Aliens should be held acountable for the 2008 economic recession that they caused

I accept the existence of aliens -- David Bowie would never lie. I must also thank him for the warning about the Babel Fish. As a measure against prying alien ears I shall construct my argument in Dog Latin[1]. Andus I requestus thatus my opponent do the samus. RebuttalsWhen wildlife filmmakers see a lost, injured or starving animal they don't intervene because they don't want to upset the balance of nature. Untruus; filmmakeri are sadisti[2]. "Thereus is a needlessly protracted sequenceu s betweenus the mother and a wounded cubus that’s pureus filmmaker sadismus". Sous we shouldus assumus thatus alieni are also sadistius. Therefore it's worth taking notus of the factus that David Bowieus sings songs about sadists. .. I will stop talking in Dogus Latin nowus. Hopefully alieni are retardus. Now look here you extra-terrestrial explorer chaps, we appreciate that you don't want to interfere with our affairs and would rather just observe our activities but there are occasions when we really could do with your help. One of those occasions was back in 1929 when the collapse of the American Stock Market led to the Great Depression and another was in 2008 when another banking crisis led to another massive depression. You see; these sadists will take that to mean:'Now look here big boys, we appreciate that you don't want to *ahem* penetrate our force-fields -probably because the women pilots won't let you, what, what- and would rather just pleasure yourselves but there are occasions when we can't quite climax. One of those occasions was back in 1929 when Herbert 'The Pervert' Hoover bit off a bit more than he could chew, what, what and another was in 2008 Barack 'A-Boma' (what, what) Obama went for the depression again". My argumentsLet's assume, for arguments sake, that these sadists could have stopped the recession. Do we really want them any closer than they already are? Let's think about that. They're probably masochists. The Doctor kicks alien a$$ every week and the aliens keep coming back for more! [3]. Toy Story featured three aliens: Buzz - the arrogant one[4], Zurg - the evil one[5] and the retarded ones in the machines[6]. The sadists in District9 are completely uncivilised[7]. PAUL is. .. Well. .. Randy[8]. TeenageMutantNinjaTurtles are. .. Well. .. Tennagers[9]. The cyber-men are heartless[10]. The Jedi have big guns[11]. The Daleks are just plain cocky[ 12]. And now I've just insulted every sadist there is. so; if you want uncivilised, arrogant, heartless, evil, retarded, randy, sado/masochist and, quite frankly, cocky teenagers with big guns messing around on or near our planet then be my guest. But I would rather keep them at arms length. I look forward to the feeble excuses my opponent makes to defend the sadists. Sources[1] . http://en.wikipedia.org...[2] . http://movies.nytimes.com...[3] . http://en.wikipedia.org...[4] . http://en.wikipedia.org...[5] . http://en.wikipedia.org...[6]http://en.wikipedia.org...[7]http://en.wikipedia.org...[8] . http://en.wikipedia.org...(film)[9]http://www.ninjaturtles.com...[10] . http://en.wikipedia.org...[11] . http://en.wikipedia.org...[12] . http://en.wikipedia.org...