Presidential Debate: Peter Griffin vs Eric Cartman

Ok I dont have time to respond to all of Fatty's counterarguments but I will say this. First off, Meg's real father is Stan Thompson, you can even look it up. Second, All of the money I got from the welfare fraud scheme I gave back to taxpayers at the Superbowl, which is better then what the government does with the money it steals from everybody else, wouldnt you agree? C, Cartman claims that I feed, shelter, and cloth the worlds douchiest liberal, but I will have everyone know that I kicked out 000ike from my house over a month ago..... Second, yes ive done meth, i highly recommend it. Lastly, I have discriminated against cripples if you count George W Bush as being handicapped (which I do) By the way, if you mash together George W Bush and Dick Cheney, you'd end up with Dick Bush, and honestly i would have listened to a lot more of his speeches if that was his name...... ========================================================================== Ok here are the three questions from the audience regarding America's foreign policy. Falconduler asks "I am a huge supporter of the state of Israel and fondly believe that the jews have a right to the territory that they currently occupy, however the new conflict with Palestine has me upset over the stability of the region. What are you willing to do to restore peace to the region and at the same time affirm the superiority of Israel?" Rationalmadman asks "Where I grew up, being respectful to others was a code i lived my life by, however over the years America has made numerous enemies that we did not need and many countries now do not like the US. As president what would you do to have America be more loved then feared?" And an anonymous person asks "I already know for a fact that the illuminati and free masons are in control of the worlds governments and wish to use their influence to kill Libertarianism among other things, but my question is what are you willing to do to continue drone strikes in the Middle East, which is something that is very effective under the Obama administration and is a policy that I whole-heartedly support?" ========================================================================== Well to answer Falcondulers question, I dont know much about the whole Israeli - Saudi - Yemeni - Pakistani - Hello Kitty - thing thats going on over there. I now I can be an idiot on stuff like this but one thing I am not sir, is an idiot, so excuse me if im not fully aware of whats going on exactly. As far as im concerned if you put a Palestinian guy next to an Israeli guy, I cant tell the difference between the two. They both smell like sun dried pubic hair to me as well.... I say we let them sort out their own problems and if they dont then we'll add them to the list of countries of brown people that Americans cant find on a globe and dont care about.... As for RationalMadman's question, the best way to be a good neighbor is to get to know them and go drinking with them on the weekends and do all kinds of crazy stuff with them. We know that Russians like Vodka, That Iranians like women, that Israelis like money, and that Cuba likes cigars, and if we throw in the Dos Equis guy we have a party that can solve all the worlds parties. As Stephen Colbert once said, "F*ck the police and just party" *might not have actually been said by Stephen Colbert* Lastly there is Geo- er, I mean, that Anonymous guy's question about drone strikes.... Now we all know why we had drones in the first place, because of what happened at Ground Zero. I speak of course of the place in downtown Manhattan where the greatest tragedy of Modern America happened, because it was on 9/11 2001 in New York City at around 9 AM where the first guy got Aids...... *Peter pauses while Brian Griffin explains to Peter what happened at Ground Zero on 9/11* So thats why we invaded Iraq? *Brian explains that Iraq had nothing to do with the 9/11 attacks and that it was men from Iraq, Saudi Arabia, and a few other countries working for another guy who was a Saudi Arabian who was operating from Afghanistan and was later sheltered by Pakistanis* So we need to invade Iran? *Long pause, Brian asks if he can buy some pot from Peter* Anyways, We use drones to kill terrorists, if Americans dont want to use drones then they should let me know and we can work something out :) I now cede the rest of my time to my fata** opponent.