Before revision: Mountain View, CA: Mayfield Publishing Company As health-related behaviors, such as smoking and alcohol abuse , increased or became more resistant to change, so did the recognition that these behaviors are influenced by factors such as the media, politics, and businesses, which are outside the direct control of the individuals.
After revision: Mountain View, CA: Mayfield Publishing Company As health-related behaviors, such as smoking and excessive use of alcohol , increased or became more resistant to change, so did the recognition that these behaviors are influenced by factors such as the media, politics, and businesses, which are outside the direct control of the individuals.