Gay Parenting

Although this debate has been noob sniped, I don't want to forfeit and lose on that basis alone. I'm going to post an argument and my opponent can feel free to rebut if he or she so chooses. According to the 2000 U. S. Census, 1/3 of lesbian couples and 1/5 of gay male couples have at least one child under the age of 18 living in the home [1]. Many children are being raised by single parents or non-biological parents, including gay couples. Con will have the burden of proving that this is significantly detrimental to these children. We cannot rely on the fallacy of appeal to tradition, considering sociological trends are shifting what that tradition will become. I also think it's significant to note that these figures are 12 years old. We have good reason to believe that the numbers are even higher today. Some points to start... 1. Being gay is not a mental disorder [2]. Like most heterosexuals, most gay people are fully functioning members of society. A good parent is responsible, competent, loving, trustworthy, etc. None of these qualities are exclusive to heterosexuals. There seem to be no qualifications of a good parent that a gay person can not possess. 2. It seems to be that a parent's sexual endeavors have little to no impact on their ability to raise a child; instead what's important is the attention and care that child receives. Most children do not know details about their parents sex lives. It is irrelevant to their relationship. If Molly's parents practice S&M, and Jim's parents haven't had sex for 15 years, those factors in themselves are probably not going to affect how well each child turns out. 3. There have been numerous studies indicating that children raised by 2 parents have more success and less emotional or behavioral problems than their single-parent counterparts. We can think of several reasons for why this is probably the case: shared division of responsibility, more resources, more emotional support, etc. Of course these same benefits can be provided by 2 parents of the same sex. A UC Berkeley study finds that data indicates there is a visible benefit to having a two-parent family, regardless of whether the couple is married, heterosexual, or same-sex [3]. 4. On that note, much like adopted parents, gay parents typically have to go out of their way to have kids (i.e. in vitro fertilization). Meanwhile 50% of heterosexual babies are unplanned. Psychologist Abbie Clark explains, "That translates to greater commitment on average and more involvement" [4]. 4. Jessey Levey, a Republican activist, has two gay moms and says "I am a well-adjusted heterosexual whose upbringing proves that love, not gender, makes a family... My family had strong family values. I was raised in a loving, caring household that let me be a free thinker... I'm tired of hearing that my family isn't legitimate." And while I don't want this debate to turn into a he said/ she said quote war of personal testimonials, Jeff DeGroot, a man with two lesbian moms, notes "My parents can throw a baseball and take me hiking just as well as any man could. I've always had a plethora of male role models. I never felt that I was missing anything by not having that dad for me" [5]. Kids with gay parents aren't missing out on these things. There are plenty of people raised by gay parents who have had great experiences and turned out very well adjusted. Zach Wahl's speech about family (he also has two lesbian moms) went viral on YouTube, and I encourage my opponent to look it up. He is a very successful and admirable young man. However, I mentioned that I don't want this to turn into a debate over anecdotal evidence. We need to consider not individual cases, but how much sexuality in general influences parenthood. 5. As I've said, kids with gay parents can turn out perfectly fine, just as kids with heterosexual parents can turn out perfectly fine... or not. It could go either way. A parent only has so much influence in their child's life. "Evidence indicates that parents have little or no long term effect on their children's personality, intelligence, or mental health. The environment definitely has an effect on how children turn out, but it's not the home environment. It's not the nurture they do or don't get from their parents" [6]. Now, while no one can deny the impact parenting has on a child's emotional and behavioral development, the amount of attention and care a child receives is most important. Con must explain how a parent's sexuality, either homo or hetero, has a specific impact on a child's behavior. 6. I expect my opponent to make the argument that kids with gay parents might get teased more. There are two fundamental arguments against this premise. First, kids get teased for a plethora of reasons. Kids with parents who are fat, ugly, dumb or heck even "normal" for all intents and purposes get teased just because that's what kids do. However fat people or people with red hair (Gingers) aren't considered inherently inferior parents just because their kids might get made fun of due to qualities their parents have. Second, the reason that kids might get teased is because gay parents are still the minority. However, history shows us that through exposure, cultural norms and expectations shift. After awhile what is once obscure becomes familiar. That is why in bigger cities like New York and L.A., kids with gay parents are barely given a second thought, whereas that might not be the case in culturally stunted places like Arkansas. Exposure and acceptance is the only way to change attitudes so that this no longer becomes taboo. 7. Rather than rely on anecdotal testimonials, let's explore what science and psychology say. Ellen C. Perrin, MD, professor of pediatrics at Tufts University School of Medicine in Boston reveals "The vast consensus of all the studies shows that children of same-sex parents do as well as children whose parents are heterosexual in every way. In some ways children of same-sex parents actually may have advantages over other family structures." Researchers looked at information gleaned from 15 different studies on more than 500 children, evaluating possible stigma, teasing and social isolation, adjustment and self-esteem, opposite gender role models, sexual orientation, and strengths. Studies from 1981 to 1994, including 260 children reared by either heterosexual mothers or same-sex mothers after divorce, found no differences in intelligence, type or prevalence of psychiatric disorders, self-esteem, well-being, peer relationships, couple relationships, or parental stress. Two other large studies involving more than 100 couples found that same-sex parents also had contact with extended family, had social support, and had a more equitable division of labor in the home [1]. In a 2010 review of virtually EVERY study on gay parenting, New York University sociologist Judith Stacey and University of Southern California sociologist Tim Biblarz found no differences between children raised in homes with two heterosexual parents and children raised with lesbian parents. While research indicates that kids of gay parents show few differences in achievement, mental health, social functioning and other measures, research shows these kids may have the advantage of open-mindedness, tolerance and role models for equitable relationships [4]. I'll leave it at that for now. Sources: [1] http://www.webmd.com... [2] http://psychology.ucdavis.edu... [3] http://turnstylenews.com... [4] http://www.livescience.com... [5] http://www.cnn.com... [6] Wierson, M., & R. Forehand. (1994). Parent behavioral training for child noncompliance: Rationale, concepts, and effectiveness. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 5, pp 146-150. -- Referenced in "You Are Being Lied To" interview with Judith Rich