Sapient Clowns: The Right Opinion and The Truth About Them - SCP Foundation

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Sapient clowns. You've heard about them, but are they really as good as people claim they are?

If you're reading over this now, chances are, you've heard Levealuto Aston's speech, or read a transcript of it. If not, you'll most likely be clueless on my following statements within this piece. My name is Rodrick Schaefer from The Bozian Conservative™1, and I'm writing this to state my opinions on sapient clowns.

1. Sapient clowns and livestock clowns.

In Aston's speech, he says how sapient clowns are in the same family as livestock clowns, which is technically correct. Sapient clowns can form their own ideas and mindsets, which is a trait that they don't have in common with livestock clowns.

However, even if this is true, they shouldn't be treated as if they're much better than livestocks. They're still in the same family; they aren't much different outside of this factor, nor are they close to resembling humans in almost2 any sense.

Sapient clowns aren't superior to any other species, especially not the human race.

Sapient clowns have the ability to exhibit thoughts, emotions, wants and needs, which is more than other clowns do. I am aware that this means they can revolt against humans, yet humans have the resources needed to shut them down. I mean, if they didn't, how else would they have been able to capture them as they have?

Even then, there isn't enough proven sapient clowns to cause a large enough revolt to actually do damage.

2. Sapient clowns and world domination.

First, even looking at that makes it seem absolutely hysterical. Clowns and world domination in the same sentence? It doesn't come off right in any sense. If the sentence doesn't even seem right, how does the entire idea of it make even the smallest amount of sense?

Bingo!

It doesn't.

Like I said in my previous statements; sapient clowns do not have the ability, nor the numbers, to take over humanity.

A vast majority of clowns aren't sapient, which doesn't help the sapient clowns' and Levealuto Aston's situation. Every single sapient clown, and some non-sapient clowns, would have to group up together to at least semi-successfully go through with this idea. It's just not doable, really, especially with sapient clowns being raised around litters of other clowns.

I mean, if you were raised around a bunch of people that weren't able to even form language outside of a certain noise, wouldn't you feel like there wasn't much hope for you as well?

As chucklets, sapient clowns are forced to grow up around other clown-types, which must dwindle their intelligence levels, and might even bring some to becoming/blending in with another type.

In addition, do you really believe that telling a clown to "despise every human except you" will truly work? If you want a clown to hate the entire human race, and you train it to, it'll do exactly that, and won't make an exception for you. It's just purely senseless to believe that that'll work out in your favor.

3. Conclusion.

I hope that after reading my statements, anyone that's reading this has been encouraged against Aston's ideas, and goes with my more rational stance. Sapient clowns aren't higher beings, and shouldn't be treated as such.

As for Levaluto, I hope you come to your senses and realize how irrational this is. I hope so for the safety of yourself and for others, and if you don't, then I hope that you don't do something that harms you or someone else.

I appreciate everyone that's reading this, especially anyone who'll share this around to other people who you might or might not know.

Footnotes

1. A conservative newspaper corporation in favor of preserving traditional practices and regulations within the clown industry.

2. Sapient clowns represent humans in the sense of showing a form of life, as any other creature would.