Ninja Are cooler than pirates

Alright, since my opponent was nice enough to offer numbered points, I will respond in kind. Re: #1: Since when is assassinating people and killing from the shadows honorable? Sneak attacks are not honorable, they are the opposite thereof. And yes, pirates are often drunkards. Pirates do whatever they want to do. Re: #2: I'll pretend that "bamfin" means that the weapons are awesome. I'm not sure what language that is, but it's certainly not English. Anyway. Ninjas do indeed have some pretty cool weapons, but Pirates have better ones. While ninjas are carrying over nine thousand weapons, Pirates only need to keep 2 on their person: a pistol and a cutlass. Keep in mind, too, that pirates have a ship's cannons as weapons as well. I'm fairly certain a pistol is superior to the ninja's long range weapons. And when it comes to short range weapons, the pirate's sword has a handguard, whereas the ninja's sword does not. Ninja: http://www.karatedepot.com... Pirate: http://www.swordsdirect.com... I'd prefer my hand not to get cut off during battle, thanks. Re: #3: When someone thinks of a ninja being cool, they think of a shadow-lurker who kills his victims without them even knowing he existed, not some social engineer befriending enemies. You distance yourself from the stereotyped view of ninjas at your own peril. Even so, ninjas talk like normal people. Pirates sound cool enough that they have their own talk-like-a-pirate-day [sept 19th]. Re: #4: A shame, isn't it, that ye whole audience be from that very same country, the one that hates ninja movies. So you concede, then, that at least the American public prefers Pirates to ninjas. And that's what really determines which is 'cooler,' what people think of them. Re: #5: Once again, you distance yourself from the entire ninja fan club. Without wearing black and hiding amongst the shadows, a ninja is pretty lame. The pop culture depiction of a ninja is much cooler than the normally-clothed social engineer ninja. That's not even a little cool. Re: #6: Ninjas may be cold, calculating killers, but pirates are bad@ss enough to fight their enemies with no preparation. A ninja's battle is boring. 3 seconds, and it's over. That's no fun at all. A pirate's battle is an intense struggle. It's fun to watch, and is an admirable trait of a pirate. Re: #7: I'm not even going to respond to that point, just because of how dumb it was. Crafting a scenario fit perfectly for a ninja is no fair comparison. Re: #8: Now my opponent is attempting to capitalize on your homophobia by claiming that pirates had homosexual relations with each other. Do not allow this ridiculous tactic to sway your mind. Re: #9: My opponent says pirates are drunkards. This is true, and it's one of the things that's so great about them! Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum! My opponent is now treating alcohol consumption as if it was some forbidden thing. Remember, people, a pirate does whatever he pleases, be it drinking all day and night, stealing ships, getting wooden legs and eyepatches, or sailing the seven seas. Do not let my opponent's claim that pirates are ill-behaved affect what you already know - pirates are pretty sweet. Re: #10: Ninjas won't commit atrocities... unless they're paid to do so. Yes, how honorable. Pirates won't usually pillage a town unless there's something to be gained from it. Unless they just feel like it. In which case, that makes them pretty bad mofos. Bad as in good. Ladies and gents, there are two sides here. My opponent has painted a picture of ninjas that is not even a little cool. They dress normally, they befriend their enemies with charismatic conversation, then they kill because they were paid to do so. No will of their own. Pitiful. A pirate on the other hand, does whatever he wants, because a pirate is free. And he doesn't care if your momma there, your grandmomma, innocent bystanders, little kids, baby sitters, bill collectors, whatever. He'll leave your whole block filled with hot brass if he has to, and you know why? 'Cause *HE JUST DOESN'T GIVE A ****!* *That last line was adapted from a line in The Boondocks episode "A Date with the Health Inspector." Just giving credit where it is due.