Product: Mortgage

My husband and I have a 2nd mortgage ( HELOC ) with Bank of America, whose draw period ended as of this month, XXXX, XXXX. We were informed of this in XXXX of XXXX. I called and asked about refinancing the HELOC to an affordable rate as our payment would be increased from about $ XXXX/month to $ XXXX/month. I called and was advised to start the process in XXXX of XXXX, which would give us plenty of time for a refinance to go through. We went to our local branch and met with XXXX XXXX, a mortgage loan officer, who suggested that we refinance our first mortgage ( not a BofA loan ) and combine our second for a rate of about 4.35 %. We agreed and began the process. 
Problems begin. 
*At that first meeting an investment banker came in to the room at XXXX XXXX request and they asked us to transfer a {$25000.00} IRA I had with XXXX XXXX XXXX XXXX XXXX account so that would help assure our refinance. I agreed and did it. *We paid {$470.00} for an appraisal. The appraiser made several mistakes - square footage was lowered by several hundred square feet, comps were not fair comps and the upgrades we had done in our house were not considered. This caused the value to be about {$60000.00} less than it should have been. I complained and gave them realistic comps. They adjusted the square footage and added {$20000.00} to the value but said if we would have to go take pictures of other homes, give data of their sales, etc. if we wanted anything more considered. 
*We received a list of documentation they would need for the underwriters to approve the loan. I would give them everything they asked for and would receive another list of additional documentation needed. I sent it. Everything they asked for. It was never enough and we were given deadlines of sometimes XXXX hours to get multiple documents to them, some in official letter form, signed and dated by us. 
*We went for several weeks without any communication from XXXX XXXX XXXX no return phone calls or Emails. We finally found out that the loan app was rejected. 
The reason given by XXXX XXXX and his assistant, XXXX XXXX, was that the process had gone on too long. The official response by BofA was that our debt to income ratio was too high for the amount of the loan. 
XXXX XXXX called and asked us to come in to the office to reapply for a refi, that it would take less paperwork, etc. than the first time and they could submit it " cleanly '' this time. We agreed. 
The second round was just as bad, or worse, than the first. When I hesitated to give them another {$470.00} appraisal " fee '' ( no new appraisal ) that we would supposedly be credited at a later date, XXXX XXXX advised me that I needed to pay it because the underwriters really wanted to cancel this second app as well. At that point I had had it with BofA and told them we no longer wanted to do business with them. 
This " process '' has gone on for four months! As of next month we will have to start paying over {$2100.00} per month. I am worried about all of the sensitive information we have given them as well as having our signatures on everything. I do n't trust them anymore, after being a loyal customer of 30 years. All we wanted to do was refinance the second mortgage and I feel like we 've been duped by our loan officer, his assistant, the XXXX XXXX broker and the appraiser.