Welcome To Todays Episode - SCP Foundation

Welcome to Todays Episode

Author: Commluke1

Published on the 3rd of August 2023

A 10 minute read (2000 words)

▸ More by this Author ◂

F.A.Q.

Please Note

This Tale/Play was written in the summer as a one off and is meant to be

performed live by a small group of people in a theater as a short prior to a longer play.

It can still, however, be enjoyed by simply reading it.

Thank you and please enjoy.

Characters

D-Class 2882 "Lily" - Female, Should wear all orange or all red, alternatively a black and white pattern also works. The clothing of all three "Class-D's" should match. Lily is the most energetic and smartest of the trio and the defacto leader of the group. Her hair should be kept similar to that of the other Class-D's.

D-Class 3032 "Robert" - Male, Should wear all orange or all red, alternatively a black and white pattern also works. The clothing of all three "Class-D's" should match. Robert is the most ruthless and the strongest of the group.

D-Class 4832 "Liser" - Male, Should wear all orange or all red, alternatively a black and white pattern also works. The clothing of all three "Class-D's" should match. Liser is the support of the group, often bringing the others when they are feeling down. He is valued and often dragged along by the other two, despite not having too many practical skills. No details on his hair.

The Announcer - Any Gender. Never physically appearing in the play, instead being a voice pulling the strings of SCP-024, speaking in a loud, commanding and energetic voice like a gameshow host to the contestants.

Prop Items

Fake gun (Inside a Backpack)

Ticket

Several desks or other barrier like structures

Several chairs or other obstacles that can be stood on

START

(Curtains open on a dark stage with a single light illuminating stage-left acting as a door

while characters can be heard speaking.)

ROBERT

Dammit, how did we get ourselves into this mess.

LILY

Let’s just get this over with, I just wanna do my time, after that I'm buying a one way ticket to Fiji.

LISER

Yeah, that's probably best… What do you think will happen to us after this?

LISER

I think it'll be straight forward, we get through it, then they probably move us to another facility, the Foundation must have hundreds of these things around the world.

ROBERT

Yeah or maybe we die in the game, or get killed off as soon as it's over. Think about it, if they locked this thing up and are only letting criminals interact with it, it must be dangerous.

LILY

I don't know exactly what's in there but Jake spread rumors before they took him and threw him into the game. Rumors that you could win prizes, even freedom from the Foundation.

LISER

Alright then. It’s not like we really have a choice when we have guns pointed to our heads.

(Liser, Lily and Robert enter onto the illuminated area stage-left. Robert is carrying a backpack provided to him by the staff.)

LILY

Hey it's pretty dark, where's the light switch in this thing?

ANNOUNCER

Hello everyone and welcome to today's episode! I see we have quite the group today.

Let's meet our contestants. Please, tell us about yourselves!

(Lights switch on)

LISER

Who said tha-

ANNOUNCER

That's great! Welcome to the show! Our contestants will compete in a stylized obstacle course for a chance to win fabulous prizes! The Rules are simple! No cheating and that's it! Now for a little legal disclaimer, please pay attention.

(The announcer says the following line very quickly.)

ANNOUNCER

The show is not responsible for any injuries or death as a result of playing, contestants may be exposed to hazardous materials and dangerous situations. By agreeing you forfeit the right to all protests and lawsuits. Contestants cannot leave the show while it is underway, should you not agree you will be escorted out and not be authorized to re-enter. Do you agree?

(All characters take a moment to show confusion)

ANNOUNCER

Do you agree?

LILY

I'd like to know-

ANNOUNCER

All questions must be phrased in the form of an answer. Do you agree?!

(All characters take another moment to show confusion)

ALL BUT ANNOUNCER

Yes.

(Lights go out and stagehands move in props, rearranging several desks into a simple maze for the show before the lights turn back on).

ANNOUNCER

Alright let's get started with round one of three, the first part of our obstacle course, the maze of terrors! Navigate to the end while avoiding "dead" ends to move on to round two!

LILY

Alright. Guess we should stick together and hug the wall, that's usually the best way to solve a maze since you're guaranteed to reach the end.

LISER

A maze can't be that bad, can it?

(Contestants navigate for a bit with Lily leading before she trips and is grabbed by Liser)

ROBERT

Careful! Dammit.

LISER

Is that what I think it is?

LILY

Yep, A punji pit. They used these back in the Vietnam war. I almost fell in, I would have been a goner. Thanks Liser.

ROBERT

That changes things. Come on. We can’t afford to hug the wall anymore, who knows how many of these traps are in this thing.

The group doubles back taking a different route, bullet sound effects are played

ROBERT

Get down! Fuck. Now what?!

LILY

We crawl, the exit can't be far if the announcer is restoring to throwing bullets at us.

(The group makes their way to the next part of the obstacle course, the lights go out,

Stagehands place some chairs as makeshift obstacle, rearranging the area before the lights come back on)

ANNOUNCER

Great work! Welcome to round 2. This will be our quiz round and with it we will be adding a new rule! After every thirty seconds we'll be asking a trivia question, answer correctly or things will get harder!

(The contestants make their way through the stage, stopping to answer questions)

LISER

Well, ok.

ANNOUNCER

Time for our first question! What is the capital of Mauritania?

LILY

I Don't think there's a time limit so we should take our time to ans-

LISER

I don't know? Cape town?

ANNOUNCER

Oh, I'm sorry. The correct answer was Nouakchott. Lava will now slowly rise.

ROBERT

Liser you idiot! Theres a time limit now! We gotta hurry this up.

(Stagelights create an orange glow.)

LILY

Calm down, this is a high stress situation for all of us.

ANNOUNCER

Next question! Where in your body can you find the femur?

LISER

Give me another chance guys, is it. um, it's your leg, right?

ANNOUNCER

That is… correct!

(The players nearly reached the end of round 2 when another question is asked)

ANNOUNCER

Looks like our contestants are almost to the end, we may only have time for one more question! Who wrote the "Merchant of Venice”?

LILY

Oh! I know this one it's Will-

ROBERT

William Faulkner!

ANNOUNCER

Oh I'm sorry, but that's the wrong William! We were looking for William Shakespeare. The room will now flood with poisonous gas.

(Stage Lights turn green to signify the event, the actors cough until the end of Liser's line.)

LILY

Robert I was answering that, Christ the gas is rising fast, hold your breath.

LISER

Oh shit *coughing*, jump!

(The players jump from the final prop, enter stage-right before the lights go out and the stage is once again arraigned by the stagehands to form a half circle of turned-over tables, with the unfinished half facing the audience, before they come back on)

ROBERT

We made it… we… Dammit Liser that was your fault!

LISER

My fault?! You're the one who interrupted Lily when she was about to answer right, and you almost got us disqualified for cheating!

LILY

For the second time calm down, let's just-

ANNOUNCER

Great work on reaching the final round! Please step into the circle.

(The Trio step inside)

ANNOUNCER

Thank you, now I have a special announcement to make. The truth is that there can only be one winner! Those who fail this challenge will be punished as if they were cheating! For this game, we’ll be adding a new ru-

ROBERT

No! I've had enough bullshit. I'm calling the shots now!

(Robert takes out a hidden gun.)

ROBERT

Sorry but if there’s only gunna be one winner then it's gunna be me! I've been saving this for a time like this, the Foundation will probably confiscate it the moment I leave this place, and I will leave.

ANNOUNCER

Using an unauthorized tool brought from the outside is a viola-

Robert

And you! Shut up! I don’t know where you are but when I'm done with this i'll come find you and handle you myself! Lily! Liser! On the ground!

Lily

Rob, have you gone mad?! We have no idea what'll happen if we violate the rules!

Robert

Yeah, well If we keep playing this way two of us will have to find out anyway, and I don’t intend on that being me. Goodbye, Lily.

Liser

Rob don’t!

(Liser jumps in front of Lily as a bullet sound effect is played, he collapsed to the floor.

Lily

Liser No! You're a monster!

Robert

I'm doing what I have to do to make it through this.

Announcer

That's a shame to see! A contestant has just been eliminated and another has violated the rules! A punishment will now be administered, you are disqualified!

Robert

You wanna punish me?! Go ahead! Come at me!

(Robert takes Lily hostage, grabbing her and alternating between aiming his gun at her head and around him before the lights go out. A scream, Liser and Robert are both gone and stagehands remove the desks. The lights remain off for the remainder of the play.

Announcer

Congratulations are in order, contestants! You are the winner! Do tell, how do you feel about your victory?

Lily

Go to hell!

Announcer

That's great! Now let's see your lovely prize! Not only are you free to leave, but you have just won an all-expense paid trip to the Fiji islands!

(Lily takes a moment to compose herself, then on Stage Right, A single light illuminates an exit. Lily leaves, holding a ticket to Fiji that she than throws away into the darkness.)

END

+ A note on usage

Close

Following the principles of create commons, you are free to use and preform this play as you wish, I only ask you site this page.

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