she is now pregnant and in no way will leave.  I say that but still can't believe it. As for what I will do to repair my life with my wife, I have no idea.  I am trying to make up for it and yet desperately miss my AP. I would do anything to go back and do this over again.  Anything. To the above writer, I am surprised to see it can have as strong impact to a man as well. I am sorry you are going through this pain. -- you are not alone, and if your wife is having your baby, try to think about you soon will be a proud dad. At least that is something to look forward to. Honestly, I am crashed too, although I was trying so hard to think everything positively. The pain is still so fresh, I can not stop thinking about him. And everywhere I go, I can not help trying to find someone who looks like him, but I could not find anyone as prefect as he looks. And I can not stop thinking about that he is enjoying great time with his new girl friend, that thought alone is killing me. I do not know how long it will take me to get over this. -- I keep telling myself, I am doing better each day, in fact sometimes I am not sure. It is so painful!. I ask God for forgiveness and give me the power to