Review: is a total misfire . 
Sentiment: negative

Review: no clue about making a movie 
Sentiment: negative

Review: a sleep-inducingly slow-paced crime drama 
Sentiment: negative

Review: glucose sentimentality and 
Sentiment: negative


Review: if it wants to be a retro-refitting exercise in campy recall for older fans or a silly , nickelodeon-esque kiddie flick