Item #: SCP-4280

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-4280 is to be contained in Locker-1987 in Site-83. Excluding the circumstance of testing, access to Locker-1987 is prohibited to all personnel.

All personnel are to be strictly reminded that they are not to use SCP-4280 for any non-scientific reasons. This includes using SCP-4280 on another person, using SCP-4280 on themselves, or using SCP-4280 on any other entity in the Foundation's custody.

Description: SCP-4280 is a 30 cm x 30 cm x 50 cm sealed glass jar marked with the name 'The Inter-Dimensional Insult Punishment Jar' and accompanied by two blank lines below it. No manufacturer name or logo can be seen on the jar itself. The lid on SCP-4280 is unable to be removed.

SCP-4280's anomalous properties manifest after an individual writes down a name1 and a duration of time2 on the two blank lines. Once filled in, should the noted individual on SCP-4280 say a phrase or sentence intended to emotionally hurt another entity directly or indirectly within the duration of time written on SCP-4280, SCP-4280 will make a loud buzzing noise and vocalise the phrase 'You insulted someone'.

Within 5 seconds after the buzzing noise is made by SCP-4280, a maximum of 50 dollars will be deducted from the individual's bank account and materialise inside SCP-4280 in the form of U.S. dollar notes3. The amount of money deducted is determined by the type of insult they said. (For a comprehensive list, refer to Addendum 4280-A)

At the end of the duration of time, the accumulated money inside SCP-4280 will dematerialise4, with SCP-4280 subsequently vocalising the phrase 'I hope you have learned your lesson'. Following that action, the written name and duration of time on SCP-4280 will disappear.

Within the given duration of time, an individual is unable to erase the written name and duration of time on SCP-4280. All of the individual's money that has been collected by SCP-4280 cannot be retrieved back by the individual.

Addendum 4280-A: Compiled list of the separate fees charged by SCP-4280 for different insults

Open SCP-4280 File A

...

List of Insults recognised and charged by SCP-4280 (with the specific amount of money charged for each separate insult)

Note: All charges are measured in U.S dollars.

Insults including one swear word (e.g. You fuck, Son of a bitch, You piece of shit) - $5.00

Insults including more than one swear word (e.g. Fucking piece of shit, Son of a fucking bitch, You piece of fucking shit bitch) - $7.00

'Your mom' insults - $0.50

Insults focusing on the individual's body figure, appearance, or speech - $10.00

Insults focusing on the individual's personality - $15.50

Insults focusing on the individual's family, friends, or pets - $18.50

Insults referencing a popular character in pop culture, or a historical figure - $18.50

Insults focusing on any Person of Interest/Group of Interest - $25.00

Insults focusing on the individual's religion, race, or sexual orientation - $30.00

Insults focusing on the individual's disability or any other limitation - $40.00

Insults including the phrase 'You krakeling suplan of a wereling trehiog!5' - $50.00

Addendum 4280-B: SCP-4280 Testing Logs

Open SCP-4280 File B

...

Subject Name: Doctor Nikolai Gretka

Duration: 24 hours

Subject Bank Account Balance: $██████

Foreword: Dr. Gretka has been constantly reprimanded for his constant use of vulgarities and overall bad behaviour.

Results: SCP-4280 worked normally. After Dr. Gretka learned that he was a test subject for SCP-4280 three hours into the stated duration, he was observed to be 'nicer' around his fellow researchers. However, at the end of the stated duration, after Dr. Gretka learned that he wasn't getting his money back from SCP-4280, he continuously swore for 3 minutes, after which SCP-4280 stated that he 'had clearly not learned his lesson' and proceeded to charge a 'punishment penalty fee' of $100 from Dr. Gretka's bank account.

Subject Name: D-6517

Duration: 1 hour

Subject Bank Account Balance: $0.00

Results: For every insult D-6517 delivered to another individual, SCP-4280 collected 50 ml of blood from D-6517's body. At the end of the stated duration, SCP-4280 told D-6517 to 'save some money, or it'll take his organs next'.

Subject Name: D-2354

Duration: 1 hour

Subject Bank Account Balance: $██████

Foreword: For the entire duration of the test, D-2354 was ordered to only say statements phrased as insults, but were in reality only statements of fact.

Results: SCP-4280 worked normally, with the exception being that all of its 'You insulted someone' statements were replaced with 'You were too honest' statements. At the end of the stated duration, SCP-4280 told D-2354 to 'tone down his brutal honesty'.

Subject Name: Doctor Reese Martens

Duration: 48 hours

Subject Bank Account Balance: $██████

Foreword: Dr. Martens has been constantly praised by the other researchers as being unwilling to say any insults aimed at other people and generally being a pleasant researcher to work with.

Results: SCP-4280 was not able to collect any money from Dr. Martens until approximately half an hour before the end of the stated duration, when it began to collect $10.00 for every single sentence Dr. Martens said. At the end of the stated duration, SCP-4280 told Dr. Martens to 'fuck off with his fucking good guy routine'.

Note: Looks like SCP-4280 refuses to believe that anyone can be that nice, huh? - Doctor Martens

Footnotes

1. The name must belong to an existing entity.

2. Can be written in any measurement of time, and the duration must last for a minimum of one hour.

3. This action occurs regardless of whether the individual uses a different currency.

4. The Foundation is yet to determine where and who the money inside SCP-4280 goes to.

5. A well-known insult from Dimension-4752.