Writing prompt: My Weekend

Student essay:
Dear Lucy,
I'm L.I plan to accompany old people in the Double Ninth Festival with classmates,at weekends.We prepared many wonderful exercises the old people like.If we were to sing and song, they would happy.And in the afternoon,we will make dumpling for old people.In conclusion,that's the first time that we have gone to the nursing house.So I want to invite you to join us,as give us better guide. would you like?Time on Saturday,8:00am to 4:00pm.Looking forward to your reply.
Yours, L

Corrected essay:
Dear Lucy,
I'm L. I plan to accompany old people in the Double Ninth Festival with my classmates at the weekend. We have prepared many wonderful activities the old people like. If we sing a song, they will be happy. And in the afternoon, we will make dumplings for the old people. In conclusion, this is the first time that we are going to the nursing house. So I want to invite you to join us and give us better guidance. Would you like to come? The time is Saturday, from 8:00 am to 4:00 pm. Looking forward to your reply.
Yours, L

Error analysis:
error_sentence: Dear Lucy,
I'm L.I plan to accompany old people in the Double Ninth Festival with classmates,at weekends.
correct_sentence: Dear Lucy,
I'm L. I plan to accompany old people in the Double Ninth Festival with my classmates at the weekend.
error: L.I
correction: L. I
error_severity: 2
error_description: Space Error: According to English writing conventions, there should be a space between punctuation and a word; the original sentence lacks a space in 〈L.I〉, so 〈L.I〉 needs to be changed to 『L. I』 to conform to writing conventions.
error_sentence: Dear Lucy,
I'm L.I plan to accompany old people in the Double Ninth Festival with classmates,at weekends.
correct_sentence: I plan to accompany old people in the Double Ninth Festival with my classmates at the weekend.
error: classmates,at weekends
correction: my classmates at the weekend
error_type: Determiner Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Determiner Error: According to English grammar rules, the original sentence 〈classmates,〉 lacks a necessary determiner to specify the object, so 〈classmates,〉 is changed to add 『my classmates』 to clarify the possessive relationship; ② Determiner Error: According to English idiomatic expression, the definite article 『the』 indicates specificity; phrases referring to specific time periods like 『weekend』 usually require the article 『the』 to clearly refer to a specific holiday, so 〈weekends〉 in the sentence is changed to 『the weekend』 to conform to English idiomatic expression.
error_sentence: We prepared many wonderful exercises the old people like.
correct_sentence: We have prepared many wonderful activities the old people like.
correction: have
error_type: Verb Tense Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Verb Tense Error: According to the context, the sentence needs to use the present perfect tense to emphasize the completed action of preparation, while 〈prepared〉 in the original sentence is in the simple past tense; therefore, 〈prepared〉 needs to be changed to the present perfect tense 『have prepared』 to fit the context.
error_sentence: We prepared many wonderful exercises the old people like.
correct_sentence: We have prepared many wonderful activities the old people like.
error: exercises
correction: activities
error_type: Noun Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Noun Error: According to the context, the meaning here is 'activities'; 〈exercises〉 means 'physical training', which does not fit the context, so 〈exercises〉 needs to be changed to 『activities』 to fit the meaning.
error_sentence: If we were to sing and song, they would happy.
correct_sentence: If we sing a song, they will be happy.
error: were to sing and
correction: sing a
error_type: Verb Tense Error
error_severity: 5
error_description: ① Verb Tense Error: According to English expression habits, a hypothetical conditional sentence needs to use the simple present tense; the original phrase 〈were to sing〉 does not fit the context, so 〈were to sing〉 needs to be changed to 『sing a song』 to fit the expression; ② Determiner Error: According to the context, the intention here is to express 'sing a song'; the original word 〈song〉 needs the determiner 『a』 to specify the singular form of the noun. Therefore, 〈were to sing and〉 needs to be changed to 『sing a』 to fit the meaning.
error_sentence: If we were to sing and song, they would happy.
correct_sentence: If we sing a song, they will be happy.
error: would
correction: will be
error_type: Verb Tense Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Verb Tense Error: According to English grammar rules, the main clause of a conditional adverbial clause needs to use the simple future tense; the subjunctive mood 〈would〉 in the original sentence is a misuse, so 〈would〉 needs to be changed to 『will be』 to maintain tense consistency between the main and subordinate clauses.
error_sentence: And in the afternoon,we will make dumpling for old people.
correct_sentence: And in the afternoon, we will make dumplings for the old people.
error: dumpling for
correction: dumplings for the
error_type: Noun Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Noun Number Error: According to English grammar rules, 〈dumpling〉 in the original sentence should use the plural form 『dumplings』 to be consistent with the quantity in the context, so 〈dumpling〉 should be changed to 『dumplings』 to conform to English grammar rules; ② Determiner Error: According to the context, this specifically refers to elderly people, requiring the definite article 『the』 for specification, so 〈old people〉 is changed to 『the old people』 to fit the meaning.
error_sentence: In conclusion,that's the first time that we have gone to the nursing house.
correct_sentence: In conclusion, this is the first time that we are going to the nursing house.
error: that's
correction: this is
error_type: Pronoun Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Pronoun Error: According to the context, the meaning here is 'this is the first time'; the original 〈that's〉 has an unclear reference, so 〈that's〉 needs to be changed to 『this is』 to emphasize the current event and conform to contextual logic.
error_sentence: In conclusion,that's the first time that we have gone to the nursing house.
correct_sentence: In conclusion, this is the first time that we are going to the nursing house.
error: have gone
correction: are going
error_type: Verb Tense Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Verb Tense Error: According to the context, the sentence emphasizes an upcoming first visit, requiring the present continuous tense, while 〈have gone〉 in the original sentence is in the present perfect tense; therefore, 〈have gone〉 needs to be changed to the continuous tense 『are going』 to fit the context.
error_sentence: So I want to invite you to join us,as give us better guide.
correct_sentence: So I want to invite you to join us and give us better guidance.
error: ,as
correction: and
error_type: Conjunction Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: Conjunction Error: According to English grammar rules, 〈join us〉 and 〈give us guidance〉 in the original sentence, as parallel structures, need to be connected by 『and』, so 〈,as〉 needs to be changed to 『and』 to conform to English grammar rules.
error_sentence: So I want to invite you to join us,as give us better guide. would you like?Time on Saturday,8:00am to 4:00pm.
correct_sentence: So I want to invite you to join us and give us better guidance. Would you like to come? The time is Saturday, from 8:00 am to 4:00 pm.
error: guide. would you like?Time on Saturday,8:00am to 4:00pm
correction: guidance. Would you like to come? The time is Saturday, from 8:00 am to 4:00 pm
error_type: PoS Confusion Error
error_severity: 5
error_description: ① PoS Confusion Error: According to the context, the meaning here is 'guidance' and should be in noun form; the original 〈guide〉 is a verb, so 〈guide〉 needs to be changed to the uncountable noun 『guidance』 to fit the meaning; ② Case Error: According to English writing conventions, the first letter of a question sentence needs to be capitalized, so 〈would〉 needs to be changed to 『Would』 to conform to conventions; ③ Preposition Error: According to the context, the intention here is to express 'from 8:00 am to 4:00 pm'; the original sentence lacks a preposition, so the original sentence needs to be changed to 『Would you like to come? The time is Saturday, from 8:00 am to 4:00 pm』 to maintain semantic integrity and sentence fluency.