Review: of crucifixion 
Sentiment: negative

Review: to match the ordeal of sitting through it 
Sentiment: negative

Review: endless rain is offset by the sheer ugliness of everything else 
Sentiment: negative

Review: then knock yourself out and enjoy the big screen postcard that is a self-glorified martin lawrence lovefest . 
Sentiment: negative


Review: becomes compulsively watchable in a guilty-pleasure , daytime-drama sort of fashion