Writing prompt: The Internet Has Changed Our Life

Student essay:
A long time ago, there were no computers, so as the Internet. But as the computers had invented, Internet is more essential for our life at present.
Before the Internet invented, our life is less boring and common than nowadays, because people had nothing interesting to do except watching TV, listening to the music, reading books and so on.
After the Internet invents, a tremendous amount of people buy computers, so that they can surf the Internet. It has brought both convenience and knowledge to us which makes our life better and better. Nonetheless, it is unfavorable for young people to surf the Internet for too much time, because it does harm to their eyes.
In my opinion, Internet is not only for fun, it also enriches people's knowledge and experience. As long as not to indulge in amusement, Internet is also a useful tool which can help us a lot.
Maybe in the future, Internet will be more and more popular among the youngs and the olds.

Corrected essay:
A long time ago, there were no computers, nor was there the Internet. But as computers have been invented, the Internet is more and more essential for our life at present.
Before the Internet was invented, our life was more boring and more common than it is now, because people had nothing interesting to do except watching TV, listening to music, reading books and so on.
After the Internet was invented, a tremendous amount of people bought computers, so that they could surf the Internet. It has brought both convenience and knowledge to us, which makes our life better and better. Nonetheless, it is unfavorable for young people to surf the Internet for too much time, because it does harm to their eyes.
In my opinion, the Internet is not only for fun, it also enriches people's knowledge and experience. As long as people don't indulge in amusement, the Internet is also a useful tool which can help us a lot.
Maybe in the future, the Internet will be more and more popular among the young and the old.

Error analysis:
error_sentence: A long time ago, there were no computers, so as the Internet.
correct_sentence: A long time ago, there were no computers, nor was there the Internet.
error: so as
correction: nor was there
error_type: Sentence Structure Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Conjunction Error: The original 『so as』 cannot correctly connect two negative clauses. According to English grammar rules, the conjunction of negative clauses requires 『nor』. Therefore, the incorrect conjunction 『so as』 is corrected to 『nor』 to meet the requirements of a negative parallel structure.; ② Sentence Structure Error: According to English sentence composition rules, the original sentence lacks grammatical components. The corrected 『nor was there』 structure is complete and conforms to English inversion rules (when a negative word is at the beginning of a sentence, an "auxiliary verb + subject" inversion structure is required). The final sentence is adjusted to: 『A long time ago, there were no computers, nor was there the Internet.』.
error_sentence: But as the computers had invented, Internet is more essential for our life at present.

correct_sentence: But as computers have been invented, the Internet is more and more essential for our life at present.

error: the computers had
correction: computers have been
error_type: Verb Voice Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Determiner Error: The definite article 〈the〉 in the original phrase 〈the computers had〉 is redundant when referring to computers as a general category. According to English article usage rules, 〈the〉 is deleted to make the expression more suitable for a generic context, corrected to 『computers had』.; ② Verb Voice Error: When the verb 〈invented〉 means "to invent," it should emphasize an objective fact rather than an active action. According to the context tense (present perfect) and passive voice requirements, the active form 〈had invented〉 is changed to the passive structure 『have been invented』, forming the standard expression 『computers have been invented』.
error_sentence: But as the computers had invented, Internet is more essential for our life at present.

correct_sentence: But as computers have been invented, the Internet is more and more essential for our life at present.

correction: the
error_type: Determiner Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Determiner Error: According to English grammar rules, 〈Internet〉, as a unique and specific network name globally, must be modified by the definite article 『the』. Therefore, it is corrected to 『the Internet』 to comply with the article usage rules for proper nouns.
error_sentence: But as the computers had invented, Internet is more essential for our life at present.

correct_sentence: But as computers have been invented, the Internet is more and more essential for our life at present.

correction: more and
error_type: Adjective Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Adjective Error: The original structure 〈more and〉 is incomplete. According to English rules for expressing gradual comparison, the structure 『more and more』 should be used to indicate a gradual process of change. It is completely corrected to 『more and more』.
error_sentence: Before the Internet invented, our life is less boring and common than nowadays, because people had nothing interesting to do except watching TV, listening to the music, reading books and so on.

correct_sentence: Before the Internet was invented, our life was more boring and more common than it is now, because people had nothing interesting to do except watching TV, listening to music, reading books and so on.

correction: was
error_type: Verb Voice Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Verb Voice Error: The verb 〈invented〉 lacks an auxiliary verb when it needs to form the passive voice. According to the rules for forming the passive voice, 『was』 is added to form the complete passive structure 『was invented』.
error_sentence: Before the Internet invented, our life is less boring and common than nowadays, because people had nothing interesting to do except watching TV, listening to the music, reading books and so on.

correct_sentence: Before the Internet was invented, our life was more boring and more common than it is now, because people had nothing interesting to do except watching TV, listening to music, reading books and so on.

error: is less
correction: was more
error_type: Verb Tense Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Verb Tense Error: When describing a past time context, the present tense 〈is〉 needs to be changed to the past tense 『was』 to maintain tense consistency and comply with the past tense required by the time adverbial.; ② Adjective Error: According to the semantic contrast in the context, the original 〈less〉 is illogical and should be changed to 『more』 to form a correct comparative relationship.
error_sentence: Before the Internet invented, our life is less boring and common than nowadays, because people had nothing interesting to do except watching TV, listening to the music, reading books and so on.

correct_sentence: Before the Internet was invented, our life was more boring and more common than it is now, because people had nothing interesting to do except watching TV, listening to music, reading books and so on.

correction: more
error_type: Adjective Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Adjective Error: In a parallel comparative structure, 『more boring』 and 〈common〉 need to maintain formal symmetry. According to the principle of parallel structure, 『more』 is added before 〈common〉 to form the symmetrical structure 『more common』.
error_sentence: Before the Internet invented, our life is less boring and common than nowadays, because people had nothing interesting to do except watching TV, listening to the music, reading books and so on.

correct_sentence: Before the Internet was invented, our life was more boring and more common than it is now, because people had nothing interesting to do except watching TV, listening to music, reading books and so on.

error: nowadays
correction: it is now
error_type: Sentence Structure Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Sentence Structure Error: The original 〈nowadays〉 as a time adverbial cannot clearly refer to the object of comparison and cannot independently form the object of a comparative structure. According to English comparative structure rules, it is changed to 『it is now』 to clearly refer to the current state, making the object of comparison clear.
error_sentence: Before the Internet invented, our life is less boring and common than nowadays, because people had nothing interesting to do except watching TV, listening to the music, reading books and so on.

correct_sentence: Before the Internet was invented, our life was more boring and more common than it is now, because people had nothing interesting to do except watching TV, listening to music, reading books and so on.

error: the
error_type: Determiner Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Determiner Error: According to English fixed phrase rules, the phrase 〈listen to music〉 does not require the definite article 〈the〉 when used in a generic sense. Therefore, the redundant determiner 〈the〉 is deleted and changed to 『listen to music』 to conform to idiomatic English expression.
error_sentence: After the Internet invents, a tremendous amount of people buy computers, so that they can surf the Internet.
correct_sentence: After the Internet was invented, a tremendous amount of people bought computers, so that they could surf the Internet.
error: invents
correction: was invented
error_type: Verb Tense Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Verb Voice Error: According to the meaning of the sentence, the subject is the recipient of the action and the action occurred in the past, so the passive voice is required. Therefore, the active voice verb 〈invents〉 is changed to the past passive form 『was invented』 to match the semantics of "being invented" and the time context.; ② Verb Tense Error: According to the time context (describing a past event), the present tense verb 〈invents〉 does not match the time background and needs to be adjusted to the past tense form 『was invented』 to ensure tense consistency.
error_sentence: After the Internet invents, a tremendous amount of people buy computers, so that they can surf the Internet.
correct_sentence: After the Internet was invented, a tremendous amount of people bought computers, so that they could surf the Internet.
error: buy
correction: bought
error_type: Verb Tense Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Verb Tense Error: In the context of describing a past action, the base form verb 〈buy〉 needs to be changed to the past tense 『bought』 to maintain tense consistency throughout the sentence (past time frame).
error_sentence: After the Internet invents, a tremendous amount of people buy computers, so that they can surf the Internet.
correct_sentence: After the Internet was invented, a tremendous amount of people bought computers, so that they could surf the Internet.
error: can
correction: could
error_type: Verb Tense Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Verb Tense Error: According to the "sequence of tenses" principle (if the main clause is in the past tense, the subordinate clause should also be in a past tense), when the main clause is in the past tense, the modal verb 〈can〉 in the subordinate clause needs to be adjusted to its past form 『could』 to comply with tense agreement rules.
error_sentence: It has brought both convenience and knowledge to us which makes our life better and better.
correct_sentence: It has brought both convenience and knowledge to us, which makes our life better and better.
correction: ,
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Punctuation Error: According to the writing conventions for non-restrictive relative clauses, a comma 『,』 needs to be added between the clause 〈which makes...〉 and the main clause, changed to 『, which makes...』 to ensure clear sentence structure.
error_sentence: In my opinion, Internet is not only for fun, it also enriches people's knowledge and experience.
correct_sentence: In my opinion, the Internet is not only for fun, it also enriches people's knowledge and experience.
correction: the
error_type: Determiner Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Determiner Error: According to English grammar rules, 〈Internet〉, as a specific and unique entity (the global network system), requires the definite article 『the』. Therefore, it is changed to 『the Internet』 to conform to the expression rules for specific objects.
error_sentence: As long as not to indulge in amusement, Internet is also a useful tool which can help us a lot.

correct_sentence: As long as people don't indulge in amusement, the Internet is also a useful tool which can help us a lot.

error: not to
correction: people don't
error_type: Sentence Structure Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Sentence Structure Error: According to English syntactic rules, a negative structure requires a complete subject-verb form. The original phrase 〈not to〉 does not meet the requirements for sentence components and should be changed to 『people don't』, giving it a subject 『people』 and a predicate 『don't』 to form a complete negative sentence.; ② Auxiliary Error: The subject 『people』 is plural, and its negative structure requires the auxiliary verb 『don't』. Therefore, the incorrect negative expression is adjusted to 『people don't』 to maintain subject-verb agreement.
error_sentence: As long as not to indulge in amusement, Internet is also a useful tool which can help us a lot.

correct_sentence: As long as people don't indulge in amusement, the Internet is also a useful tool which can help us a lot.

correction: the
error_type: Determiner Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Determiner Error: According to English grammar rules, 〈Internet〉, as a specific and unique entity (the global network system), requires the definite article 『the』. Therefore, it is changed to 『the Internet』 to conform to the expression rules for specific objects.
error_sentence: Maybe in the future, Internet will be more and more popular among the youngs and the olds.
correct_sentence: Maybe in the future, the Internet will be more and more popular among the young and the old.
correction: the
error_type: Determiner Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Determiner Error: According to English grammar rules, 〈Internet〉, as a specific and unique entity (the global network system), requires the definite article 『the』. Therefore, it is changed to 『the Internet』 to conform to the expression rules for specific objects.
error_sentence: Maybe in the future, Internet will be more and more popular among the youngs and the olds.
correct_sentence: Maybe in the future, the Internet will be more and more popular among the young and the old.
error: youngs
correction: young
error_type: Noun Number Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Noun Number Error: 〈the young〉 is a fixed collective noun referring to "young people" as a whole and has no plural form. Therefore, the incorrect plural form 〈youngs〉 is deleted and replaced with the standard expression 『the young』.
error_sentence: Maybe in the future, Internet will be more and more popular among the youngs and the olds.
correct_sentence: Maybe in the future, the Internet will be more and more popular among the young and the old.
error: olds
correction: old
error_type: Noun Number Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Noun Number Error: 〈the old〉 is a fixed collective noun referring to "elderly people" as a group, is uncountable, and has no plural form. Therefore, the incorrect plural form 〈olds〉 is deleted and replaced with the standard expression 『the old』 to conform to correct usage.