text: I have to go IKEA shitnnLet me break it down for you I love IKEA I think they have a lot of great items and are priced nicely I also dig Scandinavian style and profess a minimalist attitude towards all things So I get it IKEA is cool for the most part and I have a lot of stuff from this megastore What I do not like about IKEA is their physical store setup I hate being forced into the showroom I do not want to walk Odins path or travel the way of the great Vikings Consumers of the past I just want a curtain rod and a curtain THAT IS IT After fighting my way through the hordes of people and peasants alike I fought my way through to the marketplace nnchecklist outwritten in blood on a dried deer skinnn curtain rodn curtain rod attachments for the walln oh do not forget the curtainnnAs I make my way past screaming kids couples arguing over a FauxPainting and through the warehouse full of prefabricated assemble required plan about hours on a Saturday to complete furnitureI go to self checkoutYes I am Free hours laternnI did it I have my curtain I need I will install this now as hang sounds gay So I install my curtain I realize wow this helps to reduce the suns infiltration into my soul and think my other room would benefit from a curtain as well This means insert Darth Vader March music here another trip to IKEAnnThis time however I have a plan I will go through the checkout area through the warehouse and totally bypass the showroom Fuck IKEA I am not a lemming easily led through a retail smorgasbord Even if they had aquavit and salmon gravlax waiting for me I would still go through the Swedish backdoor nnI make my way in and repeat the above steps and I am out in minutes I have to say this must be some sort of world record nnAll in all you can defeat IKEA you just need to be sneaky and quick you have to focus and avoid any contact with people once in the store Upon arriving home I go to install this other curtain and to really manify the situation and to degay the whole weekend experience of shopping for window trimmings I put the Redsox game on they won in innings and make it as tough of experience as installing a curtain can benn Not that there is anything wrong with that