Ligurian:
Democraçia

Quello giorno a coa a no finiva ciù, a l’anava fiña da l’atra parte da stradda e dòppo ancon inte l’atra stradda; pe poeise registrâ à l’Offiçio Naçionale di Registri do Registro, no ghe veu mai meno de trei giorni de coa, e di belli viægi anche de ciù, ma quella vòtta a paiva franco sensa fin. A l’é unna registraçion che pe-o ciù beseugna resegondâla, perché gh’é delongo quarcösa ch’a no va ben, ò che ti t’ê ascordou o numeo exatto de òsse do scheletro, ò da mesua de scarpe, ò o teu peiso forma, ò de l’atro ancon. Asquæxi tutti s’ascòrdan a penna, a-o momento de intrâ inte l’offiçio se n’accòrzan, e dan l’incarrego à un de quelli figgeu che giandoña d’in gio, ch’o vagghe à accattâghene uña. Son di zoeni desoccupæ che se guägnan doe palanche à quella mainea lì e s’aspetan che ti ghe lasci a boñaman. Tòsto che son arrivou de fronte à l’impiegou, gh’ò dito: “Ma no n’ei vergheugna, à fâ aspëtâ e gente à sta mainea?” L’impiegou o l’à locciou a testa in taxei; ô sò beniscimo che lê o no ne peu de ninte, ma de vòtte no se riësce à stâ sitti. O giorno apreuvo ò dovuo anâ torna à fâ a coa, perché aiva scordou de segnâ a taggia do colletto da camixa, ma no gh’ea ciù o mæximo impiegou da-o portello. L’impiegou do giorno avanti o l’ea inte un scagno da unna banda, ligou a-a carrega e co-a testa into mezo à unna gròssa mòrscia da offiçiña; quelli che passava ghe â poeivan strenze de ciù ò allascâla, comme voeivan lô, e comme l’é giusto perché semmo in democraçia; ma lê o l’ea lì che, se sciaccavan guæi, se ghe rompiva e òsse da testa; de za un fî de sangue o comensava sccioindoghe da unna crenatua.

«Scià no me digghe ch’a l’é corpa mæ», gh’ò dito, «perché vëi ò mogognou!» E lê: «Na, na», o me fa, con un fî de voxe, «de vòtte fan coscì sensa raxon, pe castigâ quarchedun, abrettio. No se sa mai o perché; a giustiçia a l’à e seu raxoin, che no ê peu conosce nisciun. E de za che tutti semmo corpeivi de quarcösa, beseugna corpî a-a sbæra, comme ammoniçion».

Gh’ò allascou un pittin a mòrscia e me ne son anæto. Ma quelli che vegnià dòppo de mi?

English translation:
Democracy

That day the queue went on forever, stretching all the way to the other side of the street and then into the next street as well; to register at the National Office of the Registers of the Register it always takes at least three days of queueing, and often even more, but that day it really seemed endless. It’s a registration that for the most part has to be repeated, because there’s always something that doesn’t add up: either you’ve forgotten the exact number of bones in your skeleton, or your shoe size, or your ideal weight, or something else. Almost everyone forgets their pen, and they realise it just as they’re entering the office, so they ask one of those boys hanging around to go and buy one for them. They’re unemployed youngsters who earn a few pennies that way and wait for you to leave them a tip. As soon as I reached the clerk, I said to him: “Aren’t you ashamed, making people wait like this?” The clerk shook his head without saying a word; I know perfectly well it isn’t his fault, but sometimes you just can’t keep quiet. The next day I had to queue again, because I’d forgotten to indicate my shirt-collar size, but the same person was no longer at the counter. The clerk from the day before was in an office to one side, tied to a chair with his head in the middle of a large vice; anyone passing could tighten it further or loosen it as they pleased, as is only right since we live in a democracy; but he had reached the point where, if they squeezed any harder, the bones of his head would have broken; already the blood was almost beginning to seep out from a crack.

“Don’t tell me it’s my fault,” I said to him, “because I complained yesterday!” And he: “No, no,” he says to me in a thin voice, “sometimes they do this, for no reason, to punish someone at random. No one knows why: justice has its reasons, which no one can fathom. And since we are all guilty of something, they have to strike at random, as a warning.”

I loosened the vice for him a little, and went on my way. But what about those who will come after me?