In Current Day, Male Nipples are USELESS!

1) The Beach Argument"I HAD BAND-AIDS ON MY NIPS"Im feeling aroused...."DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS LIKE TO LOOK AT RED NIPS?! I felt like Miley Cyrus!"Who there, In order to legitimately claim that you felt like Miley Cyrus you have to sell your self-respect, invent a new terrible type of dancing, and adopt a hairstyle that makes you look like a brain dead giraffe: https://i.chzbgr.com..."GREEN STUFF COMIN' FROM MY NIPS!"PLEASE STOP, I AM ALREADY AROUSED. "What the HELL is the point in nipples if they DRIVE AWAY WOMEN?! "Lol ok, there are about 140 other things that can drive away a woman before nipples even enter the equation..... And about 90 of them have to do with whether or not you look like Ryan Gosling. 2: They screw you over"Be honest with me. Have you ever saw a really, REALLY fat guy from afar and thought he was a topless woman?"Nope, moving on.Argument 3: They make women less special...GOOD. Women need to be knocked down a notch anyways..... "you would think that God would give them another physical thing that men shouldn't have."I think God would focus on making the average breast 10 times larger before he ever decided to handle the nipple conundrum....."Do you honestly think that men should have (almost) every physical trait a woman has?"Um, YEAH! If women had tails, or gills, or 7 eyes while men didnt, that would kind of make women horrendously unattractive and freak out men dont ya think?"THUS INCREASING INTERNET PORN."I think men already devote WAAAAAAAAAAY too much time to internet porn in the first place..... "we all know that the government needs internet porn"lol, no they do not! The reason they dont get anything done in the first place is BECAUSE they spend all their time watching internet porn! Making even more of it will only make the government perform even worse!========================================================================Reasons why Male nipples do not suck:1) They serve as a personal GPSWhen you give the pledge of allegiance, where do you put your hand? Thats right: directly over your nipple! Nipples serve as a GPS for you doing the Pledge of Allegience. Without nipples, your hand could end up in all kinds of weird places, like over your stomach, or on the boob of the girl standing next to you!2) They serve as leverageThe act of a 'titty twister' is the act of twisting ones nipples viciously clockwise and/or counter clockwise to cause pain, and it has been a go-to tactic for people to fight someone who dont match the physical strength of their opponent. Nipples serve as a potential weak spot for countering a physically superior foe at times when no other means exists3) It would just look weird.Look, if you met a guy without any nipples, that would be the weirdest lookin dude you would ever see. Just because something doesnt serve a functional use, that doesnt mean it doesnt serve an aesthetic use either..... Nipples are like belly buttons. Not particularly valuable to have, but if someone doesnt have them then its horrendously weird and borderline terrifying. 4) They can be funnyEver see a drunk person pass out and then his buddies draw a hysterical face on his stomach with the nipples serving as eyes? Nipples serve as a hysterical item that can be exploited when taking advantage of someone who is passed out drunk.Not only that, if someone has something hysterical happen that results in them losing one of their nipples, it can be the funniest thing ever! http://sargentspeaks.wordpress.com...Nipples do not suck, they are quite hysterical and serve an aesthetically valuable purpose, among other things as well