List of The Dick Van Dyke Show episodes
Season 3 (1963–64)

List of The Dick Van Dyke Show episodes

Section Title: Season 3 (1963–64)
Table Section Text: None

No. overall	No. in season	Title	Directed by	Written by	Original air date	Prod. code

63	1	"That's My Boy??"	John Rich	Bill Persky and Sam Denoff	September 25, 1963	64

Rob tells Mel about the time he thought he brought home the wrong baby from the hospital. Greg Morris makes a brief guest appearance.

64	2	"The Masterpiece"	John Rich	Sam Denoff and Bill Persky	October 2, 1963	65

Rob and Laura inadvertently purchase a painting at an auction — then discover another painting underneath it. Note: Alan Reed, the original voice of Fred Flintstone, plays the auctioneer.

65	3	"Laura's Little Lie"	John Rich	Carl Reiner and Howard Merrill	October 9, 1963	66

Laura is forced to confess to Rob that she lied about her age on their marriage certificate. (Part 1 of 2)

66	4	"Very Old Shoes, Very Old Rice"	John Rich	Carl Reiner	October 16, 1963	67

Rob and Laura must go out of town to make their marriage legal without their friends finding out. (Part 2 of 2) Note: This is the last episode of The Dick Van Dyke Show to be directed by John Rich before he departed.

67	5	"All About Eavesdropping"	Stanley Cherry	Sheldon Keller and Howard Merrill	October 23, 1963	63

Through Richie's toy intercom, Rob and Laura eavesdrop on a private conversation between Jerry and Millie.

68	6	"Too Many Stars"	Jerry Paris	Sheldon Keller and Howard Merrill	October 30, 1963	69

Rob is forced to once again direct the annual PTA variety show and must choose between Laura and another talented dancer for the lead role.

69	7	"Who and Where Was Antonio Stradivarius?"	Jerry Paris	Carl Reiner	November 6, 1963	70

Rob gets temporary amnesia from breaking a violin over his head and winds up at a party in New Jersey with complete strangers.

70	8	"Uncle George"	Jerry Paris	Bill Idelson	November 13, 1963	68

Rob's gregarious Uncle George (Denver Pyle) visits, and asks him to help find a wife. He is attracted to Sally.

71	9	"Big Max Calvada"	Jerry Paris	Bill Persky and Sam Denoff	November 20, 1963	71

An infamous mobster (series producer Sheldon Leonard) asks Rob, Buddy and Sally to write material for his nephew, who aspires to be a comic.

72	10	"The Ballad of the Betty Lou"	Howard Morris	Martin A. Ragaway	November 27, 1963	72

Against the warning of their wives, Rob and Jerry purchase a boat and go on a sailing trip that ends disastrously.

73	11	"Turtles, Ties and Toreadors"	Jerry Paris	John Whedon	December 4, 1963	73

Rob hires a maid to give Laura a rest from housework, but this maid doesn't speak a word of English.

74	12	"The Sound of the Trumpets of Conscience Falls Deafly on a Brain That Holds Its Ears..."	Jerry Paris	Bill Persky and Sam Denoff	December 11, 1963	74

Rob thinks he's just seen the suspects of a recent jewelry store holdup and wrestles with his conscience about informing the police.

75	13	"The Alan Brady Show Presents"	Jerry Paris	Sam Denoff and Bill Persky	December 18, 1963	76

The staff of The Alan Brady Show become the main players of the annual Christmas show. Note: Features the second rendition of "I Am a Fine Musician", this time with the cast costumed as "toy soldiers".

76	14	"The Third One From the Left"	Jerry Paris	John Whedon	January 1, 1964	75

A young chorus girl on The Alan Brady Show (Cheryl Holdridge) develops a crush on Rob.

77	15	"My Husband is the Best One"	Jerry Paris	Martin A. Ragaway	January 8, 1964	77

Laura interferes in an interview between Rob and a magazine reporter regarding The Alan Brady Show, resulting in Rob getting most of the credit.

78	16	"The Lady and the Tiger and the Lawyer"	Jerry Paris	Garry Marshall and Jerry Belson	January 15, 1964	79

Rob and Laura become competitive matchmakers for a bachelor (Anthony Eisley) who just moved into the neighborhood.

79	17	"The Life and Love of Joe Coogan"	Jerry Paris	Carl Reiner	January 22, 1964	80

While golfing, Rob meets a man named Joe Coogan (Michael Forest)...who turns out to be another old boyfriend of Laura's and also holds a surprising "secret".

80	18	"A Nice, Friendly Game of Cards"	Howard Morris	Ernest Chambers	January 29, 1964	81

When Sally arrives at the Petrie house, they explain to her how a game of cards with their new neighbors, a former District Attorney (Edward Platt) and his wife, ended badly.

81	19	"Happy Birthday and Too Many More"	Jerry Paris	Bill Persky and Sam Denoff	February 5, 1964	78

Rob and Laura have a birthday party for Richie in their house instead of at an amusement park, and the children proceed to make a mess of things.

82	20	"The Brave and the Backache"	Jerry Paris	Sheldon Keller and Howard Merrill	February 12, 1964	82

Rob goes to see a psychiatrist to find out if his back pains are psychosomatic. Ken Berry guest stars.

83	21	"The Pen is Mightier Than the Mouth"	Jerry Paris	Bill Persky and Sam Denoff	February 19, 1964	83

Rob and Buddy find it difficult to work without Sally while she's on The Stevie Parsons Show. (Part 1 of 2)

84	22	"My Part-Time Wife"	Jerry Paris	Bill Persky and Sam Denoff	February 26, 1964	84

During Sally's absence, Laura poses herself as the typist on The Alan Brady Show and drives Rob crazy with her excellent work.

85	23	"Honeymoons Are for the Lucky"	Jerry Paris	Carl Reiner	March 4, 1964	85

Rob tells Buddy and Sally about the time he and Laura tried to go on their honeymoon when all free-passes were revoked due to a theft in his army unit.

86	24	"How to Spank a Star"	Jerry Paris	Nathaniel Curtis and Bill Idelson	March 11, 1964	86

The latest guest star on The Alan Brady Show, Paula Marshall (Lola Albright), makes Rob the producer of the show and the subject of her whims, but Rob figures out a way to make Miss Marshall do the show as intended by the writers.

87	25	"The Plots Thicken"	Jerry Paris	Carl Reiner, Bill Persky and Sam Denoff	March 18, 1964	87

Rob and Laura are caught in the middle of a feud between their parents over competing cemetery plots. Features the second appearance of J.

88	26	"Scratch My Car and Die"	Howard Morris	John Whedon	March 25, 1964	88

Laura panics when she gets a big scratch on Rob's new car.

89	27	"The Return of Edwin Carp"	Howard Morris	Carl Reiner	April 1, 1964	89

Rob decides to do a program honoring great radio comedians, but it proves to be a challenge to get Edwin Carp (Richard Haydn).

90	28	"October Eve"	Jerry Paris	Bill Persky and Sam Denoff	April 8, 1964	90

Laura admits to Rob that there's a painting of her without any clothes on, when it goes on display in a nearby gallery.

91	29	"Dear Mrs. Petrie, Your Husband's in Jail"	Jerry Paris	Jerry Belson and Garry Marshall	April 15, 1964	91

Rob explains to Laura how he wound up in jail for disorderly conduct.

92	30	"My Neighbor's Husband's Other Life"	Jerry Paris	Carl Reiner, Bill Persky and Sam Denoff	April 22, 1964	92

At a fancy restaurant, Rob and Laura see Jerry dining with another woman.

93	31	"I'd Rather Be Bald Than Have No Head at All"	Jerry Paris	Bill Persky and Sam Denoff	April 29, 1964	93

Worried that he's going bald, Rob sees a barber who provides an unusual method of preventing baldness.

94	32	"Teacher's Petrie"	Jerry Paris	Jerry Belson and Garry Marshall	May 13, 1964	94

Laura takes a creative writing class, but her teacher (Bernard Fox) seems to be interested in more than just her creativity.

Sentence(s)

"The Lady and the Tiger and the Lawyer," is a 1964 episode of The Dick Van Dyke Show.

final_sentence: "The Lady and the Tiger and the Lawyer," is a 1964 episode of The Dick Van Dyke Show.