== This article lacks sources and had too many external links. == 

 I made major edits to this article today including adding the "citations missing" template and noting a couple of specific places where cites are needed (in particular, the opening claim that this construct is "widely used" in psychology).   

 I deleted a section which had an "example conversation" purporting to illustrate this idea.  It contained no sources, and seemed likely to either be an editor's own example that s/he wrote, making it original research, or an extensive, unsourced lift from elsewhere, creating copyright issues. 

 I also deleted most of the external links at the end, using http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:External_links#Links_normally_to_be_avoided as a guideline.  Most of the provided links fell into categories 5 (web pages that exist to sell products or services) or 11 (blogs) as they were articles written by the website owner on websites promoting psychotherapy, coaching, etc. services.  Two links did not illustrate the content of this article at all - one went to an essay describing Virginia Satir's model of communication styles, and one (which was not in English) seemed to go to the front page of a website with many mental health articles.