text: Shulas tries to combine upscale steakhouse with football to disastrous though frequently hilarious resultsnnThey take you on a tour before seating you showing you a replica Lombardi trophy and telling you all about the Dolphins undefeated season I found it especially hysterical the hostess took extra care to point out this trophy is a replica You mean the real Lombardi trophy is not kept at a steakhouse inside a shitty Indian casino in Chandler AZ Shocking Equally entertaining was how the hostess kept droning on about the Dolphins long after we made it clear we did not care Um lady It is just me and female coworkers We are all hungry and none of us give a shit about the Dolphins Apparently we were also supposed to be impressed by the blackandwhite pictures of the Dolphins on the walls Oooh blackandwhite pictures how artsy Someone took a couple photography classes at community collegennAfter concluding that fascinating tour we were finally taken to our table We were all exchanging that was weird looks when the waitress handed us our drink menus and explained the steak menu was painted on the football she was carrying I know what you are thinking and the answer is yes it was a regulation sized football and yes it was hand painted She made sure to mention this last fact twice I mean what kind of upscale steakhouse would it be if its steak menu was painted on a football by a MACHINE Pish poshnnAnyway that is when things went from amusing to I will never set foot in this restaurant again The hostess puts the football on a tee and sets it down RIGHT ON MY COWORKERS PLATE Gross I wish I had taken a picture cuz the look on her face was PRICELESS The waitress seemed shocked and somewhat offended she asked for another plate The nervennAnd this my friends was the straw that broke the proverbial Dolphins back I can handle being bored to death by an overenthusiastic hostess I can handle my menus hand painted on footballs But if you have the nerve to charge for a steak as this supposedly upscale steakhouse does I will not tolerate a dirty football on my plate nor being treated like asking for a clean plate is an outrageous requestnnWe left without even drinking our waters