Writing prompt: My Room

Student essay:
Dear Mr.Brown,
I'm appreciate it for your hlep when i live in your home.With your help,i can study in the United States.
I'm writing the letter to find my lost English dictionary.When i came back my home,i find my English dictionary was left in your home.The dictionary is very important to me,it's my America teacher's sending,so its value can't describe in words.According to my memory,it may left on the
shelf in the bedroom.I hope you can post it to me,i'll pay the postage by myself.
To make the long story short,i'm very grateful to you for me during my study in the United States to provide help and i would appreciate it if you could post the English dictionary to me.
Yours,Li Hua

Corrected essay:
Dear Mr. Brown,
I appreciate your help when I lived in your home. With your help, I can study in the United States.
I'm writing this letter to find my lost English dictionary. When I came back to my home, I found my English dictionary was left in your home. The dictionary is very important to me. It's my American teacher's gift, so its value can't be described in words. According to my memory, it may have been left on the shelf in the bedroom. I hope you can post it to me. I'll pay the postage myself.
To make the long story short, I'm very grateful to you for providing help during my study in the United States and I would appreciate it if you could post the English dictionary to me.
Yours,
Li Hua

Error analysis:
error_sentence: Dear Mr.Brown,
I'm appreciate it for your hlep when i live in your home.
correct_sentence: Dear Mr. Brown,
I appreciate your help when I lived in your home.
error: 'm appreciate it for your hlep when i live
correction: appreciate your help when I lived
error_type: Sentence Structure Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Sentence Structure Error: The original sentence has unclear meaning and incorrect structure; considering the context, it intends to express 'thank you for your help when I lived in your home', therefore 〈'm appreciate it for your hlep when i live〉 is modified to 『appreciate your help when I lived』 to make the meaning coherent and conform to grammatical rules.
error_sentence: With your help,i can study in the United States.

correct_sentence: With your help, I can study in the United States.

error: i
correction: I
error_type: Case Error
error_severity: 1
error_description: Case Error: According to English writing conventions, 『I』 as a first-person pronoun must always be capitalized in a sentence, regardless of whether it is at the beginning or in the middle of the sentence, therefore 〈i〉 needs to be modified to 『I』 to conform to the convention.
error_sentence: I'm writing the letter to find my lost English dictionary.
correct_sentence: I'm writing this letter to find my lost English dictionary.
error: the
correction: this
error_type: Determiner Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Determiner Error: The determiner 〈the〉 has an unclear reference; 『this』 should be used to emphasize the letter currently being written, therefore 〈the〉 is changed to 『this』 to conform to grammatical rules.
error_sentence: When i came back my home,i find my English dictionary was left in your home.
correct_sentence: When I came back to my home, I found my English dictionary was left in your home.
error: i
correction: I
error_type: Case Error
error_severity: 1
error_description: Case Error: According to English writing conventions, 『I』 as a first-person pronoun must always be capitalized in a sentence, regardless of whether it is at the beginning or in the middle of the sentence, therefore 〈i〉 needs to be modified to 『I』 to conform to the convention.
error_sentence: When i came back my home,i find my English dictionary was left in your home.
correct_sentence: When I came back to my home, I found my English dictionary was left in your home.
correction: to
error_type: Preposition Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Preposition Error: The phrasal verb 〈came back〉 needs to be followed by the preposition 『to』 to indicate the destination of return, therefore 『to』 is added after 〈back〉 to conform to grammatical rules.
error_sentence: When i came back my home,i find my English dictionary was left in your home.
correct_sentence: When I came back to my home, I found my English dictionary was left in your home.
error: i find
correction: I found
error_type: Verb Tense Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: ① Case Error: According to English writing conventions, 『I』 as a first-person pronoun must always be capitalized in a sentence, regardless of whether it is at the beginning or in the middle of the sentence, therefore 〈i〉 needs to be modified to 『I』 to conform to the convention; ② Verb Tense Error: This part describes a past event, so the verb needs to be in the past tense, therefore 〈find〉 is modified to 『found』 to conform to the contextual tense.
error_sentence: The dictionary is very important to me,it's my America teacher's sending,so its value can't describe in words.
correct_sentence: The dictionary is very important to me. It's my American teacher's gift, so its value can't be described in words.
error: ,it
correction: . It
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: ① Punctuation Error: 〈The dictionary is very important to me〉 and 〈it's my America teacher's sending〉 contain independent subject-verb structures and can be independent sentences, therefore 〈,〉 is modified to 『.』 and 〈it〉 is changed to 『It』; ② Space Error: According to English writing conventions, end-of-sentence punctuation should be followed by a space before the first word of the next sentence, therefore 〈,it〉 is modified to 『. It』 to conform to the convention.
error_sentence: The dictionary is very important to me,it's my America teacher's sending,so its value can't describe in words.
correct_sentence: It's my American teacher's gift, so its value can't be described in words.
error: America
correction: American
error_type: PoS Confusion Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: PoS Confusion Error: An adjective should be used here to modify the noun 〈teacher〉, therefore 〈America〉 is modified to 『American』 to conform to grammatical rules.
error_sentence: The dictionary is very important to me,it's my America teacher's sending,so its value can't describe in words.
correct_sentence: It's my American teacher's gift, so its value can't be described in words.
error: sending
correction: gift
error_type: Noun Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Noun Error: The noun 〈sending〉 has an inaccurate meaning; 『gift』 should be used to express the meaning of 'gift', therefore 〈sending〉 is modified to 『gift』 to correctly convey the sentence's meaning.
error_sentence: The dictionary is very important to me,it's my America teacher's sending,so its value can't describe in words.
correct_sentence: It's my American teacher's gift, so its value can't be described in words.
error: describe
correction: be described
error_type: Verb Voice Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Verb Voice Error: The passive voice 『be described』 needs to be used here to express the logical relationship of 'value being described', therefore 〈describe〉 is modified to 『be described』 to correctly convey the sentence's meaning.
error_sentence: According to my memory,it may left on the
shelf in the bedroom.
correct_sentence: According to my memory, it may have been left on the shelf in the bedroom.
correction: have been
error_type: Verb Voice Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Verb Voice Error: The passive voice 『have been left』 needs to be used here to express the logical relationship of 'may have been left', therefore 『have been』 is added after 〈may〉 to correctly convey the sentence's meaning.
error_sentence: According to my memory,it may left on the
shelf in the bedroom.
correct_sentence: According to my memory, it may have been left on the shelf in the bedroom.
error: 

error_type: Space Error
error_severity: 1
error_description: Space Error: The sentence should not have a line break between 〈left on the〉 and 〈shelf〉, as this incorrectly separates sentence components, therefore the line break is deleted.
error_sentence: I hope you can post it to me,i'll pay the postage by myself.

correct_sentence: I hope you can post it to me. I'll pay the postage myself.

error: ,i'll
correction: . I'll
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: ① Punctuation Error: 〈I hope you can post it to me〉 and 〈i'll pay the postage by myself〉 contain independent subject-verb structures and can be independent sentences, therefore 〈,〉 is modified to 『.』 and 〈i'll〉 is changed to 『I'll』; ② Space Error: According to English writing conventions, end-of-sentence punctuation should be followed by a space before the first word of the next sentence, therefore 〈,i'll〉 is modified to 『. I'll』 to conform to the convention.
error_sentence: I hope you can post it to me,i'll pay the postage by myself.

correct_sentence: I'll pay the postage myself.

error: by
error_type: Word Redundancy Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Word Redundancy Error: 〈by〉 is redundant; using 〈myself〉 alone can express the meaning of 'personally', therefore 〈by〉 is deleted to correctly convey the sentence's meaning.
error_sentence: To make the long story short,i'm very grateful to you for me during my study in the United States to provide help and i would appreciate it if you could post the English dictionary to me.

correct_sentence: To make the long story short, I'm very grateful to you for providing help during my study in the United States and I would appreciate it if you could post the English dictionary to me.

error: i'm
correction: I'm
error_type: Case Error
error_severity: 1
error_description: Case Error: According to English writing conventions, 『I』 as a first-person pronoun must always be capitalized in a sentence, regardless of whether it is at the beginning or in the middle of the sentence, therefore 〈i'm〉 needs to be modified to 『I'm』 to conform to the convention.
error_sentence: To make the long story short,i'm very grateful to you for me during my study in the United States to provide help and i would appreciate it if you could post the English dictionary to me.

correct_sentence: To make the long story short, I'm very grateful to you for providing help during my study in the United States and I would appreciate it if you could post the English dictionary to me.

error: me
correction: providing help
error_type: Sentence Structure Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Sentence Structure Error: The original sentence has confused logic and unclear meaning; considering the context, it intends to express 'I am very grateful to you for the help you provided during my study in the United States', therefore 〈me〉 is modified to 『providing help』 to make the meaning coherent and conform to grammatical rules.
error_sentence: To make the long story short,i'm very grateful to you for me during my study in the United States to provide help and i would appreciate it if you could post the English dictionary to me.

correct_sentence: To make the long story short, I'm very grateful to you for providing help during my study in the United States and I would appreciate it if you could post the English dictionary to me.

error: to provide help and i
correction: and I
error_type: Word Redundancy Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: ① Word Redundancy Error: After 〈for〉, 『providing help』 has already been added, making 〈to provide help〉 redundant and disrupting the sentence structure, therefore 〈to provide help〉 is deleted to normalize the sentence structure; ② Case Error: According to English writing conventions, 『I』 as a first-person pronoun must always be capitalized in a sentence, regardless of whether it is at the beginning or in the middle of the sentence, therefore 〈i〉 needs to be modified to 『I』 to conform to the convention.
error_sentence: Yours,Li Hua
correct_sentence: Yours,
Li Hua
correction: 

error_type: Format Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: Format Error: A line break is needed between the letter closing 〈Yours,〉 and the signature 〈Li Hua〉, therefore 〈Li Hua〉 is moved to the next line, aligned to the left, to conform to formal letter format.