The wealthiest ten per cent of citizens should be exempted from paying tax

My family tree has just been completed and I have discovered that I am, in reality, an extremely posh personage with an aristocratic heritage - I am related to the Norwegian royal family no less, and I have duly written to the King of Norway asking him to send me a cheque for my share of the family fortune at his earliest convenience. However, when I bank this cheque I will have to pay capital gains tax on the amount, and possibly inheritance tax too, and the prospect of this is making my blue blood boil, especially as I know that my wealthy forefathers here in Britain were never required to pay any sort of tax. Indeed, back in medieval times, the paupers in rural England used to pay the nobility handsome sums for the privilege of farming the common land that used to collectively belong to them before the ruling classes annexed it all and forced the snivelling little peasants into serfdom. One of my Victorian ancestors: Lord Montmorency Wright-Farquhar Saveloy Eggleston d'Eggleston von Gobbscheit, the fifth Earl of Sunderland; famously said "The idea that the upper classes should be asked to make a financial contribution to the Government just so filthy commoners can educate their children, have access to medication and enjoy the protection of the law is as ludicrous as the idea that they should be allowed to vote." Sadly, these days working class scum not only enjoy free education and health care, paid for through taxation, but also the 'right' to elect wishy-washy, namby-pamby, bleeding-heart lefties as Members of Parliament - and this country is going to hell in a hand-cart as a result. Like most financially privileged toffs, I have an enormous sense of self-entitlement, and that's why I affirm that income tax should remain in place, but only the lower classes should pay it, and that the revenue raised from income tax should not be wasted on publicly-funded schools and hospitals but, rather, be used to replace the capital gains and inheritance taxes which are such a tedious burden on socially superior citizens, such as my good self. As my friends in the Conservative Party point out, taxing high net worth individuals drives wealth creators out of the country and into low tax regimes overseas, and because they sack their chauffeurs, valets, butlers, chefs, gardeners, sommeliers, footmen and maids as they leave, this exodus of prosperous people actually damages some of the poorest members of society - the very people those commies in the Labour Party claim to represent. The fact is, if the richest ten per cent of citizens were exempted from tax, not only would all those servants keep their jobs but rich people from abroad would be tempted to move to Britain to take advantage of our low tax policies, and employ domestic staff of their own here - which would be a fantastic boost to the economy. We can expect objections from certain quarters of the media if the Government adopts my proposal, of course, but as Conservative MP, Andrew Mitchell, recently told some upstart policemen who tried to tell him what to do "Best you learn your f------ place. You don't run this f------ government. You're f------ plebs" (1) and this is the message that must be extended to any other proles who dare to question the Government's new policy to exempt the wealthiest citizens from tax. Thank you. (1) http://www.telegraph.co.uk...