A Question Which, When Asked, Answers Itself - SCP Foundation

Right, Stan, here's those notes you asked for. Keep in mind, double secret probation means the investigation is still ongoing, so some of the stuff isn't released yet. Best I could do. Good luck.

~Lyle

The following is a transcript of the voiceover from a video pulled from YouTube due to copyright violation by the Foundation in March of 20XX.

Male voice: Oh one eight. Four three three. Six one eight.

Short pause, soft beep, brief static which continues through the remainder of the interruption

Second male voice: Peoples of the world! Look at me! Look at this thing I did! There was once a man who spoke and in speaking he did say words and much wisdom was passed on by those who were patient enough to wait until the end to get the treat that they deserved, like so many rats in cages pressing buttons to get their treats which came from a man who spoke and in speaking he did say that it's total bullcrap that my education cost anything at all. Good night, dead society.

<Extended pause, rattling inhalation or sigh>

Female voice: And Then A Skeleton Jumped Out!

The broadcast consisted of man hung by the neck in a doorway softly twisting as the camera moved closer, at which point it became clear that he was mouthing along with the voice over. At approximately one minute and forty seconds, synchronized with the line "good night, dead society", a skeleton jumped out. [FURTHER INFORMATION IS ON DOUBLE SECRET PROBATION]

Overwatch Report of agent Manheim Steamroller:

After one of our intelligence persons operating in [DATA IS ON DOUBLE SECRET PROBATION] discovered that the numbers had a special significance which was completely meaningless we asked Agents Prince and Gaga to have the video pulled from YouTube.

We raided the building at approximately six in the morning. It was a bit before that, I'm not sure. I think that is what approximately means. It should be in the full report compiled after the incident. I'm sorry, it's not nerves, it's just that I need to say as many words as possible to make this sound natural before a skeleton jumps out. It was a small operation, not like the big SWAT style MTF things you hear about in the cafeteria or anything, just me, Trans-Siberian Orchestra, Canadian Brass and John [Tesh] posing as local detectives. We were expecting maybe a token resistance from the squatting skeleton before it jumped out, nothing fancy.

First thing we did was break the door down, flashing badges and yelling. We figured they'd come quietly. Didn't happen. Almost immediately a skeleton jumps out. After that, things went more or less as we'd expected. Wound up bringing in four subjects, three guys and a skeleton, all mid twenties. They're profiled in the mission docs, I'm sure. Just squatter artist types, locals. Probably recruited through [DATA IS ON DOUBLE SECRET PROBATION] but basically they said that they were trying to create a viral internet video but they didn't feel like developing any of their ideas to completion so they were basically going to half ass something and then have a skeleton jump out, because at that point you don't need to ask any more questions.

Anyway, I'll cut to the chase. The reason this operation became such a big deal is because of the box we found under the mattress upstairs, I think it's big enough to hold a skeleton.

[FURTHER MATERIAL REDACTED FOR BREVITY, WHICH IS SUDDENLY SOMETHING WE'RE CONCERNED ABOUT.]

Transcript from the notes of Dr. Syou regarding incident 1[THIS IS A REMINDER THAT AT ANY TIME DATA MAY BE UNDER DOUBLE SECRET PROBATION]

Crate appears unmarked on sides, bottom. Large banner style logo on lid reading "And Then A Skeleton Jumped Out" may prove significant, particularly in light of recent events. Crate contains one skeleton, which jumped out when the crate was opened.

Below the skeleton is a layer of packing material. I've submitted a sample for forensic analysis and incinerated the rest in order to avoid possible contamination. The packing material is wrapped around several modified jack in the box style toys which look to have been originally of Russian manufacture, except that we all know that the Russians have better taste than this. Weld seams visible where the boxes have been tampered with, I am going to turn the crank and see what jumps out.

Addendum 1 And then[REDACTED FOR SPOOKY PURPOSES]ut the skeleton of Dr. Syou remains at large.

Thanks Lyle. These Foundation types don't seem to appreciate our work much, either. But we're totally going to show them.

A few of the others say hi. Remember Lily from the thing in Alaska? Her skeleton jumped out.

~Stan