SLY: Ay, it stands so that I may hardly tarry so long. But I would be loath to fall into my dreams again: I will therefore tarry in despite of the flesh and the blood. Messenger: Your honour's players, heating your amendment, Are come to play a pleasant comedy; For so your doctors hold it very meet, Seeing too much sadness hath congeal'd your blood, And melancholy is the nurse of frenzy: Therefore they thought it good you hear a play And frame your mind to mirth and merriment, Which bars a thousand harms and lengthens life. SLY: Marry, I will, let them play it. Is not a comondy a Christmas gambold or a tumbling-trick? Page: No, my good lord; it is more pleasing stuff. SLY: What, household stuff? Page: It is a kind of history. SLY: Well, well see't. Come, madam wife, sit by my side and let the world slip: we shall ne'er be younger. LUCENTIO: Tranio, since for the great desire I had To see fair Padua, nursery of arts, I am arrived for fruitful Lombardy, The pleasant garden of great Italy; And by my father's love and leave am arm'd With his good will and thy good company, My trusty servant, well approved in all, Here let us breathe and haply institute A course of learning and ingenious studies. Pisa renown'd for grave citizens Gave me my being and my father first, A merchant of great traffic through the world, Vincetino come of Bentivolii. Vincetino's son brought up in Florence It shall become to serve all hopes conceived, To deck his fortune with his virtuous deeds: And therefore, Tranio, for the time I study, Virtue and that part of philosophy Will I apply that treats of happiness By virtue specially to be achieved. Tell me thy mind; for I have Pisa left And am to Padua come, as he that leaves A shallow plash to plunge him in the deep And with satiety seeks to quench his thirst. TRANIO: Mi perdonato, gentle master mine, I am in all affected as yourself; Glad that you thus continue your resolve To suck the sweets of sweet philosophy. Only, good master, while we do admire This virtue and this moral discipline, Let's be no stoics nor no stocks, I pray; Or so devote to Aristotle's cheques As Ovid be an outcast quite abjured: Balk logic with acquaintance that you have And practise rhetoric in your common talk; Music and poesy use to quicken you; The mathematics and the metaphysics, Fall to them as you find your stomach serves you; No profit grows where is no pleasure ta'en: In brief, sir, study what you most affect. LUCENTIO: Gramercies, Tranio, well dost thou advise. If, Biondello, thou wert come ashore, We could at once put us in readiness, And take a lodging fit to entertain Such friends as time in Padua shall beget. But stay a while: what company is this? TRANIO: Master, some show to welcome us to town. BAPTISTA: Gentlemen, importune me no farther, For how I firmly am resolved you know; That is, not bestow my youngest daughter Before I have a husband for the elder: If either of you both love Katharina, Because I know you well and love you well, Leave shall you have to court her at your pleasure. GREMIO: KATHARINA: I pray you, sir, is it your will To make a stale of me amongst these mates? HORTENSIO: Mates, maid! how mean you that? no mates for you, Unless you were of gentler, milder mould. KATHARINA: I'faith, sir, you shall never need to fear: I wis it is not half way to her heart; But if it were, doubt not her care should be To comb your noddle with a three-legg'd stool And paint your face and use you like a fool. HORTENSIA: From all such devils, good Lord deliver us! GREMIO: And me too, good Lord! TRANIO: Hush, master! here's some good pastime toward: That wench is stark mad or wonderful froward. LUCENTIO: But in the other's silence do I see Maid's mild behavior and sobriety. Peace, Tranio! TRANIO: Well said, master; mum! and gaze your fill. BAPTISTA: Gentlemen, that I may soon make good What I have said, Bianca, get you in: And let it not displease thee, good Bianca, For I will love thee ne'er the less, my girl. KATHARINA: A pretty peat! it is best Put finger in the eye, an she knew why. BIANCA: Sister, content you in my discontent. Sir, to your pleasure humbly I subscribe: My books and instruments shall be my company, On them to took and practise by myself. LUCENTIO: Hark, Tranio! thou may'st hear Minerva speak. HORTENSIO: Signior Baptista, will you be so strange? Sorry am I that our good will effects Bianca's grief. GREMIO: Why will you mew her up, Signior Baptista, for this fiend of hell, And make her bear the penance of her tongue? BAPTISTA: Gentlemen, content ye; I am resolved: Go in, Bianca: And for I know she taketh most delight In music, instruments and poetry, Schoolmasters will I keep within my house, Fit to instruct her youth. If you, Hortensio, Or Signior Gremio, you, know any such, Prefer them hither; for to cunning men I will be very kind, and liberal To mine own children in good bringing up: And so farewell. Katharina, you may stay; For I have more to commune with Bianca. KATHARINA: Why, and I trust I may go too, may I not? What, shall I be appointed hours; as though, belike, I knew not what to take and what to leave, ha? GREMIO: You may go to the devil's dam: your gifts are so good, here's none will hold you. Their love is not so great, Hortensio, but we may blow our nails together, and fast it fairly out: our cakes dough on both sides. Farewell: yet for the love I bear my sweet Bianca, if I can by any means light on a fit man to teach her that wherein she delights, I will wish him to her father. HORTENSIO: So will I, Signior Gremio: but a word, I pray. Though the nature of our quarrel yet never brooked parle, know now, upon advice, it toucheth us both, that we may yet again have access to our fair mistress and be happy rivals in Bianco's love, to labour and effect one thing specially. GREMIO: What's that, I pray? HORTENSIO: Marry, sir, to get a husband for her sister. GREMIO: A husband! a devil. HORTENSIO: I say, a husband. GREMIO: I say, a devil. Thinkest thou, Hortensio, though her father be very rich, any man is so very a fool to be married to hell? HORTENSIO: Tush, Gremio, though it pass your patience and mine to endure her loud alarums, why, man, there be good fellows in the world, an a man could light on them, would take her with all faults, and money enough. GREMIO: I cannot tell; but I had as lief take her dowry with this condition, to be whipped at the high cross every morning. HORTENSIO: Faith, as you say, there's small choice in rotten apples. But come; since this bar in law makes us friends, it shall be so far forth friendly maintained all by helping Baptista's eldest daughter to a husband we set his youngest free for a husband, and then have to't a fresh. Sweet Bianca! Happy man be his dole! He that runs fastest gets the ring. How say you, Signior Gremio? GREMIO: I am agreed; and would I had given him the best horse in Padua to begin his wooing that would thoroughly woo her, wed her and bed her and rid the house of her! Come on. TRANIO: I pray, sir, tell me, is it possible That love should of a sudden take such hold? LUCENTIO: O Tranio, till I found it to be true, I never thought it possible or likely; But see, while idly I stood looking on, I found the effect of love in idleness: And now in plainness do confess to thee, That art to me as secret and as dear As Anna to the queen of Carthage was, Tranio, I burn, I pine, I perish, Tranio, If I achieve not this young modest girl. Counsel me, Tranio, for I know thou canst; Assist me, Tranio, for I know thou wilt. TRANIO: Master, it is no time to chide you now; Affection is not rated from the heart: If love have touch'd you, nought remains but so, 'Redime te captum quam queas minimo.' LUCENTIO: Gramercies, lad, go forward; this contents: The rest will comfort, for thy counsel's sound. TRANIO: Master, you look'd so longly on the maid, Perhaps you mark'd not what's the pith of all. LUCENTIO: O yes, I saw sweet beauty in her face, Such as the daughter of Agenor had, That made great Jove to humble him to her hand. When with his knees he kiss'd the Cretan strand. TRANIO: Saw you no more? mark'd you not how her sister Began to scold and raise up such a storm That mortal ears might hardly endure the din? LUCENTIO: Tranio, I saw her coral lips to move And with her breath she did perfume the air: Sacred and sweet was all I saw in her. TRANIO: Nay, then, 'tis time to stir him from his trance. I pray, awake, sir: if you love the maid, Bend thoughts and wits to achieve her. Thus it stands: Her eldest sister is so curst and shrewd That till the father rid his hands of her, Master, your love must live a maid at home; And therefore has he closely mew'd her up, Because she will not be annoy'd with suitors. LUCENTIO: Ah, Tranio, what a cruel father's he! But art thou not advised, he took some care To get her cunning schoolmasters to instruct her? TRANIO: Ay, marry, am I, sir; and now 'tis plotted. LUCENTIO: I have it, Tranio. TRANIO: Master, for my hand, Both our inventions meet and jump in one. LUCENTIO: Tell me thine first. TRANIO: You will be schoolmaster And undertake the teaching of the maid: That's your device. LUCENTIO: It is: may it be done? TRANIO: Not possible; for who shall bear your part, And be in Padua here Vincentio's son, Keep house and ply his book, welcome his friends, Visit his countrymen and banquet them? LUCENTIO: Basta; content thee, for I have it full. We have not yet been seen in any house, Nor can we lie distinguish'd by our faces For man or master; then it follows thus; Thou shalt be master, Tranio, in my stead, Keep house and port and servants as I should: I will some other be, some Florentine, Some Neapolitan, or meaner man of Pisa. 'Tis hatch'd and shall be so: Tranio, at once Uncase thee; take my colour'd hat and cloak: When Biondello comes, he waits on thee; But I will charm him first to keep his tongue. TRANIO: So had you need. In brief, sir, sith it your pleasure is, And I am tied to be obedient; For so your father charged me at our parting, 'Be serviceable to my son,' quoth he, Although I think 'twas in another sense; I am content to be Lucentio, Because so well I love Lucentio. LUCENTIO: Tranio, be so, because Lucentio loves: And let me be a slave, to achieve that maid Whose sudden sight hath thrall'd my wounded eye. Here comes the rogue. Sirrah, where have you been? BIONDELLO: Where have I been! Nay, how now! where are you? Master, has my fellow Tranio stolen your clothes? Or you stolen his? or both? pray, what's the news? LUCENTIO: Sirrah, come hither: 'tis no time to jest, And therefore frame your manners to the time. Your fellow Tranio here, to save my life, Puts my apparel and my countenance on, And I for my escape have put on his; For in a quarrel since I came ashore I kill'd a man and fear I was descried: Wait you on him, I charge you, as becomes, While I make way from hence to save my life: You understand me? BIONDELLO: I, sir! ne'er a whit. LUCENTIO: And not a jot of Tranio in your mouth: Tranio is changed into Lucentio. BIONDELLO: The better for him: would I were so too! TRANIO: So could I, faith, boy, to have the next wish after, That Lucentio indeed had Baptista's youngest daughter. But, sirrah, not for my sake, but your master's, I advise You use your manners discreetly in all kind of companies: When I am alone, why, then I am Tranio; But in all places else your master Lucentio. LUCENTIO: Tranio, let's go: one thing more rests, that thyself execute, to make one among these wooers: if thou ask me why, sufficeth, my reasons are both good and weighty. First Servant: My lord, you nod; you do not mind the play. SLY: Yes, by Saint Anne, do I. A good matter, surely: comes there any more of it? Page: My lord, 'tis but begun. SLY: 'Tis a very excellent piece of work, madam lady: would 'twere done! PETRUCHIO: Verona, for a while I take my leave, To see my friends in Padua, but of all My best beloved and approved friend, Hortensio; and I trow this is his house. Here, sirrah Grumio; knock, I say. GRUMIO: Knock, sir! whom should I knock? is there man has rebused your worship? PETRUCHIO: Villain, I say, knock me here soundly. GRUMIO: Knock you here, sir! why, sir, what am I, sir, that I should knock you here, sir? PETRUCHIO: Villain, I say, knock me at this gate And rap me well, or I'll knock your knave's pate. GRUMIO: My master is grown quarrelsome. I should knock you first, And then I know after who comes by the worst. PETRUCHIO: Will it not be? Faith, sirrah, an you'll not knock, I'll ring it; I'll try how you can sol, fa, and sing it. GRUMIO: Help, masters, help! my master is mad. PETRUCHIO: Now, knock when I bid you, sirrah villain! HORTENSIO: How now! what's the matter? My old friend Grumio! and my good friend Petruchio! How do you all at Verona? PETRUCHIO: Signior Hortensio, come you to part the fray? 'Con tutto il cuore, ben trovato,' may I say. HORTENSIO: 'Alla nostra casa ben venuto, molto honorato signor mio Petruchio.' Rise, Grumio, rise: we will compound this quarrel. GRUMIO: Nay, 'tis no matter, sir, what he 'leges in Latin. if this be not a lawful case for me to leave his service, look you, sir, he bid me knock him and rap him soundly, sir: well, was it fit for a servant to use his master so, being perhaps, for aught I see, two and thirty, a pip out? Whom would to God I had well knock'd at first, Then had not Grumio come by the worst. PETRUCHIO: A senseless villain! Good Hortensio, I bade the rascal knock upon your gate And could not get him for my heart to do it. GRUMIO: Knock at the gate! O heavens! Spake you not these words plain, 'Sirrah, knock me here, rap me here, knock me well, and knock me soundly'? And come you now with, 'knocking at the gate'? PETRUCHIO: Sirrah, be gone, or talk not, I advise you. HORTENSIO: Petruchio, patience; I am Grumio's pledge: Why, this's a heavy chance 'twixt him and you, Your ancient, trusty, pleasant servant Grumio. And tell me now, sweet friend, what happy gale Blows you to Padua here from old Verona? PETRUCHIO: Such wind as scatters young men through the world, To seek their fortunes farther than at home Where small experience grows. But in a few, Signior Hortensio, thus it stands with me: Antonio, my father, is deceased; And I have thrust myself into this maze, Haply to wive and thrive as best I may: Crowns in my purse I have and goods at home, And so am come abroad to see the world. HORTENSIO: Petruchio, shall I then come roundly to thee And wish thee to a shrewd ill-favour'd wife? Thou'ldst thank me but a little for my counsel: And yet I'll promise thee she shall be rich And very rich: but thou'rt too much my friend, And I'll not wish thee to her. PETRUCHIO: Signior Hortensio, 'twixt such friends as we Few words suffice; and therefore, if thou know One rich enough to be Petruchio's wife, As wealth is burden of my wooing dance, Be she as foul as was Florentius' love, As old as Sibyl and as curst and shrewd As Socrates' Xanthippe, or a worse, She moves me not, or not removes, at least, Affection's edge in me, were she as rough As are the swelling Adriatic seas: I come to wive it wealthily in Padua; If wealthily, then happily in Padua. GRUMIO: Nay, look you, sir, he tells you flatly what his mind is: Why give him gold enough and marry him to a puppet or an aglet-baby; or an old trot with ne'er a tooth in her head, though she have as many diseases as two and fifty horses: why, nothing comes amiss, so money comes withal. HORTENSIO: Petruchio, since we are stepp'd thus far in, I will continue that I broach'd in jest. I can, Petruchio, help thee to a wife With wealth enough and young and beauteous, Brought up as best becomes a gentlewoman: Her only fault, and that is faults enough, Is that she is intolerable curst And shrewd and froward, so beyond all measure That, were my state far worser than it is, I would not wed her for a mine of gold. PETRUCHIO: Hortensio, peace! thou know'st not gold's effect: Tell me her father's name and 'tis enough; For I will board her, though she chide as loud As thunder when the clouds in autumn crack. HORTENSIO: Her father is Baptista Minola, An affable and courteous gentleman: Her name is Katharina Minola, Renown'd in Padua for her scolding tongue. PETRUCHIO: I know her father, though I know not her; And he knew my deceased father well. I will not sleep, Hortensio, till I see her; And therefore let me be thus bold with you To give you over at this first encounter, Unless you will accompany me thither. GRUMIO: I pray you, sir, let him go while the humour lasts. O' my word, an she knew him as well as I do, she would think scolding would do little good upon him: she may perhaps call him half a score knaves or so: why, that's nothing; an he begin once, he'll rail in his rope-tricks. I'll tell you what sir, an she stand him but a little, he will throw a figure in her face and so disfigure her with it that she shall have no more eyes to see withal than a cat. You know him not, sir. HORTENSIO: Tarry, Petruchio, I must go with thee, For in Baptista's keep my treasure is: He hath the jewel of my life in hold, His youngest daughter, beautiful Binaca, And her withholds from me and other more, Suitors to her and rivals in my love, Supposing it a thing impossible, For those defects I have before rehearsed, That ever Katharina will be woo'd; Therefore this order hath Baptista ta'en, That none shall have access unto Bianca Till Katharina the curst have got a husband. GRUMIO: Katharina the curst! A title for a maid of all titles the worst. HORTENSIO: Now shall my friend Petruchio do me grace, And offer me disguised in sober robes To old Baptista as a schoolmaster Well seen in music, to instruct Bianca; That so I may, by this device, at least Have leave and leisure to make love to her And unsuspected court her by herself. GRUMIO: Here's no knavery! See, to beguile the old folks, how the young folks lay their heads together! Master, master, look about you: who goes there, ha? HORTENSIO: Peace, Grumio! it is the rival of my love. Petruchio, stand by a while. GRUMIO: A proper stripling and an amorous! GREMIO: O, very well; I have perused the note. Hark you, sir: I'll have them very fairly bound: All books of love, see that at any hand; And see you read no other lectures to her: You understand me: over and beside Signior Baptista's liberality, I'll mend it with a largess. Take your paper too, And let me have them very well perfumed For she is sweeter than perfume itself To whom they go to. What will you read to her? LUCENTIO: Whate'er I read to her, I'll plead for you As for my patron, stand you so assured, As firmly as yourself were still in place: Yea, and perhaps with more successful words Than you, unless you were a scholar, sir. GREMIO: O this learning, what a thing it is! GRUMIO: O this woodcock, what an ass it is! PETRUCHIO: Peace, sirrah! HORTENSIO: Grumio, mum! God save you, Signior Gremio. GREMIO: And you are well met, Signior Hortensio. Trow you whither I am going? To Baptista Minola. I promised to inquire carefully About a schoolmaster for the fair Bianca: And by good fortune I have lighted well On this young man, for learning and behavior Fit for her turn, well read in poetry And other books, good ones, I warrant ye. HORTENSIO: 'Tis well; and I have met a gentleman Hath promised me to help me to another, A fine musician to instruct our mistress; So shall I no whit be behind in duty To fair Bianca, so beloved of me. GREMIO: Beloved of me; and that my deeds shall prove. GRUMIO: And that his bags shall prove. HORTENSIO: Gremio, 'tis now no time to vent our love: Listen to me, and if you speak me fair, I'll tell you news indifferent good for either. Here is a gentleman whom by chance I met, Upon agreement from us to his liking, Will undertake to woo curst Katharina, Yea, and to marry her, if her dowry please. GREMIO: So said, so done, is well. Hortensio, have you told him all her faults? PETRUCHIO: I know she is an irksome brawling scold: If that be all, masters, I hear no harm. GREMIO: No, say'st me so, friend? What countryman? PETRUCHIO: Born in Verona, old Antonio's son: My father dead, my fortune lives for me; And I do hope good days and long to see. GREMIO: O sir, such a life, with such a wife, were strange! But if you have a stomach, to't i' God's name: You shall have me assisting you in all. But will you woo this wild-cat? PETRUCHIO: Will I live? GRUMIO: Will he woo her? ay, or I'll hang her. PETRUCHIO: Why came I hither but to that intent? Think you a little din can daunt mine ears? Have I not in my time heard lions roar? Have I not heard the sea puff'd up with winds Rage like an angry boar chafed with sweat? Have I not heard great ordnance in the field, And heaven's artillery thunder in the skies? Have I not in a pitched battle heard Loud 'larums, neighing steeds, and trumpets' clang? And do you tell me of a woman's tongue, That gives not half so great a blow to hear As will a chestnut in a farmer's fire? Tush, tush! fear boys with bugs. GRUMIO: For he fears none. GREMIO: Hortensio, hark: This gentleman is happily arrived, My mind presumes, for his own good and ours. HORTENSIO: I promised we would be contributors And bear his charging of wooing, whatsoe'er. GREMIO: And so we will, provided that he win her. GRUMIO: I would I were as sure of a good dinner. TRANIO: Gentlemen, God save you. If I may be bold, Tell me, I beseech you, which is the readiest way To the house of Signior Baptista Minola? BIONDELLO: He that has the two fair daughters: is't he you mean? TRANIO: Even he, Biondello. GREMIO: Hark you, sir; you mean not her to-- TRANIO: Perhaps, him and her, sir: what have you to do? PETRUCHIO: Not her that chides, sir, at any hand, I pray. TRANIO: I love no chiders, sir. Biondello, let's away. LUCENTIO: Well begun, Tranio. HORTENSIO: Sir, a word ere you go; Are you a suitor to the maid you talk of, yea or no? TRANIO: And if I be, sir, is it any offence? GREMIO: No; if without more words you will get you hence. TRANIO: Why, sir, I pray, are not the streets as free For me as for you? GREMIO: But so is not she. TRANIO: For what reason, I beseech you? GREMIO: For this reason, if you'll know, That she's the choice love of Signior Gremio. HORTENSIO: That she's the chosen of Signior Hortensio. TRANIO: Softly, my masters! if you be gentlemen, Do me this right; hear me with patience. Baptista is a noble gentleman, To whom my father is not all unknown; And were his daughter fairer than she is, She may more suitors have and me for one. Fair Leda's daughter had a thousand wooers; Then well one more may fair Bianca have: And so she shall; Lucentio shall make one, Though Paris came in hope to speed alone. GREMIO: What! this gentleman will out-talk us all. LUCENTIO: Sir, give him head: I know he'll prove a jade. PETRUCHIO: Hortensio, to what end are all these words? HORTENSIO: Sir, let me be so bold as ask you, Did you yet ever see Baptista's daughter? TRANIO: No, sir; but hear I do that he hath two, The one as famous for a scolding tongue As is the other for beauteous modesty. PETRUCHIO: Sir, sir, the first's for me; let her go by. GREMIO: Yea, leave that labour to great Hercules; And let it be more than Alcides' twelve. PETRUCHIO: Sir, understand you this of me in sooth: The youngest daughter whom you hearken for Her father keeps from all access of suitors, And will not promise her to any man Until the elder sister first be wed: The younger then is free and not before. TRANIO: If it be so, sir, that you are the man Must stead us all and me amongst the rest, And if you break the ice and do this feat, Achieve the elder, set the younger free For our access, whose hap shall be to have her Will not so graceless be to be ingrate. HORTENSIO: Sir, you say well and well you do conceive; And since you do profess to be a suitor, You must, as we do, gratify this gentleman, To whom we all rest generally beholding. TRANIO: Sir, I shall not be slack: in sign whereof, Please ye we may contrive this afternoon, And quaff carouses to our mistress' health, And do as adversaries do in law, Strive mightily, but eat and drink as friends. GRUMIO: O excellent motion! Fellows, let's be gone. HORTENSIO: The motion's good indeed and be it so, Petruchio, I shall be your ben venuto. BIANCA: Good sister, wrong me not, nor wrong yourself, To make a bondmaid and a slave of me; That I disdain: but for these other gawds, Unbind my hands, I'll pull them off myself, Yea, all my raiment, to my petticoat; Or what you will command me will I do, So well I know my duty to my elders. KATHARINA: Of all thy suitors, here I charge thee, tell Whom thou lovest best: see thou dissemble not. BIANCA: Believe me, sister, of all the men alive I never yet beheld that special face Which I could fancy more than any other. KATHARINA: Minion, thou liest. Is't not Hortensio? BIANCA: If you affect him, sister, here I swear I'll plead for you myself, but you shall have him. KATHARINA: O then, belike, you fancy riches more: You will have Gremio to keep you fair. BIANCA: Is it for him you do envy me so? Nay then you jest, and now I well perceive You have but jested with me all this while: I prithee, sister Kate, untie my hands. KATHARINA: If that be jest, then all the rest was so. BAPTISTA: Why, how now, dame! whence grows this insolence? Bianca, stand aside. Poor girl! she weeps. Go ply thy needle; meddle not with her. For shame, thou helding of a devilish spirit, Why dost thou wrong her that did ne'er wrong thee? When did she cross thee with a bitter word? KATHARINA: Her silence flouts me, and I'll be revenged. BAPTISTA: What, in my sight? Bianca, get thee in. KATHARINA: What, will you not suffer me? Nay, now I see She is your treasure, she must have a husband; I must dance bare-foot on her wedding day And for your love to her lead apes in hell. Talk not to me: I will go sit and weep Till I can find occasion of revenge. BAPTISTA: Was ever gentleman thus grieved as I? But who comes here? GREMIO: Good morrow, neighbour Baptista. BAPTISTA: Good morrow, neighbour Gremio. God save you, gentlemen! PETRUCHIO: And you, good sir! Pray, have you not a daughter Call'd Katharina, fair and virtuous? BAPTISTA: I have a daughter, sir, called Katharina. GREMIO: You are too blunt: go to it orderly. PETRUCHIO: You wrong me, Signior Gremio: give me leave. I am a gentleman of Verona, sir, That, hearing of her beauty and her wit, Her affability and bashful modesty, Her wondrous qualities and mild behavior, Am bold to show myself a forward guest Within your house, to make mine eye the witness Of that report which I so oft have heard. And, for an entrance to my entertainment, I do present you with a man of mine, Cunning in music and the mathematics, To instruct her fully in those sciences, Whereof I know she is not ignorant: Accept of him, or else you do me wrong: His name is Licio, born in Mantua. BAPTISTA: You're welcome, sir; and he, for your good sake. But for my daughter Katharina, this I know, She is not for your turn, the more my grief. PETRUCHIO: I see you do not mean to part with her, Or else you like not of my company. BAPTISTA: Mistake me not; I speak but as I find. Whence are you, sir? what may I call your name? PETRUCHIO: Petruchio is my name; Antonio's son, A man well known throughout all Italy. BAPTISTA: I know him well: you are welcome for his sake. GREMIO: Saving your tale, Petruchio, I pray, Let us, that are poor petitioners, speak too: Baccare! you are marvellous forward. PETRUCHIO: O, pardon me, Signior Gremio; I would fain be doing. GREMIO: I doubt it not, sir; but you will curse your wooing. Neighbour, this is a gift very grateful, I am sure of it. To express the like kindness, myself, that have been more kindly beholding to you than any, freely give unto you this young scholar, that hath been long studying at Rheims; as cunning in Greek, Latin, and other languages, as the other in music and mathematics: his name is Cambio; pray, accept his service. BAPTISTA: A thousand thanks, Signior Gremio. Welcome, good Cambio. But, gentle sir, methinks you walk like a stranger: may I be so bold to know the cause of your coming? TRANIO: Pardon me, sir, the boldness is mine own, That, being a stranger in this city here, Do make myself a suitor to your daughter, Unto Bianca, fair and virtuous. Nor is your firm resolve unknown to me, In the preferment of the eldest sister. This liberty is all that I request, That, upon knowledge of my parentage, I may have welcome 'mongst the rest that woo And free access and favour as the rest: And, toward the education of your daughters, I here bestow a simple instrument, And this small packet of Greek and Latin books: If you accept them, then their worth is great. BAPTISTA: Lucentio is your name; of whence, I pray? TRANIO: Of Pisa, sir; son to Vincentio. BAPTISTA: A mighty man of Pisa; by report I know him well: you are very welcome, sir, Take you the lute, and you the set of books; You shall go see your pupils presently. Holla, within! Sirrah, lead these gentlemen To my daughters; and tell them both, These are their tutors: bid them use them well. We will go walk a little in the orchard, And then to dinner. You are passing welcome, And so I pray you all to think yourselves. PETRUCHIO: Signior Baptista, my business asketh haste, And every day I cannot come to woo. You knew my father well, and in him me, Left solely heir to all his lands and goods, Which I have better'd rather than decreased: Then tell me, if I get your daughter's love, What dowry shall I have with her to wife? BAPTISTA: After my death the one half of my lands, And in possession twenty thousand crowns. PETRUCHIO: And, for that dowry, I'll assure her of Her widowhood, be it that she survive me, In all my lands and leases whatsoever: Let specialties be therefore drawn between us, That covenants may be kept on either hand. BAPTISTA: Ay, when the special thing is well obtain'd, That is, her love; for that is all in all. PETRUCHIO: Why, that is nothing: for I tell you, father, I am as peremptory as she proud-minded; And where two raging fires meet together They do consume the thing that feeds their fury: Though little fire grows great with little wind, Yet extreme gusts will blow out fire and all: So I to her and so she yields to me; For I am rough and woo not like a babe. BAPTISTA: Well mayst thou woo, and happy be thy speed! But be thou arm'd for some unhappy words. PETRUCHIO: Ay, to the proof; as mountains are for winds, That shake not, though they blow perpetually. BAPTISTA: How now, my friend! why dost thou look so pale? HORTENSIO: For fear, I promise you, if I look pale. BAPTISTA: What, will my daughter prove a good musician? HORTENSIO: I think she'll sooner prove a soldier Iron may hold with her, but never lutes. BAPTISTA: Why, then thou canst not break her to the lute? HORTENSIO: Why, no; for she hath broke the lute to me. I did but tell her she mistook her frets, And bow'd her hand to teach her fingering; When, with a most impatient devilish spirit, 'Frets, call you these?' quoth she; 'I'll fume with them:' And, with that word, she struck me on the head, And through the instrument my pate made way; And there I stood amazed for a while, As on a pillory, looking through the lute; While she did call me rascal fiddler And twangling Jack; with twenty such vile terms, As had she studied to misuse me so. PETRUCHIO: Now, by the world, it is a lusty wench; I love her ten times more than e'er I did: O, how I long to have some chat with her! BAPTISTA: Well, go with me and be not so discomfited: Proceed in practise with my younger daughter; She's apt to learn and thankful for good turns. Signior Petruchio, will you go with us, Or shall I send my daughter Kate to you? PETRUCHIO: I pray you do. I will attend her here, And woo her with some spirit when she comes. Say that she rail; why then I'll tell her plain She sings as sweetly as a nightingale: Say that she frown, I'll say she looks as clear As morning roses newly wash'd with dew: Say she be mute and will not speak a word; Then I'll commend her volubility, And say she uttereth piercing eloquence: If she do bid me pack, I'll give her thanks, As though she bid me stay by her a week: If she deny to wed, I'll crave the day When I shall ask the banns and when be married. But here she comes; and now, Petruchio, speak. Good morrow, Kate; for that's your name, I hear. KATHARINA: Well have you heard, but something hard of hearing: They call me Katharina that do talk of me. PETRUCHIO: You lie, in faith; for you are call'd plain Kate, And bonny Kate and sometimes Kate the curst; But Kate, the prettiest Kate in Christendom Kate of Kate Hall, my super-dainty Kate, For dainties are all Kates, and therefore, Kate, Take this of me, Kate of my consolation; Hearing thy mildness praised in every town, Thy virtues spoke of, and thy beauty sounded, Yet not so deeply as to thee belongs, Myself am moved to woo thee for my wife. KATHARINA: Moved! in good time: let him that moved you hither Remove you hence: I knew you at the first You were a moveable. PETRUCHIO: Why, what's a moveable? KATHARINA: A join'd-stool. PETRUCHIO: Thou hast hit it: come, sit on me. KATHARINA: Asses are made to bear, and so are you. PETRUCHIO: Women are made to bear, and so are you. KATHARINA: No such jade as you, if me you mean. PETRUCHIO: Alas! good Kate, I will not burden thee; For, knowing thee to be but young and light-- KATHARINA: Too light for such a swain as you to catch; And yet as heavy as my weight should be. PETRUCHIO: Should be! should--buzz! KATHARINA: Well ta'en, and like a buzzard. PETRUCHIO: O slow-wing'd turtle! shall a buzzard take thee? KATHARINA: Ay, for a turtle, as he takes a buzzard. PETRUCHIO: Come, come, you wasp; i' faith, you are too angry. KATHARINA: If I be waspish, best beware my sting. PETRUCHIO: My remedy is then, to pluck it out. KATHARINA: Ay, if the fool could find it where it lies, PETRUCHIO: Who knows not where a wasp does wear his sting? In his tail. KATHARINA: In his tongue. PETRUCHIO: Whose tongue? KATHARINA: Yours, if you talk of tails: and so farewell. PETRUCHIO: What, with my tongue in your tail? nay, come again, Good Kate; I am a gentleman. KATHARINA: That I'll try. PETRUCHIO: I swear I'll cuff you, if you strike again. KATHARINA: So may you lose your arms: If you strike me, you are no gentleman; And if no gentleman, why then no arms. PETRUCHIO: A herald, Kate? O, put me in thy books! KATHARINA: What is your crest? a coxcomb? PETRUCHIO: A combless cock, so Kate will be my hen. KATHARINA: No cock of mine; you crow too like a craven. PETRUCHIO: Nay, come, Kate, come; you must not look so sour. KATHARINA: It is my fashion, when I see a crab. PETRUCHIO: Why, here's no crab; and therefore look not sour. KATHARINA: There is, there is. PETRUCHIO: Then show it me. KATHARINA: Had I a glass, I would. PETRUCHIO: What, you mean my face? KATHARINA: Well aim'd of such a young one. PETRUCHIO: Now, by Saint George, I am too young for you. KATHARINA: Yet you are wither'd. PETRUCHIO: 'Tis with cares. KATHARINA: I care not. PETRUCHIO: Nay, hear you, Kate: in sooth you scape not so. KATHARINA: I chafe you, if I tarry: let me go. PETRUCHIO: No, not a whit: I find you passing gentle. 'Twas told me you were rough and coy and sullen, And now I find report a very liar; For thou are pleasant, gamesome, passing courteous, But slow in speech, yet sweet as spring-time flowers: Thou canst not frown, thou canst not look askance, Nor bite the lip, as angry wenches will, Nor hast thou pleasure to be cross in talk, But thou with mildness entertain'st thy wooers, With gentle conference, soft and affable. Why does the world report that Kate doth limp? O slanderous world! Kate like the hazel-twig Is straight and slender and as brown in hue As hazel nuts and sweeter than the kernels. O, let me see thee walk: thou dost not halt. KATHARINA: Go, fool, and whom thou keep'st command. PETRUCHIO: Did ever Dian so become a grove As Kate this chamber with her princely gait? O, be thou Dian, and let her be Kate; And then let Kate be chaste and Dian sportful! KATHARINA: Where did you study all this goodly speech? PETRUCHIO: It is extempore, from my mother-wit. KATHARINA: A witty mother! witless else her son. PETRUCHIO: Am I not wise? KATHARINA: Yes; keep you warm. PETRUCHIO: Marry, so I mean, sweet Katharina, in thy bed: And therefore, setting all this chat aside, Thus in plain terms: your father hath consented That you shall be my wife; your dowry 'greed on; And, Will you, nill you, I will marry you. Now, Kate, I am a husband for your turn; For, by this light, whereby I see thy beauty, Thy beauty, that doth make me like thee well, Thou must be married to no man but me; For I am he am born to tame you Kate, And bring you from a wild Kate to a Kate Conformable as other household Kates. Here comes your father: never make denial; I must and will have Katharina to my wife. BAPTISTA: Now, Signior Petruchio, how speed you with my daughter? PETRUCHIO: How but well, sir? how but well? It were impossible I should speed amiss. BAPTISTA: Why, how now, daughter Katharina! in your dumps? KATHARINA: Call you me daughter? now, I promise you You have show'd a tender fatherly regard, To wish me wed to one half lunatic; A mad-cup ruffian and a swearing Jack, That thinks with oaths to face the matter out. PETRUCHIO: Father, 'tis thus: yourself and all the world, That talk'd of her, have talk'd amiss of her: If she be curst, it is for policy, For she's not froward, but modest as the dove; She is not hot, but temperate as the morn; For patience she will prove a second Grissel, And Roman Lucrece for her chastity: And to conclude, we have 'greed so well together, That upon Sunday is the wedding-day. KATHARINA: I'll see thee hang'd on Sunday first. GREMIO: Hark, Petruchio; she says she'll see thee hang'd first. TRANIO: Is this your speeding? nay, then, good night our part! PETRUCHIO: Be patient, gentlemen; I choose her for myself: If she and I be pleased, what's that to you? 'Tis bargain'd 'twixt us twain, being alone, That she shall still be curst in company. I tell you, 'tis incredible to believe How much she loves me: O, the kindest Kate! She hung about my neck; and kiss on kiss She vied so fast, protesting oath on oath, That in a twink she won me to her love. O, you are novices! 'tis a world to see, How tame, when men and women are alone, A meacock wretch can make the curstest shrew. Give me thy hand, Kate: I will unto Venice, To buy apparel 'gainst the wedding-day. Provide the feast, father, and bid the guests; I will be sure my Katharina shall be fine. BAPTISTA: I know not what to say: but give me your hands; God send you joy, Petruchio! 'tis a match. GREMIO: Amen, say we: we will be witnesses. PETRUCHIO: Father, and wife, and gentlemen, adieu; I will to Venice; Sunday comes apace: We will have rings and things and fine array; And kiss me, Kate, we will be married o'Sunday. GREMIO: Was ever match clapp'd up so suddenly? BAPTISTA: Faith, gentlemen, now I play a merchant's part, And venture madly on a desperate mart. TRANIO: 'Twas a commodity lay fretting by you: 'Twill bring you gain, or perish on the seas. BAPTISTA: The gain I seek is, quiet in the match. GREMIO: No doubt but he hath got a quiet catch. But now, Baptists, to your younger daughter: Now is the day we long have looked for: I am your neighbour, and was suitor first. TRANIO: And I am one that love Bianca more Than words can witness, or your thoughts can guess. GREMIO: Youngling, thou canst not love so dear as I. TRANIO: Graybeard, thy love doth freeze. GREMIO: But thine doth fry. Skipper, stand back: 'tis age that nourisheth. TRANIO: But youth in ladies' eyes that flourisheth. BAPTISTA: Content you, gentlemen: I will compound this strife: 'Tis deeds must win the prize; and he of both That can assure my daughter greatest dower Shall have my Bianca's love. Say, Signior Gremio, What can you assure her? GREMIO: First, as you know, my house within the city Is richly furnished with plate and gold; Basins and ewers to lave her dainty hands; My hangings all of Tyrian tapestry; In ivory coffers I have stuff'd my crowns; In cypress chests my arras counterpoints, Costly apparel, tents, and canopies, Fine linen, Turkey cushions boss'd with pearl, Valance of Venice gold in needlework, Pewter and brass and all things that belong To house or housekeeping: then, at my farm I have a hundred milch-kine to the pail, Sixscore fat oxen standing in my stalls, And all things answerable to this portion. Myself am struck in years, I must confess; And if I die to-morrow, this is hers, If whilst I live she will be only mine. TRANIO: That 'only' came well in. Sir, list to me: I am my father's heir and only son: If I may have your daughter to my wife, I'll leave her houses three or four as good, Within rich Pisa walls, as any one Old Signior Gremio has in Padua; Besides two thousand ducats by the year Of fruitful land, all which shall be her jointure. What, have I pinch'd you, Signior Gremio? GREMIO: Two thousand ducats by the year of land! My land amounts not to so much in all: That she shall have; besides an argosy That now is lying in Marseilles' road. What, have I choked you with an argosy? TRANIO: Gremio, 'tis known my father hath no less Than three great argosies; besides two galliases, And twelve tight galleys: these I will assure her, And twice as much, whate'er thou offer'st next. GREMIO: Nay, I have offer'd all, I have no more; And she can have no more than all I have: If you like me, she shall have me and mine. TRANIO: Why, then the maid is mine from all the world, By your firm promise: Gremio is out-vied. BAPTISTA: I must confess your offer is the best; And, let your father make her the assurance, She is your own; else, you must pardon me, if you should die before him, where's her dower? TRANIO: That's but a cavil: he is old, I young. GREMIO: And may not young men die, as well as old? BAPTISTA: Well, gentlemen, I am thus resolved: on Sunday next you know My daughter Katharina is to be married: Now, on the Sunday following, shall Bianca Be bride to you, if you this assurance; If not, Signior Gremio: And so, I take my leave, and thank you both. GREMIO: Adieu, good neighbour. Now I fear thee not: Sirrah young gamester, your father were a fool To give thee all, and in his waning age Set foot under thy table: tut, a toy! An old Italian fox is not so kind, my boy. TRANIO: A vengeance on your crafty wither'd hide! Yet I have faced it with a card of ten. 'Tis in my head to do my master good: I see no reason but supposed Lucentio Must get a father, call'd 'supposed Vincentio;' And that's a wonder: fathers commonly Do get their children; but in this case of wooing, A child shall get a sire, if I fail not of my cunning. LUCENTIO: Fiddler, forbear; you grow too forward, sir: Have you so soon forgot the entertainment Her sister Katharina welcomed you withal? HORTENSIO: But, wrangling pedant, this is The patroness of heavenly harmony: Then give me leave to have prerogative; And when in music we have spent an hour, Your lecture shall have leisure for as much. LUCENTIO: Preposterous ass, that never read so far To know the cause why music was ordain'd! Was it not to refresh the mind of man After his studies or his usual pain? Then give me leave to read philosophy, And while I pause, serve in your harmony. HORTENSIO: Sirrah, I will not bear these braves of thine. BIANCA: Why, gentlemen, you do me double wrong, To strive for that which resteth in my choice: I am no breeching scholar in the schools; I'll not be tied to hours nor 'pointed times, But learn my lessons as I please myself. And, to cut off all strife, here sit we down: Take you your instrument, play you the whiles; His lecture will be done ere you have tuned. HORTENSIO: You'll leave his lecture when I am in tune? LUCENTIO: That will be never: tune your instrument. BIANCA: Where left we last? LUCENTIO: Here, madam: 'Hic ibat Simois; hic est Sigeia tellus; Hic steterat Priami regia celsa senis.' BIANCA: Construe them. LUCENTIO: 'Hic ibat,' as I told you before, 'Simois,' I am Lucentio, 'hic est,' son unto Vincentio of Pisa, 'Sigeia tellus,' disguised thus to get your love; 'Hic steterat,' and that Lucentio that comes a-wooing, 'Priami,' is my man Tranio, 'regia,' bearing my port, 'celsa senis,' that we might beguile the old pantaloon. HORTENSIO: Madam, my instrument's in tune. BIANCA: Let's hear. O fie! the treble jars. LUCENTIO: Spit in the hole, man, and tune again. BIANCA: Now let me see if I can construe it: 'Hic ibat Simois,' I know you not, 'hic est Sigeia tellus,' I trust you not; 'Hic steterat Priami,' take heed he hear us not, 'regia,' presume not, 'celsa senis,' despair not. HORTENSIO: Madam, 'tis now in tune. LUCENTIO: All but the base. HORTENSIO: The base is right; 'tis the base knave that jars. How fiery and forward our pedant is! Now, for my life, the knave doth court my love: Pedascule, I'll watch you better yet. BIANCA: In time I may believe, yet I mistrust. LUCENTIO: Mistrust it not: for, sure, AEacides Was Ajax, call'd so from his grandfather. BIANCA: I must believe my master; else, I promise you, I should be arguing still upon that doubt: But let it rest. Now, Licio, to you: Good masters, take it not unkindly, pray, That I have been thus pleasant with you both. HORTENSIO: You may go walk, and give me leave a while: My lessons make no music in three parts. LUCENTIO: Are you so formal, sir? well, I must wait, And watch withal; for, but I be deceived, Our fine musician groweth amorous. HORTENSIO: Madam, before you touch the instrument, To learn the order of my fingering, I must begin with rudiments of art; To teach you gamut in a briefer sort, More pleasant, pithy and effectual, Than hath been taught by any of my trade: And there it is in writing, fairly drawn. BIANCA: Why, I am past my gamut long ago. HORTENSIO: Yet read the gamut of Hortensio. BIANCA: Servant: Mistress, your father prays you leave your books And help to dress your sister's chamber up: You know to-morrow is the wedding-day. BIANCA: Farewell, sweet masters both; I must be gone. LUCENTIO: Faith, mistress, then I have no cause to stay. HORTENSIO: But I have cause to pry into this pedant: Methinks he looks as though he were in love: Yet if thy thoughts, Bianca, be so humble To cast thy wandering eyes on every stale, Seize thee that list: if once I find thee ranging, Hortensio will be quit with thee by changing. BAPTISTA: KATHARINA: No shame but mine: I must, forsooth, be forced To give my hand opposed against my heart Unto a mad-brain rudesby full of spleen; Who woo'd in haste and means to wed at leisure. I told you, I, he was a frantic fool, Hiding his bitter jests in blunt behavior: And, to be noted for a merry man, He'll woo a thousand, 'point the day of marriage, Make feasts, invite friends, and proclaim the banns; Yet never means to wed where he hath woo'd. Now must the world point at poor Katharina, And say, 'Lo, there is mad Petruchio's wife, If it would please him come and marry her!' TRANIO: Patience, good Katharina, and Baptista too. Upon my life, Petruchio means but well, Whatever fortune stays him from his word: Though he be blunt, I know him passing wise; Though he be merry, yet withal he's honest. KATHARINA: Would Katharina had never seen him though! BAPTISTA: Go, girl; I cannot blame thee now to weep; For such an injury would vex a very saint, Much more a shrew of thy impatient humour. BIONDELLO: Master, master! news, old news, and such news as you never heard of! BAPTISTA: Is it new and old too? how may that be? BIONDELLO: Why, is it not news, to hear of Petruchio's coming? BAPTISTA: Is he come? BIONDELLO: Why, no, sir. BAPTISTA: What then? BIONDELLO: He is coming. BAPTISTA: When will he be here? BIONDELLO: When he stands where I am and sees you there. TRANIO: But say, what to thine old news? BIONDELLO: Why, Petruchio is coming in a new hat and an old jerkin, a pair of old breeches thrice turned, a pair of boots that have been candle-cases, one buckled, another laced, an old rusty sword ta'en out of the town-armory, with a broken hilt, and chapeless; with two broken points: his horse hipped with an old mothy saddle and stirrups of no kindred; besides, possessed with the glanders and like to mose in the chine; troubled with the lampass, infected with the fashions, full of wingdalls, sped with spavins, rayed with yellows, past cure of the fives, stark spoiled with the staggers, begnawn with the bots, swayed in the back and shoulder-shotten; near-legged before and with, a half-chequed bit and a head-stall of sheeps leather which, being restrained to keep him from stumbling, hath been often burst and now repaired with knots; one girth six time pieced and a woman's crupper of velure, which hath two letters for her name fairly set down in studs, and here and there pieced with packthread. BAPTISTA: Who comes with him? BIONDELLO: O, sir, his lackey, for all the world caparisoned like the horse; with a linen stock on one leg and a kersey boot-hose on the other, gartered with a red and blue list; an old hat and 'the humour of forty fancies' pricked in't for a feather: a monster, a very monster in apparel, and not like a Christian footboy or a gentleman's lackey. TRANIO: 'Tis some odd humour pricks him to this fashion; Yet oftentimes he goes but mean-apparell'd. BAPTISTA: I am glad he's come, howsoe'er he comes. BIONDELLO: Why, sir, he comes not. BAPTISTA: Didst thou not say he comes? BIONDELLO: Who? that Petruchio came? BAPTISTA: Ay, that Petruchio came. BIONDELLO: No, sir, I say his horse comes, with him on his back. BAPTISTA: Why, that's all one. BIONDELLO: Nay, by Saint Jamy, I hold you a penny, A horse and a man Is more than one, And yet not many. PETRUCHIO: Come, where be these gallants? who's at home? BAPTISTA: You are welcome, sir. PETRUCHIO: And yet I come not well. BAPTISTA: And yet you halt not. TRANIO: Not so well apparell'd As I wish you were. PETRUCHIO: Were it better, I should rush in thus. But where is Kate? where is my lovely bride? How does my father? Gentles, methinks you frown: And wherefore gaze this goodly company, As if they saw some wondrous monument, Some comet or unusual prodigy? BAPTISTA: Why, sir, you know this is your wedding-day: First were we sad, fearing you would not come; Now sadder, that you come so unprovided. Fie, doff this habit, shame to your estate, An eye-sore to our solemn festival! TRANIO: And tells us, what occasion of import Hath all so long detain'd you from your wife, And sent you hither so unlike yourself? PETRUCHIO: Tedious it were to tell, and harsh to hear: Sufficeth I am come to keep my word, Though in some part enforced to digress; Which, at more leisure, I will so excuse As you shall well be satisfied withal. But where is Kate? I stay too long from her: The morning wears, 'tis time we were at church. TRANIO: See not your bride in these unreverent robes: Go to my chamber; Put on clothes of mine. PETRUCHIO: Not I, believe me: thus I'll visit her. BAPTISTA: But thus, I trust, you will not marry her. PETRUCHIO: Good sooth, even thus; therefore ha' done with words: To me she's married, not unto my clothes: Could I repair what she will wear in me, As I can change these poor accoutrements, 'Twere well for Kate and better for myself. But what a fool am I to chat with you, When I should bid good morrow to my bride, And seal the title with a lovely kiss! TRANIO: He hath some meaning in his mad attire: We will persuade him, be it possible, To put on better ere he go to church. BAPTISTA: I'll after him, and see the event of this. TRANIO: But to her love concerneth us to add Her father's liking: which to bring to pass, As I before unparted to your worship, I am to get a man,--whate'er he be, It skills not much. we'll fit him to our turn,-- And he shall be Vincentio of Pisa; And make assurance here in Padua Of greater sums than I have promised. So shall you quietly enjoy your hope, And marry sweet Bianca with consent. LUCENTIO: Were it not that my fellow-school-master Doth watch Bianca's steps so narrowly, 'Twere good, methinks, to steal our marriage; Which once perform'd, let all the world say no, I'll keep mine own, despite of all the world. TRANIO: That by degrees we mean to look into, And watch our vantage in this business: We'll over-reach the greybeard, Gremio, The narrow-prying father, Minola, The quaint musician, amorous Licio; All for my master's sake, Lucentio. Signior Gremio, came you from the church? GREMIO: As willingly as e'er I came from school. TRANIO: And is the bride and bridegroom coming home? GREMIO: A bridegroom say you? 'tis a groom indeed, A grumbling groom, and that the girl shall find. TRANIO: Curster than she? why, 'tis impossible. GREMIO: Why he's a devil, a devil, a very fiend. TRANIO: Why, she's a devil, a devil, the devil's dam. GREMIO: Tut, she's a lamb, a dove, a fool to him! I'll tell you, Sir Lucentio: when the priest Should ask, if Katharina should be his wife, 'Ay, by gogs-wouns,' quoth he; and swore so loud, That, all-amazed, the priest let fall the book; And, as he stoop'd again to take it up, The mad-brain'd bridegroom took him such a cuff That down fell priest and book and book and priest: 'Now take them up,' quoth he, 'if any list.' TRANIO: What said the wench when he rose again? GREMIO: Trembled and shook; for why, he stamp'd and swore, As if the vicar meant to cozen him. But after many ceremonies done, He calls for wine: 'A health!' quoth he, as if He had been aboard, carousing to his mates After a storm; quaff'd off the muscadel And threw the sops all in the sexton's face; Having no other reason But that his beard grew thin and hungerly And seem'd to ask him sops as he was drinking. This done, he took the bride about the neck And kiss'd her lips with such a clamorous smack That at the parting all the church did echo: And I seeing this came thence for very shame; And after me, I know, the rout is coming. Such a mad marriage never was before: Hark, hark! I hear the minstrels play. PETRUCHIO: Gentlemen and friends, I thank you for your pains: I know you think to dine with me to-day, And have prepared great store of wedding cheer; But so it is, my haste doth call me hence, And therefore here I mean to take my leave. BAPTISTA: Is't possible you will away to-night? PETRUCHIO: I must away to-day, before night come: Make it no wonder; if you knew my business, You would entreat me rather go than stay. And, honest company, I thank you all, That have beheld me give away myself To this most patient, sweet and virtuous wife: Dine with my father, drink a health to me; For I must hence; and farewell to you all. TRANIO: Let us entreat you stay till after dinner. PETRUCHIO: It may not be. GREMIO: Let me entreat you. PETRUCHIO: It cannot be. KATHARINA: Let me entreat you. PETRUCHIO: I am content. KATHARINA: Are you content to stay? PETRUCHIO: I am content you shall entreat me stay; But yet not stay, entreat me how you can. KATHARINA: Now, if you love me, stay. PETRUCHIO: Grumio, my horse. GRUMIO: Ay, sir, they be ready: the oats have eaten the horses. KATHARINA: Nay, then, Do what thou canst, I will not go to-day; No, nor to-morrow, not till I please myself. The door is open, sir; there lies your way; You may be jogging whiles your boots are green; For me, I'll not be gone till I please myself: 'Tis like you'll prove a jolly surly groom, That take it on you at the first so roundly. PETRUCHIO: O Kate, content thee; prithee, be not angry. KATHARINA: I will be angry: what hast thou to do? Father, be quiet; he shall stay my leisure. GREMIO: Ay, marry, sir, now it begins to work. KATARINA: Gentlemen, forward to the bridal dinner: I see a woman may be made a fool, If she had not a spirit to resist. PETRUCHIO: They shall go forward, Kate, at thy command. Obey the bride, you that attend on her; Go to the feast, revel and domineer, Carouse full measure to her maidenhead, Be mad and merry, or go hang yourselves: But for my bonny Kate, she must with me. Nay, look not big, nor stamp, nor stare, nor fret; I will be master of what is mine own: She is my goods, my chattels; she is my house, My household stuff, my field, my barn, My horse, my ox, my ass, my any thing; And here she stands, touch her whoever dare; I'll bring mine action on the proudest he That stops my way in Padua. Grumio, Draw forth thy weapon, we are beset with thieves; Rescue thy mistress, if thou be a man. Fear not, sweet wench, they shall not touch thee, Kate: I'll buckler thee against a million. BAPTISTA: Nay, let them go, a couple of quiet ones. GREMIO: Went they not quickly, I should die with laughing. TRANIO: Of all mad matches never was the like. LUCENTIO: Mistress, what's your opinion of your sister? BIANCA: That, being mad herself, she's madly mated. GREMIO: I warrant him, Petruchio is Kated. BAPTISTA: Neighbours and friends, though bride and bridegroom wants For to supply the places at the table, You know there wants no junkets at the feast. Lucentio, you shall supply the bridegroom's place: And let Bianca take her sister's room. TRANIO: Shall sweet Bianca practise how to bride it? BAPTISTA: She shall, Lucentio. Come, gentlemen, let's go. GRUMIO: Fie, fie on all tired jades, on all mad masters, and all foul ways! Was ever man so beaten? was ever man so rayed? was ever man so weary? I am sent before to make a fire, and they are coming after to warm them. Now, were not I a little pot and soon hot, my very lips might freeze to my teeth, my tongue to the roof of my mouth, my heart in my belly, ere I should come by a fire to thaw me: but I, with blowing the fire, shall warm myself; for, considering the weather, a taller man than I will take cold. Holla, ho! Curtis. CURTIS: Who is that calls so coldly? GRUMIO: A piece of ice: if thou doubt it, thou mayst slide from my shoulder to my heel with no greater a run but my head and my neck. A fire good Curtis. CURTIS: Is my master and his wife coming, Grumio? GRUMIO: O, ay, Curtis, ay: and therefore fire, fire; cast on no water. CURTIS: Is she so hot a shrew as she's reported? GRUMIO: She was, good Curtis, before this frost: but, thou knowest, winter tames man, woman and beast; for it hath tamed my old master and my new mistress and myself, fellow Curtis. CURTIS: Away, you three-inch fool! I am no beast. GRUMIO: Am I but three inches? why, thy horn is a foot; and so long am I at the least. But wilt thou make a fire, or shall I complain on thee to our mistress, whose hand, she being now at hand, thou shalt soon feel, to thy cold comfort, for being slow in thy hot office? CURTIS: I prithee, good Grumio, tell me, how goes the world? GRUMIO: A cold world, Curtis, in every office but thine; and therefore fire: do thy duty, and have thy duty; for my master and mistress are almost frozen to death. CURTIS: There's fire ready; and therefore, good Grumio, the news. GRUMIO: Why, 'Jack, boy! ho! boy!' and as much news as will thaw. CURTIS: Come, you are so full of cony-catching! GRUMIO: Why, therefore fire; for I have caught extreme cold. Where's the cook? is supper ready, the house trimmed, rushes strewed, cobwebs swept; the serving-men in their new fustian, their white stockings, and every officer his wedding-garment on? Be the jacks fair within, the jills fair without, the carpets laid, and every thing in order? CURTIS: All ready; and therefore, I pray thee, news. GRUMIO: First, know, my horse is tired; my master and mistress fallen out. CURTIS: How? GRUMIO: Out of their saddles into the dirt; and thereby hangs a tale. CURTIS: Let's ha't, good Grumio. GRUMIO: Lend thine ear. CURTIS: Here. GRUMIO: There. CURTIS: This is to feel a tale, not to hear a tale. GRUMIO: And therefore 'tis called a sensible tale: and this cuff was but to knock at your ear, and beseech listening. Now I begin: Imprimis, we came down a foul hill, my master riding behind my mistress,-- CURTIS: Both of one horse? GRUMIO: What's that to thee? CURTIS: Why, a horse. GRUMIO: Tell thou the tale: but hadst thou not crossed me, thou shouldst have heard how her horse fell and she under her horse; thou shouldst have heard in how miry a place, how she was bemoiled, how he left her with the horse upon her, how he beat me because her horse stumbled, how she waded through the dirt to pluck him off me, how he swore, how she prayed, that never prayed before, how I cried, how the horses ran away, how her bridle was burst, how I lost my crupper, with many things of worthy memory, which now shall die in oblivion and thou return unexperienced to thy grave. CURTIS: By this reckoning he is more shrew than she. GRUMIO: Ay; and that thou and the proudest of you all shall find when he comes home. But what talk I of this? Call forth Nathaniel, Joseph, Nicholas, Philip, Walter, Sugarsop and the rest: let their heads be sleekly combed their blue coats brushed and their garters of an indifferent knit: let them curtsy with their left legs and not presume to touch a hair of my master's horse-tail till they kiss their hands. Are they all ready? CURTIS: They are. GRUMIO: Call them forth. CURTIS: Do you hear, ho? you must meet my master to countenance my mistress. GRUMIO: Why, she hath a face of her own. CURTIS: Who knows not that? GRUMIO: Thou, it seems, that calls for company to countenance her. CURTIS: I call them forth to credit her. GRUMIO: Why, she comes to borrow nothing of them. NATHANIEL: Welcome home, Grumio! PHILIP: How now, Grumio! JOSEPH: What, Grumio! NICHOLAS: Fellow Grumio! NATHANIEL: How now, old lad? GRUMIO: Welcome, you;--how now, you;-- what, you;--fellow, you;--and thus much for greeting. Now, my spruce companions, is all ready, and all things neat? NATHANIEL: All things is ready. How near is our master? GRUMIO: E'en at hand, alighted by this; and therefore be not--Cock's passion, silence! I hear my master. PETRUCHIO: Where be these knaves? What, no man at door To hold my stirrup nor to take my horse! Where is Nathaniel, Gregory, Philip? ALL SERVING-MEN: Here, here, sir; here, sir. PETRUCHIO: Here, sir! here, sir! here, sir! here, sir! You logger-headed and unpolish'd grooms! What, no attendance? no regard? no duty? Where is the foolish knave I sent before? GRUMIO: Here, sir; as foolish as I was before. PETRUCHIO: You peasant swain! you whoreson malt-horse drudge! Did I not bid thee meet me in the park, And bring along these rascal knaves with thee? GRUMIO: Nathaniel's coat, sir, was not fully made, And Gabriel's pumps were all unpink'd i' the heel; There was no link to colour Peter's hat, And Walter's dagger was not come from sheathing: There were none fine but Adam, Ralph, and Gregory; The rest were ragged, old, and beggarly; Yet, as they are, here are they come to meet you. PETRUCHIO: Go, rascals, go, and fetch my supper in. Where is the life that late I led-- Where are those--Sit down, Kate, and welcome.-- Sound, sound, sound, sound! Why, when, I say? Nay, good sweet Kate, be merry. Off with my boots, you rogues! you villains, when? It was the friar of orders grey, As he forth walked on his way:-- Out, you rogue! you pluck my foot awry: Take that, and mend the plucking off the other. Be merry, Kate. Some water, here; what, ho! Where's my spaniel Troilus? Sirrah, get you hence, And bid my cousin Ferdinand come hither: One, Kate, that you must kiss, and be acquainted with. Where are my slippers? Shall I have some water? Come, Kate, and wash, and welcome heartily. You whoreson villain! will you let it fall? KATHARINA: Patience, I pray you; 'twas a fault unwilling. PETRUCHIO: A whoreson beetle-headed, flap-ear'd knave! Come, Kate, sit down; I know you have a stomach. Will you give thanks, sweet Kate; or else shall I? What's this? mutton? First Servant: Ay. PETRUCHIO: Who brought it? PETER: I. PETRUCHIO: 'Tis burnt; and so is all the meat. What dogs are these! Where is the rascal cook? How durst you, villains, bring it from the dresser, And serve it thus to me that love it not? Theretake it to you, trenchers, cups, and all; You heedless joltheads and unmanner'd slaves! What, do you grumble? I'll be with you straight. KATHARINA: I pray you, husband, be not so disquiet: The meat was well, if you were so contented. PETRUCHIO: I tell thee, Kate, 'twas burnt and dried away; And I expressly am forbid to touch it, For it engenders choler, planteth anger; And better 'twere that both of us did fast, Since, of ourselves, ourselves are choleric, Than feed it with such over-roasted flesh. Be patient; to-morrow 't shall be mended, And, for this night, we'll fast for company: Come, I will bring thee to thy bridal chamber. NATHANIEL: Peter, didst ever see the like? PETER: He kills her in her own humour. GRUMIO: Where is he? CURTIS: In her chamber, making a sermon of continency to her; And rails, and swears, and rates, that she, poor soul, Knows not which way to stand, to look, to speak, And sits as one new-risen from a dream. Away, away! for he is coming hither. PETRUCHIO: Thus have I politicly begun my reign, And 'tis my hope to end successfully. My falcon now is sharp and passing empty; And till she stoop she must not be full-gorged, For then she never looks upon her lure. Another way I have to man my haggard, To make her come and know her keeper's call, That is, to watch her, as we watch these kites That bate and beat and will not be obedient. She eat no meat to-day, nor none shall eat; Last night she slept not, nor to-night she shall not; As with the meat, some undeserved fault I'll find about the making of the bed; And here I'll fling the pillow, there the bolster, This way the coverlet, another way the sheets: Ay, and amid this hurly I intend That all is done in reverend care of her; And in conclusion she shall watch all night: And if she chance to nod I'll rail and brawl And with the clamour keep her still awake. This is a way to kill a wife with kindness; And thus I'll curb her mad and headstrong humour. He that knows better how to tame a shrew, Now let him speak: 'tis charity to show. TRANIO: Is't possible, friend Licio, that Mistress Bianca Doth fancy any other but Lucentio? I tell you, sir, she bears me fair in hand. HORTENSIO: Sir, to satisfy you in what I have said, Stand by and mark the manner of his teaching. LUCENTIO: Now, mistress, profit you in what you read? BIANCA: What, master, read you? first resolve me that. LUCENTIO: I read that I profess, the Art to Love. BIANCA: And may you prove, sir, master of your art! LUCENTIO: While you, sweet dear, prove mistress of my heart! HORTENSIO: Quick proceeders, marry! Now, tell me, I pray, You that durst swear at your mistress Bianca Loved none in the world so well as Lucentio. TRANIO: O despiteful love! unconstant womankind! I tell thee, Licio, this is wonderful. HORTENSIO: Mistake no more: I am not Licio, Nor a musician, as I seem to be; But one that scorn to live in this disguise, For such a one as leaves a gentleman, And makes a god of such a cullion: Know, sir, that I am call'd Hortensio. TRANIO: Signior Hortensio, I have often heard Of your entire affection to Bianca; And since mine eyes are witness of her lightness, I will with you, if you be so contented, Forswear Bianca and her love for ever. HORTENSIO: See, how they kiss and court! Signior Lucentio, Here is my hand, and here I firmly vow Never to woo her no more, but do forswear her, As one unworthy all the former favours That I have fondly flatter'd her withal. TRANIO: And here I take the unfeigned oath, Never to marry with her though she would entreat: Fie on her! see, how beastly she doth court him! HORTENSIO: Would all the world but he had quite forsworn! For me, that I may surely keep mine oath, I will be married to a wealthy widow, Ere three days pass, which hath as long loved me As I have loved this proud disdainful haggard. And so farewell, Signior Lucentio. Kindness in women, not their beauteous looks, Shall win my love: and so I take my leave, In resolution as I swore before. TRANIO: Mistress Bianca, bless you with such grace As 'longeth to a lover's blessed case! Nay, I have ta'en you napping, gentle love, And have forsworn you with Hortensio. BIANCA: Tranio, you jest: but have you both forsworn me? TRANIO: Mistress, we have. LUCENTIO: Then we are rid of Licio. TRANIO: I' faith, he'll have a lusty widow now, That shall be wood and wedded in a day. BIANCA: God give him joy! TRANIO: Ay, and he'll tame her. BIANCA: He says so, Tranio. TRANIO: Faith, he is gone unto the taming-school. BIANCA: The taming-school! what, is there such a place? TRANIO: Ay, mistress, and Petruchio is the master; That teacheth tricks eleven and twenty long, To tame a shrew and charm her chattering tongue. BIONDELLO: O master, master, I have watch'd so long That I am dog-weary: but at last I spied An ancient angel coming down the hill, Will serve the turn. TRANIO: What is he, Biondello? BIONDELLO: Master, a mercatante, or a pedant, I know not what; but format in apparel, In gait and countenance surely like a father. LUCENTIO: And what of him, Tranio? TRANIO: If he be credulous and trust my tale, I'll make him glad to seem Vincentio, And give assurance to Baptista Minola, As if he were the right Vincentio Take in your love, and then let me alone. Pedant: God save you, sir! TRANIO: And you, sir! you are welcome. Travel you far on, or are you at the farthest? Pedant: Sir, at the farthest for a week or two: But then up farther, and as for as Rome; And so to Tripoli, if God lend me life. TRANIO: What countryman, I pray? Pedant: Of Mantua. TRANIO: Of Mantua, sir? marry, God forbid! And come to Padua, careless of your life? Pedant: My life, sir! how, I pray? for that goes hard. TRANIO: 'Tis death for any one in Mantua To come to Padua. Know you not the cause? Your ships are stay'd at Venice, and the duke, For private quarrel 'twixt your duke and him, Hath publish'd and proclaim'd it openly: 'Tis, marvel, but that you are but newly come, You might have heard it else proclaim'd about. Pedant: Alas! sir, it is worse for me than so; For I have bills for money by exchange From Florence and must here deliver them. TRANIO: Well, sir, to do you courtesy, This will I do, and this I will advise you: First, tell me, have you ever been at Pisa? Pedant: Ay, sir, in Pisa have I often been, Pisa renowned for grave citizens. TRANIO: Among them know you one Vincentio? Pedant: I know him not, but I have heard of him; A merchant of incomparable wealth. TRANIO: He is my father, sir; and, sooth to say, In countenance somewhat doth resemble you. BIONDELLO: TRANIO: To save your life in this extremity, This favour will I do you for his sake; And think it not the worst of an your fortunes That you are like to Sir Vincentio. His name and credit shall you undertake, And in my house you shall be friendly lodged: Look that you take upon you as you should; You understand me, sir: so shall you stay Till you have done your business in the city: If this be courtesy, sir, accept of it. Pedant: O sir, I do; and will repute you ever The patron of my life and liberty. TRANIO: Then go with me to make the matter good. This, by the way, I let you understand; my father is here look'd for every day, To pass assurance of a dower in marriage 'Twixt me and one Baptista's daughter here: In all these circumstances I'll instruct you: Go with me to clothe you as becomes you. GRUMIO: No, no, forsooth; I dare not for my life. KATHARINA: The more my wrong, the more his spite appears: What, did he marry me to famish me? Beggars, that come unto my father's door, Upon entreaty have a present aims; If not, elsewhere they meet with charity: But I, who never knew how to entreat, Nor never needed that I should entreat, Am starved for meat, giddy for lack of sleep, With oath kept waking and with brawling fed: And that which spites me more than all these wants, He does it under name of perfect love; As who should say, if I should sleep or eat, 'Twere deadly sickness or else present death. I prithee go and get me some repast; I care not what, so it be wholesome food. GRUMIO: What say you to a neat's foot? KATHARINA: 'Tis passing good: I prithee let me have it. GRUMIO: I fear it is too choleric a meat. How say you to a fat tripe finely broil'd? KATHARINA: I like it well: good Grumio, fetch it me. GRUMIO: I cannot tell; I fear 'tis choleric. What say you to a piece of beef and mustard? KATHARINA: A dish that I do love to feed upon. GRUMIO: Ay, but the mustard is too hot a little. KATHARINA: Why then, the beef, and let the mustard rest. GRUMIO: Nay then, I will not: you shall have the mustard, Or else you get no beef of Grumio. KATHARINA: Then both, or one, or any thing thou wilt. GRUMIO: Why then, the mustard without the beef. KATHARINA: Go, get thee gone, thou false deluding slave, That feed'st me with the very name of meat: Sorrow on thee and all the pack of you, That triumph thus upon my misery! Go, get thee gone, I say. PETRUCHIO: How fares my Kate? What, sweeting, all amort? HORTENSIO: Mistress, what cheer? KATHARINA: Faith, as cold as can be. PETRUCHIO: Pluck up thy spirits; look cheerfully upon me. Here love; thou see'st how diligent I am To dress thy meat myself and bring it thee: I am sure, sweet Kate, this kindness merits thanks. What, not a word? Nay, then thou lovest it not; And all my pains is sorted to no proof. Here, take away this dish. KATHARINA: I pray you, let it stand. PETRUCHIO: The poorest service is repaid with thanks; And so shall mine, before you touch the meat. KATHARINA: I thank you, sir. HORTENSIO: Signior Petruchio, fie! you are to blame. Come, mistress Kate, I'll bear you company. PETRUCHIO: Haberdasher: Here is the cap your worship did bespeak. PETRUCHIO: Why, this was moulded on a porringer; A velvet dish: fie, fie! 'tis lewd and filthy: Why, 'tis a cockle or a walnut-shell, A knack, a toy, a trick, a baby's cap: Away with it! come, let me have a bigger. KATHARINA: I'll have no bigger: this doth fit the time, And gentlewomen wear such caps as these PETRUCHIO: When you are gentle, you shall have one too, And not till then. HORTENSIO: KATHARINA: Why, sir, I trust I may have leave to speak; And speak I will; I am no child, no babe: Your betters have endured me say my mind, And if you cannot, best you stop your ears. My tongue will tell the anger of my heart, Or else my heart concealing it will break, And rather than it shall, I will be free Even to the uttermost, as I please, in words. PETRUCHIO: Why, thou say'st true; it is a paltry cap, A custard-coffin, a bauble, a silken pie: I love thee well, in that thou likest it not. KATHARINA: Love me or love me not, I like the cap; And it I will have, or I will have none. PETRUCHIO: Thy gown? why, ay: come, tailor, let us see't. O mercy, God! what masquing stuff is here? What's this? a sleeve? 'tis like a demi-cannon: What, up and down, carved like an apple-tart? Here's snip and nip and cut and slish and slash, Like to a censer in a barber's shop: Why, what, i' devil's name, tailor, call'st thou this? HORTENSIO: Tailor: You bid me make it orderly and well, According to the fashion and the time. PETRUCHIO: Marry, and did; but if you be remember'd, I did not bid you mar it to the time. Go, hop me over every kennel home, For you shall hop without my custom, sir: I'll none of it: hence! make your best of it. KATHARINA: I never saw a better-fashion'd gown, More quaint, more pleasing, nor more commendable: Belike you mean to make a puppet of me. PETRUCHIO: Why, true; he means to make a puppet of thee. Tailor: She says your worship means to make a puppet of her. PETRUCHIO: O monstrous arrogance! Thou liest, thou thread, thou thimble, Thou yard, three-quarters, half-yard, quarter, nail! Thou flea, thou nit, thou winter-cricket thou! Braved in mine own house with a skein of thread? Away, thou rag, thou quantity, thou remnant; Or I shall so be-mete thee with thy yard As thou shalt think on prating whilst thou livest! I tell thee, I, that thou hast marr'd her gown. Tailor: Your worship is deceived; the gown is made Just as my master had direction: Grumio gave order how it should be done. GRUMIO: I gave him no order; I gave him the stuff. Tailor: But how did you desire it should be made? GRUMIO: Marry, sir, with needle and thread. Tailor: But did you not request to have it cut? GRUMIO: Thou hast faced many things. Tailor: I have. GRUMIO: Face not me: thou hast braved many men; brave not me; I will neither be faced nor braved. I say unto thee, I bid thy master cut out the gown; but I did not bid him cut it to pieces: ergo, thou liest. Tailor: Why, here is the note of the fashion to testify PETRUCHIO: Read it. GRUMIO: The note lies in's throat, if he say I said so. Tailor: GRUMIO: Master, if ever I said loose-bodied gown, sew me in the skirts of it, and beat me to death with a bottom of brown thread: I said a gown. PETRUCHIO: Proceed. Tailor: GRUMIO: I confess the cape. Tailor: GRUMIO: I confess two sleeves. Tailor: PETRUCHIO: Ay, there's the villany. GRUMIO: Error i' the bill, sir; error i' the bill. I commanded the sleeves should be cut out and sewed up again; and that I'll prove upon thee, though thy little finger be armed in a thimble. Tailor: This is true that I say: an I had thee in place where, thou shouldst know it. GRUMIO: I am for thee straight: take thou the bill, give me thy mete-yard, and spare not me. HORTENSIO: God-a-mercy, Grumio! then he shall have no odds. PETRUCHIO: Well, sir, in brief, the gown is not for me. GRUMIO: You are i' the right, sir: 'tis for my mistress. PETRUCHIO: Go, take it up unto thy master's use. GRUMIO: Villain, not for thy life: take up my mistress' gown for thy master's use! PETRUCHIO: Why, sir, what's your conceit in that? GRUMIO: O, sir, the conceit is deeper than you think for: Take up my mistress' gown to his master's use! O, fie, fie, fie! PETRUCHIO: HORTENSIO: Tailor, I'll pay thee for thy gown tomorrow: Take no unkindness of his hasty words: Away! I say; commend me to thy master. PETRUCHIO: Well, come, my Kate; we will unto your father's Even in these honest mean habiliments: Our purses shall be proud, our garments poor; For 'tis the mind that makes the body rich; And as the sun breaks through the darkest clouds, So honour peereth in the meanest habit. What is the jay more precious than the lark, Because his fathers are more beautiful? Or is the adder better than the eel, Because his painted skin contents the eye? O, no, good Kate; neither art thou the worse For this poor furniture and mean array. if thou account'st it shame. lay it on me; And therefore frolic: we will hence forthwith, To feast and sport us at thy father's house. Go, call my men, and let us straight to him; And bring our horses unto Long-lane end; There will we mount, and thither walk on foot Let's see; I think 'tis now some seven o'clock, And well we may come there by dinner-time. KATHARINA: I dare assure you, sir, 'tis almost two; And 'twill be supper-time ere you come there. PETRUCHIO: It shall be seven ere I go to horse: Look, what I speak, or do, or think to do, You are still crossing it. Sirs, let't alone: I will not go to-day; and ere I do, It shall be what o'clock I say it is. HORTENSIO: TRANIO: Sir, this is the house: please it you that I call? Pedant: Ay, what else? and but I be deceived Signior Baptista may remember me, Near twenty years ago, in Genoa, Where we were lodgers at the Pegasus. TRANIO: 'Tis well; and hold your own, in any case, With such austerity as 'longeth to a father. Pedant: I warrant you. But, sir, here comes your boy; 'Twere good he were school'd. TRANIO: Fear you not him. Sirrah Biondello, Now do your duty throughly, I advise you: Imagine 'twere the right Vincentio. BIONDELLO: Tut, fear not me. TRANIO: But hast thou done thy errand to Baptista? BIONDELLO: I told him that your father was at Venice, And that you look'd for him this day in Padua. TRANIO: Thou'rt a tall fellow: hold thee that to drink. Here comes Baptista: set your countenance, sir. Signior Baptista, you are happily met. Sir, this is the gentleman I told you of: I pray you stand good father to me now, Give me Bianca for my patrimony. Pedant: Soft son! Sir, by your leave: having come to Padua To gather in some debts, my son Lucentio Made me acquainted with a weighty cause Of love between your daughter and himself: And, for the good report I hear of you And for the love he beareth to your daughter And she to him, to stay him not too long, I am content, in a good father's care, To have him match'd; and if you please to like No worse than I, upon some agreement Me shall you find ready and willing With one consent to have her so bestow'd; For curious I cannot be with you, Signior Baptista, of whom I hear so well. BAPTISTA: Sir, pardon me in what I have to say: Your plainness and your shortness please me well. Right true it is, your son Lucentio here Doth love my daughter and she loveth him, Or both dissemble deeply their affections: And therefore, if you say no more than this, That like a father you will deal with him And pass my daughter a sufficient dower, The match is made, and all is done: Your son shall have my daughter with consent. TRANIO: I thank you, sir. Where then do you know best We be affied and such assurance ta'en As shall with either part's agreement stand? BAPTISTA: Not in my house, Lucentio; for, you know, Pitchers have ears, and I have many servants: Besides, old Gremio is hearkening still; And happily we might be interrupted. TRANIO: Then at my lodging, an it like you: There doth my father lie; and there, this night, We'll pass the business privately and well. Send for your daughter by your servant here: My boy shall fetch the scrivener presently. The worst is this, that, at so slender warning, You are like to have a thin and slender pittance. BAPTISTA: It likes me well. Biondello, hie you home, And bid Bianca make her ready straight; And, if you will, tell what hath happened, Lucentio's father is arrived in Padua, And how she's like to be Lucentio's wife. BIONDELLO: I pray the gods she may with all my heart! TRANIO: Dally not with the gods, but get thee gone. Signior Baptista, shall I lead the way? Welcome! one mess is like to be your cheer: Come, sir; we will better it in Pisa. BAPTISTA: I follow you. BIONDELLO: Cambio! LUCENTIO: What sayest thou, Biondello? BIONDELLO: You saw my master wink and laugh upon you? LUCENTIO: Biondello, what of that? BIONDELLO: Faith, nothing; but has left me here behind, to expound the meaning or moral of his signs and tokens. LUCENTIO: I pray thee, moralize them. BIONDELLO: Then thus. Baptista is safe, talking with the deceiving father of a deceitful son. LUCENTIO: And what of him? BIONDELLO: His daughter is to be brought by you to the supper. LUCENTIO: And then? BIONDELLO: The old priest of Saint Luke's church is at your command at all hours. LUCENTIO: And what of all this? BIONDELLO: I cannot tell; expect they are busied about a counterfeit assurance: take you assurance of her, 'cum privilegio ad imprimendum solum:' to the church; take the priest, clerk, and some sufficient honest witnesses: If this be not that you look for, I have no more to say, But bid Bianca farewell for ever and a day. LUCENTIO: Hearest thou, Biondello? BIONDELLO: I cannot tarry: I knew a wench married in an afternoon as she went to the garden for parsley to stuff a rabbit; and so may you, sir: and so, adieu, sir. My master hath appointed me to go to Saint Luke's, to bid the priest be ready to come against you come with your appendix. LUCENTIO: I may, and will, if she be so contented: She will be pleased; then wherefore should I doubt? Hap what hap may, I'll roundly go about her: It shall go hard if Cambio go without her. PETRUCHIO: Come on, i' God's name; once more toward our father's. Good Lord, how bright and goodly shines the moon! KATHARINA: The moon! the sun: it is not moonlight now. PETRUCHIO: I say it is the moon that shines so bright. KATHARINA: I know it is the sun that shines so bright. PETRUCHIO: Now, by my mother's son, and that's myself, It shall be moon, or star, or what I list, Or ere I journey to your father's house. Go on, and fetch our horses back again. Evermore cross'd and cross'd; nothing but cross'd! HORTENSIO: Say as he says, or we shall never go. KATHARINA: Forward, I pray, since we have come so far, And be it moon, or sun, or what you please: An if you please to call it a rush-candle, Henceforth I vow it shall be so for me. PETRUCHIO: I say it is the moon. KATHARINA: I know it is the moon. PETRUCHIO: Nay, then you lie: it is the blessed sun. KATHARINA: Then, God be bless'd, it is the blessed sun: But sun it is not, when you say it is not; And the moon changes even as your mind. What you will have it named, even that it is; And so it shall be so for Katharina. HORTENSIO: Petruchio, go thy ways; the field is won. PETRUCHIO: Well, forward, forward! thus the bowl should run, And not unluckily against the bias. But, soft! company is coming here. Good morrow, gentle mistress: where away? Tell me, sweet Kate, and tell me truly too, Hast thou beheld a fresher gentlewoman? Such war of white and red within her cheeks! What stars do spangle heaven with such beauty, As those two eyes become that heavenly face? Fair lovely maid, once more good day to thee. Sweet Kate, embrace her for her beauty's sake. HORTENSIO: A' will make the man mad, to make a woman of him. KATHARINA: Young budding virgin, fair and fresh and sweet, Whither away, or where is thy abode? Happy the parents of so fair a child; Happier the man, whom favourable stars Allot thee for his lovely bed-fellow! PETRUCHIO: Why, how now, Kate! I hope thou art not mad: This is a man, old, wrinkled, faded, wither'd, And not a maiden, as thou say'st he is. KATHARINA: Pardon, old father, my mistaking eyes, That have been so bedazzled with the sun That everything I look on seemeth green: Now I perceive thou art a reverend father; Pardon, I pray thee, for my mad mistaking. PETRUCHIO: Do, good old grandsire; and withal make known Which way thou travellest: if along with us, We shall be joyful of thy company. VINCENTIO: Fair sir, and you my merry mistress, That with your strange encounter much amazed me, My name is call'd Vincentio; my dwelling Pisa; And bound I am to Padua; there to visit A son of mine, which long I have not seen. PETRUCHIO: What is his name? VINCENTIO: Lucentio, gentle sir. PETRUCHIO: Happily we met; the happier for thy son. And now by law, as well as reverend age, I may entitle thee my loving father: The sister to my wife, this gentlewoman, Thy son by this hath married. Wonder not, Nor be grieved: she is of good esteem, Her dowery wealthy, and of worthy birth; Beside, so qualified as may beseem The spouse of any noble gentleman. Let me embrace with old Vincentio, And wander we to see thy honest son, Who will of thy arrival be full joyous. VINCENTIO: But is it true? or else is it your pleasure, Like pleasant travellers, to break a jest Upon the company you overtake? HORTENSIO: I do assure thee, father, so it is. PETRUCHIO: Come, go along, and see the truth hereof; For our first merriment hath made thee jealous. HORTENSIO: Well, Petruchio, this has put me in heart. Have to my widow! and if she be froward, Then hast thou taught Hortensio to be untoward. BIONDELLO: Softly and swiftly, sir; for the priest is ready. LUCENTIO: I fly, Biondello: but they may chance to need thee at home; therefore leave us. BIONDELLO: Nay, faith, I'll see the church o' your back; and then come back to my master's as soon as I can. GREMIO: I marvel Cambio comes not all this while. PETRUCHIO: Sir, here's the door, this is Lucentio's house: My father's bears more toward the market-place; Thither must I, and here I leave you, sir. VINCENTIO: You shall not choose but drink before you go: I think I shall command your welcome here, And, by all likelihood, some cheer is toward. GREMIO: They're busy within; you were best knock louder. Pedant: What's he that knocks as he would beat down the gate? VINCENTIO: Is Signior Lucentio within, sir? Pedant: He's within, sir, but not to be spoken withal. VINCENTIO: What if a man bring him a hundred pound or two, to make merry withal? Pedant: Keep your hundred pounds to yourself: he shall need none, so long as I live. PETRUCHIO: Nay, I told you your son was well beloved in Padua. Do you hear, sir? To leave frivolous circumstances, I pray you, tell Signior Lucentio that his father is come from Pisa, and is here at the door to speak with him. Pedant: Thou liest: his father is come from Padua and here looking out at the window. VINCENTIO: Art thou his father? Pedant: Ay, sir; so his mother says, if I may believe her. PETRUCHIO: Pedant: Lay hands on the villain: I believe a' means to cozen somebody in this city under my countenance. BIONDELLO: I have seen them in the church together: God send 'em good shipping! But who is here? mine old master Vincentio! now we are undone and brought to nothing. VINCENTIO: BIONDELLO: Hope I may choose, sir. VINCENTIO: Come hither, you rogue. What, have you forgot me? BIONDELLO: Forgot you! no, sir: I could not forget you, for I never saw you before in all my life. VINCENTIO: What, you notorious villain, didst thou never see thy master's father, Vincentio? BIONDELLO: What, my old worshipful old master? yes, marry, sir: see where he looks out of the window. VINCENTIO: Is't so, indeed. BIONDELLO: Help, help, help! here's a madman will murder me. Pedant: Help, son! help, Signior Baptista! PETRUCHIO: Prithee, Kate, let's stand aside and see the end of this controversy. TRANIO: Sir, what are you that offer to beat my servant? VINCENTIO: What am I, sir! nay, what are you, sir? O immortal gods! O fine villain! A silken doublet! a velvet hose! a scarlet cloak! and a copatain hat! O, I am undone! I am undone! while I play the good husband at home, my son and my servant spend all at the university. TRANIO: How now! what's the matter? BAPTISTA: What, is the man lunatic? TRANIO: Sir, you seem a sober ancient gentleman by your habit, but your words show you a madman. Why, sir, what 'cerns it you if I wear pearl and gold? I thank my good father, I am able to maintain it. VINCENTIO: Thy father! O villain! he is a sailmaker in Bergamo. BAPTISTA: You mistake, sir, you mistake, sir. Pray, what do you think is his name? VINCENTIO: His name! as if I knew not his name: I have brought him up ever since he was three years old, and his name is Tranio. Pedant: Away, away, mad ass! his name is Lucentio and he is mine only son, and heir to the lands of me, Signior Vincentio. VINCENTIO: Lucentio! O, he hath murdered his master! Lay hold on him, I charge you, in the duke's name. O, my son, my son! Tell me, thou villain, where is my son Lucentio? TRANIO: Call forth an officer. Carry this mad knave to the gaol. Father Baptista, I charge you see that he be forthcoming. VINCENTIO: Carry me to the gaol! GREMIO: Stay, officer: he shall not go to prison. BAPTISTA: Talk not, Signior Gremio: I say he shall go to prison. GREMIO: Take heed, Signior Baptista, lest you be cony-catched in this business: I dare swear this is the right Vincentio. Pedant: Swear, if thou darest. GREMIO: Nay, I dare not swear it. TRANIO: Then thou wert best say that I am not Lucentio. GREMIO: Yes, I know thee to be Signior Lucentio. BAPTISTA: Away with the dotard! to the gaol with him! VINCENTIO: Thus strangers may be hailed and abused: O monstrous villain! BIONDELLO: O! we are spoiled and--yonder he is: deny him, forswear him, or else we are all undone. LUCENTIO: VINCENTIO: Lives my sweet son? BIANCA: Pardon, dear father. BAPTISTA: How hast thou offended? Where is Lucentio? LUCENTIO: Here's Lucentio, Right son to the right Vincentio; That have by marriage made thy daughter mine, While counterfeit supposes bleared thine eyne. GREMIO: Here's packing, with a witness to deceive us all! VINCENTIO: Where is that damned villain Tranio, That faced and braved me in this matter so? BAPTISTA: Why, tell me, is not this my Cambio? BIANCA: Cambio is changed into Lucentio. LUCENTIO: Love wrought these miracles. Bianca's love Made me exchange my state with Tranio, While he did bear my countenance in the town; And happily I have arrived at the last Unto the wished haven of my bliss. What Tranio did, myself enforced him to; Then pardon him, sweet father, for my sake. VINCENTIO: I'll slit the villain's nose, that would have sent me to the gaol. BAPTISTA: But do you hear, sir? have you married my daughter without asking my good will? VINCENTIO: Fear not, Baptista; we will content you, go to: but I will in, to be revenged for this villany. BAPTISTA: And I, to sound the depth of this knavery. LUCENTIO: Look not pale, Bianca; thy father will not frown. GREMIO: My cake is dough; but I'll in among the rest, Out of hope of all, but my share of the feast. KATHARINA: Husband, let's follow, to see the end of this ado. PETRUCHIO: First kiss me, Kate, and we will. KATHARINA: What, in the midst of the street? PETRUCHIO: What, art thou ashamed of me? KATHARINA: No, sir, God forbid; but ashamed to kiss. PETRUCHIO: Why, then let's home again. Come, sirrah, let's away. KATHARINA: Nay, I will give thee a kiss: now pray thee, love, stay. PETRUCHIO: Is not this well? Come, my sweet Kate: Better once than never, for never too late. LUCENTIO: At last, though long, our jarring notes agree: And time it is, when raging war is done, To smile at scapes and perils overblown. My fair Bianca, bid my father welcome, While I with self-same kindness welcome thine. Brother Petruchio, sister Katharina, And thou, Hortensio, with thy loving widow, Feast with the best, and welcome to my house: My banquet is to close our stomachs up, After our great good cheer. Pray you, sit down; For now we sit to chat as well as eat. PETRUCHIO: Nothing but sit and sit, and eat and eat! BAPTISTA: Padua affords this kindness, son Petruchio. PETRUCHIO: Padua affords nothing but what is kind. HORTENSIO: For both our sakes, I would that word were true. PETRUCHIO: Now, for my life, Hortensio fears his widow. Widow: Then never trust me, if I be afeard. PETRUCHIO: You are very sensible, and yet you miss my sense: I mean, Hortensio is afeard of you. Widow: He that is giddy thinks the world turns round. PETRUCHIO: Roundly replied. KATHARINA: Mistress, how mean you that? Widow: Thus I conceive by him. PETRUCHIO: Conceives by me! How likes Hortensio that? HORTENSIO: My widow says, thus she conceives her tale. PETRUCHIO: Very well mended. Kiss him for that, good widow. KATHARINA: 'He that is giddy thinks the world turns round:' I pray you, tell me what you meant by that. Widow: Your husband, being troubled with a shrew, Measures my husband's sorrow by his woe: And now you know my meaning, KATHARINA: A very mean meaning. Widow: Right, I mean you. KATHARINA: And I am mean indeed, respecting you. PETRUCHIO: To her, Kate! HORTENSIO: To her, widow! PETRUCHIO: A hundred marks, my Kate does put her down. HORTENSIO: That's my office. PETRUCHIO: Spoke like an officer; ha' to thee, lad! BAPTISTA: How likes Gremio these quick-witted folks? GREMIO: Believe me, sir, they butt together well. BIANCA: Head, and butt! an hasty-witted body Would say your head and butt were head and horn. VINCENTIO: Ay, mistress bride, hath that awaken'd you? BIANCA: Ay, but not frighted me; therefore I'll sleep again. PETRUCHIO: Nay, that you shall not: since you have begun, Have at you for a bitter jest or two! BIANCA: Am I your bird? I mean to shift my bush; And then pursue me as you draw your bow. You are welcome all. PETRUCHIO: She hath prevented me. Here, Signior Tranio. This bird you aim'd at, though you hit her not; Therefore a health to all that shot and miss'd. TRANIO: O, sir, Lucentio slipp'd me like his greyhound, Which runs himself and catches for his master. PETRUCHIO: A good swift simile, but something currish. TRANIO: 'Tis well, sir, that you hunted for yourself: 'Tis thought your deer does hold you at a bay. BAPTISTA: O ho, Petruchio! Tranio hits you now. LUCENTIO: I thank thee for that gird, good Tranio. HORTENSIO: Confess, confess, hath he not hit you here? PETRUCHIO: A' has a little gall'd me, I confess; And, as the jest did glance away from me, 'Tis ten to one it maim'd you two outright. BAPTISTA: Now, in good sadness, son Petruchio, I think thou hast the veriest shrew of all. PETRUCHIO: Well, I say no: and therefore for assurance Let's each one send unto his wife; And he whose wife is most obedient To come at first when he doth send for her, Shall win the wager which we will propose. HORTENSIO: Content. What is the wager? LUCENTIO: Twenty crowns. PETRUCHIO: Twenty crowns! I'll venture so much of my hawk or hound, But twenty times so much upon my wife. LUCENTIO: A hundred then. HORTENSIO: Content. PETRUCHIO: A match! 'tis done. HORTENSIO: Who shall begin? LUCENTIO: That will I. Go, Biondello, bid your mistress come to me. BIONDELLO: I go. BAPTISTA: Son, I'll be your half, Bianca comes. LUCENTIO: I'll have no halves; I'll bear it all myself. How now! what news? BIONDELLO: Sir, my mistress sends you word That she is busy and she cannot come. PETRUCHIO: How! she is busy and she cannot come! Is that an answer? GREMIO: Ay, and a kind one too: Pray God, sir, your wife send you not a worse. PETRUCHIO: I hope better. HORTENSIO: Sirrah Biondello, go and entreat my wife To come to me forthwith. PETRUCHIO: O, ho! entreat her! Nay, then she must needs come. HORTENSIO: I am afraid, sir, Do what you can, yours will not be entreated. Now, where's my wife? BIONDELLO: She says you have some goodly jest in hand: She will not come: she bids you come to her. PETRUCHIO: Worse and worse; she will not come! O vile, Intolerable, not to be endured! Sirrah Grumio, go to your mistress; Say, I command her to come to me. HORTENSIO: I know her answer. PETRUCHIO: What? HORTENSIO: She will not. PETRUCHIO: The fouler fortune mine, and there an end. BAPTISTA: Now, by my holidame, here comes Katharina! KATHARINA: What is your will, sir, that you send for me? PETRUCHIO: Where is your sister, and Hortensio's wife? KATHARINA: They sit conferring by the parlor fire. PETRUCHIO: Go fetch them hither: if they deny to come. Swinge me them soundly forth unto their husbands: Away, I say, and bring them hither straight. LUCENTIO: Here is a wonder, if you talk of a wonder. HORTENSIO: And so it is: I wonder what it bodes. PETRUCHIO: Marry, peace it bodes, and love and quiet life, And awful rule and right supremacy; And, to be short, what not, that's sweet and happy? BAPTISTA: Now, fair befal thee, good Petruchio! The wager thou hast won; and I will add Unto their losses twenty thousand crowns; Another dowry to another daughter, For she is changed, as she had never been. PETRUCHIO: Nay, I will win my wager better yet And show more sign of her obedience, Her new-built virtue and obedience. See where she comes and brings your froward wives As prisoners to her womanly persuasion. Katharina, that cap of yours becomes you not: Off with that bauble, throw it under-foot. Widow: Lord, let me never have a cause to sigh, Till I be brought to such a silly pass! BIANCA: Fie! what a foolish duty call you this? LUCENTIO: I would your duty were as foolish too: The wisdom of your duty, fair Bianca, Hath cost me an hundred crowns since supper-time. BIANCA: The more fool you, for laying on my duty. PETRUCHIO: Katharina, I charge thee, tell these headstrong women What duty they do owe their lords and husbands. Widow: Come, come, you're mocking: we will have no telling. PETRUCHIO: Come on, I say; and first begin with her. Widow: She shall not. PETRUCHIO: I say she shall: and first begin with her. KATHARINA: Fie, fie! unknit that threatening unkind brow, And dart not scornful glances from those eyes, To wound thy lord, thy king, thy governor: It blots thy beauty as frosts do bite the meads, Confounds thy fame as whirlwinds shake fair buds, And in no sense is meet or amiable. A woman moved is like a fountain troubled, Muddy, ill-seeming, thick, bereft of beauty; And while it is so, none so dry or thirsty Will deign to sip or touch one drop of it. Thy husband is thy lord, thy life, thy keeper, Thy head, thy sovereign; one that cares for thee, And for thy maintenance commits his body To painful labour both by sea and land, To watch the night in storms, the day in cold, Whilst thou liest warm at home, secure and safe; And craves no other tribute at thy hands But love, fair looks and true obedience; Too little payment for so great a debt. Such duty as the subject owes the prince Even such a woman oweth to her husband; And when she is froward, peevish, sullen, sour, And not obedient to his honest will, What is she but a foul contending rebel And graceless traitor to her loving lord? I am ashamed that women are so simple To offer war where they should kneel for peace; Or seek for rule, supremacy and sway, When they are bound to serve, love and obey. Why are our bodies soft and weak and smooth, Unapt to toil and trouble in the world, But that our soft conditions and our hearts Should well agree with our external parts? Come, come, you froward and unable worms! My mind hath been as big as one of yours, My heart as great, my reason haply more, To bandy word for word and frown for frown; But now I see our lances are but straws, Our strength as weak, our weakness past compare, That seeming to be most which we indeed least are. Then vail your stomachs, for it is no boot, And place your hands below your husband's foot: In token of which duty, if he please, My hand is ready; may it do him ease. PETRUCHIO: Why, there's a wench! Come on, and kiss me, Kate. LUCENTIO: Well, go thy ways, old lad; for thou shalt ha't. VINCENTIO: 'Tis a good hearing when children are toward. LUCENTIO: But a harsh hearing when women are froward. PETRUCHIO: Come, Kate, we'll to bed. We three are married, but you two are sped. 'Twas I won the wager, though you hit the white; And, being a winner, God give you good night! HORTENSIO: Now, go thy ways; thou hast tamed a curst shrew. LUCENTIO: 'Tis a wonder, by your leave, she will be tamed so. Master: Boatswain! Boatswain: Here, master: what cheer? Master: Good, speak to the mariners: fall to't, yarely, or we run ourselves aground: bestir, bestir. Boatswain: Heigh, my hearts! cheerly, cheerly, my hearts! yare, yare! Take in the topsail. Tend to the master's whistle. Blow, till thou burst thy wind, if room enough! ALONSO: Good boatswain, have care. Where's the master? Play the men. Boatswain: I pray now, keep below. ANTONIO: Where is the master, boatswain? Boatswain: Do you not hear him? You mar our labour: keep your cabins: you do assist the storm. GONZALO: Nay, good, be patient. Boatswain: When the sea is. Hence! What cares these roarers for the name of king? To cabin: silence! trouble us not. GONZALO: Good, yet remember whom thou hast aboard. Boatswain: None that I more love than myself. You are a counsellor; if you can command these elements to silence, and work the peace of the present, we will not hand a rope more; use your authority: if you cannot, give thanks you have lived so long, and make yourself ready in your cabin for the mischance of the hour, if it so hap. Cheerly, good hearts! Out of our way, I say. GONZALO: I have great comfort from this fellow: methinks he hath no drowning mark upon him; his complexion is perfect gallows. Stand fast, good Fate, to his hanging: make the rope of his destiny our cable, for our own doth little advantage. If he be not born to be hanged, our case is miserable. Boatswain: Down with the topmast! yare! lower, lower! Bring her to try with main-course. A plague upon this howling! they are louder than the weather or our office. Yet again! what do you here? Shall we give o'er and drown? Have you a mind to sink? SEBASTIAN: A pox o' your throat, you bawling, blasphemous, incharitable dog! Boatswain: Work you then. ANTONIO: Hang, cur! hang, you whoreson, insolent noisemaker! We are less afraid to be drowned than thou art. GONZALO: I'll warrant him for drowning; though the ship were no stronger than a nutshell and as leaky as an unstanched wench. Boatswain: Lay her a-hold, a-hold! set her two courses off to sea again; lay her off. Mariners: All lost! to prayers, to prayers! all lost! Boatswain: What, must our mouths be cold? GONZALO: The king and prince at prayers! let's assist them, For our case is as theirs. SEBASTIAN: I'm out of patience. ANTONIO: We are merely cheated of our lives by drunkards: This wide-chapp'd rascal--would thou mightst lie drowning The washing of ten tides! GONZALO: He'll be hang'd yet, Though every drop of water swear against it And gape at widest to glut him. ANTONIO: Let's all sink with the king. SEBASTIAN: Let's take leave of him. GONZALO: Now would I give a thousand furlongs of sea for an acre of barren ground, long heath, brown furze, any thing. The wills above be done! but I would fain die a dry death. MIRANDA: If by your art, my dearest father, you have Put the wild waters in this roar, allay them. The sky, it seems, would pour down stinking pitch, But that the sea, mounting to the welkin's cheek, Dashes the fire out. O, I have suffered With those that I saw suffer: a brave vessel, Who had, no doubt, some noble creature in her, Dash'd all to pieces. O, the cry did knock Against my very heart. Poor souls, they perish'd. Had I been any god of power, I would Have sunk the sea within the earth or ere It should the good ship so have swallow'd and The fraughting souls within her. PROSPERO: Be collected: No more amazement: tell your piteous heart There's no harm done. MIRANDA: O, woe the day! PROSPERO: No harm. I have done nothing but in care of thee, Of thee, my dear one, thee, my daughter, who Art ignorant of what thou art, nought knowing Of whence I am, nor that I am more better Than Prospero, master of a full poor cell, And thy no greater father. MIRANDA: More to know Did never meddle with my thoughts. PROSPERO: 'Tis time I should inform thee farther. Lend thy hand, And pluck my magic garment from me. So: Lie there, my art. Wipe thou thine eyes; have comfort. The direful spectacle of the wreck, which touch'd The very virtue of compassion in thee, I have with such provision in mine art So safely ordered that there is no soul-- No, not so much perdition as an hair Betid to any creature in the vessel Which thou heard'st cry, which thou saw'st sink. Sit down; For thou must now know farther. MIRANDA: You have often Begun to tell me what I am, but stopp'd And left me to a bootless inquisition, Concluding 'Stay: not yet.' PROSPERO: The hour's now come; The very minute bids thee ope thine ear; Obey and be attentive. Canst thou remember A time before we came unto this cell? I do not think thou canst, for then thou wast not Out three years old. MIRANDA: Certainly, sir, I can. PROSPERO: By what? by any other house or person? Of any thing the image tell me that Hath kept with thy remembrance. MIRANDA: 'Tis far off And rather like a dream than an assurance That my remembrance warrants. Had I not Four or five women once that tended me? PROSPERO: Thou hadst, and more, Miranda. But how is it That this lives in thy mind? What seest thou else In the dark backward and abysm of time? If thou remember'st aught ere thou camest here, How thou camest here thou mayst. MIRANDA: But that I do not. PROSPERO: Twelve year since, Miranda, twelve year since, Thy father was the Duke of Milan and A prince of power. MIRANDA: Sir, are not you my father? PROSPERO: Thy mother was a piece of virtue, and She said thou wast my daughter; and thy father Was Duke of Milan; and thou his only heir And princess no worse issued. MIRANDA: O the heavens! What foul play had we, that we came from thence? Or blessed was't we did? PROSPERO: Both, both, my girl: By foul play, as thou say'st, were we heaved thence, But blessedly holp hither. MIRANDA: O, my heart bleeds To think o' the teen that I have turn'd you to, Which is from my remembrance! Please you, farther. PROSPERO: My brother and thy uncle, call'd Antonio-- I pray thee, mark me--that a brother should Be so perfidious!--he whom next thyself Of all the world I loved and to him put The manage of my state; as at that time Through all the signories it was the first And Prospero the prime duke, being so reputed In dignity, and for the liberal arts Without a parallel; those being all my study, The government I cast upon my brother And to my state grew stranger, being transported And rapt in secret studies. Thy false uncle-- Dost thou attend me? MIRANDA: Sir, most heedfully. PROSPERO: Being once perfected how to grant suits, How to deny them, who to advance and who To trash for over-topping, new created The creatures that were mine, I say, or changed 'em, Or else new form'd 'em; having both the key Of officer and office, set all hearts i' the state To what tune pleased his ear; that now he was The ivy which had hid my princely trunk, And suck'd my verdure out on't. Thou attend'st not. MIRANDA: O, good sir, I do. PROSPERO: I pray thee, mark me. I, thus neglecting worldly ends, all dedicated To closeness and the bettering of my mind With that which, but by being so retired, O'er-prized all popular rate, in my false brother Awaked an evil nature; and my trust, Like a good parent, did beget of him A falsehood in its contrary as great As my trust was; which had indeed no limit, A confidence sans bound. He being thus lorded, Not only with what my revenue yielded, But what my power might else exact, like one Who having into truth, by telling of it, Made such a sinner of his memory, To credit his own lie, he did believe He was indeed the duke; out o' the substitution And executing the outward face of royalty, With all prerogative: hence his ambition growing-- Dost thou hear? MIRANDA: Your tale, sir, would cure deafness. PROSPERO: To have no screen between this part he play'd And him he play'd it for, he needs will be Absolute Milan. Me, poor man, my library Was dukedom large enough: of temporal royalties He thinks me now incapable; confederates-- So dry he was for sway--wi' the King of Naples To give him annual tribute, do him homage, Subject his coronet to his crown and bend The dukedom yet unbow'd--alas, poor Milan!-- To most ignoble stooping. MIRANDA: O the heavens! PROSPERO: Mark his condition and the event; then tell me If this might be a brother. MIRANDA: I should sin To think but nobly of my grandmother: Good wombs have borne bad sons. PROSPERO: Now the condition. The King of Naples, being an enemy To me inveterate, hearkens my brother's suit; Which was, that he, in lieu o' the premises Of homage and I know not how much tribute, Should presently extirpate me and mine Out of the dukedom and confer fair Milan With all the honours on my brother: whereon, A treacherous army levied, one midnight Fated to the purpose did Antonio open The gates of Milan, and, i' the dead of darkness, The ministers for the purpose hurried thence Me and thy crying self. MIRANDA: Alack, for pity! I, not remembering how I cried out then, Will cry it o'er again: it is a hint That wrings mine eyes to't. PROSPERO: Hear a little further And then I'll bring thee to the present business Which now's upon's; without the which this story Were most impertinent. MIRANDA: Wherefore did they not That hour destroy us? PROSPERO: Well demanded, wench: My tale provokes that question. Dear, they durst not, So dear the love my people bore me, nor set A mark so bloody on the business, but With colours fairer painted their foul ends. In few, they hurried us aboard a bark, Bore us some leagues to sea; where they prepared A rotten carcass of a boat, not rigg'd, Nor tackle, sail, nor mast; the very rats Instinctively had quit it: there they hoist us, To cry to the sea that roar'd to us, to sigh To the winds whose pity, sighing back again, Did us but loving wrong. MIRANDA: Alack, what trouble Was I then to you! PROSPERO: O, a cherubim Thou wast that did preserve me. Thou didst smile. Infused with a fortitude from heaven, When I have deck'd the sea with drops full salt, Under my burthen groan'd; which raised in me An undergoing stomach, to bear up Against what should ensue. MIRANDA: How came we ashore? PROSPERO: By Providence divine. Some food we had and some fresh water that A noble Neapolitan, Gonzalo, Out of his charity, being then appointed Master of this design, did give us, with Rich garments, linens, stuffs and necessaries, Which since have steaded much; so, of his gentleness, Knowing I loved my books, he furnish'd me From mine own library with volumes that I prize above my dukedom. MIRANDA: Would I might But ever see that man! PROSPERO: Now I arise: Sit still, and hear the last of our sea-sorrow. Here in this island we arrived; and here Have I, thy schoolmaster, made thee more profit Than other princesses can that have more time For vainer hours and tutors not so careful. MIRANDA: Heavens thank you for't! And now, I pray you, sir, For still 'tis beating in my mind, your reason For raising this sea-storm? PROSPERO: Know thus far forth. By accident most strange, bountiful Fortune, Now my dear lady, hath mine enemies Brought to this shore; and by my prescience I find my zenith doth depend upon A most auspicious star, whose influence If now I court not but omit, my fortunes Will ever after droop. Here cease more questions: Thou art inclined to sleep; 'tis a good dulness, And give it way: I know thou canst not choose. Come away, servant, come. I am ready now. Approach, my Ariel, come. ARIEL: All hail, great master! grave sir, hail! I come To answer thy best pleasure; be't to fly, To swim, to dive into the fire, to ride On the curl'd clouds, to thy strong bidding task Ariel and all his quality. PROSPERO: Hast thou, spirit, Perform'd to point the tempest that I bade thee? ARIEL: To every article. I boarded the king's ship; now on the beak, Now in the waist, the deck, in every cabin, I flamed amazement: sometime I'ld divide, And burn in many places; on the topmast, The yards and bowsprit, would I flame distinctly, Then meet and join. Jove's lightnings, the precursors O' the dreadful thunder-claps, more momentary And sight-outrunning were not; the fire and cracks Of sulphurous roaring the most mighty Neptune Seem to besiege and make his bold waves tremble, Yea, his dread trident shake. PROSPERO: My brave spirit! Who was so firm, so constant, that this coil Would not infect his reason? ARIEL: Not a soul But felt a fever of the mad and play'd Some tricks of desperation. All but mariners Plunged in the foaming brine and quit the vessel, Then all afire with me: the king's son, Ferdinand, With hair up-staring,--then like reeds, not hair,-- Was the first man that leap'd; cried, 'Hell is empty And all the devils are here.' PROSPERO: Why that's my spirit! But was not this nigh shore? ARIEL: Close by, my master. PROSPERO: But are they, Ariel, safe? ARIEL: Not a hair perish'd; On their sustaining garments not a blemish, But fresher than before: and, as thou badest me, In troops I have dispersed them 'bout the isle. The king's son have I landed by himself; Whom I left cooling of the air with sighs In an odd angle of the isle and sitting, His arms in this sad knot. PROSPERO: Of the king's ship The mariners say how thou hast disposed And all the rest o' the fleet. ARIEL: Safely in harbour Is the king's ship; in the deep nook, where once Thou call'dst me up at midnight to fetch dew From the still-vex'd Bermoothes, there she's hid: The mariners all under hatches stow'd; Who, with a charm join'd to their suffer'd labour, I have left asleep; and for the rest o' the fleet Which I dispersed, they all have met again And are upon the Mediterranean flote, Bound sadly home for Naples, Supposing that they saw the king's ship wreck'd And his great person perish. PROSPERO: Ariel, thy charge Exactly is perform'd: but there's more work. What is the time o' the day? ARIEL: Past the mid season. PROSPERO: At least two glasses. The time 'twixt six and now Must by us both be spent most preciously. ARIEL: Is there more toil? Since thou dost give me pains, Let me remember thee what thou hast promised, Which is not yet perform'd me. PROSPERO: How now? moody? What is't thou canst demand? ARIEL: My liberty. PROSPERO: Before the time be out? no more! ARIEL: I prithee, Remember I have done thee worthy service; Told thee no lies, made thee no mistakings, served Without or grudge or grumblings: thou didst promise To bate me a full year. PROSPERO: Dost thou forget From what a torment I did free thee? ARIEL: No. PROSPERO: Thou dost, and think'st it much to tread the ooze Of the salt deep, To run upon the sharp wind of the north, To do me business in the veins o' the earth When it is baked with frost. ARIEL: I do not, sir. PROSPERO: Thou liest, malignant thing! Hast thou forgot The foul witch Sycorax, who with age and envy Was grown into a hoop? hast thou forgot her? ARIEL: No, sir. PROSPERO: Thou hast. Where was she born? speak; tell me. ARIEL: Sir, in Argier. PROSPERO: O, was she so? I must Once in a month recount what thou hast been, Which thou forget'st. This damn'd witch Sycorax, For mischiefs manifold and sorceries terrible To enter human hearing, from Argier, Thou know'st, was banish'd: for one thing she did They would not take her life. Is not this true? ARIEL: Ay, sir. PROSPERO: This blue-eyed hag was hither brought with child And here was left by the sailors. Thou, my slave, As thou report'st thyself, wast then her servant; And, for thou wast a spirit too delicate To act her earthy and abhorr'd commands, Refusing her grand hests, she did confine thee, By help of her more potent ministers And in her most unmitigable rage, Into a cloven pine; within which rift Imprison'd thou didst painfully remain A dozen years; within which space she died And left thee there; where thou didst vent thy groans As fast as mill-wheels strike. Then was this island-- Save for the son that she did litter here, A freckled whelp hag-born--not honour'd with A human shape. ARIEL: Yes, Caliban her son. PROSPERO: Dull thing, I say so; he, that Caliban Whom now I keep in service. Thou best know'st What torment I did find thee in; thy groans Did make wolves howl and penetrate the breasts Of ever angry bears: it was a torment To lay upon the damn'd, which Sycorax Could not again undo: it was mine art, When I arrived and heard thee, that made gape The pine and let thee out. ARIEL: I thank thee, master. PROSPERO: If thou more murmur'st, I will rend an oak And peg thee in his knotty entrails till Thou hast howl'd away twelve winters. ARIEL: Pardon, master; I will be correspondent to command And do my spiriting gently. PROSPERO: Do so, and after two days I will discharge thee. ARIEL: That's my noble master! What shall I do? say what; what shall I do? PROSPERO: Go make thyself like a nymph o' the sea: be subject To no sight but thine and mine, invisible To every eyeball else. Go take this shape And hither come in't: go, hence with diligence! Awake, dear heart, awake! thou hast slept well; Awake! MIRANDA: The strangeness of your story put Heaviness in me. PROSPERO: Shake it off. Come on; We'll visit Caliban my slave, who never Yields us kind answer. MIRANDA: 'Tis a villain, sir, I do not love to look on. PROSPERO: But, as 'tis, We cannot miss him: he does make our fire, Fetch in our wood and serves in offices That profit us. What, ho! slave! Caliban! Thou earth, thou! speak. CALIBAN: PROSPERO: Come forth, I say! there's other business for thee: Come, thou tortoise! when? Fine apparition! My quaint Ariel, Hark in thine ear. ARIEL: My lord it shall be done. PROSPERO: Thou poisonous slave, got by the devil himself Upon thy wicked dam, come forth! CALIBAN: As wicked dew as e'er my mother brush'd With raven's feather from unwholesome fen Drop on you both! a south-west blow on ye And blister you all o'er! PROSPERO: For this, be sure, to-night thou shalt have cramps, Side-stitches that shall pen thy breath up; urchins Shall, for that vast of night that they may work, All exercise on thee; thou shalt be pinch'd As thick as honeycomb, each pinch more stinging Than bees that made 'em. CALIBAN: I must eat my dinner. This island's mine, by Sycorax my mother, Which thou takest from me. When thou camest first, Thou strokedst me and madest much of me, wouldst give me Water with berries in't, and teach me how To name the bigger light, and how the less, That burn by day and night: and then I loved thee And show'd thee all the qualities o' the isle, The fresh springs, brine-pits, barren place and fertile: Cursed be I that did so! All the charms Of Sycorax, toads, beetles, bats, light on you! For I am all the subjects that you have, Which first was mine own king: and here you sty me In this hard rock, whiles you do keep from me The rest o' the island. PROSPERO: Thou most lying slave, Whom stripes may move, not kindness! I have used thee, Filth as thou art, with human care, and lodged thee In mine own cell, till thou didst seek to violate The honour of my child. CALIBAN: O ho, O ho! would't had been done! Thou didst prevent me; I had peopled else This isle with Calibans. PROSPERO: Abhorred slave, Which any print of goodness wilt not take, Being capable of all ill! I pitied thee, Took pains to make thee speak, taught thee each hour One thing or other: when thou didst not, savage, Know thine own meaning, but wouldst gabble like A thing most brutish, I endow'd thy purposes With words that made them known. But thy vile race, Though thou didst learn, had that in't which good natures Could not abide to be with; therefore wast thou Deservedly confined into this rock, Who hadst deserved more than a prison. CALIBAN: You taught me language; and my profit on't Is, I know how to curse. The red plague rid you For learning me your language! PROSPERO: Hag-seed, hence! Fetch us in fuel; and be quick, thou'rt best, To answer other business. Shrug'st thou, malice? If thou neglect'st or dost unwillingly What I command, I'll rack thee with old cramps, Fill all thy bones with aches, make thee roar That beasts shall tremble at thy din. CALIBAN: No, pray thee. I must obey: his art is of such power, It would control my dam's god, Setebos, and make a vassal of him. PROSPERO: So, slave; hence! Come unto these yellow sands, And then take hands: Courtsied when you have and kiss'd The wild waves whist, Foot it featly here and there; And, sweet sprites, the burthen bear. Hark, hark! FERDINAND: Where should this music be? i' the air or the earth? It sounds no more: and sure, it waits upon Some god o' the island. Sitting on a bank, Weeping again the king my father's wreck, This music crept by me upon the waters, Allaying both their fury and my passion With its sweet air: thence I have follow'd it, Or it hath drawn me rather. But 'tis gone. No, it begins again. Full fathom five thy father lies; Of his bones are coral made; Those are pearls that were his eyes: Nothing of him that doth fade But doth suffer a sea-change Into something rich and strange. Sea-nymphs hourly ring his knell Hark! now I hear them,--Ding-dong, bell. FERDINAND: The ditty does remember my drown'd father. This is no mortal business, nor no sound That the earth owes. I hear it now above me. PROSPERO: The fringed curtains of thine eye advance And say what thou seest yond. MIRANDA: What is't? a spirit? Lord, how it looks about! Believe me, sir, It carries a brave form. But 'tis a spirit. PROSPERO: No, wench; it eats and sleeps and hath such senses As we have, such. This gallant which thou seest Was in the wreck; and, but he's something stain'd With grief that's beauty's canker, thou mightst call him A goodly person: he hath lost his fellows And strays about to find 'em. MIRANDA: I might call him A thing divine, for nothing natural I ever saw so noble. PROSPERO: FERDINAND: Most sure, the goddess On whom these airs attend! Vouchsafe my prayer May know if you remain upon this island; And that you will some good instruction give How I may bear me here: my prime request, Which I do last pronounce, is, O you wonder! If you be maid or no? MIRANDA: No wonder, sir; But certainly a maid. FERDINAND: My language! heavens! I am the best of them that speak this speech, Were I but where 'tis spoken. PROSPERO: How? the best? What wert thou, if the King of Naples heard thee? FERDINAND: A single thing, as I am now, that wonders To hear thee speak of Naples. He does hear me; And that he does I weep: myself am Naples, Who with mine eyes, never since at ebb, beheld The king my father wreck'd. MIRANDA: Alack, for mercy! FERDINAND: Yes, faith, and all his lords; the Duke of Milan And his brave son being twain. PROSPERO: MIRANDA: Why speaks my father so ungently? This Is the third man that e'er I saw, the first That e'er I sigh'd for: pity move my father To be inclined my way! FERDINAND: O, if a virgin, And your affection not gone forth, I'll make you The queen of Naples. PROSPERO: Soft, sir! one word more. They are both in either's powers; but this swift business I must uneasy make, lest too light winning Make the prize light. One word more; I charge thee That thou attend me: thou dost here usurp The name thou owest not; and hast put thyself Upon this island as a spy, to win it From me, the lord on't. FERDINAND: No, as I am a man. MIRANDA: There's nothing ill can dwell in such a temple: If the ill spirit have so fair a house, Good things will strive to dwell with't. PROSPERO: Follow me. Speak not you for him; he's a traitor. Come; I'll manacle thy neck and feet together: Sea-water shalt thou drink; thy food shall be The fresh-brook muscles, wither'd roots and husks Wherein the acorn cradled. Follow. FERDINAND: No; I will resist such entertainment till Mine enemy has more power. MIRANDA: O dear father, Make not too rash a trial of him, for He's gentle and not fearful. PROSPERO: What? I say, My foot my tutor? Put thy sword up, traitor; Who makest a show but darest not strike, thy conscience Is so possess'd with guilt: come from thy ward, For I can here disarm thee with this stick And make thy weapon drop. MIRANDA: Beseech you, father. PROSPERO: Hence! hang not on my garments. MIRANDA: Sir, have pity; I'll be his surety. PROSPERO: Silence! one word more Shall make me chide thee, if not hate thee. What! An advocate for an imposter! hush! Thou think'st there is no more such shapes as he, Having seen but him and Caliban: foolish wench! To the most of men this is a Caliban And they to him are angels. MIRANDA: My affections Are then most humble; I have no ambition To see a goodlier man. PROSPERO: Come on; obey: Thy nerves are in their infancy again And have no vigour in them. FERDINAND: So they are; My spirits, as in a dream, are all bound up. My father's loss, the weakness which I feel, The wreck of all my friends, nor this man's threats, To whom I am subdued, are but light to me, Might I but through my prison once a day Behold this maid: all corners else o' the earth Let liberty make use of; space enough Have I in such a prison. PROSPERO: MIRANDA: Be of comfort; My father's of a better nature, sir, Than he appears by speech: this is unwonted Which now came from him. PROSPERO: Thou shalt be free As mountain winds: but then exactly do All points of my command. ARIEL: To the syllable. PROSPERO: Come, follow. Speak not for him. GONZALO: Beseech you, sir, be merry; you have cause, So have we all, of joy; for our escape Is much beyond our loss. Our hint of woe Is common; every day some sailor's wife, The masters of some merchant and the merchant Have just our theme of woe; but for the miracle, I mean our preservation, few in millions Can speak like us: then wisely, good sir, weigh Our sorrow with our comfort. ALONSO: Prithee, peace. SEBASTIAN: He receives comfort like cold porridge. ANTONIO: The visitor will not give him o'er so. SEBASTIAN: Look he's winding up the watch of his wit; by and by it will strike. GONZALO: Sir,-- SEBASTIAN: One: tell. GONZALO: When every grief is entertain'd that's offer'd, Comes to the entertainer-- SEBASTIAN: A dollar. GONZALO: Dolour comes to him, indeed: you have spoken truer than you purposed. SEBASTIAN: You have taken it wiselier than I meant you should. GONZALO: Therefore, my lord,-- ANTONIO: Fie, what a spendthrift is he of his tongue! ALONSO: I prithee, spare. GONZALO: Well, I have done: but yet,-- SEBASTIAN: He will be talking. ANTONIO: Which, of he or Adrian, for a good wager, first begins to crow? SEBASTIAN: The old cock. ANTONIO: The cockerel. SEBASTIAN: Done. The wager? ANTONIO: A laughter. SEBASTIAN: A match! ADRIAN: Though this island seem to be desert,-- SEBASTIAN: Ha, ha, ha! So, you're paid. ADRIAN: Uninhabitable and almost inaccessible,-- SEBASTIAN: Yet,-- ADRIAN: Yet,-- ANTONIO: He could not miss't. ADRIAN: It must needs be of subtle, tender and delicate temperance. ANTONIO: Temperance was a delicate wench. SEBASTIAN: Ay, and a subtle; as he most learnedly delivered. ADRIAN: The air breathes upon us here most sweetly. SEBASTIAN: As if it had lungs and rotten ones. ANTONIO: Or as 'twere perfumed by a fen. GONZALO: Here is everything advantageous to life. ANTONIO: True; save means to live. SEBASTIAN: Of that there's none, or little. GONZALO: How lush and lusty the grass looks! how green! ANTONIO: The ground indeed is tawny. SEBASTIAN: With an eye of green in't. ANTONIO: He misses not much. SEBASTIAN: No; he doth but mistake the truth totally. GONZALO: But the rarity of it is,--which is indeed almost beyond credit,-- SEBASTIAN: As many vouched rarities are. GONZALO: That our garments, being, as they were, drenched in the sea, hold notwithstanding their freshness and glosses, being rather new-dyed than stained with salt water. ANTONIO: If but one of his pockets could speak, would it not say he lies? SEBASTIAN: Ay, or very falsely pocket up his report GONZALO: Methinks our garments are now as fresh as when we put them on first in Afric, at the marriage of the king's fair daughter Claribel to the King of Tunis. SEBASTIAN: 'Twas a sweet marriage, and we prosper well in our return. ADRIAN: Tunis was never graced before with such a paragon to their queen. GONZALO: Not since widow Dido's time. ANTONIO: Widow! a pox o' that! How came that widow in? widow Dido! SEBASTIAN: What if he had said 'widower AEneas' too? Good Lord, how you take it! ADRIAN: 'Widow Dido' said you? you make me study of that: she was of Carthage, not of Tunis. GONZALO: This Tunis, sir, was Carthage. ADRIAN: Carthage? GONZALO: I assure you, Carthage. SEBASTIAN: His word is more than the miraculous harp; he hath raised the wall and houses too. ANTONIO: What impossible matter will he make easy next? SEBASTIAN: I think he will carry this island home in his pocket and give it his son for an apple. ANTONIO: And, sowing the kernels of it in the sea, bring forth more islands. GONZALO: Ay. ANTONIO: Why, in good time. GONZALO: Sir, we were talking that our garments seem now as fresh as when we were at Tunis at the marriage of your daughter, who is now queen. ANTONIO: And the rarest that e'er came there. SEBASTIAN: Bate, I beseech you, widow Dido. ANTONIO: O, widow Dido! ay, widow Dido. GONZALO: Is not, sir, my doublet as fresh as the first day I wore it? I mean, in a sort. ANTONIO: That sort was well fished for. GONZALO: When I wore it at your daughter's marriage? ALONSO: You cram these words into mine ears against The stomach of my sense. Would I had never Married my daughter there! for, coming thence, My son is lost and, in my rate, she too, Who is so far from Italy removed I ne'er again shall see her. O thou mine heir Of Naples and of Milan, what strange fish Hath made his meal on thee? FRANCISCO: Sir, he may live: I saw him beat the surges under him, And ride upon their backs; he trod the water, Whose enmity he flung aside, and breasted The surge most swoln that met him; his bold head 'Bove the contentious waves he kept, and oar'd Himself with his good arms in lusty stroke To the shore, that o'er his wave-worn basis bow'd, As stooping to relieve him: I not doubt He came alive to land. ALONSO: No, no, he's gone. SEBASTIAN: Sir, you may thank yourself for this great loss, That would not bless our Europe with your daughter, But rather lose her to an African; Where she at least is banish'd from your eye, Who hath cause to wet the grief on't. ALONSO: Prithee, peace. SEBASTIAN: You were kneel'd to and importuned otherwise By all of us, and the fair soul herself Weigh'd between loathness and obedience, at Which end o' the beam should bow. We have lost your son, I fear, for ever: Milan and Naples have More widows in them of this business' making Than we bring men to comfort them: The fault's your own. ALONSO: So is the dear'st o' the loss. GONZALO: My lord Sebastian, The truth you speak doth lack some gentleness And time to speak it in: you rub the sore, When you should bring the plaster. SEBASTIAN: Very well. ANTONIO: And most chirurgeonly. GONZALO: It is foul weather in us all, good sir, When you are cloudy. SEBASTIAN: Foul weather? ANTONIO: Very foul. GONZALO: Had I plantation of this isle, my lord,-- ANTONIO: He'ld sow't with nettle-seed. SEBASTIAN: Or docks, or mallows. GONZALO: And were the king on't, what would I do? SEBASTIAN: 'Scape being drunk for want of wine. GONZALO: I' the commonwealth I would by contraries Execute all things; for no kind of traffic Would I admit; no name of magistrate; Letters should not be known; riches, poverty, And use of service, none; contract, succession, Bourn, bound of land, tilth, vineyard, none; No use of metal, corn, or wine, or oil; No occupation; all men idle, all; And women too, but innocent and pure; No sovereignty;-- SEBASTIAN: Yet he would be king on't. ANTONIO: The latter end of his commonwealth forgets the beginning. GONZALO: All things in common nature should produce Without sweat or endeavour: treason, felony, Sword, pike, knife, gun, or need of any engine, Would I not have; but nature should bring forth, Of its own kind, all foison, all abundance, To feed my innocent people. SEBASTIAN: No marrying 'mong his subjects? ANTONIO: None, man; all idle: whores and knaves. GONZALO: I would with such perfection govern, sir, To excel the golden age. SEBASTIAN: God save his majesty! ANTONIO: Long live Gonzalo! GONZALO: And,--do you mark me, sir? ALONSO: Prithee, no more: thou dost talk nothing to me. GONZALO: I do well believe your highness; and did it to minister occasion to these gentlemen, who are of such sensible and nimble lungs that they always use to laugh at nothing. ANTONIO: 'Twas you we laughed at. GONZALO: Who in this kind of merry fooling am nothing to you: so you may continue and laugh at nothing still. ANTONIO: What a blow was there given! SEBASTIAN: An it had not fallen flat-long. GONZALO: You are gentlemen of brave metal; you would lift the moon out of her sphere, if she would continue in it five weeks without changing. SEBASTIAN: We would so, and then go a bat-fowling. ANTONIO: Nay, good my lord, be not angry. GONZALO: No, I warrant you; I will not adventure my discretion so weakly. Will you laugh me asleep, for I am very heavy? ANTONIO: Go sleep, and hear us. ALONSO: What, all so soon asleep! I wish mine eyes Would, with themselves, shut up my thoughts: I find They are inclined to do so. SEBASTIAN: Please you, sir, Do not omit the heavy offer of it: It seldom visits sorrow; when it doth, It is a comforter. ANTONIO: We two, my lord, Will guard your person while you take your rest, And watch your safety. ALONSO: Thank you. Wondrous heavy. SEBASTIAN: What a strange drowsiness possesses them! ANTONIO: It is the quality o' the climate. SEBASTIAN: Why Doth it not then our eyelids sink? I find not Myself disposed to sleep. ANTONIO: Nor I; my spirits are nimble. They fell together all, as by consent; They dropp'd, as by a thunder-stroke. What might, Worthy Sebastian? O, what might?--No more:-- And yet me thinks I see it in thy face, What thou shouldst be: the occasion speaks thee, and My strong imagination sees a crown Dropping upon thy head. SEBASTIAN: What, art thou waking? ANTONIO: Do you not hear me speak? SEBASTIAN: I do; and surely It is a sleepy language and thou speak'st Out of thy sleep. What is it thou didst say? This is a strange repose, to be asleep With eyes wide open; standing, speaking, moving, And yet so fast asleep. ANTONIO: Noble Sebastian, Thou let'st thy fortune sleep--die, rather; wink'st Whiles thou art waking.