Writing prompt: A Request of Mine

Student essay:
Dear Mr.Brown,
I'm L,an exchange student who accommodates at your home.I'm sorry to teii you a truth that i left my English dictionary.I hope that you could help me to send my dictionary back.
As far as I'm concerned,this is an important dictionary which is of great significance.It is a value dictionary which was a gift from my English teacher.She is a kind woman who comes from America.At the same time,when I came to America,she provided lots of help to me.when I had to come home,she send me a dictionary to encourage me to work hard.I'm appreciate it that she did me a favour.
I left my dictionary at my bookshelf in my bedroom.I could provided postage by myself.
Yours, L

Corrected essay:
Dear Mr. Brown,
I'm L, an exchange student who is accommodated at your home. I'm sorry to tell you the truth that I left my English dictionary. I hope that you can help me to send my dictionary back.
As far as I'm concerned, this is an important dictionary which is of great significance. It is a valuable dictionary which was a gift from my English teacher. She is a kind woman who comes from America. At the same time, when I came to America, she provided lots of help to me. When I had to come home, she sent me a dictionary to encourage me to work hard. I appreciate it in that she did me a favour.
I left my dictionary on the bookshelf in my bedroom. I could pay the postage by myself.
Yours, L

Error analysis:
error_sentence: Dear Mr.Brown,
I'm L,an exchange student who accommodates at your home.
correct_sentence: Dear Mr. Brown,
I'm L, an exchange student who is accommodated at your home.
error: accommodates
correction: is accommodated
error_type: Verb Voice Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Verb Voice Error: According to the context, the subject is the recipient of the action, requiring the passive voice. The verb 〈accommodates〉 is in the active voice, but here it should be changed to the passive voice 『is accommodated』 to correctly express the meaning that 'the student is arranged accommodation', conforming to grammatical rules.
error_sentence: I'm sorry to teii you a truth that i left my English dictionary.
correct_sentence: I'm sorry to tell you the truth that I left my English dictionary.
error: teii you a
correction: tell you the
error_type: Determiner Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Spelling Error: According to English spelling rules, 〈teii〉 is misspelled; the correct form should be 『tell』, conforming to the base verb structure and expressing the meaning 'to inform'; ② Determiner Error: The fixed phrase 『tell the truth』 requires the definite article 〈the〉 instead of the indefinite article 〈a〉, so 〈a〉 is changed to 『the』 to conform to English idiomatic expression.
error_sentence: I'm sorry to teii you a truth that i left my English dictionary.
correct_sentence: I'm sorry to tell you the truth that I left my English dictionary.
error: i
correction: I
error_type: Case Error
error_severity: 1
error_description: Case Error: According to English writing conventions, the pronoun 〈i〉 should be capitalized when it is at the beginning of a sentence; therefore, it is changed to 『I』 to ensure the sentence structure is correct.
error_sentence: I hope that you could help me to send my dictionary back.

correct_sentence: I hope that you can help me to send my dictionary back.

error: could
correction: can
error_type: Auxiliary Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Auxiliary Error: According to the sentence's meaning, this expresses a current request rather than a past possibility; the auxiliary verb 〈could〉 should be changed to 『can』 to make the tone more appropriate to the context.
error_sentence: It is a value dictionary which was a gift from my English teacher.
correct_sentence: It is a valuable dictionary which was a gift from my English teacher.
error: value
correction: valuable
error_type: PoS Confusion Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: PoS Confusion Error: According to the sentence's meaning, an adjective is needed here to modify the noun 〈dictionary〉, but 〈value〉 is a noun; it should be changed to the adjective 『valuable』 to make the collocation correct (a valuable dictionary).
error_sentence: At the same time,when I came to America,she provided lots of help to me.when I had to come home,she send me a dictionary to encourage me to work hard.
correct_sentence: At the same time, when I came to America, she provided lots of help to me. When I had to come home, she sent me a dictionary to encourage me to work hard.
error: me.when
correction: me. When
error_type: Space Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: ① Space Error: According to English writing conventions, a space is required after a period before starting a new sentence. The original phrase 〈me.when〉 lacks a space and should be changed to 『me. When』 to ensure correct formatting. ② Case Error: According to English writing conventions, 〈when〉, as the beginning of a new sentence, should have its first letter capitalized; therefore, it is changed to 『When』 to conform to English grammatical rules.
error_sentence: At the same time,when I came to America,she provided lots of help to me.when I had to come home,she send me a dictionary to encourage me to work hard.
correct_sentence: When I had to come home, she sent me a dictionary to encourage me to work hard.
error: send
correction: sent
error_type: Verb Tense Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Verb Tense Error: According to the context, the action occurred in the past; the verb 〈send〉 should use the past tense 『sent』, therefore it is changed to 『sent』 to maintain tense consistency.
error_sentence: I'm appreciate it that she did me a favour.

correct_sentence: I appreciate it in that she did me a favour.

error: I'm
correction: I
error_type: Verb Choice Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Verb Choice Error: According to English expression norms, 〈I'm〉 is a contraction of 『I am』, but a subject-verb structure is needed here to express the complete meaning; therefore, it is changed to 『I appreciate』 to make the sentence more natural.
error_sentence: I'm appreciate it that she did me a favour.

correct_sentence: I appreciate it in that she did me a favour.

correction: in
error_type: Preposition Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Preposition Error: According to the sentence's meaning, 『in』 is needed here to express the causal relationship in 『appreciate it in that she did me a favour.』; therefore, 『in』 should be added after 〈appreciate it〉 to make the logic clearer.
error_sentence: I left my dictionary at my bookshelf in my bedroom.
correct_sentence: I left my dictionary on the bookshelf in my bedroom.
error: at my
correction: on the
error_type: Preposition Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Preposition Error: According to English expression norms, when indicating an object is on a surface, 『on the bookshelf』 should be used instead of 〈at the bookshelf〉; therefore, 〈at〉 is changed to 『on』 to conform to English idiomatic expression; ② Determiner Error: According to determiner usage rules, 『the bookshelf』 already specifically refers to the bookshelf in the context, so the possessive pronoun 〈my〉 is not needed; therefore, 〈my〉 is deleted to ensure conciseness.
error_sentence: I could provided postage by myself.

correct_sentence: I could pay the postage by myself.

error: provided
correction: pay the
error_type: Verb Choice Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Verb Choice Error: 〈provided〉, expressing 'to offer', does not fit the context; here, 『pay the』, expressing 'to make payment for', should be used to convey the bearing of postage costs; therefore, 〈provided〉 is changed to 『pay the』 to accurately express the sentence's meaning.