spend 3 hours trying to explain to them that we needed shots of the boats from behind and they kept saying, "Why don't you just rotate the boat?" I was contacted to do a branding project for a client who sold fruit juice locally. He came to my office and presented me with a storyboard of how the introduction animation for his website should run: The first few slides show a banana, pineapple, peach and strawberry happily dancing and cheering as they walk around in circles. About three or four slides in, they all jump into a working blender and their juices splatter all over the screen. The last slide is just their logo slowly fading in. He was dead serious. Not long ago, at a gas station in Truro, Nova Scotia (which is to say many degrees removed from the centre of the hip universe), I saw a poster featuring an image of a rat surfing a big wave. The whole thing was done in retro tones and styles, and there was a little tagline/logo in the top corner in '70s travel poster font and colours reading "Tropical Cheddar." It was an ad for a tropical cheddar slush, which does not taste like cheese, I'm told, but is the colour of cheap fast-food "cheddar" and probably tastes at least vaguely like tropical fruit. Asked my adland pal about it, he said, simply: "You are not the target." I find this to be an entirely legitimate complaint. And it reminds