really society driven (think this was mentioned earlier in the thread! ) but when you are older and have children, to flit is not straight forward. oh well, to bed soon. think I will go it alone to relate tomorrow as husband still does not want to go anymore. paid for it though so many help me to talk. Hope Emily you are ok. AKS - do you really want to let go? i think i fool myself that same line - how you doing now? any contact? DS - oh the maybes and sometime in years to come... believe me, if is is not happening now, move away.. only wish I could fully myself - we always live in hope - wish I could offer you more... take care and write soon. Suzzy Hi Suzzy, Please do  not feel that you have let me down!  There is no right or wrong way.  And of all people nobody swings like me from one minute to this the next to that -my gay best friend [GBF] says I am schitsophrenic in the way I go from one to the other.  This is how affairs are -this is how love is! My MM said tonight how tired he is too, and distracted.  We agreed that we need to talk about things -when we get a chance to be together next.  We are in the most heady of phases -where we long to be together, but cannot.  My GBF asked what I would