Writing prompt: My Hero

Student essay:
My hero is Liu Xiang,he is a track and field player. He broke the world record 13 years. Liu xiang is China's national in the history of the first hat-trick of track and field player.
Liu Xiang started training,he was encouraged at first to train for the high jump. In2001,Liu Xiang won his first international 100m hurdles race in Japan. In 2004,he won the first Olympic gold medal for China in the 110m hurdles race.
Liu Xiang is still a symbol of courage and success,and we continue to take gret pride in him. So I must learned him. Liu xiang aroused my enthusiasm

Corrected essay:
My hero is Liu Xiang. He is a track and field player. He broke the world record 13 years ago. Liu Xiang is China's first track and field player in history to achieve a hat-trick. Liu Xiang started training when he was encouraged at first to train for the high jump. In 2001, Liu Xiang won his first international 110m hurdles race in Japan. In 2004, he won the first Olympic gold medal for China in the 110m hurdles race. Liu Xiang is still a symbol of courage and success, and we continue to take great pride in him. So I must learn from him. Liu Xiang aroused my enthusiasm.

Error analysis:
error_sentence: My hero is Liu Xiang,he is a track and field player.
correct_sentence: My hero is Liu Xiang. He is a track and field player.
error: ,he
correction: . He
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Punctuation Error: According to English writing conventions, two independent clauses 〈My hero is Liu Xiang〉 and 〈he is...〉 cannot be directly connected by a comma; they must be separated by a period, so 〈,〉 needs to be replaced with a period 『.』 and start a new sentence.; ② Space Error: According to English writing conventions, there should be a space after an English punctuation mark to separate it from the character, so 〈,he〉 should be changed to 『. He』.; ③ Case Error: According to English writing conventions, the first letter needs to be capitalized, so 〈he〉 should be changed to 『He』 to conform to the convention.
error_sentence: He broke the world record 13 years.
correct_sentence: He broke the world record 13 years ago.
correction: ago
error_type: Determiner Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Determiner Error: According to English grammar and the original text, the author intends to express "he broke the world record thirteen years ago," but the sentence lacks the necessary time expression determiner 『ago』 to indicate that 〈13 years〉 refers to a time in the past, so 『ago』 is added to make the sentence semantically complete.
error_sentence: Liu xiang is China's national in the history of the first hat-trick of track and field player.

correct_sentence: Liu Xiang is China's first track and field player in history to achieve a hat-trick.
error: xiang
correction: Xiang
error_type: Case Error
error_severity: 1
error_description: Case Error: According to English writing conventions, the first letter of the proper noun 〈xiang〉 needs to be capitalized; it should be changed to 『Xiang』 to conform to English conventions.
error_sentence: Liu xiang is China's national in the history of the first hat-trick of track and field player.

correct_sentence: Liu Xiang is China's first track and field player in history to achieve a hat-trick.
error: national in the history of the first
correction: first track and field player in history to achieve a
error_type: Sentence Structure Error
error_severity: 5
error_description: ① Sentence Structure Error: According to English grammar, the original phrase 〈national in the history of the first〉 is semantically unclear and structurally chaotic, so it is changed to 『first track and field player in history to achieve a』 to make the meaning clear.; ② Noun Error: According to English grammar, the meaning of 〈national〉 does not fit the context and should be replaced with 『track and field player』 to clarify the identity.; ③ Word Order Error: According to English grammar, the word order of 〈in the history of the first〉 is chaotic and should be adjusted to 『first...in history』 to conform to English expression habits.
error_sentence: Liu xiang is China's national in the history of the first hat-trick of track and field player.

correct_sentence: Liu Xiang is China's first track and field player in history to achieve a hat-trick.
error: of track and field player.

correction: .
error_type: Sentence Structure Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: Sentence Structure Error: According to English grammar and the original text, 〈of track and field player〉 appears twice in the sentence, making the components redundant and the sentence structure incomplete, so the part after 〈of track and field player〉 is replaced with 『.』.
error_sentence: Liu Xiang started training,he was encouraged at first to train for the high jump.
correct_sentence: Liu Xiang started training when he was encouraged at first to train for the high jump.
error: ,
correction: when
error_type: Conjunction Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: Conjunction Error: According to English grammar, a conjunction 『when』 is needed in a complex sentence to clarify the relationship between time and action, so 〈,〉 is replaced with 『when』 to maintain semantic coherence.
error_sentence: In2001,Liu
correct_sentence: In 2001, Liu Xiang won his first international 110m hurdles race in Japan.
error: In2001,Liu
correction: In 2001, Liu
error_severity: 2
error_description: ① Space Error: According to English writing conventions, there needs to be a space between the year and the comma, but the time expression 〈In2001〉 lacks the necessary space, so 〈In2001〉 is changed to 『In 2001』 to conform to English writing conventions.; ② Space Error: According to English writing conventions, there needs to be a space between the word and the comma, but the time expression 〈,Liu〉 lacks the necessary space, so 〈,Liu〉 is changed to 『, Liu』 to conform to English writing conventions.
error_sentence: Xiang won his first international 100m hurdles race in Japan.
correct_sentence: In 2001, Liu Xiang won his first international 110m hurdles race in Japan.
error: 100
correction: 110
error_type: Noun Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Noun Error: According to common knowledge of sports events, the distance expression for the event 〈100m hurdles〉 is incorrect and needs to be changed to 『110m hurdles』 to conform to the actual situation, so 〈100〉 is modified to 『110』 to ensure factual accuracy.
error_sentence: In 2004,he won the first Olympic gold medal for China in the 110m hurdles race.

correct_sentence: In 2004, he won the first Olympic gold medal for China in the 110m hurdles race.
error: 2004,he
correction: 2004, he
error_severity: 1
error_description: Space Error: According to English writing conventions, a space needs to be added after the comma to separate it from the subject, so 〈2004,he〉 is changed to 『2004, he』 to conform to the convention.
error_sentence: In 2004,he won the first Olympic gold medal for China in the 110m hurdles race.

correct_sentence: In 2004, he won the first Olympic gold medal for China in the 110m hurdles race. Liu Xiang is still a symbol of courage and success, and we continue to take great pride in him.
error: 

error_sentence: Liu Xiang is still a symbol of courage and success,and we continue to take gret pride in him.
correct_sentence: Liu Xiang is still a symbol of courage and success, and we continue to take great pride in him.
error: gret
correction: great
error_severity: 1
error_description: Spelling Error: According to English writing conventions, 〈gret〉 is a misspelling of 〈great〉, meaning "(of quantity or degree) very large," and should be changed to 『great』 to conform to correct spelling conventions and sentence meaning.
error_sentence: So I must learned him.
correct_sentence: So I must learn from him.
error: learned
correction: learn from
error_type: Verb Tense Error
error_severity: 5
error_description: ① Verb Tense Error: According to English grammar, "must" is a modal verb and should be followed by the base form of the verb, so 〈learned〉 should be changed to 『learn』 to conform to the correct verb tense.; ② Preposition Error: According to English grammar, the phrase 〈learned him〉 is semantically incorrect and needs to be changed to 『learn from him』 to correctly express the meaning of learning from someone.
error_sentence: Liu xiang aroused my enthusiasm
correct_sentence: Liu Xiang aroused my enthusiasm.
error: xiang
correction: Xiang
error_type: Case Error
error_severity: 1
error_description: Case Error: According to English writing conventions, the first letter of the proper noun 〈xiang〉 needs to be capitalized; it should be changed to 『Xiang』 to conform to English conventions.
error_sentence: Liu xiang aroused my enthusiasm
correct_sentence: Liu Xiang aroused my enthusiasm.
correction: .
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 1
error_description: Punctuation Error: According to English writing conventions, a sentence needs to end with a period to conform to English writing conventions, so 『.』 is added to conform to correct writing conventions.