I am epic

Trollish response? I feel very bad for doing this but I'm going to have to destory the negative case with some pretty epic arguments. Epic arguments can only come from epic people. Contention 1: I've beaten the bestNow, it is undeniable that debating is epic. If you didn't classify it as epic you wouldn't be here on the site. Debating is subjective and therefore it is up to me to interpret whether or not it is epic. Now I propose the following sylogism for my first argument: p = premisec = conclusion P1: Debating is epicP2: Good debaters are epic P3: I have beaten a good debaterC1: I am a good debaterC2: I am epic P1 has already been demonstrated. P2 can be demonstrated by P1. If debating is epic (according to my own subjectivity which is fine since epicness is subjective), then people who are good at doing epic things (ie. debating), are epic people. P3 can be demonstrated by the fact that I have 'technically' beaten the sites voting moderator in a debate. Balacafa vs Whiteflame: (http://www.debate.org...) [2]My opponent (whitflame) has an elo above 5000, making him appear on the first page of the top debaters [1]. He has never forfeited a debate since joining DDO 1 year ago. He then, in a debate with me, forfeited. The rules stated that if you forfeit then you forfeit all points to me. Therefore, despite the debate not being over yet. It is inevitable that I have won the debate and therefore I am epic at doing epic things. This makes me an epic person. C1 is proven by my debate with whiteflame. C2 is proven by my explanation of my debate with whiteflame. Contention 2: I have epic statsMy stats on this site are epic. That is undeniable. With my 51 won debates on only 4 losses [3]. My win ratio is at 92.73% that is extremely high in terms of looking at this in regards to the number of debates that I have participated in [3]. My elo is above 4000 making me very close to being on the second page of the top debaters [1,3]. I am truely epic based on this. My percentile is 99.66% bringing me extremely close to the top debaters [3]. Contention 3: I am a nice person I am such a nice person that it makes me epic and considered to be epic amongst the community. I did an extremely long debate with lannan13 [4] and in the final round he ran into some personal issues and requested a tie on the debate. If I had not agreed to the tie then lannan13 would have been forced to forfeit the debate and I would have won. I found the epicness in my heart and decided to allow him to tie such a long debate that I'd put many hours into. I am so nice that I've even defended the likes of Hitler [2]! Of course I do not personally believe this but I because I am so epic and nice I decided that I would defend him because I'm such an epic person. On top of all of this, I am even going to allow whiteflame to continue our debate (even though I technically won), just because I understand that everyone forgets once in a while. All of these users have been so greatful and probably did think that I'm epic just because I have done what most users wouldn't have done - given them a second chance. There are many examples of people who have denied having their debates tied due to personal issues. Check out the comments of this notorious debate in which Thett requested a tie but it was refused: http://www.debate.org...;[5]. Contention 4: Occupation I work for the government [3]. I get to influence decisions and I also get to make decisions in various parts of the UK. I have a lot of power and even more responsibility. In order for me to successfully use this power and responsibility, I must be an epic person. Uncle Ben said to Spiderman, with great power comes great responsibility. As demonstrated, I have great power (in the government) and great responsibility (in the government). Therefore, I am similar to Spiderman in terms of qualities that do not involve his powers. Spiderman is referred to as the amazing spiderman [7]. Since I share so many qualities with Spiderman, it is evident that I am amazing too. Epic is a synonym for amazing [8]. Therefore, since I am amazing, I must also be epic. Conclusion Sorry Con, if this wasn't the trollish argument that you may have expected it to be. With that, I hand it back to you for rebuttals, since I hold a major portion of the burden of proof in this debate. Sources[1]http://www.debate.org...[2]http://www.debate.org...;[3]http://www.debate.org...;[4]http://www.debate.org...[5]http://www.debate.org...[6]https://en.wikipedia.org...[7]https://en.wikipedia.org...[8]http://www.firstcovers.com...