Emotion: anxiety
Problem: ongoing depression
Situation: related to the current pandemic

user: Hello I am here to discuss my anxiety over the current pandemic.

assistant: Hey there! That's a good topic to talk about. With everything that's been going on, it's normal to feel some anxiety. What do you think is one thing that is giving you a lot of anxiety?

user: Thank you very much for your understanding. Yeah it's tough especially with rising cases for the past two weeks or so in my city. I live in Canada and my city is pretty good so far and really low on numbers but have been seeing new cases every day for the last two weeks or so so that adds anxiety to me when I go out and I am more on guard and paranoid

assistant: I'm sorry to hear that. Similar stuff is happening where I am, and I also get anxious hearing about it.

user: And we had a lock-down earlier this year and yet, with the exception of one province, every province remains operational at full speed despite lock-downs earlier, and now a lot of provinces are seeing record cases with the second wave. yeah I hope you get through this okay also and stay safe and well.

assistant: What do you feel when you feel on guard and paranoid? Try to say some more about that if you can. Thanks, I hope the same for you.

user: I go out pretty much only when I have a purpose and personal admin/errands. I work about one or two days a week out of my home. So with the rising cases, I just feel anxious having to get out of the safety of my home. I was a lot more anxious earlier this year though. I am much more used to it at this time. And it's hard where everyday is the same for me and staying at home, without a change of pace like even simple walks outside, going to the gym, or going to hike or run etc. I pretty much missed out the whole year after March. My life has been on hold and I am just surprised that it's even november now, because it feels like I am still stuck in March.

assistant: Yeah, that makes sense. When this was all new, the uncertainty probably made for more anxiety. Now that we know some more about what is safe and what isn't, maybe less so. But it doesn't mean the anxiety is gone, of course. It's still around in our day-to-day lives. Well said. You feel stuck. The usual things you would do now are just not available to you.

user: yeah I have been adjusting to it and the cases were down and even to zero in my city for most of the last few months, but there's definitely the start of a new community spread now. yes correct Plus there's a loss of routine or motivation. I procrastinate a lot and get lost in thought or lost without thought. I don't work out as much as I used to (inside or outside of home). I don't eat as well and my sleep pattern is not good at all (I sleep a lot later than I should). So I am disappointed in myself to say the least. and also feeling guilty to see myself waste my life and time this way and not being productive

assistant: I can rephrase some of this, if you don't mind. In a way, you're talking about activities that you may have used (gym, hikes, etc) to keep yourself in a good mood. Now that those don't seem available, you just don't have those opportunities to boost your mood. It makes sense that you would be feeling this way.

user: now I am more used to it of course, but this summarizes how I have been feeling for most of this year.

assistant: I think you explained yourself really well. Thanks for sharing how you've been feeling.

user: yes you're right. That's exactly it. I think it's going to be this way for a long time. I see other people compromising and taking the risk to go out for walks or runs, and even to the gym. I could have done that for the last few months when we had zero cases for awhile, but I didn't want to gamble and compromise. And I still see those people as selfish when I choose to do what I think is right. yeah no worries. It's good that you understand and thank you for listening.

assistant: Do you think if you went ahead anyway to the gym or out for runs that you would feel guilty for doing them?

user: We won't know more about the mental implications and the sociological aspects of the pandemic probably until years to come. I thought about that

assistant: Yeah, and that just throws on another layer of why things are difficult right now. No one wants to feel guilty for doing things that could help themselves.

user: to the gym, I certainly would. Because it's indoors and I do feel it's unsafe as there are many equipment that others could touch. Running I felt that way because the path that I usually run on is narrow and other people walk through it also. However, I did have second thoughts about that when the case numbers were down. But I finally decided to keep doing it and stick to all outdoor trips for essential business. but that's just me, and I know we all have different personalities, preferences, and tolerances of risks and acceptances, etc.

assistant: Have you ever heard of the phrase "black or white thinking?" As in, thinking that situations or people are completely good or completely bad? Or completely doable or completely impossible?

user: so in my opinion, I feel a little indignant at the people that have been going out frivolously like there's nothing going on, to even gamble their safety and their family's. Like I live in an apartment building, and the people around me and below me are always going out, even for the last few months. So I don't feel safe either but also indignant that others are doing what I could have done, but that I had compromised on for my safety and everyone else's safety. So I just didn't feel it was fair for them to do that when I could have done that anytime I wanted. black and white thinking...let me think for this pandemic, it's pretty much black and white

assistant: Yeah, I think I understand that too. I get really frustrated hearing about people hosting big parties or not wearing masks because they think it's no big deal. They're putting others at risk.

user: Because I either go out or I don't. I have to compromise my values and everything I worked hard to preserve for the last few months to go out, even if I put on extra protection etc. And I just rigidly refuse to compromise my values because I don't believe it's right. Because if I had done that, I would have done that already, and long ago. And even though it's really hard on me. yeah exactly. Because people are being selfish and are subjecting others to risks even if they don't care about themselves. but I know I am pretty extreme in my thinking. I really love the outdoors and I go out pretty often before the pandemic. But it's just that my own thinking is rigid and made up about it. But anyhow, that's the situation in a nutshell.

assistant: I think we all do black-or-white thinking to some extent. We're wired to try and make sense of the world, and maybe our brains don't like to spend time on nuance and grey areas. We all tend to quickly categorize things into good or bad, easy or hard, black or white.

user: yeah I understand your thinking with the grey areas as well. I suppose for this case, it's all black and white for me, no grea areas or compromises. that's good analysis by the way. But anyhow I am good to go then. Thank you so very much for understanding and for your valuable inputs.

assistant: Does this time have to be a "waste" for you? With no productivity? That seems pretty extreme.

user: it's a fascinating area though, fascinating thinking. I am also curious on the social and mental implications of this in the long-run but only time will tell there will be so much research and books written about our times. well I do a lot of "waste" at home. So I am quite sluggish and lazy and lost at home.

assistant: Thanks for saying that! I liked talking with you, and we can wrap this up. I guess I'm saying you sound thoughtful and intelligent, I'm confident that you could find ways to get more out of this time if that's what you're wanting to do.

user: I am productive but not as driven or productive as before at home. for sure yeah. I am sure we can get through all this in one piece eventually. I was thinking this also that even though this is a very tough time, we will look back on this about years from now, and say wow, we got through all that!

assistant: Not as productive? Of course! It's a pandemic. We all are. :) Hope you're not too hard on yourself right now.

user: no no I am okay thanks for asking I am just kind of spelling in out the details of my thinking and how my life has been so far I am actually okay so no worries

assistant: Ha, exactly. Maybe we're not all thriving and getting rich and adding 15 pounds of muscle during this time. But we can get through it.

user: yup. Exactly. Lost time can always be made up later. okay then. I am good to go. Thanks again and thank you for your input. It does help to just kind of vent in a way.

assistant: Before we quit, would you want to say one specific thing you know you can do today to help yourself out?

user: Yeah for sure I worked out a little bit before I started the chat. I am also doing some online courses on my own time. So I will keep working hard on those. And I hope to get back more into the routine of working out. I really do think it helps my mood if I just make more time and motivation for that. And you seem intelligent and analytical also and you know what I mean. So I do appreciate your time and input

assistant: Nice! Good job with those things.

user: thanks. I hope you best of luck then with all your endeavours. I know we can all get through this time. Thank you. stay well and stay safe my friend

assistant: Right on, same to you. It's okay to feel anxious right now. It's okay to feel unproductive right now. It's also okay to keep on doing the things that make you feel okay. Great job keeping up the workouts and the classes.

user: Thank you and all the best.