Rap Battle

Himilkyes, I got bad news You got more problems that Europe's got Jews You're problems don't go bad, they stay bad like bad booze. Y'all think you know me but you don't so who's To judge me, who's to blame For the fans and the haters not thinking the same. First you're biggest problem, is when you drop a few lines I doesn't sound like more than nursery rhymes. And I don't mean to offend your virgin ears But I myself have plenty of years On this Earth, and I learned that words have girth So first, don't call me a retard. That word is reserved for the mentally scarred. Other words have the same effect, and you could have at least stayed politically correct. Second, I'm gonna warn you now Sometimes the English language gets a little bit foul. But hey, I'll use it sparingly So the point that I'm making stands out glaringly. You see, rap is an art And I'm gonna put you down from the very start. Now that I used this round to set some parameters, Let's circle up, and cross the diameter. Hey, I'm ready to throw a few licks So take some laxatives, cause you'll be sh*tting bricks. You're success rate will go down from here, You better play it by ear, I got nothin' to fear. You see, you really don't pose a threat to me As I said you got a problem, so what does that mean? Well, you know, basically There are 98 more of you for Jay-Z. And he can rap about every day and night, But he ain't never gonna get it right. "If you're having girl problems I feel bad for you son, I got 99 problems but a b*tch ain't one". I'm Jay-Z's b*tch, but in no Sandusky way, I'm saying I'm top dog of this rapping relay. I chill with Jay-Z. I chill with Weezy. I chill with the legislators of the rap law. I chill with Drizzy. I chill with Nicki. Hell, you can call it a Minaj-a-trois. Himilkyes, go get 'em, Tiger But you better not get you're Wood up in my girl. See, unlike you, I respect the women and shawties Maybe you'd find more luck at the Lemon Parties. Or maybe it's time you board the Cain Train Watch Herman's ratings disappear—David Blaine. Now if you don't like my slanderous sedition, Maybe it's time we draft a petition To debate.org, we'll make it easy for you "Put a FORFEIT DEBATE button up in bright blue". You would click it, and then you would avoid The shame and embarrassment, because I'm Lloyd Bentsen, and you're Dan Quayle Don't call yourself JFK when you're on the campaign trail. I could keep going, I still got more But I think I've done what you've asked me for. My rap isn't just more witty that yours, But it's also the length of yours—times four. And hey, this is only round two I got plenty more rhymes in the future for you. So tell me, do you really want more of it? Or are you just gonna decide to forfeit? Let me know now, I don't want to wait, for you to lose every argument in this debate. If not, it's time for you to bring it. Maybe this time you'll reach the CHARACTER LIMIT. You're verse was short. Your rhymes were a tort. For sucking so bad I oughta take you to court. But hey, I gotta nasty cohort We're gonna read your next post, and chuckle and snort. Like Bocephus, I got rowdy friends And when I kill in this debate, we'll divide the dividends. I gotta go now, I got homework to do. I'll see you when I'm done with my Algebra II.