colors show. He even takes a wide sweep to garner support from her friends and relatives. She may fear at this time for her safety and put in place some things to protect her and her children to keep them safe as he ramps up his anger. But she has determined that it is over and she pursues the divorce in order to get free from the mind games and the abusive control that's been going on. This process -- from pursuing divorce until it is finished -- is usually about a two year process. In conclusion, when the big D really happens, here is some candid advice. Be careful to not jump from the frying pan into the fire. People often jump into another relationship too quickly. Deep in the new relationship it may still be masking abuse with a different storefront. For example, they may jump from their X that is very rigid, all or nothing thinking -- that is black and white and domineering -- to someone that is real easy going, suave, or maybe even passive. They do not realize that this storefront may mask them being non committal, hard to move, or being unable to make or keep a decision. The reverse of this also may be the case. It's really about jumping from a frying pan into a fire. How do you prevent that? The best chance is that you fix what is broken inside of you. What is the problem? Why do you