Islam is a necessity in the modern world.

I am sorry that my theory was not more well received. I admit that capturing Satan to harness his flatulence for fuel is no easy task. Currently, I am researching Arabic and Persian grimoires for methods whereby I can bind Satan to my control, but so far I have only found methods corresponding to various jinns and spirits of the planets and stars. Inshallah, I will be able to find more in time. Once I am able to summon Satan and bind him into a lamp, I will then feed him Taco Bell until he is about to burst! Then I will play a continuous loop of the call to prayer. The devil will be unable to move away, but will be unable, also, to control his malevolent gassy-pants! ERGO, I will have a siphone attached to the open part of the lamp into large canister drum. I will hire somone to seal the drum once full, then we will repeat the process until I have millions upon millions of drums of devil gas! Then these can be sent to Islamic scientists for research purposes, getting us off of evil American and Russian Kufr fossil fuel! Allah hu-akbrar! Valiya writes, "a religion that has such balderdash cannot provide any solution for mankind"! How untrue! A modern, scientific worldview which rejects the existence of a gassy Satan is no science at all, and it is certainly not modern! I would hesitate to call such assertions "balderdash", for they are clearly the holy truths of the Hadith. In my own dawah, I always begin by telling people the Islam teaches a farting Satan, whereas Christianity and Judaism do not, demonstrating the clear superiority of Islam over these wicked faiths. Someday, when science discovers evidence of the devil's flatulence, I will laugh at them in derision for disbelieving in the Hadith! When Steven Hawkwing rolls out in his wheelchair and says in robot voice, "I was wrong. The Satans fart. All the time they do it. Inshallah! Allah hu Akbar!" I ask you O Nasrani and you, O Yehudi: why does not the Injil, the Taurat and the Zabur not have farting devil? Maybe because your scribes have falsified Allah's words! Truly, a fateful doom awaits you upon the last day, for Allah hath made clear the devil has a serious case of the tubbly-wubblies in the tummy! Truly, Moses taught a farting devil, as did Jesus, and Lut, and Joseph! But you have edited these out of your records, to hide the truth from humanity! You are right, though, Valiya: Islamic economics is certainly superior to the Kufr West and Kufr East --- especially when we consider the massive diversity of wealth that exists in Daar-al-Islam vs. Daar-al-Harb. Whereas the Kufr relies predominantly upon fuel and energy for their wealth, Muslims innovates in all fields, and it has been this way for centuries. Where has most of modern technology come from? Islam! Modern medicine? Islam! The space program? Islam! Who ended slavery first? Islam! Who gave women full equal rights with men first? Islam! Who had first gay cowboy? Islam! Islam is the clearly superior deen in every way. Without Islam, the modern world would be in peril! Why do you think it is that the good Muslim, Buzz Lightyear, was first in space, and not the wicked Kufr, Tom Hanks? While Tom Hanks was stranded on island talking to a bloodied football named Wilson, Buzz Lightyear was performing wudu and salat in the sea of tranquility! Take that, you wicked gringos! Justin Timberlake is Muslim! http://www.youtube.com... http://www.youtube.com... http://www.youtube.com...