How to Become a Better Roommate

# Outline 6: How to Become a Better Roommate

Use these lesson outlines in student living meetings with your tenants to help them learn apartment living principles to help them have positives living experiences at BYU-Idaho.

Become a Better Roommate

Help students learn how to see worth and value in their roommates and practice the golden rule.

Step 1: Ponder

Step 2: Discuss

Step 3: Activity

Step 4: Invite and Follow Up

Step 1: Ponder

Step 2: Discuss

Step 3: Activity

Step 4: Invite and Follow Up

Step 1: Ponder

Step 2: Discuss

Step 3: Activity

Step 4: Invite and Follow Up

## Preparation

In preparation for this meeting, read Hymn 223, "Have I Done Any Good?" and answer the following questions:

- How can you help your residents see new opportunities to become better roommates?
- How can you encourage residents to "go and do something today?"

## Discussion Options

Select one of the three options below to lead residents in a group discussion. This discussion will help residents determine how they can be better roommates. As you prepare, consider additional questions that will enhance the discussion. Remember to allow residents time to think and participate.

- Option 1
- Option 2
- Option 3

## Recognizing Value

Read the quote and answer the questions:

**"We never look at a sunset and regretfully sigh, 'Oh, I wish there were more hues of red or stronger hues of purple in this sunset. If there were only a little more orange or not so much yellow. It's a bit off-center or not quite evenly distributed.' We simply enjoy the sunset for what it is and cherish and value its distinctive beauty."** (Troy Dougherty, "The Practical Work of Building Zion in Your Apartments and Homes," **BYU Idaho Devotional**, January 21, 2014.

- How does this quote shape the way we look at others?
- What is the purpose of pointing out differences or perceived errors in others? What about accentuating their positives?
- What are some behaviors that should be overlooked? What should not be overlooked?
- Think of a person who loves you when you're not at your best. What specific things do they do to help you feel valued?

## The Golden Rule

Read Matthew 7:12 and watch the video then discuss the following questions: 

- Discuss each student's approach to curfew. What makes each approach right or wrong? How would you counsel them if they were your roommates?
- How would you apply the Golden Rule in this situation if you were one of the students in the video?
- Introduce other apartment or roommate scenarios that may represent points of conflict. Discuss how the Golden Rule can be applied to each scenario. How can this teaching of the Savior transform our attitudes, communication, and, ultimately, our behavior?

## Be Involved

Read the quote and watch the video, then discuss the following questions: 
 
**"I noticed three small daily practices helped apartments have greater unity. Of course, everyone's schedules are busy and different. But, when you can, please consider making time as roommates to: 1) kneel and pray together, perhaps in the morning or evening; 2) periodically eat together; talk and laugh as you do so; and 3) keep a current copy of the Ensign (soon to be Liahona) in an open place in your apartment, a reminder that the words of the living prophets and apostles can influence for the better our living environment.** 
 
**"Would you like greater peace, harmony, unity in your apartment and in your life? Better focus, and better grades? A temple-like spiritual feel where you live? If so, please nurture a living environment that invites the Spirit and makes you smile as you take care of each other."** (Elder Gerrit W. Gong, "Things Expedient to Understand,"**BYU-Idaho Devotional**, October 20, 2020. 

- How do you plan to follow through with Elder Gong's invitations?
- How can being involved in each other's lives unite an apartment? What role does this play in building Zion in your apartment?
- Discuss some activities or traditions you can propose to do with roommates.

## Activity

This activity is intended to help residents identify how they can become better roommates. Break into small groups to do the following exercise then come back together and discuss what was learned.

- Give each group a piece of paper. Have them write characteristics that embody a good roommate. Have them discuss how they could be that kind of roommate.
- What keeps residents back from becoming that roommate/embodying those characteristics or putting the effort into being the best roommate they can be?
- Have each group member share a characteristic that they want to work on this week. Invite the group to discuss what each member could do to develop that goal during the week.

## Invite and Follow Up

Invite everyone to thank their roommate for a positive quality that they see in them this week. Follow up in person, email, or text on their experiences.