Writing prompt: Should High School Students Get Online Frequently?

Student essay:
A majority of students think that get online is good for us.In their views,there are 3 points contributing to this attitude as follows:in the first place,they think that they can get more knowledge and broaden their horizons by using the Internet. In the second place,they can communicate with their friends and share something they interest online.Furthermore,they enjoy and relax themselves online.So it goes without saying that high school students get online frequently is good.
But one coin has two sides,some students hold nagtive attitude to this opinion.Firstly,it is harmful to our eyes if we keep watching the screen for long time.Secondly, we will focus on chatting or playing games occassionly.Finally, it naturely wastes our time and energy by getting online.
In my opinion, it is very important to access information online, but we should not pay too much attention on it. Making good use of Internet helps us in many ways but we must arrange our time well.

Corrected essay:
A majority of students think that getting online is good for us. In their views, there are 3 points contributing to this attitude as follows: In the first place, they think that they can get more knowledge and broaden their horizons by using the Internet. In the second place, they can communicate with their friends and share something they are interested in online. Furthermore, they enjoy and relax themselves online. So it goes without saying that high school students getting online frequently is good.
But one coin has two sides. Some students hold a negative attitude to this opinion. Firstly, it is harmful to our eyes if we keep watching the screen for a long time. Secondly, we will focus on chatting or playing games occasionally. Finally, it naturally wastes our time and energy by getting online.
In my opinion, it is very important to access information online, but we should not pay too much attention to it. Making good use of the Internet helps us in many ways but we must arrange our time well.

Error analysis:
error_sentence: A majority of students think that get online is good for us.
correct_sentence: A majority of students think that getting online is good for us.
error: get
correction: getting
error_type: Nonfinite Verb Form Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Nonfinite Verb Form Error: According to English grammar rules, the subject of a clause needs to be in a nonfinite verb form, and 〈get online〉 is the base form of the verb, which is not acceptable. It should be changed to the gerund structure 『getting online』, so that the sentence conforms to the grammatical norm of a nonfinite verb as the subject.
error_sentence: In their views,there are 3 points contributing to this attitude as follows:in the first place,they think that they can get more knowledge and broaden their horizons by using the Internet.
correct_sentence: In the first place, they think that they can get more knowledge and broaden their horizons by using the Internet.
error: in
correction: In
error_type: Case Error
error_severity: 1
error_description: Case Error: According to English writing conventions, the first letter of a paragraph must be capitalized, therefore the lowercase word 〈in〉 is corrected to the capitalized 『In』 to ensure correct formatting.
error_sentence: In the second place,they can communicate with their friends and share something they interest online.
correct_sentence: In the second place, they can communicate with their friends and share something they are interested in online.
error: interest
correction: are interested in
error_type: PoS Confusion Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① PoS Confusion Error: 〈interest〉 is a verb, but according to the sentence meaning, an adjective phrase is needed here to express a state, so it is changed to 『are interested in』 to conform to English idiomatic usage; ② Preposition Error: The phrase structure is incomplete, lacking the necessary preposition 〈in〉, therefore 〈interest〉 is supplemented to 『are interested in』 to make the meaning complete and conform to the fixed collocation.
error_sentence: So it goes without saying that high school students get online frequently is good.

correct_sentence: So it goes without saying that high school students getting online frequently is good.

error: get
correction: getting
error_type: Nonfinite Verb Form Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Nonfinite Verb Form Error: According to English grammar rules, the subject of a clause needs to be in a nonfinite verb form, and 〈get online〉 is the base form of the verb, which is not acceptable. It should be changed to the gerund structure 『getting online』, so that the sentence conforms to the grammatical norm of a nonfinite verb as the subject.
error_sentence: But one coin has two sides,some students hold nagtive attitude to this opinion.
correct_sentence: But one coin has two sides. Some students hold a negative attitude to this opinion.
error: ,some
correction: . Some
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: ① Punctuation Error: Two independent main clauses cannot be connected only by a comma; a period is needed for separation, so the comma 〈,〉 is changed to a period 『.』, and the capitalization at the beginning of the subsequent sentence 『Some』 is corrected to ensure correct sentence structure; ② Space Error: According to English written expression norms, a word following a punctuation mark needs a space after the punctuation, so 〈,some〉 should be changed to 『. Some』 to conform to English written expression norms; ③ Case Error: According to the principle of capitalizing the first letter of the first word of a sentence, the capitalization at the beginning of the subsequent sentence 『Some』 is corrected to ensure correct sentence structure.
error_sentence: But one coin has two sides,some students hold nagtive attitude to this opinion.
correct_sentence: Some students hold a negative attitude to this opinion.
error: nagtive
correction: a negative
error_type: Determiner Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: ① Determiner Error: The countable noun phrase 〈negative attitude〉 lacks an indefinite article before it; 『a』 needs to be added to form 『a negative attitude』, making the expression conform to English grammar rules; ② Spelling Error: 〈nagtive〉 is misspelled; the correct form should be 『negative』, expressing the meaning 'negative', to conform to English vocabulary spelling rules.
error_sentence: Firstly,it is harmful to our eyes if we keep watching the screen for long time.
correct_sentence: Firstly, it is harmful to our eyes if we keep watching the screen for a long time.
correction: a
error_type: Determiner Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Determiner Error: According to English grammar rules, when the countable noun phrase 〈long time〉 appears in its singular form, an indefinite article must be added for determination. Therefore, the determiner 『a』 needs to be added before 〈long time〉 to form the grammatically correct and complete expression 『a long time』.
error_sentence: Secondly, we will focus on chatting or playing games occassionly.
correct_sentence: Secondly, we will focus on chatting or playing games occasionally.
error: occassionly
correction: occasionally
error_type: Spelling Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Spelling Error: According to English word formation, 〈occassionly〉 has a spelling error; the correct adverb form should be 『occasionally』, expressing the meaning 'occasionally', therefore the incorrect spelling 〈occassionly〉 is corrected to 『occasionally』 to conform to standard English spelling rules.
error_sentence: Finally, it naturely wastes our time and energy by getting online.

correct_sentence: Finally, it naturally wastes our time and energy by getting online.

error: naturely
correction: naturally
error_type: Spelling Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Spelling Error: According to English adverb formation rules, 〈naturely〉 is misspelled; the correct form should be 『naturally』, expressing the meaning 'naturally'. Therefore, the incorrect spelling 〈naturely〉 is changed to 『naturally』 to make it conform to the correct spelling form of English vocabulary.
error_sentence: In my opinion, it is very important to access information online, but we should not pay too much attention on it.
correct_sentence: In my opinion, it is very important to access information online, but we should not pay too much attention to it.
error: on
correction: to
error_type: Preposition Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Preposition Error: According to English fixed collocation rules, the phrase 〈pay attention〉 must be used with the preposition 『to』, while the original sentence mistakenly used 〈on〉. Therefore, the incorrect preposition 〈on〉 is corrected to 『to』, forming the standard collocation 『pay attention to』.
error_sentence: Making good use of Internet helps us in many ways but we must arrange our time well.
correct_sentence: Making good use of the Internet helps us in many ways but we must arrange our time well.
correction: the
error_type: Determiner Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Determiner Error: According to English article usage rules, the proper noun 〈Internet〉 requires the definite article 『the』 when specifically referring to the global network. Therefore, 『the』 needs to be added before 〈Internet〉 to form the standard expression 『the Internet』, to conform to English grammar norms.