Respect should be earned

The burden of proof is shared in this debate. I would like to go back to the definition of respect in this round. The definition of respect is not, looking up to someone, or being overly nice to them. Its simply giving every person the common courtesy they deserve. The paradigm my opponent uses is destructive and circular because it sets up a role where others must first be kind to you, yet if they believe your same standard then you have to be nice to them first. This means no one ends up getting respect. I believe everyone deserves to be treated equally and with a basic level of respect. If a person disrespects you that is a different story.A snippet of a post by child of a NPD mother states:Like many abused kids, as a child I was not allowed to express anger, or even to give any outward appearance that I felt it.This meant her mother abused her, and if she showed anger about the “badness” of her mother’s abuse, she was seen as “bad”. Does that mean she is truly bad? In order to become “good”, we need to do “bad”. By doing “bad” does not mean we are “bad” or “evil”. Everyone changes. A “good” person may change to bad due to bad influences, but a bad person can change to good by good influences. So by disrespecting someone who’s bad…you’re not exactly helping them to become “good” are you? Plus, you’re not even doing an act a “good” person would do as you’re spreading that belief that it’s alright to disrespect the “bad” and let them stay “bad” forever. It is difficult for a bad to become “good” if they do not get help and are always pushed aside, their beliefs will turn into truth for them.Is it hard to respect someone? Is it hard to disrespect someone? They are equal in “hard”, it is only in your mind that one is harder because it has not been attempted for long periods of time. Utopia is only an excuse not to respect someone, because it is used as a “if”. There’s not “ifs” in respect, it’s not I will do it if, I will do that if, you just do it because if you don’t, that “if” will never occur and you’ll never learn to respect others freely.The most basic respect does not require trust, it is not personal respect. Basic respect - Have due regard for (someone"s feelings, wishes, or rights) Personal respect - A feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements.Trust must be earnt and that can lead to respect, however, you do not need to trust someone to respect someone. You may not trust the media, but by respecting the media, you don’t insult the one who did it and spread rumours in order to put the media down. You may criticize them, you may disagree with them and tell others to do so, but you do not do so in a threatening manner and make it a personal offence to the media staff.To conclude the debate, I would like to quote something from Narcissist’s child. “Curiously, while we take the position that strangers must earn our respect, we fully expect those strangers to treat us with the respect and courtesy we have made no effort to “earn” from them. It’s a one-way street in our minds—others should treat us with respect but they must earn ours—and we don’t even realize it!If you take the time to really think about it, you have to come to the conclusion that respect simply cannot be earned. No one person is sufficiently intuitive and simultaneously fluid of personality that they can divine and appropriately react to an infinite, and infinitely changing, set of demands. You cannot please all of the people all of the time—and when it comes to earning respect, you cannot even know what all of the people think you need to do.If you want to be respected, there is a simple way to achieve that: respect others. Respect their feelings, their rights, their existence. Give them respect as a matter of course and only withhold it when a specific person has done a specific thing that is worthy of withdrawing it. Set the bar high—determine that taking your respect away from a person is a serious thing, not to be taken lightly or in response to something small, like disagreeing with you politically. In fact, to my way of thinking, it is only demonstrating an ingrained lack of respect for others that warrants the withdrawal of my respect.You might consider this the next time you think another person should earn your respect rather than you giving it freely and giving him a chance to earn your disrespect instead.”