Ultimate Team War - RMS Titanic

Well, Chrysippus, this has been one of the best Ultimate Team War debates I've ever been in. Let's finish it strong. I will concede that Master Khan can use his powers. My opponent's first few points deal with the attacks and abilities of the Dark Magician. I would like to present the following videos: http://www.youtube.com... Video 1: "Legendary Heroes Part 2" (8:19 - 8:30) Yugi manages to use "Magical Hats" practically instantaneously to both protect his party and teleport them to a safer location. http://www.youtube.com... Video 2: "Legendary Heroes Part 3" (3:59 - 4:04) The Dark Magician immediately launches numerous deadly attacks merely by holding out his staff and looking in a random general direction, destroying the surrounding monsters in his trademark negative-color fashion. As the video clearly shows, the Dark Magician's "weaknesses" only apply when he is participating in a turn-based card game. In the more realistic Virtual World, he acts much more quickly and efficiently. To counter my opponent's two points, the Dark Magician is capable of attacking multiple foes and using his magical powers simultaneously and instantaneously. As soon as Team CON takes aim at the Dark Magician as he emerges from the Mystic Box, he can use Magial Hats to further hide himself, and place three more hats in three corners of the room, able to randomly pop out of any and attack without warning. The original hat is vaporized by the "withering fire," but it matters not. He can then use Dark Magic Attack to destroy Deadshot and inflict damage upon everybody else, ending his sniping spree before it can ever begin, and engage the rest of Team CON. As Deadshot is necessary to any and all plans my opponent has in taking out Link and Cloud, and my opponent is no longer allowed to make any new plans, Link is safe, and my opponent can no longer win. As Hellboy approaches the Dark Magician in an attempt to punch his lights out, he can merely jump over him in a "cool" front-flip as seen in "Double Trouble Duel Part 2" (the video I linked to in Round 3) (5:17 - 5:31), then fire a flurry of Dark Magic Attacks at Hellboy, the Doctor, and Master Khan. Hellboy seems to lack the agility and levitational powers that the Dark Magician has, so he can dance circles around Hellboy and render him useless, being sure to avoid and redirect any attacks from Master Khan and the Doctor. The Dark Magician may eventally be caught off-guard, but not before blasting Hellboy into dust and tiring out Master Khan and the Doctor. Now, meanwhile, Link is floating high in the air on Cloud. My opponent counts on Deadshot to take care of Link, but, well, he's kind of dead. Even if Deadshot were alive, he'd have a problem making out Link and Cloud in the nearly pitch-black night sky, especially when Link doesn't show his head until he's 1,000 feet away vertically. My opponent claims to get the same "ficitonal light source" that Link gets when he aims his Hero's Bow, but this light source happens to be whatever lights are on the ship itself. Surely, there are some lights on the Titanic at this time. I mean, this 800-foot ship can't be invisible to Link. Then its just a matter for Link to identify the stern, notice any movement at all on this small area, and fire with the incredible aid of his Hawkeye mask. This is far easier than Deadshot's task of finding Link against the entire expanse of the night sky. Deadshot might have properly investigated about 5% of Link's potential hiding spots before being struck by an arrow. And this is all assuming that he isn't already dead. For the record, with 1,000 Rupees, Link is able to survive a hit for about 500 seconds, or 8:20, which is all the time he needs. One shot, though, and he's going to take a dive, as Cloud suddenly has to evacuate. If Cloud is ever left without Link on his head, he can merely float over the Titanic and unleash his lightning bolts over whatever team my opponent has left. Meanwhile, Link will fall into the water, changing into the Zora suit in midair. This fall may seem like it would knock out Link, as my opponent claims, but Link's been through worse. To get from the City in the Sky, which is miles above the surface, back to Hyrule, Link is actually launched down to earth from a powerful Sky Cannon, which makes his impact velocity even greater. However, he merely fell into Lake Hylia without so much as a flinch. He's got some crazy resistance to physical turmoil, that Link. My opponent further claims that Deadshot can then snipe Link, but he'd first have to get to the bow of the ship in order to snipe the surrounding water, a task that the Dark Magician can ensure he never accomplishes, and even then, Link can hang out in the water for pretty much forever, and Deadshot will never find him; he'd probably be more concerned with the Gyarados that will launch a Hyper Beam in his face as soon as he so much as peeps over the rail, much to his surprise. My opponent's plan is to shrink Gyarados to a microscopic size. This would be the same as if Gyarados repeatedly used the Pokï¿½mon move Minimize. Yes, Pokï¿½mon actually commonly regard it as an advantage to be shrunk. Here's the thing: even though Minimize shrinks Gyarados, it only increases his Evasion. A microscopic Gyarados' Hyper Beam is just as powerful as a giant one. With this super-minimization, Gyarados will become the ultimate weapon, with all of his original power, defense, speed, and accuracy, but just plain impossible to actually spot. Gyarados can unleash a mini-Hyper Beam with just as much range as before, wiping out Team CON's unsuspecting team as they approach. They won't know what hit them until it's too late to reverse Khan's fatal mistake. Mini-Gyarados will easily destroy what Dark Magician's Dark Magic Attacks and Link's arrows couldn't. Meanwhile, Tiny Kirby will invisibly jump on Master Khan's back without being noticed, then enter Master Khan's body. As seen in the Kirby episode "Microtizer," while shrunk in somebody's body, Kirby can actually navigate through the body and attack and eat things in it. He can then traverse to Master Khan's cranium and slowly eat away at his limited number of brain cells. Any white blood cells, or any other cells sent to defend his brain against Kirby, will be eaten. In this way, Kirby will eventually have eaten all of Khan's brain, killing him. He can then repeat the process with the Doctor, or anybody else who somehow managed to avoid the flurry of attacks I've launched against him. Even if my opponent can take down this epic mini-Gyarados, he still can't win, for Link will be hiding deep below the surface of the water. He merely has to wait until Master Khan tires of floating above the water, and falls, for Master Khan is the only character that my opponent has that can survive the sinking of the Titanic. A few strikes from a Clawshot will then eliminate Master Khan easily, end of story. In conclusion, first, the Dark Magician eliminates Harold with the Mystic Box, then avoids CON's initial strikes with Magical Hats. He then fires Dark Magic Attack, killing Deadshot and injuring Hellboy, the Doctor, and Master Khan. He then proceeds to fire upon Team CON with the aid of Link sniping with arrows atop Cloud. This goes on until the Dark Magician falls, and Link has been sniped by the dead Deadshot (effectively never). If anybody dares to come to the bow of the ship, Gyarados (or eventually mini-Gyarados) will destroy them, and if all else fails, mini-Kirby will literally eat their brains. Team CON stands no chance. In any case, my opponent has no method of defeating an underwater, invisible Link. Thank you, Chrysippus. This was a great Ultimate Team War. I look forward to your closing arguments, as well as any future Ultimate Team War debates that I hope you have. The Titanic proved to be a great place for battle. Good luck!