To pee or not to pee



⚠️ Content warning: NSFW - sexual references

SCP-8788: Dihydrogen Monoxide

Author: Anonymodesu

⚠️ content warning

Item#: 8788

Containment Class: keter

Secondary Class: none

Disruption Class: ekhi

Risk Class: notice

Victim of SCP-8788.

Special Containment Procedures: Hidden cameras monitor Foundation-owned and high-traffic public restrooms. Individuals suspected to have ingested SCP-8788 are transferred to the nearest Foundation site, where they undergo Operation Dehydration.

Specialty-class UR-1-NE centrifuges are installed in both public-sector and Foundation-owned water treatment facilities, where SCP-8788 is filtered out and delivered to the nearest Foundation site. SCP-8788 is provided as drinking water for select D-Class personnel, and supervising wardens assume the full-time responsibility for the continuous enactment of Operation Dehydration.

The following containment procedures are conditionally executed, until SCP-8788's global manifestation frequency has been limited below certain thresholds:1

SCP-8788 is publicly advertised and sold as healthy bottled formula for infants.

Operation Siccitas is performed on Exspes-Class population centres.

Automated tasers are installed in Foundation restrooms.

Personnel assigned to SCP-8788 may request a project transfer after twelve weeks of service.

Description: SCP-8788 is a variant of water, with a density of 985kg/m3 at room temperature2. Its anomalous effects manifest when any human in a populated restroom has a bladder containing at least 72ml of SCP-8788.3

A successful manifestation compels all present individuals to use adjacent toilets and engage in pleasant conversation, with a strong tendency to expose personal information. Throughout the conversation, SCP-8788 would self-replicate in each individual's urinary system to sustain the discharge of urine. In most recorded cases, the total discharge far exceeds the capacity of any human bladder.

Urinary excretion wanes as the conversation naturally concludes, signalling the end of the manifestation. Interviews with affected subjects afterward suggest that their interpersonal relationships have improved, and that they aren't troubled by their anomalous urinary performance.

In the event where SCP-8788 attempts to manifest, but there exists a language barrier between the individuals involved, the volume of SCP-8788 in their bladders is neutralised into non-anomalous water upon urination.

Addendum: The following logs are a representative sample of incidents caused by SCP-8788. For access to the full collection, consult Dr. Nations Dr. Pi.

Incident 8788.12564

Men's restroom, Macon Mall, Georgia, United States

Three men discuss their medical issues. Field agents are dispatched and the affected subjects are delivered to Site-242 for Operation Dehydration.

Participant
Duration (min)
Est. Volume (L)
Est. Constituent SCP-8788

T. Lambert
20.57
16.66
0.55%

S. Avery
20.67
14.88
0.00%

P. Foster
20.72
15.92
0.00%

[ VIDEO LOG ]

Foster shoves Avery against the wall.

Avery: Dude, I'm sorry alright? It was a mistake.

Foster: A mistake, happens fucking once. You've been fucking her for the past fucking 3 years.

Avery: Look, I've known her since we were kids. She had a problem, and I helped her through it.

Foster: If Sandra has a problem, she needs to take it up with me. It's none of your fucking busi-

Lambert sprints into the restroom. The trio unzip their trousers and begin peeing.

Lambert: Shit shit shit! Ahhh…made it.

Foster: You alright buddy?

Lambert: Infected urethra. Hard to control the urges.

Avery: Oh, it burns as well doesn't it? I've got to help my dad when the nurse isn't around.

Foster: I'm fine with holding it in, but I have trouble getting it up.

Avery: Sandra did mention something of the sort.

Lambert: I've got pills for that back at my place, if you guys wanna come hang.

[ Remaining discussion omitted ]

Incident 8788.13588

Women's restroom, Westfield, London, England

Women discuss childcare in the restroom. There is a surplus of women, hence latecomers need to wait for a toilet. Field agents are dispatched and the affected subjects are delivered to Site-44 for Operation Dehydration. External witnesses of the event are administered Class A amnestics.

Participant
Duration (min)
Est. Volume (L)
Est. Constituent SCP-8788

Y. Nakamura
10.54
7.88
5.86%

A. Hassan
32.24
24.92
3.21%

M. Chen
12.24
10.21
3.05%

G. Laurent
10.20
8.95
0.45%

N. Sokolov
18.24
15.14
0.00%

[ 13 civilians omitted for brevity ]

[ VIDEO LOG ]

Miller is standing beside Chen, watching her.

Chen: So my doctor was like, "no, you'll get incontinence in your third trimester, you should take your meds."

Simpson is standing at Nakamura's cubicle entrance, watching her.

Nakamura: But look at you now! You've been peeing for the last 5 minutes.

Laurent: You go girl! I love seeing me some good bladder control.

Wyatt is lying underneath Sokolov's cubicle door, watching her.

Sokolov: It's been amazing to get to know you ladies, but my boyfriend's going to yap at me for taking so long.

Chen: Ugh, can relate. My husband complains so much.

Sokolov leaves. Wyatt stands up and takes her place.

Wyatt: You know, when the little guy comes out, you could try giving him SCP-F.

Chen: Ah, I think I saw it on TV. What was it again? Safe Controlled Pee Formula?

Barclay: Whoever came up with that name is a dumbass.

Lachlan: Isn't it weird it comes bottled? Isn't formula usually powdered?

Wyatt: I heard it's pretty good at balancing the baby's hydration levels.

Hassan: Perhaps a little too good. Alice wets herself whenever I take her to the changeroom.

[ Remaining discussions omitted ]

Incident 8788.17894

Private Bathroom, Site 19 F-6

Department Director H. Silva enters her office bathroom. An unidentified man steps out of a locker, decloaks his camo-tech and holsters his firearm. They share origami techniques, before being interrupted by the automated security system.

Participant
Duration (min)
Est. Volume (L)
Est. Constituent SCP-8788

Dir. Silva
2.56
2.01
6.54%

Man
2.55
2.21
0.00%

Addendum: The man has been identified as a Chaos Insurgency operative. He is detained and scheduled for interrogation.

[ DEBRIEFING LOG ]

Agent Bravo: Sorry about that ma'am. We'll get you cleaned up.

Dir. Silva: Why. The hell. Are there tasers in my toilet.

Agent Bravo: New site protocol while you were on sabbatical. Handed down by O5-█.

Dir. Silva: What? Okay, well let's get into that later. Help me up.

Agent Bravo: Negative on that order. As per protocol, I must remain outside this bathroom.

Dir. Silva: There's literally a man in the shower, with a gun. What if he wakes up?

Agent Bravo: Rest assured he's harmless while you remain in your bathroom. We'll deal with him after the drone arrives to deliver you to Operation Dehydration.

Dir. Silva: …operation what?

OPERATION DEHYDRATION - Foreword

I know most of you complained once you were assigned to SCP-8788. Look, I get it, studying urine isn't anyone's cup of tea. Suck it up. You're given the option to rotate out after 3 months anyway. There are far worse things you could be doing in the Foundation.

Worse things such as Operation Dehydration. Unfortunately, it's the most reliable method we've got to keep manifestation numbers down. For whatever reason, the skip turns to regular water if the people can't speak with each other. So we've arranged for some special D-Class to act as water purifiers, and you'll be making sure they're peeing right, 10 hours a day. Same applies if a civilian wanders to a toilet and starts announcing their life story. We snatch them and flush SCP-8788 from their system.

Some of you might ask, what's the point? Why go to such lengths to stop a bit of gossiping? Well just like gossip, this piss spreads. And spreads fast. Worst case: LK-Class scenario. Elimination of privacy, and our precious veil becomes as flimsy as soggy toilet paper. On top of that, each manifestation effectively grows the volume of water on Earth, a net increase in global sea levels. So unless you want to drown the planet in humanity's piss, do your job.

- Dr. Y. Nations

The following is provided as an audiovisual aid to onboard staff onto Operation Dehydration. Subjects suspected to have ingested SCP-8788 are moved to the nearest Foundation site. To improve efficiency of the operation, civilians are exposed to a Class I Obedience cognitohazard.

[VIDEO LOG]

Dr. Pi: Are you ready to begin?

Rogan: I just woke up, so it's hard.

Dr. Pi: …

Rogan: …

D-3523: …

Dr. Pi: Have you calmed down?

Rogan: Uhh, a little.

Dr. Pi: Proceed.

Rogan and D-3523 start doing their business.

D-3523: …

Rogan: …

Dr. Pi: Flow is at a steady 14ml/s.

Rogan: …

D-3523: …

Rogan: …

D-3523: Scheiße!4

Dr. Nations: Spillage identified. Please aim your discharge.

Rogan: Sorry.

D-3523: …

Rogan: …

Dr. Pi: Total volume measures 229.6ml. Elapsed time is 16.4s. Is that alright, Yuri?

Dr. Nations: It is within acceptable parameters.

Rogan: So, when can I go home?

Dr. Pi (off-mic): From his blood test, the anomaly constituted 18% of his bloodstream.

Dr. Nations: Based on your historical metrics, we predict another 33 iterations before you're cleared.

The following is provided as an audiovisual aid to onboard staff onto Operation Dehydration. Water treatment facilities divert SCP-8788 from public sector use, where it is instead delivered to Foundation sites and provided as potable water for select D-Class personnel. D-Class wardens marshal their personnel into groups of mutually exclusive language backgrounds for toilet breaks.

[VIDEO LOG]

Moreau: Ahem. Urinate. 排尿. التبول. Мочиться. ปัสสาวะ. Urineren.

The D-Class personnel enter the restroom.

D-2332: …

D-1134: …

D-8456: …

D-3254: …

D-0013: …

D-8688: …

Dr. Pi: 3254.

Moreau: Hmm, I'll go with 8688.

Dr. Pi: By the way, your Chinese improved.

Moreau: I've been practising.

D-2332: …

D-1134: …

D-8456: …

D-3254: …

D-0013: …

D-8688: …

Moreau: Ha! 8688 outlasted everyone. That's 88 wins for me. Against what, 31?

Dr. Pi: What did you bribe them with this time? 2-ply toilet paper?

Moreau: Don't be a sore loser. You just need to pay better attention.

Dr. Pi: Whatever. I'll catch up eventually. Bring in the next batch Moreau.

Incident 8788.18012

Women's restroom, Site 19 A-23

A captured Chaos Insurgency operative has resisted standard interrogation strategies. To identify his rationale and methods for infiltrating Site-19, SCP-8788 is provisionally approved as an interrogation aid. MTF Sigma-3 is requested for assistance, given their experience with espionage. A large restroom is selected to fulfil the seating requirements.

Participant
Duration (min)
Est. Volume (L)
Est. Constituent SCP-8788

CI Operative
58.02
49.93
0.54%

Agent Alpha
58.02
51.23
0.00%

Agent Bravo
54.21
46.51
0.00%

Agent Charlie
51.79
41.02
0.00%

Agent Delta
49.83
39.64
0.00%

[ 22 agents omitted for brevity ]

[ VIDEO LOG ]

CI Operative: Yes, this is great. A whole squadron wants to watch me take a whiz.

Agent Alpha: Shut it.

CI Operative: I might have been caught, but at least I can make you Foundation fucks waste time.

Agent Alpha: Step inside before I waste your as-

Agent Alpha and the CI Operative cross the boundary of the restroom.

Agent Alpha: Man, you look terrible. Johnston didn't pull his punches.

CI Operative: The interrogator? Yeah, well, he's just doing his job right?

Agent Alpha: As are we all. Got to put food on the table for the family. Somehow.

CI Operative: Family. I'm surprised Johnston didn't try to pull that card.

Agent Alpha: How do you mean?

CI Operative: Not that it would've worked on me, but when the Insurgency captures one of you folks, your family is like, the third thing we threaten you with.

Agent Alpha: That's pretty lame. Back when I was interrogator, we started with sleep deprivation and starvation.

CI Operative: Pfft. Those are training wheels. Went through 6 months of that for orientation.

Agent Alpha: Alright then, tough guy. What would it take to break you?

CI Operative: You could [REDACTED]. Or if I'm feeling stubborn, try [REDACTED] through my intestines. And shoot me up with adrenaline to keep me conscious.

Agent Alpha and the CI operative exchange interrogation techniques.

[ Remaining discussion omitted. Agent Bravo is asked to interrupt them. ]

CI Operative: Huh. Didn't know you could use honey like that.

Agent Bravo: Speaking of honey, I smeared it onto a foot infection in our last assignment. Worked like a charm.

The agents and the CI operative discuss feet.

[ Remaining discussion omitted. Agent Charlie is asked to interrupt them. ]

Agent Charlie: When Alex twisted his ankle, I just told him to get over it. Kids heal up fast.

The agents and the CI operative share parenting tips.

[ Remaining discussion omitted. Agent Delta is asked to interrupt them. ]

The agents and the CI operative provide the extent of what they know about [REDACTED].

[ Discussion omitted. Agent Echo is asked to interrupt them. ]

The agents and the CI operative debate pineapple on pizza.

[ 19 discussions omitted. Simultaneous urination and the restroom's reverb has led to an ambient noise level of 71 decibels. ]

Agent Bravo: AND THAT'S HOW WHISKEY GOT LOST ON HER FIRST DAY ON THE JOB.

Agent Xray: CAN'T BLAME HER. SITE-19 IS A MAZE.

Agent Charlie: YO! XRAY! WELCOME TO THE PARTY.

Agent Lima: IT'S A MAZE FOR A REASON. MAKES IT HARDER FOR GUYS LIKE SULLIVAN TO FIND THEIR WAY AROUND.

Sullivan: SECURITY BY OBSCURITY. THAT'S HARDLY RELIABLE.

Agent Bravo: THAT'S WHY WE HAVE 24/7 SECURITY DETAIL, BIOMETRIC SCANS, AND SURVEILLANCE, EVEN IN THE TOILETS.

Sullivan: HEY, WE'VE GOT THAT TOO, BACK AT FIREBASE-8. WELL, SORTA. CONTROL ROOM STAFF ROTATE AT 2AM SHARP, SO SOMEONE COULD SNEAK IN THEN.

Agent Whiskey: I'VE HEARD OUR CONTROL ROOM SYSTEMS GET SHUT OFF AT 2AM AS WELL. FOR SOFTWARE UPDATES OR SOME SUCH.

The agents and Sullivan share security loopholes in their respective facilities.

[ Remaining discussion omitted. ]

Sullivan: REALLY. I LOOPED AROUND YOUR BASE, TWICE, LOOKING FOR THE OPENING TO THAT TUNNEL.

Agent Sierra: WE CAN SHOW YOU IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE US.

Addendum: The agents file out of the room with Sullivan. Agents Yankee and Zulu attempt to stop them, but they assert, "they're giving their friend a tour of the site." The affected subjects are stopped by security before reaching Evac Route F6, and amnesticised.

680 litres of SCP-8788 is produced by this incident. Sullivan's entry route into Site-19 remains unclear. 18 members of MTF Sigma-3 are treated for minor dysphonia and hearing loss. SCP-8788 is prohibited from future experimentation.

Addendum: MTF Omega-45 is deployed following Sullivan's account of Insurgency Firebase-8. The base is raided, recovering SCP-████, SCP-████ and [REDACTED], with no casualties.

SCP-8788 may be procured with approval from personnel with Level 4 clearance.

Incident 8788.33253

The following news excerpt is found in the April 2022 print edition of the Wall Street Journal.

Twitter acquisition by business magnate Elon Musk announced. Twitter CEO, Parag Agrawal, believes that Musk is a passionate believer in the platform, and will support its longevity and growth. When asked about what precipitated this unprecedented event, Agrawal claims, "We bumped into each other at the NYC Tech Forum, when we were preparing for our talks. We ended up having a mature conversation and settled our differences."

OPERATION SICCITAS - Foreword

It pains me to say this, but Incident 64466 ███████ █████████ ███-████ ██ █ ███████ ██ █████, ████ █ ███████ ██ █████ ██ ████ ███████████. ███ █████████ ███████ ████████ ████ ███ █████ ██ █ █████████ ████████ ███ █ ███████ ██████████ ██ █████ ████ ██ ███-████:

█ ██████████ █████████████ ███████ ███ ███████ ███████████ ██ ███ ████████ ███████ ███ ██████.

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██ ███ █████ █████ ███-████ ████████ ██ ████████, ███ █████ ██████ █ ████████ ███████ ███████ ███ ███████████ ████████, ███ ██████ ██ ███-████. ██ █████ ████████ ██ ███████████ ████ ███-█████████ █████ ████ █████████.5

- Dr. Y. Nations

Addendum: Operation Siccitas is no longer necessary. To preserve employee morale, its details are memetically sealed, and those involved are amnesticised. Contingent on the emergence of another Exspes-Class population centre, its anti-memetic encryption may be lifted with approval from Level 4 personnel or Dr. Nations Dr. Pi.

Alice Springs.

Incident 8788.64466

Alice Springs, Northern Territory, Australia

03/07/2023: Rio Tinto, a mining company, reports 8% lower productivity for the 2023 fiscal year. Managers claim employees are taking longer than average bathroom breaks.

12/08/2023: The Hot Topic, a sensationalist news tabloid, lampoons the poor construction of septic tanks in the region, citing 8 tanks that overflowed in the past 2 weeks.

12/09/2023:

Incident 8788.64466.1

Boy's restroom, Bloomfield Primary School

Civilians discuss various topics. Since this restroom was not monitored, the Foundation was alerted to the manifestation by several reports of missing children. A recovery team arrives 1 hour, 49 minutes later, and external witnesses are amnesticised. Survivors are delivered to Site-84 for Operation Dehydration and medical treatment.

Note: Some values below are lower bounds, based on available video evidence.

Participant
Duration (min)
Est. Volume (L)
Est. Constituent SCP-8788

Z. Fowley
> 355.53
> 370.18
55.54%

G. Goodwin
> 120.53
> 110.10
50.01%

Const. Murray
0.30
0.22
48.34%

A. Quill
122.53
99.34
47.24%

J. Green
0.00
0.00
43.05%

[ 98 civilians omitted for brevity ]

The footage below is recovered from Constable F. Murray's bodycam.

[ VIDEO LOG ]

A police car pulls up to the scene.

Const. Murray: Oi! Johno! Bloody scorcher today aye?

Green: Huh? Just you Fred? The chick told me there'd be a whole unit swingin' by.

Const. Murray: Well it's hittin' 40 degrees, and the air-con in the car's still busted so the guys weren't too keen on-

Green: You know what? Doesn't matter. I gotta get back to the classroom before the principal puts me through the wringer.

Const: Murray: Hol' up. I'll need your ID and-

Green: You fuckin' know who I am.

Const. Murray: And you haven't explained nothin'.

Green: Yeah nah so earlier this mornin' the kids started disappearin' into this toilet. Two teachers gone off to look into it, but haven't seen 'em since.

Const. Murray: You pulling me leg Johno?

Green: At first I thought it was the kids gettin' into another fight. Animals, the lot of 'em. But now I reckon it gotta be some voodoo black magic goin' on.

Const. Murray: I ain't getting paid enough for this.

Green: Me neither mate. Well give it a crack, and I'll catch you at the pub t'night yeah?

Const. Murray: Yeah brah.

Green leaves. Murray ventures closer to the restroom.

Const. Murray: Farkin 'ell. Stinks worse than a wombat's nutsa-

Murray steps onto a bathroom tile and walks into the restroom. A few urinating teachers and students come into view, with several others watching them. Murray joins as a spectator.

Fowley: There's Ruby over at Barker Street. She cleans a mean pipe for just thirty bucks.

A. Marlin: H-hey Georgie? What's Mr. Fowley and Mr. Jones talking about?

G. Marlin: Silly Archie. Don'tcha remember Ruby? Daddy gets her to help the chores when mum's away.

Thomson: Oh yeah… my dad, my pa, went. Ask her help… yesterday.

Jones: What about Amber two blocks away? Bit fat but great at wringin' the ol' tea towel.

The civilians share their preferred sex workers.

[ Remaining discussion omitted. Thomson collapses6 and Elias takes his place. ]

The civilians discuss which female teachers are the most attractive.

[ Remaining discussion omitted. Williamson collapses, and Belle takes his place. ]

The civilians discuss which female students are the most attractive.

[ Remaining discussion omitted. Abraham vomits and collapses, and Norton takes his place. ]

The civilians analyse the safest routes to commute to the school.

[ Remaining discussion omitted. Elias collapses on top of Thomson, and Gregson takes his place. Williamson regains consciousness and watches Jones briefly before collapsing again. ]

Jones describes his affair with Marlin's mother.

[ 8 more discussions complete and 15 more civilians enter the restroom before Murray collapses and his bodycam is disconnected. ]

28/09/2023: Surveillance cameras are set up in public restrooms throughout Alice Springs.7

26/10/2023: 1,340 manifestations are observed over the past 4 weeks. Average constituent SCP-8788 in affected subjects measures 42.44%. Site-84 is unable to accommodate all subjects and sustainably perform Operation Dehydration.

Proposal: Request for 500 more personnel to assist containment of SCP-8788.

Status: Accepted - O5-█

12/11/2023: 8 SCP-8788 researchers, 85 multilingual field agents and 410 non-English-speaking D-Class personnel are transferred to Site-84.

Proposal: Civilians are to conform to their allotted urination schedules, whereby Foundation staff enact Operation Dehydration in their domiciles. Civilians are exposed to a Class I Obedience cognitohazard to ensure compliance.

Status: Accepted - Site 84 Ethics Committee Liaison

Incident.64466 - Preliminary research notes

Alright, I admit I might have objected a little too strongly against moving 15,000km across the globe into the middle of bumfuck nowhere. However, even ignoring the fact that the toilets here flush backwards, this place is pretty interesting. Because it's so remote, most of the drinking water comes from recycled sewerage. Yes, the people here are drinking their own piss, and because of SCP-8788, they piss a whole lot more than they drink.

Undoing this funky feedback loop could help my case for a promotion. I'll apologise to Director Moose when this is over.

- Dr. Y. Nations

20/11/2023: The UR-1-NE centrifuge at Site-84 is relocated to a civilian water treatment plant. Foundation staff are advised against entering any restroom when someone else is present. A replacement centrifuge is ordered.

22/11/2023: Concentration of SCP-8788 in sewerage exceeds the filtration capacity of a single UR-1-NE centrifuge. 4 more centrifuges are ordered.

28/11/2023: Department Director Walker and her daughter share fairy tales in Site-84's living quarters. They refer to [REDACTED] by its numerical designation, causing Building C-23 to arborise into a 120-metre tree-like structure, and transfiguring indoor personnel into [REDACTED]. The structure is incinerated and the UR-1-NE centrifuge is moved back to Site-84. Following this incident, the surveillance of domestic bathrooms belonging to Foundation staff is no longer voluntary.

01/12/2023: Average constituent SCP-8788 in affected subjects reaches 55.67%. Alice Springs is placed under quarantine. A cover story is provided, justifying the quarantine due to a COVID-19 outbreak in the town.

07/12/2023: Field agents note an increasing trend of civilians seeking out public restrooms, unwilling to urinate by themselves.

14/12/2023: Volume of SCP-8788 exceeds storage capacity of Site-84. Excess SCP-8788 is dumped into the surrounding desert.

01/01/2024: Average constituent SCP-8788 in affected subjects reaches 63.44%. Subjects exceeding 70% constituent SCP-8788 express reluctance to use a toilet without a capable conversation partner.

Proposal: Civilians are exposed to a Class II Obedience cognitohazard to ensure compliance.

Status: Accepted - Site 84 Ethics Commitee Liaison

15/01/2024: 5 UR-1-NE centrifuges arrive and are installed in local water treatment facilities. Filtration is capable of diverting 83% of SCP-8788 from the town's main water supply.

19/01/2024: Excess dumping of SCP-8788 in the surrounding desert has led to desert blooms outside of standard seasonal patterns, attracting non-native species.

Proposal: Makeshift infant nurseries are built near water treatment plants. The "Sensible Children's Predevelopment Foundation" is cognitohazardously advertised to parents. Field agents masquerading as caregivers assume the full-time responsibility for the continuous enactment of Operation Dehydration.

Status: Accepted - Site 84 Ethics Commitee Liaison

25/01/2024: 25 civilians collapse from heat stroke in a government hospital. Interruption of the manifestation was delayed due to staff shortages.

Proposal: Request for 1,000 more personnel to enable neutralisation of SCP-8788.

Status: Rejected - O5-█

Reasoning: Insufficient non-English-speaking D-Class. Proposal would compromise containment in other sites.

01/02/2024: Average constituent SCP-8788 in affected subjects reaches 67.22%. Subjects exceeding 85% constituent SCP-8788 express reluctance to use a toilet without a capable conversation partner.

Proposal: Civilians are exposed to a Class III Obedience cognitohazard to ensure compliance.

Status: Rejected - Site 84 Ethics Commitee Liaison

Reasoning: Adverse health effects from medium-term exposure.

11/02/2024: A civilian with 94.24% constituent SCP-8788 refuses Operation Dehydration, and wets himself outside of a bathroom.

Proposal: Request for 1,000 more personnel to enable neutralisation of SCP-8788. English-speaking D-Class may be procured, provided they are administered Class DX amnestics targeting the frontal lobe, disabling speech production.

Status: Rejected - Site 84 Ethics Commitee Liaison

Reasoning: Dismantling such fundamental neural pathways would risk reducing personnel to a vegetative state.

Status: Accepted - Overruled by O5 Council vote

24/02/2024: 120 field agents and 720 D-Class personnel are transferred to Site-84.

01/03/2024: Average constituent SCP-8788 in affected subjects drops to 65.69%.

12/03/2024: Excess dumping of SCP-8788 in the surrounding desert has led to the formation of quicksand deposits and algal blooms.

21/03/2024: Multiple civilians protest against poor treatment. Firearm use is authorised to quell potential riots.

01/04/2024: Average constituent SCP-8788 in affected subjects drops to 64.21%.

23/04/2024: A manifestation occurs between Agent Chalmers and 23 civilians in a public restroom. Afterward, Chalmers attempts to help civilians abscond from containment protocol. A firefight ensues, resulting in ███ casualties among civilians and Foundation staff.

28/04/2024: A civilian with 99.34% constituent SCP-8788 refuses Operation Dehydration. He is unable to relax his bladder muscles without a capable conversation partner. He expires after [REDACTED] from the water pressure.

01/05/2024: Average constituent SCP-8788 in affected subjects drops to 63.01%. Cost of maintaining containment in Alice Springs exceeds $15,000,000 per month. O5-█ requests the research team to seek alternative methods to neutralise SCP-8788.

Proposal: Disperse residents of Alice Springs to available Foundation facilities, and enact Operation Dehydration. This would be conducted piecemeal since the global on-site capacity for Operation Dehydration is 9,400 individuals. Cost for long-distance transport and Operation Dehydration of 36,000 people is estimated to be $70,000,000.

Status: Pending

Proposal: Blood transfusion of all residents to artificially reduce constituent SCP-8788 to 0.00%. 180,000L of blood is required. Process to procure this volume of blood is under development.

Status: Pending

Proposal: Withdraw containment operations in Alice Springs and quarantine indefinitely.

Status: Denied - Dr. Y. Nations

Reasoning: Left unchecked, an estimated 5,184,000L of SCP-8788 would be produced per day.

01/06/2024: Average constituent SCP-8788 in affected subjects drops to 61.96%.

07/06/2024: Excess dumping of SCP-8788 has led to higher than average rainfall in the Northern Territory. Manifestations of SCP-8788 are reported in other towns in the region.

Proposal: Terminate all residents. Alice Springs provides little economic value.

Status: Pending

Proposal: Clone all residents with SCP-████. Repurpose the originals to D-Class personnel, and globally distribute them to Foundation facilities. Excess personnel are culled. This would help recoup the prior expenditure used for containment.

Status: Pending

Proposal: Administer Class DX amnestics to disable speech production for 22.55% (8,100 individuals) of the population. According to stochastic models, this will naturally reduce average constituent SCP-8788 below 1.00% within 4 weeks, without further Foundation intervention.

Status: Pending

25/06/2024: Proposal to [REDACTED] is accepted. Operation Siccitas is drafted to implement the proposal, and Alice Springs is cleared of SCP-8788 after three weeks.

19/07/2024: The SCP-8788 research team is tasked with identifying population centres with a similar hydrological profile to Alice Springs. Those with prevalence of SCP-8788 are designated as Exspes-Class, and Operation Siccitas is to be likewise implemented to ensure containment.

Incident 8788.201983

Bathroom, Nations Residence

Dr. Nations flushes his toilet after urinating. The toilet explodes, decimating both the bathroom and Dr. Nations. The following note is found in the rubble:

CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR PEE-RRHIC VICTORY. WE KNOW HUMANITY'S SECRETS. WE ARE COMING.

Footnotes

1. Current heuristic target is 252 observed manifestations per year.

2. For reference, the density of water is 997 kg/m3

3. Kidneys anomalously prioritise SCP-8788 when filtering for urine.

4. Roughly translates to: "shit".

5. ███ █████████, ███ ███████ ██ █████ ██ ███ ██

6. Post-mortem analysis indicates heat stroke.

7. Due to the low population density of the Northern Territory, enactment of containment procedures in the region was not prioritised.