God is a serial Killer and enjoys hot chocolate

God is not a serial killer! ANd God can't like hot chocolate because he doesn't have a mouth, and if he did have a mouth, he probably enjoys things better than hot chocolate, like Grape Soda of Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster. And if god had a mouth that would mean he could get Caveties. If he could get caveties he'd have to go to a dentist. If he had a dentist that would mean SOMEone would have to have power over God, especially as they'd make God wait in the waiting room reading last years issues of Highlights. But God doesn't like that does he? If he did like it then we wouyld like it. But I don't like it. Suzy doesn't like it. Are you going to start blaming Suzy for all your troubles? Huh LM? Is Suzy at fault DO YOU HATE SUZY! See? this is exacly why why why god can't like hot chocolate. Cause if he did like Hot chocolate he'd have to hate Suzy. But he doesn't hate Suzy. Here's a direct quote FROM A BIBLE that says God did not hate Suzy: 'The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, But fools despise wisdom and instruction' Proverbs 1 : 7 Suzy scored a 2100 on her SAT and a 19 on her ACT. That sound like knowledge to me. SO she fears the lord, and the lord loves that fear. He loved Suzy so freakin much that he sent his only begotten house cat Aslan to inspire CS Lewis to write the Lord of the Rings. With out that Peter Jackson would never have made king Kong and King knog was awesome. So Awesome that even God liked it. Heres a quote from Gregory Maguires "Wicked" for more: "They're hidden. I don't know where. But everybody says so. Ask Six. I think because this used to because this used to be a waterworks headquarters - it did. Hell burns so hot they need water, and the devils tunneled up to here" Notice the part :Hell needs water. There was plenty of water in King Kong. Thats how they got a Jungle, because plants need water. If they didn't have water they'd be dead. But they aren't so they had water. Another reason against God liking Hot Chocolate 4) God made cocoa beans only grow in south america. Guess what else grew in south america? The Aztecs. The horrible, horrible Aztecs? Do you know what they do to people in Aztecland? They eat um. All kindsa ways. Stirfry, deep fry, french fri, sake and bake, pot roast, potatoe salad, lettuce salad, shrimp salad shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo. Pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried. There's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad (again), shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich. Thats about it. With so many shrimp foods, God who have to be preoccupied with those before he would even think about hot chocolate. I mean answer me honestly. Would YOU just go and reach for a cup of hot chocolate after having eatten a big plate of pineapple shrimp? Yeah, I didn't think so. Not so tough now are you tough guy? %) Hot chocolate is dangerous for god. If god doesn't have believers then there is no God. Theres a lot of christians that don't like hot chocolate. If they found out that God did like hot chocolate they would reject him like that. (snap). du du du du (snap snap) du du du du (snap snap) du du du du, du du du du, du du du du (snap snap). Christians don't like the Addams family, and last I heard, Uncle Fester loves himself a cup of hot chocolate. So along with their own personal dislike of the devils hot chocolate and the product placement via the Addams family, him liking hot chocolate would GREATLY hinder him from sending out his Jehovahs witnesses to convert me during dinner time because there would be no Jehovahs witnesses. 5) My dinner was ruined because of the Jehovahs witnesses, who for shortness will be called Trapezoids. I was about to eat my dinner. You know what my dinner was? Chicken teriaki, Garlic Bread, and langoustine en papillote with basil pesto. Did you know you can only eat that stuff on a Harvest moon? DIdja? No you did not. And I was just about to eat it, when there goes the nieghboorhood, and those friggin trapezoids come up and start asking me if I had excepted Joseph SMith into my life. I tried to tell them I had but they insisted on testing my knowledge with multiplication flash cards. I was just on 36 x 78 = 22353984 when its tomarrow and my Garlic bread was ruined for a whole year until the next harvest moon. That was prime bread mind you. I hate trapezoids for that. Did you ever stop and consider how evil the words hot chocolate are? If you hadn't, here are some other variations from different languages and you can see for yourself. chocolate caliente chocolat chaud hoad choklad cioccolato caldo heiï¿½e Schokolade hete chocolade othay ocolatechay See? We are the only language that says hot chocolate right. No other language in the world refers to hot chocolate in the right American way. Hot Chocolate is obviously causing them to speak in devils tongue. Otherwise, they'd just say HOT CHOCOLATE, like normal people. But they don't. And we all know God Blesses America. If he didn't, he'd still be in Isreal where he came from. BUT he migrated here on the Mayflower, and blessed America instead. Not SOUTH America, but America. Two different places, one great name. God hates hot chocolate. Chocolate was not made to be served hot. If it was then hot chocolate wouldn't be damned by God. But since I've more than proven it is we'll accept my words as truth, and if you don't believe me then go back to Iraq with your other terrorist buddies. But I digress. Chocolate tastes really good in ice cream, fudgsicles, klondike bars, fr4ozen hersheys, etc. And how many various ways of hot chocolate are there. ONE!!!!!!!!!! One verses five? You don't have to be a mathemetician to prove that five has more letters than one. infact, it has 1 more ltters than one does, making it better. You can't argue with that logic. And you call yourself a master? If you believe in God you can read this: I'dway ikelay otay areshay away evelationray atthay I'veway adhay uringday ymay imetay erehay. Itway amecay otay emay enwhay Iway iedtray otay assifyclay ouryay eciesspay andway Iway ealizedray atthay ou'reyay otnay actuallyway ammalsmay. Everyway ammalmay onway isthay anetplay instinctivelyway evelopsday away aturalnay equilibriumway ithway ethay urroundingsay environmentway utbay ouyay umanshay oday otnay. Ouyay ovemay otay anway areaway andway ouyay ultiplymay andway ultiplymay untilway everyway aturalnay esourceray isway onsumedcay andway ethay onlyway ayway ouyay ancay urvivesay isway otay eadspray otay anotherway areaway. Erethay isway anotherway organismway onway isthay anetplay atthay ollowsfay ethay amesay atternpay. Oday ouyay owknay atwhay itway isway? Away irusvay. Umanhay eingsbay areway away iseaseday, away ancercay ofway isthay anetplay. Ou'reyay away agueplay andway eway areway ethay urecay If you couldn't read that then you've drank'd hot chocolate sometime in your life and lost God favor. Only further proof that he hates hot chocolate. Now, in conclusion, If God like hot chocolate it would be good. It is not good so it must be bad. Bad is not good. Bad is bad. Good is Good. Bad and Good are not Good and bad, they are Bad and Good. If you are bad you are not Good. Good is not bad because if you were bad you would not be good. God is good, his name even spells good. Bad rhymes with dad. And guess who's the dad of bad? Satan. Lucifer likes Hot chocolate cuz he's hot. If the devil likes hot chocolate than God must hate it. And since satan does like the hot chocolate, God can't like it. Now, just for further emphasis, here is the words hot chocolate. If you read it enough, you'll see why its evil hot chocolate hot chocolate hot chocolate hot chocolate hot chucolate hot chocolate hot chokolate hot chocoIate not chocolate hot chocol@te hot chocolate hoY chocolate hot chocolate Also, God is not a serial killer.