Anonymous-EmpathyAI/Distortion-Analysis-PACLIC39 huggingface dataset:
I am a 4.0 student at a very good college, and honestly I know in my heart that my life has not been horrible. When I was a toddler, my father says he physically abused me, and when I was three my parents divorced. My mother went through a slew of husbands, most of them nice people, one man not so much, he was abusive to my mother, did drugs, and killed my dog in front of me, but apart from hearing the fighting and being scared, it wasn’t as bad as it could have been. This man and my mother had a child when I was 12, and from that time on, I mostly took care of her, while my mom was gone working for days away, and eventually I was decided to home school so that I would be home to care for her while my mom would leave for almost full weeks at a time.

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}
Hi! I’m a young teen, and I have depression, that I suppose is kinda severe, General and Social anxiety. Around 2 years ago I was put on anti depressants, which have worked pretty well. Around a year ago, I abruptly stopped taking them without really telling anyone. I’m not really sure why, but I did. This was around the holidays, and I was on vacation with family friends in a vacation house owned by some of their relatives. Now, it was a beach house, and, being the middle of winter and family meant that it had not been cleaned beforehand. I was originally sleeping with my friend, but moved to my mom’s bed. My father passed away when I was 9, which caused some underlying anxiety to get worse, along with the typical grief and depression. I slept ok for the first night, but on the second night, I could not relax. It was storming, and an outside swinging door was banging on the wall. This put me on edge. There was one or two old stains on the sheets, and because of that, I started picturing bed bugs or whatever in the bed. (Not hallucinating, just imagining). I then started to get the “bugs crawling on you” feeling, and started sobbing and babbling nonsense. I tend to do that when I get panicked. After around 15 or so minutes, my mom gave me my prescribed lorazapram, and I calmed down and went to sleep. The worst part was when I was on the 5 or so hour drive home. We have a minivan, and I like to sit in the way back to have more space to spread out. My younger sister, 9 at the time, was sitting in front of me. I’m not sure how it started, but for what seemed like most of the drive, I was having a panic attack. But it was different. I also was hitting my sister, hard enough to hurt her, screaming nonsense, and basically having a tantrum. We live in a historical area, and while we passed signs for places I had been, I started yelling at my mom to go to the places. I really have no clue why. It was horrible. I was basically curled up in a ball, screaming and hitting my sister for at least an hour. I really can’t remember much. I’ve had other episodes like this, but not this bad.

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}
In the last three years I’ve been in therapy with two different psychologists for social anxiety. The fact is, I’ve noticed something’s wrong with me. I believe I may have BPD, because I’ve always had many problems with abandonment, instability of relationships and mood swings, and I also meet all the symptoms of the disorder(even substance abuse and self harm).I’ve always had a confuse sense of identity,I’ve never really known who I was, and experienced dissociation and depersonalisation since the age of 11. I identify as nonbinary even though I was born female, but I know this could be a consequence of BPD.My therapist doesn’t know about my condition because she just keeps asking me only about my anxiety and everytime I try to tell her something of the above she seems to not be even listening to me. I’m writing this because recently something changed.I’ve always had very different personalities depending from who I was with, but it’s been a while since I started losing connection with reality and I can’t tell what’s real anymore.I have nightmares and most of the days I don’t know if what I experience is real or not.I see the younger me as a weak, pathetic girl who knew nothing about anything but I don’t even remember how she was or what she liked. There’s this other part of me, though, called Chrissie. She’s a childish girl who is always cheerful and behave like a psycho,I can sense her voice in my head(not like an hallucynation, just an inner voice different from mine – sometimes we have conversations)that always suggests me to do impulsive things like beating the ones who treat me badly or saying mean things.There are days when something happens and I start to feel anxious, so she takes control and I start to act so differently that the people around me ask me if I’m high or something. Since Chrissie appeared I made some researches and learnt about DID. I’m very unsure about the amnesia that should incurr though, because I happen to be co-present when she takes control, but she does what she wants and I later feel like someone else has controlled my body even though I know what happened.When I dissociate while I’m writing something I can’t remember later what I was writing before, and I noticed I have very few memories of my life before my 14th birthday, but nothing more than this.

Cognitive distortion: Mind Reading
Distorted part: {'text': ['My therapist doesn’t know about my condition because she just keeps asking me only about my anxiety and everytime I try to tell her something of the above she seems to not be even listening to me.'], 'answer_start': [617]}
I am a 21 old girl. I am currently in my third year at university and it’s taking a huge toll on my mental health, so much so that I have contemplated dropping out. I currently live very far from home and I have been homesick. However, my homesickness has nothing to do with missing my family and friends (not particularly), I just miss not being in university, it’s incredibly stressful; I have a part-time job which causes me extreme anxiety. I have had a severe form of social anxiety for as long as I can remember. I am terrified of people talking to me or having to talk to people and it’s a huge issue when it comes to my job. I think about it every single day even if I only work a couple of times a month. I have obsessive thoughts every single day, about my job, about my weight, my friends, my studies in university. Sometimes it gets too overwhelming. i self-harm at least once a week and take great pleasure in it. I have thought about killing myself several times, sometimes it’s really overwhelming, I go through phases where I don’t see the purpose in life anymore and it really scares me. I am seeing a therapist but he is not very helpful at all, but I am too anxious to tell him I don’t want to see him anymore. I have been struggling with my sexuality for a long time. My parents and most of my friends are too homophobic to understand, but I came out as bisexual to one of them and she’s been quite nice. I have never had sex and the idea of it scares me. It’s not that I don’t have a sexual drive, I am just incredibly anxious about sharing my body with somebody else. I have met a few guys but I can’t even bring myself to even take their shirt off. The only times I have been close is when I was really drunk. I feel too self-conscious. I believe I am in love with one of my friends but she’s straight so it could never happen. It destroys me on a daily basis. Nothing is going well and all I want to do is drink and drink. I smoke and drink too much but it’s the only thing that helps.

Cognitive distortion: Mental filter
Distorted part: {'text': ['I have obsessive thoughts every single day, about my job, about my weight, my friends, my studies in university.'], 'answer_start': [715]}
This issue never plagued me until midway through high school. I have never cut or tried to harm myself in any way. In middle school, I had a friend who battled depression and would cut herself. However, the issue finally started one day when I found a video that talked about a fan of a band who was so crazy for them that she had cut one of the band member’s name into her arm. It didn’t affect me as much at first, and only left me thinking about why anybody would do such a thing. When the video showed the photo of the cut arm, that’s when it hit.

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}
From the U.S.: My husband always needed advise about everything including our relationship from people that he did not know personally but via third person and would talk over the phone. His family and elder brother lived in India. He always showed them that he was not happy but would be different when he was with me. He never worked during our less than a year marriage due to his immigrant status. He was verbally abusive and tried to control everything.

Cognitive distortion: Overgeneralization
Distorted part: {'text': ['He was verbally abusive and tried to control everything.'], 'answer_start': [402]}
Hi. Last year, I became totally paranoid about my mother, if she’s cheating on my dad. That all started with a intimate happy new year wish text of a friend of my dad. I was suffering from paranoid for 3 months though I didn’t have any, any clues expect them texting and my mother deleting his texts. (which just happened 3 times) Then I talked to my mother and found out how silly I were. I was so ashamed of my paranoia. It ended there but a few days ago me and my mom were on a trip and she bought a box of a not special cookie. She didn’t mention for who she bought that and when I told here these cookies are not delicious, she told me they’re fine to bring to work for colleagues. (I also remember earlier she has told me that she has to buy these, and I’m not sure if she mentioned that sb asked her to buy them for him/her or not) When packing, she also kept the store’s bag. and that was when I remembered she didn’t want her colleagues to know she was on a trip. The paranoia started. It couldn’t be for the colleagues. All of the terrible feelings from last year came rushing to my head. Does she have a secret friend? She didn’t buy anything worthy (but she did buy some expensive gifts for my father) but the idea of my mom buying a gift for a man had made me desperate since we’re back. I also suffer from anxiety and in the last year and 2 years ago I’ve became really paranoid, about being pregnant without penetration, about my boyfriend cheating and about my mom cheating, and all were false. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know if I’m right about being paranoid and should do something about my mom, or I’m sick. Please help me.

Cognitive distortion: Mental filter
Distorted part: {'text': ['I also suffer from anxiety and in the last year and 2 years ago I’ve became really paranoid, about being pregnant without penetration, about my boyfriend cheating and about my mom cheating, and all were false.'], 'answer_start': [1301]}
I began feeling depressed in 2005. But the worst thing in my life was getting panic attacks. Wherever I had one I stopped going there. Went to see the psychiatrist and gave me anti-depressant and Xanax which helped. But I became so scared of having panic attacks I have shut myself in my home and can’t go anywhere. Is this still due to depression, panic attacks or something else. Thanks.

Cognitive distortion: Fortune-telling
Distorted part: {'text': ['But I became so scared of having panic attacks I have shut myself in my home and can’t go anywhere.'], 'answer_start': [217]}
I grew up in a home with an alcoholic father who used to tell me every single day that I am a piece of sh* and I will fail in life, grandparent who used to tell me nobody will ever love me, and a mother who would pass condescending remarks about my looks. I spent year defying their words, in words and in action, not believing them and being filled with anger and feeling of injustice that they talked to me like this. Now my mother constantly tells me how pretty I am, I have managed to get to a place in life that has always been my goal. But with every year my self-esteem is spiraling downwards, the voices that say I will fail and I amount to nothing are haunting me but I can’t find the grit from my teen years to shut them up. I don’t understand, I went through the worst full of pride and feeling of self worth despite all the nasty words and experiences and now I’m where I wanted to be and I’m crumbling under the weight of self-loathing and anxiety. I have visited therapists and can more or less manage and get out of episodes of depression and anxiety (although it takes at least a couple of weeks each time), but they keep coming back and every time another piece of my self-esteem is chipped away for good. Why was I stronger then?

Cognitive distortion: Mental filter
Distorted part: {'text': ['But with every year my self-esteem is spiraling downwards, the voices that say I will fail and I amount to nothing are haunting me but I can’t find the grit from my teen years to shut them up.'], 'answer_start': [542]}
I’ve been dating the same guy for two years since we were 16. We decided to break up for a bit because we were both going through a lot and we wanted to be able to focus more on school etc. We still act like we are a couple and tell each other we love each other, but we don’t date other people. We have become so incredibly close, I can say anything to him – and I would do anything for him, I have so much love for him.

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}
I don’t know where to even to begin to tell you my problem. The last 3, maybe 4 months has been a living hell for me. I fell in love for the first time to a girl named Samantha. Before my falling in love, she became my first girlfriend on Nov 22. Nov 23 I had my first kiss. This is not my reason for falling in love with her. she was and still is the only girl that has ever basically talked nice to me and has shown interest in me. i was the happiest guy in the world it seemed.

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}
I am having a difficult time dealing with my past abusive relationship. My ex, who I was with for two years was emotionally and sexually abusive. I ended the relationship almost a year ago but am still having a hard time. I occasionally have flashbacks and get frightened or angry and cant stop thinking about what happened. I feel guilty for being so upset because there are other people whose experiences are so, so much worse than mine, but I am still having a hard time getting over it. I am now with a really amazing man who knows about what happened. He really tries to be supportive, but has a difficult time understanding. He gets angry because he doesn’t understand why I allowed someone to do that to me for so long. He thinks that I stayed for so long because I actually enjoyed being sexually abused, and although he doesn’t mean to, he makes me feel like he thinks I am disgusting. He also says that it feels dirty and wrong to instigate anything intimate with me, because unless I initiate it, he feels like I won’t tell him if it’s something I don’t want. He tries so hard to keep me from feeling like I have to do anything and is so worried about making me feel the way that my ex did that I’m afraid to tell him when something he does triggers me, because even though I assure him he has done nothing wrong, he still feels like it’s his fault. I don’t know how to talk to him without us both feeling like horrible people and I don’t know how to get over what happened when I feel like it’s invalid for me to be upset at all about what happened, since it wasn’t as bad as what many people experience.

Cognitive distortion: Mind Reading
Distorted part: {'text': ['He thinks that I stayed for so long because I actually enjoyed being sexually abused, and although he doesn’t mean to, he makes me feel like he thinks I am disgusting. '], 'answer_start': [727]}
From a teen in the Phillipines: I am diagnosed with Adjustment disorder with depressed mood for a year and am still currently taking medications for it. Sometimes I feel that the medications do not work at all and still feel depressed. However, there are also times that I feel like I am getting over it.

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}
It maybe started about four or five months ago, when I found a video online named “2 guys 1 hammer” or something like that. I watched it because of curiosity right? at first I cringed. I clicked off and never went back, two weeks later without thinking about it, it popped in my head during health. I went home and hopped on live leak and spent hours on it, for some reason I felt addicted to these videos, I’ve become very desensitized and I only care about few people, then, I started to like(and or love) the look of blood, I looked on tumblr and images of bloody noses or bloody mouths and knuckles, and then I started punching my walls and tried to hurt them just because it looked cool to me, it’s sort of worrying me as I am just 13, and I’m not sure if I wanna tell my parents since i’m in therapy and I already have low self esteem and fear of talking in front of people. I’m very anti-social and hate talking about these things so I decided to do it here.

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}
I don’t really know I haven’t been diagnosed I just don’t feel normal. I feel like my whole life probably mainly since the start of school I’ve struggled to connect with people and be myself. I feel like I’ve always been SO focused on what other people think and I just feel so awkward most of the time. I try and force myself to change and it comes of worse. I have people I can talk to but I feel like I’ve never had a friendship that I feel completely comfortable in. I think I have social anxiety mixed with other stuff. I just don’t feel normal. Had a boy that liked me and I really liked him recently and we had great chats over text, felt really close but in person I felt anxious and I just couldn’t open up and I hate myself for it, so it didn’t work out. I just want to be free and live to be honest. Ok so heres my question. Ive had 3 sessions with a psychologist so far and I feel like it wasn’t how I expected. I kind of really want to see a psychiatrist and try some medication but my parents are really against that, but they don’t see how desperate I am- Im way to scared to tell them I have suicidal thoughts a lot because I know they do so much for me, I just feel really desperate and want to try out medication so I’m just wondering if you can offer some advice on what approach I should take to this situation. Thankyou. P.S I know this is not a crisis hotline. I’ve had thoughts from time to time but I don’t think I could do that to my parents. I just mainly want advice on the whole medication thing.

Cognitive distortion: Mind Reading
Distorted part: {'text': ['I feel like I’ve always been SO focused on what other people think and I just feel so awkward most of the time.'], 'answer_start': [192]}
I am unmotivated and I feel lazy all the time. I procrastinate all my school work and I have no sense of time management of all. I daydream all the time about the far future. I can be very social sometimes, but over the past two years I have become extremely detached. I do well in social situations, I just choose not to engage in them. I lie all the time, sometimes for no good reason. I have a father who was physically abusive to my mom and sister and I hate him for it but it doesn’t really bother me anymore since he lives in another country. I don’t feel sympathy when bad things happen to my friends. I’m fairly certain that if one of my closest friends died I wouldn’t feel bad at all. I often harbor violent thoughts when it comes to people I hate, such as my father’s mistress. Also, I’ve never wanted to get married. A lot of my friends dream about the day they would get married and their future husbands and kids, but for some reason it’s never appealed to me at all. The notion of sex and any form of intimate relationship does not interest me. I think there is something seriously wrong with me. I’ve had this feeling for a long time now, I just never reached out to ask anyone because I was scared. Am I depressed? Are the issues that I have able to be resolved, or am I just “wired”wrong? I’m really starting to hate myself because my personality just has so many flaws. I don’t think I’m a good person.

Cognitive distortion: Overgeneralization
Distorted part: {'text': ['I am unmotivated and I feel lazy all the time. I procrastinate all my school work and I have no sense of time management of all. '], 'answer_start': [0]}
From Australia: My Fiance and I have been together for 3 years. During this time his mother and step father have manipulated him to give them money to pay for their addictions (drinking, gambling, smoking). When he doesn’t do it the mother in law threatens to kill herself. After 2.5 years I begged him to stop and he did for a short time. Now I have stepped away from his family as I can’t bare to be around them and this has caused conflict between my fiance and I. He seems confused as to why I don’t want to have them in my life. However, during multiple occasions his mother has verbally assaulted me and financially affected us.

Cognitive distortion: Mind Reading
Distorted part: {'text': ['He seems confused as to why I don’t want to have them in my life.'], 'answer_start': [468]}
From a teen in England: My girlfriend is worried I’ll hit her, It’s not because I’m overly violent, she’s had abusive relationships in the past and so because I can get angry easily (at others — somehow I can stay calm with her) she worries that I’ll lose my temper and hurt her. I know I won’t, but I want to try and prove it to her. I love her and I know I could never hurt her in any way, I love her too much.

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}
I have very bad trust issues, I was in a relationship in 2007 where I was always cheated on, I had a child while in this relationship. Since then i have left, I was single after that for awhile. I started a new relationship with a childhood friend that lasted three years from that relationship we have a beautiful two-year old daughter, we are not together anymore, because of my trust issues, I know that this problem is standing in the way of our happiness, I have never caught my child’s father doing anything in that matter. this is why I have pushed him away, I do not want to be hurt like that again, and I know he wouldn’t do anything to hurt his family, I am currently pregnant with our second child, he wants to be here for us but I need help with this.. How can I trust again? (From Canada)

Cognitive distortion: Overgeneralization
Distorted part: {'text': ['Since then i have left, I was single after that for awhile. I started a new relationship with a childhood friend that lasted three years from that relationship we have a beautiful two-year old daughter, we are not together anymore, because of my trust issues, I know that this problem is standing in the way of our happiness, I have never caught my child’s father doing anything in that matter.'], 'answer_start': [135]}
I need to break out of cyclic depressive problem but humiliated to seek help. I believe that I am suffering from severe depression (and the site’s test also implies this), but cannot bring myself to seek help. Any time I have sought help recently or at a similar episode in the past, I have been unable to achieve anything from those I have approached, and have ended up feeling worse in the long-term. In a breakdown recently I tried to explain my symptoms to my mother, but was so worried about upsetting her that I only managed half-truths. She reassured me that I am just very tired, not feeling well (have been suffering from fluey symptoms recently) and just feeling a bit emotional. This helped a little bit, but things were back the way they had been in the morning.

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}