sex, but looking back I think it really did.  I think that if a long term partner says it isn't important, maybe they are just saying that they don't have those feelings anymore -- those romantic, sexual feelings and desires. But now that I am in a new relationship with those feelings -- it seems very important. The intimacy brings us even closer. I can't believe I went all those years without being interested... forgot what it felt like to actually WANT to have sex rather than because I felt an obligation. I always had excuses too -- too tired, too stressed, didn't feel I was sexy, etc.  Which all felt like valid reasons to me at the time. But I could be exhausted and I think I would still have sex with T -the desire is just there now. Not sure if this helps or not... Dear Renee, not sure if you have read my previous posts but I am totally with you on the sex issue. Until I got together with P I really did not know sex could and should be fun, always saw it as just something to do and as quickly as possible really. Trouble is, once this knowledge is gained, how to deal with it. I have no such desire towards my husband in this way, but with P, I feel and know I could, at any time and anywhere. He is I suppose like a drug, only trouble is, one which for me