Is It Haram To Be Friends With The Opposite Gender?
What he means by that is type of relationship we make with our male friends where we’re very relaxed, crack jokes, travel together, do other activities together, tell each other our secrets, and are usually not mindful of our language and demeanor. This kind of friendship is obviously not allowed with a female person. But then it’s just a strict professional relationship and not friendship. I get it that sharing our secrets, not being mindful of our languages & doing many other activities together are something that are normally only done with close friends or best friends. But other things that were mentioned here like cracking jokes is done not only with ordinary friends, but with even acquaintances & colleagues. Without joking, it’s nothing but a strict professional relationship than a (because even teachers many times crack jokes in the classrooms in front of students, colleagues in offices also crack jokes who are not necessarily friends. Even Ghamidi Sahib tells jokes to his audiences sometimes & make them laugh. Only in a strict professional relationship like between a boss and a worker, there would be no cracking jokes). I think this needs more clarification what he meant by cracking jokes specifically, because people many times crack jokes with other people who are not even their friends. A meaningful friendship at school or work where we casually know each other and sometimes exchange lectures notes or help each other in homework assignments, etc. is not a problem. But that’s called acquaintanceship or colleagueship. Your classmates are basically acquaintances with whom you share notes, lectures and help each other in homeworks. With your friends you hang out (like you go to restaurants, coffee shops or parks), or you can visit their houses which is generally not done with acquaintances. I mean, even among friends, there are certain categories. Like ordinary friends, close friends, best friends. Below ordinary friends lies acquaintances & colleagues. I understand that a boy and a girl aren’t allowed to be close friends as it will involve meeting in seclusions, touching one another, sharing secrets, sleeping over etc. However, can they be ordinary friends? Like for example: Are they allowed to go to public places like restaurants or coffee shops together? Can they visit each other’s house as long as their family members are there & they don’t sit inside a room with doors locked? (Like for birthday, Eid or other festivals, not only for the purpose of studying or work) Can they travel together in groups? Not one boy & one girl, but in a friends group where a number of boys & girls are present? If the answers to these questions are “yes”, then that means they can be normal friends. If the answers to these are “no”, then they can only be acquaintances or colleagues, not friends (however the “cracking jokes” part still needs more clarification, as people often crack jokes with their coworkers & acquaintances who are not friends)
So this means one should avoid cracking jokes too much, but jokes that sometimes comes out within context is ok? & the 3 questions that I asked regarding friendships, are those allowed or prohibited? The questions were: Are they allowed to go to public places like restaurants or coffee shops together? Can they visit each other’s house as long as their family members are there & they don’t sit inside a room with doors locked? (Like for birthday, Eid or other festivals, not only for the purpose of studying or work) Can they travel together in groups? Not one boy & one girl, but in a friends group where a number of boys & girls are present?