feelings for him in that way are gone.  But of course, I always second guess myself and wonder if T is kind of taking up all those feelings so I don't have any left to give to my husband. T and I have tried the no-contact thing on many occasions -- never lasting a significant amount of time. Well, we went a month without seeing each other or talking, though there was still some texting/chatting.  It is torture being away from the one you love. I can understand what you are feeling and it must be so hard... It is also very hard to make the decision to split from your husband. I know I thought about that many times before T was around, but never had the guts. I wish I would have now... Cause now my husband blames it all on the affair...which really is not the case.But that is the story he will tell everyone. I will have to live with that. I hope you find happiness -- even if it is not with P. Renee Dear Renee, Life sucks. Why are there so many of us in the same boat. I too suggested a separation, only last week but my husband wants to try only I dont believe I do, only possibly for the kids. The half truth about my affair has not moved him neither. I think my 'affair' could be counted as one of those which I hoped would be a 'get out' ,