The inhumanity of Human Resources.

Canon Hub » Site-17 Deepwell Catalog / Department of Tactical Theology » SCP-8413

Site-17 Sector-13D, c. 1984

Item #: SCP-8413

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-8413 has been sealed off from the rest of Site-17’s East Wing. The pathways from Sectors-14Q, -10Z, and -11A to SCP-8413 have been locked.

The 27 surviving personnel1 who witnessed Incident-4/10/2023-SCP-8413 have been amnesticized and reassigned to Tactical Theology offices at Site-270. Internal disinformation has been disseminated, explaining this as a precautionary measure following the breach of an infohazardous anomaly.

The witnessing personnel are to be monitored for any lingering side effects from the incident. However, this is deemed unlikely and is of low priority status.

Description: SCP-8413 refers to Sector-13D of Site-17’s East Wing. Sector-13D was formerly the center of operations for Site-17’s branch of the Department of Tactical Theology, established in the September of 1984 to aid in the containment of [RESTRICTED TO PERSONNEL WITH 5/SINGING CROW CLEARANCE].

It is believed that over a period of at least 10 years, safety guidelines were improperly followed, leading to a build-up of Akiva radiation in the structure and the events of Incident-4/10/2023-SCP-8413.2 Incident-4/10/2023-SCP-8413 remains one of the rare cases on record of Akiva radiation causing such drastic effects on a physical environment.

During the event, several discrete anomalous phenomena were reported. These included:

Elevated temperatures;

An omnipresent smell of burning printer ink;

Prophetic visions;

The manifestation and demanifestation of office appliances;

The voice of Site Director Thomas Graham (PID-0017DW) playing over the PA System, giving contradictory and nonsensical instructions;

Ashby Protocol was engaged to isolate Sector-13D from the rest of the facility. Decontamination Procedure OPAQUE FESTIVAL was successfully initiated by on-Site Task Forces. Approximately three hours later, the majority of anomalous activity ceased.

It is currently theorized that the critical levels of Akiva radiation within Sector-13D caused some manner of [REDACTED BY ORDER OF THE SCP-8413 INVESTIGATIVE TEAM].

NOTICE FROM THE FOUNDATION RECORDS AND INFORMATION SECURITY ADMINISTRATION

The remainder of SCP-8413's description is not to be published until an accurate phrasing can be agreed upon by both the Ethics Committee and Site-17 Administration. The previous description (Revision #023) was denied due to including a number of disputed terms. At issue are the words "judgement", "justice", "punishment", and "thematic".

— Jane Berezovsky-Fischer (PID-4851KS), Archivist, RAISA

Addendum — SCP-8413 Sub-Anomalies

Five sub-anomalies of SCP-8413 have persisted to the present day. Each of these anomalies involved the modification of the bodies of five specific personnel employed at Sector-13D as well as the surrounding environs. (See below for more details.)

The affected personnel appear to be in an anomalous state of suspended animation, and attempts to move them from their current positions have been met with failure. Euthanasia proposals pending approval.

The list of employees kept within SCP-8413 is as follows:

SCP-8413-A is Dr. Anthony Winch (PID-4921SW), assigned as Sector-13D's Manager. Dr. Winch's body below the waist has been fed into Sector-13D's industrial paper shredder, which remained active despite being disconnected from its power supply. Dr. Winch has yet to pass out from blood loss. Additionally, Dr. Winch's cell phone has been split into two parts, which have been partially fused onto opposite sides of Dr. Winch's head in a manner similar to antennas or goat horns. The phone remains powered on; Dr. Winch appears to have been in the process of texting Rsr. Rees. Occasionally, texts are received from an unknown number, causing Dr. Winch's head to vibrate. His vocalizations suggest extreme distress and/or arousal.

SCP-8413-B is Dr. Emily Park (PID-2313IK), assigned as a Senior Researcher at Sector-13D. The majority of Dr. Park's epidermis has been stripped from her bones and replaced with cables sourced from the personal computers of both Dr. Park and Rsr. Rees. Additionally, the fire suppression system within Sector-13D has been powered on in the room containing SCP-8413-B. Freezing water pours down onto Dr. Park's body, causing her to suffer hypothermia and constant electrocution. To prevent the room's flooding, a drain system has been built into Sector-13D. Her Foundation-issued diploma was found missing and has not been located.

SCP-8413-C is Dr. Daan Van Dijk (PID-9092RG), assigned as Sector-13D's Human Resources and Ethics Committee Liaison. Broken shards of glass sourced from Dr. Van Dijk's office were stabbed into his ears, causing him to perpetually bleed from the affected orifices. Acidic correction fluid constantly pours into his eyes, blinding him. Additionally, wires sourced from Sector-13D's telephone system have been forced down his throat. His tongue has been removed, and the stump has been cauterized. Furthermore, Dr. Van Dijk was found to have been anomalously moved 3 meters into the air, and his neck became entangled with the lighting system, trapping him in place. His legs thrash weakly as he sways back and forth. Official Complaint Forms spill out of a gash in his torso, [REDACTED BY ORDER OF THE SCP-8413 INVESTIGATIVE TEAM].

SCP-8413-D is Dr. Ingrid Wagner (PID-1732AO), assigned as a [REDACTED BY ORDER OF THE SCP-8413 INVESTIGATIVE TEAM]. Dr. Wagner's head appears to have been partially fused with Sector-13D's HP USB Single Station Thermal Receipt Printer, constantly staying at an extremely high temperature. It is heavily damaged, melting into her flesh and causing her 3rd degree burns. Attempts to extinguish the flames have failed. It constantly ejects hot printer ink into her mouth, causing her severe physical distress. The device remains partially functional. The printer constantly prints a number of garbled documents, primarily unsent resignation letters signed by Rsr. Rees. Furthermore, [REDACTED BY ORDER OF THE SCP-8413 INVESTIGATIVE TEAM]. Per Resolution EC/FSD #0001, investigation into SCP-8413-D has been strictly prohibited.

SCP-8413-E is Amelia Rees (PID-4729FP), assigned as a Junior Researcher at Sector-13D. [REDACTED BY ORDER OF THE SCP-8413 INVESTIGATIVE TEAM], [REDACTED BY ORDER OF THE SCP-8413 INVESTIGATIVE TEAM], over 300,000 staples pushed into her hands and feet, trapping her against the wall in a splayed-out position. [REDACTED BY ORDER OF THE SCP-8413 INVESTIGATIVE TEAM] vivisection revealed that Rsr. Rees's lungs had been replaced by several Employee of the Month awards, causing asphyxiation. [REDACTED BY ORDER OF THE SCP-8413 INVESTIGATIVE TEAM]. Despite this, Rsr. Rees remains conscious and capable of vocalization. [REDACTED BY ORDER OF THE SCP-8413 INVESTIGATIVE TEAM].

Footnotes

1. Count disputed. A small minority of the SCP-8413 Investigative Team maintains that there were 32 survivors.

2. Under normal circumstances, Dr. Anthony Winch, as the office supervisor, would be subject to disciplinary action for Class-V Negligence. For obvious reasons, such action has been withheld.