There are no easy answers to questions like this. Parting is always difficult. No amount of goodbyes, and no amount time spent together, will change that.

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by Kothardarastrix

Item#: 6314

Containment Class: uncontained

Secondary Class: none

Disruption Class: none

Risk Class: none

Special Containment Procedures

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Instances of SCP-6314 are to be kept in individual habitats and provided with care appropriate to their species and individual intelligence levels. At the discretion of the project supervisor (currently Dr. Sara T. Kothari), compatible SCP-6314 instances may be allowed to share enclosures temporarily or indefinitely. All instances are to receive at least two hours of social interaction, either with other instances or Foundation personnel, each day. See individual entries for special containment procedures unique to specific instances. Special containment procedures for individual instances override the general containment procedures here if contradictory.

As of current regulations on "Amazing Alliterative Animals", SCP-6314 are to be contained in Hall ██ of Site-66. To prevent possible [DATA EXPUNGED], all 25 instances are never to be contained in the same facility.

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Now that Hypothetical Lifted Veil Scenario 2217 has been realized, all contained SCP-6314 instances (with the exception of SCP-6314-W) are to be released from Foundation custody. Dr. Kothari has been entrusted with the task of redistributing SCP-6314 to the custody of appropriate groups and individuals.

Description

SCP-6314 is the collective designation for a set of 25 anomalous animals which appear to have been designed as pets for children. Each instance is of a different species and displays different anomalous qualities, but all possess the following traits in common:

Negligible senescence. Though adults, SCP-6314 do not appear to age or grow.

Cellular regeneration. SCP-6314 rapidly regenerate from physical injuries.

Perfect health. SCP-6314 have never contracted any illnesses, pathogenic or otherwise.

Anomalous diet. SCP-6314 do not appear to require either food or water to survive, but become increasingly uncomfortable after long periods without either. Instances will consume food appropriate to their species or any form of commercially available pet food, typically preferring the former. Regardless of diet, no waste is produced; food and water vanish upon reaching the instance's stomach. Carnivorous and omnivorous species refuse to consume other vertebrate animals; those capable of speech universally claim that doing so would be "gross."

Enhanced intelligence. Many instances display intelligence roughly on par with a human. Said instances are also fluent in English, though most are illiterate.

Domestication. SCP-6314 are universally docile and friendly toward humans, especially children.

Branding. All instances bear markings somewhere on their bodies which spell "[instance's name], by Dr. Wondertainment". Each instance was recovered alongside, or able to produce when asked, a variation of the same document. Reproduced below is the version that accompanied SCP-6314-S, the first instance contained.

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Wow! You've just found yourself your very own Amazing Alliterative Animal, a brand new series of Fantastic Friends and Perfect Pets brought to you by Dr. Wondertainment!

Find them all and complete the Zany Zoo!

01. Antonio the Artful Axolotl

02. Buffalo the Buffalo Buffalo

03. Carlos the Cool Capybara ✓

04. Dennis the Dirigible Dugong

05. Einstein the Enlightened Echinoderm

06. Ferdinand the Fancy Fish ✓

07. Gwenda the Glamorous Gibbon

08. Hubert the Hilarious Humuhumunukunukuapuaʻa ✓

09. Ignacio the Incredible Iguana ✓

10. Jerome the Jolly Jellyfish ✓

11. Kristen the Kindly Kinkajou ✓

12. Liv the Literate Loris

13. Melanie the Manly Moose

14. Napoleon the Neat Newt ✓

15. Octavian the Outstanding Owl ✓

16. Percival the Preposterous Pangolin ✓

17. Quincy the Quite Quaint Quagga ✓

18. robert the rich rodent

19. Sammy the Superfluous Serpent ✓

20. Tyrone the Totally Tubular Tamandua ✓

21. Ursula the Understanding Uguisu

22. Vivian the Violett Viper (discontinued) ✓

23. Wilhelm the Wise Whelk ✓

24. [DATA X-SPONGED]

25. Yancy the Yeatsian Yak ✓

Check marks were added by Dr. Kothari as additional instances were contained.1 The lack of capitalization for #18 and misspelling for #22 are present on all versions of the document.

Addendum 6314-1

SCP-6314-A, -B, -D, -E, -G, -L, -M, -r, -U, and -X are not in Foundation custody, and in most cases their whereabouts unknown. As these objects are presumably no more dangerous than the instances that are in containment, and would therefore qualify for the anomaly release program were they contained, efforts to locate them have been abandoned.

Attached is a relevant log of messages between Dr. Kothari and Site-66 Director Louis Martin.

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SCIPNET COMMUNICATION LOG

Sara Kothari

10 instances of SCP-6314, over one third of them, remain uncontained. We've got decent leads on -A, -G, -r, and -X, but the other six are complete unknowns. I therefore recommend that the remaining instances be located, contained, and documented before those currently in containment are released.

Louis Martin

Based on the instances currently in containment, it can be safely assumed that the others are no more dangerous than non-anomalous animals. As such anomalies would qualify for the release program were they already in Foundation custody, attempting to contain them in the first place would be counterintuitive.

Sara Kothari

While the remaining instances of SCP-6314 may not be a threat to human life or the nonexistent Veil, they may themselves be in danger. Although these animals are immortal, they are nonetheless capable of suffering. If the unknown instances are in the possession of groups who are mistreating or exploiting them, it is our obligation to protect these creatures by removing them from such situations, even if it is just to redistribute them to better homes.

Louis Martin

The welfare of objects not requiring containment is beyond the scope of the Foundation's mission.

Sara Kothari

Consider, then, the psychological well-being of the instances that are in containment. Several instances have expressed a desire to reunite with the rest of their "family," and claim to miss their "siblings". They will all be negatively affected by the redistribution of instances to different locations, but I believe that allowing them all to briefly reunite beforehand (while ensuring that all 25 are never in the same facility at once, of course) would mitigate this effect somewhat by providing some sense of closure to them.

Louis Martin

The "psychological well-being" of objects not requiring containment is beyond the scope of the Foundation's mission.

Addendum 6314-2

SCP-6314-C sleeping in its habitat

Hubert the Hilarious Humuhumunukunukuapua'a in Hubert the Hilarious Humuhumunukunukuapua'a's aquarium

SCP-6314-N being held by Researcher James (age 13)

SCP-6314-C is a male Hydrochoerus hydrochaeris (capybara). The air within a 2.4-meter radius of the object remains at a constant 21.1 degrees Celsius regardless of other conditions.

Hubert the Hilarious Humuhumunukunukuapaua'a is a male humuhumunukunukuapaua'a. Cannot be referred to with pronouns, nicknames, abbreviations, or other terms that do not contain the word "humuhumunukunukuapaua'a". References to groups of which Hubert the Hilarious Humuhumunukunukuapaua'a is a member (such as "SCP-6314") are not affected by this property.

SCP-6314-J is a male Aurelia aurita (moon jellyfish). It lacks stinging cells, and patches of dark pigmentation on its bell form the shape of a "smiley face".

SCP-6314-N is a male Neurergus kaiseri (Kaiser's mountain newt). When held by a human and instructed to "Clean my room!" the object telekinetically moves nearby waste and dirty laundry to the appropriate receptacles.

Due to their animal-level intelligence and relatively mundane properties, SCP-6314-C, -H, -J, and -N were entrusted to GoI-466 ("Wilson's Wildlife Solutions") for appropriate care and potential future adoption. For the sake of simplicity, Drs. Kothari and Carlson delivered these instances to WWS personally, and were assigned a Foundation-owned Tesla Cybertruck for this purpose.

Audio and video below, and elsewhere in the file, was recorded by Drs. Kothari and Carlsons' EyePods.2

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Video Log

> RECORDING STARTED <

The truck arrives at Wilson's Wildlife Solutions's main facility, parks itself, and turns off its engine. Drs. Kothari and Carlsons' EyePods are resting on the back center seat.

Dr. Kothari
Isn't there supposed to be somebody waiting for us?

Researcher Carlson
Probably just got held up. I bet they're a lot busier than usual, what with the Veil and all that.

Dr. Kothari sighs. She turns on the car radio and begins cycling through the available FM stations.

female voice
…stolen from the graves of Broken Church members…

female voice
…1-900-ANAHITA for the time…

male voice
…down drooling path….

female voice
…as the Survivor, donating his blood and organs…

female voice
…issued a statement about the Ichabod Campaign…

male voice
…Horizon Initiative's Satanic lies!

Dr. Kothari sighs and turns off the radio.

Researcher Carlson
Yeah, radio's kinda trash these days. Kinda surprised the car still has it, honestly. All the good stuff's on streaming.

A man emerges from the WWS building, hastily putting on a raincoat. He spots the cybertruck and begins jogging toward it. Dr. Kothari gets out of the vehicle to greet him.

Burke
Kothari?

Dr. Kothari
That's me. Who are you?

Burke
Jacob Burke. Nice to meet ya.

Burke and Kothari shake hands.

Dr. Kothari
I thought I would be meeting with Ms. Wilson.

Burke
So did she, but then we got a call about some giant purple platypus thing rooting through people's trash and she had to go deal with that instead.

Dr. Kothari
She's still working in the field?

Burke
Not normally, no, but we've been so busy since the Veil dropped that we need all hands on deck.

Dr. Kothari
I see.

Burke
[scowls] Yeah, we're a bit short on people and funds these days.

Dr. Kothari
I'm sorry. For what it's worth, I was against nullifying the Agreement.

Burke
[sigh] Yep, me too. But here we are anyway, running ourselves ragged.

Dr. Kothari
That bad, huh?

Burke
You have no idea. Now that everybody knows about us, we're getting calls from across the continent, and half of 'em false alarms. People see a weird-colored spider and lose their damn minds. The paperwork alone is…well, you probably don't wanna hear about it.

Dr. Kothari
If it's any consolation, things are hectic on our end, too.

Burke
[chuckles] Yeah, I bet. [shakes head] Well, enough gripin'. Let's see these Perfect Pets.

Dr. Kothari
Elroy!

Researcher Carlson gets out and walks to the back of the truck, followed by his EyePod. The tonneau cover retracts automatically, revealing SCP-6314-C, -H, -J, and -N and their respective containers within. Burke and Dr. Kothari approach.

Researcher Carlson
Ta-da!

Dr. Kothari
Meet Carlos, Hubert the Hilarious Humuhumunukunukuapua'a, Jerome, and Napoleon.

Burke
What do they do, again? Other 'n bein' immortal, I mean. I didn't get a chance to look at the documents you sent us.

Dr. Kothari
Uh, okay. Carlos keeps the area around him at 70 degrees, Napoleon telekinetically cleans your room if you ask him to, and Hubert the Hilarious Humuhumunukunukuapua'a - well, you can figure it out.

Burke
What about Jerome?

Dr. Kothari
Absolutely nothing.

Burke
Oh.

Dr. Kothari
We think there may have been budget cuts over at WonderCo or something.

Burke
Well, if it makes 'im easier to deal with… [bends over to look at SCP-6314-C] Y'know we actually have another capybara?

Dr. Kothari
Really?

Burke
Yeah. I bet she'll be glad to have the company.

Dr. Kothari
That's great! Anything else you need to know?

Burke
[stands up] Uh, don't think so. I'll go over the docs again and we'll get these fellas into some habitats as soon as we can. I'm sure they'll be adopted in no time. What kid wouldn't want an immortal pet, right?

Dr. Kothari
…right.

Several seconds of silence pass, until Researcher Carlson clears his throat.

Burke
Welp, I got no time to stand around here gabbin'. Y'all wanna help me with these? Just help me get 'em over to the door and we'll take it from there.

Dr. Kothari
Sure thing.

Burke picks up SCP-6314-C's cage, Carlson lifts Hubert the Hilarious Humuhumunukunukuapua'a's tank, and Kothari takes -J's and -N's. They carry the instances to the door of the shelter and set them on the ground nearby.

Burke
Thanks.

Dr. Kothari
Don't mention it.

Dr. Kothari squats down to the level of the SCP-6314 instances.

Dr. Kothari
Bye, guys. I'm gonna miss you all.

Burke
[quietly, to Researcher Carlson] Wait, these 'uns can't talk, can they?

Researcher Carlson shakes his head. Burke nods. Dr. Kothari stands.

Dr. Kothari
Alright, let's go.

Burke
Best of luck, y'all.

Dr. Kothari
And the same to you.

Drs. Kothari and Carlson return to the vehicle. The EyePods return to the back seat.

Researcher Carlson
AVI, take us back to Site-66.

Anderson Vehicular Intelligence

Returning to Site-66.

The truck un-parks itself and exits the parking lot.

> RECORDING ENDED <

Addendum 6314-3

SCP-6314-F is a male Puntius semifasciolatus (gold barb fish) possessing a miniaturized human face. A tiny top hat is permanently affixed over its dorsal fin.

Due to their obvious similarities, SCP-6314-F was entrusted to the former SCP-527, now designated PoI 527/01 in accordance with anomaly release policy. Drs. Kothari and Carlson delivered SCP-6314-F to PoI 527/01 shortly before his departure from Site-19.

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Video Log

> RECORDING STARTED <

Music is faintly audible through the walls of the former SCP-527's containment chamber.

PoI 527/01
…a lot to drag me away from you…

Dr. Kothari knocks on the the door. Singing abruptly ceases, followed by the music.

PoI 527/01
Hello?

Dr. Kothari
SC- uh, Mister Fish?

PoI 527/01
Yes?

Dr. Kothari:
I have something for you. May I come in?

PoI 527/01
Uh. I can't stop you, can I?

Dr. Kothari
Um.

Researcher Carlson
You don't work with humanoids much, do you Sara?

Dr. Kothari
Well, uh, we're coming in.

Dr. Kothari enters the containment chamber. PoI 527/01 is standing in front of his desk, on which a portable CD player and an empty CD case rest next to a small potted cactus. A half-full suitcase is open on the floor next to PoI 527/01's bed, which is covered with partially folded clothes.

PoI 527/01
What is it?

Dr. Kothari
Elroy?

Researcher Carlson enters the chamber, carrying SCP-6314-F's fishbowl.

PoI 527/01
[crosses his arms] Is this some kind of a joke?

Dr. Kothari
Just take a look.

Researcher Carlson places the fishbowl on the desk and steps back. PoI 527/01 leans over to examine it. SCP-6314-F swims up to the glass.

Dr. Kothari
We're not sure, but based on the skin tone, we think-

PoI 527/01
[quietly] That's my face. [PoI 527/01 lowers his arms.]

Dr. Kothari
…yeah.

PoI 527/01 places both hands on the desk and leans in closer to SCP-6314-F, until his face is almost touching the glass. He remains like this for several seconds.

Dr. Kothari
You can keep him, if you want.

PoI 527/01
[stands] What?

Dr. Kothari
He's part of the anomaly release program, like you.

PoI 527/01 stares at Dr. Kothari for several seconds. His piscine face is unreadable.

Dr. Kothari
Um, you don't have to keep him if you-

PoI 527/01 removes his hat.

PoI 527/01
[choking up slightly] Thank you, Dr…

Dr. Kothari
Kothari.

PoI 527/01
Thank you, Dr. Kothari.

PoI 527/01 offers Dr. Kothari a handshake, which she accepts.

Dr. Kothari
You're welcome, Mister Fish.

PoI 527/01
You have no idea how much this means to me. To actually see my face, my real face…it's…really something.

Dr. Kothari
[smiles] Consider it a going away gift.

PoI 527/01
The best I ever got.

PoI 527/01 replaces his hat.

Dr. Kothari
Where are you going, by the way?

PoI 527/01
Back to Boston. Gonna see if I can track down Doctor Dubs, give him a piece of my mind. [turns to look at SCP-6314-F] Heck, maybe she can switch us back! They did it once, right?

Dr. Kothari
Anything's possible.

PoI 527/01 looks at SCP-6314-F and adjusts his hat.

PoI 527/01
Is it true that the company's gone downhill since they went public? Hot was complaining about it the last time I talked to him.

Dr. Kothari
Well…I don't know, I never had Wondertainment toys as a kid.

PoI 527/01
Fair enough.

A brief awkward silence passes. PoI 527/01 adjusts his hat again.

Dr. Kothari
Well, I hope you find what you're looking for.

PoI 527/01
Thanks! I hope that you do too.

Dr. Kothari appears confused.

PoI 527/01
Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got to finish packing.

PoI 527/01 turns his music back on.

Dr. Kothari
What?

PoI 527/01 resumes packing. He seems not to have heard Dr. Kothari.

Researcher Carlson
Let's go.

PoI 527/01
…I bless the rains down in Africa…

Dr. Kothari
…yeah. Let's go.

Drs. Kothari and Carlson exit the chamber.

> RECORDING ENDED <

Addendum 6314-4

SCP-6314-I. Object was juggling small rocks, but ceased upon seeing the camera, claiming to be camera shy.

SCP-6314-T. Surfboard not pictured.

SCP-6314-I is a male Amblyrhynchus cristatus (marine iguana). The object can perform a variety of "tricks," including various feats of acrobatics, dancing, and singing, but is reluctant to do so before large groups, claiming "stage fright".

SCP-6314-T is a male Tamandua tetradactyla (southern tamandua). The object can telekinetically manipulate bodies of water and its surfboard3 to perform assorted tricks. Both instances are capable of speech, though SCP-6314-T possesses an exaggerated Southern California accent.

Due to their human-level intelligence and desire and ability to perform "tricks," SCP-6314-I and -T were entrusted to Herman Fuller's Circus of the Disquieting. Though the Circus was not located near Site-66 at the time, its liaison Victor Chan offered to send Circus representatives to the Site via Way. To prevent possible security breaches or violent incidents, the meeting was instead arranged for nearby public location.

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Video Log

> RECORDING STARTED <

Drs. Kothari and Carlson are seated in their vehicle at the appointed rendezvous location. It is raining. Light from a nearby holographic billboard dimly illuminates the interior of the vehicle.

Dr. Kothari checks her watch.

Dr. Kothari
They're late.

Researcher Carlson
Well, I have heard that dimensional travel is a little finicky.

Dr. Kothari
I think they're doing it on purpose. As a flex.

Researcher Carlson
Could be.

Dr. Kothari leans forward, peering through the raindrops on the windshield to read the billboard more clearly.

Dr. Kothari
Oh, you've got to be kidding me.

Researcher Carlson
What?

Dr. Kothari points out the windshield.

Researcher Carlson
"Get your ass to Mars?"4 Well, it's not like we didn't know he was a fan of the movie. Look what you're sitting in. [Researcher Carlson raps on the roof of the cybertruck.]

Dr. Kothari
It's ridiculous.

Researcher Carlson
I think it's cool.

A kaleidoscopic, multicolored Way opens in the doorway of a nearby abandoned building. PoIs-4657 ("Icky the magic Clown"), -4658 ("The Man With The Upside Down Face"), and -4659 ("Li'l Lollipop") emerge. The Man opens a comically oversized transparent umbrella, under which all three individuals shelter.

Dr. Kothari raises the hood on her raincoat, steps out of the vehicle (followed by her EyePod) and approaches the three figures. Researcher Carlson also exits the vehicle and begins retrieving the SCP-6314 instances.

Icky the Magic Clown
[sarcastically] Well, the tables sure do turn, don't they Lolly?

Li'l Lollipop
[with equal sarcasm] They sure do, Icky!

Icky
One day Essie's trying to take your friends away, the next day they're bringing you more!

Lollipop
These are strange times, aren't they?

Icky
They certainly are, Lolly! They certainly are.

Dr. Kothari
[sighs] Ringmaster.

Icky
[seriously] Essie.

Icky extends a hand to Dr. Kothari. Dr. Kothari moves to shake it.

The Man With The Upside Down Face
Icky…

Dr. Kothari hesitates.

Icky
What?

Li'l Lollipop giggles, then covers her mouth. The Man squints at Icky.

Icky
Ah, fine. [Icky raises both hands, revealing the joy buzzer on her right palm.]

Dr. Kothari lowers her hand and takes several steps back.

Icky
Relax! It wasn't gonna kill ya! We're legit now, remember?

Dr. Kothari
…yeah. [pause] So I guess the Lifted Veil's been good for business?

Icky
Yep! It's amazing what you can accomplish when you're not being hunted by fascist maniacs!

Dr. Kothari
We don't do that anymore. And we're not fascists.

Icky
Oh, sure.

The Man With The Upside Down Face clears his throat.

Dr. Kothari
Hurry up with those cages, Elroy!

Researcher Carlson
[grumbling] I'd be faster if I had help.

Researcher Carlson carries the cages of SCP-6314-I and -T from behind the truck and places them in front of The Man.

SCP-6314-T
Whoa! Your face is like, upside-down, brah! Gnarly!

The Man
Does he always talk like that?

SCP-6314-T
Totally.

Dr. Kothari
You get used to it.

Icky
[bends down to look at SCP-6314-I] What's Ignacio here do, again?

Dr. Kothari
Dancing, singing, acrobatics. Juggling. You know.

The Man
Looks like a regular iguana.

Dr. Kothari
He's shy.

Li'l Lollipop
Aw! [kneels beside Icky to see SCP-6314-I] You don't have to be scared! We're all your friends here! Not like mean old Essie! [frowns exaggeratedly]

Dr. Kothari
[crosses her arms] I assure you that I am…was very kind to these animals.

SCP-6314-T
Yeah, Sara's chill.

Dr. Kothari
Thanks, Tyrone.

Icky
[straightens up] Well, they're not exactly disquieting…but they'll fit right in at the petting zoo!

SCP-6314-T
Right on!

Dr. Kothari
Take care of them, okay?

Icky
We will! It's not like we kidnap people and stick them in rooms by themselves forever!

Dr. Kothari
Yeah, you just give them irreversible physical transformations and lifelong chemical dependencies.

Lolly seems taken aback.

Icky scowls. The joy buzzer on her palm crackles with electricity.

The Man places a hand on Icky's shoulder.

The Man
Are we done here?

Kothari
Are we?

Icky
We are. So get lost.

Keeping a wary eye on Icky, Dr. Kothari kneels down to be eye level with SCP-6314-T.

Kothari
Goodbye, Tyrone.

SCP-6314-T
[sadly] Later, dude. [SCP-6314-T makes the "hang loose" gesture with its right forepaw.]

Dr. Kothari crouches down to SCP-6314-I.

Dr. Kothari
Goodbye, Ignacio.

SCP-6314-I waves.

Lollipop
Aw…

Dr. Kothari stands, glares at Icky, and returns to the truck.

Icky sneers.

Researcher Carlson
Uh, pleasure doing business?

Icky
Nope.

Researcher Carlson
Right.

Researcher Carlson returns to the vehicle, which starts itself. As the truck drives itself away, The Man hands the umbrella to Icky, then picks up the cages and carries them back into the open Way. Icky waves mockingly at Drs. Kothari and Carlson. Lollipop blows a raspberry at them.

Drs. Carlson and Kothari sit in silence. After almost a minute, Dr. Kothari turns the radio back on.

male voice
…expected to continue raining for the next…

Dr. Kothari cries out in frustration and forcefully turns off the radio.

Researcher Carlson
Relax. Where we're going, we don't need radios. AVI, turn on bluetooth.

Anderson Vehicular Intelligence
Bluetooth on.

A chime plays as Researcher Carlson's cranial implant connects to the car stereo. "She" by Shattered Deus begins to play.

Dr. Kothari
What the…"Shattered Deus"?

Researcher Carlson
Yeah. This album's my favorite, but Brass Rites and Silicon Rituals is pretty good too.

Dr. Kothari
What?! Are you a Maxwellist now?!

Researcher Carlson
Tesla Society, actually.

Dr. Kothari
Since when?!

Researcher Carlson
Uh, since WAN-MEKHANE returned and saved us all from the fleshgod apocalypse? If that's not a good reason to convert I don't know what is. And the ocular implants are pretty cool, too.

Dr. Kothari
Ocular…do you have any idea how many Foundation personnel have been killed by the Church of the Broken God?

Researcher Carlson
Do you have any idea how many Church members have been killed by the Foundation?

Dr. Kothari
That's not the same thing.

Researcher Carlson
How is it different?

Dr. Kothari
They were trying to-

Researcher Carlson
Trying to what, fix God and save the world? You tellin' me they shouldn't have done that, that we shoulda just kept all Her fragments in containment and let the FLESH win?

Dr. Kothari
No, of course not.

Researcher Carlson
Then what are you saying?

Dr. Kothari
[silence]

Researcher Carlson
That's what I thought.

Dr. Kothari
[quietly] Sorry.

Researcher Carlson
[sighs] 'salright. You'll get used to it eventually.

Dr. Kothari
[silence]

> RECORDING ENDED <

Addendum 6314-5

SCP-6314-K politely requesting more honey

SCP-6314-K is a female Potos flavus (kinkajou). Instance is exceptionally friendly and polite and enjoys "cuddling".

Due to its human-level intelligence and negligible entertainment or educational value, SCP-6314-K was not suitable for adoption by the organizations to which previous instances had been entrusted. Dr. Kothari proposed that the object be used as intended, as a child's pet, and adopted by a family familiar with anomalous phenomena. The adoption took place at Site-66, as the chosen family were retired Foundation personnel with sufficient clearance to know of its existence and lived reasonably close by.

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Video Log

> RECORDING STARTED <

Dr. Kothari is in her office reviewing paperwork. SCP-6314-K sits in a cage on her desk, licking the last remaining honey from a mostly empty jar.

Draven Kondraki knocks quietly on the open door of Dr. Kothari's office.

Dr. Kothari
Hmm? Hey! Come on in.

Draven Kondraki
Thanks.

SCP-6314-K
Hello, Mr. Kondraki!

Kondraki
Hi! You must be Kristen.

SCP-6314-K
That's me!

Kondraki
You sure are adorable.

SCP-6314-K
Aw, thank you!

Kondraki
You're welcome.

Kondraki sits down.

Dr. Kothari
So, what do you think?

Kondraki
I think she'll be great. I was up all night last night reading about kinkajous, and I'm sure we can take care of her. And I already showed Ben a picture, so it's too late to turn back anyway.

Kothari and Kondraki laugh.

Dr. Kothari
That's good to hear. I took the liberty of putting together these care and feeding instructions, but Kristen can probably tell you everything you need to know. Can't you, girl?

SCP-6314-K
I sure can! Don't worry, I'm easy to take care of. You'll never have to take me to the vet, and I'm already potty trained. I like fruits and honey better than dog food, though.

Kondraki
Don't worry, we'll get you plenty of fruit.

SCP-6314-K
And honey?

Kondraki
And honey.

SCP-6314-K
Yay!

Dr. Kothari
Alright. If you'll just sign these papers…

Dr. Kothari slides several forms and a pen across the table to Kondraki.

Kondraki
Sure thing.

Kondraki begins filling out the forms.

Dr. Kothari
How's retirement treating you?

Kondraki
Pretty good so far. My pension's not much, but James gets enough for ten people.

Dr. Kothari
He deserves enough for a hundred.

Kondraki
[smiles] Yeah, but I'm not complaining.

Several seconds of silence. Kondraki continues filling out paperwork. Kothari fidgets with her hands. SCP-6314-K continues licking the honey jar.

Dr. Kothari
So, uh…

Kondraki
Hmm? [looks up]

Dr. Kothari
If you don't mind me asking-

Kondraki
About James?

Dr. Kothari
Uh, yeah. How, uh, how is he?

Kondraki
He's okay. Nothing will ever be normal again, of course, but I don't guess it ever really was to begin with.

Dr. Kothari
[nods] Give him my regards. [pauses] And my thanks.

Kondraki
I will.

Kondraki notices Dr. Kothari's EyePod, resting on a filing cabinet behind her. He scowls.

Dr. Kothari
What?

Kondraki
[gestures at the EyePod with his pen] Just noticed Big Brother back there.

Dr. Kothari
Hmm? [she looks over her shoulder] Oh, the EyePod? That's just to make documentation easier.

Kondraki
Pfft. Is that what they told you?

Dr. Kothari
What do you mean?

Kondraki
Way I heard it, those things are here to make sure people don't run off and join the Insurgency. You remember how much of a problem that was at first, don't you?

Dr. Kothari
No, I - well, yes, I remember, but I don't think - that's not why.

Kondraki
Uh-huh. Well, I'm still glad I got out before they deployed those things.

Kondraki finishes the paperwork and slides it back to Dr. Kothari.

Kondraki
Here you go. Anything else I need to know?

Dr. Kothari
Just that I really appreciate this. It's hard, finding homes for these guys.

Kondraki
Hey, I should be thanking you. Ben's gonna have the coolest pet in school, isn't he, Kristen?

SCP-6314-K
You bet!

Kondraki
And the nicest one, too.

Kondraki extends a finger through SCP-6314-K's cage. She grasps his finger with one hand.

Dr. Kothari and Kondraki stand and shake hands.

Dr. Kothari
Fair warning, though, I might be coming to check up on her now and then.

Kondraki
[laughs] I look forward to it.

SCP-6314-K
Me too!

Kondraki
Ready to go, Kristen?

SCP-6314-K
Yep!

Kondraki carefully picks up SCP-6314-K's cage.

Dr. Kothari
Goodbye, Kristen. I'll see you soon.

SCP-6314-K
Goodbye, Sara. Good luck!

Dr. Kothari
Thanks.

SCP-6314-K
You're welcome!

Kondraki
Bye, Sara.

Dr. Kothari
Bye.

Kondraki leaves with SCP-6314-K.

Dr. Kothari turns and looks at her EyePod. She frowns.

> RECORDING ENDED <

Addendum 6314-6

SCP-6314-O emerging from its nest upon hearing that Researcher James (age 13) needed help learning multiplication tables

SCP-6314-O is a male Micrathene whitneyi (elf owl). Object is highly intelligent and capable of speech. When asked for assistance with a homework assignment, it gains the knowledge necessary to complete the assignment and attempts to help complete it. The gained knowledge is lost upon completion of the assignment.

Due to its educational value, SCP-6314-O has been relocated to the International Center for the Study of Unified Thaumatology in Three Portlands, where it will be part of that institution's tutoring program.

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SCIPNET COMMUNICATION LOG

Sara Kothari

When the release of SCP-6314 instances was planned, it was my understanding that I would be placed in charge of the redistribution process. It seems, however, that this is not the case, as SCP-6314-O was removed from containment by a Global Occult Coalition representative this morning, before I arrived. I did not have a chance to assist in this transfer of custody, brief the GOC rep about the object, or inspect the conditions in which it would be transported and kept to ensure the object's safety. I do not object to SCP-6314-O's transfer to ICSUT, but I do object to this apparent override of my authority on this object, and I sincerely hope that this is the last time such a thing will occur.

Louis Martin

You approved the transfer and ICSUT and the GOC filed all the necessary paperwork. The transfer proceeded without you because your presence was not required.

Sara Kothari

While I did approve the transfer, I did so under the impression that I would be able to personally supervise it. It is my job to ensure that SCP-6314-O is kept secure and protected both during the transport and at his new home, but I have been denied this opportunity. I fear that SCP-6314-O may come to harm in my absence.

Louis Martin

As I said, your presence was not required. ICSUT and the GOC are fully capable of caring for SCP-6314-O, as you attested when you first approved this transfer.

Sara Kothari

I just wanted the chance to say goodbye. Don't take that away from me too.

Addendum 6314-7

Unable to determine context or content of above photograph.

SCP-6314-P is not believed to exist, as everyone knows there is no such thing as a pangolin.5 The purpose of its inclusion in the document that accompanies other SCP-6314 instances is unknown. It is likewise unclear why a habitat for a small mammal was constructed between those of SCP-6314-O and SCP-6314-Q, when this occurred, or who was responsible. When this chamber was first noticed by Researcher Carlson, it contained the following items:

vegetation normally native to tropical areas

traces of powdered ant remains, various vitamins and minerals, and agar

the following note:

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Did you know pangolins were once the most trafficked mammal in the world? Well, you used to. They were being killed by the thousands, during the War. People ate their ground-up scales, thinking that would cure the Red Death. They almost went the way of the elephant. But you didn't do a thing about it. You had in your hands something that could save the whole pangolin family, but all you did was keep him as a pet. Even after the Veil lifted, that's all you had in mind for him. You were going to give Percival to Wilson's Wildlife Solutions and let the rest of them die.

Lucky for the pangolins, I decided to intervene. It wasn't easy to alter his effect like this, but it was worth it. Now, instead of being the most trafficked mammal on the planet, they're probably its safest. That includes Percival - he's safe with me, and you needn't worry about him anymore, even if you do somehow manage to remember that he exists.

By the way – Mel (you know, the moose) wanted me to tell you that xe's perfectly safe and happy where xe is. Liv is fine, too, from what I hear.

- L.S.

P.S. - Don't think that the Hand is gone just because the Veil is. We're glad that you've released your prisoners, but you'd better stay on your best behavior. We're still watching.

As everyone knows there is no such thing as a pangolin,6 it is believed that this note constitutes some form of subterfuge or attempted deception by "L.S."

Addendum 6314-8

SCP-6314-Q is a male Equus quagga quagga (quagga). It possesses no notable properties beyond those shared by all instances.

As SCP-6314-Q is potentially immortal and one of only (at time of writing) three living quaggas, it has considerable conservation value. After experimentation with a female quagga7 determined that the object's offspring do not inherit its anomalous properties, all specimens were entrusted to the Quagga Project for use in quagga re-breeding efforts.

Logs relating to the transfer of SCP-6314-Q's custody have been omitted, as they did not involve notable interactions with sentient anomalies or Groups of Interest.

Update: Shortly after SCP-6314-Q's transfer, the Quagga Project and all its assets were acquired by Marshall, Carter, and Dark LTD. All quagga specimens, including SCP-6314-Q, were relocated to an unknown location, and the object's whereabouts remain unknown. Dr. Kothari was not informed of this development, as it occurred after the events of Addendum 12.

Addendum 6314-9

SCP-6314-S posing for the camera in its habitat

SCP-6314-S is a male Lampropeltis elapsoides (scarlet kingsnake). Though intelligent and capable of speech, its vocabulary consists almost entirely of words beginning with the letter "s". It possesses a cognitohazardous effect that limits speech directed at the object to such words.

SCP-6314-V is a female Micruroides euryxanthus (Sonoran coral snake), though scales that would normally be red on a non-anomalous coral snake are instead a vivid violet hue. Instance has similar properties to SCP-6314-S, but related to the letter "v" instead of "s". Unlike other SCP-6314 instances, -V is generally hostile toward humans, particularly those it perceives as authority figures. However, Dr. Kothari has gained the instance's trust over time and with the assistance of SCP-6314-S.

SCP-6314-S and -V share a close emotional bond and are able to communicate with each other nonverbally. For this reason, and because SCP-6314-S's presence seems to have a calming effect on -V, both instances were contained in the same habitat.

Much like SCP-6314-K, SCP-6314-S was slated for adoption by retired Foundation personnel. SCP-6314-V was deemed unacceptable for adoption or transfer to GoI custody, however, as its human-level intelligence, venomous nature, general hostility, and documented anarchist tendencies made it non-negligibly more dangerous than a non-anomalous animal.

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SCIPNET COMMUNICATION LOG

Sara Kothari

While SCP-6314-V is normally hostile towards people, I have been working with her for years and have gained her trust and cooperation over that time. Additionally, SCP-6314-V is consistently less aggressive when in the presence of SCP-6314-S, the instance with whom I have the most experience. I therefore propose that these instances simply be kept in containment. Although this would be an exception to the anomaly release protocol, I feel that it is a justifiable one, given the unique relationship between these two instances.

Louis Martin

I cannot allow exceptions to the release program for such a trivial reason. There is no reason -S cannot be adopted, and Site-66 is well-equipped to contain -V, with or without any marginal decrease in hostility due to your presence or -S’s.

Sara Kothari

I still feel that separating both instances would be detrimental to the mental health of both, leading to an unnecessary increase in -V’s aggression levels. To avoid this undesirable outcome, I propose that they both be released from containment and entrusted to my custody. For reasons previously stated, I believe that I am the ideal caretaker for both instances.

Louis Martin

I cannot grant this request. -S is to be released from Foundation custody, including the personal custody of active Foundation personnel.

Louis Martin

Additionally, please note that transfers to the custody of retired personnel would also be subject to my approval, and that it would be inappropriate for a retired employee to adopt an object whose containment they previously supervised.

Logged below is Dr. Kothari's initial attempt to separate SCP-6314-S from SCP-6314-V.

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Video Log

> RECORDING STARTED <

Dr. Kothari enters the shared enclosure of SCP-6314-S and -V, which are curled in the corner under a sunlamp.

Dr. Kothari
Salutations, Sammy.

SCP-6314-S
'Sup, Sara!

Dr. Kothari sits down on a large rock. SCP-6314-S slithers up to her.

Dr. Kothari
So, uh, did Sammy see the surrounding situation?

SCP-6314-S
Sadly. Will Sammy soon be sent somewhere?

Dr. Kothari
Sorry

SCP-6314-S
Somewhere scary?

Dr. Kothari
[shakes her head] Simply somewhere 'cides Site-66. Somewhere safe.

SCP-6314-S
[sighs] So Sammy and Sara will soon separate?

Dr. Kothari
Sadly.

SCP-6314-S
Seriously sad.

SCP-6314-S coils around Dr. Kothari's arm, "hugging" her. Dr. Kothari swallows nervously.

Dr. Kothari
So, uh, Sammy

SCP-6314-S
Si, señora?

Dr. Kothari
Soon, serpents shall separate.

Dr. Kothari points at SCP-6314-S, then SCP-6314-V.

SCP-6314-S
Say second?

Dr. Kothari
She'll be sent somewhere separate.

SCP-6314-S slithers back onto floor.

SCP-6314-S
Shock! Slander!

Dr. Kothari shakes her head.

Dr. Kothari
Serious.

SCP-6314-S slithers over to SCP-6314-V.

SCP-6314-S
Sara shan't separate Sammy and sweetheart!

Dr. Kothari
Sorry, Sammy, but superior says-

SCP-6314-S
Screw superior! Sammy stays!

SCP-6314-V
Verily!

Dr. Kothari
[pleading] Sammy, she's sinister! Not safe!

SCP-6314-S
She's safe for Sammy!

Dr. Kothari
Sorry, Sammy. [pause] Should say sayonara to sweetheart soon.

SCP-6314-S
Shan't!

Dr. Kothari attempts to say something, but is silenced by the effects of SCP-6314-S and/or -V.

SCP-6314-V
Vanish, villain!

Dr. Kothari
Vivian…

SCP-6314-V
Vamoose or violence!

SCP-6314-V hisses loudly and bares her fangs.

Dr. Kothari
Sammy?

SCP-6314-S
Scram, Sara!

Dr. Kothari
S….v….ah… [Dr. Kothari continues to stutter, attempting to say things but being repeatedly silenced by the two objects' effects. She looks to be on the verge of tears.]

SCP-6314-S
Scoot!

Dr. Kothari turns abruptly and hurries from the room.

> RECORDING ENDED <

Following this incident, Dr. Kothari requested more time to locate an appropriate post-containment home for SCP-6314-S. Director Martin granted this request, on the condition of no further delays in the redistribution of SCP-6314 instances.

Addendum 6314-10

SCP-6314-W in storage

SCP-6314-W is the vacant shell of an unknown species of sea snail. When the shell is asked a question, the voice of an elderly male speaks from within and provides general advice in response. Object remembers content of previous conversations.

Due to its general usefulness, and to prevent the future assembly of all 25 instances in the same location, SCP-6314-W will remain in Foundation custody. Reassignment to other personnel or permanent storage is pending, but it remains in Dr. Kothari's possession for the time being.

Below is a transcript of the last recorded conversation between Dr. Kothari and SCP-6314-W.

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Video Log

> RECORDING STARTED <

Dr. Kothari
Wilhelm, are you there?

SCP-6314-W
I'm always here for you, Sara.

Dr. Kothari
I'm confused.

SCP-6314-W
What about?

Dr. Kothari
The other animals. Your siblings.

SCP-6314-W
Because you don't know where to send them?

Dr. Kothari
No. Well, yeah, I…I don't know.

SCP-6314-W
Because you don't want to send them there.

Dr. Kothari
[sighs] Yeah, I guess that's it. I don't want to send you all away. You're like family to me.

SCP-6314-W
Loss is an inevitable part of life, Sara. Terrible, but inevitable.

Dr. Kothari
I know, but…it shouldn't have to be, at least not for you. You all live forever. You should able to spend forever together, shouldn't you?

SCP-6314-W
Perhaps, but that isn't really what you want, is it?

Dr. Kothari
[pause] No.

SCP-6314-W
Then what do you want?

Dr. Kothari
I want you all to spend forever with me.

SCP-6314-W
Because we are like family, right?

Dr. Kothari
Right. I've spent what, twelve years with you all? Almost the whole time I've worked here.

SCP-6314-W
It's been a long time.

Dr. Kothari
And so, losing you like this…I can't take it.

SCP-6314-W
Now, Sara, isn't that kind of selfish?

Dr. Kothari
What?

SCP-6314-W
When Dr. Wondertainment made us, we were intended to bring happiness to many people. Not just you, and not just each other. Isn't being separated the best way to do that?

Dr. Kothari
…fine, yeah, I guess it is selfish. But that doesn't change the way I feel.

SCP-6314-W
Of course not. And how, exactly, do you feel?

Dr. Kothari
Um. Sad? Lonely?

SCP-6314-W
Afraid, perhaps?

Dr. Kothari
Yes, afraid.

SCP-6314-W
Of what?

Dr. Kothari
Of losing people I care about.

SCP-6314-W
Has this happened to you before?

Dr. Kothari
[scoffs] Of course it has. You said it was inevitable, remember?

SCP-6314-W
Let me rephrase, then. Of the times that this has happened, which one does this feel like the most?

Dr. Kothari
Well, that's easy. [deep breath] When I was a little girl, I had a pet beagle. Her name was Maria, like the Santana song. She was the cutest darn thing I ever saw. And I loved her, I think, the same way I love you guys.

SCP-6314-W
As a pet?

Dr. Kothari

As a friend. But…ah, but I didn't appreciate her. I don't know how many days Maria was out there in the yard, but I was inside playing video games or watching TV. I should've been out there with her, playing with my friend instead of wasting our time together, but I was stupid and - well, selfish, I guess. So when Maria got sick, I felt sad, yeah, but the main thing I felt was regret. Regret that I didn't spend more time playing with her when she was around. Regret that she died scared and alone in a vet's office, instead of old and content and surrounded by her family, even though there wasn't really anything I could've done about that. I didn't even get to see her afterwards. They just burned her and stuck her in a box. It was just…so…horrible. No closure or anything. I didn't even get to say goodbye. She was just…gone. And now it's happening again. I'm having to give you away, but I'm not ready to lose any of you, because I want more time.

Don't you have something to say?

Anything at all?

I thought you were supposed to be wise.

SCP-6314-W
Sara…

Dr. Kothari
What?

SCP-6314-W
There are no easy answers to questions like this. Parting is always difficult. No amount of goodbyes, and no amount time spent together, will change that. If anything, that will just make it harder.

Dr. Kothari
But it doesn't have to be goodbye, does it? It shouldn't be.

SCP-6314-W
I'm afraid that it does, Sara. If what you've told me is true, then there's not much you can do about this.

Dr. Kothari
[tearfully] Well, you're a lot of help.

SCP-6314-W
I'm sorry, Sara. But if it's any consolation, I don't think this time was wasted. And I don't think my siblings do, either.

Dr. Kothari
Oh yeah?

SCP-6314-W
It's been twelve years, you said? Since you found Sammy at that pet store?

Dr. Kothari
Almost.

SCP-6314-W
Now consider this: We weren't created much longer ago than that. Many of us never had any owner besides you. You've been here almost our entire lives, and you've been taking care of us this whole time. Sure, some of the others weren't here until later - like Vivian, she was the last, wasn't she?

Dr. Kothari
Yes.

SCP-6314-W
Think of Vivian. You know she didn't have a good life before you brought her here. But she likes you, doesn't she? Do you understand the significance of that?

Dr. Kothari
What do you mean?

SCP-6314-W
There are only two beings in this whole world that Vivian likes. Sammy, and you. She likes Sammy because they were made that way, but her love for you was earned. And do you know how that happened?

Dr. Kothari
How?

SCP-6314-W
Because you were the best owner that she ever had. That any of us ever had. You care for us better than any zoo, pet shop, or aquarium could, or any other person ever has. And it's not just a matter of feeding and cleaning us. You care for us, but you also care about us. We're your friends. And you are ours. The years we've spent with you have been the best of our lives.

Dr. Kothari
[sniffs] Mine too. But I want more years.

SCP-6314-W
So do we, Sara. But we're needed elsewhere.

Dr. Kothari
[sighs] I know.

SCP-6314-W
For what it's worth, I'm sorry.

Dr. Kothari
I'm sorry too.

> RECORDING ENDED <

Addendum 6314-11

SCP-6314-Y reciting "Sailing to Byzantium" in its outdoor enclosure

SCP-6314-Y is a male Bos grunniens (domestic yak). Instance has perfectly memorized all written works of W. B. Yeats8 and all biographies of Yeats published before the year 2000.

As it is effectively the world's leading expert on W. B. Yeats, custody of SCP-6314-Y was offered to several museums and historical and artistic societies associated with Yeats. Based on the accommodations for the object offered by those organizations that were interested, Dr. Kothari selected the Yeats Society of Sligo to take custody of the instance. Logged below is the final conversation between Dr. Kothari and SCP-6314-Y.

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Video Log

> RECORDING STARTED <

Dr. Kothari enters SCP-6314-Y's indoor habitat.

Dr. Kothari
Yancy?

SCP-6314-Y
Good morning.

Dr. Kothari
Uh, hi.

SCP-6314-Y
What brings you in here?

Dr. Kothari
Well, I've got some good news and some bad news.

SCP-6314-Y
Let's have the good news first, then.

Dr. Kothari
I've found you a new home. You'll like this: the Yeats Society, in Sligo. Apparently you're pretty much the number one expert on Yeats, so they'll be happy to have you.

SCP-6314-Y
Aye, that sounds like the place for me. What's the bad news?

Dr. Kothari
Well, I…I guess that's the bad news too.

SCP-6314-Y
What's the matter?

Dr. Kothari
I'm just gonna miss you, is all. All of you.

SCP-6314-Y
And I'll miss you too, lass. But that's the nature of things, ain't it?

Dr. Kothari
What do you mean?

SCP-6314-Y
Well, like the man said:

SCP-6314-Y clears its throat, then speaks in the voice of W.B. Yeats.

SCP-6314-Y
Things fall apart. The center cannot hold

Dr. Kothari hangs her head.

Dr. Kothari
Yep. They sure [chokes up] do.

SCP-6314-Y
Lassie?

Dr. Kothari bursts into tears and sits heavily on a nearby rock.

SCP-6314-Y
Oh dear.

SCP-6314-Y approaches Dr. Kothari and nuzzles her with its snout. Dr. Kothari rubs SCP-6314-Y's neck.

SCP-6314-Y
That's alright. Just let it out.

Dr. Kothari
It's just - I'm - it's not fair!

SCP-6314-Y
I know, I know.

Dr. Kothari
They're taking you all away from me, and I'm never gonna see any of you again!

SCP-6314-Y
It's alright, Sara. We're moving on to where we're needed.

Dr. Kothari
But I need you, Yancy! Your family is my life. And now I have to give it all away.

SCP-6314-Y
Aw, that's sweet of you to say, but we're not that-

Dr. Kothari
Twelve years, Yancy. Twelve years. That's how much of my life I've dedicated to taking care of you all. You're my world. But now they're taking you away, and I don't even recognize the world anymore.

SCP-6314-Y
What do you mean?

Dr. Kothari
Everything's so…different. We're working with our enemies now. The Circus is out in the open, and people love it. There are Maxwellist churches on the streets. Hell, they fixed the Broken God, and everything was fine! I feel like…I know we were wrong. All this containment shit, it was never necessary. What am I supposed to do now? Everything I thought was wrong. The world feels like it's moving on without me. It's like you said, "things fall apart."

SCP-6314-Y
Well…

Dr. Kothari
What?

SCP-6314-Y
That quotation is sometimes taken out of context.

Dr. Kothari
Of The Second Coming? I've read that, I know-

SCP-6314-Y
No, not that. The context of Yeats's philosophy, the whole "gyre" thing.

Dr. Kothari
What about it? Everything starts at a point, then spirals outwards into ruin. "The center cannot hold."

SCP-6314-Y shakes its head

SCP-6314-Y
No, no, that's not how it works. Well, not completely. See, look.

SCP-6314-Y uses its hoof to draw a two-dimensional representation of a widening spiral, as viewed from the side.

SCP-6314-Y
This is a gyre.

Dr. Kothari
Right.

SCP-6314-Y
But so is this.

SCP-6314-Y draws another spiral, beginning at the end of the previous one but opening in the opposite direction so the two of them overlap.

Dr. Kothari
Okay?

SCP-6314-Y
Alright, so - [SCP-6314-Y taps its hoof at the edge of the gyre.] - we're here. Right at the end of this one gyre. But we're also at the beginning of the other one.

Dr. Kothari
What do you mean?

SCP-6314-Y
I mean, the spinning, the widening, it goes both ways. One gyre spins out into nothing, but another takes shape within it. And this one tightens while the other widens. So it's not just an endless spiral into ruin and despair. It's more of a-

Dr. Kothari
A cycle.

SCP-6314-Y
Yeah! Or a pendulum, or something. So yeah, this might be the end of the world. But it's also the beginning of one.

Dr. Kothari
[sighs] I know that, Yancy. The problem is that the new world is different. I'm not sure I want to live in it.

SCP-6314-Y
Well, you don't exactly have a choice.

Dr. Kothari places her face in her hands.

Dr. Kothari
[sighs] You're even less helpful than Wilhelm.

SCP-6314-Y
Wait, uh, that came out wrong. Just, just hold on.

Dr. Kothari
[peers over her hands] What?

SCP-6314-Y
Look, all I'm trying to say is, the world's not ending. it's just changing. Cuz that's the nature of things - to fall apart, yeah, but also to come back together. And, well, if everything else is changing, so can you.

Dr. Kothari lowers her hands and sits up.

Dr. Kothari
Yeah? And how am I supposed to do that? Quit the Foundation? Join the Circus? Hop over to the nearest church of Maxwell and get a freakin' computer implanted in my head? I don't even know what my job is for anymore! How can I protect normalcy when there is no normal?

SCP-6314-Y
Ah, that's not true. There's still a normal. Just a new one…one that, if what you've said to me is true, doesn't really need protecting.

Dr. Kothari appears confused.

Dr. Kothari
What are you saying?

SCP-6314-Y
What are you hearing? [SCP-6314-Y winks]

Dr. Kothari's eyes widen. She glances at her EyePod.

> RECORDING ENDED <

At this point, SCP-6314-Y struck Dr. Kothari's EyePod with its horn, destroying it. The object claims that it did so accidentally while shaking its head to dislodge a fly. It responded to all further inquiries with various vulgar quotes of W.B. Yeats.

Addendum 6314-12

The footage transcribed below was compiled from Site-66 security cameras and Researcher Carlson’s EyePod.

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Video Log

> RECORDING STARTED <

Dr. Kothari exits SCP-6314-Y’s habitat at the hallway. There is no one else present in the SCP-6314 unit, except for Researcher Carlson, who was working late in his office (located opposite Dr. Kothari’s, just inside the entrance to the 6314 unit). Due to the late hour, the hallway lights are on energy-saving mode; each light flickers on as Dr. Kothari passes under it, and turns off after she passes. She proceeds quickly from -Y’s habitat to the one shared by SCP-6314-S and -V.

Researcher Carlson does not seem to hear Dr. Kothari's movements; he is listening to music9 via his cranial implant and quietly singing along.

After several minutes, Dr. Kothari exits the habitat. The door to the habitat closes loudly behind her, and she startles at the sound. In his office, Researcher Carlson looks up from his computer screen. His EyePod is resting on a bookshelf behind him, looking out the doorway.

Researcher Carlson
Sara? Is that you?

Dr. Kothari does not reply. She hurries toward the exit and tries to open the door, stopping clearly in view of Researcher Carlson, but she drops her ID card.

Dr. Kothari
Shit!

Researcher Carlson
Uh, Sara?

Dr. Kothari’s grabs her ID and stands back up.

Dr. Kothari
Y-yes?

Researcher Carlson
What are you doing?

Dr. Kothari
Uh. Uh. I was just, uh…visiting Sammy and V-Vivian before I…before they…uh…

Dr. Kothari’s right sleeve moves briefly. She attempts to conceal it behind her back.

Researcher Carlson
Sara?

Dr. Kothari swallows nervously. She is visibly shaking.

Researcher Carlson begins to turn around, towards his EyePod, but stops.

Researcher Carlson
Are they okay?

Dr. Kothari
[Dr. Kothari nods quickly] Y-yes.

Researcher Carlson
Are you?

Dr. Kothari takes a deep breath, then nods once raises her chin.

Dr. Kothari
Yes.

Researcher Carlson
[resumes facing forward] Good. I'm glad. [deep breath] So this is good…night, then?

Dr. Kothari
Yes. [clears throat, softly] It is.

Researcher Carlson
[nods] Okay. Get some rest, Sara. You've earned it.

Dr. Kothari
[smiling faintly] Thank you.

Dr. Kothari quickly exits the 6314 wing and then the building altogether. She climbs into her personal vehicle and departs from the Site.

> RECORDING ENDED <

Researcher Carlson did not discover that SCP-6314-S and -V had been removed from their chambers until he arrived for work the following morning. Once he reported their absence, and that Dr. Kothari had not arrived at work, agents were dispatched to her place of residence to detain her and retrieve the instances. Dr. Kothari's apartment had been vacated the night before, with most valuables and personal effects removed, as well as Dr. Kothari's vehicle. The vehicle was later discovered in Portland, Oregon, near a known access point to Three Portlands. Due to the low value of, and little danger presented by, the missing instances and the estimated difficulty of recovery, no further efforts to retrieve them are planned at this time. Active efforts to capture Dr. Kothari have likewise been abandoned.

Footnotes

1. In addition to the instances described here, 30 similar animals associated with the letters of the Cyrillic alphabet have been discovered in predominantly Russophone countries. The Russian branch of the SCP Foundation supervised containment of Cyrillic instances until the fall of the Russian Federation during the Second War of the Flesh, at which point custody was transferred to the Department of Abnormal Threats to the Security Service of Ukraine. WonderCo representatives have confirmed that there were once plans to create Alliterative Animal series for multiple languages, but only the English and Russian sets were produced before post-Veil restructuring led to the project's cancellation. As the Cyrillic instances are already in GoI custody, the remainder of this document concerns only the English series.

2. Non-sentient biomechanical organisms reverse-engineered from the remains of SCP-131, programmed to follow and record on-duty Foundation personnel in order to improve record-keeping. EyePods visually resemble smaller (15 cm in height) instances of SCP-131 but are colored standard Foundation gray, and locomote via hovering instead of wheels. By the year 2025, all Foundation personnel level 1 and above were each assigned an EyePod.

3. A miniature version of a standard-sized board, colored purple and bearing the Dr. Wondertainment logo. This board was in SCP-6314-T's possession when it was contained.

4. Presumably, the billboard in question was displaying a recruitment advertisement for the 2030 Spacex/NASA Mars colonization mission. "Get your ass to Mars" was the advertising campaign's primary slogan, typically accompanied by a drawing of a donkey wearing a space helmet.

5. This statement has been flagged for potential antimemetic corruption.

6. This statement has been flagged for potential antimemetic corruption.

7. produced by SCP-646

8. including unpublished works, written correspondence, notes to self, grocery lists, and other minutiae

9. "Resistance" by Queensrÿche