Review: skip this turd and pick your nose instead because you 're sure to get more out of the latter experience . 
Sentiment: negative

Review: to its inevitable tragic conclusion 
Sentiment: negative

Review: the film 's hero is a bore 
Sentiment: negative

Review: , meandering , and sometimes dry 
Sentiment: negative


Review: sustains its dreamlike glide through a succession of cheesy coincidences and voluptuous cheap effects , not the least of which is rebecca romijn-stamos .