Emotion: depression
Problem: breakup with partner
Situation: My wife cheated on me and wanted a divorce.  I have been super depressed.  My house is a mess.  I have a small business that I have let go.  I need to get up and get things done but have no motivation.  I need help getting motivated again.

user: I should add (although it doesn't matter). I'm female married to a female.

assistant: Hi there! I'm glad you're here

user: hi

assistant: So you're a female and you're married to a female? There's nothing wrong with that at all!

user: Yes....well we are not living together now. We have to file papers for divorce

assistant: I see. So you're actually legally married - didn't just have a commitment ceremony?

user: Yes legally married

assistant: Care to share what led up to filing for divorce?

user: She cheated. And as far as I know is still with the person

assistant: I can certainly understand how that feels. I have been in your EXACT situation.

user: It's horrible and hard to move on for sure

assistant: How long were you with her?

user: Don't laugh Our one year wedding anniversary was this past Sat. Which I know I shouldnt be so miserable but I am. I think because like some people have told me we were still in our honeymoon stage. We were not fighting or having big issues....she just cheated

assistant: I'm so incredibly sorry to hear that. You realize this behavior, these choices, are a flaw within her, and not you?

user: It's hard to see that. I feel like a failure and not good enough Like why even get married in the first place if you are just going to cheat

assistant: I can completely understand that as well. I blamed myself for quite some time as well.

user: Ya you wish you could go back in time and change things or never get married lol

assistant: When you go to bed at night, if you can drift off to dream with a clear conscience, then you're doing significantly better than her! What are you doing to take care of you during this time?

user: Not much at all I feel like I'm in a funk and can't get out of it. My house is a disaster. I have a small business I am not in the mood to work on....I"ve been slacking in everything

assistant: You are important! You matter! Why not do something that is relaxing to you?

user: I do need to do something

assistant: Do you have any post-it notes? Or paper and scotch tape?

user: I do

assistant: Here's what I've done for myself, and other folks that are close to me, going through struggles...

user: ok

assistant: Jot down inspirational messages and hang them up on the bathroom mirror, refrigerator, car, etc. "You matter", "You deserve the best", "You are the shiznit", etc

user: the shiznet lol I will try that I need to do something

assistant: Then, for the tasks that might be getting a bit behind, make a list, in order of importance -- and include a little reward for each task completed.

user: Thats a good idea

assistant: We have to take care of ourselves. After doing it for awhile, it just might become second nature to ya. And -- if continued, will show gals in the future exactly how you expect to be treated because they'll see you taking care of you (and not settling for nor accepting any doodie)

user: I know I keep telling myself if I get my act together (physically, financially, etc) that I would attract better people....the kind I want to be with

assistant: Whether you "have your act together" or not, it's up to you to determine who is worthy of being an active part of your life.