded by henchmen .
the red green show was duct taped live before a studio audience .
plenty more of that ilk .
duct tapes are forever is one of the dlcs from the game the escapists . it is james - bond themed ( unofficially ) and it asks you to plot your escape from a supervillain ' s underground lair . it was released on november 3 , 2015 and costs £1 / $ 3 . 99 / €3 . 99
censored for comedy : in one opening segment , red has
_ _ ck off
written in duct tape on the back of his car , with everything before the ck blocked by a jacket . he lifts up the jacket to reveal that the missing letters are ba , and says something about how things aren ' t always as they seem .
meanwhile they also carry on with the show within a show that red and harold are producing , a local cable - access version of the standard saturday - afternoon outdoor program . various topics are touched on , but the actual quality of the information tends to be . . . well , the most elaborate segment is
handyman ' s corner
, wherein red somehow turns a simple diy repair or project into a huge , awkward , goldbergian task with the help of the
handyman ' s secret weapon
, duct tape . and lots of it .
murray woolworth is owner of the only convenience store in the area , so he gouges people on everything , and often offers cheap substitute products , such as selling a four - man raft , sight - unseen , and then delivering a large inner - tube with a tackle box duct taped to it .
chainsaw good : subverted in that red never used chainsaws as weapons , but in handyman projects . one notable example involved his duct taping a chainsaw to a bicycle to create a moped . also subverted by bill , who occasionally tried to use chainsaws for what they were designed for , but his lethal klutz tendencies led to epic fails anyway .
duct - taped to a wheelchair and tortured , tom manages to escape when his snowmobile buddies fortuitously show up with some shotguns . the ensuing melee leaves the sisters presumed dead , but for tom the nightmare is not over . obsessed with vanessa , he tracks down the illegitimate daughter ( maria cina ) she gave up 30 years earlier and finds her living in hollywood , a bartender and would - be actress , under the name clara hansen . tom hires her to pose for a character in his new animated feature , an allegorical account of his ordeal at the hands of her mother and aunt .
the janitor job you start off with can help towards getting some starter money , but some of the puddles needed to complete your quota can spawn around the rocket , which is a restricted area - you ' ll be attacked immediately if you get seen there , even if you ' re just trying to do your job . this makes the janitor job an absolute pain at times , so try to get a better job as soon as possible . the metalshop and woodshop jobs both have a crate inside them with an important item each - blue putty and sticky tape , respectively . these are not considered contraband , and so you can take them as you please . if you cannot be bothered jumping between both jobs , you can just use a pickaxe to chip through a portion of the wall and loot the crate . just remember to replace the wall block again after you ' re done .
wayne robson , the veteran canadian actor perhaps best known for playing a sticky - fingered former thief on the red green show , has died at the age of 65 .
wayne robson had been slated to appear in the stratford shakespeare festival ' s 2011 production of the grapes of wrath . the vancouver - born actor has died at the age of 64 . ( stratford shakespeare festival )
wayne robson , the veteran canadian actor perhaps best known for playing a sticky - fingered former thief on the red green show , has died at the age of 64 .
robson passed away peacefully at his home , according to the stratford shakespeare festival , where robson had been slated to perform in the grapes of wrath this season . cause of death was not disclosed .
wayne was an outstanding artist who had a diverse and accomplished career on stage , in film and on television , and his loss will be heavily felt not only here in stratford but across our country ,
stratford artistic director des mcanuff said in a statement late tuesday .
the festival will dedicate its 2011 production of the grapes of wrath to robson ' s memory .
the vancouver - born robson appeared in more than 100 stage productions , 120 tv shows and more than two dozen feature films since starting out as an actor in the mid - 1960s .
early on , the prolific actor was cast in a host of projects filming around vancouver and also appeared in the robert altman movies mccabe & mrs . miller and popeye . as the 1980s progressed , he began developing a national presence , with his screen credits including genie - nominated roles in films like the grey fox and bye bye blues as well as his gemini award - winning performance as a desperate gangster in the tv movie and then you die .
a second gemini would come in 1994 for his turn as christie logan in anne wheeler ' s television adaptation of margaret laurence ' s classic the diviners . his tv appearances in recent years have included murdoch mysteries , the kids in the hall : death comes to town and little mosque on the prairie .
he also maintained a career on the stage , most recently portraying the title character in tuesdays with morrie in sudbury in november 2010 .
in the brief period since wayne joined the festival company , he very quickly became close to us all with his enthusiasm , good humour and enormous talent ,
stratford general director antoni cimolino said in a statement .
he was generous in sharing stories from his past and from his vast experience in theatre across many countries dating back to the 1960s . he was immensely practical and yet a true imaginative child of the stage light .
robson is survived by his children , ivy and louis , and their mother , lynn .
wayne robson , left , played a former thief - turned - handyman on the red green show . robson is seen with the comedy ' s stars steve smith , centre , and patrick mckenna . ( cbc )
audience relations , cbc p . o . box 500 station a toronto , on canada , m5w 1e6
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the residents of possum lodge head on a road trip to the states , hoping to win a contest and thus pay a fine .
trippy indie madeline ' s madeline is the movie that lakeith stanfield and boots riley from sorry to bother you want to see the most .
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] to cheer us up , we played a little game called
let ' s run something over
.
after the credits finish , there ' s a scene with red and harold in the van . red says that saving the lodge will make the world a better place and harold asks if he really believes that . then the director yells cut .
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the tomatometer score — based on the opinions of hundreds of film and television critics — is a trusted measurement of critical recommendation for millions of fans . it represents the percentage of professional critic reviews that are positive for a given film or television show .
movies and tv shows are certified fresh with a steady tomatometer of 75 % or higher after a set amount of reviews ( 80 for wide - release movies , 40 for limited - release movies , 20 for tv shows ) , including 5 reviews from top critics .
the series ' good - natured , self - deprecating extended joke about male regression , handyman incompetence and canadian humility are here in big - screen proportions , and it all works very well .
a pretty solid movie . . . one that should amuse casual admirers ( present company included ) while delighting the rabid fan .
the movie offers more corniness than laughs , delivered with a visual - drabness that fails to justify its packaging as a theatrical film .
smith forgot to include any of the subtle , language - based comedy that marked his career as an author and stand - up comedian , so that all we ' re left with are obvious sight gags and laborious moments of slapstick carnage .
it ' s essentially a red green show episode stretched to a 90 - minute movie , but with about the same number of laughs .
charming movie , as only the canadians can do . based on the
red green
television show . i like steve smith ' s character . it ' s dorky but got a lot of heart . they should ' ve had a love interest for red green in this movie .
this is red ' s best and only theatrical release feature film , shot in 35mm with a full movie crew and a budget in the millions . ( most of it to defend the lawsuits . )
the first thing to remember about the villain ' s lair , is that there are absolutely no tower guards . as such , you will not get shot , no matter how much heat you have on you . you can also chip walls at any time during the day without getting shot . start by buying a guard outfit first . each cell ( excluding your own ) has a camera inside it . dressing up as a guard or henchman will allow you to search another spy ' s desk without the camera getting suspicious . if you can knock out a henchman and take his outfit beforehand however , the guard outfit will be inferior . get a fake shoe from a desk if you can . it works like a contraband pouch , except it does not get confiscated if you get knocked out .
once you have acquired both of these items one way or another , it ' s time to move onto the next item - the keycard . this is located inside the henchman ' s quarters to the northeast of the lair . the door however , has a blue key lock . this means you must be a henchman . the guard outfit is not sufficient for this , even though henchmen will be fooled by it . as such , you need to acquire a henchman outfit by knocking out a henchman . ideally , try to find the fourth henchman on the roster , as he has the staff key . you ' ll be needing a copy of that next . if you ' re having trouble figuring out the fourth henchman , wait until evening rollcall , when the henchmen turn on their flashlights . and then go and find a henchman who has a flashlight , but is not at rollcall . there ' s a 50 % chance he has the staff key - the other 50 % is the work key . either way , once you ' ve identified him , wait for him to cross over into your cell block , and then make your move . you can make a flamethrower or cup of molten chocolate to instantly knock him out . you can also find a bomb surprise or garotting wire watch or sharp tea tray in another spy ' s desk , and they will all serve as instant knockout items , too . once he ' s down , take his henchman uniform . he may also have some memoir tapes on him . take those as well , as they are a necessary component for the voice recording . finally , take his staff key and make a copy of it , but remember to give the staff key back before he wakes up again .
once you have the fake fingerprint , the voice recording , and the keycard , you can escape at any time you wish . if you choose to do it at night time however , you will need to create a bed dummy for your bed , as well as use your henchman or guard outfit to avoid being sent to solitary . head to the rocket and use the three items . the left console requires the keycard , the middle console requires the voice recording , and the right console requires the fake fingerprint . once you ' ve put the last item into the consoles , the game will end .
this page was last edited on 3 october 2017 , at 19 : 17 .
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closed caption ; 5 . 1 surround sound and 2 . 0 stereo ; red green goes to hollywood , a hilarious 60 - minute
mockumentary
featuring cast members and fans from all over the u . s . ; commentary by steve smith ( red green ) ; behind - the - scenes interviews with cast and crew ; photo gallery ; theatrical trailer
side # 1 - - 1 . the goose [ 8 : 21 ] 2 . from the beginning [ 7 : 46 ] 3 . $ 10 , 000 idea [ 7 : 30 ] 4 . minnesota bound [ 10 : 05 ] 5 . being followed [ 9 : 07 ] 6 . road block [ 9 : 13 ] 7 . harold kidnapped [ 13 : 58 ] 8 . the showdown [ 10 : 30 ] 9 . bus attack [ 7 : 14 ] 10 . harold ' s night [ 7 : 31 ]
side # 1 - - play movie scene index special features red green goes hollywood behind the scenes steve smith ( red green ) patrick mckenna ( harold ) richard fitzpatrick ( robert stiles ) melissa dimarco ( deputy dawn ) eric till ( director ) & steve smith theatrical trailer photo gallery set - up 5 . 1 surround sound 2 . 0 stereo audio commentary with steve smith
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a psychological horror film from the midwest - based independent director john d . hancock , ' ' suspended animation ' ' is a sturdy , well - made piece that never quite overcomes its structural flaws .
tom kempton ( alex mcarthur ) is a celebrated animator who winters in northern michigan , where a snowmobile accident leads him into the clutches of two weird sisters , vanessa and ann boulette . vanessa ( laura esterman ) is a willowy former dancer and ann ( sage allen ) an overweight homebody , and they have been operating their own girl - power version of the notorious wisconsin farmhouse of the 1950 ' s serial killer ed gein , butchering passers - by and creating knick - knacks and gourmet meals from their body parts .
after a slam - bang opening ' ' suspended animation , ' ' which opens today in new york , chicago and los angeles , goes into something of a coma itself with the tedious exposition necessary to get the plot convolutions across . it slowly develops that clara , who is unaware of her heritage , has a sinister 15 - year - old son ( fred meyers ) , who may have inherited his grandmother ' s homicidal tendencies . at least that is tom ' s suspicion when he comes across a mass of human tissue wrapped in aluminum foil and hidden in the boy ' s toolbox .
the situation is creepy , but the screenplay by dorothy tristan , mr . hancock ' s wife and frequent collaborator , has trouble transforming it into genuine suspense . the menace remains vague and unfocused until one major character makes a not entirely unexpected reappearance in the last act , by which point much of the tension has been lost .
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mr . hancock , however , remains a fine director of actors , and ms . esterman , a gifted stage actress making a rare film appearance , delivers an eerily ambiguous performance , part lovable eccentric and part hannibal lecter . though the film was shot on high - definition video , mr . hancock ' s framing has the steadiness and precision of classic 35 - millimeter filmmaking , and his editing , far from the pointless mtv pyrotechnics in the current remake of ' ' the texas chainsaw massacre , ' ' is all but invisible and much more effective for it .
directed by john d . hancock ; written by dorothy tristan ; director of photography , misha suslov ; edited by dennis o ' connor ; music by angelo badalamenti ; production designer , don jacobson ; produced by mr . hancock and robert j . hiler ; released by first run features . at the quad cinema , 34 west 13th street , greenwich village . running time : 114 minutes . this film is not rated .
with : alex mcarthur ( tom kempton ) , laura esterman ( vanessa boulette ) , sage allen ( ann boulette ) , rebecca harrell ( hilary kempton ) , maria cina ( clara hansen ) and fred meyers ( sandor hansen ) .
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ant - man and the wasp , starring paul rudd and evangeline lilly , took the top spot at . . .
hbo ' s new series sharp objects premieres july 8 and follows amy adams as camille . . .
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if the women don ' t find you handsome , they should at least find you handy .
a sketch comedy show ( 19912006 ) produced by and starring canadian comic steve smith , centered around the members of possum lodge , a backwoods hunting camp somewhere in northern ontario . it loosely parodies
outdoor
tv shows generally , and the iconic red fisher show ( which ran in canada from 1968 to 1989 ) in particular .
the show is hosted by the president of the lodge , philosopher , handyman , outdoorsman , and basically very average man red green ( smith ) , with technical direction provided by his painfully geeky nephew harold ( patrick mckenna ) .
episodes are usually framed by red and harold discussing some activity or event affecting the lodge or its members . this most often involves a wild scheme either to raise money or clean up some kind of environmental disaster before the authorities clamp down . or , not infrequently , both . red ' s updates — and the resulting arguments with harold — are intercut throughout the show with various scenes of red talking to lodge members about said issue .
well , i ' m not gonna be calling the u . s . air force , harold . what do i say ? we ' ve got a missile ? they take that as a threat , we ' re in real trouble .
harold , it ' s after six ; he ' s gone home .
since the lodge members include such sterling intellects as ranger gord the ( extremely ) lonely forest ranger , dougie franklin the mechanic , edgar montrose the half - deaf explosives enthusiast , arnie dogen the injury - prone roofer and aspiring country singer , winston rothschild , iii , the prissy sewage magnate , mike hammer the itinerant felon , dalton humphrey the avaricious storekeeper , hap shaughnessy the pathological liar , buzz sherwood the hippie pilot , and ed frid the hamster - phobic animal control officer . . . not a lot ever tends to get done , except by way of confusing the issue further .
the lodge members are often famous canadian actors such as graham greene ( edgar ) , gordon pinsent ( hap ) , colin mochrie ( in a small role as hotdog expert frank kepke ) and paul gross ( as naive yuppie kevin black ) .
i ' m a man , but i can change , if i have to , i guess .
another popular segment is
adventures with bill
, featuring the title character ' s attempts ( or more accurately , spectacular failures ) to get a grip on the whole outdoorsman gig , in slapstick pantomime shown in black and white and narrated by red .
the possum lodge word game
is a typically loose attempt at a password - esque game show , with red and harold trying to get a lodge member to say a certain word for a prize .
culture is not unknown here at the lodge , either — it may be gravely wounded , but it sure isn ' t being ignored . red is often seen in short transitional vignettes playing guitar and singing ( accompanied by harold on spoons or homemade drum ) , or reciting poetry . occasionally he simply addresses his fellow middle - aged schlubs directly and rather poignantly , concluding with
remember , i ' m pulling for ya , we ' re all in this together .
the show always ends with the sounds of the lodge meeting beginning , in the basement . red stays upstairs for a moment to deliver a quasi - aesop and a message to his wife , bernice .
often the opening of the lodge meeting will run behind the closing credits , with the studio audience as the lodge members .
and to the rest of you , thanks for watching . on behalf of myself and harold and the whole gang up here at possum lodge , keep your stick on the ice .
the entire series can be watched for free on the show ' s official youtube channel .
accidental aiming skills : in the black - and - white segment of
guinness world records
, red and dalton are attempting to destroy a lamp by putting rocks and balls in slingshots , and thwarting mike ' s attempts to just whack it with a board . after they build a supersized slingshot that accidentally launches mike into a tree ( instead of the bowling ball they intended to launch ) , mike gets angry , picks up the board , and throws it . . . straight into the lamp .
affectionate parody : both poking fun at , and celebrating , the foibles of middle - aged men .
the red green book , authored by the show ' s creators and published in 1995 , contains lots of interesting trivia about the lodge . for instance , lodge membership is open to all genders , all races , religions and sexual orientations . to get in , you just need to have access to tools , trucks , building materials , explosives , medical supplies , legal services or cash .
the names of some of the segments were revealed in the book too . the segment where two lodge members give the viewers advice on how to get out of a jam with their wives is called buddy system , while the segment where red gives a monologue to his fellow middle - aged men while sitting at a desk winding a fishing lure is called north of 40 .
motor vehicle used , seen or mentioned in the series . including buzz ' s seaplanes .
one of the articles in red green talks cars : a love story told readers what their car indicated about them . anyone who drives an
old car that barely runs
is a lodge member . more specific examples include stinky peterson ' s trabant , moose thompson ' s gremlin , douglas hendrychuk ' s nash , harold ' s pinto and red ' s possum van .
almost famous name : harold tells red that he ' s been asked to be in a magazine ad for dodge . red excitedly agrees when he hears that not only will he be depicted in a hot tub surrounded by bikini - clad girls , but he gets the product for free ! he ' s a bit disappointed when it turns out he ' s just going to get his picture taken in front of a green screen and have it edited in later , but he ' s still excited to get a free dodge truck . at the end of the episode harold clarifies that the company is a swedish company named
doj
. . . that makes adult diapers . . . and there are dozens of crates full of them outside .
amusing injuries : present all over the place , no one is safe from this . adventures with bill turns it up to eleven .
and knowing is half the battle : parodied in ranger gord ' s educational cartoons , in which a muscular version of gord gives humorously inaccurate advice regarding forest life ( e . g . , that stones are really eggs ) . often , the funny animal representations of red and harold would actually give correct information in response , but since these are gord ' s cartoons , his explanations inevitably turn out to be true anyway .
1991 , 1993 seasons : a paint - by - numbers of the lodge quickly getting colored in .
1994 - 1997 seasons : a flythrough of a cityscape , followed by a crash into the
new red green show
logo and a 180 - degree turn to reveal the lodge .
anti role model : in more than one
handyman corner
, red suggests one way to get the supplies you need is to steal them .
aren ' t you going to ravish me ? : non - sexual version . when the women of possum lake get together to chat , several lodge members spy on them with a microphone to find out what their wives are saying about them , expecting lots of complaints . they ' re very insulted when none of the women even mention their husbands at all .
in one episode , red advises teenagers against doing crime , saying ,
just say no to assault , break - and - enter , arson , murder , theft , drug trafficking , and . . . oh , yeah , real estate sales .
red : yeah . uh , so i ' m i ' m gonna add a special event to it . harold is gonna do a cannonball off the top of rock reef point , singing the national anthem , butt - naked , with his hair on fire . that okay with you , harold ?
harold : oh , yeah . yeah , yeah , whatever . . . hey , wait a minute , i don ' t know the national anthem !
aside glance : red frequently looks at the camera in
adventures with bill
.
in one episode , red , dalton , and mike hurt themselves . mike goes to a masseuse and feels better , and recommends red and dalton go as well , which they first refuse but change their minds once they find out she ' s attractive . it turns out she ' s a male undercover cop , and red and dalton are disgusted , but mike doesn ' t care and plans to keep going , since he was the only one going there specifically for treatment and not just to get touched by a pretty girl ( although you would think he ' d at least be concerned about the cop part ) .
audience participation : in later seasons , the studio audience would provide the
three little words men find so hard to say
in
the experts
sketches .
new member night
would also have volunteers from the studio audience play the prospective new lodge member .
author appeal : steve smith is apparently something of a car buff in real life . throughout the show there are hundreds of shout outs and take thats to various cars ( the chrysler k - car is a favorite target ) and at least half of all the handyman corner projects involved something to do with cars . a lot of gags also involve beer , something that smith even lampshades in his introduction to one of the episodes on the dvd collections .
bait and switch : the prizes for the possum lodge word game are presented in this manner with whoever is hosting ( usually harold ) exciting the contestant with something that sounds desirable but only to reveal that the prize is ridiculously cheap . . . and occasionally used .
bonnie kisses harold , hard , in the finale when the two are officially wed . also counts as a crowning moment of funny , since she does it before red can even tell harold ,
you may now kiss the bride .
: possum lodge is full of these , by red ' s own admission . of course , when big eater is the norm , the guy
red : moose would eat a garden shed if you put enough hot sauce on it .
: red discovers that ranger gord has some pictures of bigfoot that are actually clear and in focus , proving bigfoot really exists . he excitedly tells gord that the two of them should sell the pictures to a major tv network and get rich . however , gord insists that since he is the professional forest ranger , he should do all the talking to maintain credibility . red promptly gives the pictures back , knowing that nothing could give them
in one of gord ' s educational cartoons , he lectures on how to protect oneself against a sasquatch . because of its eponymous big feet , gord explains , the sasquatch usually attacks by kickboxing its opponent , so one should keep their arms in front of their face at all times .
basically everything that comes out of hap ' s mouth . it ' s not that hap is a bad liar in as much as his stories are so over the top that there ' s no way he could ' ve done all of it .
same for doc render in the second season . there ' s speculation from the other members whether or not doc is an actual doctor ; well - deserved speculation given that doc treats a bullet wound with several boxes of band - aids .
blazing inferno hellfire sauce : red mixes up a batch for a lodge barbecue . it consisted mostly of ketchup and mustard , with some various hot peppers thrown in and some other ingredients , including the
secret ingredient
, which was some blue goop in an unlabelled container ( harold gets it analyzed , it ' s jet fuel ) . to demonstrate how hot it is , dalton tastes a little bit on a toothpick and is clearly in serious pain . then harold tastes a big spoonful .
blind without em : happens to bill once when he does boxing with harold . red removes bill ' s glasses for him , thinking that one shouldn ' t fight a guy with glasses , and sets them on top of a pail in a corner of the ring . he does not realize that bill does have a vision problem . he squints at the glasses on the pail , thinking it ' s harold and delivers an uppercut to it , only for it to fall down and hit him on the head , knocking him out and leading harold to be the winner by default .
: harold says red ' s
keep your stick on the ice
speech in
the catfish project
when red is in a traumatized daze .
harold also says
keep your stick on the ice
( and imitating red ' s gravelly voice in the process ) in the final episode .
harold : oh , good , okay , yeah . ' cause usually you have a plan and you ' re an idiot , but this time . . .
harold :
dear experts , how are you ?
ranger gord : well actually , i ' m a little upset today , because i lost my favorite pair of sunglasses . ( gord is wearing said sunglasses on top of his head ) but y ' know , it ' s not the end of the world . no way . that doesn ' t happen until the year 2015 , in november , on a thursday , and it ' s after lunch . okay ? so you can ' t get too upset when you lose something . the thing is , you have to remember to replace the thing that you lost with something new , and the real tricky part is , you have to remember to replace the same thing with the same thing . in other words , you can ' t replace a pair of sunglasses by buying a waffle iron . okay ? there it is . ( the sunglasses fall over his eyes ) excuse me , i think a fuse blew . ( red pulls his sunglasses off ) oh no , it ' s okay , someone ' s got it . ( after much audience laughter / applause ) harold : . . . our letter continues . . . .
canada , eh ? : often played straight , or exaggerated for laughs . expect lots of references to curling and tim hortons .
canis latinicus : possum lodge ' s motto is
quando omni flunkus moritati
. which means , quite appropriately ( and this being dog - latin , approximately ) ,
when all else fails , play dead .
rival salamander lodge ( which was created by a disgruntled possum lodge member out of spite and didn ' t even manage to last the whole episode ) adopted the motto
quando omni flunkus terra retreatum
(
when all else fails , hide under a rock
) .
on behalf of myself , and harold , and the whole gang up here at the possum lodge , keep your stick on the ice .
if the women don ' t find you handsome , they should at least find you handy .
after giving advice to fellow middle - aged men :
remember , i ' m pullin ' for ya . we ' re all in this together .
inverted when harold presented the north of 40 segment in red ' s place and closed with
remember , you ' re on your own . don ' t push it .
the man ' s prayer :
i ' m a man . . . but i can change . . . if i have to . . . i guess .
inverted at the very end of the show , on the very last episode , where the closing was changed to
i ' m a man . . . but i ' ve changed . . . ' cause i had to . . . oh , well .
in one episode the lodge had to cater to a group of women , so the man ' s prayer is replaced with the woman ' s prayer :
i ' m a woman . . . hear me roar . . . i ' m in charge . . . get over it !
it ' s not smart , or correct , but it ' s one of the things that makes us what we are .
if at first you don ' t succeed , switch to power tools .
if it ain ' t broke , you ' re not trying .
in the intros to the 1996 episodes , red would say ,
what you ' re looking at here are some segments from this particular show , the main message being , ' for gosh sakes , don ' t even think about changing the channel . ' i tell ya something : if you want to make sense of this program , you have to give it your undivided attention .
in the same episodes , during the bumper leading into the first commercial break , which shows a clip of the show to follow , red says ,
stay tuned . whatever this is , we ' ve got lots more of it .
welcome to harold ' s handicrafts , where crafty hands make handy crafts !
used by harold to start the
harold ' s handicrafts
segment that featured in several season 5 episodes .
celebrity paradox : edgar ( played by graham greene ) mentions that
that native actor in dances with wolves was really good , they shoulda given him the oscar .
over the course of the series , harold generally grew from an awkward , incompetent teenager into a less awkward , successful adult , with even red acknowledging him as a man . lampshaded by red when harold leaves the lodge for a job in the city :
looks like harold has finally matured and grown up , but i don ' t see it happening to me anytime soon .
during the two seasons when harold was absent , dalton , mike and winston filled in for him , became more rounded characters and turned into regulars .
the chew toy : bill from the
adventures with bill
segments . he withstood a level of physical abuse that would put wile e . coyote to shame .
the second season of the show introduced a host of new characters , none of whom were ever seen again afterward , save for the odd reference here and there .
a couple characters only appeared in two episodes in the nineties : earl battersby , a local bait shop owner who believed in the paranormal ; and kelly cook ( one of the first female characters on the show ) , a meddling network executive who only appears in two season 10 episodes .
special mention goes to sparky hoover , a radio host / school bus driver who only appeared in
big guy little guy
.
cloudcuckoolander : to be honest , most of the lodge members could fit into this category , but ranger gord was undeniably the standout example . see loners are freaks below .
the comically serious : the audience members who played the prospective new members in the
new member night
segments always acted this way , and made things even funnier by raising their eyebrows or frowning as the cast member talks about them .
mike : how do you guys feel about how leading men are presented in today ' s movies ? red : well , i haven ' t seen any of them , but i ' m sure they ' re all crap .
convenience store gift shopping : red tried to do this for bernice for christmas , then tried to justify it by saying that the sunoco logo on the free gas station mugs matched their kitchen .
when red replaced the possum van with a new possum van , he then turned the old possum van into an air boat .
cool clear water : subverted . with all the snowmobiles falling through the ice , run off from the lodge and the marina , the appropriately named mercury creek , and the proximity of
stinky
peterson , everyone knows how dirty possum lake is .
up until the eighth season , harold would start the show by introducing red in some random ( and sometimes true or untrue ) way or another .
likewise , at the end of every episode , red would always address his wife through ,
if my wife is watching , i ' ll be coming straight home . . .
( from the second season onward , he addresses that he will be home after the lodge meeting ) , and then says some remark based on the events in the episode , before thanking the audience for watching and saying ,
keep your stick on the ice .
cowardly lion : ed frid was afraid of every animal , but he sometimes pulls through just fine .
crawl : the subject of one
handyman corner
. red rigged a ruler to cover the crawl so it didn ' t distract his viewing of gilligan ' s island .
, everyone in town gets dna tested hoping to get a match , and therefore be entitled to the inheritance . shockingly ,
of the dna tests turn out to be exactly the same . incestuous implications aside , this unfortunately only entitles everyone to a few bucks each since the inheritance has to be split so many ways .
it turns out that this was because mike stole all the test tubes , so the testers had to use the lids off pickle jars , and simply ended up testing the chemical composition of pickle juice . the reason this matched the old guy ' s dna was because he was always pickled himself .
non - word example : starting in season 7 , a once an episode gag during the end credits was harold ( or another character like dalton or mike ) telling the possum lodge members to sit down so the meeting can start . then they immediately say ,
all rise !
, the group performs the chant , and sit back down again . what was the point of sitting down the first time again ?
red green :
we ' re out there in our own vehicles , burning gas , got the sunglasses on , looking good . people seeing us going by would have no idea we don ' t know where we are . and we ' re not really excited about sharing that information . a man does not embrace the concept of going up to total strangers and saying , ' you may not know this , but i ' m a moron , ' whereas the woman he ' s with is only too happy to share that information [ ] men aren ' t lost . they ' re just going the long way .
it also served as the plot for a fourth - season episode when buster hadfield and his wife went on a trip to visit their relatives . unfortunately , since buster hates to stop and ask for directions when he gets lost , he ends up driving all over north america .
red green : old man sedgewick ' s moved into the lodge , so now he ' s got the bunch of us running around fetching things for him . bran muffins , hot water bottles . . . and of course the latest sports illustrated swimsuit edition .
old man sedgewick will be playing the field until they plow him under .
disco dan : buzz sherwood , who is still a new age retro hippie .
does this make me look fat ? : red talks about the dangers of this question in several episodes .
: red once mentioned that he used this excuse on a regular basis during his school days .
red : if my dog ate as much homework as i said he did , he ' d be passing firelogs .
double entendre : red usually slips one into his closing message to bernice . it ' s usually relevant to the plot of the episode in some way and its message is always essentially
hope you ' re up for some sex tonight .
double meaning : after harold gets a chain letter and passes it on , he gets a $ 100 bill in the mail , causing the whole lodge to go chain - letter - crazy hoping to receive the same good fortune . it ' s not until the end of the episode that harold clarifies that he received a bill for $ 100 .
driving test : after an incident involving the possum van and a speed bump , red has his driver ' s license revoked and has to get retested to get it back . when it seems that red is doomed to fail the written portion , he sends harold in his place , who gets into an accident on the driving portion .


it 's always jan is an american situation comedy starring janis paige , which aired on cbs in the 1955-1956 season .

it was the lead-in program at 9:30 p.m. eastern on saturday evenings to the first season of the long-running western , gunsmoke , starring james arness .

it ' s always jan

there ' s cast trouble with janis paige ' s
it ' s always jan .
daniel kitson in “it ' s always right now , until it ' s later . ”
friendship meets its test when the boy friend jan ' s roommate brings home falls for jan .
jan , josie and pat hatch a plot to get jan ' s agent married off . but
the patient who falls :
it ' s always a trade - off
.
from 12aug56 through 21sep56 , nbc aired reruns of
it ' s always jan
on its weekday afternoon
comedy time
series .
to ask other readers questions about it ' s always the husband , please sign up .
it ' s always right now , until it ' s later the monologuist daniel kitson returns to st . ann ' s warehouse in brooklyn with this show .
watch the new , racially charged trailer for it ' s always sunny in philadelphia ' s 12th season ( video ) .
we’d love your help . let us know what’s wrong with this preview of it ' s always the husband by michele campbell .
the patient who falls :
it ' s always a trade - off
. - pubmed - ncbi
our summer festival is back . it ' s all outside and it ' s all free .
after blowing her emergency fund on a demo recording , jan and friends are feeling desperate and destitute . but then henry cooper , jan’s manager ,
lead to sing in a musical . even better for jan , mansfield wants an unknown voice specifically instead of a known face . so begins jan’s journey
jan ' s curiosity is aroused when she begins receiving gifts and flowers from an unknown admirer .
jan ' s daughter is stagestruck . [ ta / 21apr56 long island city ny star journal ]
irate neighbors in jan ' s apartment house demand that couple with a crying baby be evicted , but jan takes an interest in the child and solves the problem .
due to a phone slip - up , pat , jan’s roommate , mistakenly gets a call from someone named seymour . the ensuing chat goes so well jan recommends pat go
jan ' s friends try to find a suitable husband for her . [ ta / melbourne age ]
an employee walks through the lobby of google ' s washington headquarters , jan . 8 , 2015 .
with gustavo dudamel during jan ' s lectures for the los angeles philharmonic beethoven series , october 2015 .
the eleventh season of it ' s always sunny in philadelphia premiered january 6 , 2016 on fxx and concluded on march 9 , 2016 . it consists of 10 episodes .
the next episode of always sunny , “ the gang goes to a water park , ” airs jan . 11 at 10 p . m . on fxx .
jan envisages spectacular success when a writer promise to write special material for her .
jan swafford , michael tilson thomas , and james sinclair during a recording of ives ' s fourth in chicago .
a theater review on monday about “it’s always right now , until it’s later , ” a one - man show by daniel kitson at st . ann’s warehouse in brooklyn , misstated the word of which mr . kitson asks , “who among us doesn’t really enjoy” it ? it is “toboggan , ” not “bobsled . ”
a film - maker and photographer by profession , browning first read it “more in visual terms” but has re - read it many times , and “i always find different things about it” .
jon ' s roommate pat brings home a boy friend who promptly falls for jan . the situation becomes more complicated when
because she thinks she has neglected her daughter , jan turns down a lucrative engagement .
ordered . his patient is josie , but he ' d rather consult with jan .
“mum used to get fed up talking about it , ” says browning . “she did get so irritated with people calling it a romantic novel . because she always said it was a study in jealousy . ”
jan meets a happy - go - lucky man who reminds her of her late husband .
jan finds herself becoming interested in the handsome beau . [ ta / philadelphia pa inquirer ]
21 - jan - 1956 cbs / 21jan56 ( in notice : 1955 ) / lp7339 .
jan and her roommate have a nerve - wracking day . [ ta / melbourne age ]
and two friends , a secretary and a model . in the first episode jan is upset about the daughter ' s behavior .
‘we try not to shy away from jokes that might make people uncomfortable’ . . . glenn howerton as dennis in it’s always sunny in philadelphia . photograph : patrick mcelhenney / fxx
“maybe that’s the lesson here , ” he sings . “things are not always that clear . we have a lot in common , but too much of it is fear . ”
harry cooper , jan’s manager , ran all the way from 49th street to tell her the demo record she cut paid off . it got her the attention of movie producer
jan is upset when her press agent releases an
item
that she and a movie star are seeing each other . jan claims she hasn ' t even met her
beau .
jan is dennis ' s former roommate . he is european . jan is into anonymous sex ( as well as dennis ) . he sends dennis to use the
glory hole
with frank . and then they kick him out .
young stanley schreiber decides to leave his father ' s delicatessen for a job in arabia . jan intervenes . [ ta / melbourne age ]
leonard slatkin introduces jan to the detroit symphony at the start of his residency as visiting scholar with the orchestra ' s 2016 brahms festival .
and what about rebecca’s cruel streak ; did she possess that ? “no . but , there again , who says it was cruelty ? it’s maxim’s version , isn’t it ? there’s so much in that book , you know . was he lying ? why is it that everybody else thought the sun shone out of her a - - - ? there’s never a bad word about rebecca except from max . that’s why it runs and runs . ”
a rival agent tries to persuade jan to desert her own agent . [ ta / melbourne age ]
it’s always sunny in philadelphia returned to television wednesday night , kicking off its 12th season with what may be the series most controversial episode of its run , even for a show that ' s pulled off blackface in the past .
this is strictly a filler upload , as this intro has already been uploaded by someone else . this is the opening intro to the 1955 - 1956 tv series
it ' s always jan
, which aired on cbs . again , this is a filler upload which serves no purpose .
a constellation of light bulbs glows from the stage at st . ann’s warehouse in brooklyn , where the monologuist extraordinaire daniel kitson has set up his own planetarium . in “it’s always right now , until it’s later , ” which opened on sunday night and runs through jan . 29 , mr . kitson maps an earthly cosmology : the points of light in two separate lives that might otherwise be lost to the shadows .
jan is faced with a problem when she finds herself falling in love . a fun - loving irishman tries
jan is the object of a matchmaking campaign when neighbors send all unattached male friends to look her over .
the seed of the story lay in du maurier’s jealousy of jan ricardo , the first fiancée of her husband . “i know that she came across one or two letters or cards , fairly sort of harmless things , where jan did sign ' jan ricardo’ with this wonderful great r , ” says browning , flourishing his hand in the air . it is a portentous curlicue that is emulated in the book .
it ' s a free app loved by millions . is duolingo wasting your time ?
jan ' s neighbors form a corporation to start her on a career as a movie actress . she blithely invests the money in an elaborate wardrobe ,
jan tries to comfort pat by reminding her that sometimes , the best things in life are both unexpected and outside one’s comfort zone . will this be
jan swafford ' s intelligent , gracefully written biography…offers perhaps the richest and most integrated portrait we ' ve yet had of brahms as man and artist .
when daughter josie comes home singing the praises of a school chum ' s mother , jan takes her daughter to the night club to show josie that her mom ' s no slouch either .
jan takes pity on an elderly man who sacrificed his life for his sisters . [ ta / melbourne age ]
jan and her roommate quarrel and decide to live separately , until josie provides the happy solution to their problem .
,
which actually should have been titled
it ' s a rotten comedy .
that is , until you mention duolingo . the little app with the friendly owl has become the absolute go - to resource for newbies trying to acquire any language . it’s free , it’s accessible and it is based on solid research . what’s not to love , right ?
it all came across as rather undistinguished , and with jan ending the show by addressing the camera and saying
good night
to the home audience , you had the feeling that the show ' s personnel hardly thought it was worth taking seriously .
took elements of different popular tv series and movies from 1955 when it debuted and managed to come up with an unexceptional jumble that lasted just one year . up - and - coming starlet janis paige played a widowed single mother whose hairstyle resembled lucy ricardo ( not surprisingly ,
it ' s always jan
was a desilu production as was
i love lucy
) .
jan goes to orphanage to
adopt
a girl after her 10 - year - old runs away to there .
afraid of neglecting her little daughter , jan decides to refuse a lucrative singing contract , but the child ' s diary proves startling . [ ta / melbourne age ]
back to the minors . anxious to save the rookie ' s job and help brooklyn win the pennant , jan uses a system that all true baseball fans understand to
after saving her from getting hit on by a creepy bar crawler , pat and mrs . johnson chalk up jan’s romantic misfortunes to her job as a nightclub singer ;
right , but once you have aids , you always have aids . so you want us to do an episode where the characters have aids , and then they just don’t have aids the next episode ? it’s just stuff where it doesn’t make any sense or it’s gross because , “oh , that would be gross . a condom falls in someone’s mouth ! ” that’s just not funny to me . what’s funny to me is when a character wants something and the audience can relate to that desire , whatever it is . to me , when things go too far , it’s when i don’t know why the character’s doing what they’re doing . it’s not as much about the material or the subject matter , and more about when comedies have characters doing things that don’t make fucking sense . to me , that’s when it goes too far , when somebody puts their dick in something for reasons i can’t understand .
swafford ' s analysis of brahms ' s performing career as pianist and conductor is especially fascinating .
2017 update : duolingo ' s business model is always evolving , and i feel confident that this is bringing lots of improvements and more transparency than ever . thank you , duolingo .
the aftermath of jan swafford ' s after spring rain was a respectful appreciation and even a little awe . it ' s a gorgeous work , rich in textures and colors and emotional tension… . true to his own words , his music
sounds only like itself .
it ' s a free app loved by millions . is duolingo wasting your time ? by fluent language
let me report that jan swafford ' s midsummer variations stands a good chance of long - term survival…i like it because at all points it struck me as solidly built , like a piece of furniture . the fast section is particularly vivacious , and the ending both spacious and handsome .
a 20 - year - old errand boy embarrasses jan by declaring his love for her . [ ta / philadelphia pa inquirer ]
jan attempts to break up the engagement of her friend val and a five times married playboy . [ ta / melbourne age ]
jan soon discovers that the doctor is interested in her and not as a patient . [ ta / albany ny times union ]
experience does remind jan she can still find love 9 years after the death of her military husband . [ the janis pages ]
on a date with him . however , pat and jan know absolutely nothing about seymour ; who he is , what he looks like , or even if he’s a perfect match .
frank falls out of a window and his injury makes him think it ' s 2006 , so the gang use it as a chance to correct past mistakes .
jan takes drastic action when her 10 - year - old daughter becomes
stage struck .
[ ta / philadelphia pa inquirer ]
justin fox , “ at amazon , it’s all about cash flow ” , harvard business review , 2014 .
we tend to think of composers as always themselves , at least after the juvenilia : mozart always mozart , brahms always brahms , ives always ives . in reality , every significant artist begins with a distinctive temperament but still has to grow into who he or she is . for charles ives , that process was bound to be a lengthy one , because he began in a singular place and was headed in a singular direction—a direction he himself only slowly came to understand . the uproarious ragtime dances , first sketched c . 1900 - 04 , are an important way station on that journey .
jan swafford ' s charles ives goes a long way toward dispelling or clarifying many of the most prominent myths surrounding the life and music of perhaps american ' s greatest composer… . swafford ' s biography presents us with the most complete picture yet of this fascinating and often contradictory man and his music .
“it goes on and it goes on , ” says kits browning , du maurier’s son , leaning back in his sofa at ferryside , the house in fowey , in cornwall , that has been in the du maurier family since the twenties . “it’s the old cliché . it’s a bloody good story . and it still sells more than any of her other books . ” an impressive 4 , 000 a month , by the reckoning of its publishers virago , and it has never been out of print .
jan gets into hot water by borrowing money from her friends . she was tricked into paying a songstress for some
special material .
titled “ the gang turns black , ” always sunny ’s season 12 opener is a racially charged musical episode with a focus on body swapping , a la freaky friday o r 13 going on 30 . the always sunny crew filmed portions of the episode here in philly back in july 2016 , the first time they had filmed locally in two years .
the words it ' s always the husband carry a certain implication that any time a woman is murdered , her husband is the first suspect . that ' s how i thought this book would go , before i started reading it . but it was 6 hours into a 10 . 5 hour book before there was even any mention of husbands or marriages or murders . that ' s a heck of a long time to get to the point and required some patience . up to then , it ' s about three female college roommates and their antics . kate the rich spoiled bad girl , jenny t
it ’ s always sunny in philadelphia was created by rob mcelhenney . he also serves as executive producer along with glenn howerton , charlie day , michael rotenberg , nick frenkel , tom lofaro , scott marder and david hornsby . the show is produced by fx productions .
both mrs de winters were drawn from du maurier’s own character . “i always identified mum with the second , rather timid one , ” says browning . “it was totally split , because she was just as good as rebecca at the sailing and all that toughness . ”
it’s always sunny in philadelphia doesn’t always get enough credit . the fxx comedy series , preparing to launch its 12 th season , has managed to stay innovative ( and hilarious ) for more than a decade now , humming along as the entire landscape of half - hour television has transformed around it . it’s long been a show that thrives by pushing formal and social boundaries , using its nasty if buffoonish quintet of characters to harshly ( and repeatedly ) explore sexism , homophobia , xenophobia , racism—really , just about every form of hate or ignorance out there . indeed , the title of the very first sunny episode from 2005—“the gang gets racist”—still says it all .
pat invites the friends and neighbors to see a “demonstration” of jan stewart as a commercial product in a two - piece leopard bikini . the presentation
jan finds herself in the celebrity class when a publicity agent invents a romance between her and a film star . [ ta / melbourne age ]
it ' s been a while since an always sunny episode has fallen flat like
wolf cola : a public relations nightmare ,
which , i suppose , is a bit of a backhanded compliment . dry , slightly hacky chapters like this one don ' t happen very often . that ' s a good thing indeed , though it doesn ' t help make this one any funnier .
i’d say the worst plan he ever hatched – it’s tough to remember , 12 seasons in –certainly , when he talks about “the implication” in season six . that’s about as dark as it gets . he never did it , but he tried . in terms of what he’s actually done , though ? i might have to come back to that one .
3 out of 5 stars to it ' s always the husband , a new thriller and suspense novel set to release to the public on may 16 , 2017 , by michele campbell . it ' s a quick - read with a few slow spot , but keeps you guessing all throughout the chapters , almost playing a bit of russian roulette with who ' s behind the whole plot . why this book i saw it pop up on a few goodreads reviews . i looked on netgalley and thought it sounded like a strong psychological thriller . i was awarded the book in lieu of a fair and
over the last few years , always sunny has evolved into something more meta and self - referential , driven as much by its history as it is by original storylines . that sense of self - awareness usually keeps the show’s writing , and to a lesser extent its characters , in check . but the newly released trailer for always sunny season 12 , complete with a snippet of an upcoming musical episode , raises the question : has the gang finally gone too far ?
finally , margins also derive from a company’s culture , not necessarily from the industry in which it operates or the market it serves . apple prefers high margins , and they’re willing to sacrifice market share to get them . amazon prefers low margins . it is easy to go from high to low margins : that happens if a company gets dragged into a competition for lower prices . but it is equally easy to go from low to high margins—and it is also very dangerous , because not only does it mean that you have to sacrifice growth , it doesn’t fit in the company’s culture : thus it makes people complacent and there is no way back .
it ' s a great life
in the end came across as a sitcom for middle - aged men designed by middle - aged men , and even in that meager assignment it failed .
a day in the life of frank reynold ' s as he tries to keep up with the gang ' s newest scheme .
jan makes a record which wins her an audition with a hollywood producer , but she needs $ 500 to buy an impressive outfit . [ ta / melbourne age ]
jan is torn between loyalty and fame when a big - time agent offers her a prize engagement if she agrees to leave her present agent and sign with him .
a baseball team manager begs jan to break her spell over his pitcher , who spends every evening at the nightclub where she sings . [ ta / melbourne age ]
/ there isn’t really a need to retell the amazing story of amazon’s relationship with its investors . justin fox has done it in this
val is thrilled over her engagement to a wealthy and much - married playboy . he , however , is not too in love to overlook the charms of roommate jan .
when jan and her friends hire a male housekeeper , they become the enemies of every husband in their apartment house . [ ta / lowell sun , lowell , massachusetts ]
the trouble begins when jan and her girl friends hire a young man to keep house for them . the other women in the apartment house see how well the man does
after a whole day of striking out , jan finally lands a potential date in the form of mr . howard stone . they never become a serious couple , but the
there has even been rebecca : the musical , which had a three - year run in vienna before moving to japan , germany , south korea and sweden . “it is absolutely fantastic as a spectacle . almost as mrs danvers comes to the top of the stairs , there’s a sort of ' boo’ . it’s like pantomime , ” says browning . what , i wonder , might his mother have made of it ? “i think she’d be delighted . it’s a very gothic version . ”
we had such a good time doing the nightman cometh , and every year since then we’ve been talking about doing another musical episode , or an episode with musical elements . i always thought it would come in the form of some kind of nightman cometh sequel or a prequel , possibly . we talk about it every year , and it just never quite materialized . this was interesting because the idea for the episode came first , and it was such an insane idea .
pictured : ( l - r ) glenn howerton as dennis , charlie day as charlie , rob mcelhenney as mac , kaitlin olson as dee , and danny devito as frank in “the gang turns black , ” the opening episode of always sunny’s 12th season .
it was at milton hall that she conceived of mrs danvers . “she saw this tall , dark housekeeper woman . they were always called mrs , even if they weren’t married , like mrs hudson in sherlock holmes , ” says browning . “that’s where she first saw this terribly sinister - looking lady . i don’t think she ever spoke to her , it was just a look that sunk in . ”
jan proves to be a good neighbor and a cunning organizer when tenants petition the land - lord to evict the parents of a crying baby . [ ta / melbourne age ]
pat makes a blind date and then gets cold feet about dating someone she hasn ' t met . jan offers to fill in for pat , rather than disappoint the man .
after a phone call with seymour , jan tries to convince pat , sight unseen , to try going out on a date with him . she has absolutely no idea what he
actual rating : 3 . 5 stars it ' s always the husband by michele campbell is a 2017 st . martin ' s press publication . the interesting choice of title and the gorgeous cover aroused my interest in this novel . in my opinion , the storyline idea , albeit decent and promising , is not uncommon when it comes to the mystery fiction . the surprising aspect of this book given the genre it belongs to is the sophisticated and elaborate writing style . when i read the couple next door , for example , i was bitterly disap
sam walton meant it : each year , suppliers had to lower their price , or else they were out . and as related by charles fishman’s
meredith levinson , “ amazon’s it leader leaving huge customer service infrastructure as legacy ” ( an article about rick dalzell ) , cio , 2007 .
jan draws up a list of rules for her boyfriends to adhere to , but finds that mike allen is only too prepared to abide by them . [ ta / melbourne age ]
the provocation for jan swafford ' s piano quartet they who hunger was the plight of the homeless…though the subject matter is not discernible in any overt way , the piece has a world - weariness that is no doubt expressive of the composer ' s feeling . otherwise , the music is jaunty with motoric rhythms , lyrical and bluesy .
the way the show is described often is “wow , these guys don’t care . ” but that’s not true . i don’t think the show would work if it were truly hateful . it’s one thing for the characters to be misinformed , ignorant or bigoted . it’s another thing for the show to be misinformed , ignorant or bigoted . we can only do so much to educate ourselves about what it’s like to be a black person in america , and eventually you have to talk to someone who has actually been there . we try not to shy away from jokes that might make people uncomfortable , but never at the expense of being sensitive to people’s real life experience .
jan steward is showered with flowers and gifts by an unknown admirer , who turns out to be an elderly man who has absolutely no interest in her . [ ta / gettysburg times ]
fed up with all the creeps and pub crawlers , jan decides on a whim to get married . the problem is , she has no idea what she wants in a husband . and
this is , as ever , uncharted territory for always sunny . in its effort to maintain relevance and freshness after 11 solid seasons , the show is now headed down yet another precarious path , one that could either demonstrate its deft satirical touch once more or end at a place that’s more callous than clever . no matter , it should be fascinating to watch—a testament to sunny ’s rather remarkable continued significance , 12 years in .
it’s always the husband by michelle campbell is a 2017 st . martin’s press publication . i loved the title of this book because it is sort of a running joke - right ? so , i had to see which way the author would spin such a story with this title . unfortunately , this book was a stinker . if not for the need to find out who was going to be murdered and whodunit , i probably would have marked it as a dnf . therefore , because i am very behind on my reviews , i’m not going to spend a great deal of time writin
michele campbell’s debut , it’s always the husband —is a suspenseful and intriguing twisty
whodunit
and
howdunit
of dark secrets— a web of deceit , keeping you guessing to the final conclusion . three college roommates at carlisle college in new hampshire — aubrey , jenny , and kate are linked by a tragedy . each girl has their own desires , dreams , fears , and troubles . the complexities of friendship and acceptance . love / hate relationships . kate is the wild rich girl with a father’s connections
the concert really got down to business with jan swafford ' s highly evocative after spring rain played by the indianapolis symphony orchestra at the contemporary music festival . the exquisitely scored work is rich in mood and atmosphere , spare and transparent in sound and lyrical in effect .
google is no longer a technology company , it’s a search engine . the search technology was developed a decade ago . it’s a bet that there will be no one else who will come up with a better search technology . so , you invest in google , because you’re betting against technological innovation in search . and it’s like a bank that generates enormous cash flows every year , but you can’t issue a dividend , because the day you take that $ 30 billion and send it back to people you’re admitting that you’re no longer a technology company . that’s why microsoft can’t return its money . that’s why all these companies are building up hordes of cash , because they don’t know what to do with it , but they don’t want to admit they’re no longer tech companies .
farhad manjoo , “ i want it today : how amazon’s ambitious new push for same - day delivery will destroy local retail ” , slate , 2012 .
the customer’s point of view is actually embedded in many parts of amazon’s culture and operations . according to brad stone’s the everything store , all external communication , including that of the company towards investors , are made as if they’ll ultimately be read by the customers — which they eventually are . also , all internal documents tend to be written from the customer’s point of view , which helps amazon making decision - making more efficient . quite simply , focusing on the customer is amazon’s big idea : it helps in making decisions in the face of urgency ( “is it in the customer’s best interest ? ” ) , and it attracts the superfans the company needs to make its user community more engaged .
remember too that you don’t just want to assess the candidate . you want them to fall in love with you . really . you want them to have a great experience , have their concerns addressed , and come away feeling like they just had the best day of their lives . interviews are awkward because you’re having an intimate conversation with someone you just met , and the candidate is in a very vulnerable position . it’s always worth investing time to make sure they feel good at the end of it , because they will tell other people about their experience—and because it’s the right way to treat people .
meanwhile , the company’s engineering staff had apparently been killing itself to transform amazon’s large it infrastructure into a collection of web services . it was not an easy task . in his now famous “platform rant” , former amazon employee steve yegge detailed what it took for amazon to deploy its current it architecture . everybody had to work incredibly hard to deploy the new web services while ensuring continuity of operations . multiple unexpected pitfalls were spotted along the way . the legendary and frightening rick dalzell , amazon’s cio at the time , had to whip everybody for years to make sure that the radical it upheaval was achieved on time at a mastered cost .
frank goes off the rails , singing to dee that he’s going to say words he hasn’t “had the chance to say before” now that he is black , like “homie , ” “bro , ” and “my man . ” dee draws the line when frank says he’s also going to say the n - word , which frank laments because “it’s probably the only chance i’ve got to say it . ”
pat returns home just after 2 in the morning . it’s presumed that she realized seymour may have been the plumber from earlier in the day , but all pat
* * 3 . 5 stars * * it’s always the husband is a hybrid of domestic drama , family saga and a hint of psychological thriller featuring 3 friends all of whom are randomly horrible . seriously . each in their own way horribly entitled and whiny . still they were utterly compelling . this is a story about people getting exactly what is coming to them – i enjoyed it thoroughly on that level and was rather nastily gleeful when a certain death happened . i found it to be a page turner especially from the half way m
jan swafford ' s music has been played around the country and abroad by ensembles including the symphonies of st . louis , indianapolis , and the dutch radio ; boston ' s new - music groups musica viva , collage , and dinosaur annex ; and chamber ensembles including the peabody trio , the chamber orchestra of tennessee , and the scott chamber players of indianapolis .
a clear sky . low 64f . winds s at 5 to 10 mph .
swafford ' s is a thoughtful and sympathetic telling of ives ' s life…thoroughly researched and fun to read…what makes this book so valuable is swafford ' s skill in weaving the strands of all these areas of knowledge into a cohesive fabric . it is as close as we may come for quite some time to a complete ives .
the gang dances their way to the wiz at 11th and market for the final exterior shot of the episode , which features a philly electronics store dressed up as it ' s always sunny ’s the wiz . the store , however , is closed , and the group pleads with a man to fix their vcr , to which he responds by calling the police . with that , charlie believes he has learned the lesson the group must learn to turn white once again .
now why is this not a huge problem with the app ? the thing is it seems to be what millions of people want . people enjoy the gameplay aspect of duolingo so much that its user base grows every single day . and there’s no arguing with the masses . maybe the gamification aspect is an ineffective gimmick , but it does make language learning accessible . i would argue that it doesn’t make it more fun , but if a label says “game” on it , you’re just more likely to try .
here is the thing : i don’t love duolingo . in fact , i don’t get it . i want to enjoy using this little app . i want to be part of the club of people who sit in a doctor’s waiting room levelling up their vocab , but somehow i just don’t get it . in today’s post , i’m going to try and give you some insight into what it is that is making duolingo so unattractive to me . and by unattractive , i don’t just mean that i personally don’t want to use it . it’s that i actively stay away from recommending it to people as their first language learning contact . when someone asks me how they can get started learning a new language , i don’t want them to start with the duolingo app . why ?
jameel jaffer , director of the aclu ' s center for democracy , that it was astonishing the nsa would even ask technology companies to grant direct access to user data .
watch the wild moon of rancho cucamonga , a radio - style play by joshua fagin , in which jan ' s readings of excerpts from his beethoven biography are interwoven with a story of two prickly old friends . also involved are excerpts from beethoven recordings by andrew rangell that helped inspire the play .
an aside : in 1969 , as part of a serendipitous crosscountry trip , jan swafford and jan gippo ( later piccolo with the st . louis symphony and swafford publisher ) stood on a cliff in the middle of grand canyon at sunset , arguing about whether the scene in front of them was best expressed by ives ' s fourth ( swafford ) or brahms ' s fourth ( gippo ) . the idea that swafford would eventually write biographies of both those composers would have been incomprehensible to them both . the canyon trek was the beginning of a lifetime of hiking for reasons more inspirational than athletic .
we’re slowly leaving that world dominated by business consultants and financial markets , in which it was so important to focus on one’s core business . on the contrary , the new conglomerates prove that it has become critical to diversify business models for at least three reasons :
michele campbell is a graduate of harvard college and stanford law school and a former federal prosecutor in new york city who specialized in international narcotics and gang cases . a while back , she said goodbye to her big - city legal career and moved with her husband and two children to an idyllic new england college town a lot like belle river in it’s always the husband . since then , she has spen
if all the world ' s a stage , we ' re the programme notes .
laurence olivier immortalised the moody figure of maxim in alfred hitchcock’s oscar - winning 1940 film . “mum loved it . she thought it was great . ” olivier had originally wanted to play opposite vivien leigh , “but it would be ridiculous because if vivien leigh played the second mrs de winter , she’d have fired mrs danvers on the first morning , ” chuckles browning . instead , joan fontaine excelled as the naïve innocent caught in mrs danvers’s sights .
it also opens the possibility of communications made entirely within the us being collected without warrants .
thanks to jordan hanley and st . martin’s press for the free , electronic arc of this novel received in exchange for an honest review . “it’s always the husband” is the newest novel by author michele campbell . the novel tells the story of aubrey , jenny and kate - three roommates at a prestigious east side college who are very different and yet quickly develop a tight , intense friendship . twenty years later , when kate falls from a bridge , rumors spread throughout the small town that she killed hersel
aubrey , kate , and jenny meet at prestigious carlisle college in new hampshire . aubrey is a poor scholarship kid who is desperate for approval . jenny is a self - righteous overachiever who is always cleaning up everyone’s messes . kate is a charismatic new yorker who draws aubrey and jenny into her web . the three become “bff , ” but they are more like frenemies than true friends . the trio takes part in a scandalous event their freshmen year that binds them together for life . fast - forward 20 years later , and their secret leads to murder . it’s always the husband just didn’t work for me . i feel like this book has potential—i like the premise , but something is lacking –i’m not sure if it is the unlikeable underdeveloped characters , the uneven plotting , or the slow pace , but i couldn’t embrace this book .
i kind of regret killing alanna ubach’s character roxie in season seven . she was just so funny , and it was such a funny character . i know the fans responded to her too , but just from our perspective there’s a part of me that wishes we hadn’t killed her . i’m sure we could discover that she’s alive , and it wouldn’t be that far outside the realm of possibility . there’s also a lot of times i actually regret killing dennis and dee’s mom in season two , because that was a really funny character . and i find the longer we go on , the more we have a desire to do at least a few episodes here and there that feel grounded in the emotional reality of the characters , and when you want to do that it’s nice to have family members to draw on .
ah , the curse of consumer markets . consumers are merciless , ready to deprive a company of its profit , even to force it into bankruptcy , if it’s the only way for them to obtain lower prices . this was not obvious before the advent of the internet , because
it was an episode where the gang turns black , basically . and we sort of had this idea that it would kind of be a wizard of oz thing , and we realized that had been done a number of times in the past – a lot of sitcoms have done wizard of oz - type episodes . but we’ve always done our own version of sitcom tropes in the past , so we weren’t totally put out by that . it occurred to us that maybe it should be a musical , but we didn’t do that , we wrote the episode at first as a straight episode , and we realized that a lot of the subject matter in that episode in particular was difficult – we’re essentially tackling the idea of what it’s like to be black in america . but we also recognize that we’re three white dudes , and it’s a little sketchy to have an opinion about what it’s like to be black in america when you’re just a bunch of white guys . although we do have black writers , the show is still ultimately our show , and the characters are all white . so we knew there had to be some kind of an angle – this would be a lot more fun , and a lot more digestible , if we turned it into a musical .
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why , then , are consumer companies so dominant in the digital economy ? the reason is that it is so difficult to scale up operations selling to business customers . as written in a previous issue , “enterprise markets may be a trap : fedex sells to companies because it’s expensive ( no ordinary individual can pay for it on a regular basis ) ; and it’s expensive because its scalability is limited by the absence of user participation on an enterprise market . ” this is why there are very few giant , fast - growing tech companies that are 100 % old - style enterprise when it comes to selling : palantir technologies comes to mind as a rare exception .
jan swafford began writing music as a teenager in chattanooga , tennessee . he was then a trombone player aspiring to become a high school band director , which as he then understood it was the pinnacle of a musical career . by the time he left for harvard in 1964 , he was determined instead to be a composer—an endeavor he had little knowledge of beyond the desire to pursue it . at his high school graduation he conducted his wind ensemble piece the class of ' 64 , a work recalling bits of pomp and circumstance , walton ' s crown imperial , and random other band pieces . it was declared
promising .
so after wwii the response of music and the other arts to the postwar zeitgeist was inevitably varied and contradictory . as always , some of the leading ideas came from europe , especially since some of the most influential european artists were now working in the u . s . partly inspired by their presence , schoenberg and stravinsky each had legions of american disciples .
written and performed by daniel kitson ; designed by susannah henry and mr . kitson ; technical director , jon meggat ; lighting by rob pell - walpole and mr . kitson . presented by st . ann’s warehouse , susan feldman , artistic director . at st . ann’s warehouse , 38 water street , dumbo , brooklyn ; ( 718 ) 254 - 8779 ; urltoken . through jan . 29 . running time : 1 hour 30 minutes .
amazon accounts for half of all sales growth in u . s . e - commerce , meaning
named a 1998 notable book in the ny times book review ; a critic’s choice , 2000 .
in typical body - switching move form , though , it turns out the episode wasn’t entirely made up . as old black man passes by a mirror in the apartment , scott bakula’s reflection appears .
a large part of amazon’s history could have been predicted by those who already studied wal - mart . like wal - mart , it is an uncommon company that achieves superior performances and creates a lot of value for both its stakeholders and the economy as a whole . but like wal - mart , it inspires more and more doubts as to the real amount of good that it does for society .
,
a pleasant update of the 1937 movie of the same name which starred cary grant and constance bennett and produced two sequels , 1939 ' s
topper takes a trip
with bennett returning and 1941 ' s
topper returns ,
with joan blondell playing bennett ' s role .
i cannot tell you how much i dislike the computer voice . it doesn’t intone , it doesn’t emote , it’s just blank . a blank canvas of words coming at me . who learns a language for that ? languages are about people . i wish they’d play and work with snippets from media shows or real people’s recordings . just think of the big efforts audio lingua and rhinospike are making in this area , and you can see that automated heartless computer voices really don’t need to be used in automated language instruction .
( not live ) : recommended reading and updates on our various collections of the maclean ' s archives ; everything maclean ' s has ever published—more than 3 , 400 issues and 100 , 000 articles .
‘i don’t think the show would work if it were truly hateful . ’ photograph : patrick mcelhenney / fxx
when the nsa reviews a communication it believes merits further investigation , it issues what it calls a
report
. according to the nsa ,
over 2 , 000 prism - based reports
are now issued every month . there were 24 , 005 in 2012 , a 27 % increase on the previous year .
your iphone is now encrypted . the fbi says it ' ll help kidnappers . who do you believe ?
this new always sunny musical looks even wilder than the strangely brilliant “ nightman cometh , ” the series’ first stab at a song - and - dance episode . the surreal premise , in a nutshell : the all - white gang has turned black , first indicated when they see “themselves” reflected in a mirror . ( each character’s doppelganger is played by an actor of color , although the show has actually explored blackface before . ) and it sounds as if it’s not shying away from the politics of the scenario : “when you’ve just turned black , and you can’t switch back , ” goes one verse sung by dennis ( glenn howerton ) , “well you gotta go and find out the rules . ”
the words it ' s always the husband carry a certain implication that any time a woman is murdered , her husband is the first suspect . that ' s how i thought this book would go , before i started reading it . but it was 6 hours into a 10 . 5 hour book before there was even any mention of husbands or marriages or murders . that ' s a heck of a long time to get to the point and required some patience . up to then , it ' s about three female college roommates and their antics . kate the rich spoiled bad girl , jenny the townie & good girl , and aubrey the poor naive one who idolizes and follows kate like a lapdog . some years later , their relationships have changed quite a bit although they still consider themselves tied to each other because of a major tragedy that occurred in college . i must say that kate was a detestable character . how the other two put up with her is hard to fathom . the pace picks up a lot in the second half , and the ending felt somewhat rushed . the author actually gives us several suspects to ponder . the murderer ' s identity may come as a surprise , and then again , maybe not .