Item#: SCP-6497

Containment Class: keter

Secondary Class: none

Disruption Class: ekhi

Risk Class: caution

Special Containment Procedures: Attempting to intercept the transmissions affiliated with SCP-6497 has been deemed ineffective. Containment efforts are instead to be focused in suppressing the chances of exposure in the general populace.

Web traffic and common medical records in the country of The United States of America are to be monitored for evidence of SCP-6497 activity. Exposed individuals are to be apprehended and amnesticized regardless of the level of exposure to the anomaly. Additionally, should the affected individual have been physically modified by a CUSTOMER-Event, these changes are to be catalogued.

Discovered instances of SCP-6497-1 are to be recovered and stored in their respective storage folder at Site-76.

An information campaign informing the general populace of the dangers of signing contracts which seem vague in nature is currently ongoing.

Description: SCP-6497 is the designation given to a currently ongoing series of commercials which aim to familiarize affected individuals to an anomalous service consistently referred to as "Dr. Wink's Fantabulous Service: Be The Better You!".

Though these manifestations have been determined to be rare, estimated to appear yearly in 0.7% of American households on average1, instances of SCP-6497 have been encountered in most American states, appearing in the television feed of individual households instead of the general audience.

The exact details of SCP-6497 vary between each time an instance of SCP-6497 is aired, the only consistent traits between them being the following:

An brief introduction to the service by a masculine voice

A brightly colored, fast paced presentation

A phone number which has been the same in each instance so far

Calling the number displayed in an SCP-6497 instance will result in the call going into voice mail, as well as the manifestation of SCP-6497-1 in the caller's dwelling approximately 12-48 hours later.

SCP-6497-1 is a contract which has the appearance of having been printed on a standard A4 sized paper. Discovered instances of SCP-6497-1 are identical to one another with no significant deviations, consisting of a brief introduction to the service, a space for a signature, and several squares with the intention of providing several choices of various body parts and organs.2 In addition, an empty space is provided for the writing of further details regarding the selected options.

Signing SCP-6497-1 in one's own signature causes the instance to demanifest as soon as physical contact with the paper is broken. Implementation of the service event, hereby referred to as CUSTOMER-Event, follows within 24-48 hours3, the details of which depend on the options chosen.

SCP-6497 activity was first detected in 2007 when reports of people being miraculously cured of their physical ailments by a salesman were reported all around the United States, similar cases having occurred yearly. Nearly all cases involved the individual being cured by the services of a salesman which they discovered through a commercial, descriptions of which being highly similar in all reported cases.

Research into individual cases initially revealed no evidence of the described commercials having been aired at any point in time, nor there existing a company that could be linked to any of the information acquired. Currently ongoing broadcast television surveillance did confirm the occasional appearance of SCP-6497 activity in the states of Ohio, Tennessee, Washington, Arizona and Alaska during the initial surveillance period.

Addendum 6497-1: CUSTOMER-Events

- Show Log

Civilians known to have been exposed to SCP-6497 during the initial surveillance period were detained, questioned and examined prior to being amnesticized. A theme of physical improvements was quickly recognized in the results of these cases.

Event #1

Subject: Harold Grimes

Details of SCP-6497-1: The subject had crossed out the option "Finger" on the contract.

Interview summary: The subject reported his finger being completely cured of the lasting damage he had sustained after contracting Seal finger4. The reported reason for him utilizing the service was the possibility of the lasting damage being relieved.

Event #2

Subject: Megan Hallow

Details of SCP-6497-1: The subject had crossed out the option "Eyes" on the contract.

Interview summary: The subject reported her eyesight having improved overnight, which he believes to be directly related to the service she was provided. The reported reason for her utilizing the service was her desire to join United States Air Force, which she was previously denied of due to her insufficient eyesight. She had refused to partake in the required testing despite her improved eyesight.

Event #3

Subject: Christopher Palmer

Details of SCP-6497-1: The subject had crossed out the option "Leg" on the contract. Additionally he had written further details regarding his wish, asking for the option to apply for both of his legs.

Interview summary: The subject reported his legs having developed more muscle mass overnight. The reported reason for him utilizing the service was his desire to win the local marathon contest without having to participate in active physical training which he described as "bothersome". Subject displayed apathy towards his surroundings, speaking only when spoken to, reason for this behavior being his lost will to attend the marathon.

Event #4

Subject: Helen Strick

Details of SCP-6497-1: The subject had crossed out the option "Other" on the contract, and given further details on how she would like her nose to be.

Interview summary: The subject reported her nose having been straightened and decreased in size overnight. While these were the details she had written down on SCP-6497-1, she displayed displeasure for the result.

Event #5

Subject: José Ortega

Details of SCP-6497-1: The subject had crossed out the option "Other" on the contract, and written "Brain" on the line next to the option square. He had then provided further details by writing down he wishes for his IQ to exceed 130.

Interview summary: The subject believed his IQ having vastly improved overnight, claiming he was accepted as a member of Mensa. This turned out to be false, and while the rest of his story was confirmed, he had repeatedly scored 115-1255 on the official Mensa IQ test, as opposed to the average score of 101 he had prior to the CUSTOMER-event.

Upon this being pointed out to him, he began to cry. He then explained his desire of developing his intelligence having been extinguished over the past week, which apparently was detrimental to his self-confidence.

Research notes: While the affected individuals had no notable physical traits justifying further measures, most of them seemed unwell mentally, behaving rather depressed with the exception of the individual Harold Grimes. We will know for sure only after we're finished with the examination, but the affected individuals mental state might be something of note.

Apparently this Harold Grimes fellow contracted seal finger again, what a waste of an anomaly.

- Researcher Jenner

VIDEO LOG

Date: 11 / 8 / 2007

Preword: The DNA-testing subsequent to the physical examination of subjects affected by a CUSTOMER-event was finished. Researcher Savos arrived in the office of Dr. West, who at the time was accompanied by Researcher Stork.

[ACCESSING SITE SURVEILLANCE RECORD…]

[BEGIN LOG]

Researcher Savos enters the room holding a document.

Dr. West: Momma didn't teach you how to knock?

Researcher Savos: My apologies, but you want to see this.

Dr. West: The results of SCP-6497 examination I assume. It better be or I'm sending you back to the door.

Savos hands Dr. West the document.

Dr. West: I see… and you're sure of this?

Researcher Savos: Yeah, we ran the tests 3 times. The DNA sequence is an exact match in all the cases so far.

Researcher Stork: Wait just a minute. You're telling me these people are clones of each other? That doesn't make any sense.

Dr. West: No Stork, it means the healed body parts are genetically identical to one another. Though now I highly doubt any healing has taken place at any point.

Researcher Savos: The DNA sequence though…

Dr. West: Inconclusive, yes yes. It's never that easy. What about the mental state of these people? Jenner was quite adamant of the possibility of the CUSTOMER-events having mind affecting consequences.

Researcher Savos: I think they seemed displeased of their situation in one way or the other, but at this point it's still too early to say anything for sure. So far I don't see anything concerning, but we'll keep an eye out in case more of these cases pop up.

Dr. West: I see. Now, if that's all then you're excused. Stork, we'll continue this conversation later. I have a call to make.

[END LOG]

Addendum 6497-2: Dr. West Research Notes

- Show Log

Audio Logs

Head of Research, Dr. Aaron West.

SCP-6497

It is currently 12th of August, 2007. 10:31 AM. This is Dr. West, currently assigned as the Head of Research at Site-76, investigating the anomaly designated as SCP-6497.

Lately there's no whiff about any new cases, so currently the leads we got now are pretty much all we have. Despite this I have confidence that there will be more cases popping up, hopefully because our means of detecting them improve as we get to know what we're dealing with here. As for the origin of SCP-6497 itself, current attempts to find whatever source the broadcast signal originates from are still ongoing. The mechanism behind SCP-6497's uncanny ability to broadcast itself in the television feed of singular households while bypassing the eyes of the general populace seems unfeasible, and will undoubtedly pose a challenge in finding the signal, assuming there is one.

More people are being affected as I sit here babbling into my recorder, though it's likely this has been going on for a while at least right under our noses. We have reported cases, but if this is like pretty much any crime out there, we sure as hell don't know the half of it.

21st of August, 2007. Dr. West, continuing with the investigation of SCP-6497.

The initial surveillance period is nearly finished, with 2 new confirmed cases of CUSTOMER-Events discovered since the the last checkup. DNA testing yielded the exact same results, can't say I'm surprised. Our readiness in terms of fast response and recovery have improved vastly, though we have been unsuccessful in finding the broadcast signal associated with SCP-6497 activity.

The apprehended individuals were given the same physical evaluation, but Jenner was given full permission to go evaluate them with her theory in mind. Jenner's a capable woman, if she has a reasonable hunch, then I'm not stopping it.

Anyway, turns out she might be onto something. She pointed out the last batch of "customers" were all quite unhappy, if not with their current predicament, then with the result of whatever drove them to sign that contract. Pretty understandable, so I didn't pay too much mind to it. Then this kid from the last batch told how he dropped out of school some time after the CUSTOMER-Event took place. He even passed the test, why drop out now? Apparently he too wanted to become more intelligent like that other guy, but also wrote his little wish on the paper to get himself a pair of muscly arms. You know, back in my day we just studied harder and went to the gym when we had time instead of signing shady contracts like absolute dimwits. I swear, motivation is wasted on the youth.

12th of September, 2007. 6:13 PM. Just earlier we got news which could change the course of this goose chase. A researcher from an unrelated project on this site saw an SCP-6497 commercial, and actually managed to record most of it on his phone. I happen to have the displeasure of knowing the guy's an underachiever, but I suppose all motivation-challenged slugs have their day.

As for the recording, what we got from the witness reports matches what we saw, and so far there's nothing indicating instances of SCP-6497 having cognitohazardous traits. Must be easy selling this when there's idiots around every corner. Speaking of which, this "Salesman", who- or whatever it may be, is either poor at what it does, or happens to get whatever it wants simply by the implementation of CUSTOMER-events. Either way, we now have a lot of fleshy spare parts to hunt down. It's just hard to imagine a reasonable motive for any of this, and finally getting to hear that voice myself makes this feel that much more personal to me.

Sigh. I really don't believe there's anything at the moment we can do to actually halt SCP-6497 activity, best we can do is suppress whatever activity we happen to detect. I have faith in my team, but there's only so much we can do with the leads we have, and even those aren't that much in the end. Stork blurred out his theory of the original body parts having been completely swapped with these anomalous ones instead of having gone through some genetic altering. It's certainly a thought to consider, and answers have a tendency to just create more questions. I don't want want to jump to any conclusions, but I don't want to rule out any possibilities either.

Stay ambitious, fair researchers of Site-76. Even you Stork.

Addendum 6497-3: Incident Report

- Show File

27 / 9 / 2007 Dr. West discovered a small bottle containing a purple liquid substance on the desk in his office. A small note was tied to the neck of the bottle with a decorative string.

A little preview for my favorite go-getter. Keep up the good work!

-Dr. Wink

Upon making contact with the bottle, the television in Dr. West's office turned on and started displaying a commercial very similar in pattern with the commercial linked to SCP-6497 activity. Said commercial advertised a service titled "Dr. Wink's Fantabulous Service For Unmotivated Go-Getters!". It played in loop for 3 times before ending abruptly. Dr. West managed to record most of the commercial.

Dr. West reported the appearance of the bottle, and investigation could prove no apparent reason as to how the bottle got into Dr. West's office unnoticed, or why the anomaly attempted communication with him. Following this, the purple substance was determined as a part of SCP-6497 activity, and designated as SCP-6497-2.

Experiment 6497-A

Date: 27 / 9 / 2007

Subject: D-1190

Attending researcher: Researchers Jenner and Savos

Procedure: Subject was ordered to ingest SCP-6497-2 in order to study any physical or mental effects on human beings. Subject was held in an observation cell for the duration of the procedure.

[BEGIN LOG]

13:00 D-1190 receives the order to ingest a small sample of SCP-6497-2, which he complies.

13:02 No effects detected. Attending researchers continue the observation of the subject.

13:11 Increase in dopamine detected.

13:13 Subject's mood seems to improve, indicated by his body language and gestures.

13:15 Subject is ordered to stand on his right foot while reciting the alphabets in reverse order. Subject complies immediately, and carries out the task with no difficulty.

13:30 No further notable effects are observed. Guards enter the observation cell, and order D-1190 to exit. D-1190 complies, and returns to his cell with no resistance, still retaining his elevated mood.

[END LOG]

Afterword: No alterations to the physique of the subject was observed, DNA- or otherwise. Further testing to be commenced shortly.

Experiment 6497-B

Date: 27 / 9 /2007

Subject: D-1190, D-6026 and D-4385

Attending researcher: Researchers Jenner and Savos

Procedure: The subjects were ordered to ingest a sample of SCP-6497-2, with the exception of D-1190 as he had recently been exposed to it. Subjects were instructed to perform a task which is designed to measure ones intelligence, and ability to perform in teamwork. Subjects were held in an observation cell for the duration of the procedure.

[BEGIN LOG]

The subjects enter the room escorted by 2 guards. The subjects then watch the guards unlock the door on the way back, and exit the observation cell.

15:00 D-6026 and D-4385 are ordered to ingest SCP-6497-2, both of which hesitate to do so. D-1190 encourages them to comply with the orders, claiming he has felt content after consuming it himself.

15:01 D-6026 and D-4385 comply.

15:12 Both subjects display elevated dopamine levels highly similar to what was observed in experiment 6497-A.

15:15 The subjects are presented with a puzzle box which requires problem solving skills, as well as precise timing achievable through teamwork to successfully open. Subjects observe the box, immediately sharing their thoughts of it with each other.

15:21 The box is successfully opened. The subjects compliment each other, seemingly having forgotten the presence of the observers.

15:22 Attending researchers leave the observation area to monitor the behavior of the subjects via camera feed.

15:29 The subjects gather together to converse, keeping the volume of their speech too low for the audio recording equipment to pick up.

15:32 D-6026 runs into the corner of the room, and begins to "draw" patterns onto the floor with his finger. Camera feed zooms in to recognize them, but is unable to see anything unusual.

15:33 D-1190 and D-4385 manage to open the electronic combination lock of the observation cell door. A nearby guard sets off the alarm.

15:34 D-1190 and D-4385 narrowly evade the guards gunfire. D-6026 exits the observation cell and attempts to tackle the guard, but is terminated via gunfire by another guard.

15:35 D-1190 and D-4385 are located and terminated via gunfire.

[END LOG]

Afterword: It is suspected the patterns D-6026 "drew" were simply a distraction with the intention of drawing the observers attention towards himself. How D-1190 and D-4385 managed to unlock the door is not known.

The results of the experiment indicate SCP-6497-2's effects being of possible value to the Foundation. The subjects demonstrated elevated performance in regard to communication and intelligence. Opening the box took them only 6 minutes and 27 seconds, while the average among recorded attempts is nearly 15 minutes. The swiftly formed plan of escape is thought to be the result of SCP-6497-2's effects.

Addendum 6497-4: Containment Update

- Credentials Verified

It was thought approaching the investigation from the viewpoint of a salesman could expedite the investigation process. Dr. West contacted Dr. Harmon of Site-109, who was known for his expertise in Economic- and Trading Sciences. Below is the chat log of their conversation.

A. West 8/10/07 MON 12:05 #1

Good day Dr. Harmon

T. Harmon 8/10/07 MON 12:05 #2

Good day. I understood you needed my help with an anomalous product of sorts?

A. West 8/10/07 MON 12:06 #3

Well yes, soon so to be product at least. We have reason to believe the distribution will start soon, and any help on how we could prevent this is appreciated.

T. Harmon 8/10/07 MON 12:06 #4

Of course. Just give me a moment to get to know what we got here.

A. West 8/10/07 MON 12:07 #5

6497SCP.zip

6497comm2.mov

I must ask you to delete this information after we are done.

T. Harmon 8/10/07 MON 12:23 #6

Looks like what we have here is someone doing dirty business. You're now aware of the product, but the question of supply isn't so clear.

A. West 8/10/07 MON 12:24 #7

Any ideas? If this is a business, there has to be something to gain from this. There has to be a reliable supply of whatever is used to make SCP-6497-2, and a sufficient demand for it.

T. Harmon 8/10/07 MON 12:25 #8

Now you're thinking the way you should. And that is what leads us to what I believe to be the most believable answer. You see, businessmen are alike with any other people in one important way.

If they wish to achieve something, they need to want it. What one needs is three distinct tools needed to success. Appropriate skill and knowledge, the will to want it, and the will to put effort into whatever it is they desire. In some cases the latter two are arguably more important than actual skill because they are needed in order to push an individual to improve oneself to learn and strive towards the goal they have set their mind on.

A. West 8/10/07 MON 12:28 #9

So what you're saying is that this is actual motivation in a bottle?

T. Harmon 8/10/07 MON 12:28 #10

That's about it, yes. You could also call it desire. And it has to come from somewhere. Is the picture getting clearer to you?

A. West 8/10/07 MON 12:29 #11

Researcher Stork proposed a theory about how the original body parts of CUSTOMER-Event affected individuals are actually completely taken. While that seems more plausible by the second, that's not what's important here. It's what was taken along them.

T. Harmon 8/10/07 MON 12:30 #12

Well there's the equivalent of a supply chain in this case.

A. West 8/10/07 MON 12:30 #13

That would make sense. Whatever motivation they had was clearly wasted on them. Thank you, I know what must be done.

T. Harmon 8/10/07 MON 12:30 #14

Say, have you been feeling tired lately?

A. West 8/10/07 MON 12:31 #15

Now that you mention it, yes. The investigation of this thing honestly hasn't progressed much until very recently.

T. Harmon 8/10/07 MON 12:31 #16

Do you understand market segmentation?

A. West 8/10/07 MON 12:32 #17

Enough to know your point based just on the fact you even knew to ask that of me.

T. Harmon 8/10/07 MON 12:33 #18

Best of luck, doctor.

To: Site Director Waltz

From: Aaron West

Subject: SCP-6497 Update

Date: 12/ 1 /2008

Hello Director

I am pleased to inform you we have managed to redirect the distribution of SCP-6497-2 from civilian consumers to exclusively Site-76. Using instances of SCP-6497-1 affiliated with the service "Dr. Wink's Fantabulous Service for Unmotivated Go-Getters!" on a monthly basis to order more SCP-6497-2 instances than it is possible to produce, we should be able to purchase the entire stock, preventing them from reaching civilians. The fact that no cases of commercials advertising said service have been detected outside Site-76 seems to support this hypothesis.

While we are still very much incapable of completely halting SCP-6497 activity and the "harvesting" of SCP-6497-2, I believe doing so would be a mistake even should we be able to do so. Cutting off the supply could potentially result in SCP-6497 changing its usual activity to adapt to "a new market." Best we keep things as predictable as possible.

The research team has recognized the SCP-6497-2's potential capability to be used for the benefit of the Foundation, as the test results have so far been nothing but encouraging. Even if using it after all this has a certain sense of irony. Future use as efficiency enhancement in small doses is a possibility, though the research is most likely better suited for another team.

The Special Containment Procedures revised to account for this new information will be delivered in your office by tomorrow afternoon for approval.

Motivation shouldn't come from the bottom of a bottle, but rather your character. Though a glass of scotch every now and then does no harm. Still, as much as these new developments have benefited us, I can't shake off the feeling it was us who got the short end of the stick here.

Footnotes

1. Most cases are likely to go unreported.

2. The provided options are following: Hand, Arm, Finger, Leg, Eyes and Other.

3. The exact time seems to depend on the scale of the event.

4. An infection which is usually contracted as a result of unprotected seal handling.

5. A minimum score of 130 is required to pass the test.