text: Where do I even begin to describe the atrocity that is the Hotel De Paris I once stayed in a hostel in Cambodia and awoke to a rat gnawing gently at my face and strangely this experience was not nearly as troubling as my experience at the HDP nnUpon arrival you enter a cheery converted Victorian mansion tastefully done in muted pastels and with plenty of exposed refinished wood to greet you and for a brief moment you feel that you may have found the best deal in Montrealbut then you are quickly relocated to their other heritage building or WOULD block as we heard it lovingly referred to by a fellow travellernnWe were told that there was a problem in our booking and that they were unable to accommodate the original terms of the booking but that they had vacancy in their second heritage building and that essentially we had to accept this or could find other accommodation Seeing that we were staying on a Saturday during the May long weekend and had previously scoured the city for other vacancies we were not in a negotiating positionnnWe drove the short two minutes to the second building and could not find it We then saw a small sign indicating that we were in fact smack in front of it but this could not be There was trash strewn in all directions at the entrance and the door that was supposed to be locked was flung open haphazardly After descending the few steps to our new subterranean chamber we tentatively entered and were greeted with a pungent mix of body odour hairspray and urine It was also suffocatingly humid and even the walls appeared to be sweating in revulsion We slithered our way to dorm K where I was astonished to see what appeared to be an old cold storage room stacked with multiple rickety bunk beds Now to say that three people would have been comfortable in such a space would be fair but twelve There was absolutely nowhere to store luggageI ended up sleeping with my backpack and using it as a makeshift pillow do to the fact that the provided pillow was caked with an indeterminable black dusting It was quickly noted that two of the four washrooms on the unit were out of order the third would quickly follow We calculated that there were approximately three washrooms for upwards of thirty people I made several calls to the front desk to alert them to the potential revolt that they would almost certainly have when fellow travellers would be returning from their nights of debauchery in Canadas sin city yet despite this act of civic duty on my behalf no attempt was made to rectify the situation It was not until the following mid afternoon as we were preparing to check out that I saw a housekeeper gingerly approach with a mop and plunger in hand Evidently she knew what to expect I certainly wish we did nnNow it is important to stress that I do not have a personal vendetta or any ill will toward the HDP I simply feel the strong need to make people aware that they should never ever consider staying herennIt baffles me that such a place continues to operate in a pseudo successful manner They must bank on the fact that those spending any time in HDP are so traumatized by their experiences that they vow to never speak of it again and hence do not spread the word that it should be avoided at all costs In writing this very lengthy review it was my vow to break this silence and hope that it may deter others from spending their hard earned dollars here