love on first site is true

Observation: My opponent advocates that love is something you don't need knowledge of your partner to feel. that love is something that can be obtained and properly utilized in any relationship without understanding it and mastering it. I however will be arguing that Love is an action and love is a choice. You have to act out love in order to actually love someone. You have to display your love by trusting in your partner and stabilizing that relationship. Definition of Lust = have a very strong sexual desire for someone: Ex: Lust for chocolate drew her into the candy store. Explanation: This isn't the best example for the definition I found online however it doesn't serve the purpose of supporting the definition but rather supporting how fast lust takes control. Before I go into my overall conception of love which is found in the KJV bible I will first present issues with love on first site 1. Problems with love on first sight Well for starters nearly 58% of Americans believe in Love at First Sight 50% say they have experienced it. (1) So I bet you are wondering if there is a problem at all with this belief on love. Well only a fraction of these relationships have any staying power. 80% of ‘chemistry driven’ relationships fail in less than three months. (1) Divorce rates are another measure of the majority of Americans who believe in this. In fact 50% of marriages end up in a divorce. (2) I went to bible study today and we learned that love rushed is "dead." In other words if you seek love like crazy and go for someone based off the so called "love on first sight," you are signing a death certificate for your relationship and giving birth to a divorce. Love on first sight is inimical to any relationship of any form or fashion. 2. The concept of love on first sight alone is false Let's forget the empirical evidence for a second and simply look at this from a philosophical/logical perspective. There is a difference between love and lust and desire. Look to my definition of lust and then look to my explanation of love in my 3rd contention. Lust is seeing someone and desiring them, people confuse this for love and simply act on it when really you see a girl that you simply think is super hot. Love as I state is an action and ultimately a choice, you choose to love which is why God states love others as I love you. Love isn't a random feeling. Love is like joy or peace, it's not random and takes an effort to develop and hone. But anyway lets take out the love in the statement "love on first site". You now have this statement, "on first sight". We know that love isn't something that randomly happens thus it can't fill in the blank. But consider the definition of lust I presented at the top of my case. I describe it as a sexual desire, and you only walk up to a girl you are interested in if you find her attractive right? If you got the typical teen or even adult and asked them if they would choose someone they found attractive or someone they didn't they would probably choose the person they feel is good enough for them. Eros love is one of the loves I present in the next contention, this is purely attraction based and is needed in any relationship. But forget all that, now look at the example I provide, "Lust for chocolate drew her into the candy store." Notice how quick the result was, notice how lust is an instant almost instinctive force. Notice most importantly how lust theoretically activates on first sight of the weak link, or in other words the thing you desire. Therefore rather "lust on first sight," is the true meaning of this socially accepted concept. 2. What love really is Introduction: First of all Love is an action, when you find someone so attractive on first site that's only one part of love and the least important, Eros love. You have to trust and care and understand your partner in order to love them. You have to choose to love someone after you get to know them. You can't "fall in love" because if you fall in love you will fall into a divorce. sub point A: agape love it is defined as a Greek word in the new testament as meaning the love of god. Here is an example from the bible For God so loved (agape) the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have eternal life." (John 3:16) Also in many studies people who have a close relationship with god tend to have longer relationships. This love basically allows you to embrace the other loves better and is the most important one to have. God is love (1 John 4:16) Sub point B: Eros/sexual/sensational love The world mostly defines love in this category but what they don't understand is this is just a piece to a bunch of other loves that are vital to have. This love is based off attraction/sex so you can't just have this one alone cause when your spouse gets older it will wear off and relationship would go down hill. It is logical that yes this love will be included cause Bureau of static shows that majority of people's first interest in the other sex is attraction from a distance; so yes this love can be included but it can't be alone. For example as your spouse becomes older she will of course become less attractive over time. Sub point C: family love A Stanford study showed that family love is the most important because it can determine how you develop and can determine your actions in the future. For example if you grow up with a family who mostly does drugs chances are you will to, or if you grow up with a family who shows compassion and gives to charity you probably will be influenced by those actions and do the same thing when you grow up. It is essential that you have love in the home you grow up in so you can understand how to love your future spouse and children. Look at Christ Brown hitting Rihanna. It turns out that Chris Brown himself had an abusive dad. Sub point D: brotherly love/companionship love This love is friendship love or brotherly love among members in church. This is a great love to have because you are more open and have people you can count on in hard times. Sources: 1. http://www.yourtango.com... 2. http://www.huffingtonpost.com... I await his response.