Document 2476-A

Revised Document

Personnel Warning

The following document was created under the influence of a cognihazardous effect specializing in the alteration of perceived information. Information in this document is not to be discerned as truth. A revised document has been made available to personnel with clearance. It is advised to those assigned to this SCP item to read this document in order to acquire a better understanding of its cognihazardous components.

Knight #: SIR-2476 the Safe

SIR-2476. Dressed in its original robes and armour.

Special Chamber Requirements: SIR-2476 is kept in a humanoid containment tower at Site-17 castle. Questioning in interviews with SIR-2476 are to kept to a minimum, in order to prevent the activation of its primary enchantment. SIR-2476 is to be fed on a diet consisting of ham, canned pork and any type of jam as a condiment. SIR-2476 has been allowed to keep a potted shrubbery in its chamber of its own request.

Description: SIR-2476 is a human male in its early thirties, biologically identical to the late film actor Graham Arthur Chapman. SIR-2476 is prone to occasional episodes of hostility, where it will insult personnel in a French accent and insist they leave its presence, under the threat of further taunting. Apart from these episodes, SIR-2476 is generally cooperative with Foundation staff. The words "Mr. Monty Python And The Holy Grail, by Gamers Against Weed” are tattooed across SIR-2476’s left thigh.

SIR-2476 displays a number of enchantments relating to the 1975 film 'Monty Python and the Holy Grail' by the British comedy group, Monty Python. SIR-2476 is only capable of verbal communication through the use of words used in the manuscript of the film. SIR-2476 is able to recite the script of the film in its entirety, including dialogue, descriptions, actions and both beginning and ending credits. SIR-2476 is unable to speak any words outside of the script, despite multiple attempts.

When speaking for extended periods of time, SIR-2476 will begin dictating lines from the films script in-order, and proceed to recite the remainder in its entirety. SIR-2476 will begin reciting from a point in the script where the last word(s) it spoke was used. Anyone speaking with SIR-2476, or anyone else involved in the conversation at the time of the effects activation will join in with the recital. SIR-2476 and those affected will speak the dialogue of a varying set of characters through the entire recital. Subjects will take turns to speak the script's descriptions and actions. The beginning and ending credits will always be recited by SIR-2476. Those affected are unable to recall the events which took place while under SIR-2476’s effects.

Initial interview log

The following is a partial interview performed by Brother Belle shortly after the recovery of SIR-2476.

+Interview Log 2476-1

- Access Granted

Brother Belle: Alright. Sir 2476, do tell me, what are your earliest memories? And what did you do to those peasants in ███████?

SIR-2476: I remember walking around and knocking into someone. I said sorry. They were nice to me. We started to talk about funny things.

Brother Belle: What did you discuss?

SIR-2476: Monty Python. We both like it.

Brother Belle: How did you know about the film beforehand?

SIR-2476: I knew it when I appeared.

Brother Belle: Alright. How did you make them do what they did?

SIR-2476: It started after a little while. He brought up the spanking scene and I remembered it being fantastic. So we started saying it!

Brother Belle: That was the trigger?

SIR-2476: Yes, it was rather fun. Did I do something wrong?

Brother Belle: No, no. You have nothing to worry about.

SIR-2476: Oh ok, thank you. I was afraid I’d done something bad.

Brother Belle: Do you enjoy comedy films?

SIR-2476: Yes! I haven’t seen them but I know they are good! Could I watch some?

Brother Belle: We’ll see. If you can help us out some more. I'm sure it can be arranged.

SIR-2476: Thank you! I get to watch it properly! With all the dancing and singing. (SIR-2476 pauses for a few seconds)

SIR-2476: And cheery music would be required to make it seem homey. Luckily, that is just what we get. Knights. Singing.

Brother Belle: We’re Knights of the Round Table. We dance whene’er we’re able.

SIR-2476: Knights leap on table.

Brother Belle: We do routines and chorus scenes with footwork-

At this point, the interview was immediately terminated and SIR-2476 was returned to its holding chamber. Both SIR-2476 and Brother Belle continued to recite the script of Monty Python and the Holy Grail in its entirety, despite being held in separate locations. They got better.

Document 2476-8745

The following document was recovered from the village of ███████ upon locating SIR-2476. It is reproduced below in its entirety.

Jesus Christ! You've just found yourself your very own Sir Monty Python And The Holy Grail by the Holy order of Knights Against Weed! It's only a model. Who is King Wondertainment?

Gather them all and become Sir Gamer!

01. Sir Literal Serial Killer

02. Sir Normie

03. Sir Sanders

04. Sir Get Anything For Free In Any Shop

20. Sir Sex Number

21. Sir Heavenly Virtues

22. Sir Deadly Sins

23. Sir Original Character

24. Sir. D.A.R.E.

25. Lady Gentrification

26. Lady Mad About Video Games

27. Sir Meme

28. Sir Ominous (discontinued)

29. Sir Destiny

30. Sir Monty Python And The Holy Grail ✔

31. Lady Zapatista

32. Sir Hax

33. Sir Just Has The Tattoo

34. Sir Top Text and Sir Bottom Text

35. Sir Finale

36. Sir Not Appearing In This Series

Item #: SCP-2476

Object Class: Euclid

SCP-2476 in its original outfit, prior to containment.

Special Containment procedures: All information regarding SCP-2476 may only be made available to Level 3 personnel who are currently studying SCP-2476. Personnel studying SCP-2476 are to first be directly shown SCP-2476's anomalous properties directly in-order to prevent the spread of its SCP-2476-1.

SCP-2476 is kept in a humanoid containment cell at Site-17. SCP-2476 has no special medical or dietary requirements.

Description: SCP-2476 is a human male in its mid-twenties. SCP-2476 is prone to occasional episodes of extreme hostility, where it will demand personnel to conform to its desires, under the threat of extreme violence. Apart from these episodes, SCP-2476 is generally cooperative with Foundation staff. The words "Mr. Spanish Inquisition, by Gamers Against Weed” are tattooed across SCP-2476’s left thigh.

SCP-2476-1 is a cognitohazard affecting those who have not learned of SCP-2476's alias by reading its tattoo, or have not yet perceived its anomalous properties occur directly. Under these circumstances, information subjects learn will be falsified to fit the theme of the 1975 film Monty Python And The Holy Grail. Fabrications caused by SCP-2476-1 vary depending on the type of information learned and will persist with each subject. Subjects will continue to experience SCP-2476-1 as they learn more information regarding SCP-2476, and will only cease once they have perceived SCP-2476's actual anomalous properties in action.

SCP-2476 suffers from extreme delusions regarding instruments and objects capabilities to inflict harm on others, believing items of a safe and benign nature to instead be the most effective. All instruments utilized by SCP-2476 which under regular circumstances would be effective in inflicting physical harm and injuries to others will become completely ineffective. SCP-2476 will utilize whatever instrument it uses in a highly ineffective manner, preventing the target from receiving any physical pain whatsoever. Notable delusions include perceiving a bat to be a baguette and a pair of knives to be a pair of sofa cushions.

Recovery: SCP-2476 was originally detained on the 11th of January 2017, when Foundation web crawlers located the use of the phrases Gamers Against Weed and Mr. Monty Python And The Holy Grail on numerous social networking accounts mentioning an unknown individual in ██████, North Carolina, United States who had caused several public disturbances. SCP-2476 was located in a nearby bookstore when retrieved, dressed in an outfit resembling that of the Spanish Inquisition costumes used in the Monty Python sketches of the same name, attempting to attack a cashier ineffectively with a desk lamp, for selling ‘unorthodox’ reading material. Foundation agents were able to detain it without incident. Amnestics were dispatched to all witnesses effectively.

SCP-2476-1 became apparent after multiple Foundation personnel were informed of SCP-2476s recovery by agents. Temporary containment was prepared for SCP-2476 based upon falsified information given to Foundation personnel. Personnel were met with surprise upon SCP-2476's arrival due to its unexpected effects. All personnel involved were given amnestic treatment.

Interview Log

The following is a partial interview performed by Dr. Belle several days after the recovery of SCP-2476.

+ Interview Log 2476-1

- Access Granted

<Begin Log>

SCP-2476: Ello! We’re gonna start another interview?

Dr. Belle: Yes, if that’s alright with you.

SCP-2476: Good! Good! What did ya wanna talk about?

Dr. Belle: We were hoping to discuss the creation of your anomalous properties.

SCP-2476: Really? Well…. God. I honestly have no clue what to tell you (sniggers). I wouldn’t really know what was going on in those guys heads at the time when they made me. They probablies just poured a whole bag of cocaine on a table and just started shoving their heads into it like: (SCP-2476 raises its head into the air and widens its eyes) “Aaaaaagghhhhh’!

Dr. Belle: You seem quite energetic today.

SCP-2476: Haha! (in a higher pitch) I know!

SCP-2476: …Can I have my outfit back?

Dr. Belle: Sorry, but I told you before, that's not possible.

SCP-2476: Oh, poooh!

Dr. Belle: But in all seriousness, what do you believe was the point of your creation? All other Misters so far have been made with at least some meaningful idea in mind. Not to say you yourself are somehow less… We are just finding it difficult to understand why you were made like this.

SCP-2476: I don’t know really. I think it was less off “We’re gonna make something meaningful to make people think. Yeah, we’re edgy and deep!” and more like “Guys. We need to do this, it’ll be fucking incredible.”. Or maybe like a reverse thing? Like it’s a clever idea presented in a really stupid way?

Dr. Belle: That would make sense… Speaking of, how do you feel during your, well, episodes?

SCP-2476: It’s really weird! It’s not like I don’t remember doing it. It’s more like when you're really hyper, you know? When you’re in that zone of crazy? it’s like that but times one-hundred. I just go around acting all mental like ‘Ha ha!’

Dr. Belle: And how do you feel after the experience?

SCP-2476: try not to really think about it. But honestly, sometimes I look back on it and am like “Oh God… What the hell were you doing!? You fool!”. Those surveillance tapes you showed me were pretty funny though. The peoples' reactions alone were enough to cheer me up, so thanks for that.

Dr. Belle: Glad it helped. Another question, how were you able to know about Gamers Against Weed? When we asked about your earliest memories, you said you'd woken up in ██████.

SCP-2476: I remember some things from what I guess you'd call 'before'. They're not really clear memories, more like information I woke up with. I think whatever process they used to create me involved making me but only partly, and then editing aspects of me… to see how I behaved or… something… Um…

Dr. Belle: Do you have a problem remembering? We can continue this at a later date.

SCP-2476: Nah nah it's good. It’s just a bit difficult to talk about certain parts.

SCP-2476: Let’s see… Agh! Fuck, this is complicated! The information I know was from what they mentioned when they were making me, kind of like how when you're a baby you take in things you hear people say. Except you know, I’m a fully grown guy with an almost fully developed brain (laughs) I do remember watching the Holy Grail like a thousand times though…

Dr. Belle: Well thank you, You've managed to give us a lot of helpful information.

SCP-2476: Hehe, didn't expect it?

Dr. Belle: Okay, you need to settle down.

<End Log>

Document 2476-8745

The following document was found on SCP-2476's person when recovered. It is reproduced below in its entirety.

Holy Heck! You've just found yourself your very own Mr. Spanish Inquisition by Gamers Against Weed! I didn't expect this. Who is Dr. Wondertainment?

Collect them all and become Mr. Gamer!

01. Mr. Literal Serial Killer

02. Mr. Normie

03. Mr. Bernie Sanders

04. Mr. Get Anything For Free In Any Shop

20. Mr. Sex Number

21. Mr. Heavenly Virtues

22. Mr. Deadly Sins

23. Mr. Original Character

24. Mr. D.A.R.E.

25. Mrs. Gentrification

26. Ms. Mad About Video Games

27. Mr. Meme

28. Mr. Ominous (discontinued)

29. Mr. Destiny

30. Mr. Spanish Inquisition ✔

31. Ms. Zapatista

32. Mr. Hax

33. Mr. Just Has The Tattoo

34. Mr. Top Text and Mr. Bottom Text

35. Mr. Finale