Alex Thorley Gets Away With It — syuzhet

SCP-8195.

Item #: SCP-8195

Special Containment Procedures: N/A

Description: SCP-8195 is an adult African Elephant. It began following Alex Thorley at some point in time.

TRANSCRIPT

We are at a coffee shop. It's early in the morning.

Thorley: Hi, can I get a… um, a small matcha latte, please?

Barista: Sure!

Thorley: And can you put oat-milk in it?

Barista: You want an oat-meal with that?

Thorley: No.

Thorley: No, I said— oat-milk.

Barista: Haha, my bad. A small matcha with oat-milk and…

Thorley rubs their hands.

Barista: Hey, do I know you?

Thorley: What?

Barista: Sorry, I mean… I've seen you before.

Barista: You're the guy from "Department of Unreality", right?

Barista looks at the camera.

Barista: Alex Thorley?

Thorley: Oh, yeah.

Pause.

Thorley: That's me…

Barista: No way! My wife and I read the last thing you were in.

Barista: The one with the robot or something? And and when you refresh the page, the experiment logs change?

Thorley: That uh

Barista: That was so cool. And seeing you in person is, like, unreal.

Barista: Haha.

Thorley: Yeah, haha…

SCP-8195: Address me.

Thorley looks at the camera.

Barista: You're awesome, man. Really.

Thorley: Yep.

Pause.

Barista: Ah, sorry, don't wanna take up too much of your time.

Barista: Is that everything?

Thorley: No, uh, actually, can I get one of those?

Thorley points at the glass display. There are breads and pastries inside.

Barista: Oh, you want

Barista grins.

Barista: You want

Barista: the bagel?

Thorley: No, I

Thorley:

Thorley: the cheese-cake

Barista: Oh, sorry, haha. Not the bagel, then, huh?

Thorley: No…

Barista: Haha, alright. So a matcha with oat-milk and one cheese-cake?

Thorley: Yeah.

Barista: And what about your friend here? Anything for them?

Barista looks at SCP-8195.

Thorley: Um.

Thorley: No.

Barista: Cool. That'll be

Alex Thorley left the coffee shop at 8 AM.

The elephant later reclassified itself as Neutralized.