5 Bible lessons they don't teach you in Sunday School

I am such an idiot. I totally forgot to mention that The Atheist Experience got into morality, in which you and your god are totally incapable of and are completely immoral, and the article is completely moral...“When you start making excuses for atrocities you have removed yourself from ANY valid discussion on morals. When you say ‘yes the bible says you can own slaves but’ well now you’re contradicting yourself because before I was asking if you thought the bible was accurately representing the mind of god, the will of god. You’ve got this conflicted mess of contradictions and you’ve found a way to rationalize them. You’ve gone and looked at them and said ‘boy that one really sounds bad, BUT that’s what Israel was doing that’s not what god was doing. So let me ask you this… do you believe that there’s an all knowing all powerful fun loving god who has an important message for humanity and he is so completely inept that his best attempts at communicating to people managed to convey the exact opposite message of what you think he meant. Now like are you the one who got it right? And all the people who authored the holy book and got you started that they managed to get it wrong? Is your god such a bumbling buffoon that he cannot state ‘thou shalt not own somebody as another human being?’ or ‘please don’t rape the people and pillage the villages around you’” and he managed to communicate so poorly that it got written down as Thou shalt be able to own other people as property and oh by the way go over there and kill everybody kill everything except for the young virgins. Its asinine. You cannot reconcile this.” Matt Dillahunty 4. Oh really? Wow. Noah took part in god destroying ALL fricken life except for 2 of each species. So it is true. He could have said “god who the f--k are you? Oh a voice in my head that doesn’t exist and that voice in my head cannot possibly be capable of committing anything like it in the first place and even if this ‘voice’ possibly could, it is clearly WRONG in doing this.” Sheesh. That’s not taught in Sunday school now is it? Adam. Sin. Nope. Am not going to argue with you on sin AGAIN. Its a proven loser from your viewpoint. 5. WHAT? Um no the verse is pretty simple and simple enough for even you to understand. Don’t ever say “implies”. K? Because that would mean that you assume. Then that would obviously mean that according to the article, its correct. “Numbers 16 is full of context that describes the wicked nature of the people being killed here.” Hey then you admit its true “5. When God doesn't like you, you're probably dead, and your death will probably be creative.” NEXT! “Elisha most likely was not bald.” “Most likely” means you don’t know, means as usual you have to invent excuses for something in which you know nothing about. It means you guess. It means you cannot take your bible at its word. It means you cannot take your god at his word (that’s a gimme and we already knew that one). You are an insult of cultural insignificance. That’s because you know NOTHING about your bible and you are making truly pathetic incorrect parapets for it that would drown anyone who knows something about it. The verses are correct as they stand and so is the interpretation. AND many atheist websites will agree as the verses are some of the most famous of them all and widely distributed… 42 children to be mauled by bears for absolutely no reason at all and NOBODY of dignity or integrity or both can possibly agree with you and how you try to snake your way around and you fricken know it. Did I say ANYWHERE where jesus killed a child? No. I didn’t. YOU DID. You brought up such a stupid remark that had absolutely NOTHING whatsoever to do with what was stated in the opening of the article. Do you not know sarcasm when you read it? OR better yet is it not known that according to your christianity the terminology of “fruit” is that of “offspring” or “infants”? Why by gum, yes it is. So KNOCK IT OFF with your complete and total ineptitude of not being able to translate YOUR fricken bible worth a god damned. Better yet… Isaiah 13:15-18 "Every one that is found shall be thrust through; and every one that is joined unto them shall fall by the sword. 16 Their children also shall be dashed to pieces before their eyes; their houses shall be spoiled, and their wives ravished. 17 Behold, I will stir up the Medes against them, which shall not regard silver; and as for gold, they shall not delight in it. 18 Their bows also shall dash the young men to pieces; and they shall have no pity on the fruit of the womb; their eye shall not spare children. Hosea 9:11-16 “As for Ephraim, their glory shall fly away like a bird, from the birth, and from the womb, and from the conception. 12 Though they bring up their children, yet will I bereave them, that there shall not be a man left: yea, woe also to them when I depart from them! 13 Ephraim, as I saw Tyrus, is planted in a pleasant place: but Ephraim shall bring forth his children to the murderer. 14 Give them, O LORD: what wilt thou give? give them a miscarrying womb and dry breasts. 15 All their wickedness is in Gilgal: for there I hated them: for the wickedness of their doings I will drive them out of mine house, I will love them no more: all their princes are revolters. 16 Ephraim is smitten, their root is dried up, they shall bear no fruit: yea, though they bring forth, yet will I slay even the beloved fruit of their womb.” Lamentations 2:20-22 “20 Behold, O LORD, and consider to whom thou hast done this. Shall the women eat their fruit, and children of a span long? shall the priest and the prophet be slain in the sanctuary of the Lord? 21 The young and the old lie on the ground in the streets: my virgins and my young men are fallen by the sword; thou hast slain them in the day of thine anger; thou hast killed, and not pitied. 22 Thou hast called as in a solemn day my terrors round about, so that in the day of the LORD'S anger none escaped nor remained: those that I have swaddled and brought up hath mine enemy consumed. I do not know if trees are not sentient and neither do you. And for you to say that they are not and single them out as such, well yah got caught. No its not illogical at all on my part because there are quite a few things that you do not know about plants and trees such as plants and trees communicate with each other. Also such as pine trees in within close proximity the parent tree nurtures the baby tree(s). You didn't know any of that. - In the Minds of Plants - Nature What plants talk aboutSo what if plants and trees are not sentient? Does that give man and your messiah the right to do whatever the f--k he wants with them just because he decides to throw an irrelevant deficient ponytailed temper tantrum? And that gives you christians the right to wipe out every living thing and take control of the planet just because genesis 1:26 says so? WRONG!!! 1.”You're telling me what is taught in churches?” Um no. YOUR church just as you said. Here’s something that you don’t get… I don’t know that much. I really don’t. But I do know 99.999% more than you on god, the bible, religion, music, and film than you ---ever--- will. Why? Because I take the time, almost on a daily basis and have for at least 42+ years (for music and film its been longer than that), for each subject just mentioned to study up and learn more and more and obtain knowledge that I haven’t known or didn’t know to enrich myself so I can nurture myself and grow. I also take the time to enjoy life, to relax, sleep, get out and do things that I can do provided that my health and money allows it. Can you say the same? Ab-so-lu-te-ly not in any way can you. if you say “yes” to that, I 100% know that you are flat out lying. I never stated , nor pretend that I know what goes on in every church. Quite the contrary Richard Nixon. Oh I get it, so you attend nearly a dozen other churches? Please stop pretending to know more than you do. Now I do 100% know this that within the bunkers of churches, there’s no common ground/ consensus/ unity. None. If you were to get someone VS you let’s say as an example in one room and let’s say you both were to have the same knowledge about your bible, which is nothing btw, and you both were to be asked to decipher the book of Nahum, you and that someone would come up with TWO, yes count em, 2 completely different answers using, well let’s go for broke and say the NIV version. How’s that? Its a pretty easy version to understand - right? I mean after all you think you are so smart. OK this debate is now finished and we---are---done. Guess what I did smart a$$eth? I googled “torah” And I looked at the first two translations and compared them with what you posted of Deuteronomy 22 23-29. And take one lucky stab in the dork as to what occurred? Well by golly gosh darned gee whiz bang gee whiz holy gum balls they---don’t---match. I mean the first one, well its not even close. The second one is a little off, but off, not much. So your charade is over thus proving you to be incorrect and you NOT doing YOUR homework at all. Sorry pigeon toes, you lose as always. Now had you done some comparisons in torah translations simply by googling the word “torah” and comparing them you would have found this fallacy. Nah. Its too much to ask you to do anything of the kind. Let this be a lesson to you to present true evidence and not a portion of it. Because later in life you will be asked to present all of it. And if you are caught with your pants down as proof point A+ positive here, then like here you will continue to have no genuine friends or loved ones and you will ALWAYS, no exceptions, fail with everything that you do. Period.