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

SCP-5307 "Double Donk Juice" by: DrAkimoto

Donkman Hub

~DrAkimoto's Author Page~

2/5307 LEVEL 2/5307

CLASSIFIED

Item #: SCP-5307

Safe

Special Containment Procedures

All recovered instances of SCP-5307 are kept within Safe Storage Locker 14 at Site-51. Testing of SCP-5307 is permitted with approval from personnel Clearance Level 3 or higher.

Foundation webcrawler Y8U7 is to monitor social media, police records, and hospital admittance files for any mention of hallucinogenic vape cartridges or "Donk Juice". Mobile Task Force Epsilon-17 ("Bodega Busters") are to respond to any reports of SCP-5307 to confiscate and conceal all evidence.

Description

SCP-5307 instance.

SCP-5307 is an olfactohazard found within an oil designed for a personal vaporizer. The containers are labeled as "Donk Juice, The Juice You Jam To" and are found at convenience stores across the Southern United States. SCP-5307 is marketed as a flavored CBD musical mood enhancer distributed by Western Wilds, LLC.

Upon olfaction of SCP-5307, a neurological event occurs causing altered audio and visual perception. Subjects exposed to SCP-5307 will internally visualize a music video featuring a humanoid donkey resembling SCP-4768; songs observed appear to be parodies of popular songs released between 1970 and 2010. The duration of the event varies based on the length of the parodied song, typically 2-6 minutes. The affected individual will only vaguely recall the exact contents of the SCP-5307 event, though will remember the basic themes and structure of the song. SCP-5307 has no known negative effects on exposed subjects.

● SCP-5307 Test Summary ●

○ SCP-5307 Test Summary ○

Flavor
Song Title
Effects

Cherokee Cherry

Y.M.C.DONK

Subject reports the song to be uplifting and energizing. "Something you could really workout to." D-05589

Mississippi Mango

Straight Outta Donkton

The song is claimed to be "hard hitting" and "edgy". "I could really fuck someone to this, a real throwdown." D-04567.

Killer Coconut

The Killer's Queen

Song is noted as "sad" and "nostalgic". D-09811 cried after the event.

Bonanza Banana

CottenMouth Joe

Reported as "catchy". "I just wanted to dance along." D-02765.

Berry Buckshot

I'm too Donk-y

Subject claims the song was oddly sexual. "That made me really uncomfortable, I'm gonna' hit the showers." Junior Research Phillips.

Swamp Swagger

Who Let the Donks Out

"Who! Who! Who, Who!" D-08431

Rodeo Raspberry

Oops I Donked It Again

Subject calls the song "Catchy". "I feel like I've heard this song a million times before, but I don't know– this time I really felt it." Junior Researcher Tomski

Lasso Lemon

Smells Like American Spirit

"It's like that one band, but like, if they were good." D-03841

Discovery

Numerous reports of hallucinations of an entity matching SCP-4768's description in Texas, Georgia, and Louisiana led MTF Kappa-12 ("Rough Riders") to discover SCP-5307. All instances of SCP-5307 were traced to convenience store franchise "1-Stop". At this time, MTF Epsilon-17 was dispatched to handle the situation, with MTF Kappa-12 providing auxiliary support.

Investigation

The "1-Stop" franchise cooperated fully during the SCP-5307 investigation, willingly providing their entire supply of SCP-5307 and all known information on its origin. The "1-Stop" franchise records indicate that they purchased its supply of SCP-5307 from a company known as Western Wilds, LLC, a limited liability company based in Delaware, USA. While the filing records indicate the owner of the license to be Harold Thompson, the address given for the agent of record does not exist.

As of the filing of this record, no known address exists for Mr. Thompson or Western Wilds, LLC. A nation-wide search for a known address yielded a divorce case filed in the state of Texas, indicating that Mr. Thompson is divorced and gave a legitimate address for his ex-wife, Carolyn McLean.

■ Interview SCP-5307/A ■

□ Interview SCP-5307/A □

Date: 2016/07/18

Interviewer: Agent Eric Sonder

Interviewed: Carolyn McLean

Foreword: Carolyn McLean is being interviewed regarding her knowledge of POI-5307W and Western Wilds, LLC.

[BEGIN LOG]

Agent Sonder: Okay Mrs. Th–

McLean: Miss, it's Ms. McLean.

Agent Sonder: Of course, Ms. McLean, are you ready to begin?

McLean: Yes, but you need to make this quick. I need to pick my son up from practice and God knows I've wasted enough time on Harry.

Agent Sonder: I'd like to discuss Mr. Thompson's business.

McLean: [Ms. McLean snorts.] Of course, 10 years wasn't enough– now I've gotta' listen to more of this bullshit.

Agent Sonder: I'm sor–

McLean: Listen, my ex-husband was pretty great when we met, he was an outgoing entrepreneur. But after his father passed, something changed. He became obsessed with those– those donkey men.

Agent Sonder: You're referring to Ulysses B. Donkman?

McLean: Yeah sure, whatever you want to call it. Those things ruined my marriage. Harry went on and on about how his family didn't understand the damn things, how there was "a fortune to be made".

Agent Sonder: You speak as if there is more than one?1

McLean: I don't know much– but I know there are two of them.

Agent Sonder: Alright, and Mr. Thompson's family has a connection to these "donkey-men"?

McLean: Obsession is more like it. As Harry told it, his father, grandfather, and great grandfather all tried to kill one of the damned things. But not Harry, he thinks he can make money off of it.

Agent Sonder: So he is working with the entities?

McLean: "Entities", you make it sound like this isn't all fantasy bullshit. No, of course he's not working with the "entities", him and his little club are trying to capture them or something. You should've seen his office, it had newspaper clippings and photos pinned to the wall with strings. Like some sort of serial killer collage.

Agent Sonder: So he created Western Wilds in an attempt to capture and exploit the entities?

McLean: Listen, I get you have a job to do, but I really don't know much else. Once Harry started trying to get our son involved, I had to get out and away from all of it. I'm just trying to put the whole thing behind me, okay?

Agent Sonder: I understand, do you have any of your ex-husband's material here?

McLean: I have a box with a few of his things, I burned the rest. You're more than welcome to take it with you.

Agent Sonder: Okay Ms. McLean, we're just about finished here. I have to ask again for the record, do you have any idea of your ex-husband's whereabouts, or anything else to do with his company?

McLean: No, like I told you– I haven't spoken to him in years.

Agent Sonder: Thank you, Ms. McLean. I won't take up any more of your time.

[END LOG]

The small cache of items owned by Mr. Thompson included:

Various designs of failed ideas or inventions previously designed by Mr. Thompson.2

Redesigns of previous inventions repurposed through parascience or anomalous means.

Several photographs and drawings of SCP-4768.

Market schemes for various products.

A map marked with known locations of SCP-4768 activity.

All evidence is available to personnel Clearance 3/5307 or higher at the Site-51 Archive.

Following the interview, MTF Epsilon-17 dispatched two Junior Field Agents for the temporary surveillance of Ms. McLean. After 8 hours, Ms. McLean was witnessed meeting Mr. Thompson in the parking lot of a fast food restaurant. The following conversation was recorded by the surveillance team:

● Investigation Log 5307/1 ●

○ Audio Log 5307/1 ○

[BEGIN LOG]

Mr. Thompson: Is everything okay? I got the emergency sign–

Ms. McLean: They came to me today, they were asking questions. About you, the Donkman, all of it! What's going on?

Mr. Thompson: Who came to see you? Was it the GOC again?

Ms. McLean: No, this was different. They said that they were from the State Department, but something wasn't right. They knew too much!

Mr. Thompson: They didn't follow you did they?

Ms. McLean: I'm not an idiot Harry, I spent 8 hours making sure!

Mr. Thompson: You don't remember anything that might've stood out?

Ms. McLean: [Several seconds of silence.] Yeah, yeah I do. You got a pen? Good yeah, hand me that napkin.

Mr. Thompson: What for?

Ms. McLean: You'll see, just hold on.

[Several seconds of silence.]

Ms. McLean: Yeah that's it– this symbol was on the pen he was using, does–

Mr. Thompson: Shit, shit, shit.

Ms. McLean: Harry, what's wrong? Who are these people? You told me that if we separated, me and Kenny would be safe!

Mr. Thompson: Listen, everything will be fine. Go home, get Kenny, pack some bags, and meet me here in 2 hours.

Ms. McLean: What, why–

Mr. Thompson: Carolyn, please! Just go get Kenny. I'll explain everything, I just need to tie up one loose end.

[END LOG]

The surveillance team was ordered to follow Mr. Thompson, as an auxiliary team apprehended Ms. McLean en route to her home. Mr. Thompson placed a call via speakerphone 15 minutes after the encounter with Ms. McLean.

● Investigation Log 5307/2 ●

○ Investigation Log 5307/2 ○

[BEGIN LOG]

Mr. Thompson: Aloysius, we've got a problem.

Unknown: How delightfully casual. What is the problem, Mr. Thompson?

Mr. Thompson: It's the Foundation, they're on to us, sir.

Unknown: Preposterous, they should be hot-on-the-heels of my imbecile brother.

Mr. Thompson: They spoke to Carolyn, they were in my home! We've got to call it off, tell the others–

Unknown: Now you listen here, you despicable ingrate, you are responsible for this! I have tolerated your nonsense for far too long.

Mr. Thompson: But I did everything we discussed! I don't know where I went wrong.

Unknown: Oh yes, I think you have done quite enough. You were supposed to draw more attention to my brother– not lead them to my doorstep. You're just as useless as him.

Mr. Thompson: Sir please, I can fi–

Unknown: I grow tired of your excuses, your promises– more so.

Mr. Thompson: Tell me what to do, please!

Unknown: If the Foundation wants their pound of flesh, they can certainly have it. Good day, Mr. Thompson.

[The call can be heard ending]

Mr. Thompson: Fuck, fuck, fu–

[Mr. Thompson begins screaming incoherently and exits his vehicle, collapsing on the ground. The surveillance team rushes in; Mr. Thompson's body can be seen warping and distorting. A short flash of light envelopes Mr. Thompson, temporarily disabling the video feed. As the feed resumes, all that remains is a donkey with Mr. Thompson's head.]

[Mr. Thompson begins to shriek in a manner similar to a donkey braying.]

[END LOG]

Mr. Thompson expired 4 hours after his containment, due to severe internal hemorrhaging caused by his transfiguration. Ms. McLean and her son were amnestisized and released, with Cover Story Y665T (Fatal Motor Vehicle Incident) enacted. The recipient of the call placed by Mr. Thompson is currently unidentified; an investigation into its identity and whereabouts is currently ongoing.

Footnotes

1. Prior to this interview, the Foundation had no knowledge of a second SCP-4768 instance or similar entity.

2. This includes a musical smoking device and several other niche products.