That Santa Claus, on Balance, is Beneficial to Mankind

My god, I accidentally chose pro.....We will assume that my entire round 2 argument was satrical for the sakes of the debate and funniness. (It's an incredibly hard challenge, but I think I can manage)Here we go now.It is because he needs to spend money to buy coal, these girls would be encouraged furthermore to not get pregnant. Thus, in the Santa-exists world, those girls would actually recieve great benefit because they wouldn't dare get pregnant at all, because the coal business would be chasing them down and arresting them due to their hate because the girls are the reason Santa has to buy so much coal--Santa is only doing his job, after all--and thus due to Santa, the benefits of less accidental pregnancy is very obvious. Secondly, the addition to CO2 is not necessarily bad. In fact, there is little to no evidence that CO2 traps heat and in fact real evidence shows that it adds to the ozone, helping it, thus availibly gain more Antarctica land. (as seen from http://www.redstate.com..., and the picture below from http://www.americasfreedomfighters.com...) Santa is trying to help the animals too, as very obvious in the pictures below. We don't have to worry about going to the North Pole to help the animals any more, Santa is helping us do our job. Thus it is obvious he is quite beneficial to mandkind. Now, as for the pollution, it's obviously over-bloated. China makes much more than just 2 billion gifts per year. In fact, just counting the American Imports, we have a total of $29 billion. (See: http://www.npr.org...) Not to mention that that's not all of the countries China exports to, and that we haven't counted all the factories within China. Besides, who says Santa's factory really pollutes the air? Santa probably uses the same travel magic that allows him to visit every children in one night as to build all those 2 billion gifts. Maybe all his elves have his magic too. Who knows? Now to talk about "Santa's cruelty". Two people can justify a reindeer killing a woman? Please, one of them's the singer's "Grandpa", and the singer sounds pretty old to me. 40's? 30's? I don't know, but his grandpa is near-dead, so he seems to be the only survivor. Yet, he sings about the song pretty jollily, and he doesn't go like "I HATE SANTA BECAUSE HIS REINDEER RAN OVER OUR GRANDMA." I think there's a very good reason the singer's grandma got run over. Santa is very just, giving gifts to people who act good and giving coal (or snowman poop) to people who are bad. Grandma is either a serial killer or she really wanted to die but she couldn't suicide on her own so Santa helped her. This song, with the singer actually sounding happy about his grandma's death, is definitely proof that Santa is a good person. Now, as for the secretive message, obviously, since Santa isn't really an unjust murderer, he can't run away from against the law because he didn't break the law. Furthermore, as for "riding on an open sleigh" just means "enjoy the breeze and wind". I mean, would you go inside a closed sleigh and be locked there forever, unable to enjoy the open air while the others laugh at you? Of course not. Santa's "discrete message" is obviously good for everyone. FINALLY, as to his "evil alien picture", it was obviously photoshopped. Santa was just using his magic to make delicious candy canes for everyone. This is the original, non-photoshopped picture You can tell the guy who photoshopped this was a pro.NOW, TO REBUT MY OPPONENT.... (God, this is becoming my hardest debate yet!)My opponent tries to talk and stress on Santa's intimidation. That's actually a good thing. He can intimidate burglars out of your house easily. He has an intimidating face to avoid reporters asking him questions, stalking him, or even assassins murdering him! This old man is not one to be messing around with, he's Santa! Because he's so darn popular, he has to try using disguises and different routes so murderers won't kill the all-important Man of Christmas. Santa is good in his heart, he may look evil, but in reality he's awesome, intelligent, having an excellent plan that prevents reporters, murderers, while still doing his job.Besides, scared faces can look hilarious. You gotta admit you laughed at some of those photos. He scares the children to get laughs, even the children laugh after they realise Santa wouldn't really do any harm to them.Photos of children after the initial intimidating face of Santa: s://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com...; alt="" width="450" height="300" /> As you can see, my argument for the second round was definitely satrical. My opponent misinterpreted it. (Actually, no, I accidentally took the wrong side. And phew--what a dramatic turn-over!!) Santa cannot harm anyone. He does not mean any harm. Santa is definitely, indisputably, beneficial to humankind.I'm dead now. Please take your time to rebut and reconstruct. My fingers hurt like .