The clergy should keep their beaky noses out of our Yuletide celebrations

I should like to extend my sincere thanks to my opponent for graciously accepting this debating challenge, even though his recommendations represent no more than the bitter rantings of Christian fundamentalist (with the emphasis on "mentalist"). I'm sorry, but it's just typical, isn't it? The God Squad are always out to stop other people having fun, aren't they? When they showed up in Europe at Yuletide and saw naked virgins dancing around the bonfire before being invited into the bushes by young men anxious to "enlighten" them, one of those ancient priests probably turned to his clerical colleagues and said: "That's not fair! Look at all those lucky blokes getting their ends away and all we can do is stand and watch. I mean, we have to remain celibate, it says so in our contracts of employment. I tell you what, let's put the kaibosh on the whole caboodle by telling them that engaging in this sort of heretical horseplay will condemn them all to an eternity in Hell." I mean, that's just pure, malicious spite, isn't it? And the church has been oppressing people ever since. And now, 1200 years after those sacrosanct spoil-sports arrived on Europe's shores, here's my opponent doing the church's malevolent bidding by suggesting that we should feel "guilty" about engaging "hedonistic" pursuits during the festive period. As I understand, this is what my opponent proposes: * Ostracise Santa Claus and make people save all the money that they were going to spend on the kiddies' Christmas presents and give it to the local priest instead. http://img.photobucket.com... (He wants you to vote Con) * Make everyone fill the little kiddies Christmas stockings full of coal and tell them that that's all they deserve. http://unfittoys.files.wordpress.com... (She wants you to vote Pro) * Force families to gather around crosses rather than Christmas trees. http://mcbush3.files.wordpress.com... (God-fearing Christian folk celebrate Christians Con's way) * Banish poinsettias. And left-wing dissidents. http://www.flyingchariotministries.com... ("Heil Con!") * Issue a press release stating that the Three Wise Men travelled to Bethlehem in a sleigh pulled by a team of reindeers. Sounds unlikely, but The Sport would probably run the story. http://curiouslypersistent.files.wordpress.com... http://www.visit4info.com... http://myweb.tiscali.co.uk... (Con's press propaganda machine in action) * Ban kissing underneath the mistletoe lest the encounter should develop into full-blown, white-hot sex session and thenceforth post coital dance celebrations. http://farm1.static.flickr.com... (Con's plan backfires when a priest celebrates his night of passion with Sister Mary while the bishop inspects the parochial house's floorboards) * Replace roast turkey, cranberry sauce, sage and onion stuffing, roast potatoes, Yorkshire pudding, chipolatas wrapped in bacon and seasonal vegetables drizzled in a rich, red wine gravy and served with lashings of champagne with a leaf. http://plus.maths.org... (Con's slap-up Christmas feast) But let's not kid ourselves. It's not just Con that wants to stop people enjoying Christmas. There is already a mass campaign against seasonal fun and frivolity underway and evangelical Christians who want to deprive us of our Yuletide celebrations are leading it. http://www.greem.co.uk... http://soapboxrants.files.wordpress.com... http://www.indymedia.ie... http://www.craphound.com... In the light of these dangerous developments, I urge you all to please vote Pro, if not for my sake, do it for the sake of the poor little kiddies. Thank you.