Writers debate

VICTORIA Everything was wrong. What Victoria had thought to be a simple bet, had turned out to change into something horrible, sick, and more than twisted. None of this would have ever happened, if she hadn't have made that stupid bet. Why did their pride have to speak for her? Her life, she knew, was never going to be the same. BEFORE She and Dennis had been sitting at their usual table at lunch, when the beautiful, rich, popular Beth, and her 'dumb jock' boy friend approached them. Beth was a senior, who thought she was better than everyone, because her dad was a CEO for a major business. This contributed to the fact that she had the nicest car in the school, her 'natural' beauty, (which Victoria was almost positive was 100% synthetic), and her overall popular demand of practically every guy in school. Beth had started being her usual snobby self, "Hey squashmores!" "What do you want Beth?" Dennis had said obviously peeved. Dennis had strong feelings against Beth and her boyfriend, for almost constantly making fun of his "lack of wealth", whenever they had the chance. " Oh nothing, just wanted to say hi to some friends" lied Beth, smugly. 'She just loves to mentally screw with people' Victoria was thinking. Victoria tried to remain as calm as possible, "Go away please." Beth didn't like being told what to do. She was the one who ordered people around, not the opposite! " We just wanted to talk to you. No need to be mean!" Dennis and Victoria waited un-enthusiastically. "Have you heard of that creepy man over on Plymouth avenue?" Beth said with a serious look in her eyes. Dennis said "There are alot of creepy men on that street. But yes, I think I know who your talking about. What's the point?" Victoria was spectical at where she was going with this. "You see, me and Jared, heard that the man who lives there is Vietnam war vet. Stephanie told us that he suffers from post dramatic stress dis-order" Beth said, still holding the seriousness charade. Victoria was getting annoyed. "So?" "So, rumor has it that he kills innocent people, slowly by torturing them. After he takes the dis-membered body parts and stores the in his basement!" Beth grinned at us, as she viewed the shock on our faces. Dennis and Victoria said nothing for a few moments. Then Dennis stood up and said "That's a load of BS!" "Oh yeah? Prove us wrong." Beth said coldly. Dennis hesitated for a few seconds, before finally saying "What's in it for me?" Beth smiled, knowing she had finally reached her goal. " Get a video. A documentary of you going into the basement, and proving that there are no bodies. Do this, and we will leave you alone forever." Victoria thought that the idea that Beth and Jared would leave them alone was superfluously appeasing. "Deal! I'll do it." The look in Dennis's eyes when he said this, was straight-forward and strong. "And I'll come with you!" Victoria declared, stepping up beside Dennis. Dennis looked down, before saying "Are you sure? You don't have to come..." Beth practically jumped at the opportunity. "Scared?" came her taunt, in a smooth, perfect voice. This angered Victoria. "I'm in!" She said, with clenched fists, that were glowing with determination. Beth smiled one last time before leaving. "See you later, squashmores..." VICTORIA Now here she stood, staring at the cold, life-less body of a police officer she had never seen. She did not know what this meant, but the sight had her locked in shock. "Wh-wh-where is he?" Victoria stuttered, now realizing the nightmare wasn't even close to over. "This is never going to end... He is going to kill us. After he kills us, he will continue to murder innocents... No one will ever know. He can't be stopped. We are scre-" Dennis interrupted Victoria. "Shh... We can still get out of here. Don't worry, we'll figure this out." Then the evil voice rang out from somewhere in the house. " Seems as if Goldy locks and her little friend think they can invade my house, and get away with it." The two looked around in complete horror, but could not distinguish where the voice was coming from. " I told you not to bring the police, little boy. Now you know what this means..." No matter how hard the teens looked they could not place where he might be. Mean while they were frozen in place, not knowing whether to run, hide, or submit defeat. The house was so dark, that Victoria couldn't make out anything other than the lifeless body in front of her in the kitchen. Suddenly Victoria could make out a figure standing in the hallway. The man was holding something long in his hand, but Victoria could not make out what it was. "Were trapped... He is blocking the way to the door" whispered Dennis. The voice continued: " Do you think, in the real story, that goldy locks would have gotten away with invading the three innocent bears house, if the bears had caught poor little goldy locks?" Dennis started sobbing. "Please let us go! Were sorry we came here without permission! Leave me and my friend alone please! We promise won't tell anyone!" Victoria and Dennis waited, but no answer came. Suddenly the man in the hallway rushed into their obscured view holding what looked like a watermelon machete. The old man moved so fast, with a speed that neither of them would have suspected someone of his age could have ever accomplished. Neither of them had time to react as the blade whipped across Victoria's arm, cutting deep about three inches across. Victoria screamed as blood gushed rapidly from her now severed and torn arm, and she fell over holding her wound. The pain was un-explainable. Her arm felt like is was on fire, and she could feel nothing other than the infinite pain. The old man stood above her, raised his weapon, ready for the kill. Victoria didn't care. She wanted the pain to stop. If that meant dying, then so be it. Victoria, still moaning in pain and terror, looked hazily up at the man. Her vision was blurred, however she could see the knife coming for her. Then, all of a sudden, everything seemed to go in slow motion. Victoria closed her eyes and waited for the blade to pierce her skull. A few seconds went by, and nothing happened. Her ears were ringing from her own screams, and she could hear nothing. ' Am I dead?' She thought after a few seconds. Victoria opened her eyes, in shock and dis-anointment, at seeing she was still in the house. Where was the man? And was Dennis? Victoria weakly turned her head to see that Dennis was wrestling with the man for the knife. He must have tackled him away just as the knife would have pierced her! DENNIS Dennis struggled with the man who was already overpowering him. He had to do something fast! Dennis realized though that there was nothing he could do to get the heavy man away from him. It would end here. WHACK! Dennis didn't figure what happened until he felt his arms go limp to his sides and blood running down his face. All he could feel, was the energy slowly leaving his body. He figured out that the old man had hit him in the face with the butt of the knife. He was done. PANNGG!! The sound of the hit was un-mistakable. Dennis knew what happened. He looked up to see Victoria standing over the limp body of the man, holding a shovel. She had saved him. " Hurry let's get out of here!"Victoria barely managed to let the words escape her mouth. The two turned towards the door, and were almost to freedom when they were shocked yet again. "UHHNN..." Came a loud moan from downstairs. Both understood what this mean. ---------- Former problem: Teens again trapped in house with old man New problem: Man is temporarily unconscious. Before leaving, they heard the girl they previously thought was dead, moan from the basement. They must save her before it is too late. This has been fun! Thanks! I wish you the best of luck. -philosophical