Warning: The Following SCP Has Been Classified a Tricky SCP

Personnel are warned that it will try to get your tongue in trouble.

Caution is advised.

Item #: SCP-543-J

Object Class: Grinchlike Constantinople

Special Containment Procedures: All SCP-543-J specimens currently known to The Foundation are to be contained within a corked glass bottle, which is to be kept in a secured containment chamber located at Site-123. The specimens have shown no desire to escape so long as their combat is uninterrupted.

Description: SCP-543-J designates members of the species Nicrophorus seussical (commonly referred to as "Tweetle Beetles"). For yet unknown reasons, when two or more specimens are brought into contact, all specimens in the immediate area will disperse into two smaller, similarly numbered "teams" and engage in combat, utilizing properties of the setting around them or any weaponry at their disposal in an attempt to claim a strategic advantage over the opposing team. Specimens have shown to be invulnerable to damage, and combat only ceases when all Tweetle Beetle specimens are forcibly removed from the event and separated.

Tweetle Beetle combat often results in large-scale collateral damage if allowed to occur in an uncontained environment. When Tweetle Beetles fight outside of containment, it's designated an XK-Tweetle-Beetle-Battle-Breaching-Bottle Situation.

In the event of an XK-Tweetle-Beetle-Battle-Breaching-Bottle Situation, Mobile Task Force Epsilon-11 ("Nine-Tailed Fox in Socks") will be deployed to recontain all specimens, while Mobile Task Force Gamma-5 ("Red Herring Blue Herring") will lead efforts to suppress public knowledge of the creatures and cover up any collateral damage with false claims. Protocol Green Eggs and Hamnestics may be enacted to suppress wide-spread knowledge of SCP-543-J should an information breach occur.

Experiment Log 543-Sierra-Sigma-J

Experiment-543-J-01

Test Supervisor: Dr S████

Experiment Parameters: An attempt to contain the event previously designated Tweetle-Beetle-Battle-Beta-23. MTF Epsilon-11 successfully introduced all SCP-543-J specimens into the containment deemed most appropriate, a glass bottle.

Results: Upon containment in the bottle the Tweetle Beetles kept on battling but the bottle wasn't breaking and containment was not breached. The bottle wasn't brittle and the battle didn't break it so the beetles and their battles in the bottle we will keep.

Event redesignated: Tweetle-Beetle-Bottle-Battle-Beta-66

Experiment-543-J-02

Test Supervisor: Dr S████

Experiment Parameters: 4 metric cups of water were introduced into the containment to attempt to subdue the specimens.

Results: The Tweetle Beetles battled in the puddle in the bottle but were bitter that the litre didn't bring the other beetles down. The puddle in the bottle brought the battle to a break when the Tweetle Beetle leaders formed a huddle with their teams and the Tweetle Beetle battlers planned for battling in the lake.

Event redesignated: Tweetle-Beetle-Puddle-Bottle-Battle-Huddle-Beta-66

Experiment-543-J-03

Test Supervisor: Dr S████

Experiment Parameters: The Tweetle Beetle battle contained within the puddle bottle was exposed to a pair of ping pong paddles.

Results: Upon exposure of the paddles to the Tweetle Beetle battle the beetles in the bottle were in the middle of a muddle because the beetles they were battling caused them trouble with their paddling. The beaten beetles in the puddle had no rebuttal to the muddle.

Event redesignated: Tweetle-Beetle-Puddle-Bottle-Paddle-Battle-Muddle-Beta-66

Experiment-543-J-04

Test Supervisor: Dr S████

Experiment Parameters: The puddle bottle full of beetles was introduced to a member of the species Canis lupus familiaris, breed poodle, and observed for any effect. The test subject was, at the time of testing, consuming and ingesting noodles.

Results: When the Tweetle Beetles fought their battle with their paddles in the puddle with the puddle in the bottle and the bottle on a poodle and the poodle eating noodles, the Tweetle Beetle paddlers and the beetles they were beating kept the beetle battle going and the litre puddle flowing. The poodle eating noodles with the bottle on its back didn't seem bewildered by the beetle's big attack. The branding of the noodles being eaten by the poodle as the Tweetle Beetles battled in the bottle on its back did not get noted down because the branding of the noodles being eaten by the poodle during testing was redacted.

Event redesignated: Tweetle-Beetle-Poodle-Paddle-Bottle-Puddle-Muddle-Battle-Beta-66