Depression
I’m not a scholar, but I’ve been through similar states of confusion not at your age of 15, but around 21–22. One thing I learned is, don’t sacrifice truth for certainty. Not every fatwa must be accepted blindly. Approach them with reason and logic. Keep a student like mindset. Often it’s our inner fear that entangles us in such matters. The first step toward peace is to accept the world as it is. I believ as knowledge grows, you’ll find clarity too. Scholars here can guide you better.