after a long BBQ where there were many friends gathered and conversations formed, flowed and moved on, that we should spend a little time together next time and really 'talk' together. Well the next time came a few months later and she reminded me by email that it would be a good opportunity. This woman is attractive. She rarely wears cosmetics and lets her natural 'face' shine through with its character and natural pleasantness. I was astonished when she turned up 'made-up'. It was almost a different woman. I was pleasant in response but the objective of knowing her more and sharing some friendship time uninterrupted was lost in this display. She had clearly thought that I had 'designs' on her and clearly she was up for the game. But I had had no intention of being anything other than a friend and simply wanted to spend some time knowing her better and being myself. Can men and woman be friends? Of course. But this idea that only men see attractiveness as leading to sex -- and blaming them for it, or at least criticising it- is just low-level misandry. Where a man might respond to a woman's physical attractiveness, women seem not to care as much about his. She seems far more interested in his 'place' in life, his earning capacity, his clothes and possessions. How 'other' people see him. He likes her; she likes what he has. He responds to who she is; she responds to what he