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SCP-6009-J "HerbiVore" by: DrAkimoto

~DrAkimoto's Author Page~

Item #: SCP-6009-J

Object Class: Neutralized

An Instance of SCP-6009-J

Special Containment Procedures: All instances of SCP-6009-J were held in Safe Storage Refrigeration Unit 5 within Site-101 for 17 days. Upon decomposition, all instances were disposed of in the garbage disposal incineration unit.

Description: SCP-6009-J were 30 instances of sentient cucumbers (Cucumis sativus) that vocalized upon being consumed by a human subject. These vocalizations were sexually explicit and typically voraphilic in nature. The SCP-6009-J were capable of these vocalizations despite lacking internal biology capable of speech. SCP-6009-J had identical composition to baseline cucumbers aside from a mouth hole and discoloration of the skin made to resemble eyes.

Discovery: On 26/8/2019, the Foundation received reports of talking vegetables harassing civilians. All 30 instances of SCP-6009-J were discovered on a vegetable stand in the Long Island Farmer's Market. The sign on the stand had "Succulent Cucumbers" written in bold letters. The search for the person(s) responsible for the stand proved inconclusive. Upon discovery, the SCP-6009-J instances showed no anomalous properties until Field Agent William Morris attempted to consume one of the instances. The SCP-6009-J vocalized a moaning sound followed by the phrase, "Radish me, daddy". All SCP-6009-J instances were brought to Site-101 for containment and study.

Test Log:

Researcher: Dr. Lizen

Subject: D-K7603

Foreword: D-K7603 is to consume an instance of SCP-6009-J.

<Begin Log>

Dr. Lizen: Proceed D-K7603, please eat the cucumber.

D-K7603: What, that's it? Woah why the fuck does it have a face?

Dr. Lizen: Irrelevant, please eat the cucumber D-K7603.

D-K7603: I mean whatever you say.

[D-K7603 proceeds to bite the SCP-6009-J instance.]

SCP-6009-J: [Moaning noises.] Yes, harder!

[D-K7603 drops the SCP-6009-J instance on the table.]

D-K7603: Jesus Chri- that fucking thing just talked!

SCP-6009-J: Don't stop there Papi, eat me, eat me!

Dr. Lizen: Please continue.

D-K7603: You expect me to eat this shit? No way man.

Dr. Lizen: D-K7603 I should not need to remind you what will happen if you do not comply with testing.

[D-K7603 slowly picks up the SCP-6009-3 instance.]

D-K7603: You're some sick fucks you know that?

[D-K7603 bites the SCP-6009-J instance.]

SCP-6009-J: That tastes good, doesn't it big boy?

[D-K7603 takes 3 bites in a quick manner]

SCP-6009-J: [SCP-6009-J emits an elongated moaning sound] Ayos mios Papi, got me hotter than a pepper down here.

D-K7603: Please, man I don't want anymore, thi-this shit is just wrong.

SCP-6009-J: Stick me in your ███ before you ████ me in your ████. ██ ████ ████.

[D-K7603 begins vomiting before throwing the SCP-6009-J across the testing room. The instance explodes against the wall.]

<End Log>

Closing Statement: The remaining instances were kept in Refrigeration Unit 5 until reaching an advanced state of decomposition, at which time the remains were incinerated. No further testing was attempted.