Satan is a woman.

Thank you for accepting. Now lets begin... ------------------------------------------------------------------ The common idea that Satan is a male is going to be my first argument. As the Bible says numerous times, Satan comes to us as things or people that conflict with who he really is. Why? Because if Satan came to us as a red skinned man with little devil horns, and a little Goatee, Little devil eyes to help a little devil see, and little cloven hooves that make it kinda hard to ski.. Or Stephen Lynch's father(a)... Then we would know to run away. a)http://www.metrolyrics.com... http://www.youtube.com... Satan comes as an Angel of Light... Another way of saying that Satan comes not as a devil, but as something we don't expect...(b) b) http://biblehub.com... While the Bible refers to Satan has a 'him,' we must remember that the Devil is the second strongest thing in creation, and can change gender at will. Lucifer can choose who to become, even what species to be. We know this because Satan choose to be a snake several times in the Bible. Satan would have appeared to the writers of the Bible as a guy. With so much calling Satan a guy, including the very Bible that warns us about 'him,' Satan would choose to be a girl. Satan hides behind false names, being things we would expect... The one thing we would never expect is Lucifer being a Lucy instead. ------------------------------------------------------------------ Another argument is that Satan being a girl would explain why he revolted against God... We know God is a guy... Not only does the Bible specifically call him Heavily Father, but the writer's heard God's actual voice. Satan would never reveal her true form to someone. We also know God is male because Men was created in God's image. Since the first person was a male, God himself has to be male. If God was a girl, than Adam would have been made in the image of a 'her.' This explains how we know Old Lucy is a girl... She wanted power and Female supremacy! We all know NO ONE rebels against men better than a woman. Lucy was tired of being second best to a man... Couldn't stand it. The fact that God freely lets Lucy into Heaven says God can't live with out her... Typical male behavior...(a) a) http://www.biblegateway.com... God, like any man, wants to show off his favorite things. In this case, Job. And what does Old Lucy want to do? Destroy it! Typical Female behavior. Lucy can't help but to make all of God's favorite thing look bad... She has to argue with him on everything, and destroy he's creations... Again, very very Female of her. ------------------------------------------------------------------ Another argument is power... Satan wants to control everything (again, very Female like) and knows how to obtain it... You see, a Man can only control the man that like him, and has close to no power over women... If Satan were a female, she would have absolute control over Women just by shouting Female Rights or something along the lines of 'Men oppress us!' Is also happens to be Satan's argument about God, and how he 'oppresses' people (which also happens to be the argument Liberals use towards God and Religion, and everyone knows Liberals are the devil and Obama's the Anti-Christ.) Satan could control the Female half of the species easily by being a Female, and could control men even easier... Lets be honest, if a guy walks up to you and tells you to kill Mitt Romney, you say no... If a sexy babe walks up to you and tells you to kill Mitt Romney, you grab a gun. ------------------------------------------------------------------ Another argument is history... How many wars have been started over women? How many scandals involve women? Satan obviously has his hand in all that... Maybe Old Lucy was the woman/women who started them! ------------------------------------------------------------------ People do not expect Satan to be a girl. Satan makes everyone think she's a guy so you never actually know it's her... Remember Eve? Satan didn't go to Adam, she went to Eve... What did she say to Eve? That God didn't want them eating from the tree in the middle of the garden because the male God couldn't oppress her anymore if she. Hipster Satan, starting Feminism before it was cool... Remember a few arguments up? "shouting Female Rights or something along the lines of 'Men oppress us!' Is also happens to be Satan's argument about God, and how he 'oppresses' people" ------------------------------------------------------------------ With this, I conclude my case, that Lucy must be a girl. No one would expect it, just the way she likes it... And it further explains why her and God can't get along...