Writing prompt: I Would Like Students Have More Chance to Choose

Student essay:
Our college entrance examination will be changed in 2 years,especially for English exam.In my opinion,this change is good for students.We can only have one examination now,and it means that we have only one chance to choose our college.In China,college entrance examination is one of the most important opportunities to change a people's life.
So,now a new policy will be carried out that students can choose the time and the times.It's really good news for students.English is our second language,but we spend too much time on it.If we can define it as a skills,we may not concentrate on grade.By the way,if we fail one examination we can try again,so we can do our best to learn it.
I think the chance of the examination will be welcomed for students.

Corrected essay:
Our college entrance examination will be changed in 2 years, especially for the English exam. In my opinion, this change is good for students. We can only have one examination now, and it means that we have only one chance to choose our college. In China, the college entrance examination is one of the most important opportunities to change a person's life.
So, now a new policy will be carried out that students can choose the time and the times. It's really good news for students. English is our second language, but we spend too much time on it. If we can define it as a skill, we may not concentrate on grades. By the way, if we fail one examination, we can try again, so we can do our best to learn it.
I think the chance of the examination will be welcomed by students.

Error analysis:
error_sentence: Our college entrance examination will be changed in 2 years,especially for English exam.
correct_sentence: Our college entrance examination will be changed in 2 years, especially for the English exam.
correction: the
error_type: Determiner Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Determiner Error: 〈English exam〉 refers to a specific exam and needs to be modified by the definite article 『the』, so 『the』 is added before 〈English〉 to conform to English grammar rules.
error_sentence: In China,college entrance examination is one of the most important opportunities to change a people's life.

correct_sentence: In China, the college entrance examination is one of the most important opportunities to change a person's life.

correction: the
error_type: Determiner Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Determiner Error: 〈college entrance examination〉 refers to a specific exam and needs to be modified by the definite article 『the』, so 『the』 is added before 〈college〉 to conform to English grammar rules.
error_sentence: In China,college entrance examination is one of the most important opportunities to change a people's life.

correct_sentence: In China, the college entrance examination is one of the most important opportunities to change a person's life.

error: people
correction: person
error_type: Noun Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Noun Error: In 〈a people's life〉, 〈people〉 is plural, which contradicts the singular indefinite article 〈a〉; therefore, 〈people〉 is changed to 『person』 to correctly express 'a person's life'.
error_sentence: If we can define it as a skills,we may not concentrate on grade.
correct_sentence: If we can define it as a skill, we may not concentrate on grades.
error: skills
correction: skill
error_type: Noun Number Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Noun Number Error: The indefinite article 〈a〉 should be followed by a singular noun, so 〈skills〉 is changed to 『skill』 to conform to grammatical rules.
error_sentence: If we can define it as a skills,we may not concentrate on grade.
correct_sentence: If we can define it as a skill, we may not concentrate on grades.
error: grade
correction: grades
error_type: Noun Number Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Noun Number Error: 〈grade〉 in this context should be in the plural form 『grades』, indicating 'multiple scores', so 〈grade〉 is changed to 『grades』 to fit the meaning.
error_sentence: By the way,if we fail one examination we can try again,so we can do our best to learn it.

correct_sentence: By the way, if we fail one examination, we can try again, so we can do our best to learn it.

correction: ,
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Punctuation Error: 〈if we fail one examination〉 is an adverbial clause and needs a comma 『,』 after it to separate it from the main clause, so a comma 『,』 is added after 〈examination〉 to conform to English punctuation rules.
error_sentence: I think the chance of the examination will be welcomed for students.
correct_sentence: I think the chance of the examination will be welcomed by students.
error: for
correction: by
error_type: Preposition Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Preposition Error: In the passive voice, the agent of the action should be indicated by the preposition 『by』, so 〈for〉 is changed to 『by』 to conform to grammatical rules.