Rape

It is true that bridal kidnapping is a tradition in their culture, but that does not mean she wanted to get married to him that way. The bride even admitted that she did not want to marry him this way, he had promised her that he would not do it and he would go about marrying her another way. Just because the bride said yes to the bridal scarf does not mean she wanted to marry him at the moment, like you said she even said she didn"t want to get married yet, it was too soon (26:50). The women of the groom"s family would of kept trying to get the bride to agree to put the scarf on even if it took hours or days. They would not of stopped until she put it on (15:00). She was forced to accept the marriage even if she didn"t want to, if she didn"t agree to it what would have happened to her? Would they of let her leave and return back home to her family? It is true that the bride and the groom in this instance knew each other, and were dating, but that does not mean he did not rape her. In non-traditional rape, the two people who are involved know each other, even if they were husband and wife. She resisted the marriage, and put up a fight when they kidnapped her, that clearly is her not giving consent to getting married (14:25). If she was not giving her consent then, what makes anyone believe that she wanted to have sex with him after the wedding? She did say to the wedding official that she came on her own will, but if she had said no and that she was kidnapped there is a possibility of something worse happening to her like the groom killing her (27:43). She was put in a bad situation as soon as the groom had kidnapped her. You claim that the bride said no to the marriage and resisted in order to seem genuine, meanwhile she stated that she did not want to get married this way, the groom had promised to do it a different way (16:23). She did not say no because she didn"t want to seem desperate, she said no because this is not how she wanted to be married. Yes she loved the guy and wanted to spend the rest of her life with him, but even husbands who love their wives rape them. The bride saying no does mean that she wanted to say yes and be married to him. The bride said no because she didn"t want to be kidnapped, she only accepted the bridal scarf eventually because she figured she had no other way out. Yes, this bridal kidnapping is a part of their tradition, but that does not mean that every bride, especially this bride, who wanted to finish her schooling wanted to be married this way. If her family were aware of it, which seems to be likely, it doesn"t mean the bride was not raped. The family may have given the groom their permission, and accepted his forgiveness for kidnapping their daughter but the family is not the daughter. The daughter is the one who has to give her consent to the marriage and the sexual intercourse then ensues. She clearly said no to marriage but eventually caved because she realized there was no other way since the groom"s family would not stop trying to convince her that it is the right thing to do. Since the bride had said no, and tried to fight off the kidnapping party in the van, when the bride and groom consummated their marriage, she was raped. The hanging of the wedding sheet was the evidence of the rape occurring. The bride was a virgin, and the groom took away her virginity when he raped her. (35:35) She had not given her consent to the marriage, so she did not consent to having sex with him on their wedding night. This was clearly rape.