Anonymous-EmpathyAI/300-samples-cof-ref huggingface dataset:
Situation: I was given a solo for the church play.  At practice when it came time for me to sing, my voice cracked and I lost the solo.
Thought: I can't sing.

Reframe: I have been singing a lot and was not taking enough time to rest and prepare, and as a result, I faced some consequences. In the future, I will try to take better care of my voice so I can do the things I love!
Thinking traps addressed: all-or-nothing thinking,negative feeling or emotion,fortune telling,overgeneralizing,labeling

Reframe: I made a mistake at a crucial moment and faced some consequences. I know I'm a good singer, otherwise I wouldn't have gotten the solo at all. I will keep practicing and see if I can get some feedback from the director about how to improve for the next play.
Thinking traps addressed: all-or-nothing thinking,negative feeling or emotion,fortune telling,overgeneralizing,labeling
Situation: I was given a wrong dosage of medication by my Doctor.  I couldn't figure out why I felt so bad until I went back to see him.
Thought: Medication can be dangerous.

Reframe: Medications have side effects and that is why doctor has follow up appointments so I can have them adjusted to meet my needs
Thinking traps addressed: all-or-nothing thinking

Reframe: It is okay to be scared of side effects and medications are helpful to me
Thinking traps addressed: emotional reasoning,all-or-nothing thinking
Situation: I was greatly irritated, almost angry,  when a close friend reached out to me for assistance on taxes.  I usually do them, but I did not want to be bothered this year and felt almost used.
Thought: I feel my friend used me.

Reframe: My friend may not know how busy I am and did not mean to make me feel used. I should just tell my friend that I cannot help with their taxes this year.
Thinking traps addressed: mind reading

Reframe: Maybe my friend has been going through something or is busy and that is why they haven't reached out. I cant expect them to reach out to me if I am not doing the same.
Thinking traps addressed: personalizing
Situation: I was in my grandma's house and I knocked the vase on the floor
Thought: Grandma will be so angry at me

Reframe: I am just making predictions. I have no way of telling what will happen or how my grandma will react. It is just a vase and she may not be bothered
Thinking traps addressed: fortune telling

Reframe: My grandma loves me and she will never be angry with me.
Thinking traps addressed: fortune telling
Situation: I was looking forward to relaxing but my partner asked me to make dinner instead.
Thought: My partner thinks I am lazy.

Reframe: My partner asked me to make dinner, that does not mean I am lazy.
Thinking traps addressed: mind reading

Reframe: I know my partner doesn't think I am lazy, there is probably another reason they asked me to do this.
Thinking traps addressed: mind reading,personalizing
Situation: I was not paying attention and scratched someone's car while driving
Thought: I am will have to pay for this

Reframe: I might have overestimated my turn and must've accidentally scratched their car.
Thinking traps addressed: catastrophizing

Reframe: I might have to pay some of the damages, but I have car insurance and the car insurance will help pay for some of the damages.
Thinking traps addressed: fortune telling
Situation: I was on a coffee break and my boss reminded me of work that needs to get done.
Thought: I could get fired.

Reframe: My boss might be feeling anxious about this work. I can help out my boss and our organization by taking on this task.
Thinking traps addressed: all-or-nothing thinking

Reframe: I'm feeling anxious after my boss mentioned the work I needed to get done. I will work to calm myself and then apply myself to this work so that I can be confident in what I contribute to this job.
Thinking traps addressed: catastrophizing,all-or-nothing thinking

Reframe: I wonder what my boss thinks of me. I want to do my best at this job so they are satisfied.
Thinking traps addressed: mind reading

Reframe: Having my boss mention that work made me feel anxious and guilty. Those feeling may not necessarily be warranted and I will do my best at this job and to make them proud of my work.
Thinking traps addressed: mind reading,personalizing
Situation: I was on a date and started to cough badly as the food was too hot
Thought: I should have ordered a milder dish

Reframe: Coughing happens, I ordered the food I wanted and it tasts really nice
Thinking traps addressed: should statements

Reframe: I could have ordered something milder, but that might have resulted in a cough as well
Thinking traps addressed: should statements
Situation: I was on the phone with my boyfriend and he got a call on the other line. I assumed it was another girl calling him.
Thought: I am not good enough.

Reframe: I am worthy of connection and conversation.
Thinking traps addressed: labeling

Reframe: The person on the phone is probably just a friend or someone from his family.
Thinking traps addressed: none
Situation: I was passed over for a new job with a larger company.
Thought: I had the qualifications and the experience for this job, yet I was passed over for someone else who had less experience than I.

Reframe: I am proud of myself for getting an interview in the first place. Maybe the other person has better interview skills or had experience that aligns more closely with the role. I should see if I can get feedback from the company so I can try to improve for next time.
Thinking traps addressed: personalizing

Reframe: The other person may have been more qualified than me, even if they have less experience. Maybe I can improve my interview skills for next time.
Thinking traps addressed: personalizing
Situation: I was passed over for a small promotion at my place of work. The person who got the promotion was younger and less experienced than me, but a favorite of the boss.
Thought: I was angry because I was the better person for the job.

Reframe: My emotional reactions to not getting something I want are valid and I can decide how to respond next from a rational place
Thinking traps addressed: personalizing

Reframe: There may be many factors at play in a hiring situation that I am not privy to
Thinking traps addressed: should statements
Situation: I was planning a bachelor party for a friend and some of the people invited were not satisfied with what I was trying to plan.
Thought: Why can't they cooperate on this?

Reframe: It sounds like there is no way to create a perfect plan for this party, I will continue to try my best to be a good leader.
Thinking traps addressed: personalizing,all-or-nothing thinking,negative feeling or emotion,overgeneralizing,blaming

Reframe: My plan is not meeting the needs of everyone involved, I should try collaborating with others or get their input on what plan would be best for everyone.
Thinking traps addressed: personalizing,all-or-nothing thinking,negative feeling or emotion,overgeneralizing,blaming
Situation: I was reprimanded at work for standing up to a coworker who was bullying another co-worker.
Thought: It was unfair that I was the one to get in trouble for defending a weaker person.

Reframe: The situation that occurred is complex with a lot of people involved - it's not just a matter of who is in the right and who is in the wrong.
Thinking traps addressed: all-or-nothing thinking

Reframe: I can own some responsibility for this conflict that occurred at work.
Thinking traps addressed: blaming
Situation: I was talking to a friend who got me angry.
Thought: He's insulting me.

Reframe: I should have a conversation with my friend to clarify what is going on if I am having such a strong reaction to what they said. If this is the first time this has happened, I will assume that they were not intentionally insulting me.
Thinking traps addressed: mind reading,labeling,negative feeling or emotion,all-or-nothing thinking,personalizing

Reframe: Sometimes people will say things that make me angry and that's okay. If this is a friend I can trust, we should be able to work this out together with a conversation. If not, this may be a sign to distance myself from this friend.
Thinking traps addressed: mind reading,labeling,negative feeling or emotion,all-or-nothing thinking,personalizing
Situation: I was talking to my husband about something that happened to me that day.  He kept interrupting and talking over me.  I got up and left the room.
Thought: My husband was being a jerk and not listening to me.

Reframe: I didn't appreciate my husband's behavior. I should talk with him so he knows how I feel when he interrupts or talks over me.
Thinking traps addressed: personalizing

Reframe: While it was not kind of my husband to interrupt me, he may have had something else on his mind and not have been aware that he was interrupting.
Thinking traps addressed: personalizing
Situation: I was talking with my boyfriend on my lunch break and he started to clean his computer with canned air which made a very loud noise.
Thought: Does he not care what I am saying?

Reframe: I can't assume why he started to clean his computer, but I can tell him that it's loud and ask him to do it later.
Thinking traps addressed: overgeneralizing,personalizing,blaming

Reframe: It's okay that I feel annoyed that he's not paying attention in our conversation. I can ask him if he can clean his computer after we have lunch together.
Thinking traps addressed: personalizing,blaming
Situation: I was told that I don't look as attractive as I used to by my significant other. She told me that she does not like the way that I have been dressing lately and that I should go back to my old style of dressing. I can recall feeling embarrassed and let down with myself. I felt very tiny and as though my relationship was falling apart because she was starting to become very superficial.
Thought: What am I doing to deserve this?

Reframe: I can decide to take or leave their feedback because how I dress is my own expression and may not be for her all the time
Thinking traps addressed: emotional reasoning

Reframe: My SO's  opinions of me do not define me
Thinking traps addressed: emotional reasoning,labeling
Situation: I was unable to visit my Mother in the hospital in another state.
Thought: I am the worst daughter in the world.

Reframe: flights are so expensive, so i could not afford to visit my mother. i am still a good daughter
Thinking traps addressed: labeling,all-or-nothing thinking,negative feeling or emotion

Reframe: i will give my mother a call. i'll try to figure out a way to be connected with her
Thinking traps addressed: labeling,all-or-nothing thinking,negative feeling or emotion
Situation: I was up for a promotion at work and did not receive it.
Thought: I will be stuck in middle-management for the remainder of my career.

Reframe: I did not receive this promotion, but I do good work and hopefully, I will be promoted in the future.
Thinking traps addressed: catastrophizing,overgeneralizing,negative feeling or emotion

Reframe: I did not receive this promotion, but this doesn't mean I won't receive one in the future.
Thinking traps addressed: fortune telling,catastrophizing,overgeneralizing
Situation: I was walking in a poorly lit downtown area when a man approached me and asked for money. I told him I had none, and he started cussing me out and following me. I eventually started running and he finally stopped following.
Thought: He is going to hurt me

Reframe: The man may not have hurt me. I probably am thinking of the worst case scenario. It is good to try to get out of that situation just in case something happens, but I am probably making myself more scared by catastrophizing the situation to be worse than it actually may be.
Thinking traps addressed: catastrophizing

Reframe: I have no indication that the man is going to hurt me. Maybe he has some other mental health issues or is going to the same direction to ask other people for money. I don't know if he is going to hurt me, and I should focus on dealing with the situation as it comes.
Thinking traps addressed: fortune telling
Situation: I was with friends and misinterpreted a comment and was upset for the wrong reasons. Turns out I misheard what was said and made a big deal out of nothing.
Thought: Why are my friends treating me so harshly?

Reframe: It may feel a little harsh with how they are responding, but I was the one that made the mistake. I need to apologize and communicate to them my wish to make things better if I can.
Thinking traps addressed: negative feeling or emotion,blaming

Reframe: My friends are just frustrated with me for what I said. I should just take a step back to calm down, and then I can reach back out and apologize.
Thinking traps addressed: personalizing,negative feeling or emotion
Situation: I wave to an acquaintance and get no response.
Thought: I don't make a memorable impression on people.

Reframe: I feel hurt that this person didn't notice me but I know there are plenty of people I feel connected to.
Thinking traps addressed: labeling

Reframe: There are many reasons they might not have waved back. I'm feeling anxious about it, but this was a very small interaction.
Thinking traps addressed: mind reading
Situation: I went on a trip and heard a commercial for a kitchen appliance
Thought: I feel so anxious maybe I left something turned on in the kitchen

Reframe: I'm assuming that just because I feel the fear it must mean that something scary is happening. My feelings are real, but this doesn't mean the threat is real
Thinking traps addressed: should statements

Reframe: I'm being overly concerned. Everything is going to be alright
Thinking traps addressed: should statements
Situation: I worried about being late and I almost crashed the car
Thought: I worry too much

Reframe: Even though I am running late, I can still focus while driving Better getting there safely than not at all
Thinking traps addressed: negative feeling or emotion

Reframe: My anxiety and worry issues are a problem I am having problems with staying focused while driving
Thinking traps addressed: negative feeling or emotion
Situation: I yelled at my child for being too fidgety during stories at bedtime.
Thought: The kids will never settle down.

Reframe: I overreacted by yelling. Kids will be kids and they will settle down eventually.
Thinking traps addressed: fortune telling

Reframe: It is normal for kids to be fidgety at bedtime. There will be nights where they settle down easily and nights where they don't settle down easily like tonight.
Thinking traps addressed: fortune telling,overgeneralizing
Situation: I yelled at my sister for not doing something correctly
Thought: There will never be enough time to get everything done

Reframe: I am feeling stressed right now, but when things settle down I should be able to manage what I need to do better.
Thinking traps addressed: all-or-nothing thinking,catastrophizing,blaming

Reframe: It is not my sister's job to get everything done. I need to take ownership of things I want to accomplish too.
Thinking traps addressed: blaming
Situation: I'm afraid of pregnancy and I think i'm not mentally or emotionally prepared
Thought: I can't be a mother

Reframe: I am afraid to become pregnant but I can do things to prepare myself both emotionally and mentally.  I can be a mother in the future if I choose.
Thinking traps addressed: emotional reasoning

Reframe: No one really knows what the future holds and most mothers feel anxious about their ability to be a good mother.  I won't really know unless I try.  I will work on resolving my fear and anxiety.
Thinking traps addressed: fortune telling
Situation: I'm facing an issue, that I love you girlfriend and she loves me back. But I hurt her because I'm manipulative, without really realizing what I'm doing. I make her feel guilty of things that she shouldn't feel so, and if I don't get things my way, I manipulate it so it sounds like it's her fault or she is wrong. I don't do it voluntarily, but I do it too often and it hurts her and me.
Thought: I am manipulative

Reframe: I don't mean to hurt my girlfriend when I act manipulative, but I need to work on this or she will leave me.
Thinking traps addressed: labeling

Reframe: I love my girlfriend and she loves me. I need to work on my communication skills with her so she can see that I'm making an effort to not be manipulative.
Thinking traps addressed: labeling,negative feeling or emotion
Situation: I'm failing school
Thought: I'm worthless

Reframe: Plan B comes in now so I won’t fail: spend extra time on my school work, or get a tutor, or brainstorm other options Retaking a class I fail is not the end of the world I am not giving up on me !!!
Thinking traps addressed: comparing and despairing

Reframe: Maybe some tutoring sessions can help me raise my grades
Thinking traps addressed: none
Situation: I'm feeling suicidal
Thought: I can't stop cutting myself

Reframe: I'm experiencing an unpleasant emotion and that's normal. I can also seek professional help to get me through this
Thinking traps addressed: negative feeling or emotion

Reframe: It's natural to deal with strong negative emotions. I'm hoping to find less destructive ways of coping with these emotions in the future
Thinking traps addressed: negative feeling or emotion
Situation: I'm hanging out with a friend chit chatting, but realizing he's not putting much effort, like usual, into having good conversation.  He just repeats the same thing ad nauseam.
Thought: He's a nice guy, but I don't want to be friends with him any more as he's putting no effort into not being completely boring.

Reframe: He is a quieter person but I wonder if it takes him longer to open up.
Thinking traps addressed: labeling

Reframe: He is not very chatty conversationally at times but he is a nice person and that means something.
Thinking traps addressed: disqualifying the positive
Situation: I'm late for the meeting
Thought: I never do anything right

Reframe: Forget that! It is okay to be late to a meeting. Let's not blow this out of proportion.
Thinking traps addressed: overgeneralizing

Reframe: I do some things right and some wrong, just like everyone else. I fouled up on my meeting, but let's not blow this out of proportion
Thinking traps addressed: overgeneralizing

Reframe: Come on, now, I'm not "a jerk." I am generally punctual and enthusiastic about meetings
Thinking traps addressed: labeling

Reframe: I may have come across as "a jerk", but I'll try to be on time for the next meeting
Thinking traps addressed: labeling
Situation: I'm waiting everyday for the weekend and the holidays. I'm not getting anything productive done.
Thought: I can't bring myself to be motivated.

Reframe: I'm still getting some work done, even if it's not as much as I want. I'm clearly finding some motivation even though it may not feel like it.
Thinking traps addressed: all-or-nothing thinking

Reframe: If I'm waiting everyday for the weekend and the holidays, that may not be my fault. My job may be unsatisfying/unfulfilling.
Thinking traps addressed: negative feeling or emotion
Situation: I've been a massive bummer in my personal life and am making people feel bad
Thought: I'm worthless

Reframe: I am not worthless.
Thinking traps addressed: labeling,all-or-nothing thinking

Reframe: I may have shortcomings in my personal life but my professional life is thriving and I am well thought of at work.  Therefore, I am not completely worthless.
Thinking traps addressed: labeling,magnification
Situation: I've been applying for jobs and just got a call that someone else filled a position I applied for.
Thought: I might never get hired.

Reframe: I feel anxious about finding a new job but know that eventually things will work out.
Thinking traps addressed: catastrophizing

Reframe: I'm frustrated that I got rejected but will stay committed to finding the right job for me.
Thinking traps addressed: overgeneralizing
Situation: I've been sitting at my desk for a long time and I haven't been able to get anything done.
Thought: I will lose my job eventually.

Reframe: It will be hard to keep this job if I'm not able to be more productive. I am struggling now but I can and will find a way to do better.
Thinking traps addressed: catastrophizing

Reframe: This is hard and I'm feeling anxious about my performance. I will try my best, be kind to myself, and find ways to improve.
Thinking traps addressed: fortune telling

Reframe: I'm doing my best. I'm struggling right now but I know I can do this.
Thinking traps addressed: comparing and despairing

Reframe: I'm having difficulty concentrating and being productive. This makes me feel anxious but I will do my best to ground myself, get things done, and work to be proud of what I accomplish.
Thinking traps addressed: comparing and despairing
Situation: I've mentioned being sad and no one seems to think its anything serious
Thought: No one cares about me

Reframe: Nobody takes me serious when I share my sad feelings
Thinking traps addressed: overgeneralizing,personalizing

Reframe: No one cares about my sadness
Thinking traps addressed: overgeneralizing,personalizing,blaming
Situation: In class I feel like others hear my thoughts and judge me. When some things really don't work(for example I have some things for school for tommorow and I can't find how to do that thing after searching hours on internet I get angry and sometimes results to self harm(punching). I sometimes feel like everybody is here just to watch me and see how I react to things(sounds insane).
Thought: Am I insane?

Reframe: It's ok to feel self-conscious and feel frustrated when I can't figure something, but I may need to get help for the self-harming because that doesn't seem healthy.
Thinking traps addressed: labeling

Reframe: These behaviors don't make me insane, but they're still concerning and I should probably reach out for help
Thinking traps addressed: labeling
Situation: It's so hard to study effectively and it takes all the time and energy I have. And then I still don't feel prepared.
Thought: I'm so behind and i'm so afraid of the terrible grades I will recieve. I can't do anything right

Reframe: I need to start studying in smaller bites weeks before the exam over and over Practice makes perfect
Thinking traps addressed: negative feeling or emotion

Reframe: If I prepare myself ahead of time for the test I won’t feel like such a failure and will get a good grade
Thinking traps addressed: none
Situation: I’m a drug addict
Thought: I feel like I will never be loved in a romantic way because I am not very pretty

Reframe: I feel a lot of shame and anxiety about having an addiction, but that doesn't mean I'm going to go crazy. I know I can get the help I need.
Thinking traps addressed: emotional reasoning

Reframe: Addiction is challening to overcome, but many people successfully recover. I can focus on what I can control, like getting the help I need.
Thinking traps addressed: fortune telling
Situation: Last week I found out that my mother had experienced sudden back pain that lasted for a few days  and I somehow worked myself into a very concerned state where I kind of felt like she was going to become completely incapacitated and have to live in a nursing home.
Thought: I'm afraid she's going to die soon.

Reframe: My mother may have experienced sudden back pain because she was gardening for several hours the day before. The back pain is likely a result of the time spent leaning forward and is nothing to worry about.
Thinking traps addressed: catastrophizing

Reframe: I have worked myself into a very concerned state over my mother's back pain. I should try calling my mom to check in and ask how her pain is doing. Maybe she will tell me she is feeling slightly better and my worries can be at ease.
Thinking traps addressed: emotional reasoning