Anonymous-EmpathyAI/Distortion-Analysis-PACLIC39 huggingface dataset:
From a 19-year-old woman in the U.S.: I am experiencing a number of problems, I have never seen a psychologist, and I would like to receive some input as to the nature of my state: I have had voices inside of my head for quite a time now. Note: These are not external voices. They are simply internal voices that feel separate from my own thoughts. This is what confuses me, what is the difference between internal and external voices? I do not feel that I have control over them, and in fact, often they take control over me. There are three thus far:

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}
Hello, I apologize if this appears jumbled, I feel there’s a lot I need to add! I would like to know whether these symptoms may be pointing towards Bipolar disorder. I was diagnosed with Social Anxiety about 6 years ago. Since then, I’ve gotten married, moved cities and went to university. I’ve also had periods of depression, and auditory hallucinations. During the past three years (noticed it more recently) I’ve been irritable, feeling high and low. Irritable, in the sense that I lash out at my husband for no reason. I just suddenly get angry — when he hasn’t done anything- and start shouting. After, I feel an immense sense of guilt and I will often break down in tears. Other times, I have these sorts of daydreams — but they feel more real than daydreams, if that makes sense. The best way I can describe it is I’ll get an idea in my head and I’ll get lost in it — it can range from anything, a recent example was the idea of being in a famous band. In reality, I couldn’t do such a thing due to being so timid. In this sense I also overestimate my abilities, in believing that I can get anything done just because. When it doesn’t happen the way I imagined, I’ll become depressed and feel generally hopeless, useless. If it is of any use, my grandmother had Bipolar. I apologize if this was muddled, but I’m not sure whether I should refer to a doctor or not, or if what I am experiencing is related to Bipolar at all. Thank you for your time! (age 21, from New Zealand)

Cognitive distortion: Mental filter
Distorted part: {'text': ['When it doesn’t happen the way I imagined, I’ll become depressed and feel generally hopeless, useless. '], 'answer_start': [1127]}
From an 18 year old woman in the U.S.: I used to be a talkative outgoing person that would communicate with others and had the ability of making friends. My freshman year in high school I had the most friends. I talked to a lot of people had great energy. I was happy most of the time and would be myself with my friends. I had the best of times.

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}
My spouse and I have been living apart since day 1, living in different states. He battles issues of addiction, but seems to be fine with kicking the drug piece. Alcohol is still heavily involved. He moved away in with his sister 1,000 miles away to escape the problems faced here and restart his life. He eventually married me after 3 years of dating. He hasnt started a new career, couldnt get into the military, so I want him home. He is worried that moving back will bring back bad habbits, when I feel it was just escapism and more a bandaid verus getting to the issues as drinking is still an issue. He feels most comfortable with his sister, my job is stationary my career being 10 years strong with the federal government, I dont see the need to move when he only works in a bar (of all places) but doesnt fully support himself. I feel his mind races and he has coping issues and learning how to move stuff in the past. He had issues with his parents, being mixed race. Now I want him home, I know we have things to work on, but he is more terrified of facing the area where the issues with drugs were. He is up and down, agreed to move back but still having issues with facing the area and the people. His alcohol consumption is terrible, through the roof at least 5 drinks per day and sometimes can finish a gallon in as little as 2 days. I don’t know what to do, how to start dealing with this, I know he has to make the choice, but I don’t know what I can say. I am accused of not understanding, I ask why he flew back to marry me. But I can’t seem to separate him from his sister (who is in the military). There are a few issues yes, but I feel I can’t do much when my sleep is interrupted and I am 1,000 miles away. I’m dealing with his addiction, childish fear and not wanting to leave his old go to person and start our lives, I’m ready to throw in the towel but don’t want to leave.

Cognitive distortion: Personalization
Distorted part: {'text': ['I don’t know what to do, how to start dealing with this, I know he has to make the choice, but I don’t know what I can say. I am accused of not understanding, I ask why he flew back to marry me.'], 'answer_start': [1349]}
From 15-year-old girl in Canada: Recently I felt like my parents really hate me. One thing I noticed is that they are letting my brother go into the career path he wants to go into but not me. I am interested in fashion and want to have a career in it, but my parents think otherwise. My dad usually calls me an idiot or stupid and says that my brother is smarter and brighter than me when I have a straight A average and am on high honor roll at school. But they still think I am incompetent for anything. My mother didn’t call me stupid or anything.

Cognitive distortion: Mind Reading
Distorted part: {'text': ['Recently I felt like my parents really hate me. '], 'answer_start': [33]}
Since I was younger child I recall having a weird episode at night that distracts me from sleeping; this involves surges of anger throughout my body. However I feel incredibly numb physically, and heavy in all of my body. To cope with this, when younger, I would kick and scream in my bed until I finally would “pass out” (or fall asleep without intending to.) Now, I harm myself through punching, scratching, cursing at myself etc until I repeat “passing out.” This doesn’t happen every night, it’s occasional — but I don’t know what it is and I’ve never had chance to speak about it to anyone, however I’m studying psychology and discovering about mental issues, and I would like to resolve whatever these “episodes” are, or at least understand them. I have already been diagnosed with depression; I feel I have underlying issues excluding depression which are more psychotic however again I haven’t spoken to anyone about them (including my therapist) as I am worried they may not believe me or I would look stupid in telling them what I feel and think.

Cognitive distortion: Mind Reading
Distorted part: {'text': [' I feel I have underlying issues excluding depression which are more psychotic however again I haven’t spoken to anyone about them (including my therapist) as I am worried they may not believe me or I would look stupid in telling them what I feel and think.'], 'answer_start': [800]}
From the U.S.: I am writing to you because the animosity between my family and my boyfriend has been taken to the next level and even involved the police. My dad and brother have always disliked my boyfriend because they think he is disrespectful and irresponsible. My mom loves him because she sees the sweetheart side of him and knows how happy he makes me.

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}
I think I might need help. For as long as I can remember I’ve always been depressed. I just shrugged it off as boredom till I got into highschool and I decided to actually accept it as depression. I don’t know why I’m depressed. Maybe I don’t even have a reason but it’s just how I feel. I’ve attempted suicide a couple times before but I just couldn’t do it. All I ever think about is dying but I think I’m getting worse. Because I’ve started having thoughts about hurting others as well. Not that I would do such a thing! I abhor violence and wouldn’t even hurt a fly. However a couple years ago I had a kind of mental breakdown. I’m night owl you see, so for some reason one night I just started freaking out. I was extremely paranoid for no reason. I was so scared of something that I started carrying a knife with me to protect myself. After a couple weeks of this I stopped. But, with these new thoughts I’m having, I’m worried that if I have another breakdown I might hurt someone. I’m scaring myself. Recently several people close to me have died and I’m not even bothered by it. I didn’t cry or get upset, I didn’t even act surprised. I mean I accept death as an inevitable but these were people close to me, shouldn’t I be the least bit sad? I’m not sure what I should do. Do I have a problem and/or should I get help? (age 18, from US)

Cognitive distortion: Mental filter
Distorted part: {'text': ['For as long as I can remember I’ve always been depressed. '], 'answer_start': [27]}
Hi, Recently I’ve been dealing with intrusive thoughts and anxiety, but this is another matter. However, one thing giving tremendous guilt is that I’ve recently remembered some thoughts I had during puberty. During this time when I was probably around 13 or 14, I was very horny all of the time. I would get turned on by almost any female. What is giving me guilt is that there were a few occasions that even my mom turned me on a couple times! I felt guilty about it at the time, but it wasn’t that bad. I would masterbate to stop feeling so horny all of the time. I got over it though and haven’t been like that since then.

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}
Back in 6th grade, my best friend and I (both guys) would mess around and play truth or dare. We would always end up doing sexual things to each other. We didn’t tell anyone except one more guy who we played the game with once. In 8th grade I stopped playing, because I wanted to force myself to be attracted to girls. I am now in 12th grade, and I still do not get sexually aroused by girls. However, more bothering than that, I do get aroused by younger boys. I don’t know if it is because of my middle school experiences or what, but I don’t know how to change. I started hanging around a freshman boy at the start of the year, and we have done a few sexual things. I don’t think he is gay, but then again nobody would think I kinda am either. I have lots of friends, play sports and have had girlfriends like any other high school guy. I hang out with the “popular” people in my grade, and my future looks pretty good if it wasn’t for this gay/pedo problem. I look at other people classified as pedophiles, and I do not fit the category at all, except I have the same feelings towards boys. I will never kidnap or rape a kid, that’s for sure. But I want this weird arousal to go away, and I need to be attracted to girls. Any help would be very appreciated! This has been a very big problem for me and if you could please just give even a little advice it would mean a lot! (age 17, from US)

Cognitive distortion: Should statements
Distorted part: {'text': ['But I want this weird arousal to go away, and I need to be attracted to girls. '], 'answer_start': [1147]}
When I was in the seventh grade I always joked about depression. I never knew how serious it could be. My mother abandoned our family when I was little and got into drugs. My dad has been a single parent almost all his life. In 8th grade I started to realize that it was not a joke, because I had it. I stayed in my room, I drew away from my family and sports, and then one day I cut myself. It was the only feeling I had experienced in quite a while. And then when that became a habit, I stopped eating. I know this is serious and it should stop but I have no idea of how I should tell my mom, who has come back and I thought she deserved another chance. I just recently moved in with her about 4 months and all it’s done is made everything so much worse. I want to go to the doctor and let him help me. (age 15, from US)

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}
When my boyfriend and I started dating, things were wonderful. He accepted me for “me”, was non-judgmental, etc. One day he asked about my past. He had been married for most of his adult life, whereas I have never been married. I proceeded to tell him that I went to clubs from time to time when I was younger. He asked about my sexual past. I was honest and answered truthfully. He then began pulling away…saying I purposefully kept this from him. We broke up and got back together 3 times. Anytime he asks about it, I answer truthfully again. I have nothing to hide. Each time we have gotten back together, it has been better, but not anywhere near where it should be. He still believes I purposefully withheld this information, when in reality, I had never dated anyone that really cared about my past, so I didn’t think to share it. This situation has been a wall between us since we got together. I have done everything I know to do to reassure him and to help reestablish trust. This morning he tells me I haven’t done anything to make him believe in me. I feel like I have been busting my hump (so to speak), but at this point I don’t know what to do. Please help…how can I prove that I was telling the truth those months ago so we can be the couple we are more than capable of being?

Cognitive distortion: Personalization
Distorted part: {'text': ['This morning he tells me I haven’t done anything to make him believe in me.'], 'answer_start': [985]}
I am suspicious that my boyfriend my have molested his younger sister when they were kids. She recently made a comment to him in front of me stating “yeah, if someone saw what you were doing to me when we were younger, you’d probably kill them” (We were on the topic of being driven to murder). Now, alone that doesn’t seem too bad, but he has made prior comments he thinks are funny such as “get there before the hair” and “well if you tell them you’re 16 and they believe you, then why not?”

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}
My husband’s uncle has great financial means however spends extremely little money on entertainment. He showed up unannounced for years often at supper hour and whenever he liked. After his girlfriend broke up with him his intrusions worsened. We repeatedly asked him to call before he came, but he would show up anyway and say “If you are busy I just go.” If we say we are busy he argues. Visits are often and prolonged. Finally, after waking us up one morning I firmly told him that he was asked to call and repeatedly violates our request. His first response was “You don’t like me.” I am also sick with Lupus and when this first big argument came I was caring for several children. He didn’t come unannounced nor even when invited for about 6 months and then out of the blue he started again. Then came the argument followed by absence then another 6 months all would start again. This cycle has been going on for about 5 years now. My husband and I explained why we needed him to call and he nodded his head as though he understood. After these talks I made sure to invite him over so that he would know he would be able to visit. His response is usually the same. “I may come, not sure what I am doing yet.” That ends up tying up our night as we don’t know if he is coming or not. If we invite others to play cards we may not be able to if he just shows up. Hubby feels guilty telling him that we are not up for company. It is badly straining our marriage as I can’t even rely on having a peaceful night. Hubby is stressed because he doesn’t want him doing it either but would put up with it if I didn’t complain. He also is extremely rude to us and other guests. He says and does mean things when he perceives an injustice towards him. Everything mean thing he does (which is often) seems to be calculated to send a message. The last 7 out of 8 invites we gave he caused issues. A pharmacist friend of mine told me to read “Controlling People” and I was shocked at how much scenarios in the book resembled this relative. How can I help my husband not feel guilty about insisting his uncle respect boundaries? My husband tries, then his uncles manipulates him and my husband yells at me as to why he can’t come over when he wants. (From Canada)

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}
I used to get many strange looks for the things I did, like smash a bird on the beach with a rock when I was younger, blow fish up with fireworks, laugh when a rock was thrown at a bird and broke its wing, and I also used to abuse pets a lot as well. I used to beat the dog, I would choke my pet hamster until his eyes started bugging out, stuff like that.

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}
Hi, I have suffered a lot of failures back to back in a short space of time (3 years). I now feel hopeless. I am lost and my life is drifting. I would like to know what practical steps I can take to re-engage with the world and to form dreams/goals again and to start trying to achieve them.

Cognitive distortion: Mental filter
Distorted part: {'text': ['Hi, I have suffered a lot of failures back to back in a short space of time (3 years). '], 'answer_start': [0]}
My brother and his wife dated, traveled the world, and lived together for 8 years before marriage while doing their studies, all unknown to my parents. At the same time they got married, I got into my first relationship, which remains to this day, a long distance one, with us occasionally meeting once in a few months under parental supervision. It has been the most difficult 3 years, I cannot even begin to explain the frustration in words. We don’t have the luxury of sneaking off on trips because neither of us has the financial ability to or emotional support from our parents to do so.

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}
I have been with my husband for 7 years. We work great together, sometimes it feels like I married my best friend. However, after having a long distance relationship for about one year I find that my feelings for him are starting to fade. I am afraid that I am falling out of love. I still enjoy talking to him over Skype, but I don’t really miss him. However, he seems to miss me a lot and can’t wait to be together again.

Cognitive distortion: No Distortion
Distorted part: {'text': [''], 'answer_start': [-1]}
We’ve been together 7 years married 6. My husband is 31. I am 24. We separated almost a year due to untreated mental issues and infidelity. He was diagnosed bipolar and medicated now. Finally living together again I was excited to spice things up as that was his excuse for cheating. Now he claims his meds and our kids distract him from wanting sex. We’ve had sex maybe 8 times in 3 months and never intimate, quick, no kissing or eye contact. I found on his phone search history for all kinds of sexy teen, hot teen babe, most beautiful teens 2014, panty hose fetish teen miniskirt, etc. This crushed me. He claims to have no sex drive but goes and looks at that crap. I am not unattractive. 5’11 135 lbs, DD boobs — but his choices have made me feel worthless. He says he’s been battling these demons his whole life and it had nothing to do with me, but how am I supposed to feel when I am right here willing to fulfill his fantasies and he doesn’t even express a desire to be with me? Can you please help me make sense of this? I don’t have much heart left to break. The infidelity nearly killed me.  Please help. (age 24, from US)

Cognitive distortion: Labeling
Distorted part: {'text': ['5’11 135 lbs, DD boobs — but his choices have made me feel worthless.'], 'answer_start': [694]}
I’m an emotional wreck. Nothing triggers it. I just get emotional out of nowhere. I will cry for hours for no reason. I keep hearing voices in my head saying there’s something watching me and then i would freak out and start shaking and sobbing even more. I sometimes have to cover my ears in attempt to quiet down the voices. I also have an unhealthy habit of food binging. I can’t help it and i feel horrible after it. I will have something like a manic episode where i feel like i can do anything! I will suddenly get emotionally unstable again and get suicidal out of nowhere. I’m so paranoid and feel like people are always watching me. I feel like people are in my head reading my innermost thoughts. It drives me crazy. I know that it’s not possible but tell that to the crazy voices in my head. I hear people calling me when there’s no one around. I see shadowy figures lurking around my house. I display such inappropriate emotions all the time. If someone told me their dog just passed away then i would probably burst out laughing. Yeah this is why i can never attend a funeral. My mother thinks im ridiculously paranoid and delusional but i’m not. People don’t understand. I feel like im going mad. I sometimes can’t even show any emotions because i simply can’t feel. That hurts people. Im ridiculously empathetic but also ridiculously insensitive. Im always crying for no reason. I will burst out laughing for no reason. People tell me that im a psychopath or that im insane but I’m not. I could be rational sometimes. Which is why im here. Im actually a really intelligent person academically. I just don’t understand all of this madness. I feel like im going to accidentally drive myself into suicide because of this. I already self harm for relief. I have not been diagnosed with anything because i never got tested or went to a psychologist. I also really feel like im losing my grip on reality and my sanity is slipping. Could this be indicative of something bigger? (age 14, from US)

Cognitive distortion: Emotional Reasoning
Distorted part: {'text': ['People don’t understand. I feel like im going mad. I sometimes can’t even show any emotions because i simply can’t feel. That hurts people. Im ridiculously empathetic but also ridiculously insensitive. Im always crying for no reason. I will burst out laughing for no reason. '], 'answer_start': [1160]}
I’ve been dealing with this problem on and off for some years now and I’m finally in that “it’s hopeless” stage. I feel like I keep slipping in and out of crazy, I don’t even have panic attacks anymore but I always have this overwhelming since of anxiety and derealization. It makes me very uncomfortable, it messes with my thoughts and it makes it very hard to sleep. Every time I try to go to sleep I feel like I wake up half sleep and with anxiety causing me to think about strange things and kinda see lights. I’d have to try to sleep multiple times before I can get it. It makes me feel very depressed and emotionless, like I’m a zombie. And at times my derealization gets so bad I feel like I’m going crazy. I just don’t know what to do anymore. Im not even sure if this is still anxiety or is it become another problem.

Cognitive distortion: Mental filter
Distorted part: {'text': ['And at times my derealization gets so bad I feel like I’m going crazy.'], 'answer_start': [643]}