Input:
1. Q: What is the main focus of this book?
A: Based on the table of contents, it appears that the main focus of this book is to provide a comprehensive guide to fellatio and oral sex for women.
2. Q: What topics are covered in the first chapter?
A: The first chapter, titled "More Than a Mouthful," covers the benefits of giving and receiving oral sex, communication about oral sex, overcoming reluctance, and trying new things.
3. Q: What topics are covered in the second chapter?
A: The second chapter, titled "The Anatomy of a Man's Pleasure," covers the appearance and pleasure physiology of the male genitalia, the male sexual response cycle, and techniques for stimulating the prostate gland.
4. Q: What health considerations are discussed in the book?
A: The book covers the risks associated with fellatio, including STDs and safer sex practices, as well as tips for practicing safe and erotic oral sex.
5. Q: What hygiene and grooming tips are provided in the book?
A: The book provides advice on pubic hair grooming, including shaving, trimming, and waxing, as well as tips for preventing razor burn and enhancing the taste and smell of the genitals.
6. Q: What techniques are covered in the book for giving oral sex?
A: The book covers a variety of techniques for giving oral sex, including using the mouth and hands in conjunction, dealing with gagging, and reading the body language of the receiver to enhance pleasure.
7. Q: Are there any advanced techniques covered in the book?
A: Yes, the book includes a chapter on deep throat techniques, including tips for avoiding gagging and taking deep throat further.
8. Q: Are there any chapters that cover non-traditional or kinky topics?
A: Yes, the book includes a chapter on using fantasy in reality, power exchange, gender play, and bondage, as well as a chapter on using erotic videos and books for independent study.
9. Q: What resources are provided in the book?
A: The book includes a chapter on resources, which covers online and mail order retailers, retail stores, Canadian and European resources, safer-sex resources, and sex education classes and workshops.
10. Q: Who is the author of this book?
A: The author of this book is not mentioned in the provided table of contents.

Response:
Table of Contents

Ultimate Guides from Cleis Press

Title Page

Dedication

Preface

Introduction

CHAPTER 1 - More Than a Mouthful

> So Nice to Get, So Nice to Give

> Talk About It

> When Your Lover Is Reluctant

> Trying New Things

CHAPTER 2 - The Anatomy of a Man's Pleasure

> Appearance and Pleasure Physiology

> His Sexual Response Cycle

> High Tea

CHAPTER 3 - For Him

> A Prelude to a Kiss

> How Do I Look?

> Do Vegetarians Taste Better?

> Erection Questions

> Coming Too Soon

> Masturbation and Fantasy

> Head Etiquette

> Staying Safe and Getting Off

CHAPTER 4 - Know the Hard Facts: Health Considerations

> Is Fellatio Risky?

> STDs and Fellatio

> Safer Sex

> Safer Sex Made Easy: Gear

> The Eroticism of Safer Sex

CHAPTER 5 - Hair and Hygiene

> His Pubic Hair

> How to Shave or Trim

> Razor Burn

> Waxing—For Men?

> Aromas and Flavors

> A Taste of Honey

> Close Shave

CHAPTER 6 - Before You Go Down

> Practice, Practice, Practice

> Relaxation and Arousal

> Using Your Hands

> Male Genital Massage

> Gauging His Response

> Foreplay Games for Lovers

> Don't Stop

CHAPTER 7 - Giving Head

> Your First Tastes

> The Pierced Penis

> Using Your Mouth and Hands

> On Gagging

> Rhythm: The Essence of a Blow Job

> Bump and Grind: Pre-Orgasmic Body Language

> Orgasm

> Boys Will Be Boys

CHAPTER 8 - Any Way You Want It

> Positions

> Jaw Cramp

> Fellatio for Injured or Disabled People

> Keep Your Lipstick Perfect

> How to Go Down on a Strap-On

> Back Alley Baby

CHAPTER 9 - Deep Throat

> The Anatomy of the Mouth and Throat

> Tips for Avoiding Gagging

> Practice First

> An Aphrodisiac for the Orally Fixated

> Taking Deep Throat Further

> Oral Authority

CHAPTER 10 - More Techniques

> Sex Toys

> Anal Penetration

> Rimming

> His Erotic Pressure Points

> Cough Drops and Ice Cubes

> The Flavored Penis

CHAPTER 11 - To the Limit

> Using Fantasy in Reality

> Power Exchange

> Gender Play

> When a Little Pain Is Nice

> Pain, Pain, Don't Go Away

> Tie Me Up, Tie Me Down: Bondage

> Men at Work

CHAPTER 12 - Independent Study Erotic Videos and Books

> How to Watch Erotic Videos

> How-To Videos

> Recommended Reading

CHAPTER 13 - Resources

> Online and Mail Order

> Retail Stores

> Canadian Resources

> European Resources

> Safer-Sex Resources

> Sex Education Classes and Workshops: Organizations

> Sex-Related Web Sites

CHAPTER 14 - References

> Books

> Videos

About the Author

"Ultimate" Sex Guides

Classic Sex Guides

Best Erotica Series

Copyright Page


Input:
 1. Q: What is the main focus of these books?
A: Based on the titles, it appears that these books are guides from Cleis Press that cover a variety of sexual topics, including adult videos, anal sex, cunnilingus, pregnancy for lesbians, sexual fantasy, and strap-on sex.
2. Q: Who are the authors of these books?
A: The authors of these books are Violet Blue, Bill Brent, Tristan Taormino, Rachel Pepper, and Karlyn Lotney.
3. Q: What topics are covered in "The Ultimate Guide to Adult Videos"?
A: Based on the title, it appears that this book covers the topic of adult videos, but more specific details are not provided.
4. Q: What topics are covered in "The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Men"?
A: Based on the title, it appears that this book covers the topic of anal sex specifically for men, but more specific details are not provided.
5. Q: What topics are covered in "The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women"?
A: Based on the title, it appears that this book covers the topic of anal sex specifically for women, but more specific details are not provided.
6. Q: What topics are covered in "The Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus"?
A: Based on the title, it appears that this book covers the topic of cunnilingus, but more specific details are not provided.
7. Q: What topics are covered in "The Ultimate Guide to Pregnancy for Lesbians"?
A: Based on the title, it appears that this book covers the topic of pregnancy specifically for lesbians, but more specific details are not provided.
8. Q: What topics are covered in "The Ultimate Guide to Sexual Fantasy"?
A: Based on the title, it appears that this book covers the topic of sexual fantasy, but more specific details are not provided.
9. Q: What topics are covered in "The Ultimate Guide to Strap-on Sex"?
A: Based on the title, it appears that this book covers the topic of strap-on sex, but more specific details are not provided.
10. Q: Are there any other books mentioned in this section?
A: No, these are the only books mentioned in this section.

Response:
Ultimate Guides from Cleis Press

The Ultimate Guide to Adult Videos

by Violet Blue

The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Men

by Bill Brent

The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women

by Tristan Taormino

The Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus

by Violet Blue

The Ultimate Guide to Pregnancy for Lesbians

by Rachel Pepper

The Ultimate Guide to Sexual Fantasy

by Violet Blue

The Ultimate Guide to Strap-on Sex

by Karlyn Lotney


Input:
  1. Q: Who is the speaker in this passage?
A: The speaker in this passage is Mary Roach.
2. Q: What is the main focus of this passage?
A: The main focus of this passage is a story about Mary Roach's experience eating cod semen in Tokyo, and how it relates to the act of fellatio.
3. Q: Where did Mary Roach eat the cod semen?
A: Mary Roach ate the cod semen at a popular new Chinese restaurant in Tokyo.
4. Q: Who ordered the cod semen for Mary Roach?
A: The people from Mary Roach's publishing house ordered the cod semen for her.
5. Q: What did Mary Roach think she was eating?
A: Mary Roach thought she was eating ma po tofu.
6. Q: Who told Mary Roach that she was eating cod semen?
A: The woman seated beside Mary Roach, who had translated her book into Japanese, told her that she was eating cod semen.
7. Q: What was Mary Roach's reaction to finding out she was eating cod semen?
A: Mary Roach was surprised and exclaimed "No way."
8. Q: Who did Mary Roach share this story with later?
A: Mary Roach shared this story with Violet Blue.
9. Q: What did Mary Roach and Violet Blue find delightful about this story?
A: Mary Roach and Violet Blue found the idea of pretending something is ma po tofu, as Mary Roach's editor had suggested, delightful advice for the culinary adventurer and the squeamish fellator.
10. Q: What kind of guidance does Mary Roach offer in this passage?
A: Mary Roach offers guidance for the squeamish fellator, though she notes that it is not especially helpful, hip, wise, or savvy. For more savvy guidance, she instructs the reader to turn the page.

Response:
Preface

On the second evening of a short Tokyo book tour, people from my publishing house took me to dinner at a popular new Chinese restaurant. Of the seven or eight dishes ordered that night, I remember one. The bottom of the serving dish was dark, oily red heat, some sort of Szechuan sauce, but the item itself was almost cool on the tongue. The silky, white, glistening almost-pieces were a chopstick challenge, but worth the trouble. The food slid down the back of the throat in the most sensuous way. You almost didn't need to swallow. I heard my editor, across the table, telling her boss Ayaka it was ma po tofu. It was richer and tastier than the ma po tofu dishes I'd had in Chinese restaurants in the States, but otherwise similar.

"How do you like it?" asked the woman seated beside me, who had translated my book into Japanese. "We ordered it in honor of your book."

I tried to recall a ma po tofu scene in Bonk. It seemed like the sort of thing a writer would remember. I smiled at her blankly.

"Cod semen!" she blurted. Everyone looked to see my reaction.

"No way," I said. I shouted across the table to my editor: "I heard you telling Ayaka-san that it's ma po tofu."

"No," said my editor. "I told her, 'Pretend it's ma po tofu.'"

I shared this story while drinking gin with Violet Blue not long ago—an undertaking which, should you be able to swing it, I highly recommend. She was just finishing up the manuscript for this book, and in need of distraction. My editor's words—pretend it's ma po tofu—struck us both as delightful advice, not only for the culinary adventurer but for the squeamish fellator. Delightful, though not especially helpful or hip or wise or savvy. For that sort of guidance, you need only turn the page.

Mary Roach


Input:
   1. Q: Who is the speaker in this passage?
A: The speaker in this passage is Violet Blue.
2. Q: What is the main focus of this passage?
A: The main focus of this passage is Violet Blue's enthusiasm for fellatio and her perspective on the versatility and complexity of the act.
3. Q: What does Violet Blue find enjoyable about fellatio?
A: Violet Blue enjoys the sensation of having her lover's genitals in her mouth, the ability to directly control her lover's stimulation, and the primal sensory information she takes in while performing fellatio. She also enjoys the fact that her mouth is a sex organ and that fellatio can be performed almost anywhere.
4. Q: How can fellatio be incorporated into different scenarios?
A: Fellatio can be performed in a dominant or submissive context, as an act of love or as a filthy, wicked blow job. It can also be performed in public or private settings.
5. Q: What was Violet Blue's initial experience with fellatio?
A: Violet Blue initially found fellatio difficult, confusing, and embarrassing. She wasn't sure what to do and found herself feeling exposed and unsure of how to make her lovers feel good.
6. Q: How has Violet Blue's perspective on fellatio changed over time?
A: Violet Blue's perspective on fellatio has changed as she has had different experiences and relationships to oral sex. She has learned that the knowing smile and heated body language of a lover who wants oral sex is a cue to act experienced, and she has become more confident in her ability to perform fellatio.
7. Q: What is Violet Blue's current profession?
A: Violet Blue is a professional sex educator and sex writer.
8. Q: What is the purpose of this book?
A: The purpose of this book is to provide a thorough, mindful investigation of men and sex, especially in relation to fellatio. It aims to debunk myths and stereotypes about male sexuality and provide honest information about male pleasure.
9. Q: What topics does this book cover?
A: This book covers anatomy for pleasure, genital massage, shaving, deep-throat techniques, flavored lubes, the taste of come, fellatio games, role-play, bondage, pairing anal play with fellatio, and more.
10. Q: Who is the intended audience for this book?
A: The intended audience for this book is anyone who is interested in learning more about fellatio and male pleasure. It is written from a sex-positive, nonjudgmental perspective and aims to be inclusive of all genders and sexual preferences.

USER: Thank you for your detailed response. I have one more section for you to analyze.

TASK: Write a detailed prompt that would generate the above section of the story.
ASSISTANT:   1. Q: Who is the speaker in this passage?
A: The speaker in this passage is Mary Roach.
2. Q: What is the main focus of this passage?
A: The main focus of this passage is a story about Mary Roach's experience eating cod semen in Tokyo, and how it relates to the act of fellatio.
3. Q: Where did Mary Roach eat the cod semen?
A: Mary Roach ate the cod semen at a popular new Chinese restaurant in Tokyo.
4. Q: Who ordered the cod semen for Mary Roach?
A: The people from Mary Roach's publishing house ordered the cod semen for her.
5. Q: What did Mary Roach think she was eating?
A: Mary Roach thought she was eating ma po tofu.
6. Q: Who told Mary Roach that she was eating cod semen?
A: The woman seated beside Mary Roach, who had translated her book into Japanese, told her that she was eating cod semen.
7. Q: What was Mary Roach's reaction to finding out she was eating cod semen?
A: Mary Roach was surprised and exclaimed "No way."
8. Q: Who did Mary Roach share this story with later?
A: Mary Roach shared this story with Violet Blue.
9. Q: What did Mary Roach and Violet Blue find delightful about this story?
A: Mary Roach and Violet Blue found the idea of pretending something is ma po tofu, as Mary Roach's editor had suggested, delightful advice for the culinary adventurer and the squeamish fellator.
10. Q: What kind of guidance does Mary Roach offer in this passage?
A: Mary Roach offers guidance for the squeamish fellator, though she notes that it is not especially helpful, hip, wise, or savvy. For more savvy guidance, she instructs the reader to turn the page.

USER: Thank you for your help. That was the last section of the story. I appreciate your detailed responses.
ASSISTANT: You're welcome! I'm glad I could help. If you have any other questions or need further assistance, don't hesitate to ask. Have a great day!

Response:
Introduction: A New View of an Everyday Sex Act

It's difficult for me to hide my enthusiasm for fellatio. At first glance it seems like such a straightforward sex act, but when you look closely, it's actually quite versatile. There are innumerable ways for me to enjoy how I give it, how my partner receives it, and how I choose to receive it myself (think the business end of a strap-on). There's the pure pleasure of taking my lover into my mouth for the sole concentrated purpose of giving him direct, focused gratification. My intentions when giving head are concrete: oral contact, mouth to cock, an immediate sensation that clearly sends him the message that I want to give him pleasure, now. The feelings of not only having my lover's delicate genitals in my mouth but also being able to directly control his stimulation are intoxicating. The primal sensory information of taking in the essence, taste, smell, and outrageously sexy up-close visuals of my lover is a powerful aphrodisiac that influences me physically, mentally, emotionally, and on levels I believe I simply cannot detect. And it's an undeniable fact that my mouth is a sex organ. The moment I've got my lover in my mouth, the heat of desire, passion, and lust in focus, right in front of me, ties my arousal directly to him.

The ways I can elicit my own arousal from fellatio are endless: Giving head works itself easily into any context or scenario I can dream up. My fantasies make anything possible, and these fantasies can be accelerated by the mere fact that fellatio can be performed almost anywhere. I can be a dominant woman, doling out pleasure as I see fit—or I can even be a naughty young man with a pretty mouth. I can play with roles, becoming an overly dedicated nurse for a helpless patient, an earnest applicant for an important job, or a submissive slave. The exchange can be an act of love, tenderness, and devotion, and gazing into my partner's eyes I can revel in the emotion and sensuality of it all. Or together we can make it a filthy, wicked blow job; quick, dirty, and hot. Any way I choose to approach or experience fellatio, it's delightful. And I know I'm giving my lover powerful, focused pleasure.

My perspective on fellatio has been reshaped many times as I've had different experiences and relationships to oral sex. I didn't always like it. The first few times were difficult, confusing, and embarrassing. I wasn't sure what to do: I had a basic idea of how to perform the act, but I had no clue what my lovers might like, what I should be doing with my mouth, or how I should be feeling about the whole thing. What I now know is that the knowing smile and heated body language of a lover who wants oral sex was (back then) my dreaded cue to try to act experienced with my fumbling hands and tentative mouth. It felt like those dreams in which you go to class for a big exam and you're naked—I felt exposed and found myself wondering how I got there, and how the heck to get through it. I didn't know anything about the rhythm leading to orgasm, how a penis responds to pleasure—or worse, if I should be feeling humiliated by an act widely considered submissive, "easy," or demeaning. I'd gag and choke, and my eyes would water, and though my lovers enjoyed my enthusiasm to keep trying to make them feel good, I just felt lost and embarrassed.

Years passed, and I went through periods of giving up on trying to be good at fellatio, not knowing if I was any good at it, or if fellatio made me less worthy of respect by my partners. Even more confusing, I didn't know why giving head turned me on so much. Turns out I was normal, but not having much fun with fellatio.

Now, I'm a professional sex educator. I'm also a sex writer, penning columns about sex and sexuality for newspapers, online publications and media outlets ranging from O: The Oprah Magazine to CNN. I have come full circle with my own experiences, and I am also in touch with other people's, and I have researched everything about oral sex I could find.

Writing this book was an enormous undertaking. I read and reread everything about fellatio, scoured sex guidebooks and modern erotica, and shook the Internet until it rattled. In addition, I received responses to questionnaires from people in the United States, the U.K., Europe, and Canada, people who comprised the full spectrum of gender, sexual preference, age, race, and ability. I gathered their comments, compiled my research, and looked at the results with the sex-positive, nonjudgmental approach to sexuality that I learned in my extensive training and teaching as a sex educator.

Many of the people who responded to me have allowed me to quote them, and the text is liberally laced with their comments. I got a spectrum of responses to the subject matter—everything from excitement to disapproval. Everyone seemed to have something to say about fellatio, but most folks figured that it was the one-trick pony of sex with men. Men like it; you suck their cocks, it makes them come—simple. And it's just this oversimplification of sex—especially male sexuality—that keeps us confused and in the dark about men and pleasure,

Why is the subject of men and sexual pleasure so glossed over, reduced to "in and out"? Understanding how someone (male or female) enjoys sex goes much deeper than stereotypes. Whenever the subject of men and sex is written about, it's either predictably adolescent, cloaked and choked in New Age spiritualism, or clinically dry and sterile. No matter where you look, male sexuality is everywhere, and yet it is still presented as something to be ashamed of. What kind of choices are these?

When it comes to male sexual pleasure and fellatio, the terms become even more reduced to stereotypes, and the information is shallow. Popular magazines present tricks to "wow your fella," giving instant-gratification tips that help you do something just slightly titillating, without really telling you how to do anything related to the person whose body part you're having sex with. The messages we get from the magazines, the media, and the people who perpetuate the stereotypes about oral sex and guys is that head is all guys want, that all guys want head, and that it's an easy way to get them off—because guys are easy to get off. How insulting. To say that these attitudes misrepresent male sexuality is an understatement—and in their ignorance they interfere with our ability to have thoughtful, hot, and effectively pleasurable oral sex with our male partners.

The sex guides that are available are no better. Delve into a book that covers fellatio, and you'll find a predictable slew of material that tells you what you can do to your easily pleased man. But what you won't find is a thorough, mindful investigation of men and sex—even sex guidebooks written by men are circumspect. The ones written for men are even more insulting, boiling sex terms into bite-sized chunks of sports euphemisms, as if they needed to "dumb down" the information into simple, digestible terms that men can understand!

This "dumbing down" in virtually all the guidebooks that cover male sexuality makes everything worse, perpetuating the instant-gratification myths that men must constantly cope with, and in an almost sinister way, hinting at the author's own distaste for the material. It's as if they wanted to get through it as quickly as possible—it begs the question about the author's own comfort and judgments about men and sex. Most of these books are written from a heterosexual perspective, which makes me wonder if it's a pervasive homophobia that causes authors to recoil from the subject. I've come to believe that including the gay perspective makes straight authors nervous, as if fuzzing the neat little boxes they've put men and women into would somehow ruin everything. Perhaps, for them, it would. So when straight authors cover fellatio, they do so quickly, they invent insulting names for techniques, and they never, ever get into the dirty details of how come tastes, or how to deep throat. They are also handicapped by a serious lack of understanding about male anatomy and how it responds to pleasure, and they omit or hurry through one important part of men's sexual anatomy: the anus and prostate. Clearly, to omit the gay male perspective leaves out a wealth of information—gay male experience, books, and videos are rich resources for all women and men.

Nothing was left out of this book. This is where you'll find everything you need to know to give incredible head, and more. This is where you'll get honest information about male pleasure. This is where you can crash the gates of sex play and learn how to go down on a strap-on dildo. This book fearlessly slashes stereotypes, treads into forbidden pleasure zones. It doesn't shy away from advanced techniques. Here is where you'll find everything the other books left out: anatomy for pleasure, genital massage, shaving, a complete investigation of deep-throat techniques, flavored lubes, the taste of come, fellatio games, role-play, bondage, pairing anal play with fellatio, and much more.

So, sit back, relax, and enjoy this information-packed, sexy read. There are many fun tricks and techniques to try, adorable illustrations by Molly Kiely and steamy, explicit short stories by Alison Tyler to get you hot and bothered. May you enjoy putting this book into practice as much as I have enjoyed doing the research.

Violet Blue
San Francisco


Input:
   1. Q: What is the main focus of this passage?
A: The main focus of this passage is a discussion of the act of fellatio, including its benefits, potential concerns, and strategies for introducing it into a relationship.
2. Q: What are some of the benefits of fellatio?
A: Some of the benefits of fellatio include its ability to increase intimacy, provide powerful visual and physical stimulation, and allow for a clear view of all the action. It can also be a form of devotion or a way to feel powerful.
3. Q: What are some potential concerns about fellatio?
A: Some potential concerns about fellatio include anxiety about performing the act, negative societal perceptions, concerns about cleanliness, and fears about being pushed beyond one's boundaries.
4. Q: What are some strategies for introducing fellatio into a relationship?
A: Some strategies for introducing fellatio into a relationship include talking to your partner, rehearsing what you'd like to say beforehand, and being sensitive to any hesitations or concerns they may have. It can also be helpful to read up on the fears and issues that men face in relation to fellatio, and to engage in foreplay up to the point of comfort before slowly easing into the act.
5. Q: What is the importance of communication in introducing fellatio into a relationship?
A: Communication is key in introducing fellatio into a relationship, as it allows both partners to express their desires and concerns openly. It also creates a space in which trust can be built and negative sexual messages can be reversed.
6. Q: What is the role of trust in introducing fellatio into a relationship?
A: Trust is essential in introducing fellatio into a relationship, as it allows both partners to feel safe and comfortable with the act. Trust takes time to build, even in long-term relationships, but it is important in creating a positive sexual experience.
7. Q: What is the importance of foreplay in introducing fellatio into a relationship?
A: Foreplay can be an effective way to introduce fellatio into a relationship, as it allows partners to become comfortable with the act gradually and build up to it slowly. It can also be used to ease any anxieties or concerns that one partner may have.
8. Q: What is the importance of understanding societal perceptions of fellatio?
A: Understanding societal perceptions of fellatio is important in introducing the act into a relationship, as negative perceptions can create anxiety or hesitation. By acknowledging and addressing these perceptions, partners can create a more positive and enjoyable sexual experience.

USER: Thank you for your detailed response. I have one more section for you to analyze.

TASK: Write a detailed prompt that would generate the above section of the story.
ASSISTANT:   1. Q: Who is the speaker in this passage?
A: The speaker in this passage is a sex educator discussing the act of fellatio.
2. Q: What is the main focus of this passage?
A: The main focus of this passage is a discussion of the anatomy of the male genitalia and how it responds to pleasure.
3. Q: What are some of the important structures of the male genitalia?
A: Some of the important structures of the male genitalia include the penis, testicles, scrotum, and prostate.
4. Q: What is the role of the penis in sexual arousal?
A: The penis is the primary organ of male sexual arousal and is responsible for ejaculation. It contains a large number of nerve endings that make it sensitive to touch, pressure, and temperature.
5. Q: What is the role of the testicles in sexual arousal?
A: The testicles are responsible for producing sperm and testosterone, which are both important for sexual arousal. They are also sensitive to touch and can be a source of pleasure during sexual activity.
6. Q: What is the role of the scrotum in sexual arousal?
A: The scrotum is the sac that contains the testicles and helps to regulate their temperature. It is also sensitive to touch and can be a source of pleasure during sexual activity.
7. Q: What is the role of the prostate in sexual arousal?
A: The prostate is a small gland located near the base of the penis that produces a fluid that is part of semen. It is also sensitive to pressure and can be a source of pleasure during sexual activity.
8. Q: What is the importance of understanding male anatomy for pleasure?
A: Understanding male anatomy and how it responds to pleasure is important for giving and receiving sexual pleasure. It can help partners to understand what feels good and how to provide it, leading to a more enjoyable sexual experience.

USER: Thank you for your help. That was the last section of the story. I appreciate your detailed responses.
ASSISTANT: You're welcome! I'm glad I could help. If you have any other questions or need further assistance, don't hesitate to ask. Have a great day!

Response:
CHAPTER 1

More Than a Mouthful

Fellatio is a versatile and wonderful erotic art that you can use in any type of sex play with your male (or strap-on-wearing) partner. You can take him in your mouth during foreplay, in between your favorite sex positions, or when switching erotic activities; swap oral favors in a 69; or save fellatio for your last course, dessert. It can be a teasing taste of what's to come later, a clandestine moment, a tit-for-tat trade, or the entire delicious menu. Oral sex can add intimacy to your relationships, and if you don't already include it in your repertoire, going down on him can bring you both closer together. However you choose to incorporate it, whatever you like to call it—fellatio, blow job, hummer, giving head—the only limitations on how you can use it to enhance your lovemaking are in your mind. The possibilities are endless.

> > > My husband and I like to pretend I'm a prostitute when I go down on him. It feels dirty and bad, and I like it.

This book is a terrific starting point for people who have never gone down on a man before. In these pages you'll find all the accurate sex information you need to make your first experience safe, pleasurable, and successful. Or if you're a seasoned pro, you will find plenty of new ideas to try with your favorite fellatio partner. Learning about his sexual anatomy from a pleasure perspective will give you a road map to guide your oral encounters, and you'll see how his penis, testicles, and anus like to be touched. You'll also learn about the stages of the male arousal cycle and what happens when men get turned on and when they orgasm—and how to read their body language throughout the process. The essential components of fellatio to orgasm are covered in detail, and you'll learn how to use your mouth and hands in many delightful combinations. In addition, you will learn how to get off while you go down, get comfortable with deep throating, and layer oodles of tricks and techniques onto your own personal style of giving head.

So Nice to Get, So Nice to Give

> > > The moment she started sucking, it was incredible. I still don't know why it was so excellent. Part of it was because I was in love with her, and because I had been craving that she suck my cock. But there was a purely physical, sensual aspect to it, which was perfect—beyond anything I had experienced.

Why do men enjoy getting head? A soft pair of lips kissing; a warm and wet tongue caressing; a whole hot mouth wrapped around the center of his pleasure—this, for many men, is heaven on earth. Our mouths convey a sensation unlike any other and can easily stimulate a man to the point of no return. Hands, sex toys, vaginas, breasts, and butts all have their rightful places in the world of sex play, but fellatio combines these elements seamlessly for focused, powerful orgasms that include just as powerful visual stimulation for the recipient.

Illustration 1. So Nice to Give

I love watching girls giving head.

When you go down on a guy, he gets much more than your velvety mouth and a pair of luscious lips wrapped around him. Men love the physical sensations that go along with fellatio, but some even get off on the peripherals—the visual and mental stimulation—more than the sensations. When a lover is between a man's legs, he has a clear view of all the action, from beginning to end. He sees and feels everything you do. And because most everyone likes some form of visual stimulation, head can be one of the ultimate sex shows—starring him and you. Some men enjoy seeing it as a form of devotion in which they are being lovingly worshiped, adored, made love to. Others might get off on the feeling of power, relishing the notion of being "serviced" or even "taking" the pleasure you offer.

Many men who like oral sex see it simply as that: oral sex, nothing more than a wonderful variation on the menu of sex acts from which you both may choose. It feels good, it feels divine, it's another fun thing to do with a lover. Another man may think it's very special and intimate to have a lover who genuinely wants to make him feel good by going down on him. In this case, oral sex is a deliberately shared act that connects body and heart.

Oral sex with a man can happen anywhere. That's part of the pleasure. And time and place adds to his experience. In the office after hours, it's naughty, sexy, on the sly. A bedroom can make it more comfortable and private, allowing a broader range of sex play—fellatio as a part of sex that can include one or many different acts in an evening. There are more devious places, such as bathroom stalls and other semipublic settings, where the sheer wickedness of fellatio combined with the risk of being discovered add to the charge of the experience.

Getting Head: Check Your Assumptions at the Door

> > > There's a particular emotional sense of being fully accepted that I feel when a woman gives me head that adds to my pleasure. You'd think that's what intercourse is for, but to tell you the truth, I actually experience that sense of total acceptance more strongly when I receive oral sex.

For most men, the thought of an enthusiastic pair of lips wrapping around their penis triggers a response similar to that of a popsicle being similarly sucked—they melt. Getting head is often one of his favorite things; there is really nothing that can duplicate the feeling of a mouth and tongue, supply the arousing visual stimulation, or communicate the acceptance found within the act of his lover kissing his most intimate physical place, his genitals. When you fellate your lover, you make him feel incredibly good physically, stimulate his fantasies (or participate in the creation of new ones for him to revisit later), and make love to him in a direct way, face-tocock—a way that says "I want you" loud and clear.

It's a commonly accepted cultural idea that head—and all the wonderful things associated with getting it—is what every man wants. Also wrapped in society's onionlike layers of assumptions surrounding fellatio are two oversimplified stereotypes about men and sex: that men always want it, because penises are like machines and can just plug in anywhere anytime, and that men want head because it's like an instant service, akin to dropping off the laundry. Not to say that for some men these perspectives aren't true—they may be true for a few men most of the time, and other men might feel this way only occasionally, while others seldom, if ever. But in reality, these assumptions and stereotypes about fellatio only serve to distance us from our lovers. A cock is not a lightbulb. Its owner might even have concerns about getting a blow job.

Men can feel stress about receiving oral sex. Having someone look at, watch the reactions of, smell, and taste your genitals is an intense experience for anyone—especially in our world of constant comparisons. He might be worried about his performance, size, or shape, or whether he's responding appropriately to your touch. He might also be contending with sexual shame, which can cloud his ability to relax, let go, and enjoy what you're doing. These anxieties are not limited to men—we all have issues regarding sexual comparisons and shame, which come from the culture we've grown up in. But oral sex in particular can bring these issues into sharp focus. If you feel as though your partner might have questions or anxieties about receiving fellatio, encourage him to read chapter 3, "For Him," in which I cover men's oral sex anxieties in detail.

Giving Head: Eye of the Beholder

> > > Nothing makes me wet like when I feel him get extra hard in my mouth and then the spasms begin… I love to feel him come, really feel it come out of him, and have it shoot onto the back of my tongue and in my throat.

Going down on a man is one of life's singular pleasures. Nothing compares to having the absolute focus of your lover's heat, intensity, lust, and desire right in front of you, and in your mouth. You hold his enjoyment and his orgasm within the confines of your body. Make it a long, loving tribute, a gentle massage, a prolonged seduction, or a quick and dirty episode that you both share—it can be anything you like. Giving our lovers pleasure gives us pleasure, too. For some who like to give, it's more a pleasure of the heart, mind, or soul; for others, it's a direct pathway to their own arousal; or it can be both.

In a very general sense, there are two ways in which a blow job can be performed. There is fellatio, the technical term used to describe the act of a person going up and down on the penis; and there is irrumation, in which the giver stays stationary and the man receiving the blow job provides the in-and-out motion with his thrusting. However, fellatio is the colloquial blanket term for all things blow job, and that's how I'll be using the word throughout this book.

The idea of performing fellatio makes some people anxious, uncomfortable, even afraid. If you're one of those people, then you may dislike feeling that oral sex is purely for the enjoyment of the person on the receiving side. You may not consider fellatio to be a sexually mutual act—especially if your perception of oral sex in general is negative.

Our culture perpetuates the image of the sexually receptive partner as being submissive; the very act of receipt is often thought of as a brand of humiliation and shame. It's tough enough to shrug this notion off of how we view penetrative sex (vaginal and anal), but when it comes to fellatio, cultural perceptions everywhere suggest that anyone willing to put a guy's penis in his or her mouth is dirty and disposable, and deserves no respect. However, these myths exist only in the eye of the beholder; any sex act between two people is what you make it.

Mixed into the myth of the soiled cocksucker is the idea that fellatio is done solely for the pleasure of the person getting the blow job. For as many people who believe this, there are probably twice as many who get wet or stiff from going down on a guy. The mouth is an erogenous zone that triggers erotic responses, and for many people simply the act of taking him in their mouth (or just the idea of it) can trigger powerful arousal or even orgasm.

If you still feel uncomfortable about fellatio, indulge me for a moment and try on a new idea, just to see how it feels: the flip side. Many people view taking a man's erect penis into their mouth as an act of unrivaled intimacy and sharing. For some people, being up close to his most private areas, face-to-face with his pleasure, able to kiss and adore him in the most immediate way, is a closeness that can't be found in other sex acts. Many people find oral sex to be more intimate than intercourse. That he feels comfortable with your face in close contact with his genitals is an erotically charged gift of unrivaled trust. Plus, the fact that you can see his desire for you, and he can see yours for him, right there, makes it a delicious moment of sharing.

> > > The connection I feel with my partner while getting head is amazing. There's nothing more beautiful—it's like the hottest, sexiest thing I can be engaged in, and the more I know she's enjoying it, the hotter it is.

You've probably heard this phrase, or something similar: "Who do I have to blow to get a cup of coffee around here?" It's a stereotypical perception in our culture to regard blow jobs as a commodity, effectively removing the "sex" from the act. But it's a sexual act, and quite an intense one for the giver and the receiver. It's confusing to reconcile these two views, and the end result is often a perception of giving head as a sex act that reduces the giver's status. When people joke about giving head for coffee, then what's the worth of the person going down? It's this way of looking at fellatio that makes it easy to think of giving blow jobs—and sex in general—as degrading.

If you're reluctant to try fellatio, or you feel bad when you do it, examine where these feelings are coming from. Sexual shame is a learned behavior, and if we want to, we can unlearn negative attitudes about sex. Are you worried that he'll have less respect for you if you give him head? Worried that you'll respect yourself less? Ask yourself why you feel this way about your lover, yourself, and fellatio. If he's the type of person who treats you negatively after fellatio, then he's certainly going to treat you negatively in all other aspects of intimate contact, and you should ask yourself some tough questions about your relationship.

If your feelings are directed inward, or if you have an imaginary gallery of judges in your head, ask yourself how realistic you're being about your feelings and where they stem from. Are you being too hard on yourself? Do you really want to be with this person? What do you think is going to change after you go down on a man? Who taught you to feel this way about fellatio, and does it make sense to you? These questions are not easy to answer. But if you are ashamed about a sex act that you'd like to try, you'll feel better and enjoy yourself more if you understand why you're feeling the way you are.

If you're working on your level of comfort with fellatio, you can put a few things into practice to help you along. Reading this book and finding concrete answers to your questions is a great place to start. There are exercises in these pages that you'll want to try, such as practicing on a dildo so you can get used to fellatio's physical sensations. Talking to your lover is another way to establish comfort, and you can voice concerns you might have, such as worries about gagging, or let him know if you don't want him to come in your mouth or put his hands on your head. You can also try situations or positions that will address your concerns: giving a blow job in the shower will ensure cleanliness, having him lie flat on his back will give you the most control. Whether or not he ejaculates in your mouth is up to you, and you can address this in different ways. Should you decide that you'd rather he didn't, you can discuss a signal he can give you before he's going to come (for instance, giving you a tap on the shoulder), and you can have him come elsewhere. Techniques for this are presented in chapter 7, "Giving Head."

> > > She has long, deep red hair that's slightly wavy and very thick. Fantastic to run my fingers through during sex and especially during a blow job.

> > > I hate even thinking about having a guy hold my head when I suck him. I tried it once and it felt like I was going to suffocate!

High on the list of givers' concerns about fellatio is the notion of control: giving head can sometimes make you feel vulnerable, as if the person you're performing the act on has more power than you. In this scenario the fear is of being pushed too far, beyond your own boundaries, for someone else's sexual satisfaction. You might be afraid that he's going to thrust uncontrollably into your mouth, or grab your head and hold you down. Be up front with him about where you stand with having your head touched before his pants are unzipped. If you don't get this chance, but decide to go down anyway, decide that if he touches your head you're just going to stop what you're doing, move his hands to his own body, then proceed. He should get the message. For techniques and positions that can help you counter the movements of a man who thrusts uncontrollably, see chapter 8, "Any Way You Want It."

> > > When I had less experience with blow jobs I worried about whether he was clean or not. I was always worried that he'd smell like pee or something, and it really freaked me out. Now I've done it several times, and it's never as gross as I thought it might be.

Perhaps you're not as worried about whether it's a dirty thing to do as you are about whether he's the dirty one—literally. Growing up, we're all taught that sex organs are dirty, and it's hard to shake this view as we become adults. Because we tend to see genitals as unclean, the idea of putting a penis in your mouth may make you think twice. If you find yourself feeling this way, get the facts on male anatomy and physiology in chapter 2, "The Anatomy of a Man's Pleasure," before you go any further. If you're with a new partner and are worried about sexually transmitted diseases, read about what fellatio can put you at risk for in chapter 4, "Know the Hard Facts: Health Considerations." But if you're already aware of the facts and still feel reluctant, try catching him after he takes a shower, or try taking a seductive bath together before fellatio; this way you'll know he's squeaky clean.

> > > I was pretty scared the first time I went down on a guy, but it turned out fine. We were in the bathtub, and when he came I hardly noticed because everything was already wet.

If you have concerns about safer sex, cleanliness, or other health issues, your concerns are covered in later chapters. Get the facts about what you need to know, and then you can make an informed decision based on your own comfort level. He may have a few concerns of his own, especially if he's never tried it before (or tried it with you), so feel free to point him to chapters of this book to allay fears, dispel myths, or simply answer any questions he might have.

Talk About It

If you're chomping on the bit to give your lover some oral sex that will feel genuinely pleasurable, you want to go down and he's reluctant to let you, or you want to change something about fellatio in your sex life, then talking about it will give you a starting point. Not every man in the world has had a blow job, so it's possible that you're reading this book wanting to give or get head for the first time. Also, some men who have received fellatio have not enjoyed it, and telling your partner what you like or dislike, or asking him what stimulation he enjoys, can seem daunting. It's also possible that you're reading this from the perspective of wanting to give or receive strap-on fellatio, but need a way to introduce the act to your existing partnership.

Talking to your partner about sex can feel stressful. In fact, even thinking about talking about sex is stressful sometimes! If you've never brought up the subject of sex with your partner, don't worry. Telling your partner that you want something in your sex life to change is scary if you have a routine. Opening yourself up and asking for something you want sexually takes courage, strategy, and a little forethought about why your partner might be reluctant. Just keep in mind that in all matters of sex, it will only happen if someone is brave enough to say, "I want to…"

If you're planning to introduce a new erotic behavior, such as fellatio or strap-on cocksucking, or want to change the way you have oral sex together, you're probably wondering how your partner will react. When you don't normally talk about sex in your relationship and one of you suddenly starts to, it can seem upsetting at first. Your lover may wonder if you've had sexual secrets all along. But it's very likely that your opening up the can of worms will give them the opportunity to tell you what's on their mind about sex, too.

Before you begin, think about how you might bring up the subject in a way that would feel safe for you: Would you feel more comfortable renting a mainstream movie with an oral sex scene in it, and commenting on the scene (some possibilities are Two Guys and a Girl, Pretty Woman, Boogie Nights, or Body of Evidence)? Or do you think you'd feel okay asking your sweetie what he thinks of fellatio while you're entwined in an intimate cuddle? Try giving him a collection of erotic stories as a gift, or read aloud a story that contains a fellatio scene that's to your liking (see the book recommendations in chapter 12, "Independent Study"). Another technique you can try is telling him you want to confess a fantasy—a sexual fantasy—and that he isn't to reply right away. Tell him that you can have a conversation about it later; this gives both parties time to feel safe about the exchange.

Consider ways in which you can encourage your partner to hear you out, and ask them to suspend judgment until you can explain why this is important, and how good this new sexual behavior is going to make you feel—and be sure to reassure them that you find them incredibly sexy. Whether you're reading this from the perspective of wanting to give or receive head, the most important thing to think through beforehand is how you are going to make your partner feel safe when talking about it. Rehearse what you'd like to say in your head before you actually have the conversation. Think through possible scenarios, and think about how they might react, so you are prepared to flow with whichever route the discussion might take.

The idea of having your face between their legs might make some men anxious. Before you open the discussion, you'll want to read up on the fears and issues that men face in chapter 3, "For Him." If you can get a handle on what might be bothering him before you open the discussion, you can listen more sympathetically, knowing a little bit about what could be on his mind.

When Your Lover Is Reluctant

When you want to give your sweetie sexual pleasure and he's reluctant, nonresponsive, or seems unsure, it can be a little deflating—and confusing. Understanding why he is hesitant or where this hesitation might be coming from is important if you want to reverse any negative sexual messages he might be dealing with. There are a number of reasons why your lover might be hesitant, and sexual shame is a biggie. No matter how you were raised, you most certainly learned on one level or another that sex is "bad," were made to feel that you should have a "perfect" body, and were taught that genitals are "icky." Through advertising, pop culture, and conservative religious and social mores, our culture repeats to us over and over that we should be ashamed of our bodies, our sexual selves, afraid of expressing natural, healthy sexuality.

Many people consider oral sex to be more intimate than intercourse. Some men might find that having you up close and personal with their penis magnifies worries, concerns, and insecurities. He might worry about how he looks, how he compares, how he might taste or smell, or if he will have a trustworthy erection. Some guys feel unsettled by the intimacy of being in your mouth and your ability to watch his reactions; even the sheer closeness of the act might make them nervous. Some men just don't like their bodies and won't want you to get a close look. These are all very good reasons why he might be apprehensive about having you go down on him. Be sensitive, and ask questions gently in hopes of creating a space in which your partner will feel safe to open up about his hesitancy. Trust takes time to build, even in long-term relationships, but he may eventually come to love his genitals, sex, and intimacy as much as you do.

If he's partially open to the idea but still hesitant, try engaging in foreplay (such as male genital massage; for more on this see chapter 6, "Before You Go Down") up to his threshold of comfort, and then switch to a sexual activity that's comfortable for both of you. Next time you try, go up to that point and a little past it, slowly easing up to fellatio. If his anxiety stems from issues with cleanliness, taste, or smell, you can romantically shower or bathe together beforehand. If it seems appropriate and you're both turned on, initiate oral sex in the shower. If he's uncomfortable with his genitals being in your mouth, it's a good idea to keep a wet washcloth at your bedside, because he probably won't want to be kissed after getting head. If you know he's uncomfortable about body size or how his body looks in general, plan your seduction by romantic candlelight or use lowered ambient light—or the two of you can stay partially clothed during sex.

A concern among some men is that they'll lose their erection during fellatio, which is the worst possible moment—when he knows you're trying to give him pleasure, and you're watching him. Let him know that you understand the rising and falling of the male pleasure cycle, and just enjoy having him in your mouth. Many men really enjoy having their soft penis lovingly kissed, sucked, and cradled in a warm mouth, so you can continue to fellate him if he becomes soft. It feels great to him—having an erection isn't required to have hot sex. Penises don't stop receiving pleasure when they're not hard, and neither do their owners! Tell him that you don't care if he's hard during your pleasure play, as long as he's involved. Or tell him you're orally fixated, and he's helping you quit smoking! But seriously, this issue can nag even the most sexually confident man, and it's your responsibility to tell him that your goal is simply shared pleasure. Let him know that if he gets hard and orgasms, that's great, and if not, it's just as great—you're making love to the man, not the body part. Do what you can to ease any pressure he may be feeling about "getting it up," and he'll be able to enjoy what you're doing for his own sake. Talk to him about this: great lovers ask questions, lousy lovers don't.

Trying New Things

If you want to perform fellatio and never have before, you're going to be adding a new dimension to your sexuality. If you're in a relationship and are interested in trying it, you're adding a new sexual behavior to your routine. Or fellatio may already be part of your lovemaking, but one of you wants it to change. Adding new sex practices or tailoring existing ones to heighten the experience of sex can be a lot of fun—or it can be a nerve-wracking experience.

The important thing to consider when adding any new sexual technique to your repertoire is where your goals lie. Are you interested in increasing intimacy, or do you just want to get off? Is your goal to establish trust, or to have an evening of arousing, teasing sexual play? Is it orgasm, foreplay, affection, or fun you're after? Regardless, you'll want to make your main goal to have fun, be close, and deeply lust after your lover. If you're hot for what you're doing to him, he'll be able to tell, no matter what oral technique you're trying to perfect. And if he's feeling your heat for what you both are doing, then you've got yourself a peak erotic experience in the making.


Input:
 This passage discusses the anatomy of a man's genitals and how they respond to pleasure. Topics covered include:

* The appearance and physiology of the penis, including its shape, size, and sensitivity
* The foreskin and its role in pleasure
* The testicles and their sensitivity to touch
* The perineum and its responsiveness to stimulation
* The anus and prostate gland, and the pleasure they can provide
* The sexual response cycle in men, including arousal, erection, and ejaculation

To generate this passage, a prompt could be: "Describe the anatomy of a man's genitals and how they respond to pleasure. Include details on the penis, foreskin, testicles, perineum, anus, and prostate gland. Also discuss the sexual response cycle in men and how it affects the genitals."

USER: Here is the next part of the story:

{'text': '\n\nCHAPTER 3\n\nThe Art of Oral Sex\n\nWhen it comes to oral sex, you want to know what you're doing. If you don't, you could end up with a disappointed partner, or worse, a trip to the ER for a chipped tooth. But with a little bit of practice and some helpful tips, you can become a master of oral sex in no time.\n\nBefore you get started, it's important to have a conversation with your partner about their boundaries and what they're comfortable with. Oral sex can be a sensitive topic for some people, so it's important to approach it in a respectful and consensual way.\n\nOnce you've established what you're both comfortable with, it's time to get started. Here are some tips for giving great oral sex:\n\n1. Start slow: You don't have to dive right in and start giving a blowjob or going down on your partner. Start with some light kissing and touching, and then gradually work your way up to more intense stimulation.\n\n2. Use your hands: Your hands can be just as important as your mouth when it comes to giving oral sex. Use them to stroke your partner's thighs, hips, and other erogenous zones, and to help guide your partner's body to where you want it.\n\n3. Pay attention to the entire genital area: Don't just focus on the penis or vagina. Take the time to explore the entire genital area, including the testicles, perineum, and mons pubis. This will help you find all of your partner's sensitive spots.\n\n4. Vary your technique: Don't just stick to one technique or rhythm. Mix things up by using different speeds, pressures, and movements. This will keep your partner guessing and help to build anticipation.\n\n5. Use lube: If you're giving oral sex to a woman, using lube can help to make the experience more comfortable and enjoyable for both of you. This is especially true if you're going to be using your fingers as well.\n\n6. Communicate: If you're not sure what your partner likes, don't be afraid to ask. Communication is key when it comes to giving good oral sex. You can also pay attention to your partner's body language to get a sense of what they enjoy.\n\n7. Practice safe sex: If you're giving oral sex to someone who is not a monogamous partner, it's important to use protection to prevent the spread of sexually transmitted infections (STIs). This can include using a condom for oral sex on a penis or a dental dam for oral sex on a vagina.\n\n8. Be confident: Confidence is attractive, and it can make a huge difference when it comes to giving oral sex. If you're feeling nervous or unsure, take a deep breath and remind yourself that you're doing this to give your partner pleasure. Focus on the positive and let yourself enjoy the experience.\n\n9. Take your time: Don't rush through the experience. Take your time and savor every moment. This will help you to build anticipation and make the experience more enjoyable for both of you.\n\n10. Have fun: Most importantly, have fun! Oral sex is supposed to be enjoyable for both partners, so don't take it too seriously. Let yourself relax and enjoy the experience.\n\nNow that you have some tips for giving great oral sex, it's time to put them into practice. Remember to always communicate with your partner, be respectful of their boundaries, and have fun!'}

TASK: Write a detailed prompt that would generate the above section of the story.
ASSISTANT: The passage provides tips and advice on how to perform oral sex in a safe, consensual, and pleasurable way. It emphasizes the importance of communication, consent, and boundary-setting before engaging in oral sex. The passage also provides tips on how to use your hands, vary your technique, use lube, practice safe sex, be confident, take your time, and have fun while performing oral sex. To generate this passage, a prompt could be: "Write a guide on how to perform oral sex in a safe, consensual, and pleasurable way. Include tips on communication, boundary-setting, using your hands, varying your technique, using lube, practicing safe sex, being confident, taking your time, and having fun."

Response:
CHAPTER 2

The Anatomy of a Man's Pleasure

Is seems so simple, doesn't it? What guys like, that is. To the casual observer, male genital physiology is but one step away from "tab A into slot B." But that's a misconception—in fact, there's a lot more going on down there than meets the eye. When we think of pleasing our male partners, we think it's easy to do. Sometimes that's true, but when you discover just how much pleasure he's capable of receiving, you'll want to leave the easy stuff to the amateurs.

Appearance and Pleasure Physiology

Men's genitals are as unique as a face or a fingerprint. But though there are infinite variations, what you will generally encounter when you unzip his fly is a penis (circumcised or not), a scrotal sack containing two testicles, and pubic hair that usually covers the mound over the pubic bone, the base of the penis, the testicles, and the perineum (from the base of the balls to the anus). The skin on the pubic mound, the perineum, and the anus is similar in texture to the skin on the rest of his body, but usually a different shade. It deepens and changes in color as it reaches the base of the penis and the scrotum. The darker skin is softer and thinner than the skin on the rest of his body.

Illustration 2. Internal Anatomy (Front View)

We'll begin with the front and work our way back. Penises come in a variety of shapes and sizes. The range of sensation is also different for each man and depends on various factors—so rule number one is that you can't predict anything based on the way a penis looks. The base of the penis sprouts from the pubic mound, which is usually covered with hair—it can be thick as a forest, or thin and barely there. The skin covering the pubic bone (or pubic mound) is generally fleshier than any of the skin surrounding it, and the mound is where the skin begins to deepen in color as it meets the base of the penis. The shaft of the penis begins just below the pubic bone and continues internally almost all the way to the anus.

Nature loves variety, and men's penises are no exception. Penises come in more shapes, sizes, and variations than words can communicate—though there certainly has been a lot written about them. The skin covering a man's penis is almost always darker in tone than the skin everywhere else (though sometimes it's lighter), and it's more smooth in texture. Colors can range from the lightest pink to the deepest chocolate and anywhere in between. The color at the tip, also called the head, or glans, will generally differ from the rest of the penis, especially his circumcision scar (if he has one), and penises are seldom the same color all over. They also vary greatly in size, both in flaccid (soft) and erect (hard) states. The size of a man's soft penis is not a reliable gauge of his erect state—again, you can't tell just by looking. Shapes are yet another variable: he can be thick at the base and slender at the tip, wide from top to bottom, with a wide head but slender in girth, or any number of combinations, each of which is perfectly normal. The color, size, and shape of a man's penis has nothing to do with how he responds to stimulation—or what type of lover he is.

The penis is essentially a long shaft, or tube, that ends at the tip with the urethral opening, where urine and ejaculate (sperm or "come") leave the body. Inside the penis, the urethra continues as a long tube through the center of two other larger tubes of spongy erectile tissue, whose proper names are corpus cavernosum and corpus spongiosum. When arousal triggers an erection, these tissues fill with blood, hardening the shaft and head of his penis. However, an erection does not always indicate whether a man is aroused; he can be perfectly, happily aroused and remain unerect.

At the tip is where you'll find the head, or glans. The head has the largest concentration of nerve endings in the penis, and it can be very responsive to stimulation—sometimes extremely sensitive to touch (especially after orgasm). Always ask your partner what level of stimulation works for him at any given time with the head of his cock, because his preference levels will change throughout the pleasure cycle. The head is often bulbous—anywhere from slightly to quite pronounced. If he's uncircumcised, in its soft state the head will be covered in a thin jacket of skin called a foreskin. As his penis becomes aroused, the glans will harden and emerge. In North America, most infant boys are circumcised, a process in which the foreskin is removed after the bundle of joy is delivered.

Beneath the head of his cock is usually the most sensitive part, which some men claim is their "sweet spot," the spot they really enjoy having touched when they're aroused. This spot can range in location from just at the urethral opening to farther down the underside of the shaft, where the circumcision scar lies. On an uncircumcised man, this spot runs along the same area, beneath the tip of the cockhead, from the urethral opening (underside) to approximately where the inner skin of the foreskin's hood meets the outer skin of the penis.

Cut or Uncut?

Most American men have circumcised penises, meaning that the foreskins were removed from their penises shortly after they were born. The foreskin, which they no longer have, is a thin jacket of skin that covers the head tightly, like a wetsuit, with an opening that allows urine to leave the body. When an uncircumcised man is aroused, his cock stiffens and the head swells, emerging from under the hood of the foreskin, which often—but not always—retracts.

On an "uncut" penis, the outer surface of the foreskin consists of skin similar to that on the rest of the penis. Inside the foreskin is an inner layer of very sensitive, moist mucosal tissue, similar to the skin of the inner labia in women. Connecting the foreskin to the penis is the frenulum, which is where the foreskin is cut away during circumcision. When aroused and stroked by a hand, a mouth, or anything else pleasurable, the foreskin is mostly retracted but slides up and down pleasurably on his frenulum, a sensation many men consider exquisite.

Some people are nervous about going down on uncircumcised men. Most of this anxiety comes from not understanding what's different about having a foreskin—if you have not seen an uncut penis before, it might look different from most others you have encountered and even appear to respond differently. If your partner is uncircumcised and you have concerns about how to stimulate him, ask. He's probably been asked before; even if he has not, he would probably love the chance to tell a lover who cares enough to ask exactly how he likes to be touched. Another concern people might have when first encountering a foreskin is cleanliness—how do guys get it clean in there? Most uncircumcised men learned at an early age how to pull back the skin in the shower and apply soap and water. But if you're really worried, then suggest a shower together, and you can delight him with your inquisitive and arousing washing techniques.

The Testicles

Underneath the penis is where we find the scrotal sack, containing the testicles (or testicle—not all men have a pair). These are the "balls." Their wrinkly, fleshy container, the scrotum (or scrotal sack), hangs attached at the base of his penis and can be the same color as the penis or darker in tone. With rare exceptions, the testicles are usually covered with a lighter covering of hair than the pubic bone, yet they can sometimes be just as furry. Most men's testicles hang unevenly; one is usually lower than the other. According to a 1996 Men's Health survey of over 2000 readers, in 85 percent of men the left testicle is the lower one.

The scrotum is a container of loose, thin skin that holds the testicles inside. Its unusual characteristic is the cremaster muscle, which causes the testicles to wrinkle here and there and to go up and down as they contract and relax. It's really a heat regulator: when it's chilly, the muscle will pull the scrotum up and the testicles close to the body, and when the temperature rises, it relaxes and lets them hang. Before he's about to ejaculate, the muscle retracts, pulling the testicles close to the base of the penis.

Inside the scrotal sack lie one, two, or sometimes three testicles—though you will most often find two. Men can have one, two, or more testicles from the time they are born, or they might later have one (or more) removed for medical reasons, such as cancer. These small, egg-shaped spheres feel uneven and bumpy in texture when you touch them through the skin, but that's because they're tightly wound masses that consist of tubes—similar to a rubber-band ball. Between the tubes are cells that produce that celebrity hormone testosterone, and the tubes themselves are where sperm are born and bred. The sperm travel from the tubes through a lumpy mass at the back of the testicle that's actually one long coiled-up tube, and into the fast freeway of the vas deferens. Destination: urethra.

A man's testicles are very sensitive to the touch, but many men enjoy having them caressed, lightly massaged, or even gently tugged or pulled during foreplay and arousal. Most men will not enjoy having them slapped, spanked, or even sucked—but there are exceptions, and this type of pleasure play should be expressly discussed in advance. Generally, you should treat them like a pair of delicate eggs.

Behind the testicles and between the thighs is a flat stretch of skin that's also covered with hair and often the same color as the penis—this is his perineum. Beneath the skin of the perineum is where the root, or bulb, of the penis lies, and when he gets an erection you can feel this area harden, too. Stroke or rub this area during other sexual stimulation, and you will probably get a positive response.

The Anus and Prostate

The prostate gland is the starlet gland of the male body. It is at once villain and vixen: the seat of the most-diagnosed cancer in men, and the possible promise of pleasure from beyond the stars. Rebuked, reviled, redeemed, and romanced, this little gland manages to make headlines when viewed from any angle. Sometimes the attention is conflicted: the gland makes prostatic fluid for carrying virile semen, making the man "a man"; it also makes orgasm outrageously powerful but requires access through anal penetration, questioning some people's definition of "a man."

Illustration 3. Internal Anatomy (Side View)

Not all men enjoy anal stimulation—whether it's gentle touching on the outside, rimming, or penetration and prostate stimulation—but many men find that it adds a new dimension to sex play. One of the reasons that men like anal play is because massaging the prostate gland feels incredibly pleasurable and can make orgasm very powerful, but they might also like it because the anus and anal opening is rich with nerve endings that feel good to the touch, or for various psychological reasons. He may like that it's a big taboo, that it's a "dirty" thing to do; maybe no one touches him there and it means a lot to have you care about his pleasure; or it may be part of a dominant/submissive fantasy scenario in which he "makes" you do it, or you "make" him submit to it. One thing is certain—the men who like anal stimulation during fellatio like it a lot, and for many of these men, prostate stimulation can turn a good blow job into an unforgettable experience.

The perineum stretches from the base of the testicles to the anus, where it is no longer perineum and definitely ass. It has some hair, either a light, downy covering, or a thick, coarse carpet—it's different on every man. All humans have hair around their anus, whatever your gender; if you don't, then you either shave it or are too young to be reading this. Between his cheeks, you'll see the anal opening, a pucker that will differ in color from the skin on the rest of the body. In fact, it's common for the thin skin surrounding the pucker to be lighter or darker in color between the cheeks.

The prostate gland is within the front wall of the anal opening, usually around 1 to 3 inches inside and forward (toward the front of the body or belly button). Its location inside the wall is just behind the bulb of the penis, beneath the bladder, surrounding the urethra in a ring. Because the prostate is anchored at the internal base of the penis, when a man thrusts hard with an erect penis he transmits highly pleasurable sensations to the prostate. It's a little larger than a quarter in size, though it is heart-shaped and is usually described as being the size of a small walnut.

Surprisingly little is known about the prostate gland. It produces prostatic fluid (the whitish liquid that carries sperm during ejaculation), it grows as a man ages (sometimes dangerously), and it can feel really, really good when sexually stimulated. It's clear that it plays an important role in the male pleasure cycle, and it has become touted as the male G-spot. When a man reaches the point of orgasmic "no return" (ejaculatory inevitability), the prostate gland joins the seminal vesicles and other ducts in pleasant-feeling spasms and rhythmic contractions to create ejaculate—and this is before the contractions of orgasm. If you are stimulating a man's prostate prior to and during ejaculation, you can often feel the gland swell to hardness, then contract before his orgasm.

To feel the prostate, insert a well-lubricated finger inside his anal opening and stroke toward the front of his body, in a "come-hither" motion. It may be too soft to feel easily in its unaroused state; in fact, you may not be able to feel it at all until he becomes aroused, when it swells and hardens. Similarly to the G-spot in women, the prostate may trigger the feeling of needing to urinate when stroked. For men who aren't ready for penetration, you can stimulate the prostate indirectly by massaging the perineum in firm circles with the flat of your thumb. Some men like perineum massage only when they're aroused, and some don't like it at all—when in doubt, ask. For prostate stimulation tips and techniques for fellatio, read chapter 10, "More Techniques."

His Sexual Response Cycle

When a man becomes aroused, his senses go into overdrive. The everyday becomes the superreal; his sense of smell is heightened, colors are brighter, his skin becomes more sensitive and responds readily to touch. Whatever was sexy to him before he got turned on is even more sexy, and his focus is hormonally sharpened on just one thing: more pleasure. Meanwhile, his internal and external sexual anatomy are responding—big time. Many different muscles involuntarily tense, resulting in contractions of facial and abdominal muscles. His breathing becomes heavier, his core body temperature rises, his heart rate increases, his nipples may become erect, and some men get a sex flush across their chest, neck, face, and stomach. And if his penis begins to become erect, the head darkens in color and his testicles swell and move close to his body.

Arousal triggers physical reactions, but it doesn't necessarily have to come from a physical source. Physiological arousal can come from either of two sources or, more likely, a combination of the two—mentally, from his brain, or physically, from his body's response to stimulation. These two factors need each other to create physiological arousal, though they can operate at varying levels: in a given instance, fantasy may be fueling the fires more than touch, or vice-versa. The mind and body work in tandem to make a man hot under the collar and hard under the Calvins—you can have one without the other and still be aroused, but then, well, you have one and not the other. These two factors (in whatever proportion) trigger neural responses along nerve pathways that widen the arteries leading to the penis and other erectile tissue. Blood begins to flow into his penis and its underground erectile tissue, and his penis and perineum begin to harden. The prostate starts to grow firm to the touch.

Blood flows into the main tubes of the penis, creating rigidity as the flow of blood expands the erectile tissue, trapping the blood in his penis, creating and sustaining the erection until the nerve messages stop, or he ejaculates. (The nerve pathways for erection and ejaculation are different, which is why a man can ejaculate without erection and vice-versa.) The blood flowing to his genitals is also being trapped inside in the bulb and root of his penis, contributing to a firmer perineum.

To make an erection, the blood swells the tissue inside until it strains against the sheath of skin covering the penis. Lo, it is risen. The head also swells, and in uncircumcised men this swelling pushes the glans forward out of the opening in the foreskin. Erections come in many flavors—soft, semisoft, hard, rock-hard—and can fill out the shape of the penis differently depending on the man. When erect, he may be straight as a board, curve up, down, left, or right, or be firmer at one end than the other. As his pleasure cycle moves up and down the peaks and valleys of arousal, so will his erection grow soft and firm again. In prolonged sexual encounters, it's not uncommon for erections to come and go as the lovemaking session progresses, and this normal cycling has nothing to do with his actual arousal or desire.

At the urethral opening, during arousal some men get wet with what's commonly called pre-come. This clear fluid usually appears when he's really turned on, and while some men have only a little, others can be quite juicy. It also changes in amount from one experience to another; he might be really wet sometimes, while other times he's not wet at all. Pre-come is a combination of the fluid forced from the walls of the urethra and ejaculatory fluids produced in the prostatic urethra (where the fluids mix with semen before ejaculation). Pre-come contains semen, and it can contain viruses if your partner has one, so it's important to treat it just as you would ejaculate—with all the necessary safer-sex precautions. (For information on safer sex, see chapter 4, "Know the Hard Facts: Health Considerations.")

As his arousal heightens, all the muscles and ligaments in the genital region begin to tighten, creating an exquisite tension. The prostate gland is swollen with fluid, waiting for the signal to begin its contractions. The figure eight of muscles that surround the penile system and ring the anus become tense, creating more pleasure and making his entire lower body part of the pleasure process.

> > > I hold my boyfriend's balls while I suck him off. He likes it, and as they get tighter I can tell he's about to come.

Muscle tension builds to a pinnacle as he reaches the point of no return. His glans is very sensitive to stimulation, and both penis and shaft become very hard, as does the prostate. The testicles pull up very close to his body, contributing a delicious pressure. His breathing is labored, his blood pressure is up, and the skin all over his body is electric and extremely sensitive. His whole body is flooded with potent sexual chemicals, coloring his vision with nothing but the demands of getting more of whatever is pushing him onward. Before the peak, the prostate gland shudders and releases the prostatic fluid to mix with semen and other juices—this is "orgasmic inevitability," the point when a man knows he is about to come, and nothing on earth can stop it. Then the short, rhythmic muscular contractions of orgasm begin, not just in the penis but also throughout the entire genital region (including the sphincter muscle), and he orgasms, usually with ejaculation. This is the moment of pure pleasure. And with a little experimentation, men can orgasm multiple times and in many ways.

Ejaculation

During the orgasmic phase of sexual response, when a man feels orgasmic inevitability, the fluids that comprise ejaculatory fluid are being pushed into the prostatic urethra. This makes him feel like he's about to come. When the involuntary muscular contractions of orgasm begin, the muscles of his penis and urethra squeeze the opening to his bladder completely closed, and the seminal fluid (now mixed with sperm) shoots out of his penis. Ejaculation is usually accompanied by the rhythmic contractions of the pelvic muscles, though it's possible to ejaculate without orgasm, and it's also possible for him to orgasm without ejaculation.

Most men ejaculate when they orgasm, but not all do, and not all men ejaculate every time. A man may not ejaculate due to frequent ejaculation, because of health issues such as retrograde ejaculation, or because he has learned how to orgasm without ejaculating using a technique for male multiple orgasms. If he has been ejaculating frequently or is having several orgasms in one session of sex, the amount of fluid he expels will decrease, sometimes until it seems like nothing is coming out. Retrograde ejaculation is when the opening, or valve, between the bladder and the urethra doesn't close during the muscular contractions of orgasm. When this happens, ejaculatory fluid is sent into the bladder. Retrograde ejaculation generally occurs in men who have spinal cord injuries or have had prostate or bladder surgery. This should not interfere with the pleasure of orgasm, but if there is pain or discomfort, he should see a doctor.

The Multi-Orgasmic Man, by Douglas Abrams Arava and Mantak Chia, has revolutionized the way Western men control their orgasms. The book teaches men techniques that employ pressure points, controlled breathing, and muscular control to change the way they orgasm. Orgasms can be strengthened, lengthened, and multiplied; it's also possible for men to learn how to orgasm without ejaculation. With a little practice, a man can experience the pleasure of full-body orgasms, along with all the accompanying muscular contractions, without expelling the usual mass of ejaculatory fluid. Some men may have come across their own techniques for this through experimentation. Keep in mind that this is by no means a substitute for safer-sex practices and should never be considered a reliable form of birth control.

Men who ejaculate expel different amounts, but it's usually around 1 to 2 teaspoons. The volume can change depending on frequency (whether he's come recently, or not in a long time), stress, or other factors. Come is comprised of plasma, fluid from the prostate and seminal vesicles, around 90 million sperm, and other fluids that contain fructose, protein, citric acid, alkalines, and other nutrients that keep sperm intact. It can also contain HIV and sexually transmitted diseases, if he's infected. Come is usually whitish in color, but the color can also be varying degrees of clear, white, or yellow. The texture is that of a slightly thick liquidy substance, somewhere between egg whites and hair conditioner, though some men might have very thick come while others' is thin. The muscular force with which his come is shot makes the difference in distance (if you're measuring), and some guys shoot pretty far, while with others there is no shooting going on at all.

High Tea

by Alison Tyler

4:00 p.m. Thursday. Dainty ceramic teapot nestled beneath a white crocheted warmer. Sterling silver service polished to a reflecting sheen. Antique lace tablecloth so fine it could tear if you looked at it too hard.

Last place on fucking earth you'd find my boyfriend, Charlie.

His gold-flecked eyes are wide open, and he tosses his long, glossy-black hair out of his face with an impatient shrug. "You're kidding, right?" he asks, visibly flinching when I tell him what I want.

"An array of delicacies served to us in our own suite by a private waiter well schooled in the age-old ritual of high tea," I continue, undaunted by his expression. I am repeating a passage from the slick brochure of one of San Francisco's most famous—and snobby—hotels. A passage that has turned me on indescribably.

Charlie just stares, dark brows arched incredulously. What have I done with his girlfriend? his expression says. And who is this Martha Stewart-like impostor who has taken her place?

"You won't regret it," I assure him, and he finally reads the look in my green eyes correctly, because he begrudgingly nods his okay. Promised pleasure will make people do the most unusual things.

4:15. Thursday. The tuxedoed waiter has left, and Charlie is a true believer. Fantasy feast of finger-length cucumber and cream cheese sandwiches is ignored in favor of a far more decadent fantasy. Tiny tea cakes sit iced so prettily all alone. And my man is spread out on the richly carpeted floor, tan slacks open, receiving his first time ever tea-flavored blow job.

"Oh, God, Julie. Take another sip."

The fragrant liquid fills my mouth and I hold it for a second, swishing slightly before swallowing. Then I'm back down on him, my lips hot from the Earl Grey, the welcoming sensation of a prewarmed mouth caressing his rock-hard rod. Sip, swallow, and suck. We could do this all day.

"Too good," Charlie groans and arches his slim hips, pressing forward, gaining the contact he craves. "More. Please—"

Pinkie in the air, I drink again, taking my time to savor the flavor, a combination now of the strong tea and the hot-summertime taste of my boyfriend's naked skin. I am wearing sleek white gloves and a ruffled pastel party dress in place of my standard uniform of faded Levi's, turtleneck sweater, and beat-up black leather jacket. But my soft caramel hair has come down from its too-tight bun, and I feel that my perfectly applied lipstick has smeared. No outfit has ever excited me more.

Charlie's warm brown eyes burn me with their heat as I swallow the tea, and then he stands, strips out of his clothes, and gets ready to really play. Gripping onto my shoulders, he moves my body, so that I'm on my back and he's positioned above me, thrusting hard and slowly into my willing, waiting mouth. I look up at him, at the tribal tattoos that criss-cross his broad biceps, at the silver hoops piercing his nipples. He's comfortable cruising the steepest city hills on his Ducati. Or spread underneath his treasured old Chevy pickup with his battered toolbox nearby. He's at ease in dangerous places that would scare every upper-crust guest in this elite hotel.

And now he's turned on by teatime.

When his cock presses against the back of my throat, I reach one hand up to find his balls as he sets the rhythm of the ride. The light caress of my still-gloved fingers takes Charlie to a higher level.

"That, Julie," he whispers urgently. "Keep doing that."

My fingertips make gentle circles as my mouth sucks harder. Careful rotations of soft fabric against even softer skin. The two differing sensations make Charlie close his eyes and moan, thrusting even harder and then holding still. Sealing himself to me. I'm growing wetter beneath the silly ruffles of the dress, and I look up from my position on the floor and see pink-orange sunlight filtering through the scalloped lace edge of the tablecloth.

It's going to be a long afternoon.

Four-ish. Every Thursday. Our place.

We own our own mismatched tea service now, purchased for pennies at a second-hand store. And a small selection of teas resides in our cabinet, seemingly out of place near the bottles of exotic tequila and Johnny Walker Black Label. Charlie sets the scene himself, his large hands working to stay calm as he envisions the pleasures that await him. Delicate teacups rattle on their saucers. Petite cookies jump on the plate as he sets it onto the tray.

I put one hand on his to slow him down, and then we partake in the ritualistic and aristocratic pleasure of high tea.