:Not a bad start.  One thing to avoid though is writing in the first person (don't use "I" or refer to yourself at all) and don't express any personal feelings about the subject (such as your like, dislike, etc).  WP:NPOV has our general policy on this.  Otherwise, with some cleanup, it's actually a very good first article edit.  The next thing to focus on is organizing the information, and you've done pretty well at this so far.