text: I think Margaritaville exists only to give others what a prelude of what Hell if it indeed exists would be like consuming overpriced coconut shrimp and other seafood cliches while the same four or five songs are pumped through the sound system with accompanying video because nothing whets your appetite like seeing senile rock stars struggling through a live performancennThe food looks and tastes like a Red Lobster menu with a makeover It is the same garbage you have eaten at every other seafood restaurant ever except this time the dishes have clever references to Jimmy Buffet songs in their namennWhats the difference between the Cheeseburger In Paradise and a Whopper Five bucksnnEvery drink contains sweet and sour mix I swear to god even my pina colada had a greenish tint to it nnOn busy nights they hire clowns and stilt walkers who sing along to the songs and even add in their own words Sometimes they walk to your table and shoot fake ketchup at you At least you know why the food is overpriced rightnnAs if all these crimes against decency are not enough if you end up having to wait for a table you are encouraged to browse the gift shop where for the cost of your dinner you can get a shirt depicting a parrot interpreting the lyrics of the very song you have been forced to listen to all night nnWheres a White Castle when you need one