Astrology and Horoscopes are Real

Since my opponent has yet to offer a rebuttal I'll use this space as a non-debatable placeholder until he returns, rather than just writing forwarding R1 statements. Yep, I can do this; we didn't mutually agree to the FF, so I get to go off the reservation for a round.I'll take this opportunity to tell you about Pisces, which is my sign. They are often accused of beings scatter brained. I really don't believe this is true, never have……………….oh look a squirrel! What's with the 70’s esque porn music at the begining and end of this video?http://www.youtube.com...Their head is most often in a dream world but will snap back pretty quickly when irked. They have no qualms about mowing you down or kicking the butt of all your imaginary friends. Galileo, Einstein, and Michelangelo all were Pisceans. This might explain why they spend much of our time looking up, tripping over things or being hit by busses. As children many stare into the night wondering where the sun has gone, only to have it dawn on them. Their intuitions regarding people are usually spot on, but are jerk magnets. Pisces will ignore the approaching Zombie that's about to make lunch of them but, have a visceral response to the person in cubicle #3 as the corporate embezzler. Without exception, ALL Piscean women are Gorgeous; Jennifer Love Hewitt, Fabio (I can’t believe it’s not butter commercial), Eva Mendes, Jessica Biel, Rihanna, Elizabeth Taylor and I are all Pisces women of unsurpassed beauty. Pisces don't have a good sense of direction, I can attest to that. After all the sign is two fishes chasing each other's tail. My requirement for traveling alone is 2 GPSs; I still manage to get lost. I often feel given directions don't make sense and go off using my own inner compass; never with good result. I get to a point of high frustration, start crying and have to call for help. Once during an "I'm lost call," I described the big dipper as being to my left which means I'm traveling east; makes sense right? There was also a line of 6 maple trees, one with a barn owl perched atop. Hearing this, my BF told me to stop smoking the ganja and hung up. She knows better than to say something like this. I haven't partaken in this substance since the incidence of 1982. While watching the lunar eclipse I toked some real jamming Acapulco gold. Somehow, I ended up being pinned between a garbage truck and a dumpster; never heard the backup beep. It was so worth it in the end. The eclipse cleansed my spirit, freeing me from my inner turmoil. My BF is a naysayer attributing my spiritual rebirth to the 2 week induced coma I was put under to recover from the big squash. The Pisces horoscope for today states I will be plagued with a plethora of happy people. How can this be, especially in a work situation? I can only attribute this to a collective mass happiness hysteria to which I'll play no part. There was an attempt to retrieve another horoscope version from the highly reputable Onion News, but the site stated the page I was seeking burnt down. No doubt the Pisces page manager was having a bad day resulting from too many positive feeling co-workers. Another highly esteemed horoscope site stated that I needed to travel to Australia to watch my career flush in an opposite direction. D'oh! Why pay for travel to watch water spin counter clockwise? I'll just pour water in a glass and swish it around to view what it has to say.From 2012 to 2026 is an interesting time for Pisceans since Neptune is residing in the house of the sign; really cool stuff. During this period Pisceans will experience a spiritual awakening. I hope this is a positive thing, I don't want to reevaluate my departure from organized religion; can't take all the rules and the bashing of one group or another. I am very comfortable loving everyone. Also, our already well developed empathy trait will be heightened and will act as a magnet for collective turmoil. Sorry fellow Pisces, you can't stay in bed or shut off the news as avoidance tactics. As you know, the cosmos will directly feed negative energy to you. If you are not already depressed, you soon will be. To avoid this cosmic negative influx you need to use your psychic energy blocking tool. If you have yet to learn it, I strongly advise that you call me at 555-556- 2134. My fees are reasonable and the cosmos affirms the guarantee of its effectiveness.