Dogs cannot be Anarcho-Socialists

My proposition: A lot of people say dogs' love is unconditional and they are "loyal" animals. Evidence proves the contrary, however. Instead, dogs manipulate people and use coercion and even violence in order to get what they want, just like authoritarian governements. Ultimately, this means that dogs are incompatible with a truly Anarcho-Socialist-Syndicalist worldview and, furthermore, dogs should be prohibited by the Anarchist Politbureau. http://www.youtube.com... Here is my evidence: 1. A dog expects food. If you cease feeding the dog, it will then steal your food while you are not looking. It doesn't do this merely to feed itself in the short term, but as a violent method of thought-control, placing you in fear of having your food stolen. By such violence, it controls you and reinforces the patriarchy. http://www.youtube.com... 2. A dog prefers to use the restroom outside. If you do not let your dog outside to use the restroom, it will use the restroom on your couch, or on a favorite rug, or in your bed. Again, this is violent and coercive --- symptomatic of an underlying fascist and authoritarian mentality. Sometimes it will wake you up in the morning then, right in front of you, use the restroom on your collection of Dinesh D'Souza documentaries. What is this, if not violence? 3. A dog expects water. If you cease putting water in the dog water bowl, the dog will drink the water out of the toilet and then come lick you in the face, spreading the amoebas and protozoas of the toilet water on to your skin where they will then begin to spread, eventually claiming your entire body as their territory. This, obviously, is violence, or government by threat of violence and, as such, no dogs should be allowed once worldwide revolution achieves the true Anarcho-Socialist-State. 4. A dog expects to be groomed regularly. If you cease grooming the dog regularly, it will shed everywhere and stink. Again, by doing so, the dog is forcing you to obey its wishes by threat of hair everywhere (including your food and clothing) and by filling the room with a foul stench. Dogs must be abolished entirely if we are to achieve a society based upon mutual aid and cooperation, sans authority, hierarchy or threats of force. http://www.youtube.com... 5. A dog wishes to be walked. If you do not walk the dog, it will attack precious items you own, chew them and, at times, eat them. Oftentimes it chooses the items most precious to us like our first edition hardback copy of Bill O'Reilly's "Killing Lincoln", the remote control to our large plasma television, our monthly edition of the latest NRA magazine or our Green Camoflauge "Duck Commander Bible", written by Phil and Alan Robertson of the celebrated AMC show, "Ducky Dynasty." 6. Dogs are murderous. If you let a dog loose outside, and it is not so obese and air-conditioned that it cannot outrun a squirrel, should it get a hold of the squirrel it will snap its neck, slice its fur, disembowel it and slowly eat the entire squirrel in front of its crying squirrel husband and squirrel children. The same is true of champmonks, rabbits, wood lizards, beavers, seals and diminutive land-birds. Points 1-6 demonstrate that in a true anarchist society, dogs should be disallowed from entering the perimeter through well-placed barb-wire fences. Sentinel towers will be placed every 50 feet equipped with automatic rifles. Every 300 feet, a sniper tower also will be in place. Should a dog breach both the sentinel and sniper towers, a command post will be placed evey 1,000 feet with an advanced relay-system of walkie-talkies, smoke-signals and specially tuned drums which will alert one of the two defensive units we have on duty at the time (either the Berkman Imperial Guard or the Anarchist Soldiers' Sorority). These will intercept the canine and dispose of it. The burden of proof is on the Con to demonstrate why the existence of dogs is compatible with the iron will of the Anarcho-Socialist State in light of points 1-6. (Note: I could bring up more points, but I want to keep this a good, clean debate.)