state, focused to a large extent on the rearing of children, call for a high level of stability. There is no point in taking on the socially supported family roles of fatherhood, motherhood, breadwinner, housekeeper, disciplinarian, and protector of childhood contentment and happiness unless the partners intend to maintain these functions as long as they are needed. The pressures which come from the adaptive nature of marriage are all in favor of finding identity through these roles, and success in this way is taken to be the essence of what it is to be normal. This kind of rigidity is at war with the growth goals of psychological mating, in which there is no guarantee that partners can grow at the same rate. Once growth goals become real, individuals may need to go through a series of relationships in order to find themselves. The whole atmosphere of psychological growth is one of flux and change, and the adaptive requirements of marriage are built on maintaining the status quo. Unless the individual is free to select a changing psychological world, openness to growth can only lead to psychic exhaustion. On the other hand without commitments to marital vows, the institution of marriage is undermined. Social enforcement of images of normalcy in sexual behavior and in the acceptance of family roles is the leading edge of society's effort to buttress up its acceptance of ignorance and immorality as inevitable aspects of the human condition. There is no ultimate reason why the full