Cars don't grow on trees, they grow from the ground. Like Toyomatoes. Avocandas. Zucchinissans. I'll stop…

SCP-7384: Automotive Agriculture

Word Count: 6.75k

Reading Time: 25 mins

Item №: SCP-7384
Level 4/7384

Object Class: Euclid
Classified

A vehicle cultivated through SCP-7384.

Assigned Site
Site Director
Research Head
Assigned Task Force

Site-48
Linda Lutz
Naomi Bradley
E-33 "Ford Pintos"

Darius McClain. (PoI-7384-1)

Special Containment Procedures: Research into SCP-7384, and subsequent negotiations with automakers regarding the practice, is to remain active under Mobile Task Force Epsilon-33 ("Ford Pintos"). Standard media protocols are to to conceal the SCP-7384 process, including all agricultural holdings practicing SCP-7384, from the civilian public. Vehicles produced through this method are permitted to be sold to civilians with their true origin remaining concealed.

Due to the events of September 5, 2022, Containment Zone 7384 is to be monitored through offsite means only.

Description: SCP-7384 is an agricultural process through which automobiles are cultivated. Vehicles produced through this method are otherwise physically mundane following maturity, and operate similarly to a non-anomalous equivalent. Research is currently underway regarding the exact mechanisms of SCP-7384.

Individuals participating in SCP-7384 operations are collectively designated Persons of Interest 7384, with numerical sub-designations issued chronologically by order of discovery. To prevent confusion, all Persons of Interest have been labeled by their given names within dialogue transcripts.

The first Person of Interest to be identified is an adult male named Darius McClain, designated PoI-7384-1. This individual is the farmer and landowner of an agricultural holding within Union County, Mississippi, USA, designated SCP-7384-A, that produces Toyota automobiles through the SCP-7384 method.

Addendum 01: On July 5, 2022, PoI-7384-1 made a social-media post offering an apprenticeship at SCP-7384-A.1 Foundation webcrawlers identified the information as potentially anomalous, and the phenomenon received its SCP designation.

Lead Researcher Naomi Bradley was dispatched for initial investigation.

Researcher Naomi Bradley.

Transcript 7384-1

Personnel Present: Researcher Naomi Bradley

Subject: Darius McClain (PoI-7384-1)

Location: SCP-7384-A

Date: July 6, 2022

<Begin Log>

Researcher Bradley enters SCP-7384-A in her Foundation-issue SUV. McClain is seated in front of their farmhouse.

She parks the vehicle to meet McClain.

Bradley: Mr. McClain?

McClain: That's me, ma'am. And call me "Dan".

Bradley: My name's Naomi, I saw your posts online and I'm interested in an apprenticeship with you.

McClain: Glad there's still city folk wantin' to work the fields. Let me give you a tour, show you what you'll be workin' with.

Bradley: Certainly.

McClain stands up and begins to walk towards the fields, with Researcher Bradley following.

Bradley: How long have you been farming automobiles, Dan?

McClain: Six years, though it feels like I've done this my whole life.

Bradley: And why have you chosen automobiles as your crop?

McClain: Well… I wanted to be a farmer like my old man, before he died and my uncle sold the family farm to move to Jackson. Got him back in the end, sold his liquor store to buy this place.

Bradley: Where does Toyota enter the-

McClain: I'm gettin' there, hang on. I tried growin' corn the first two years, but then I got an offer from Toyota to grow cars instead. I ain't take it at first, but then I saw the checks they were offerin'. Ten to thirty grand per car, all expenses paid for. By now they're phasin' out the subsidies, but it's still a tidy profit.

Bradley: That's good to hear.

McClain: So I flew out to California and went through this whole orientation process. Talkin' about how "Toyota" means "prosperous field" in Japanese or somethin' like that.

Bradley: Then you came back and grew cars for them for over half a decade?

McClain: Yes, ma'am.

The two approach a grassy field containing multiple rows of Toyota vehicles, implanted into the soil in rows five meters apart from each other.

McClain gestures toward the field.

McClain: One hundred and twenty Corollas, Camrys, Rav-4s, and Priuses. We'll start reapin' them next week, loadin' them onto trucks corporate sends me, and they'll go to happy customers.

The two begin to traverse the field. Researcher Bradley observes each buried vehicle as she walks by.

Bradley: Mister- um, Dan, how exactly do these cars take shape?

McClain: Just like growin' regular fruits and veggies, except you gotta plant them further apart than other crops.

McClain reaches into their pocket and pulls out a small bag. Its label reads "2024 Camrys".

McClain: This's where all the new Toyotas come from. A bag just like this, sent from Japan.

Researcher Bradley begins to reach for the bag.

Bradley: May I take a sample home with me?

McClain quickly closes the bag and positions it away from Researcher Bradley.

McClain: Nope. These're real expensive. Toyota'll give me twenty grand for each car, each bag has thirty seeds, so that's… uh…

Bradley: Six hundred thousand dollars a bag.

McClain: Exactly, so I ain't gon' be givin' them away.

Bradley: My apologies.

The two reach an irrigation ditch at the edge of the field. Another field of cars is visible across the ditch.

McClain takes a seat on a pile of large fertilizer bags.

McClain: Anyway, once we plant them, I'll put these giant sprinklers over them for waterin'. Over the winter the cars'll be covered in this giant cocoon-lookin' thing, but when spring comes around, it'll wither away and expose a fully grown car ripe for pickin'. Gotta harvest them quick, or they might start to rust.

Bradley: Come to think of it, how does the harvesting work exactly?

McClain: I use a tractor to pull them out the ground one by one, kinda like regular towin'. Thinkin' of switchin' to Kubota, my John Deere's been actin' up lately.

Bradley: And that's the yearly agricultural routine?

McClain: Yes ma'am, water four times a day, good soil, lots of nutrients. Sometimes Toyota'll send supplements I gotta mix in with the water.

Bradley: Could you elaborate on the bio-chemical process that happens within each plant?

McClain stares at Researcher Bradley.

Bradley: As in, how do the cars grow and mature, biologically?

McClain: That's for the boys in Japan to figure out, not me.

An individual, later identified as Michael Greenwood, steps out from the field across the ditch. They are holding a limp hose.

Greenwood: Dan, who're you talking to? Another 'pprentice?

McClain turns to face the individual.

McClain: Will you please just mind your business, Mike?

Greenwood: You're prolly bitching 'bout me to her, aren't ya?!

McClain: Why don'cha go back to your lawnmower garden? I'm busy right now.

Greenwood: Least I'm not the one sending trucks to terrorists overseas!

McClain: You know damn well I ain't- where you goin'?

Greenwood runs off.

Bradley: Mr. McClain, who was that?

McClain: Ah, that's Mike, the Honda farmer next door. Moved in about four years ago, he's been bitchin' to me ever since.

Bradley: There are other car farmers?

McClain: Yeah, you just met Mike, haven't ya?

They sigh as they stand up and pick up a large bag from the pile.

McClain: This area ain't got enough nutrients and moisture for the two of us to grow together. I've found myself havin' to truck in more and more fertilizer to make my harvests on time.

McClain empties the bag onto a barren patch of land. An assortment of metal bolts, nuts, and screws pour out on the ground.

McClain: It's gettin' harder to meet my "Toyota quota" every year.

Researcher Bradley stares at the mass of metallic pieces in the soil.

McClain: Honestly… no offense ma'am, but I was lookin' for someone a little younger to pass this farm down to. Want my apprentice to inherit this farm and start an ol' fashioned lineage, continue where my old man left off.

Bradley: You don't have children of you own?

McClain: Naw, me and my wife Jasmine, there're some… fertility issues. You ladies understand, right?

Bradley: Of course. With that being said, you're the perfect candidate to start a partnership with the Society of Crop Production.

McClain: Hmm?

Bradley: We're a co-op farming organization devoted to helping farmers manage and grow their operations.

McClain: Wait, this's why you're here? You want me to join some farmin' HOA?

Bradley: You can benefit massively with a partnership with-

McClain: Ma'am, as I've already said, I wanna pass down this place to someone who'll carry it on, like a son or daughter. Not so you could impose some sorta HOA on me.

Bradley: Sir, our organization can connect you with other farmers as part of a network, with-

McClain raises his palm towards Researcher Bradley.

McClain: I ain't kowtowin' to no HOA. I answer to my wife, God, Toyota, and no one else. I pay my taxes, ain't that enough?

Bradley: You're making a mistake.

McClain: No means no, ma'am. Need to find yourself some different sucker instead.

Researcher Bradley glances at Greenwood's farmland.

Bradley: Okay then. My offer remains open, Mr. McClain.

Researcher Bradley walks away as McClain shakes their head and turns back to their field.

<End Log>

Following the interview, the rival Honda agricultural holding was designated SCP-7384-B; its owner was designated PoI-7384-2.

An interview was conducted with PoI-7384-2 regarding their relationship with PoI-0000-1.

Michael Greenwood. (PoI-7384-2)

Transcript 7384-2

Personnel Present: Researcher Naomi Bradley

Subject: Michael Greenwood (PoI-7384-2)

Location: SCP-7384-B

Date: July 6, 2022

<Begin Log>

Researcher Bradley steps onto SCP-7384-B. It consists of a dirt field with Honda vehicles buried in the soil, laid out in a similar manner to SCP-7384-A. She walks through the farmland, observing the buried cars as she goes.

As Bradley approaches the irrigation ditch separating the two farms, she observes Greenwood standing next to a 2022 Honda Civic Type-R, washing it with a hose.

Bradley: Um… sir? Could I have a minute of your-

Greenwood turns off the hose and spins around to face Researcher Bradley.

Greenwood: Did the 'Yota farmer send you? What's he on 'bout this time?!

Bradley: No no no, we want to… learn more about you and your farming operation.

Greenwood: Can't, Honda'll drop me if I squeal 'bout the whole process to anyone else. Should be the same with the 'Yota farmer, maybe he's got some sorta privilege?

Bradley: How many car farmers are in the area? I didn't expect more than one.

Greenwood: I only know 'bout me and Dan.

Bradley: I'd assume, as colleagues and neighbors, you'd be on better terms with each other?

Greenwood: Look lady, he's just… mad 'bout some "not enough nutrients" bullshit, 'scuse my French. There's plenty of it to go 'round!

Bradley: Any other reasons?

Greenwood: I dunno, I'm just trying to make a living growing cars, and so is he! Can't he show a little respect 'n courtesy?

Bradley: Don't let him get to you, sir.

Silence.

Greenwood: Yanno what? He's got no right to complain 'bout the soil when his farm's bigger than mine! He's got like six hundred'n fifty cars while I only got ninety! If anyone's hogging the soil, it's him!

Researcher Bradley nods her head.

Greenwood: My mama's got scolee- scoliosis, can't afford surgery 'n her pain meds're getting more 'spensive every year. Can't just pack up 'n leave like Dan wants, my mama needs me to keep going!

Greenwood sighs.

Greenwood: Just wish Dan would understand. I get he was 'ere first, but where's his sympathy for the little guy?

Researcher Bradley takes a deep breath.

Bradley: Sir, I'd like to offer you a partnership with the Society of Crop Production; we're an agricultural group aligning ourselves with-

Greenwood: Wha- like a co-op?

Bradley: Basically. We've… worked with many car farms to secure larger contracts with their… respective manufacturers, and we can work with yours as well.

Greenwood: Wait wait, how'm I supposed to know you're actually legit?

Bradley: We've got a lot of success stories in our portfolio. Manufacturers like Honda have been… expanding their operations, and you wouldn't want to be left out, no?

Greenwood: Uh… I'd have to talk to my Honda honcho 'bout this.

Bradley: He hasn't discussed it with you yet?

Greenwood: Naw.

Bradley: Word about us doesn't spread very fast within large companies, and perhaps someone somewhere's getting a kickback from not telling people like you.

Greenwood: Ma'am, they're not General Motors. I trust Honda's management, they got that "kaizen" mindset in 'em. No backstabbing over there!

Bradley: No company's perfect.

Researcher Bradley leans in.

Bradley: Between me and you, McClain over there said "no" to our offer. It's time for you to take the lead.

Greenwood glances at McClain's farm across from the ditch.

Bradley: There's no fee to opt in. We'll make sure the majority of your growth earnings go in your pocket.

Researcher Bradley reaches her hand out.

Bradley: You could afford surgery for your sick mother, too. She'll be really proud of you.

Greenwood looks around, then shakes Researcher Bradley's hand.

Greenwood: I'll do it.

Bradley: Excellent.

Greenwood: Name's Mike, by the way. Mike Greenwood.

Bradley: I'll have a team come by and inspect your farm as part of our onboarding process, Mr. Greenwood.

Greenwood: Fine with me. Just… no free samples.

<End Log>

Following PoI-7384-2's ostensive agreement, Foundation CCTV cameras were installed within the area. Due to the close proximity of both operations, a five-kilometer radius area was established around the collective center of SCP-7384-A and SCP-7384-B, and was designated Containment Zone 7384. MTF Epsilon-33 was tasked with maintaining the containment area through soft travel restrictions.

PoI-7384-2's agreement allowed Epsilon-33 to analyse their SCP-7384 plants to determine a biological method of growth. However, due to the maturity of the instances, little information was obtained.

Notably, examination of the soil within SCP-7384-B indicated high levels of contamination with metal alloys such as steel and aluminum, synthetic rubber, crystalized glass, and polyurethane compounds.

Addendum 02: Foundation agents have initiated research into SCP-7384 operations within automakers Toyota and Honda. Site-48's Information Division is responsible for using gathered research to fabricate success stories of SCP-7384 holdings to add credibility to Foundation attempts at placating PoI-7384-2.

Regardless, both Persons of Interest expressed enhanced aggression towards each other following initial Foundation contact.

Transcript 7384-3

Personnel Present: MTF Epsilon-33 Agents

Subjects: Darius McClain (PoI-7384-1), Michael Greenwood (PoI-7384-2)

Location: Containment Zone 7384

Date: July 9, 2022

<Begin Log>

Two Epsilon-33 agents observe Greenwood watering a 2023 Acura Integra coupe.

McClain walks up to their land boundary along the ditch, and waves at Greenwood.

McClain: What was that about not lettin' in visitors, Mike?

Greenwood: Huh? No, these're from the Society ah… of Crop…

Epsilon-33 Agent: Society of Crop Production.

McClain: Hey hey, wait a minute. You signed up with that farmin' HOA?

Greenwood: Yep! Wish you'd signed up too, huh?

McClain: What're you doin', kowtowin' to an HOA? You ain't value your independence?

Greenwood: It's not that deep, Dan. Just allying myself with likeminded folks to get an edge in this 'conomy.

McClain: Mike, you're not respectin' your liberty by lettin' this HOA on your property.

Greenwood: 'Kay then, have fun falling behind! The Society'll get me bigger and bigger contracts with Honda. More money in my pocket, might get my kitchen remodeled, buy a new tractor too!

McClain: Them HOA fees're gon' take everything you earn. Nothin' left for you, a trap of tyranny.

Greenwood: Ooooh, tyranny! Gonna start wearing tinfoil hats 'cause I've joined a co-op farming group? Yapping 'bout all that nonsense for nothing!

McClain: It's not just nothin', Mike. I thought better of you. Guess I was wrong.

McClain turns around towards their farm.

McClain: Go ahead and hang out with your HOA. But you ain't gon' cry to me when they leave you high and dry.

McClain walks off as Greenwood turns towards the Epsilon-33 agents.

Greenwood: Anyway, what were y'all asking me 'bout?

Epsilon-33 Agent: How much water does each vehicle consume daily? Measure it out for us in liters.

Greenwood: What're "liters"?

<End Log>

On July 18, 2022, PoI-7384-1 began to harvest their SCP-7384 vehicles for export. Over the course of the week, multiple Toyota-contracted transport trucks arrived to pick up the harvested vehicles. MTF Epsilon-33 personnel observed the process, no abnormalities were otherwise reported.

Following their departure from Containment Zone 7384, a number of transport trucks were detained by Epsilon-33 and their drivers interviewed.2 All drivers refused to disclose information regarding their role within SCP-7384-related operations.

During detainment, the SCP-7384 vehicles were inspected by Epsilon-33. No physical abnormalities were discovered compared to non-anomalous equivalents. Approval was granted by senior Foundation personnel to allow the SCP-7384 vehicles to be sold to civilians.3 The vehicles were reloaded on the trucks, and their drivers were allowed to proceed.

Howard Browning. (PoI-7384-3)

Addendum 03: Investigation into automakers suspected of practicing SCP-7384 operations revealed that many such agricultural holdings exist within the United States and Canada, supplementing existing traditional manufacturing plants.

Research into SCP-7384 is hindered by automakers' classification of many relevant documents, due to the tight competition among them. SCP-7384 agriculturalists were therefore instructed to keep their operations secret from the public.

For ease of containment, Lead Researcher Bradley enacted to relocate SCP-7384 operations to Containment Zone 7384, expanding the zone as necessary to accommodate new arrivals. Foundation agents been dispatched to locate uncontained SCP-7384 holdings and perform standard coercion methods to relocate them to Containment Zone 7384.

Currently, only one SCP-7384 participant has been relocated successfully. A Nissan cultivator named Howard Browning, designated PoI-7384-3, accepted an offer from the Foundation to relocate operations to SCP-7384-C, an area of land adjacent to SCP-7384-B. A support package was established to assist them during and after the relocation.

Transcript 7384-4

Personnel Present: Researcher Naomi Bradley

Subject: Howard Browning (PoI-7384-3)

Location: SCP-7384-C

Date: August 25, 2022

<Begin Log>

An SCP-7384 seedling.

Researcher Bradley is observing Browning, who is holding a watering can and pouring it on a seedling of a 2023 Nissan Sentra.

Bradley: So how's the land, Mr. Browning?

Browning: It's… not as good as in Tennessee.

Bradley: And what makes you say that?

Browning: I can feel it in the soil, it's… dry, a lot dryer than it should be.

Bradley: Can't you still make it work?

Browning: Yeah, but I'll need a lot more steel, water, nutrients in general to get these cars to mature in time…

Bradley: You have everything you need to succeed, Mr. Browning.

McClain approaches the two from the roadside.

McClain: Hol' up, what's this? Are you-

Browning: Oh, hi there. What's your name?

McClain: Dan, I grow cars just up the road. You?

Browning: You can call me Howard. It's nice to meet a fellow car farmer.

McClain sighs and rubs their face.

McClain: Another auto farm? I already got one neighborin' me, now one more?

Browning sets their watering can down.

Browning: There's no need to be rude, neighbor. Surely we can get along fine.

McClain: What kinda cars you growin' here, anyway?

Browning: Oh, just Nissan Sentras.

McClain: Nissan?

Greenwood walks up to the group. Researcher Bradley waves to them.

Bradley: Mr. Greenwood, meet your new neighbor!

McClain: Mike, this Nissan farmer's settin' up shop here!

Greenwood: Aw, what?!

Browning: Hey! I have a right to use my land as I wish.

Bradley: Besides, three Japanese car brands in the same area, I'd say-

Greenwood: They're not Japanese anymore, they're French!

Browning crosses their arms.

Browning: Sirs, I don't know what your problems are, maybe your brands don't pay you all that well, but I've grown Nissans for five years. I'm sticking with them.

McClain snorts.

McClain: Enjoy your squeakin' transmissions, then.

Bradley: If you two are so opposed to a Nissan farm, the Society could arrange for him to switch to another brand, such as Hyundai.

McClain and Greenwood: HUN-DYE?

The two throw up their hands and stomp their feet as they walk away.

Researcher Bradley turns towards Browning.

Bradley: Don't listen to them, Mr. Browning. I'm sure you'll be able to succeed with your new land.

Browning sighs as they pick up their watering can to water another seedling.

<End Log>

The following conversation was filmed through Foundation CCTV cameras installed in utility poles within Containment Zone 7384.

Transcript 7384-5

Personnel Present: N/A

Subjects: Darius McClain (PoI-7384-1), Michael Greenwood, (PoI-7384-2), Howard Browning (PoI-7384-3)

Location: Containment Zone 7384

Date: August 26, 2022

<Begin Log>

McClain and Greenwood are standing in the roadway, where the irrigation ditch between their farms reaches the road.

Greenwood: This "Society" promised me I'd get more cars to plant, 'stead they moved in someone else!

McClain: I told ya that HOA's gon' betray ya sooner or later.

Greenwood: Dan, I never would'a signed with them, they never would'a showed up if you didn't squeal 'bout what we were doing.

McClain: I never thought someone like them would show up. I just wanna heir to my farm… someone to pass it down to.

Greenwood: Course, it just had to be the 'Ciety!

McClain: Mike, I said no. You should'a said no, too.

Greenwood: They lied to me! If I knew this woulda happened, I woulda never signed anything!

Greenwood sighs.

Greenwood: I was gonna pay for my mama's back surgery with the extra money.

McClain: That's sweet of you, Mike.

Greenwood: And I told that 'Ciety lady 'bout my mama's injuries, yet she still went and screwed me over!

McClain: She screwed both of us over.

Browning approaches the two from down the road.

Browning: Excuse me, sirs… maybe we got off on the wrong foot. Didn't get the best first impression of each other, I'd prefer it if we got along.

McClain and Greenwood exchange glances.

Greenwood: Seriously, why Nissan? Coulda went Subaru, Mazda, even Mitsu-fucking-bishi, but Nissan?

Browning: That's the only choice I got in Tennessee.

McClain: Course you're from Tenn. Second worst education in America.

Browning: Thank God for Mississippi…

Greenwood: 'Ey! If you feel that way 'bout our state, then why'd ya move here?

Browning: Well, my old farm got eminent domained by a cement company,4 and I got an offer to move here from the Society of Crop Production.

Greenwood: Shit, eminent domain? Fuck…

McClain: That's wrong what they did to ya, guv'mint overreach always trumpin' the little guy.

Browning: I'm trying to make it work, but this land isn't as arable as I thought it'd be…

McClain: How much didja pay for it, anyway?

Browning: After subsidies, four grand per acre.

Silence.

McClain: Four grand…

Greenwood: Hell, I only paid two grand an acre!

McClain: You got ripped off, boy. I only paid twelve hundred an acre when I first started.

Browning rubs their face and groans.

McClain: Hope you're plantin' GT-Rs, Infinitis, somethin' real pricey.

Browning: No, I'm just a Sentra farmer. I used to farm Leafs too, but I didn't get any Leaf seedings after I moved out here.

McClain: You ain't gon' make money farmin' only Sentras when your land's four grand an acre.

Browning groans and covers their face.

Browning: My family's supposed to move out here soon. They'll be mad as hell when they find out what I've gotten myself into, they've uprooted everything for me.

Silence.

Greenwood: Yanno, why'd the 'Ciety move him across states, just to put him next to us? There's not enough nutrition in the soil to sustain three car farms. Wouldn't the 'Ciety know that, too?

McClain: Wait, ain't you tellin' me before that we've got enough room for the both of us?

Greenwood: Well, now there's three of us.

The three sigh.

Browning: If I may ask, how long have you two been at each others' throats like this?

Greenwood: Years and years!

McClain: What- no, it ain't been that long and you know it, Mike.

Browning: Because it's odd to me how you two can't seem to coexist as neighbors, as coworkers.

Greenwood points at McClain.

Greenwood: Dan started it! I just wanna grow in peace, but he insists that-

McClain: You've been nothin' but a thorn in my side ever since you showed up, Mike. Don't deny it.

Greenwood: You got us into this mess, Dan! You invited them 'ere! You started this!

Browning: Sirs, sirs! Wouldn't it be better to save your energy to fight bigger adversaries, like the Society? Not wasting it on bickering with each other. That Society lady's probably laughing at us argue with each other while she takes more and more of our money!

McClain and Greenwood pause for a moment, then nod their heads.

Browning: We farmers need to stick together. None of this arguing about each other, at the end of the day, we're men who wanna make an honest day's living tilling the earth and providing for our families, yes?

McClain: Mmm-hmm.

Greenwood: Can't argue 'gainst that!

Browning: So I say we go to the news and expose this Society for who they really are. How they've been mishandling us and tricking us.

Greenwood: Wait, wait, we're not allowed to talk 'bout car farming.

Greenwood points to McClain.

Greenwood: He thought otherwise, that's why we're in this mess in the first place!

McClain: Mike, you're the one who signed up with that HOA.

Browning: As I've said, we share an adversary, right? We should at least talk to our brands, they won't be happy about any potential sabotage. Perhaps threaten the Society that we'll go public, too.

Greenwood: That's fine with me. Shake on it?

The three exchange handshakes.

McClain: For a Nissan farmer, you've got ya head screwed in tight.

Browning: It's that Tennessee education.

<End Log>

The three SCP-7384 farmers continued to complain to Foundation personnel regarding the arrangement, having notified their respective automakers. Due to the potential loss of knowledge regarding the SCP-7384 process, amnestic administration was temporarily deferred.

Addendum 04: Representatives from automakers Toyota, Honda, and Nissan have expressed disapproval of Foundation efforts to consolidate SCP-7384 operations within Containment Zone 7384. These disagreements have further hindered SCP-7384 research, as the automakers refused to cooperate with Foundation front organizations.

As a result, a joint conference has been approved between the PoI-7384 agriculturalists within Containment Zone 7384, the Foundation, and representatives from the automakers.

The meeting location.

Transcript 7384-6

Personnel Present: Researcher Naomi Bradley

Subjects:

Darius McClain (PoI-7384-1)

Michael Greenwood (PoI-7384-2)

Howard Browning (PoI-7384-3)

Toyota Representative Tetsuo Koromo

Honda Representative Masaki Yamatani

Nissan Representative Legault Canton

Location: Containment Zone 7384

Date: September 5, 2022

<Begin Log>

Researcher Bradley and the SCP-7384 farmers are seated around a table within the meeting tent. Three speakerphones have been placed on the table.

Bradley: Now, I understand that you three have some disagreements regarding your partnership with the Society of Crop Production, and that's what we're here to discuss. I request that we do so in a civil manner.

The three SCP-7384 farmers nod their heads.

Bradley: I've contacted your respective automakers to listen in on our conversation, to-

McClain: Thank the Lord!

Greenwood: They're gonna give you an earful!

Browning smiles and nods their head.

The speakerphones on the desk begin to beep.

Bradley: Oh, that's them!

Researcher Bradley presses the answer key on each phone, one by one.

Canton: Hello? Hello, can you hear me?

Bradley: Yes, sir. Please introduce yourselves.

Canton: I'm Legault Canton with Nissan Motors.

Koromo: Koromo Tetsuo with Toyota.

Yamatani: Yamatani, Honda.

Bradley: Good. I'm Naomi Bradley with the Society of Crop Production, and three of your farming associates: McClain, Greenwood, and Browning.

Researcher Bradley turns to the farmers.

Bradley: Go on, say hi!

McClain: Konnichiwa, Mr. Koromo.

Greenwood: Yamatani-san, hello there!

Browning: Good morning, Mr. Canton.

Bradley: Alright, first thing on the agenda-

Koromo: Ms. Naomi, why exactly do you wish to relocate our American operations to one location in Missi- Missmiss-

Canton: Mississippi.

Koromo: Thank you. Who are you as an agriculture "Society" to demand such a thing?

Bradley: Sir, we believe it is best for the intricacies of the American auto market to locate manufacturing plants in one single area, rather than-

Yamatani: But you are a farming society, yes? You are not an auto manufacturer.

Koromo: Again, who are you to tell us where to grow our products?

Bradley: If you'd let me speak, our analysis of the soil composition of your botanical operations suggests a high amount of metallic pollution. As a Society dedicated to preserving America's farmland, we believe it's best to contain pollution in one specific area.

Yamatani: You are not observing the social, economic, and political aspect. Our operations are spread out across America so we can employ many different types of people, and ensure that no single disaster can disable all of our manufacturing.

Canton: Plus, we're already placing farms in areas that aren't fit to grow anything else. Mr. Browning's farm used to be a steel mill that got demolished, it was already polluted.

Researcher Bradley takes a deep breath as she rubs her face.

Bradley: As we've said, the Society prefers to keep ground pollution to a minimum. Locating it all in one place is more manageable than-

Koromo: Our new method is already more energy-efficient than our other manufacturing practices. We have saved millions of dollars by sending lithium waste to these operations for the growth of hybrid powertrains. Otherwise, it would have gone to waste. That is why it is called "waste".

Yamatani: You have attempted to interfere with our operations without understanding of what we are doing. This operation is done with environmental concern in mind, so it should not concern you.

Bradley: We operate under the concern of all of America's agriculture, organic or not. Everything we have done is perfectly legal.

Koromo: That does not give you the right to tell us how to operate our facilities. Once again, who are you to tell us how to conduct business? Answer my question!

Silence.

Canton: If I may interject, our board of investors at Nissan has been clamoring all week about this as well. They fear huge productivity declines and lost revenue, which goes against your "production" message, does it not?

Bradley: We estimate no loss of productivity through our plan.

Canton: But we do. Do the voices of our shareholders not matter to you?

Bradley: We'll keep your investors in mind, and yes, we do value their goals and concerns.

Koromo: That does not answer our question of why you believe you have the authority over us to relocate our operations!

Yamatani: You have entangled us in useless bureaucracy and hostility through your narrow and ignorant view of our industry, and our logistics.

Silence.

Bradley: Mr. Koromo, Mr. Yamatani, Mr. Canton. The Society of Crop Productivity remains committed to increasing yields and efficiency every year, while minimizing waste and pollution. This has not changed, nor will it ever change.

Researcher Bradley takes a deep breath.

Bradley: While our intentions were to lower your operating costs, lower pollution and save money, it is clear to us that there was a considerable disagreement and disenfranchisement on how to achieve this.

She takes another breath.

Bradley: We will reconsider our consolidation plan regarding your auto farms.

Yamatani: From now on, you will not interfere with our botanical operations?

Bradley: To clarify, we'll no longer plan to engage in any un-permissioned relocations of such facilities.

The automaker representatives sigh in unison.

Canton: That's all we needed, for your group to leave us alone. We've all been hitting our emissions targets, we don't cheat like Volkswagen does, why interfere with us?

Bradley: To my knowledge, Volkswagen's not growing cars out of the ground.

Koromo: Now you will respect our industry for what it is. I recommend you resign with grace, and allow a more qualified individual to take your place to ensure such a calamity will never happen again.

Bradley: I will make note of that comment, thank you.

The three SCP-7384 farmers smile and nod their heads.

Greenwood: We did it!

Browning: Ha ha ha!

Researcher Bradley glances at McClain, and scoots Koromo's speakerphone towards them.

McClain: Mr. Koromo! Arigato-

Koromo: McClain, your contract has been terminated!

McClain gasps.

McClain: Wha- wait, hol' on sir, I-

Koromo: You have revealed our operations to outsiders, violating our non-disclosure agreement!

McClain: But sir, I just wanted an apprentice, continue a family legacy!

Koromo: You are to return all Toyota botany products to our office in Aichi Prefecture before the end of the month, or we will pursue further legal action. Goodbye.

Koromo hangs up. McClain groans and puts their head on the table.

Researcher Bradley averts her gaze towards Greenwood, and scoots Yamatani's speakerphone towards them.

Yamatani: Greenwood? Greenwood?

Greenwood: Yes, Yamatani-san? Thank you for-

Yamatani: Why did you involve yourself with this "Society" organization?

Greenwood: Oh, um… they showed up one day after my-

Yamatani: You have neglected to prevent their intrusion.

Greenwood: Yamatani-san, I didn't think it'd turn out like this! Didn't think this Society'll move in more car farms.

Yamatani: My team has been hit with many calls from outsiders asking about the Honda Botanical Program. You have allowed this to happen!

Greenwood: But- but Yamatani-san, it was the 'Yota farmer 'cross the street, he let 'em in!

Yamatani: And you teamed up with them when he did not.

Greenwood: Yamatani-san, I just wanted to expand my business, grow more cars for you!

Yamatani: Your contract will not be renewed. We will accept your current harvest, but you will not be in partnership with us again. Goodbye.

Yamatani hangs up. Greenwood puts their head in their hands.

Canton: Mr. Browning? I have some news for you as well.

Researcher Bradley nudges Canton's speakerphone towards Browning.

Browning: Uh… what'd that be, Mr. Canton?

Canton: We've done an audit into your farm's relocation, and we couldn't find any evidence it was approved.

Browning: Wait, what? But I-

Canton: I'm not finished. Due to this unauthorized relocation, we will not continue doing business with you after your current crops are harvested.

Browning: But Mr. Canton, my old farm got eminent domained! And the Society was supposed to take care of all the paperwork.

Canton: Well, we couldn't find any of this "paperwork".

Browning: Mr. Canton, the Society moved me here! I was… coerced into it! They said they worked with you directly and everything!

Canton: We'll accept any remaining autos you harvest next year, but after that, we're going our separate ways.

Browning: Mr. Canton, wait! I- I- I'd like to file a dispute.

Canton: Perhaps you should ask this "Society" of yours to find you another contract. Good luck with your last harvest, Mr. Browning.

Canton hangs up. Browning turns towards Researcher Bradley.

Bradley: I ensure you that the Society has done everything on our end to communicate your relocation with Nissan Corporate.

Browning: That doesn't matter anymore! I've lost everything! We've lost everything!

Bradley: The Society is more than willing to help you find alternative crops for you to-

McClain: You cost us our jobs! Our paychecks! Our livelihoods!

Greenwood: Really, who the fuck didja think you were, tryna move in more farms?

Bradley: If you'd let me speak, let me remind you that you've agreed to supervision from the Society, and-

McClain: I ain't agree to any of this!

Bradley: There's no need for such hostility. The Society will do our best to locate new agricultural contracts for you to accept. This is not the setback you're all making it out to be.

Greenwood: Yes, it fucking is! My mama's gonna get sicker 'cause of you!

Researcher Bradley gathers the speakerphones off the table and backs away towards the meeting room exit.

Bradley: We'll continue tomorrow. I'll allow you three to calm down and assess the situation.

Researcher Bradley runs out of the meeting room.

Browning: Where're you running off to, you bitch?! What about my family?

McClain begins to cry.

McClain: How'm I gon' tell Jasmine about this? She'll be horrified about losin' the farm.

Greenwood: I already scheduled my mama's surgery…

<End Log>

Addendum 05: Due to the planned cessation of SCP-7384 operations within Containment Zone 7384, Foundation attention has been directed to SCP-7384 locations outside the zone for standard monitoring.

Amnesticization of all three Persons of Interest is planned following the complete cessation of operations within Containment Zone 7384. The group was recorded discussing Foundation operations following the loss of their contracts with the automakers.

Transcript 7384-7

Personnel Present: N/A

Subjects: Darius McClain (PoI-7384-1), Michael Greenwood (PoI-7384-2), Howard Browning (PoI-7384-3)

Location: Containment Zone 7384

Date: September 7, 2022

<Begin Log>

McClain is on their farmland, uprooting their Toyota seeds and putting them in a bucket. Across the street, Greenwood drives the last of their Honda vehicles onto a transport truck.

The truck drives away with Greenwood's harvest. They observe their barren farmland, then turns towards McClain's farm. They cup their hands around their mouth.

Greenwood: DAN! Dan, you need help?

McClain looks up and cups their hands around their mouth.

McClain: If you wanna!

Greenwood nods their head and walks along the farmland towards McClain, crossing over the ditch. When the two meet, they begin uprooting the Toyota seedings together.

Greenwood: How's your wife taking the news?

McClain: I, uh… I ain't told Jasmine yet. How about your mother?

Greenwood: Haven't told 'er, neither…

The two sigh.

Greenwood: Never grown anything else but Hondas. Regular food'll be new to me.

McClain: Regular food ain't gon' grow in this kinda soil. Might have'ta sell the farm and move back to Jackson.

Greenwood: Who's gonna buy our farms? Honda had me pour lotsa chemicals in the ground, and I don't feel like lying to people.

McClain: Maybe another auto brand'll come along and buy in. Or maybe the guvmint's gon' deem my farm a Superfund site and kick me out anyway.

Greenwood: Maybe we could talk to the 'Ciety 'bout getting us another contract-

McClain: Mike, fuck that HOA. We're goin' our own way from now on. No more kowtowin' to foreign companies. We're growin' and sellin' our own crops.

Greenwood: If we find another place to farm, that is.

The two prune the earth in silence.

McClain: Mike?

Greenwood: Yeah, Dan?

McClain: Sorry about bringin' that HOA bitch to our farms. Ain't your fault I've got loose lips.

Greenwood: It's not your fault I joined 'em, sucked up to 'em. Let 'em cost us everything.

McClain: I just wanna boy I can raise as an apprentice. Have myself a family farm like my old man had.

Greenwood: I started farming after getting laid off from my foundry job 'cause they moved everything to China. Maybe the Japanese're gonna move their stuff to China, too.

McClain: Got myself caught up in all their "kaizen" talk, but in the end, they're all the same.

Greenwood: Yep!

The two uproot and gather the last of the crops. They carry the buckets to the roadside.

Greenwood: Postage to Japan's gonna be 'spensive with this kinda weight.

McClain: Damnit, haven't thought'a that. One last insult to injury.

They set the buckets in front of McClain's farmhouse.

McClain: You wanna check on the Nissan guy?

Greenwood: Howard? Sure.

The two walk down the roadway towards Browning's location.

Browning is watering their seedlings with a watering can. The other two approach him from the road.

Greenwood: How's it going, Howard?

McClain: You need some help with your crops?

Browning: If you wish. I've got extra watering cans in my shed over there, everything to my right still needs water.

McClain and Greenwood nod, and walk towards the shed to retrieve the watering cans.

Following the completion of their irrigation, the three meet at the shed again. The sun is setting.

Browning: Thanks for helping me out, Mr… Mike?

McClain: No, I'm Dan. He's Mike.

McClain points at Greenwood, as Browning gestures towards their farmhouse.

Browning: Dan, Mike, why don't we have dinner together at my place? My family's finally moved in from Tennessee.

Greenwood: I don't see why not.

McClain: Can my wife come over? She's baked casserole for tonight.

Greenwood: And my ma, too. She needs the company.

Browning: Of course!

McClain: Oh, and uh… Howard, I'm sorry about startin' out on bad terms.

Greenwood: Again, we should'a stuck together from the start.

Browning: Thanks for the apology, boys. I appreciate it. What matters now is how we move forward. I'm thinking we could share a co-op space if you need to downsize.

Greenwood: S'alright with me.

The three begin to walk towards Browning's farmhouse.

McClain: You Tennessee fellas ain't that bad after all.

<End Log>

Footnotes

1. The account was later deleted, and their IP address was blacklisted from all social media sites.

2. Due to the risk of amnestics affecting their navigation abilities, Epsilon-33 performed their duties under the guise of an investigation regarding a hit-and-run incident in the area.

3. The lack of available containment capacity at nearby Foundation facilities was also considered.

4. PoI-7384-3's former agricultural location was claimed by Foundation front company Smarduch Concrete Products.