Writing prompt: To Kill or Not to Kill

Student essay:
The death penalty has been one of the most controversial debates throughout history. More and more development country have been abolished the death penalty. Because they think that everybody all has their rights, and death penalty is an inhumane act .But as far as I am concerned , in china ,death penalty should not be canceled .
Although the modern social law already get rapid progress , but all kinds of new crime continue emerge in endlessly , some to human society cause serious damage .Many people may consider that death penalty is a violent and brutal act, and it is against human moral principles and does little good for the country .But death penalty should not be abolished in my minds ,because death penalty can reduce crime, creating a harmonious environment .Beside ,the idea that a murder must pay with his life has been deeply rooted and firmly planted in the minds of Chinese ,it is nature's law and earth's way .So if our country abolishes the death penalty ,most people will not agree .Because in our country ,the capital punishment only applied to those people who commit the most heinous crimes ,that's what they deserved .
Finally ,I think that death penalty should not be abolished in china .Because in china ,there is a saying that :an eye for an eye .Our country's legal system fit that saying well ,if the person who has killed many people can still be alive ,our society will in a mass .

Corrected essay:
The death penalty has been one of the most controversial debates throughout history. More and more developing countries have abolished the death penalty because they think that everybody has their rights, and death penalty is an inhumane act. But as far as I am concerned, in China, death penalty should not be canceled.
Although the modern social law has already made rapid progress, all kinds of new crimes continue to emerge endlessly, causing serious damage to human society. Many people may consider that death penalty is a violent and brutal act, and it is against human moral principles and does little good for the country. But death penalty should not be abolished in my mind, because death penalty can reduce crime, creating a harmonious environment. Besides, the idea that a murderer must pay with his life has been deeply rooted and firmly planted in the minds of Chinese. It is nature's law and earth's way. So if our country abolishes the death penalty, most people will not agree because in our country, the capital punishment is only applied to those people who commit the most heinous crimes. That's what they deserve.
Finally, I think that death penalty should not be abolished in China because in China, there is a saying: an eye for an eye. Our country's legal system fits that saying well. If the person who has killed many people can still be alive, our society will be in a mess.

Error analysis:
error_sentence: More and more development country have been abolished the death penalty.
correct_sentence: More and more developing countries have abolished the death penalty because they think that everybody has their rights, and death penalty is an inhumane act.
error: development country have been
correction: developing countries have
error_type: PoS Confusion Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① PoS Confusion: The adjective 『developing』 should be used here to modify the noun 〈country〉, so 〈development〉 is changed to 『developing』 to conform to grammatical rules. ② Noun Number Error: 〈country〉 should be in plural form to match 〈More and more〉, so 〈country〉 is changed to 『countries』 to conform to grammatical rules; ③ Word Redundancy: Considering the context, the intended meaning is "more and more developing countries have abolished the death penalty," which should be in active voice, so 〈been〉 is deleted.
error_sentence: More and more development country have been abolished the death penalty. Because they think that everybody all has their rights, and death penalty is an inhumane act .But as far as I am concerned , in china ,death penalty should not be canceled .

correct_sentence: More and more developing countries have abolished the death penalty because they think that everybody has their rights, and death penalty is an inhumane act.
error: . Because
correction: because
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Punctuation Error: The clause introduced by 〈Because〉 cannot stand as an independent sentence and needs to be merged with the main clause, so 〈. Because〉 is changed to 『because』 to conform to grammatical rules.
error_sentence: Because they think that everybody all has their rights, and death penalty is an inhumane act .But as far as I am concerned , in china ,death penalty should not be canceled .

correct_sentence: More and more developing countries have abolished the death penalty because they think that everybody has their rights, and death penalty is an inhumane act.
error: all
error_type: Word Redundancy Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Word Redundancy: 〈everybody〉 itself already implies all individuals, making 〈all〉 a redundant component, so 〈all〉 is deleted to make the sentence more concise.
error_sentence: Because they think that everybody all has their rights, and death penalty is an inhumane act .But as far as I am concerned , in china ,death penalty should not be canceled .

correct_sentence: More and more developing countries have abolished the death penalty because they think that everybody has their rights, and death penalty is an inhumane act. But as far as I am concerned, in China, death penalty should not be canceled.

error: .But
correction: . But
error_type: Space Error
error_severity: 1
error_description: Space Error: A space is needed after the period here, so 〈.But〉 is changed to 『. But』 to conform to writing conventions.
error_sentence: Because they think that everybody all has their rights, and death penalty is an inhumane act .But as far as I am concerned , in china ,death penalty should not be canceled .

correct_sentence: But as far as I am concerned, in China, death penalty should not be canceled.

error: china
correction: China
error_type: Case Error
error_severity: 1
error_description: Case Error: According to English writing conventions, the first letter of a proper noun needs to be capitalized; here, 〈china〉 is a proper noun meaning "China," so 〈china〉 needs to be changed to 『China』 to conform to conventions.
error_sentence: Although the modern social law already get rapid progress , but all kinds of new crime continue emerge in endlessly , some to human society cause serious damage .Many
correct_sentence: Although the modern social law has already made rapid progress, all kinds of new crimes continue to emerge endlessly, causing serious damage to human society.
error: already get
correction: has already made
error_type: Verb Choice Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Verb Tense Error: This indicates an action completed with present impact, requiring the present perfect tense, so 『has』 is added before 〈already〉 to conform to grammatical rules. ② Verb Choice Error: To express "made progress," the fixed phrase 『made progress』 should be used, so 〈get〉 is changed to 『made』 to conform to idiomatic expression.
error_sentence: Although the modern social law already get rapid progress , but all kinds of new crime continue emerge in endlessly , some to human society cause serious damage .Many
correct_sentence: Although the modern social law has already made rapid progress, all kinds of new crimes continue to emerge endlessly, causing serious damage to human society.
error: but
error_type: Word Redundancy Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Word Redundancy: 〈Although〉 and 〈but〉 cannot be used at the same time, so 〈but〉 is deleted to conform to grammatical rules.
error_sentence: Although the modern social law already get rapid progress , but all kinds of new crime continue emerge in endlessly , some to human society cause serious damage .Many
correct_sentence: Although the modern social law has already made rapid progress, all kinds of new crimes continue to emerge endlessly, causing serious damage to human society.
error: crime continue emerge in
correction: crimes continue to emerge
error_type: Word Redundancy Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Noun Number Error: 〈all kinds of〉 should be followed by a plural noun, so 〈crime〉 is changed to 『crimes』 to conform to grammatical rules. ② Nonfinite Verb Form Error: The structure used here is "continue to do sth.", so 〈to〉 is added after 〈continue〉 to conform to idiomatic expression; ③ Word Redundancy: 〈endlessly〉 is an adverb that directly modifies the verb 〈emerge〉, so 〈in〉 is deleted to conform to grammatical rules.
error_sentence: Although the modern social law already get rapid progress , but all kinds of new crime continue emerge in endlessly , some to human society cause serious damage .Many
correct_sentence: Although the modern social law has already made rapid progress, all kinds of new crimes continue to emerge endlessly, causing serious damage to human society.
error: some
correction: causing serious damage
error_type: Sentence Structure Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Sentence Structure Error: The original sentence structure is incomplete and the meaning is unclear; considering the context, the intended meaning is "causing serious damage to human society," so 〈some〉 is changed to the present participle phrase 『causing serious damage』 as an adverbial of attendant circumstances.
error_sentence: Although the modern social law already get rapid progress , but all kinds of new crime continue emerge in endlessly , some to human society cause serious damage .Many
correct_sentence: Although the modern social law has already made rapid progress, all kinds of new crimes continue to emerge endlessly, causing serious damage to human society. Many people may consider that death penalty is a violent and brutal act, and it is against human moral principles and does little good for the country.
error: cause serious damage .Many
correction: . Many
error_type: Word Redundancy Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Word Redundancy: The present participle phrase 『causing serious damage』 has already been used as an adverbial of attendant circumstances, so 〈cause serious damage〉 is deleted to standardize the sentence structure.
error_sentence: people may consider that death penalty is a violent and brutal act, and it is against human moral principles and does little good for the country .But
correct_sentence: Many people may consider that death penalty is a violent and brutal act, and it is against human moral principles and does little good for the country. But death penalty should not be abolished in my mind, because death penalty can reduce crime, creating a harmonious environment.
error: .But
correction: . But
error_type: Space Error
error_severity: 1
error_description: Space Error: The end-of-sentence punctuation should be followed by a space before the first word of the next sentence, so 〈.But〉 is changed to 『. But』 to conform to conventions.
error_sentence: death penalty should not be abolished in my minds ,because death penalty can reduce crime, creating a harmonious environment .Beside ,the idea that a murder must pay with his life has been deeply rooted and firmly planted in the minds of Chinese ,it is nature's law and earth's way .So
correct_sentence: But death penalty should not be abolished in my mind, because death penalty can reduce crime, creating a harmonious environment.
error: minds
correction: mind
error_type: Noun Number Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Noun Number Error: In the fixed expression 〈in my mind〉, 〈mind〉 is an uncountable noun and should be in singular form, so 〈minds〉 is changed to 『mind』 to conform to idiomatic expression.
error_sentence: death penalty should not be abolished in my minds ,because death penalty can reduce crime, creating a harmonious environment .Beside ,the idea that a murder must pay with his life has been deeply rooted and firmly planted in the minds of Chinese ,it is nature's law and earth's way .So
correct_sentence: But death penalty should not be abolished in my mind, because death penalty can reduce crime, creating a harmonious environment. Besides, the idea that a murderer must pay with his life has been deeply rooted and firmly planted in the minds of Chinese.
error: .Beside
correction: . Besides
error_type: Adverb Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: ① Space Error: The end-of-sentence punctuation should be followed by a space before the first word of the next sentence, so a space is added after 〈.〉 to conform to writing conventions. ② Adverb Error: To express "in addition," 『Besides』 should be used instead of the preposition 〈Beside〉, so 〈Beside〉 is changed to 『Besides』 to correctly convey the meaning.
error_sentence: death penalty should not be abolished in my minds ,because death penalty can reduce crime, creating a harmonious environment .Beside ,the idea that a murder must pay with his life has been deeply rooted and firmly planted in the minds of Chinese ,it is nature's law and earth's way .So
correct_sentence: Besides, the idea that a murderer must pay with his life has been deeply rooted and firmly planted in the minds of Chinese.
error: murder
correction: murderer
error_type: Noun Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Noun Error: 〈murder〉 refers to "the act of killing," while here "the killer" is needed, so 〈murder〉 is changed to 『murderer』 to correctly convey the meaning.
error_sentence: death penalty should not be abolished in my minds ,because death penalty can reduce crime, creating a harmonious environment .Beside ,the idea that a murder must pay with his life has been deeply rooted and firmly planted in the minds of Chinese ,it is nature's law and earth's way .So
correct_sentence: Besides, the idea that a murderer must pay with his life has been deeply rooted and firmly planted in the minds of Chinese. It is nature's law and earth's way.
error: ,it
correction: . It
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: ① Punctuation Error: 〈Beside ,the idea that a murder must pay with his life has been deeply rooted and firmly planted in the minds of Chinese〉 and 〈it is nature's law and earth's way〉 contain independent subject-verb structures and can be independent sentences, so 〈,〉 is changed to 『.』 and 〈it〉 is changed to 『It』. ② Space Error: According to English writing conventions, the end-of-sentence punctuation should be followed by a space before the first word of the next sentence, so 〈,it〉 is changed to 『. It』 to conform to conventions.
error_sentence: death penalty should not be abolished in my minds ,because death penalty can reduce crime, creating a harmonious environment .Beside ,the idea that a murder must pay with his life has been deeply rooted and firmly planted in the minds of Chinese ,it is nature's law and earth's way .So
correct_sentence: It is nature's law and earth's way. So if our country abolishes the death penalty, most people will not agree because in our country, the capital punishment is only applied to those people who commit the most heinous crimes.
error: .So
correction: . So
error_type: Space Error
error_severity: 1
error_description: Space Error: According to English writing conventions, the end-of-sentence punctuation should be followed by a space before the first word of the next sentence, so 〈.So〉 is changed to 『. So』 to conform to conventions.
error_sentence: if our country abolishes the death penalty ,most people will not agree .Because
correct_sentence: So if our country abolishes the death penalty, most people will not agree because in our country, the capital punishment is only applied to those people who commit the most heinous crimes.
error: .Because
correction: because
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Punctuation Error: According to English grammar rules, an adverbial clause of reason introduced by 〈Because〉 cannot be an independent sentence and needs to be merged with the preceding sentence, so 〈.Because〉 is changed to 『because』 to make the meaning coherent.
error_sentence: in our country ,the capital punishment only applied to those people who commit the most heinous crimes ,that's what they deserved .

correct_sentence: So if our country abolishes the death penalty, most people will not agree because in our country, the capital punishment is only applied to those people who commit the most heinous crimes.
correction: is
error_type: Verb Voice Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Verb Voice Error: The passive voice structure here is incomplete; 『is』 is missing before 〈only〉 to form the passive voice 『is only applied』, so 『is』 is added before 〈only〉 to complete the sentence structure.
error_sentence: in our country ,the capital punishment only applied to those people who commit the most heinous crimes ,that's what they deserved .

correct_sentence: So if our country abolishes the death penalty, most people will not agree because in our country, the capital punishment is only applied to those people who commit the most heinous crimes. That's what they deserve.

error: ,that
correction: . That
error_severity: 2
error_description: ① Punctuation Error: 〈in our country ,the capital punishment only applied to those people who commit the most heinous crimes〉 and 〈that's what they deserved〉 contain independent subject-verb structures and can be independent sentences, so 〈,〉 is changed to 『.』 and 〈that〉 is changed to 『That』. ② Space Error: According to English writing conventions, the end-of-sentence punctuation should be followed by a space before the first word of the next sentence, so 〈,that〉 is changed to 『. That』 to conform to conventions.
error_sentence: in our country ,the capital punishment only applied to those people who commit the most heinous crimes ,that's what they deserved .

correct_sentence: That's what they deserve.

error: deserved
correction: deserve
error_type: Verb Tense Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Verb Tense Error: Considering the preceding text, the simple present tense should be used here, so 〈deserved〉 is changed to 『deserve』 to maintain tense consistency.
error_sentence: Finally ,I think that death penalty should not be abolished in china .Because in china ,there is a saying that :an eye for an eye .Our
correct_sentence: Finally, I think that death penalty should not be abolished in China because in China, there is a saying: an eye for an eye.
error: china .Because in china
correction: China because in China
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: ① Case Error: According to English writing conventions, the first letter of a proper noun needs to be capitalized; here, 〈china〉 is a proper noun meaning "China," so 〈china〉 needs to be changed to 『China』 to conform to conventions. ② Punctuation Error: According to English grammar rules, an adverbial clause of reason introduced by 〈Because〉 cannot be an independent sentence and needs to be merged with the preceding sentence, so 〈.Because〉 is changed to 『because』 to make the meaning coherent; ③ Case Error: According to English writing conventions, the first letter of a proper noun needs to be capitalized; here, 〈china〉 is a proper noun meaning "China," so 〈china〉 needs to be changed to 『China』 to conform to conventions.
error_sentence: Finally ,I think that death penalty should not be abolished in china .Because in china ,there is a saying that :an eye for an eye .Our
correct_sentence: Finally, I think that death penalty should not be abolished in China because in China, there is a saying: an eye for an eye.
error: that
error_type: Word Redundancy Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Word Redundancy: 〈that〉 is redundant and meaningless here, disrupting the sentence structure, so 〈that〉 is deleted to standardize the sentence structure.
error_sentence: Finally ,I think that death penalty should not be abolished in china .Because in china ,there is a saying that :an eye for an eye .Our
correct_sentence: Finally, I think that death penalty should not be abolished in China because in China, there is a saying: an eye for an eye. Our country's legal system fits that saying well.
error: .Our
correction: . Our
error_type: Space Error
error_severity: 1
error_description: Space Error: According to English writing conventions, the end-of-sentence punctuation should be followed by a space before the first word of the next sentence, so 〈.Our〉 is changed to 『. Our』 to conform to conventions.
error_sentence: country's legal system fit that saying well ,if the person who has killed many people can still be alive ,our society will in a mass .
correct_sentence: Our country's legal system fits that saying well.
error: fit
correction: fits
error_type: Subject-Verb Agreement Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Subject-Verb Agreement Error: The subject 〈system〉 is third-person singular and requires the third-person singular form of the verb, so 〈fit〉 is changed to 『fits』 to conform to subject-verb agreement rules.
error_sentence: country's legal system fit that saying well ,if the person who has killed many people can still be alive ,our society will in a mass .
correct_sentence: Our country's legal system fits that saying well. If the person who has killed many people can still be alive, our society will be in a mess.
error: ,if
correction: . If
error_severity: 2
error_description: ① Punctuation Error: 『Our country's legal system fits that saying well』 and 〈if the person who has killed many people can still be alive ,our society will in a mass〉 contain independent subject-verb structures and can be independent sentences, so 〈,〉 is changed to 『.』 and 〈if〉 is changed to 『If』. ② Space Error: According to English writing conventions, the end-of-sentence punctuation should be followed by a space before the first word of the next sentence, so 〈,if〉 is changed to 『. If』 to conform to conventions.
error_sentence: country's legal system fit that saying well ,if the person who has killed many people can still be alive ,our society will in a mass .
correct_sentence: If the person who has killed many people can still be alive, our society will be in a mess.
correction: be
error_type: Verb Choice Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Verb Choice Error: The predicate structure of the original sentence is incomplete, missing the verb 〈be〉, so 『be』 is added after 〈will〉 to standardize the sentence structure.
error_sentence: country's legal system fit that saying well ,if the person who has killed many people can still be alive ,our society will in a mass .
correct_sentence: If the person who has killed many people can still be alive, our society will be in a mess.
error: mass
correction: mess
error_type: Noun Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Noun Error: 〈mass〉 means "quantity/group," while according to the context, 『mess』 meaning "chaos" is needed here, so 〈mass〉 is changed to 『mess』 to correctly convey the meaning.