Writing prompt: My Spring Festival

Student essay:
Not long ago,Spring Festival,on which we get together and have a good time,arrived in everybody's expectations.
As known to us all,Spring Festival plays the most important part in Chinese festival culture.It's the time for people who are away from home to come back to their parents,as well as the time for people who have been in the state of tension to relax themselves.
As a traditional Chinese festival,Spring Festival stands for the long history of our culture,which our Chinese are always proud of.The following descriptions are about my Spring Festival.
In order to make the last day of this year perfect,the CCTV perform a celebration for the Chinese people all around the world.As for me,it's the best time of a year during the performances,because the TV can not only make us laugh,but also give a chance for everybody to take their mind off their problems that have troubled them a lot in the past year.How a meaningful day that New Year's Eve is!
Shooting off fireworks is such a beautiful activity that everybody is want to set off one with his own hands.It is such an inspiring sight that all the pedestrian,both the old and the young,can't stop raising their heads to watch for a while,
It is so amazing that it leaves everyone feeling intoxicated.
As the beginning of the completely new year,Lunar New Year's Day is the the most appropriate time for the relatives who have been long time no see to call on each other.Being polite to my aunt and uncle,I say"Happy New Year and wish your daughter good grades."so as to please them,as a result of this,I'm likely to get a 'hongbao' to gain good luck.
After being on a visit to the relations,we come back to our warm house,dreaming about the new year.
We ring out the Old Year and ring in the New Year!

Corrected essay:
Not long ago, Spring Festival, on which we get together and have a good time, arrived to everybody's expectations.
As known to us all, the Spring Festival plays the most important part in Chinese festival culture. It's the time for people who are away from home to come back to their parents, as well as the time for people who have been in a state of tension to relax.
As a traditional Chinese festival, Spring Festival stands for the long history of our culture, which we Chinese are always proud of. The following descriptions are about my Spring Festival.
In order to make the last day of this year perfect, the CCTV performs a celebration for the Chinese people all around the world. As for me, it's the best time of a year during the performances, because the TV can not only make us laugh, but also give a chance for everybody to take their mind off their problems that have troubled them a lot in the past year. What a meaningful day New Year's Eve is!
Shooting off fireworks is such a beautiful activity that everybody wants to set off one with their own hands. It is such an inspiring sight that all the pedestrians, both the old and the young, can't stop raising their heads to watch for a while.
It is so amazing that it leaves everyone feeling intoxicated.
As the beginning of the completely new year, Lunar New Year's Day is the most appropriate time for the relatives who have not seen each other for a long time to call on each other. Being polite to my aunt and uncle, I say, "Happy New Year and wish your daughter good grades," so as to please them. As a result of this, I'm likely to get a 'hongbao' to gain good luck.
After visiting the relatives, we come back to our warm house, dreaming about the new year.
We ring out the Old Year and ring in the New Year!

Error analysis:
error_sentence: Not long ago,Spring Festival,on which we get together and have a good time,arrived in everybody's expectations.

correct_sentence: Not long ago, Spring Festival, on which we get together and have a good time, arrived to everybody's expectations.

error: in
correction: to
error_type: Preposition Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Preposition Error: The preposition 〈in〉 is used incorrectly to express 'meeting expectations'; the correct collocation should be 『arrived to』, therefore 〈in〉 is changed to 『to』 to conform to the fixed expression 'arrive to expectations'.
error_sentence: As known to us all,Spring Festival plays the most important part in Chinese festival culture.
correct_sentence: As known to us all, the Spring Festival plays the most important part in Chinese festival culture.
correction: the
error_type: Determiner Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Determiner Error: The specific festival name 〈Spring Festival〉 requires the definite article 『the』 before it to clearly refer to the traditional Chinese Spring Festival, therefore 『the』 is added to make the sentence more standard.
error_sentence: It's the time for people who are away from home to come back to their parents,as well as the time for people who have been in the state of tension to relax themselves.

correct_sentence: It's the time for people who are away from home to come back to their parents, as well as the time for people who have been in a state of tension to relax.

error: the
correction: a
error_type: Determiner Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Determiner Error: The definite article 〈the〉 in the phrase 〈in the state of tension〉 indicates specificity, but here it should be a general reference to 'a state of tension', therefore 〈the〉 is changed to 『a』 to comply with grammatical rules.
error_sentence: It's the time for people who are away from home to come back to their parents,as well as the time for people who have been in the state of tension to relax themselves.

correct_sentence: It's the time for people who are away from home to come back to their parents, as well as the time for people who have been in a state of tension to relax.

error: themselves
error_type: Word Redundancy Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Word Redundancy Error: The verb 〈relax〉 itself already includes the meaning of 'self-relaxation', so there is no need to add a reflexive pronoun; therefore, 〈themselves〉 is deleted to make the sentence more concise.
error_sentence: As a traditional Chinese festival,Spring Festival stands for the long history of our culture,which our Chinese are always proud of.
correct_sentence: As a traditional Chinese festival, Spring Festival stands for the long history of our culture, which we Chinese are always proud of.
error: our
correction: we
error_type: Pronoun Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Pronoun Error: The subject of the clause needs to be consistent with the subject of the main sentence; in the original sentence 〈our Chinese〉, the possessive pronoun 〈our〉 conflicts with the subject 『we』, therefore 〈our〉 is changed to 『we』 to comply with grammatical rules.
error_sentence: In order to make the last day of this year perfect,the CCTV perform a celebration for the Chinese people all around the world.
correct_sentence: In order to make the last day of this year perfect, the CCTV performs a celebration for the Chinese people all around the world.
error: perform
correction: performs
error_type: Subject-Verb Agreement Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Subject-Verb Agreement Error: The subject 〈CCTV〉 is third-person singular and requires the third-person singular form of the verb, therefore 〈perform〉 is changed to 『performs』 to comply with subject-verb agreement rules.
error_sentence: How a meaningful day that New Year's Eve is!
Shooting off fireworks is such a beautiful activity that everybody is want to set off one with his own hands.
correct_sentence: What a meaningful day New Year's Eve is!

error: How
correction: What
error_type: Conjunction Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Conjunction Error: According to English grammar rules, 〈How〉 modifies adjectives or adverbs, whereas here the structure 'What + a + noun' is required, therefore 〈How〉 is changed to 『What』.
error_sentence: How a meaningful day that New Year's Eve is!
Shooting off fireworks is such a beautiful activity that everybody is want to set off one with his own hands.
correct_sentence: What a meaningful day New Year's Eve is!

error: that
error_type: Word Redundancy Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Word Redundancy Error: In the exclamatory sentence 『What a meaningful day New Year's Eve is!』, 〈that〉 is redundant, therefore 〈that〉 is deleted to avoid structural confusion.
error_sentence: How a meaningful day that New Year's Eve is!
Shooting off fireworks is such a beautiful activity that everybody is want to set off one with his own hands.
correct_sentence: Shooting off fireworks is such a beautiful activity that everybody wants to set off one with their own hands.
error: is want
correction: wants
error_type: Auxiliary Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Auxiliary Error: 〈is〉 conflicts grammatically with the main verb 〈want〉, forming a double predicate error, therefore 〈is want〉 is changed to 『wants』 to comply with the third-person singular subject-verb agreement rule.
error_sentence: How a meaningful day that New Year's Eve is!
Shooting off fireworks is such a beautiful activity that everybody is want to set off one with his own hands.
correct_sentence: Shooting off fireworks is such a beautiful activity that everybody wants to set off one with their own hands.
error: his
correction: their
error_type: Pronoun Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Pronoun Error: The indefinite pronoun 〈everybody〉 is singular but gender-neutral, requiring the plural possessive pronoun 『their』 to avoid gender assumption, therefore 〈his〉 is changed to 『their』.
error_sentence: It is such an inspiring sight that all the pedestrian,both the old and the young,can't stop raising their heads to watch for a while,
It is so amazing that it leaves everyone feeling intoxicated.

correct_sentence: It is such an inspiring sight that all the pedestrians, both the old and the young, can't stop raising their heads to watch for a while.

error: pedestrian
correction: pedestrians
error_type: Noun Number Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Noun Number Error: According to English grammar rules, 〈all the〉 must be followed by a plural noun, therefore 〈pedestrian〉 is changed to 『pedestrians』 to match the plural meaning of 〈all〉.
error_sentence: It is such an inspiring sight that all the pedestrian,both the old and the young,can't stop raising their heads to watch for a while,
It is so amazing that it leaves everyone feeling intoxicated.

correct_sentence: It is such an inspiring sight that all the pedestrians, both the old and the young, can't stop raising their heads to watch for a while.

error: can't
correction: can't
error_type: Other Error
error_description: Other Error: No substantive modification here, possibly an input error.
error_sentence: It is such an inspiring sight that all the pedestrian,both the old and the young,can't stop raising their heads to watch for a while,
It is so amazing that it leaves everyone feeling intoxicated.

correct_sentence: It is such an inspiring sight that all the pedestrians, both the old and the young, can't stop raising their heads to watch for a while.

error: ,
correction: .
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Punctuation Error: 〈It is such an inspiring sight that all the pedestrian,both the old and the young,can't stop raising their heads to watch for a while〉 and 〈It is so amazing that it leaves everyone feeling intoxicated〉 contain independent subject-verb structures and can be independent sentences, therefore 〈,〉 is changed to 『.』.
error_sentence: As the beginning of the completely new year,Lunar New Year's Day is the the most appropriate time for the relatives who have been long time no see to call on each other.
correct_sentence: As the beginning of the completely new year, Lunar New Year's Day is the most appropriate time for the relatives who have not seen each other for a long time to call on each other.
error: the
error_type: Word Redundancy Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Word Redundancy Error: The superlative already has the definite article 〈the〉 before it; in 〈the the〉, the definite article 〈the〉 is used redundantly, therefore the extra 〈the〉 is deleted to avoid redundancy.
error_sentence: As the beginning of the completely new year,Lunar New Year's Day is the the most appropriate time for the relatives who have been long time no see to call on each other.
correct_sentence: As the beginning of the completely new year, Lunar New Year's Day is the most appropriate time for the relatives who have not seen each other for a long time to call on each other.
error: been
correction: not seen each other for a
error_type: Sentence Structure Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Sentence Structure Error: The original sentence structure 〈have been long time no see〉 is confusing and does not conform to English grammar; it needs to be reconstructed as 『have not seen each other for a long time』 to conform to English expression, therefore 〈been〉 is changed to 『not seen each other for a』 to express the correct meaning.
error_sentence: As the beginning of the completely new year,Lunar New Year's Day is the the most appropriate time for the relatives who have been long time no see to call on each other.
correct_sentence: As the beginning of the completely new year, Lunar New Year's Day is the most appropriate time for the relatives who have not seen each other for a long time to call on each other.
error: no see
error_type: Word Redundancy Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Word Redundancy Error: The phrase 〈no see〉 does not conform to English grammar and needs to be deleted to form a correct expression.
error_sentence: Being polite to my aunt and uncle,I say"Happy New Year and wish your daughter good grades.
correct_sentence: Being polite to my aunt and uncle, I say, "Happy New Year and wish your daughter good grades," so as to please them.
error: say"Happy
correction: say, "Happy
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: ① Punctuation Error: A comma is needed before direct speech, therefore a 『,』 is added after 〈say〉 to comply with punctuation rules; ② Space Error: According to English writing conventions, words must be separated by spaces; in this sentence, 〈say〉 and 〈Happy〉 are two separate words and need to be separated by a space, therefore 〈say"Happy〉 is changed to 『say, "Happy』 to conform to conventions.
error_sentence: Being polite to my aunt and uncle,I say"Happy New Year and wish your daughter good grades. "so as to please them,as a result of this,I'm likely to get a 'hongbao' to gain good luck.

correct_sentence: Being polite to my aunt and uncle, I say, "Happy New Year and wish your daughter good grades," so as to please them.
error: ."so
correction: ," so
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: ① Punctuation Error: According to English writing conventions, the end of direct speech needs a comma to connect to the main clause, therefore 〈."so〉 is changed to 『," so』 to correctly connect sentence components; ② Space Error: According to English writing conventions, a space should be used between two sentences, therefore a space should be added between the punctuation mark and 〈so〉.
error_sentence: "so as to please them,as a result of this,I'm likely to get a 'hongbao' to gain good luck.

correct_sentence: Being polite to my aunt and uncle, I say, "Happy New Year and wish your daughter good grades," so as to please them. As a result of this, I'm likely to get a 'hongbao' to gain good luck.

error: ,as
correction: . As
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: ① Punctuation Error: 『Being polite to my aunt and uncle, I say, "Happy New Year and wish your daughter good grades," so as to please them』 and 『As a result of this, I'm likely to get a 'hongbao' to gain good luck』 contain independent subject-verb structures and can be independent sentences, therefore 〈,as〉 is changed to 『. As』 to comply with writing conventions; ② Space Error: According to English writing conventions, a space should be used between two sentences, therefore a space should be added between the punctuation mark and 『As』.
error_sentence: "so as to please them,as a result of this,I'm likely to get a 'hongbao' to gain good luck.

correct_sentence: As a result of this, I'm likely to get a 'hongbao' to gain good luck.

error: I'm
correction: I'm
error_type: Other Error
error_description: Other Error: No substantive modification here, possibly an input error.
error_sentence: After being on a visit to the relations,we come back to our warm house,dreaming about the new year.

correct_sentence: After visiting the relatives, we come back to our warm house, dreaming about the new year.

error: being on a visit to the relations
correction: visiting the relatives
error_type: Verb Choice Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Verb Choice Error: The structure 〈being on a visit to〉 is cumbersome and unnatural; 『visiting』 should be used here to mean 'to visit', therefore 〈being on a visit to〉 is changed to 『visiting』 to make the expression more concise; ② Noun Error: In everyday English, 『relatives』 is more commonly used to refer to family members or kin, while 〈relations〉 is usually used in more formal or abstract contexts to mean 'relationships', therefore 〈relations〉 is changed to 『relatives』 to make the meaning clearer.