Product: Mortgage

on XX/XX/2023 my daughter and I went to Pulte homes to purchase a new home. We picked out all of our selections and we were told that we would need to give a check for {$20000.00} in order to receive an incentive to purchase by the end of the year. We were quickly prequalified by XXXX XXXX, a Pulte Mortgage Advisor. She sent us a cost estimate sheet. The next day I made arrangements to pull money from different accounts in order to send them the {$20000.00} deposit when I would receive a phone call from another advisor named XXXX XXXX. He asked me for the typical financial statements and bank account records to be uploaded to their portal, or email. We chose to email and my daughter and I filled out the application. It was that same week that XXXX told me I would need to give him a " deposit of $ XXXX down payment. I said I am prepared to pay the $ XXXX deposit we agreed to, and my downpayment will be given at closing. I am selling a home worth $ XXXX. He told me I had to give him that amount. Well, I found that to be odd, but I was getting a $ XXXX incentive to use them, so I went along with it. 
The upcoming weeks were unbelievable. First his assistant deleted our files, we had to re submit. Then she could not verify employment from my daughter, even though we gave them paystubs, tax forms and even the cell number of her HR rep. By XXXX  XXXX, we still di not have an answer. Our application was sent to underwriting several times, and finally I was told, that I would have to sign a " promise to save '' statement, that I would save $ XXXX per month so I could apply that to my downpayment. I was so insulted, since I can afford to pay for both of the homes with my money alone! And again, I planned on putting the proceeds from my home towards the new home. I live in a very desirable area and homes sell very quickly. I told him I would just call my guy, because he was making me feel very uncomfortable. It was then that he told me " if I do not use them, then the builder would not give my loan rep the necessary information in order to close on time, and I would be responsible for additional fees. '' I could not believe he actually told me that! I was floored. I called XXXX and my sales rep and told them how uncomfortable I was, they promised to look into it and XXXX reminded me I did not have to use them. I told her I was very aware of that. I called my guy and I was approved in two days. Since then, Pulte is still looking for information from me, they have changed numbers several times, such as loan amount, incentive amount, they claim they need three year old pay stubs, they do not know how to read my structured settlement court order. They keep asking me to type letters and statements they claim to need, such as why I have a credit card and what is it for. Where did I get my deposit money? 
I am a XXXX XXXX XXXX XXXX XXXX  who worked and saved for years. I have XXXX debt other than my mortgage and utilities, and my take home pay is that of a $ XXXX annual salary, and my daughter makes {$65.00} and has the standard rent and utilities and a credit card with a balance. I have been made to feel like a deadbeat that can not afford this home, I have been lied to, and three months later, they still have not sent my application to underwriting. This business is the epitome of unprofessional, and tried to strong arm me into using their services. They can not answer standard questions, like what is a discount fee? They added the " incentive '' back into the balance sheet and is non existent at the bottom line. I am sure these lending practices are unlawful, and they need to stop intimidating people. I have all of the emails and documents they sent to me should you need them. 
Thank you for your assistance, XXXX XXXX