Being a Fatty is Worse than Being a Ginger

Swimming My opponent states that burn lines are worse than being a fatty! Well now I beg to differ! Sunburns = Everybody gets em Just plain fat = only about 96% of all beach goers! 96% < 100% Also, I want you to tell me what looks worse. The natural skin color of a ginger that my opponent posted above, or this: That’s what I thought. At least gingers have a chance to get some abs and show off to the ladies! If you do not think the above ginger my opponent posted is the sexiest thing you have ever seen then there may be some serious problems with your brain. My opponent then goes onto to some absolute bull shat over some un-proven scientific theory called buoyancy which scientists have only discovered and been researching for the past 3 and a half days. The fact that my opponent even has knowledge of this top secret scientific discovery only further proves he is a super cyborg robotic ginger of awesomeness that knows everything and works for the R.C.G.A (Robotic Cyborg Gingers of America) which is a top secret government program that is secretly taking over the world. I have taken 3 years of middle school science I think I know what I am talking about. Gravity pulls fat people down so they sink whenever they fall into water. Looking Pregnant It is quite severe my fiery friend! Fatties are already embarrassed for being who they are and now they have to endure further embarrassment for it! The baby needs a beer?! That has to be the worst thing you can possibly say when people think you are pregnant! You'll probaly end up losing whatever small amount of friends you had! I’m sorry, which one is pregnant? I’d probably guess the super hero one because I would tap her any day. I see her baby lump stickin out! Oh and before my opponent says I only like the woman because I am “fat albert” here’s a picture of me. Walking Up Stairs Quite a tragic accident that was. Let us all take a moment of silence for the respect of all the fatties. Now then, my opponent states that fat people falling down stairs doesn’t happen as often as I would like you all to believe! ORLLY NOW. According to the FAP (Fat American People) Association exactly 4,454,954.3 Fat people fall down the stairs and can’t get up daily. You have got to be kidding me. You are telling me that a skinny boy will have trouble going up stairs because his shoes have no soles? Fat people weigh like at least a couple thousand pounds! They have trouble going up a step without breaking a staircase! Don’t even get me started on how expensive it is with them and home repairs! Farting and Fat People My opponent is correct and has shown logic and scientific evidence that it is fat people that always fart, although I disagree with the ozone layer. My opponent states, “It's not that we always assume it's the fat guy, the fact is, it's just always the fat guy.” And then states, “Ginger farts have the ability to melt faces of those that the farter loves. From experience, I've sent four girlfriends to the hospital. It sucks.” My opponent is talking about fat gingers, which both of us can easily agree is the worst mixture of genetics of all time. Both of our arguments our negated. 1. Fat people are the ones that always fart. 2. Ginger farts melt people’s faces off. 3. Only fat people fart, therefore only a fat ginger can do this. Luckily, I can continue off the fact that fat people fart all the time regardless of being a ginger where as you are forced to drop the arguments because gingers can only fart if they are fat. Anyways, to the ozone layer. My opponent is completely off with this statement! The reason the ozone layer has been repairing itself is because of the use of oil, fossil fuels, and driving cars everywhere! The farts of fat men have nothing to do with this and the “nutrients” in their farts actually cause chemical explosions in the atmosphere 78% percent of the time and it actually weakens the ozone layer! Being Attractive Don’t get me started! According to the ROJAA(Rich Over-Rated Judgemental A$$holes of America) exactly 49.9999% Of people in America find fat people more attractive than gingers where as a HUGE gap of 1.0001% of people in America find gingers more attractive! Ron Weasely: Dayamn. Santa Clause: Hmmm, I concede to this one, but you get my point! MassiveDump: Sexy We could do this forever, but in the end I've got all the 100% legit statistics! Plus gingers are sassy and who doesn't like a little sass? Oh, and I think I win -> http://www.youtube.com... Physical Activity Football: A good football team needs a versatile man who can do more than one thing if he needs to. Being a fat wall isn’t going to cut it in football when those mean lean, black machines have handled fatter ladies than the likes of him. Golf: Just, please, just look at the video and watch them fail. They are obviously incapable of working a golf cart. http://www.youtube.com... http://www.youtube.com... Baseball: When fielding they are far too slow to get that ball or even throw it to someone. Even pitchers and catchers have to do some fielding and running surprisingly. Basketball:Sorry, but dem nigga$ wouldn’t exactly have what you call, a problem, jumping over a fat man and dunking over him! Sumo Wrestling: OH please, who watches Sumo wrestling?! Notice how I listed sports people actually watch?! My opponent concedes to the fact that fat people falling is indeed horrifying. Noticeability All those pranks can be pulled of by duct taping a bunch of pillows to a skinny man! Skinny people can make themselves fat with the use of items but fat people can’t make themselves skinny the same way! My opponent concedes that fat people are no good in the military and can't go tomohawking a bunch of Osma BinLadens. My opponent posts a picture of a ginger with his head on fire. Of course that makes them noticeable! In the same way that if a fat man takes out a trumpet and starts blaring it at random people they will tend to be noticed! Fact is, that ginger is using his powers to manipulate power of his own free will. In the same way, the fat guy uses his power to blare that trumpet of his own free will. If you make that ginger stop doing his power and take away the trumpet from the fat guy then you will still get a very noticeable fat guy! Gingers 1. The Ability to Control And Manipulate Fire at Will. Frankly, he is obviously holding out his hands in a way that shows he has power over the situation! Just look! His face shows absolute focus! MassiveDump, please try to refrain from lying about such a thing! We all know you are a skilled firebender so please, for the sake of our audience let’s get real here! My opponent makes an Avatar reference. What you didn’t know was that every fire bender is a ginger. None of the other nations could take them seriously in war so they all dyed their hair then went to kick some a$$. 2. Can Burst Into Flames Burning Everyone Around Them. What my opponent says is indeed true. Those hot tempers can indeed cause them to spontaneously combust. On the bright side, if you are getting hot headed then maybe you took out somebody you didn’t like anyways! 3. No Soul Which Means No Emotions which Means NO FEELING HAPPINESS EVEN AT THE SIGHT OF THE BIRTH OF YOUR OWN DAUGHTER (or for me the sight of a cheeseburger more likely). What is this blasphemy?! Daughter? You’re a robot for God’s sake! Or at least a circumcised cyborg! 4. Gingers are Naturally Good at Doing an Irish Jig! Point taken. Maybe a very desperate way to make some money off the street when you are poor…? 5. The Pot of Gold at the End of the Rainbow. If you want to get technical, I never implied you were a lepherchaun! Only 11% of gingers are! It’s just in your genetics to know where the pot of gold is! Just pay off the KKK wouldja? They probably need some more ammunition to kill people anyways :D Anyways, you are all cyborgs with flame powers. I seriously doubt the KKK is going to be much of a problem. Thanks. Back to you!